#please just put me back on lithium or whatever ok? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blondrichclosetwitch · 1 year

Text

“I can hear violence, violence.”

3/6/17 psychic Jakk freakout in cali

Were you doing any drugs?

What were you doing? Were you doing cocaine?

Were you doing anything else?

Just cocaine and alcohol.

Let me switch back, I can hear you on this one better (switches pendulums)

Just cocaine and alcohol?

And was it you and Blond with some other people?

And….did you...did you get...did you get aggro?

…..

Yes.

Was it at one of your friends?

One of your guy friends?

Wait, let’s have you come to a stop. I want you to answer each question one by one.

Was it at one of your guy friends.

Yes. OKay. Stop. Did they have to sss., did they have to...sedate you?

Were you out of control. Did you lose control.

Yes.

Um, ...did, did they call the cops? (quietly) Yes.

…………...did you see a doctor when you got back. So that’s why i’ve been shaking so much?

Because you’ve got shakes? Did you tell Blond that she’s going to miscarry the baby? You did. (sighs) ……..Did the doctors put you on anything? You know if Blond is on so many medications, why is she drinking? You know?

Um, ...God. So you went on medication right before our anniversary. Right before the abortion anniversary. So when you keep playing “England” and you say you went into a church, you had just gotten out of a hospital. …..was this the secret you wanted, you needed to tell me? That had been building up for a long time...you know. It just had. How bad did it get? You hit your friend? Did you keep drinking after that? She was trying to keep you drunk you know. Please Jakk , don’t let her...don’t let her win. You’re stronger than she is. You’re stronger. I know you feel compromised. Did you tell me that you were already in the hospital just so that i would be with you all the time? Theres no question that (yawns) you’re in the wrong band. You’re in the wrong band, babe. You know that? You’re in the wrong band. You deserve to be in my band.

Talking about psychic Jakk(gina) 3/7/17

“Do you want me to hold the tree in my other hand for this?

So in LA, in California, did jakk basically have a pre-nervous breakdown? Yes. Is he… Is the reason that he is able to hear me , Is his brain, is he basically in between worlds right now? Is he partially, does he have mediumystic qualities? So it’s partially a little bit of both.Got it. Whatever he’s doing, whether he’s sleeping whether he’s at work whether Blond is there, he still can hear me. is he able, is it that he’s able to control the music? So he’s playing me songs to explain things to me. And he understands that I am hearing all of this. And he understands that I am his last link. His last human link. And that Blond’s deception and manipulation has been causing him to crack.

Is he on medication‘s right now? Are they… Is he under a misdiagnosis? Has he been misdiagnosed? OK you said what he needs is lithium? OK.

What was it that they diagnosed him as, just depression? Got it. Is he going to go with me to the hospital next Tuesday? Does he understand that he needs to find what hospital will take his insurance? Does his brain work enough for him to find that information?

Do I need to explain to him that he needs to use a work phone so that Blond cannot find that?

Should I stop right now and tell him that? Jack. It’s me. Listen to me. When you start to make the calls to find the place for you too… You need to start going into work early to look for a place. To go into. Use the work phone so that it’s not on your phone. And you need to have them call you at work. Do you understand? Make sure they call you at work and not on your phone phone. Because Blond looks on your phone. So have them call you at work or use your work email. I’m gonna go back to talking to gina, And then I’ll be back.

So he will do that, I will just keep doing the rituals that I’ve been doing? The sex the tree the prayers. God said that I should cancel Boston, is that correct?

I need to think about getting back into the swing, so I should not plan on seeing him until a week from today is that correct? I should do a reading with the Tarot Reader this weekend? What day? Friday Saturday Sunday Monday… Monday? You’re saying Monday….Monday night? Oh the night before I’m supposed to see him. OK. Not Saturday. Because we originally said Saturday. You’re saying Monday.And do one for 350. Am I supposed to do something with Langston? I’m supposed to do a shamanic journey. But I also have to get rent in. And I have to finish… I have to text that guy about his reading, should I text him right now? What are your thoughts about today? Should I go … Should I look for a hotel? Will you help me do that? How much money do we have in the bank? Is today the day that John Messina killed himself?

It says I only have…. dude we’re down to 393.

OK, time to do it. We are OK. We are all here together. So let me ask you do you want me to look for A hotel in Long Island city? Does that look good to you?

The Wyndham Garden Long Island city? Same one we went to before?

Should I book it to check in today?You’re saying that with the incidentals I would have enough money still.

Let’s call and find out.”

#watch the tapes

0 notes

starlightinhumanform · 5 years

Text

The Art of Love: Chapter 1

Fandom: She Ra (2018)

Ship: Glimadora

Summary: Glimmer is a grumpy artist who gets paired up Adora, the ever-popular soccer player, for a project in her dreaded chemistry class.

Warnings (for this chapter): Negative self talk, Some descriptions of emotional distress, (please tell me if anything needs to be added)

Genre: High School AU, Angst with a Happy Ending, Rivals/Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Fluff

A/N: This started out as a short little drabble idea I had for @glimadora-week‘s AU day and then I kind of got carried away... I hope you enjoy! Love you all 🖤✨

Ao3 The Art of Love Masterpost Fic Masterpost Fic Request Info

Glimmer slumped forward into her seat and piled her bag of art and supplies onto the desk. Her teacher’s eyes flicked up directly in front of her, making it seem like a spotlight was shining over her head. Why did she have to sit right next to the teacher’s desk?

“Do you have a late pass?”

Her eyes snapped from side to side incredulously, “No?”

The teacher clucked, “Don’t sound so surprised- you’re late!”

“By two seconds! Besides,” she swung her arm out to draw Ms Weaver’s attention over to the two soccer girls chatting in the corner, “they’re not even sitting down!”

Ms Weaver’s scrutiny didn’t shift from Glimmer’s face for even a second, but the two girls were staring at her now. They were both wearing high-waisted shorts and the red shirts of the school soccer team- ever popular, ever beautiful. Adora was the taller of the two with blond hair kept tightly in a ponytail that hypnotized anyone who walked behind her with its rhythmic swing. She was Ms Weaver’s favourite and everybody knew it.

“Stop making a spectacle, Glimmer,” Weaver’s voice brought her back to the present, “Now, if you don’t mind, I would like to start the class.”

Glimmer huffed and glared at the other girl who was sticking her tongue out in her direction. Her name was Cateline or something like that but everybody just called her Cat.

Glimmer rolled her eyes and shifted to face the front of the room as the girls walked (or rather sashayed) to their seats and put her head down on her desk. She let her mind wander as Weaver’s voice droned on a few feet ahead of her. The paint spots splattering the canvas bag lying on her desk always became exponentially more interesting in her chemistry class. She hummed softly, rocking her head gently from side to side from where it rested on the crook of her bent elbow.

“... so I’ll be choosing your partners.”

Those cursed words brought Glimmer’s mind crashing back into focus. She shot up, “What?!”

Ms Weaver glared at her and hissed her words through gritted teeth, “Maybe if you payed attention you would know what’s going on.”

Glimmer sunk down into her seat and tried to hide her face behind her art bag, her face burning and her stomaching churning. She could hear the class giggling and snickering around her.

“Are there any relevant questions?”

Behind her there was movement.

In front, Weaver sighed, “Yes, Kyle?”

“When are we going to find out who we are partners with?”

“Now, actually,” Weaver reached for a paper, “Know that these are almost completely random- except for a few I know would have been disasters- and these are final- no changes, no negotiations. That being said: Cat, you’re with Scylar; Kyle, you’re with Lonnie...”

As she continued to read through the list of students, the pace of Glimmer’s tapping foot sped up as her anxiety grew proportionally higher.

“-and Adora, you’ll be with Glimmer...”

Glimmer groaned quietly and let her face sink even further into her arm.

Ms Weaver came to the end of her list and Glimmer felt her glare momentarily pause on her curled back as the woman scanned over the class, “Well? What are you waiting for? Get to your partners and get it work!”

The classroom erupted into scuffling chaos filled with “Should I move over there or do you want to come over here?” “Hey, that’s where I was going to sit!” and “Wait who’s my partner?”; Glimmer didn’t move.

The seat next to her that had recently been vacated was refilled by a hesitant red splotch in her peripheral vision. Glimmer refused to react, unsure of what to say or do in the presence of ‘Miss Perfect’ herself and instead continued staring at the plastic wood of the desk only inches from her face.

Weaver was moving towards her hunched form; her red pencil skirt swished and her red pumps tapped on the floor as she walked, stopping a little left of Glimmer.

“You know, Adora,” she purred, “I really am sorry you had to be paired with... her, but I think you’re the only one in the class who could pull it off.”

She wasn’t even trying to whisper or keep her voice down- she wanted Glimmer to know what a failure and a nuisance she was.

Glimmer couldn’t help but growl under her breath, a sound that didn’t even escape the suffocating cave of her arms she was creating around her head. It’s not like she asked to be here. In fact, she’d rather be in any other class, in any other situation, with any other partner.

Ms Weaver swished and tapped away into another direction; off to reign terror over some other poor student.

The sound of the classroom was reaching a volume hardly ever seen in the presence of Weaver- a kaleidoscope of yelling, and discussing, and laughing-the room was filled to the brim with noise. That is, filled everywhere except the roughly 5 square feet around her and Adora. There seemed to be a bubble around them filled with a sense of awkward uncertainty that muffled the sounds of the other partners.

A hand suddenly moved to place itself on Glimmer’s still-hunched shoulder and she flinched away, but it was too late. She couldn’t go back to pretending she was a tightly curled ball now that she had proved she could actually move.

She settled on rolling her eyes and letting out a huff, “What do you want?”

Adora blinked in surprise and Glimmer realized how harsh her tone had been- oh well.

“Oh! Well, um, to work together, I guess?”

Her voice was softer than Glimmer had been expecting, but Glimmer knew better. Her soft voice and pretty eyes and her charming laugh were all a cover up for what a snake she was. She had to be- that’s the only way somebody could possibly climb up the rigorous mountain that was high school’s social hierarchy.

“Fine. What do we need to do?” Blunt. Short. Simple. The sooner she could get this over with, the better.

Adora took a deep breath and spread her hands over the desk as if she were smoothing the folds in a skirt, “So we need to make a Bohr’s model of an element and then we need to make a poster about it with that information.”

She pointed to the projected screen and Glimmer looked up in that direction just long enough to registered the fact that there were words on the screen.

“K. I’ll do the model, you do the poster.”

“Oh,” Adora glanced down for a moment before looking at Glimmer again, “Ok. I wouldn’t mind working together more, though, if you wanted?”

“Nope. This is fine,” Glimmer turned to begin rummaging through her bag for her notebook as if she could pretend the other girl wasn’t sitting next to her.

“Do you know what the Bohr model looks like?”

Glimmer whipped around, seething and with her short, bobbed hair swinging against her cheekbones for a few moments in reaction to the sudden movement, “I’m not stupid.”

Adora was taken aback and a small amount of satisfaction seeped into Glimmer’s rage.

“I’m not stupid, I’m not lazy, I’m not useless! I’m not anything Ms Weaver or you and all your nasty little friends say about me!”

If Adora was taken aback before, she was shocked now, “I- I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply anything!”

What was that: scared? apologetic? Glimmer didn’t believe either.

Adora’s face seemed to glitch for a second, “Wait- we don’t say those things about you?”

“Yeah? Then what do you say?!”

“Uhhhh,” she bit her lip and looked from side to side, “No offense, but uh, we don’t really say anything about you.”

Glimmer let out a “humph” and rolled her eyes again. She was getting close to breaking her record for most eye rolls in a 20 minute period, “What element are we doing?”

“Oh, uh...”

Could she stop saying that? Could she stop acting like she was so surprised every time Glimmer opened her mouth?

“Well, we need to choose an element. Together.”

Yuck. If Glimmer ever heard Adora using the word ‘together’ in reference to the two of them again, she would probably (no, definitely) puke.

“What about Hydrogen; that’ll be the easiest, right?”

“I think Lonnie and Kyle already took it,” she gave an apologetic frown.

“Right, fine. Lithium?”

“Penelope and Maha.”

“Calcium?”

“Elizabeth and Heith.”

Glimmer let out an exasperated cry that sounded slightly like she was being strangled, “Sodium god damn it??”

“Noelle and Sebastian.”

“Heliu- wait. Noelle isn’t in our class! She isn’t even in our grade!”

“Oh yeah, haha...” She gave Glimmer an awkward grin as if that could explain whatever the hell she was trying to do.

“Ok, why are you lying to me about this stuff?! You’re obviously making up that list as you go along- there’s literally no way you could know what elements everybody has! So what are you trying at; do you want me to fail?”

Glimmer’s firery anger was exploding again, little flames of tone lashing out at Adora as she spoke. The other girl looked surprised, as if the idea had never occurred to her and that she hadn’t expected Glimmer to be mad about lying to her.

Surprise shifted to embarrassment and a red blush settled over Adora’s cheekbones.

Why did she have to look nice even when she was all red-faced and flustered? It wasn’t fair.

Adora was poking her two index fingers together as she spoke, “Ok so, I really wanted to do this one element, Bismuth, but I wasn’t sure if you’d go for it?”

Glimmer blinked at her; she didn’t have a clue about what was going on.

“Sorry,” Adora gave a lopsided grin to compensate for... whatever she had tried to do.

“Why? Why that element; what’s so special about it?”

Adora giggled and the blush deepened to to almost scarlet on her pale skin, “Ok so like, I’m gay and like, uh, it’s gay. Ya know, bi-smuth. I would prefer lesbian-smuth, haha but, oh well...”

She shot finger guns in Glimmer’s direction and tried for a smile, but her clenched teeth just made her look more awkward, “Also it’s a rainbow so, you know, that’s cool too.”

Glimmer’s brain was short circuiting: what? The gay disaster in her head was lighting up all sorts of colours- many of them she didn’t like. She usually felt a certain sense of camaraderie with other people in the LGBT+ community and a pull started growing towards Adora; a rainbow coloured rope that wrapped around her waist and pulled by an invisible force. On the other hand, Adora simply repulsed her; she was annoying and snarky and arrogant. There was no place for someone like her in Glimmer’s world.

Adora was still rattling on, “-I mean, of course, I’d get it if you don’t want to do that, I totally-“

“I’m gay too.”

“What?”

“You go for girls right? I do too.”

“Oh!” Again with the look of surprise on her face; it made Glimmer struggle not to roll her eyes, “Cool! So, uh, could we do Bismuth or...”

She looked at Glimmer with big, round puppy-dog eyes of the clearest blue. It wasn’t fair she was so pretty while Glimmer had to sit here looking like a paint-covered potato. What a brat.

Glimmer let out another exasperated sigh and threw her hands into the air; god knows what sort of revenge someone of powerful as Adora could get if Glimmer didn’t follow along with what she wanted, “Yeah fine, let’s go ahead and do it.”

Adora’s blinding grin would have been a nice sight if Glimmer didn’t see through it to the venom, “Great! Thanks!”

She jumped forward, obviously attempting to give Glimmer a hug only to be met by a stare dripping in icicles.

Adora retracted hers arms with a quiet, “Oh, right. Sorry.”

Glimmer shifted towards the far edge of her desk to in an attempt to create more space between them. She remembered something about how increased volume decreases pressure, but maybe that only applies to gases and not people.

She pulled out her Chemistry notebook and was suddenly embarrassed for the art, stickers, and glittery puff paint adding a quarter inch of height to the cover; she wanted to prove that she wasn’t the ditz everyone was convinced she was but here she sat with a notebook that looked like it belonged to a fourth grader. She glanced at Adora who had pulled out her notebook now; it was plain black with Chemistry aggravatingly neatly written in silver sharpie. Glimmer began scolding herself in her mind for feeling ashamed for the over the top style she had always enjoyed. And since when was she trying to prove anything to anyone? Why should she care if they think she’s stupid; that’s their problem and she didn’t care... did she?

Adora had noticed Glimmer mistakenly staring at her while the turmoil boiled in her head but apparently hadn’t noticed the scowl she was wearing. The soccer girl gave her a cheery smile, looking almost hopeful. Hopeful over what?

Glimmer blew an unhumored puff of air through her nose and shook her head as she turned away from Adora once again.

“I like your notebook,” She sounded sad, hurt even; Adora was probably the strangest person Glimmer had had the inconvenience to interact with.

She threw open the cover of her notebook with as much aggression one can possibly direct at an object covered with 3D unicorn stickers.

Glimmer pulled phone out of her pocket so she could get a reference to base the model on. In the searches, an image of the metal popped up. It was quite rainbow. Maybe there was hope for this project anyways.

She tapped on an image and set her phone to rest on the side of her bag before hunching over to begin sketching her plans for the model and brainstorming possible materials. It was a relief to settle into a situation that was familiar and far more comfortable than being forced to talk to Adora. This entire class period had been one nightmare scenario chasing after another. Now, she could just focus on the paper in front of her, on the way her pencil made dusty, smooth curved lines in contrast to the ridged blue ones pre-printed on it. This was her world: the smell of graphite and the small scritching sound the tip of her pencil made as it met the glossy sheet.

But, of course, things could only go right for Glimmer for a few minutes at the most in this class. Her light source of flickering fluorescent bulbs set in the ceiling tiles was blocked out after only moments by the looming figure of Weaver.

Glimmer glared up at her, refusing to move her body, “Can I help you?”

“I just hope you’re working. I know you sometimes struggle with staying on track or accomplishing anything productive.”

The patronizing words boiled in Glimmer’s veins and she straightened out to make direct eye contact Weaver. Furious; that’s what Glimmer was. It was obvious Glimmer was working on her project and that should have been easy to tell from where Weaver was crowding her space. She just wanted to embarrass Glimmer and call her out in front of everyone. And that had certainly been accomplished; the entire class was unblinkingly watching them except for the guy two rows ahead who was watching what looked suspiciously like porn. Why didn’t Weaver bother him??

Glimmer’s face continued to grow red as the urge to yell back grew stronger. Unfortunately, the sensation of barbed wire being wrapped around her throat was growing stronger as well and she began praying that she wouldn’t burst into tears in front of everyone.

She was about to retort back something that probably would have gotten her suspended or at least landed her in detention when a voice beside her quipped, “Actually, Ms Weaver, we’ve gotten a lot done!”

Glimmer didn’t even try to hide the incredulous look on her face; why would Adora get involve with this? This had nothing to do with her.

Weaver raised an eyebrow at Glimmer before turning to address Adora, “I’m sure youhave, dear, but you don’t need to cover for your partner if she’s not doing her work.”

Adora’s eyebrows knit together as if she were confused, “No, really! We’ve got a lot done and Glimmer’s been helping with the planning a lot!”

Glimmer couldn’t help but look at her like an idiot. Was she so much of an airhead that she didn’t understand no matter what Glimmer did, Weaver would still pick on her? Had she really never noticed before?!

The glowering teacher strutted away with a final, “Hmm, well don’t work yourself too hard for the sake of your partner; it’s not like she cares but her grade anyways.”

Glimmer shot a scalding glare at her teacher’s back before curling around her notebook once more and again picking up the steady rhythm of pencil strokes on paper.

“I don’t know why she does that,” Adora’s voice startled her out of the space she had settled into inside her own mind, “She has no right and it’s cruel.”

“Yeah, well,” Glimmer snorted without looking up, “that’s what you get when the teacher hates you.”

“It’s not fair though! You get your work done and I knowyour grade is pretty good so-“

Glimmer spun around, “Wait a second, how do youknow anything about my grade?! That’s weird as hell!”

A pink began creeping its way onto Adora’s face again and her eyes widened in shock, “Oh god sorry, that does sound weird! Um let me explain? So sometimes I come after school to grade for Weaver for volunteer hours and I just noticed that you do really well on your tests and I just remembered that when Weaver was, well, basically just calling you lazy just then.”

Glimmer stared at the other girl for a second trying to figure out what the hell was going on for maybe the 50th time that period, “You say that as if it’s supposed to make it less creepy? Why are you paying so much attention to my grades and why do you remember them??”

“Um... just because I thought it was strange that she picked on you so much and didn’t really have a reason to?”

Yup, Adora was, without a doubt, the strangest person Glimmer had ever met.

“I just don’t know how you can like her,” Glimmer muttered under her breath and certainly not expecting a response.

“I don’t!” Adora almost seemed to be laughing.

Glimmer once again shifted from where she had been attempting to resume her work to face Adora (GOD this girl was distracting), “What do you mean you don’t like her?? You’re her favorite!”

“So?! That’s not my fault!” She was definitely laughing now and it made Glimmer mad, hearing what a nice of a sound it was, “I didn’t ask to be her favorite!”

“And I didn’t ask to be her leastfavorite,” Glimmer grimaced in Adora’s direction.

The smile fell from her face, “Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to-“

“Look can we just back to work?!” Glimmer snapped. She didn’t like how personal this conversation was getting; it made an uncomfortable anxiety begin bubbling up somewhere in her stomach that needed to stop right now.

Just as they both scooted in opposite directions, hoping the space between them would dissolve the awkward silence, the bell rang it’s annoying, screechy laugh that always made Glimmer jump.

Adora grabbed her bag and flashed Glimmer a smile that would have been kind or maybe even excited if it were real, “See ya tomorrow!”

Glimmer returned it with a grimace that she hoped conveyed how unfortunate she found that fact before grabbing her things and stomping her way out of the classroom without looking at anyone else.

This project was going to be hell.

80 notes · View notes