#i'm not mainstream gay enough to feel seen by all the mainstream gay pairings. i have to make it more queer

[crimeronan]

What’s your opinion on transfemme hunter + lumity polycule, without willow. Or maybe lavender winter with Gus. Asking cause I really like your thoughts on these things?

i'll be real i love both. the thing about me is that i will enjoy any poly configuration of friends, especially ones that play with gender and sexuality. i've seen more controversy with both of these than even with lavender winter, though, which makes me cautious in how i talk about them. because i am constantly aware that a large part of this fandom has High Standards for when ships are Unproblematic (TM) and i'm like...... i think i interact with media differently than you do. please don't eat me.

anyway with the hexsquad i've seen gus described as "guy in the polycule who's not dating anyone, he's just there" similarly to lilith in any constellation of the adults, which is fine and fun. i also think that once they're older, though, he does not Have to be? i get squicked out by interpretations of gus that are like "he's hunter and willow's baby" because uhhhhh. there are Several Episodes completely dedicated to why that is 1) not true, and 2) a disservice to him.

there's an assumption that anyone who polyships hexsquad wants a 12-year-old to date a 16-year-old but like. i've already said i think lavender winter would figure their shit out later in life. if gus joins the polycule when everyone's in their mid-to-late twenties then the age gap Does Not Fucking Matter.

but like. i know that's controversial. these characters aren't real people and i don't know why ppl are still following me if they have an issue with Problematic Content given some of what i've written about hunter and/or princess luz, so. i shouldn't be anxious about stating this. i've just been thru some shit in past fandoms so i'm always expecting the worst. Be Nice To Me.

as for lumiter with transfem hunter, i similarly love it, and that's precisely Because i'm a dyke with a lot of transfem acquaintances i'd be into in a heartbeat. like join my polycule. i am not exaggerating when i say that every "cis guy" i had a crush on in high school (who i thought could maybe save me from my gayness) later transitioned. or that all the things i found fun and attractive about them turned up 100000x percent once they felt comfortable presenting as women.

like sexuality is fluid and i'd still be a lesbian even if i'd crushed on cis guys who were still cis guys. but it makes me laugh. and hunter is one of those characters who can easily be trans in any direction, and i Love Transfem Hunter So Much.

i do still want willow in there though. like if i have a choice between lumiter with willow and lumiter without willow i'll pick willow every time. by itself, tho, still a Great Triad. a+. very clearly something i'd be happy to write.

i guess the takeaway here is that shipping "rules" don't matter so much to me now that i'm in my late 20s and know what i'm about and know why i like things or don't like things. and the other takeaway is that i'll ship Anything that i find cute or interesting. i like transposing my experiences to the media i consume! this is how most people do fandom!

#i just happen to have controversial experiences re gender sexuality aroaceness and polyamory #i'm not mainstream gay enough to feel seen by all the mainstream gay pairings. i have to make it more queer #this has historically made many people very mad and been widely considered a bad idea #replies #toh #toh fambly #long post #i'm considering making this unrebloggable that's how fuckin worried i am. be nice. if anyone clowns i'll start biting

[absolutebl]

I’ve been watching BL for about 3+ years now and consumed my fair share of series and I have to say the actors’ responsibilities to their characters/series off set is starting to feel very “gay for pay”. What I mean is the majority of the actors, in my opinion, seem very obviously straight but the shipping culture, rabid fans delusions on their personal lives, and requirements to always appear like a couple when In public (fan meets, interviews, reaction videos of their work, variety shows, selling products on live, etc.), make it so that they must always be “on” even upon wrapping their series and this makes me veryy uncomfortable and I feel bad for them. It takes the artistry or this is work element out of what is clearly just a job. I for one try to avoid most of the “IRL” stuff actors do outside of the series itself bc it’s makes me just so uncomfortable and embarrassed…. On another note, it seems like many of these actors take on BL to break into the industry. Is there much success in a popular BL actor pivoting into “mainstream” or non BL celebrity? Bright Vicharawit seems to be doing well and Mew Suppasit. Although I hate to say Mew’s career pivot rubs me entirely the wrong way bc I feel like he didn’t bow out of BL gracefully but used BL and the popularity of his shipped couple and dropped it all like a bad habit trying to erase its existence from his history... I’m sorry my bitter might be showing on that last bit haha. I hope I made some sort of sense. Thanks!

Yes, it's weird, creepy, and exploitive - from all sides. That's why I avoid all the fan service stuff.

With respect to Thai actors? I actually don't know if BL can be seen as "breaking in" since BL the big guns of the industry there. Where else is there to go? Het dramas are less popular, at least outside of the country. Not sure what's going on internally.

Presumably, Mew is getting this chance, and it's a big one, because he looks, well, like Mew (very appealing to a Korean aesthetic), and also I'm assuming speaks Korean well enough to get by. Also, he was always a very very ambitious boy, that one.

I won't blame him entirely for anything tho, MAME's actors seem to have it the worst.

I have my reservations about Korean BL too. I think some of the boys *think* they are getting a leg up but... still too short to ever be leading men material (by Korea's standards). Especially the idols. (”Ieg up” ... see what I did there?) And I think doing BL there can still do more harm than good because of the homophobia (like what happens in China). I think some of the working actors who happened into BL (like the To My Star Boys) seem to be realistic and have fun about it, but they're both established in themselves as people and as actors BEFORE the fandom happened to them.

Japan and Taiwan it's just another job. There seems to be neither weight nor stigma (these days, it was different a decade ago). You can gain a bit of international cred and some sweet modeling and sponsorship deals (see the Cherry Magic boys) and maybe a follow up gig in the form of a movie or whateves, but that's more like just... being part of a successful show.

I don't know, kids becoming celebrities. It's never gonna be pretty, that gruesome combination of performative ego, accelerated attention and wealth, parasocial relationships the then add.... fake dating the same sex in a largely hostile society.

Can't imagine any of these youngsters come out not borked in the head.

Now the ones like MaxTul or even, maybe, MileApo who clearly talked about this and how to handle it with each other, and have some kind of game going on (with each other and us as fans), and entered the situation more grown up aware and mature age-wise (and therefore somewhat fixed in ego and personality) - I don't worry so much about them.

But mostly, since PerthSaint went south what, 4 years ago was it? Yeah, it's ALL creepy.

That's enough of this kinda gossip.

(this post from this one on my reservations about pair branding)

#no tags to protect the guilty #thai bl #bad gossip

[shkspr]

hi. on your post where you may or may not have ended on 'moffat is either your angel or your devil' did you have maybe an elaboration on that somewhere that i could possibly hear about. i'm very much a capaldi era stan and i've never tried to defend the matt smith era even though it had delightful moments sometimes so i wonder where that puts me. i'd love to hear your perspective on moffat as a person with your political perspective. -nicole

hi ok sorry i took so long to respond to this but i dont think you know how LOADED this question is for me but i am so happy to elaborate on that for you. first a few grains of salt to flavor your understanding of the whole situation: a. im unfairly biased against moffat bc im a davies stan and a tennant stan; b. i still very much enjoy and appreciate moffat era who for many reasons; and c. i hate moffat on a personal level far more than i could ever hate his work.

the thing is that its all always gonna be a bit mixed up bc i have to say a bunch of seemingly contradictory things in a row. for instance, a few moffat episodes are some of my absolute favorites of the rtd era, AND the show went way downhill when moffat took over, AND the really good episodes he wrote during the rtd era contained the seeds of his destruction.

like i made that post about the empty child/the doctor dances and it holds true for blink and thats about it bc the girl in the fireplace and silence in the library/forest of the dead are good but not nearly on the same level, and despite the fact that i like them at least nominally, they are also great examples of everything i hate about moffat and how he approached dw as a whole.

basically. doctor who is about people. there are many things about moffats tenure as showrunner that i think are a step up from rtd era who! actual gay people, for one! but i think that can likely be attributed mostly to an evolving Society as opposed to something inherent to him and his work, seeing as rtd is literally gay, and the existence of queer characters in moffats work doesnt mean the existence of good queer characters (ill give him bill but thats it!)

i have a few Primary Grievances with moffat and how he ran dw. all of them are things that got better with capaldi, but didnt go away. they are as follows:

moffat projects his own god complex onto the doctor

rtd era who had a doctor with a god complex. you cant ever be the doctor and not have a god complex. the problem with moffats era specifically is that the god complex was constant and unrepentant and was seen as a fundamental personality trait of the doctor rather than a demon he has to fight. he has the Momence where you feel bad for him, the Momence where he shows his humility or whatever and youre reminded that he doesnt want to be the lonely god, but those are just. moments. in a story where the doctor thinks hes the main character. rtd era doctor was aware that he wasnt the main character. he had to be an authority sometimes and he had to be the loner and he had to be sad about it, but he ultimately understood that he was expendable in a narrative sense.

this is how you get lines like “were the thin fat gay married anglican marines, why would we need names as well?” from the same show that gave you the gut punch moment at the end of midnight when they realize that nobody asked the hostess for her name. and on the one hand, thats a small sticking point, but on the other hand, its just one small example of the simple disregard that moffat has for humanity.

incidentally, this is a huge part of why sherlock sucked so bad: moffats main characters are special bc theyre so much bigger and better than all the normal people, and thats his downfall as a showrunner. he thinks that his audience wants fucking sheldon cooper when what they want is people.

like, ok. think of how many fantastic rtd era eps are based in the scenario “what if the doctor wasnt there? what if he was just out of commission for a bit?” and how those eps are the heart of the show!! bc theyre about people being people!! the thing is that all of the rtd era companions would have died for the doctor but he understood and the story understood that it wasnt about him.

this is like. nine sending rose home to save her life and sacrifice his own vs clara literally metaphysically entwining her existence w the doctor. ten also sending rose with her family to save her life vs river being raised from infancy to be obsessed w the doctor and then falling in love w him. martha leaving bc she values herself enough to make that decision vs amy being treated like a piece of meat.

and this is simultaneously a great callback to when i said that moffats episodes during the rtd era sometimes had the same problems as his show running (bc girl in the fireplace reeks of this), and a great segue into the next grievance.

moffat hates women

he hates women so fucking much. g-d, does steven moffat ever hate women. holy shit, he hates women. especially normal human women who prioritize their normal human lives on an equal or higher level than the doctor. moffat hated rose bc she wasnt special by his standards. the empty child/the doctor dances is the nicest he ever treated her, and she really didnt do much in those eps beyond a fuck ton of flirting.

girl in the fireplace is another shining example of this. youve got rose (who once again has another man to keep her busy, bc moffat doesnt think shes good enough for the doctor) sidelined for no reason only to be saved by the doctor at the last second or whatever. and then youve got reinette, who is pretty and powerful and special!

its just. moffat thinks that the doctor is as shallow and selfish as he is. thats why he thinks the doctor would stay in one place with reinette and not with rose. bc moffat is shallow and sees himself in the doctor and doesnt think he should have to settle for someone boring and normal.

not to mention rose met the doctor as an adult and chose to stay with him whereas reinette is. hm. introduced to the doctor as a child and grows up obsessed with him.

does that sound familiar? it should! bc it is also true of amy and river. and all of them are treated as viable romantic pairings. bc the only women who deserve the doctor are the ones whose entire existence revolves around him. which includes clara as well.

genuinely i think that at least on some level, not even necessarily consciously, that bill was a lesbian in part bc capaldi was too old to appeal to mainstream shippers. like twelve/clara is still a thing but not as universally appealing as eleven/clara but i am just spitballing. but i think they weighed the pros and cons of appealing to the woke crowd over the het shippers and found that gay companion was more profitable. anyway the point is to segue into the next point, which is that moffat hates permanent consequences.

moffat hates permanent consequences

steven moffat does not know how to kill a character. honestly it feels like hes doing it on purpose after a certain point, like he knows he has this habit and hes trying to riff on it to meme his own shit, but it doesnt work. it isnt funny and it isnt harmless, its bad writing.

the end of the doctor dances is so poignant and so meaningful and so fucking good bc its just this once! everybody lives, just this once! and then he does p much the same thing in forest of the dead - this one i could forgive, bc i do think that preserving those peoples consciousnesses did something for the doctor as a character, it wasnt completely meaningless. but everything after that kinda was.

rory died so many times its like. get a hobby lol. amy died at least once iirc but it was all a dream or something. clara died and was erased from the doctors memory. river was in prison and also died. bill? died. all of them sugarcoated or undone or ignored by the narrative to the point of having effectively no impact on the story. the point of a major character death is that its supposed to have a point. and you could argue that a piece of art could be making a point with a pointless death, ie. to put perspective on it and remind you that bad shit just happens, but with moffat the underlying message is always “i can do whatever i want, nothing is permanent or has lasting impact ever.”

basically, with moffat, tragedy exists to be undone. and this was a really brilliant, really wonderful thing in the doctor dances specifically bc it was the doctor clearly having seen his fair share of tragedy that couldnt be helped, now looking on his One Win with pride and delight bc he doesnt get wins like this! and then moffat proceeded to give him the same win over and over and over and over. nobody is ever dead. nobody is ever unable to be saved. and if they are, really truly dead and/or gone, then thats okay bc moffat has decided that [insert mitigating factor here]*

*the mitigating factor is usually some sort of computerized database of souls.

i can hear the moffat stans falling over themselves to remind me that amy and rory definitely died, and they did - after a long and happy life together, they died of old age. i dont consider that a character death any more than any other character choosing to permanently leave the tardis.

and its not just character deaths either, its like, everything. the destruction of gallifrey? never mind lol! character development? scrapped! the same episode four times? lets give it a fifth try and hope nobody notices. bc he doesnt know how to not make the doctor either an omnipotent savior or a self-pitying failure.

it is in nature of doctor who, i believe, for the doctor to win most of the time. like, it wouldnt be a very good show if he didnt win most of the time. but it also wouldnt be a very good show if he won all of the time. my point is that moffats doctor wins too often, and when he doesnt win, it feels empty and hollow rather than genuinely humbling, and you know hes not gonna grow from it pretty much at all.

so like. again, i like all of doctor who i enjoy all of it very much. i just think that steven moffat is a bad show runner and a decent writer at times. and it is frustrating. and im not here to convince or convert anyone im just living my truth. thank you for listening.

#sorry if this is repetitive or makes no sense or if i got some details of the show wrong #i simply couldnt be bothered to put too much effort into this post #lest it become a research paper and take me several weeks to answer #anyway thats all my opinions #dw #ok to rb