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#like bog witch turns me into a frog kind of thing id be so happy
xamaxenta
·
1 month
Text
Kind of whelmed
#isgh. like i dont try to dwell on it much
#but i really am so incredibly envious of people who have good relationship with their parents
#i havent had a good relationship or trusted mine since i was thirteen
#NC is great its fine im doing great
#but mentally theres a part of me that cant get over it its fucking ass lmao
#an extremely childlike part of me that really needs an older person to tell me its ok???
#i guess?
#dont really have anyone like that
#so i exist as i am and i hold no love for myself and i hold too many expectations
#and im like does this make me happy or accomplished?
#idk
#not really
#not really so why do i have the expectations in the first place
#its a disgusting culmination of identity crisis and lack of self esteem/love idk
#augh.
#i just want to be a little beast
#like bog witch turns me into a frog kind of thing id be so happy
#maybe
#anyway thats dramatic its nothing important
#ill put it away and think about it again in like four months time
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