#i think wwx has a lot of baggage around people he loves leaving him. and how so far no one really ended up standing by him

[llycaons]

feel like I've talked about this before but I actually think early relationship wx is going to be kind of a challenge just because wwx in particular has so much emotional baggage around belonging and home and family and loving people and being abandoned and abandoning people and I always thought he'd like. not in a mean or cruel way but he'd test the waters a lot in the early days and kind of push against lwj to see where his limits lie and if he has a breaking point because I think a part of wwx is really freaked out about not being in control of his relationships and if he thinks there's a chance lwj might leave he might try to make it happen first so he can be the one to break it off so he can remain in control of how it ends like he did just after coming back from BM. despite how much older/more mature/settled/stable he is I think there's still a good amount of insecurity buried down deep in his heart that's gotta come out one way or another and ofc lwj isn't going to abandon him or reject him or send him away or let him down or love him any less so they're going to come out of it stronger anyway since wwx just needs to be reassured that this isn't conditional or temporary and with time he'll be able to put to rest those fears and just enjoy being in love and being a partner and being supported the way he always wanted to and now finally is able to...because there haven't been many times in his life he's been so sure of his position in relation to another person, so it's going to take some effort and some time but that's exactly the kind of work that lwj wants to be doing and they have all the time they need

#this is slightly me projecting so idk take it with a grain of salt #I saw it in another post for a different couple who also have a lot of trauma-related baggage #and I was like oh so true. and for wwx too #this is also what I like to read in fics a lot. wwx reacting to stability with fear and lashing out because he hasn't known it #for such a long time and he can't recognize it for safety yet. and so they work on it #coping mechanisms for deep-seated trauma and issues my beloved <3 #cql txp

[tonyglowheart]

In terms of who fell in love when, my interpretation/headcanon is:

Lan Zhan fell in love when they released the lanterns together and he heard Wei Ying’s promise (which he also swore in his heart). The wrapping headband is his equivalent of a crush, I guess. (My thing is, e.g. like the way it was illustrated with his mother, Lan Wangji’s convictions run strong and deep; if he’s committed to someone he’s committed to them. i.e. why he seems to go from 0 to 60 in .2 seconds flat. I think someone else sort of made this point in that gifset with the different types of love, but I think Lan Zhan really does embody agape). But I think after he lost Wei Ying that first time, is when we really start seeing him yearn, it’s a “in hindsight I realized that’s when I fell” moment

The way his love manifests is different between then and WY’s death, vs after he comes back though. Before he tried to offer the support he thought best, which, though not his fault since he wasn’t acting with all of the information, was not what Wei Ying wanted. Whereas afterwards, you see him supporting Wei Ying no matter what. Before he couldn’t commit to saying he trusted Wei Ying, and I think that’s the heart of what he regrets in saying he didn’t “stand” with Wei Ying in Nightless City. Bc looking at it, I kind of think “literally to everyone but you - and this includes Wei Ying - you DID stand with him? That’s why you got punished and censured.” But the big hanging thread there is all of the times Wei Ying asked him if he trusted him, and Lan Zhan could never quite answer unequivocally in the positive.

Wei Wuxian was in, like, crush-precursor through a lot of the Gusu lectures, had a full-crush on him/started falling in love with him by the time they were in QishanWen with the other direct disciples (because this is when he really starts, just, gravitating towards Lan Zhan; before that he was kind of like O_o? when other ppl brought it up, like in Tanzhou with the flower petals and NHS is like “wrow” and he gives NHS a weird look?).

He was definitely full-on in love with Lan Zhan by the time he fled with the Wen Clan remnants and he was like “if I do finally have to fight them (the rest of the cultivation world), then I’d rather have a life-or-death match with you. If I have to die.. then I would have it that I die by your Hanguang-Jun’s hand.” And also when he calls out to Lan Zhan when A-Yuan is clinging to his leg? the longest corniest slo-mo-est pan/zoom-est Wuji-playing-in-the-background-est love montage between these two. Classic romance film tropes. But also because WWX just has so much sheer Big Dumbass Energy and also for personal baggage reasons, I think he maybe never really, like, sat down with himself and the thought of “Hm. I love him.”

I think the moment I’d say he full-on faced or realized the fact that he was in love with Lan Zhan, and embraced it (like let himself embrace it, since I think a lot of their relationship is built on trust and the reciprocation of such, trust is such a huge theme going on in the past-arc) until Jinlin Tower, when Lan Zhan was willing to stand against the whole of the cultivation world with him, showing literally to the whole world just how much Lan Zhan trusted him, quoting back his line about walking down the single-log bridge, and in the face of that much all-encompassing love and trust, what can you do? but start letting yourself really love him back?

#the untamed #mdzs #wangxian #i have a lot i want to say about trust between these two also #i think wwx has a lot of baggage around people he loves leaving him. and how so far no one really ended up standing by him #you see this reflection when they get back to gusu after the jinlin tai reveal and when he's reflecting on it #and he says having gained/earned one zhiji (''soulmate'') in this life.. is enough #also want to say: i don't think lan zhan was wrong to doubt wy. i think we do kind of see that... it was an icarus move #to dabble with yin energies in whatever form. i mean some of what led to wy's downfall was external for sure. but it was precarious > #by nature. sort of like the single-log bridge analogy. maybe - as lxc said - if the world only had wwx his one person.. he could have done i #but because the world is populated with people and they all have their opinions - and agendas.... - he ended up fighting a losing battle #mine #mxtx