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#ACTUALLY BE all of those things but she's NOT
babyyhoneyyy · 2 days
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I wanna kiss your neck H.S
“You mean a lot to me too, Harry. You’re my best friend.”
He grinned. “Oh? You let all your best friends eat your pussy and choke you, then?”
“Don’t be a dick,” she smacked his chest lightheartedly, “we can try like… friends with benefits?”
Or,
The one where Y/N and Harry are best friends, but they’ve crossed a big, fat line that says otherwise.
You can read this as a stand-alone but its more fun as a part two to this one <3
word count: 4K
content warning: mature. I got a little carried away 😭 also fwb!harry (my fav)
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When Y/N woke up the next day, Harry was pressed tightly to her back, arm slithered around her waist and stuffing her impossibly closer to his slumbering body. She could feel the rumbling of his snores against her spine and he must have sneaked into her bed after she fell asleep, ditching the couch pallet she prepared for him in her living room. He had a habit of doing that so she wasn’t shocked or alarmed by his sudden appearance behind her.
All Y/N could really think about was what the actual heck happened the past night when Harry offered to ‘make her feel good.’ She would be lying if she said he didn’t make her come harder than anyone else ever had. The way he worked her body had her all hot and bothered again, restless in Harry’s tight grip when he groaned all of a sudden, all raspy and deep right in her ear, “stop moving, Berry.”
Berry.
He hadn’t called her that in a while. It was a nickname he often resorted to when Y/N and him were little, their first meeting being one where Harry caught Y/N blue-stained and sticky-fingered in the playground because she was inhaling the berries her mum packed her for a snack. He pointed at her face with a stern look and said the singular word, Berry. And from then on it stuck, all the way up till they were seniors in high school, where the name lost its appeal and Harry got whisked away into the hot, popular persona he adopted at the time.
After that he sparingly said the word, it only slipping out in unconscious or vulnerable moments, and apparently that morning was one too.
When she twisted in his grasp so she faced him, Harry blinked one eye open, “go back to bed. It’s the weekend for fucks sake.” He shuffled so he was facing her on his side, not withdrawing his hand fully as it still rested in the dip of her waist and thumbed over the smooth skin there. He had ditched his sweater for the night, just in a pair of soft sweatpants. His hair was pulled back in a bun but most of the strands were free now, thanks to his restless tossing and turning in bed. “I know it's the weekend, it doesn’t mean we laze around all morning. I have things to do.”
“Who said anything about all morning? Just five more minutes.”
Five more minutes turned into ten, and ten minutes later Harry somehow made his way between her thighs again. It started with him stroking her side, up to her shoulder and scratching his nails against her scalp. When she would try to make a move to leave bed and freshen up, he thumbed over her jugular and pushed her to lay on her back, scooting closer to her so he could lean over her side.
“Want me to eat you out again?”
It’s a terrible ploy to keep her in bed— one so outrageous it actually works and Y/N finds herself quickly nodding, slipping her hands in his hair to pull his hair tie. He kissed down her neck, sloppy and slow, all the way across her tummy and the tops of her thighs. She didn’t wear anything on her bottom half since she thought she was going to be sleeping alone but that proved a good decision when Harry had easy access to her sopping cunt.
From then on it was as good as it was the first time. In fact, it might have been even better. He was passionate as he stuffed his face into her, lifted her thighs so they bracketed his cheeks like he wanted to suffocate himself. His tongue was unrelenting, wriggling between her folds and making those noises that made Y/N’s face and neck go red as she pulled his locks harshly between her fingers. When he pulled out his favourite move of isolating her clit and flicking the tip of tongue against it hard and fast, it had Y/N shaking and whining out loud. She was brought to the edge very quickly after that, back arching and a loud gasp spilling from her mouth.
Harry popped off from her with a filthy sound, wiped his chin with the back of his hand and smirked up at her fucked-out state.
After that, it became some sort of trend.
Every weekend, Harry would come over to her apartment like he normally did, they’d chat about their week, pick out a movie and crack open a bag of chips only for Harry to nudge her mid-movie with his eyes sparkling and lip between his teeth and he’d ask her if he could go down on her again. So he would, and it would be amazing every time. Somehow he was even more enthusiastic than he was the last time, licking into her eagerly. It was like he wanted to drown in all she offered and one night he refused to let her go, slicking her folds over and over again until she came about three times.
Everytime he made her come she’d ask to return the favour since he was always sporting a painfully large bulge when he pulled away from her. Yet every time he politely declined— told her he was fine and would take care of it himself.
But this time Y/N was not letting that happen.
She was hell-bent tonight on getting him to come, no matter how much he persisted she didn’t need to do anything for him. Y/N knew tonight would be like the others— he’d find himself face-first between her thighs within 20 minutes of walking through her door. It’s not like she didn’t appreciate his very obvious oral fixation, it was just that her body was beginning to get used to his delivery of orgasms every weekend and she now had a different sort of ache that she needed to get fixed.
The ache to be filled up by him.
The burn of his cock inside of her was one she found herself craving often. She knew he was big by the way he would sometimes press his bulge against her thigh for some relief. All she wanted was for him to sink inside of her, reach all those spots she just knew he’d be able to hit and fuck into her nice and deep.
Obviously this was crossing a big, fat, red line.
Y/N and Harry were friends.
Best friends, in fact, ever since they were in the playground. Just the fact that he was spending his weekends suffocated by her pussy was definitely against the rules childhood best friends were bound to follow, but maybe they could venture into something more than just that— and Y/N didn’t mean dating.
Maybe something like a friends with benefits situation.
Yeah, Y/N didn’t mind having an arrangement of that sort with Harry. Besides, she trusted him, and surely their bond was strong enough to go through with it.
When he arrived at her door at about 7PM, Y/N jumped to quickly open it, finding Harry standing there with a single dimple making an appearance, hair pushed back and clad in a pair of matching sweatpants and a hoodie. He didn’t waste a beat in pressing himself against her, his greedy hands all over her waist as he walked her back into her apartment. “Hey,” he breathed, kissing her just below her ear, “I missed you.”
Y/N heard the door shut behind him, her eyelids fluttering under the feel of his lips against her skin, suckling warm kisses across the skin. “You saw me last weekend.”
“Mm. Too long.”
Harry’s voice was muffled against her skin, and he pulled back to brush his nose against her, his hands now sneakily resting against her bare waist. “It’s just seven days you horndog.”
“Heyy. Don’t say that like you hadn’t missed me either.” He pouted, shoving her hip so she fell back on the couch. Harry quickly climbed over her, hips snug between her thighs as he tenderly brushed her hair away from her forehead. Y/N could feel her cheeks heating up as he stared right at her. “Yeah,” she accepted defeat, like his eyes had fed her some sort of truth serum, “I missed you too. A lot.”
He must have liked her answer, because he pecks her cheek, then the corner of her mouth, then skips right over to the top of her chest exposed by the low neckline of her shirt, “did you, now? What about me did you miss, Berry?”
She didn’t respond for a while, lost in the feel of his mouth against her skin, trailing lower and lower until he pushed her shirt up and over her tits. The peaks of her nipples were pebbled, practically begging for Harry to wrap his mouth around them. Warm fingers slivered up her tummy to squeeze both her tits in his palm harshly. “Asked you a question.”
“Fuck,” those same fingers travelled over to her nipples, pinching the sensitive bud until her back arched off of the sofa, “um, your mouth.” The words barely left her throat as she struggled to keep her composure, squeezing Harry between her thighs so tightly he was afraid he’d get bruises on his hips. “That’s nice. Using me for my mouth, then are you? Quite selfish if you ask me.” Y/N knew he was only joking, but she couldn’t help bucking her hip into his, twisting his hair between her fingers.
“I’m not selfish! Just… need you.”
She barely recognised her voice, it sounding whiney and desperate as Harry finally dragged his tongue against her nipple, index finger and thumb bracketing her breast as he held it to his mouth. The way he moved his tongue was almost calculated; careful and thoughtful as he figured out the way to best please her— flicking the muscle against her bud, grazing it with his teeth and lulling long, slow circles around it. “S’okay. You can have my mouth. It’s all yours anyway.”
He popped off from her chest, leaving her a heaving and whimpery mess, though before he could fit his shoulders between her thighs, Y/N was quick to pull him back up with his hair so he was level with her face. The burn against his scalp made him groan as he stared down at Y/N, quite annoyed that she stopped him from having his treat.
“I want something else tonight,” she breathed. His eyebrows dipped slightly as he brought a large hand to wrap around her throat— one of his favourite ways to hold her, “what do you need, princess?”
He was subtly grinding his hips against her, pinning her against the couch as she tried to figure out the words to say what she wanted. “I need you to fuck me. Please.”
All movements paused. His fingers tightened around her throat and his eyes became a shade darker. “S’that what this is then? All needy to get my cock inside of you?” Harry’s thumb subtly caressed the side of her throat as he nudged his nose against hers, “hmm?”
”Yes, please. I need it so bad, Harry.”
She gave him the best doe eyes she could, biting her lip for added effect. Even though Harry was a weak man for a pretty pout, he had to think rationally here. His eyes softened as he stared down at his best friend— if he could even call her that at this point. “Are you sure, Berry? I don’t… I don’t want to do anything that could ruin what we have,” his thumb made its way to her cheek where he stroked lovingly, “you mean a lot to me.”
“You mean a lot to me too, Harry. You’re my best friend.”
He grinned. “Oh? You let all your best friends eat your pussy and choke you, then?”
“Don’t be a dick,” she smacked his chest lightheartedly, “we can try like… friends with benefits?”
This made him somehow smirk even wider and Y/N’s cheeks got warmer, “gosh I just am that irresistible aren’t I?” She rolled her eyes, “don’t make me take it back.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He kissed her forehead then her nose, “‘course I’ll fuck you. I’ll do whatever you want, baby.”
With that, he pulled his sweater off of his head and helped Y/N with her shirt. She had seen him shirtless before numerous times but never allowed herself to ogle him in a sexual way. She didn’t hold back as she let her fingers trail all over his tanned skin, squeezing his sides and pulling him closer so there was practically no space between the two. Harry giggled at her desperation. “Horny, Berry?”
Y/N smacked his head for real this time. “Shut up.”
He rubbed the spot she struck, “that hurt.”
“Well too bad,” she let her fingers work on the knot of his sweats, hastily trying to push them off of his hips but Harry had other plans— long fingers came to wrap around her wrists, pulling her hands away from him and pinning them next to her head. “You’re so fucking bratty all the time. Thought maybe all those orgasms were helping but clearly I wasn’t giving it to you hard enough.”
She whined in his grasp, trying to break free. While he held her hands in one of his, he let the other trail down her body and slip into her shorts. He came into contact with her wet cunt immediately, sliding his index and middle finger through the folds, slowly, surely. He tsked, “slutty pussy.” The words went straight to her throbbing clit as she bucked her hips against his hand, though she was crying out loud when Harry let his fingers slap over the bundle of nerves. “Be patient, Y/N.” She frowned at his words, trying her best to keep her composure.
All the while his fingers continued to explore her folds, not applying any pressure where she really wanted, just feeling around like her wetness amused him. The moment she felt like she was actually going to cry, he slipped a finger into her heat. “Fuck,” he pumped his digit slowly, “perfect little cunt.”
Y/N’s fingers twisted and writhed under his hold, back arching as he showered her in praises, lips pressing against her jaw and neck. Her thighs shook when he curled his finger against that one spot, and she knew a couple more seconds of this and she’d be coming undone around his fingers.
Before she could succumb to her orgasm, Harry pulled his fingers out and stuffed them into her mouth. Her opportunity to protest was taken away from her as he forced her to taste herself, stroking his fingers against her tongue, “s’that good, baby? You’re lucky I’m sharing today. Can’t let anyone else know how sweet this pussy is for me.”
Once she was done sucking him clean, he straightened up to pull her shorts off and got off the couch to kick off his own sweats and boxers. His cock slapped up against his abdomen, long and thick and the way it throbbed looked like it was almost painful. One of his hands came to wrap around it while the other pulled a condom out of his wallet. He climbed back on the couch and pulled her by the hips. Y/N slid closer to him, “ready for me, Berry?” He murmured as he rolled the condom on his length.
Y/N couldn’t find the words to tell him how badly she needed him, only let her nails dig into his skin and nodded eagerly, “yes, yes, yes please. I’m so ready, Harry, need i—“
He didn’t let her finish, cutting her off with a deep groan as he impaled her with his dick. She could feel him snug against her— all of him inside all of her. The squelch that resounded in the room when they came together was loud and embarrassing as Y/N moaned uncontrollably, pulsing rhythmically around him trying to adjust to his size. His slow place built up to something faster and harder, the sound of skin slapping skin making Y/N even wetter.
It was a surprise he wasn’t straight up slipping out of her with how wet she was. She could feel it coat the inside of her thighs when he brought one of her legs up and over his shoulder. The new angle made everything feel a hundred times better— he was hitting places she didn’t even know she could reach. Harry’s hands held onto her hips tightly, one of them sneaking over her mound as his thumb came in contact with her clit. The added stimulation made her squeeze her eyes shut, head angling away and into the sofa beneath her.
He didn’t let her look away, though, as he bit back a moan and brought his free hand to grab her face. His fingers squeezed her cheeks as he manhandled her to face him, “don’t fucking look away from me,” he leaned closer to her. His hips stopped pumping and he resorted to deep, filthy grinds against her g-spot. “Look at me when I’m fucking you. Bet no one’s ever given it to you so good, hmm?”
She can’t find it in herself to come back with a witty remark, so far gone with the feel of him stuffed inside her. It was like he reduced her to nothing but babbles and whines, “uh-huh, uh-huh, yes please, Harry.” Her fingers found his hair again, pulling the locks hard and then tucking them behind his ear. He found himself locked in a tender moment when his eyes met hers, and he pressed a soft kiss to her brow bone before he began thrusting again.
Somehow he was harder, deeper, faster and pulling so much out of Y/N she was ready to burst. Her moans began sounding annoying to herself but she just couldn’t help it, especially not when he began circling her clit again. It took only a couple more seconds and she was coming around his cock, back lifting off of the couch almost too harshly as she clamped down around him. “Tha’s it, gorgeous. So beautiful you are, Berry.”
Harry worked her through it, her warm, wet walls beckoning him closer to his end. “Wait!” She called desperately when her orgasm subsided, “come… come in my mouth, please?”
“Jesus Christ.” He pulled out quickly, ripping the condom off and letting his fingers gather her arousal. The sensation made her flinch in sensitivity but she got over it when she saw him use her arousal as a lubricant, pumping himself as he leaned over her body. Y/N dropped her mouth open and stared right into his eyes. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
When he came, it was a lot.
White, hot spurts that Y/N tried to catch with her tongue, and he just kept coming and coming and coming. The sounds he made were enough to make her all riled up again— his eyebrows furrowed, hair tickling his upper back as he tilted his head. Some of it landed on her jaw and chin but she swallowed as much as she could; which was only what actually made it on her tongue. One long stroke was delivered, and only then was he done, posture slouching as he lazily eyed Y/N. “Incredible.”
She giggled at his praise, still covered in his release. His eyes on her were burning and a second later a mischievous glint made her tummy flutter, “one second.” He leaned over the couch to grab his phone, pulling open the camera app. Y/N’s eyes widened when she realised what he was implying. Harry smirked, “just as a keepsake.”
One of his ringed hands came up to her jaw, cupping it tightly as he forced her head to face the camera. The sight could make Harry come all over again— Y/N’s lips were parted, his come painting her jaw and chin and decorating the edge of her bottom lip. Her neck was littered in purple bruises from all the time he spent there and his hand served as an accessory which she wore with pride. His rings felt cool against her skin when they slid across her jugular.
“Say ‘queef’!”
Y/N’s nose scrunched, “Harry!”
He laughed when she slapped his hand away and quickly kissed her forehead, “I’ll be right back, babe.” Y/N hummed as he left to go to the bathroom, the sight of him covering his dick with his shirt with his bum out making her laugh.
She was so happy.
It might have been the post-orgasm high, but she couldn’t shake the feeling. Obviously the fact that she was doing all of this with her best friend was a big, blaring red flag but it was like she just didn’t care. He made her feel good and confident in her skin— something she hasn’t felt with a number of her past partners.
Just as she fluttered her eyes shut, the sound of Harry’s phone startled her. It was probably his roommate, Niall, wondering where he was. It was nearing 9PM.
She grabbed his phone to silence it, but what she saw made her freeze in her spot.
A picture of a gorgeous brunette flashed across the screen, her eyes twinkling and lips painted red.
Chelsea 🩵
She was smiling wide, and just on the corner of the screen did Y/N catch a glimpse of Harry pressing his lips to her temple.
Her Harry.
The one who’s been her best friend ever since she was in diapers.
Her Harry.
The one who just fucked the living daylights out of her.
Y/N didn’t know what to do so she just watched the phone ring and ring. It was like all the air from her lungs was stolen. Suddenly she felt gross lying here covered in Harry’s come, all that confidence melting away from her body. She felt used. Before she could let the tears threaten her eyes, Harry appeared in the living room. She dropped his phone before he could see.
He walked over to her with a towel in his hand. “You alright?” He asked her, noticing her stoic expression and quiet demeanour. “Mhmm.” Harry must have thought she was just tired after her orgasm, humming as he ran the towel across her thighs and then her jaw. “We did make quite a mess didn’t we?”
He was smirking, trying to get a rise out of her but she just couldn’t stomach the lump in her throat. She faked a laugh, “yeah.” If he noticed her dull responses, he didn’t say anything. When he was done, Y/N sat up and pulled her shirt over head. She was gnawing harshly on her lip, swallowing down tears and anger and confusion as she watched him pick up his phone. His eyebrows furrowed.
“Is everything okay?”
She didn’t know why she asked. Whatever he would say would only make matters worse for her. “Uh, yeah. Jus’ Niall wondering when I’ll be home.” He flashed her a small smile and Y/N felt like the walls of her apartment were crumbling around her. “I have to call him back, Berry, I’ll be right back.” A kiss was pressed to her cheek as he quickly left the room.
Y/N felt like she was suffocating under the weight of his lie. She was disgusted by herself— the same touches she yearned for and looked forward to each weekend now felt like a burden on her body, dirtying her. She wouldn’t let herself cry; she couldn’t let Harry see her like this.
a minute later he walked back in and began dressing himself. “I’ve got to go, Y/N. Sorry, I feel like an ass leaving you so soon but Niall needs me urgently,” he walked over to her, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
She swallowed down another sob, “mhmm.”
He pecked her forehead and whispered goodbye, leaving swiftly without so much as another glance in her direction. Only when her door slammed shut did she allow her tears to spill over her cheeks. They poured and poured like a leaky faucet as Y/N pulled her knees into her chest.
This was probably why he didn’t want to fuck her in the first place.
He was getting his fix elsewhere, and Y/N felt like a fool for ever believing they were anything more than best friends.
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HEYYYY this is just a load of filth :p let me know what your thoughts are and if you enjoyed it !! LEAVE FEEDBACK PLEASE ITS ALWAYS NICE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK !! LIKE REBLOG COMMENT REPLY YADA YADA KISS KISS GOODNIGHT!! xxx
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chemical override
Ewan Mitchell x actress!reader
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a/n: i caved and did an actual Ewan fic! Given that the lad is more of a public persona nowadays, I reckon it's fine (?) This is pure self-indulgence for all my Ewan loves. May have a continuation but idk for now, enjoy!!
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The reader and Ewan are paired for press interviews. Despite barely having any scenes together and only knowing each other in passing on set, the chemistry they share cannot be denied...
Your first round of press takes place in a primped up hotel suite in Paris, thanks to the team at HBO.
You are an up and coming actress, much like some of your costars in the show, but the pressure is heavier on you because you were entering in season two, whereas everyone was already well-acquainted with one another.
Your few scenes were mostly with Jace and Baela, so you grew close to Harry and Bethany.
However, the media team decided to pair you up with Ewan for the day. A little fun initiative was set by the team that a character from the Blacks would be do press with a counterpart from the Greens - hence, yourself and Ewan.
You're nervous as you walk down the hallway, unable to fully pay attention to the instructions your lovely assistant gives you.
She tells you about the different interviewers for the day, bloggers and magazine writers from all over the world. She reminds you that each one will only be for a maximum of 5 minutes, so it shouldn't be too complicated. She smiles and eagerly says, "Take a deep breath, you got this!", as you reach the suite doors.
But in your mind, all you can recall is your first interaction with Ewan, almost a year ago right after the table read. You had nervously blurted out to him that Aemond is your favourite character, after he just asked, "How are you?". He laughed, said thank you, before he was pulled away in conversation by Tom.
You pray to the fictional Westerosi gods that things will fare better today. That you won't get all tongue-tied when those steel blue eyes land on you.
Upon entering the room, the team is quick to fuss over you. Sometimes you forget that you're actually an actress now. A celebrity, some might say. It all feels surreal and you have a inkling it won't ever stop being this way.
Ewan is already seated in front of the camera, and he stands to give you a hug as you finally walk over.
"Hey there, how are you?" he smiles widely, smelling like cigarettes and something muskier as he wraps his arms around you.
Unroll your tongue. Rework your brain. Calm down.
"Hey, Ewan!" you respond. "I'm doing great, happy to see you again."
"Well, I only wish we could have had more time together on set." Ever the gentleman, he gestures for you to take your seat before he does the same. "But next season perhaps? Who knows?"
"Oh, sure." You settle in, pleased by the fact that your chairs are only about a foot apart. "We can both look forward to my character giving Aemond the arse kicking he deserves."
He laughs, eyes glinting with mischief. "Come on now, I was thinking our characters are actually quite compatible, no?"
"Well, I sure wouldn't want to step on Alys' shoes. She'd probably curse my character all the way to Yi Ti."
"Hmm," he hums, biting his lip. You can't help but hear Aemond when he does that. "I say you can always count on Aemond and Vhagar to come to the rescue of a beautiful maiden such as yourself."
Well, you'll be damned. Ewan, while still an introvert of his own sort, is as charming as can be. If he's turning it on to get himself hyped for the press, it's working.
It's definitely working on you, to say the least.
The media manager gives the signal for the first interview to begin, and a reporter walks in, all ready with prepared script in hand.
"Here we go," you mutter, facing forward.
"Good luck," Ewan replies.
You both shake the reporter's hand, and he introduces himself as Jared.
"So guys," Jared begins. "Why don't we start with you telling me a little bit about what we can expect from your characters this season?"
The question is easy, and it doesn't take long for you and Ewan to think it through. Jared asks a few more basic questions, before drawing the attention more to you.
"When you watched season one, did you have a favourite character?" he asks you.
You smile, "Oh, I mean, I have to say - and Ewan already knows this, by the way - that Aemond was my favourite character."
"Was?" Ewan says, feigning shock. "Unacceptable."
"Was... Is... " you shrug, rolling your eyes playfully, earning a laugh from Jared. "I think I might be more a Daemon girl now."
"Oh!" Jared exclaims happily. "Does Matt know about this?"
"I'll be sure to tell him - "
Ewan interjects, shaking his head at you, "There's no need to tell him, because I'll convert her back to Team Aemond in no time, trust me."
"Daemon is awesome, though," you say to him, smiling.
"Sure." Ewan makes a face like that fact doesn't matter. Wasn't he the one who said that Daemon would be the character he would most like to play if not Aemond?
"And Caraxes is my favourite dragon." You share a look with Jared, hoping he would agree.
"Yes!" Jared says. "Caraxes is the best dragon in the show, in my opinion."
"Ah, you're both wrong," Ewan says. "My Vhagar is the oldest and baddest dragon in all of the land."
"My Vhagar, he says," you joke. "Seems like someone still hasn't shed Aemond for this press tour."
"And I never will, darling." His gaze is intense when he turns to you, and you clear your throat to fight the warmth rushing to your cheeks.
"Alright, they're giving me the wrap-up," Jared thankfully breaks the tension. "It was a pleasure talking to you guys, congratulations on the new season!"
One interview down, and your nerves have already considerably subsided. Ewan tapping your arm to start up a conversation once more surely helps in distracting you.
In the best damn way possible.
"How do you think we did? That wasn't too bad, was it?"
"I think we did quite well," you casually offer a high five, but your heart skips a beat when Ewan interlaces your suspended hands for just a moment.
"I'm glad they paired me with you," Ewan says, after releasing your hand. You hold on to the armrests to keep your fingers from twitching.
"I am, too," you admit. "I am a fan of you, after all, but I think you already know that."
He blushes, "Well, that's not a bad thing. I think you're a fantastic actress. I must have seen your first film a good ten times."
"You mean my first and only film," you add humbly. "But thank you."
"Only film for now," he affirms. "No doubt this is only the beginning for you, darling. With your talent and your charisma, I'm sure you have potential scripts piled up already."
"I could say the same for you! Have you seen what your fans say about you online? You're the internet's new boyfriend, Ewan Mitchell."
The media manager announces the next interview, but Ewan follows up with a response for you under his breath, "I have seen some things. But when I have a girlfriend, I'll make sure she won't have to share me at all."
Oh, so apparently he is single. But wait - why is he telling you this?
You don't get to mull over that thought. For the time being, the next interview starts and you make sure you do a good job at what you're paid to do - promoting the series.
Not daydreaming about getting with a costar, for heaven's sake. Stay professional.
▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎
You feel lightheaded after finishing the seventh - or had it been the eighth? - interview.
Your assistant delivers a coffee to you during the twenty-minute break. Ewan had stepped out to the balcony to have a smoke, leaving you alone with your thoughts.
He certainly is everything you expected him to be, and so much more. Insightful, cheeky, dedicated. An artist, through and through. He was in the business for all the right reasons, passion and respect for the craft.
If he had any flaws, you weren't privy to them yet. If there are any reasons for you not to be attracted to him, you didn't know what those were yet.
But with every flirtatious remark and pointed smile, you can't deny the hope blooming in you.
"Hey," he reappears, pulling you out of your musings. "I hope you don't mind that I smell of smoke."
No, you didn't, not when it's him.
"Don't worry about it," you reassure him. You tilt your head forward to take a sip of your coffee, but a lock of your hair falls in front of your face. Annoyed, you think to reach for it, but Ewan beats you to it, tucking it back in place.
"There you go, darling," he croons, gesturing for you to proceed in drinking.
"Th-thanks." His eyes don't leave yours as you take a slow sip.
"So," you say, desperate to break the silence, "which interview did you enjoy the most so far?"
"How can I possibly choose? I mean, I really liked the one with ComicSociety, the guy that said our characters have a lot of chemistry and should get together next season. He's right, I already told you!"
"Ohhh, sure, that will go down really well with the Blacks and Greens."
He smirks, "I don't see why not?"
"For one, Aemond is ensnared by Alys, and my character will never give up fighting for Rhaenyra. I just don't see it happening, Ewan."
"Right," he mutters thoughtfully, "there is still Alys in the picture."
"Still in the picture? With the amount of steamy scenes you two have lined up for season three, I'd say she will be Aemond's entire picture in and of herself."
"Hmm," he glances at you once, then looks down. Dare you think it, does he look disappointed?
"But hey," you add lightly, "maybe we can talk to Ryan and he can flip the entire script just for our characters."
"Yeah," his cheeky smile resurfaces, "maybe you can take Alys' place."
Take the place of Alys? Of Alys. Is he insinuating...
"Next round of interviews, guys!" The media manager announces to the room.
"Here we go again, darling," Ewan squeezes your hand once, before putting on his professional face once more.
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By the end of it all, not even caffeine can perk you up. You were exhausted, you and Ewan having finished four full hours of press.
Your assistant comes to your aid, ready to direct you back to your own hotel room.
"This has been such a pleasure, Ewan, really." You stand, this time initiating the hug.
He squeezes you gently, humming in your ear. When you pull apart, he says, "I honestly wouldn't mind trudging through hours and hours of press with you."
That's sweet of him. You're too tired to mask the warmth that rises to your cheeks. "And I feel the same. Today couldn't have gone any better."
"Truly, and listen, maybe we could - "
"Ewan!" The manager approaches. "I'm so sorry to rush with this, but we need to film just a quick soundbite with you for Aemond. Just two to three questions for the Max Tiktok account?"
"Oh, okay - " Ewan is reluctant to turn away from you.
"Perfect! If you could just stand there by the windows please..." The manager already has him by the arm, directing where he has to go.
"We have to go," your assistant says. "Still have to prep for tomorrow."
"I'll see you soon, Ewan!" you call out to him. "Thanks again."
He gives a half-hearted wave, dejected as he watches you walk out of the room.
"That wasn't too bad," you share with your assistant as you enter the elevators. "Not bad at all, actually."
"Oh, you did so well," she compliments. "It definitely helps with the press that you and Mr. Mitchell have such insane natural chemistry."
▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎
In the calm of your hotel room, you get ready for bed.
Just when you're about to finish with your nightly routine, your phone rings from your bedside table. You're quick to rush over, thinking it could be your assistant or your manager, with an urgent update about work.
But no - it's an unknown number. A UK number, as it appears.
Confused, you click answer anyway, putting it to your ear with a tentative, "Hello, who is this?"
"Hi, darling."
"Ewan?"
"Yeah, uhm, I hope I didn't disturb you - "
"Not at all," your answer comes out in a rushed breath.
"I also hope you don't mind that I got my assistant to ask your assistant to give me your number? It's what I wanted to ask you before you left today."
"Oh." You feel fully awake now, by some miracle, butterflies finding home in your stomach. "I don't mind. I... I should have given you my number, anyway. I have most of the cast's, in case I need to get a hold of you guys."
"Hmm, right," he says from the other end. You hear him calmly breathing, the sound strangely comforting, and wonder if he can hear the same from you.
He says, "I just wanted to keep hearing your voice. Didn't get enough of it today," and your heart just about stops.
"Oh. Okay," is all you are able to respond with.
"What are you doing?"
"Just... just getting ready for bed." Phone pressed to your ear, you shuffle around the room, putting some things back in place.
He says nothing for a few seconds, but you still hear his breathing, and some shuffling in the background. It occurs to you that he might just be as nervous as you are now.
Maybe.
"Listen," he finally says, "do you want to hear my pitch to Ryan about why our characters should get together next season?"
A genuine laugh escapes you. He sure is persistent. Playful, sure, but you're definitely willing to play along.
"Let's hear it."
"First," he says, "you have to renounce Daemon as your favourite character - "
"Not a chance."
" - and swear your love for Aemond."
"Keep dreaming."
He laughs, and you can only picture the corners of his eyes crinkling.
"Aww darling," he teases, "don't you love me?"
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The OGs will know that the final line is a nod to my first ever Aemond fic! 🖤
Did this slightly delay my series works? Yes, yes it did. Do I regret it? For Ewan frickin Mitchell, I would never ~
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matan4il · 3 days
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The other day, I went with my rl bff to the Jerusalem branch of the Museum of Tolerance for an exhibition on the Hamas massacre.
This is the sight that greeted us. "Esthers of the world, rise up!"
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It's a poster celebrating two women whose families had lived in Iran, one is Jewish, the other is Muslim, and both women ended up being murdered due to the Islamic regime of that country, even though the Jewish woman's family had escaped Iran and fled to Israel after the Islamic revolution. The face of each girl is actually a composite, made from many smaller pictures of her people who have lost their lives because of the Islamist regime of Iran.
I knew this right away, because I have shared a piece that was done about the poster and how it came to be almost 2 months ago. 
"You don't understand!" my bff (who works as a teacher) said, all emotional, "She," my friend points to the Jewish girl on the left side of the poster, Shirel Haim Pour, "is the cousin of one of my students."
There is zero distance in Israel between us and the Oct 7 atrocities. 
We go in and join the tour of the exhibition. The guide tells us it was built jointly with Malki Shem Tov, who is a well known name in Israel, if you work at a museum. Malki founded a "creative visual solutions" company with his brother Assaf, through which among other things, they helped build many Israeli exhibitions over the years. "His son..." the tour guide starts to say and I don't need more than that for something to click in my head. I know so many of the names, faces and stories of the hostages, and so Omer Shem Tov pops right away into my mind. I didn't make the connection before, but now I can only imagine what it meant for this father to work on an exhibition that recounts, among other stories, how his son was victimized and robbed of his freedom during this massacre.
There is zero distance in Israel between us and the Oct 7 atrocities. 
The opening wall has a huge time stamp, 6:29 in the morning. 
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The tour guide doesn't have to explain this number to Israelis, or why it's designed to look like an alarm clock display. We were all woken up on that fateful Saturday morning by the alarm clock of Hamas' rockets. And it doesn't matter what we thought or believed the day before, as the full scale and horror of the attack were starting to become known along Oct 7, we were all woken up.
There is zero distance in Israel between us and those atrocities. I know this, and still it strikes me, again and again.
There's an area dedicated to the pictures of one photographer who went to the south soon after the massacre. I knew some of them already, like the pic showing the bodies of 13 elderly Israelis, who were on their way to a tour of the Israeli south on that Saturday.
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Some are new, like the pic of the door handle in one bomb shelter. I stop for a second, because now that I've moved into my new place, it hits me that the bomb shelter door was made by the same company. Suddenly, I feel like I'm inside the picture in a reality where the terrorists took a slightly different route on Oct 7. The door was photographed from inside the bomb shelter, and the bullets that pierced it, they had to have hit the personal holding it shut. The handle has blood stains on it, and it's broken off. I can only imagine how many hours this person held, and how much force they had to use, for that to happen. I know one thing, even without knowing exactly who this bomb shelter belonged to... If this person was on their own, they would have probably ended up surrendering rather than keep fighting to hold on to the handle this desperately. This was likely someone trying to keep their family safe. 
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One note retrieved from the body of a terrorist is on display. It says everything about the motivation of the monsters who committed these atrocities, and every word is purely motivated by antisemitism and religious zeal. The note is actually not in Arabic, as it may first appear, it's in Farsi, the language spoken in Iran, hinting at the source, the Islamist regime there, which doesn't care about the liberation of anyone, it aspires to create a global network of fanatic terrorism.
The translation: "You must sharpen the blades of your swords and be pure in your intentions before Allah. Know that the enemy is a disease that has no cure, except beheading and uprooting the hearts and livers. Attack them!"
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There is a section dedicated to women's stories. The exhibition visitors spread out to watch the testimonies, each on a separate screen. It's a not like a forest, you can't really see it for the trees, and it's another moment of feeling overwhelmed because we can't truly get it. It's just not comprehensible, facing so many stories about intentional, face to face cruelty, brutality, sadism and joy in it. Mali Shoshana tells the story of how she tried to play dead while lying shot in a pool of her own blood, but her body wouldn't stop shaking, so she somehow turned on her side to the wall and knocked her injured knee against it, causing herself to pass out from the pain. It saved her life. Ricarda Louk tells the story of the last message they got from her daughter Shani, trusting she was right and there was nothing for them to worry about. Then Ricarda's son started screaming and crying, because he saw the same vid many of came across on that day, of his sister being dragged into Gaza stripped down, mutilated, abused, molested and humiliated, while Gazan civilians were celebrating the public degradation of her body. And there's more and more and more. "You can come back and continue to listen," the guide promises as he moves us to the next segment, but the truth is no matter how many stories I've listened to and absorbed, it still doesn't feel like enough.
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There is a wall with the head shots of the victims in Israel who lost their lives due to this war, whether they were murdered on Oct 7 or since, but it's only been updated up until Mar 27 of this year. Even so, no matter what angle I tried, I couldn't fit in all of the pictures.
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Interactive screens allow a geographic telling of the massacre's story. They show maps of Israel's south, with dots on them, red for the murdered, dark blue for hostages, bright blue for hostages who have been returned, grey for the injured. You can tap a dot and read a story. Or you can zoom out and try to comprehend how is it possible for there to be that many dots on the maps.
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"From darkness to light," reads the exhibition title. That's the perception of time in Judaism. We always move from darkness to light. And there's a section for the light, for stories of resilience, of bravery, of rehabilitation, of mutual support and caring. Filmed interviews that do their best to summarize an incomprehensible amount of good we've seen in response to an incomprehensible amount of evil. It features people from every demographic in Israel, and in that way also serves as a reminder of just how diverse we are as a society.
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This part, I think to myself, was included for visitors from abroad. We Israelis, we know.
There's one story I know already. Tomer Greenberg, an Israeli officer, rescued on Oct 7 baby twins from the carnage. He was later killed fighting in Gaza. Like a puzzle, I've heard this story from several angles, including from Tomer before he died. This movie features an interview I hadn't heard yet, with the volunteer paramedic that Tomer handed the twins to. Shalom, this medic, talks about how they clung to him desperately as they got to be fed and feel safe and cared for again for the first time in what's estimated to have been 14 hours. I'm sitting there, thinking of those babies crying, not understanding why their parents aren't coming to feed them, and I don't know how to deal with this.
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Shalom shares that the experiences of Oct 7 have inspired him to try and become a combative soldier, something that wasn't on the cards for him before that. I wonder again at people who can act like subjecting an entire (already traumatized) society to a sadistic massacre can liberate anyone.
And I understand Shalom fully. When your family is in the pits of hell, there's nowhere you want to be other than there, with them, doing what you can, rather than sit and watch helpless from afar. Most people would say he did a lot on that day. Shalom must have felt like that still wasn't enough.
At the very end, visitors are invited to add their own little piece of light, through neon notes and pens on which they'd share their thoughts. Nothing feels like it can sum everything I'm thinking and feeling up, but not writing anything feels worse, so my bff and I add a few of our words to the notes.
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I don't have any profound conclusions for this post anymore than I did for my note. I just know that this still hurts, that we're still losing people daily, that we can't begin to heal, because we're still in the middle of the wound being inflicted. But I also know that we WILL heal, that even if the wound can't be closed yet, our collective immune system kicked into action on Oct 7 already, that we will continue to share the pain and the comfort and the care, and this massacre and war will probably never stop hurting, that we'll never be the same, but eventually we will be alright. Where people choose to care, there's just no other option.
(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)
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paulic · 2 days
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Ok this is what I think the biopics will be like for each Beatle:
John will be so troubled but in a really charming way and Julian will be mentioned but briefly and they’ll make it seem like John was just too busy to be a present father (Paul will make up for it in a vomit inducingly cheesy way). His eating disorder, heroin addiction and other internal struggles (self-esteem, sexuality, maybe even gender,…) will go unmentioned or brushed over jokingly like haha he tossed Brian off, don’t we all at that age. He’ll be the cool and funny older brother & later genius who just couldn’t be confined within a band. They won’t have the guts to call his bullshit and therefore will automatically brush over his kinder and vulnerable sides. He’ll be reduced to a knock off version of the tortured artist blueprint. They’ll never pick up on his pathetic wet dog vibe
Paul will be the charming good guy who’s all in with the band. No mention of how he fucked over Jane and every other girl until Linda; he’ll be a musical genius, too, but in a prince of the people sort of way. They’ll loooove that he stopped eating meat, woke king!!!! Linda will be brushed over by making her into his soulmate wifey who finally helps the charming playboy with a heart of gold settle down. His depression and alcohol problem won’t be mentioned/reduced to feeling a little sad. He’ll be a little bossy sometimes but they won’t ever get it right how fucking annoying he could be. Straighter than a ruler. John’s brother, almost biologically. No homo. They’ll find a way to make the twink who fucked the entire population and had an ego bigger than Neptune into a straight feminist
George will be the indie underground smart Beatle and people on tik tok will start posting thirst traps of the actor with the caption “they don’t make em like this anymore” and then complain about real-George’s teeth. He’ll be so spiritual and smart and he won’t have an affair with his best friend’s wife at all and if he does it’ll be because of some spiritual insight, not because that man couldn’t keep it in his pants for 5 seconds. I’m deadly afraid of the colourful drug scenes where he’ll hallucinate god. He’ll be the perfect boyfriend and Pattie will be played by Sidney sweeney or something. They won’t take a side with the whole George Or Paul debate during the breakup, but George will be too focused on other things to want to stay in the Beatles. They won’t mention the three billion songs John&Paul deemed unworthy. They’ll never do the grudges my man held justice. No one could
Ringo will be the funny guy who luckily survived his childhood and found his passion through a kind nurse giving him his drumsticks. He’ll play an incredible drum solo at 8 years old on his hospital bed frame the first time he ever holds those sticks. He won’t be in gangs, he won’t beat his wife half to death, he won’t have drugs and alcohol problems. He’ll be peace and love from age 0. He’ll be slightly stupid and he’ll mention octopuses too much. They’ll never get it right how he was truly the eldest and how much his vote and opinion actually counted within the band and how much the boys wanted him in the band and admired him. He won’t be a sort of glue to the band. He won’t marry a teenager he met when she was 16 and he 22. He’ll be a weird version of Ken from the Barbie movie, his job will be Drum. They’ll flatten a severely nuanced and layered man to a sheet of paper with the word ‘beat’ on it
I am too afraid to even think about what they will do to Eppy
Oh and each and every one of them will have way too pretty teeth and I am already furious. I want them to have British men in the 1960s teeth. Give me British teeth and jerking off together
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⋆。°✩ DARLING, DON'T BE AFRAID
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Summary: Despite living with Xavier for the past few weeks, you still haven't taken the plunge to see if all this time together make you anything more than roommates especially when he disappears again in the middle of the night. Determined, you decide to question him on where his feelings lie. You just never thought a simple kiss on the cheek was the only push needed.
Pairing: Xavier x Fem!Reader
Content Warning: Roommates AU, Vanilla Smut (A lot of it. Like 7k words of smut), Love Confessions, Friends to Lovers, Emotional Sex
Word Count: 12,000~
Note: Sequel to Do Roommates Sleep Together. This part can be read as a standalone. So not necessary to read part one but it adds more context.
AO3 Link
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You make a final decisive pull of the trigger. A loud pang resonates in the air and smoke spirals off the barrel. The Wanderer disappears in a wisp of debris and dust that is quickly caught in the wind.
Xavier stands a few feet in front of you. His sword twirls with one final arc of light illuminating behind the sharpened tip before it dematerializes in his hand.  You’re oblivious to the way his eyes search and find you on instinct as you run eager fingertips on the warm barrel of your pistol. 
“Mission completed. We should report back.”
You raise your head to meet his gaze while your gloved fingers remain faithfully on your weapon. The adrenaline from a successful mission is still surging through you.
“I want to test out my guns some more.”
His eyes soften at your response, but the weight of his gaze is still heavy as he walks towards you and places his hand on your head. 
“There will be more Wanderers tomorrow,” he murmurs. His thumb gently brushes your forehead before his hand swoops back over your hair. Though your hands were still itching for another battle, your mind was weak to the calmness of his tone, like the slow tumble of waves on the shore, as he coaxes your head back to look at him more directly. “Let’s go home.”
This time you do not protest. Even if you did, what could you possibly say? 
Your aggression relaxes along with your shoulders, allowing you to give in to his request with a quick holstering of your twin guns. 
You return to headquarters and give your mission report to Jenna – pausing only to poke fun when she mentions how much Xavier’s reporting time has improved since the two of you became partners – then you start on the way home with the sun kissing at your back.
Laughter fills the air on the streets. Immediately, you feel warm inside. It was only thanks to the work you do every day that citizens could enjoy this peaceful dusk without fear of monsters scrambling to destroy the city like so many years ago. 
It’s rewarding to know you hold some small part in the safety of the city after almost dying in the catastrophe as a child. You breathed it in fully, letting joy fill your lungs as you savor the calm moment. The emotion is only highlighted by the fact that when you look to your side, you can see Xavier there, putting weight to the empty space left in the wake of your family’s death. 
Walking home together in the past was a random occurrence, happening whenever your busy schedules after missions aligned. As freshly cemented roommates, it was almost a given you’d walk home together now. Not just to the apartment complex, but to an actual shared home. 
This path you go along every day has become special in that time. It’s full of promises, the kind you could only wish for on snowy New Year's evenings as you tied red ribbons to the shrine gate and prayed for good things to happen in your life. Not a lot of those wishes came true but Xavier did. 
In that way, you were a fortunate person. 
It was only your guess if he felt the same. You want to ask him. Unlike when you’re fighting Wanderers, you’re not brave when it comes to Xavier - a part of you prefers to leave things between you unsaid. It’s safer that way as you can keep living in a beautiful world of your own illusions. 
Therefore, you’re unable to help yourself. Pinching the sleeve of his uniform, you tug on it gently to gain his attention; Xavier looks at you with glossy glazed eyes. He’s always so sluggish after missions. His steps slow and methodical, like a robot, as he barely manages to straighten his spine and raise his head.
“Chin up, Xavier. We’re almost there.”
“I’m exhausted,” he says. 
You don’t need to hear him say it to understand. You think you’ve become good at reading his body language by now. Donning a sympathetic smile, you shift your hand, aiming for a lower target, and entwine your fingers with his under the guise of leading him faster.
“My next solution is carrying you by the way.”
A smile cracks on his face, impossibly light as his gaze drifts to the hold you have on his hand. “I don’t think you could carry me.”
“You dare doubt me?” Truth be told, he was right. He was tall and muscular and much thicker under that uniform than he looked. He would probably crush you under his weight if you tried to lift him. Despite how improper it was to think, you wouldn’t mind if he wanted to place his weight on top of you in another way. You tick up the corner of your lips into a surprisingly innocent smile opposite of the images in your imagination as you flash your bicep to him. “I’m very strong.”
“I think it would make more sense if I carried you.”
“I can walk.”
“I don’t see why that matters,” he says with a yawn, and you smile.
“Are you sure you won’t drop me?”
“If it’s a choice between falling asleep and dropping you then I’ll definitely stay awake. Otherwise, you might end up carrying me after all,” he says. Xavier always manages to be unfailingly charming. Given the mystery of his past and the way he carries himself, you often question exactly what kind of upbringing he had. You almost ask but your interrogation doesn’t have the chance to plant seeds when he stops in front of you and kneels. 
You thought he was joking when he said he’d carry you home but that doesn’t stop you from wrapping your arms over his broad shoulders and letting him scoop your legs up around his solid waistline. 
His clasp on the back of your thighs makes you shiver. You feel like a touch-starved virgin that the simple strength of his hands over the thickness of your pants incited such a reaction out of you, so you bury your burning face against the back of his neck. 
“Are you alright?” he asks.
Xavier must feel your hair against his neck, and you use the fact he can’t see your face to your advantage as you nod against his nape.
“Just hungry.”
For his part, Xavier doesn’t question your sudden hunger. Instead, he asks what you’re in the mood for and starts to list the restaurants that you pass on the way to the apartment complex.
You lay your cheek against him, watching the many buildings pass you by until you point out one you don’t recognize, flashing with many signs about a grand opening.
“How about that one?” you ask.
Xavier chuckles, continuing on in his steps past the building in question. “It’s not that great.”
“How do you know?”
“I tried them out.”
You squeeze into his shoulders, pushing off of them in a childlike manner and an even more dramatic gasp. “Without me?”
“I was going to bring you something back, but they weren’t very tasty. I like your cooking a lot more.”
You know he can’t see you, but you puff out your cheeks anyway. You wrap your arms tightly around him again, willing your heart not to skip when his back tenses as your chest compresses against him.  
“Are you asking me to cook dinner for you? I’m quite exhausted after all that running around,” you tell him sarcastically. 
He accidentally makes you regret your teasing when he agrees with a compassionate offer, “I’ll cook for you today.”
Hearing the word cook from his mouth makes your stomach sour. If there’s one thing after all these months you learned, it’s that Xavier is a…creative cook to put it gently. Or rather, he has zero cooking ability if it involves electricity. You didn’t mind. The two of you make it work with you doing most of the cooking and him cleaning up after, at your own behest, because if he had his way, he’d be in the kitchen much more often. 
“On second thought, I’ll cook.”
“You still don’t trust me,” he says with a sigh. Guilt tingles through you. However, your continued survival outweighs the guilt that the memory of his puppy eyes can draw out of you. “I’ll handle the cold stuff, and I’ll leave the meat to you.”
“Deal,” you say, nuzzling your head against his neck. 
When you get home, the night pans out like it always does. The two of you take turns in the shower with dinner being cooked shortly after, and the human garbage disposal known as your roommate leaves very little work for you to do once all is said and done. 
You decide to start on the last of chores for today while Xavier washes the dishes. It’s routine to check the plants before going to bed as the many potted flowers were like your own children after you spent so many hours tending to them, finding the perfect ratio of nutrients and water to keep them thriving. 
It is also routine to hunt down the birds so lovingly named Fatso and Alarm Clock by the sleepy man of the house to give them some of the seeds and nuts you regularly brought home from the store. You told Xavier that happy birds would stop eating his strawberries when in reality you liked to spoil them. 
So, you spread out the seeds on the ground for them, leaving them there for later. 
“If you feed them, they’ll never leave.”
You can’t help the laugh that leaves you. As much as he complains about the birds, you think, if his constant curiosity about the birds’ day-to-day lives was anything to go by, that he’d miss the two fluffy creatures if they were to ever find new nesting grounds. You turn back to the balcony door with a cheeky grin. “I have experience with things that don’t leave after you feed them. You enjoyed dinner a little too much.”
It’s hard to see in the fading light but Xavier blushes and brings a shy grip to the back of his neck. “Last I checked you moved in with me.”
That silences you. There’s no denying his observation, and you fail to notice him getting closer until he reaches his hand out to help you up. You willingly reach out, hand sinking into his touch as he lifts you to your feet. 
The coolness of your palms touching slowly births a lingering warmth. The soft squeeze around your hand makes it hard to let him go but eventually you must. Otherwise, you might say things that are better kept to yourself as you walk back into the house and close the sliding door behind you. 
With a pounding heart, you retire to your room early.
This room is a little different from the master room at your old apartment. The wall color is a little different brighter and it’s smaller. Luckily, you made the space work pretty easily by migrating half your plushie collection into Xavier’s room, checking like a dutiful mother to make sure he was treating them right and placing them with love should they roll off his dresser.  Sighing, you change into slightly more comfortable clothes, choosing a random pair of soft shorts and a tank top to wear before climbing into bed. It’s ten when you finally let your eyes slip shut, and it's around eleven you feel someone touching you.
Your eyelids are surprisingly heavy; you can barely pry them open enough to see the wisp of grey-brown hair shadowing medium-blue eyes. You don’t protest as you feel his fingertips brush along your waist or when his knee digs into the mattress, sinking you towards his weight.
It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what he wants. You raise your arm enough to let your fingertips greet the curve of his chin in silent acceptance. Slowly, you drop your hand and squeeze his bicep. Like a good little soldier, he follows the order to fall into the bed with you. 
The most comfortable position is to slot your arm on top of his as he hugs your waist, props his leg on top of yours, and spoons your back. There’s absolutely zero space between your lower halves; and if he notices how you, with a small amount of shame, subtly shift and push yourself back on him a little more, he doesn’t say as he lolls his head against the curve of your neck while his incredibly light exhaling on your skin comforts you after a long day. 
With a flutter of your eyelids, you slowly slip back into sleep with the happiness that comes with being roommates with your crush. 
It’s times like these that make you think maybe he loves you. It’s also times like these that make you forget that despite all of the endearing things about him and despite how much you care about him, you don’t truly know a lot about him.
Xavier has always been a man with a lot of secrets. You’ve known this since you first met him asleep in the forest. It’s true that you once accepted the fact you’d never learn all his secrets but that was before whatever this abnormal relationship that the two of you found yourself in. 
Even after living together for more than two months now, you still had no idea where he would go when he would sneak off in the middle of the night. You didn’t question where he goes anymore, you found that he wouldn’t give you a straight answer to save his life. You merely stayed up until you heard the sound of the door opening or the warped echo of air being sucked into a vacuum, indicating he teleported inside. 
So, when you wake up at two in the morning, finding yourself alone and the side of the bed where he laid mere hours ago already cold, you’re not surprised.
Getting out of bed, you slip on your slippers and drag your feet to the balcony. It’s a familiar situation when you collapse into the swing chair, with nothing but the cold and the chirping of the birds to keep you company until he undoubtedly returns with his body hosting a family of fresh wounds.
It’s incredibly frustrating because you love him and seeing him hurt, without you having been there to prevent it, drives you crazy. You wonder why he won’t tell you, and your heart sinks, as quickly as a stone cast in a lake, with the idea that maybe you were the only one thinking that your relationship meant more than it did. Because even after all this time, you still aren’t close to him in the way you want. 
Clenching your fists, you shove your eyes against them. It was all so infuriating when he ran off to fight Wanderers or whoever and left you all alone to overthink and worry about him like some helpless house plant. It was enough to make you want to cry as the strange foreboding sense of losing him begins to echo inside of you, making you nauseous.                                                                                 There’s only one way to get rid of this feeling. Taking in a deep breath, you settle to give him a piece of your mind about sneaking off so much and also to bite the bullet to confess your feelings. 
It was only a matter of waiting for him to actually return home and to get your heightened nerves to stop firing in every direction in the meantime. 
By the time you heard the door to the apartment creaking open, you’d nearly fallen asleep in the wicker swing chair. You swallow down the bitter taste of fear, ignoring the tumultuous waves it makes when it hits your stomach. You’d never get anywhere if you didn’t face him. 
Carefully, you hop up from your seat and make slow strides into the apartment. It’s still dark in the house; you hadn’t bothered to turn on the lights earlier. Yet Xavier carries a lightness around him, mostly imagined by yourself, that makes him easy to spot in the darkness. 
For a moment, things seem normal as he takes a few stiff steps forward. Suddenly, he falls forward, the white of his uniform nearly a blur with how fast he collapses onto the sofa, but it is nothing compared to the speed at which you rush to his side. 
You call his name, press two fingers to his throat, and let your eyes slip closed with a desperate concentration as you search for his pulse behind the blaring red of his collar. 
It’s a gradual pace, averaging twenty beats a minute and slowly rising. For anyone else, you’d immediately rush them to the hospital. For Xavier, that number is a relief. 
You hold your hand to your pounding heart, practicing deep measured inhales to calm it. It appears he fell asleep as soon as he entered the room, with only enough awareness to kick off his shoes at the door. 
It looks like your lecture will have to be postponed for another day. 
You’re thankful for all the training you had to take to become a hunter because it takes an enormous amount of effort to throw one of his arms over your shoulders and drag him to his bedroom. You make a mental note to never let him question your ability to carry him again as you sit him on the bed and shuffle off his uniform jacket, leaving him only in his pants. 
In a tender motion, you gently cup his face and examine him. Dirt cakes his face; and when you brush it away, there’s a small cut on his cheek. It hits you again just how reckless and secretive he can be, echoing with a bitter thought that he didn’t bring you again. The only bright spot is the little cut is his only injury this time. 
Laying him on his back, you leave for only a moment to get a warm washcloth and an adhesive from the bathroom. It’s a blue band-aid with a cartoonish pink bunny on it, something a kid would love and has probably been collecting dust in the drawer longer than you’ve been alive. 
It takes all the seriousness out of your body when you return, clean his face off, and place the colorful bandage on his cheek. It’s hard to believe this narcoleptic pretty boy was the strongest member of the Hunters Association. 
“I didn’t think when we moved in together I was going to become a babysitter,” you commented with a little huff and poke of his cheek. “You’re terrible at taking care of yourself. Can’t cook. Can’t stay awake. Can’t tell someone when you’re going out. I bet you didn’t even lock the door when you came in. …What if a Wanderer floated in after you and trampled all the flowers, or did you just not want to leave any for me tomorrow?”
You know your complaints are falling on deaf ears as he cuddles up to his pillow without a care in the world. But if you didn’t complain, you’d get depressed instead. Dropping to your knees, you sit on the floor and prop your elbow on the bed to get a better look at him. 
He looks so peaceful.
There’s no tension, no crease to his expression. It’d be easy to mistake him for a normal young man if it weren’t for the strong humming of his Evol tickling at the wall of your resonance.
“I’ll let you sleep, but you’re getting it in the morning! I expect answers. Otherwise, I won’t cook breakfast for you,” you attempt to sound threatening in your words with every poke to his cheek a not-so-silent promise to follow through. “I’ll take my missions with the new recruit all the ladies at work gossip about. And the next time I get a snack shipment, I’m letting Jeremiah have first pick!”
With one last prod to his face and no reaction otherwise, you stop your demands and sit back on your legs. 
Bit by bit, you feel your energy dissolving. It’s no use. It’s all empty threats. You’ll probably not cook for a few days, eat in front of him too, at least until he gives you those puppy eyes, and you’ll fold just like origami paper. You’ll still save him the snack you know he likes even if you allow Jeremiah first pick of the rest. And you’d never be interested in the new recruit or anyone else. 
Xavier can be distant and formal. For others, his hyper-independence was evident. Taking on missions alone and avoiding group settings is just the way Xavier’s personality works. He’s reliable and gets along with everyone at a surface level and he’s known to go out of his way to help others without seeking validation for it so it never ruffled any feathers when he goes off on his own or rejects an invitation to drink with the others after work. 
They didn’t see. They didn’t see how easy it was to care about him. They appreciate him but they weren’t aware of how intensely and passionately he could feel when he unfurls that independent nature. How he always quietly adjusts his dominant foot to point your direction whenever a Wanderer appears. How his voice drops and his touch becomes the smallest bit more graceful and careful when he sees you upset. How sweetly he looks when he sleeps.
It makes your resolve crumble and your heart squeeze, something only he can do without even being awake to know it. 
“You’re lucky I like you,” you mumble to him. 
As you lean closer, you easily ignore the stirring in your gut that tells you to stop. 
The bandage is a little rough against your lips as you seize the chance to kiss him. It’s a short and small thing, much more delicate than your prodding from earlier because you want to indulge the romantic in you. You want him to somehow sense the feelings cultivated in your heart over the past few months though impossible when he’s asleep.
You don’t let it last long. Instead, the desperate urge to feel his heat against you spurs you to rest your forehead against his cheek. It’s warm and soft, and the faint scent of pine trees of the no-hunt zone fills your nose. You savor being this close to him, allowing yourself to indulge in it until the heat on your skin starts to match his, and you finally let him have peace for the night.
With no need to remain in his room, you stand and pivot towards the door, wondering how you’ll manage to grasp any form of sleep tonight. However, you don’t make it two steps before there’s a tug at your arm.
You yelp as you’re pulled towards the bed while the shock has you stumbling forward into it. The hand leaving your arm in favor of grasping around your wrist stops you from falling completely but your knees have already buckled. You’re left nearly a head under him when he finally swings his legs over the side of the bed and shifts into a full sitting position. This position is oddly familiar. When you uncertainly force your eyes up to meet his face, this vulnerable angle becomes unmistakable.  
His voice is husked and rasped from sleep, sending a chill up your spine when paired with the swirling shadows darkening his blue eyes under his hooded lids and dark lashes. That’s the look of a predator, of the association’s strongest hunter, and you face the inkling realization that you’re the prey. 
Nervously, you begin to divert your eyes. He takes a page out of your own playbook and reaches under your chin to guide your sight back to him as you fight not to whimper at the pressure of his thumb pushing down as if he wants to part your lips. It isn’t until now that you notice how close you are to his lap and how another few inches would drop you to your knees.
“Why worry about Wanderers following me home when you’re so much scarier.”
“What do you mean?” 
Memory has never been your friend. This though is the first time you’ve forgotten how to breathe when his fingers completely close around your wrist. His hold is firm, preventing you from wringing your way out of his grasp, but it doesn’t hurt.
He might as well take that grasp and use it to squeeze your heart instead when he brings your hand to his face. You’re unsure what he’s planning; the awkwardness of the situation makes your fingers straighten and twitch away as he holds your hand closer to his face. Sensing your trepidation, he closes the last of the distance instead by tilting his head into your hand with the same affection as always as he lets your fingertip brush against the silly little bunny bandage. 
The familiarity of the motion puts your heart a little more at ease but not enough to bring your breathing back to you as he mumbles, “I don’t remember giving you permission to kiss me.”
Your lips part with a silent puff while your brows push forward, highlighting the confusion in your mind onto your face. He takes advantage of the moment to nuzzle your hand. It’s a notion you can’t appreciate as his words finally sink into your mind and reform into a horrifying conclusion.
“…You were awake the whole time.”
He chuckles so easily at the dry peep that echoes from you, the rivet of that warm sound collects in your palm and makes your face scalding hot. You didn’t face a burning heat like this even when fighting one of those flame dragons. All the while, Xavier was laughing at you…
“Not the whole time.”
With your head catching up, you find enough of yourself again to actually glare at him and smack his shoulder. “That’s not the point!”
With another display of strength, he locks your other wrist, pulls you up, and then snatches you into him. Luckily, you’re able to flatten your palms against his chest to brace yourself. His heart as well as his face is unnervingly calm compared to your own organ that’s currently orchestrating its escape from your chest, battering your ribcage even harder as you unconsciously stretch your fingers over his naked skin. 
You don’t like this. This bullying, which you only describe as such because you can’t think of a word more fitting for the way he’s treating you, is too one-sided. 
“It was on the cheek,” you argue with a steeled voice. You fake the confidence to stare him back down, choosing to trade your determination to confess to him tonight in exchange for preserving your pride. “It was friendly.”
To your satisfaction, your declaration of war makes him the one to pause this time. His eyes widen and there’s a quiver in those waves of blue that he hides by glancing down and away. 
“…Is that what it was?”
You nod. “I wasn’t…going to do anything else.”
Xavier smiles, shaking his head, and there’s a new determination in his eyes that causes your teeth to clench down on the inside of your cheek as he leans closer. 
“In that case, is it okay to return the favor?”
He doesn’t give you the time to answer. He’s already closing the distance, his dark lashes already fluttering, and his lips already puckering to kiss you as you’re squeezed flushed against him, only your palms stopping your chest from colliding with his. 
“Wait!”
Hearing your disapproval, he pauses, but that cheeky grin still doesn’t dissipate. 
“What's wrong?” he asks with a sigh. You’re sure it’s not a true question. “Am I not allowed to give you a friendly kiss as well.”
The implications make your stomach twist while your thighs squeeze together pathetically with the sudden throbbing of arousal that spikes through you as you tumble further and further into this rabbit’s trap.
“I—that’s!”
“So, you were misbehaving,” he concludes from your sheepishness. “I guess that means I need to punish you instead.” He breaks his hold around one of your wrists to ghost his fingertips along your cheek and down your neck until all you can do in response is breathe out a moan, much to his surprise given by the rise of his eyebrows and the slight dust of pink on his bewildered face. “…I didn’t think you were that sensitive there.”
Your mind swims with the traitorous thought of wanting to show him where you’re more sensitive dancing in your mind before you can sweep it away. When his fingers dance along your neck again, you whimper and hold in another moan.
“Don’t hold back on my account. You know my most sensitive spot after all, as hunting partners, it only makes sense for me to know yours, right?”
You can hardly think of a response to that. It’s true. You know his biggest weaknesses and as you come to terms with the situation you run your thumb over the plump inside of your thigh hesitantly. It takes you almost an entire minute to decide on what you want to say, and you don’t notice his hold on your wrist weakening.  
“My weakness—” 
Suddenly, your arm drops back to your side.
“I’m kidding,” Xavier states; the small smile he normally wears comes back to his face as you look up at him with wide eyes. “I was only curious as to what your reaction would be.”
The tension in the air wanes and buries itself in your heart. The embarrassment clings to every cell living in you, unshakeable as you try to keep a brave face. “You’re cruel.”
“Am I? You were the one touching me, all the while promising to run off with some rookie,” he reminds you. 
“I wouldn’t have to if you didn’t—you’re so frustrating,” you scream at him, and this is the first time he appears to take you seriously all night.
“I’m sorry,” he breathes out, with less teasing and more concern. He wraps an arm around your waist. His legs slot between yours, leaving your knees to collide with the plush of the bed as he hugs you tighter and tighter until you’re nearly seated in his lap. “Don’t be mad. I only thought—” 
“Xavier?”
“Did you really mean it then?” he redirects. He snakes his other arm around your waist, this time when he holds you it feels…weak, and his pursed lips and narrowed eyes hold back a troubled emotion. “That it was in a friendly way?”
Your breath hitches at the swirl of his thumbs nervously circling the small of your waist. Nervously, he waits for an answer you long lost in the rapids of the constantly changing tides of the last few minutes. 
“If you meant it…if you truly wanted to kiss me,” he pauses, trying to find his voice. The one to tell you that you’re all he thinks about. “Then you should have woken me up.” His face holds a serene glow that completely enraptures you as he looks up at you. “I wouldn’t have rejected you,” he swore.
He loved you so much it ached. Moving in together should have been enough to prove it. He guesses not; because when he thinks you want him back, you’re so hesitant to accept. Even now, you’re unable to respond. 
This cycle has become painful, even for someone as patient as himself, the wait when you’re this close to him is agonizing. So, he decides now to be the one to end this circle the two of you found yourself in with one decisive motion. 
He tests the waters, not knowing if he’ll swim or drown, but he has confidence in his ability to read your personality and actions as he cups the back of your head and pulls you in for a kiss. 
Your mind empties immediately, your body on autopilot when it registers the warm, silky skin of his lips on yours. Closing your eyes, you willingly tumble and fall into the taste of him, chasing after it when he breaks away. 
“There. We’re even,” he says, but to you, that’s far from the truth. You’re far from even after all the heartache and sleepless nights he’s been putting you through, after all the push and pull that left you aching and wanting both in your heart and between your thighs. 
The self-satisfied smile on his face quickly fades as you grope his shoulders, digging your nails in like you’re afraid he’ll escape. Your knees press to the top of the bed as you plant yourself more onto his lap. He braces his hands on your hips to catch you as you run your hand into his hair and crane his head back, so he has to look you in the eye.
His ears pinken at your sudden brazenness, but it doesn’t reflect in his voice as he smiles at you. “Are you trying to get more?” 
“Am I being too greedy?” you ask. He chuckles at the jut of your lips and the pleading eyes before you press another demanding kiss to the corner of his lips. 
Xavier moans from his throat as he latches onto your jaw to redirect your kisses to his lips. Kissing him is nearly maddening, the twitch of his muscular thighs under your ass making your mind hazy. With one hard squeeze at your hips, he catches up to the zealousness of your kisses. 
His tongue pokes and prods at your mouth. However, he doesn’t need much permission to keep going as you open your mouth wider. His mind skips and lags at just how quickly your mouth overtakes the slick appendage. It leaves him more than a little out of breath and flustered with the rate your mouths keep parting and meeting, tongues desperately searching and licking the inside your mouths as if this is the first meal you’ve had in weeks.
You’re hungry to memorize each other despite having all the time in the world now to do just that. When the two of you finally indulged enough and earned enough satisfaction, you’re able to calm down and readjust the pace. 
“I think we’re both greedy,” he jokes about the both of you before sliding his tongue back into your mouth. This time he’s slower as he presses down on your tongue, causing your teeth to lightly graze over the top of his.
There are too many sensations going on for you to keep up. The way your breasts hug his hard chest has you feeling sensitive while the heat seeping from his tongue stroking in your mouth has your stomach bundled in tight knots that won’t know release until he’s inside of you. 
Dreams were nothing compared to this. Nights filled with nothing but inappropriate thoughts of him turn into nightmares at the slim chance of having to face them again should this go wrong. 
Impatiently, his fingers curve into the hump of your ass to anchor you and encourage you to grind on his lap, or rather grind against the hard tent brazenly making its presence known with each hurried roll of your hips.
You whine from the separation of your sexes when he begins to lift you up, but your complaints quickly die in your throat. They’re replaced by a squeal as he flips you and your back bounces on the mattress.  
Xavier climbs over you, his face flushed, breath ragged, and overall, he’s just absolutely beautiful to you. Reaching up, you cup his cheek and play with the ends of his hair, unable to recall the last time you’ve felt this high. 
“Xavier,” you whisper breathlessly as you swoop his bangs back to see more of his handsome face and save it to memory. “What are we?”
Xavier tilts his head, furrowing his brow at your question, and there’s a second where a ray of doubt breaks through the clouds of lust in his irises. “We’re…whatever you want to be.”
“I want to be with you,” you say. Those words tumble out more effortlessly than you ever thought. 
Xavier overlaps your hand with his, holding on tight as if to prove a point. “You are with me.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I don’t,” he corrects. Then, he dazzles you as he always does, “I want you to tell me so there’s no mistake, and you can’t take it back later.”
You inwardly become embarrassed when it crosses your mind that this is the first time you’ve ever confessed to him without multiple drinks in your system. It’s too late to turn back now that you’ve crossed the Milky Way and landed on the other side. 
But why would you when you’re so close?
“I want to be with you always. Whenever and wherever you are. Whether that’s having fun together or fighting. I-I love you, and—”
“And I love you,” he answers. You’re not sure if you’re jealous or relieved that he can say those three words without hesitation.
“I don’t want anything to be between us. I don’t want any more secrets or hidden things. I’m tired of this. I just want to be real, more than partners or roommates or whatever other title that isn’t boyfriend and girlfriend.”
“Okay,” Xavier agrees as easily as he agreed to be roommates with you in the first place. 
“Okay?”
“I want that too,” he agrees as he repositions himself on top of you and his lips curve into a small smirk, “girlfriend.”
You’re accustomed to the finicky organ known as your heart tightening with pain when you’re overwhelmed; this time when it skips a beat, it’s welcomed. Smiling, you gaze up at him as he releases a slow, strained breath. It’s validating to know he’s been just as nervous as you.
Everything suddenly becomes full force again when his knees move to either side of your legs while he pins your hands above your head in one tight fist. His teeth nip at your earlobe, and his free hand gropes at your breast, fingers outstretching to fully take it in his grasp. Wet kisses burn on your throat, each one firing off a rapid signal to arch your back. 
“Slow down,” you whine before cutting it off with a moan as he hits a particular delicate spot. The discovery spurs him on, like a pet with a new toy, and he bites your nape once again causing your hips to jerk. With a burning desire building in your stomach at every touch, you pitifully hug your thighs together to try to ease it. “I didn’t get a chance to absorb all that,” you tell him, mostly to get some time to catch up. It backfires wonderfully as he grips onto the bottom of your tank top.
“I have a better way to help you understand.”
The sheets shift with his movement, your lower half dipping towards him as if he holds his own gravitational field. He settles between your legs and strokes against you with one slow, languid rock. It instantly makes you throb. It’s painful how hard you clench over absolutely nothing, panties gathering the lust that’s dripping from you.  
You simultaneously hate and love him for causing this need that’s bubbling inside you. 
Large hands press your shirt further up your torso. “Arms up,” he demands softly, which you have no problem obeying, and he quickly lifts your shirt over your head.
He lowers his hands to hold at your waist, and they fall still on you as he takes in your naked skin. You’re not privy to his thoughts. The silence of the room feels defean-ing now that your needy gasps of air aren’t filling it.
He pauses, eyes taking you in as you raise your eyebrows at his hesitancy. Xavier smiles, mumbling out, “Just thinking where to start.”
Xavier smiles at you so tenderly. Everything about him is incredibly soft on first appearance. He has big blue puppy eyes, he prefers white, cozy clothes, and his voice is just as gentle as his appearance. Everything about him is soft except for his hands. 
Those are hardy and battle-honed, worn with calluses built up with every swing of the sword he’s taken since he was a child, enough of them to slay thousands of Wanderers over the years. 
They drag.
Oh, they drag so dangerously slow over your skin, dipping into the pudge of your stomach and highlighting a small circle in the warm, buzzing glow of his Evol. The rays shine gold over your flesh, shimmering brightly in the dark of the room. 
“Here,” he states before hunting down another spot on your torso. A beauty mark, like a beacon, earns the sharp eyes of a hunter. He zones in on the vulnerable location, creating a golden target. “Maybe here.”
You squirm with every mapped spot he creates. “Xavier.”
The residue of his power leaves your skin humming; you’re overly aware of each spot he highlights with his power. You like to think your senses would still be heightened regardless of this little game. After all, you’ve been wanting him to touch you forever.
Every night next to him felt like torture, being unable to touch him more than a hug when all you could feel on your back was his hard chest, his arm tight around your waist, and the outline of his cock against your ass as he sighed in your ear.
It runs through your head that he must have put more thought into touching you than you assumed as he continues to stripe lines over the top of your thighs right under your night shorts, making your breath heavy in your throat. You’re no longer sure if he’s marking you to tease you, to track what parts of your body he’s claimed for himself, or to simply make you laugh from the humming of his Evol tickling you like fuzzy static on an old tv screen. Even as he smiles at your shallow giggles, there’s no denying the aura of possession radiating from him that makes you antsy when he finally presses his finger to your sternum.
“Let’s start here,” he says followed by a soft hum as he tattoos a line straight between your breasts, leaving you highlighted in slowly fading graffiti.
“About time you decided,” you say with an playfully exaggerated roll of your eyes. He cocks his head at you with a sly smile.
“I can’t help if I want to touch all of you,” he murmurs. Any response you had ready dies when he licks the encircled zone of your shoulder then swiftly to the notch of your throat, drawing a moan out of you that you didn’t think you were capable of until you met him.
Tilting your head, you allow him more room to work as he kisses your chest. His warm tongue slips through the line he marked, his nose dragging against you as he litters your engorged skin with kisses. 
“More,” you beg. Who was he to keep you waiting any longer?
He slips a fingerpad over the tip of your nipple, gently pressing down and then rolling it. It does nothing to satiate you. Satisfaction keeps escaping your grasp, the goalpost of what’s enough moving further out of reach with every pinch and pull of your pebbling nipples. Chasing it makes you brash, and you give a hard push to the back of his head. 
Just as you want, he spoils you. He bites and nips the supple skin, drawing out soft pleas from your angelic lips. When he finally graces you with the slick, velvety lap of his tongue on your pert nipple, you mewl and arch. His lips are a little rough after being out all night, his hunger for you more palpable than ever as he gropes harder and sucks at your wet skin. 
Your aching pussy throbs with every brush of his clothed cock. Your patience drains more and more as you crave something to fill you. It isn’t until he switches sides and gently nips and suckles around your other teat that you realize he’s been fingerprinting you with his Evol, the polka dots slowly fade away each time he adjusts his hand to knead your breast.  
“You’re still being cruel,” you manage between moans. 
“I think I’m being very fair,” he reasons, recapturing your lips to silence your complaints, and it works as your mind keeps repeating when his tongue makes a temporary reservation back in the confines of your mouth. 
When he parts with you again, he cements it with a soft kiss then another. He keeps peppering them on you so fast that you almost miss the way his tongue darts over your bottom lip before his teeth bite down. 
Xavier sighs between his kisses, each one adding more pressure, turning from loving, adoration-filled into needy, heavy smooches.
“Wanted.”
Another kiss that leaves you whimpering.
“To.”
He fondles your chest again, alternating between rolling and pinching your sensitive, puffed nipple then grasping your bare tits in his hands, molding and kneading them.
“With you.”
With your thighs closing at his waist, you curve your back and meet the sloppy buck of his hips. There’s a rush of excitement leaking from you when his kisses trail back over your breasts, hitting the tiny ring of bite marks he seared on you before tracing across the targets of light decorating your belly. 
“So bad.”
Skin on fire, legs spread wide to accommodate his chest as he sinks lower to press wet kisses to your stomach, you call out to him. “Xavier, baby,” you whisper and brush his hair to get his attention. And does he give it to you when his eyes flick up to look at you from under the grey tuffs of his hair.
Your mouth goes dry at the sight. 
You bring your finger to your lips, not only to pry them open so you can speak but also because you need to bite on it. Otherwise, the surge of lust in you at the sight of his head so close to your cunt and the back of your thighs resting on his broad shoulders would cause you to cum right there. 
“My most sensitive spot…is my legs…”
It doesn’t take long for him to catch on, and he quirks his eyebrows up at you with false concern. He lowers his head to kiss your stomach again, this time noticeably closer to your mound. “Are you sure you want to tell me that in this situation? It isn’t wise for the prey to put themselves at a disadvantage.”
“I said no secrets,” you remind him, curling a finger to beckon him back up. Inwardly, you curse that he decides to bring your legs with him by keeping them propped up on his shoulders. Somehow, you manage to ignore his obvious teasing and poke at the cutesy adhesive still stuck on his face. “If you were listening, you should know you’re still in trouble for sneaking off so much without telling me.”
“It wasn’t on purpose,” he tells you, a layer of remorse riding his explanation. “I wasn’t expecting to go anywhere.”
Amused, you shake your head at how boyish he sounds as he defends himself while he pulls off that wide and pleading look to bolster his cause. Even with your amusement, you’re not willing to let him off just yet. Sternly, you tap his cheek again. 
“That’s not going to work this time.”
Pouting, Xavier holds onto your hand, stopping your playful jabs. “Please give me a chance to lighten my sentence, Miss Hunter, it was unintentional,” he negotiates with a kiss on your palm. The sincerity in his request eases your heart enough to allow him a little wiggle room, or perhaps it’s the slick trailing more between your folds. 
“You only got until morning to make a case for yourself.”
“I’ll make you forget by then.” He snatches up your ankle towards his face, a much more pleasant position than your last, as your muscles were starting to ache from having your knees pushed to your face. 
He caresses your ankle, pressing an airy kiss. The little bump of his nose against the ball of your ankle tickles, making a giggle cascade from your lips as you slide lower with the pull of your leg.  
“Silly,” he mumbles before shuffling off your shorts. Your underwear comes off with more of a fight, the stickiness soaked into it causing the dainty fabric to cling lewdly to your skin and outline to the shape of your cunt. 
You don’t often hear Xavier curse but that’s what happens along with his tongue rolling over his upper lip when he catches the image. He reaches out and his fingers twitch, threatening to curve against the spreading stain in your panties but he resists and hooks his fingers into the waistband. He takes his sweet time watching the doused material peeling from you with thin strands of cum sticking to it.
It takes him more effort than he’d like to admit to resist diving straight in. Instead, he keeps it slow, sensual, as much for his sake as yours as he skims his lips up your calf.
He does the same with your center, carefully pressing two fingers against you as he holds your leg up on his shoulder. His mouth stays on your inner thigh, but his eyes are entirely locked on his fingers and the way they effortlessly collect your cum and slip between your lips with barely a push. You can feel his breath shudder out against you before he forces it down with a bite of your thigh but that does nothing to hide the way his entire body tenses when his fingers slip from your clit all the way to your clenching hole. 
It does nothing good for your ego or your sanity to think how normally calm and collected Xavier is losing his composure just by touching you. How he’s so obviously turned on when you haven’t nearly returned as much as he’s been giving you. 
He presses his hands at the crook of your thighs, pushing your legs further apart, and quenches himself between your legs. His name leaves you in one low drawn-out sigh. Sure, you were baiting him when you told him your weakness, but you weren’t expecting him to abuse the knowledge so readily. 
He held your legs blood cuttingly tight to keep you from squirming away from his wriggling tongue, and by the moan that reverberates from his chest and the strong jerk against the mattress when your juices hit his tongue, you think he would only be satisfied if you crushed his head between your straining thighs. When he suckles your clit; when his voice, muffled, hits your pussy; when his biceps tighten around your legs as if encouraging you to do so, and when his eyes meet yours with a silent demand, you know that’s exactly what he wants.
At the plunging of his fingers in you, you break down, catch his head in a vice-like grip, and push him into you. Your heart flutters and the remaining butterflies in your stomach migrate away at the growl he lets out. Your walls happily clench around those thick fingers, your dripping hole making it easy and smooth work to pump in and out of you. You’re not sure when he decides he would rather feel your muscle tightening around his tongue instead, but you can only respond with the tilt of your head back into the sheets and the stroke of your heel on his bare back when it happens. 
The only thing better is his palm grinding down on your clit, alternating between slow rotations and rough sporadic grinding that has your toes curling and your eyes glossing with the buildup of tears.
“You’re too loud,” he comments yet he doesn’t stop, in fact, he presses down harder, making you whine. “You’re going to wake the neighbors.”
“Since when have you cared what the neighbors think?” you barely manage to whimper out. 
“I’m not worried about them. I just don’t want anyone else to hear what only I should,” he remarks, lapping up the juices spilling down your legs.
His confession is a surprise to you. You never took him to be so possessive. But if that possessiveness is what kept his tongue swirling on your swollen clit and an intense moan escaping your lips then you didn’t mind. 
However…
His fingers weren’t enough anymore. 
Choosing to surprise him, you decide to turn the tables on him. You jerk your legs, catching him off guard but not enough to tip him over. He looks at you with concern. It doesn’t stop you from trying again with extra force this time until you can weaken his grasp and force him down on his back. 
Having the world’s strongest hunter under you was only something you could dream of—first as a rival and now as a lover. The adrenaline has you tunnel-visioned as you straddle his stomach, your soaked cunt making a waterboard out of his abs, which Xavier has also picked up on if the dusky pink on his cheeks is anything to go by.
You grab his hands, gripping tight to regain his attention. Xavier looks taken back especially when your fingers interlock his and pin them back. Whether he’s shocked or curious you don’t know, and you also don’t ask to borrow his power. 
“You’ve been having too much fun,” you tell him as you check to make sure your finger is sufficiently coated with light. “For my turn, I’ll attack here and here,” you whisper, marking off his chest and drawing a line across his neck.
There’s a hint of worry finally when he sees you’re aiming for his weak spot. “If you’re trying to teach me the best spot to kill Wanderers, I already know.”
“More like the best spots to defeat a Xavier,” you remark, flattening your palm over his heart, finding your own thumping when you verify that you finally managed to raise his heart rate to the levels of a normal human.
“You’re pretty forward today.” Xavier reaches out to hold your hips and cocks his head at you with an inquisitive glance. “Are you always this easy to excite or is it because of me?” 
You feel your face heat at his question. As if he didn’t already know the answer. No one else could make you like this. Needy. Shy. Aroused. Flustered. Confused. Infatuated and in love more than you’ve ever been. 
Your eyes soften. “And if I said it was you?”
“Then, you can use me all you want,” he confesses and gently coaxes you back to sit on his hard cock. You smoothly slide your hands to his shoulders, rotating loving strokes into his fair skin before you stop to free his cock from his pants.
It springs readily into your palm, so responsive. You reward him by letting him have a little taste of you. He tries to hide the hitch of his breath as if he could hide any reaction from you right now. It’s so hard to get him to react to anything, and your brain won’t let you miss a single moment as you sit back onto his lap and grind.
His cock slides between your lips, so big that you can feel it stroking you fully, his swollen, dribbling head making you whimper whenever it bumps your clit. 
“You, you’re so—” he begins, his eyes flitting from the gentle shake of your tits to his cock glistening between your folds, but he loses his voice to a low whimper when you increase your pace. It’s not on purpose but you can’t help yourself; you’re aching for him just as much as he is for you. “Hah, please...” 
His cock is leaking onto him with each sleek thrust, a little pool of precum glistening on his belly as your hips buck. It makes your stomach twist and your insides twitch to see him so excited for you.
“Not yet,” you tell him, brushing fingers across the length of his throat. His mouth parts with a croak that plasters a crooked smile on your face.
His eyebrows knit, and he frowns as you decide to tease him a little by slowing your strokes while your nails continue to follow the thick vein protruding from his neck as he desperately holds down his whines. 
“And you call me the cruel one.”
He was gorgeous under you. Beautifully flushed and sheened with sweat. His lips were so close to quivering each time his swollen head was swallowed back under your heat. It’s strange how his pitiful expression actually excites you, leaving you wetter and funneling this cycle of him repeatedly scrunching his face before relaxing it with a moan. 
“Please,” he asks again, this time more politely, pleadingly, and downright cutely. He knows what he’s doing because you decide to take pity on him when he gazes at you. “Please let me have you?”
It takes only a second for you to reposition yourself and hover over him. There’s a split hesitation when it registers that you’re actually going to have sex with him and how large he actually is with his cock standing tall and the tip kissing at your entrance.  You press downward anyway.
The stretch is both painful and pleasurable, straining your nerves as you lower. The wince on your face is accompanied by a hiss on your lips. However, Xavier is there again to catch you.
“Let’s take our time,” he instructs.
You nod, slowly thrusting halfway onto him. Each rise and fall of your hips coating him with your cream little by little makes it a bit easier to sheath him each bounce. 
“Good girl,” he whispers soothingly. Face constricting, he bites down on his lip to hold in a weak groan. It’s not your fault that the praise made your walls flutter and tighten.
When you finally suck him in completely, your eyes roll. 
“There you go,” he continues. He slides his hand into one of yours, encouraging you to hold onto it as you slowly and pointedly follow the curve of his cock, “Just like that,” he rasps out.    As you take him in fully, your pussy reaching his lap and pushing against his balls, you find it hard to concentrate on the exact words leaving him.
You take a minute to sit with him fully sheathed inside of you, allowing your stretched core to get more accustomed to his cock and also for the high of joining with him to cool off. Otherwise, you’d lose control.
You feel so full. It’s a wonderful sensation, and the pleasure increases tenfold when you lift your hips then have him stretch you again.
Rubbing your fingertips into the back of his palm, you lift and slam back onto him again, causing a ragged groan from you both that ricochets off the walls of the room. It isn’t until now that you recognize how bad you’ve been needing this.
Needed him. 
You’re still nowhere near understanding why this need is inside of you. Anyone can give you pleasure, and he’s not the first, but nothing quite matched the warmth overtaking you when his cock pistons and rubs against your nerves as you ride him. 
The thought that Xavier was right about fate being written in the stars barely breaks through the thick fog of arousal clouding your brain. The heat spurs you to bounce harder to meet his jerking thrusts. 
He sighs under you; the pressure on his lower half increases while your eyesight blurs and your head angles back. You’ll both be each other’s undoing at this rate, he thinks, as he watches the beads of sweat accumulating in little shiny droplets on your forehead and on your bouncing chest in a light sheen.
Chasing that desire to see you undone, he pulls you to a halt, burying himself deep inside of you, before pressing his hand to your mound, brushing past the patch of damp hair to zone in on your sticky, swollen clit. 
The instant whine of his name makes him dizzy. Centuries have gone by, and he’s never heard you say his name with such wanton desperation nor seen you grind onto him, stirring his cock in you as if your sanity depended on it.  
His certainly depended on you. Always has especially in the many decades he thought he’d never see you again. That need is even clearer from how sensitive yet eager his cock is to you squeezing around it as you shudder on top of him while keeping an unbearably tight hold on his hand. Your movements come to a near stop except for the occasional rut to prolong the rush of your orgasm. 
The sight of you breaking down on top of him threatens to make his eyes roll back as he squeezes onto your legs for grounding. Your strangled gasp followed by your muscles relaxing tells him that you’re coming down.  
“I take it you’ve finished,” Xavier says with a smirk, and you only have half the mind to swat at his chest like a lazy cat. Your legs burn, your chest unable to fill with enough oxygen to catch your breath. You think you’ll skip the gym tomorrow but Xavier has other plans.
“I’m not finished,” he reminds you. 
You look down at Xavier; you’d been so busy finding your own pleasure, you didn’t realize he hadn’t cum yet. You feel a lingering guilt but he swiftly takes the situation into his own hands.
You’re still too sensitive to fight back as he slides his cock out of you with a wet pop. It takes two swift movements for him to lift you off of him and roll you onto your stomach.
Your chest feels restricted, tight to the mattress as he presses on top of you, his grey-brown hair rubbing your shoulder as he cuddles your back. It’s an affectionate notion, distracting from the pressure in your lower half as he slides off the last of his clothes and thrusts his cock back inside of you. 
You thought you were filled to the brim the first time, yet this angle was different. It felt much tighter, and the slightest shift of his hips had you muffling moans into your arms. 
“I want to hear you,” he sweetly requests, yanking on your hips to raise your ass higher and pull you further away from the muffling effects of the bed. Your fracturing mewls mix into his grunts, both sounds washing out the sloppy, wet paps of his cock pounding into you. 
His hand swoops down your bending back in one long soothing stroke before his head collapses onto you. His grunts are loud, tumbling right into your ear along with the slapping sound of his hips meeting your ass. Your legs feel like jelly, and the rest of your body becomes weightless as your mind only focuses on his cock recklessly burning its way through you.
Xavier’s breath rolls against your back along with his forehead as he buries you under his weight; his grip on your thighs tightens to an unbearable degree, leaving you to wonder if you’ll have marks in the morning. 
You don’t really care if he does when he moans your name and heat fills you, spreading with each sporadic thrust until he finally bottoms out inside you one last time and holds until he completely empties. 
Taking his time to enjoy the sensation, he waits before pulling out of you, making you whimper with the sudden void. Shakily, you collapse back into the sheets and flip onto your back with a sigh. His eyes are still half-lidded as he watches you; he chews briefly on his bottom lip, reminding you of the look in his eyes earlier. 
“Xavier,” you question but he silences you with a kiss, which you tiredly return. His fingertips slide down from your knee to your thigh, and he teases your opening, the mixture of cum making it easy for him to stroke your still spasming pussy. 
Xavier sighs against your lips before moving his kisses to the swoop of your neck. “You’re so beautiful and all mine.”
Your mouth parts with a dry moan as he slides thick fingers over your clit. It starts to ache from his touch but it’s hard to deny him, even as he tortures you with his methodic and precise rotations over the bead.
His name is on your mouth, each syllable heavy on your tongue. You leave garbled gasps in his mouth as he makes out with you while your hand draws down his chest, attempting to make a mental map of every twitching muscle and healed wound on the way down.
Your heart jumps with the twitch of his cock when you wrap your hand around it. There’s going to be no trouble getting him to rebound, you think. He’s already thickening again with the warm strokes of your hand and tracing of your fingers over the slowly beating vein lining the underside of his shaft. 
Xavier doesn’t even let you finish exciting him before he rolls back on top of you and settles his head between your breasts. Between all the cum in between your legs and his half-hard cock, it isn’t as mind-numbing to have him inside you. What is different is to feel him twitching and growing inside you with his renewed thrusts. 
You’re hiccupping by the time he pushes your legs back and starts to hit deep inside of you, leaving the corner of your eyes tearing. You’re overwhelmed with everything. The uncharacteristic amount of energy he possesses as his hips snap into you. How each powerful rock leaves tingles aftershock-ing inside you, ruining your chances to recover before he does it again. The heavy scent of sex mixed with pine overwhelms your nose. His sweaty chest blocks out any light in the room, sealing any notion that you can be distracted by anything other than him as he pushes up your knee towards your chest.
You’re quickly working up to your second orgasm; the painful cramping in your foot tells you it’ll be bigger than the last. You’re right. When you come undone again, it’s with a shrill sob. You’re too out of it to even register when he finishes until he starts kissing your neck again.
He’s still inside you, you realize once your mind finally lands back on earth. His cock is resting in the heat inside you, waiting for him to work the two of you back up again. You know that’s the goal when his thumb gently brushes over one of your nipples again. Your sore insides constrict and strain. You don’t think you could survive a third round. 
“Xavier, please, no more.”
“What’s wrong?” he asks, his voice dry and husky in your ear as he kisses under it. 
“Too much,” you tell him, pushing on his chest to make some space between the two of you.  
“I didn’t catch that,” he coos defiantly. When he notices that you’re being serious, he obediently pulls out of you. His kisses become smoother as he pecks your lips. “What’s wrong? Is it aching?”
You nod then puff your cheeks in frustration when you see the amusement on his face.
“It’s not funny!” you say, holding onto that angry, childish pout until his smile turns sympathetic. 
“You’re right,” he agrees and shifts off you. Quickly, he locates his briefs on the corner of the bed. He steps out of bed and pulls them on. To your surprise, he leaves you, alone and cold.  
“Where are you going?”
Xavier disappears without answering you and only the sound of running water gives you any sort of hint of where he might’ve gone. When he returns, it’s with a rag dangled in his hand. 
“A boyfriend should help clean his girlfriend up after times like this,” he explains and leans over you; he presses the wet cloth between your legs; the rag is incredibly soothing on your bloated skin. It’s a blessing to your sore muscles as he starts to massage and clean you. “It feels better already, doesn’t it?”
“I guess,” you answer pitifully, grumbling a bit because the look on his face still seems like he’s teasing about your neediness. 
“You don’t have to be embarrassed. It’s my fault you’re a little sore.” He’s definitely taunting you, but you don’t have the energy to fight about it. “All done,” he remarks, tossing the rag to a forgotten section of the dresser. He carefully climbs back on top of you, waiting for the moment your hand finds his bicep to guide him down next to you. 
It isn’t the first time he’s been this affectionate, and it won’t be the last time. However, this time feels more special than any time you’ve slept together, and not just because you can feel the stickiness of his sex-clad skin against your naked body. Well, that’s part of the reason.
“Something on your mind?”
“Nothing. I’m really happy,” you explain. 
“If it really makes you that happy, maybe we should do it more often,” he offers, and you pinch his unwounded cheek to punish him. Jumping back, he knocks your hand away and caresses his wounded face. “I’ll need another bandage if you keep doing that,” he complains weakly. 
“You only have yourself to blame!”
Xavier sighs. “You’re always right,” he concedes, more so that he can cuddle you without fighting rather than actually agreeing with you, you fear. 
“I don’t believe you.”
“Are you really doubting your boyfriend?” he asks. Heartbeat skipped, you clamp your mouth shut as he unfolds the blankets over the two of you. 
It’s finally settling back into your mind that the two of you are a couple now. “I’m still…not used to it yet with you being that.”
“You will get used to it the longer we’re together. The same as I will.” Xavier sighs, happily so. “Although, we might run into the same problem again.”
You blink at him. “Why?”
Thoughtful, Xavier hums then explains, “First comes love then comes marriage as they say.”
He catches you off-guard once more. As always, Xavier is forever forging on ahead with little regard for convention. “Aren’t you thinking too far ahead?”
“Maybe,” he agrees but there’s no drop in his confidence as he smiles at you and draws his hand over your hairline. “But I loved you since we met.”
“Xavier, please,” you beg, finding your favorite place to hide your flustered face in the crook of his elbow. 
He can’t help but laugh at you as he curls his arm around you. “Especially that,” he confesses and places one more kiss on the top of your head before inviting you to go to sleep. 
You do, falling asleep against his chest less than thirty minutes later. For him, sleep is elusive for once as he mulls over the day’s events.
The word girlfriend on his tongue is sweet. The idea itself burns wonderfully in his chest, but it isn’t enough. He knows he still needs to wait a bit longer, take his time, your bashful response to his prodding was enough to tell him that it isn’t time yet. It’s hard not to rush when this is the closest he’s ever been to the one thing he truly wants. 
Xavier guesses he’ll still have to rely on his dreams for a little while longer. It’s okay, he tells himself, it’ll work out this time. He’ll find a place to settle with you and have a quiet life, a place where he can see stars. 
And this lifetime, when he asks you to marry him, he hopes you’ll say yes.
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Soul Society is top heavy when it comes to power. With rare exceptions (Ikkaku), the gap between captains and rank-and-file troops, let alone normal citizens, is astronomical. How does Soul Society handle the reiryoku classism problem in and out of the Rukongai? Do the lower seats think of themselves as cannon fodder? Are there any major political factions that try to tackle the issue (ethically or not)?
So the gotei-13 is actually kind of a solution to this problem on accident.
The thing is, as powerful as the captains are, there usually only about a dozen of them, and a maximum of 2600 shinigami total. They are VASTLY outnumbered by literally everyone else, and because they need drastically more food than others (everyone in soul society needs to eat, but shinigami are at a drastically higher calorie demand and risk of starvation), they are VERY dependent on the rest of society. Zaraki made a fair fist of being a roaming menace but even he had to bow to the economy and work jobs to eat.
Hence, there IS reiryoku discrimination but it's largely in the other direction- shinigami are extremely exploited as workers, and that's the GOOD job. Other psychics are frequently drafted, kidnapped, enslaved for imprisoned so the rich and politically powerful can exploit their abilities. Even if a captain class individual were to say, take out a whole clan in self-defense, the rest of society would come down on them like a hammer and kill them or let them starve.
Yamamoto didn't found the Gotei-13 all at once. Originally it was just him, Sasakibe, the 200 spiritually aware students in his dojo, and the dojo was there to train the postal workers how to defend themselves against people trying to kill them for the messages they were carrying, but secondarily so spiritually powerful people didn't get press-ganged into serving the noble houses.
The first organization for psychic souls Yamamoto ever made was a... Relatively Safe Haven. He was also up against a wall dealing with the noble houses and other political factions so he needed anyone who could push back to do so, so a psychic would be expected to serve in at least some capacity. But the souls under his care were free to marry who they chose if they wanted or have children or not, or travel if they felt safe doing so, and even to just be weird without major repercussions, which was a vast improvement over the way they'd be treated as livestock by the noble houses. Even 1000 years later, Byakuya had to fight his family to marry who he wanted. Imagine what a psychic born in a random village and no legal protections would be facing.
So everyone with even an ounce of spiritual capacity was joining the postal service for his protection. It was a boon to the non-psychic messengers too- not knowing if a random Mail carrier could set would-be attackers on fire with their mind made all carriers safer.
...and them the Quincy attacked.
Yamamoto was now even more up against a wall because while having a united front had been helping him it was now a problem-the Quincy were attacking psychics specifically, something that endangered his ENTIRE organization.
...so he hired every spiritually powerful person he could find, including thriteen real bastards directly off of death row and organized them into an army to fucking deal with Yhwach.
Once yhwach was gone though, he had an army. And a lot of nobles looking to exploit or destroy that army.
Fortunately, one of the real bastards he'd hired had fallen for his peculiar charms and become his wife, and what Lady Tsubaki lacked in battle prowess, she more than made up for in political shrewdness. Be magnanimous, she explained. Be generous and speak of peace in our lifetimes and extend the olive branch to those who harassed you for so long. They won't realize it's bait.
So with her help, Yamamoto proposed that his army become the COURT GUARD in charge of protecting the very real and definitely alive Soul King, as well as all the people of soul society from the hollows and other misfortunes that may befall them. Finally, *proper* employment for all those spare heirs and potentially dangerous village psychics, doing the noble work of protecting society.
Why, he even helped found the central 46, a council of sages and scholars and general brain trust to work on the greater problems of soul society (a problem later but at the time, a VAST improvement over the eternally warring clans), that Yamamoto himself would be beholden to, just to show how civic-minded he was.
And just to finally, fully bury the hatchet- Yamamoto offered five of the captain's seats to the five remaining great noble houses, to be passed from scion to scion, ensuring each line would have a place in the direction of this army... Not realizing it was a trap to trick them into handing over any psychics they had, but also the high mortality rate of captains would kill scion after scion and gradually weaken the clans to the point of irrelevance.
And it WORKED.
By the time Ichigo turns up, the scion of the Shihouin clan is in exile with no plans of returning, the Shibas are reduced to a roaming band of pyromaniacs, the Tsunyashiro clan has been gone so long they don't even appear in the manga, and while the ISE and Kuchiki clans still both have representation within the captainacy... The Ise clan only has a brother-in-law and the Kuchiki are at a genetic dead end, and both those men are FAR more loyal to Yamamoto than their own clans.
Yamamoto has done what he set out to do- make a safe haven for the spiritually powerful to work the (not great but still best) protected jobs in the afterlife, destroyed his enemies the great noble houses, and largely wrested government control from them.
It's not perfect, but you can't fault the man for his accomplishment.
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dunmeshistash · 3 days
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As of... actually several episodes ago but more so on this episode, I'm starting to think there's something (a reason/correlation?) to the anime not going all out on the animation (youd think ep23 part 1 would have gotten more attention) or when its not doing a 100% panel-for-panel adaptation of the manga (ie cutting out gags and some other parts)
Its almost like the anime is slightly just a little maybe advertising the manga? but idk, you dont really get this feeling if youve never read the manga. It only torments those who have who know what's in the manga that the anime-only's are missing out on. and there's also the dungeon tidbits that dont/havent been adapted that expand more on the story.
lets be real tho, some things in the manga just would not translate as effectively into anime. (ie the manga covers that look raw as all hell)
tl;dr i have a feeling the anime is not doing the manga 100% perfect justice because animation restraints AND it wants you to read the manga as well.
I've actually been thinking about that too. But objectively I think the dungeon meshi anime is effective/overall good adaptation of the manga.
The feeling of "NOO IT'S MISSING X THING" as far as I can tell is only for people who have read the manga, everyone else doesn't seem to feel there's a lack of quality. I call it the cursed knowledge of the manga lol.
The fact is that the manga is just PACKED full of so many details an adaptation that has ALL of it is just impossible, and trigger's anime isn't necessarily bad just because it doesn't have it <- I say begrudgingly cause I wish it had all
From what I can tell they have been pacing themselves within their budget/time constraints and focusing on what the medium of animation can serve the best to compliment the manga, which is action scenes, they seem to be focusing most of their efforts into giving us BREATHTAKING animations during the action and honest I LOVE IT.
I recommend @swampjawn's animation breakdowns if you wanna really appreciate it in a more technical aspect, its so good.
youtube
But another thing I've been noticing is how much content Ryoko Kui does related to the anime? Like the merch, the blu-ray boxes the collabs. Is that something common at all? The manga author doing so much content related to the anime of their work?
Maybe it's an exception cause she finished publishing Dungeon Meshi before the anime came out but I hope that her gorgeous art inspires people to read it.
Anyway I'm not sure if trigger is on purpose doing "manga advertisement" but just where I believe they'll stop this season is probably gonna make a lot of people want to read so it's a win in my book.
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golden1u5t · 1 day
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back from the dead | a.h x fem!reader
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ꨄ requested: @vyviiennestar
ꨄ genre: angst
ꨄ summary: you find out that your best friend wasn't actually dead and you're extremely pissed that aaron, your husband, kept it from you for as long as he did.
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“y/n, get back here." aaron called after you, hoping that his voice was strong enough to keep you from walking out of the door. everyone stood there watching the scene unfold before them, still trying to wrap their heads around the fact that emily's not actually dead.
you could hardly believe that she was back, after all those months of sulking and crying to aaron about the loss and not being able to get out of bed. it had been a rough couple of months and you were just starting to come to terms with the fact that you would never see her again.
aaron was the last person you'd expect to do something like this to you, to the team. although it wasn't just him, ji was involved too, it sure felt that way because jj wasn't the one who sat up with you at night comforting you and telling you that everything would be okay.
you stopped in the doorway, your hands balled into fist by your side. there was an anger bubbling inside you, the type of anger you hadn't felt in years. "are you saying that as my husband or my boss?"
emily looked between you both and cleared her throat, signaling to the rest of the team to give you both some privacy. they made sure to close the doors so that when you started yelling—which they knew was coming—it wouldn't travel out of the room.
"y/n, don't be upset. please just sit down and let's talk about it." aaron followed after you as you rolled your eyes and walked out of the room, not caring if anyone else heard the conversation.
"why, aaron? so you can tell me about how my husband lied to me about my best friend being dead months? there's nothing else to talk about."
you stopped at your desk and gathered your things, you figured that you could follow the hunch about the case you'd gotten by yourself. aaron stood at the top of the stairs watching you, he didn't say anything else because he knew there was no point. just as the elevator doors were about to close, a hand slid through them to stop them from closing all the way, you could tell it was spencer by his hand.
"do you mind if i come with you? i can't stay here any longer." he sighed and fixed the strap on his satchel, you looked over at him and nodded your head.
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sherell-x · 3 days
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Can we talk about how Tamlin is so powerful he managed to use his magic to shield himself from LITERAL DARK MAGIC at the end of book 1 when he kills Amarantha & she lashes out at him to try & stop him but it doesn’t work but then Rhysand is getting swatted like a fly but then in ACOWAR I believe SJM decides veto’s Tamlin’s ability to shield himself against dark magic when it comes to Hybern.
It’s like she remembered Rhysand is the most powerful after she made Tamlin too OP so she went back on herself to try & correct her “mistake” in the hopes we wouldn’t remember…except…I REMEMBER SARAH & you will NOT for 2 seconds make me believe Tamlin isn’t on the same level of power as Rhysand or even more powerful than him.
We can also mention that Tamlin killed Rhysand’s dad in one blow a few minutes before the high lord power went to him because that power didn’t go to Rhysand or Tamlin straight away.
Let alone Rhysand himself states that he doesn’t actually know who would win in a fight between him & Tamlin & that a fight between the two would reduce mountains…this is a male that has the ability to mist & control minds & even with those two abilities he’s still unsure…SARAH YOU WILL NEVER FOOL ME!!
The fact that Tamlin has still not learned all his capabilities yet because he’s SCARED of what he’s actually capable of at his full potential & that is wild to me!! The fact that Tamlin likely has a lot more magical abilities that we don’t know yet because he himself hasn’t discovered/learned or trained them is wild to me!!
One last thing in ACOWAR Tamlin fought those hybernian hounds on his own to get Feyre, Azriel, Elain & Briar away, in that same chapter/scene Tamlin uses his wind power that so powerful it got them away safely & we didn’t find out that Tamlin even had that power until ACOWAR & then Feyre watches Tamlin jump so far & high that it’s not even deemed possible for fae to do that & then he winnows mid jump or fall…nope Sarah you could never make me believe Rhysand is the most powerful.
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greeneyessmize · 2 days
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Debling is not a bad man. He is not a "bad" option. He's forthright, shows attraction to Pen, has interest in her intelligence, and has a sense of humor that compliments her own. Yes, he also has oodles of money and a title.
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But, he isn't giving her even the slightest promise to try for love. He's going to be gone 3 years at a time. And Penelope is the richest woman in London, per the books and likely the show as well.
These last three things mean he is also not a good option for Penelope.
She wants love. She is very clear with him about this, both when they discuss romance books and in their final dance. His replies are that he is happy she has a passion for her reading and then that she is beautiful.
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While Pen says she values her privacy, what she actually values is her independence. Privacy allows you to keep a secret. Independence allows you to openly be yourself.
Pen. Does. Not. Need. Money. She needs an escape from her overbearing mother and petty sisters. She is choosing to marry in society so that she can still participate in it, and thus continue LW, but she has more than enough money to leave England entirely should she wish.
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Colin is entirely in step with Pen as soon as he understands that he loves her. They were already best friends with all the humor, warmth, and affection that comes with that bond. He adores that she is so smart and witty. He is seriously so very attracted to her as evidenced by him going feral not long after their kiss.
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He's not going to leave her behind. Even book Colin is very clear, Penelope is his home. And he will not be parted from her willingly. They would travel together, never apart.
He has money of his own, but no title. Penelope doesn't need either of those things as mentioned above. But he is a part of society, which is a nice bonus for her LW work.
Colin loves Penelope with all of his heart and soul. He gave it to her on a platter without her even needing to ask. He just had to know he loved her to give her all of him.
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I think it's inevitable that Penelope will have independence to be herself with Colin, too. It's their destiny. Will it be a struggle? Yes. Will it hurt? Undoubtedly. But Colin and Pen are meant to be equals. That is what friends to lovers has to contain. Friends to lovers is balance, harmony, a dance.
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Picking between Debling and Colin is like picking between a beautiful maze like mansion with too many rooms where sighs echo off of gorgeous furnishings but is so, so empty and cold and the small cottage that fits just right and is filled with cozy warm fuzzy feelings with a blooming garden outside and an always warm hearth and a sweet little sofa with your favorite comfy blanket and it is always Sunday morning with no chores to do.
Even if Penelope had been presented both options side by side, which she wasn't, she always would have picked Colin. Pen was only picking Debling when she felt to her very bones that Colin was not an option. Then Debling removed himself as an option which made Penelope believe she had no options at all until the carriage scene.
To Pen her choices were: haunted maze mansion or nothing then cottage of her dreams or nothing. Of course she was going to reluctantly accept the mansion over nothing and of course she was going to leap at her dream cottage as soon as she knew it existed.
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paradiseprincesss · 2 days
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the boy is mine - jonathan crane x reader
masterlist
notes: yeah so i wrote this in literally record timing because the music video to the boy is mine is so jonathan crane and his girl coded. i'd like to think i'm keeping u guys fed with all my fics i hope u like !!!
summary: you’re set on doing anything to make that boy yours, and the plan you curated is absolutely purrrfect.
word count: 4.3k
warnings: 18+ mdni, smut, p in v, oral (f!receiving), bondage/tying up, rough sex, overstimulation, creampie, stalking, obsessive behaviour, therapist/patient relationship at one point lol
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“perfect.” you whisper to yourself as you poured the last drop of the glittery, pink liquid into the small vile, swirling it around as you popped a cork into the top.
you smiled proudly as you sat on the kitchen floor of your apartment, holding up the vile to get a good look at it under the moonlight. it was fool proof — he’d for sure be yours after you forced him to drink this.
some would say you were a little unhinged, but you preferred the term creative. you were a little obsessed with your old therapist, doctor jonathan crane. you started seeing him when you stumbled across his pictures online, and you knew you had to have him. you booked your first session with him roughly nine months ago, and he was there for you every step of the way.
you didn’t actually need therapy (well…), but you still booked sessions with him because he was yours. it was meant to be. you couldn't unsee it. during your first ever session with him, you made sure to put on your cutest, most feminine and dainty mini dress, paired with some matching high heels. you even did your hair and makeup with precision. jonathan didn’t show it on his face, but when you sat there in that leather chair across from him for the first time, his heart started to beat a million miles a minute.
you were jaw-dropping. he couldn’t believe someone could actually possess such beauty, and though he tried to stay professional, it was proving to be quite difficult. every time you spoke, every time you smiled at him, every time you did absolutely anything — he would become more and more infatuated with you.
“i just wish he didn’t leave me, you know?” you say softly, feigning innocence, “it’s been so hard without a man to take care of me.”
jonathan clenched his jaw silently, he couldn’t believe that a man would be stupid enough to break-up with someone like you. be professional, he reminded himself.
“understandably so,” he said clinically, “i can only imagine how difficult it would be to have a relationship like that end so abruptly.”
“it was so difficult,” you say, your eyes watering, “but, i think i’m slowly starting to move on.”
of course, such "ex-boyfriend" did not exist. this was all part of your elaborate act to make him think you were an innocent, naive girl who was heartbroken and needed someone to save her. that someone being him, of course.
he was made for somebody like you.
you only had seven sessions between the two of you before jonathan abruptly reassigned you to his colleague, doctor webber. she wasn’t anything like doctor crane — she didn’t understand you the way that he did.
good things come to those who wait, but patience wasn’t your thing.
“i’m sorry,” jonathan doctor crane said to you, “as much as i want to continue to be there for you and your journey of growth, i believe that my colleague would be better suited to your…needs.”
“what are you talking about, doctor crane?” you asked, trying to to hide the desperation in your voice.
“i have another patient i must attend to,” he says flatly, informing you that your session had come to an end, “but i wish you all the best.”
and with that, he sent you to see doctor webber. of course, you were heartbroken. how could your soulmate do that to you? but jonathan wasn’t doing it because he didn’t want to see you — it was quite the opposite, actually. he knew that feeling this way about his patient was so very wrong, and if he continued to see you, he wouldn’t be able to control himself.
really, he did this for you.
as you placed your little love concoction on the kitchen counter, you turned on your tv. jonathan was supposed to be doing a segment with the mayor of gotham tonight about the crime rates in the city, and what him and his team at arkham asylum were doing to solve the issue. as his face appeared on tv, you sighed to yourself. he was so handsome in his suit and tie — and those sexy little glasses?
meow.
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the chilly gust of wind made you shiver for a moment, but your latex bodysuit kept you warm enough — well, not really. with your little cat ear headband, you toss your hair over your shoulders as you quietly make your way into the silent home. your black pumps were surprisingly silent against the wood floors, and you crept into the living room where a woman sat on the couch watching tv.
you went undetected as she completely missed your presence. stealthily, you creep behind her until suddenly, you yanked her by her hair. she screamed loudly, and your hand immediately went up to her mouth to clasp down on it; you were getting really good at this.
“don’t scream,” you whisper, “i just came here to tell you to stay away from my man.”
slowly, you remove your hand and she looks back at you with sheer terror, “wh-who’s your man?” she asked with fear laced in her voice.
you hated this bitch — she was one of jonathans patients. there was nothing going on between them, you knew that (plus you would’ve murdered her if there was!), but you had spent the last few weeks…"cleaning up the streets."
these ratty bitches had to go; any woman who was his patient or in his life at all had to go. you even dressed the part with your sexy little cat costume and all. you know what they say — in the eternal game of cat and mouse, there are no winners, only survivors.
“doctor jonathan crane,” you said dreamily, but your tone turned sinister within seconds, “and if you ever go see him again, i will find you, trust me. i've already found you once, and you don't want me to come prowling back around.”
the woman nodded frantically, and you went on your merry way. this was the last one, you were certain. you’d even made a list of all the women to threaten so that you could make sure they would stay away from your man. finally, you made your way home and started to wind down from all the break-ins you’d been making recently. it was hard work chasing down all these…mice.
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jonathan noticed that his belongings were going missing here and there over the last few months, and he knew something strange was going on. he wasn’t sure what the hell was happening, but something was off.
first, little things such as his favourite pen (yes, he has a favourite pen) went missing. then, a few patient files would seemingly disappear along with some sticky notes he had stuck on his desk the day prior. he didn’t think too much of it until one of his credit cards went missing from his wallet — but there weren't any fraudulent charges made.
he even continued to monitor his bank account and freeze his card, but no charges were ever made on it regardless. the last straw was when his spare house key went missing. even for a man as smart as jonathan, he could not figure out who was doing this for the life of him.
you were still attending your regular sessions with doctor webber, but you deliberately booked your appointments on days you knew jonathan was working. you knew you’d run into him either on your way in or way out, and you also knew he wasn’t that booked up anymore since most of his clientele went…missing.
as you said your farewell to doctor webber, you noticed jonathan walking out of his office. he noticed you immediately, giving you a soft smile as you turned to close the door to doctor webbers office. he said your name softly, causing you to almost choke on your own words as you clutched his house keys behind your back.
“doctor crane,” you say softly, “hey.”
“just jonathan is fine,” he said, but he internally scolded himself for saying that, “how have you been?”
“great,” you say sweetly, “doctor webber is…great.”
“that’s wonderful to hear,” he says, “it was nice seeing you again. take care.”
you two parted ways, and once jonathan was back at his apartment — he was to refrain himself from calling you. god, you looked so good today. with those little dresses of yours and good grief, those sexy, little heels you always paired them with. he grabbed himself a glass of whiskey, neat, and took a swig as he thought about you.
why did you have to be on his mind so much, and dear god, why did you have to be so fucking beautiful?
with a frustrated sigh, he looked at his front door, thinking about his keys that suddenly went missing just a week prior. was he overthinking things? was he just imagining it? did he lose his own keys and forget?
he was a psychiatrist for gods sake, why was he driving himself crazy over this? with so many questions and no answers, he made his way to his bathroom as he flicked his kitchen lights off.
the cold water ran from the bathroom sink as he splashed it on his face after removing his glasses, and he looked at himself in the mirror to get a grip. his pale, icy, blue eyes bore into his own reflection, and-
what was that?
he turned around swiftly, turning the tap off, watching as something, no — someone’s perfectly manicured hand ghosted over the edge of his bathroom doorframe.
he couldn’t see anything — the kitchen light was turned off, and the only thing turned on was his dim bathroom light. the master of fear himself felt a little fearful in this moment as he watched the dainty, feminine hand retract and move back into the shadows and he could've sworn he saw...cat ears?
jonathan had to blink a few times to make sure that he hadn’t spilled a vile of his own fear toxin somewhere and that he wasn’t just hallucinating off of it.
hesitantly, he pushed open his bathroom door only to be met with the darkness of his kitchen. his breath hitched as he flicked on the kitchen lights, but he was met with an empty, quiet space. his eyes quickly darted to the front door, but it was locked shut.
but if the door was locked shut, what did he just see? who did he just see? was the scarecrow himself starting to succumb to silly, little, irrational fears? before his mind could start to wander anymore, he heard a familiar sound.
a certain, distinct, and awfully familiar sound of high heels clicking against the wood flooring — and it was coming right from his bedroom. jonathan went over to his bedroom, swinging the door open unsure of what he might see, only to be met with a sight that made him feel weak in the knees.
you were propped up on his bed, in a latex body suit and high heels, along with cat ears to complete your rather sexy costume. you batted your eyelashes at him innocently, and bit your lip as you showed him the rope in your hands.
“how did you…” he whispered, watching you bite your lip as he trailed off.
“doctor,” you purred, “let’s get intertwined.”
“what the fuck…” he whispered once more, watching you as if in a mesmerized trance.
jonathan couldn’t lie — as much as he should have been terrified and calling the cops, he was awfully turned on right now. jesus christ, that latex cat costume that left absolutely nothing to the imagination? yeah, he was hard the moment he saw you.
“i know it’s simply meant to be.” you say softly, and as if his mind could not control his body, he was making his way over to you on his bed.
“um, what-“
“shh,” you hush him, suddenly grabbing him as you swiftly tie a knot around his wrists, “you don’t need to speak, baby boy.”
in mere seconds you had the scarecrow tied up on his own bed, restrained as you looked down at him. jonathan sat there looking up at you — yes, you were hot but you were clearly also insane.
to be fair, so was he.
he didn't bother trying to get himself out of the ropes. he knew that if he tried to struggle you'd most definitely do something not so pleasant to him. also, if he was being honest — this was hot. like, really hot.
"i just need you to do me a favour, baby boy," you giggle, your high heels clicking against the wood flooring once more, "drink this for me, and know that if you refuse, you won't live to see another day."
you held up a vile of pink, shimmery liquid. jonathan looked at you with a raised brow, and hesitantly nodded.
"...i'll drink it if you answer some questions that i have." he says, trying to bargain with you.
"fine," you shrug, "but make it quick."
"alright, first of all, how did you get in here?" he asked.
"easy, i crawled in through your window. next." you say in an awfully innocent voice.
"are you the one that's been taking my stuff?" he asks, and you nod.
"of course, i needed your stuff for my collection." you say whimsically, biting your lip at the thought of your homemade jonathan crane shrine.
in your apartment, you had a wall dedicated to him. it had cut outs of him, printed pictures, his belongings, his address, photos of him when he was younger — the list just goes on. all just regular, boring, stalker stuff, really.
"no more questions," you huff, "drink up, baby boy."
"what is it?" he asked, to which you rolled your eyes.
"an at-home love potion. i'm going to untie you for this — and if you even attempt to run, i will slice your heart in two." you say with an adorable smile.
jonathan doesn't offer a response, but rather opts out for a simple nod. you slowly untie his wrists, handing him the pink, glittery liquid in the vile. you watch him in awe as he closes his eyes and takes it like a shot, smiling to yourself as you realize that he's finally going to be all yours.
this little concoction that you had whipped up was the real deal — you'd even tested it on other men to see if it did what it was intended to do. it worked on them, bringing these men to their knees for you, but it's not like you really had any trouble doing that without a love potion, anyway.
after jonathan drinks it all, he looks back at you blankly. unbeknownst to you, when you were popping the cork off of the potion, he sneakily grabbed a vile of his fear toxin that was stashed by the foot of his bed — just in case you tried to actually murder him.
his plan was to immediately throw the vile at you and watch you succumb to your fears, but if he was being honest, he wanted to see what this shitty little "love potion" could do. he was a man of science, after all.
"i don't feel anything," he said after a moment, "looks like your potion didn't work after all-"
you cut him off with a small giggle, "you don't feel any different?"
"no."
"i've tested it, i know it works," you giggled, "that means if you don't feel any different from before, then you must already love me-"
suddenly, he lunged at you, making you scramble as you tried to fight back. however, he was much stronger than you, making it physically impossible to overpower him. after struggling for a good minute, he had you tied down on the bed like you had him just moments before.
"you're sick in the head," he says, but you could've sworn you saw him smirking, "you're real fucking twisted, you know that? i could call the cops and have you arrested right now."
"do it," you teased, "i dare you to, baby boy."
jonathan suddenly grabbed you by the neck, "what was that?"
you had you refrain from smiling as he choked you softly, feeling yourself get wet from just a second of his touch. you knew exactly what he wanted now.
"sorry," you corrected, "i dare you, sir."
"there we go." he says as he lets go of your throat.
he rummages through his bedside drawer and pulls out some of his own rope, causing your mind to spin at the idea of what he was going to do to you. you didn't run when he untied your wrists initially, but he took a few moments to tie both your wrists up to his bedposts, essentially tying you up so you couldn't move your hands at all.
"oh," you say with a teasing voice, "i see where this is going."
he smirks at you, admiring how sexy you look all tied up in his bed, with your costume and all. he takes his phone out and shamelessly takes a picture with the flash on, and you could feel that you were leaking your arousal down his bedsheets by now.
it seemed that your love potion didn't work on him because, well, he was already obsessed with you.
of course he was — but jonathan was known for his good work ethic. he only gave you up as a patient because it was only a matter of time before he would give in and most likely fuck you on the couch in his office. he just didn't know it was mutual at the time. if he did, well — that's a story for another day.
"maybe i should punish you," he smirks, making his way over to you on the bed, "you've been so disobedient."
"m'sorry, sir," you whimper, "you just make me crazy."
"i know," he cooed condescendingly, "but i think i can fix that, darling."
"you can?"
"i most definitely can," he says lowly, "it might take a few sessions to cure you, but i have a method i think might work on you. i'm gonna fuck you 'till you can't think anymore, no more thoughts after that. sound good?"
you nodded frantically, "mhm, yes. please, fuck yes."
he smirked at you, his hands reaching towards the top of your bodysuit. slowly, he reached his hands behind and unzipped it, slipping it off of you slowly.
"i like the cat costume," he chuckles lowly, "the ears are a cute touch."
you blushed, biting your lip as he slipped you right out of your latex bodysuit. obviously, you wore nothing underneath — not even panties. jonathan groaned at the sight because seriously, no panties? with your wrists tied up and unable to touch him, you were getting pent up real fast.
"i wanna touch you," you whined, "please."
he smirked, "if only you didn't break into my apartment like a stray."
before you could even formulate a proper response, he was crawling between your legs, spreading them out as he got onto his stomach. without warning, he licked a fat stripe up your already soaking cunt, latching his mouth onto your pussy. your back arched at the feeling, and he continued to lap you up.
"f-fuck, jon," you breathed, "feels s-so good."
"i know." he said cooly against your core, lapping up your arousal continuously as you moaned over and over again.
it was sinful how skilled he was with his tongue — it hadn't even been a full five minutes and you were already on the brink of creaming all over his face. he didn't give you any mercy as he continued to eat you out like a starved man, and your wrists were burning against the rope as you tugged on them.
god, the things you would do to run your hands through his soft, dark, and now tousled hair.
"nnnghh," you whimper, "i'm, ah- gon' cum!"
the coil in your stomach snapped as your release hit you like a freight train, making you scream his name as he made you cum. you were left a panting mess, and he finally released the grip he had on your thighs. after wiping his pink, plump lips along with his chin which glistened with your wetness, he smiled softly at you.
"taste s'good," he commented, "you look so pretty like this, darling. tied up and helpless."
"n-need you," you whisper, "baby, please."
this time, he didn't correct you and demand you call him "sir." maybe it was the heat of the moment or maybe it was the realization that he had finally met a woman who was as unhinged as he was. deep down, he was really loving the idea.
he started to undo his belt, making sure to keep his eyes locked on yours, teasing you as he undid his belt at a painfully slow pace. finally, after what felt like an eternity (it maybe thirty seconds at most), his cock sprung out of his pants, hitting his stomach lightly. it was long, veiny, and thick. how was that supposed to fit inside of you? surely it would split you open.
"cat got your tongue?" he teased as he unbuttoned his white button-down, stroking his cock a few times as your hips bucked into nothing.
"uh-huh." you whispered in awe, biting your lip at the thought of how his size was going to stretch you beyond your limits.
with a low chuckle, he lined his thick cock up with your begging hole, pushing in slowly as you felt him stretch your cunt out fully. he was so big and so long, the feeling of him just halfway inside of you was enough to have you pulling against the ropes again. the way the rope was digging into your wrists was degrading but undeniably hot. it was like a silent reminder of how little control you actually had over this whole situation.
"s-so full!" you squeaked, but he kept pushing himself into your tight, warm hole.
"s'okay, you can take it. and if you can't, i'll make you take it." he groaned, finally bottoming out in you.
you were stuffed to the brim with his cock and slowly, he started to thrust his length in and out of you. desperately, you let out a feverish moan. your breaths were short but heavy, and you were a fucked out, cockdrunk mess for him as he picked up his pace.
"you're so fucking tight, my god," he moaned, "i should've fucked you sooner."
"make me cum," you plead desperately, "f-fuck, yes, feels so good, jonathan!"
"yeah? you wanna cum?" he cooed as he continued to fuck your sopping pussy, "you wanna cum on this cock?"
"fuck, yes." you pleaded.
his cock was pressed snugly up against your cervix, so deep that you could feel him in your stomach. he continued to stretch your little hole out, ruthlessly pounding his thick cock into you more and more as you started to see stars. your walls started to flutter around him, letting him know that you were close without having to say a word.
"close already, darling?" he asked, "are you gonna cum for me again, hm?"
"y-yes!" you moaned, "ohmygod- i'm gonna-"
your words started to melt together at one point as you got lost in the pleasure of your high. soon enough, your soaking cunt was tightening up around his fat cock, and a clear liquid poured out from you.
of course — you were so turned on by the way he was screwing you that you'd squirted all over his bedsheets.
"oh, darling," he moaned, "that was so fucking sexy, jesus."
"j-jonathan, baby," you begged, "i-i can't-"
"you can, i promise," he groaned, "i'm close."
"p-please." you started to beg incoherently, the overstimulation making your head spin as your cunt fluttered around his cock again.
he continued to ram your tight pussy until his thrusts started to become sloppier and sloppier, and you could tell that he was close to the edge.
"cum i-inside," you begged him, "i need to be filled, fuck-"
"okay, okay," he panted as his he gave you a few more deep, harsh thrusts, 'm'gonna fill you up, darling."
you nodded, your head spinning as he finally came inside with a low groan, painting your walls white as he stuffed you with his warm seed. he stilled, staying inside of your warm hole for just a little longer to ensure you got every last bit of his cum, before pulling out his semi-hard cock.
he bit his lip as he watched his cum drip out of you (the sight of him biting his lip almost made you cum again), and he reached over to untie your wrists as you slumped down against the pillows. he laughed softly, pulling you into him as you instinctively cuddled into his arms.
he pulled the cat ear headband off your head, which you forgot you still had on, and tossed them to the side.
"i guess i'm going to have a hard time getting rid of you, huh? stalker." he joked, sighing as he took in all the details of your pretty face.
"you won't be able to get rid of me," you say softly, "i'm obsessed with you."
"good, i don't want you around anyone but me." he says, playing with your hair gently.
"i know," you giggle, "but stupid love potion was useless. i should've known you were already in love with me."
the both of you laughed softly, snuggled up in his bed as he told you all about what he did on the side for work — and all about his plans to fear gas gotham city.
jonathan trusted you with this because he knew there wasn't a line in existence that you wouldn't cross for him.
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dante-mightdie · 3 days
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so, in the cult au, what does laswell do? does she also have a sweet wife that welcomes her home every day with a hot meal? has anyone in the cult ever disrespected her because of her sexuality? i’d love to hear your thoughts :3
laswell my love <3
c/w: mentions of loss, cult!au, mentions of bigotry but none actually occurs
i’m torn on what I want kate’s role in the cult to be. part of me wants to make her price’s contact on the outside. I imagine at some point john came onto the feds radar, making them wonder what actually happens behind those gates, why so many people have gone missing near those woods yet they can never find any real evidence. every once in a while they show up with some bullshit warrant and rip his compound apart, even going as far to trash his home whilst he comforts his crying wife :( shaking his head disapprovingly at them for making a pregnant woman upset. they never find anything
she uses her position in the CIA to give john warnings when they plan on raiding his community. she knows it’s technically wrong but she knows johns community isn’t a threat to anyone really. she knows if he’s left alone, he won’t bother anyone and she has bigger things to worry about in her line of work
OR
she’s actually a part of his community, perhaps she even runs the cult alongside him. they worked together for years, broken down by all the hate in the world. no matter where they stomped it out in one place because it always popped up in another so they just decided to create a sanctuary on earth away from everyone else
john and kate have no room for hate within their community, they have a strict screening process for anyone joining their family. kate and his wife are very well known and well loved in their community, in fact her wife can often be found contributing to the community in anyway she can
they have their own little family of rugrats too :( taking in the few children who had unfortunately lost their parents in some way or another
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pupyuj · 12 hours
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→ “ruin our friendship.” || kim gaeul x reader fic.
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— for years, gaeul has trusted your heart and tried to find whatever good you saw in your douchebag of a boyfriend, but she has had enough. and now she wants to show you that you deserve so much better...
word count: 6.9k.
dynamic: dom!kim gaeul x sub!taken!reader.
warnings: bffs-to-lovers, cheating, oral, fingering, cunnilingus, facesitting, faceriding, overstimulation, masturbation, praise kink.
requested ? : nope.
a/n: i don't even know how long this has been rotting in my drafts but SHE IS FINALLY FREE! and we have our first gaeul fic AND I HAVE OFFICIALLY WRITTEN A FIC FOR EVERY IVE MEMBER EYAYYYY 🥰💖 now i don't have to worry about possibly looking like i favor one member more than the others omg guys i can assure you i have thoughts about ive unnies all the time, the ones for yujin are just loud as FUCK. much like herself. ANYWAYS, HEHE I HAD A LOT OF FUN WRITING THIS and i hope you all love it 💕
p.s. as usual this is not proofread thoroughly so apologies in advance for any mistakes! 😭💞
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ever since entering college, you and your best friend gaeul have had to match your schedules perfectly in order to hang out and even talk regularly. those assignments couldn’t finish themselves after all, as much as you hoped they did. years before, you and her would have the time of your lives shopping and visiting the many different restaurants your vast city offered, but now, everything was different. and in gaeul’s most humble opinion, your busy lives as college students wasn’t the only problem. she could name a few actually! there was her part-time job at her mechanic father’s service shop where she spends most of her time sitting on a chair and listening to middle-aged men try to woo her as they wait for their car to get fixed, and there was your side gig as some small-time coordinator in a pretty popular live house in the downtown part of the city.
but gaeul can’t exactly be angry at your jobs for pulling the two of you away from each other! what she can be angry about was you were always distracted whenever you did go out together. here’s a clear picture: you would be sitting with her in a cute coffee shop after two weeks of not being able to see each other and there gaeul is, talking about the shenanigans that happens in her classes, her dad’s shop, and her life in general. then, she’d find you spacing out, or staring at your phone—just completely ignoring her. for the first few times it happened, gaeul just thought that perhaps you were just worried about your schoolwork!
it made sense after all. you were some kind of academic overachiever that always used to nag at gaeul to finish her geometry homework during your high school days. gaeul was going to be fine with it all; she even thought about things she could tell you to soothe your head but one little peek at your phone screen ruined it all. every ounce of patience in gaeul just disappeared into thin air once she saw that you were distressed because of your stupid boyfriend’s messages.
ugh. your boyfriend.
now, gaeul wasn’t one to shit on her best friend’s lovers just because, okay? ninety-three percent of the time she has a valid reason! here’s the breakdown: your boyfriend is manipulative, abusive, possessive, and ugly. one would say that maybe he wasn’t always that way, or that maybe he’s struggling with things! well, gaeul can confirm that he has always been horrible to you and that whatever the fuck he’s dealing with doesn’t give him the excuse to be such an asshole to someone that genuinely cares for him. gaeul can’t even count how many times you’ve showed up at her doorstep in tears because of him. 
she really can’t understand why you’re still dating him. it’s been about five years since the two of you got together and really, the only good thing you got from that relationship is a ride to the campus and if you’re lucky and he actually feels like being a decent boyfriend for once, some fancy clothes. clothes that he picks out for you, and he can’t even get that shit right! he doesn’t know your style, the kind of clothes you want to wear, the brands you’ve always wanted to get clothes from, and in general, you. gaeul knows people like him all too well. people that only want you to fill a very specific void in their miserable life.
gaeul can’t stand him. you deserve so much better, you can do so much better.
and gaeul is better.
just like that, an idea pops up in gaeul’s head as she sits in a booth in her favorite diner, but she didn’t have time to think about it because she looks out the window and there you were in a pretty, pink sundress with your hair arranged in a cute braid adorned with little butterfly clips. gaeul lets out a chuckle—rei, your roommate, must’ve helped you with that. gaeul also notices that you were wearing the sneakers that the two of you bought together so you could match, which warmed her heart. even more so when she remembers that she was wearing her own pair of those sneakers too!
gaeul watched patiently as you entered the diner and greeted the waitress behind the counter like you always do. a bright smile spreads across your face once you find gaeul in your usual booth, and gaeul feels herself flashing her very own grin as you start walking faster towards her.
“hey! sorry, i’m late. i had to change my entire outfit. i didn’t think it would be so warm today.” you said, pulling gaeul into a quick hug before sitting across from her. gosh, you looked beautiful! the baby hairs that stuck to your forehead and the sides of your face only made you look even cuter, gaeul almost wanted to reach out and pinch your cheeks.
“careful. look any prettier and someone might mistake you as my girlfriend.” gaeul quipped. she finds herself grinning proudly as you laugh.
“you look dashing yourself! they probably already think you’re my boyfriend, but you’re not neglecting me for ‘a night with the boys’ so we would get found out quickly.” you sighed. you were clearly disappointed, but you covered it up with another laugh before sipping on the glass of water gaeul kindly ordered for you.
“then today is a date. he probably hasn’t taken you in one for ages, anyway.” gaeul doesn’t know if you’ll actually buy it. she wasn’t even joking! as far as she knows, his version of dates is taking you on a boring ass car ride and spoiling you with useless shit. she knows what you want on dates. she knows what you want in general. let this work.
you giggled, “true. it’s a date then.” and she doesn’t miss the shy smile on your face afterwards.
well! it looks like this was going to be easier than gaeul predicted.
as the two of you ate your lunch, you talked about school and how life has been treating you both. you were thriving for the most part! you were up to date with your coursework, your job hasn’t been too demanding or taxing, and you were able to have enough breathing space in your life to actually meet up with gaeul, like right now! it seems like the only problem in your life was your boyfriend. he hasn’t been spending too much time with you, and one would think it might be because he’s gotten busier but nope, he’s as shitty as gaeul describes him to be. he only wants to hang out with his team and his stupid friends, and he barely talks to you even in text! that asshole.
gaeul didn’t let you dwell on it all though. she absolutely detests seeing you upset. especially over that useless fucker. she distracts you with a few funny shenanigans from working in her dad’s shop, and how she has actually been doing quite well in her classes! it was clearly your influence. hell, if it weren’t for you, gaeul wouldn’t even be in college at all! you gave her direction, and now you were giving her all the motivation she needs to make it through one school day at a time.
fuck, your boyfriend was so lucky. gaeul has to let you see that he wasn’t worth anything you’re giving him. she has to pull you away and make you see that a pretty girl like you needs to feel good!
in more ways than one.
“so, boyfriend, where are we going?” you joked as you settled yourself in the passenger seat of her car. while gaeul started the engine, that was when she put her little scheme in motion.
“bowling. or rather, sending the balls to the gutter for two hours straight.” she said. bowling happens to be your favorite stress reliever, it always has been! gaeul always liked watching you as you played. even when you didn’t hit any of the pins, you still had fun. gaeul was willing to bet that your pathetic boyfriend rarely ever takes you bowling.
“god you’re the best.”
“mhm, i know.”
from then on, gaeul knew it was going to be a breeze. especially when she did get on the road and you just allowed her to put her hand on your thigh. you didn’t even notice at first, occupied with fixing your charming but unruly hair. but then gaeul lightly squeezed your thigh, caressing slowly just to test the waters, and finally, you noticed her. she was afraid that your attitude would change, but it seemed like… you liked what she was doing. and so gaeul’s hand stays in place. she took note of how you squeezed your legs together every time she caresses your skin gently, or how you would sometimes put your hand on top of hers.
the drive to the bowling alley was quiet, save for the music you’ve put on, of course. silence was a rarity between the two of you since there was always something to catch up on, things to complain and whine about, people to talk shit about, and casual conversations that have become needed just to have some sense of normality in your chaotic lives. gaeul was afraid she had made you uncomfortable because come on, she was quite literally trying to take over your boyfriend’s place! joke or not, this was bound to make you just the least bit weirded out!
imagine gaeul’s surprise when she briefly glanced over to your direction and find you looking relaxed. not even the constant buzzing of your phone was able to break your focus on the road. just like that, gaeul doesn’t stop a smile from forming on her face. forget about him.
and it seems like as soon as gaeul parked her car near the bowling alley—you did! you took gaeul’s arm and started gingerly dragging her through the doors, giggling as you did so. it was easy to secure a spot for the two of you, the place wasn’t too busy yet after all.
“two hours of this? you ready to lose, kim?” you said with a mocking smile as you approached the lane. gaeul sat back on the couches behind you, smirking as she very shamelessly checked your backside out unbeknownst to you. there was a small table in the middle of the u-shaped couch that gaeul sat on where you laid down your phone. as you busied yourself making your cute little bowling profile on the monitor near the lane, gaeul glances down at your phone that kept lighting up at it vibrated. your boyfriend was calling you, and he has sent you a dozen or more messages that you still haven’t bothered to look at.
gaeul sneers at the picture of your boyfriend on the screen. he really didn’t deserve you! luckily for him, she will happily take you off his hands. gaeul takes your phone and declines the call, smiling happily when she leaned back on the couch and continued on staring at your beautiful form. you hooked a medium-sized ball with your hand and prepared yourself—sure, you were never the best at the sport but you were to have fun and have fun only! and so you delivered the ball and hit exactly seven pins. gaeul tilts her head a bit to see the look of pure joy on your face and finds herself grinning along with you.
for once, it was not at all a bad start for you! you grabbed the smaller ball and prepared to take down the last three pins at the other end of the lane. upon staring at your near flawless little pose that especially accentuated your ass, gaeul whistles. the sound catches you off-guard and you end up messing up your throw, sending the ball into the gutter in a fit of laughter.
“you little devil.” you said, playfully glaring at your best friend who has stood up and started stretching all of her limbs.
“this is where your short-lived lucky streak ends,” gaeul pats your butt as she approaches the lane. and of course, she didn’t lie. gaeul delivers a ball and hits her first (and certainly not last!) strike. she winked at you while you stared at her, mouth agape at how she didn’t even hesitate to not go easy on you. “cat got your tongue, baby?” your best friend teased.
you don’t even notice the nickname, what with your competitive spirit alive and well. “oh, it is so on, kim gaeul!”
and for the next two hours, you and gaeul had the best time of your life in that bowling alley. the longer the two of you were together and the more you got drunk from pure joy of being with each other, gaeul got bolder. she was touching your waist, your back, and sometimes even rested her hand on your ass for more than a few seconds! you didn’t care—in fact, you were just as bad! grabbing her and pulling her close to whisper things in her ear (partly because the music would have drowned your voice, mostly because you wanted gaeul nearer), allowing her to not-so-discreetly touch you in places a best friend should definitely not, and finally, sitting on her lap, playing with the collar of her shirt and telling her to take you to her home.
exactly zero innocent intent at all, and gaeul was seemingly more than happy to comply!
on the way to gaeul’s apartment, it was noticeably… warm. both of your hearts were beating fast and loud from anticipation. gaeul yearned to feel your skin without the hindrance of your clothes getting in the way. her fingertips itched to feel goosebumps run along your arm, shoulders, and back as she touched you in ways she always dreamed of doing. her lips longed to taste yours since she knew that peach-flavored chapstick you two liked to share would taste so much sweeter if you were the direct source. gaeul wanted you, and she was going to have you—boyfriend be fucking damned.
when gaeul flipped the lock on her door, the two of you were all over each other. bags and jackets thrown to some random corners, shoes messily removed and left all over the living room area. gaeul barely twisted open the doorknob of her bedroom door, being so focused on exploring every crevice of your mouth with her tongue until she tugs you inside her room. her lips stayed locked with yours as she sat on her bed and pulled you to her lap, hiking your dress up and squeezing your ass. your moans were much, much sweeter than she imagined. she shivers at the feeling of your fingers playing with the back of her neck, her own whimpers only encouraging you to busy your hands with unbuttoning her shirt.
when you’ve successfully taken her shirt off, your dress was next. and gaeul made sure to take her sweet time with that! her hands caressed your thighs, gently squeezed your hips and even moved you so you could grind on her thigh (the cute whine she earned from that was very much appreciated!), and then her hands stayed wrapped around your waist as she placed soft kisses along your collarbone. you could feel her smile against your skin when you squeezed at her arms, knowing damn well what you wanted but refusing to give it to you because… well, if this happens to be the only time she fucks you then she might as well make it last!
finally, when gaeul was satisfied with the little marks she had left on your collarbone, she started pulling the ribbon on your back and loosened up your dress. “you made sure to look pretty for me, huh?” she asked as she watched you undress yourself. she took note of the bright blush on your cheeks under her dark stare, and it made her think that perhaps she wasn’t the only one who was thinking of fucking her best friend for the longest time. meanwhile, in your defense, it’s been quite a while since you had to dress yourself up and what better occasion to do that than hanging out with your best friend?
plus, if it got you to get fucked by the friend in question then you’d say that the two-hour preparation was worth it!
when gaeul laid you down on the bed, she noticed how you suddenly became quite tense, looking as though your boyfriend was about to come breaking down gaeul’s doors to drag you back with him. gaeul made sure to relieve you by kissing your forehead, taking your hands with hers and then putting your knuckles to her lips. “you’re safe with me, (y/n).” she whispered, pecking your knuckles gently and smiling at you. sure, it works… but the fear that bubbled up in your stomach did not go away.
“if he finds out about this…” you pull your best friend close, letting her embrace you while you wrap your arms around her neck.
gaeul scoffed arrogantly, “he won’t—”
“—if he does, i don’t know what i’ll do,” you never told gaeul that your boyfriend has been watching out for her for the longest time. he was always suspicious of gaeul, saying that he was so sure that she wanted to fuck you and make you hers. because of his suspicions (that now proved to be true), he always made sure to be annoying and text you and call you an absurd amount of times whenever you were hanging out with gaeul. he never does that when you’re out with your other friends. no. that behavior was reserved for the one person he was threatened by. “i don’t want him to hurt you.” you said. you can’t even imagine what he would do to you, let alone the girl he absolutely detests.
“he’s as dumb as a brick. i could fuck you in his own bathroom and he’d have no idea.” gaeul makes a mental note to reserve that exact scenario in the future.
you couldn’t help but stifle a laugh, “you know he can very much send you to the hospital, right? he’s like, three heads taller than you!”
“three heads yet he’s still stupid enough to treat you horribly and practically give you away to me,” gaeul sneaks her hands behind you, unclasps your bra and pulls it off of you in one swift motion. your heart beats louder every second gaeul’s eyes travel downward, soaking in more and more of your naked beauty that she longed to set her eyes on forever. “i’ll teach him a thing or two about giving a pretty girl the pleasure she deserves.”
every doubt and fear you had evaporates into nothing as soon as gaeul puts her lips against your skin once again. sucking, biting, licking—anything she can do to leave marks and make you remember this night akin to a skilled painter perfecting their masterpiece with every stroke. you feel gaeul’s hand trail down your stomach and palm your soaked panties, and you had an almost automatic reaction to grind against her, blushing wildly upon hearing her chuckle at your enthusiasm. gaeul wraps her warm mouth around your nipple, your back arching at the feeling. an embarrassingly loud moan escapes your mouth when she flicks the hardened bud and presses her palm flat against your clit at the same time.
you were losing further control of your actions. grinding restlessly on gaeul’s hand for further pleasure, taking her free hand to play with your other breast, and even pushing her head impossibly closer to your chest. she was skilled with her tongue—you shuddered at the mere thought of what else she could do to you should this night go on for longer. you feel gaeul slide her hand inside your panties, only to feel your pussy with her fingers rather than fucking you immediately.
it was adorable how impatient you were. you needed and wanted to be pleasured. it must have been quite a while since you’ve gotten some action—gaeul isn’t surprised that even in sex your boyfriend can’t deliver. every flick of your nipple, every pinch to the other one, every parting of your pussy lips, and every brush against your clit, you were mewling. you would be embarrassed if you actually heard yourself but instead, all you could focus on was the little pleasure gaeul was giving you right now.
“that feel good, hon?” gaeul asks as she presses her lower palm against your clit harder than ever. she found your little nods endearing and your inability to find the words to answer her only inflates her ego, but as much as she would love to tease you all day long, she was just as desperate for you as you are for her.
“how long has it been since he’s made you cum?” she asked, slowly pulling your panties off and letting it drop to the floor. gaeul keeps her eyes fixed on you, looking for discomfort or doubt or any sign that tells her how you could be feeling about all of this. while gaeul knows that the two of you have already crossed a point of no return, she knows that if you gave yourself the time to think about all of this, you would come to your senses. in other words, you would get the fuck out of her house and never talk to her again. it would be disheartening, yes, but gaeul unfortunately knows you well enough to know that it would be possible.
to her surprise though, you seemed to have stopped caring now. you didn’t even bother to glance at your phone that was on the floor, vibrating wildly due to the amount of times you were being called by your boyfriend. you only silently beckoned for gaeul to touch you, to taste you, to claim you. and gaeul doesn’t need to be asked twice to oblige!
“he… he has never made me cum.” you admitted, looking away from the embarrassment.
“are you serious?” gaeul laughs, but then her jovial expression is replaced with an incredulous one. “you guys do have sex, right?”
“of course we do! just… h-he’s horrible at it… every time we’re done, i have to get myself off because he never can!” you covered your face in frustration, now just wondering how you actually survived years without being able to cum with your partner during the act.
“fuck, he really is worth nothing at all, huh?” gaeul cackles. ah, poor you… but you didn’t have to worry about not cumming tonight, because gaeul just now made a silent promise that she’ll make you cum as many times as you want. she lowers herself so she could be facing your pussy, all wet and ready just for her. just as gaeul was about to bury her face in between your legs, you take a hold of one of her hands and intertwine it with yours, making her heart swell with affection. she doesn’t look back up at you, knowing that the blush on her cheeks would be too noticeable. gaeul starts off giving your cunt gentle kisses and little licks—hearing you softly whimper and seeing you jolt every time the tip of her tongue so much as brush slightly around your clit gets her adrenaline going, and eventually, gaeul commits herself to eating you out.
within mere minutes of practically making out with your pussy, gael feels you put your free hand behind gaeul’s head and pushes her closer. “more…” you could barely say, too caught up with the euphoric feeling gaeul has instilled in you using her tongue alone. it takes everything in gaeul to let go of your hand to part your lips to have better access to your clit, and when you grabbed a fistful of her hair and let out a beautiful moan, gaeul knew she was doing something right.
something adorable gaeul notices is that you were extremely sensitive when it comes to your clit, more than any woman gaeul has ever been intimate with and even herself. she licks a stripe up your cunt, relishing in your taste and the way you whine her name, before sucking on your clit. it’s almost as if you’ve never had your pussy eaten out this good before! and truthfully, you really haven’t. gaeul’s own satisfied moans created a buzz in your head, letting you know just how much she loved and savored your taste with each lick. she brings a new kind of pleasure when she makes out with your clit at a gentle, slow pace. the kind of pleasure you would never find your boyfriend (or anyone else for that matter) to be giving you.
it almost makes you wonder what gaeul’s true intentions were. of course, you weren’t expecting her to be completely in love with you. if she was, the first thing she would do to show it was not making you cheat on your boyfriend with her. was she just looking for a quick hook-up? but if that was the case, she could have just grabbed some random girl instead of putting your friendship in an awkward spot like this. perhaps you were just another box in a list that she wants to check off, but that would be cruel and completely unlike the gaeul you have known since the two of you were young. with the way she was cautious with how she fucked you, touched you, and even handled you during all of this, you wanted to believe that she has some sort of undiscovered feelings towards you.
but why were you even thinking about that? did you even have feelings for her? that was a dangerous territory you never wanted to explore, not when you cherished your friendship too much. but the ‘idea’ of dating your own best friend was never really just an idea with you. not when gaeul had ten times the charm that makes your boyfriend look like some hopeless wimp. not when gaeul will forever be the person that knows you the best. not when every time she does something as simple as tell you you’re pretty, or open a door for you, or laugh at your jokes, or smile at you so handsomely, the tiniest of butterflies flutter around in your stomach.
it was a scary feeling, one that you always hoped to go away one day but these days, and especially today, it has been hard. maybe when this is over… you don’t have to run away from it anymore, because when you look at gaeul’s eyes that pierced right through yours even as she was eating you out, you can see something beyond the hunger, the lust, and the desperation.
whatever it was, you found yourself more willing to uncover it, even if it might ruin everything.
“you’re so perfect, (y/n)...” gaeul snaps you out of your trance and immediately after, she dips her tongue inside you. “you’re better off with someone else… someone who knows you better, inside and out… mmhn... don’t you agree, princess?”
you whine shamelessly, “y-yes..! ahh… with you…” now you didn’t even mean to let that slip past your lips, but gaeul seems beyond satisfied that you did. completely addicted to your taste, gaeul pulls you closer and further down the bed by your waist, your back arching with how well she was using her mouth. the pleasure gaeul brought was enough to make your thighs twitch, your legs slightly rise in the air, and your eyes to roll to the back of your head.
“you cumming soon, baby…?” gaeul asks, briefly lifting her head slightly from in between your legs. a sly smirk graced her features, knowing that the cause of your incoherence was her. it gives her the confidence to do a lot more to you, to do everything she has been wanting to do for years. you seem to notice how she had paused to stare at you, and you shoved her face back down to your core, earning a chuckle from her. gaeul pushes your thigh back, almost lifting your leg up, for better access and eats you out better than before as if that was even possible.
at this point both of your hands were on her head. you would be worried about the tight grip you had on her hair but you were way too busy on that tight knot in your stomach. you think you hear gaeul encouraging you to cum, and you can vaguely feel her palm resting on your stomach and it does help you relax a bit. enough for you to have the strength to look down at your best friend, whose eyes have always been on you this entire time. god, she was pretty… and she looked like she belonged right where she was. she didn’t give you any more time to admire her though, as a flick of her tongue on your clit sends you to a blissful orgasm.
your body softly falls backwards your bed as you throw your head back with only gaeul’s name filling the air. gaeul spends a good few seconds staring at your face—her doing. you were simply bewitching in her eyes. she made sure to take her time cleaning you up while you came down from your high, waiting patiently until you’ve caught your breath and calmed down. she sees you breathing normally and smiles before rising up, attacking your face with a barrage of kisses while you laugh and take her in your arms.
“don’t get comfortable. this is all we’re doing until morning.” gaeul, more than ready to please you all day and night long, places a wet kiss on your collarbone before sliding her hand in between your legs. she was well on her way down your core until her phone blares loudly—someone was calling her. she ignores the sound, opting to kiss down your neck while her fingers start ghosting over your clit. and just then, you turned your head and got a glimpse of the caller id on the gaeul’s screen. but gaeul sees it first and she swipes her phone away with a dark chuckle.
“w-who is it…?” you asked quietly, not wanting to alert whoever was on the other end. gaeul’s smile grows wider as she puts the caller on speaker. your heart drops to your stomach as soon as you hear the other person’s voice. 
a man. your man. your fucking boyfriend!
“are you there, kim?”
sheer panic courses within you. you tried grabbing gaeul’s hand, but she moves away, pressing a single finger against your lip. and then her mouth moves, but she doesn’t make a sound. trust me, she says silently. you kept still, trusting your best friend to not do anything stupid. of course she wouldn’t put you in any danger just to have fun, but you did worry that she would set your boyfriend off enough for him to do something to her. your heart beats loudly in your chest and goosebumps appear all over your skin. you were terrified beyond comprehension, but gaeul’s soft caresses and reassuring eyes comfort you, even just a little bit.
“what do you want?” gaeul asked, annoyed that he just had to interrupt the two of you. her hand once again travels downwards your body until she reaches your cunt. she traces your lips before inserting the smallest length of her two fingers, making you bite back a moan.
“where’s (y/n)? why isn’t she answering her phone?”
gaeul grins and plunges her fingers deep inside you, she couldn’t hold back a quiet laugh as she watched you choke out a moan. you immediately covered your mouth, pitifully glaring at your best friend but not being completely mad at her. her fingers felt too good inside you—staying perfectly still just to get you to get used to the feeling until she starts moving, slow and steady as if she herself was savoring the feeling of your cunt clench around her digits.
“what was that? is that her? are you fucking my girlfriend?!”
gaeul cackles, “you wouldn’t know what (y/n) sounds like when being fucked even if you’re the one fucking her.” she increases her pace, even nodding towards you to get you to relax and just keep trusting her because she could feel your fear. it made her angry. no one should claim to be your partner if they made you feel so afraid of them. you shouldn’t have to beg for them for their time and love either. if gaeul had known that this was what everything from back then would lead up to, then she would’ve intervened when you and your boyfriend were still just acquaintances. but there was no point in dwelling on that because she has the opportunity to make this all right.
and the correct ending to all of this was her freeing you from him, him ending up all alone, and the two of you figuring out what to do with each other.
“you bitch! i swear to god if that’s (y/n)—”
“—i’m not fucking my best friend, shithead. you should start worrying more about the fact that she’s refusing to call your lacking ass back.” gaeul watches you intently as you slowly lose most of yourself to her. moving your hips accordingly, meeting her little thrusts with eagerness that only got gaeul herself drenched. you tugged on gaeul’s top, silently asking her to get off the call already and just fuck you. and that you didn’t have to ask her twice, of course. while your boyfriend kept yelling at her, gaeul ends the call before blissfully dropping her phone to the ground.
you don’t know what came over you, but all of a sudden you wanted to see your best friend under you. tugging her down harder, catching her lips with yours in a searing kiss… feeling sick satisfaction in you when she stiffened at your sudden surge of passion, and using her shock to flip your positions over. gaeul pulls her fingers out, putting them on your hips instead and trying to keep up with the way you kissed her feverishly.
“you’re cute…” gaeul whispers, thoroughly entertained by you. ugh, those eyes. that nose, her perfect moles, her smile, that mouth… fuck. you have to feel her lips on your pussy again but this time… you wanted to be in control. you smile at your best friend as you swipe your thumb across her lips before getting in position.
“holy shit, (y/n)—”
“—shut up, man.” you cut her off with your face so warm you think you might explode. she didn’t look like she was turned off by the idea. in fact, gaeul places her hands on your thighs, looking more excited than she has ever been this entire time. “t-tell me if i’m hurting you… or anything.” you said. gaeul merely nods, eyes focused on your core. you were going to say a few more words, maybe tell her that you haven’t sat on anyone’s face in a while so you might be bad at this but gaeul couldn’t wait another second. she pulls you down, and the sound that escapes your lips when her nose bumps against your clit was simply criminal.
“ffuck…! oh, g-god…!” with one hand tightly gripping the headboard and the other holding onto a random pillow, you start riding gaeul’s face. and again, she was moaning. as if a better flavor has never graced her tongue until she got to taste you. gosh, the way you threw your head back and let every lewd sound fill the air as you rode her got gaeul clenching, but she couldn’t keep her hands off of you either. she squeezed your thighs, almost as if she was encouraging you to go faster and just use her.
“mmhgn… so good… more, please..” letting go of the pillow and the headboard, you put your hands on gaeul’s head. you ride her faster, focused on pleasing yourself and chasing another orgasm while gaeul does her work with her tongue. it was getting harder and harder to hold herself back from touching her own pussy; she was too drenched and you were simply too delicious. at this rate, she might just cum untouched! the idea of it was humiliating almost, but gaeul figured that if she made you cum hard enough then you wouldn’t even realize what had happened to her. but then again… why would she go through all that trouble?
with one hand, gaeul reaches down and unzips her jeans, sliding further down and massaging her clit through her panties. of course, you don’t see this. you don’t even hear gaeul over the sound of your whimpering and moaning—all you wanted was to use her mouth to get yourself off. you managed to open your eyes slightly, however, and looked down at gaeul. her eyes were shut off, eyebrows furrowed deeply as she diligently ate out and fingered herself at the same time. 
you heart swells as you allow yourself to etch every single facial feature of hers in your mind. you didn’t think you’d find a more fitting place for your best friend. it turns out she looked good underneath you, too! when you got distracted by admiring gaeul’s face, you felt a sting on your ass. you gasped loudly, and although it caught you off guard, you liked it. you moved your hips enthusiastically as gaeul squeezed your ass, now glaring at you to intimidate you to keep going. and it works! well, it’s not like you were going to stop just like that.
“p-pretty… you belong right here…” you said, gripping her hair tighter. gaeul moans at your words and she feels herself only clenching tighter around her own fingers. she didn’t expect to get so turned on by merely fucking you and hearing you talk to her in such a different way than usual. she pushes her tongue inside your cunt, making you scream in pleasure. gaeul’s ears ring at the sound of your voice—she was sure now that you wouldn’t dare go back to that pathetic boyfriend of yours.
you were hers now. and she has always been yours.
“gaeul… babe, i’m cumming—god…!” with one last thrust on your best friend’s face, you came. moaning blissfully in the air as gaeul allowed you to ride your orgasm out, and while she laps up your cum as best as she could, she hits a satisfying climax which grants you the perfect chance to hear a cute squeak from her. gaeul removes her hand from her panties and holds you down on her face, not entirely satisfied to let you go even though she can see that you can barely keep yourself sitting. that wasn’t going to be a problem anymore though as gaeul once again flipped your positions so you would be sitting on the bed and she would still be in between your legs.
“mmh… stop, i’m tired… please.” you shake your head weakly, gently tapping gaeul’s hand. fortunately enough, your best friend respected your wishes and stopped, opting to scoop you up in her arms instead and hug you. you laughed at how much of a mess you made on your best friend’s face, wiping all of it clean with your hands before giving her a quick kiss. gaeul doesn’t forget to get rid of her pants before staying completely still in bed with you, staring at nothing but your pretty face for minutes on end.
you think you fell asleep a couple of times, and you ended up always opening your eyes to gaeul smiling dumbly at you like a lovesick puppy. if you had known gaeul allowed herself to see you in such a different light, then you wouldn’t have wasted time trying to fall in love with a boy who did nothing good for you. but no matter, you were going to leave him, and finally, you and your best friend can work towards a more fulfilling relationship for the two of you.
“i always knew it’d be you in the end.” gaeul whispers as she leaves the tiniest and sweetest kisses on your knuckles.
the tiniest bits of fear settled in the pit of your stomach—you didn’t want your boyfriend to find out about this at all. you wanted to protect gaeul and dump his ass with as much as peace as you can manage, but you know he was going to bring her up somehow. at the end of the day, the blame should be put on you since you were the one who allowed gaeul to make those advances towards you anyway… but you knew all too well that that wouldn’t stop your boyfriend from coming up with an excuse to try and confront your best friend.
but every time you dwelled on those thoughts, gaeul somehow notices it and keeps your eyes on her. she knew she would be able to pull your attention to something else and that she does rather effortlessly. and you knew that you would be safe, as long as you were with her.
you laugh at her words, “i’m glad that you didn’t fuck me just because i’m hot and you hate my boyfriend.” you joked, earning a playful slap on the shoulder.
“no, stupid,” gaeul pulls you closer by your waist, kissing your nose. “i love you.”
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deadbeat-motel · 3 days
Text
ᑕᕼEᖇᖇIᗷOᗰᗷ ᗩᑎᗪ ᔕIᖇᑭEᑎTIOᑌᔕ ᖇEᗪEᔕIGᑎ
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The last two designs for the main cast. With these two done, I can finally work on miscellaneous characters that I've been eyeing the most.
Again, thoughts below the cut:
My issues with their Original designs:
Sir Pentious:
I thought I would only have one thing to say about him (the unnecessary eyes) since he was my favorite in the entire original cast but having taken a closer look at him for this, I saw a lot of things that bothers me.
Too many eyes. specifically the lower half of his body has too many eyes and it seems detrimental to him. It's kind of painful to think about it since I do not think we ever see those eyes close. Is he just slithering on the ground with those exposed eyes? That's got to be irritating at best and damaged at worst as he continuously slithers on them.
There are eyes on the bowtie and the hat? There are already 4 extra eyes on his hood, so why have even more? I get that the original Pentious design was basically a monsterous amalgamation of eyes but the eye thing could have been scrapped altogether.
While his palette was the least red out of the cast (More so composed of yellows), it still blends in with the rest of the reds.
The claws are an unnecessary repeating design trait (Alastor and Vox notably have them too). I don't think it would've been too big of a difference to just keep his fingers fully black.
The stripes on his suit are too thick. It's called pinstripes for a reason.
I don't like how the hat is shaped to fit the head, It's awkward.
not a point, but I just wanted to say how the blue color palette works really well with him in that last episode.
CherriBomb:
She's not that bad of a design (She's sort of bland in my opinion) but it's the little small details about her that makes her so simple and also so complicated at the same time. There are so many batches of freckles scattered everywhere, little explosion lines on her skirt as well as the X on her chest, the tattoos are a jamble of random loops and bombs, and her tattering doesn't have an easy shape to consistently draw.
The thought process for these two:
Mx. Pentious:
Pentious goes by both Sir/Miss/Mx. but uses she/they pronouns.
Minimized the actual amount of eyes on her, I kept it only to her actual eyes and those on her hood.
Gave her a butterfly-shaped hood. It's nothing deep since it stems from the fact the notches in Sir Pentious' hood almost looked like one to my bad eyesight. I decided to play more into that idea.
I read some posts where people talk about how Sir Pentious should have a snout and while I understand why and fully support people giving him one, I really didn't want to add the snout to this design. It drove me crazy since I'm not a big fan of it. I tried a compromise where her head was shaped more like Phineas.
Kept the tophat but removed its eye and mouth. If I remember correctly, Viv took that from one of her co-workers from the pilot. I decided to just have it as a regular tophat.
It doesn't have all the colors, but her design does have the Neptunic flag.
I'm not sure if this even is a real snake but I based Mx. Pentious' design on this:
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CherriBomb:
Scraped most of her features in exchange for a sukeban theme. I personally have zero knowledge about the punk scene in Australia.
A majority of the suggestions I received for her rough draft had something to do with the skirt. I elongated it and gave it a slit in which the magenta from the inside is able to pop out.
Thought it would be a cute detail to have her hair explode if she's angry.
----
Apologies this took too long to be posted, Life got in the way as well as the fact I was feeling shitty about Pentious' first draft. Her skin was an awkward and ugly shade of green and seeing some posts critical of Pentious' design got me to think a little bit more about what direction I'd like to move her redesign.
You could see this in the earlier rough sketches but this was how Pentious' first redesign looked like
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bonefall · 3 days
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Thank you for speaking out against the ableism towards Moonpaw, genuinely. I’m an actual intersex person with XX / XY chimerism, and I have slight physical ‘abnormalities’ resulting from it, too.
The XL Bully post being at the top of the Moonpaw tag genuinely hurt my feelings, and badly. People equating her chimerism to a ‘deformity’, making jokes about how ‘oooh she killed her twin in the womb LOL’ and all that…
I tried expressing concerns with a pretty well-known designer/artist who reblogged that post, but they just blocked me - and not before making a snide comment abt how I’m apparently ‘evil’ because I, too, ‘killed my twin in the womb’.
It’s so upsetting that almost nobody will actually give two fucks about the irl people that they’re shitting on - physically disabled people and/or those with chimerism - and will just cower away when their hypocrisy is pointed out. Thank you for spreading awareness
XX XY Fusion Chimerism is cool as hell and I'm so sorry there are people out there who are unironically acting like serfs from the fucking dark ages about something that happened when you were an EMBRYO. Like, we understand that there is nothing EVIL about things zygotes do, right??
We ALSO understand that fertilized eggs don't literally eat each other??? What happened wasn't some struggle for dominance where the larger twin hunted the smaller one down, something happened and two sets of complete genes merged. There's a few ways this can happen, one of them being because there were two eggs that didn't fully separate to begin with-- so both get fertilized and then one zygote "retreats" back into the other one.
You didn't kill your twin. First of all, there wasn't another "twin" to begin with, it was just a bundle of cells because we are talking EARLY pregnancy. Second of all, there's a high likelihood that it wouldn't have even been capable of getting carried to term anyway. If ANYTHING, Chimerism is the only way that ""twin"" SURVIVES.
But. I'm doing the thing where I'm barking logic at something completely irrational. Mostly I hope it makes you feel a little better.
What was said to you was shitty. Jesus Christ. Chimerism and intersex conditions are not a deformity. Being disabled isn't a cosmic punishment. You're not evil for existing.
(I'm feeling a need to just. Pause on that. Who the fuck implies zygotes are capable of evil. I thought we all agreed Brokenstar's plot thread was ridiculous why are we doing it for REAL PEOPLE).
Insane that someone needs to say this but these aren't hypotheticals. Everything I'm talking about with this discourse is based on the existence of REAL. PEOPLE.
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causenessus · 2 days
Text
cold kisses
part 0.7. PRACTICING
PLAYING FROM KODZUKEN'S STREAM . . . just for me by pinkpantheress
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if he’s honest, he doesn’t remember her last olympic performance very well.
of course, she's had other programs since then that he's seen, and it didn't really matter. the last olympics was years ago and she was always changing, always improving, always doing something.
it was something he admired about her. while he was fine with the bare minimum and doing just enough to stay busy or get by, there was always some opportunity she was auditioning or registering for. it had been that way since their time in high school, where on top of her own sport she’d help out on the volleyball team, come watch his games, and make sure he’d finished his assignments by the day they were due. he couldn’t deny that her habits had rubbed off on him; she was part of the reason why he had taken up streaming, why he had stuck with it through the rough patches, and why he was trying his best in school (albeit with a little bit of support because sometimes it was a pain in the ass).
what did remembering her last olympics performance have to do with anything?
he wanted to remember it. something other than her dress being a passionate red that matched her personality well and the black color it slowly faded into. a part of him still selfishly thinks maybe she chose those colors because it was his volleyball team’s colors too. the only other memory that comes to mind is atsumu's hands on her hips, and he doesn't want to linger on that.
he doesn’t remember what song they did, or anything about their actual program. he could watch it, but he doesn’t want to hear the commentators say anything stupid about “how well they work together” or worse, a criticism. he doesn’t want to see her little score go up ever so often and how it compares to others, because if he was in charge of judging he’d easily give her the highest scores for every element.
that's another thing he remembers; she’s flawless. she puts in so much time and effort into everything she does, practicing for hours on and off the rink. sure, she skims the ice and sometimes her landings just barely miss perfect precision–she’s complained about every single tiny mistake she’s ever noticed to him–but she’s always handled those little slip-ups so well he never would've paid another thought towards them if she hadn't mentioned them. every one of her movements has a special kind of unmistakable grace, her eyes looking brightly toward the future. it was similar to shoyo and how far he had clambered up into the world, yet it was never enough for him and he was always searching for a new way to do something. they were both such beautifully optimistic people, and perhaps he attracted those kinds of people in order to balance out his own apathy.
when it came to her, sometimes that apathy fell away completely. he wasn’t lying when he had told her that he often got distracted by her. in general, really, but especially when she skated. he enjoyed coming to her practices which had been a lot more often when he was younger and didn't have streams and homework to worry about. more times than not, he had chosen to sit on the sidelines over the comfort of his home. he would bring his switch or sometimes just his phone to play on but only until she started. he always set his device down completely as soon as she was on the ice, entranced by her every movement.
today would be no different, and he would sit with composure through anything atsumu tried. he had to keep reminding himself that partners were always touchy. they had to be touchy. he was stupid to even consider it that; it was integral to the performance that they grabbed onto each other and trusted their partner in order to execute their tricks.
he had his own plans of making atsumu jealous after all, he just had to keep thinking about that instead.
as soon as y/n was out of class, they took the train to the rink. he listened to her talk about her day as they rode. he had skipped school so he didn’t have much to offer her back. they held hands when he noticed someone taking a picture of them, and then for a little while longer until they separated as they approached the ice rink she was practicing at. 
they stopped in front of it as she started to explain something before she decided to just grab his hand once again to lead him inside, guiding him to where he could sit while she continued to talk. he tried to listen to what she said instead of thinking about their hands. she was obviously excited as she explained the ice rink to him; some kind of long history and something about how the roof had just been redone.
he would have paid more attention if he hadn’t seen the blonde approaching them, and her words died down as she noticed him only a second later.
atsumu neared with a smile as nonchalant as always, hands shoved into some black jacket over his athletic shorts. he took one fist out, holding it towards him as he nodded in acknowledgment.
“kozume. i don’t think we’ve seen each other since high school, right? how’ve ya been?”
he forgot he had even known atsumu in high school when he'd been twice the dick, a volleyball player and figure skater.
his face almost cringed for a number of reasons. he forced himself to return the fist bump while his mind buzzed with annoyance simply due to atsumu's voice. “yeah. good to see you,” he forced the words out of his mouth.
y/n had stiffened up next to him and he rubbed a thumb along the back of her hand. he almost wanted to kiss her now just to start something but it wasn't the right time. before either of them could say anything else atsumu’s gaze slid towards y/n. his smile didn’t change at all, he only gave her a wink. “see ya on the ice, y/n.”
it wasn't anything special. he winked at anyone he saw as a greeting. the only thing it was good for was making her feel uncomfortable. but moreover, using her name rather than a pet name wasn't the norm for him. whether it was because kenma was around or because he was backing off (as a part of his plan or genuinely), she’d have to decide later.
 he hadn’t hinted at anything fake yet and he was as calm as ever even upon seeing kenma who had come without any prior notice.
she had been holding her breath without even noticing and exhaled, feeling the tension break in the air as the blond walked away. “well, now that that moment's been ruined, i’ll go change. you can sit over there if you want and i’ll see you later,”  she told kenma, giving his hand a squeeze before she let go and followed in the same direction as atsumu.
they came on together later in one of the outfits he’d seen in the latest post of some ice skating account. they took their time warming up while he took his seat near a chair with a folder on it. y/n glanced often in his direction as she passed by and he would always give her a smile which seemed to make her smile and whole appearance brighten and she’d speed up a little.
the sound of footsteps near him drew his attention away from the rink and he turned to look up at a man who was already looking back at him. he didn’t seem very old, maybe in his late 20s or early 30s. his blonde hair was pushed back by a headband, easily revealing the double piercing on his left ear.
this was her coach if he wasn't mistaken. hadn't she described him as a “pretty princess?"
kenma could only stare at him, waiting for him to say something. he wasn't entirely sure what part of "princess" y/n saw in him, but maybe he had a nice personality under his initial appearance.
then he took out a cigarette and lit it, throwing that thought out the window.
he continued to look at kenma as if he was trying to remember something while he blew out a puff of smoke. whenever someone gave him that stare it was because they were trying to remember where they’d seen him. it was either going to be “aren’t you that boy that plays the games?” (mostly grandmas) or “don’t you play volleyball?” (bonus points if they say something about nationals or “you’re with that guy with the weird spiky hair, right?"). 
“didn’t you play volleyball in highschool?” he finally decided.
“yeah. i’m kenma,” he answered, unsure of what else to say. a pause later, he stuck out his hand–wasn’t this what people did when they met each other? he wouldn’t know.
“ukai,” the man responded, shaking his hand. “did you play for nekoma or something? went to nationals? y/n made me watch your game, i’m pretty sure,” he sat down near him, picking up his folder and flipping through it.
should he have known more about ukai? other than what y/n called him?
“yeah, i did,” kenma said, averting his eyes to the floor.
“you were their setter?” ukai asked, quirking a brow at him. when kenma nodded he continued, “yeah i’ve definitely heard about you. pretty sure y/n said you were her favorite or something.”
she skated by just as he mentioned her name, giving kenma a small wave.
he waved back, “oh, really?”
ukai watched her skate by as well before looking back down at his folder, “i won't ever forget it. she yelled it at me almost every time she saw you when we watched that game. what, are you guys dating now? thought i saw you walk in with her holding her hand and all that shit.”
another cloud of smoke left his mouth with his last sentence and kenma's face slightly warmed. when he put it like that, it made them sound childish. and how often did she talk about him? what else had she said?
“whatever,” ukai continued, looking towards him again, “i don’t mind you being here. she likes you and you seem like a nice enough guy. make sure you’re good to her. there’d be hell to pay if you break her heart, and not just from me. she’s got some pretty memorable friends too, i'm sure you know them. one of them comes here often to watch, i think he even came with us when partners were being announced.” they were a few seats away and ukai patted the seat next to him, “here, sit closer. i’ll explain their choreography to you.”
kenma was a little hesitant at first, unsure if he wanted to be that close to y/n’s coach (and his smoke) but if ukai already knew so much about him, at least kenma would learn more about him and y/n's performance.
just as he moved seats, y/n and atsumu had made their way towards the center of the rink and ukai was yelling directions at them from his seat.
he flinched at the volume but tried his best to pay attention to what ukai was saying and their movements as speakers overhead began to play a song.
ukai sat back farther in his seat the cigarette falling limp between his teeth as they began while kenma remained upright. “you know a little bit about skating, right?” he asked.
he knew the basics, which was probably all ukai was asking about but it wasn’t good enough for kenma, he felt like he should've know more about her sport before coming here. “yeah. just a bit,” kenma shrugged. 
ukai didn’t seem disappointed in his answer and continued to watch the pair in front of them skate. as the hours passed, he had pointed out certain tricks they did, explaining how they’d be rated, how important their footing actually was, and how impressive they really were.
kenma had walked into this rink planning to be as calm and passive as possible towards atsumu, yet everytime he saw atsumu's hands run along her and brush past her skin he felt like he wanted to tear hair out. he'd already told himself it was normal–this was how they had to be, he had to have that hand on her thigh–but it didn’t make the stress in his chest any lighter.
kenma watched as atsumu placed her back on the ground for only a split second before his hands were on her hips again as he lifted and twisted her into the air. it all happened so fast that when he heard her yelp, kenma wasn’t even sure what had happened. he still hadn't processed what had went wrong before atsumu caught her, both of them almost tumbling onto the ice.
her hand was gripped tightly around his arm, their faces inches from each other. she was staring wide eyed into his eyes, her body still trying to catch up to what had just happened. she’d been so close to hitting the ice she thought for sure she was about to land and injure something–probably her shoulder that had twisted oddly at some point in the rotation.
atsumu was breathing just as heavily, his arms still around her torso. he was leaned over her as if he had just dipped her and they stayed in that position for a moment until they had both recovered and he helped her stand back up. he was grinning at her as he removed his hands from her. “you alright there? that was my fault, sorry i scared ya.”
she was still trying her best to calm her heart back down when she replied breathlessly, “yeah–i'm good. it was probably my fault, i don’t think i was close enough to you, sorry. thanks for catching me.” she returned his smile before skating off to ukai who was leaned over the railing asking how they both were.
atsumu followed after her and kenma watched them both approach. atsumu didn’t even bat an eye in his direction, which probably was a good thing. he wasn’t sure exactly how he looked but he was pretty sure he was staring daggers into him.
kenma tuned back into ukai's conversation with y/n as he stepped away from the railing, “that’s enough for today, you guys can come off the ice and go home. take it easy on your shoulder, you got it, y/n?"
she nodded with a sigh, rolling her right shoulder before she turned her gaze towards kenma, a smile on her face as she moved towards the opening in the rail. he offered a hand as she stepped off the ice onto the ground. she took his hand, sighing again before she talked in a quiet voice to him, “it was going super well until the end, sorry you came on a day where we messed up that twist, we’d been doing pretty good, too.” her lips were pursed into a small pout and he couldn’t help but smile.
atsumu was coming off the ice after her and it felt like the perfect time to do it.
he pushed a stray hair behind her ear and cupped the side of her face to grab her attention. “hey,” she looked up at him, one hand reaching up to hold the hand that he had on her face, “you did good, mistake and all”
he leaned closer, closing the gap between them and he felt the way her body stiffened and the noise of surprise she made before she pressed back against him. her lips still felt cold from being on the ice for so long, and it was a welcome contrast to his own temperature. he found he actually quite liked it a lot. the steps behind her went silent and kenma couldn’t resist opening his eyes to see atsumu’s reaction.
to his dismay, atsumu only looked surprised by the kiss, but there wasn’t any hint of anger or jealousy in his eyes. when atsumu noticed that he was looking, he only winked and gave him a smile that looked as if he supported the two.
when she pulled away from him, she followed his eyes to look at atsumu and her face flushed a light pink. moving quickly past kenma without another word, she unlaced her skates at a nearby bench before she disappeared down the row.
neither him nor atsumu said anything. they only stared at each other for a moment longer, atsumu still wearing a pasifistic smile before he followed after y/n.
he hadn’t hinted at pretending at all yet but in kenma’s mind there was no way he supported y/n and him. what was his goal?
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extras <3
this is another chapter i split up bc it was a little long so apologies if the beginning of the next chapter seems a little choppy 😔
AND if my writing sucks idk why it suddenly feels so foreign,, this is that identity fraud imposter thing people get coming in at full force
yes kenma calls atsumu by miya in his texts BUT in the written portion atsumu sounds better than miya imo and i NEED it to sound good </3 NAMES ARE SO HARD I HATE THEM SOMETIMES
I sit in the corner of my room with my little computer and type my silly little hyphens and semicolons please leave me be (I'm talking to my own brain)
while they were texting, kenma really wanted to say something like "yes i'll come to your practice, i want to support my friend" but he physically could not bring himself to refer to y/n as just a friend
y/n was trying her best to respond normally and casually when kenma asked if he could kiss her but she was screaming on the inside to herself during class
iwa showed up at noya's dorm demanding to know what happened bc no one (suna) would tell him. noya was literally shaking but tsukki did not give a single fuck and opened the door to let iwa in
y/n got excited everytime kenma smiled at her if u couldn't tell
atsumu has a phd in gaslight gatekeep girlboss
ukai is such a father figure for y/n and kenma is definitely on his way to getting his approval
i've decided to make kageyama a very important character in this smau because i am in love with him (this will come into play in like 8 chapters lmao)
taglist: @rinheartshyunlix @kettlepop @eggyrocks @cr4yolaas @httpakkeiji @keioover @does-directions @calx-bdo @staygoldsquatchling02 @cherrypieyourface @iluv-ace @kitty-m30w @h3xi2g0n3 @mylahrins @thechaosoflonging @momoriii-i @localgaytrainwreck @a-pastel-edgelord @bugglesboop @polish-cereal @osakis-gf @phoenix-eclipses @faesix @ryeyeyer @skylarkalchemist @kunimix @sereniteav @kodzubaby @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @r0seandth0rns @gsyche @kitnootkat @seillarium @tamimemo @myromanempiree @coldcigarette @eclipticnikki @squiishymeow @vivian-555 @cryptictheseus @eclecticeggknightpsychic @kodzukein @kawaii-angelanne @luvly-writer @kodzuken-hoe @kodzuken88 @bookworm-center @theweirdfloatything (form to be added to taglist! <3)
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