#i've been chipping away at this for MONTHS so im just saying fuck it. its done

[spacecolonie]

heist activities  💸   (print)

#sonic #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #rouge the bat #e123-omega #team dark #i've been chipping away at this for MONTHS so im just saying fuck it. its done

[lovelywingsart]

Plans for after 'Dear Mother' (kinda long plan update shite!)

So y'all have probably noticed that I'm going ham on 'Dear Mother' - Thats because I gave myself the goal of finishing it before years end. And, good news, its almost done!!! So really, im just here to say my plans afterwards since I really haven't been updating much at all;

> Immediately after Dear Mother is finished, I'll be going on a partial hiatus to finish Baldurs Gate 3 and give myself time to relax and just... give myself a fucking break. The only times I'll be on the computer are the 2 days a week my fiance uses the PS5 to play with friends, so those are the only time I'll be doing any kind of art, be it personal or commission work. So if you happen to get a commission, please do not expect it right away. The general TAT for small things is 2 weeks, and with this hiatus and minimal energy, it might be longer. But I'll be giving myself a very... VERY much needed break to finish BG3 and have more shenanigans afterwards.

> When hiatus is over, be it immediately after the game or giving some time to work on other things, I'll be starting a new comic, and will try to pace myself a little bit because its going to be... huge. There will also be one more Survival AU written story before it starts- because this comic will be the fight against Miranda, involving the Lords, Emelia and Ethan. It is going to be huge, and its going to be difficult. There will be no other primary written stories until after its done unless there's a drabble or something someone asks me to make. I'll be finishing up and perfecting a few stories for after that's done, though I will primarily be working on the Survival AU with art, as well.

> Now, when the Survival AU comic is done, I may take another break, because there's yet another comic I'm going to start, which will be Emelias arrival to the factory. The start of this comic will also kickstart primary work focusing on the first few years of Emelias arrival. I am going to say now that while yes, they may have their moments, there will be quite a bit of mildly uncomfortable subjects, as the first few years involved some heavy mutual abuse from both. You'll get to see how she got there and how they managed the first few years as well as quite a bit with her having... well, two eyes 😂 I'll give another warning when I get there but yknow. I've said before how genuinely dysfunctional they are with a few written examples, but I feel like it'll be a different story with proper visual...

And while I'm working on that fun little bit, I'll also be introducing a new written series that I've been secretly chipping away at- While I work on Emelias background and arrival, I'll also be working on Karls.

I will be working on/posting a small(?) mini(???) series of Karls own backstory. It will include his own 'arrival' to the village, interactions with Miranda and occasionally the Lords, and even smaller things such as the loss of his leg and how he got the scars across his nose and throat, all up until Emelia is dropped off. I don't plan on there being VERY many stories, though I will absolutely be more than open to writing for him if anyone has other ideas! 💙

And... thats it for now! Noting that the next two comics are going to take quite a while, ESPECIALLY the Survival AU one... I've no idea how long everything will take exactly, and all this is going off of if life decides to give me a fucking break. There's still alot going on, and I'm struggling alot... but I still have plans. Dear Mother will be finished before the new year (if not nearly exactly ON new years depending on our plans for the next two weeks and me not getting burnt out) and I'll have January to attempt to recuperate. Will I take the entire month? I'm not sure. But given shit doesn't go wrong like it did this year, we might be ok.

But... yeah! Thats about it. Right now I'm focusing on Dear Mother and trying my best. Comms ARE still open but will just take a lil bit more time than usual, so if you're fine waiting, hit me up 👍

#update #i got big plans for Metalworks #im very excited and i hope you guys are too!!! #ive already nearly made a few people cry with the first bit of Karls backstory that i shared so im VERY excited 😎 #get ready to bawl your fuckin eyes out my dudes youre in for a bumpy horrible ride with a whole ass load of ANGST

[mellowgoop]

I think im going to start rambling on tumblr now and again, at least as long as it gets hidden by the "show full post" thing, lol...

I've been thinking a lot about heart and soul lately... in 2021, all my definitions of emotional home got fucked up and mangled pretty badly, so its fair to say my heart got broken six ways to sunday too... I was really numb, but rather than going into a hidey hole it felt more authentic to head out there and take on big challenges and see what happened next (with a note tucked in my heart, like, "come back and fix this, you are very unwell right now")

I got my ass kicked (i am still getting my ass kicked) but along the way, I was filled with determination to find some way to get my heart back. I did some pretty ridiculous stuff in order to try and get that bad boy open again. (I did entirely fucking ridiculous things to get that bad boy open.) Luckily, it didn't take long before I did start to feel warmth come back and I'm really happy to say I like how my little heart is doing now a year later (I love you, my friends!)

Now that I'm stitching myself back together, I keep wondering about what happened back then and where the determination came from. Maybe for a month or two it was purely desepration but that shit is like running your body with gasoline and I do not recommend it.

Two months of desperation is nothing compared to the entire lifetimes of desperation our fucked up little society likes to create, so there is a really strong sense of privilege in having a say in Any of this. I woke up every day stupidly deadset on not wasting my opportunities, and what clicked was being crafty as fuck.

And I think that craftiness is something authentic for me, I can get my heart to agree to pretty much anything if there is a plan behind it. I kind of got to work using what mental health and job opportunity resources I had in order to get my heart working again, to start to trust the world again and feel connected to society again. Those plans were off the shits crazy, but my body and my heart never really resisted it. Now, I'm feeling like my heart is ok with the ups and downs because my crafty soul never gave out and kept putting healing first when it could.

I guess what I mean to say is... I believe the heart is connected to the body and the warm stuff and our friends and hugging and hope and stuff. It gets the good food at the grocery store because it knows how to comfort you. The soul is, in my opinion, a little harder to pin down but it does a different job. Its like the seed for the minecraft world of your body, its the reason things fall into place the way they do for you, it doesn't get broken as much as your heart does because it lives in idealsland whereas your heart lives in meatland.

Letting my heart drive, I've made lots of friends and created lovely things and even made my own homes now and again. But, the heart is a dumb little beastie sometimes and it wants what it wants and isnt always smart about it. You can fall in love with some really dumb shit sometimes, you know that

Letting my soul drive, in hindsight, lets me pick crazy destinations a million miles away because they just *seem right* which is fun as shit. But, it doesnt always take into consideration how it will feel to get there and the stress of the journey can break your heart and your bones and your friendships and you get ulcers and... please dont get ulcers...

I think these two little creachers really need to work together... the heart on its own will just eat chips and hide in its safe spot but the soul on its own will leave you kind of like a travelling robot with no home. When you put them TOGETHER though... its like being on a roadtrip to someplace bullshit exciting, but the whole time youre with your friends and listening to your favorite songs and its miles and miles of good times.

Being in touch with either isnt a mental health privelege everyone has, which is fucking nuts. But being able to lose and regain these feelings over and over in my life so far has probably been my primary motivator to keep going, and I love them a lot...

#my thoughts #GIGA long post

[starsdreaming]

Advice would be appreciated/ I need to get this off my chest, it's gonna be long, I'm sorry.

So, I have a friend, this is absolutely not me but I'm not giving names, and she's dating this guy who seems to have a great personality, jives with her, gets where she's coming headspace wise, and the like. She has fairly severe anxiety due to things. Well, he has depression, and probably anxiety as well. And up till just recently they worked well together. She was happier, the anxiety didn't seem so bad, and I'm fairly sure he was as well, but I hadn't actually met him at this point.

The problem comes from his living situation. It's not....ideal, from what I've gathered from my friend. controlling woman who doesn't work, her boyfriend who doesn't work, kids who call him dad. He's the only one that works, but she has his card. According to my friend, hes said its like a cult. I'm hearing all this second hand.

When the guy and my friend weren't dating they saw each other quite a bit. Same during the first month of dating. Now, she hasn't seen him in 3 going on 4 weeks and he has just started responding again. I generally get drug into the drama when her anxiety is acting up and she needs reassurance that she's not the reason he's pulling away or hasn't talked. And at first, it was every couple of weeks. Now, im getting texts from her, roughly, every three days. I'm usually pretty good about calming her down and giving logical advice that she says she at least thinks about once she's calmed down. The problem is, I'm out of advice. I reminded her he said it was like a cult. And that the other....woman, is controlling and sees her as a threat, and said the options are to keep chipping away at the control but be prepared for heartbreak fairly regularly, or break it off, because where he's at now is not good for her mental state.

He's been offered 2 places to stay, so he has options to get out.

I'm just at a fucking loss on how to deal with this and I'm exhausted

#personal