#oh and I can’t even focus on my hyperfixations rn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

late-to-the-party-221 · 3 years

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trigger warning

tw for: eating disorders

Hi. I am a Sherlock side blog. I also have a main blog & a blog for reblogging reblog bait & stuff. I'm sorry to make this post tobthis blog, but it has the most followers & it NEEDS to be said. I have another email, a 10-minute-mail in fact, & another blog under there. It is my ED blog.

Hey followers, would you expect me to have an evil pro an*r*xia blog that tries to give children EDs & calls it a lifestyle? Well that's because we don't do that.

We are struggling. We are mentally ill. We support recovery & harm reduction, even if we are not ready ourselves to recover. We support the person not the illness.

There has been a huge wave of my friends getting terminated, & I have been terminated thrice in the past two days. Three times bc I just made a new blog. We will keep coming back.

If you report us, it ranges from a minor inconvenience where we just make a new blog & keep going, to a huge trigger where I can't even say all the harm you will do in one post.

Please let us suffer in peace. Please let us practice harm reduction with support from our friends & community. I have written this post so many times, with different content each time. Ranging from "this is what ACTUALLY happens when you report someone" to "screw off I'm mad" & anything in between, including how we interact- or avoid interacting with non ed blogs; how we react to people "trying" to "give themselves" an ed, the gruesome details of the worst case scenarios if you report us, debunking what you think happens when you report us, & more which I am forgetting.

I'm writing this post on my main account & a sideblog with more followers so that more people can see it & so that tumblr can't terminate me. This post is coming from a regular person like you. I have adhd & a probable math based learning disability, & diagnosed dysphoria (but for some reason not diagnosed gender dysphoria), I used to have an unus annus hyperfixation, then I had a Sherlock hyperfixation. I like the mysterious Benedict society & I am re-reading the series with my mom rn as I watch the show with my dad. I like Firefly, a series of unfortunate events, moomins, good omens, snowpiercer, Steven universe, she-ra, kippo, unwanteds, Rick riordan, falsettos or the Marvin trilogy, & more. I am transmasc (nonbinary) & queer. I am low key emo. I play fiddle & some classical & I even make punk fiddle covers. I like to dance at fiddle dances, I like to polka, I like swing dancing, & salsa. I can knit & sew, I make embroidery sometimes, I can do some woodworking bc my dad was a carpenter, & I am a kung fu student. I am a devout Christian & I mix witchcraft into my religion. I am reconnecting with my indigenous ancestry because I lost it generations ago. I love to bake & it is a great hobby of mine. I enjoy cooking & I want to turn it into my career. I want to be part of kids' lives as a titi or teacher, but I don't want kids of my own. I am an anarcho-socialist. i like rock climbing. I have a family who I support & love. I am a normal person like the rest of you. these are a lot ignored pieces of me, but not all of them of course. One of the pieces I did not include here was my disordered eating. It's a problem, a bad coping mechanism, but it is smth that i need to live with.

You know Roman catholic confession? That has gone down in recent years, but therapy & counselling has increased. Speaking your heart into the void & being listened to by strangers has also increased. We need this. i have had probably 9 maybe more ed blogs. Oh no evil ed blog? What happened to me being a cool human being who likes sewing & fandoms?

we are people too. Focus your efforts on reporting pedophiles, there are a lot of those posing in the ed community & those are the actual threat. Or let us deal with them & stay away from the ed community.

Stay away from the ed community for your safety, the safety of your followers, & the safety of the ed community.

Stop reporting us. Please block us.

Please reblog this post too & make sure you tag it with an ed tw. I don't want to write this post from an ed blog bc I don't want the ed community to be exposed, so pls reblog this post & please don't report me bc this is a Sherlock blog.

#Dom og #Non specific #Pls reblog #mom no look

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no-merci · 3 years

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Daydream recovery, the big post to kick it off (again)

Okay, so I’m splitting this post up into at least two parts, in the first one I’m going to write down my daydream triggers as I find them, and in the second part I’m going to talk about strategies for avoiding or redirecting my attention

Daydream triggers:

New music, music I haven’t heard before or do not know very well

Empty kitchen

Percy Jackson

Okay, so for now this is a (thankfully) short list. I’m sure there’s probably more things, but these are the biggest and hardest to resist things I’ve noticed (that aren’t just like, making tea or whatever I think could be spiced up with a para or two) so now I’m going to focus on:

Solutions and redirections

Do not listen to new music alone, when music in general is too much, there’s always podcasts! Podcasts are the recovering daydreamers best friend! I should make a post of podcast reccomendations

Whenever I’m going to an empty room, make sure I have a plan. If I’m looking for food, play a podcast instead of music to help me focus (maybe wear headphones? I can’t pace with headphones on for fear of someone coming in without me noticing)

This one is tougher, I think I’m just going to have to avoid reading Percy Jackson for a while :( the good news is that there won’t be another book for a while at least, so I’m not going to have to read it because I can’t not have new content and then und up spiralling into hyperfixation and daydreams (looking at you tower of Nero)

Okay, so I’ve gotten solutions to those specific problems, now it’s time for me to talk general strategy, what went wrong before, and my game plan going forwards:

Okay, so the first time I relapsed was for two reasons: sleep and excuses. Really in its most basic essence it’s one big reason, and it’s the same reason for the second most recent one. (I mean, there’s the added outside world conditions rn that I don’t think are helping, but I digress)

So it boils down to this: I tried to tell myself it was okay to daydream so long as it wasn’t biting into my time.

Ie: it’s okay, I’m going to sleep so I might as well daydream just to get to sleep. Then it became, oh well what if I just daydream while I’m doing tasks? So I can daydream while I’m washing up? (This I think is a large reason the kitchen became such a hazard zone for me, it’s was one of the only places I still let myself daydream for a while, so whenever I was in ther I would daydream)

From there it just kinda, slipped. My daydreaming got to be as bad as ever, and I didn’t try again until maybe a month ago.

This time, I knew that daydreaming to sleep was a bad idea, and that I shouldn’t do that, so I didn’t.

I’ll talk more in alternatives to daydreaming to sleep later

So the problem this time, well it was largely Percy Jackson. I read the new book and got sucked right back into that paracosm, at first I was just running a few lines or scenarios, and then I was doing full comfort scenes, and well here we are, and I’ve checked in on all of my old faves at this point

So what now?

Part three: the plan

Okay so here’s what I’m going to do

The good news, is I haven’t relapsed into bedtime daydreams yet so I’m safe for that (I had a pretty strong urge the other night, but I watched some stuff and calmed down) so here is what I’ve been doing instead of daydreams: I’ve been listening to podcasts and watching art restoration

Seriously, it’s great you should try it

So what about when I feel a scenario running through my mind?

Well I’m going to focus on all the bad parts of daydreaming

I’m sure we’ve all experienced daydream crash right? The feeling after coming out of a daydream with the crushing realisation that you’ve wasted your own time and that none of it is real and never can be? You know, the fun stuff

Well one of the biggest reasons I quit daydreams was because I wasn’t getting fulfilment out of them. I kept running the same scenes, I kept doing the same stories and I wasn’t getting anything new or exciting from it, and that made it a lot easier to quit. Until my mind started providing new ideas. Well, to help combat that I’m focusing on all of the bad feelings I feel while daydreaming

I feel like a therapist might tell me this kind of thing is unhealthy, but I can’t see a therapist and it’s the most effective thing I’ve found. Whenever I feel a daydream idea pop up, I remind myself of all the worst feelings I feel coming down from a daydream, and that helps me avoid them.

I’m also doing nanowrimo this month! And I’m not setting myself necessarily a specific story, I’m jumping around a bit, so whenever I feel the need to daydream I’m just going to try writing instead. I’ll write anything, maybe I’ll write about the idea of the daydream, it doesn’t matter

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So I’ve addressed what we’re the biggest gaps in my security before, and I hope this time goes better

If you want you can drop your own daydreaming prevention tips drown below! Or even if you just want to ramble about your own experiences or whatever at all I’d love to hear it

💖💕 good luck 💕💖

#maladaptive daydream recovery #maladaptive daydreaming #madd #madd recovery #madd things

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