#its bedtime for me actually but i couldnt sleep because i was too busy crying over the fact that i am never going to get that room back | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

c-rankin93 · 7 years

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SHE'S NO YOU - Ch.4

A/N: So I've decided - (and you will kill me) that I'm not going to combine two chapters together, like I have been doing. For this chapter. I need to leave you guys in suspense sometimes. I'm not going to give any hints away, your just going to have to read it yourself 😂😂 Warning: some characters may get frisky Like always ignore my poor editing skills haha. I only quickly proof read this. ----- CHAPTER FOUR: MISERY LOVES COMPANY ----- RAE POV: *with a dream it begins...* I needed to escape. I had to get out of here. The pictures I was once holding now lay scattered across the hard wood floor. I had to leave, Now. I couldn't stop the tears spill from my eyes, the pain was to much. Is this what dying feels like? "Mommy?" I gasped in fright when I turned to see my little boy stand puzzled before me. His arms wrapped tightly around his spiderman action figure, but I could see the sadness in his eyes. "Mommy what's wrong?" His eyes flickered from the photos that lay around my feet, to my most likely reddened face. I couldn't break, not yet anyway. "Mommy's fine" I breathed. Wiping the evidence off my face and falsifying a smile. Inside I was numb. "Your crying mommy" he stated, taking a small step in my direction. His actions where hesitant, my boy was scared for me. "Mommy's crying because she is so tired from work darling. But as you can see I'm so busy cleaning up the house" I chuckled unhumourouly. "Hey! I have a good idea. How about you, Ruby and mummy take a trip to see Nanna and Grandpa tonight? So Nanna can make me a nice big hot coco to make momma feel better?". His eyes lit up in delight and he nodded vigorously. I didn't like lying to my kids, but how do I explain to them that their father broke their mother heart. Easy, you don't. "Ohkay well you go pack a bag and grab as much clothes as you can alright?" I kissed his cheek then watched his figure run towards the stairs. "Is daddy going to meet us there?" I heard him yell over his shoulder. I couldn't reply, I couldn't tell him I was leaving Finn. Not yet anyway. - Cold sweat mangled my hair, the perfectly applied mascara burnt my eyes through the tears. I had dreamt about that night more times then I could count, but this one felt different. Strangely, I felt like I relived that night all over again. My heart splintering this time. Finn looked so peaceful sleeping in the photo. Did he not feel that next to me? Was he lying everytime he wound his arm tightly around me at night while whispering in my ear, 'never letting go'. He thought I was asleep, but I could never fall asleep without hearing those words first. Wiping my face I growled loudly and got up heading straight for the shower. The kids would be home soon and I couldn't let them nor Finn see me like this. You never show your scars. 15 minutes later I was drying myself off and chucking on some yoga pants and a loose tee. I didn't bother drying my hair, instead I put it in a messy top knot. A few minutes later the door bell dinged, I was excited to see my kids. I hated time apart even if it was a few hours. I happily opened the door and immediately was pushed to the group by my equally excited kids. Kissed were given multiple times. It was a bond I wish lasted til my last breaths. A clearing of the throat startled me momentarily before i turned my gaze towards the open door. He stood tall, still looking impeccable in his designer suit and leather shoes. His hair looking a little more unkempt then usual, and the early signs of stress adorned his face more then usual. He didn't seem like his cocky self, he seemed some what broken inside. 'Broken? Pfftt..' i couldn't help but think bitterly. "Rae" he addressed me with a curt nod. I couldn't help the sensation i felt between my thighs, it was the rumble of his voice, his husky undertone to the word. Or maybe it was the look in his eye, the look that use to make me drop my panties before him 2 seconds flat. "Can i talk to you?" I didn't realize that i had been staring at him until he spoke again. The glint in his eye changed, he was almost amused that i had been caught in the act. Gulping, i stood to my feet and told the kids to head towards their rooms and to get changed into their Pj's, they left without a fuss like usual and i just remained rooted. "I have to tuck the kids in first, um- just come in and take a seat... Ill- uh ill be back". I didn't wait for his reply before i hurried up the steps. Ruby was the first to be tucked under her blankets, i insisted on reading her a bedtime story much to her dismay. You see in the last few weeks she had been explaining to me that 'big girls' don't get read bedtime stories, and I will support it another night when her father isn't down stairs waiting for me. Joshua was quietly reading his book in bed when I came to say goodnight, it was a mere goodnight kiss and a 'see you in the morning' before i was heading towards the stairs, ready to face the demon i currently had in my living room. My steps were slow, i didn't want to talk, i didn't want to hear what he had to say, i had a nagging feeling that it wasnt going to involve the kids. Or maybe, he couldn't take them anymore after school on Tuesday and Thursday? Maybe... just maybe he came to tell me that he was creating a new family with blow up barbie... I saw him standing by my vinyl collection I had had since I was a teenager, thumbing through the different sleeves. He heard me enter the room and turned around. "You still have my Bowie album I see" he smirked, but I completely ignored his comment. "What do you want Finn?" Sighing, he walked over to where I stood, only stopping when our breaths started to mix. I should care that he was invading my space. I should care that he was staring at my lips, but i didn't. All I wanted to do was wrap my arms around body and kiss him til i couldn't breath anymore. God Rae. "What happened?" "What do you mean what happened Finn?" I asked stepping to the left and towards the couch. I need to sit, I needed to separate my starving body from his. "What happened to us? Why did you leave?" "Don't you dare" I suddenly yelled forgetting that the kids laid asleep only a short distance away. "I think you should leave Finn" I went to walk out of the room but he caught my wrist tightly and pulled me towards him. "I loved you with all my fucking heart and you walked... No actually you fucking ran! I did everything for you, I gave you what you wanted and how do you repay me? By taking my kids in the middle of the night whilst i was away on business". 'Sure business he says, hmm...' "You act like I pried every dime you earnt out of your pocket Finn" I spat trying to pull away without any success. "It was the hardest thing to do, walking away from you! It was something I never thought I would be doing, I fucking loved you with all my heart and you broke me... You broke us" I couldnt stop crying by this point, I just let the tears stream down my redned face. "What happened to us?" He repeated his question softly. I could see the hesitation in his eyes when his finger caught a stray tear that was about to drip from my plump lip. My breathing momentarily stopped when I closed my eyes trying to control my emotions. "You... You happened to us" I whispered. I didn't see it coming at first, maybe i was still the foolish girl that fell in love with him, because when i felt his lips on mine after all those years it felt like the world around us stopped moving. Everything i wanted to say vanished, all the pent up aggression i felt for this man- gone. I didn't think twice before returning the kiss just as passionately. His hands grabbed my ass suddenly and before i knew it my legs were securely around his waist. Our kiss was never broken, in fact it had turned more animalistic. The feral beasts within us were out to play, and this time I wasnt holding back. One by one pieces of our clothing fell to the ground. Our tops laid by the lounge room entrance. Our pants on the couch, along with his shoes and socks. My bra landed somewhere near the down stairs bathroom. And my panties were torn from my body the moment my bedroom door slammed shut. My womenhood craved his touch, it screamed for attention but he was too focused on my breasts to notice. He rolled my solid bud between his fingers as he licked and nibbled on the other lavishly. I want to beg him to take me, but the words couldn't be said because I was already moaning. My back landed softly on my bed, with Finn on top of me keeping me down. "Your so beautiful Rae" he mumbled into my stomach as he moved down. Licks and nibbles tickled my soft flesh, coating the skin in a layer of wetness. I was in heaven, I hadn't felt like this in years. My body had never reacted like this way when Gregory ravished me, my body was already tingling its way towards an orgasm and he hadn't even dipped his tongue into my honey. "More..." One solid lick up my slit turned my word on its fucking head, my body hummed with satisfaction. Nibble. Lick. Rub. Eat. He did it all, by the time my orgasm came charging full speed I was grinding my sex into his face. Finn didn't take his eyes off me, not once did I see his eyes close or loose interest. He lapped up the remains of my cum and before having time to think about the next step he plunged into me. "Fuck I've missed this" Finn moaned slamming his stiff girth back into my wetness. Over and over he thrusted harder and harder. I was glad that I had always been flexible, because by the time my second orgasm began to purr my feet were against the head board with his firm grip clutching the back of my thighs. "Fuck babe! I'm almost there... cum babe" he reached down and rubbed my clit in time with his hard thrusts. We exploded together, each other's names on our lips. He didn't pull out until his cock was flacid, he just laid upon me in a sweaty mess. Once our breathing returned back to normal, he pushed himself off me and laid to my left. We had just had sex. I just slept with my ex-husband. I just cheated on my boyfriend. I'm no better then Finn. "This was a mistake!" -- A/N: I don't know how many of you picked up on my slight metaphor. So I'm going to explain. In the TV show Rae physically harms herself with cutting, and hid her scars embarrassed with herself. Well, in this book she never cut herself when she was a teen. Her scars are displayed in her heartache. So she doesn't like to appear broken, even though she is. She hides her 'scars', and instead of showing them she deflects the heartache... maybe that's why she comes across a little bit 'bitchy' when it comes to Finn. And Alot of people are asking why Rae never said anything to Finn well that will be explained... very soon :) @i-dream-of-emus @lily-pop-2 @mmfdfanfic @milllott @hey1tskat1e @arathewallflower @eveerez @I88cym @milymargot

#MMFD #my mad fat diary #fanfic #drama #smut #fan fiction #she's not you #depressed #MMFD fanfic

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