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#✾ anon
throwaway-yandere · 2 years
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"I AM HERE" (Yandere Modern CEO! Alhaitham/Reader)
a/n: btw, the logo's made by Esther anon!!! ❤️ Thank you so much!!!! Ily!!!
Unreliable Synopsis: You got recruited as Alhaitham's assistant... But honestly? You'd rather be a damn idol producer.
Mother of Klee, Alice's note: We (Our cutie pie Lumine and I) just wanted you to know that it wasn't our idea to make you Alhaitham's assistant, ✾... That's all! I'll have Barbara pray for you every Sunday <3
Yandere Idol!1k event masterlist
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You didn't get the job.
Technically you did get to work for the company, but you still didn't get the job. It's a strange predicament, truly. It would be comparable to learning how to prepare fried eggs in a culinary class and then being informed that you must serve medium-rare steak with sauce for the test.
Yes. You didn't become an idol's producer.
But anyone can imagine the kind of stress you're under when you found out you were hired as the CEO's assistant.
-----
"Ohohoho, a lost guest! It's always nice to see a new face around here! Can I get you something to drink? I promise you can trust me!" A man approached you with two bottles of iced coffee.
You raised an eyebrow, clumsily scratching your neck. 
The taller blonde man beside him sighed exasperatedly. "I don't think anyone in their right mind would accept drinks coming from..."
An idol wearing a weird bonnet? Yeah.
"Geez, trainee, what's with that look? I don't spike drinks. Is that sooo hard to believe?"
"You're Kaveh and you're Venti of 5wirl, aren't you?" It's clear to you who they were after that brief exchange.
"Yep yep!!!" He does a tiny little finger-gun gesture. "The one and only– wait a minute, that's Itto's line."
"S-Sorry to bother you, but I'm quite lost right now..." You stuttered. "If you could lead me to CEO Alhaitham's office, that would be fantastic."
"Aaaahh, so YOU'RE (Y/n)! We heard rumors that you're going to work as that idiot Alhaitham's assistant, is that true?"
Your nose scrunched. Sadly, that does seem to be the case based on TeyvatPro's employees' behavior towards you.
Venti gave you a look of pity, "maybe you'd have a good life if he wasn't the CEO and a cum laude Akademiyan graduate. Unfortunately for you, that guy is both."
But you're also an Akademiyan graduate...
"That bastard's an absolute numbers guy for a linguistics major, if I were you, I'd purposefully bomb that interview," Kaveh said.
Venti shrugged. "Do you even have to try? I'd crumble if I'm stuck with him in a room for more than an hour. He probably got that attitude from his seniors."
But based on the magazine you've read, you were a senior when Alhaitham was a freshman...
"Yeah, yeah, we get it. Enough slander, Venti." Kaveh scoffed. "Like, hello? I was Alhaitham's senior you prick!"
You perked up. "Oh? What did you major in?"
Kaveh gazes at you proudly. "Architecture."
You raised a hand and you shared a quick high-five. "Nice! I love to idle around St. Deshret's building back then--"
"Aaaaaaaalright nerds, we're here!!!"
Venti loudly announced, bowing in front of the door.
A closed door, huh? There are unspoken things about doors when it comes to superiors. It's a pseudo-science that when a superior's door is always open, they value employer-employee relationships and are willing to hear out inquiries. Considering how Sir Alhaitham's closed...
Well... You shouldn't make a mountain out of a molehill.
A pink-haired lady opened the door.
"There you are, little one. Come, wait inside."
---
"We didn't expect someone like you to apply here. Your GPA is astoundingly high– what exactly made you want to apply here?"
The money and the location, but mostly the former. You had a similar salary before your old company faced bankruptcy, but the workplace here has some pretty decent coffee and a nice dental plan. Those standards may be low but at least they weren't nonexistent like your newbie self's preservation skills. 
Miss Miko smiled slyly.
"You know what, don't answer." She said. "The boss should emerge in 3... 2... 1..." 
You heard the door open, but you can't see who it was yet since a bookshelf was blocking your view. 
"Well then, I'll be taking my leave~." The ex-idol giggled. "Farewell, little one."
Of course, it was none other than the CEO himself. Alhaitham walked to his desk, ignoring Miss Miko as he sat down, which amplified your nervousness. He's known as a genius businessman for a good reason. With a demeanor imbued with confidence and wit, his face glows in a rather youthful light. 
"I'm certain you've deduced why I called you here."
You're wary of how his cologne smelled like money. He smells like he's trying to prove something to you. 
"Y-Yes, sir, but I don't think I'd be fit to be your assistant–"
"That's right. You're still incompetent." He deadpanned, "I'm only hiring you because you have neat handwriting, and based on Lumine's analysis, you're something of a realist. My criteria are usually stricter than that."
You know little regarding the full business Alhaitham conducts, but if his standards helped him stay as the CEO instead of Madam Alice, it must be a challenging one.
"But...?" You droned.
"But?"
"W-Why me, then?"
Alhaitham scoffed, "there's no use explaining more than half of my reasonings to you. Let's just say I enjoy how you're something of an odd one out. Uniqueness as an asset is something I value, especially in this industry."
"If I'm not worthy, then may I propose that I'll only be a temporary assistant until you find a suitable idol for me? O-only if you'd allow it, of course."
He raised an eyebrow, not expecting those words from you.
"You're seriously determined to be an idol's producer?"
"I am."
"Even when being MY assistant provides better benefits?"
"Yes, sir."
"How stupidly honest. No, scratch that off the record: you're stupid AND honest." 
You laughed uncomfortably. You're not sure why you're so direct with the CEO. Being straightforward with your potential employer is quite a welcome change from your usual practice of masking your true thoughts with formalities. You usually keep your opinions to yourself, but his mere presence implores you to speak frankly.
"I know that look." He said. "You notice it too, right? We communicate rather naturally for an employer-employee relationship."
"Yes, sir. It's a bit strange."
"Hmm. If you look deep within your past, you wouldn't think it's strange at all."
What does he mean by that? 
Alhaitham reached his hand out. He smirked as you accepted his handshake.
His strong grip feels oddly familiar... You would think that you've known him from somewhere but you are still an Akademiya graduate. You need more evidence to support that gut feeling of yours.
"I like you. Let's get along for the next 5 years."
"Until you find a suitable idol for me." You answered without malice.
His face clenched slightly.
"Sure. Until you no longer need this company."
At that time, you should've noted that there's a difference between those two sentences.
-----
"I AM HERE." Your phone spoke in an AI voice.
It's been a long time since you had your first encounter with Kaveh & Venti and that interview with Alhaitham. Nowadays, you work hard to please the latter. 
You opened your phone. TeyvatPro's app logo is a heart-shaped leaf, but it's anything but natural and comforting. It's corporate and cold. The AKASHA - Device Policy app served as a reminder that you've long abandoned your old job and entered a new business environment.
You miss your old boss. You miss your old colleagues.  
You looked around, unfazed. It's just one of many features the AKASHA app has; it allows Alhaitham to make your phone speak whenever he's searching for you. Since you're usually around wherever he is, this tracker sufficed.
The door opened. You committed the painful error of fulfilling his demands at an ungodly hour of the night, and now Alhaitham has sent you more tasks.
Alhaitham pocketed his phone after seeing you. He just used it to make your phone ring. The AKASHA app doesn't allow you to silence his calls. It'll only stop saying "I AM HERE" once your boss turns it off.
"Mx. (Y/n)."
"Here are the files, sir." 
Miffed at the exasperation in your boss's tone, you cast your eyes downwards as you passed his folder. However, you have to face him head on or he'll begin his streak of "professional" insults. 
You won't let him run his mouth just yet. "Would that be all?"
Alhaitham didn't look like he was in his best mood. As he looked through the folder, skimming through each page with hawk-like eyes, you noticed two strange papers on his desk.
Is that... your file?
"S-Sir, permission to speak?"
"Granted."
"Why is my resume on your desk?" You showed your best poker face because you knew that your next words aren't pleasant. 
"Am I fired?"
Alhaitham spoke immediately, not looking up to face you. "You're uncharacteristically confrontational. Is it because it's 2 in the morning?"
He's wrong about the hour– you're always begrudgingly bending your schedule for your bosses– but he's right about your "lack of spine." However, while you don't need another ulcer, you need this job.
Alhaitham continued, now sporting a more pronounced frown.
"How did you arrive at such a conclusion? I took you as my assistant for good reasons and your groundless inference shames this company."
"I... Pardon?" Rude.
"Perhaps it was wrong for me to assume that you possessed a greater aptitude for critical thinking," Alhaitham spoke sardonically. "Take a look at the desk again. The reason why your resume is there should be obvious."
"Is that right?..."
You glanced at his desk again, gaining unspoken permission to touch and move papers on your boss's desk. When you did, the underlying reason became apparent.
Kaveh's file is also on his desk.
With nowhere to turn, you came up with a single hypothesis.
"Does... Does this mean..." 
You beamed a wonderful smile at your boss, unable back your excitement. "Does this mean I'll be reassigned as Kaveh's producer?!"
He smirked.
Unbeknownst to you, Alhaitham was pleased as you started associating his motivations with another cause entirely. 
You grabbed Kaveh's resume, grinning from ear to ear as you fan your face. "Holy. Oh my God. I'll finally be an idol's producer!"
"Kaveh is still a trainee," Alhaitham replied but you didn't hear him.
There's no better fit for you to work with than someone as theatric as Kaveh. Visual kei, rock, disco– it makes virtually no difference what Kaveh's idol genre will be; you don't care as long as it sounds nice! In addition to being the only noisy members of the "ABC" or "Alhaitham Bashing Coalition," you both graduated from Akademiya, thus it's impossible for you two to not be close friends. 
"I've never seen a person this happy for getting a downgrade."
"Then clearly you don't know what it's like for people who abandoned their engineering careers to pursue art."
"No. No, I don't." Alhaitham said, picking up more folders in his drawer. "Send this to Miss Minci down the first floor and you'll be excused for the day."
As you should've been in the first place. Today was a Sunday.
"Of course! Thank you so much, sir Alhaitham!"
He nodded, uninterested.
"Don't forget to close the door on your way out." 
--------
"I'm taking Kaveh off the list."
"No, it's nothing personal– never mind. Yes, it is. Alice, I can't tolerate it. If I could swap out Venti for Scaramouche on 5wirl, I would. They're too enmeshed with my assistant's business. They don't know (Y/n) any longer than I have, yet they act like they've been friends with them since they were young while they can barely recall who I am."
"I've looked at Kaveh's file and honestly, only an idiot would miss that he wants to join TeyvatProductions to spite me. He knows my history with (Y/n). He knows what I did to their old company."
"... Hah. Please. They're not going to resign. I listen to their phone calls– they're not going to leave until they pay off their student loans and other debts."
You swallowed dryly. By now you were supposed to be at home, but Miss Minci instructed you to return Alhaitham's folder with her revisions and now you can't help but listen while hiding behind the bookshelf in morbid curiosity.
Consequently, you are now hearing sounds that were not intended for your ears.
"... (Y/n)? A pet?"
Alhaitham laughed.
A pet...?
Your breath hitched as you recalled a conversation you had with Venti months prior.
---------
"Haven't you ever wondered why the big boss never takes his earphone out?"
Whenever you two are alone together, Venti makes sure you turn off your phone when speaking to him. You never understood the reason why before this talk.
"Nope."
"Seriously?" Venti blew a raspberry. "Bullshit– ain't no way. You've never thought that, hmm, maybe he's listening to our conversations? Not even once?"
Alhaitham looks at you like an ant lining up in a row: with clear indifference and little regard, yet he is confident that you serve a purpose no matter how insignificant it may be. You noticed that the ability to exercise control matters to him. Alhaitham is obsessed with omniscience in the most subtle way. He is slightly despised by his people, therefore he used you as a subpar pawn to observe their behavior.
Deep down, you know he has no need for an assistant; you're only here to boost his pride. Hence, you tossed that hypothesis out the window.
"No, I doubt he has the time for that." You said after contemplating.
"Gosh, you're naive," Venti sighed. "You're book smart but not street smart, aren't you?"
"Hah?"
"C'mon, just admit it, (Y/n)," the idol frowned.
"Isn't it obvious that Alhaitham's keeping you like a pet?"
----------
So that's what you are.
Now that you overheard Alhaitham's phone call, everything pieced itself together and it terrifies you.
"They're not a pet to me. They were once my mentor–" Alhaitham muttered.
You took a step back.
Shit.
He must've heard that.
You didn't mean to snoop around. You're not a bad person. You just wanted to drop a few more folders. You didn't mean to eavesdrop–
"... (Y/n), are you there?"
You didn't breathe as you continued hiding behind the bookshelf.
You can't handle this right now. Confrontations are something you do not trust yourself with. 
You stole a glance at Alhaitham as if seeing him for the first time. There sat a man with a veneer of calm. A man you've never met before.
"... Hmph."
Alhaitham pulled out his phone.
His face, his smirk, his breathing... they're now entirely alien to you.
Your phone rang.
"I AM HERE."
Your blood froze.
Anxiety coursed through your veins, not to recede but to possess. Your reaction is almost immediate yet his impinged movements served to make your heart run faster. You propel your heels to the door in a noisy attempt to leave even while you heard his chair drag against the floor, making his way toward you effortlessly. 
Then his cold hand was clamped above yours, holding you and the doorknob with intense firmness.
You trembled.
His grip feels like deja vu.
"There you are. Why are you still here, my assistant?" 
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ANSYTEA: hehe thank you ✾ anon for joining the 1k event <333!!!
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sirguyofdykesborn · 7 months
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how are you a lesbian but he him
please... the pronouns is all i have left of my father
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bulkhummus · 4 months
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🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚I'm throwing eggs at you 🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚 egg attack
🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳 im cooking them faster 🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳🍳than you can throw them
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gaylactic-fire · 4 months
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snaxle · 9 months
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you should explode. this isnt a hate anon i just think you would benefit from the enrichment
this is single handedly the funniest ask ive ever gotten
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cahootings · 7 months
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“their relationship is too deep to be sexual” what’s deeper than dick in hole. please tell me
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punkitt-is-here · 4 months
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Deranged transfem here. Im planning on making a custom virtual assistant, think siri/cortana, but it doesnt steal your data. Gonna give it my deadname and voice, so I can torture my parents by trapping their son's soul in my phone, and if they deadname me he reaponds so I can just pretend theyre not talking to me.
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shinobicyrus · 3 months
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Why do you need your earbuds to have a wire so badly?
I am assuming this is about a post I reblogged like six months ago when I went off on forced technological enshitification and the slow erosion of consumer options. But sure, I'll bite.
Why do I "need" my earbuds to have a wire? I dunno, Anon, maybe I:
Don't want to have to worry about recharging my earbuds.
Don't want my earbuds to be even easier to lose.
Don't want my earbuds to need separate accessories that are as easy to lose as the earbuds.
Prefer to have bluetooth turned off on my devices for security and safety reasons.
Like being able to seamlessly plug my earbuds into my computer, my MP3 player, or any other device with a headphone jack.
Don't want to spend 50 dollars on decent wireless earbuds when I can do all the above things with a pair of solid earbuds that cost me like $12 during the Obama administration.
Don't care about what kinds of headphones or earbuds people wear but don't like what it says about our society when other people apparently care what kind of earbuds I'm wearing so much they have send an Anonymous ask to interrogate me about it.
And I guess, more abstractly, because fuck Apple. That's why.
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anonpolls · 25 days
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Thanks for the question, Anon!
-submit your poll!-
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yaoiboypussy · 2 months
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“I can’t be a trans man on the internet” go the fuck outside then dude. Signed a trans woman who has had enough of your bullshit posts
I’m gonna use this ask to make a point.
Trans guys if you get an anon claiming to be a trans women that says rude/bigoted shit, don’t believe them. Transphobes have admitted to pretending to be trans women and sending bigoted asks to trans men.
If you get an anon ask saying weird shit claiming to be from a trans women - always remember anons can lie about who they are! 9 times out of 10 it’s just some cis person lying to paint trans women as evil bigots.
And everytime I see a trans man fall for the bait and start saying transmisogynistic shit I just sigh.
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throwaway-yandere · 1 year
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Incorrect Producer Quotes from the Yan Idol!Genshin Event
Cause it's the holidays and this is my apology for all the crap you've all went through working at TeyPro hAHAHAHHA
---
Assistant ✾: sure, I don't get a "healthy" amount of sleep like SOME PEOPLE do but can they do THIS *stands up, blacks out for a second*
---
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---
Producer Fox: hostage or not, sometimes it's nice being held
Producer Hundred: ... Bro, you good?
---
Producer Snail: hey heizou I got something to show you
Heizou: You hit "send" on that picture of Mike Wazowski and I hit "end" on our friendship.
Producer Snail: I don't have anything to show you
---
Producer ESTHER: Kaeya lost one of his eye today and is not doing well. He is at the hospital. Please pray for him
Assistant Baker: Oh no! Hope he's okay!
Producer Oyst: Is it bad?
Zhongli:
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Zhongli: Osmanthus latte I drank today.
Producer Dove: What? Why send that now?
Zhongli: It looked like it was smiling.
---
Heizou: How to Become my Lover
Heizou: Step 1: Act like we are already lovers thereby skipping over the awkward "becoming friends first" part.
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Producer Fox: why don't murderers just hide the bodies at the empty spaces at the Grand Narukami agrarian reform hectares?
Ayato: thanks for the tip.
Producer Fox: no this is not a tip this is a joke
---
About Producer Dove:
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Kaeya: Compliment me
Producer ESTHER: you have eyes
Kaeya: Nice
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Diluc: GIRLS DONT READ this ones just for the fellas, only guys will get this one, bros you know when youre at the gym workin on your 'toids to get big for the sports well OKAY I'm sure the ladies have stopped reading by now, so what's their deal? how do I tell the girls I love them without having to talk? I'm scared
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Producer Snail: I have no relevant skills. I am unpleasant to work with. I like to cause problems.
Executive Producer Alice: hired.
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The producers: the CEO was totally flirting with you just then
Assistant ✾: The CEO was mocking me at best and most likely casting a curse on me–
AKASHA: I AM HERE.
Assistant ✾: See?
---
Producer Sage: Hunger and sex are different sorts of motivations. Hunger responds to a need. If we don't eat, we die, but sex is not in this sense a need. If we don't have sex, we may feel like dying, but we're not.
Childe: How do you know nobody ever died from lack of sex?
Producer Sage: Because you're still alive.
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Dottore #1 @ Assistant Bakery: I would follow you to the ends of the earth with only mild complaining.
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Cyno: so today i accidentally gave a bus driver a yu-gi-oh card instead of my buspass again
Solitary: again?
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"Ribbon": What is the weirdest thing a complete stranger has done to you?
Solitary, about Cyno: I got on the bus and a drunk man tried to hand me a beer and I said "it's okay sir, I'm alright" and then he handed me a dollar and went, "I saw that guy took your dollar, that was messed up." And I was like, "The bus driver?"
Solitary: He wouldn't take his dollar back.
---
Dottore (?): shapeshifting is hypothetically the best super power to have. You can have any haircut and change two strands of your hair to make them longer. You can turn into an aranara, you can turn into a ruin guard, you can turn into a shambling mound of abstract shapes and sulk outside your estranged CEO's house at night while chanting ominously about his sins.
Assistant Bakery: This took a weird turn, but I'm on board for it
---
Assistant Bakery: Assistant Piano and the 5wirl challenged us for a water fight.
Dottore: I'm in
Dottore: Just waiting for the water to boil
Assistant Bakery: What
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captainkirkk · 2 months
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So I've been making marionette puppets of my neighbors (I'm taking a class) and let me tell you my landlord/building manager was SUPER not prepared to see the wooden version of him (he lives on my floor) when he came in to fix my stove
Anon no offense but I think I would call the police if I found out one of my neighbours was making wooden puppets of me without my knowledge
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endusviolence · 3 months
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Rowling isn't denying holocaust. She just pointed out that burning of transgender health books is a lie as that form of cosmetic surgery didn't exist. But of course you knew that already, didn't you?
I was thinking I'd probably see one of you! You're wrong :) Let's review the history a bit, shall we?
In this case, what we're talking about is the Institut für Sexualwissenschaft, or in English, The Institute of Sexology. This Institute was founded and headed by a gay Jewish sexologist named Magnus Hirschfeld. It was founded in July of 1919 as the first sexology research clinic in the world, and was run as a private, non-profit clinic. Hirschfeld and the researchers who worked there would give out consultations, medical advice, and even treatments for free to their poorer clientele, as well as give thousands of lectures and build a unique library full of books on gender, sexuality, and eroticism. Of course, being a gay man, Hirschfeld focused a lot on the gay community and proving that homosexuality was natural and could not be "cured".
Hirschfeld was unique in his time because he believed that nobody's gender was either one or the other. Rather, he contended that everyone is a mixture of both male and female, with every individual having their own unique mix of traits.
This leads into the Institute's work with transgender patients. Hirschfeld was actually the one to coin the term "transsexual" in 1923, though this word didn't become popular phrasing until 30 years later when Harry Benjamin began expanding his research (I'll just be shortening it to trans for this brief overview.) For the Institute, their revolutionary work with gay men eventually began to attract other members of the LGBTA+, including of course trans people.
Contrary to what Anon says, sex reassignment surgery was first tested in 1912. It'd already being used on humans throughout Europe during the 1920's by the time a doctor at the Institute named Ludwig Levy-Lenz began performing it on patients in 1931. Hirschfeld was at first opposed, but he came around quickly because it lowered the rate of suicide among their trans patients. Not only was reassignment performed at the Institute, but both facial feminization and facial masculization surgery were also done.
The Institute employed some of these patients, gave them therapy to help with other issues, even gave some of the mentioned surgeries for free to this who could not afford it! They spoke out on their behalf to the public, even getting Berlin police to help them create "transvestite passes" to allow people to dress however they wanted without the threat of being arrested. They worked together to fight the law, including trying to strike down Paragraph 175, which made it illegal to be homosexual. The picture below is from their holiday party, Magnus Hirschfeld being the gentleman on the right with the fabulous mustache. Many of the other people in this photo are transgender.
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[Image ID: A black and white photo of a group of people. Some are smiling at the camera, others have serious expressions. Either way, they all seem to be happy. On the right side, an older gentleman in glasses- Magnus Hirschfeld- is sitting. He has short hair and a bushy mustache. He is resting one hand on the shoulder of the person in front of him. His other hand is being held by a person to his left. Another person to his right is holding his shoulder.]
There was always push back against the Institute, especially from conservatives who saw all of this as a bad thing. But conservatism can't stop progress without destroying it. They weren't willing to go that far for a good while. It all ended in March of 1933, when a new Chancellor was elected. The Nazis did not like homosexuals for several reasons. Chief among them, we break the boundaries of "normal" society. Shortly after the election, on May 6th, the book burnings began. The Jewish, gay, and obviously liberal Magnus Hirschfeld and his library of boundary-breaking literature was one of the very first targets. Thankfully, Hirschfeld was spared by virtue of being in Paris at the time (he would die in 1935, before the Nazis were able to invade France). His library wasn't so lucky.
This famous picture of the book burnings was taken after the Institute of Sexology had been raided. That's their books. Literature on so much about sexuality, eroticism, and gender, yes including their new work on trans people. This is the trans community's Alexandria. We're incredibly lucky that enough of it survived for Harry Benjamin and everyone who came after him was able to build on the Institute's work.
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[Image ID: A black and white photo of the May Nazi book burning of the Institute of Sexology's library. A soldier, back facing the camera, is throwing a stack of books into the fire. In the background of the right side, a crowd is watching.]
As the Holocaust went on, the homosexuals of Germany became a targeted group. This did include transgender people, no matter what you say. To deny this reality is Holocaust denial. JK Rowling and everyone else who tries to pretend like this isn't reality is participating in that evil. You're agreeing with the Nazis.
But of course, you knew that already, didn't you?
Edit: Added image IDs. I apologize to those using screen readers for forgetting them. Please reblog this version instead.
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spirallingstarcases · 10 months
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top five men?
like in a row? or do i get breaks
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paper-mario-wiki · 6 months
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Any tips for when trying weed for the first time?
smoke a lot of it and if you dont get high instantly smoke a lot more and if you start feeling scared that means youre about to die
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therainbowwillow · 6 months
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hbomberguy’s latest video on plagiarism has made me completely rethink literature and writing. I have never once so much as considered intentionally plagiarizing anyone or anything, but I think there’s something more that has come out of this: the names of the people who created the works Somerton (and others) ripped off.
Plagiarism isn’t only bad because it is lazy and disrespectful, it’s bad because it buries the truth. If you can’t find a source, the conversation is over. Somerton’s sources are fairly easy to find by simply searching his plagiarized lines, but that isn’t true in most cases. Most of the time, the line from statement to source is a lot less clear.
Today, I was writing a report on English Ivy, which is an invasive species here in the US. I wanted to know when it was introduced and I at last found a source claiming it was introduced to the Americas “as early as 1727” on a .net website that seems quite reputable (it has multiple major universities credited in its home page), but there is no citation for where this date came from. I dug deeper and found a pamphlet created by a city government in Virginia that made the same claim, only to discover the first source linked in their bibliography. Another website (a botanical garden’s page) gave the same date with the same source hyperlinked. Of course, I have classes to attend and things to do and probably not enough time to follow the lines back to where this 1727 date came from, but if I had not just watched this video, I wouldn’t have given that date a second thought.
Of course, it doesn’t matter in the long run exactly what year hedera helix was introduced to the Americas, but it makes you wonder how many facts have been so vaguely attributed that it becomes completely impossible to figure out where they originated (and further, whether or not they’re true at all).
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