#the look beatrice has AFTER ava walks away when she says she's fine and she's not

[whatimdoing-here]

WARRIOR NUN S2 | Ava and Beatrice small Moments.

#warrior nun #avatrice #ava silva #sister beatrice #would you like my commentary? that's too bad they're my tags #i tried to go with smaller less gif-fed moments #like after beatrice calls ava her best friend and that looks they give each other before ava relents #beatrice being more of a grownup and swallowing her pride and being healthy in a relationship which is something i STILL struggle with #how ava knows bea'd been watching her and michael and just looks at her and the GLARE beatrice gives lmao #their general concern and reading each other's minds #the look beatrice has AFTER ava walks away when she says she's fine and she's not #the hot second where beatrice almost gives into ava's alps invitation #after the forehead kiss the slight lean in by ava #how ava is 100000% not okay after going down to meet michael #how ava just collapses into beatrice's neck when they think they're safe #then how mad and how close ava gets to beatrice when she thinks they both bout to die #THEIR FACES WERE SO CLOSE #anyway #mine #mine: warrior nun

[quietblueriver]

Another prompt!

On the edge of consciousness

Quick thing #5.

In which Bea suffers a minor injury and Ava has some trouble dealing. All fluff. Very silly. Thanks for the prompt! :)

-

Ava’s exhausted by the time the van rolls back into Cat’s Cradle. She and Dora had taken six of the newly-official sisters to follow up on reports of some strange behavior in a town in rural France. Ava was hoping they’d find a whole lot of nothing and more than a little wine. What they actually found was eight wraiths and one fun new demon who had hurled himself through one of the cracks that had started appearing after Ava left, apparently a side effect of Adriel yanking Reya into this world, even though she only stayed for like 5 minutes.

It was quite an initiation for the newbies, who did really well all things considered. The whole deal is to make sure they can do this kind of shit without her, because Ava wants to be able to step away from demon-slaying every once in a while to travel the world with her curious, hot, polyglot girlfriend. She’s a teacher now, or whatever, so she didn’t just let loose with the halo when she got annoyed. Instead, she stood there and called out instructions and warnings and made sure none of the babies got maimed or worse and that they didn’t maim or worse any of the possessed. Quite a few halo interventions in the end, but they’re learning.

And the wraiths would have been enough, but of course there was the demon, a real asshole who at one point started sprouting and flinging weird spikes from his back. Ava did a lot of shield throwing and yelling and worked very hard not to intervene unless absolutely necessary. They got him down, in the end, and she finished the job. She’s physically fine but she’s mentally done—she needs sleep and Beatrice. Beatrice, mostly.

They haven’t spoken in three days, which isn’t unusual, unfortunately, but she always hates it. Occasional texts are sometimes the best they can do and she’d sent a few while Dora was driving but hadn’t heard back. Again, not unusual. Bea hates her phone even if she loves Ava (and she does, which she makes clear all the time to everyone and which Ava feels incredibly smug about, thanks) and she’s busy right now with training newbies.

Ava is looking forward to hunting her down in the yard, engaging in only a moderate amount of PDA because “I need them to be able to look me in the eye, Ava, please," and then sleeping for at least 12 hours.

Ava’s hauling her duffel from the back, the rest of the team shuffling inside, when she notices Cam, waiting nearby and fidgeting with her hands, her bottom lip between her teeth.

“Cam?”

Camila…flinches? at Ava’s voice and Ava doesn’t like that one bit. She swings the duffel over her shoulder and walks toward her, frowning.

“Hi, Ava. Welcome home.”

Her voice isn’t peak happy Cam but she’s not upset. Still. “What’s wrong?”

Camila sighs, meets Ava’s eyes. “Okay, most importantly, everyone is fine.” Ava’s heart rate spikes immediately, the halo humming to life. “There was a bit of an accident.”

Ava stares expectantly at her, heart pounding and halo charged, and Camila winces.

“Beatrice was involved.” Seeing Ava’s face, she says again, loudly, “She’s fine! She will be fine! She is in the infirmary and everything is…”

Ava’s off before Camila can finish, dropping her duffel and phasing through the first of the walls between her and the infirmary doors. She has the layout of Cat’s Cradle memorized at this point, after eight months of living here and training here and wandering the hallways when she has nightmares and manages to sneak out without waking Bea, so she has a pretty good idea of where she’s going—straight back and to the right.

She’s barely bothering to let her body fully constitute again, catches two sisters in one of the hallways by surprise and hears a “Holy Father!” before she bleeds through a storage room and turns right down another hall to find herself, finally, at the infirmary doors.

She sees Beatrice propped up in the second bed, privacy curtains mostly open, holding a well-worn copy of The Oresteia, because of course she is, a bandage where an IV line would be on the back of her hand. Her other arm is in a sling, a wrap peeking out from the neckline of the loose gray sweater she’s wearing. She’s awake. She’s sitting up. She has a book. Ava is so relieved she nearly cries.

Beatrice startles obviously when Ava phases through the last door between them, and Ava knows she must be incredibly tired or incredibly stoned or both, maybe, to react that obviously. When she turns her head to face Ava fully, Ava’s jaw clenches tight and she starts forward immediately. The left side of Bea’s face is battered, covered in scrapes and rubbed raw in spots.

Bea seems unbothered, smiling dopily and letting the book fall closed and into her lap so that she can wave excitedly, moving her whole upper body in concert with her hand. She stops the motion quickly, flinching and staring down at her torso like it had broken a promise, brow furrowed in disappointment.

Yeah, so. Stoned it is.

Bea brings her attention back to Ava and the frown disappears as she reaches out, her motion still uncoordinated but less violent. Her palm is up, fingers wiggling expectantly. It’s adorable, but Ava can’t really enjoy it right now.

“Ava! I missed you!”

Ava smiles at her, grabs the wiggling fingers gently between her own and sits on the edge of the bed, leaning over for a chaste kiss. Beatrice, uninhibited and unashamed, hums into it and sighs when they break apart, eyes fluttering and body swaying in a full Disney Princess-esque swoon. The instinct to coo at her like the precious baby duck she is fights with the ongoing panic in her chest and results in what she’s sure is a super fucking weird expression but Bea doesn’t notice or care; she’s all big brown eyes and open adoration.

“Hi, baby. I missed you, too.” She smooths a hand over Beatrice’s hair, newly shorn on the sides (a development that nearly broke Ava in the very best way), the length on top messier than Bea ever lets it be when she’s conscious and outside of their bed. Bea leans into her. “What happened here?”

She frowns, her forehead wrinkling, and Ava smooths the patch of unmarred skin with the tips of her fingers as Bea says guiltily, “Sorry I didn’t call. I didn’t want to make you worried. Just a little accident this morning.”

Ava will deal with that later. She’s not trying to get into it with sweet, stoned Beatrice about when to call. (Always, is the answer, Bea. Always fucking call. There is literally nothing more important.)

Before she can ask about what happened again, though, a flustered Camila hustles through the doors. She hovers uncertainly and then offers, weakly, “She’s okay?” The inflection lets Ava know Camila is aware of what a stupid fucking thing that is to say, but she glares at her anyway, and Camila blanches.

Ava turns back to her girlfriend and asks, resting her hand over Bea’s good one, the IV bandage tacky on her palm, “What kind of accident, gorgeous?”

Beatrice blushes, flips her hand so that she can play with Ava’s fingers, and says, incredibly nonchalantly, “We were practicing an extraction and I got hit by a car.”

Ava’s whole body tenses. The halo hums lowly.

“You got hit by a car.”

Beatrice hums, distracted by Ava’s hand, and then frowns, maybe realizing exactly how fucking awful that sounds. She looks up and adds, as though it will help, “Only a little!”

Camila sighs loudly but keeps her mouth shut.

“You got hit by a car a little.”

Ava works very hard not to lose her shit. She doesn’t want to upset Bea, and the real target for her anger, whoever hit her girlfriend with a car, isn’t in the room right now. She breathes deeply. The halo pulses the littlest bit under her skin in sympathy, still humming quietly enough that only Ava can hear it.

Beatrice offers, as if it might help, “A tap, really.”

“A tap? Beatrice.”

“No big deal. See?” She frees her good hand and uses it to wave up and down her body, flinches when the motion requires her to bend slightly and she’s definitely not making the point she wants to make. Ava catches her hand and holds it still.

“I’m fine.”

“You’re fine.”

The halo hums louder and Ava feels energy start to build under her skin, hot and itchy.

“She should recover quickly. She’s been hurt a lot worse.”

Ava snaps her head back to look at Camila, both eyebrows up and mouth open a little disbelievingly. Because yes, Bea is going to be fine, but this nonchalance? About getting hit by a car? Nope. Nope. Nope. How is Ava supposed to leave, like, ever if this is how her girlfriend and her best friend approach what looks like one step down from vehicular manslaughter? Fine. Jesus Christ.

“Gee, thanks, Cam. Have you been taking bedside manner lessons from Lilith?”

Camila blushes but Ava’s attention is quickly drawn back to Beatrice, who is nodding in agreement with Camila, or trying to. The drugs aren’t doing her any favors on that front, so the movement gets away from her, less decisive and more drowsy and drunken. The effect is something between a puppy trying to keep itself awake and Mother Superion on the rare occasions she stays for game night (or, once and memorably, karaoke) and indulges in one glass of wine too many. Like both a puppy and Superion, Bea begins to sway, eyes closing, and Ava puts a steadying hand on her uninjured shoulder. She gets a grateful smile when Beatrice settles back into the pillow.

As if sensing that she’s about to start again with her questions—which, despite what the two idiots in the room with her apparently think, are absolutely reasonable and pretty fucking chill relative to the information she has—Beatrice says, voice a slightly slurred and incredibly exaggerated mimic of the one she uses when training recruits or doing serious OCS things, “It could’ve been much worse. She wasn’t even going that fast.”

Camila groans and the halo thrums and Ava adjusts on the bed, gentle but unable to stay still any longer.

“It could’ve…” Ava splutters. “She wasn’t…she wasn’t even going that fast?”

Ava hates the word shrill. It’s misogynist as fuck and used to invalidate women’s feelings and police their tone. Bullshit. But she won’t deny that the pitch of her voice is rising higher and higher with each piece of information. She reaches for a metaphor Bea would appreciate. She’s a tea kettle about to go full whistle. She’s a tea kettle about to explode.

She takes a deep breath, counts, exhales. Does it again. Okay. Okay. It’s not helpful for her to blow up. She’s been too hard on Camila. She needs to know what happened and what Bea needs. That’s what matters.

Bea’s clearly working to keep her eyes open. New strategy. She takes the deepest breath yet, presses a very soft kiss to Beatrice’s uninjured knuckles, Bea humming and closing her eyes fully.

“Sleep, baby. I’m just going to talk to Cam. I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

“Promise?” Sleepy brown eyes blink open at her and she’s nearly pouting and Ava’s got a whole lot of feelings right now, but love pushes to the top easy, easy, easy when she looks at Bea.

“Promise.”

Her voice is calm even if it is still much higher than normal as she looks to Cam and asks, “What happened?”

Camila steps closer, hesitant, and Ava consciously works to relax her shoulders. She says, standing and reaching to pull Camila into a hug, “Sorry I was a bitch. I’m,” she glances at Beatrice, whose eyes are closed again, “I had to take care of all of the baby nuns and I’m a little exhausted and it’s Bea and I just…”

Cam hugs her tighter and wipes a tear from Ava’s cheek. She hadn’t even realized she’d been crying. She’s fucking tired.

“I understand. It’s okay.”

Beatrice makes a soft noise, and Cam smiles at her fondly. “They gave her more medicine just before you got back. I’m honestly surprised she’s still awake.”

“Mmm.” Ava steps back a little and shakes it out, folds her shoulders back.

“It really was an accident. Beatrice was helping a novice in a drill with a moving extraction, and the driver was a little overeager, and, well, Beatrice got knocked back with some force. She dislocated her shoulder and has some nasty road rash, but, as you can see, they’ve given her medication, and she should recover relatively quickly.” Camila bites her lip for a moment. “I promise she’s okay, Ava. I would’ve called you immediately if anything serious had happened. I’ll always call, even if Beatrice won’t.”

She uncoils a bit more. She knows it’s true. There’s no way that Cam wouldn’t call her or send Lilith to come get her, if things got really bad.

A tiny, sleepy noise escapes Beatrice, and Ava blows out a breath, smiles at Camila. Beatrice is fine. Beatrice will be fine.

She eyes the sling and wonders how long she’ll need to wear it. Bea’s going to hate being on the bench. The newbies are going to hate it, too.

Underneath the totally reasonable anger, she feels almost bad for whoever it was who hit Bea. She’s pretty beloved, even if she won’t admit it, and it’s no secret that Ava can be a little, uh, overprotective. The kid’s probably having a rough time.

“I know we’re avoiding another Yasmine situation, but clearly there’s some work left to do on teaching the novices left to drive.”

Camila frowns and begins to respond, but they’re interrupted by the familiar hiss of Lilith’s arrival, the black wings folding behind her a ridiculous contrast with the bulging M&S bag in her hand, the top of a green Colin the Caterpillar box peeking out of the top. Ava bites back a smile. What a fucking softie.

She lets go of the glamour that she wears in public, her skin mottling with scales as she removes her sunglasses. She reels back slightly when she catches sight of Ava but recovers quickly, thrusting the bag out in front of her without a word. Ava takes it, catches sight of candy and biscuits and a tin of fancy tea.

“Thanks, Lil. She’ll be excited about these.”

Her eyes turn to her shoes, black boots identical to Bea’s favorites, says gruffly, “How’s she doing?”

“She’ll be fine.”

Camila smiles at her and Ava lifts a shoulder, moves to unload the bag on the table next to Bea’s bed. Beatrice, apparently still awake enough to notice Ava’s presence, reaches a hand out and rests it on Ava’s thigh, whispers something that Ava is almost totally sure is nonsense. She doesn’t try to decipher, kisses her cheek before before going back to her mission, rifling though the considerable stash Lilith brought and beginning to pull things out.

“You’re being much calmer about this than I anticipated.”

Ava snorts and looks up at Lilith, whose eyes are focused on the injured side of Beatrice’s face.

“Yeah, no. I lost my shit for a bit there. Cam took the brunt of it.” She turns her eyes to Camila. “Sorry again.”

There’s not enough room on the table for everything—Lilith really wasn’t fucking around—so Ava prioritizes Bea’s favorites.

“Like, I’m obviously not delighted and I’m definitely going to have a talk with Bea about when to call me, say, for example, when she gets hit by a car, but she’ll be okay.” She tucks what won’t fit on the table into the little drawer below and brushes some of Bea’s hair back. “Also, stoned Beatrice is super cute.”

Lilith’s shadow falls across Bea’s body, and Ava turns to see the sharp line of her jaw clenched, her eyes scanning Bea’s body and lingering on her shoulder.

“It really was an accident.”

It’s said absently, her voice soft as she leans even further forward to tuck a corner of Bea’s blanket a little tighter around her. Ava’s stomach swoops with fondness, and she reaches her own hand out to squeeze at Lilith’s bicep, black scales and warm skin a strange contrast on her palm.

“Yeah, Cam told me. It’s fine. I mean, someone’s getting a talk from me, because what the fuck, but…”

Ava halts at a hum from the bed. Beatrice is clearly just on the edge of consciousness, eyes straining open before fluttering closed again, words barely coherent. Barely coherent, but coherent enough.

“Don’t be mad, love. Lilith is usually a very good driver.”

#warrior nun #avatrice #sister beatrice #ava silva #warrior nun fic #sister camila #wn prompt fic

[kendrene]

for ur road-trip prompts! avatrice + downtime

I'm not sure this is what you had in mind, but I hope you like it.

***

“Do you relax, like, ever?” 

At first, Ava thinks that Beatrice hasn’t heard. She pushes the book First Enchanter Jillian has given her to read aside - some stuffy old treatise about the dangers of fire magic, no doubt written by an even stuffier mage, long dead - and focuses her entire attention on the Templar by the door.

“Did you hear what I said?” 

“I heard you.” There’s a slight change in her posture. Not something Ava would call loosening. She’s never seen Beatrice’s spine be anything less than ramrod-straight. “I’m not sure I understand.” 

“Oh, come on Bea.” The book thuds shut, and a small cloud of dust lifts from the yellowed pages. Ava blinks back tears. “Surely there are things you do in your free time?”

“It is my duty to ensure nothing happens to you, Ava.” Or that Ava doesn’t happen to somebody, but Beatrice is too polite to say. “Besides, I do not mind it.”

Ava lowers  her eyes, pretending to examine the grain of the table she’s sat at. She’s glad that it’s late evening, and the square of sky outside the stained-glass window is pitch dark. Glad that the reading alcove she chose - her favorite in the whole library - isn’t particularly well lit. 

The blush heating her face takes about a century to fade.

“I don’t mind that it’s you watching over me.” Ava breathes out, not meaning to, so close to the surface of the table she can picture the words like another layer of varnish upon the worn wood. There’s another shift, a creak of leather. An inhale so subtle Ava thinks she must have imagined it. She doesn’t look up.

“Anyway,” Beatrice resumes after some time, voice uncharacteristically unsteady, “of course I do things in my free time.” She falters a little over the word free, as though her tongue doesn’t quite know what to do with it. “I train.”

“Seriously.” Ava snorts. “That doesn’t count as a relaxing activity.” Her eyes flick up, just in time to catch Beatrice’s frown. It deepens as she watches, and Ava has to fight the urge to go to her. To reach out, and stroke a thumb between Beatrice’s knitted eyebrows gently, smooth whatever’s bothersome away. She cannot. Ava has no name for the things that flicker in her chest when Beatrice is near, but knows the desires that they elicit are forbidden. “You don’t have hobbies? Wait, are Templars actually allowed to have hobbies?” 

“Ava.” Somewhere at the far end of the library a door opens and they both go quiet. Templars and mages are allowed to talk, obviously, but what they’re doing skirts closer to fraternization. Itcould land them in a lot of trouble. 

They wait in complete silence until it’s clear nobody is coming. Ava slumps in her seat. 

“Fine.” She plucks at the left sleeve of her robe, tugging at a thread that’s coming loose. “Let me rephrase, because clearly we’re not getting anywhere. What do you do if you’re not on duty or training?” 

“I meditate.”

“Beatrice.” Ava says with the tone of someone about to break horrible news. “I’m sorry to tell you, but I don’t think you know how to unwind.”

“Meditation is the getaway to a steady heart and a calm mind.” 

“So, basically if you’re not standing guard or training, you’re falling asleep.”

“That’s not at all what-!” Beatrice sputters, indignant, and crosses her arms. “Alright. What about you, then? What do you do if you’re not-”

“-reading awfully boring books?” Stretching, Ava stands and walks over to the window. Her reflection stares right back, a blackened mirror-image distorted by the imperfections in the glass. “The gardens. I love walking barefoot on the grass right after it rains. And there’s fish in the pond, did you know? Sometimes the cooks let me have a heel of old bread to feed them.” 

It sounded grander in her mind than it does as she speaks of it to Beatrice, but Ava goes on undeterred. Maybe, to someone who could leave the Circle anytime the gardens don’t seem much. They’re everything to her. “Have you ever really walked through them? I don’t mean on your way to the barracks and back. Have you ever really paid attention to how much the trees shake when a storm wind comes in from the lake? Or to what kind of birds nest in the old oak depending on the season?”

“I can’t say that I have.” Beatrice answers slowly, like she’s trying to see the gardens as Ava does. “All of it sounds beautiful, though.”

“It is!” Ava turns around, seized by a wild thought. “Come on, I’ll show you.”

“Curfew-”

“The bell rang not too long ago. We have about an hour until compline.”

“Still-”

“We’ll be careful.” Beatrice’s expression is doubtful, but the moment Ava offers her hand she takes it without question. “I promise.”

//

“What do you think?” 

Ava had decided the moment they got out to leave the well tended gravel paths behind and plunge straight into the tangle of trees at the heart of the gardens. It was the only way, she’d reasoned, to show Beatrice what she meant. 

“It’s pretty, don’t you think?”

This clearing at the feet of the old oak is her favorite spot in the gardens. Even better than the pond, except perhaps early in the spring, when the mallards’ eggs hatch and ducklings bob back and forth across the tranquil waters. 

Beatrice steps under the shadow of the tree, free hand outstretched, reaching to press her palm against the weathered trunk. “I run past this place sometimes, during drills. I never stopped to take it in before, though.” She pulls back, staring down at her fingers as if the tree has left its mark there. “You were right, Ava. Thank you.”

Ava’s fingers, still curled loosely around Bea’s, twitch. She’s surprised Beatrice hasn’t tried to reclaim her hand yet, but is sure she would in a heartbeat should Ava allow her grip to grow too tight. She’s taken care to keep her hold as-barely-there, to trap Beatrice’s fingers the same as she would a fragile bird. Has held her breath whenever their hands bumped awkwardly together on their walk to this place, afraid a sudden jolt, some nervous movement may cause Bea to fly away from her.

“Thank you, Ava.” Beatrice says again, and flips their hands over, thumb stroking at the tender dip of Ava’s inner wrist, her fingers squeezing, Ava finds she cannot breathe.

‘There’s more.” Ava can hear her own pulse in her ears, can feel it reverberate like the aftermath of a spell down her spine and the rest of her. Down her arms, to where Bea’s thumb is idly rubbing, the one place of her body that’s become the axis of her world for the time being. She’s sure that Beatrice can sense it too as it thunders in her grasp and wonders what she may be thinking. Clouds roll in, wrapping around the moon. Darkness shrouds the two of them entire, making it impossible to tell. 

“More?” 

Beatrice is close enough her next exhale is unadulterated warmth on Ava’s cheek. 

She clears her throat. 

“Yeah. Uhm. Let’s sit.” 

They carefully lower themselves in the hollow dug up by the oak’s gnarled roots. Here the ground is soft and a bit spongy, a carpet of dead leaves and sticks and all manner of debris blown in by the breeze. 

“Look.’ Ava points, and Bea’s gaze tilts up, as though Ava’s finger is tied to an invisible string that goes straight to her heart. “I shouldn’t tell you this, since you’re a Templar and all, but sometimes I can’t sleep and I sneak out after curfew to look at the stars.” 

Beatrice bumps their shoulders together. 

“I have a feeling asking you not do that would equal wasted breath.” She lets go of Ava’s hand only to place hers higher up, around Ava's forearm. It’s cold enough that Ava is wearing another layer under her robes, and still it feels like Beatrice is touching her directly. Ava burns hotter than a thousand suns. “Will you try to be careful about it? If Shannon or Mary caught you, it wouldn’t not be too big a deal. But others will not be as kind.”

“I promise.” 

“Okay.” The clouds part, and stray moonlight spears down from above to show that Beatrice doesn’t quite believe her.

“I really do promise to be careful, Beatrice.” Ava repeats. It isn’t as convincing as she’d like and they both know it is a lie.

“Maybe we could make a deal.” Beatrice pauses, jaw working around whatever it is that she’s gonna suggest next. Her lower lip is caught between her teeth, and her dark eyes are pensive the same way they get when Knight-Commander Suzanne presents her with some complicated question about faith. 

Not that Ava has made a whole study of the countless expressions that flit across Beatrice’s face at any hour of the day, filing all of them inside her mind for reference. So that she knows what Beatrice thinks or feels even though to anyone else it seems that she gives nothing away. 

“A deal?” Ava squeezes her eyes shut, hating how badly her voice shakes.

“I could accompany you on these walks.” She opens her eyes. Beatrice looks deadly serious. "Before curfew.”

Ava swallows. 

“Of course.”

“I would need to ask for permission.”

“Uh. Uh,”

“But I don’t see why the Knight-Commander would say no. Exercise is important.”

“Totally, yeah.” Ava blinks, and the full import of what Beatrice is saying finally sinks in. “Wait, you’re really willing to do that for me?”

For the first time that night, Beatrice’s lips curve into a smile. Ava can count the instances this has happened on the fingers of one hand with room to spare. She clutches the fleeting sight to her chest, stores it in the same place in which she keeps the rest. Beatrice smiling broadly after Shannon had complimented her sword form. Beatrice laughing at one of Mary’s quips, a hand raised to cover the full extent of it. 

Beatrice smiling at her - for her - the day Ava had managed to light a candle through her magic without it melting away. 

“I will ask tomorrow.” A loon calls from across the lake, and Beatrice’s eyes track skyward, measuring time. “I can accompany you on your walks and you can teach me how to… unwind.” On the verge of a bigger smile, her mouth quivers. Beatrice swallows it down, and Ava vows to work it out of her somehow. 

Ava nods.

“That sounds fair.” She breathes in, filling her lungs to bursting with air and with courage, and adds. "A little earlier, I could show you the ducklings."

"You could." Beatrice's smile, much like the moon overhead, is in its waning phase. It lingers, however, a sliver of a reflection in her eyes. "I'd like that."

#warrior nun #avatrice #ava x beatrice #ava silva #sister beatrice #dragon age au #dren writes

[sunsafewriting]

Do A Flip - chapter 4 excerpt (full chapter will be finished and uploaded soon).

Lilith.

“— so Bea and I are gonna get a place together,” Ava concludes happily, moving her little figurine four places and handing Camila literally all of her money, because Camila now owns both blue hotels. “Which is cool, right?” 

It’s actually fucking ridiculous, but no one at the table will say so. Even Lilith, because Shannon, Mary, and Camila are all glaring at her, like she can’t be trusted to keep her mouth shut. Which she can, thank you very much. 

If Ava and Beatrice want to escalate their bullshit, that’s their business. As long as Lilith is never expected to set foot inside their apartment, then Lilith will continue her reluctant detente with Ava. No matter what Shannon says, it is a detente unless Lilith actually hits Ava. Threatening her doesn’t count. 

And — fine. Lilith can admit that Ava’s not the worst person out there, She’s too energetic and too annoying and has such a bad sense of humour that Lilith has taken to just walking away if she so much as starts to look vaguely amused, but Ava’s not as irresponsible as Lilith first took her for. She shows up for the kid, and she shows up for Beatrice. And so Lilith has begrudgingly afforded Ava a spot on the list of people she’ll actually spend time around. Only if her company is diluted by the presence of others, of course; Lilith’s not going to do anything crazy, like hang out with her one-on-one. 

“That is very cool,” Camila replies, adding Ava’s cash to the small mountain already piled up in front of her. 

Ava takes two fifties from Beatrice’s stash — utterly blatant in her cheating, utterly unbothered by it. “It’s a loan, Bea. I’ll pay you back.” 

“I’m sure.”

“Anyway, it’ll suck that we won’t be neighbours anymore,” Ava says to Camila, “but I can come visit. And you can come over to our place whenever.” 

Somehow, Shannon must actually see the words just make sure you knock form in Lilith’s mind, because she nudges Mary, who kicks Lilith under the table. 

“Are you staying in the area?” Shannon asks smoothly. 

“Everything’s here, like Bea’s uni and St Michael’s, so we’re gonna try.” 

“I talked to the landlord about keeping our apartment, but he wants to turn it into an AirBnB,” Beatrice adds, with no small amount of judgement in her voice. 

Lilith has already heard Beatrice’s lecture about rental policies and tenant protection. Ava has, too. At least they were all in the car together at the time, which meant that Lilith wasn’t subjected to that look Ava gets on her face when Beatrice really starts in on a tangent about something. 

“It’s a shit market,” Mary agrees. “You’ve got to know someone.”

There’s a general grumbling of agreement. 

Lilith sighs. “I know someone,” she admits. If her mother could see Lilith now, offering something without getting anything in return — not even a signed agreement preventing Ava from practically sitting in Beatrice’s lap when they do movie nights — she’d disown her. “Neil from my Thursday class is going back to the States, so he needs someone to take over his lease. His street is close to the kid. And your stupid bar.” 

All of them turn to her. 

She shrugs, uncomfortable, then bails, going back to the kitchen to pour herself another drink. At least Mary keeps good gin here. 

Because no good deed goes unpunished, Ava follows after her, smiling entirely too much like someone who thinks Lilith is being nice to her, and not enough like someone who appreciates that Lilith was only trying to avoid having to listen to Ava complain. 

“You could really set that up?” Ava asks. 

“Yes.” 

Neil has never said no to Lilith. But then, that’s a power she has over most people. It’s probably something to do with being tall and hot and smart and accomplished. 

“That would be very, very awesome of you.” 

“Mm.” 

Ava, with unprecedented audacity, takes the bottle of gin right out of Lilith’s hands. 

“What are you —”

“Hush. You’ll like it,” she says, grabbing a few other things from the cupboard and carefully pouring it all into the cup. 

Lilith allows this, even if only because Ava’s confidence in her bartending could stand to be taken down a peg — Beatrice has been brainwashed by Ava’s outfits; there’s no way her drinks are that good, if you’re not distracted by the low-cut tops — and Lilith is giving herself a freebie to be a bit mean. 

Ava finishes mixing her elaborate nonsense and hands the cup back to Lilith, watching her expectantly. 

Lilith takes a sip. 

It’s really fucking excellent, and she’s not fast enough to stop pleasant surprise from showing on her face. 

“Ha!” Ava crows, smacking her hand against the countertop. “You like it. And you like me.” 

“I don’t like you,” Lilith bites back. “I like Beatrice. And Diego.”

Beatrice is always going to be a sister to her, in the way that Lilith understands sisters: as people whose stupidity you tolerate because a part of you is contingent on their presence in your life; people who understand you, sometimes too much. And Diego — well, one time, he’d let her trick Ava into leaning against wet paint, and she’d returned the favour by letting him tell her about underground turtles, so that’s something. 

But Ava is undeterred. “They’re my favourite people, so you liking them means that I like you. Too bad.” 

Lilith takes another sip of her drink. It doesn’t miraculously drop in quality, and Ava remains regrettably gleeful. “I could squash you.”

“I know.” 

Lilith hates how certain Ava seems that she won’t. 

-

Here's the link to the earlier chapters if you're interested: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43728831

#on god i am going to reply to the comments on ch4 as they made my life im just slow #anyway thanks to everyone who is reading ! #the new chap is 13.4k now rip so that's why it's taking so mf long #and yet i still didn't manage to fit any plot in #sunsafewriting #avatrice

[spaceman-earthgirl]

Ok so imagine if the halo responds to Ava's emotions, and when Beatrice holds her she tries to play it cool but the halo just starts glowing brightly.

This kind of took on a life of its own so I hope you like the direction I took it in. I want to write more for this idea, it was fun. You can read this on ao3 too.

---

Ava is screwed. Totally, completely, one hundred percent screwed. And why is she screwed, you may ask? Oh, just the little fact that she’s definitely falling in love with Beatrice.

And why is that bad?

One, Ava is a nun which means that absolutely nothing can happen between them, Beatrice has taken her vows, and Ava respects that. That’s not the main issue though, the second reason she’s screwed, and the one that’s going to get her in trouble, is that despite her best to control it, the halo is starting to glow whenever she’s around Beatrice, and it’s really fucking embarrassing.

She’s come to terms with the first part, she’s a little sad about it, but despite all the shit she’s been through since she first came back to life, she’s the happiest she’s ever been when she’s with Beatrice, and if they’ll only ever be friends, then Ava can accept that.

(Okay, maybe she hasn’t quite accepted it, but she’s trying).

The second part though, there’s not a lot Ava can do when all it takes is one smile from Beatrice for butterflies to erupt in her stomach, one small touch, or even one amused eye roll, for the halo to start pulsing in her back and Ava desperately trying to calm down so the halo doesn’t glow too brightly and give her away.

At least after the first time it happened, no demons appeared, so she doesn’t have that part to worry about, or else they’d all be screwed.

It gets even worst after Adriel gets free and then it’s just the two of them in Switzerland and there’s not a lot to distract Ava from her still growing feelings.

---

It doesn’t take much, like Ava said, for the halo to react now when she’s around Beatrice. Which isn’t ideal, because again, she doesn’t want to give her feelings away, but she also doesn’t want to give them away, they are meant to be hiding, after all.

And it certainly doesn’t help when Ava walks into their room, to find Beatrice wearing a button-down shirt, a far cry from her usual outfits. It’s stupidly cute and Ava feels the halo pulse at her back as warm affection floods her chest.

Beatrice notices too, instantly on alert.

At least she just notices the glowing part, she’s pretty sure Beatrice hasn’t noticed the feelings part yet, which is hard enough to hide without the giveaway on her back. She knows she stares sometimes, knows she smiles too wide, knows that some of the other people in the bar have already noticed too.

“Ava,” Beatrice says, voice low, looking for a weapon and an escape and no doubt calculating every possible thing that she thinks is about to happen.

“It’s fine,” Ava says, hands instantly falling to Beatrice’s arms, sees how the touch immediately calms her. Though, she still looks worried.

Maybe they should be worried, maybe one day this’ll be the reason that demons find them, the reason Adriel finds the halo, because Ava just can’t control her feelings because Beatrice is just too pretty.

“No demons, see? It’s just…been doing that recently, maybe something to do with Adriel?”

“I should contact Mother Superion, see if she knows what’s happening or if anything has changed.”

“No!” Ava says, much too loud. “It’s okay, look, it’s stopped.” Ava turns to show Beatrice her back and it has stopped, only because she’s embarrassed about the possibility of more people discovering her little secret.

Beatrice still looks concerned, and rightly so, Ava is pretty sure Beatrice can tell she’s lying, but she drops it for now at least.

---

They’re dancing. They’re dancing and drinking and Ava is having more fun than she’s had in a long time.

Bonus, Beatrice won’t stop touching her.

And Ava’s not going to miss an opportunity to be as close to Beatrice as possible.

Beatrice’s laugh is infectious, her innocence when it comes to drinking adorable, her puns top tier, and Ava can feel herself falling deeper with every moment they spend together.

Of course, it’s a prime opportunity for the halo to start glowing, though it’s really not her fault. Or not entirely her fault at least. Because Beatrice’s hand is on her neck, because their bodies are close, their fingers tangled together as they dance.

The alcohol isn’t helping at all either.

Ava feels warm all over, hot where Beatrice is touching her, or where her own hands touch Beatrice, and maybe they should stop, not draw attention to themselves, but right now, as Ava watches Beatrice dance, how free and happy she looks, Ava’s never wanted anything more, never wanted a moment to last forever like this one, and she’s not about to put a stop to it.

Ava just hopes that everyone in the bar is drunk enough, that the flashing of the lights is enough to make anyone think it’s just a trick of the light that Ava’s back is glowing.

It does stop though, when Beatrice takes her hand and tugs her from the bar, Ava easily following.

She’d follow Beatrice anywhere.

“You’re glowing again,” Beatrice says, looking around. Luckily the street outside is deserted, no people (or demons) in sight. “You need to be more careful.”

“I can’t help it, it must be Adriel,” Ava lies. Or at least half of it is a lie because she can’t help it at all, but it’s definitely not Adriel. The light does dim a bit, but not completely, because Beatrice is still holding her hand and she can remember how Beatrice looked dancing, an image that’s going to be permanently etched into her brain forever.

Beatrice watches her carefully, which really doesn’t help much, because the concern and fear is clear in her expression. But Ava breathes a sigh of relief when Beatrice drops it.

She’s not sure how much longer she can keep this up, not when Beatrice is still holding her hand, not when touches like this have become commonplace, not when the way Beatrice looks at her sometimes makes Ava wonder if maybe she’s not the only one whose feelings have grown into something more than strictly platonic.

---

Ava’s still not quite used to sharing a bed with someone else, but she’s also not going to complain at all about her current situation.

Her current situation being Beatrice pressed close to her in sleep, head tucked under Ava’s chin, arm securely wrapped around her waist.

Ava can feel the halo hot in her back, lighting up the room around them.

Right now, she doesn’t quite care.

It had taken them a while to get used to the whole sharing a bed thing, Beatrice insisting on Ava taking the bed alone until Ava had to physically pull Beatrice to bed with her.

It had been a few nights of sleeping rigid, all to aware of the other person beside them. The whole Adriel thing hadn’t helped with falling asleep so it had been mostly sleepless nights at the beginning, and awkward mornings, until something had shifted, Ava relaxing more and in turn Beatrice too, and now nights like this are common, seeking each other out in unconsciousness.

Though Beatrice is usually the one to wake first, Ava enjoying this morning even more because she gets Bea like this, soft and warm and hers, even if it’s just for a few minutes.

She wiggles out of Beatrice’s hold, not wanting her to be embarrassed about how closely she’d cuddled up to Ava during her sleep. Beatrice doesn’t seek out touch as much as Ava does (when she’s conscious at least) but it is something she’s been doing more and more, and Ava loves every touch.

Beatrice stirs not long later and Ava fights the glow at her back, but it’s hard when sleepy eyes blink open to look over at her. Beatrice looks stunning, even with bedhead and a confused frown on her face. It’s made even more special by the fact that she knows no one else gets to see Beatrice like this.

“Morning,” Ava smiles, enjoying the tilt of Beatrice’s lips when she smiles too.

“You’re up early.”

“I thought I’d go for a swim before work,” Ava says, dropping to sit back down on her side of the bed. It’s a half truth, she’s up now so she may as well go for a swim. Ava pokes Beatrice’s side, gets the little wiggle as Beatrice tries to get away from her that Ava had been hoping for.

The halo pulses at her back.

God, Ava really loves her.

“Do you want to join me?” Ava asks, to distract them both from the glow.

Beatrice sits up, looking more serious than she should at a question about going for an early morning swim. “You know I know what that means, right?”

“What, what means?” Ava asks, confused by the sudden turn in the conversation.

Beatrice points to where the halo is very clearly glowing. “That.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Ava says, playing dumb, while inside she’s panicking. This is not how it was meant to come out, though Ava’s not sure exactly how it was meant to. She’d been planning on hiding it forever, though Beatrice is too smart for that, it was bound to come out eventually.

“It happened with Shannon too, when Mary was around.”

Ava freezes, she hadn’t thought about that.

“I was unsure for a long time, that I was reading it correctly,” Beatrice starts, voice even, but refusing to look at Ava now as she speaks. “And then with every excuse you made, I let it go, because I was scared. But the world is getting worse and Adriel is growing in power and we might not have much time left.” Beatrice says, the halo getting brighter when Bea finally turns to look at her. She reaches out and brushes a hand over Ava’s shoulder, fingers touching the top of the halo. It burns and Ava feels so alive. “I know you love me,”

Ava’s breath catches, but her feelings are obvious as the halo’s glow gets brighter.

“You know?”

“Even without the halo, it’s pretty obvious how you feel about me. And for a long time I pretended I didn’t see it, pretended I didn’t feel the same, but I want you to know that I love you too.”

Ava acts, because she’s never been good at thinking first, and she leans forward, lips pressing against Beatrice’s. Beatrice is frozen for a moment, but Ava doesn’t have time to worry she’s made a mistake when Beatrice melts under the touch, lips so soft and gentle as hands cup her face.

“Bea,” Ava sighs into the kiss, her whole body alight with the feel of Beatrice’s mouth against her own, the touch electric and comforting and perfect.

When they pull apart, Ava has to fight the urge to just lean in and kiss Beatrice again.

“I love you,” Ava says, wanting to say the words herself, needing Beatrice to know exactly how she feels, even though apparently she’s known for a while. Which, again, is embarrassing, but her obvious feelings, and the glow of the halo, helped her get a kiss from the girl she loves, so maybe a little embarrassment isn’t the worst thing in the world.

“We’re going to have to do something about that,” Beatrice says, the light behind her so bright now, there’d be no hiding it in public.

“This is your fault,” Ava smiles, earning an eye roll, but Beatrice is poorly trying to conceal her smile too. “It is,” Ava insists, reaching out to tuck a loose strand of hair behind Beatrice’s ear. Beatrice leans into the touch and Ava’s heart stutters, the glow behind her brightening. “See,” Ava says, her words faltering slightly when Beatrice cups the hand lingering on her cheek and turns to press a kiss to Ava’s palm. “Your fault.”

“I think you’ll find that-“

Ava doesn’t let her finish, cutting Beatrice off with another kiss. There’s a lot of scary shit going on in the world right now and she knows sooner or later they’re going to have to face it, they’re going to have to take down Adriel and save the world, but right now she’s going to kiss the girl she loves, enjoy what they have right now, while they still have it.

And when the time comes, with Bea by her side, she’s sure they can do anything together.

#warrior nun #avatrice #ask #anon #ava silva #sister beatrice

[birgittesilverbae]

thinking of babea au and the shanmary honeymoon.

camping out and mary lying with shannon’s head just beneath the upward wings of her ribs. night sky sneaking through the canopy like a tongue into a mouth.

shannon turning her head, drowsy and drunk with the trees plummeting up around them, making a short satisfied noise and mary looking. she feels just then like every move she makes is only a prelude to looking at shannon.

wind-up lantern lighting her on one side, fire on the other. this woman who has always marked a boundary, who has on occasion been a ghost. here, solid, making each breath a little more difficult with the place she has chosen for a pillow. her ear pressed to mary’s abdomen, humming, and mary like ‘whatcha doing?’

‘i’m listening to them.’

‘what?’

‘your abs.’

and the pair of them laughing - easy, easy - with the taste of cheap rosé lingering on their teeth. tasting it when they kiss, which is often. a prayer too private for god.

walks on the beach in good weather, bad weather, and shannon hunting smooth pebbles out of the sand with her toes while mary takes a picture of her silhouetted against the ocean. the sliver of scar tissue peeking out from her tank top, those ones you always see women wear when they’re out jogging, though shan’s wearing swim trunks to match, dark blue verging into green. (phthalo, she thinks, and tears away from the association)

but it’s fine. she takes the picture and puts her arms around shannon’s waist, feels her lean back. other scars on her arms, on her stomach, from fighting after she lost the halo. gave it away.

you gave it away and you took me

mary remembers sitting stunned in the back of the van pressing gauze into a laceration, sopping up the blood until the backs of her hands and the skin on her wrists felt damp. a grin, sly as a fishhook in the near dark, in the screech of lilith’s stressed driving. shannon putting her gentle hands over mary’s and saying in the strong soft voice she reserved for the injured, ‘keep going. it won’t fix itself.’

how mary broke down then, tipping forward, keeping the pressure on the wound but still dabbing her forehead with blood. anointing. the sound of tires on asphalt muted by the reverberation of shannon saying without speaking: fix me. heal me. nothing else can. no halo like a noose inside her body waiting to creep up around her neck.

bea in the front seat - shotgun. their place, my place, our place - with her hand fisted in lilith’s shirt and lilith grabbing it back in the moments between shifting gears. one hand on the steering wheel, one hand on beatrice.

a picture on the beach of a scar peeking out, and bea far away staring at it on her phone screen. mary’s laconic words beneath it, ‘she’s too damn photogenic.’ and, tucked underneath it, the words: she’s the entire beach. she’s the horizon.

tracing that shimmer of the past with her thumb, thinking of ava’s smile. books on summer evenings. wondering if she’ll ever make it so far, to somewhere as merciful as a beach where the whole sky can’t overshadow the person she loves. where the ocean is just a thing that exists to sit behind her and pick out the profile of her jaw, the colors of her clothes. beatrice who spent her whole life reaching for revenge seeing what might lie further than that, and wondering if she’ll reach it.

#ask #'anon' #idk if i want to kiss u or kill u what the fuck #warrior nun #babea au #mary x shannon #The working brain does not have write access permission but know that I'm going to Liam Neeson in Taken your ass

[call-me-maggie13]

She’s fine. Beatrice is fine.

She just took a week off to help with Diana. She can’t afford to miss any more lectures. It doesn’t matter how many meals her body rejects or how terribly her bones ache. It doesn’t even matter that she’s already sweat through her shirt in the twenty minute commute from her apartment to her university.

Because she is fine. She’s not sick. She can’t be sick. Not now. She can be sick this weekend. When she doesn’t have classes. Yes, she’ll do that. She’ll be sick this weekend and be fine now.

"Ms. Beatrice, I want you to know I mean this respectfully, but you look like shit. Go home." Dr. Superion doesn’t let her past her desk, slaps her cane across the walkway to block Beatrice’s path.

"I’m fine." Her head is stuffed with cotton, everything is muffled and her brain is about to start oozing out of her ears.

"Do not make me call your wife. Go home."

"She’s not - " Dr. Superion is already dialing Ava’s number, how she knows it is a mystery Beatrice would want to solve were she not currently withholding her breakfast’s second coming.

"She said she’ll pick you up here. Sit." She rolls her chair around the desk, forces Beatrice into it and rolls her into the hall. Beatrice watches her curiously. "I don’t do well with sick. Don’t try to come back until you’re better. I’ll send you the slides from the lectures you miss."

Beatrice drops her head into her hands, elbows digging into her knees as she takes long, slow breaths to steady her stomach. She digs the heel of her hands into her eyes in an attempt to relieve the pressure behind them.

It doesn’t help.

"Bea-Bea!" Tiny feet patter around the corner and a little body launches into her chest, the sudden movement sloshing her insides uncomfortably but she hugs Diana back regardless.

"Hey, what’s wrong? Can you walk?" Ava brushes the back of her hand over Beatrice’s forehead and her cheek, the fingers pulling away damp. "Come on, let’s get you home so you can sleep."

Beatrice is fine. She can walk herself. She doesn’t need Ava’s hand on her elbow or arm around her waist to steady her. She doesn’t need Ava to pause every time she whimpers or gasps to make sure she’s alright. She doesn’t need Ava to call off tonight to stay with her. She doesn’t need Ava to tuck her duvet up to her chin and kiss her forehead and tell her she’s going to be okay.

She doesn’t need anything.

But she does like it. In fact, you could say Beatrice loves it.

"Bea?" The bed shifts and she groans. "I made you some tea, maybe it’ll help settle your stomach." Cold fingers against her sweaty forehead. "You’re still burning up, if your fever doesn’t break soon - "

"I’m fine." The words made her stomach churn and she takes deep, long breaths to try to force it away.

"Just. Take this. It’ll help." Beatrice doesn’t look at the pill Ava hands her, she’s too scared to open her eyes after she’d thrown up the last time she’d tried. Ava helps her sit up, take a sip of the warm tea to wash the medicine down, tucks her back in. "I’m gunna leave the door cracked, call out if you need me, okay?"

She hears the door creak on its hinges, screeching to a near close before footsteps fade away. The television is on, murmuring voices drift down the hall. Diana giggles, blocks tumble, the fan rattles, the air kicks on, Beatrice’s head hums. There’s clattering in the kitchen, dishes moving and hitting each other. Then there’s nothing. There’s warmth and there’s dark and there’s nothing.

The bed shifts again and Beatrice wakes, tiny hands of ice brush against her clammy cheeks and she relishes the cold relief.

"Bea-Bea." Diana is getting so much better at whispering. She’s still too loud and sometimes her voice is too harsh, but she has improved so much and Beatrice can’t help the surge of pride she feels at the nearly successful whisper. "Bea-Bea dying?"

"No, patinho. Just sick." Diana’s hand pushes the hair from her face and her head hits the pillow just beside Beatrice’s.

"Sleepy?" Beatrice nods and the pillow shifts when Diana copies the movement. "Cuddle?"

"Diana, I told you to leave her alone, baby. She’s not feeling well." The blanket shift as Diana is lifted away, Ava offers a quiet apology and they’re gone.

Beatrice curls her fingers around her thumb and she’s asleep again.

Cold toes tuck under Beatrice’s stomach, jolting her awake. She lifts her cotton filled head and cracks one eye to find Diana trying to curl into her side.

"Hi." The little girl giggles. Beatrice doesn’t try to fight the smile.

"Hello." She drops her head back against the pillow and lets her eyes slide closed. "Your mama know where you are?"

"No." Diana whispers and tucks her nose into Beatrice’s shoulder. "I stay?"

Beatrice hums and rolls onto her side, opens her arms to Diana to crawl into.

"Hot hot." Diana presses her cold hands into Beatrice’s cheeks, snuggles closer to her chest. "You wet."

The thin layer of sweat has long since become a waterfall, soaking Beatrice’s shirt and the sheets beneath her and the thin blanket above. She’s cold and hot and wet and sticky and uncomfortable and so, so, so very tired.

"‘m s’rry," Beatrice slurs and shifts away from her. Diana follows.

The door creaks open and Beatrice cracks an eye to find Ava at the edge of the bed with her hands on her hips. Diana is grinning at her dopily, curled into Beatrice’s sweaty embrace. Ava tries to reason with the toddler, explain that Beatrice needs to sleep and that she feels "icky." Diana doesn’t care.

Beatrice doesn’t either.

"Ava," She pauses at her name. "She can stay."

"Bea…"

"You too?" She knows its unfair to use her Bambi eyes on Ava when she’s already trying so hard to convince Diana to leave. She knows Ava has never disagreed to anything when Beatrice has employed her wide eyed pout.

She knows and that’s why she does it.

"Fine. Fine, just for a little. Then you go back to sleep." Beatrice smiles when Ava presses into her back, pulling away with a giggle. "Ew, you’re wet."

"Sorry…" Ava chuckles and presses back into her, kisses her clammy cheek and winds her arm around her waist.

"Don’t apologize," Ava hums into the back of her neck, squeezing her tightly. “It’s not your fault.”

Beatrice curls her fingers around her thumb again, squeezing tightly as she begs her stomach to settle. Ava’s fingers ghost over the knuckles and she instinctively flattens her palm into the mattress.

“Sorry.” She’s thankful her face is already red from the fever so Ava can’t see the way they flush.

“What were you doing?” Her breath is cool on Beatrice’a neck, thumb brushing over Beatrice’s wrist as she turns her hand over and closes the fingers back around her thumb. She curls her fingers on top, offers a soft squeeze before releasing her. Diana hums and tries to mimic the action, her tongue peeking out of her mouth as she tries to figure out how to control her fingers.

“It’s stupid.” Beatrice flattens her palm into the mattress again and turns to press her face into the pillow.

“I didn’t say it was stupid and I don’t appreciate you implying that I thought it either. You aren’t a mind reader, Bea. So don’t try to be.” There’s only a little edge to her tone, just a little hint of annoyance that slips through the concern.

“I was holding it.” Beatrice’s eyes burn as she waits for the laugh she knows is coming.

“Your thumb?” There’s no malice in her voice but Beatrice is too scared to turn and check her face. Ava’s hand hovers over Beatrice’s again. “Would you rather hold my hand? If you would like, I mean. You can totally hold your thumb too, if you’d rather that but - ”

Beatrice threads her fingers over Ava’s, curls their hands together and squeezes them when she finally stops talking.

“Yeah. Like that. Cool, cool cool cool. Co - ”

“Ava, as much as I adore your ramblings, please shut up.” Beatrice giggles, soft and breathy and Diana laughs too.

“Sorry.” Ava buries her head in the back of Beatrice’s neck and prays she can’t feel her cheeks burning over her fever.

Find more here!

#in case you are wonderings #no they are still not together #at least they don’t think they’re together #they’re best friends #besties #definitely not a married couple #warrior nun #ava silva #avatrice #sister beatrice #warrior nun s2 #bea and ava #warrior nun season 2 #wn s2 #save warrior nun #warrior nun netflix #warrior nun rewatch #warrior nun fanfic #warrior nun season two #warrior nun s1 #renew warrior nun #fic: like the princess #babysitting au #babysitter au

[rambling-addict]

(It’s Friday the 13th... nothing special, really. Oh, and Ava Silva just happened to turn into a 4-year old.)

Beatrice: *calmly walks into the common room, a mildly panicked expression on her face*

Mary: Uh, you okay, Beatrice?

Beatrice: Yes... but we have a bit of a situation.

Camila: *frowns in concern* What is it, Bea?

Beatrice: Umm—*unable to say more as a little girl in oversized clothes runs to her, shouting ‘Bea!’*

(The three was about to ask who the girl was, but a certain glowing circle on her back was a dead giveaway.)

Lilith: What in the world?! Is that Silva?!

Ava: *turns at hearing her name and beams* Me! Ava Sthsilva!

Camila: *squeals* Aww, she still has a lisp! Cutie!

Ava: *beams even more, showing her perfect set of baby teeth*

Camila: *suddenly preoccupied with small Ava, leaving the two to deal with Beatrice*

Mary: What happened?!

Beatrice: *panicked* I have no idea! We were fine last night! We slept, then when I woke up, this little girl was poking my cheek!

Lilith: Wait, what do you mean ‘we slept’? *quite protective of her oldest friend* Beatrice, tell me you did not let this dumbass corrupt you!

Beatrice: *suddenly flustered, her face steadily turning red and her voice small* It’s not like that! We just... have a habit of sleeping next to each other. We hold hands... sometimes, we cuddle. It’s... comforting.

Mary: *smirks knowingly* Okay, Bea.

Lilith: That still doesn’t explain why Ava is literally a child now.

Camila: Maybe because it’s Friday the 13th?

Lilith: That’s ridiculous.

Camila: Is it, though? This girl has a glowing halo on her back.

Mary: Whatever it is, it’s probably temporary. Let’s cross the bridge when we get there.

Beatrice: So what do we do now? We have an intel mission today and—

Ava: Bea! *tugs at her hand* I’m hungwy!

Beatrice: Just wait a minute, Ava. Adults are talking.

Ava: Okay! *grins*

(Camila laughs at the adorable doe-eyed girl and even Lilith’s lips curled slightly in a smile.)

Mary: *chuckling* Well, Bea... she seems to know only you and she’s still as clingy as ever to you. So, you stay here to look after her and we’ll go.

Beatrice: But—

Lilith: We’ll be fine without your micromanaging, Bea. And we actually don’t need Ava’s sight for this. Besides, you’re probably the only one who this troublemaker will listen to.

Mary: *nods in agreement* Lil’s right. We’ll let Mother Superion know what’s up.

Beatrice: *sighs* Fine.

Camila: We’ll see you later. Bye, Bea. Bye, Ava!

Ava: *smiles back and waves as the three walked away* Byeee!

Beatrice: *looks down the girl holding her hand and smiles* How about some mac and cheese?

Ava: *toothy grin*

...

Ava: *lying down in the couch, her hands over her bloated tummy* Owie, Bea...

Beatrice: *smiles fondly* Next time, don’t eat too much and too fast.

Ava: But it’sth stho good!

Beatrice: *shakes her head* Here, drink some warm water...

Ava: *does as told*

...

Ava: *crawls on Beatrice’s lap* Comfy...

Beatrice: *slowly combs her hand through the girl’s hair, as she usually does to help older Ava sleep*

Ava: *smiles and hugs her tighter*

(After that nap, a few run-ins and incidents almost everywhere, and some late night bonding with the three women who returned successful from their mission... it was finally night time.)

Beatrice: *carries the tired girl from the bathroom to the bed*

Ava: I’m tiwed... *crawls to settle on top of Beatrice, her head finding home on her chest*

Beatrice: *chuckles* I can tell. So sleep now. Good night, Ava.

Ava: Mmm... I wuv you, Bea.

Beatrice: *heart swelling at the innocent affection and for once, she felt brave enough* I love you, too, Ava.

(She kisses the girl’s forehead, silently wishing that it was the older girl who was with her at this moment of her bravery.)

...

Beatrice: *wakes up to a familiar weight on her side*

Ava: Good morning.

Beatrice: Ava, you’re back!

Ava: Yup, no lisp anymore. *laughs*

Beatrice: So... do you remember anything at all?

Ava: Everything.

Beatrice: *blushes* Oh, so you heard—

Ava: *softly smiles* I meant what I said, Bea. Child or not, I felt your care for me. You’re my safety net... and I do love you.

(The same feeling overtook Beatrice and she took the plunge, irregardless of what consequences will follow.)

Beatrice: I love you, too.

I just love this gif of KTY. Lol.

Anyway, this is inspired by the show that haunted my thoughts for a few days. I’m forever heartbroken by Dani and Jamie’s story. “To truly love another person is to accept that the work of loving them is worth the pain of losing them.” Sometimes, we have to be brave enough to take the plunge.

Ugh! When is season 2 coming? I need it! I need a happy pill! Kristina! Update again, post something!

Other WN incorrect quotes/ dialogue fics: 17 | 18 | 19

#avatrice #ava silva #sister beatrice #ava x beatrice #beatrice x ava #warrior nun #sister camila #shotgun mary #sister lilith #incorrect warrior nun quotes #incorrectquote-style tiny fic #dialogue fic #by rambling-addict

[thanks--for--listening]

resurrection

ok i know i still have other fics to write but i got mad at those so here’s a little warrior nun fic instead. consider this my formal request for a better wig for lilith in season 2. (also on ao3.)

~~

Lilith had never cared much about her hair. For as long as she could remember, it held no importance to her or the people around her. When she joined the OCS, when she began to cover it, she’d felt no sense of loss, no internal conflict. She’d hardly paid it any attention — what did she care whether others could see it or not? Hair didn’t matter, appearances didn’t matter. Not as much as strength, intelligence, coordination. Not as much as duty. Not as much as a legacy.

Now she couldn’t stop staring at the mirror. Her reflection looked back at her, but all she saw was a stranger. She didn’t know this girl, with her grey hair and her coward’s eyes. She didn’t know this body, with a mind of its own and a history it refused to share. The person she used to see had died in that warehouse, and it’s replacement was second-rate. Undeserving of taking her place. Damaged beyond repair. 

“Hey, Cruella DeVil, you done admiring yourself yet? Or do the rest of us have to find another bathroom in this godforsaken place?” Mary’s voice broke her train of thought, and Lilith watched in the mirror as she walked up behind her. Something inside her twisted at the sight, at how every part of her appearance remained familiar. Despite everything that had happened, everything she’d lost, Mary hadn’t let it change her. She’d been strong enough to hold onto consistency.

“Don’t say that,” she heard Camila say, before seeing her head pop into the reflection behind her other shoulder. The hotel rooms they’d managed to hide in after the battle didn’t leave much room for privacy, it would seem. That, or her roommates simply didn’t comprehend the concept, or care enough to respect it. “I think it looks beautiful.”

“Oh, it’s definitely badass. There’s no doubt about that. I’m just saying, put on a fur coat, adjust the colors a little...”

“Her hair is prettier than that silly cartoon’s. And you know, I think grey is in right now.” She ran her fingers through it, and it took everything Lilith had not to flinch at the touch. “Lots of people would spend hours in a salon to try and get that color.”

“Yeah, you’re a real trendsetter now,” Mary laughed, and Lilith wanted to laugh with them, wanted to give a snarky response, wanted to do anything the old her would have, but she couldn’t. That woman was dead. And no miracle or Halo could ever bring her back.

She saw rather than felt Mary’s hand on her shoulder. “Hey,” she said, her voice soft and serious in an instant. “What’s wrong?”

Lilith didn’t know why she was asking until she shifted her gaze, saw the tears slowly making their way down her own cheeks. She couldn’t find it in herself to care enough to wipe them away. “I don’t know who that is,” she whispered.

“You don’t know who who is?” Camila asked hesitantly. “Do you...see someone?”

Lilith shook her head. Words had never been her preferred method of self expression, but she searched for an explanation nonetheless. “I look in the mirror and I see myself, but it’s not me. Not really.”

“It doesn’t matter what your hair looks like. You are the same Lilith you have always been.”

“You and I both know that’s not true, Mary,” she whispered. “Something happened to me. Something’s...wrong. And I don’t know what it is. How to fix it. Whether it can even be fixed.”

No one spoke for a moment. Between running away and desperately searching for a place to regroup, they hadn’t found the time to discuss her recent resurrection, or any of the complications that came with it. Part of her wondered if she’d even still be here if they had. There were only so many times she could apologize to Ava for trying to kill her, and if she couldn’t trust herself, how could she possibly expect the others to do the same?

“Maybe,” Camila said, “it’s not supposed to be fixed.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you were supposed to be dead, but you’re not. Nobody’s ever come back the way you have. That has to be a good thing.”

“What part of this could possibly be considered good?” She snapped. “I don’t remember what happened to me. I keep losing moments, losing control. And when I do, I hurt people.”

“That’s not what it looked like to me when we were fighting Adriel.”

“That’s because you weren’t at the tomb. I attacked Ava. Fought against us. I almost ruined everything.”

Mary’s eyebrows scrunched together. “Did you?” 

The memory of being restrained, held back, held together, echoed in her mind. “You know I did,” she said softly, shame creeping into her voice without her permission. “You were there.”

Mary shook her head. “No, I mean, we thought you were attacking us. But that’s because we thought Ava needed to get into the tomb. You were the only one who knew going in there was a bad idea. That it would put us all in danger.”

She tried to think back. She remembered fighting, but it was all blurry. Like she was watching herself from above. Like she wasn’t the one in control. The feeling hadn’t gone away until she’d felt Mary’s arms wrapped around her, her words an anchor bringing her back to the surface. 

“I don’t know,” she said. “I don’t know why I did it. I don’t know how I knew. It was as if someone else was using my body — I was just along for the ride.”

“Was it like a voice in your head?”

“No. It was more like...a feeling. Like I was acting on instinct. Only, I don’t know whose instincts.”

“Well,” Mary said, “I don’t know about you, but the next time you get that feeling, I say we let it play out.”

“Yeah,” Camila said. “Everything we thought we knew was wrong. Maybe wherever you went is trying to help us. Maybe it sent you back because it knew we’d need you.”

“Need me? You can’t even trust me. I can’t even trust me.”

“Hey,” Mary grabbed her shoulders, turned her until they were face to face. “There is nothing you could do to make me not trust you. You are the most honorable person I know— I’d follow you anywhere.”

“I tried to pull the Halo out of Ava. And that was before the Tarask.”

“A brief lapse in judgement doesn’t erase what I know to be true. And that is that you will always try and do the right thing, even if it kills you. So if something hitched a ride with you on the way back from wherever that Tarask took you, maybe we oughta give it a chance.”

“You could be the key,” Camila said, and she couldn’t see her but she could hear the smile in her voice. “You could be what saves us all.”

“I just—“ she turned, stared at her reflection, waited for something to change. “I don’t see it.”

Camila gasped. “I know what you need!” She exclaimed, before turning around and running out the door. 

Mary sighed. “I love that girl to death, but I’m one squeal away from sending her to Ava and Beatrice’s room.”

Her words almost dragged a smile onto her face, but the feeling didn’t last. “Mary,” she said quietly, “I know you want to believe that whatever happened to me is good.”

“We don’t know that it isn’t.”

Lilith just nodded. “If it isn’t, though, if...if I ever go too far, if I get too lost, I need you to promise me—“

“No, Lilith, I—“

“Promise me you’ll save them. Promise me you’ll stop me. No matter what it takes.”

Mary shook her head. “Find someone else to fulfil your death wish. I won’t do it.”

“I can’t ask anyone else. Camila’s too gentle to hurt a friend. Beatrice wouldn’t be able to live with herself afterwards. And Ava’s too important to have the others turn on her for doing what I told her. It has to be you, Mary.”

“What, and you think I’d be totally fine with killing you?”

“No, but--”

“How heartless do you think I am?”

The words hit her like a knife to the gut, the look she gave her twisting it until the pain was almost unbearable. Lilith forced herself to talk through it. “I’m not asking because I think you’re heartless. You’re the strongest person I know. I trust you more than I trust myself. I don’t want to ask you, but I also don’t want to hurt you. That’s why I need you to promise me you won’t let me.”

Mary hesitated. “There’s more to it than that, isn’t there?”

Lilith nodded, forced herself to keep eye contact, to pretend like she still had the courage she used to. “The others believe in divine intervention; you and I both know whatever happened to me is more likely the other way around.”

“We don’t know anything yet, Lilith.”

“Please, Mary,” she begged, and she knew the tears had come back but again she let them be. “If I hurt you, if I hurt any of them, I—“

“Hey,” Mary pulled her closer and she let her, rested her head on her shoulder. With anyone else she would have run, would have had to fight through the discomfort, but Mary had a way of making her feel safe in a way no one else did. “I trust you, 100 percent. And I promise I’ll make sure you don’t hurt anyone if you ever lose control. But I’m not killing you, Lilith.”

“Mary—“

“I won’t need to. I’ve always been the better fighter, anyway. Possessed or not, I’m coming out on top.”

She scoffed. Leave it to Mary to turn her heartfelt moment of vulnerability into a contest, although she had to work to fight back the smile that threatened to make an appearance in spite of the tears. “Maybe I should have asked Beatrice — at least she’d have a chance at beating me. If she got lucky.”

“Oh, it’s like that, huh? You take a trip to the other side and forget about the ass kicking I gave you on the pier?”

“One fight doesn’t outweigh years of victories.”

“Yeah, if that’s what you need to tell yourself to sleep at night, go ahead.” Mary laughed, and Lilith wondered what she’d done to get so lucky, to have someone like her stick around after everything she’d done. She wasn’t sure she could ever do enough to deserve her.

“Got it!” They turned to find Camila running back into the room, scissors raised above her head. 

“Oh, absolutely not.”

“It’s Girl Code 101, Mary! When something bad happens, you cut your hair.”

“That’s for getting rejected by your crush, not getting stabbed by a—“

“It’ll still work! Trust me, all the magazines say that when you need to make a fresh start, you have to change your appearance. And since the Tarask did the dye job for us…” she opened and closed the scissors a few times, and Lilith wondered if maybe she should be nervous.

“Yeah, no. I’m getting Beatrice.”

“Get Ava, too!” She called after Mary as she walked out the door. “She’ll agree with me!”

The door shut behind her. Lilith felt her absence like a weight, heavy and hard and impossible to ignore. She’d known Mary the longest, had grown to find every part of her familiar, but Camila was still a bit of an unknown. The only significant time they’d spent alone together had been at the lab; now, Camila crept up next to her, put the scissors down and reached for her hair with no hesitation. Lilith didn’t flinch, didn’t pull away, even when her mind begged her to run. Something kept her in place, something stronger than logic and habit. She couldn’t put a name to the feeling.

“I won’t do it if you don’t want me to,” Camila said as she collected all the stray strands of grey, “but I think maybe your problem is that you’re trying to look for the past in your reflection. You can try all you want, but the mirror can’t show you that. So maybe,” she folded her hair up so it looked like it hung just above her shoulders, “it’ll be easier to let go if you get to control what the present looks like instead.”

Lilith couldn’t look away. She knew it wasn’t real, not yet, but there was something about it that felt...better. She caught Camila’s eyes in the mirror. “How did you get so wise?”

Camila winked. “There’s a lot you don’t know about me.”

They looked at each other, and Lilith thought maybe she’d underestimated her, had seen a smile and a shiny surface and failed to look deeper. She decided she wouldn’t make that mistake a second time.

“Okay,” she sighed. “Do it.”

She closed her eyes, felt Camila drop her hair down her back. She thought about everything that led her here. The life she’d had, the future she’d envisioned for herself. It felt so far away, so irrelevant in comparison to everything that had happened since she’d given her life for Ava’s. The Lilith who’d dreamed about that future didn’t exist anymore, but maybe that was okay. Maybe the one that replaced her would be better suited for the war that was sure to come. Maybe this, whatever it was, was her destiny after all.

She heard the cuts, heard the footsteps and gasps of the others right after. She kept her eyes shut for another second, tried to savor how light she suddenly felt, as if Camila had rid her of more than a few inches of hair. When she finally looked, she saw someone brand new. Someone free.

“It’s beautiful,” Beatrice said, and she watched the way Camila beamed at them through the mirror. 

“I told you it would work!”

“What do you think, L?” Mary asked, and she didn’t look at the mirror, but stared straight at her. Lilith turned and stared right back, tried to communicate a million things she’d never have the words for. 

“It’s nice.”

“It’ll be nicer once I clean up the edges,” Camila told her, and as they all began talking over one another, each making the case for why they should be the one to finish the transformation, Lilith let her eyes drift back toward the mirror. She watched the way they bickered, their words completely void of malice, their spirits somehow lifted despite the horrors they’d all seen. They let themselves find happiness in the quiet moments — maybe she could, too. She stopped trying to fight the smile, and found that letting it be felt more natural than stoicism ever had. 

#warrior nun #i do be loving comments tho so if u wanna tell me what u think.....pls do #also im too indecisive about whether i ship anyone other than beatrice/ava or whether i just want them to be like sisters #which is why this is vague lol u could probably read a ship if u want idk #im just a sucker for some good found family #sister lilith #shotgun mary #sister camila #also new wig for lilith pls we need it #its so bad its just so so bad #but i love the idea of the grey hair #TFLAO3

[silencedlittlebirdy]

Conquering a World: Part 5

“And how would you describe yourself?” Traaiillooonn asked me. Curse him. I tried to think of exactly what I would say when describing myself. I hated that I had to go last. Everyone but Ava had been pretty honest. At least, it seemed that way. Only time would really tell how honest they were. “Introverted,” I said to start, then thought for a second. “Obsessive, distractable, tempermental, creative, sarcastic, violent…um…” I looked to the ceiling to try and think of more adjectives. “Fearful, a little rebellious, unfocused, awkward, blunt—sometimes past the point of acceptability, I can get loud and I cry when I get mad. I hate working on group projects, not because of the project but because I have to deal with people. I chose a degree in Forestry and another in Botany because I didn’t think a career in writing or music would pan out for me. I don’t like people messing with my stuff, or my life. I hate abrupt change. I abhor small talk, it’s just a way to avoid real conversations and real topics. You betray me, then I will never trust you again. Not completely. I’m a pretty good judge of character. I’m stubborn and no one can dissuade me from my beliefs. I believe what I believe. Which extends to believing that it might be fun to rebel against the Pqncallaxis Dominion, but…since they’re our only source of supplies…it wouldn’t exactly be wise to do so. Tempting, but not a practical use of our time. Just like this is taking away from not only my lunch, but also my work.” Someone chortled, but hid it. Traaiillooonn looked a little frozen. “Blunt, you said?” Chad looked like he was choking back laughter. “I would never have imagined from what you said,” Traaiillooonn said as he looked down at his recording device. Snarky little beast. “Huh, so sarcasm isn’t just a human trait.” I smirked at the table, then crinkled my nose as I looked at my cold lunch. I wasn’t hungry. Not anymore. But if the snake was still there… “If we’re done here, I need to confer with you, Fay. That animal that died in the pool, it apparently doesn’t chew it’s food much. I found a couple intact leaves. Maybe we can learn what’s edible from the wildlife.” Patricia stood up. I nodded. “Works for me. Though, I’m not sure if the serpentine thing that was in my workstation is still there or not.” Andrew pumped a fist and jumped out of his chair. “I’m so there!” Patricia smiled and shook her head. “Let’s go then. Traaiillooonn, you are finished with us?” He hesitated (yes, we were sure he was a he—we asked). “I do need to gather all of your descriptions of each other, but given the way you all work together I suppose it would be more appealing for all of you to talk about your peers when they aren’t around to listen. Ava advised me that humans generally are able to put up with people they don’t like to work towards a greater good.” Ava shrugged. Mike Findlay laughed. “Oh, I can’t even remember how many workers I had that I couldn’t stand personality wise, but who did excellent work.” Traaiillooonn was vibrating, with a sort of humming-purring deal. I folded my arms. “Looonn, this is your dream job, isn’t it? Studying us. Being around us. Learning our ways.” He caught one of his antennai and played with it like I would play with my hair. “Mayhaps, Fay. Mayhaps.” I smiled, “Well, at least one of us is happy. Meet at the lab?” I directed the question to Patricia. She nodded. Andrew hurried over to me. “Snake?” “Possibly,” I responded, leading the way out the door and over to my yard. My lab was basically a tent with a couple tables, and a chemistry set, and a kerosene burner. It was sparse for now, there were more supplies coming with that shipment that was ordered two weeks ago. Andrew went in the tent first. “Sweeet!” I peeked in, then shuddered a bit and backed out. “Don’t die.” “It totally doesn’t see me as a predator. This is so cool!” He sounded thrilled. He came out with the serpentine thing, holding it behind the head and by the body, being careful to keep its clawed front feet aware from himself. I pasted on a reluctant smile. He laughed. “I’ll release it into the…are we calling that forest?” I nodded. “That’s where I’ll release it then. How’s your compass working here? Is there a magnetic north?” “Yeah, seems to be. Well, it seems to keep a direction anyway. I’m still testing it, doing my best to map it all out. I’m not accurate, by far, but it’s better than nothing.” I felt my compass in my pocket, making sure it was still there. I had one other, not nearly as accurate as this one, but it pointed north. Mostly. “Well, I better release this guy. I’ll let you get to work.” “Thanks, Andy.” “No problem.” He walked off with the serpent thing. I went into my tent and cleaned up some of the disorder. One of the fruits had been knocked to the ground, and was the equivalent of bruised. I picked it up and set it on the table, then licked the remaining juice off of my finger. Delicious. Then my eyes widened. Idiot. Imbecile. Stupid. I grabbed my benedryl and the other stuff that I would have to take if it turned out to be poisonous, and sat in a chair. Patricia came in with some samples. “Hey, I would have thought you would be hard at work.” “I tasted the juice of a fruit, and now I’m waiting to see if it kills me,” I told her. Her eyes widened. “Why did you do that?” “A moment of stupidity.” “Did it at least taste okay?” “Fantastic, it would make a great dessert. You know, providing it’s not poisonous.” I started cutting the fruit open to study it. “Shall I spread these samples out on the empty table?” “Yeah, go ahead. I’ll be over in a second.” At least there was no tingling sensation on my tongue, that was a good sign. There were no signs of allergic reaction so far. “So, should I be concerned that you’re going to die?” “Possibly,” I replied. “I’ll go see Bea soon.” “What about now?” I shook my head. “I didn’t injest that much and there should be a biological response to any toxins before they kill me. Even then, what is there to lose?” “That’s a bleak outlook.” “Do you have a better one? We’re never getting home. I never even got to explore romantic relationships. I’ve been on two dates my entire life, and technically the one shouldn’t count.” I went over to examine her samples. She was quiet for a while. “Why didn’t you date more?” “Never met any guys, especially not ones that were interested in me. Too quiet for them. I was always too quiet. Or too loud. Too shy. Too fat. Not as pretty as my sister. Everybody loves my sister. Even my friends. Not that I’m bitter. I miss her. I miss my whole family. I’m talking crazy, I’m sorry.” “We’re stranded on some planet, far away from just about everything we know and love. I think you’re just a little more realistic than the rest of us. We’re all still hoping that we will go back to earth. Can’t really tell the kids otherwise. Not right now. Not with food so slim.” There was that too. I looked at the fruit. “I’m going to do something stupid.” “Please don’t,” She objected, but it was too late. I took a bite of the fruit. Dang it tasted good. She grabbed my wrist. “Spit it out, Fay. Now.” I swallowed. “Too late.” “Fay, this is nothing to mess with. Come on, we’re going to Beatrice and Dr. McNeal. Now.” She pulled me out of the tent and away. Everyone else was still chatting in the Findlay’s house. Even Andrew was back. They all freaked when Patricia told them what I had done. I let them berate me, and test me and push me onto a cot in the room dubbed the ‘medical ward’. I let them take blood samples and ask me a million questions about how I was feeling. They even made me sleep there overnight. Traaiillooonn was the first visitor in the morning. “Why would you eat something when you know not whether it will kill you?” “Why would they bring an uneven number of people? And why would they not pay attention to gender and age? Sure, they did the language check, but still. It’s foolish of them to think that we can do everything they need done.” “Can you not reproduce with any of the males?” “There are these things that humans live by, called morals, which say you don’t just reproduce with any male because some are married. Humans mate for life—or they intend to. But we will not just mate with any male that’s put in front of us. Not if we have any sense whatsoever.” “Humans are odd.” “Anything that is foreign to an individual can be perceived as odd or strange or disgusting. It’s all a matter of opinion and circumstance.” “You are what you call grumpy?” I sighed. “Yes. I’m sorry, Traaiillooonn.” “It is understandable.” I smiled. “But I think that the fruit I ate is safe to eat. It’s a start.” “And this excites you?” “We’re running out of food, yes this excites me. A little hubbub, but everything is fine and dandy and I’m ready to continue my tests.” I got my shoes on. “It’s early enough that I should be able to slip out before Patricia comes and forces me to stay for observation.” “And what makes you think I won’t stop you?” Chad asked from the doorway. I shrugged. “Someone has to make sure I survive the trip back to that fruit tree. I need to test it more.” “You’re insane,” He told me, but he was sort of laughing as he did. “Traaiillooonn, Chad is the specimen that you’ll want to talk to about reproduction. After all, he’s the eligible male.” Traaiillooonn’s antennae twitched and he made a sort of amused sound. Chad snorted. “And you’re not an eligible female?” I wrinkled my nose. “I’ll probably die. I’m likely to try something else after I get frustrated with how slowly the testing goes. Besides, I don’t really want to think about that right now. Because technically, you have three choices. Ava, me, or none of the above. You could wait for Juliet to be old enough, but I’m pretty sure your brother has dibs and if he doesn’t, Kevin does.” “I just wonder,” Traaiillooonn started, “why your gardens aren’t enough to sustain you all?” “We had a small garden and some cornstalks from the fields around our house. They were picked clean and while the green beans are still producing some and the cucumbers still have a couple that are growing, we won’t have anything more until the squashes ripen and we have to feed thirteen people. The Ledfords had a bigger one, but we only got one harvest from the one section before one of those weird giant creatures squashed all of the plants.” “And our garden was all herbs. The McNeals didn’t have a garden at all. We’re lucky we have what we have, but we need to supplement it soon. The chickens are helpful, but we’ll want to spend more time letting the flock grow rather than causing it to dwindle.” Chad handed me my backpack. I smiled at him, then stood and put it on. “Thus, we’re going to go find more native foods. Got your gun?” “Got my gun.” He gestured behind himself with his thumb. I nodded. “Then let’s go.” He gave a little mock bow and gestured for me to lead the way. “Milady.” I rolled my eyes and did a mock curtsy. I was on a mission now. I wasn’t going to let anyone stop me. Traaiillooonn calling after me stopped me. I glanced at Chad. “This might take a while. Can you get the wagon?” He nodded and headed that way. Traaiillooonn caught up to me. “Apologies. However, my research indicates that Ava is incompatible with Chad. And the Pqncall—” “Those that shall not be named,” I interrupted. “Yes. They are concerned with the rate of reproduction. If a step toward reproduction is not taken soon, they try to force it.” “Okay, here’s what you’re going to tell them. Not only do humans respond poorly to threats, they also ensure their own survival before they even consider something as serious as mating or the result of successful mating. Got it? There won’t be any reproducing going on until we have steady food supply, we know more about this planet and until it pleases us. Which means we also need the supplies we ordered. Got it?” Traaiillooonn clicked, and hurried off with his communication device. “What did he need?” “Not him. His bosses. I gave them a mouthful. Should take them a month to chew through. Hopefully it expedites the shipment. What is with the theme these past couple of days?” “What theme?” “Mating, romance, reproduction.” I shooed a chicken back into their pen. We couldn’t afford to lose any and the dogs were still inside with Ava. “Maybe fate is trying to tell you something.” “Then it needs to paint me a sign, because hints only make me grumpy.” “I noticed,” He chuckled. I gave him a little glare. “You were pretty…honest about yourself yesterday.” “I have to live with myself. I know me.” “You made yourself sound pretty…disagreeable. Why?” “I was just being honest.” “It’s not fully you, not in my experience.” “What, you don’t find me bluntly honest? Or creative? Or fearful?” “I don’t think I’ve seen you afraid, except maybe when we were getting chased by that thing and when you mentioned the serpent.” “Chad…” I shook my head. “I’m terrified. I used to be afraid of tornadoes. Now, I’m afraid that there’s going to be something here that’s worse than tornadoes. Worse than hurricanes. I’m afraid that I’m not going to be able to discern what’s safe for us to eat. I’m afraid of everything in there, because I don’t know it. I’m terrified, but I decided that first day that I wasn’t going to be stopped by my fears. And so far I’ve stuck to it, but I can’t sleep. I haven’t really eaten, and I’m afraid of what’s going to happen in the next couple of days.” “Me too,” He whispered, looking at the ground. “Do you realize how much everyone has been looking to you?” “Me? That’s not a good idea. At all.” “You’re not afraid to say things as they are. You notice…everything. You stay quiet and absorb all the information then in five minutes you summarize everything in blunt terms and bring us all to reality. That first day, after you left the group, after you touched that creature, the only thing anyone could say was that you were the bravest person in this group. It took us all a couple a of days to reach your level of bravery.” “I’m not brave.” “Yeah, you are. The definition of courage, of bravery, is to be afraid but not be hindered by that fear. You’re the bravest person on this planet.” I stared at him. “Why are telling me this?” “Because you need to hear it.” He shrugged. I stared for a while longer, then pivoted and headed for our entry point. “Right. Well. Fruit won’t pick and test itself.” I heard him sigh behind me. But I wasn’t about to look back. I was afraid of what I’d see.

@riptidethepen 

@thisnewjoe I’m not currently cross-posting this anywhere. I’m not even sure where I would cross post it. Suggestions welcome.

Thoughts and suggestions for the story?

#conquering worlds is just a hobby #humans are weird #outer space