itshelenloewen

[itshelenloewen]

The Time is Now

We are always procrastinating. At least I am. So often I put things off to the absolute last minute. It can be the simplest of things too. It’s basically become a norm. Recent events helped me to see that even love can be put off for too long. My cousin committed suicide last week. He fought a losing battle of drugs and depression. He spent some time in a rehabilitation center but after his release, he went back to his old habits. I found out from his sister that he died believing no one cared for him. He felt so alone in this world. Yes, his family loved him. His parents spent the last few hours of his life talking with him gently and lovingly. But somehow, the love of his family was not enough for him. His sister posted a message on facebook asking everyone who cared for her brother to come to his funeral. More than 1,000 people showed up. But the sad thing is, we all showed up too late.

By putting off love, we can make people feel unworthy of love. Time and again we see how big of an impact love can make. If you know of someone struggling with drugs or depression, don’t delay. Go tell them how valued and loved they are. Make sure they know that in their darkest hour, someone is ready to be their light.  The time is now. We can make a difference by showing love right now. God taught us to love by sacrificing his only son. He loved us so much that he was willing to let his son take our place on that cross. As we come upon Easter, take some time to think of the meaning of true love. Then share it. We put off things for tomorrow that can easily be done today. Even just a message saying you’re thinking of someone can make all the difference. Don’t put this off for another minute. Share love now, because the time is now.

“It’s so easy to get lost chasing a life we thought we wanted. Convincing ourselves that power, fame or wealth will make us happy. That we lose sight of what is truly important. And all we need is that little push to reveal what has been missing. See, it’s the love of our family, our friends; and most importantly; the love of God that will bring us happiness. We just need to take that first step and reach for it. You see, it’s okay to follow a dream. As long as we don’t abandon those who truly love us. So you can spend your time pretending to be someone you’re not. But it’s wasted time because God is rooting for you. Life will test your faith. That’s the way it’s supposed to be. We’re only human and sometimes we make poor choices. But God will be there for us; no matter how far we stray. He wants you to come back to him.He wants you to come home.”

-Quote taken from the movie ‘Me Again’.

[itshelenloewen]

Coming Up Short

We are have evening services this week at church. He told a fictional story to bring out the point of the sermon on the night before last. It goes as follows:

There is a destination set before a group. It’s a 5,000 km gap and they must swim across. Now, the first one is a very poor swimmer. He only makes it out 10 meters before giving up. The next one makes it maybe 100 meters. Then there are a few stronger swimmers. One man makes it a full kilometer. The last one gets to 100 kilometers before he quits too. Each person gave it a go. Some did better than other but ultimately, they all quit. 

The moral to this story is that we can all only do so much on our own. We will fall short. There is no chance that we can earn our way into Heaven. We can’t make it there by doing good deeds or even just by living a good life. Only by the grace of God can we be saved. Jesus gave his life so we could be reconciled with God. He became the lifeboat. There is a way to cross this great divide. It’s salvation. Jesus made sure there would be a way to the other side. Our job is to accept him and the life he offers. It’s very simple. Some think too simple. But it’s like I said. We can’t earn our way in. We must simply be forgiven. On our own, we will always come up short. With Jesus Christ, we will make it home.

If you would like to make that decision to follow Christ today, read on. Acknowledge that the Father God, the Son Jesus and the Holy Spirit are one. Believe that Jesus Christ gave himself to be crucified for you. Admit that you are a sinner in need of redemption. Repent and ask for your sins to be forgiven. Tell God that you are willing to begin living for him, come what may.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!   ~2 Corinthians 5:17

Understand that this life is not an easy one. Persecution for your faith will come; especially in today’s world. But remember: God loves you and Heaven is rejoicing for your decision! Don’t give up. Reach for Jesus and he will take you across the ocean. Find a church and join in worshiping God. Join a Bible study. I have a friend who started one and learned as he went. It is very important that you share your experience. Don’t hide it as I did. Being a Christian is nothing to be ashamed of. You have made a choice to make Jesus the most important part of your life. I can guarantee that Satan will poke and prod and try to bring you down. Be baptized and tell the world what you know.

Jesus took you very seriously when he laid down his life for you. People say they will die for their causes all the time. Christians say they will die for Christ.

But will you live for Christ?

#Christianity #salvation #saved #NewCreation #JesusIsEnough

[itshelenloewen]

Love Can Break All Walls

It is one year today since my grandfather passed away. He was a very intimidating man. I met him when I was 12. He scared me to no end. But I greeted him as I always greeted family. I gave him a hug. That was where it began. After visiting very regularly, I began to admire this man. As a child, I was naive. He had an office that was unlike any other office I’d ever seen. It was filled with candy and chocolate. I admit, I was easily bribed. Grandpa gave me a sweetie every time I went to his home. I grew older though and candies became insignificant. But my grandpa always brought me one before I left anyway. Looking back, I see that it was important to him. It was his way of saying that I mattered to him. Of course, I had grown to love him. But I also discovered that friends were very much the center of my life. I would often choose to visit a friend instead of going to my grandparents. My mom and dad would return at the end of the night and tell me that my grandma and grandpa had asked why I hadn’t joined them. I felt guilty and went with them the next time. But eventually, my visits became less frequent. Family gatherings were awkward. I had no one my age to be with and I was too young to sit in with the grown ups. This made me want to go visit even less. I was able to convince my parents to let me hang with my friends from there on out. Months would go by that I didn’t see my grandparents. Yet I still got presents from them like clockwork. Then I went to Canada for a time. Once I came back to Mexico, I went to see grandma and grandpa. The first thing I did was give them both a big hug. Grandma always met everyone outside to welcome them in. I was no different. She accepted hugs willingly. I remember walking inside and seeing grandpa fiddling with the knobs on his radio. He turned to me so I could give him a proper greeting. I had noticed something in this hug. He was no longer so stiff and he actually squeezed back. I didn’t think too much into it at the time but I see it so clearly now. He’d changed. I did recall one detail in that moment. He was my grandpa and he loved me. I had had my doubts over the years because I wasn’t a blood relation. I was, in fact, only his step granddaughter. It was during my identity crisis years that I wasn’t sure if my dad’s family accepted or even loved me. My grandma was the only one with whom these thoughts never arose. I’m sorry to say they did with the rest. After my grandpa got sick and was admitted to the hospital, I visited him. He looked so small and fragile laying on that bed. But I did as I always had. I hugged him. He gave it the best effort he could and raised a weak arm. He wasn’t able to squeeze me tight but I felt his love just as powerfully. I told him I loved him and he gave me a smile. My grandpa wasn’t one to show affection often, but we all knew his love that day. He died soon after. It was New Year’s Eve that he was rushed to the hospital and he died on January 27th. I found out just last week that he’d been scared of me because I hugged him. He was raised to be tough. Hugging and sharing affection was just not normal to him. Now, with a step-granddaughter who continually greeted him in that manner, he had to change. It had taken him a long time to get used to it but he did. My sister told me that he’d grown to love seeing me and getting my hugs. It had turned a hard man to a loving grandpa. When I heard this, I cried. I regret the many times I opted to stay home when I could have put a smile in heart. Don’t underestimate what a simple act of kindness or love can do. Express yourself to those you love. Believe me; it’s worth it.

Listen to the song “A Father’s Love (The Only Way He Knew How) by High Valley. That is the exact description of my grandpa.

RIP Grandpa. I love you.

[itshelenloewen]

A Year of Change - 2015 Recap

2015 was a year of change. I had just settled into a steady routine again when everything flipped on me. The group of friends I hung out with was the first thing to go. I lost a few friendships that broke my heart. I began feeling lost in my personal life. So I threw myself into my work. I was very good at my job and I enjoyed it. At least for a while, I knew what was expected of me. I knew I could deliver. But over time, I began to long for relationships again. It seemed like the harder I tried, the less time I had to cultivate friendships. Two of my co-workers quit and I was responsible to cover the entire workload. It was difficult but I managed. I thought it would be temporary. While I waited for a new hire, I abandoned my social life completely. There was never time. I worked long hours, Monday to Saturday. Eventually, I began to feel burned out. It didn’t take long before I crashed. I sought work in a slower paced environment where I could get back to enjoying life. My sister took me out to meet a new group of people and I had fun for the first time in months.  The adjustments took some time to sink in but I started to love living again. The year was passing so quickly. Then my sister and I decided to get a place of our own. A week before Christmas, we were officially living by ourselves. It has been a wonderful change. At times, it’s a bit of a struggle, but I wouldn’t change it. Through all the ups and downs, I know God was with me. He led me along this path to help me grow. Heaven knows I needed some restructuring in my life. I look forward to the life God has planned for me in 2016.

[itshelenloewen]

New Year’s Eve

It’s almost New Year’s. Many of us will be making resolutions. “I’m going to get fit, I’ll eat better, I’ll follow through with the things I’ve started,” etc. Most of the time, we come up short. I believe it’s because we feel we need to make goals; whether we want to complete them or not. For this year, I have resolved to make no year long goals. I am making single focus goals. I pick something that I want to do and work at it until I complete it. Once I finish with that, I move on to the next project. Of course, I may need to do more than one thing at a time. But the purpose in this is to actually accomplish a few things. If I’m so focused on the end result and trying to balance it all, I am more likely to fail. For if I fail at one, I am discouraged and give up easier on the rest. I know many people who are like that. So instead of doing it all, I’ll take the necessary time and just do it well. Eventually I’ll get to it all. We all know the moral of the story of ‘The Tortoise and the Hare’ is ‘slow and steady wins the race’. That’s my plan for the new year. But even so, I am going in with strong determination. 

One thing I plan on doing is re-prioritizing my spiritual life. I know I lagged in a lot of things this past year. I intend to make up for it by following through. I plan on stopping the busyness of life and truly taking time for God and what he has in store for me. I know God has a plan for my life. He wants the best for me and it’s time I focus more on him. There have been so many times this year that I’ve seen his handiwork. If I don’t stop and pay attention, I will continue to miss out on so many blessings. I know that this is a lifelong journey but my resolution here is to just take it day by day. Every day is a chances to try again. And if I should come up short; here or anywhere else; I won’t throw in the towel. Dust off and go again. That’s all any of us can really do.

This year, resolve to be serious, consistent, loyal and dedicated. Don’t give up. And if you hit a bump along the way, give it another try. We’re only human, after all.

#NewYearsResolutions #newyear #2016 #consistency

[itshelenloewen]

Christmas Holidays

This past week was Christmas. As a Mennonite in Mexico, there are traditions that are consistently upheld. For starters, a three day holiday. Each day is spent at family gatherings; meeting for lunch at the grandparents with ALL the cosigns, aunts and uncles. The entire day is spent eating and conversing. But the older teens and young adults feel out of place. They are neither married nor fit in with the younger kids. So it is a great time for friends to get together. And that we did. Christmas day, I went to church and was part of a choral program. We sang beautiful songs and I had the honor of doing the Christmas Story reading. I got a wonderful blessing from the sermon and the rest of the program. For lunch, we gathered at my aunt and uncle’s place. This is on my mother’s side. Since I don’t have grandparents on that side, it alternates yearly between my parents’ home to my my aunt and uncle. Afterward, my sister and I went to our friend Rosy’s house. A cold front came in that day. But it was on Saturday that the snow came down. It isn’t all that often that we get snow around here.  Normally we only see a light fall in January. It was also on Saturday that my immediate family got together. It was small and the food was delicious. Mid afternoon, my sister and I went back to Rosy’s. We got there just as the snowball fight began. It was quite the sight! Picture a dozen young adults playing with the snow. Because it is such a rarity, everyone was excited. Mind you, there were plenty who complained about the cold. Once the initial wonder wore off, were were a group of nearly fifty huddled around the indoor fire; desperately trying to get warm. It’s only in the days of winter that table games are valued the most. Friends and family are cherished. God surprises us with the wonder of snow. We remember the true meaning of Christmas. We celebrate Christ’s birth together. We focus on love. Spending quality time with those I love brings me the most joy. It has nothing to do with the presents. It’s the time shared loving one another and loving Jesus for what he was willing to give up for me.

#snowday #Christmas #love #familyandfriends

[itshelenloewen]

Finding A Friend

Painful memories burdening my soul

I’m asking you to carry me out of this hole

Crying for a friend to pull me through

I know it’s a lot to ask, but I need you

Hold my hand, wipe my tears

Chase away all my fears

If I fall, pick me up again

Link our hands like in a chain

Together we will sing a song

Hoping everyone will belong

To this wonderful group of friends

Where no one lies or even pretends

Maybe we think there is no such place

A place filled with love and grace

Where we will find such a wonderful friend

When our lives come to an end

In this land which seems so far

Is that one twinkling star

If you look all around,

That far off land will soon be found

The friend you search for is a king

Not the kind with a cloak and ring

He puts any other king to shame

Starting with his glorious name

I wrote a lot of poems growing up; most of them in school. I found that I enjoyed poetry. This was the first poem I wrote after moving to Mexico. I wanted to be famous. So I decided to write a song. This is what I came up with. Mind you, I was trying to be the next Hilary Duff. To this day, I still don’t know how I ended up with something spiritual when I didn’t know much about Christianity. It was another year before I accepted Christ. I grew up in Church but it was never really explained to me. But God calls each of us to him through what we do know. For me, it was writing. I had a desire to be heard and writing had the answer. It wasn’t until I wrote this poem that I began to understand that there was more for me than just writing empty poems and stories. I was so nervous when I took it to my mom and read it to her. She went to find my dad and I had to read it again. It was then that I knew I wanted to be a writer. It took another few years before I selected Christian fiction as my genre. If ever you feel like you don’t know where to go or what to do, remember that God has a plan for you. He’ll take you as you are and where you are coming from. He has a plan for you. One of my favorite verses is Jeremiah 29:11. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

#plans #Jer29:11 #poetry #Godismyfriend

[itshelenloewen]

Game Day

It was cold yesterday so we spent the day indoors. I arrived at Rosy’s a little later than most and walked in on a game of Connect 4. Laughter rang through the room. It was a beautiful sound. And instantly addictive. Many rounds passed before I took a turn. It can be a very competitive game. I played many rounds with my friends and won more often than not. (Not bragging.) After a while, we went upstairs and played many games of pool. We played a game where everyone picks a number from the pool balls and then took turns pocketing them. If your number went into one of the pockets, then you were out. It’s a great game to play with big groups. Since it’s a game of chance and honesty, I only won once. We also played the traditional game. Upstairs is also a punching bag, yoga mats and boxing gloves. Some of the guys decided to make us of these items. The mats served as the ring and they boxed. Only a few hits seemed to do a bit of damage. The boys took turns proving who was the toughest. Thankfully, no blood was spilled. Only sore ribs and a few limps were the end result. But the entertainment was sufficient. Everyone was watching. Obviously, not everyone is into boxing so a few of us went back downstairs after a bit. In walks a friend. He joins us at the table for a game of Connect 4. Since I was dominating until this point, he challenged me. We played a good ten rounds of which I lost nine. It was definitely a fun game. I was glad to learn a new technique from him. I played against my sister after that using his advice and won. But so did she, since she caught on right away.

I learned a lot from a cold day in Mexico. Top three:

   3. Good, old fashioned games are still popular.

   2. Friends will rise to any challenge and still laugh after they lose.

   1. Losing is fun.

Cell phones can never replace human contact. The best thing is that they didn’t. Almost nobody focused on their phones. We were a little too busy bringing back fun. Remember how to play. Find your inner child. Just because we’re adults doesn’t mean we can't have a ‘snow day’. Game days are the perfect way to spend a day inside. This wasn’t our first one and most certainly will not be the last.

#gameday #friends #connect4 #billiards #fun #losingisokay #friendlycompetition #happy

[itshelenloewen]

Girls are...(insert adjective here)

When eleven girls go on a weekend road trip together, things get pretty intense. We described it as a simple Christmas shopping trip to El Paso. I’ve learned that girls packed into a van together is a recipe for…well, anything. Crazy, funny, horrifying, thoughtful, loving, etc. Girls are UNIQUE. My friends especially.

We met up at Rosy’s place at 5:00 a.m. Already the energy was high. Utje drove the van most of the way to El Paso. We sang our hearts out and had enough fun to last the rest of the weekend. Nancy and Eva brought on improv comedy. They did a few impressions that had us all laughing and rolling our eyes.

I took over the driving and drove to the border. Now, mind you, we were eleven girls in a van. Utje and I were all tense since it’s the border. We didn’t want any problems. Not that there was cause for worry. We had nothing to hide. But there’s a certain feeling you get when you pull up to the booth at the border. It demands a little respect. I was always taught to be quiet. But not Nanc. She went into her annoying voice and kept talking. I was on pins. Thankfully, the border patrol officer thought it was funny. He made small talk with us and asked where all the guys were. We told him that the guys couldn’t handle us so we left them at home. From there on out, it was shop ‘til you drop. For the next two days, we did a lot of shopping. A few grand went out in the blink of an eye. Each night we’d return to the hotel completely exhausted. It was worth the fun at every turn. We only lost Shanti twice. But the best part was our last dinner in El Paso. We ate at Texas Road House.

Our waiter was Dante. He was sweet and doting. Obviously we fawned over him. He  was quite the gentleman. We spent two hours at the restaurant and drooled over food and boys. Then the girls embarrassed Susy P. and myself. The two of us had had birthdays very recently. The others asked Dante for a birthday surprise. So he brings out the saddle and we had to sit on it together while the entire restaurant was called upon for the traditional YE-HAW! I was very red. We were one of the last tables to leave for the night. But not before we got a picture with Dante and one of his co-workers.

It really was one of the most entertaining and wonderful trips of my life. I say everyone should gather a van full of their best friends and hit the road together. The memories are some of the best you’ll ever make. I love my friends and wouldn’t trade them for the world. They are a part of who I am and I’m all the better for it. I love you ladies! <3

#besties #bffs #shopping #girlstrip #girlsonly #shoptilyoudrop #besttripever #noboysallowed #christmasshopping #elpaso

[itshelenloewen]

PumpkinFest 2015 - Full Update

It’s been a rather busy month for me. My baby sister got married. She was a beautiful bride and I couldn’t have wished a better man for her. But what I would like to talk about today is this past weekend. It was a weekend of wonder.

My family hosted our third annual PumpkinFest Fundraiser. All proceeds go to helping the local orphanage Gotitas De Miel (Drops of Honey) and Friedensplatz (Place of Peace). Both organizations are devoted to helping children. Gotitas De Miel is a standard orphanage; caring for orphaned and abandoned children. Friedensplatz is a refuge for children as well as a temporary home while their parents go though a rehabilitation program. Both places are dependent upon donations to keep their doors open. That is why my family and a board of directors host a fundraiser every year.

The turnout was incredible. We had live music, great food, a small auction and lots of pumpkins. The competition was really close. Our largest pumpkin weighed in at 298 kg (655.6 lbs). There was also the unveiling of an 8 foot pumpkin pie. Even with all the people in attendance, we were unable to eat it all. The remainder which went unsold in single servings, was sold off in large pieces at the end of the night. Children from Friedensplatz made little wagons which were also sold in the auction. For the past few weeks, raffle tickets had been sold to promote the event and get more people involved. A few young kids got the honors of pulling names from the draw tank to reveal winners. All in all, the event was successful. But at the end of it all, there was a moment that brought me to tears. As we began to clean up the gym, many joined the effort. It was a unity that spoke volumes. Most of them volunteered to help clean up. It took only a fraction of the time that it would have taken otherwise. An event in support of our community brings out the best in people. That is what I have noticed. No matter how small, find a way to support organizations that benefit your community. Believe me, it’s worth it.

A big thank you to all those who helped!

#pumpkinfest #fundrasing #live music #rallysupportforkids #pumpkin pie #giantpumpkins #pumpkin #auction #winnerscircle #trophies #teamwork #unity #food #friends #family #fun #community #goodcause

[itshelenloewen]

Lessons Learned

It’s been a really long time since I wrote anything; both here and with my next novel. A lot has happened over the past few years and I’ve learned a few lessons the hard way because of it. A lot of what I went through had to do with my self-worth. It took me a whole year to understand a couple of things about who I am. I’m praying that this helps you see yourself in a better light too.

1. Perfection is overrated...

Who of us does not make mistakes? Name yourself if you exists! It's as I thought. We ALL mess up. So why strive to perfection? I prefer the saying "Be the best you possible." Understand that you won't be perfect, no matter how hard you try. Just be you and be the best version of you that you can be. Living is worth it. Truly living. When you constantly strive for perfection, you miss the awesome day to day. I mean there will be tough times. Some days you won't be able to stop crying or pull yourself out of bed. But everything is fleeting and temporary. It'll blow past. You'll survive. You will pick yourself up, take a deep breath and live again. These are the moments called life. They won't be planned and sure won't gain perfection status. But they will make you stronger. Dream and dare and believe! So long as you do your best and give it your all, you're doing all that needs to be done. It is then that you can say that you are really living. You have to feel life in order to live. Both the good and the bad shape us. It's our response that counts though. You can only live once you aim for the amazing and drop the perfect. Perfection is overrated. Know it. Believe it. Leave it at the best.

2. Identity...

Do you have a nickname? Some past idiotic move that landed you with a label that somehow stuck? Well, that's not you. You are not what you do. You are not  the things people say about you or your past mistakes. What you wear and how you talk don't define you. Feel free to be you. Be comfortable with you are. I am a bigger woman. I am overweight and that is a big issue for me. I was unable to lose weight by dieting and exercise alone. I finally saw a doctor who was able to help me. I've lost 50 pounds over the past year. I am still about 50 pounds too heavy but I feel better for the accomplishment. A lot of my friends are size 2 type girls. They  are beautiful. I envy them. I shouldn't but I do. I am beautiful too. I strongly believe that. I can work with myself to change my weight. But I will not change the way I dress or my hairstyle for anyone. By that, I mean I won't conform. The Bible tells us not to conform to the ways of this world but rather to be transformed. Whoever you are, wherever you may be: YOU ARE SPECIAL! You have an identity in Christ. If you believe in God or not, believe that you matter. You are loved and you are special. It took me a long time to lose the sweaters and simply be me. I had self loathing issues for a long time. I was jealous of my sisters. They had relationships and were comfortable with who they were. They are all talented and confident. My step sister has the voice of an angel. After a long time, I saw the difference. I write. I thought I was bland. Turns out I am not. The way I started to gain confidence and really like me (flaws and all) was to tell myself that I was pretty every single day. I'd look in the mirror and repeat it often. I literally saw the difference happen. But it was more than that. I came to understand that God saw me as special too. This is how I know you are special. Give it a try. You won't regret it.

3. Live. It's Worth It...

Everything is worth it. Love with all you've got. Dare to dance in the rain. Get out of your comfort zone. Try something new. Give it all you've got because it's a chance to see love in action. Don't fear the unseen. Living a full life is so worth it. I'm just getting started. You should too. Expect pain and hurt but don't give up. Fall back on God if you're unsure but live!

In short:

Don't expect to be perfect. Just be your best.

Find an identity in Christ. Find your self-worth. Because you are worth it.

Finally, live. Get out of your bubble and experience the best of life. Be the best of this life.

I hope this has been a been a help to someone. It's not perfectly written, but who cares? These are a few things I've learned along the way. I choose to live. I don't need to be perfect. I just need to be someone God can use to help others. 

Dare to be.

-H

[itshelenloewen]

Never Beyond Repair

I'd like to start with a question.

Why do we let our mistakes define us?

I messed up again today. I ignored the fact that I had the strength to resist temptation and value in life. Many times I sit alone a little too much and think about how alone I am. I make up the excuse that I'm new in town and have no friends here yet. So I indulge in sweet goodies and ignore the needy people outside my door. I come up with more excuses then to justify my actions. So just now I got out of my recliner and gave a thought to my life. Many questions popped up. A few are:

1.) How can God use me to bless others if I hide from Him all day?

The answer is: He can't. I don't give Him the opportunity to use me. Yes, we all need some "me time" but let's not let it get out of hand. I am an extrovert when I'm at work or with people. But try getting me to leave the house first! I would seem like I hate being around people! That is truly not the case. I do appreciate some quiet alone time. But lately I have been having too much of it. I am constantly avoiding going out other than for work. I didn't realize this so much until my mother demanded I get up and out. And to top it off, she's 3500 kilometers away! That's pretty sad; I know.

2.) How can I love myself if all I do is hide away and sulk?

If I hide from life, I'll just miss it. The world won't wait for me to be ready to join it. It keeps moving. I have no excuse that holds any merit as to why I stay cooped up. I just suddenly decided that I wanted to ignore the world. Earlier today I watched the season two finale of Touched By An Angel. It was a story that really got me thinking about getting on the move again. I don't want to end up angry and hating myself for letting life pass me by. That is why I'm writing this. I won't watch a church service on TV tomorrow. I'll attend one in person. I will find a constructive way to fulfill my time off. I will let God use me for His glory. It's that simple. I will.

After I realized how many promises I'd broken-to myself and to others-I started to think how far from God I'd fallen. My lifestyle, my excuses for the way I am began to weigh heavily on my mind. I realized that this was the moment that I needed to come to. Either I am going to have to change some things or I'd end up worse off then before. I analyzed my life. I can't love or be loved by hiding. I can't experience God's love if I leave Him on a shelf. I almost thought that my life might be beyond repair. There was just too much wrong with me. Then I turned on the radio and heard some beautiful words.

YOU ARE NEVER BEYOND REPAIR.

How wonderful to know that I can fall short of my promises and commitments and that God will still forgive me. It's not that I or anyone plans to mess up. Sometimes we just do. I am certain that we all reach a point in life where we don't have any place left to go but up. Once that decision has been made, God can work in us. We are all His children. He loves us all very much. Don't let your mistakes define you. Mine were leading me to live in the past; to dwell. I was feeling quite hopeless. But God used a song to speak to me. We can all be repaired. No one is beyond repair. Just remember that.

The song is Never Beyond Repair by Everfound.

#Everfound #Never Beyond Repair #Free #Worth it #mistake #God forgives us #repent

[itshelenloewen]

Strength (to conform or stand firm?)

What does it mean to be strong? The definition is "exerting great force" or "able to withstand great force or pressure". I am partial to the second one. There is something deeply moving about being able to withstand great forces and pressures. Think of it like this. Peer pressure is definitely a strong force. While we live in a world that pressures us to conform, we have a stronger source to help us through. God does not apply weights to us. He relieves us of our burdens. There are so many times in our lives that failure creeps in and threatens to destroy everything. That is where strength comes in. We must learn to say no to things that will harm us; both physically and spiritually. Strength is being able to go against pressure, to stand up to the bully, to tell people who God really is and not fear their opinions. Strength is being true to yourself and living the life God calls us to. Strength is not being afraid to pray in public restaurants. Don't be conformed. There is a quote that I really like by Ralph Waldo Emerson. It say: "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment". So be strong. Don't let others tell you how you should live. You set the stage. Show them who leads you by the way you live. God is always there. He's never changing. Temptation is another force exerted upon us. We are all sinners. We all have weaknesses. For some it is stealing, drinking, or drugs; while for others it is sex or porn. How does strength fit in here? Say no to temptation. I know it sounds simple but is in fact the exact opposite. I myself struggle to avoid temptations. No one is perfect. We all fall short. But God helps us. To fight temptation, we need a stronger hand. Out of ourselves we will fail again and again. If we rely on God's strength, we can stand more firmly. I'm not saying that we'll be perfect then. We just have a better chance at being strong. Conformity will always be there, hidden in the shadows. Making us believe that we must change. But God loves us as we are. He will accept us as we come. He won't ask us to become something else. We might have to sacrifice a few things but if we can be strong and lead a Godly life, isn't it worth it? I hope this helps someone. I know it helps me see things differently. Praying that God helps you to be strong today. Always His...Helen

#Strength #God #Conformity

[itshelenloewen]

This is the 15 second book trailer for my first novel "Without A Trace". It was created by Tate Publishing Inc. in Mustang, Oklahoma. Enjoy!

A quick bio:

Tony and Kiana walked for numerous blocks in silence. The stony silence practically screamed at them. Suddenly a blinding light flooded their vision from the front. They hadn't seen or heard a car approach. The rain had drowned out all noise. It must have been parked. Three bulky men climbed from the snazzy sports car. Tony sized up the situation in a flash. A streak of lightning followed by a clap of thunder rolled. These men had been waiting for them. The thought terrified Tony for a fleeting moment. Until now, he thought Nicky might have just run away. Now he wasn't so sure.

These men were coming straight for them.

After her parents' deaths, Kia feels like nothing in her life is right. She finds herself lashing out at her brothers who try to help her and rejecting the faith that should have held her together. Her self-destructive path is sharply interrupted when one night, while out for a walk, she and her brother are attacked. As the attackers beat her brother, she is shoved into the back of a mysterious car. Kia's family searches desperately for her, even as she struggles to figure out exactly what her kidnapper's motives really are and why one of them seems almost familiar...

Kia may have disappeared Without a Trace, but she isn't lost to God. Will she find the strength to turn to him in what she fears may be her final moments?

#Kidnap #Mystery #Murder #Love #Forgiveness #Faith #Suspense

[itshelenloewen]

Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it. C. S. Lewis

[itshelenloewen]

This was taken in Taber, Alberta, Canada. It has been used as my first author photo for my novel "Without A Trace."