#okay i’m done good night

[swedenis-h]

Hey guys.. so they’re best friends

#ARMAND AND RICCARDO ARE BESTIES IDC IDC #idk what happens to Riccardo but I know it’s nothing good! #I learned nothing from Nicki #riccardos my lil guy #I’m not done with tva yet but idc about spoilers #also tried a different way of coloring and Im in love with it #okay bye have a good night 🫶 #tvc #iwtv #the vampire chronicles #the vampire armand #tva #Armand tvc #riccardo tvc

[formulafics]

#disclaimer: this is just a vent don’t feel obligated to say anything 😼🙏🏻 #tw. alcohol #trauma is real #which obviously i knew that but im feeling it rn and im just 🧍🏻‍♀️ #long story short my mom used to drink a lot #and she chilled out recently but tonight has drank a lot more than usual and lord have mercy it’s messing with me bad folks #the amount of songs i can’t listen to be i go into flight or fight mode bc my mom used to blare them while drunk #which i mean i could have it a lot worse but yk #and like i can’t even be frustRted with my mom without feeling bad bc ik she deals with a lot but i can’t do anything to help #and the speed at which the night can go from good to bad bc of her drinking #not to mention i’m rewatching yellowstone and i still like it but it also brings back bad memories with my mom #bc we were watching yellowstone while she and i had some of our worse fights (due to her drinking) #anyways. if you’re reading shoutout to you i hope you don’t relate to this but if you do you’re not alone and ily #also who likes yellowstone #ryan please give me a chance (he’s a fictional cowboy who’s definitely too old for me) #(but i want him) #okay i’m done i hope you’re having a good night if you’ve read this far 🙏🏻

[celestialulu]

i have a hot take that may be hottest one yet but idk .

#it might not be that hot of a take actually #I’m gonna say it in the tags #okay so the whole #Natsu and Lucy get really drunk and do the thing #and the aftermath of that being weird n whatever #and Lucy getting pregnant #i feel like the whole idea wouldn’t be that bad #if it was done differently #like I’d eat it up if it was Lucy wanting and needing to tell him but #about bring pregnant after the drunken night * #BEING* #they’re confused about what they are to each other #and what not #so she just can’t with the nerves and then #yeah you get the point #I’d eat it up if it was like that #this makes no sense I think #I’ll delete this in a bit #guys in my head it’s really good you don’t get it #I’m so tired sorry

[homophyte]

Golden I, live from Webster Hall in NYC, from Our Pain Your Gain

#myposts #mindless self indulgence #emetophobia tw #more vomiting in this one than you’d think #i’m gonna have to come back to this to add commentary some other time but this may be my favorite performance of theirs possibly ever #it’s up there with 99 maritime hall pussy all night for sure #i mean all of our pain you gain is really good #but the way he fucks with the vocals here the changed line in the bridge #kitty visibly having fun the pit #lindsey. #steve doing some fucking just…wacked out performance art it’s just so captivating every time #the vomit obviously but the posture of how he plays on the floor #wrapping the microphone around his neck and making it his leash??? its a wow every fcuking time #and god i love this song so so much it’s done such great justice here #okay nevermind i guess that’s the commentary lol whatever it’s SUCH good video

[crimezi]

watching the midnight club is making me so emotional, it really hits seeing sick kids actually talk about their impending deaths and it not be like all in terms of metaphor and miracles but by being happy and not healthy, making mistakes, having prophetic nightmares, lashing out, getting super high and getting very religious, falling in love and crying a whole lot and being haunted and that’s not okay, we keeping telling stories until we can’t anymore

#the midnight club #flanaganverse #like as a sick kid (md & autoimmune) seeing sick kids (cancer) displayed without all the frills is so fucking good #sorry i just got to amesh’s death day and it reminded me of a friend #real night posting for me is crying because they kissed #and ways i love all the kids and they can do all the wrong and that’s okay #sick like solidarity transcends time #love your hospital/hospice buddies while you can #alright i’m done stay alive just a little longer

[starbuck]

What if my anxiety melted away and everything was fine, actually.

#guys. i’m okay. i’m fine. #it’s actually happening #i’m getting on the medication that might finally actually help me with one of my chronic conditions #i turned in the big scary assignment and i’m really proud of my work #something REALLY HUGE AND GOOD happened at work that i’ll be announcing soon #and like. suddenly the world doesn’t seem so bad and overwhelming and scary… #i’ve been feeling so hopeless and beaten down and dissociated from myself #and then suddenly driving home from work today i remembered that i am capable #and that no matter how much there is to be done - i can and will do it #i am strong and i am smart and i have an amazing team by my side #and we fucking HAVE this man! #i can’t believe i ever doubted it #it all makes so much sense now #there is still SO much to do and it is still A LOT #but people are hearing and supporting and loving me through it #and that is exactly what i need #bless you all and good night!

[e77y]

Sometimes cooking in a 90 degree car is good for the soul (it’s not) (I’m just trying to save gas bc I wanted to sit in my car instead of the library)

#I would’ve just stayed inside #but I was scared that I lost my headphones so I had to go out to my car and check #good news: they were in my car! #bad news: got a bad grade in ERP 😔 #<- joking. I’m not in therapy 😝😜😛😋😚😎🤓 #SOON. #okay ​I’ve been saying ‘soon’ for like 4 years #but fr #I was putting off scheduling a psych appointment until after all my breast ultrasound stuff was done #and now it’s been like a month or two and I have just totally forgotten about it #until last night when my mom reminded me 😭 #I guess I should schedule an appointment tomorrow… bleh. I hate phone calls I will explode and die #but it’s worth it ig #I’m so nervous ahhh #okay SORRY FOR THE RAMBLE #it’s almost time for me to go anyway so I can turn the car on now. yay. sweet sweet AC #ellyposting

[chryzure]

whew, people get heated over their fav booktok book.

#memorie.txt #once you’ve read more you’re more willing to admit that you love a kinda poorly written book #by god i love jackaby. the writing style is a solid 3/5 and the plot stuff is cheesy as hell. #you get a better frame of reference for ‘this book requires an award’ style of good #and a ‘god this is so my dumb little niche that scratches all those weird little itches nobody else has’ style of good #one of my fav series is the ghost and the goth!! is it good?? i don’t know if i’d go that far!! #is it fun and does it make me think of trysi / chryzure stuff??? yes :) #i’m beginning to wonder abt ppl rabid abt their fav books. anyway this one person was losing their shit over ppl liking apollo #and aurora and i’m an aurora shooter but i digress #they were foaming at the mouth and im like Well. its a little not that serious . #he is letters on a page. and also mostly irrelevant to the story as a whole so im kinda confused as to why ppl feel so strongly abt him #it’s funny because most of my complaints stem from an outside pov #where i critique the worldbuilding / plot work / character writing and its inconsistencies #whereas ppl assume im encouraging villainy irl. it is quite seriously more that the villainy is unmotivated #or otherwise poorly done. i love to hate a good villain if the proper legwork is put into it #because i like observing how others work their craft!!! #but my irritation with stephanie is that she doesn’t work her craft well. it’s shoddy craftsmanship full of retcons or #convenience required for plot that otherwise hold no reasoning in the story #and i can admit that i find the series unsatisfying because it’s marketed as a romance (the romance had little chemistry that could be #understood by anyone that’s not straight. straight romances are always laziest because it’s the ‘norm’ so that equates to chem) #and also it was marketed as having plot when rlly the ‘plot’ was trying to put these characters in weird chemistry-less situations together #so yeah i’ll complain abt the villains being jealous shallow archetypes when it could’ve had depth. #i’ll complain abt a lot. but in the end it’s a silly basic ya romance series that isn’t anything unique #most unique stories will not be found on booktok. i’m sorry #i can show you the beautiful world of horror novels though! #or weird lil 80s fantasy novels that are actually quite long that my dad likes showing me #truly no romance novel will be better than the darkangel trilogy though.. that is what stephanie wanted to write. #but that’s lightning in a bottle ithink. #okay anyway. good night. i worked a long day and i have appts in the morning

[milo-is-rambling]

I wish I had friends near meeeeeee to distract me from my brainnnnnnnnnn

#need to talk to anyone irl who isn’t related to me or dating my mom or my therapist #anyone else near me please I’m losing my mind #nature isn’t healing me sleeping in a fully dark room all day isn’t healing me how do I magically fix this without having to put any work #into it oh I can’t oh u have to do the work okay how do I do that. therapy once a week. oh. okay. yup. #can I speedrun it? oh no? I can’t. oh damn. okay fine whatever. therapy once a week. AND I HAVE TO ACTUALLY LISTEN AND DO WHAT SHE SAYS. bro #what the hell okay fine #well here I am !!!!! where is the fixing where is the feeling better I feel like all I do is stir up all these touch emotions from every #part of my life at once and then she sends me off to rot for week before I come back and talk again #I just feel like I’m losing it!!!!! and ik it’s extra bad bc birthday countdown is on in my brain and im stressed and i feel like a huge #fuck up that can never be fixed and like I will die having done nothing with my life except weigh other people down and so exhausting and my #brain won’t ever shut up like yes I get it years and years and years of built up shit that I never properly dealt with and still hold blame #for constantly and I feel like I will never be fixed like I CANT be fixed like this is a losing battle and I just am struggling today man #idk what I was saying I just took my morning weed hit to try and relax my back a little and now my brain is like scrambled eggs #which is good that means it’s working #I’m gonna try to take a nap maybe cause I only slept four hours and it was like choppy thru the night and then maybe I’ll go to the lake #later I’ve been feeling the need to be in a body of water recently

[bnt0]

#okay okay I’m done #good night lovelies have a good weekend #nonsims #*bnt0 speaks the exact right amount + i love her + ratio #cw smoking #I guess lol whadda hell

[dirtbra1n]

so it’s like. the significance of location and setting in the waking hours because the normalcy there provides good contrast but also establishes what “normal” looks like before the weirdness and unreality of the river creeps into it and starts eating it from the inside out. but also thinking about making those normal spaces liminal and weird in their own right is fun fodder for the brain. like okay lights out in the dorms and masato’s hanging off a couch upside down. the back of the school where there’s those vending machines tashiro was talking about, standing disgruntled reflected in the glass because he can’t make a decision on what he wants. school hallways during blue hour, walking away at a brisk pace because a lot was happening all at once. that kind of thing. have I lost you yet

#another day of wishing that i could put my thoughts to paper as images. very sad #anyway was thinking last night about tashiro gender again. how the greatest queer payoff happens #when he still has his hairy legs and defined arms and broad..ish shoulders. like that’s so much there #and was also thinking again about how i’m selling niche wares in a niche market. just funny #need someone to mass produce regular-enough hanzashiro propaganda #like i need someone to do the heavy lifting with the sign spinning like NOW! #was praying really hard for the hanzawa masato lore drop again. can you tell Also tashiropilled myself BAD #busy few nights <- eyebags #by the way today (technically yesterday) was the five year anniversary for this blog. storied history of what is now dirtbra1n #okay enough basically just this post is me trying to mass beam everyone the stills in my head of masato haunting various locations #but in the regular weird-teenager way. done now Good talk #dirtbrain digression

[floral-hex]

Hey!

my mom got a liver transplant. so that’s kinda cool.

#jk I’m stoked. #jk the only thinking it’s cool part. not jk to the transplant. that’d be a fucked up joke. #it’s super cool. awesome even. #so it was my little bro’s 16th birthday AND my mom got a new liver AND I went to the zoo! #long long day #she was in surgery from like 5 a.m. till early afternoon #so I took my brother to the zoo for his birthday and it was a really nice time #should note at that point we knew she was doing okay. #she was mostly done but no visitors yet. #I wouldn’t have gone to look at the penguins if I was still worrying about her #so… yeah! #she was looking ROUGH afterwards. still was when I left earlier. #can’t spend the night because her hospital is an hour away and I’ve gotta take care of my bros and the animals at home #I hate seeing her all beat up #I know she’s technically ‘doing great’ but she was so out of it and in pain and I didn’t know what to do #scary. sad. angry at my sister for not coming to see her. #…. lotsa stuff! in my brain house! #okay anyway and then I went out to eat with my brothers and drove an hour home #good day #okay anyway sorry to bother you #you can ignore this #text

[dahldahlbills]

nano day 2 & 3 update

day 2

Total Word count: 1689; 1421 towards a fic, and 268 towards my main wip

Did a lot of handwriting so I wasn’t able to see exactly how much I wrote until I typed it up today (hence the late update)

day 3

Total Word count: 1603; 901 towards a fic, and 702 towards my main wip

I did two sprints towards my main wip and got ~350 words for both 20min sprints, im kinda proud of that ngl

I’m making steady progress and for the most part on track for that 50k which is kinda neat! (still not what I’m going for tho so i can’t let it get to my head lol)

but overall I’m feeling really good so far I’m excited to see what I accomplish tomorrow :D

#bet you all thought I gave up after day one huh #but no!! i was just too busy last night to give an update lol #‘you all’ being the three (3) people who know I’m doing Nano #the fic writing kinda dominated the past few days #Im hoping the oc brainrot will kick in at some point bc I really do want to prioritize that #‘i just need to get this fic out and then I’ll be good’ I say but then watch me say it again next week with another fic #it’s okay tho I’m not in a huge rush for cryptids wip #like i kinda should be if I’m aiming for 2025 but it’ll be okay #i don’t want that pressure at such an early stage #anyway I don’t expect to get a lot of writing done tomorrow bc we’re having Guests 😬 #but i will try my best #my drawing will also be dropping SIGNIFICANTLY this month #i say as if it hasn’t already the past several months 💀 #but Im not feeling that bad about it compared to before bc there’s no Events that are adding pressure to my creating #any time I do draw will be in my sketchbook. it’ll be a nice break from digital #i Can finally make some progress on those jojo spreads I’ve been dying to make #and by make progress I mean I’ll barely finish one lol #(i dont mean that negatively. I’ll be having fun the whole time I’m just making fun of how slow I am) #anyway #dahl does nano 23

[morgana-pendragon]

#v v v v v v v interesting to me to see whose bad behaviour the blog decided to call out. v e r y #and before y’all go all confirmation bias on me AGAIN. i am Not saying they shouldn’t have commented on the uncalled for racism. obviously #idk what went on in hannigram v naruto tags & if i’m honest i don’t care. i have nothing to do with them. if they were racist call them out #what i Am saying is there were two sides to this issue & if you’re gonna condemn one side’s bigotry you gotta call out the other’s. #bc rn it just screeeeeeaaaaaamsssss that they’re conveying that all that lesbophobia and misogyny was a-okay to them. lmao #anyway good night it’s all done we’re out of the poll so this matter is closed i will rb once tomorrow to root for msr and that’s it #but good fucking riddance to this poll lmfao this website never fails to show how it feels about women idk why i thought this’d be different #and anon is off btw if y’all wanna call me racist again y’all have to do it with your main blogs on blast this time bc i’m tired of y’all

[picklesquash]

It’s honestly become a full time job to figure out how fucked you are after Election Day in the U.S.

#politics #us politics #before I forget #but on the one hand I think my state’s races turned out pretty okay? #although they still haven’t decided the ag race (I’m going to be suuuuper mad if the trust fund lawyer wins) #or it looks like the auditor race? (where the incumbent has been super supportive of our new union at work) #HOWEVER for the first time in years d’s have the governor house and senate! #on the other hand who tf really knows what’s happening in the national house and senate #it looks like it’s still sorta up in the air? #some good laughs to be had with dr. oz losing and also maybe lauren boebert??? #?????? #I’m so glad I didn’t obsess over coverage last night like I’ve done in the past though #thank yoooou 2016 election trauma!

[starbuck]

the way the dishes can seem like an impassible, insurmountable burden and then take under ten minutes to do.

#(timing calculated in Mountain Goats songs) #my hands are very dry and i’m too exhausted to go get hand cream but it’s OKAY #but it’s okay!!!!!! #my dishes are DONE and my towels are DRYING and my teeth are CLEAN and my alarm is SET #i love larping as a functional person day after day #it’s not easy but it sure is worth it in the end #i’m gonna go to bed RIGHT now and get a good night’s sleep as much as i’m able to here #i’ve got a busy week ahead