#what else was he doing? lounging around the jedi temple and giggling to himself? subjecting vader to awful medical procedures for fun?

[chamerionwrites]

Now and then I have a little giggle when I recall that JJ Abrams made Rey Palpatine's grandkid via some sort of nonsensical cloning plot. It's not the worst thing in the ST but I do think it's emblematic of why it's bad. Signifier without substance. Derivative *and* gutless. Tried to rip off ESB without understanding how the Vader reveal works as a narrative beat, gave Sheev spawn, and didn't even have enough courage of their convictions to admit that he fucks.

Like we all know Vader spent two decades pining gloomily after Padmé. But Palpatine? Sheev Palpatine? The guy whose two modes are smiling smug self-satisfied secret smiles to himself and crowing POWER, UNLIMITED POWER? The guy who cackles with maniacal relish anytime he gets to let his hair down and have a lightsaber fight? That guy is a hedonist. Tell me I'm wrong. That man is at all times enjoying the hell out of being irredeemably evil. He is a literal emperor, the vastly powerful and mostly unchallenged ruler of the galaxy, reveling in a victory he spent many years plotting and scheming for. And they had to invent some half-assed narrative afterthought of a cloning program rather than simply allowing us to assume that at some point in the two+ decades between ROTS and ROTJ, that man got laid? The cowardice. The incompetence. The sheer commitment to taking every conceivable L

#sheev probably fucked somebody on the THRONE #what else was he doing? lounging around the jedi temple and giggling to himself? subjecting vader to awful medical procedures for fun? #he has people to rule the galaxy with an iron fist dude is fully living his best life watching operas and doing lil sith research projects #i'm sorry i just find this SO funny. literally what is the point of the cloning shit except the creators nervously wringing their hands #and assuring us that we don't have to contemplate the evil toad man/walking corpse in bed #COMMIT TO THE BIT COWARDS #obvs i'm being a bit facetious but i'm also not #star wars #palpatine #my posts #also #on writing