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karmade · 5 years

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okay... i didnt like far from home.

well, spiderman far from home spoilers ahead.

i honestly never expected that I’ll type up something like that after spider man movie... after homecoming, that comforted my tortured by civil war soul in best way possible, i hoped that far from home will help me, and peter, to cope with endgame.

well, it made me feel worse.

Starting with: NICK FURY. I always had up and down relationship with him, but after Captain Marvel I was really cool with him. Yet in FFH, he hit the bottom way too fast: Fury demands Spider Man to help take down creatures that supposedly destroyed the earth of other dimension: water and fire element creatures. Spider Man, who’s abilities include super strenght, agility, stickiness and webs... is simply just not fit to help with this kind of villians. What exactly Dr Strange is doing, when other dimentions are actually his shtick? Where’s Wanda? What about Hulk, Wakandian soldiers (and tech), hey, where’s Rhodey? There was fucking battalion of superheroes at the end of Endgame, but this supposed apocalyptic villian is only fit to fight by 16 years old teenager? Okay.... Well, I get it that it’s a plot point, that there will be no Spider man movie if this plot point didnt exist, but they could have at least designed a villian more fit to make Spider Man’s abilities essential. ANYWAY: Fury decides on this 16 years old and uses tranquliser on his 16 years old friend (which was not creepy and unnecessary at aaaaaall). But then Peter says no (we’ll get to that later) and Fury? Fucking tries to guiltrip him by using Tony. I am so completely livid about it, Fury saying some shit about ‘oh I guess Stark was wrong about you’ TO A KID TONY LOVED, OBVIOUSLY HAD A HIGHEST REAGARD FOR AND NEVER DOUBTED AND WOULD HAVE NEVER FUCKING ASKED SOMETHING LIKE THAT FROM IN THE FIRST PLACE, FUCK YOU. Fury using Tony to make this KID feel bad about himself, reminding Peter about death of his friend and mentor and, yeah, possibly father figure, basically by implying that apparently Tony would have been dissapointed... that shit was low. The fuck. But Peter still says no, so Nick Fury goes and steers a WHOLE BUS OF TEENAGERS TO EPICENTRE OF DANGER. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING MEEEE. If I’ll hear one more WORD about tony kidnapping peter to berlin after this, I’m going to fucking explode.

EDITH: the first ever Tony Stark’s AI that had no emotions. I used to think that it was Friday operating Tony’s glasses, watch and everything, but it’s beside the point: unlike her brothers and sisters, Edith shows no hints of having her own mind, she’s a THING that can be simply transferred to the wrong guy and dont mind it. JARVIS was able to tell that Ultron was hostile, AND when he was hurt and disentegrated he STILL had a mind to protect nuclear codes without being ordered to. Yet Edith is fine with destroying cities, harming people and killing Spider Man. I guess it’s a small point to be peeved with, since she’s artifical, but it sure would have been nice if Edith (created by Tony who LOVED to be prepared for everything) had protocols to prevent her from being used against civilians (AT LEAST be familiar with Spider Man and Peter Parker to NOT shoot him on command) and they would have had to hack her to remove it. But oh well.

What REALLY hurt me about Edith tho, was how easily Peter let the glasses go. It was unexpected and sad and I’d say rather poorely executed. Again, giving up the glasses was a plot point, but the scene itself, it was done in such way that I felt no reluctance from Peter. It was a thing Tony left for him, a parting gift, yet Peter gives it away like it didnt matter, even more so, it felt like he was happy to part with it, phew, thanks god it’s not my burden anymore! Also, Tony was really, really protective of his tech: his suit, his watch, his AIs, his bots, his glasses... all of them were part of him, never intended to be given over to goverment or military or some stranger. He gave Peter those glasses because Peter could use them like Tony did, discreetly, while out of costume, and because he knew that Peter would NEVER use them to harm people. But seeing Peter giving over those glasses to some stranger he met only two days ago, as some kind of sacrifice to not feel bad about not joining Fury’s new superhero team, that left a bad taste in my mouth. So bad, in fact, that I still feel it.

(And while we’re on topic of AI, what about Karen? Where is she? Peter used 3 different types of costumes in this movie (minus black one that wasnt stark tech) and she never said a word. Thats... weird, dissapointing and sad.)

BECK: That piece of shit. Yes, I hated that it was yet another ‘IT’S ALL TONY STARK’S FOULT!’ origin. Just.. how many more villians ranting about how and why they hate tony marvel wants me to endure? Because I honestly lost count by this point. And yeah, movie didnt try to make Tony problematic, yeah, they did not try to make us sympathetic toward Beck, they kept enforcing the idea of Tony being good and selfless superhero Peter should aspire to be, but. I still hated it. I hated that they dragged Tony into it, I hated villains cheering that Tony is now dead, I hated that they used stark tech to destroy cities and harm people, I hated Beck wearing or just touching Edith... I hated it, okay. And people WILL now use this 'tony steals tech!' agenda out of context how they happily blame tony for 'kidnapping and blackmailing' peter, 'trying to kill bucky in cold blood', 'siding with ross and splitting avengers apart', 'creating murderous bot'... it's now out there, even if BARF is obviously property of SI and Beck is obviously a psycho.

PETER: I love Tom Holland’s Peter Parker. I love him, I never stopped. But. But. In homecoming, Peter’s inner tremor of wanting to be of use so badly but not called up or trusted to be of help was a very well executed theme of the movie. Peter had a bravado of I’M NOT A KID, I CAN DO IT! in the first half of the movie, that led him to failing big time on the ferry, to him having this big emotional choice of WHO, IF NOT ME on homecoming night, to declining an Avenger title. It was so so so so so well done emotionally. And I was so ready to cry my soul out in FFH, expecting Peter to have so much inner struggle between wanting to distance himself from superheroing after endgame and wanting to help people and trying to fit in in tony’s shoes and not seeing himself capable of it... I searched for those undertones so much in every scene, but all I really felt was Peter not really wanting to be in this movie at all. He’s a kid! I get it! He’s a kid I love and want to protect, okay! But after 4 movies of knowing Peter Parker who jumped in the MOMENT someone was in danger, it baffled me how reluctant he was to help in FFH, basically forced to do it. We could theoritise about him having trouble coping after endgame all day long, but after IM3, brilliantly showing Tony struggling to cope after traumatic events, FFH did not deliever. They tried, but, it was some bland dialogue and barely any subtlety, just a kid wanting to go on his date, already, can you please ask someone else?

Scene with Happy was good, tho. How Peter goes to him but is scared to trust him at first, how Happy is gentle with him, the talk, the in plane lab, the music. It was good bit, but. It was just small bit.

Another thing I loved was MJ, who was a delight, her scenes were good and pure, and Zendaya did perfect job on portraying her struggles of liking Peter and worrying about him being Spider Man and still not being sure about it and trying to appear indifferent and above it all... she was really great and endearing and her scenes with Peter were lovely. The kiss(es) scene was one of the purest kissing scenes I witnessed in a superhero movie, god bless it.

HOLOGRAMS: They were scary, I guess. They were disorienting and difficult to follow and 100% made to whoa you with 3D effects. But I felt completely detached from feelings that those illusions should have summoned up, because for the most part Peter wore the mask and thus we could not see his face or read his emotions. Ironman zombie was by far most unnecessary bit, I was scared that Beck would use Tony in his illusions, barely breathing whole thing, but then ironman zombie showed up and I actually relaxed, cringing. It was just that, a scene that makes you pull a disgusted face, not touching your emotions at all. Somehow...disappointing. Also... Tony CONSTANTLY used heat signature scanner to check up where civillians and villians were. It's a feature that exist and could have been greatly used against holograms. But oh well.

POST CREDITS SCENE: So Beck was even more shitstain of a person, okay. So his grand plan B was to frame Spider Man, okay. The scene was supposed to make me jump from my seat with WHAAAAT and kickstart thirst for 3rd movie, but... I just stood up and walked straight out of cinema feeling strangely hollow and disappointed. I guess... it wasn't bad movie? I won't try to change the opinion to those who liked it. I look forward to seeing gifs and reading thoughts of those who liked/loved the movie. I might change my mind on some bits. But I waited for this movie so much and in two hours I barely enjoyed maybe about 15 minutes of it and it's something i never expected after adoring homecoming and all the peter scenes in other movies. Maybe it's that they murdered Tony and I lost ability to enjoy marvel movies anymore, maybe it's just that.

(finally, I guess it’s too picky of me to be peeved by this, but science school teenagers coming up with ‘i will always love you’ google search grainy picture tribute video was so anticlimatic it was uncomfortable to watch. There’s nothing hillarious about death of those characters, and it did not lighten the mood at all, it only made me uncomfortable and wrong footed. It’s also not how teenagers novadays make tribute videos.)

#spiderman far from home #far from home #far from home spoilers #spoilers #spiderman spoilers #spiderman #rant galore

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lokbobpop · 3 years

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Forgive

transitive verb. 1 : to cease to feel resentment against (an offender) : pardon forgive one's enemies. 2a : to give up resentment of or claim to requital (see requital sense 1) for forgive an insult. b : to grant relief from payment of forgive a debt.

Forgive” never meant “untie.” The root of “forgive” is the Latin word “perdonare,” meaning “to give completely, without reservation.” (That “perdonare” is also the source of our English “pardon

Forgive for give forge ive for gave for g ive

Writing forgive

I have written this word a million times it feels but of cause i haven’t it just feels that lets say one thousand within my process to life as this is how it is said. ‘I forgive myself for allowing and accepting’ this is it this has changed my whole life as it were by forgiving myself many many times ive actually let go of what it is that has been keeping me down it wa s only myself anchoring me down im pulling up the weight the mind has give me to carry to the burdens i think are real but never was real to be able to let them go so i cant live life fully.

Reading forgive

I first came to know about forgiving myself was after a book i read by a don someone it said to write out al you want to forgive about yourself or another so i did i went under my favorite tree when had now been bulldozes down and lent up against it and write then all out one by one and yes after the were all done i was great i felt lighter better but it wasnt until i found Desteni i really found out what self forgiveness could really do for me it has changed my life it has given me the opportunity to live this life to be the best life i could have to be happy to not be weighed by my mind every little even means something like the bus ride home just now where i old guy was angry at me for not wearing my mask properly so I forgive myself for allowing and accepting the anger to come up with me today on the bus when an elderly man got upset at me for not wearing my mask properly i see now his fear of catching covid was very valid and my refusal was just out of my ego being knocked by i guy i felt had no right to speak to me in that manor and not realizing how selfish and spiteful i was being by not obeying his right to be scared of me with having my mask down low and all my being upset was just ego of how dare you do that to me like who do you think you are talking to me this white women and you are just some old guy you don’t even know me came up within me which is to totally unacceptable i see realize and understand now that i should respect others whether its in fear or not this is there right and i have no place to put them or another in danger.

I think I definitely dont forgive enough i should definitely forgive myself much more than i do its like ok ive go this I understand what i have done wrong so i don’t need to forgive it but i do it just ends the problem better by forgiving it should i say.

How it has been hard to forgive some people like my alcoholic father ive been hanging on to not forgiving him like i think or should i say feel that as i dont do it he will be punished in some why but its not him at all being punished it me punishing myself only by even doing this he has nothing ot to with my hate for him he’s fine where ever he is in life its only me with the problem he’s Scott free as it were lol im missing the point of of freeing myself from him and what he did to me i missing me in this and only see in its him and my blame my blame doesnt hurt him at all no but it hurts me yes it hurts me big time so I forgive myself for allowing and accepting the blame to com up within towards my father for who the was as a parent to wards me and how i blame him for the way i feel now and for many years that the was a bad father yes he was a bad father but who i am within that is whats that matters so im forgiving myself for carrying blame towards him for what i feel he did to my childhood because i did see realize and understand i am exactly the same as him angry pissed off with life and that all i need to have done was take my own responsibility for my own thoughts and feeling towards him to heal me because thats all that is left is thoughts nothing real just thoughts of the past which need not affect me now in any way what so ever.

Well I think i could spend days writing out self forgiveness hey yes maybe i could do a self forgiveness day or just do more as i go along i think this would be better idea.

To forgive is to release your self from yourself your mind which you have come to believe is you

A what i called a mean girl just came to mind she was angry and I forgive myself for allowing and accepting the fear and revenge i have for her and towards her to come up within me as an energy that is is nt real that really i do love her and i see that she is in anger just like me and we were stuck in anger energy I forgive my fear towards her and revenge i held against her.

I forgive myself of so many things in my life all the trial and tribulations i have had that i have inflected to my physical over and over again that i feel sometimes despot works and i can’t see myself heal and think shit why am i not getting better a;l that has got better is one growth under my eye and wanting more things to so within me to feel normal heathy me I forgive myself for allowing and accepting the disappointment within myself right now that ive not done better and have judged myself to be still back of the pack within comparison to others within process that i want I stand gratification as most do now without seeing i need to clear pathways within me to move better and that i am getting there i am doing it and its ok where i am as this is where i am meant to be right here.

Saying forgive

There’s this warmth from the word within me like i forgive me im sorry for what i do and i will learn from what i ahve done wrong to be a the best version of me yes this is a process and im in it.

The thought of having ot forgive people i dont want to forgive because i think they deserve my anger but they no nothing of my anger they feel nothing of my anger so its only myself that suffers hey so why do i do this to myself why would I punish myself when i havent done anything wrong its fucking nuts to even think i do that lol

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to feel down in the dumps right now to see myself as not good enough and putting myself down with my process i will get there i will do this this is but the mind this is not me I couldn’t possibly ever get down this would be a complete impossibility for me as my real self doesn do this get down so it has to be the mind then bringing in a poor me lol Yep hell o mind i will find you hunt you down a kill you lol.

Does this definition support me no and yes a bit of both going on here i could definitely do better than i am doing with my self forgiveness and see where i am living in the mind more often but the more i do the more i will heel im sure of this i need to apply myself and just keep doing it :) go girl

Forgive to give

Forgive

To release my from my mind to be able to live my best life ever

To release mechanism the keys to my upmost freedom and to help others see there potential within themselves.

I will and do use this word to live the best possible life in this my last life on this earth in my physical

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