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#like yes. i can be more clear with my intentions. i'm generally not the greatest at that. but my baseline that i want to
slippery-minghus · 24 days
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hmm. had an actual conversation with nightmare coworker today that seemed mutually productive. she apologized for saying some bullshit that hurt my feelings and i clarified that my intentions are to help not to undermine her, and we both agreed that there's no competition against each other and that it's the lack of growth in our role that's the problem. it was...productive.
and further cementing for me that it is time to begin making my Exit. i will be sending out my resume to a few places this weekend.
i'm still processing the conversation, and am struggling to place myself in where i am responsible to better my behavior. because i genuinely don't want to be an ass, even though i really don't like this lady and will jump for joy the day i never have to see her again. she stated that she knows my intentions aren't to hurt her, and that she thinks i'm very kind. i apologized for if my behavior came off as undermining her, and said that my intentions are only to better my own growth—and that i know she's trying to succeed too. i validated her feelings, and complemented the effort she is putting in.
where i'm struggling with is: am i in the wrong/causing harm and needing to change if the issue is that her feelings are incongruent with what she knows of my intentions? her feelings are her responsibility (WOW i almost typed "her feelings are my responsibility". i feel like that's a freudian slip) and she states that she knows i don't mean to hurt her. i'm going to try to be more clear in wording my intentions with her (she feels like me trying to take work off her plate is to undermine her. when really, i'm caught up and see her getting overwhelmed, and i want to help and also have something to do since i'm bored).
but i'm really struggling to look at my role in this and pass judgement on myself. i can and want to do better, and i don't think i did anything wrong, but i'm always so hesitant to say it's not my fault or i didn't do something bad. like i can't trust my judgement on that. my intentions were good, her bad feelings are ones caused by her insecurities, which she more or less has expressed to be aware that they are not true—the hurtful thing she said to me, she acknowledged was said out of hurt and not what she actually thinks. so, is it fair to say i'm not the bad guy? i'm not in the wrong? i know good intentions that still result in harm don't absolve anyone, but when the things that are clashing are insufficient communication and reactive insecurities... i'm not a monster, am i?
#well. i AM probably a monster for how much i dislike this lady#but i don't ACT on it#and i genuinely couldn't care less about her. i participate in decent human pleasantries because i am a decent human.#and at work we're stuck together#the thing that's irked me so much about this conversation is just.. her self centeredness#that she thinks everyone is out to get her. to undermine her. whatever.#bitch nobody cares about you enough one way or the other to put in that kind of effort. i sure don't#i empathize but i do not sympathize. to feel that pit that makes you feel like the worst kind of center of attention#i get it. but genuinely you are not the main character and no one is going to spend their limited time and energy to slowly attack you#you are not the cat with all the knives pointed at it#it's a terrible feeling to feel like you are! but when it influences your behavior to the point that you are making snide comments#to people who have no option not to interact with you then uh. then you're in the wrong buddy#and the people around you (who cannot easily leave! bc work!) should not have to bend over backwards to assure you#that they're not pointing knives at you. to protect themselves from your feelings making you say mean shit#like yes. i can be more clear with my intentions. i'm generally not the greatest at that. but my baseline that i want to#modify my behavior from is NOT one that a regular well adjusted person would take as anything but kind#and if a regular well adjusted person got a little offput by me volunteering to take work off their hands we would've had a very chill#3 sentence conversation about it MONTHS AGO.#i understand and respect (even if i find it annoying and overbearing) the need for me to announce my intentions like im working in a kitchen#and saying 'hot water' or 'knife' as i move around other people but we shouldn't have reached this conclusion this way#and frankly who's to fucking say me being more clear with my intentions will only feed the flames of her thinking i'm out to get her!#'i caught up on my stuff and your plate looks full. i'm bored. anything i can do to help?' could be a pointed knife for all i know!!#and if it is- and my actions still hurt her in that scenario- am i still responsible for the hurt caused??#like WHERE DOES IT FUCKING E N D ?#personal#*exhales* okay i feel better now#i just hate talking about my interactions with her bc i just want NOTHING to do with it. i want her out of my head!!#but until i process it i can't let go#and i'm still going to have to go over all of this with my shrink tomorrow#it just makes me mad how much of my time this bitch takes up. i'm not getting paid to think about work right now!!!!
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dearweirdme · 7 months
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https://www.tumblr.com/dearweirdme/731352149637873664/for-some-reason-the-bangtan-bomb-of-their-grammy?source=share
I love this moment, not only for the Taekook but also because it also highlights one of my favourite, underrated relationships between V and Namjoon.
Looking at this, you wouldn't think there was only a year or so age difference between them. There's also not that much difference between them in terms of height and build yet look how young and small Taehyung looks sat next to Namjoon and this really spotlights what Namjoon meant when he said he took care of Taehyung in particular.
This also, inadvertently, reinforces my belief in Taekook. Because look how close Taehyung and Namjoon are at some points. Taehyung is leaning into him in parts and they are shoulder to shoulder touching in parts yet there's still a certain level of deference from Taehyung to Namjoon. There's a natural inequality between them, from Namjoon viewing Tae as someone smaller, more vulnerable who he feels a need to protect and Taehyung happily leaning into that role.
They are physically close, clearly very comfortable in each other's personal space yet there is still very much a sense of boundary and respect for that space that couples tend to drop as they become more intrusive of each others personal space. Taehyung and Jungkook have no respect for each others personal space and they show no discomfort over that fact either. This supports, to me, a opinion that they are much more used to being in such close proximity to each other that it's become second nature for them to consider the space between them shared (and this is something that is not platonic in nature. I think the only platonic relationship you could apply this to is twins)
Even with Vm!n, as touchy and physically comfortable as they are in each other's spaces, there's still a sense that it's their own individual space; that there's a conscious acknowledgement when the other crosses the boundary and enters their space, even if it's clear that they generally don't have a problem with it or feel uncomfortable with it. Jimin is probably the only other member who so effortlessly intrudes upon Taehyung's personal space the same way Jungkook does and vice versa but even then, there's a line. That's because couples know each other intimately and physically in a way that even best friends or platonic soulmates don't.
And for the j!kookers because I know you like to lurk here, there are far more moments of JK asserting his boundaries with Jimin than he ever does with Taehyung. Yes, Jimin likes to PLAYFULLY toe the line of those boundaries, which I think is what might be confusing you all, but you can also see those moments when Jimin recognises the line and pulls back. You can also see how much more comfortable JK is initiating those interactions than he is receiving them. Their touchiness is cute but it's still lacking the give and take that occurs naturally in romantic relationships. That's because those interactions between them are far more intentional than unintentional.
You also see this at play with Namjoon and Jimin too. They get really close but that closeness is much more conscious than what is happening between Taehyung and Jungkook.
I often say that the greatest tell is always the group themselves because out of all the different and similar dynamics, Jungkook and Taehyung's sticks out like a sore thumb. The group and their close relationships with each other give us a perfect reference and comparison point to see how certain things don't quite line up with others and the interactions between Taehyung and Jungkook just don't line up with the rest of the group. They just don't. We have two strong, close age relationships to run the side by sides in Vm!n and J!kook (I'm only censoring not to bring unwanted eyes to your page, btw, not because I have a problem with either ship itself) we know how Taehyung and Jungkook act around their best and closest friends and yet, it's different between them.
And I know part of the media play is that they're not close or they're distant yet that can't be the reason for their different dynamic because one of the things that sticks out about them most is how much they come across as physically inseparable compared to the rest of the group.
Now, I don't know about some of their detractors but I know that when I feel distant or not close to people, those feelings show physically. I feel driven to get away from them and put physical distance between us---not to get closer to them.
There's been a lot of discourse lately about how Taekook is singled out and almost treated as a taboo compared to other ships and I do think that's true but I think that's because we naturally recognise body language and we pick up on signals instinctively and I think people are picking up on those differences, they're drawing those comparisons and they're seeing what does and doesn't line up and what they are finding--either consciously or subconsciously is making them feel uncomfortable.
Nobody can know for sure. They could all be master manipulators and Oscar caliber actors for all we know but I think there is far much support in what we do know that points to Taekook as a possible couple.
Hi anon!
Beautifully laid out! Absolutely agree!
Tae and Jk are so used to being close and touchy that there’s moments where they (mostly Jk, since Tae is the most tactile) don’t even react to the other touching them. It’s normal, it’s familiar, it’s automatic, it’s a level of comfort they don’t have with others.
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karnaca78 · 11 months
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I'm looking forward to see your exploration of the Dishonored scientific lore! Roseburrow's an intriguing soul, considering he had his best intentions, had difficult time and lived in poverty and then... he's famous innovator with guilt conscience. I see your Esmond on the edge of the discovery - not yet enough resources and support, but he feels he might soon bring great changes in the society. Any natural philosopher is remarkable, the developers really made the game's lore worth of interest, Sokolov from the first Dishonored is my absolute favorite. Renaissance man with many talents and complex character. Perhaps, Dr. Galvani is another interesting scientist. He's as well passionate about his work; marks the day he had a conversation with Sokolov as the greatest day in his entire lifetime; once was Granny Rags' doctor; studied the rat plague, kept a bunch of rats in his house for that case (there was an incident which resulted with a severed arm that can be found near the rat pantry); he can be robbed by the protagonist at least thrice after which he becomes understandably paranoid (I also loved his notes, he seems like an ardent man, maybe choleric). I even find some similarities with Piero. I'm curious what people imagine him look like. Oh, and you can think of the parallels with scientists from the real world! I'm certain there's a lot. P.s. I have no idea if I made any spelling mistakes, but I hope my rant is somehow coherent. I wish you luck :)
Hello! First and foremost, I thank you kindly for your interest and your support, it's very much appreciated!! :)
Your message is very interesting, and there's a lot to say about all of these scientists.
Starting with Roseburrow, I think that's an unjustly forgotten character. Probably because we barely hear of him at all in the games, and not everyone has seen the beautiful Tales of Dunwall shorts. But without his breakthrough, who knows what the Empire would have looked like at the time of Corvo and Emily's story? He's a truly pivotal figure and I think it right to pay him tribute somehow. So yes, I wanted to depict him as he was in his younger years; idealistic, full of good intentions and gifted with a true belief in science despite the hardships thrown his way.
Sokolov, too, is a man of many faces! By 1837 and the Rat Plague outbreak, he has completely eclipsed Roseburrow (whose death is still recent!) with his deadly contributions to natural philosophy. On the other hand, he is the Royal Physician and an accomplished artist. Although his methods aren't always the most commendable, he's also a fascinating character.
As for Galvani! That's a good idea. I don't envision him as a genius, and not really as a pivotal scientist in the grand scheme of things, but I agree that his works and his character in general are very interesting too. He's a bit of a shape-shifter as far as I'm concerned: almost menacing in Dishonored, because his apartment anx experiments are honestly very creepy; less so in Dishonored 2, where robbing him is played more as comic relief and there isn't a mission that features him extensively like in the previous game. Representing him would be an interesting challenge, so thank you for the idea!
Researching real scientists and their artistic representations is also a great inspiration, of course! It's pretty clear that Sokolov is heavily inspired by Da Vinci, whereas Jindosh is something of an "evil" rendition of Nikola Tesla. Hypatia, too, is named after a very real Greek philosopher! I'm not sure about the others, but perhaps someone else can provide insight on them.
Forgive me for rambling! I'm very happy to share my thoughts on Dishonored lore and your contribution is very thought-provoking.
Thank you again for your message and have a great day! :)
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yourfinalbow · 3 years
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hi lol this is totally random but based on a harry potter post you just reblogged and you can completely ignore me if you want, but do you think snape deserved better, or are you a quote unquote "snape apologist"? I'm genuinely curious cuz I've come across a lot of different opinions on severus. Again, feel free to ignore :)
This ended up way longer than it needed to be, and I apologize for that lmao.
Hi! Hmmm I have many mixed opinions on this. First we have to talk about which Snape. Book!Snape is actually kind of an asshole, and not in the fun way. (Way more than I remembered.) But but but Alan Rickman!Snape I like a lot.
And no I'm not mentioning Snape from TCC. That was not Snape and that world was not Harry Potter.
Snape is an interesting character because of how flawed and layered he is.
(Putting a cut because it's so long, and tw for non-detailed mentions/reference to abuse, as well as both trauma and death.)
He wasn't born in a very good household, which I can definitely see as being a reason for why he is who he is. (A reason, not an excuse. Those are two extremely different things.) You look at Sirius, who also came from a horrible household, yet he managed to dig himself out of the mud and make his own path for himself. (Though I have many angsty headcanons for the thoughts he has and being afraid of what he will do and in turn his own mind. WolfStar solidarity. Neither one of them know what they are truly capable of, and both are completely afraid to find out.
Ahem sorry I got a little distracted there.
During the Marauder's era, Snape wasn't a good person in general, but he tried to be nice to Lily. (One of the only exceptions he made.) That being said, (sorry, going on a tangent again), it does not excuse what the Marauders did. As much as they are, in my humble opinion, JK's greatest creation, they should be held accountable for both the prank, and dangling Snape upside down. (Though Remus does make a few good points in their defense later, it's still not an excuse.) Two wrongs never make a right.
Snape doesn't deny Lily's claims at him wanting to join a supremacy group, nor does he say he isn't friends with Death Eaters.
It's clear through the flashbacks we're given that Snape is apathetic in the face of innocent people dying, but once again Lily is the exception.
Dumbledore defends Snape by saying it wasn't his fault that Harry's parents are dead. I actually semi-agree with this. On one hand, he was directly at fault, but on the other hand he had no way of knowing. As a severe Loki apologist, I do not blame Loki for Frigga's death. He may have led the dark elves to her, but he didn't know it was her she was sending them to. That's the comparison I make in my mind, and so I don't completely blame him like other people do. (One could also make the argument that Sirius is to blame. Sirius, who is 100% my favorite character in the entire franchise, gave the secret keeper job to Peter, thinking it would be safer with him. However, he had no ill will or malicious intentions towards Lily, James, and Harry, so I don't blame him.)
All that being said, Snape not only would have been fine with random people dying, he also didn't care whether or not James and Harry lived.
For context:
(Dumbledore is speaking, right after Snape comes to him for help.)
"You do not care, then, about the deaths of her husband and child?" They can die, as long as you have what you want?"
Snape said nothing, but merely looked up at Dumbledore.
He has a strange relationship with Lily. He obviously loves her, but not enough to want to stop Voldemort from killing the two things that bring her the most amount of happiness. It's clear he doesn't care about anyone except for Lily. Which on some level, I can understand why. When people have traumatic childhoods, they tend to hold on to a person that was there for them. Sometimes it can be the hands of the person who caused them pain in the first place, but other times it is another person who was there for him. He holds Lily's opinions of himself higher than anybody else, and he holds Lily above anybody else, and I think this can be attributed to some sort of trauma response, which is why his love for her is so unusual. That doesn't mean I think he should be fine with killing innocent people.
On the topic of trauma, I think joining the Death Eaters was another response to this, as well as a result of what kind of family he had.
Similar to both Harry and Voldemort, Snape much preferred Hogwarts to where he lived, and such the castle became his home more than his house ever was.
The Death Eaters could offer him something he had never been offered before. He belonged to something. In his own, twisted, traumatic mindset, he might have even almost seen the Death Eaters as a family. Not consciously of course, but there was definitely a feeling of belonging they gave him.
And there's something to be said about the fact that many serial killers in real life come from an abusive family. I don't pretend to understand the minds of someone who can do something so vile, but I have watched enough Criminal Minds episodes to know what they long for is control.
So being apart of this supremacy group, even though he was a half-blood himself and undoubtedly didn't entirely share Voldermort's racist beliefs, gave him both control and something he belonged to.
It's not an excuse, but it's a reason.
Alternatively, you can look at it through a quote from the most recent episode of Loki.
"It's part of the illusion. It's a cruel, elaborate trick conjured by the weak to inspire fear."
So it's also possible that when he was a kid, he thought being a villain was the only way to prevent others from being one to him.
Ok sorry, back on the chronological track.
So he agrees to change sides and work with Dumbledore. (Who must see just how distraught Snape was over Lily's death, to trust him immediately.)
Snape spends most of Harry's time at Hogwarts humiliating his own students. He particularly calls out Harry and his friends a lot, but I can definitely see this being a defence mechanism. He assumes Harry is James and reverts back to what we talked about earlier. (Becoming the villain so nobody else has a chance.)
But but but, he does a lot of good throughout the books. Snape mutters the countercurse, saving Harry from Quirrell during the Quidditch match. He then actually referees at the next match, preventing anything from happening altogether.
In retrospective, we see that he spends most of the first book helping Dumbledore by protecting the stone, and helping Lily by protecting Harry.
Now I could go through and list the goods and the bads of Snape throughout the entire series, but I have neither the time nor the patience, and I think you get the point.
(Except I would like the mention that Snape becomes a double agent for Dumbledore in book four, and risks his life every single day by constantly betraying Voldermort, and never once does he use this as a way to double cross Dumbledore. This was actually probably really hard on him. You can assume that having to pretend to be a Death Eater means he had to do some despicable things just so he didn't blow his cover. If he really has changed by this time, which I would like to think he has, is a lot of added guilt to live with.)
(I would also mention that he tried to save Sirius in book five, but... *falls on floor dramatically* I don't want to think about it.)
Severus Snape's time comes to the end in book seven. At the hands of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, his death is a valiant act of sacrifice. Protecting the living and defending the honour of the fallen.
So, he has done a lot of bad in his lifetime, but by the time we as readers get to know him, his fundamental set of beliefs have begun to change. Through the eyes of what started as an eleven year old boy, you can definitely see that even after this he wasn't necessarily a good person.
And that's because his good is behind the scenes. He's good on a larger scale. He's chosen the light over darkness, but in his everyday life he's still the scared, traumatized little kid he's always been.
And him being this way has reasons, but these reasons are not excuses.
Sorry anon, this kind of turned into a long winded review of the entire character. I know that's not really what you asked, so I'll sum it up in a final few sentences sentence.
Yes. I wish Snape had gotten to live. Not because I'm necessarily a "Snape apologist", but because I find his character interesting, and seeing his reaction to his sacrifice could have been a really good read. Also Harry coming up and thanking him would have been really touching, and as a cherry on top maybe we could have gotten to read Harry apologizing for his father. Maybe even Snape sharing memories of Lily?! (Sorry that might have gotten a little to fanfic-y.)
That being said, his death being a final sacrifice towards the good of everyone, and a final testimony to his change of heart, was -- and I'll give JK credit just this once -- good storytelling, and a good way to end it.
Also I like movie!Snape because fuck yeah he's just so awesome.
If anyone has anything to add/take away, or they just want to discuss the wonder that was Alan Rickman, let me know! (Ask/Comment/Reblog/Etc.)
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peachriffer · 5 years
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Review: Logic - Confessions of a Dangerous Mind
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On his fourth album, Logic proves himself to a rapper but fails to be an artist.
Confessions isn't as conceptual as Logic's previous two efforts and that isn't necessarily a bad thing because Logic's concepts don't tend to be fully fleshed out anyway. The Incredible True Story features skits that don't tie into the songs at all and Everybody attempts to be more topical but fails because Logic only really knows how to rap about himself or how he's biracial or something to that effect. It's hard to understand the creative decisions that led to Logic making Confessions of a Dangerous Mind and why it's so disappointing without some context first so let's get that out of the way now...
Let me be clear: Logic is an incredible rapper. He's technically proficient, his vocals are easy on the ears, he's likable, charismatic, and expressive. He can sing (unlike most rappers who believe they can sing). He has always shown incredible potential but, in the years since the release of his debut, Under Pressure, he's failed to capitalize on that potential artistically. He borrows his style from his contemporaries, namely Drake, Kendrick Lamar, Kanye West, and Eminem. This is fine on it's face. It's okay to have influences but Logic tended to take this a little far. Under Pressure saw Logic wearing his influences on his sleeve to the point where I half expected to hear Kendrick's 'Sing About Me' refrain on the title track. Still though, I was optimistic about where Logic's career would take him, especially since he was so great at emulating other artists so early on.
The Incredible True Story brought us more of the same but also carried with it some of the best beats Logic would ever rap on in my opinion. Not only this but the album also brought with it a space theme that completely failed to tie into what Logic was even rapping about. Overall it was fine but it wasn't Logic's masterpiece yet. He still needed to develop into his own voice, sharpen his focus, and deliver a unique perspective on more topical things. I could sense a masterpiece in him. All of the pieces were there, this just wasn't the right time yet.
Then we had Everybody, another concept album and another failure to quite hit the mark. This album brought with it Logic's signature 1-800 Suicide Prevention song, a track with a solid message that would be dumb to argue against. Aside from that however most of the tracklist is loaded with duds and the messaging is inconsistent. This wasn't the masterpiece fans had been clambering for quite yet.
This finally brings us back around to the subject of this review, Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, and why it's such a failure overall.
First off, after listening to this thing I struggle to understand why this album is titled "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind" because Logic isn't confessing to anything, he isn't dangerous, nor is the album thought out well enough to have a 'mind' behind it at all. The project's title is irrelevant to the content of the record and was seemingly just tacked on because it sounded interesting or something. The Incredible True Story suffered from the same problem too as the Story it tells wasn't Incredible nor was it true.
Titles aside though, Logic's Confessions of a Dangerous Mind is terrible from start to finish. Individually the tracks aren't so bad but, when listened to all at once, I struggle to see how anyone could believe they'd made a cohesive album.
The title track kicks us off and carries little weight. Logic occasionally reaches to make a point but never does. He talks about things and makes observations that are fairly rudimentary about himself, his culture, and caring for one's self. And that's it. The track just leads to nothing substantial and continues to the next track. The dissatisfaction is overwhelming.
Homicide with Eminem is a major highlight for me, even if it's an isolated one. Eminem handles himself surprisingly well considering his abysmal output as of late too. The track introduces itself with Logic's father joking that his son is the greatest alive because he came out of his balls. Not only is this not funny but it doesn't connect to anything else in the song at all. Over the course of the song nothing notable in particular is said. This circles back to one of my core problems with Logic as a performer. He raps well but overwhelmingly finds himself without anything to talk about. He struggles to stay on topic for longer than two or three bars before changing the subject or providing a throw away line that carries no weight. Every word is low impact because each line is just filler to fill time until the next track where you could responsibly expect more filler.
On the off hand, however, when Logic does manage to say something consequential, the line usually borders on questionable to downright inappropriate. Take for instance the track 'Pardon My Ego' where Logic wishes he could have bipolar disorder so he could make an album as genius as Kanye's Ye. I could rant about this line forever. This is ridiculous on it's face and Logic's intention with the statement is unclear. He should understand having bipolar disorder won't help him to make better music but says the line anyway. He's weirdly complimenting Kanye but gives credit to his disorder for the success of the album. The two aren't necessarily related. Sure, Ye is, in part, about kanye's struggle with mental illness and how these experiences helped to form him into the man he is today. Though it's important to point out that Ye is more about Kanye prevailing despite the illness and not about how his mental illness helps him to make great albums. This point seems totally lost on Logic who seems to believe that mental illnesses are somehow like the real life equivalent to superpowers and that, if you're just mentally fucked up enough, you too could be a creative genius. This is a huge misconception.
This segways nicely into another thing that rubs me the wrong way about Confessions of a Dangerous Mind. It's an amalgamation of several ongoing tropes in hip-hop right now:
- Illusions to being different, being politically conscious, or woke.
- rapping about bitches, money, drugs, or being better than everyone else.
- Society being bad or expecting you to act a certain way.
- Social Media is addictive and is something you should ignore.
- Logic is 'killin' the game. He's a 'game changer'. He's a self-proclaimed Genius. He's biracial. He's this. He's that.
It's all just noise at this point and, truthfully, I no longer believe that Logic has the same potential to create the masterpiece I once believed he would. His latest album isn't about anything in particular. The tracklist could be ordered in any way and carry the same weight, which is next to none.
On the upside, the beats are well-produced and Logic is a proficient rapper. He sounds great over these instrumentals but this is about all the credit I can give the album before checking out completely. Nothing of substance ever happens on Confessions. Logic never has a topic and seems to just spit whatever he wants to in that moment. The best line he manages on this album is: "Scarecrow Flow, I'm outstanding in my field". It's a stroke of brilliance that never manifests itself again on Confessions.
Overall, the more I listen to the album, the more I struggle to find it's appeal outside of just being background music. The whole album is filler, loaded with Hip-hop's most rudimentary tropes and tracks that take up space rather than generate interest. There's no artistic vision to be found here, no plan, no surprises, no concept. The whole album just feels empty, without tension, conflict, purpose, a driving force behind it's creation, or anything to provide appeal or intrigue at all. Logic lacks depth of character and has nothing interesting to say. No new perspective or anything even remotely noteworthy to tell his listeners. Why was this album made? The answer to that question still eludes me and, for that reason, Confessions of a Dangerous Mind is one of the worst, most uneventful hip-hop albums I've ever heard. I definitely recommend you sit this one out even if you kind of liked Logic's music up until this point. His charm is just non-existent on this project.
Highs: Homicide, Mama/Show Love
Lows: Pardon My Ego, The Title Track, Commando, Icy, BOBBY
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dramayeoja · 6 years
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Goblin ❣︎ 도깨비
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Kim Shin, an undefeated war general, is ultimately killed by a jealous young king named Wang Yeo. After death, Shin is revived by the gods—but his revival is by no means miraculous. He becomes a 도깨비 (dokkaebi, goblin), and is cursed. He will have to pay for all the lives he took in battle by living alone in immortality, witnessing everyone he's ever loved, die. Remaining lodged in his chest is the very sword that killed him. There is only person who can see that sword, and draw from his heart so that he can finally rest in peace: his bride... whom he's yet to meet.
Things get spoilery under the cut—you've been warned! ;)
Chipper, yeah? Haha so, right off the bat, the premises of Goblin remind me of like, a much more morbid version of the legend of King Arthur. You know, a man draws a sword from stone to prove himself the greatest king in all of Britain? Yeah. Just to be clear: this is a good thing (imo). Like, I personally think this is just such a cool idea for a drama 😍
Let's jump right in. I'm gonna be honest and say that, at first, I felt a little turned off at the female lead, Eun Tak, being nineteen (in the beginning of the show), meanwhile the male lead, Shin, is 900+ years old (but physically looks to be in his thirties). It just... rubbed me weird. But hey, the Twilight series (both the books and the movies) is exactly the same—high school girl, century-old man, bananas yet somehow romantic storyline... And I loved me some Twilight as a young adult. So I mean, I have no right to judge, really. Plus, Eun Tak soon turns twenty anyway. So that's an improvement I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️ We follow her character into her late twenties, nearly thirty. So things are definitely fine by then haha! 👍
Don't let that previous bit make you think I didn't enjoy Goblin—I LOVED it. That detail is just a lil funky to me, is all. Back during my Twilight obsession days, I was nearly twenty myself, and the thought of being pursued by an older man was exciting. Hell, I mean, it still is! But now that I'm two years shy of my 30th Birthday, I feel differently sometimes. I think, LAWD get that girl away from that man, she too young for him LOL. I am definitely getting old... Enough about Twilight now, apologies! I'm only using it for the sake of conveying similarities seen in Goblin 🙏 Let's talk cast!
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Kim Go Eun as Ji Eun Tak and Gong Yoo as Kim Shin
Eun Tak is a bubbly young woman with limitless energy! While still in her mother's womb, Mama Ji was involved in a hit-and-run incident which, sadly, took her life. During Mama Ji's dying moments, she prayed to anyone above that her child's life be spared. Sat on a rooftop from afar, beer in hand (lol), Shin hears her prayers, as he is a god of sorts. He appears before Mama Ji, and shows mercy to her unborn baby. Eun Tak grows up with the ability to see/speak to ghosts. Said ghosts tell her constantly that she is the goblin's bride. How do they know? A strange birthmark on the back of Eun Tak's neck tips them off. Eun Tak unfortunately was taken in by her abusive bitch of an aunt, who jabs Eun Tak every chance she gets. Her cousins are assholes. Eun Tak's aunt really only keeps her around in hopes of collecting Mama Ji's savings (intended for Eun Tak) one day. Sad, right? I mean, isn't Eun Tak being born without her mother enough as it is? Life can be so cruel 😔
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Lee Dong Wook as Grim Reaper/Reaper/Wang Yeo
This is Grim Reaper (or Reaper for short), portrayed by the handsome Lee Dong Wook. His character is just this strange, not at all tech-savvy man with a constant deadpan facial expression. Said facial expression provokes so many giggles during funny moments, and drives home the longing and desperation during sad times. We learn quite a ways in that he, in his previous life (again, just in case: spoiler), was Wang Yeo G A S P ! The young king that is essentially responsible for Shin's death, as well as all the misdeeds that were done to Shin's family. Again, this is something I don't want to spoil. Well, more, anyway 😆 You gotta see it!
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Yoo In Na as Kim Sun/Sunny
Kim Sun, or simply, Sunny (she loves to spell her name for people lol, S-U-N-N-Y!) is the second female lead. Yoo In Na is so gorgeous that one look at her makes you feel like such a potato hahhah. 🥔 This fact about her beauty bleeds over into the show itself—every time another character meets Sunny, the camera does this slow motion pan into her lmao. She really is that pretty! Sunny's personality comes across so odd at first... Having watched all of the episodes now, I feel the intention of Goblin's creators was to make her seem like a soul searching for something it has lost in a previous life. idk if that makes sense, but yeah. She has this way about her, like she's disconnected from others, and is sifting through the haziness to find this thing she feels she's lost.
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Yook Sungjae (my BtoB bias 😍) as Yoo Deok Hwa
Sungjaeeee ahhhh 💘💘💘 I had to gush, sorry! Hehe. Meet Deok Hwa: unofficial nephew of Shin. Deok Hwa is a third-generation chaebol (heir to a family-owned corporation) and spoiled man-child, always seeking his credit card hahaha 🤣 But I love him so much. Between Gong Yoo, Lee Dong Wook, and BtoB Sungjae? Man, I'm dying over here! Deok Hwa's true identity is revealed later in the show, which if you haven't seen it yet, I won't spoil it. Just watch. But his ending sucked. Like where did he go? Everyone else's endings got tied up neatly except for his. What gives, man? 🤔 Edit: I was actually reading an online conversation about what happened to Deok Hwa online—someone jokingly said he was reincarnated as BtoB Sungjae LOL 💯
Other various comments
AMAZING OST 😍😍😍
Good pace, episodes drag at times. A little confusing in the beginning, but you get there eventually. Maybe this is just me though, viewers who are a little more keen than I will likely catch on sooner ;) My mom was a little confused as well, and actually said at one point, "This should be called the 'what-the-hell-is-going-on' show," hahaha. Like I said though, we quickly moved on from this, and loved all the things. There are actually, I think, three (?) specials that were made to aid viewers in making sure they understand the complex events and relationships clearly. I haven't watched them yet, but want to!
Quite repetitive tbh, as there are unnecessary flashbacks often. Probably for two reasons: the obvious of reminding you what's what, but also to create suspense. Typical duration of most tvN dramas seems to be about 16 episodes, so it's possible these flashbacks and things are, for lack of a better word, filler. I don't know how rigid or lax tvN is about having a drama set at 16 eps, but I get the idea this is their preference. Seeing as so many of their programs on average last that long, I feel this must be what they want. Such has the potential to affect the writing, either positively or negatively.
A continuation of the previous bullet: I think Goblin's creators oversimplified the plot at times. I'm unsure if this is due to possible pressures to meet a specific requirement(s), or what. I'd rather forgo ALL restrictions and let creativity flow, let the story be told without pressure to fill a specific amount of time, etc. but TV production is weird. And contracts are weird. tvN might not to blame for these issues, could simply be that storytelling isn't always easy, man. I'm a writer myself, it's hard! I'M being redundant now lmfao! Anyway, yeah ~
Absolutely LOVED all the scenes that were filmed on location in beautiful Québec City, Canada 🍁 Tall, romantic trees, the fall foliage, historic buildings... sigh. Now all I need is Gong Yoo chasing me and we're all set! ;D
In addition to Shin being revived, my crush on Gong Yoo has been revived as well LOL. He fine 🔥 A classic K drama crush, can't go wrong with GY👌
Gong Yoo is always stellar at doing kiseu (kiss) scenes, and in Goblin, he does not disappoint. He really goes at it 🙈 which is preferred vs. the typical person kissing a stone statue that you see so often. He even did a lift kiss with Kim Go Eun that was reminiscent of THEE Coffee Prince kiss he did with actress Yoon Eun Hye! 😍
I never saw it coming, how the sword would wind up being removed from Shin's chest. I worried what the writers were going to do, how would they approach this, and just wow. The way things turned out is such a relief. It also told me that Shin's love for Eun Tak is true. I mean, I didn't need that scene to occur for me to know that, rather it just adds extra oomph that yes, Shin really does love Eun Tak. He didn't want her to suffer knowing she was responsible for his "death," so he thought quick and used her hands WITH his hands asdfghjkl. How dumb (bc noooo now you're gonna die) and amazing he is at the same time 💜
I love how Shin made his way back to Eun Tak after passing away, it was such a powerful scene. I could really feel his struggle, and kept yelling at my TV for him to stand up lol!
Devastated that Eun Tak died 😭 I really thought as many times as she'd cheated death before, she would somehow continue cheating death again and again for the rest of her days. But no... What a selfless person, Ji Eun Tak. Her being reincarnated as Park So Min gave me some closure. Not the closure I wanted, but closure.
The relationship between Shin and Reaper is ADORABLE. Whenever they interact with each other, they just have this great dialogue. Shin pings, Reaper pongs, Reaper pings, Shin pongs. It's great 😄 I still laugh about the slow-mo scene of them returning from the market with green onions HAHAHA 😂
I love Sunny & Reaper ~ However, their history as Kim Sun & Wang Yeo in their past lives is so very sad. I don't even know where to start RE: my feelings on this 💔 imo, their ending kinda sucked. I just wasn't satisfied with them having had this complicated, tragic story, only to be reincarnated in this fashion that I ultimately found to be just... idk, disappointing 😩 Again, closure, but not the closure I wanted.
I thought Reaper, the other grim reapers, the name cards, the depiction of what happens immediately following death with the brewing of the tea, the afterlife, etc. was all very creative. We really don't know what awaits us when our time comes—it's interesting to wonder if it's anything like it is in Goblin 🍵
Can't stop thinking about Goblin, even though I'm now watching Thirty but Seventeen & Mr. Sunshine! I'm emotionally cheating lol halp.
Photo credits: tvN & AsianWiki
Yo yo! I'm sorry I took so long to watch + write up this review! It's been a long couple of weeks for me, I wasn't always able to watch when I wanted. It was maddening 😆 But I have finally watched, and feel like the most accomplished person on the planet hahaha. xoxo 💜
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agent-85 · 7 years
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Thank you, Mary:) 1. This time the writing is good - strong storytelling and interesting concept, encouraging a deep philosophical debate and a social commentary. Brilliant acting, I like so much scientifically sceptical Jemma:), the hero Mace and good dad Mack. I'm not convinced about May's story and even more Fit'z change. Maybe it's exhausted part of myself who speek, but until now and what we know, it's not so clear, but they weren't brainwashed?, programmed to forget who they are?
2. and … Framework Fitz is a sadist. Framework could be interpreted as a “reality” where people can discover their potential without the limitations of their past/limitations in the real world (Mace). The writers maintain the interpretation that a minor event can completely reverse the course of our lives and that different experiences can change us to unrecognizable version of ourselves. I don’t know, I just feel like they just switched Ward and Fitz. It’s like Fitz had Doctor in him.
3. For Fitz with his vulnerability it’ll be like his worst nightmare. And until now I don’t seem to find “the truth behind Fitz’s turn” as convincing explanation that he’s a monster. Things will get ugly if they don’t treat carefully this plotline. I can hope for some twist, fuller background, but once (you know, season 3 mess) I had such hope, in vain;) I don’t see how this is ever going to be okay again for now.
4. I hope it’s not over, but the AoS writers usualy put the closure and make the caracters healing offscreen:(, so, I don’t expect believable closure, there are only four episodes left, a lot of it of it won’t be addressed properly. Finally, for Fitz’ mental health I need RealFitz to come through by himself, not by Jemma, especially after Daisy’s remarks that Fitz became a Doctor in a world without Jemma.
Hey there, Mary! Somehow this turned into a jumbled mess, but bear with me.
I really do like the writing, despite how much it hurts! They are really doing a good job of balancing all the characters and showing how all of them are trying to get through the world that AIDA put them into. 
And they definitely WERE brainwashed, just as much as those kids in that facility. They have been programmed to play the roles that they play. I think the greatest evidence of that is that this isn’t just the world that would happen if a handful of people had made different choices—it’s a world in which AIDA/Madame Hydra is the supreme ruler of the universe. That’s not an accident. And it’s DEFINITELY not an accident that Jemma’s dead, and that AIDA has Fitz as her Ken doll. AIDA is framing this world to be what SHE wants, and some are under more control than others. Coulson, Mack, and Mace didn’t have to drink the Kool-aid, but Fitz and May definitely did. 
It’s not just that they have different memories—they have different morals. Coulson is a person who’s afraid to stand up until Daisy comes along. Mack is, too! Mace is exactly the opposite in that he’s NOT the coward he was before. And May and Fitz? They believe that what they’re doing is the right and best thing.
That’s why I don’t see Fitz as a sadist. He’s not doing it because he enjoys hurting people. He does it because he thinks it’s necessary. Daisy tells him that he doesn’t want to torture her, but he does because a) she’s a threat and b) he thinks she’s lying to him. And yet, when he kills Agnes, he asks himself: Did I have to? Was it necessary? Or was she a person I should have protected? That is a man who believes that what he’s doing is RIGHT, it’s just that someone went into his brain and changed what right and wrong mean. It’s the same thing that happened to Kara Palamas.
To contrast, let me tell you a little about Star Trek. In Star Trek: Voyager, there’s this episode called The Killing Game, in which these aliens abduct the characters, implant false memories, and put them in an alternate reality: Nazi Germany. Sound familiar? There’s a difference, though: the characters gravitate to the same roles they have in their real lives. The captain becomes the leader of the Resistance, the married couple starts to flirt with each other (even though he doesn’t know her baby is also his), and the team ends up defeating the bad guys in a way that’s authentic to them. They were given false histories, but they were still the same people, even though they didn’t have to be. That’s because no one was purposefully trying to change who they were.
[This got long, so the rest is under the cut!]
And I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to fundamentally change yourself, Mary. I have. I got to a point in my life where I had to change everything down to my thoughts and my perception of the world, because depression goggles can really mess you up. It took me almost a decade of constant, intentional, hard work to change myself that much. You can’t change Fitz that drastically with a flip of a switch. It might look that way when he’s in public, but have you noticed that he’s different in private settings? When he’s alone with Ophelia or his father, he’s completely different. That’s where we see the real Fitz peek through—when he doesn’t have to put on a show. And what happens then? The brainwashing continues. Madame Hydra and his father reinforce the lies he’s been told, with the silent threat that he will lose their love if he doesn’t step in line. That’s not a sadist. That’s not even The Doctor. That’s someone in more than one relationship that’s deeply abusive. 
As for Mace, yes he did get a chance to be a hero. BUT, you can’t say this is a world without limitations. The moment he became an actual threat to her, AIDA killed him. Like I said above, everyone is under her control. This is a prison in disguise. No one is living their true potential, and I think Mace and Mack are the only ones who are getting anything close to what they actually want, and the price for them is STEEP.  
As for if one event can change your entire self, we actually have two conflicting viewpoints: Radcliffe and Jemma. Look at these two people and what they think about accountability. One most definitely believes he is the victim of circumstance, even though this whole predicament came from his choices. The other believes that if you want something in life, you have to work hard and earn it. She believes that people are more than their programming, even though a SERIES of events might give a person an opportunity to go another way.  We are seeing this debate play out, but I think it’s obvious who’s winning. If this world were the natural consequences of one different event in each person’s life, AIDA wouldn’t need the thought police to keep them in line.
Also, I personally have a moral objection to this deterministic idea that one thing can happen to you, and you have no way of overcoming it. That’s what we’re saying, right? It changes you forever, and that’s that? A bad father means you’re going to be a bad person? A mental illness means you have no chance of being happy? I refuse to accept that idea, because it means that people don’t have any actual agency, and if you take away someone’s agency, you’re taking away a large portion of their personhood. We each have the responsibility and power to change ourselves, to rise above our circumstances. Coulson is doing that right now. May did it, in a large part, between seasons one and three. If we don’t have the power to change ourselves, there is no actual meaning in life. There’s no reason to vote or have children or try to help a stranger. We’re all just a victim of our circumstances, right? Why make any kind of effort of nothing’s going to change? 
So, I mean, yes, a character did say that onscreen. I wouldn’t take it as gospel. That character is also the supreme idiot whose lack of morality and accountability got us in this mess in the first place.
As for the truth behind Fitz’s turn, I think you’ve hit the nail on the head here: it’s not convincing that he’s a monster. He maybe a man playing at being a monster, he may be a man who believes that he NEEDS to be a monster, but like I said, a monster wouldn’t worry about killing Agnes. It’s not that the Doctor was in Fitz—it’s that Fitz is in the Doctor. He HAS been brainwashed, but there’s a part of him that’s fighting back. There’s a part of him that’s drawn to Jemma. There’s a part of him that’s rising above his circumstances. The problem he has is that he has two people who are actively trying to keep him down. Coulson, May, Mace, and Mack don’t have that. They have the environment in general keeping them down, but they aren’t being targeted by specific people. Fitz doesn’t just have to rise up. He has to conquer AIDA and his father first.
You know that I agree with season 3 being a mess, but this season had a masterful setup. This isn’t Jemma having PTSD one episode and not having it the next. This is Jemma and Radcliffe having competing viewpoints from the start! She’s trying to grab power to help her friends; he’s trying to skirt his responsibilities in order to help himself (and pretending he’s helping others to assuage his guilt/get other people to help him). That’s 4x01! And Fitz, this whole time, has been caught in the middle. You don’t have that kind of storytelling in season 3. Jemma is going to have her moment, she is going to make her own arguments, and she’s going to win because she’s actually right. So I mean, yes, we’ve seen the writers royally screw up before, but all they have to do is follow the exact course they’ve already set, and we’ll end up with some of the most powerful storytelling we’ve ever seen. I’m cautiously hopeful.
I think you’re right, though, that the characters won’t get as much closure as we’d like. They’ll probably get a hug and cut to black, a short conversation if we’re lucky. My real OTP for this show is myself x closure, so I get how frustrating this is. We should prepare for headcanon to fill in the gaps.
Finally, the good news is that Fitz has already come through with the help of Agnes. Agnes is the one who’s making him question himself. Daisy, too. I think that Jemma has contributed a little bit, but it’s mostly Agnes that is weighing on him. And if he has to fight May, his most trusted soldier? If Madame Hydra gets sick and can’t influence him? If he find out about the brainwashing of teenagers (I’m not convinced that he knows) (or maybe there’s something else he doesn’t know about)? It’s all going to fall apart. Jemma might be the final nail in that coffin, but it’s not just going to be her. In the end, we’re going to get Real Fitz back because Real Fitz is going to rise up. That’s what it’s looking like, at least!
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