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#However that 1 is the one I mentioned earlier that generally comes at extreme times when I need them most
goldshykitsune · 15 days
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Gosh it's so werid right now...
My school gave out awards for the graduating class, with of course only those who got awards and their family can go (or friends if they got it approved by their family.)
I got two of them and it just hit me...
I didn't do the most that I could have.
I know why. I know how I could have improved and what outside factors stopped me. But overall I look and I see what I did get and I just think to myself... like... wow.
I actually made it to getting two awards...
Like... two awards!
I mean I believe some only got one. Though quite a few got more then two. I knew most of the people. A few I couldn't quite recognize or remember if I knew but the majority I did.
And that also made me think. Like I knew so many amazing and successful people and I managed to be up there in rank with them!
It was really cool.
However with this said it also reminded me about the fact that soon I will not be a minor.
Soon I will be an adult.
Very soon, in fact it's only a matter of days.
... 5 or 4 days...
It kind of scares me. Like I will not be a minor. I'll be going to college. Likely will get a job too. I have to clean my room. Make sure I pass one single class or I perish because this one class will determine if I graduate. (I'llget it but like I'm gonna explode with stress.)
I got a bunch of tests this week into next. I got a few projects that aren't done and I got very little time.
However I know I can get through it. I just... mentally might not be very good right now.
#I started hallucinating#I do that sometimes#probably not good but I can't afford to go talk to anyone and I don't trust asking my family for help signing up for this one online thing#it says you must be older than 19 to sign up on your own and like... I definitely ain't there yet.#I also gotta say I've been feeling lonely lately.#I got a voice/fictional person I have who comforts me and forces out bad things and tries helping me tackle the mental issues I got going on#I honestly dunno what to call this one as it only shows when things get pretty bad.#I got multiple fictional people/voices that go around in my mind helping me.#or not helping#like how I have a few of them which I associate to intrusive thoughts (and yes I mean intrusive not compulsive but I got some for that too.)#I even got some for emotions for when I dunno how to feel. sometimes I dunno how to feel sorry for someone or empathic/sympathetic and so#I got a person made up to help in situations. I just pretend I'm them.#or when I'm distraught or panicked or really upset or other strong negative feelings I have two that help.#one of those two will stay even after#However that 1 is the one I mentioned earlier that generally comes at extreme times when I need them most#though I have “seen”/“heard” them without being that way before too.#but by a year of school I can get distraught at the end because of everything being due and it's pass or fail moments so I panic a lot#I also get distraught and upset#and lonely and really a lot of negative things which takes toll on my mental health meaning that's were the one person comes from.#anyways I got off topic. if people want though I might elaborate what these tags mean and are talking about.#so I guess I should go#but I mean I would congratulate my friends here but I dunno their tumblrs/they don't have one.#so instead I will congratulate everyone who got a reward at school ever in their life for whatever reason#even if it's something silly like having the messiest desk.#or something about community service cause that is a great thing and even if you ain't got a reward for it I congratulate you.
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lostlegendaerie · 1 month
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Veritas Ratio and Autistic Representation
Chances are you know autistic people in your life; autism itself is a fairly recently coined term, dating back to 1911, and can encompass a wide variety of symptoms and eccentricities which have existed since the dawn of humankind. (The 'fey-touched' child or changeling in European lore shares a lot of traits with autistic children.) Autism is a spectrum, encompassing and overlapping a lot with ADHD and other neurological disorders. There are probably millions of people out there, especially from older generations, who are on the spectrum and have no idea. I did not even get my diagnosis until I was 27.
So it is entirely possible that the creators of Veritas Ratio from Honkai: Star Rail did not intend to write him as autistic and based him on people they knew in their own lives, who, diagnosed or not, are on the autistic spectrum. However, the point of this piece is to talk about the ways in which Veritas Ratio is good autistic representation (in my opinion as a autistic person), and how people who want to write characters like this can take a page out of Honkai's book in their own work.
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1) SPECIAL INTEREST. Ratio shows a *staggering* amount of dedication to the pursuit of knowledge and his quest to cure the world of ignorance. This quest of his tends to supersede everything else in his life, with no mention of any friends, family connections or romantic partners in his character story. (Said as a Ratiorine shipper - not sinking any 'ships, here) His dedication to education started early, with reading college undergraduate education levels while still in middle school - seven or so years ahead of his peers. Autism is considered a disability, yes, but it does not exclude you from being smart, and the fixation on your chosen topic(s) can be extremely useful in motivating you to reach the top of your field. His path being The Hunt also outlines this dedication; he is seeking his target without rest or distraction.
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2) SENSORY ISSUES. Ratio very explicitly can become distracted and disgusted by the feeling of dirt or sweat on his skin, something that tends to be more prevalent with specific clothing textures but absolutely can manifest in a need to feel clean. He also can apparently become very irritated and overwhelmed by lights and sounds, and wears his plaster mask as a way to deaden and deafen the amount of sensory input that he receives. This allows him to think better, and is a fantastic example of what it feels like to suffer from sensory overload. (If you find yourself getting stressed in crowds, try bringing earplugs and putting them in the next time you're in a noisy restaurant and see if doesn't help you out.)
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3) STRONG SENSE OF MORALITY. Autistic people tend to suffer from a somewhat black-and-white feeling of right and wrong, and can hold themselves and other people to an extremely strict moral code. This does not mean that they are always correct in what they believe is right and wrong, but it means that they can be extremely passionate about following those rules. Ratio's beef with the Genius Society and their selectivity is indicative of his unwavering passion towards sharing knowledge with the masses, but the tactless way in which he wishes to cure ignorance bleeds into our fourth point.
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4) DIFFICULTY WITH SOCIAL CUES. In one of his earlier conversations with Aventurine (where he is clearly irritated at how careless Aventurine seems to be about their entire mission), Ratio inadvertently insults Aventurine's his lack of education and parents. He apologizes afterwards, stating he did not intend to come across that way, but he maintains the same imperious tone of voice. Autistic people often, but not always, struggle with social cues and can often be considered rude when we are trying to be direct and easily understood; and we can especially struggle with understanding sarcasm or sounding sarcastic when we intend to be sincere.
With my reasons for believing Ratio to be Autistic coded firmly established, let's move onto why I think he is good representation. The two most important parts of representation, in my lived experience as an Autistic person, are RELATABILITY and EMPATHY.
Ratio exhibits some of the same mentalities and symptoms I've had, such as being misunderstood and accidentally offending people and becoming extremely stressed in large crowds due to overstimulation, so he checks off the first box. But the way that the other characters in the game respect him and do not ridicule him for his eccentricities marks the second. Whether in marketing material or in character dialogue options, Ratio's love of baths, his plaster bust, and his ceaseless drive to educate other people (whether they need it or not) are seen as charming and generally positive, and those attributes are not constantly brought up (and mocked) in his interactions and dialogue with other characters. Aventurine doesn't constantly ask Ratio if he needs to leave the Dream to take a bath, and the TB's text conversations with him allow you to engage with his special interests such as his requests for problems to solve and debates to wage against you. He is canonically seen and respected as a brilliant individual, and not reduced to a joke or viewed as comic relief (e.g. Sampo, who almost exclusively is given negative dialogue options for the player to use when interacting with him and who almost every character in the story openly despises.)
Some of you are going to disagree with me in the comments (which is fine, it's my opinion), but for the few of you who read this all the way through, thank you. I hope that this helps you view Ratio and Autistic people overall in a new light, and I am excited to see where else we go from here with him and the rest of the cast!
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littledigest · 2 years
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Astro Observation: Commonalities in Serial Killer charts
DISCLAIMER: Any aspects, placements, signs, etc. that I mention here on out do not mean that people with one or all of these are, will become, or will act out serial killer tendencies. I am merely finding common aspects and placements in famous serial killers' charts to delve deeper into the reasons for their actions. As always, one aspect can be expressed in so many different ways. So, take everything with a grain of salt.
Subjects:
Ted Bundy 11/24/1946
Pedro Lopez 10/8/1948
John Wayne Gacy 3/17/1942
Harold Shipman 1/14/1946
Jeffrey Dahmer 5/21/1960
Charles Manson 11/12/1934
David Berkowitz 6/1/1953
Richard Ramirez 2/29/1960
Aileen Wuornos 2/29/1956
If we break down each person's chart by only personal planets, what sign comes up the most often?
Scorpio and Gemini are the signs that came up most frequently. Every serial killer in my list has Scorpio or Gemini in their charts except for Richard Ramirez and Aileen Wuornos.
Scorpio is not a big surprise since this is the sign ruled by Pluto. Death, taboo subjects, obsession, fascination with darker sides of life, control, and power are all very Scorpionic and Plutonian themes. Negative Scorpio traits include being vengeful, manipulative, aggressive, and insensitive. They have innate seductive energy that lures people in as well.
Gemini is a bit more surprising. However, Geminis are curious, clever, impulsive, moody, and good with words. They like to know private information about other people. They are also social creatures, so if they are lacking social connection, things can go south for them. Or, they can use their social skills to lure others to them. The duality of Geminis could go to the extremes; two different personalities in one.
The next most frequent sign is Aquarius. Richard Ramirez and Aileen Wuornos have Aquarius in their charts.
Not a huge surprise with Aquarius. Negative Aquarius energy could mean detachment from emotions, lack of empathy, extreme rebelliousness, pessimism, and coldness. They can be unpredictable and have a superiority complex as well.
The sign that did not appear at all among personal planets is Leo. Taurus and Cancer come in a close second with only one each.
By modality? Not much difference here, but Mutable signs are in the lead. Mutable (17), Fixed (14), Cardinal (13)
By element? Air and Water came up the most with 15 and 13 respectively. Fire and Earth tied at 8 each.
Most common aspect?
Neptune - Pluto (8/9)
This is a generational aspect so 8 out of the 9 have Neptune sextile Pluto, except for Charles Manson. This aspect lasts from the 1940s to the 2030s (Charles Manson was born earlier in 1934). Because this aspect includes such a wide range of people, it does not have a huge effect on our serial killer study. I also do not know their birth times, so I do not even know which houses Neptune and Pluto land in their charts.
Venus - Mars (7/9)
Venus-Mars aspects are typically seen as attractive aspects since they join the planet of love, beauty, and sensuality with the planet of action, physicality, and aggression. From a negative perspective, Venus-Mars can also mean a love for aggression, sexual frustration, and an imbalance between wanting to be accepted/acceptable and wanting to act out in self-interest. May want love and affection, but either in an unconventional way or a part of them fights against or feels uncomfortable with this desire. (Ted Bundy and Jeffrey Dahmer are the only two who do not have this aspect; Ted Bundy was known to be attractive to a lot of people and had a certain charm; he does has Venus square Pluto.)
Moon - Uranus (7/9)
Once again, because I do not know birth times, the Moon placements are not accurate. However, I still thought this might be good to look at since there are so many of them. Moon-Uranus gives an unpredictable and disruptive nature to emotions. Their emotional lives may feel unstable, and strong emotions may rise suddenly. They could be rebellious and may feel restless frequently; may desire to separate themselves from others. Childhood could have been unstable/unaffectionate, and these people could lack slow, routine comfort. (John Wayne Gacy and David Berkowitz are the only two who do not have this aspect; David Berkowitz does have Aquarius Moon, which is different from Moon-Uranus but could give a similar flavor)
Sun - Saturn (6/9)
There is self-restricting energy that comes with Sun-Saturn aspects. In a negative light, this aspect shows seriousness, self-denial, lacking a strong sense of self, insecurity, and taking yourself too seriously. This could also show that people deny the Sun-Saturn people their self-expression and acceptance. (Pedro Lopez, Jeffrey Dahmer, and David Berkowitz are the only three who do not have this aspect)
Mars - Neptune (6/9)
Mars-Neptune can be spiritual, elusive, sensitive, imaginative, and dependent. In the realm of serial killers, spirituality can be taken to the extreme; think cult activity, believing a higher power is making you do bad things, etc. (Charles Manson has Mars conjunct Neptune, and David Berkowitz has Mars trine Neptune.) Serial killers can blend in and play in the shadows too, which is Neptunian. They can also assume a different persona, act like a completely different person. Many of these killers were seen as sensitive, shy, and/or polite during the day or in childhood. They can be impressionable; could have been heavily affected by their childhood environments, and acted out physically by imitation or by lashing out. (Pedro Lopez, Harold Shipman, and Jeffrey Dahmer are the only three that do not have this aspect.)
The most aspected planets are in this order:
Saturn (47)
Neptune (46)
Pluto (46)
Moon (46; birth times not accurate)
Mars (44)
Jupiter (42)
Venus (37)
Chiron (36)
Uranus (35)
Mercury (34)
Sun (32)
North Node (21)
South Node (20)
Closing Thoughts
When it comes to serial killers, I see two trains of thought. There is an intense fight between two opposing sides in one person. There is also an extreme detachment from themselves and other people. Saturn is the most aspected planet among these 9 charts, which speaks volumes astrologically about what can push someone to that level of violence and anger. Control, denial, and detachment are huge themes. There is absolutely no excuse for these serial killers and what they did to their victims and the victims' families and loved ones. But it is important to know that most, if not all of them, were denied love and affection in childhood. They were controlled or neglected by authority figures, whether or not this was perceived or for real. And they developed the ability to detach from themselves and other people. They then exert control over their victims and literally deny them their lives. During the act, they detach from any societal morals and ethics and any part of themselves that could possibly say that they shouldn't go through with their violent thoughts.
When there is discomfort within one's self, it builds up and, over time, this pent-up frustration and anger has to come out somehow. This is oftentimes through aggression (Mars) that is ignited by strong emotions (Moon). Serial killers take this to another level (violence, violent emotions)
It is also interesting to see Jupiter within the top half of the list. Serial killers tend to have strong ideologies/principles about the world, people, and everything that is wrong with both. This can also show an urge to expand and inflict their ideologies onto other people.
This is my little "study" on some famous serial killers. Kind of creeping me out right now so...
Everyone, take care of yourselves and be safe!!!
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colorbby · 2 years
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✧ who is your future s/o? first meeting & impressions ✧
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✧ PILE 1 ✧
hello pile 1!! hope you’re doing good!! enjoy your reading and feel free to leave some feedback!💌
personality: for your pile im getting BIG BIG go getter energy. this is someone who is very young spirited at heart and fully believes in themselves and their capabilities. they might come off as immature to an untrained eye but they are the definition of ‘golden retriever energy’ with a lot of hidden depth. these people might be constantly on the go as they’re possibly, trying to escape their own thoughts. im getting a mixture of the signs: aries/ gemini. extremely well looked upon within their respective community but at the same time, not necessarily truly known by people. they are confident as f*ck!! so i said aries and gemini earlier but really im sensing a sagittarius. these people have big philosophies and probably only indulge in a “real”/ not so surface level conversation, if they feel like you are on their level intellectually. i know that sounds really cocky but i perceive this person as someone who wants to be able to learn from the people they interact with. they are very passionate people, even in their speech.. so they perceive engaging in such conversations as some form of intimacy. meaning, not granted to just anybody. okay low key, they might have some scorpio placements as well. in general, they’re really self aware and know what sides of themselves to show and which ones to (rightfully so) keep to themselves. they may however be the type of person that is constantly plagued with negative thoughts or very prone to overthinking. matching the assessment of the sign sagittarius (ruled by jupiter) these individuals are constantly looking to grow and be better than they were the day before. they may have also struggled with lower self esteem in the past or in their adolescent years.
first meeting: so.... i feel like this is SO cliché but they might purposefully ignore you/ their attention might be on literally anything else before you randomly catch their attention. i don’t necessarily feel like this has to be a work environment but i feel like when you two first “meet” you will be watching them work on something. and it’s something they’ll be doing with their hands. im also kinda seeing a scenario where someone is helping someone out. so this may be like some volunteer work or you might go to a flea market or something similar and they’re there helping different people set stuff up.. something like that. but they will definitely notice you by the end. i also don’t sense that any words will be spoken between you two, just glances and maybe smiles. so sadly, it won’t be a proper meeting where names etc. get exchanged.  
their first impression of you/ thoughts about you: this is hilarious tbh... i see that you come off almost the same way to them? very disinterested and like you don’t wanna be there LMAO and perhaps you don’t, like fair enough. you might have strong earth specifically capricorn placements/ 10H (=10th house) placements. it’s giving very much, im here for business only no pleasure lmaoo. yeah so that sums it up pretty much, they think you look intimidating or rather, they might just be intimidated. 
possible physical features/vibes: soo i am already sensing that this person may have more of that feminine energy to them. they might be like a libra or pisces rising as well. that droopy/sad eye look, might be something that stands out about them. they could be of average height/ not too much taller than you. they have massive arms though.. so this person might frequent the gym or literally only works out their arms lmao. guaranteed: RBF.. idk just getting pretty face vibes tbh... like you’ll love the way their face looks. 
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✧ PILE 2 ✧
hello pile 2!! this was a really fun reading to do so enjoy, feel free to leave me some feedback as well!! 💌 tw// brief mentions of depression
personality: okay so right away.. this person definitely just came out of a huge funk. like im seeing someone was depressed, borderline didn’t wanna be here.. and they somehow kinda made it through and now they’re like so excited? almost like they got a second chance at life. i literally feel like jumping up and down and whilst shuffling, even though im a singer, i couldn’t stop humming and making random noises!! (also they might love music more than the average person.. could feel like their fav artist/music actually saved them.) this person could also be extremely spiritual or as a result of what happened they may have become such. so they definitely practice things like mindfulness etc. so im getting that they’re more on the introverted side.. im hearing the sign cancer, and just generally more of a.. ‘i only hang out with my closest ppl vibes.’ like you know those people whom you only ever see outside WITH their group of friends?? they’re like that. super loyal too. they are extremely hard working people i see. the type of people whom are very humble and don’t go brag about their wins (although they could and def should sometimes.) like they’ll transform their lives, silently working on their stuff for months or even years and by the time people notice they’re like: “yeah.. i did that :)” just very unbothered about things like status and fame etc. they just want the best for the people around them and obviously for themselves. im also getting that they may not look it, but have extremely high standards lol. because they know if the shoe was on the other foot, they would match the other person’s criteria. they’re so cool, idk i like them. also they’re veeery just. hate any type of injustice and will literally start  heavy debates over anything they deem as mistreatment. i could definitely also see this person being a part of the lgbtqia+ community! 
first meeting: so idk whats up with these supposed first meetings... but similarly to pile 1, this is another meeting where there aren’t any proper greetings exchanged. something about it will feel rushed and like a movie. like im seriously sensing something out of a modern rom com or something. like someone getting on a train and kinda “falling for a stranger” and when that person gets off, the other person will rush to get off but won’t make it in time? something like that. and i hate giving out these type of descriptions because... knowing most people who read tarot will start romanticising minor interactions with randoms on the train LMAO (im most ppl).. but i guess it’s prone to happen to one of you, if im channeling it. so whomever you are, im happy for you!! there will definitely be a second meeting that will follow, and this interaction will kinda be the gateway for the proper introduction. “hey didn’t i see you on train 7 on it’s way to *fill in blank* a couple weeks ago? “oh my god.. wait that was you!!” something like that. honestly ugh… im jealous LMAO.
⚠️ this goes without saying, but still, be careful with anyone who approaches you in public and use your discernment/listen to your intuition!⚠️
their first impression/ thoughts about you: the cards speak for themselves lolllll... the lovers card, 9 of pentacles, 10 of pentacles, the devil, strength, 4 of swords and bottom of the deck, the empress... from these cards im getting, perhaps this person was the one who *in the above mentioned scenario* took the initiative but was initially unsure about it. it’s giving their intuition told them to approach you and so even whilst hesitant, they did. they think that you’re beautiful not just physically but just the way you carry yourself, your aura.. all of it speaks to them. i literally see someone just getting lost in someone else, whilst looking at them. low key stalker vibes so beware!! just kidding, but they might have like a pisces venus or something, as it’s giving: love at first sight. but that’s honestly all, i don’t think they have any further or deeper concerns other than: “how do i get to this person??...” and “they’re beautiful”
possible physical features/vibes: okay so don’t shoot the messenger, but either their looks are just average or maybe you’re not supposed to know/seek information on what they look like.. because all i got was that they’re extremely tall and perhaps skinny.. or skinnier than what you’re used to (?) i feel like with this person looks don’t matter idk. take as it resonates friends (:
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✧ PILE 3 ✧
hi ppl who chose pile 3!! this was one of my favorite readings to do, so i hope you enjoy it! leave me some feeback if you like!! 💌
personality: for pile 3... okay so not to steal your person or whatever but they’re fine as f*ck. like right away, they have that type of personality or chat/banter, that could make anyone fold. im sensing big scorpio energy possibly matched with some libra. so they can talk the talk. i know this isn’t necessarily their personality but something about them is super sensual and deep... might be a taurus somewhere as well. they’re just fine asf DAMN!!! okay.. i think they really enjoy socializing but... make it “mature” you know?? lol so instead of going clubbing (nothing wrong with clubbing) they prefer to sit in a bar and socialize with people there.. for my Jujutsu Kaisen fans, imagine the character Nanami at a bar. it’s exactly that type of vibe LMAO. they could also enjoy traveling a lot however, they are definitely a homebody. they’re the type to happily cook for themselves or if they see a dish somewhere that looks good to them, they won’t ask what it’s called but rather secretly try to look it up and try to imitate it. they might be someone who enjoy’s having little frivolous secrets.. (big scorpio/ taurus vibes like i said lol)  im definitely sensing bachelor vibes, they might have a typical bachelor pad if they’re a man... super clean home, fine aesthetics etc. they are also definitely sought after by others and people easily see their worth (as fcked up as that sounds) they appear to be someone of quality. i know that wasn’t so much on their personality and more-so their vibe, but the cards and my intuition wouldn’t tell me anything else. “if you’re lucky you’ll find out soon enough” chileeee... i want them! but happy for you! <3
first meeting: okaaay finally something exciting!! no shade to the other piles lol. so im seeing that this meeting will happen at a party!! now if you’re someone who doesn’t go to parties or doesn’t get invited, whatever the case.. this will be a party that you’ll have to attend. could be a work party or something as well... but i am seeing people being really relaxed and enjoying their time so... maybe not lol. so im also getting that you will look extremely beautiful to them.. im hearing “just how i like it” LOL... so you might have put on some kind of perfume or your best shoes etc. but you will look better than you do on your average days. this person will definitely make the first move. im seeing them seeing you from across the room or wherever this is located, and figuring out how exactly to approach you. shocker, they will shower you in really well timed, well mannered compliments. like im literally getting someone being so calculated, in a good way, and knowing exactly when to say something and how to say it. they’re sooo smooth my god! and more importantly, i see you being very comfortable in their presence! like you might initially think “why are they approaching me?” once you see them making their way over.. but once you’re actually around them you’ll feel comfortable to be yourself. which we love to see! they might be exactly what you asked for at some point or vice versa.. i see someone being like.. “what.. no way that worked” talking about some kind of manifestation... they might confess that they’re actually interested in you, or you two might exchange numbers etc. i just see this first meeting ending “successfully”. 
their first impression/ thoughts about you: so in that moment you might honestly look like you’re fighting for your life lol. not literally, but your body language or facial expressions might come off as though you don’t want to be there or aren’t really enjoying the company you’re in, at that moment. so im seeing two scenarios.. you might stick around with that group of people and look uncomfortable until your future s/o approaches you and kinda guides you away from them, or you might leave that group of people, seek your own company and look really good doing it. but initially they might think you don’t want to be there as you might look kinda sad too. i also feel as though this person thinks you fit their perfect ideal, physically? which kinda matches the “just how i like it” part of the reading earlier.. you might also kinda resemble their ex or something.. seems to me that this person knows what they like.
possible physical features/vibes: instantly im getting the word “provider”... so whatever you envision when you hear that word, could possibly help you identify this individual, as to each their own. they like to put effort into their outfits and looks. likes to accessorize. yet they prefer to keep their outfits practical?? so no maximalism fashion trends or anything like that. could also be the case that they’ve never dyed their hair etc. something about them seems simple. “simple but effective” im hearing. i think they like form fitted clothes and they enjoy showing off parts of their body. they’re just sexy y’all idk what to say. oh and they could also be wearing glasses, especially when you first meet them!
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✰ let me know if any of this resonates with some feedback through my submission box! ✰
✰ j ✰
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scruffyplayssonic · 8 months
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Are the ArchieSonic comics actually an 80's/90's syndicated cartoon? Episode 51: Villains team up (part 1)
Welcome back to my look at the ArchieSonic comic series, and how it shared a lot of the same story tropes as a typical ‘80s or ‘90s syndicated cartoon! For today’s episode, I’d like to focus on the bad guys.
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…no, not those ones. This is an ArchieSonic blog series, not IDWSonic.
Episode 51: Villains team up 
I mean hey, all the best cartoons have extremely memorable episodes where the villains join forces. Darkwing Duck had “Just Us Justice Ducks.” DuckTales 2017 had “Glomtales.” Batman 1966 had Batman: The Movie (and if you want to tell me that the 60’s Batman series wasn’t a cartoon, I will strongly disagree with you on that. xD). So did ArchieSonic have any memorable villain team-ups? Actually yes, quite a few. Let’s start with the earliest example, shall we?
First up is one I’ve talked about before: Evil Sonic and Robo-Robotnik, who actually worked together a couple of times.
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The first instance was in Sonic #19, when Robo-Robotnik had conquered his own world and was out to destroy all other Sonics on all other worlds. Sonic rallied his counterparts from across the multiverse to face this threat, and in response Robo-Robotnik hired Evil Sonic to do his dirty work for him.
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Evil Sonic was sent to steal a relic called the Giant Hand, which Robo-Robotnik used to form the enormous Giant Borg.
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After the Giant Borg was destroyed by the legion of Sonics, each hedgehog took a piece of it with them back to their own dimensions to ensure that it could never be reassembled. Except that’s exactly what happened anyway a few years later in the Crossover Chaos super special. Robo-Robotnik, preparing to come out of the shadows and begin his conquest of Mobius Prime, once again came to Evil Sonic and asked him go dimension-hopping to gather all the pieces of the Giant Borg. Evil Sonic happily went along with this plan, except he accidentally took the pieces to the Robotnik of the Sonic Underground universe instead of Robo-Robotnik.
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Robo-Robotnik decided to just cut his losses and move forward with his other invasion plans, and Sonic Prime had to team up with the Underground trio to stop the Giant Borg once again.
Not long after Prime Robotnik’s defeat (seriously, only three issues later in Sonic #53), we got another villain team up when the wizard Ixis Naugus was introduced.
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Having just escaped from the Zone of Silence with the former royal warlord Kodos and a spider ninja called Uma Arachnis, Naugus was demanding his right to the throne because King Acorn had sworn fealty to him when they were trapped in the Zone of Silence together. Sonic managed to outsmart the wizard though and Naugus fled, leaving Kodos and Arachnis paralysed as crystal statues. 
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To be honest I’m not sure if this one counts as a villain team up, as Naugus and Arachnis were only introduced in this issue (although Naugus did get a name drop in an earlier issue) and Kodos had only been seen as part of King Acorn’s confused memories. So they weren’t exactly fully established villains at this point in the story, plus Kodos and Arachnis were mostly just acting as Naugus’ mooks. But I figured this one was worth mentioning as they both become more relevant later on.
Another very memorable team up from the 90s (and another one I’ve mentioned before) was when Enerjak and the Dark Legion were brought together for the first time in Knuckles #7. Enerjak was actually Dimitri, Knuckles’ great-uncle many generations removed, who centuries ago had tried to drain the Floating Island’s Chaos Emeralds of their powers to gently lower it back to the planet’s surface. However his Chaos Syphon had overloaded and filled him with the power of 11 Chaos Emeralds, immediately driving him mad with power and driving him to take over the world. He was defeated and buried inside a mountain for centuries until he broke out in the Knuckles mini-series and once again tried to take over the world. He was once again defeated and exiled to space - which seems extremely unlikely considering the power he wielded, but whatever. That brings us to the Dark Vengeance story arc, where Dimitri was mysteriously sent back to the Floating Island, appearing right in the middle of a Dark Legion meeting.
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The Dark Legion had been formed by Dimitri’s son Menniker in response to the ban on technology that had been imposed after Dimitri’s supposed demise, and so they were only too happy to swear loyalty to Enerjak after he revealed his identity to their current leader, Kragok.
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In very little time they had captured the Chaotix, Archimedes and his grandfather, Julie-Su, and Knuckles. Julie-Su was able to fast-talk her way into rejoining the Legion but felt conflicted about her loyalties now. The Chaotix were left to die in the desert, and Knuckles was disintegrated by Enerjak when he refused to join him.
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It’s okay, he got better. Enerjak seemed unstoppable, at least until Mammoth Mogul, the one who had magicked Enerjak back from space in the first place, appeared and stole Enerjak’s power for himself. The newly empowered “Master Mogul” had to be defeated by Super Sonic, Hyper Knuckles, and Turbo Tails.
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You know, I kind of miss this variant of Tails’ super form. I thought the red looked really good on him.
Our next villain team up is centred around the mass breakout of the dreaded prison, the Devil’s Gulag. In Sonic #62 Robo-Robotnik, who was still operating from the shadows in preparation for his full-scale re-taking of the planet, engineered a mass breakout of the prison right as Snively was boasting that he would escape.
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Nack the Weasel (now more commonly known as Fang the Hunter these days), Drago Wolf, Sleuth Dawgy Dawg and Mammoth Mogul’s former henchmen, the Fearsome Foursome, gleefully set about taking down their captors. Snively mostly hid in terror during the battle, but the other villains mistakenly thought that he was the one who had released them and decided he should be their new leader.
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They took the still-crystallised bodies of Kodos and Arachnis with them, which turned out to be very convenient as the two statues soon reverted to normal and joined Snively’s forces.
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Under Snively’s orders they kidnapped Nate Morgan, hoping to force him to make technology and weapons for them. Nate was however rescued by Geoffrey St. John’s Secret Service, with Sonic and Prince Elias tagging along to help.
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Most of the villains were recaptured although several escaped, and Snively was thought to have died in an explosion but had actually been captured by Robo-Robotnik.
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Kodos and Arachnis continued to work together after this story, collaborating to steal the Sword of Acorns. They would later turn on each other though, and both died from radiation poisoning they were exposed to while hiding out in Robotropolis. Well, technically Kodos didn’t die of the radiation, even though he was driven insane by it…
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This post has turned out a bit longer than I expected, so I think I'm going to have split it up. Next time, I'll be covering the villain team ups that happened during Ian Flynn's run on the ArchieSonic series. See you then!
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lawtistic · 1 year
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Bluestar's genetically accurate family tree
I have RULES i set up for myself, here.
1.) The top if the family tree are the only cats that will have their canon designs, given they are genetically possible. (ex: there were two ginger she-cats with blue eyes, and both ginger she cats and gingers with blue eyes are extremely rare, so i traded one or another out so they wouldn't have both.)
2.) I will try to maintain the cat's appearances to be as close to the books as possible.
3.) If I don't care enough, I don't care enough. If a character isn't major or a parent to a major character, I wont put any effort into making them as accurate to the books as possible. (Or make them at all.) This also goes for if it makes more sense or if im bored with a constant color palette as the generations go (and its within genetic accuracy)
Note: I could use my own bases, but I didnt feel like it, so i used bases made by the lovely spade craft instead :)
Note 2: I used generators, genetics calculators, as well as my own knowledge for this. For the generators and calculators I used, I used multiple of them to fact check. However, if any of my facts are still wrong, do let me know. I'm less confident in the eye colors, but those are less important to me.
Up to Bluestar:
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Rooktail and Daisytoe are at the top of the family tree, so their colors remain the same.
Flashnose is Daisytoe's sister, and due to the issue I mentioned above, she was changed. Flashnose was originally described as a soft she-cat with ginger fur, a white muzzle, and blue eyes. This is near genetically impossible, so I made her eyes amber, the most realistic eye color for an orange tabby.
Flashnose is the mother of Swiftbreeze, who we'll get to in Greystripe's family tree, so she wasn't included here.
While Daisytoe has grey spots, her base pelt is actually black. (Yes, black. It's not white, because she simply has large amounts of white spotting rather than a white base coat. White base coats are an extremely dominant gene and she would not have any spots if this were the case.) This is because grey (or rather, blue) cats are simply dilute black cats, and dilute is a recessive gene Rooktail doesn't have. Since Rooktail is also black, their kits, Goosefeather and Moonflower, were also black.
Since Daisytoe has a large amount of white spotting, this was also given to Goosefeather and Moonflower to a certain degree.
Stormtail is the top of his family tree, so he remains the same.
Moonflower, while not being visibly dilute, still has the dilute gene. Stormtail is grey/blue, which, as i mentioned earlier, means he's a diluted black cat. This means both of his kits can be diluted, and grey.
This is good for Bluestar, because she still looks accurate to her canon appearance, and is genetically accurate. However, Snowfur is not. She does not have enough white spotting to classify as white, and is diluted, so the black on her ears also couldn't be achieved.
Bluestar's kits
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As you can see, Oakheart looks VERY different, and I'll tell you why in a different post when I cover Crookedstar's family. They're finished already, I'm just waiting to post them.
Mistystar and Stonefur look more or less the same, but Mosskit looks different due to both Oakheart and Bluestar being blue cats. This left no room for any differing cats, meaning all of their kits look the same.
Spoilers for A Starless Clan under this !!
I don't feel like doing Mistystar's kits because they arent important enough for me to care about. Yes, this includes Reedwhisker. All of his importance reside in his death, he did nothing imporant while alive other than shout a couple of times, and the rest of Mistystar's kits are dead, anyways.
Blackclaw also isnt that important from my memory, so I don't care enough to go all the way back to Shimmerpelt and Piketooth just to make 3 dead kids and a smelly middle aged also dead man genetically accurate. Maybe I'll come back to them at some point (mostly for Reedwhisker) but that's only if I decide to do a lineup of all the gentically accurate RiverClan deputies, which is unlikely.
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manojkondreddyagri · 2 years
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Is Netflix Dead?
Netflix may be coming to its end. Netflix has stated that it has lost approximately a million subscribers. And the reasons for Netflix's Death are...
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I believe Netflix does not require any introduction, but I'd like to give you a brief.
Netflix is the world's leading premium entertainment service, with over 125 million members in over 190 countries watching TV shows, documentaries, and feature films in a variety of genres and languages.
However, since the post-pandemic, Netflix has lost thousands of customers, and recently, I mean yesterday, Netflix has stated that it has lost approximately a million subscribers across the United States and Europe.
Here are my explanations for Netflix's eventual downfall!!!
Paying directors millions of dollars to produce TV shows
Netflix is paying directors millions of dollars to create TV shows or to purchase films. Recently, Netflix set aside a budget of about $200 million for the film "The Gray Man," which was directed by the renowned Joe and Anthony Russo of "Avengers: infinity" and "Endgame." And this movie failed to live up to the expectations of the audience, making losses.
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This was merely one example. Netflix spends several million dollars annually making movies, TV shows, or purchasing the rights to a title.
BUT on the other hand, as I mentioned earlier, YouTube is more than just a social media or an OTT platform.
YouTube doesn't always pay for content, but even when it does, it still generates millions of dollars daily and millions of hours of viewing every hour.
This is the #1 cause of Netflix's losses and declining customer base.
No other source of income.
I previously explained why LG left the smartphone industry in an earlier post, stating that while they were producing innovative phones with good quality, sales were lacking, and eventually they started to lose money.
This was happening with Netflix.
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Don't put all of your eggs in one basket.
Netflix kept all of its eggs in one basket. However, we can see that some of their main rivals, including YouTube, Amazon Prime Video, Disney+ Hotstar, Zee5, Sony Liv, and Amazon Prime Video, have kept all of their eggs in different baskets.
For instance, if Amazon Prime Video suffered a loss, it could make up for it by selling goods on Amazon, AWS, Kindle, Audible, and other platforms.
The same applies to Hotstar, Zee5, and Sony Liv. Since all of these OTT services had TV channels like Star TV, Sony, and Zee, they could make up for any losses.
Netflix, on the other hand, only has one type of source, which is a subscription. Another source could be independent documentaries that Netflix paid to keep.
Follow me on Twitter, Reddit, and Facebook
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Prices are High
I don't know about other countries, but Netflix has very expensive prices, at least in India. A typical Netflix subscription costs Rs. 199, which is extremely expensive when compared to its rivals.
Okay, so it might not be a problem for some users, but when compared to Netflix, their rival's features and benefits are far superior.
Assume we have a basic plan. Rs.199 per month When it comes to Hotstar or Prime Video, the best plan is around 1500 and they offer 1080p, 4-5 devices at a time. Netflix only allows you to download and watch one device at a time and the video quality is SD (480p). Even Amazon Prime has additional benefits such as free delivery, Prime Reading, Prime Music, and more.
Netflix Losing Licensed Titles
Netflix became extremely popular with shows such as Friends and The Office, but according to reports, Netflix is losing licenses to these titles. This was another roadblock that Netflix needed to overcome. I believe these two are the evergreen watches (though I did not watch anyone😥).
Netflix has some less curated web series like Narcos, Money Heist, Squid Game, Stranger Things, and others, but Disney+ Hotstart has a larger library of Marvel Series, and HBO series like Game of Thrones, Europhia, Pixar, and much more.
I believe that businesses should keep a hook on their customers in order to keep them as repeat customers. I also got a Netflix subscription when Money Heist Season 6 was released, and I binge-watched the entire series beginning with Season 1 in a month.
Conclusion
These are my thoughts on why Netflix is losing customers. There are some common reasons, such as people having no time to watch after the pandemic ends and being preoccupied with their work, but these are my predictions based on their business model.
I hope you learned something from this. If YES, please like, share with your #Netflix Friends, and ask him not to cancel.
Follow me, and this was crucial for a new writer.
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melias-cimitiere · 3 years
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Careful with Interpretations
All of us walk about with our own mental operating system; this OS is not the same for all, surprisingly enough. You may already be aware of this when you’re trying to speak to someone, and they come across with a totally different interpretation of events. And I’m not talking about conspiracy theories here. Much more mundane things, explained away differently due to different educational, sociocultural backgrounds. Take for example someone trained as a sociologist, or psychologist. They see the world through “borrowed lenses” of those institutions that trained them, and over time, they make them their own.
So far, there’s no problem with that. It’s bound to happen, naturally. As long as we remember that there are multiple interpretations of these same events, it’s all good. Remember how in the past, medical doctors and psychiatrists used their own science in a most arrogant way to determine what is a human being, almost excluding the person in the process? To them, nerves were like cables, and the body was simply a machine. Modern medicine acknowledges a more holistic approach, having enough evidence of the effect of psychology and spirituality on certain conditions. Also, advances in science have shown the nerve cells to actually move and interface with others, making extremely complex processes in the way; so much more than “cables”. With these examples in mind, we should consider other disciplines, like history or archaeology. Like physicists, these types of scientists have also fallen prey to modern tactics of trying to appeal to common sentiment and using trivial expressions to reach out to the general public. In past decades, the effort was to educate the general public, instead of trying to reach out in this way; it only creates trivializing and shallowness, making it look like bad science. I still remember a documentary saying, “black holes are simply gravity gone mad”… what?!
Anyway, back to my point. I’ve seen plenty of examples of historians and archaeologists falling for these tactics. There is a problem here; whereas most people are unaware or uninterested in black holes, superstrings etc, when it comes to history and archaeology, there is a different mindset, because they supposedly show the historical Truth, based on empirical evidence. So far so good. But we have to remember that this empirical evidence is constantly updated and reevaluated, so some of what was originally thought as canon is later proved to be wrong. Remember that even in the 80s and the 90s (not to mention earlier years), the Mayans were considered to be ignorant of the Wheel? Until they discovered a child’s toy in a tomb, which was a horse with four wheels as legs…  They then said that there were no large roads or avenues in the Mayan civilization, and they tried to explain this on the fast-growing ecosystem that suffocate any such work. However, in recent years, the major discovery by modern scientific methods of the giant Mayan metropolis, along with two large roads, and a park, enrich our understanding. Similar things happen to Yonaguni monument in Japan, or the Sphinx in Egypt… I find it preposterous to say, even in the obvious evidence of examiners, that these monuments were sculpted by natural processes (two separate documentaries from “reputable sources” are out there in youtube; one showing the Yonaguni sculpted by sea and geological mineral processes… and the other showing the Sphinx sculpted by the…wind in the desert, and later customized by the Egyptians).
Why is it so difficult to embrace the fact that some ancient civilizations were extremely advanced? Sometimes we may not have an answer; I get that. But usually, when we have no answer, we end up lessening the impact, as if we are fearful to imply something mysterious or outside ordinary definitions. Why do we have to explain away the mystery in this manner? Honest scientists have confessed not knowing something; at least, at the time. There’s nothing wrong with not knowing something; it is part of the learning process, and it’s applied to everything. There are plenty of mysteries around; let me mention just a few. 
1.       Everyone knows that ziggurats were built by Mesopotamians, right? So what is that ziggurat doing inside a lake in China? Obviously, somebody with the know-how built it, or the Mesopotamians stretched much further (or migrated) than commonly thought possible.
2.       Who built the unusual ancient city in Siberia? It bears some semblance to some temples in Indonesia… but it’s thousands of miles away.
3.       The stone avenues found near Cuban waters, and in some parts of the Eastern Coast in America… someone was building roads with stone, at a time that everyone else in surrounding places were using wood only.
4.       The mysterious city in Asia Minor, currently excavated by German archaeologists, featuring strange pillars chiseled with animals facing downwards, towards the earth (each pillar has an animal). It is rather unique and it bears no connection to the well-established civilizations in the vicinity (Greeks, Egyptians, Phoenicians, and Hittites etc). It is rather inverted, almost as if it’s built to hold something…down.
5.       A plethora of Indian temples, one of which being Kailasa temple, hewn out of rock with such precision and detail that confound even modern engineers.
6.       Two alphabets, bearing a striking similarity, almost identical – but there’s a problem. One is in the Indus Valley, and the other in the Easter Island; they are literally half a planet away.
7.       The Maltese Hypogeum (underground temple) Hal Saflieni acoustics, something that has got many world specialists interested due to its particular configuration.
8.       Let’s not forget our old-time favorite, the pyramid of Cheops (and others as well). As most engineers can testify, there’s no problem building temples up to a certain height, but after certain limits have been exceeded, the entire procedure becomes untenable. Many preposterous ideas have been proposed for the construction of these giant monuments, but all of them have flaws; a ramp that would require an entire forest to be chopped down, rising higher and higher (and while doing so, extending its base more and more). Or another structure using hydraulics, to move up heavy loads that would require thick base walls like a hydroelectricity dam, equally untenable. And so on.
There are plenty of other examples, if someone actually looks out for them, and keeps an open mind. Science, like spirituality, is done best keeping an open mind.
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shihalyfie · 3 years
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You talk a lot about how the Digimon are born from the kids own souls, would you be interested into describing how the digimon partners reflect their humans' personalities?
Oh man, I love this topic! (You’ll have to forgive me in that my desire to do justice for it is why it ended up taking me this long to answer it.)
The part about the Digimon literally being part of the kids’ souls comes directly from official (it’s been mentioned several times, not only in what I just linked). This was never stated outright in the original Adventure or 02, and it took until Kizuna to really shove the link between the partner and the human’s inner self in your face and make it a huge part of the actual story, but fans had been catching onto it long before that, and even without reading what the staff had said. Kizuna throws a bit of a nail in this because it’s said to be a bit lore-noncompliant, but considering how much of the background lore it still goes out of its way to adhere to, and the fact it still does match the fundamental concept of “human heart = Digimon partner” regardless of detailed minutiae, we can still apply and analyze this concept with no problem, especially since Adventure and 02 always walked the line between sci-fi and fantasy, and there is undoubtedly a spiritual element to them no matter how you look at it.
(My personal comfort zone in analyzing Adventure and 02 comes moreso from a human behavior and mentality perspective, which is also why my meta on this blog tends to focus more on the human drama aspects of Adventure and 02 and especially the latter’s story being so heavily about human relationships, but if you’re interested in said spiritual elements, I heavily recommend @analyzingadventure‘s very comprehensive meta on Adventure background lore and themes, which also covers similar territory in detail. We’re different people, so our takes on it probably differ in some respects, but that’s the beauty of having different perspectives, after all.)
In any case, back to your question. I think it would be best to break this down piece-by-piece with the Adventure and 02 kids in detail, so more is under the cut!
...Well, okay, before we continue, I do want to touch on something briefly, and it’s regarding the fact that “evolution” in this series is generally a metaphor for human growth. That counts for when everyone gets their evolutions, but it also counts as a metaphor overall -- after all, Adventure is about self-assertion and pushing oneself as far as possible (the major evolution gimmick being tied to Crests), whereas 02 is about cultivating differing aspects of yourself and applying it to how you form relationships with others (the major evolution gimmick being tied to Digimentals and ultimately Jogress). The human self is quite a flexible thing, and the Digimon themselves quite often change personalities as they evolve. (I touched on this briefly in my discussion of honorfiics and first-person pronouns earlier, but in Japanese, the Digimon will often even change personalities and speech patterns as they evolve.) This also leads to a few other potential observations (not really corroborated by official, just my personal view of it):
Speaking from a meta perspective, the fact that only the “front protagonists” end up getting the highest level forms is pretty obviously so they don’t have to spend toy budget on allocating it to everyone, but from an in-story perspective, Adventure episode 50 adds an implication that not reaching as high of a form may also have to do with how inherently attuned one is to combat (Jou says that he believes that Gomamon will never reach Ultimate because he doesn’t have the sort of strength Taichi and Yamato do, and it contributes to his conclusion that his skills are more meaningfully applied as a healer instead of as a fighter). Of course, none of the Adventure or 02 cast is necessarily the belligerent type that inherently likes fighting in itself, but of course certain ones are less emotionally drained or more attuned to it, so you might be able to see a rough pattern there. (Again, I’m not going to sugarcoat how this still has a lot of dismaying issues on the meta level, but the difference between “how much this sucks on a meta level” and “whether this at least tracks in-story” is a common theme on this blog.) In a franchise sense, Digimon were of course conceptualized as fighting monsters, but within the narrative of Adventure, it probably stands to reason that having a manifested part of your soul or inner self shouldn’t necessarily mean they have to be fighting things all of the time unless it’s necessary.
It’s very often been pointed out that the 02 cast is at a sort of “combat disadvantage” compared to their seniors (well, and Takeru and Hikari, anyway) because their highest forms require two people/Digimon to be in play, so their overall combat power is rather low. My impression is that this is by design (and it’s a subversion of the usual expectation of shounen anime sequels where the sequel will often power creep everything to make the new guard outdo the first). That the 02 team is inherently dependent on each other for support, and to a degree far more than their seniors, is rather baked into its narrative, and moreover, from an in-story perspective, the 02 group doesn’t seem like the type to really care about being outflanked by their seniors (on the contrary, they’d probably take that as more proof that their seniors are amazing). Moreover, the forms you see their Digimon in most of the time tend towards the smaller Baby-level forms instead of the Child-level ones, and while this is partially due to plot logistics about being in the real world (and, admittedly, kind of inconsistently applied), it gives you a much stronger impression of the 02 kids and their partners in general being people who aren’t that individually imposing or strong and get more mileage out of flexibility and variety (see: the Digimentals and the huge number of lower-level forms the kids have access to).
With this kind of metaphor, I caution against taking it too literally as a 1:1 thing (especially since official has been generally quiet about it and there isn’t much in the series text itself to corroborate this), but I do think there is certainly some kind of relevance that’s worth thinking about.
Many people, including the official notes I just linked, refer to there being some Digimon partners that are "like-minded” with their partner, and some that are “opposite” in personality. This is roughly true, but I find this to be a very simplified description of the concept; it’s more like all Digimon partners are a reflection of the less easily exposed part of their human partner (and, most pertinently, the part that would allow them to express themselves in ways they wouldn’t normally), it’s just that the kids with more straightforward or less extreme personalities don’t have as much to hide or cover up in the first place, and so their partners come off as more “like-minded”. Even Urawa Megumi, voice of Iori and Armadimon (arguably one of the pairs of partners that seem “opposing” in personality), stated that she didn’t personally feel like the two characters are all that different, since humans have different sides to them, and Armadimon is functionally an expression of the side of Iori that isn’t apparent.
Because the Adventure narrative has the Digimon partners be linked to human mentality, this leads to the side effect that you won’t have a Digimon partner who ever truly denies the human partner (barring external factors like Evil Ring-induced brainwashing), which is something producer Seki Hiromi was quite insistent about. That said, this is a very Adventure and 02-specific thing, since other series go more into different angles about how one would approach partnership when this factor is not in play; half of Tamers’s drama regarding partners comes from the fact they are not necessarily mentally linked all of the time, and need to find a way to build a relationship by bridging that gap, and so non-Adventure universe entries are more freely able to explore the concepts of a Digimon partner more consciously entering conflict with their human partner. Well, that’s the beauty of having a multi-entry franchise, after all.
Taichi and Agumon
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Taichi and Agumon immediately jump to mind as the first among the “like-minded” pairs, especially since the series shows them so often in sync and chilling together. Taichi himself is a straightforward person, so it stands to reason that his straightforward personality would also lend to Agumon coming off as being rather much like him.
However, there is one slight difference between the two, and it’s that Agumon has a somewhat stronger sense of “easygoing chill” than Taichi does, right down to using the more polite boku first-person pronoun in contrast to Taichi’s more assertive ore. He also lacks Taichi’s penchant for mild insensitivity -- in fact, very unlike Taichi, he has an incredible amount of emotional insight (02 spends quite a bit of time in 02 episodes 32 and 46 to showing off Agumon as someone who makes up for all of his lack of intellectual understanding with emotional and borderline poetic insight). And, really, while Taichi is a bit surface-insensitive, and while he seems to be impulsive, he actually is a conscientious person and is trying his best in his own way, and he isn’t the kind of person who cares about societal things like seniority, and he demonstrates multiple times that he’s easygoing and chill, and so you can say that’s a part of Taichi as well. Remembering that a Digimon partner’s presence helps their own human partner grow, Agumon being so openly friendly helps Taichi maintain good relations with others without running afoul of them.
One of Agumon’s most famous traits is that he likes food, which is not actually something that was in the original Adventure or 02 all that much but has been somewhat exaggerated since. That said, back in Adventure, while it was established that all Digimon regularly need food in order to maintain their evolutions, Agumon would usually be the first to complain “I’m hungry,” and whenever they did get food, Agumon would be one of the most prominently enjoying it. Food is, after all, one of the simplest and most universal of pleasures, and there’s a lot of visual framing of Taichi chowing down just as ravenously as Agumon is -- so, honestly, he probably got it from him.
Taichi also speaks a bit about his pain of being separated from Agumon in the space between Adventure and 02, and he directly refers to Agumon as “the other me”. The word “partner” was not actually used very much in the original Adventure or 02, and Taichi is not able to fully elucidate the sentiment of Agumon’s connection to his own self, but he still understands this much and why the loss cuts him so deeply, and by the time we get to Kizuna, it’s presumably why he uses similar language in his thesis proposal to refer to him. (I already covered the circumstances of Agumon’s relationship to Taichi’s existential crisis in Kizuna and how it led to their separation earlier, so I will omit it here for the sake of avoiding redundancy.)
Yamato and Gabumon
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This might surprise some people to hear, but I would also pin this as one of the more ostensibly “like-minded” pairs. Gabumon is shy on the surface, but turns out to be quite passionate -- he uses the same assertive ore as Yamato, in contrast to Agumon’s boku, and he demonstrates his capacity for passion and action in that he’s arguably one of the most assertive in the cast. Note his taking initiative against Yamato’s frostbite in Adventure episode 9, or declaring his intent to stay with Yamato even if it means going against the others in Adventure episode 44, or singlehandedly dragging Yamato out of the hole of darkness in Adventure episode 51.
And, of course, Yamato himself is someone who initially seems a little awkward or detached around everyone, but is actually very passionate, so that’s all the same. And because Gabumon himself is so open about communicating with the otherwise closed-in Yamato, Yamato is able to express himself better over the course of Adventure.
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Funny thing about that “shyness”, too -- the idea of Gabumon being particularly shy isn’t present in 02 much at all (we don’t get to see him very much, so it’s hard to say whether it’s completely gone, but it’s at least gone enough for the duration of his appearances). Which is funny, considering: guess who else stopped being shy and became naturally outgoing in 02? Yeah, so, as much as you might hear people (even official!) claim that the Digimon are static while their partners change, that’s not completely true -- the Digimon themselves develop in personality in the same way their human partners do. It’s just more subtle and less drastic, since they’re representing an abstract single part of their personality rather than being an exact match.
Sora and Piyomon
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Sora and Piyomon have an interesting relationship in that they’re the only one where their relationship started off on a note of conflict -- mainly in that Sora was very put off by Piyomon at first and even looked down condescendingly on her (well, only for the duration of a single episode). In fact, Sora’s own surface behavior is very different from the kind and caring Sora we know -- Sora dislikes associating with the clingy and affectionate Piyomon for being “mushy”, and even declares that she doesn’t want to “take responsibility” for lugging her around.
Of course, Sora’s character arc later revolves around the fact that she has abysmally bad self-awareness and doesn’t even realize that she has a compulsive sense of responsibility to others. So Sora is affectionate and loving -- she just puts up a front of trying to act a little above that (well, at least, during this part of the series) and doesn’t even see herself as someone capable of being like that (again, purely during this part of the series).
Piyomon is also interesting in that she has one of the most dramatic personality shifts even as early as Child to Adult, where she suddenly switches from the casual atashi to watashi (sometimes even kono watashi, which is super regal), and becomes incredibly dignified and regal even as Birdramon, and you can certainly see why Sora immediately started taking her seriously thereafter. It also begs a lot to think about, considering Sora’s very convoluted character and the many layers of herself that even she isn’t consciously aware of.
The way Piyomon helped Sora shift her own mentality is pretty directly handed to you on a plate in Adventure episode 26 -- because Piyomon played the role of Sora in the metaphor of Sora’s behavior towards Piyomon correlated to Toshiko’s behavior towards Sora, Sora was able to re-adjust her position relative to her family and consider her both someone capable of love, and someone who is loved.
Koushirou and Tentomon
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Koushirou and Tentomon are another pair that initially seem like they’re opposing types, with Koushirou being constantly curious and Tentomon being comparatively simple-minded, but the first key to figuring out where the similarity is ends up being a bit deceptive -- Tentomon says in Adventure episode 5 that he’s not particularly interested in himself. And, certainly, Koushirou is interested in Tentomon, but he, too, is not interested in himself -- in fact, he considers himself to be a topic he’d rather avoid instead of looking into everything else.
As far as language goes, while Tentomon does also use the stereotypically easygoing Kansai dialect, he also specifically uses the polite form, mirroring Koushirou’s own perpetual use of polite language. But unlike Koushirou, who uses it to keep distance from others, Tentomon is in fact very sociable, and is even portrayed as a Digimon who’s conscientious of others and “takes care” of them. And because Tentomon is so openly friendly, he manages to coax Koushirou out of his shell and allow him to think about more complicated things related to his own position in the world that he’d been avoiding.
As Koushirou’s character arc proceeds, we learn that he’s polite not only out of distance but also because he really is a very kind person, and moreover that he does eventually want to open up to others. And the payoff for this eventually comes in 02...
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...when he ends up becoming one of the most visible members of the older Adventure cast to appear in the series, checking in on the younger kids and developing into someone capable of organizing and managing people. Hmm, seems familiar.
Mimi and Palmon
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This one’s an easy one. Mimi is possibly the most straightforward person in the original Adventure cast -- well, that’s the point of her Crest after all -- and so Palmon is almost exactly like her, being a cheerful type who loves being cute. Any contrast between them is only really apparent in the very early episodes of the series, and that’s not even a contrast in theory as much as it’s just something that might intrigue audiences at first when Mimi spent a lot of those episodes complaining, but that’s also mostly because she was heavily under stress, and otherwise Mimi has always been kind and cheerful and indulgent in being cute.
Perhaps the only real difference is that Palmon, being a plant, is more willing to get involved with dirt and other things that Mimi ostensibly would rather not, but as the series progresses, Mimi manages to gain a higher sense of tolerance and get past her initial sense of materialism (which is something she’d had the capacity for the whole time).
Jou and Gomamon
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Of the Adventure pairs, this one is probably the one that seems like the biggest contrast on its face, with the overly high-strung and constantly stressed Jou, and the more playful and relaxed Gomamon.
In the end, Jou is someone who’s defined by his desire to support others, and even admits at the end of the series that he’s better suited for a support role than for fighting, and that there’s nothing wrong with that as long as he continues to channel his desire to help people in a way he’s most comfortable with. So, in the end, he’s not actually an inherently aggressive type. And, meanwhile, Gomamon is the kind who’s constantly looking out for Jou, to the point of knowing (such as in Adventure episode 7) when he’s about to do something phenomenally stupid and minding him so that nothing bad happens to him, and so, this is probably why they’re ultimately able to settle down and end the series eye-to-eye (or perhaps hand-to-hand).
And, again, recall that Digimon partners generally reflect a part that’s vital to their own human partner’s growth; considering that Jou is most certainly one of the more extreme personalities in this cast, you get the feeling that he probably needs someone this chill to keep his massive stress tendencies in check.
Takeru and Patamon
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Takeru and Patamon are an interesting case largely due to the two of them being so present for a whole two series. In Adventure, both of them seem to be largely like-minded, being playful, innocent, and childish -- although Patamon is more open about expressing the childishness that Takeru keeps trying to cover up. Patamon being roughly on the same playing field (no pun intended) as Takeru means that Takeru has someone he’s willing to be open with and let himself loose a little (such as in Adventure episode 12), because for the first half of the series, he’s almost entirely in the presence of elders and stifling himself for the sake of being “well-behaved”, and it starts his long journey of being able to understand his position and his actual sense of emotions over the course of Adventure and 02.
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Patamon also has a striking personality change upon evolving, becoming the regal and dignified Angemon, and, interestingly, his appearances have a very “knight templar” vibe where he takes a no-compromise stance against dark forces and states that he’ll condemn all of them to oblivion. This is a stance that’s unnervingly similar to Takeru’s own no-compromise stance against the darkness in 02, and it’s interesting in that Takeru himself had been advocating for pacifism in Adventure episode 12, but this incident traumatized him enough to start taking a position that more resembled Angemon’s.
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As we go into 02, Takeru’s contrast with Patamon initially seems like an increased mismatch, since Patamon is still ostensibly childish and playful while Takeru is ostensibly more mature. But for one, Takeru’s character arc is about the fact that he’s still pretending he’s more in control of his emotions than he actually is, and in some way you can also glean that there’s a sort of naivete present in his character that he keeps covering up with confident smiles. Patamon, for his part, does actually seem to have adopted a bit of a mentor role to the other Digimon, and we also learn that he’s capable of deliberately trolling people instead of just being generically playful -- much like Takeru himself, who’s a bit evasive and not entirely honest.
We do actually see Patamon reach HolyAngemon in 02 episode 34, but it doesn’t work out well, and while this is partially for plot mechanic reasons, it also says a lot that the “knight templar” stance that both Takeru and HolyAngemon have, with the full depth of no-compromise, isn’t going anywhere, and in the end, something more effective is only possible when Shakkoumon appears in 02 episodes 36-37 -- that is, Takeru is only able to better move on with Iori’s support.
Hikari and Tailmon
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Hikari is the only of the Tokyo Chosen Children to have a Digimon who “defaults” to Adult instead of Child or lower, and it means that Tailmon herself comes with a certain amount of maturity -- on top of having been become a bit hardened due to her experiences being isolated. This is an ostensible contrast to the more pure-hearted and innocent Hikari, but note that Hikari’s own will can be pretty assertive when it comes down to it. On top of that, as much as Tailmon is a bit standoffish, Hikari is also “emotionally isolated” -- she has trouble vocalizing her negative feelings, and it’s difficult for anyone in Adventure or the first half of 02 to truly connect with her internal thoughts. Recalling that the Digimon partner reflects a side of the human partner that’s less easily exposed and allows the human partner to grow in ways they wouldn’t before, Tailmon’s sheer presence gives Hikari a route to action in ways she probably wouldn’t have beforehand.
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In 02, Hikari becomes a little more mischievous and playful, and Tailmon also becomes a bit more willing to indulge (she even switches first-person pronouns in sync with Hikari, going from the more polite watashi to the more casual atashi). Both of them are now more able to enjoy themselves more openly. That said, Tailmon still has a certain degree of stuffy personal pride (she snarks at everyone quite easily for fussing over snacks in 02 episode 3), and Hikari herself remains emotionally elusive and repressive at the start of this series.
Tailmon evolves temporarily to Angewomon in 02 episode 13, which is the first time anyone (in this case, Takeru) makes some degree of headway to reaching out to her and allowing her to open up a bit more, but it’s not until 02 episode 31 when Hikari is fully reached out to via Miyako, which marks the first appearance of Silphymon.
Daisuke and V-mon
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Now here’s a very like-minded pair, even more so than Taichi and Agumon -- and, after all, Daisuke is simple-minded, so painfully simple-minded that he’s practically incapable of hiding anything, and so V-mon is almost exactly like him, down to using the same ore pronoun and being feisty and mischievous (a point is also made that he plays soccer with Daisuke, something that Agumon didn’t necessarily do with Taichi), and, heck, in a rare show of Digimon-Digimon crushes, has a crush on Tailmon in the exact same way Daisuke has on Hikari. (By the time we get to Kizuna and its higher animation budget, a lot of attention is paid to having even their body language mirror each other.)
There is only one real functional difference between the two in disposition, and it’s that V-mon is very straightforward, friendly, and kind, without being prone to getting angry or spiteful at anyone, and in the end, it’s indicative of the fact that Daisuke’s tendency to lash out defensively at everyone is just a front -- at his core, he’s friendly, supportive, and kind. Daisuke’s experiences and banter with V-mon contribute to him getting the sort of validation he needed without having to worry about being on edge or lash out defensively, and because of that, he was able to form a healthier and more supportive relationship with the rest of the group.
Miyako and Hawkmon
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This one seems to be a contrast right off the bat -- Miyako is bubbly, over-the-top, and rather messy and lacking in restraint, whereas Hawkmon is formal, graceful, and polite. But Hawkmon’s most prominent trait is his absolute loyalty and devotion to Miyako -- he’s very often referred to by both official staff and fans as her “knight” -- and is constantly minding her to protect her and make sure she doesn’t go over her head (most prominently, 02 episode 18). And as far as Miyako’s relationship to others goes -- she’s also devotedly loyal to everyone she loves and is constantly going out of her way to help others, and her character arc in itself is about the fact she wants to do her best to reach out to people and help emotionally support them in the best way she can, and Hawkmon managing to channel that to its utmost extent to Miyako in turn (in a very “who watches the watchman?” sense) allows her to regain her bearings and have better control over herself in the aftermath of 02 episode 18.
On top of that, as the series proceeds, it turns out that Hawkmon also shares Miyako’s penchant for dramatic theatrics and being a bit over his head -- even if he seemingly has himself more together than Miyako does, he’s not completely above it all...
Miyako is also the franchise’s first example of a female character with a masculine Digimon partner, and while Miyako herself openly identifies with and indulges in all things hyper-feminine, she also has zero issue engaging in more masculine-associated things as they suit her -- most prominently her Digital World outfit, and the fact she often displays a rather aggressive go-getter and hot-blooded/in-your-face personality that would not be out of place on a male shounen hero in a more conventional show. (Although, as much as these have generally been on the thread of “less visible aspects”, it’s not like this was that less visible of an aspect of her to begin with...)
Iori and Armadimon
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Iori and Armadimon hold the honor of being the only pair in the Tokyo Chosen Children to be voiced by the same voice actress (Urawa Megumi), driving the parallel down even further. And while their surface temperaments seem different, with Iori being rather uptight and strict on himself while Armadimon is laid-back, carefree, and even somewhat assertive, they’re not that different -- Armadimon is basically the curious, impressionable, somewhat childish spirit that Iori would be if he weren’t constantly holding himself back. (There’s a lot to be said about Submarimon going out of his way to take Iori for a ride in 02 episode 16 so that Iori can finally properly enjoy himself for once.)
Iori takes a lot of very stubborn, no-compromise positions over the course of 02, but Armadimon asking just the right kinds of questions allows him to “snap out of it” and be a little more receptive to considering alternatives, or at least taking into account more emotionally-oriented issues he’s dealing with. You can say that Armadimon (especially as Upamon) softening Iori up a bit -- since Iori will never be cold or unforgiving towards his partner, no matter what -- serves as a precursor to Iori starting to question the limitations of his black-and-white view of morality, which allows him to successfully break through to Takeru and fill out the rest of his character arc.
Ken and Wormmon
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Considering how much of the plot revolved around this one, this one almost goes entirely without saying! During Ken’s stint as the Kaiser, Wormmon represents the heart that Ken’s not entirely willing to leave behind -- and, also, the affection that he’s still craving from his family. The Kaiser going practically out of his way to deny Wormmon yet paradoxically keeping him around is basically his attitude towards his own “weak” and naturally kindhearted self. Notably, recall that the principle of “a Digimon will never deny their partner” applies here -- Wormmon’s “betrayal” of the Kaiser isn’t really any kind of denial, since he was doing it mainly for Ken’s own sake, and, more symbolically, it’s Ken reaching his own limit and coming to realize that this path isn’t what he really wants.
Wormmon is unusually clingy to his own partner over the course of 02, and it’s vital to Ken needing to learn to love himself and also getting important validation that he needs, especially during the critical point in time during 02 episodes 23-30 when he’s still not sure how to approach the rest of the group -- Wormmon gives him someone to talk to honestly and openly, giving him a proper springboard to sort out his complicated feelings about the others and himself. You can say also that as Ken becomes more open and straightforward over the course of the latter half of 02, he, in turn, becomes much more shameless about showing affection and opening his own heart.
Wallace, Gumimon, and Chocomon
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Bonus round!
While it’s hard to fully apply Hurricane Touchdown to this theory (by official admission, it wasn’t properly cross-referenced with the original Adventure/02 series lore, and trying to correlate all of the evolutions in this movie to something metaphorical will give you a headache), Wallace’s two partners still fit very neatly into this overall theory of Digimon partners as a part of the self. Wallace is a character with very sharp duality, trying to be a flirt who asserts himself as a vagrant who’s about to “become an adult”, yet still feels an obligation to keep calling his mom and is engaging in increasingly self-destructive behavior.
Most pertinently, Gumimon and Chocomon represent the two stances Wallace is torn between: wanting to “return to the past” (Chocomon) because he’s still hung up on having lost Chocomon and is convinced that he can make everything just like it was before, and “being able to productively move on” (Gumimon). For most of the early parts of the movie, Wallace is stuck on Chocomon’s mentality of fixating on the past, and Gumimon isn’t even remotely subtle when he draws an explicit parallel between the two (saying that Chocomon didn’t like the heat, followed by offering to give Wallace shade as a hat). But once the conflict escalates and Wallace realizes just how deep in denial Chocomon is, to the point of being destructive to himself and others, Wallace comes to embrace Gumimon’s stance of practicality and moving on. In the end, the ultimate conclusion is reached, and Wallace is forced to fully accept that latter stance when Chocomon dies, but the movie’s ending (and Kizuna) provide an extra option: allowing the past to come back, but in a new form and treading new territory instead of trying to make it “the way it was before”.
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todomitoukei · 3 years
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Japanese vs. English Todoroki - A 301 Comparison
Finally, for the first time since this manga has begun - and it only took 300 chapters to get here - we get an entire chapter that is solely about the Todoroki family! As I read through the chapter and started to type down the Japanese text, I asked myself which scenes I should translate. And so here we are with me having translated every single line. With that, this is a long post. Long. You have been warned. So let’s get right into it:
The chapter starts out with a flashback to Endeavor speaking with Rei’s father to get his approval to marry Rei:
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「次期No.1の呼び声高いエンデヴァー様からお声掛けいただけるとは夢にも思いませんでした!僥倖の極みにございます!!」
「次期 ; jiki 」-> next term
「No.1 ; nanbaa wan 」-> number one
「呼び声高い ; yobigoe takai 」-> being widely talked about as a prominent prospect (for)
「エンデヴァー様 ; endevaa sama 」-> Endeavor-Sama
「から ; kara 」-> from
「お声掛け ; okoegake 」-> greeting; approaching (someone)
「いただける ; itadakeru 」-> receive (potential form)
「とは ; to wa」-> adds emphasis to the prior word/phrase
「夢にも思いませんでした ; yume ni mo omoimasen deshita 」-> I never dreamed that; not in one’s wildest dreams
「僥倖 ; gyoukou 」-> good fortune
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「極み ; kiwami 」-> height; extremity
「に ; ni 」-> at
「ございます ; gozaimasu 」-> to be
= “I never dreamed that we would receive greetings from Endeavor-Sama, who is widely talked about as a prominent prospect for the next term’s Number One position. We are at the height of good fortune!!”
It’s kinda sad if the height of your good fortune is meeting Endeavor. I also wonder how he reached out to them? “Hi, I need a wife with an ice quirk, do you have one?” How did he even search them? Is there some kind of registry that tells you which family has which quirk? 
Anyway, we then learn a little about Rei’s family:
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「氷叢もかつては名家と呼ばれた由緒ある家柄にございます故―
トップヒーロー様の伴侶としましては充分に釣り合いがとれるものと。。。」
「氷叢 ; himura 」-> Himura
「も ; mo 」-> also
「かつて ; katsute 」-> once; before; formerly
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「名家 ; meika 」-> noble family; distinguished family
「と呼ばれた ; to yobareta 」-> was called
「由緒ある ; yuisho aru 」-> prestigious; with a long history
「家柄 ; iegara」-> social standing of a family; lineage
「に ; ni 」-> from
「ございます ; gozaimasu 」-> to be
「故 ; yue 」-> reason; cause; circumstances
「トップヒーロー様 ; toppu hiro sama 」-> Top Hero-Sama
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「伴侶 ; hanryo 」-> spouse
「としまして ; to shimashite 」-> to take as
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「充分に ; juubun ni 」-> sufficient; enough (the ni turns this word into an adverb)
「釣り合い ; tsuriai 」-> balance
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「とれる ; toreru 」-> to be attained (of balance)
「ものと ; mono to 」-> shall; to assume; understood as
= “The Himura family was also once called a noble family. It’s a lineage with a long history - so to take her as a top hero’s spouse shall be a sufficiently attained balance.”
Something I would like to note here is something that is difficult to properly translate, which is the politeness level. There are a lot of different politeness levels to show the different social ranks. We don’t know how Rei’s father normally speaks, but he probably talks politely here to show respect to a top hero, which also makes this seem more like a business deal rather than a familiar conversation with your future father-in-law.
Anyway, we then get a little bit of narration from Endeavor:
「氷のような女だった」
「氷 ; koori 」-> ice
「のような ; no you na 」-> similar to; like
「女 ; onna 」-> woman
「だった ; datta 」-> was
= “She was a woman like ice.”
Ah, the classic “this woman doesn’t immediately worship me so she has no feelings” attitude. Not that I can say that I’m surprised he’d say something like that. And look at her. She looks so unhappy! Why are there people reading this chapter and claiming that this wasn’t a forced marriage when she looks like that? She clearly didn’t truly want this herself. This is also confirmed in the next line:
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「“個性婚”である事も承知の上で。。。。。。家の為に俺の妻になると言う。」
「個性婚 ; koseikon 」-> quirk marriage
「である ; de aru 」-> is; be
「事 ; de aru koto 」-> nominalizes the preceding phrase
「も ; mo 」-> also
「承知の上で ; shouchi no ue de 」-> being aware of; taking something into account
「家 ; ie 」-> family
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「為に ; tame ni」-> for the sake of
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「妻 ; tsuma 」-> wife
「になる ; ni naru 」-> to become
「と言う ; to iu」-> to say
= “She is also aware that this is a quirk marriage... she says she will become my wife for the sake of her family.”
De aru is a formal way used to express that someone is explaining something and makes it a neutral, official-sounding statement.
It’s not entirely clear to me how she knows that this is a quirk marriage, though. Did Endeavor just tell her? Did he tell her father? Does she just know?
It still leaves me baffled how some people read this sentence and came to the conclusion that it wasn’t a forced marriage just because she agreed to it. I’m actually kind of sensing a pattern here: first, we learn that Rei agreed to have more children, so people claimed she wanted to have all these kids with him. Now, she apparently wanted to marry him out of her own will. I cannot stress this enough, but please please understand that if you do something “for the sake of your family” or generally for the sake of someone else, it doesn’t mean you actually want it yourself. If you live your life basing your decisions on what makes the people around you happy, you will not be happy. It’s one thing to be selfless, but another to never live for your own sake.
The only reason Endeavor decided to have a wife, specifically Rei, was for his own selfish goals. And the only reason Rei agreed, despite knowing she was being heavily objectified and reduced to her quirk here, was to please her family. However, this in no way indicates what her true feelings are. 
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「。。。花が好きか」
「花 ; hana 」-> flowers
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「好き ; suki 」-> to like
「か ; ka 」-> question marker particle
= “... Do you like the flowers?”
A pretty straight-forward sentence.
「はい。とても綺麗。 」
「はい ; hai 」-> yes
「とても ; totemo 」-> very
「綺麗 ; kirei 」-> pretty; beautiful; lovely
= “Yes. They’re very pretty.”
Can I just say that she looks so sad here? There is something very lonely about her expression and the way she looks at these flowers. I’ve mentioned it before in another post, but the flowers Rei likes so much are Rindou, and the meaning of them is “I love you who is sad”, “justice”, or “sincere; faithful” - this would probably be more something to talk about in a separate meta on Rei, but I think maybe she identifies with those flowers in a way? She doesn’t seem happy - and granted, who would be in her situation? Maybe her whole life has been sort of dictated by her family and about pleasing them instead of ever being truly happy. These flowers are a common theme in terms of their relationship, so it’s likely that here, she is the one who is sad and maybe she just wants to be loved despite knowing this marriage isn’t based on love. She might still be hopeful that it will turn into love eventually and for now, she just enjoys the thought that someone might love someone as sad and unhappy as her.
「強く。。。しかし触れれば溶けて消えてしまいそうな。。。」
「強く ; tsuyoku 」-> strong
「しかし ; shikashi 」-> however
「触れれば ; furereba 」-> to touch; to come in contact with (conditional form)
「溶けて ; tokete 」-> to melt
「消えて ; kiete 」-> ; to vanish
「しまい ; shimai 」-> to do something completely
「そうな ; souna 」-> it seems
= “Strong… however, she seems like she would completely melt and vanish if I touched her.”
Then… don’t. Anyway, as mentioned in other posts, a verb + shimau means either that something that was done was regrettable or that it was done completely. Shimai is the polite version of this same concept. Back to the present:
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「冷。。。!おまえ。。。大丈夫。。。なのか」
「冷 ; rei 」-> Rei
「おまえ ; omae 」-> you
「大丈夫 ; daijoubu 」-> alright
「なのか ; nanoka 」-> question marker particle seeking an explanation
= “Rei…! You… are you alright?”
The no itself is already a question marker, but men often add ka to it to make it more ~manly~
「大丈夫じゃないよ」
「大丈夫 ; daijoubu 」-> alright
「じゃない」-> am not
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
= “I’m not alright!”
I’m not sure what kind of answer he expected, to be honest, but I think we can all appreciate Rei here. The official translation did a good job capturing that emphasis of yo by having her say “Okay? No, I’m not.” which bolds her statement a little more.
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「だから来たの」
「だから ; dakara 」-> that’s why
「来た ; kita 」-> came; arrived
「の ; no 」-> explanatory particle
= “That’s why I came.”
Other people have already pointed out how this line is similar to All Might’s catchphrase, which is 「私が来た」 - watashi ga kita. Obviously, she doesn’t say that exact line - although that would have been absolutely hilarious to see, just imagine you see your wife after ten years of her being in a mental hospital because of you and your obsession with your rival only for her to quote your rival’s catchphrase at you? Iconic! Anyway, it still has that same feeling to it.
Another thing worth noting is how much her expression here differs from the earlier flashbacks. 
The panel of her looking at the flowers is a high-angle shot, which is used to make the subject seem inferior and looked down on. Additionally, that shot is from Endeavor’s POV, which is to give us a sense to show us how he viewed her - inferior. He is the hero and he is the one planning on using her to gain more power for himself. He made the decision to get a wife and thus initiated this whole relationship.
In this panel, though, we look at her with an eye-level shot. This is a neutral perspective, so it’s neither a superior or inferior situation, but there is still a specific atmosphere being created, usually done to make the viewer connect with the character and sort of having the character’s emotions be projected onto the viewer, especially in uncomfortable scenarios. To intensify this, we are staring directly at her. In the flashback, she is also turned to the side, so we don’t see her full face. Instead, she is avoiding eye contact and instead, is looking down at the flowers. Showing a character from the side creates a distance and makes it less clear what the character truly thinks.
But here, she is fully facing the viewers and staring directly at us. As mentioned before, this angle is meant to make you feel what the characters feel, especially when there’s an uncomfortable atmosphere. So here, when she says “That’s why I came” it’s supposed to make you uncomfortable. The “I am not alright” isn’t because her supposedly dead son turned out to be alive and a villain - she is not alright because of all the pain each of them endured for the past decade because of Endeavor. She lost ten years of her life, precious time with her kids, missed seeing them grow up, because of him. She wasn’t able to be there for them because of him. So no, she is not alright. But now she is out. And now she can finally regain some power. Power she never had in this relationship and possibly never had in her whole life. But now she is here. She is here because she feels guilty for what happened to her son, but she isn’t going to just give up. She is holding herself accountable, but she is making sure Endeavor knows he is the culprit. He is supposed to be uncomfortable and so should you (to understand that Endeavor is not the victim here) and anyone who sees that panel and thinks she is being supportive of him here? She isn’t.
I’ve seen a lot of people either claim that she is supporting Endeavor here or people say that she is being too soft on him here. While I don’t really see how this could possibly be her supporting him, I definitely do agree that Horikoshi seems to avoid wanting anyone directly pointing a finger at Endeavor, which is odd considering throughout the whole story everyone in the Todoroki family has always only ever blamed Endeavor. Dabi made it very clear in his broadcast that he wants to destroy Endeavor, Shouto always blamed Endeavor for his scar and for Rei being in the mental hospital, Natsuo can’t even have one dinner with Endeavor because he has always been neglected by him and because he blames Endeavor for what happened with Touya - rightfully so, by the way, Touya being alive doesn’t exactly change that Endeavor destroyed Touya. And given how Horikoshi writes female characters in general, it’s not really surprising that the only ones who don’t actively speak out against and blame Endeavor are the women of the family.
But while I do think that Horikoshi is toning down on that here and I don’t wanna give him too much credit, we should also keep in mind that this is the first time in ten years that Rei talks to him. Just a few months prior, when Fuyumi and Natsuo visited her, she said that she was still afraid to see him. I think it’s actually more realistic that she isn’t yelling at him or anything like that, yet is still able to at least put him in his place and remind him that this isn’t about him.
And that’s the other reason why I think it makes sense she reacts the way she does. It’s not about him, but this is also not about her. The last line of chapter 300 was saying “I’m here to talk about our family and Touya.” This isn’t about any of them individually except for Touya (more on that later). So if she gave an entire speech here about how much pain Endeavor has caused her and how he took ten years of her life away, this simply isn’t the time. Instead, she is prioritizing Touya.
Could she be a bit more clear that Endeavor is the culprit who caused them all a lot of pain and trauma? Yes, apparently she needs to say this more clearly considering how many people absolutely fail to interpret this correctly by claiming they are a happy family. But it’s not the most unrealistic way to write her here, either.
But let’s move on to Dabi and where the main criticism for the official translation comes in:
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「だいぶ焼けたな。。。」
「だいぶ ; daibu 」-> considerably; greatly; a lot
「焼けた ; yaketa 」-> burned
「な ; na 」-> sentence ending particle; usually used to seek confirmation
= “Burned a lot, huh…”
Someone recently pointed out to me that Dabi’s staples might actually just be there for him to check how much his scars are spreading. And that really does seem to be the case now as he has simply moved them to the new edges of the scars. The new burns aren’t yet as intense as the rest, so I guess those aren’t skin grafts that need to be held in place, after all, but just his skin heavily burned?
As mentioned above, na gets used at the end of a statement to seek confirmation, however, it can also be used in a more rhetorical sense to make a sentence less assertive in order to simply introduce a topic in a more casual and less abrupt way.
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「何も感じねぇ」
「何も ; nanimo 」-> (not) anything
「感じねぇ ; kanjinee 」-> not feeling
= “I don’t feel anything.”
The normal negation of kanjiru (to feel) is kanjinai. Changing the nai into nee is a more casual form, but it can also be used instead of nai to add more emotion/feeling to what is being said, which is kinda ironic in a sentence talking about his inability to feel anything.
Dabi generally uses both forms (nai and nee) for negation so it’s hard to say if this is just him negating a word or if this form gets used to put more emotion to it, though it’s probably a mixture of both considering he is just lying there and reflecting on the situation.
More importantly, this sentence reminded me of what he said to Shouto in chapter 292 「そうだよ焦凍。兄ちゃん何も感じなくなっちまった。」- “That’s right, Shouto. Nii-Chan has completely stopped feeling anything.”
While the line from chapter 292 is referring to his mental state, he is now talking about his physical state. So basically, Dabi is completely numb - both physically and mentally. Fun times!
「あいつは俺の親父だ。あの程度で死ねるようなタマじゃねえ。例え死にたくても立場がそれを許さない。」
「あいつ ; aitsu 」-> he; that guy
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「親父 ; oyaji 」-> dad
「だ ; da 」-> be
「あの ; ano 」-> that
「程度 ; teido 」-> degree; amount
「で ; de 」-> by; of
「死ねる ; shineru 」-> to die (potential form)
「ような ; youna 」-> like; similar to
「タマ ; tama 」-> person (when commenting on their nature); character
「じゃねえ ; janee」-> isn’t
「例え死にたくても」-> even if you want to die (例え...ても + 死にたく)
「立場 ; tachiba 」-> position; situation
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「それ ; sore 」-> that
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「許さない ; yurusanai 」-> doesn’t allow
= “That guy is my dad. He isn’t the kind of person to die from something of that degree. Even if he wanted to die, the situation doesn’t allow that.”
A few things to note here:
First of all, and I know this is a big shocker to us all, and it does pain me to say, but he does not say “adios” here. He really just says “want to die” and, although this is such an unimportant change it’s just really annoying to constantly see him being translated in such a weird way. Even minor changes like this one just make him sound strange. Dabi is someone who chooses his words carefully, so it really does alter people’s perception of him when he suddenly starts speaking like that. Does anyone actually talk like that?
“He isn’t the person to die from something of that degree” - Here, Dabi uses “tama” which is usually written in Kanji, but is written in Katakana here for emphasis. More importantly, though, this is a derogatory term.
Anyway, that sentence follows after the obvious statement of “That guy is my dad” - which isn’t new information to us, but this is the reason why he concludes that Endeavor hasn’t died without actually having that confirmed. He is able to tell how much damage Endeavor can take, possibly also stating here that as long as Dabi himself doesn’t die from his attack, Endeavor also wouldn’t have died. So much for his self-confidence! The “dear old dad” in the official translation yet again sounds a bit odd. It might be used to make a more clear distinction between otousan and oyaji, but much like boku and ore (male pronouns), you don’t really need to make a distinction in English because it’s just something unique to Japanese, and trying to translate it results in something like “dear old dad” which just makes the character sound weird because no one says that in English.
“The situation doesn’t allow it” - while the fan translation went for “I won’t allow it” the official translation went for “His position won’t allow it” - all of which are different statements. It’s hard to determine which of these is correct since there isn’t a pronoun used here. The reason I went for “the situation” is because it seems like he is referring to the current state the country is in. We’ve already been shown how much damage has done and the “I am not here” statue shown in the previous chapter is a good summary of that. Although it’s unlikely that Endeavor could do much to make things go back to how they used to be before the reveal, the country is still waiting for his statement, which will further impact the situation. If he died now, it would probably be the end for heroes, whereas him being alive and trying to somehow save the country could bring a little hope back to the people. So basically, the future depends on him (not really, but that’s the general idea here).
「そろそろ表に出てくる頃合いだ。」
「そろそろ ; sorosoro」-> gradually; soon
「表 ; omote 」-> surface
「に ; ni 」-> to
「出てくる ; detekuru 」-> to come out; to appear
「頃合い ; koroai 」-> suitable time; good time
「だ ; da 」-> be
= “Soon it’s a good time to come to the surface.”
Much like the rest of the country, Dabi is clearly also awaiting Endeavor’s statement to the public so he can plan his next move.
Something to note here is that these two panels use the thinking speech bubbles, so we have two different kinds of internal monologues from Dabi in this scene: interior monologue and soliloquy. Soliloquy refers to a speech given to oneself out loud, which is why this is commonly found in plays in order to show what a character is thinking since you can’t make the audience hear the character’s thoughts otherwise. 
An interior monologue gives us readers immediate access to a character’s unfiltered thoughts. Since we don’t exactly control our thoughts, we often jump from one thought to another without explaining how we got there. So when Dabi thinks “That guy is my dad.” followed by “He isn’t the kind of person to die from something of that degree.” - he doesn’t have to go into an elaborate explanation as to why the second sentence is the conclusion of his first statement because he just knows.
A soliloquy isn’t too different as the character is still their own audience. However, this style is often used to amplify a character’s thoughts, in a way signaling that they can’t keep their thoughts inside anymore so instead they just come out of the character’s mouth. Using these two styles here emphasizes the soliloquy even further. While his interior monologue is a reflection of what happened and tells us that Dabi already knew he wasn’t going to kill Endeavor back then, the soliloquy part focuses more on his actual feelings. This last part of his interior monologue, where he concludes that Endeavor will have to face the public soon, serves as a trigger of his following excitement, highlighting his obsession with making his dreams of ruining Endeavor come true.
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「早く惨めな面が見てぇ楽しみだ。ここまで長かった。」
「早く ; hayaku 」-> soon; quick (adverb)
「惨めな ; mijime na 」-> miserable
「面 ; men 」-> face; mask
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「見てぇ ; mitee 」-> to see
「楽しみ ; tanoshimi 」-> anticipation; looking forward to
「だ ; da 」-> be
「ここまで ; koko made 」-> so far
「長かった ; nagakatta 」-> was long (time)
= “I’m looking forward to seeing your miserable face soon. It’s been a long time so far.”
Here we have another case of the official English translation making him talk in ways no one talks. Aside from the “pathetic mug” part, Dabi doesn’t say “damn” - considering swear words aren’t really a thing in Japanese anyway. But he’s also generally not really talking in a rude way here, it’s just a pretty straight-forward sentence. To be honest, I think the reason why certain characters (i.e. Dabi) get written like that™ is to add character and distinguish them from less casual-speaking characters? To show that this is a character that’s a bit on the rougher side? Even so, he doesn’t actually talk like that, and trying to make him sound rough in every single sentence is a bit of an overkill. I get that he’s dramatic, but that still doesn’t mean that he speaks like he never read a normal book.
To quickly bring up the soliloquy again: You can see with this sentence that this is far more subjective. “Soon it’s a good time to come to the surface” was somewhat objective as the whole country awaits Endeavor’s public statement to this situation. But “I’m looking forward to seeing your miserable face soon. It’s been a long time so far” is subjective. The public might not necessarily care about a hero being exposed. But Dabi cares because to him, this whole reveal is personal (obviously). This plan has been in the making for around ten years, whereas the rest of the country was unaware of the truth about Endeavor up until a few days ago.
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「轟炎司。お母さん。冬美ちゃん。夏くん。。。。。。焦凍。」
「轟炎司 ; todoroki enji 」-> Enji Todoroki 
「お母さん ; okaasan 」-> mom
「冬美ちゃん ; fuyumi chan」-> Fuyumi-Chan
「夏くん ; natsu kun」-> Natsu-Kun
「焦凍 ; shouto 」-> Shouto
= “Enji Todoroki. Mom. Fuyumi-Chan. Natsu-Kun….. Shouto.”
While we can’t exactly blame the official translation for not including these suffixes, the distinction with Shouto doesn’t really show in the translation at all. Endeavor is an obvious one in either version - addressing your parent by full name indicates a distance as this shows no signs of familiarity. Much like his other siblings (I will talk about this at some point in a separate post) he calls his mom okaasan, a pretty normal way to say mom. As the older sibling, he wouldn’t have to use a suffix for any of his siblings, but this can - especially in a case like this - show familiarity. Aside from the many many dots representing a small pause he makes before even naming Shouto almost like he initially forgot about him, Shouto is also the only one only being called by name without a suffix, so the distinction becomes far more pronounced. It’s obvious that Touya, Fuyumi, and Natsuo grew up together and spent a lot of time together, thus he still uses these suffixes. But Shouto is just… Shouto. There is no relationship between them and the many dots just show this distance between the two.
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「俺を見てくれ地獄の底で。」
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「見てくれ ; mitekure 」-> please look at me
「地獄 ; jigoku 」-> hell
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「底 ; soko 」-> bottom
「で ; de 」-> in
= “Please look at me in the depths of hell.”
The kure at the end of mitekure gets used when asking a favor from someone.
The official translation yet again sounds a bit weirder with the “Take a real good look at me” when kure is more of a “Please look at me” which sounds less assertive. Anyway, Dabi is clearly trying to state that his life is hell and now they get to see it, too. At the end of the chapter, Rei says that she and Endeavor both didn’t look at him before and there are several times during the flashback where Touya says “look at me!” which is all a summary of where this whole thing went wrong: Touya was in pain, and he made it known that he needed help and that he wasn’t okay, but both his parents ignored that. And so now his broadcast forces them to look at him. Forces them to look at what happened as a result of them ignoring his pain before. It’s not just to show the civilians how their heroes aren’t all that heroic, but more importantly, it’s so that someone can see his pain. He’s not giving them a choice, either. Though people - both in bnha society and in the fandom - write Dabi off as annoying or continue to refuse to see him as a victim, it really doesn’t matter because what he has accomplished is making people experience his pain. He is damaging society just how society has damaged him. Just how his father said “you’re not good enough” it’s now Dabi’s turn to say the same thing to him and society.
Dabi is already in the depths of hell, yet so far his family didn’t know that. But now they do and now they have to face the facts.
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「せっかく休みなんだから“個性”訓練付き合ってよ!!何で急にダメとか言うんだよ!!」
「せっかく ; sekkaku 」-> after all the effort
「休み ; yasumi 」-> rest; holiday
「なんだから ; nandakara 」-> so
「“個性” ; kosei 」-> quirk
「訓練 ; kunren 」-> training
「付き合って ; tsukiatte 」-> to go along with; to follow someone’s lead
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
「何で ; nande 」-> why
「急に ; kyuu ni 」-> suddenly
「ダメ ; dame 」-> no good
「とか ; toka 」-> and so on; such as
「言う ; iu 」-> to say; to mean
「んだ ; nda 」-> used for emphasis when information has been shared
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
= “You have a day off, so come do quirk training with me after all that effort!! Why do you suddenly say things like it’s no good!!”
Sekkaku doesn’t have a direct translation, but here it emphasizes that an opportunity has come up (Endeavor having a day off), which would be a shame to waste by not spending it with training. The nanda in nandakara is a preliminary remark, which can be used to get the listener’s attention to the conclusion that follows after. Again, these are nuances that you can’t necessarily translate. But at least little Touya talks more like a normal person than Dabi.
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「何度も言ったろう。おまえの為なんだ。」
「何度も ; nando mo 」-> many times over; often
「言ったろう ; ittarou 」-> told; said
「おまえ ; omae 」-> you
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「為 ; tame 」-> advantage; benefit
「んだ ; nda 」-> explanatory particle
= “I’ve told you many times. It’s for your benefit.”
The tarou ending in ittarou is used to add an accusatory tone to the phrase, so it shows somewhat of an impatience/annoyance here. Imagine being Touya. You always look forward to your training days with your incredible dad. And suddenly, he keeps canceling on you and just says “it’s for your own good” - kids aren’t stupid, and they know when they are treated as though they were. So it’s obviously frustrating that his dad just gives him weak excuses instead of being honest with him. And it’s not like Endeavor is seeking an actual way to help Touya. All he does is go to the doctor, gets told that Touya’s body and quirk don’t match, and then his solution is to stop training him. It’s one thing to be a concerned parent and keep your child away from harm, but it’s more important to think about how you keep them from harm and whether or not you ensure that they know that failing doesn’t mean that they are a failure. Problem is, Endeavor can’t tell him he’s not a failure since Touya is a failed project so he does, in fact, see him as a failure.
If you take a quick look at Touya, you can see his hair is only now starting to get a few white spots. It’s difficult to determine the exact timeline of things, but it’s obvious that this takes place only shortly after his hair first started turning white, which means that Endeavor went to the doctor pretty quickly. And yes, he says this is for Touya’s sake but remind me again why Touya is born? Oh right, for Endeavor’s sake! Anyway, moving on to the doctor’s office:
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「珍しい例ですね。。。炎の個性因子はより色濃く引き継がれているのですが。肉体はお母さんの方を強く引き継いでしまってるんです」
「珍しい ; mezurashii 」-> rare
「例 ; rei 」-> instance; case
「です ; desu 」-> to be
「ね ; ne 」-> sentence ending particle; used to seek confirmation
「炎 ; honou 」-> flame
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「個性 ; kosei 」-> quirk
「因子 ; inshi 」-> factor
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「より ; yori 」-> than
「色濃く ; irokoku 」-> strongly tending to
「引き継がれている ; hikitsugareteiru 」-> inheriting (present progressive passive form)
「のです ; no desu 」-> explanatory particle
「が ; ga 」-> but
「肉体 ; nikutai 」-> the body; the flesh
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「お母さん ; okaasan 」-> mom
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「方 ; hou 」-> type
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「強く ; tsuyoku 」-> strong (adverb)
「引き継いでしまってるん ; hikitsuide shimatterun 」-> completely inheriting
「です ; desu 」-> to be
= “A rare case, isn’t it? The flame quirk factor is more strongly inherited, but the body is strongly and completely inherited from the mother’s type.”
In the last part, we once again have the verb + shimau constellation, which always either indicates that something happened regrettable or completely. In a way, both meanings apply here since Touya’s body fully takes after Rei’s constitution, but this is also obviously regrettable since it’s a waste of his strong fire quirk. In the official translation, he just says “he takes after his mother physically” which doesn’t really carry either nuance.
「つまり。。。炎への体制よりも氷結。。。寒さに適性のある身体なんです。」
「つまり ; tsumari 」-> that is to say; in other words
「炎 ; honou 」-> flame
「への ; e no 」-> particle that describes the word that follows using the direction towards the word that comes before
「体制 ; taisei 」-> order ; system
「よりも ; yorimo 」-> in comparison to; rather than
「氷結 ; hyouketsu 」-> freezing; freezing over
「寒さ ; samusa 」-> coldness
「に ; ni 」-> for (purpose)
「適性 ; tekisei 」-> aptitude; suitability
「のある ; no aru 」-> there is
「身体 ; karada 」-> body
「なんです ; nandesu 」-> explanatory particle
= “In other words, it’s a body with an aptitude for the cold rather than being a system to the flames.”
Considering all the support items the heroes have, I feel like they could have found a solution to this. Dabi’s current coat helps cool him down, so why did Endeavor not think of something like that?
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「まア。。。デザインじみたことはね。。。この“個性”時代禁忌なんで。。。やめといた方が。。。 」
「まア ; maa 」-> well
「デザイン ; dezain 」-> design
「じみた ; jimita 」-> like
「こと ; koto 」-> thing
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「ね ; ne 」-> sentence ending particle; used to seek confirmation
「この ; kono 」-> this
「“個性” ; kosei 」-> quirk
「時代 ; jidai 」-> period
「禁忌 ; kinki 」-> taboo
「なんで ; nande 」-> because
「やめ ; yame 」-> to stop
「といた ; to ita」-> to do something in advance (contraction of te oita)
「方が ; hou ga 」-> should; it’d be better to (used to give advice)
= “Well… design-like things, huh… because this taboo of the “quirk” period… It’d be better to stop in advance.”
I feel like a normal doctor should maybe inform someone that this Top Hero is having a little eugenics project on the side. Maybe also call Child Protective Services. But since we’re all assuming this doctor is Dr. Ujiko, it’s not exactly surprising that he left it at “giving advice” which he is just as good at as Endeavor. Those two would truly get along well.
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「なんと今日は62もの市町村を救いました!オールマイトがいる限り我々が悪に屈する事は決してないでしょう!!」
「なんと ; nanto 」-> what…!; surprisingly; believe it or not
「今日 ; kyou 」-> today
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「62 ; 62 」-> 62 
「も ; mo 」-> emphasizes the number
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「市町村 ; shichouson 」-> cities, towns and villages
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「救いました ; sukuimashita 」-> saved
「オールマイト ; oorumaito 」-> All Might
「がいる ; ga iru 」-> there is
「限り ; kiri 」-> as long as
「我々 ; wareware 」-> we
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「悪 ; aku 」-> evil
「に ; ni 」-> to
「屈する ; kussuru 」-> to yield; to give in
「事 ; koto」-> nominalizes the verb it attaches to
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「決してない ; kesshitenai 」-> never; by no means
「でしょう ; deshou 」-> used to express certainty
= “What! Today, 62 cities, towns, and villages were saved! We will certainly never give in to evil as long as All Might is there!”
The mo after the 62 implies that 62 is a large number and granted, that is a lot of places to save in one day. 
「燈矢。おまえならオールマイトを超えられる。」
「燈矢 ; touya 」-> Touya
「おまえ ; omae 」-> you
「なら ; nara 」-> on the topic of; if
「オールマイト ; oorumaito 」-> All Might
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「超えられる ; koerareru 」-> to surpass (potential)
= “Touya. You can surpass All Might.”
Let’s move on to some sibling interaction, though:
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「冬美ちゃん。ちょっと火傷するくらいなのにさ!全然がまんできるのにさ!」
「冬美ちゃん ; fuyumi chan」-> Fuyumi
「ちょっと ; chotto 」-> a little
「火傷する ; yakedo suru」-> to burn
「くらい ; kurai 」-> used to describe a state, situation
「なのに ; nanoni 」-> even though; although
「さ ; sa 」-> emphasis particle
「全然 ; zen zen 」-> entirely; completely
「がまん ; gaman 」-> bearing (something)
「できる ; dekiru 」-> be able to
「のに ; noni 」-> used when complaining to someone
「さ ; sa 」-> emphasis particle; also used to let out emotions
= “Fuyumi-Chan. I only burn a little! I am able to endure it!”
Noni is something that roughly translates to even though, and usually gets followed with a second part of the phrase, but that follow-up part can be left out when you can understand it from context. So in that first part, he’s basically saying “Even though I got burned a little, I can still do this so he shouldn’t stop training me!” The second noni is used as a way to complain about the situation (= “Even though I am completely able to endure it, I get treated like I’m weak.”)
「俺の身体のことは俺が一番よくわかってるんだ。」
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「身体 ; karada 」-> body
「のことは」-> nominalizes the preceding phrase
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「一番 ; ichiban 」-> the most
「よく ; yoku 」-> good (adverb)
「わかってるん ; wakatterun 」-> to understand; to know
「だ ; da 」-> be
= “I am the one that knows my body the best.”
We don’t know how fast his hair color was changing, but this is probably a few months after his hair first began to turn white. So at this point, Endeavor already knows that Touya’s body and quirk aren’t compatible yet still hasn’t bothered to come up with a solution. Instead, Touya keeps training. It’s odd that no one seems to try and properly stop him and make him understand that training isn’t good for him.
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「でも冬美も燈矢兄ボロボロなの心配嫌っ。」
「でも ; demo 」-> but
「冬美 ; fuyumi」-> Fuyumi
「も ; mo 」-> also
「燈矢兄 ; touya-nii 」-> Touya-Nii
「ボロボロ ; boroboro 」-> worn-out (physically); tattered
「なの ; nano 」-> this particle functions as a substitute for a noun (= his body)
「心配 ; shinpai 」-> worry
「嫌っ ; yaa 」-> casual no
= “But Fuyumi also doesn’t [want to] worry about Touya-Nii [being] tattered.”
Me too, Fuyumi, me too.
「冬美ちゃんにはわかんねーよ!女の子にはわかんねンだ!」
「冬美ちゃん ; fuyumi chan」-> Fuyumi-Chan
「には ; niwa 」-> as for
「わかんねー」-> doesn’t understand
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
「女の子」->
「には ; niwa 」-> as for
「わかんね」-> doesn’t understand
「ンだ ; nda 」-> explanatory particle
= “Fuyumi doesn’t understand! Girls don’t understand!”
The n in nda is written in Katakana, once again for emphasis.
Also he looks so adorable the way he is marching out of the room there. Tiny Touya.
Still can’t believe some people in this fandom apparently were never (around) kids and somehow drew the conclusion that Touya is sexist. What a great takeaway from this entire chapter! Anyway, that’s just how kids talk - and definitely something brothers say to their sisters - but I’m pretty sure if he tried to say something like that now Fuyumi wouldn’t let him get away with it. But she’s like 2 (?) here, so not like she cares. Oh and… if you think “a girl wouldn’t get it” is sexist, then wouldn’t you also have that same energy in regards to a man solely getting a wife to use her as a baby-maker-machine, and then after putting her into a mental hospital proceeding to turn his only daughter (who was only created as emotional support person for her older brother) into a replacement for the mom? Yeah, I’m really surprised little Touya would say something that could be considered sexist...
「心配ちてんのに!! 」
「心配ちてん ; shinpai chiten 」-> worrying
「のに ; noni 」-> used when complaining to someone
= “I’m worrying!!”
Here, little Fuyumi-Chan is basically complaining that Touya-Nii is mad and says she doesn’t understand, even though she is just worried about him. Everybody say “Thank you, Fuyumi!” for caring about Touya. Now, moving on to the actual sad panel:
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「俺はもう「超えたい」って思ってるんだ!火をつけたのはお父さんだ!」
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「もう ; mou 」-> already
「超えたい ; koetai 」-> want to surpass
「って思ってるん ; tte omotterun 」-> thinking
「だ ; da 」-> be
「火をつけた ; hi o tsuketa 」-> ignited
「のは ; no wa」->
「お父さん ; otousan 」-> dad
「だ ; da 」-> be
= “I’m already thinking ‘I want to surpass him’! Dad is the one that ignited that flame in me!”
He is crying! Already! He acted tougher before walking away, but now that he is facing away from Fuyumi, the tears start rolling in a very defensive way. It’s basically him knowing that he can’t live up to his father’s expectations, but this is what he wants. He “wants” to surpass All Might, but it’s Endeavor who ignited that fire in him. Kids oftentimes have one parent they are closer to and sometimes even look up to. For Touya, that’s obviously Endeavor. He wants to make his father proud and wants to be what his father wants him to be.
Clearly, he’s always been very smart and also very self-aware. He’s always known his limits, but also back then refused to admit to it because he still had hope that he would somehow be able to be this incredible hero, despite his limitations. He wasn’t willing to just give up back then, and even now in the present time, he doesn’t give up. He can’t just let go and move on with his life, because no one ever told him that was an acceptable option. Not performing well meant his father loved him less. That’s why he never gave up because a child naturally craves their parents’ attention and love, even if it isn’t a healthy love. So who would give up something if that would result in not being loved anymore?
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「それは。。。あんまりだよ。。。!残酷じゃない!あなたが子どもに何を求めてるか燈矢はもう知ってる!」
「それ ; sore 」-> that
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「あんまり ; anmari 」-> too much
「だ ; da 」-> be
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
「残酷 ; zankoku 」-> cruel
「じゃない ; janai 」-> used to express emotion; when you want to accuse someone
「あなた ; anata 」-> you
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「子ども ; kodomo 」-> child
「に ; ni 」-> for
「何 ; nani 」-> what
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「求めてる ; motometeru 」-> searching for; seeking
「か ; ka 」-> represents the intention of a question
「燈矢 ; touya 」-> Touya
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「もう ; mou 」-> already
「知ってる ; shitteru 」-> to know
= “That is… too much…! It’s cruel! Touya already knows what you want children for!”
A difference I noticed between the original version and the official English translation is that in the official translation Rei says “That would be too cruel!” whereas in the original version she says “That is cruel!” accompanied by janai which is used when you want to accuse someone. The “would” seems a bit more like Endeavor merely suggested something, but it’s still undecided. In reality, he’s not asking for her permission. It’s not about what Rei wants, yet she is still trying to make him come back to his senses and realize what effects his actions have on Touya.
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「どれだけ言っても。。。毎日新しい火傷をつくってくる。。。」
「どれだけ ; dore dake 」-> how much
「言っても ; ittemo 」-> although I say
「毎日 ; mainichi 」-> every day
「新しい ; atarashii 」-> new
「火傷 ; yakedo 」-> burn
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「つくってくる ; tsukuttekuru」-> continue to get (つくる + てくる)
= “Despite how much I say, he continues to get new burns every day.”
Well, the earlier advice of “it’s for your own good” isn’t exactly the best way to get your child to understand why it shouldn’t do something. There probably could’ve been a bit more initiative here, you know, like getting a therapist involved. Someone, who actually understands children and knows how to handle them.
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「バカなところも俺に似た。。。!諦めさせるにはそれしかない。。。燈矢には。。。超えられない 。」
「バカ ; baka 」-> idiot
「なところ ; na tokoro」-> aspect; side
「も ; mo 」-> also; too
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「に似た ; ni nita」-> resembled
「諦めさせる ; akirameru 」-> make someone give up
「には ; niwa 」-> as for
「それ ; sore 」-> that
「しかない ; shika nai 」-> only
「燈矢 ; touya 」-> Touya
「には ; niwa 」-> as for
「超えられない ; koerarenai 」-> can’t surpass
= “He also resembles me with the idiot aspect…! That is the only way to make him give up… Touya can’t surpass him.”
Those last two panels honestly look straight out of a horror story. Is that the face of a loving family man? Apparently so!
These posts originally started out because of the bias and obviously, Dabi is still written weirdly, but I do have to point out that the official translation at least doesn’t make Endeavor sound nicer here than he actually is.
I also find it interesting how Rei is drawn here, with half her face being in a shadow, which is usually a style used to show a character’s sinister side. Here, it’s accompanied by a sweat drop, which often indicates exasperation. This might indicate the start of a turning point for her. And this turning point is something that you see over the following panels until it comes to a finale on everyone’s faces once Shouto is born:
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Looking at their eyes, they all look less than fine here.
Touya just kinda stares lifelessly. As Rei stated in the previous scene, Touya already knows why he and his siblings exist. He already knew when Natsuo was born and thus, Natsuo’s existence was living proof that Touya was still not enough. Yet, he still refuses to give up and desperately tries to prove himself to his father. And then 3 ½ years later, another sibling arrives.
Rei has shading under her eye and her eyes only half-way open, indicating fatigue. Obviously, giving birth would do that, but she’s also just generally tired of this and probably began to understand how powerless she is. And Endeavor has his eyes wide-open with tiny pupils, often indicating a character’s drive (not in a good way). He knows this is the one.
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「お父さん。俺も超えられるよ。ほら。。。こんなに強い炎が出せるようになったんだ 。俺のこと見てよ。 」
「お父さん ; otousan 」-> dad
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「も ; mo 」-> too
「超えられる ; koerareru 」-> can surpass
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
「ほら ; hora 」-> look!, hey!
「こんなに ; konna ni」-> such
「強い ; tsuyoi 」-> strong
「炎 ; honou 」-> flame
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「出せる ; daseru 」-> can produce; start (a fire)
「ようになったん ; you ni nattan 」-> have reached the point that
「だ ; da 」-> be
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「のこと ; no koto 」-> about
「見て ; mite 」-> look 
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
= “Dad. I can also surpass him. Look… I have reached the point that I can produce such strong flames. Look at me!”
Based on this scene we can conclude that Touya kept training on his own. Endeavor knows about this, yet never bothered to actually stop him from going out to train (just saying “don’t do this” isn’t enough).
You can just see the desperation on his face, completely ignoring the tears running down his face. He is already at a point here where his feelings start to be tuned out. The only thing that’s on his mind is his goal of proving himself as the worthy successor.
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「ダメだ!何故わからん!そこまでの火傷を負って何故わからないんだ!!」
「ダメ ; dame 」-> no good
「だ ; da 」-> be
「何故 ; naze 」-> why
「わからん ; wakaran 」-> don’t understand
「そこまで ; sokomade 」-> that far
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「火傷 ; yakedo 」-> burn
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「負って ; otte 」-> receive (wound); injured
「何故 ; naze 」-> why
「わからない ; wakaranai 」-> don’t understand
「んだ ; nda 」-> explanatory particle
= “No good! I don’t understand why! You get so many burns and still don’t understand!!”
Again, not a great way to get your kid to understand anything. Yelling isn’t helping, either! Neither is telling them you don’t understand why they don’t understand.
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「燈矢。。。!!おまえは外を見ろ。冬美や夏雄と遊べ!!学校で友達をつくれ!ヒーロー以外にも。。。沢山の世界がある。。。わかるだろう!」
「燈矢 ; touya 」-> Touya
「おまえ ; omae 」-> you
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「外 ; soto 」-> outside
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「見ろ ; miro 」-> look (imperative)
「冬美 ; fuyumi」-> Fuyumi
「や ; ya 」-> and
「夏雄 ; natsuo」-> Natsuo
「と ; to 」-> with
「遊べ ; asobe 」-> play (imperative)
「学校 ; gakkou 」-> school
「で ; de 」-> at
「友達 ; tomodachi 」-> friends
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「つくれ ; tsukure 」-> to make (imperative)
「ヒーロー ; hiro 」-> hero
「以外 ; igai 」-> excepting; with the exception of
「にも ; nimo 」-> as well
「沢山 ; takusan 」-> plenty; enough; a large number
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「世界 ; sekai 」-> world
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「ある ; aru 」-> be
「わかる ; wakaru 」-> to understand
「だろう ; darou 」-> don’t you agree
= “Touya…!! Look outside! Play with Fuyumi and Natsuo!! Make friends at school! There are other things than heroes… there are many worlds… you understand that, don’t you!”
The darou at the end here is a little assertive, like saying “This is how I see it and you should agree!” which is captured in the official translation by him saying “I know you understand” - which is a funny phrasing since Touya obviously doesn’t understand.
I get that being a hero is often reduced to just being about fighting, but how is this man so incapable of understanding his own child? He knows Touya goes out training regularly - and has been for years - and keeps coming home with burns and even after all this time Touya still doesn’t listen to him, and yet his incredible advice here is “Go get some friends!” Is that… helpful to anyone? No wonder he never got to the Number One position if that’s how he tries to save people.
There’s actually a chapter in the School Briefs light novels (no spoilers) that brings up this topic too: What kind of hero are you if you can’t even save your own family?
And we’re not talking about Touya being held at gunpoint or something; we’re talking about years and years of this child’s mental and physical health decreasing, very obviously so, and it’s not getting any better.
Touya doesn’t do this because he’s jealous because he already did all of this before any of his competitors (= Natsuo and Shouto) were born. He’s doing this because he is a child and like any other child out there just wants his parents’ love and attention, which is literally the parents’ whole job. Endeavor failed both as a father and a hero.
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「そうしていく内に忘れる。」
「そうしていく ; soushiteiku 」-> continue to do so (そうする + ていく)
「内に ; uchi ni 」-> while
「忘れる ; wasureru 」-> to forget about it
= “While you continue to do so, you’ll forget about it.”
I don’t even know if he thinks this is good advice? Surely, no one could think this would be helpful here, right…?
「学校の子は皆ヒーローになるってさ。。。!。。。わかるはずないだろ。。。!」
「学校 ; gakkou 」-> school
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「子 ; ko 」-> kids
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「皆 ; minna 」-> everyone
「ヒーロー ; hiro 」-> hero
「になる ; ni naru 」-> to become
「って ; tte 」-> quotation marker
「さ ; sa 」-> emphasis particle
「わかる ; wakaru 」-> to understand
「はずない ; hazu nai 」-> cannot be 
「だろ ; daro 」-> right; I think
= “The kids at school all say they’ll become heroes…! I cannot understand, right?”
Hazu nai is used to strongly emphasize that something cannot be. In this case, Touya cannot possibly understand that concept of just letting go because this is his whole identity and you can’t just toss your whole identity away, especially when that identity is necessary in order to get your parents’ attention and love.
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「俺はお父さんの子どもなんだから」
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle
「お父さん ; otousan 」-> dad
「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe
「子ども ; kodomo 」-> child
「なんだから ; nandakara 」-> because; after all
= “After all, I am your child.”
Nandakara has an important nuance that’s worth talking about it. It’s used to give an explanation or emphasize something that both the listener and speaker know and expresses a strong emotion that the speaker feels and that the listener doesn’t fully appreciate. Apparently, some people had an issue with the official translation here and claiming it sounded too accusatory. Anyway, this child has every right to accuse his father of expecting him to just give up on his attempt at reaching his goal when Endeavor got married and had four kids because he wasn’t immediately handed the Number One position. That sure is ironic and sad that little Touya understands this so well, too.
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「冷やさなきゃ」
「冷やさなきゃ; hiyasanakya 」-> must cool; must calm down; must cool off (冷やす + なきゃ)
= “We must cool him off!”
This is a pun that also works in English! While the word hiyasu can mean to cool off in the sense of calming down, it can also mean to cool (from room temperature); to refrigerate. And both meanings are applicable here since Touya is having a breakdown and needs to be calmed down mentally, but he also seems to be sweating almost like his quirk is building up inside of him and about to boil over, which it then does as he tries to attack Shouto, so he also needs to be physically cooled down.
「お父さんが火をつけたんだ。。。!消えないんだよ。。。!!なかったことになんて。。。できないんだよ!」
「お父さん ; otousan 」-> dad
「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle
「火をつけた ; hi wo tsuketa 」-> ignited
「んだ ; nda 」-> explanatory particle
「消えない ; kienai 」-> won’t go out
「んだ ; nda 」-> explanatory particle
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
「なかったことに ; nakatta koto ni 」-> to forget something ever existed; to pretend something didn’t happen
「なんて ; nante 」-> something like
「できない ; dekinai 」-> can’t
「んだ ; nda 」-> explanatory particle
「よ ; yo 」-> emphasis particle
= “Dad ignited that fire in me…! It won’t go out…!! I can’t just pretend something like that never existed, you know!”
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「俺を見てろよ。。。!!エンデヴァー 俺を見てろよ!!!」
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「見てろよ ; mitero yo」-> just you wait and see (as a threat)
「エンデヴァー ; endevaa 」-> Endeavor
「俺 ; ore 」-> I 
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「見てろよ ; mitero yo」-> just you wait and see (as a threat)
= “Just look at me…!! Endeavor, just look at me!!!”
So mitero yo is an expression meaning “just you wait and see” and it consists of the imperative form on miteru (= you must be looking) and the yo emphasizes this more. “Just you wait and see” obviously sounds far more threatening (because it is) and also kind of makes sense when considering where they are now in the present time. Now - fifteen years or so later - Endeavor sees him. This goes back to the earlier part where Dabi said “Watch me from the depths of hell” - it’s a different form (in that part he says mitekure, while here he says mitero yo) but he’s always telling his family to look at him. Because, at the end of the day, that’s where it all went wrong. No one ever truly saw him and his pain until one day, he broke. What exactly is a child supposed to do? Endeavor has gotten away with not looking for too long, but Dabi won’t let him go on like that anymore.
And notice how he says the same line twice here? And in the middle he says “Endeavor” - for the first time, he addresses him by his hero name instead of calling him dad. This is because he isn’t just asking his father to look at him, but he’s also threatening Endeavor. I think this might actually hint that he’s already having thoughts of turning into a villain? Maybe he already thought about what it would be like to just turn himself into a villain and refuse Endeavor from reaching his goals just as Endeavor has refused Touya from reaching his goals. Whether he actively thought about this or whether that was more of a subconscious feeling is hard to say but it’s clear that at that point he already viewed Endeavor, the hero, as the bad guy that took his father away from him. If it wasn’t for Endeavor, the hero, then Touya wouldn’t have to prove his worth to his father by having a strong quirk.
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「一番辛いのはあなたじゃないし。あの子を見なかったのはあなただけじゃない。」
「一番 ; ichiban 」-> the most; number one
「辛い ; tsurai 」-> painful; difficult (emotionally)
「のは ; no wa」-> nominalizer + topic marker
「あなた ; anata 」-> you
「じゃない ; janai 」-> aren’t
「し ; shi 」-> emphasizes the point you make
「あの ; ano 」-> that
「子 ; ko 」-> child
「を ; o 」-> direct object marker
「見なかった ; minakatta 」-> didn’t look
「のは ; no wa」-> nominalizer + topic marker
「あなた ; anata 」-> you
「だけ ; dake 」-> only
「じゃない ; janai 」-> aren’t
= “You are not the one with the most pain. You aren’t the only one that didn’t look at that child.”
This is another line where some people claimed the official translation made Rei sound harsher than she actually is. But I don’t think she’s even being harsh here? She’s just stating a fact. And just compare the two of them real quick: Rei just got out of the mental hospital she stayed in for ten years and upon finding out what really happened with Touya, immediately took responsibility and decided to do something. Endeavor, on the other hand, is crying in his hospital bed because suddenly he regrets that he failed as a parent for over twenty years. I don’t think she’s being harsh by telling him that he isn’t the one who is hurting the most when that’s just a fact. And the “you don’t get to claim” phrasing of the official translation isn’t really harsh, it’s just being direct. But Endeavor is a grown man and with all the pain he has caused his family, I think he can deal with not being handled like some fragile little thing.
What I find interesting about this line is that it’s essentially a continuation to what she said in the last chapter when she stated that “Everyone else is having those feelings a lot more than you” Now, she is adding to that because not only has the rest of the family suffered a lot more than Endeavor, but one person in particular - Touya - is currently in the most amount of pain out of any of them. Endeavor’s self-pity and regrets have no space here because Touya is the actual victim here, and not Endeavor for having been exposed for something he chose to do for over two decades.
They both never looked at that child, but now it’s time to change that and finally start looking at him.
There weren’t really a lot of changes in the translation - aside from our now Spanish-speaking amigo, Dabi - but there’s still a lot to talk about, as you can see by this very very long post. So if you read all of this, thank you! And also congrats for making it through! There’s always nuance that just doesn’t translate but is still important to mention and gives a better insight into the characters. This chapter was just the first part so chapter 302 will surely give us some more clarity, possibly even finally revealing what actually happened on the day Touya supposedly died. So now let’s see what the next chapter will bring. 
Adios~
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sjmsstuff · 3 years
Text
Light And Dark
Chapter 5
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4
Warnings: same as always x
A/N: Here ya go folks! I rewrote this chapter twice and I still kind of hate it but it is what it is, enjoy!
Her first kiss. Gwyn kept her back pressed against the cool wood of the door. It was several seconds before she felt Azriel’s presence moving back down the hall.
She let out a long breath, and clapped a hand to her mouth to stifle the giggle that seemed to be forcing its way out.
Her first kiss and it was Azriel.
The shadowsinger, the big bad Illyrian spymaster.
It was the powerful male who cut people down without hesitation. The one who others whispered about.
The one who had held her so softly in the morning light. The one who had taken her hand so hesitantly as they walked through the halls...
The one she had to see for training tomorrow morning.
Nesta and Cassian would probably be missing, presumably still in bed. Emerie would be absent too if her friends smudged lipstick was anything to go by.
It was funny, Gwyn didn’t remember Emerie wearing lipstick earlier in the night, but when she came back after disappearing for two hours, Gwyn had politely pointed out the smudged crimson on her lips. A crimson that suited a ruffled blonde who entered the hall minutes later.
Gwyn couldn’t blame Mor, Emerie had looked fabulous in an orange gown tonight, wings gleaming, and hair braided with her Valkyrie ribbon. The blonde didn’t stand a chance.
Neither did Emerie apparently, as she disappeared with the Morrigan minutes before Gwyn herself had left the gathering.
Nesta too had been striking in a midnight gown. She had gotten ready in her own rooms. And if the the smug male air around Cassian was anything to go by, she had had to get ready a second time as well.
Gwyn was truly happy for her friends. Even if her only comforts were smutty novels, thoughts of scarred hands and her own fingers.
Alone with Azriel tomorrow. Maybe he’d pretend nothing happened. Maybe she should pretend nothing happened.
It was only earlier tonight she had been furious with him for ignoring her. It was embarrassment that truly fueled her anger, but the point remained that he had ignored her for three days.
It was Nesta’s idea to dance with another male tonight. Jurian was the first to offer, but when she looked up from her dance with the human, Azriel was simply in conversation with Rhysand.
So she drank and danced on. Only when he had slipped into a quiet hallway did she decide to follow him.
He was leaning against the wall when she rounded the corner. He had immediately uncrossed his arms, tucking his hands behind his back, under those magnificent wings.
Then she had taken his hidden hand and they had walked until her doorway. Then she had kissed him and everything seemed to fit into place.
Fit so perfectly that Gwyn had to flee before she decided to discover how other things would fit.
***
Morning dawned cold and grey. Gwyn slid into her leathers, ignoring the headache pounding through her temples. The other priestesses were attending an early morning mass, their own celebration of Starfall. Which meant it was only Azriel who stood in the early morning light.
The shadows clambered over his shoulders to reach out to her. She waved at one and could have sworn it waved back.
Azriel was fumbling with the handle of a sword, he quickly turned his back to her and Gwyn walked over to begin her stretches.
She began her own drills as Azriel ran through his. It had been about an hour and neither had said a word.
It was getting too awkward.
“Would you like to spar?” Her question cut through the chilly air like a sharp blade through paper.
Azriel started where he stood slicing at an invisible foe. “Of course.”
He replaced his sword on the rack and Gwyn quickly cast her own blade aside.
She had been suggesting sparring with steel but Azriel clearly wanted hand to hand combat.
They entered the small circle on the ground from opposite sides. A few feet away from him but she could’ve sworn she heard his heartbeat.
A blush was high across his cheekbones, probably from exertion, and it deepened as their eyes met.
Gwyn moved first, a feint, then a strike low to the abdomen. Azriel saw the move coming and his wings flared as he stepped out to dodge. Another strike but it glanced off his chest.
It was Gwyn’s turn to duck as a swing came next, then she was in close, fists ready to strike and the world tilted.
Gwyn slammed into the hard earth and rolled. She swept Azriels feet from under him, then swung herself over his hips.
Face to face, him pinned beneath her, hands bracketed in scarred hands. He didn’t even fight, just stared up at her. Breathing each other in. Feeling every inch of where they touched.
“Well done.” Azriel’s voice was oddly rough.
Gwyn unfroze and jumped up reaching out a hand to help him up. This had the fortunate side affect of placing them face to face while both vertical
Or rather face to chest as he was significantly taller than her.
Gwyn was being an idiot. He hadn’t said a word about the incident last night and she was still furious at him for… something. Her memory seemed to be impaired by his proximity.
Taking initiative, Gwyn stepped backwards, turned swiftly and snatched back up her blade from where she had left it. This occupied her hands so they would not find their way into his hair.
“With steel this time?” Gwyn’s voice sounded strained to her own ears, but Azriel seemed not to notice as he strode to retrieve his own weapon.
He fumbled slightly with the hilt again. If anything Gwyn would suppose he seemed nervous.
That was extremely unlikely. They’d sparred hundreds of times and he’d been to wars and back. Perhaps his shadows had whispered some dangerous information to him that he was still in shock over.
He seemed to gather himself, then marched resolutely over to her. She readied her stance but he didn’t even raise his sword.
Azriel merely stood in front of her and opened his mouth.
Then closed it again.
Then opened it again.
This time he managed words. “I understand that you were tipsy last night, and that you may not even remember, but we kissed. You kissed me. By your door. Of your room.”
Gods was he embarrassed?
“I just thought,” He hurried on, “I’d let you know that should you want me to completely forget that happened, I will forget. Well maybe not forget but I swear I will never mention it again, and should-“
“Azriel,” Gwyn gripped his arm, “I was aware of my actions last night. I apologise if I put you in an uncomfortable situation-“
“No!” Azriel exclaimed, “No, not at all, I wasn’t uncomfortable, I just didn’t want to put you in an awkward position.”
He was blushing and that somehow emboldened her. Perhaps it was the hangover and leftover lowered inhibitions.
“Azriel, you can put me in any position you would like.”
His head snapped up, eyes darkening.
He stepped closer.
They were almost nose to nose.
“You, Gwyneth Berdara, are dangerous.”
She smiled softly.
His gaze dipped to her mouth.
His hand reached towards her cheek.
It drew back.
A noise behind her on the stairs.
Azriel’s eyes flicked over her shoulder and he stepped away.
“Azriel, Gwyn. I hope we’re not interrupting anything.”
Gwyn spun to see Nesta and Emerie climbing up the stairs.
“We can come back… if you…”
“No,” Azriel’s voice was low as he pushed past her, “I’m leaving now anyway” He turned back at the top of the stairs, “Goodbye Gwyn” Gwyn was close to punching her friends.
All malice washed away however, when Azriel had disappeared into the darkness of the house and the other Valkyries descended into fits of giggles.
Nesta was the first to surface, “Gwyn! What the fuck were you two doing up here?”
“Sparring,” came the indignant response. “Just training and drills!”
“Oh I’m sure,” drawled Emerie, “That’s why I can smell the arousal hanging thicker than cream in this air.”
Nesta snorted, “Must have been some very interesting drills.”
A/N: ooooo it’s heating up. Someone guide the two of them, they’re helpless.
Tag list: @bookstantrash @perseusannabeth @champanheandluxxury @sayosdreams @booksloverforlife @princessofmerchants @princessofmerchants-reads @azrielsshadowsdanceforgwyn @illyrian-valkyrie @lovelywordsandwine @thron3ofbooks @velaaaris @gwynkyrie @acourtofmidnightsnacks @simpforfictionalmenandwomen @bittermuire @mirubyai @velvetrays @tealnymph24 @dealingdifferentdevils @siyeoncruella @spookylightkidranch @cantkeepmyeyesoffofyou-x @claukiki @maja2801 @madie2200 @zaffydee @allisonmb2017
Chapter 6
Let me know if you want to be added or removed from the tag list for this fic or my writing in general x
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robininthelabyrinth · 3 years
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Delight in Misery (ao3) - part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6
- Chapter 7 -
“Why are you covered in feathers?” Jiang Cheng asked, and then immediately afterward added, “On second thought, don’t tell me, I don’t want to know.”
Lan Wangji checked himself over and brushed off the few feathers that had ended up on his shoulder. “Are there any others?” he asked solemnly. “They might be evidence.”
Jiang Cheng’s eye twitched, as Lan Wangji had intended. “I don’t want to know,” he repeated, and Lan Wangji believed it about as much as he’d believed it the first time Jiang Cheng said it – which was to say, not at all. “I don’t want to…okay, fine, tell me.”
“You don’t want to know,” Lan Wangji informed him, and Jiang Cheng looked as though he was considering strangling him. “I will explain later. For the moment, it is best to pretend as if you know nothing.”
“I really don’t know anything,” Jiang Cheng said.
“That will make pretending easier.”
Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes at him, but stopped arguing, and Lan Wangji felt warmth in his belly at the instant capitulation. All of his life experiences had conspired to make Jiang Cheng an untrusting person, suspicious almost to the point of paranoia and constantly afraid of losing everything to the unknown, and yet he chose to trust Lan Wangji without question.
“Is there anything else I should know?” Jiang Cheng asked with one of his friendlier scowls, crossing his arms over his chest. “Or not know, as the case may be?”
Lan Wangji considered for a moment. “Don’t count the number of Jiang sect disciples leaving with you,” he suggested, and Jiang Cheng’s eyebrows shot up. “Consider storming out in a fury the next time someone insults you.”
“You were right,” Jiang Cheng said. “I didn’t want to know.”
Lan Wangji heard footsteps and put his hands behind his back. “Naturally, Sect Leader Jiang is entitled to change his mind. I understand it happens often.”
Jiang Cheng’s eyes narrowed. “You must be struggling with coming out of seclusion, Hanguang-jun,” he remarked. “To come mucking around with the rest of us after spending so long on - avoiding worldly matters, let’s say.”
The sect leaders passing by sped up with expressions suggesting that they were dreadfully curious but did not want to get involved in a repeat of the fight that was rather infamously had throughout the Lotus Pier, with all of the attendant property damage (that they’d paid for later, but still).
Once they’d passed, Lan Wangji gave Jiang Cheng a look that suggested he did not appreciate the joke. Jiang Cheng appeared undeterred.
He also appeared, on closer examination, somewhat tired.
Lan Wangji frowned and stepped closer, lowering his voice. “You have not slept.”
“I’m fine,” Jiang Cheng said, and realized his mistake at once – such excess vehemence meant that he was lying, and badly, too. “It’s your fault, anyway.”
“My fault?”
“Entirely your fault. I can’t eat my lunch without wondering why you’re not plucking away on your guqin the way you normally do at that hour, I can’t finish my paperwork without trying to find you to ask for your views, I can’t sleep without hearing you making noise next door…who made you fit yourself in so well at the Lotus Pier?”
“You,” Lan Wangji said dryly, ignoring the warmth he felt. Surely it was wrong to feel touched when someone’s unhealthy co-dependence with you was mentioned. “When you kidnapped me.”
“It was only technically kidnapping,” Jiang Cheng grumbled. “And only at first, anyway…really, it’s no big deal. Just had a few bad nights.”
Jiang Cheng’s nights fell on a scale between decent, mediocre, bad, and genuinely horrific, and he generally only conceded that something was ‘bad’ when it fell toward the lower end of the scale – when his thoughts kept scattering like a flock of bird being chased off their perch, returning to circle around sore subjects and drill worries into his skull, when there would be blood and bile and panic and his mind would linger on anxieties he had long ago put aside in the light of day.
He hadn’t had one of those in months – and now he had had a few?
“Because I…?”
Jiang Cheng shook his head. “A-Ling had a temper tantrum last week,” he explained, voice low and more than a little helpless. “I think he misses you and A-Yuan, and he’s at the age for pushing his boundaries, too…he told me that his Wei-jiujiu wouldn’t have made him eat his vegetables.”
He would have, of course, Lan Wangji reflected. He remembered how Wei Wuxian had been with A-Yuan, always mercilessly teasing him. Wei Wuxian had a spine when it came to children, one that wouldn’t crack into a thousand pieces at the first sob – that was Jiang Cheng, who was all bluster and bark without the slightest bit of bite.
But that wasn’t the issue, not when Jiang Cheng’s soul was a patchwork of ragged wounds and insecurity, a lifetime of being second-best and second-loved, and on his worst days he would voice doubts that he’d even been esteemed as much as that.
By his father, by his mother, by his sister, by Wei Wuxian himself –  
“Maybe he would’ve done better,” Jiang Cheng murmured, his eyes already blank with self-hatred – no doubt this was what had kept him up on those bad nights, the angry whispers of a too-fragile mind that said why did he leave me, why wasn’t I good enough, he said he’d stay by my side and then took the first chance he could to leave me behind, that said it couldn’t have been him that did all those things and betrayed me like that, no, he must have died earlier on and it was my fault for not noticing, that said if it’s all my fault then it all makes sense, it’s always because of me, no one ever stays with me.
That said if it’s my fault then it’ll happen again.
Lan Wangji did not like those nights.
“Mm,” he said mildly. “And then A-Ling would also know how to hide dirty pictures in awkward places.”
Lan Wangji had never been good at comforting people, having always been the one being comforted, and his failure to convey his feelings to Wei Wuxian during his life spoke volumes regarding his ability to communicate – but he knew Jiang Cheng.
After so long living together, he knew him.
(Jiang Cheng wasn’t the only one who had difficulty sleeping without those familiar sounds next door.)
Sure enough, Jiang Cheng choked, his eyes clearing up, and he spent the next few breaths struggling not to burst out laughing. “We’re supposed to be arguing,” he hissed at Lan Wangji, who smirked – from a distance it would certainly look as though they were arguing, Jiang Cheng’s cheeks all red and his shoulders shaking in what a stranger might mistake for rage. “You stone-faced bastard, that’s not funny.”
Lan Wangji disagreed. Jiang Cheng’s reaction was, in fact, extremely funny.
“We will need to diversify our collection of such things,” Lan Wangji said thoughtfully. “Given the inclinations of our future house guest…”
“I am not buying Mo Xuanyu pictures of – ! He can buy it himself if he wants…wait, you’re really planning to have him come with us?”
“He will die if he remains,” Lan Wangji said simply, because it was that simple. Their conversation, however brief, had been extremely informative. “And so he must not remain. We have concocted a plan.”
“We? I wasn’t involved in this.”
“Myself, and Nie Huaisang.”
Lan Wangji was expecting some sort of reaction to that – what, he wasn’t sure, possibly disbelief or ridicule or even panic that they were entrusting themselves to the most useless fop to grace the current generation of cultivators – but instead Jiang Cheng relaxed, looking pleased. “Oh, well, Nie Huaisang,” he said, as if that explained anything at all.
“You trust him?”
Jiang Cheng shrugged. “I don’t not trust him?” he hazarded, and seemed rather helplessly puzzled by his own ease with the situation. “He’s terrible at anything a sect heir ought to be good at, but he’ll come up with the wildest sort of things if it’s nonsense he’s after, and he usually gets his way in the end. He’s a pretty good judge as to how likely his chances at success are, too.”
“He’s smarter than he looks,” Lan Wangji agreed, his voice neutral.
“Don’t tell me you fell for his ‘who, me, a person capable of doing anything, surely not’ act,” Jiang Cheng said, looking vastly amused. Lan Wangji might normally object to such teasing, but if it got Jiang Cheng away from his dangerous self-hatred, he’d take it – even if the idea that Jiang Cheng, master of obliviousness, had correctly judged a person that he himself had misjudged seemed just plain wrong. “He just does that to anyone he thinks might squeal on him to his brother.”
Lan Wangji probably would have, too. Still, he felt that Jiang Cheng should have warned him better.
He glared.
“Second Young Master Lan has no grounds for complaining at his own lack of perception,” Jiang Cheng said, and Lan Wangji noted again the presence of people in their vicinity. “It’s all that navel-gazing you do in the Cloud Recesses, no doubt – should I start to worry about A-Yuan?”
“Lan Yuan,” Lan Wangji said snippily, then added, “Lan Sizhui.”
Jin Rulan, Jiang Cheng mouthed at him, and both of them were forced to briefly avert their faces in sheer amusement. Poor Jin Ling – no one would ever call him by his courtesy name, not if even his two guardians weren’t able to keep a straight face.
(Well, comparatively speaking. Lan Wangji was well aware that his own expression of deep amusement looked, to the uninitiated, exactly like his neutral expression but for a very slight narrowing of the eyes.)
The footsteps passed, and Jiang Cheng relaxed once more. Lan Wangji was pleased to see it, but acknowledged that if they were to keep up the pretense of disliking each other, deplorable political necessity that it was, they would need to do better in the future.
“Today will be a disaster,” Lan Wangji murmured, a warning. “But beneficial in the long run. Do not take what they say to heart.”
He would not have said it if Jiang Cheng was not more fragile than usual. Normally, Jiang Cheng could, after years of practice, let insults flow off his back like water from a duck, unmoving and uncaring – he was a flawed man in many ways, Lan Wangji acknowledged, but he generally only had to make a mistake once to learn from it.
For instance, he would never again allow the poisoned words of others to interfere with those he loved.
Not when he still tormented himself for not having done more for Wei Wuxian, as if there had been more Jiang Cheng could have done without losing everything else he held dear – not even Lan Wangji, who was helplessly and hopelessly in love with Wei Wuxian and couldn’t keep himself from sometimes playing Inquiry in search of him, summoned his ghost into their lives so often as Jiang Cheng did.
“Sometimes I wonder what goes through your head,” Jiang Cheng remarked, glaring at the perceived commentary about his lack of emotional resiliency no matter how accurate. “And then I realize I don’t want to know.”
“Lying is forbidden.”
“I am not a Lan. And, yes, fine, it’s a lie. If I could crack you open and crawl into your head, I probably would, but that doesn’t make you special or anything. I’d do that to most people.”
Lan Wangji believed it – Jiang Cheng was just that insecure.
He didn’t let Jiang Cheng change the subject, though, continuing to stare at him until Jiang Cheng shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other, rolling his eyes. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll prepare for a calamity and storm out as quickly as possible. What are they possibly going to say about me now?”
They said he was like his father.
It was usually meant as a compliment, but not always. In this case, it was the latter: the implication that Jiang Cheng would, like his father, eventually forget to care for the child he already had when another, better one came along put an especially ugly expression on his face.
As Nie Huaisang had gleefully predicted, Jin Guangshan was enraged to the point of maddening by the prank they had pulled and framed Mo Xuanyu for. Nor could he be blamed, the prank was positive infantile, and highlighted Mo Xuanyu’s relative youth and immaturity, losing his father and sect face in the process. Everyone had wanted to talk about that, about how extremely obvious it was that Mo Xuanyu’s only use was to humiliate the already legitimized Jin Guangyao, but in deference to their host they turned their conversation onto past examples like Jiang Fengmian – and, of course, the more recent example of the ongoing fight between Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji over Lan Sizhui.
Jiang Cheng had had no choice but to ignore it, no matter how his face purpled in rage at the suggestion that he might neglect either Lan Sizhui or Jin Ling in favor of the other.  Still, no one had really questioned it when he left in a huff not long after in response to an extremely unfortunate comment by the ever-feckless Nie Huaisang (of course: Lan Wangji shouldn’t have doubted him) about the ability of young men to handle child-rearing, returning to the Lotus Pier in a fury with a parting shot about how the Lotus Pier, at least, did not follow the Wen sect in encouraging the indoctrination of children – a vicious and unwarrented smear regarding the Lan sect’s lectures that made Lan Qiren almost visibly see red and Lan Xichen frown but which Lan Wangji thought was rather useful to their ultimate goal.
When later it was discovered that Mo Xuanyu had apparently run away – and based on the clues that had been left behind, that he must have pulled off his escape by disguising himself as part of Jiang Cheng’s retinue – Jin Guangshan was so angry that smoke nearly poured out of his ears, to the point that Jin Guangyao hastily came up with some excuse to briefly remove him from the scene.
Nie Huaisang winked at Lan Wangji from behind his fan, looking pleased with himself, and he looked so ridiculous that Lan Wangji had to forcefully remind himself once again of his personal revelation that the second young master of Qinghe Nie was far away from being the useless waste that he presented himself as.
Far more effective a reminder, though, was Jin Guangshan’s announcement later that day that he would indulge Mo Xuanyu’s desire for a little bit of freedom – natural in a boy of that age, he’d chuckled, playing the indulgent father – by requesting that Jiang Cheng keep him for some time at the Lotus Pier to tutor his young cousin Jin Ling in the ways of Lanling Jin.
Just as Nie Huaisang had so enthusiastically and confidently said he would.
“And with Hanguang-jun there to supervise, there will be no question of misconduct,” Chifeng-zun said, nodding in approval at the proposal. “Your son and grandson will benefit twice over! I think our younger generation is stronger for having all gathered together in one place, whether learning at the Cloud Recesses or resisting the oppression of the Wen sect…”
“That requires there to be a younger generation,” someone in the crowd interjected, as they almost always did when someone of their present generation mentioned the next. “Sect Leader Nie, don’t you think it’s time you settled down?”
“Why are you looking to me?” he demanded, looking annoyed. “Zewu-jun is equally unattached, and he ranks first on the list of women’s hearts, doesn’t he?”
“On the list of young masters, of which I no longer count,” Lan Xichen stressed hastily, holding up his hands in a vain attempt to ward off the discussion topic. “At any rate, I’m far too busy to be interested in courting at the moment – anyway, wasn’t Sandu Shengshou trying to set up a match some time back?”
“Didn’t he get blackballed?” Sect Leader Qin, ever Jin Guangshan’s faithful dog, interjected, always on the look-out for a way to denigrate the other Great Sects. “I didn’t even know that was possible –”
“At least he’s demonstrated the ability to care for a child –”
Lan Wangji decided that that was an excellent time to make his escape. This was one situation in which he especially did not want to get held up as a positive comparison.
His uncle went with him.
“Very cleverly done,” Lan Qiren remarked as they strolled into one of the many gardens that peppered Lanling City and Jinlin Tower in particular, and Lan Wangji looked at him sidelong. “Matchmaking and children are the favorite subjects of old men; by the time the noise dies down, Sect Leader Jin’s decision as to his newest son will be considered as settled and unquestionable. It was good of your brother – and Chifeng-zun, of course – to throw themselves on their swords for you.”
Lan Wangji put his hands behind his back, uncomfortable. “I did not ask them to act.”
His uncle said nothing. He didn’t need to – if perhaps Chifeng-zun was somewhat opaque to them both, his sheer straightforwardness ironically enough serving to conceal any subtle thoughts he might have, Lan Xichen was as clear as a calm lake. He had jumped into the conversation at just the right moment, saying words that would only inflame the situation rather than calm it, displaying just enough dismay to be humorous without actually appearing, to those that knew him well, to be surprised at all.
“It was Nie Huaisang’s idea,” Lan Wangji added, and that did get Lan Qiren’s eyebrows to rise up in surprise. Probably wondering, just as Lan Wangji was, when exactly Nie Huaisang had had the opportunity to rope the Venerated Triad into his scheme – as far as Lan Wangji could tell, he hadn’t had any opportunity to speak to them.
Still, however intriguing the speculation was, it wasn’t enough to dissuade his uncle from his target.  
“The motivation was yours,” he said, the question implicit.
“Mo Xuanyu requested Jiang Cheng’s assistance,” Lan Wangji explained. “He is – unhappy, in Lanling, and ill-suited to it. Jiang Cheng feared that he might one day bring harm upon himself if he remained.”
His uncle nodded slowly, looking thoughtful. “Having him at the Lotus Pier to teach Jin Ling the ways of Lanling Jin also means that there is no urgent need for Jin Ling to return to Lanling himself. He can remain with Sect Leader Jiang.”
“Yes.”
His uncle huffed out a breath and leaned down to smell one of the flowers. “I will give you some books before you return to the Lotus Pier,” he said. “Mo Xuanyu is already past thirteen; it is not at all the same as dealing with small children. You will need to be prepared.”
Lan Wangji looked at his uncle, a little surprised. He had expected more resistance to this scheming plot, which was not at all in line with Lan sect principles.
“Mo Xuanyu is old enough to make his own decisions,” his uncle said, his eyes still fixed on the flower. “If he cannot happy here, he should go to where he can be.”
Lan Wangji’s heart trembled within his chest. He’d thought – his uncle, who had led the charge at the Burial Mounds, who had been the most disappointed at all of his choices–
“I am sorry that we did not suit you, Wangji.”
Lan Wangji exhaled, hard, feeling a stinging feeling in his eyes and nose.
He had not expected an apology.
It didn’t change everything all at once, of course. He was still angry, still spiteful, still furious, fill of bile and bone-deep rage at how his own family had so thoroughly failed to trust in him that they would take away even his right to choose. His belly was heavy with his resentment at how they disapproved of him, how they were ashamed of him, and it would take more than mere words to liberate him from it.
But still, he had to admit – there was something more complicated about it now.
It had been easier, he thought, to be merely angry.
“It was not you,” he said, a small concession. “If the circumstances were different, I could have lived my whole life at the Cloud Recesses with no dissatisfaction.”
“But they aren’t,” his uncle said, bowing his head in understanding. “And you can’t. I – do not understand, and I do not like it, but that is not necessary. It is still my dearest wish for you to be happy and safe.”
Lan Wangji wasn’t sure that being truly happy was possible in a world that lacked Wei Wuxian – a world his uncle had helped bring about with his own two hands – but he knew that the life he had built with Jiang Cheng in the Lotus Pier, warm and tightly packed and full of worries as it was, was as close as he would come, and a life of solitude and distance and tranquility at the Cloud Recesses would only be worse.
“I have another month left before I return,” he pointed out, seeking to change the subject.
“Not after that conversation,” Lan Qiren said, looking reluctantly amused. “You will be sent to the Lotus Pier as soon as can be managed to make sure that everyone is being properly supervised.”
“Jiang Cheng can supervise.”
“Jiang Wanyin won’t.”
Lan Wangji bowed his head to hide a smile. His uncle wasn’t wrong.
And he had to admit - he wouldn’t miss Jiang Cheng dealing with a teenager for the world.
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alignallofthelights · 3 years
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Social Media Trending Analysis: Walker vs. DeanCasWedding
Social Media Metrics for Duke 1x05
Now that it’s the next day after the premiere of Duke, the fifth episode of the first season of Walker, I wanted to share the insights I found. Last night #Walker trended to #3 at United States Twitter Trending Top 30. During the course of the evening the show accumulated an excess of 12.3K, some additional hash-tags that trended during the course of the live tweeting included: #SendLoveToTexas and #Micki. 
It’s come to my attention that during the live tweeting a Destiel fan posted some information concerning the social media analysis which directly compared the #DeanCasWedding to #Walker. I will share the tweet for ease of reference. 
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As you can see there are a number of issues with this data/cross analysis. I’ll begin to go through them point by point and then do a cross comparison of the two campaigns side by side. 
First and foremost you will see from the tweet in question that the poster did a 7-Day analysis between #Walker and #DeanCasWedding. This means that during the time #Walker was trending they completed a report that ran from 2/12-2/18. For those who are unaware #DeanCasWedding trended on 2/14, and Walker airs regularly on Thursdays. The past two Thursdays were 2/11 and 2/18. The poster is comparing a 7 Day analysis of a hash-tag to one that surges on Thursday during a live-tweet. The author is comparing apples to oranges. 
Secondly, Nielsen and Networks, don’t care about 7 Day reports and trends unless they are news programs or soap operas who have content being shared with public audiences every day or every week. There is no reason for them to monitor chatter in this way. Additionally Nielsen does not care about anything outside of the 7 hour airing window of the show in question. For example if you want your tweets to count towards the network/show and Nielsen’s top tweeted shows and your show of preference airs at 8 PM, only tweets from 5 PM - 12 AM will count towards the shows social media presence. Networks and content providers don’t care about anything outside of those hours. Which again shows how meaningless a 7-Day report is for social media concerning television series, and why I won’t track hash-tags outside of the day/time it trends. 
Now that those quick details have been addressed, I’m going to do a side-by-side analysis of the two hash-tags when they trended on the dates in question #DeanCasWedding on 2/14 and #Walker during the live tweet of 2/18. For those who are interested in seeing my original report on the DeanCasWedding trend data it’s here for reference. 
#DeanCasWedding
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As shared before this is the most important data from the #DeanCasWedding. It trended on Twitter’s United States Trending Top 30 at #4 on 2/14, and generated a collective 46.3K tweets before it stopped trending at around 10-11PM EST. As mentioned before this campaign had a very high retweet threshold 67%, and a very high portion of the contributors had accounts that have been active for less than 1 year (26%), this is a high indication of sock puppet accounts/fake accounts. The average Destiel fan account tweeted 5-8 times on average to make the hash tag trend over the course of the 10-11 hours, with some of the top contributors tweeting an excess of 400 times. All this is provided in the report shared earlier.  
What does that mean? I want to zero in on the contributors column and the reach, because this is the heart of it all. Although they had 5.3k people contribute to their campaign the conversation was very insular, that means that the people tweeting likely had the same audience, same followership, and in general the same handles talking back and forth in a very small pool of people trading comments between one another. I will do a comparison to #Walker’s premiere later on because it’s the only other campaign I have record of that had a similar tweet threshold and trended for around the same time (During it’s premiere #Walker and #Jared Padalecki trended for 15 hours, peaked at #4 on Twitter’s Top 30, and generated 59.6K tweets). 
The bottom line here is that even though #DeanCasWedding was able to trend the substance is not meaningful due to the factors of reach, retweeting non-original content and sock accounts polluting the tag with what networks really value which is eye-balls reaching the tag and new people either learning or engaging with show/content. 
#Walker (1x05, “Duke”)
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Looking at the data side by side, you will begin to notice a few differences. Some are intuitive. #DeanCasWedding had more tweets 43.6k to Walker’s Duke 12.3k, and as such they had more tweets and contributors. This makes sense, the hash tag trended longer, and Duke is in episode 5. However look at the reach between each of these campaigns. 
Duke’s Walker was able to reach 6.5 Million people, compared to DeanCasWedding’s 3 Million. Again this 12.3K+ tweet hash tag that trended for a handful of hours when the episode aired, was able to out reach a hashtag that trended for 10-11 hours on a Sunday with less competition, and on a day where people have more disposable time. This was also in light of Texas going through a major power outage, and understandable concern in addition to more topics taking light away from Walker (understandably and rightly so I may add). 
What this shows is that the individuals who are contributing to the Walker hash tag are diversified, meaning they have different account followings, different accounts who are live tweeting, and that the reach of these individuals is beyond that of Supernatural, and that they are engaging with more people overall. Even though Walker had ~30K less tweets than #DeanCasWedding the economical value of this hash tag is greater because of the reach, and the fact that the contributors are truly diverse from each other (i.e. they are all not retweeting and retargeting towards the same audiences, and double dipping and speaking with the same accounts). 
This can be seen in the number of original tweets created during each campaign. Walker’s Duke had 6.2K original tweets for a 12.3K hash tag, while DeanCasWedding had 13.7K original tweets for a 46.3K hash tag. 
Here is another interesting factor, the age of the twitter accounts who participated in this hash tag are lower than the DeanCasWedding one, showing the likelihood for less fake accounts. Walker has 18% of these newer accounts, while DeanCasWedding has 26%. Again why does a Destiel have so many users with less than 1 year accounts when the ship has existed for 13 years?  
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Conclusion
What’s my point with this? Just because something has a high tweet count doesn’t mean it’s actually valuable as a social media campaign. It’s more important to go deeper into the data and understand who is interacting and how they are interacting. The number of tweets is just a small portion of a larger picture. 
I’m going to make my last point here because I know the Extreme Destiel fans are children and they will likely only look at the contributors column and boast how they have more people tweet over their campaign (ignoring the fact that it  took them weeks for several of the content creators to prepare for the date in question, and that they jumped on the fandom wagon from Samantha and Chad with the Roadhouse AU twitter roleplay), and so I want to dispel the notion here by sharing the Walker Premiere data. 
Walker Premiere
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As mentioned above the Walker premiere trended for 15 hours on January 21st, peaked at #4 on the Twitter Trending Top 30, and generated 59.6K tweets. As you can see here the total contributors for the premiere far out scale and outweigh any numbers of the Destiel fan made wedding, and ultimately this is the reason why I don’t think any of their smear campaigns, jealousy and angry tweeting matter. The economic value of Walker is more than 7 times greater than the value of Destiel. 
When you compare similar scaling trends it’s clear #Walker is way bigger than Destiel is. 9.2K contributors, 5k individuals creating original content during the premiere, a retweet rate of 3-4, and wait for the K.O.
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Look at that reach. 102 Million for Walker vs. 3 Million for Destiel. To further add salt to the wound: 
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Minimal to no bot accounts. 
#micdrop
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sokkagatekeeper · 2 years
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mai — INTJ (NiTeFiSe)
Ni: introverted intuition is not a superpower but it could be. mai has a sharp abilily to sit down, observe, and wait. this allows her both a survival method in her strict homelife, and a very precise and unique understanding of the world around her. unlike azula (who uses Ne) mai isn’t usually versatile when things go unexpectedly, but we can’t say she’s surprised when it happens, either. her readings are nuanced but usually at least partially correct. mainly with ty lee, whom she understands as both having azula wrapped around her finger and wrapped around azula’s finger herself, which is not that acurrate but it’s still more acurrate than azula’s understanding of ty lee. without even trying (because she never lies; she puts layers and layers of disinterest and misery over her actual personality until no one and not even her can tell the difference anymore) she has everyone fooled into thinking she’s always in control of herself, always rational about the situations she finds herself into, even when that’s objectively untrue.
Te: because mai is so good at observing and staying in the background as things play out, the way she behaves during the boiling rock p2 is surprising because she isn’t usually that impulsive or even active in general if it isn’t in her own self-interest, but in a way it’s easy to understand why and how she does it. not only narratively and interms of character, but in her fighting method in general: she’s always waiting for the perfect moment to strike, and when she finds it, she takes it. her morality isn’t her strong point exactly because her Fi (values) is so underdeveloped. so yes, she is an observer most of the time, but when she finds the perfect moment to strike, she takes it without hesitating. that’s extroverted thinking babey!!!
Fi: as i mentioned earlier, her introverted feeling is very underdeveloped and so Te which is all action and objective truth tends to crush most of the sense of morality in her (which is why estj is Like That), so she’s always acting in her own self-interest. however, mai is still extremely nice for the circumstances she finds herself in, and her betrayal of azula in order to save zuko comes from her very own moral code, to put it that way. she usually doesn’t enjoy talking about or expressing her feelings but she longs for a sincere, real connection and most of all an emotional truth, which no one has ever given to her. when zuko gives her one, making that choice at the boiling rock is easy for her. she doesn’t do it because it’s the right thing to do for the war, or the world, or even in her own self-interest, clearly, but because it’s the right thing to do for zuko, whom she cares about, and herself.
Se: this function tends to make the user contemplate at the very least making a few decisions in the heat of the moment (mind the irony i guess) as it’s a very present and immediate function. as mai is always observing, analyzing, and unknowingly making plans, and focusing on her own self-preservation, this turns to be quite difficult for her, but. but. much like she has a moment of sensibility once six months, she has a moment of impulsivity once every one year. mai’s irrational choice at the boiling rock is both a result of 1) how? her setting it all into motion in that specific way because of months of observing and picturing how things would play out, and 2) why? because of the sake of doing what feels right in that moment in particular; what is the immediate course of action that will get tangible results. it only comes out under pressure, and she executes it perfectly.
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teawaffles · 3 years
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The Conspiratorial Bullet: Chapter 7, Part 1
T/N: For the first time, a chapter will have three parts ( ; ω ; ) This is one very long scene..!
TW for this chapter // Mention of death, blood
If there were a hole in the ground, he would dive right into it.
——Is that what one would call this state of mind?
That was what Kevin Curtis thought as he nervously wandered the forest alone.
After they’d bid farewell to Albert, for a while, he and the elderly nobleman Andy had continued walking on with no destination in mind. Then they ran into a couple of nobles from the opposing team, and somehow started shooting at one another; before he knew it, for some reason, he had found himself all alone.
When the fighting started, Kevin had panicked and knocked into Andy. He’d then dropped his revolver somewhere, and descended into an even greater panic. Kevin crawled on the ground to search for it after that, and just as he’d finally found his own gun, the next thing he knew, he was both lost and alone. For about a minute, Kevin had hugged his knees as he fell into despair, such was the height of his misery.
“But it’s a good thing this card was here.”
Kevin spoke to himself, brushing his fingers over the card that had been tied to the revolver. Without it, he wouldn’t have had the confidence to say that the gun he had picked up was his own. On the card, the number 8 was clearly written.
“But what should I do now……?”
He kept going “But, but” over and over as he swayed, repeatedly turning his head to look around him. Even though the forest wasn’t very large, perhaps it was the strangeness of his surroundings that heightened his unease, for it had begun to seem oddly complex and bizarre.
In times like this, if he were here——
The figure of that man rose to his mind: his business partner, Helena’s father, and his best friend.
In contrast to the timid Kevin, he had an endlessly bright and cheerful personality. There were times when Kevin had thought that cheeriness bothersome, but the man was optimistic, and loved a challenge, which meshed well with his own pessimistic and cautious nature. The store they’d opened and run together had been a success, so much so it had grown into an enormous department store.
Why did he just disappear? Kevin knew it was useless to think about it now, but even so, he still couldn’t help but feel that way.
They’d known one another for ten years, yet Kevin hadn’t noticed him being particularly troubled. Their business was progressing smoothly, and it didn’t seem as though he was having problems at home. After Helena had been born, his wife had fallen ill and passed away, but Kevin was certain that he and Helena had come to terms with her passing for a long time now.
Even so, perhaps there was something else that no one knew about, which had been gnawing away at him for some time. Then, why hadn’t he noticed anything? Kevin had asked himself this question many times over as he was interviewed by the Yard.
Of course, there was the line of thought that no one was to blame, and he’d been abducted by someone. In an industry where resentment was common, perhaps there were some people who would resort to such extreme measures — and Kevin had been too careless to anticipate it. Whether he wanted to or not, that incident came to mind. That was why…….
Unconsciously, Kevin’s eyes began to search for the girl he had taken in.
That was why he would at least protect Helena — that was the duty Kevin had taken upon himself. Even after her beloved father had gone missing, Helena had never once lost her outspoken spontaneity, nor shown the slightest sign of grief, and he was staunchly determined to protect that resolute spirit of hers.
“Hm?”
Unexpectedly, his train of thought had been interrupted. Speak of the devil perhaps, or maybe his thoughts alone managed to influence reality. As Kevin stumbled through the forest, before his eyes appeared a lone girl with her back turned to him.
——Was that Helena? From her hairstyle and clothes, it did appear so. Strangely, she was sitting in the tall grass, her back hunched as she hugged her knees. She appeared to be staring intently at something before her, without showing any sign of having noticed Kevin behind her.
He pondered. Now, he and Helena were on opposing teams. Moreover, this girl, who seemed to be Helena, had exposed her back to him, leaving herself full of openings……. In this situation, what was the right thing to do?
If he were to play the part of a kind and generous father, he could call out to her, and let her shoot him on purpose. But he was quite certain that Helena, prideful as she was, would want a serious battle; if she knew he deliberately let her get away, it was inevitable that she would throw a big fuss about it no matter what good intentions he had.
In that case, should he fire on her right now? But then he was worried he might upset her, and just as all sorts of concerns whirled around Kevin’s head, someone thumped a hand on his back.
“………!”
Kevin had almost let out a yelp, but he frantically clapped a hand over his mouth as he spun around. There, he saw Andy Krueger, whom he’d lost sight of in the battle earlier.
The man placed an index finger over his mouth, signalling Kevin to stay quiet, and walked up beside him.
“That’s Helena-kun, isn’t it?”
Andy sounded fairly certain on that, and Kevin lowered his voice as he spoke.
“I just happened to come up behind her, and now I’m not sure if I should shoot.”
Andy gave him a wry smile.
“That’s quite like you. But even though it’s just for fun, you shouldn’t bring parental affection into a fight. Go on, get her before she runs away.”
“A-Alright.”
He had thought of Andy as a compassionate person, but it seemed he also had this surprisingly severe side to him. At the elderly nobleman’s rapid insistence, Kevin was on edge as he aimed his gun at the girl.
“Come on, quickly now,” Andy pressed.
There was no space for objection. Without thinking straight, Kevin pulled the trigger.
——Bang. A sound like a crack resounded through the air.
The recoil was stronger than expected, and Kevin fell on his bottom. Half stunned, he felt a little out of sync: perhaps it was because he was a complete amateur with a firearm.
However, that shot had felt subtly different from the previous times he’d fired his gun. The sense of incongruity that had arisen when he fired the shot, as well as a mysterious unease, both hit him simultaneously. Getting to his feet, Kevin looked at the girl in fear.
The girl lay curled up quietly on the ground. On her back was a huge splash of colour. But it wasn’t the hue of some artificial paint — rather, it was an ominously bright red.
“……Huh?”
That sinister red blotch gradually bloomed across the girl’s back. As he looked on, Kevin tilted his head in a comical motion.
It was the first time he had hit his target: to think, the colour would be as realistic as that. Moreover, the girl had yet to move a muscle. Maybe she was diligently pretending to be dead.
Kevin’s thoughts couldn’t catch up with the reality happening right before his eyes. As he stared ahead in a daze, beside him, the elderly nobleman spoke up in horror.
“Kevin-kun……. Was that, a live bullet?”
At that word, Kevin came back to himself. He looked at his revolver: both his hands were trembling abnormally. No way. Just now—— did he fire a real gun?
“Why? This is a toy, isn’t……”
“Give it here.”
Andy snatched the revolver from his hands. The card with the number 8 fluttered in the air. That’s right. Wasn’t it precisely that card which proved definitively that the gun was the one he’d been given? But even that little hope had been so easily crushed.
After briefly inspecting the gun, Andy gazed at him, wide-eyed.
“This is the real thing. You’ve just shot and killed her.”
His tone was emphatic, as if he were pronouncing judgement upon him. Kevin’s mind was a complete blank, but Andy shook his shoulders and immediately jerked him back to reality.
“You’ve done something terrible now, Kevin-kun! To think, you’ve killed your own child!”
“N—No…… I was just, playing a game—”
“That excuse won’t hold up! You’ve committed murder!”
As Andy shook him over and over, the word “murder” echoed in Kevin’s mind. Certainly, it was as the old man said. No matter what reasons he had, it was an unquestionable, irreversible fact that he had killed someone.
Andy went on volubly at a rapid clip.
“This is bad. If you go on like this, it’ll be your end. A murder conviction will strip you of your wealth, your name — everything. But you’re lucky that I’m the one who witnessed it. First off, let’s hide the body somewhere inconspicuous. Then we’ll make it seem as though Helena simply disappeared, and you can hide away in a foreign country. Once the furore dies down, you can come back; until then, leave the plans for your new store with me.”
“N-Now hold on just a minute!”
Even as he was overwhelmed by the force of Andy’s arguments, Kevin somehow managed to interrupt his proposal.
“We don’t know for sure whether she’s dead. If we give her first aid right away, she might still be saved. And what did you mean about leaving my plans for the store with you? What does the management of my store have to do with you?”
Kevin’s points were valid, but Andy refused to listen.
“Look at her! She hasn’t twitched at all: of course she’s dead! And it’s the same with the store! You’re a murder suspect, while I, a noble, am clearly more trustworthy, so it would be obviously more effective if I were to operate it——”
“——You’re getting a little ahead of yourself, Lord Andy.”
As if he’d been possessed by something, Andy was just making an impassioned speech when a refreshing voice cut him off.
Kevin looked up, and caught sight of a man standing behind Andy.
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kusagrasskusa · 3 years
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Michael Myers X Reader - Part 3 - Final
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
This one made me cringe lol- Also, there's sorta a sensitive part of the story so beware.
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Today is the day, Y/N thought to herself. She pressed her hand against the wall of her hallway, slowly moving her hand across it as she walked towards the living room. It was in the middle of the night, around 3AM, where Michael would be asleep by now. Perfect time to finally see that face for more than 5 seconds... At that thought, Y/N furrowed her eyebrows as she wondered how Michael doesn't have terrible acne due to wearing that mask all the time.
Shaking that thought from her head, she finally entered the living room and saw a sleeping psychopath on her couch with his arms wrapped around a pillow and a large cover over him. The pillow he hugged always covered his face, hence why Y/N wasn't able to see his face in his sleep either. And because he always hides his mask when he sleeps as well, so Y/N can't just take it from him. And Michael's a light sleeper anyway, so he's catch her before she gets the chance to hide it.
But this time, Y/N had a plan. Michael sometimes goes out for a kill and she never knows. So when he comes home at 3AM and knocks on the door really loud, it scares the fuck outta her. In order to prevent that, she bought a camera that has night vision that connects to her computer. But she might as well test it out in living room, wink wink. And hey! She can find where he keeps his mask so Y/N doesn't have to look around for hours. All she needs to know is the general vicinity to find it. It was set up earlier, so all Y/N would have to do it wake him up so he goes to get his mask.
She smirked mischievously as she tiptoed over to the couch, hovering over him. He was lightly snoring peacefully, relaxed (not for long-). Y/N slowly gripped the sides of the pillow he was hugging, very delicately pulling it away from him. As soon as he started to stir in his sleep, she ripped it out of his arms and giggled as he shot his arms up over his face. "Aww, good morning, honey!" She giggled; Y/N could basically feel the anger radiating off of him, which was her que to ruN THE FUCK AWAY.
Right after saying good morning, she darted towards her room as fast as humanly possible. Rather than chasing her, Michael just hissed and stood up to grab his mask from in between the couch cushions. Sliding it on, he groggily went his way towards Y/N's room to probably scare her or something. I don't know, he was acting out in the moment.
Y/N could hear his slow footsteps faintly as he got closer to her door. She went under her bed to "hide from him" so it doesn't seem suspicious that she's just calm and all that. Yeah, poor reasoning but sTiLL. Anyway, Y/N giggled under her breath as he opened her bedroom door, walking inside her room and looking around. She could faintly hear him sigh as he went close to her bed, then turned his body so he could see under the bed. Y/N jolted backwards so she wouldn't get caught however Michael grabbed her arm strongly but gently. Y/N laughed as she was pulled out from under the bed.
"Michael, Michael, honey! I thought you were asleep or something!" She spoke innocently. She could just feel Michael's half lidded "shut the fuck up" stare. Y/N opened her mouth to speak again, but suddenly there was a loud knock on her door. I mean loud as in they were trying to break it. Y/N jumped, yelling, "what the hell!" Michael let go of her, watching as she raced towards her the kitchen to grab a knife. But as soon as she grabbed one, she heard someone yell.
"Police, open up!" Y/N's heart fucking dropped. Her lips quivered and her eyes widened with fear. Michael's image was the only thing she could think of as she opened the door, seeing a couple of large men in suits with guns and whatnot. One of them was holding a large black objects used to break down doors. Another was holding a piece of paper towards Y/N, speaking in a rough voice, "Y/N L/N! The FBI has a warrant to search your house for the wanted criminal Michael Myers. If we find any trace of him, you'll be under arrest for harboring a fugitive. For now, you'll be detained and questioned, not arrested. If it seems that your innocent, then you should remain calm and you shall have nothing to worry about. Otherwise, feel free to speak up now."
At the end of his speech, he put the paper away as a dozen of FBI agents bust into Y/N house, running across into ever room and searching for both Michael and evidence of him being here. At the sight of seeing all of this and the feeling of that officer grabbing her arms roughly and detaining them with cuffs, Y/N began to cry. Her legs became shaky and could barely support her weight. "What...What are you guys talking about?" She breathed out fearfully.
One of the FBI Agents came across an office room with a computer in it. The computer screen showed the living room as it is with agents breaking things and yelling. The agent hummed, messing with the keyboard and mouse a bit in order to see the earliest footage. It was of Y/N still setting up the camera and when she left the view of it, we can assume she went to bed. Hours later, a large and tall man was seen heading towards the couch, pulling off his mask and hiding it, then going to sleep.
"Muh-Michael is a...a..." Y/N breathed heavily, her back against the wall and an agent crouching on front of her. Of course, Y/N already knew this but at least she can get off with "not knowing."
"That's right. He's a murderer of many, including his older sister," the agent, who has Danyel written on his tag, replied. Two other agents went up to Dabyel, one of them addressing something.
"There's not a single thing of evidence of him, nor his clothing or anything. However I found camera footage of him being inside the house, sleeping on the couch in here. This woman clearly had a good relationship with him since she woke him up before we came here." Danyel responded to him, but Y/N didn't pay much attention. So Michael just left me, she thought. No, he had to leave so we both didn't get hurt! But it still hurts a little.
"Well, the good news is you didn't lie about not knowing him," Danyel laughed, grabbing Y/N's arm roughly and pulling her up. "Eh, sorry," he apologized when Y/N whenced at his grip. He started to walk her out of her extremely noisy home and to the outdoors, where she felt an amazing relief wash over. She sniffed, his breath quivering as some tears remained and more pouring out of her eyes.
"Michael was never bad to me," she spoke in a low voice, but still loud enough for Danyel to hear.
"Hmm." He walked Y/N up to his car, opening the back door to put Y/N in. She slid inside and was pushed away from the door and towards the middle of the seat. Then Danyel sat next to her, closing the door. Wait, she thought, this isn't normal. "Wanna tell me more about how he was?" He asked her, placing his hand on her cheek and using his thumb to wipe his tears. A shiver made it's way down her spine and her eyebrows furrowed together.
"He really is a nice guy. I can't comprehend he would do something so, so...evil," Y/N started, playing along. She really was hella upset about the reality of what murder really is; yes, she knew he was a killer but had never heard or seen any of it on the news or in person. And hey, if she didn't know the person, why would she care? But now in the situation where the hell that comes from murder is placed upon her so forcefully, she couldn't help but be slightly truthful when she spoke about how terrible she feels.
"My house was always open to people in need, and than I found him. He was knocking on doors, looking for a place to stay, and I let him in. He was so nice," Y/N sniffed, flinching her head back when Danyel tried to wipe away newer tears. "He was funny, loved the food I cooked and I finally had someone to talk to. No, he finally had someone to talk to. I could see so many signs of loneliness and hurt on him and I was finally curing it. Eventually, a few months in, I started to fall for him. Actually, I can't help but still love him.
"I know it's bad but he was the greatest friend, and roommate I could ever ask for. He never complained about anything either; heh heh, there was a time when he didn't have any clean clothes to change into so I had find something for him. All I had was a large baggy, blue hoodie and he it was a good look on him." Y/N chest ached as she finished her story, staring down at the car floor. Danyel hummed, a frown on his features.
Come to think of it, I never described Danyel very well. As mentioned before, he had a rough voice; it was serious and void of care. His demeanor matched it, too, as he showed no care for Y/N as she cried. Even when he wiped her tears, he didn't do it out of the goodness of his heart, but for some other reason. His uniform was a blue business suit, unlike the other FBI agents, and it matched a serious demeanor well. His stone cold blue eyes remained on Y/N as she talked, and every once in a while he was push back his slicked back grey-blonde hair.
He was around 35 with youth in his eyes yet his forehead and eyes had wrinkles. His hair was turning grey already, probably from the heavy amounts of stress that comes with the job. He was quite tall, about 6'3 (190cm) and had broad shoulders and had a slim yet muscular build. He wasn't necessarily attractive or youthful looking, but not yet ready for unattractive or old. He always had a frown and half lidded eyes showing nothing but boredom for everything around him.
"That's very touching, Miss L/N," he spoke. Y/N looked up at him, sniffing. Danyel hummed sadly and slowly changed his face to a softer expression. "Well, you won't have to worry about it after today. In the meantime, is there anyone you can stay with for now?" Y/N's lip quivered as she shook her head. "No? You have no family, no other friends? Surely a parent or sibling would help you on a time of need, regardless of your relationship." Y/N shook her head again. She doesn't really like to talk about it.
"I don't have anyone, sir, I really don't. I don't...I don't want to talk about it but I can't see my mom! I don't have any siblings or dad, but she's not a recommendation," she reassured, her heart speeding up at the mere thought of her mom. Danyel noticed this and raised a brow.
"In that case, you will stay at my place. Of course I'm putting my life on the line that way so expect some serious restrictions." Danyel spoke, a smirk almost appearing from the corners of his lips. Y/N felt a chill go up her spine and shook. "That means in case you attempt to escape, I'll be locking your room at night. Don't think I won't go further to ensure you don't attack me in my sleep. You won't be allowed to go outside at all ever. No one is allowed to visit. You'll be able to get food whenever you wish, as well. Roam to your heart's content, but please keep silent at night."
Y/N nodded in understanding but at the same time, she felt way more uneasy than she did when he suggested it. After all he never asked if she wanted to stay with him. No, he told her she would. And his rules seem way too restricting and very unprofessional for someone in the line of service. Y/N is nearly 65% of the size of him, so how the hell is she supposed to "murder him in his sleep?" He could literally just kick her if she ever tried. Lastly, it's almost like he really wanted this.
"Now that's settled, we should be heading towards the police station for questioning. If you're innocent and knew nothing of his history, you have nothing to fear so please be honest and put up no fight. May the lord have mercy on your beautiful soul."
~~~~~~
"This will be your room, Miss L/N," Danyel said as he opened a door. Inside was a small bed that was made, a dresser that was somewhat dusty besides it, and a single lap besides it. He walked up to the dresser and set down a suitcase that Y/N had packed after questioning at the police station. She had to get it searched twice in case something were to happen, which was hella annoying for her. "Please do make yourself at home. I'll cook something tonight."
Y/N nodded her head, very uneasy as the thought of staying at some strangers house. She sighed when he stepped out of her new room and she shut the door after him. She shivered, rubbing her eyes before tears well up. "I miss Michael," she whimpered silently to herself. She pushed her hair out of her face as a shaky breath came out of her mouth. Turning towards her suitcase, she walked towards it and unzipped it. She began to pull things out and pet them away in a respective place in the dresser.
"Hmm... Where's my hoodie?" Y/N mumbled to herself under her breath. She made sure to bring a certain blue hoodie with her, but she can't find it. As she scanned through it more, she noticed a few other articles of clothing was missing. "Um, alright, that's creepy," Y/N said out loud. What the hell did Danyel do? When she finished putting her clothes away, she pulled out comfortable pajamas of F/C and S/F/C. Right afterwards, she walked out of her room.
"I'm done," she called out as she walked into the kitchen. Danyel was wearing normal clothes now, no longer a suit and tie, and he was moving around something in a pan. It smelt a lot of breakfast in the kitchen, so it was probably eggs.
"Well, I hope you enjoy it here Y/N. You'll be staying for a while, heh heh," he chuckled as he turned off the stove. "I don't know if you like breakfast for dinner, but I made eggs and pancakes for us." Y/N smiled, sitting down at the table.
"It smells very nice, thanks," she answered. "I must have been in my room longer than I thought."
"You must have been. I had to go look inside to make sure you weren't sleeping, heh."
Y/N's smile dropped when she looked away from him. He was making plates at the moment, too distracted to see Y/N's look of discomfort. Maybe I'm just paranoid, she thought to herself, but he's so weird. As Danyel passed a plate in front of her and one for himself across the table, the room became filled with an awkward silence aside from the side of the a fork clinging against the plates. Y/N poked around at her food, a bit too unnerved from today to eat well. "You know, you shouldn't play with you food."
"I know, I know, sorry. It's just..." she drifted off before getting it back together. "I miss Michael. This is all so weird." Danyel frowned, picking up a few eggs and eating them before replying.
"I see. But you know, this is very essential for your well being. After all Michael is described as pure evil. If he truly cared for you, he would come here to save you and the task force will be here to protect you. If you wanted to go back to kill you because you know too much, the task force will be here to save you. I understand this sounds like I'm using you to lure him in however I am not. You're a very beautiful and intelligent girl who has a heart in the right place; as seen when you choose to let a homeless mute guy with a mask in your house.
"It would be quite a shame for someone like you to be void of life. After all, I'm sure you're a very fun woman and it would be nice for you to stick around with me for now. As you can see I'm without a family so it'd be nice to have some company." As Danyel finished talking, Y/N nodded in understanding. By now she had already finished her food as she kinda just wanted to go to sleep as fast as possible.
Y/N stood up and brought her plate to the think. "Thank you, sir, I appreciate it. I'm probably gonna go to sleep now, okay? Have a nice night," she said as she smiled at him. Danyel stared at her as she walked away and mumbled goodnight to her. Y/N walked into her new bedroom and looked around. It's depressing to not be in her own home, especially at a stranger's house. But she knew she'd see Michael soon, right? As she layer in bed and put on socks, she couldn't help but recall that one time Michael laid in bed with her because it was cold. She giggled to herself when she turned off the light and laid on her back in bed.
It was deadpan silent in that room. So if Y/N likes a fan or TV to help her sleep, this isn't very good for her. Either way, she managed to fall asleep while replaying plenty of memories in her head. Like one time, the first week of Michael staying at her house, she woke up to get ready for work. When she stood on the countertop to get the blender out of the cabinet so she can make a milkshake before work, she saw three sticky notes that said, "Short."
Giggling at the thought, Y/N closed her eyes, waiting for the day that she can live like that again. After all how can she can live in piece in her home again when her neighbors learn her roommate is a killer? She'd never be able to live in peace again. With these thoughts in mind, Y/N began to slowly drift away to sleep until finally all at once. At least, it would last like that for a little while.
A scream erupted from Y/N's mouth as she felt someone pin her to the bed. Danyel, of course, was the culprit; he held her arms tight and got really close to her. "Tell me where he's hiding! Tell me or you'll fucking regret it!" He yelled, making Y/N burst out into tears. She gasped for air, trying to kick him off of her but to no advil.
"I don't know! Let me go!" She yelled back, now trying to release her arms but of course to no advil.
"Lying little bitch," he mumbled under his breath as he let go of one of her wrists to grab something. It was too dark to see, but the metallic-plastic sound she heard means that's it could either be a knife or a gun. Y/N used her other arm to try to release her pinned down hand but she stopped when she felt something touch her head. It was, in fact, a gun. "Tell me where he is," he said as she flipped off his safety, "or die."
Y/N whimpered holding her free arm to her chest as to make herself seem smaller to comfort herself. Danyel released her other arm, putting both hands on his gun as he began to count down from 20. Y/N sniffed, her heart racing so heavily she felt like she would die. Only 20 seconds to live? What's the point of putting up a fight? She closed her eyes tightly, huffing until Danyel got to 5. As these few numbers left rang in her ears, she began to feel apprehensive.
In one swift and easy movement, she managed to hit the gun away from Danyel. A metallic clink sound hit the floor and right after that, a shot erupted. Danyel growled, slapping Y/N before lunging to grab his gun. As fast as humanly possible, Y/N shot up and ran out of the bedroom. The light from the moon shun from all the windows, making it easy for her to maneuver around and there was still enough darkness to hide. To the right outside her bedroom was the kitchen, and in the kitchen are knives, and like hell Y/N passing that up.
She swiftly grabbed one of those larger knives, one similar to what Michael carries. As soon as Y/N made it into the living room, she heard Danyel's loud footsteps run into the kitchen. In his house, the living room and kitchen don't have a wall to separate them to Y/N was in plain sight. "Put your hands up, L/N!" He yelled as he shakingly pointed his gun to her. "Make a move and I'll blow your head off!" Y/N gulped before having a master plan she learned in elementary school: she would juex him, or make him think she's going one way but she'd go the other way.
Y/N growled, jumping to her left but right as he shot, she jumped to the right again and began running. Danyel sped up after her, but it was a little too dark to actually see her move. He had to rely on her softly little footsteps that were being covered up but his own footsteps. Y/N took this time to swiftly get into Danyel's room. Luckily the floor in there was carpet rather than wood so she didn't worry about making too many sounds. In his room was a giant bed, two dressers, a nightstand, and a computer desk.
Danyel ran towards his room, not in it, and paused. "Where the hell did you go!" Y/N's lip quivered as she wiped off her tears; she looked around her for maybe something to throw so he would check inside the room, but know she was behind the door. Looking around her, she saw a binder on a bookcase she hadn't noticed before and grabbed it, throwing it against the wall across the room. Almost as soon as it hit the wall, Danyel ran in passed her, giving Y/N a good opportunity to ran out.
But instead, she gripped her knife strongly before running up to him from behind and plunging the knife right into his ribs, below his arm. Not many people know this, but one of the most vital places of the human body is below the arm; hell, sticking a fingernail in that place could pop so many vital veins that it will kill them. Danyel screamed loudly and spun around, his arm colliding with Y/N's head, knocking her over. Damn bobblehead. Danyel's blood sprayed as he pulled out the knife, dropping it onto the floor and covering his wound. He fell onto his knees. Somewhere in that time, he had dropped his gun, so he was defenseless.
Y/N ran towards the knife, as the gun was no where in sight due to the darkness of the room, gripping it. She rushed towards him a second time and this time, plunging the knife right into that bigass forehead of his. He went silent, went limp, and fell straightforward onto the floor. Y/N was covered in his blood but she weirdly didn't feel anything about it; she was basically desensitized from seeing Michael covered in it so many times.
With a small smile, she pulled out the knife and took it with her into her bedroom, throwing it onto the bed. She took of her bloody pajamas and then headed towards his bathroom to take a shower. Luckily there was much more blood on her clothes than on her body so she didn't struggle too much to get the thick liquid off her. Unfortunately, some of her skin was stained.
When she got out of the bathroom, she went back to the bedroom to get changed. No matter if she choose to put on a lovely dress, or skinny jeans and a sweater, or sweatpants and a tang top, she knew she wouldn't feel fully dressed until she could find that blue hoodie. So she headed towards Danyel's room and hummed to herself along the way. Stepping into the bedroom again, she froze when she saw a looming silhouette that was lit up by the moon threw the window. It wasn't open before, so she could only assume he had just gotten here.
A smile formed on Y/N's lips and her eyes felt watery from tears of joy. "Michael!" She yelled as she ran up to him, wrapping her arms around him tightly. She felt his arms slowly wrap around her too, lightly though as if she was fragile. Michael looked over at the fallen officer; he never knew that Y/N had it in her to kill someone. After all, Y/N once cried because Michael killed a butterfly. She must have been terrified; and although she couldn't feel it at the time, Y/N was so scared.
"Where were you?" Y/N asked as she whimpered, her lip quivering. Michael brushed her wet hair with his fingers, not answering her as expected. "Whatever... I'm so happy you're okay," she giggled to herself, wiping her tears away. "I guess their gonna link me with the murder no matter what I do, huh? So what should we do?"
Michael audibly sighed and let go of Y/N. He pulled his hands up to his mask, pulling it off. Y/N stood wide-eyed, her mouth parted open at the sight. Even in the darkness and little light the moon displayed, she could examine his ever feature for more than 5 seconds. "Oh my god," she mumbled as she brought her hands up to her mouth. "You're hot! What the hell! Why didn't you show this to me sooner you asshole!"
Her face was a light red shade and she was fangirling so badly inside her mind right now. After a solid 5 minutes, she finally calmed down; she crossed her arms and sighed to calm herself down. By now, Michael kinda just sat on his knees because he would rather not just stand there the whole time. "Well, um anyway..."
"Y/N. Obviously, we'll have to leave and hide. I've been doing this for a while; I know exactly where to go." Y/N shivered at the sound of his voice. It was serious this time instead of mischievous like the first time she heard it. Her cheeks lit up again but instead of fangirling on the outside, she kept it more on the inside.
"R-Right... I suppose we should be going now?" Michael nodded, smirking as he grabbed the sides of Y/N's face and pulling her close. They're lips collided (ew cooties) for a few seconds, and in those few seconds Y/N managed to have invented a new color, uncover a number hidden between 8 and 19376484974939, and small the word "iris." Right after they parted, Michael slid his mask back on and stood up.
"It'll be faster if I carried you. Your short legs won't go far on their own." Y/N huffed loudly, putting her hands on her hips. Her face was even brighter now, but wHatEver.
"You know what? Fine! At least I can see what it's like to be a damn giraffe." Plus she can also be held with biG StRonG ArMs or something like that, I don't know. She went up closer to him and held out her arms. "Just so you know, I want to stop by McDonald's on the way to where ever we're going."
Michael rolled his eyes, a smile on his lips under his mask as he picked her up bridal style, heading for the window. "Also! If you drop me, I'm suing." He ignored her comments as he stepped out of the window, landing perfectly. Y/N jumped in fear, "Cheezits rice!" Now if what she said didn't make sense to the reader, they should say it out loud and think about what it sounds like. Anyway, Danyel's house was actually pretty secretive. It's in the middle of the woods with only one road that leads to civilization. And that's where the two were heading.
~~~~~~~~~~
"This place is weird," Y/N said as she ate a McChicken nugget. She was holding a happy meal that contained a 6-piece chicken and fries. Also it came with a Rainbow Dash toy. Pure bliss. Anyway, the two of them were in an abandoned asylum that had concrete floors and white walls; there were cobwebs and wood and dirt scattered. "Also, if you think for a damn second that I'm cleaning this, you're wrong."
"Not you. We. We need a place to stay, right? A little work here and there would be sufficient."
"How are you gonna use big words when your handwriting looks like a mouse trying to use a pen?"
Three months later, the asylum did not look bad at all. They only used very few areas of it; by the window they entered through was three rooms that were very close together. These rooms and the hallway that connected it was basically their home. It sounds strange, but after managing to steal a bunch of lights, sweep away nasty shit, and steal certain kinds of wallpaper to cover up the old wallpaper, it became livable. They brought in tables, even a fucking fridge, chairs, etc to make it more homey.
The asylum wasn't that old either; there was outlets for plugging in lights and a fridge and all that. They were able to steal power from a nearby working place to even get the power needed, too. Things worked surprisingly well. Y/N would cook, Michael would clean, and all that good stuff. Y/N was the one to go out shopping and all that, and Michael would steal. The power of teamwork! One one of the rooms was a bed and dresser; the bed was pretty low on the ground actually and hella big too, so Michael could fit.
Y/N would be home a lot by herself, as Michael's quest to kill his family was worth more than life to him, but she would still see him pretty often.
This series is over, but if anyone suggests a story deeper into how their relationship would be or perhaps even kids, I have no shaming in making it happen. Or perhaps a different ending?!
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