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#I also need to get back on writing but like I said I have been going through it
sunsburns · 2 days
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good luck, babe!
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pairing: tashi duncan x fem!reader x patrick zweig x art donaldson
summary: patrick zwieg invites tashi duncan and art donaldson to join him at your engagement party. you think they came to celebrate you and your new chapter and put the past behind you, rebuilding lost friendships, but tashi hopes to stop you from marrying a man you never wanted.
—or: the trio crashes your engagement party
word count: 10k+ (i have a serious problem)
contains: SMUT 18+, smut with a lot of plot, post-challengers movie, fluff & comfort, angst, tashi’s pov but lowkey get's mixed up around the end, foursome, oral (fem receiving), oral (m receiving), p in v, unprotected sed (wrap it before yall tap it), homewrecking, cheating but also not cheating but also a worse third thing, three-way make out, four-way make out, dom!tashi, patrick being nasty, art being a loser, no use of y/n, situationship that lasts 13 years.
author’s note: this fic is based on this request with inspo from the greatest song on earth: good luck, babe! it was supposed to be a quick smut blurb but at this point, you all know i can’t write smut without some kind of angsty plot. everyone is super messy and there is some of the dirtiest smut i’ve written so far (it’s only going to get worse from here). this one is a roller coaster.
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It didn't make sense to any of them, how you could've possibly ended up with him. 
Tashi remembered him from Stanford vividly. He came from a white-collared family, with daddy's money that bought him everything he could've ever asked for, yet he still wanted more. He played golf and polo and even dabbled with tennis but never had enough guts or skill to take it seriously. But his dad funded most of the programs and events at the school, so everyone had known him, his charm, his family, and his inability to stick to one thing even outside of sports. He clung onto a new girl every other week, a new girl wrapped around his finger only to be ultimately tossed aside like the rest of them.
"What a dick," Tashi remembered you saying once, stabbing your fork into your salad while glaring daggers at him from across the cafeteria as he bragged loudly to his fan club about how he beat you in a game of tennis. 
Which he didn't. 
You let him win. 
His parents had been paying you to coach him, paid you extra every time you let him win a set or two against you, even if it was off the record. God knows you needed the money.
"I think I'm gonna quit." You said, turning back to glance at Tashi.
"About damn time," she snickered, shaking her head. "I told you you're wasting your time with him when you could be doing something better. Like training with me."
You had rolled your eyes and poked her arm with your fork, "If I'm still trailing after him this time next week, shoot me in the head and put me out of my misery."
Almost thirteen years later, you're walking around with his ring on your finger at your engagement party. A party where your fiancé announced your upcoming retirement after a tennis career run that Tashi would’ve killed for: a six-time US Open winner; two-time gold medalist at the Olympics; and brand deals that would ensure you and the next four generations of your family lived happily under your trust fund.
Clearly, you weren't marrying him for his money.
It made Tashi anxious, because, in some way, she could see that the marriage you will have with your fiancé is far too similar to how Tashi's would have been if she and Patrick stayed together. 
Okay, maybe that was a reach.
Or maybe it's how it would've been if neither of you had gone up to Art and Patrick's hotel room that night. Or maybe it would've been Tashi's ring on your finger instead.
She couldn't shake the bitter taste in her mouth as she watched you laugh with him, your eyes lighting up in the way they always did when you were truly happy. It used to be her who made you smile like that. She remembered the late-night practices, the shared victories, and the quiet moments shared in the comfort of her dorm room. She remembered the promises you both made and dreams of dominating the tennis world together.
But she shouldn't dwell on the past, she shouldn't think about what-ifs. At least that's what Art tells her with a hand on her shoulder. Tashi glances at his hand, noting the wedding band that rests on his finger. The squeeze he gives is meant to be reassuring, but instead, it feels suffocating.
"I'll never know how he bagged her," Patrick tuts from her other side, a drink already in his hand. He holds it close to his mouth, biting the rim of the glass before taking a swig, his eyes never leaving you. His gaze is shameless, tracing the way your dress hugs your curves, how your hair shines under the chandelier lights, and the way your lips move as you speak.
"Lucky, lucky man..." Patrick shakes his head, a bitter edge to his voice.
A waiter passes by, offering hors d'oeuvres, and Patrick takes enough for the three of them for himself, setting his empty glass on the platter. As he stuffs an appetizer in his mouth, he begins to walk away, his eyes fixed on you.
"Where do you think you're going?" Art asks, his hand slipping from Tashi's shoulder.
Patrick spins around, mouth full, and shrugs. "To congratulate the future bride."
Art and Tashi stand there, watching, almost dumbfounded when they see Patrick sneak up behind you, wrapping his arms around your middle and lifting you into the air. You shriek, champagne spilling from your glass, but once you see who it is, a wide smile breaks across your face.
"Patrick!" Tashi can hear you from across the hall. Patrick lifts you again, hoisting you into the air. You wrap your arms around his shoulders as he spins you around, your laughter ringing out—a sweet melody that draws the attention of everyone nearby. "You made it!"
Tashi feels a pang of surprise. 
You and Patrick had been in closer contact than she imagined. It stings, a reminder of the distance that had grown between you after her injury, much like the distance that had grown between Art and Patrick. She never knew you had turned to Patrick for comfort. Though it made sense—Patrick was the one you invited, not her, not Art. Patrick was the one who had to ask if he could bring two guests instead of the traditional plus-one. 
But surely, you must have known that if you invited Patrick, Tashi and Art would come too, right? 
Right? 
The question churns a pit of dread in her stomach as Art starts to lead her closer to you out of courtesy.
Patrick's arms are wrapped tightly around your torso, his hand resting too low to be innocent, but you seem happy nonetheless. Happier in Patrick's arms than in the arms of your future husband. You embrace him close, the ring on your finger glimmering under the chandelier lights as you hold onto the back of his neck, your laughter finally subsiding as the spinning stops.
As Tashi and Art approach, the reality of the situation hits her harder. She's watching from the outside, a spectator to your happiness, feeling the sting of what could have been. She forces a smile; your engagement to the worst person in the world can't possibly be the thing that makes her break. Not after everything she's built since she started coaching.
Art tries to catch your eye, offering a polite smile once you let go of Patrick. "Hey."
"Hi," you say breathlessly, a bright smile across your face while Patrick swings his arm over your shoulder. You seem happy, almost relieved that Tashi and Art were here as if you doubted their attendance. "Wow, it's been so long. You guys look great."
"Thanks," Tashi finally says, the words weighing on her tongue like lead.
"You look beautiful," Art tells you, and it's rushed as if he's been trying to keep it to himself but couldn't help it once he was close enough to you.
Before you can get a word out, another arm wraps around your waist, discreetly pushing Patrick away from you to slide into your side. Patrick lets out an annoyed groan, stepping aside as your fiancé squeezes you tightly and says, "She does, doesn't she? Hey, killer."
You turn to him, about to say something, maybe greet him back, maybe introduce him to everyone. But he doesn't let you, he's leaning closer until his lips lock with yours. It takes you by surprise—you flinch at first before finally letting him kiss you properly, his hand cupping the back of your neck, pushing you as close to him as humanly possible.
Art lets out a low, awkward sigh while watching it happen before him, and Patrick rolls his eyes, stepping back in search of a waiter for another drink.
He holds onto you like you're a prize he's won. Almost as if he's been competing with everyone in the world to finally hold you and show you off. As if that's all you had to offer.
You blink, clearly embarrassed, as you clear your throat to disperse the awkward tension in the air. "These are some, uh," you stumble over your words before nodding towards Art, Tashi, and Patrick, "some old friends from college. I'm sure you remember—"
He's interrupting you again, reaching out with the hand that's not on you to shake Tashi's hand. He holds it tightly, his thumb pressing against her wedding ring. "Tashi Duncan, how could I ever forget? Still beautiful as ever."
She has to force herself to smile, for your sake. "Good to see you too—"
"You know," your fiancé starts, cutting her off, "I still remember the time you told me to suck a bag of dicks 'cause I took up your court time. Best day of my life."
"Yeah," Patrick laughs. He's found another glass of champagne to sip on, and it's by his lips when he says, "who doesn't love getting cussed out by Tashi."
You wince. "Patrick—"
"No, no. He's right. It's one out of a million. I took it as a compliement," your fiancé says, glancing at Tashi again, his eyes darting up and down, lingering on her wedding ring once more before she finally pulls her hand out of his grasp. He spots the arm Tashi has been clinging to. "Art Donaldson, I'm a big fan."
Art stiffens as if taken by surprise. "Really?"
Your fiancé is nodding, and when Art glances your way for a split second, he tugs you closer. "You're incredible. Watching you play, it's like, woah! He's killin' it out there. Too bad you've retired though, would've loved to see you play longer."
There's a faint redness to Art's face when he nods. "Oh, thank you."
"I've always wondered if I'd turn out the way you did if I stuck to tennis." Then he laughs, nudging your side. "If only this one put me to work like Tashi did to you, maybe we would've competed in the US Open a few times."
You snort and shake your head, the idea of watching the two of them even standing on the court together amusing you. "You couldn't beat Art if you tried."
Your fiancé shrugs. "Maybe Patrick."
"Stop kidding yourself. You can't even beat your nephew and he's twelve."
He hums, turning so that he'll face you. He holds your waist with both hands, caressing you gently. "You sure know your way into a man's heart, baby," he says lowly before kissing you again. It's rough and messy, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth. You shriek and press your hands against his chest. He doesn't let go immediately, peeking a glance towards the trio while kissing you.
Tashi feels a knot of disgust tightening in her stomach. The audacity of him to touch you like that in front of them, as if he’s marking his territory, sets her blood boiling just a little bit. God, did no one teach this guy any kind of etiquette?
She catches Art's expression out of the corner of her eye—his jaw is clenched as he turns to look away. Patrick's lips curl in a sneer, the glass in his hand trembling slightly. He fights the urge to throw it.
Your fiancé reaches down and gropes your ass over your silky white dress before finally separating from you.
You stand there, looking flushed and embarrassed, letting him whisper something in your ear before he walks off, joining a group of men who whistle and catcall at him as he nears them. Each jeer and hoot feels like a slap to the face.
"Uh, sorry," you apologize, unable to meet their eyes as you blindly wipe at your chin to fix your lipstick. "That was... I don't know what's gotten into him. He's not usually like this. He's, uh... he's great."
Patrick scoffs, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Yeah, real great."
Tashi can’t help but frown, her heart aching as she watches you fumble. "You can't possibly want to marry him," she wants to say, but the words get stuck in her throat. She can't bear to hear the answer, especially if it's the one she fears.
Art steps forward, his face a careful mask of neutrality. "If you’re happy," he says, but there's an edge to his tone, a challenge. The unspoken words hang heavily in the air: "Are you?"
You nod quickly, too quickly, as if trying to convince yourself as much as them. "Sure, sure. I mean, what’s not to be happy about? His family loves me. I'm retiring this year, and gonna spend more time with my family. Hopefully more time with some old friends?"
"Old friends?" Tashi repeats, the words tasting bitter on her tongue. The casual way you say it, as if years of distance and silence can be bridged with a few meetings, stings more than she cares to admit.
"Yeah, before I get busy with the baby."
"Baby?" Patrick's voice is sharp, almost disbelieving. "You’re pregnant?"
"What? No!" You quickly sputter, shaking your head. Then you pause, a thought crossing your mind and you lighten up a little bit, a hopeful smile gracing your face, "But I do want kids one day. I want three."
"Does he want kids?"
"We've talked about it, but he shuts it down all the time."
"You poor thing." Patrick puffs out, pinching your arm before reaching for your hand and leading you toward the bar. "Let's bring this conversation outside, ladies. I need a smoke. And you all need a drink stronger than his champagne."
The idea of fresh air and a strong drink is appealing. After grabbing a bottle of finely aged wine, the four of you make your way to the garden outside the grand hall. The shift from the stuffy indoor atmosphere to the cool night air is a relief. 
The moonlight casts a silvery glow over the meticulously maintained garden, illuminating the path with a soft, ethereal light. You glow in your pretty white dress, the fabric shimmering as you take a seat on a patch of grass near the rose bushes. The scent of roses mingles with the crisp night air, creating a tranquil yet poignant backdrop. You glance up at the three of them who stand there, watching you.
Tashi raises a brow as you take a long swig of the wine. She didn't remember you to be much of a drinker. 
"It's not that big of a deal," you say, passing her the bottle when she finally sits next to you. 
It's as if her movement had woken the two guys and then Art takes a seat on your other side while Patrick lies down on the grass a few feet away to light a cigarette. 
You pout, "If he doesn't want kids, then we won't have kids."
"But you want kids," Tashi reminds you, but it's more of a question as if she's wondering if that's truly what you want. Don't get her wrong, Tashi loves being a mother, she would kill anyone for Lily, but you wanting kids barely before confirming your retirement threw her off a little bit.
"Of course I do." You hiccup, reaching for the bottle again. "I'm not getting any younger. It's just... he'll come around."
"And if he doesn't?" Art asks, his voice gentle but probing.
"Can we not talk about that right now? I just want to get shitfaced and party."
"Now we're talkin'!" Patrick interjects, his grin wide as he takes a drag from his cigarette. The embers glow briefly in the dark.
"Come on, everybody gather." Patrick flicks his cigarette off to the rocky pathway and snags the bottle from Art's hands. He raises it, nodding at you with that same smirk he's had for years. Snarky, cocky, and yet endearing. "To celebrate new beginnings. Even if your future husband's a dick and can't make you cum nearly half as hard as I can. Good luck, babe."
The rest of you all make a noise of annoyance, rolling your eyes. "Seriously?"
"Shut the fuck up, Patrick," Art scoffs, though there's a faint smile tugging at his lips as you let a giggle slip out past your fake annoyance.
Patrick's smile only widens at the sound of his friends' protests. It reminds him of the good old years when his biggest worry was which shorts he'd wear to his next game. "Cheers!"
As the bottle is passed around, Tashi can't help but feel a pang of nostalgia mixed with bitterness. The comradery of the past clashes painfully with the reality of the present. Is this how things are going to be like now? Is this night a call for a truce, waving the white flag so that all of you could be friends again, now as adults, making plans for brunch and getting the kids together for birthday parties?
You take another sip from the bottle, your gaze drifting towards the moonlit sky. "To new beginnings," you repeat softly, though the hope in your voice is tinged with uncertainty.
Tashi leans back, her eyes lingering on you, a mix of longing and regret pooling in her heart. Art sits quietly beside her, lost in his thoughts, while Patrick’s laughter rings out, masking deeper sentiments beneath his forced cheerfulness. The chatter and music from the hall spill into the garden, the warm lights casting a golden glow over the scene. Patrick talks animatedly about the seasons he thinks he has left in him, and to Tashi's annoyance, you encourage him.
She shakes her head at the way Patrick's eyes light up, glancing at her with a knowing look. Despite her irritation, she can't deny the comfort of slipping back into their old dynamic.
Suddenly, Art hums thoughtfully. He has been mostly quiet, listening to the conversation with occasional quiet laughs. Now, as he puts down the empty bottle of wine, he looks at you, his eyes more alive than they have been in a long time. "I had a burger for the first time in years," he announces, a smile spreading across his face as if he is proud of it.
You gasp, perking up as you reach over to hold his hands. "How was it?"
"Amazing," Art says fondly, "like heaven inside a bun."
"You should've seen him," Tashi smirks, shoulder to shoulder with Patrick, playfully kicking Art. "He was drooling just looking at the menu."
He rolls his eyes, "I wasn't drooling." When you fall silent, he looks at you again, frowning. "You haven't had one in a while, have you?"
You shake your head, "No, I think the last time I had one was when we graduated."
Patrick scoffs, "Bullshit."
You laugh, "It's true! I've been very strict with my diet. And now that I've retired... I don't know..." You shrug, suddenly getting shy as Art starts tracing stars against the back of your hand. "There are so many options, I wouldn't know where to start."
"It doesn't have to be anything fancy," Tashi says.
"Pretty sure I saw an old diner on the way here," Patrick suggests. He stands, stretching and groaning before bending over to take Tashi's hand and help her up.
You sputter, watching them all start to stand before you. "Shut up, we're not driving, you're drunk."
"But sober enough to see how badly you want this," Patrick teases, waving a finger near your face and smirking. "You're drooling."
"No, I'm not!"
"Sure you are," Art joins in, pulling you up to your feet. He swipes a thumb at your chin, "Look right there, by your lip."
"Oh," Tashi grins, "I see it."
"Shut up, Tash, no you don't." The words fall from your lips before you can stop them. The old nickname fits too smoothly as if it hasn't been years since you've called her that. Tashi smiles, feeling like a teenager again, messing around with you. She starts to walk off, Art and Patrick following her while you stand there, dumbfounded and a little breathless from their teasing.
"Where are you going?"
"To get a burger?" Tashi shrugs, and she smirks at you, a mischievous smile that makes you wonder if any of you have ever grown up at all. "You coming or what?"
You try to be reasonable, "I can't just leave."
"We'll bring you back before anyone notices," Patrick bargains, jogging back to your side and taking your arm to lead you to the exit. "Lighten up, when was the last time you had some fun?"
You don't even look back.
You find yourself laughing, nodding as the four of you make your way out of the garden. The moonlight guides your steps, casting long shadows on the path.
The walk is a blur of laughter and shared stories, the kind of carefree joy that you haven't felt in years. Before long, you arrive at the diner. The neon lights buzz softly, casting a nostalgic glow over the parking lot. You can smell the greasy, comforting aroma of burgers and fries even before you step inside.
The few people in the diner stare, watching as what seems to be a runaway bride and three wedding guests stumble and giggle over each other, lips a little purple from the wine you've all had and ordering burgers to go.
Once you have your food, you all find yourselves sitting on the curb of the diner's parking lot, the warm night air wrapping around you like a comforting blanket. Patrick hands out the burgers, his eyes twinkling with a mischievous light as he makes a show of presenting yours to you. "First bite in... how many years?"
"Too many," You take the burger with a chuckle, unwrapping it and taking a bite. "Oh my God," you mumble around your mouthful, "this is amazing."
Tashi watches you, a soft smile playing on her lips. "Told you."
Art takes a bite of his own burger, nodding in agreement. "There's nothing like it."
You shake your head, going in for more, "This is the greatest thing I've put in my mouth."
Patrick, already halfway through his, lets out a loud laugh, "Yeah, I bet."
The parking lot felt like a little bubble of the past, untouched by the years that had separated you. It was strange how easy it was to fall back into the rhythm of your old friendships, how natural it felt to banter and laugh as if no time had passed at all.
Tashi rolls her eyes, though you don't even seem phased by Patrick's joke. "I can't even get mad," you say, swallowing, "I feel like I'm eighteen again."
"Tell me about it," Art agrees. Then he pauses for a beat, chewing on her burger a little slower before turning to you. "You know, this reminds me of that time... when, you know."
"Oh," You snort and nod, scrunching up your face at the memory. "Yeah. It kinda does."
"What?" Patrick looks between the two of you, raising his brow in interest. "What time?"
"It was a long time ago," you tell him.
"Like back in Stanford," Art explains, and then he points between Tashi and Patrick with his burger, "when you two were still a thing."
Tashi sits up straight now, her full attention on you and Art. "Oh, really?"
"It was that time Patrick came for a surprise visit in the middle of our girls' night," you say, nodding your head at her, hoping she'd catch up with the memory. "And you kicked me out of your dorm so you and Patrick could... you know."
Tashi nods. "Have some alone time." She finishes for you.
She remembers that night well: you were both nestled in the haven of her dorm room, the soft glow of the television casting gentle shadows on the walls as the movie played on. You were curled up under her covers, your bodies intertwined, legs tangled together in a comforting knot. The world outside ceased to exist in those moments, leaving just the two of you in your little cocoon of comfort.
Tashi can still feel the sensation of your fingers running through her hair, the tender, rhythmic motion soothing her in a way nothing else could. The warmth of your touch lingered on her scalp, your fingers traced lazy patterns, and she remembered the way her body instinctively relaxed into yours.
But then came the knock on the door, and she felt her heart jump at her throat as she swung her legs out from under the covers and padded softly to the door.
When she opened the door, there stood Patrick, his presence almost surreal. He was holding a bouquet of carefully picked-out flowers, their vibrant colours contrasting sharply with the dim light of the hallway. His smirk was both nervous and charming
"You kicked her out?" Patrick gasps, and Tashi gives him a blank stare. He's acting as if he wasn't even there, as if he didn't stand by her desk while watching her scramble to clean up the mess the two of you made in her dorm and shove you out the door before locking it.
Patrick shrugs, that stupid smirk painted on his lips again before he finishes his burger. "Would've let you stay if it were up to me," he tells you, "The more, the merrier."
"No way," you poke your tongue at the inside of your cheek. "She wanted you all for herself."
"Please, I would've been too distracted with you to even give him my time of day," Tashi admits. "I did you a favor, Patrick. Saved you from blue balls."
He holds a hand to his heart. "I'm so honored."
"But anyway," you start, "while I was walking back to my dorm I bumped into Art, who got stood up on a date."
Patrick blinks, turning to Art. "You got stood up?"
"Was it that girl from marketing?" Tashi asks.
Art's cheeks start to turn red, the flush growing from his neck and up to his ears at the attention. "Yeah, she, uh, she bailed on me last minute."
"I remember you telling me the date went well," Patrick says. "That you guys went out late, bought takeout... you made out in your car," Then, to fuck with him, he adds, "You came in your pants 'cause she kissed your neck. Remember?"
"And that did happen," Art confesses begrudgingly, glaring at Patrick while Tashi laughs. "It’s just... it wasn't with her..."
"It... it was me," you admit.
Tashi wishes she could say she's surprised, but it's nearly impossible because anyone who knew you back in college knew very well about the big crush you harboured for a certain blonde. She knew the way you swooned after him, even if you never tried to admit it because it was too embarrassing.
"Wait, so," Tashi starts, poking at your side and drawing a nervous giggle from you. It makes her smile. "Is Art that guy you told me about, with the puppy eyes and pretty smile?"
"Okay," you puff out, blushing, "I did not say puppy eyes."
"You think I have puppy eyes?" Art asks you, his gaze softening.
When you take a few seconds too long to answer, Patrick claps his hands together and swings his arm over yours and Art's shoulders, pulling the two of you closer to him. "Aw," he teasingly coos at the two of you getting all flustered, "you think he has puppy eyes."
"It was so long ago," you say, running your hands over the soft fabric of your dress. "I don't even remember."
"I'm so sure you don't," Patrick hums, a knowing look in his eyes before he presses a sloppy kiss against your cheek.
You groan, shoving your hand in his face to push him off before you stumble to stand on your feet again, wiping your cheek from his spit. "You're disgusting," you huff, but there's no real bite in your words because there's a faint smile threatening to appear at the corners of your lips. 
You stand there for a beat or two, brushing off your dress and feeling the weight of the night settling in. You stare down at the three of them sitting on the curb, the neon lights of the diner buzzing behind you. You can see the hall where your engagement party is from where you stand; you almost don't want to go back.
"Okay," you tuck your lower lip between your teeth as you hesitate, "this... this has been fun."
"Don't leave yet," Tashi says while Art's smile drops, his face falling in disappointment.
"Yeah," Patrick rushes to stand, reaching for you, "the party was just getting started."
"I really have to get back," you step away. "If anyone finds out I left, I'll hear about it for days. This has been great. Like, seriously, I don't think I've ever laughed this hard since before..." You trail off, your tongue getting tied as you glance at Tashi, then at her knee, covered by the length of her dark purple dress. You clear your throat. "Well, uh, I better go. But thank you again, for the beer and the burgers and the memories. I hope you guys can make it to the wedding."
You start to walk away before they can say anything. Like, on purpose, as if you know that if they tried to make you stay and ditch your party, you would. You would cave to their defences.
The sound of your heels is deafening. Tashi watches you go, she watches how you wrap your arms around yourself, and it all feels too similar to how she watched you go all those years ago and never chased after you. 
"Don’t marry him," Tashi stands from the curb. She's shaky on her feet, taking long strides to walk past Patrick and hoping to catch up to you. She sees you freeze in your steps, barely out of the parking lot. You turn to look at her quickly, face falling in shock at her demand.
"What?" Your voice is quiet, hoping that your ears are betraying you.
Tashi slows down once she is close enough, the distance between you is almost nothing but the gap feels like miles. The red and blue lights from the neon sign blend into a deep purple against your skin, casting an ethereal glow that makes this moment feel suspended in time. She watches your face, sees the way your brows knit together, the flicker of anger and confusion in your eyes.
Her heart is pounding, the blood rushing in her ears almost drowning out her voice. But she forces herself to speak, her voice low and urgent. "Don’t marry him," she says again, each word feeling like it's being ripped from her chest. Her resolve, which had held firm all these years, finally crumbles.
Getting Patrick back into her life had been one of the most complicated, tangled pains she had ever undertaken. The late-night calls, the awkward meetings, the painstakingly slow rebuilding of trust between herself and Art. 
None of it had been easy.
Yet, even with Patrick back, there had always been something missing—a void that only you could fill.
She looks into your eyes, her gaze unwavering, despite the tears welling up. "Please," she pleads, her voice breaking. "Please, don't marry him." The words hang heavy in the air, a desperate plea that carries years of longing and regret. She knows that having you back won't make up for the lost time, and won't magically fix all the mistakes and missed opportunities. But she can at least try, can at least fight for the chance to make things right.
"Tashi, you can't possibly be asking me to—"
"It’s not worth it," she tells you anyway, her voice trembling with the weight of unspoken truths. She knows it’s a risk, a gamble she's taking by laying her heart bare, but she can’t hold back any longer. The years of resentment, of silent longing, bubble to the surface, fueled by the sight of you with someone else's ring on your finger. It's a bitter pill to swallow, the realization that she resented you not for leaving, but for never coming back. 
Why didn't you come back?
Tashi's words hang heavy in the air, a desperate plea born from years of unspoken desires and regrets. "Both of you want different things anyway. You don't love him," she continues, her voice raw with emotion, "it's not gonna last. One day you're gonna wake up in the middle of the night and realize I'm right. You'd hate to admit it, but I will be right. I am right. He doesn't deserve you. He's no good for you."
You scoff, "And you are?"
"You said it yourself," she presses on, her voice barely above a whisper, "You've never laughed the way you do with us. And you kept in touch with Patrick, so that's gotta mean something." It's a feeble attempt to grasp at straws. "Marrying him will just be another excuse, another stupid reason. I thought you were better than that."
Then she remembers that night before you left for London, back in 2012. It's like a distant memory now, a flicker of what could have been. The air was thick with anticipation, the tension palpable as you stood on the precipice of something new. She remembers the way your eyes met hers after your exchange with Art at the hotel bar, a brief greeting with an old friend, both of you at the peaks of your careers. It is a silent exchange of longing and regret. For a moment, it felt like time stood still, like the world was holding its breath, waiting to see what would happen next.
She remembers the smell of your perfume, the bitterness of the drink you were having and how she could taste it when she kissed you; tongue running over your teeth, nails clawing at skin, hair tangled between fingers, hot breaths and unkept promises and false apologies and a night of regret.
And then the morning came, and with it, you had to leave. And she never stopped you.
"Tashi… I can't just throw this all away for you. For any of you. You were the one who told me to leave."
"I know."
"Because you know everything, right? Because you know he's not good for me, you know it all."
"I know you."
"No, you don’t," you say, your voice tinged with hurt. "Not anymore.”
Tashi huffs, shaking her head before she reaches out, cupping your cheeks gently in her hands. Her lips hover over yours for a moment, a silent plea hanging in the air between you. She waits, her heart pounding in her chest, for you to make a move—to kiss her, to push her away, anything.
You gaze into her eyes, tears glistening in the dim light, before finally closing the distance between you. The kiss is tender, and bittersweet, a culmination of years of unspoken longing and regret. It's a brief moment of solace amid chaos.
Your hands dig into the nape of her neck, where the short ends of her dyed hair tickle the skin of your wrist. The heat of your engagement ring nearly burns her, the edge of the diamond scraping against her skin.
When you pull away, breathless, Tashi fears this will be the last time she will see you. 
"Tashi, this doesn’t change anything," you say, your voice trembling.
"It changes everything," she whispers, her fingers tracing the line of your jaw. "You know it does."
But you step back, breaking the contact, the distance between you growing with each passing moment. "I have to go," you murmur, the weight of the decision heavy on your shoulders. "I need to think."
As you walk away, Tashi watches you go, her heart heavy with uncertainty. She clings to the memory of that fleeting moment, a glimmer of hope in the darkness. 
Back in the hotel room, an uneasy silence settles among the trio. Tashi steps out of the shower, her mind a whirlpool of conflicting emotions. The press of your lips still lingers on her own, a persistent buzz that crawls under her skin. 
As she rubs lotion into her arms, she takes her time, methodically moving over each inch of her skin as if she could somehow rub away the confusion and yearning. She finishes her skincare routine, staring at herself in the mirror, almost meeting the eyes of the eighteen-year-old girl who had her whole life ahead of her. It's a constant chant in her head not to dwell in the past. 
She has to focus—she needs to find a way to pull Patrick Zweig out of the top 200 ranks and get him qualified for the US Open by the time the next season starts.
Speaking of the devil, when Tashi steps out of the bathroom, she finds Patrick lounging on the loveseat by the open window. Naturally, his shirt has found itself a home on the floor, and a cigarette dangles from his lips.
He perks up when she walks out, sitting up to greet her, "Don't beat yourself up."
Tashi rolls her eyes and climbs into the bed, letting herself sink into the soft comforter. "Shut the fuck up, Patrick. And put that shit out."
"I'm just saying," he shrugs, taking one last drag before flicking the cigarette out the window, grinning when he hears Tashi scoff. "She's a stubborn little shit," he says as the hotel door clicks open and Art walks in. Patrick hums, "Probably only marrying him to piss us off anyway. Been trying to talk her out of it for months. Never listens."
"She might listen to Tashi," Art says, turning to his wife with a hint of optimism in his voice. "Lily's asleep, by the way."
"Right, because my word is stronger than both of yours," Tashi retorts, pulling the blanket over her legs.
Art and Patrick glance at each other before nodding, "Yes."
"Well, yeah."
They all sit in silence for a while, each lost in their own little bubble. The hotel room is quiet except for the faint hum of the air conditioner and the occasional rustle of the bedspread. 
Art joins Tashi on the bed, absently flipping through the channels on the television, the remote clicking softly in his hand. Beside him, Tashi pretends to read a book, her eyes scanning the same sentence over and over again without really absorbing the words. Meanwhile, Patrick rummages through the mini fridge, the sound of bottles clinking and wrappers crinkling breaking the stillness.
A quiet knock on the door makes the three of them freeze, their heads snapping up in unison. They exchange hesitant glances, each wondering if they imagined it. Then three raps against the wood sound again, more insistent this time. Patrick scrambles to the door, Art and Tashi close behind him, their curiosity piqued and their hearts pounding.
Patrick swings the door open, and there you are, a sight for sore eyes. You're still in the same dress, though one of the straps has fallen off your shoulder, and your makeup is smudged around your eyes. You hold your phone close, dropping it from your ear.
"I tried calling," you say, turning your phone so they can see Patrick's contact, a simple 'pat' with a cute tennis ball emoji next to his nickname. "You never answered."
"My phone died." He shrugs.
You let your hand fall to your front, where your fingers pull on each other nervously. Tashi can't help but notice the lack of a ring on your finger all of a sudden. She raises her brows at you, a knowing look flashing across her face before she tells you, "Something's changed."
You roll your eyes and step into the room, sliding between Art and Patrick easily. "A lot has changed." You walk until you reach the middle of the room. 
It's a big hotel room, not nearly as big as the ones Art and Tashi are used to staying in, but big and luxurious nonetheless. You fit in perfectly with your white gown and styled hair, a vision of elegance even in your dishevelled state.
You turn, facing the three of them again. "I hope whatever offer you guys were hinting at earlier still stands... I don't exactly have anywhere else to stay, unless I want to hear my mother telling me how she was right the entire night."
Tashi smirks. "You know I'm about to tell you the same thing too, right?" She closes the space between the two of you, tucking a fallen strand of hair behind your ear. Her nails brush against your jaw in a feather-light touch until her fingers pause below your lips.
"Yeah, I know."
You don't seem too upset about it. Instead, you're grinning, letting Tashi push her thumb between your lips. The gesture is intimate, charged with unspoken emotion. You're standing face-to-face when she says, "I told you so."
She leads you to sit on the bed, and you let her, nearly tripping over your heels before you land on the soft duvets. Tashi leans down, her nose brushing against yours, and you swallow your heart racing.
"You were right," you murmur. It's hard to maintain eye contact when your skin is buzzing with heat and when there's so much going on in the depths of her eyes that it dizzies you. "I hate it, though."
Her nose is cold against yours, a sharp contrast to the warmth of her breath. You let your eyes fall shut as she slowly traces patterns under your chin, pressing her thumb harder into your mouth before pulling it out. She catches the side of your face with it, making a mess with your spit.
She smiles, "I know you do."
Instinctively, and embarrassingly, there's a shiver rolling down your spine.
Tashi releases a small chuckle, and then, after a final moment, her lips fill in the small gap between you both. You sink into it immediately, heart rejoicing as her lips, warm and smooth, explore your own.
It's a little fumbly, nervous and making you tremble under her hands. Tashi loves every second of it. Her fingers grip your face tighter, mouth pressing to yours with more hunger as you wind your fingers into her hair and sigh. Between gasped breaths and soft sounds of enjoyment, she slips her tongue along your lower lip, and so you open your mouth a little wider.
Tashi ends up straddling you, making out like you're both teenagers again, putting on a show for Art and Patrick. The exhilarating butterflies twirling in your stomach match the memories, too. 
You moan softly as she pulls away from your mouth, her attention shifting to your neck. As you watch Patrick and Art make their way to sit next to you on the bed, the bed dipping, you tilt your head to the side and open up your throat to Tashi. You whimper as you feel her lips drag over your exposed skin. She nibbles and sucks until she finds the sensitive part that makes you cry out.
"Fuck," you whimper. You tug on her air-dried curls, coaxing her back up to your lips so you can enjoy the feeling of her mouth on yours. Tashi sighs, and you can feel her smiling into it while beckoning Art and Patrick to join in.
Their lips are on you in a split second, with Art pressing soft, ticklish kisses against your collarbone, and Patrick sliding his tongue from your shoulder to the back of your ear. He's moaning at the taste of you, sucking a bruise under your jaw while digging his hand into the back of your hair. 
He slowly starts to bring his sloppy kisses to your mouth, lips brushing against Tashi's and your own before she draws back. You whine, pouting as you watch her take a few steps away before making herself comfortable in the cushioned seats by a small dining table. You can't pout for too long, because now Patrick is kissing you, tugging softly at your hair until your back arches.
His tongue presses against yours, pressing as far back as he can reach, swallowing your every moan and whimper. You bring your hand up to scratch at his beard, then run your nails over his scalp. This is when Art starts to get a little bolder by running his hands up and down your thighs, pulling and pulling the long skirt of your dress until he reaches the end of it and he can touch your skin and take off your heels, tossing them aside somewhere.
Patrick traps your lower lip between his teeth, watching it bounce back into its place as he leans back just the slightest bit. You break apart with a whimper. Your half-lidded eyes meet his, then flick down to the trail of spit strung between your glistening lips. He stares at you, cheeks a little red as he smirks, "I've missed this. Missed you."
You smile, breathless as Art's hand makes its way up higher and higher and closer to your heat, his mouth is relentless with its attack at your neck. He grinds his crotch against the side of your leg and you cradle the back of his head with your other hand.
"You saw me last week, Patrick."
"Last week?" Art pulls away. His lips are parted, eyes a little dazed but focused enough to stare between you and Patrick in confusion. Tashi smirks from where she sits and shifts in her place.
"We're not all perfect, Art." You groan, rolling your eyes as Patrick laughs, reaching over you to start pulling down Art's pants who shifts in his place to let him. Once they're off, he looks at you, and it's embarrassing how fast you tangle together, melding together into a pathetic heap on the bed for Tashi and Patrick to see. 
Your lips move in tandem, his soft, pouty lips slitting against yours with ease as you lead his hands to your chest and shove them under your dress.
Art squeezes and fondles your breasts over your bra, his hips jerking against your leg again, almost desperate as his boner presses against the fabric of your dress as it has fallen down again.
Tashi startles you as she settles behind, one knee on the bed while her other long leg steadies her on the carpeted floor below. You let her tilt you backward, parting you from Art and she draws you into an upside-down kiss. The salacious kiss leaves your legs parting for the two men beside you. 
Patrick makes quick work of taking that damn dress off of you and you sputter out a pathetic moan when Art's soft hands tease your hardening nipples once Patrick gets half of it off.
Your dress eventually falls into a heap on the floor in front of the bed, you’d matched with it a white paired set underneath. 
"No fucking way," You peek one eye open slightly to see Patrick scowling while Art runs his hands everywhere he can reach, across your stomach, your thighs, under your boobs, down your back. 
Patrick tilts his head and groans, "I can't believe you wore this shit for him."
Your hand cups Tashi's jaw to deepen the kiss as you both ignore Patrick, only Art snorting out a laugh as he tugs his shirt over his head. 
Patrick slots himself between your open legs, stopping just a breath short of your aching cunt to nip teasingly at your soft inner thigh before dragging his mouth up to your neck again. He revels in the moans he's able to draw from you as he finally comes to caress your face. 
You pull away from Tashi and gasp in a breath. "Kiss me, Pat," You bite your lip, feeling your heart race as he eyes you up so openly. 
"Beg me," He counters with a quirked brow, challenging you. 
Your nose crinkles, "I'm not doing that."
"I'm not kissing you, then."
"Shut up and kiss her, Patrick," Tashi groans, attached to Art. She holds his face the same way she did with you, pulling him closer and letting the man crawl to her. But she's glaring at Patrick with venom behind it you know she can’t mean when she's trembling under Art's gentle touch as he slips off her silky nightgown.
"Come here," You beckon Patrick closer with a fiendish look in your half-lidded eyes.
"Yes, ma'am." Patrick nods, dazed as he obliges. "Anything you want, beautiful," His voice slightly slurs as the space between you diminishes once again. "I'll do anything for you," His husky voice drapes around your name like velvet as it's whispered against your plush lips.
Your hands easily find themselves tangled in Patrick's curly hair and tug him to your lips with aching want. You dive in immediately, lips meshing against and, eventually, catching against his chapped lips. 
A moan escapes from your throat and he uses it as an opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth. From there, it's another flurry of saliva, tongue and entirely too much white-hot pressure building below. 
When you break for a breath, a string of saliva stretches between each of your red, puffy lips. Patrick groans at the sight and pulls you in for a slower, raw kiss that leaves you slick and trembling for more. When you pull apart again, Patrick plants a sweet kiss on Art's mouth before focusing back solely on you, his hand slowly approaching your white thong.
When he starts to rub, you moan into his mouth and start trailing your hand to his crotch, palming his dick. Patrick reciprocates easily and tugs at your lower lip with an impish look in his eyes. 
Lips attack your neck again, pulling you higher up on the bed. You hear pants and clothes being shed from every angle around you before you're surrounded again, hands everywhere.
While Art pulls Patrick into a kiss, Tashi cups your face again and draws you into a gentle one as you settle between her legs, your back to her chest. You rest your head on Tashi's shoulder as you heave out another breath, her hands travelling from your navel to tracing shapes on your clit, over your wet panties, spreading your legs apart with her own. 
"Please, Tash," you whimper as her fingers curl around the edge of the fabric and tug so it strains against your leaking cunt perfectly. She then decides to skim a whisper of her touch against your pulsing ache. 
You gape as Patrick wraps his hand around Art's dick, stoking it, and he lets out the prettiest little whine. Patrick slowly works his way down Art's body, running his tongue between each curve of his muscles, collecting the sweat that's been building on his skin before wrapping his mouth around him, taking all of it in one insatiable bob of his head.
Tashi's nails tickle lightly up your stomach, then in the valley between your breasts and then back down again. It has you spiralling, arching your back as she presses a kiss at your neck.
"You're being so good," she coos into your ear. Your name is only a breath out of her mouth, and she's edging your clit with a gentle roughness that could only come from a woman of her calibre. Tashi pulls your panties aside and flicks and flits about your dripping cunt like she already knows how to make you come undone.
It makes you tremble. You'd sworn up and down earlier about how Tashi didn't know you anymore, and here she is, proving to you that she still does, that she knows every curve and divot of your body, that she still knows what makes you whimper and twitch.
Your hand quickly reaches behind you, between the heat of your back and her body and finds her clit and you try to emulate how she's making you weak. Each quiet gasp you earn from her has you moaning back tenfold under her saccharine trance and she quickly starts pumping two fingers into you.
One particular flick of Tashi's thumb on your clit coupled with her lips gliding against and sucking your own in a wanton kiss sends you over the edge. You moan and cum, back arching as you relentlessly force Tashi's hand against your cunt, searching for more delicious friction. 
She takes you all, and lets you ride it all out on her fingers while swallowing every moan you let out in a lewd, wet kiss. Art and Patrick moan appreciatively at the two of you, then focus back on each other.
Before you're able to come down from your high, Art's shoving his come down Patrick's greedy throat. He swallows it all, pulling off Art's red-tipped cock with a vulgar pop that creates a trail of saliva in its wake. 
Patrick smiles down at you and leans closer, and you think he's about to kiss you but then he swerves and kisses Tashi instead, who removes her hand from your cunt and slowly works it up his thigh until she cups his balls and gives them a gentle squeeze. He moans into her mouth, winking at you amid his impromptu make-out session you were tempted to join.
You shimmy back and turn on your stomach, positioning yourself between Tashi's long tanned legs. "Can I eat you out?" You ask while kissing up her leg, and you want to hear how much she needs you. You bite at your bottom lip as you nuzzle into her juicy cunt. "Tashi?" You look up at her from where your face is pressed against her. Her sweet smell makes you sigh as you tease your tongue with her hip bone. "Please, Tash, let me taste you." 
"Yeah, go for it," Comes her breathless plea.
You finally pull her lips apart, revelling in how she squirms against your hold on her hips. 
You're on your knees, trapped arching between Tashi's long legs when you hear Art clear his throat. You give one long lick up Tashi's twitching cunt before turning around with her slick dribbling down onto your chin to where Art has sidled up behind you.
Art crawls closer to you, "Can I touch you, beautiful?" He tilts your chin up as he awaits your answer. 
When you nod, he easily descends upon your lips, placing a sure hand behind your head as he deepens the kiss into something absolutely filthy. As soon as you break apart, he kisses your shoulder, then down your spine.
Tashi guides you back to her. You allow her nails to tangle in your locks as she forces your head back down against her arching hips.
"Shit," Patrick huffs, rough hands reaching for the globes of your ass while Art's smoother ones trail up your spread, inner thighs. Tashi tugs at his dick a little harder, which has him panting against her lips.
Tashi gasps as you flick at her clit then quickly move to tease her entrance with the tip of your tongue. You flatten your tongue, dragging it across her length and repeat the motion until she whines for you to stop. 
You slurp the combination of drool and slick as you pull away with a pussy-drunk smile. She meets it with a panting, dazed one and removes her hand from your hair to push her own out of her eyes while Patrick sucks at her neck.
"Ah!" You startle forward into Tashi's tits as Art finally breeches your entrance with his index finger. 
"Eat our girl out, Art," Tashi motions for Art to lie down under your spread form to get a better angle. You can't deny that the new nickname drives you a little crazy. "Show her she's ours."
Art's soft hands draw another moan out of you as they assuredly grip your hips to keep you in place while he unleashes teasing licks against your pussy.
Tashi draws you back to her. You'd know that look anywhere—she's ready to cum.
"I want you," Her breath hitches around your name while your tongue steals the rest of her coherent words until she's a withering mess under your touch. 
Her pornstar-worthy moans ring out across the room like a beautiful symphony. Tashi's wanton noises coupled with the wet whines you're unleashing against her folds until the two of you create the lewdest duet this hotel's ever heard. 
She arches against the bedframe as she tells you her near release, tugging at your hair as she draws closer and closer to the edge.
Panting, she draws you against her lips for a sloppy, uncoordinated kiss. 
"Fuck, Tashi," You groan against her plump lips, feeling your own impending orgasm drawing near. "You're so fucking hot, I-"
She cuts off your rambling with another wet kiss. Her tongue flicks out to tease yours before sucking it into her mouth with a lewd slurp. Your hand works alongside hers to leave her shaking and whimpering against your lips as she comes undone by your hand. You smack her cunt lightly, eating the groan she feeds into your open mouth as she rides it out.
Tashi eats your moans as they echo against your messy tangling of lips and tongues.
Art's fingers start to pick up a pace as Patrick, feeling left out, starts thrusting his throbbing cock in the middle of your sapphic kiss with Tashi. You eye the two with half-lidded eyes as you share Patrick's cock with her. After only a few moments in your mouth, Patrick pulls out and releases across Tashi's and your expectant tongues.
"So fucking good to me," Patrick pants as he splatters the last of his come across your faces with a shaky groan. "Best fucking orgasm ever, swear it," He says as he encases his lips around yours, swapping his cum between your mouths before moving to Tashi to do the same.
Art moves out from under you, offering your knees relief as he lays you back against Tashi's stomach to fuck into you.
It's a slow and cruel pace, only made crueller by how Patrick and Tashi touch you like they already know where you want to be touched. Each brunette takes a side, Patrick sucking your tit into his mouth while Tashi's mouth draws you in for a kiss. Her nails tickle at your other erect nipples until you're arching off of her and into Art's thrusts, making him whimper.
"Just like that," Art whines your name. "You're so fucking tight."
It's when Patrick and Tashi move their attention down to your clit that you know you're fucked. Patrick spreads your folds with two fingers, watching as intensely as Art does as his cock disappears in and out of your hole.
"He could've never made you feel like this, right?" Tashi rasps. "He has no strategy, no real game. Just a fucking waste of space. Could never make you feel this good, this loved."
You don't need her to say his name, you know what she means. You're panting, shaking your head against her shoulder. "Never."
"Told ya," Patrick laughs into your skin. "Make her cum, Art. C'mon, man." 
"Fuck- please," You whimper, nodding. "I need to come, baby-" Without warning, you arch off of Tashi. Neither she nor Patrick stops their jerks against your clit as you gasp, eyes rolling back in your head with the thrum of a second wave creeping up on you with a steady building heat. Waves of pleasure roll over you as the tantalizing sensations become too much. You come loudly, arching pathetically off the bed as you desperately reach for Art, to hold him.
You're wriggling in Tashi and Patrick's arms as Art pulls out and releases across your expanding and retracting stomach as you pant out the remnants of your orgasm. 
"Shit," He moans, and his voice sends waves of aftershock across your body while his steady hands draw you against his naked chest for a toe-curling kiss.
You'd never been happier to have invited Patrick Zweig to your engagement party.
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waltricia · 3 days
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Regardless of whether anyone actually reads this, I need to show appreciation for the writing, blocking, and editing of the last scene of 3x03, “Forces of Nature.”
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Recently, I noticed that the LW line “this author is captivated” was very specifically placed over a shot of Colin and I knew it was intentionally done to convey the double meaning of the narration being about her and him.
Since then, I’ve realized that the same thing is happening throughout that entire LW narration. And it is fucking BRILLIANT.
So, first of all, this is the transcript of the narration:
“This author believes that all of man’s greatest inventions are nothing more than a distraction from what is most natural to us. Our instincts. The innate animal impulse that is inside even the most sophisticated of us. For when all is said and done, our nature will always win out. It seems Lord Debling’s instinct has led this man of nature to the most surprising pick of the season in Miss Penelope Featherington. Suffice it to say, this author is captivated. For in the battle between man and nature, it is quite clear that the battle is in fact between man and himself.”
Now I’m going to break it down with captioned stills so that you can see which words line up with which frames and I’ll explain what I believe it all means.
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“This author” - When it’s first said, it’s on Pen. The second time it’s on Colin. I think there are several meanings here. Firstly, she’s Whistledown and she’s published. He will be, assuming he publishes his travel journals or whatever. Secondly, I think it highlights how they will be united, in the Whistledown storyline along with everything else. There’s a third meaning, but I’m going to get back to it later, once we get to the second use of “this author.”
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This is the Innovations Ball, so on the surface, LW is speaking about man-made technology versus the natural world. But with the introduction of “man,” the shot immediately cuts to Colin, so the second layer of the narration is about him. All of Colin’s invented personality traits are a cover, hiding his true self- his sensitivity and his feelings for Pen. Obviously, this echoes what she wrote about him in 3x01, but it’s different. The context is the same, but this time, she’s not speaking directly about him, and really, she may very well not be thinking about him at all in writing it. After all, she still doesn’t know about his feelings for her. But we know. And the feeling of what she’s saying this time is less jarring; more, fittingly, natural. Because he’s starting to confront all of it as well.
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In this shot, Colin has been walking across the room to get to Pen. There were people on his right, obstructing his view of her, but as LW says “natural,” Colin passes those people and, though we cannot yet see Pen, we can tell from Colin’s face that he finally clearly can. She is what is most natural to him.
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He comes up to her and says that he has a question for her. The narration starts again. But on this shot, it’s only the one word, “our.” Aside from this just being romantic, I think it highlights that the narration is about both of them. But I also think that it’s not just about them. It feels to me as if, metaphorically, it’s written by both of them. Hence, my emphasis on the importance of “this author.”
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We cut to our first close-up of Colin in this particular intimate sequence of close-ups. And we’re really in his perspective now, as he’s struggling to manage his feelings.
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Again, he had been masking, trying to be like the other “sophisticated” gentlemen.
But a shift is occurring within him.
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And this where I really hope there is at least one other person out there paying attention because all of the elements are coming together to tell us something incredible here. We have our beloved Julie Andrews delivering the line with a profound heaviness. We have Kris Bowers’ “Call Me Simon” coming to a close, sounding like a clock striking midnight. And we have the decisive sentiment of the words themselves. I'm convinced that the words “done” and “win out” being said on Pen speak to the finality of Colin’s feelings. If there was uncertainty before, it is gone now and there is no turning back. He is in love with Pen.
But before Colin can say anything else, Debling steps in and takes Pen away to dance.
Side note: Amazingly, I can back up my theory with this shot and another one of my theories:
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I had said, when the trailer came out, that when true red shows up behind Colin, that indicates his love for Pen. This is the first time we see that happen.
But anyway, back to Whistledown…
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Debling is the literal “man of nature,” while Colin is the metaphoric “man of nature.” Both have picked Pen.
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We’ve finally come to the second “this author” and here’s the third thing I wanted to say about it: Possibly my favorite thing about this sequence, is that it acts as a vehicle for the representation of the Polin role reversal. From one end of the Whistledown narration to the other, Pen and Colin literally and metaphorically switch places, seamlessly. They exchange their physical places in the room. She’s the wallflower, then he’s the wallflower. She’s the author, then he’s the author. In a metaphorical sense, they’re both writing this Whistledown piece. This whole sequence serves to show us how Colin and Pen have really been equal this whole time. They’re just star-crossed. It’s like what Luke has been saying in interviews, Colin and Pen keep missing each other. They have brief moments where they eclipse each other and then they slip right past until the next time they orbit around to each other again.
Ok, here’s the final stretch, and it is a fucking fascinating maneuver:
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The battle isn’t between Colin and Debling. In fact, Debling doesn’t signify at all here. I’d say there are actually three other battles being referenced: Colin and himself, Pen and herself, and Colin and Pen. The first “man” of that sentence is said on Colin, while “nature” is said on Pen. So in the battle between Colin and Pen- for there is a battle, as Cressida will mention in 3x04 when she says “Eros and Psyche, battling it out”, and also there will be more blatant battling in part 2- the real battles Colin and Pen are facing are the ones within themselves.
Of course I’ve already written about Colin’s battle with himself.
The reference to Pen’s battle with herself is particularly interesting to me. At first, I didn’t see it and I didn’t understand why that bit of the narration was spoken over the Pen and Debling dance instead of over Colin. Then I realized that the second “man” of that sentence is said directly on top of this shot where, again, it’s not about Debling; it’s her face we’re seeing. Then, Debling spins her and the “himself” is on Pen too. And I know I’m right about this because the shot was in the trailer and I watched it so many times. And I noticed that Sam Phillips is very specifically looking away from the camera in this moment. I figured it was because we had to know that the moment was about her. And I was right.
Pen’s journey is her reconciliation with herself. Colin and Pen really have the same inner battles. They both need to drop their masks. That’s why the mirror scene is going to be so important- it’s about exposing and embracing the bare parts of both of them. They are already equal and united. They just need to see it.
Ok that’s it. I’m done. I got it out. And I literally can’t add any more images to this post. To anyone who will have read this fuckin novel I just wrote, thanks for sticking around. These ballroom sequences are particularly difficult for the cast and crew to do, and there is obviously so much complexity in this one, so I feel like it should all be acknowledged. Someone has to acknowledge it, and if that has to be me, I will gladly continue using up my Friday afternoons to do so.
To the cast and crew, to the captain of the season 3 ship, Jess Brownell, to the director, Andrew Ahn, and writer, Eli Wilson Pelton, to everyone’s favorite choreographer/movement director, Jack Murphy, to Luke, Nic, and Julie fuckin Andrews, I see you and I love you. Please keep doing what you’re doing. It’s all worth it. ♥️
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lani-heart · 2 days
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|| series masterlist || next // previously ||
genre(s) -> angst, fluff, smut, non-idol, hybrid au, poly au paring(s) -> ( eventually ) ATEEZ x reader warning(s) -> mentions of violence, mention of putting down / death, etc. words -> 2.4K
abstract -> “I hope we can get along” 
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y/n's perspective
San has been spending more time with me to try to remember. He’s refused to actually spend time alone in his room but also refused to go out with me. I had to go to the hospital for a change in my bandages but recently Yeosang and Wooyoung have been very adamant on bringing one of them with me. I couldn’t do that however, since I needed someone to look over San. 
I saw this as an opportunity to patch things up with Hongjoong. He’s been trying to find his place here but when he tries, he ultimately fails. 
He was firstly banned from the kitchen and Seonghwa refuses to have him help him clean saying he’s clumsy. Yeosang and San never really assigned themselves roles except when Yeosang chose what I wear. 
Hongjoong felt that he was out of place even though he had been helping… quite a lot with San. He couldn’t match his strength but did help hold him down when he turned… aggressive. San has been having night terrors of his past in the fighters ring, luckily however he hasn’t turned aggressive on any of us. 
I’ll mostly however just have San with me as I write my novel revamped like old times. 
“I don’t want you to go,” he said as he gripped my waist firmly and I sighed. “Sannie, I have to but I'll be back soon okay? Do… you want me to bring you anything?” I asked and he shook his head. 
“Just come back” he muttered and I smiled. “I always do,” I said and he nodded. “I know, '' he muttered and I knew his memories were there… they just confused him. He says that he knows that he attacked me, he remembers it clearly and he’s starting to remember his time in the kennel and meeting Wooyoung.
I left my room in hopes of getting to see Hongjoong. 
“y/n… are you leaving already?” Wooyoung asked? I nod as I notice his worried look. “Yeah, but it should be fine, don’t worry–” “You should take Wooyoung with you” Yeosang cut me off and I smiled softly. “You know he doesn’t like places like that… besides the doctor doesn’t allow hybrids inside and I’d rather not trigger an attack or episode,” I said while smiling at Wooyoung. He looked upset but I didn’t want to jeopardize his mental health. 
“I’ll go with you,” Yeosang said and I shook my head. “I need you to help with San,” I said and he sighed. “Can I go?” I heard and I saw Seonghwa. “He’s scared of hospitals… especially doctors,” Hongjoong said while getting hit by Seonghwa for catching his lie. 
“Then why don’t you come with me?” I asked Hongjoong and he looked at me confused and shocked. “He’s the one who–” “Yeosang… second chances remember?” I asked and his eyes widened slightly before looking away. “I’m ready when you are Hongjoong!” 
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hongjoong’s perspective
I don't understand why she wanted me to go? I get that she needed the canine hybrids to help with San and his disturbed memory. However, I couldn’t let Seonghwa go knowing he had a fear of doctors and hospitals… he would’ve been panicked and upset. 
But why would she trust me?
The walk was silent… I made sure to keep an eye on her and she only walked with a smile on her face. Why? When we made it to the hospital I was glared at by the paramedic who saved her… he was her friend I believe. 
“y/n!” he said happily and I saw that her face had a smile to see the man. 
“I can see you chose to trust the tiger that caused these wounds,” he said while pointing at her bandaged jaw… I didn’t want to show him how I felt but I also couldn’t help but look at the ground. Why was I even here?
“This is Hongjoong… and it's okay, everything was a misunderstanding on both our parts,” she said and I sighed, "How was she so forgiving? “Well maybe you should have Kun do special training with him like he did with Yeosang '' he suggested… 
Yeosang did special training?
“Here, just sign in and I'll tell the doctor you’ve arrived,” he said as he left and she started answering some questionnaire he gave her… I didn’t notice how lost in my thoughts I was when I heard her ask me
“Are you okay?” she asked while I nodded not wanting to worry her. “I noticed you aren’t bad with others… you just have a lot of mistrust,” she said and I sighed. 
“You don’t have to be scared of anyone,” she assured and I didn’t want to accept that. 
“What did he mean?” I asked and she looked at me confused. “Yeosang? He did training?” I asked and she nodded. “He had many behaviors that he had trouble with stopping. It was mainly because of his training by his old owner it was hard to override it,” she said and I understood what she meant. 
“Would it help me?” I asked and she shook her head with a comforting smile. “It's the same reason why San isn’t doing any training… you can’t be around strangers and Kun won’t risk that” she said and I knew that it was a reasonable explanation. 
“Hongjoong I know you’re sorry… you don’t have to try so hard you know? I didn’t give you any reason to trust me and you were a hybrid who just escaped hell. We both didn’t make an effort.” she said and I shook my head. That was my fault… I made her doubt herself. 
“Do you know what you ripped that day?” She asked and I felt my body freeze… I knew it was some draft of a book she was writing… all I read was that it was named Circus. It angered me to think I inspired some fictional story for others to enjoy… based on my life of suffering.
“There's this character named Jum… he’s a lion hybrid. I first started with circus being a hybrid story of two hybrids who were mistreated and how they’d end up dead because of the hands of their ring leader–” she explained and it did remind me of the actual circus 
“–but then I added another hybrid and now it's gone. It originally was gonna end sadly. I restarted my story however, I added two more hybrids wanting to make almost a rebellion-type story” she explained…
A rebellion?
“The hybrids will end up escaping and defying society. Government laws will purge themselves and ultimately become an apocalypse-type end” she spoiled and I almost liked the sound of that. 
“Jum is inspired by you,” she said and I was shocked… just how did she see me? “He’s a lion hybrid… star of the show. He’s gonna lead the other hybrids to escape,” she said with a smile and I was shocked she’d give me such a big role in her book. 
“You’re the protagonist… it used to be San in my other version. But you naturally lead so I thought it was better to be inspired by you” she said and I smiled softly… It made me feel happy that she saw me that way and not in a bad way.
“y/n?” I heard as I saw the nurse call her. “They don’t let hybrids in so you can wait. Here and don’t rip it to shreds this time” she joked as he handed me a draft…
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Hybrids, an experiment gone wrong. Human hybrids of animal counterparts. Animals but also humans. Considered disgusting creatures morally disgraceful.  Below Humans… until they decided to embrace their animalistic counterparts. Seen as pets, attractions, objects.  Standing in front of a stadium of people doing dangerous tricks that a normal person would never dream of doing… only to be cheered for almost dying.  To do degrading acts against our will… “Jum!” I heard as I saw the ringleader command me to behind the curtains… where I'd be stuck in a cage rotting for the rest of my life…  “You’ll be sharing a cage from now on,” a clown said as he pushed me into the cage where I saw the leopard hybrid. “Hello… I'm Si-woo” he introduced. He looked scared… confused as to what was happening.  “Where do you come from?” I asked curious as to who I would be performing with from now on and sharing a cage with. “My owner sold me. She decided I was too old to keep so she sold me to the man in charge,” he explained making me scoff.  Age, Species, and Appearance were important for humans when it came to hybrid collecting. “How long have you been here?” he asked softly. “All my life” I answered. “HEY! WATCH IT!!” I heard as I saw them now put a black and tabby cat hybrid in a cage. The black hybrid thrashing around in protective equipment. “Make sure that black cat gets punished later” I heard and I sighed. New recruits… I wonder how long they’ll last.  “Yong calm down! They’ll kill you if you continue behaving this way” the tabby cat softly said. “Tch! Don’t you get it Kyong! We’re gonna die here!” he yelled.  “What?” Si-woo said and the cats now looked at us.  “What? Did you assume you're here to learn tricks? They’ll use us until we’re dead.” Yong said and I agreed. “We can’t stay here! I-I don’t wanna die!” Si-woo yelled and I sighed. “As long as you behave, you won’t die” I heard a familiar voice.  Yeong was the only hybrid allowed outside. He was one of the popular acts with the magician… and is considered the best-behaved hybrid here.  “HEY! You can get us out!” Kyong exclaimed… how naive was he? “And risk my life for you? No way” he said and the hybrids physically deflated.  “Jum, you know the rules” the rabbit warned and I rolled my eyes. “Don’t you wanna leave?” Si-woo asked and the hybrid scoffed. “Where would I go? I would be adopted just to get mistreated there? I’d rather be here and play human than out there” he said and the cats glared.  Outside wasn’t safe… not until hybrid laws were outlawed. “So we live here? Until we die?” Si-woo muttered. “It’ll only last a few years if you're lucky,” Yeong said while looking at the ground. He was a hybrid in charge of the rules… played human but I could see the guilt in his eyes when a hybrid died. “If you’re lucky it’ll be painless,” I said and I knew this wasn’t right… but what could I possibly do? It's not like I could start a movem– 
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“All done!” I heard as I looked up to see y/n. She had a change of bandages but otherwise looked fine. “Do you think it’s okay for now?” she asked and I couldn’t help but feel shocked. 
How did I judge her so wrong?
“Hongjoong?” she said and I smiled softly while handing her the story with shaky hands. “I’d love to read it some more,” I said and she smiled brightly. “Maybe you can help me!” she said as we started walking out of the hospital when I saw a boy probably her age maybe even younger?
“y/n!” he said happily while smiling almost like a samoyed dog hybrid would… “Jeno! How are you? I hope Johnny isn’t working you too hard” she said and he chuckled. “No… not yet anyway. And you?” he asked and she smiled. “Working but so far everything is okay,” she said and he nodded while staring at me cautiously… 
I knew they all looked at me as a threat… they also looked at the panther the same way as well as even the Doberman
“Make sure to be safe. There's been pickpockets… a lot of people have lost their wallets,” he said and I scoffed… pathetic.
“Huh?! I lost cash, probably two hundred dollars worth” she said and I was shocked… usually someone was with her so how did they manage to steal from her?
“Most people lost their entire wallets,” he said and I scoffed… I wouldn’t allow them to steal from her again.
“I will, I have Hongjoong with me! He’s probably the most intimidating besides San” she said and the boy nodded. “Be careful… and no more emergency room visits” he scolded as they said their goodbyes.
“Don’t go too far” I said as I grabbed the back of her shirt to be closer and she chuckled. “Don’t worry too much! The only times I've lost money were when I was alone” she said and I nodded. “I need to protect you” I confessed and she smiled. 
“No you don't–” “I do… it's the least I can do for you. I’m not good at other things. I can’t cook like Wooyoung or Seonghwa, I just end up making more of a mess when I try to clean–” “You don’t have to be… just as long as you're happy” she said cutting me off with a genuine smile and I felt my tail wag slowly… something it hasn’t done I think ever. 
“I will protect you… no matter what you say” I vowed and she smiled. “Thank you, Hongjoong,” she said and I nodded. That would be my purpose… protect her. 
We walked in a peaceful silence when I noticed a tall man looking at her… he smelt like a dog hybrid. He looked at me as he panicked and hid…
A hybrid was the pickpocket.
I soon saw another big hybrid come out and point at her but before I could growl at them—
“Hongjoong… I hope you’re happy by the way. I don’t want you to hate me… not hate anyone from the apartment even if you don’t consider it your home” she said and I sighed. I didn't at first… I hated you, thought you were another hybrid collector, another consumer who’d enjoy the stupid two-hour show of the circus. 
“I really do… I like my new home and I’ll do anything to protect it even if that means going against my own species” I said while looking up at the two hybrids… though I knew it wouldn’t make sense to her. 
“I just hope you don’t feel like the beginning where you hated me” she said softly and I smiled. 
“I don’t think I could hate you… I was wrong about you so let’s just go home”
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chaos-in-deepspace · 3 days
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LNDS: Hospital Trip | Fluff
Listen...this was supposed to be a crack fic. Apparently when I write long form fics I can't help but take it seriously. So this is romantic comedy now. It's fluff. I'm not a Zayne girlie but damn do I adore him...I might be a Zayne girlie. And a Rafayel girlie. And a Xavier girlie...I'm a whore.
Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+. Warnings: Crack treated seriously, But also is this really crack anymore?, Romance mixed with comedy, flirting, Blood, Leg injuries, stitches, shots (the not fun kind) Synopsis: You had been enjoying your day when a small incident led you to the hospital. Thankfully your beloved boyfriend is taking care of you, but he does demand an explanation at to how you got injured...something you'd rather he not know. Word Count: 4,159
Blog Information | Masterlist
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Zayne
Hospital Trip | Zayne x Reader
You let out an unamused huff as you leaned against the back of the hospital bed, looking off in the distance. Your leg was on fire at the moment and you weren’t exactly happy to be in the hospital. Thankfully Yvonne had been sweet enough to allow you to see Dr. Zayne about your injury (even though she insisted that Dr. Greyson was available immediately and Zayne was finishing up a surgery, you didn’t care.)
You perked up as you heard the door open, smiling the moment you saw Zayne. You weren’t even sure if he was aware that you’d be his patient as Yvonne didn’t bother getting you checked in. He looks up from the paperwork in his hands, seeing that you were sitting on his examination table with a dopey grin.
“To what do I owe the pleasure?” He said, his voice soft as he adjusted his glasses. He clearly hadn’t noticed that something was amiss as you shifted on the table.
“Well, you see…” You said, shifting more to show the inner part of your thigh. The thigh that happened to be getting blood on his examination table. The way you were sitting had helped it not pool too much, and the nurse that helped you in the room did place a small tourniquet around your leg (although in all honesty it wasn’t that bad).
Zayne paused at seeing the injury, looking at you and then back at your bloody thigh. His lips pressed together as he nodded in disappointment, realizing that you had probably given some nurses hell as they tried helping you and you refused. The hospital was used to your antics, especially when it came to your doctor. Unless you were dying, you insisted on seeing Zayne for everything.
He approached you, placing a hand over a section that didn’t have blood on it. You were grateful to be wearing shorts today so you didn’t have to take off your pants for this…although the thought of waiting for Zayne in his office in only your underwear was an amusing thought. An idea for another day.
The feel of his cold hand had you instinctually opening your legs up more for the man. He looked back up at your face and you couldn’t help but wiggle your eyebrows suggestively at him.
“Is there a reason this hasn’t been treated yet? How long have you been here?” He asked, finally taking his hand away from you.
“Um, maybe ten minutes? I told them it wasn’t that bad and I’d wait for you.” You told him and he shot you a look. He sighed, going over to see that the nurses had already gotten him a tray of items he’d be needing.
You wouldn’t lie, you had gotten nervous when you saw the nurse wheeling the tray in and seeing it had items for stitches. You really didn’t think your injury was that bad. Granted you couldn’t feel your leg at the moment, but that's besides the point.
“If your leg is in this condition, you should’ve allowed another doctor to tend to it.” Zayne scolded, walking over to the sink and washing his hands.
You hummed before smirking, “Well I figured you wouldn’t like having one of your coworkers between my thighs, since you are the jealous type.” You teased him. Zayne shot you a small glare, but you knew he wouldn’t stay mad for long.
“Leave the suggestive comments please. There is nothing sexual about a doctor tending to their patients.” He said, pausing and letting out another long sigh. You wondered what was causing him so much grief since you saw a flash of something in his eyes as he remembered something, “I need you to take your shorts off.”
You barked out a laugh, “Nothing sexual my ass.” you said, going to unbutton your shorts, “I’m surprised you’re letting me take them off, you’re always so eager to be the one doing it back home.” 
“I said to leave the comments.” He said, placing gloves onto his hands as he approached you on the table.
“I can’t help it when you’re this easy to tease.” You winked before looking at the supplies he had been given, “So you gonna numb me up before you sew thread into my thigh?”
“I don’t know, should I be numbing you? If you have the energy to flirt, the pain must not be that bad.” He said, watching as you shucked your shorts off and placed them next to you on the bed. “Now might I be enlightened as to how this happened in the first place? If I’m not mistaken, today was your day off.”
You made a small, pained noise in the back of your throat as you thought back to what you had done. Nope. Absolutely not. He didn’t really need to know what had happened, did he?
“I tripped.” You lied, knowing he wouldn’t buy it for even a second. You’d rather tell him an obvious lie then do too good of a job and have him believe you. He always ends up finding the truth eventually, and when he finds out you actually lied to him, he always gets upset and distant. So you never did it to him. You’d give him the world’s fakest lie so he could tell right away.
“I’m not asking out of curiosity. I need to know if you might’ve gotten something in your wound. I need to know as your doctor.” A shiver went down your spine at the statement. There was always a difference between your sweet, caring boyfriend Zayne, and Akso’s Chief of Surgery, Doctor Zayne Li. You, of course, adored both sides, but seeing him switch to being Doctor Zayne was always hot.
“Fine, then I assume if you’re asking as my Doctor, then you won’t be judging me when I tell you?” You said, shifting in your spot. You really didn’t want to tell him. He was the best boyfriend ever but god damn could he give your sass back ten fold.
“Sadly doctor’s are entitled to judge whomever they please, we’re just not allowed to voice it to our patients or coworkers.” He said and you huffed. 
“You’re judging me right now, aren’t you?” You finally murmured.
“Always quick to catch on.” He had the audacity to smirk as he grabbed the shot that you assumed had the lidocaine in it and waved it in place to tease you.
“Asshole…” You said under your breath. He looked at you with his eyebrow raised.
“What was that, you don’t want to be numbed?” He asked and a small, pathetic whine came from you.
“I mean my beloved boyfriend who is so kind, caring, and compassionate. The boyfriend who will do anything to keep me out of harm's way and fixes me up when I have booboos in the nicest way possible.” You said, pressing your hands together and smiling at him.
He looked like he wanted to roll his eyes at your praise and you finally relaxed a bit, “I’m still waiting to find out what happened.” He reminded you.
"Okay, where to begin…” You said, tapping your lower lip, “Well I woke up a bit later than usual since I didn’t have work today. I went to the kitchen to get some breakfast and was going through the freezer when I noticed we didn’t have any ice cream left!” You began and Zayne gave you an unamused look.
At this point, Zayne was grabbing the alcohol wipes to begin cleaning off the blood so he could see the actual damage, “I don’t need a play by play of your day, darling, I need to know how you injured yourself.”
You chuckled at the pet name and Zayne smiled ever so slightly at the happy wiggle you did on the table, “Okay, but it’s all super important information.” You chided with a small waggle of your finger, “So I decided the best course of action would be to run down to the store and go buy some in case we wanted some ice cream tonight. So I got dressed and walked down to the corner store.”
“Did you actually manage to get any?” He asked and your smile fell.
“Well…of course I did. At first. I got the ice cream and it was all bagged up. I left the store after thanking this sweet new cashier, her name is Tamara by the way.” You said with a wave of your hand, “Then out of nowhere I heard this sweet little chirping and saw a baby bird was on the ground. Clearly he had fallen, but thankfully it had been in a bed of soft flowers.” You explained.
You watched as Zayne paused, thinking about what you said and shook his head, “Sit correctly please, I need to clean your wound.” He said, pushing your legs to a better position.
“Okay so clearly you know the corner store I’m talking about, ya? The one right by your apartment?” You asked.
“Our apartment? Yes, I recall. It’s the one that always has a sign outside with those drawings to draw people in on the newest products.” He said and you paused before giggling again at him calling it our apartment. You'd never get tired of that since you had only been living together for a short while.
“Then you know how there’s some construction going on right next to it. There’s that metal fence they put up to keep people out and there’s a tree right on the other side.” You said and Zayne nodded, “Well the nest was in that tree.”
“Of course, why wouldn’t it be in an easier to reach location?” He sarcastically murmured to himself. It was just loud enough for you to pick up, and you went to kick him before freezing at realizing it was your bad leg. The same leg that earlier you couldn’t feel, but when you made sharp movements apparently it was all you could feel.
“Well I couldn’t just leave the poor thing there to die, so I scooped it up and put it into my jacket pocket.” You said and Zayne made note that you didn’t seem to have a coat anymore. How curious.
You flinched away as Zayne began cleaning the wound, the alcohol burning but he held your leg in place as he continued dabbing at it. 
You cleared your throat, trying to not think about the sting, “So I managed to climb the fence without any issues thankfully. There were also no construction workers so I was all by my lonesome in my quest to put this birdie back in its nest.”
Zayne paused as he finished cleaning the wound, looking up at you from behind his glasses. You don’t know why you felt small under his gaze at the moment, especially since he was technically underneath you.
“Then I started to climb that tree to put the birdie back into its home. It wasn’t very high up in the tree thankfully, so it was easy enough to place him there.” You explained, happy about your accomplishment.
“I’m very proud that you managed to save a single chick by doing two very reckless things.” It was sarcastic as all hell, but you’d take the praise when you could get it.
“Thanks babe.” You said and he shook his head.
“This doesn’t explain how you ended up with a gash on your thigh.” He said and looked down at your legs, “Or why your legs have dirt on them…and probably future bruises forming.”
“Well, so the nest was home to an eagle! Can you believe it? It was very majestic looking as it began flying back to its babies.” You said, then you let out another hiss as he swiped a disinfectant of some kind over your wound. As if the alcohol wasn’t enough…
“Don’t mind me, continue your story.” He said and you got a sense he was almost amused now.
“Well apparently mama eagle wasn’t happy I was spending time with the babies because she swooped in to attack me. Obviously my natural reaction to an eagle coming for my throat was to flinch back. Sadly it caused me to fall from the tree and as I fell, I managed to catch my leg on a piece of the fence that was jutting out…thus ending in my giant gash and forming bruises.” You finally confessed.
You felt like an idiot, but honestly how were you supposed to know that would happen? You just wanted to save a baby chick that had fallen. Then BOOM! Eagle attack. To make matters worse you had fallen right on your ice cream and the concoction splattered all over your white jacket (alongside your blood since you used your jacket in an attempt to stop the bleeding) so you ended up just tossing them both away in shame.
You watched Zayne grab the needle that had the lidocaine in it and flicked it a few times to get the air pockets out, “And how, pray tell, did you get to the hospital? If the ambulance brought you in, you would’ve been treated in the ER right away. Since we’re having this conversation, it’s clear you didn’t make the right decision.”
“An ambulance would’ve been overkill.” You said and the look Zayne gave you said otherwise, “I just walked here. It’s only a few miles and the day was beautiful.”
Zayne could feel his eye begin to twitch at your lackadaisical response, “You walked miles with an injured leg that needed stitches. Did nobody try to stop you when they saw you trailing blood everywhere?” Oh he was a bit upset by this.
“Well people on the highway are normally like super busy and not looking at random people walking on the side of the road.” You said and Zayne seemed to be trying really hard to keep his cool at the moment. He wanted to properly scold you and tell you how stupid you had been; his worry wanting to turn to anger, but he held himself back. He didn’t want to lash out with emotions when he was trying to treat you as a patient. 
“Of course, you just casually walked on the side of a busy highway where a car might’ve hit you.” He couldn’t help but say in almost disbelief at the lack of self awareness. How he managed to fall for you was a mystery. He did absolutely adore you, but moments like this would only cause his hair to gray faster.
Zayne took the shot, carefully placing it on the edge of your gash and began injecting you with the medication. You let out a hiss of pain, the sensation being horribly uncomfortable. You held as still as you could though, wanting to tear up a bit from how bad it stung going in and watching as he moved it around wasn't helping.
“Are you making it hurt a lot because you’re mad at me?” Your voice came out in a dejected whine. Zayne had just pulled back the needle when he looked at you. He gave you a tired smile, his hand going to rub at the non-injured area of your leg.
“I apologize for the discomfort, but you should know that no matter how upset I am with you, I would never do something to cause you intentional pain like that.” He said, his hand feeling cool against your hot skin. It helped numb the pain, and as the medication slowly began working the entire area was numb to…everything.
You were surprised by how fast it worked, and even more surprised by how fast Zayne worked. He was already getting ready to stitch your leg up and you looked over at him with a cheeky grin.
“If you’re gonna sew up my leg, can you make a heart shaped design for me?” You teasingly asked.
“I’m a doctor, not a seamstress.” He said as you watched him grab the threaded needle and pressed it against your skin. As soon as it was about to go into your leg, you looked away. There was no way you’d be fine with watching him put a needle through your body.
It doesn’t take long for him to finish with the stitches, leaning back in his chair to check it over. You look down as well, a bit off put by stitches but at least it was going to heal properly.
Zayne began cleaning the wound and then grabbed the gauze, tapping your thigh to lift up as he wrapped it carefully. Once it was all wrapped up (sadly without a neat little bow like you requested) Zayne ran a finger gently over it.
“Does that feel better, darling?” he asked and you smiled, loving the nickname and nodding.
“Yes sir, feels a million times better…but I also can’t feel it at all so that might be why.”
“It’ll most likely feel sore and ache for the next few days. I’ll make sure to pick you up some painkillers from the pharmacy before we head home.” He said, going to take off his gloves and move the tray away from you.
“Thank you, doctor.” You finally said. Despite all your teasing, you really were happy he was the one treating you. You always felt the most comfortable when he was in charge of your care, after all.
Zayne looked over at you, adjusting his glasses on his nose and tilting his head, “Don’t think you’re off the hook. I haven’t forgotten what you did.” He said and you huffed.
“Now why did you have to say that?” You murmured, watching as he went over to his desk. He began typing things up on his computer, looking through some files it seemed. Once he saw what he needed, he clicked his tongue.
“We can discuss your actions when we get home.” he said, looking you over, “For now I’ll need you to wait here. I need to grab some things. It seems you’re due for a tetanus shot, and with your most recent endeavor of getting cut on a metal fence, I think now is the best time for it.”
“Wait…a shot?” You groaned, “Oh you’re mad, mad.” The accusation fell on deaf ears as he was already heading out the door. 
With another huff, you crossed your arms and looked at the clock. After only five minutes you decided you had enough and got on wobbly feet. You could barely feel your thigh still so it made it awkward, feeling almost like you were walking with a partially dead leg.
Still, you limped with purpose and eventually got to Zayne’s large desk. You didn’t care much for all the paperwork; most of it was medical jargon that went well over your head. No, you were curious about if he kept some of your gifts.
You opened up one of the drawers, smiling as you saw a sticky pad with little pears on it being the first thing in sight. You also saw a handful of pens that doubled as flowers. You felt all warm and fuzzy seeing how the items were clearly well used. 
Then you heard the door open.
You froze in place, staring at Zayne who was carrying a few items. You two made eye contact for a moment and he only sighed, shaking his head. It wasn’t like you could run away from him. You watched him close the door behind him and it clicked as it locked.
He walked over to you, placing the shot down on his surprisingly clean desk. He towered over you in that moment, making you feel small yet again. He went over, lifting you gently as he paid attention to your newly wrapped leg.
Your ass met the cool wood of his desk as he sat you on top of it, “Can’t you behave for five minutes?” He asked and you looked away to avoid eye contact.
“I wanted to see where you kept the candy…” You murmured, as it was half true. You didn’t want to admit you were checking to make sure he didn’t toss out your little gifts.
“Next drawer over.” He said and you looked over to see his hand grazing the edge of the desk, opening the drawer and grabbing the candy, “However only good patients get it. If you behave for your shot, I’ll give you a piece.”
You knew him damn well, he’d give you a mint no matter what happened. He was always a sucker for spoiling you, even when you were acting up and being a total brat.
“Alright, Dr. Zayne. I’ll be good.” You huffed, looking at the delicately wrapped mint in his hand. He placed it next to you, then went to grab his supplies. You watched patiently as he cleaned an area on your good thigh then grabbed the needle.
Once again, you can’t look at the needle as it goes into you. However, this time the feeling was so much worse. You cursed under your breath, your hands going to Zayne’s shoulders to grip onto for some stability. Thankfully Zayne didn’t falter as he finished up, taking the needle out and placing it next to you.
His gloves hand goes to rub soothing circles over the area in apology, before he grabs a plaster and places it on top where a small bead of blood was already trying to come out of.
“Are you alright?” He asked finally and you grumbled under your breath.
“Ya…” Your hands tightened on his shoulders, not wanting him to leave, but also being a bit upset at all the pain you had endured because of your antics. It wasn’t fair, why couldn’t you do stupid things without consequences?
One of Zayne’s hands cupped your chin, forcing your face up to look up at him, “You need to be more careful in the future, understood? You got off lucky with only a few stitches this time.”
A small whine comes from the back of your throat, your cheeks reddening at his proximity. Your eyes couldn’t help but glance down at his lips for a second before going back to his eyes.
It didn’t go unnoticed by Zayne as he leaned down, giving you a short and sweet kiss before parting. His lips found your cheek next, then your other, then finally your forehead. He leaned his forehead against your own as he looked at you.
“Let me finish up some of my paperwork then I’ll take you home. I don’t need you walking on this leg right now.” He said and you pouted. Who knew how long it would take for him to do all that paperwork, “I promise it won’t take long.”
“Fine…but do I get a reward when we get home for being so good?” It didn’t go unnoticed by you that Zayne was practically between your legs as he leaned over you. Your pants were still on the table across the room, and you desperately wanted him to just kiss you properly this time. You wanted to be gasping for air by the time he parted from you.
Zayne paused, noticing the current predicament before smirking. His hand left your chin, instead going to box you between his desk and body. He leaned closer, pressing his lips near your ear.
“You want to know what I’m going to do to you later?”
You shivered at his suddenly husky voice, your hands grasping onto the lapels of his lab coat. You bit your lip, feeling suddenly hot in your own skin.
“I’m going to have you lay in bed and make you drink plenty of water and rest while your leg heals.” He whispered in your ear.
You let out an annoyed groan as his body left your own, standing at full height as he went to begin cleaning. “That wasn’t sexy at all.” You complained.
“Falling from a tree and gashing your leg open is also rather…unsexy.” He said and you groaned, a small smile spreading on your lips. Touché Zayne, touché.
“Okay can we at least stop by and get ice cream on the way back, then cuddle on the couch while we watch a movie tonight? I think I deserve extra cuddles for the pain I’ve had to endure.” You said with a small pout.
“I find those terms to be rather agreeable. It’s a date.” He settled on. You giggled as he picked you up from his desk and took you back to the examination table. He placed you on a clean spot and handed you your pants.
Sometimes dating a doctor has its perks.
Sadly dating a spiteful doctor had plenty of downsides as you later learned that night. You, curled up against his chest, as he puts on a movie for you two to watch. A documentary…on eagles.
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joeyalohadream · 2 days
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i loveeee soft vulnerable gale and how you’ve been writing him in ur fic about his rough landing + when he’s sick in the stalag. could i request a little drabble on the heels of one of those situations where he needs bucky’s help to take a shower and it’s hard for him to accept it? i just think that’s so sweet and intimate but no worries if not!
Thanks for this prompt (soft, vulnerable Gale is my jam!)! I really enjoyed writing it! Continuation of my story, 'Another First' on AO3 (now a prequel to Part 2: their trip to London) Hope you enjoy reading it!
Also, I mentioned how I can't really write drabbles because I need more words... well...
Word Count: 2,157
Bucky dropped his bike outside the barracks door. He’d come back and secure it later after his excitement waned to a more manageable level and he’d shared the good news with Gale.
Three days in London. No missions, no responsibilities to a greater cause, no sneaking around, no sleeping sharing space with ten other men snoring away into the night. No, his only responsibility would be making sure Gale had the best time, whatever he chose for that to mean, whatever he was or wasn’t ready for. The only sound he’d fall asleep to after tonight for the next two would be Gale’s soft breaths, quiet even in slumber, sharing the same damn bed for the first time since they’d started this wonderful thing between them.
He smiled to himself as he pushed the door open slowly, trying to avoid the squeaky hinge he knew always echoed through their sleeping quarters just in case Gale had decided to take his advice and get some sleep after he’d eaten.
He huffed in fond annoyance when he fully entered the bay and saw Gale sitting up on his cot, still in the same clothes he’d had on for the mission. Blue eyes met his and he watched a small smile break out on the other man’s face when he noticed him. Bucky couldn’t help but smile back, especially when he saw his sheepskin draped over Gale’s lap like a blanket and his hands were folded under it.
They seemed to have the barracks to themselves, most of the men had been showering and getting dressed for an evening at the Officer’s Club when Bucky had left Gale with some hot food and the promise of returning with passes to their weekend getaway.
“Hey you,” Bucky greeted as took a seat on his own rack, directly across from Gale’s. Close enough that their knees touched in the space between.
“You secure us a victory Major?” Gale asked him, amusement clear in his eyes. Hope too, Bucky noticed.
“Sure did Buck!” He couldn’t contain his grin, not in the mood to tease or delay the good news. “Told you I would, didn’t I? Harding was three whiskeys deep when I caught up to him, and he accused me of riding the coattails of your aviation skills, but he agreed. You and me, three days in London. We can catch the first bus tomorrow morning at 0800!”
Gale just stares at him for a moment and Bucky watches as his words sink and a full smile, pearly white teeth on display and his favorite little dimple appearing on his cheek at the news.
“That’s great Bucky,” he tells him sincerely. “You did good.”
Bucky feels his face heat at the praise. He reaches his hand forward and covers Gale’s knee with his palm, gives it a squeeze.
“You and me Buck,” he tells him. “We’re gonna do it all right.”
Gale blushes, but the smile stays on his face, and he nods. “Sounds perfect, John.”
Bucky can’t stop smiling, anticipation a heavy feeling in his gut. He takes a moment to give Gale a once over and feels his smile slip a bit. He’s sitting rigid, holding himself still and Bucky doesn’t think he’s seen him move at all since he entered the barracks. The lines around his eyes are tense, despite his smile. When Bucky looks closer, he can see fine tremors wracking his slight frame and his smile drops completely.
“Hey now,” Bucky says. Gale’s smile has faded as well at the noticed change in Bucky’s expression. “Thought you said you’d tell me first thing if you started feeling worse Buck?”
Gale furrows his brows. He’s adorable, Bucky thinks.
“My heads fine Bucky, I promise,” Gale sounds genuine, but somethings wrong, Bucky can tell. “I ate every bite you brought me and I’m not nauseous. Ain’t dizzy either, so don’t even mention going back to that damn doctor.”
“Alright feisty,” Bucky laughs. “Cool your engines tough guy, I’m not planning on taking you anywhere except London.”
The sigh that Gale released was one of relief, but Bucky wasn’t done with him yet.
“Your head might be alright, but what about the rest of ya,” he squeezed Gale’s knee and ducked his head to catch the blue eyes. “You’re sitting real tense and I ain’t gonna lie Buck, it’s making me feel a little tense myself just lookin’ at ya.”
Gale looked back at him, an expression on his face that Bucky had seen many times before. It was a look that meant Gale was searching for something, trying to convince himself of something that he wanted to be true. Bucky hadn’t figured out all of the details of it yet, but he made sure whenever it was directed at him, he kept his expression open and let the adoration he felt for the other man shine in his eyes. It usually worked in his favor, and this was no exception.
“Feel dirty,” Gale admitted, his eyes slid away, gazing now at where Bucky’s hand was still covering his knee. “Smell like my fort.”
Bucky nodded but he knew his confusion was showing on his face.
“Okay,” he spoke softly, trying to be encouraging but missing the connection. Gale looked like he was in pain and that’s what Bucky had been trying to assess. Hygiene doesn’t seem like the most important topic when he’d just left the infirmary a couple hours ago.
Gale huffed, sounding frustrated. “I just want to go to sleep Bucky, forget about today. I’m tired John.” He tried to hunch over, but the action pulled a wince across his features and Bucky leaned forward.  
Bucky knew he was exhausted; he could see that. He was tired too; missions always drain them. But he’d seen the exhaustion in Gale’s face while he was laid up in medical and it had looked bone deep.
“Buck, help me out a little here,” Bucky pleaded. “What do you need?”
If he was exhausted, why wasn’t he taking a nap like Bucky had suggested early? He wanted to ask but he didn’t want it to come out patronizing and sometimes talking with Buck when he was like this was like walking a tight rope. One way and he’d open up, like he had earlier in the day, but another and he’d close in on himself.
Some days he reminded Bucky of an old dog that would curl up and hide under the porch when he felt sick. Waiting for it to be over rather than asking for help to get better.
“My back,” Gale breathed out, “and my shoulders. It all tightened up. Can’t even get my damn shirt off.”
“I can help with that Buck,” Bucky assured him, not seeing the problem. Gale had helped Bucky with his clothes, his boots, all of it on numerous occasions. Sometime because of the whiskey, but a few times because of exhaustion and illness. “You don’t even gotta ask.”
Gale looked up at him and Bucky wanted to reach out and shake him for a moment because he looked ashamed. Bucky knows he’s going to have to confess to Gale that he’s head-over-heels in love with him sooner rather than later, to hell with waiting for the perfect moment. It’s time for Gale to know, without a doubt that he’s loved and there’s no condition to it, nothing Bucky wouldn’t do for him.
“Bucky,” Gale’s voice was soft, laced with pain and discomfort and Bucky just wanted to hold him. “It hurts to move too much right now.”
Bucky’s heart squeezed but he kept his gaze on Gale’s face and Gale kept looking back, searching for something again.
“Can you help me clean up?” He practically whispered. “Can’t wash my hair like this and you know how much…” He trailed off, looking thoroughly embarrassed and Bucky couldn’t help the smirk that tugged at his lips.
“How much you love your luscious locks?” Bucky teased but gentled his tone immediately. “Don’t worry, I love em too.” He added with a smile that made Gale duck his face.
Bucky reached over and tapped his chin, forcing his eyes back up and waited till he had his full attention.
“Of course I’ll help you Buck,” he told the younger man, smiling but serious. “I’d do anything for ya.” He tried not to be offended by the surprise that flashed through those blue eyes for a moment before he smiled at Bucky and nodded.
“Thanks Bucky.”
“Come on, let’s do this,” Bucky stood and reached down to help Gale stand, steadying him when he tensed all over at the motion. “I’ll grab your stuff, you just stand there real still and look pretty.” He winked at him and moved to gather his towel and his toiletries, ignoring the quietly huffed, “shut up Bucky,” from behind him.
----
In the stall that was furthest from the door in the large washroom, Bucky gripped the back of the metal chair Gale was seated in and pulled it back so that the spray was hitting the youngers man chest now that his hair was thoroughly soaked.
It had been a hard battle to fight, to convince the injured man to use a chair at all, but with some gentle coaxing and a soft yet exasperated, “You’re kind of shit at taking care of yourself so just let me do it for a while,” Bucky had won.
Bucky squeezed a generous amount of Gale’s rather expensive shampoo into his hands and made a lather before placing his hands in the soft blonde hair and starting to scrub. He kept his motion gentle, tried his best to swipe his hand in the direction that kept the suds from getting into the cuts that littered that beautiful face. As he scratched his finger into Gale’s scalp, he heard a low moan escape and he couldn’t keep the smile off his face.
He absolutely hated that Gale was hurting, hated that he was in enough pain he couldn’t complete such a simple task on his own, but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t enjoying himself. Taking care of Gale was one his favorite things to do and being able to do it in such a physical, tangible way that clearly made Gale feel good, made his heart swell.
I wish I could wash his hair every day, the ridiculous thought came to his mind.
Gale groaned again as Bucky scratched his fingers through the shorter hair at the back of his neck. Bucky was sure that if the heat from the water hadn’t already turned Gale red, he’d see a blush painting his cheeks.
“Sorry,” Gale mumbled. “Feels good.”
“Don’t apologize,” Bucky scolded gently. “Feels good for me too.”
Gale scoffed, voice low, “Washing my hair makes you feel good?”
“Making you feel good makes me feel good, ya doofus.” Bucky chuckled softly. Gale seemed to melt under his hands and Bucky tried his best to keep his eyes on the top of Gale’s head but he was only human, so he let himself watch as Gale began to drag the bar of soap he’d been holding over his chest and stomach.
Gale moved the soap lower, and Bucky refocused his gaze on his favorite head of hair and thought, London, London, London.
Gale seemed to have finished because he let the soap fall from his grasp and he let his hands rest on the tops of his thighs, water running down his body rinsing away the suds, leaving clean, pink skin. Bucky took a deep breath and tried not to be jealous of the water.
“I don’t know what I did to deserve you,” Gale’s quiet voice broke the silence. “But I’m so damn glad you’re mine Bucky.”
Bucky’s breath hitched and he felt his eyes sting. He let his hands slide down to Gale’s shoulders and gave them a squeeze, already adding a massage to the list of things that were happening in London as he felt how stiff the muscles under his hands were.
“You deserve the whole damn world Buck,” he explained, keeping his voice low, enjoying the peace from the water and the steam. “And you just watch, I’m going to find a way to give it to you some day.”
A wet hand reached up and grabbed his own where it still lay on Gale’s shoulder.
“You already did give it to me,” Gale squeezed his fingers. “You are my whole world, John.”
“Damn you Gale,” Bucky laughed, but it came out closer to a sob. He couldn’t help himself, so he bent over, angled his head and placed a sloppy kiss to Gale’s wet cheek. “You’re gonna make a grown man blush, sweet talkin’ him like that.”
Gale laughed, “You’re one to talk. You make me blush fifty times a day.”
“My goal’s a hundred,” Bucky teased. “Now cover your eyes, I’m pushing you back under the spray.”
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cloudwhisper23 · 3 days
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I have been very late with the latest chapter of Back in the Nightmare, but in my defense, @pixlokita drew an art, and I just absolutely needed to write fanfic regarding the art, and color it. Luckily, this is still in relation to Back in the Nightmare. It's just further along. Hope y'all enjoy! (fic below the cut)
Evan could tell Cassidy was feeling down after Charlie’s birthday party. How could he not? She’d clung so close to him before, and after Michael brought her out of the rain with his skin paler than a sheet of paper, she’d seemed almost distant.
She still listened when he spoke, but she no longer offered any opinions. Cassidy just seemed… off. There had to be something he could do to cheer her up, right?
Evan wanted to go to Fredbear’s for once because of the whole thing. Charlie said it was a great place to make friends and hang out, and with the atmosphere at home lately, it would be best if he could avoid hanging out there. Elizabeth bickered with her group on their project every night, and it always put their father in a bad mood.
Cassidy plus his father never seemed to end well, as both of them were perfectly polite to each other in a vicious way. Cassidy probably had been right about his father not wanting him to have friends after all, it seemed. Maybe that was why Mike used to scare them off?
Shaking the thought away, Evan fiddled with the strap of his backpack uncomfortably. Mike was grounded, and Lizzie was going to Susie’s house, which meant Evan was also supposed to be going home. Father didn’t like them staying unsupervised, after all.
But Evan wanted to do something nice for Cassidy. She had to run home right after school, not elaborating on why, but it did give him a perfect chance to get her a gift.
He still hesitated though. If his father found out he hadn’t gone straight home… Well, he just had to avoid getting caught then. Evan checked that Fredbear was still hidden at the bottom of his backpack, and then set off for the diner.
The prize corner always had a wide variety of things to win, but Evan had no idea where to even start on a gift for Cassidy. Yet again, he found himself hesitating.
“You have your eyes set on anything in particular?” Evan startled at the boy who’d appeared next to him. Gabe Simmons. Someone who didn’t usually talk to him.
“Uh, well, not for me. I want to get a gift for a friend.”
“Cassidy.” Gabe shot him an amused look as he pointedly looked away. “It’s not a secret that she’s one of your only friends, dude.”
“If she’s one of my only friends, why are you talking to me?”
“I’m bored. And Charlie won’t be here until later.” Gabe shrugged. “Do you have any idea what she likes?”
“Well…” Evan trailed off. What did Cassidy like? She’d seemed interested enough in his Fredbear plushie, once he’d been forcibly given it back. She’d wanted a favor regarding her hair, desperate enough to ask Michael of all people to fix it. Something like that, maybe? “I was thinking about that hair clip.”
He pointed to the row of animatronic themed hair pins and clips. “She likes Fredbear well enough.”
“That’s hardly worth the effort,” Gabe replied, wrinkling his nose. “You could get that easy.”
“I’d rather get her something she actually likes than something she wouldn’t like that’s worth more,” Evan replied quietly.
Gabe regarded him curiously. “I think I misjudged you in the past, Afton. You’re not as bad of a guy as I was expecting.”
“Thanks?”
Gabe wandered off without another word.
Weird. Still, Evan needed to get the clip fast if he wanted to get home before he got caught.
He did not succeed. Despite the fact that Evan hadn’t spotted his father once at the diner, and he’d beaten him home, somehow he still found out that Evan hadn’t come straight home.
Evan gritted his teeth as he faced his punishment, determined not to scream. Still, the ruler stung against his bare arm, and Evan knew he was going to be wearing long-sleeved shirts for at least a week or two after this.
“Behave,” his father said sternly, gesturing for Evan to leave and close the door on the way out.
“Yes Father,” Evan answered quietly before going to his room.
Tomorrow is another day.
The hair clip burned in Evan’s pocket as he looked around before school the following morning. He wanted to surprise her with it, but he never usually had luck finding her before school. Today was no different. His mouth twisted downward, but Evan did not feel tears welling up. This was expected, after all.
The morning was chilly for once, and Evan felt a bit relieved that he’d been forced to wear longer sleeves today. The wind stirred the trees at the front of the school as Evan waited for the bell to ring.
He went through his classes in somewhat of a daze, not really paying much attention to anything. It struck him briefly that he didn’t really have any classes with Cassidy. None in the morning anyway.
His arm ached as he went from class to class, despite how carefully he was trying to carry his things without jarring it. Evan carried on the only way he knew how: by thinking about anything else.
Today’s distraction topic was, unsurprisingly, Cassidy. The way she normally hung on his every word with a faint smile, the way she checked in with him constantly and gave people a hard time if they tried to mess with him. It gave him a warm feeling to think about her, grateful that she’d decided to be friends with him, even if he still suspected he was some kind of pity project.
Lizzie liked to tease him about having a crush on her, but the thought didn’t bother him so much. If he had a crush, then he had a crush. And if considering the thought that he had a crush on Cassidy made his cheeks burn, then so be it. He wouldn’t be the first boy in the world to have a crush on a girl.
Thankfully, Evan only had to wait until lunch to talk to Cassidy. She seemed just as distracted as before, and it made Evan’s heart ache. Still, he forced a smile to his face and greeted her brightly.
She smiled back, a weaker smile than his own and poked at her food with disinterest. Cassidy hardly looked at him.
“Cass, are you feeling okay?” he blurted out. He hadn’t asked before, thinking that she probably hadn’t wanted to talk about it, but after remembering how she used to smile and talk to him, he couldn’t help himself.
She looked startled by the question, dropping her fork back onto the tray. “I-“
“You’ve just seemed so occupied lately, and I know I should mind my business and wait for you to be ready to say something, but I’m worried about you.”
“Oh…” Cassidy’s eyebrows creased at that, and it was the first time she’d seemed to actually absorb his words since Charlie’s party. “I guess I… Well…” Cassidy struggled to gather her thoughts. “I’ve been having nightmares. I didn’t want to say anything because I don’t think they’re as big of a deal as yours, and I didn’t want to devalue your problems.”
“Cassidy, we’re friends. Just because I have constant problems doesn’t mean you can’t talk about yours at all. Besides, I’ve been doing better since Mikey started letting me sleep in his room again.” Evan put his hand on her arm reassuringly. “I’m here to listen, if you need to share.”
Cassidy smiled weakly. “Thanks, Ev. It’s probably stupid, but when I was at that party, I thought I heard something outside, and I went to go see. When I tried to get back in, the door was locked. And then…” Cassidy trailed off, her left hand twitching before resting on top of Evan’s. “Well, this car started coming up the alley way, and I just felt so scared, scared like I’ve never felt in my life, and I ran away from it, but it felt like the car was chasing me. So I’ve been having different dreams where I do get caught by the car, and sometimes I die, sometimes I watch other people die, and… yeah…” Cassidy squeezed his hand tightly.
Evan’s eyebrows scrunched tightly. “Have you told anyone besides me?”
“No,” Cassidy admitted. “But I don’t want to worry anyone.”
“Maybe at least tell your brother? I’m sure he’d want to know if you’re struggling to sleep or focus, Cass.”
Cassidy shrugged. “It won’t change anything. Travis would just worry. And he’s not tiny like you and your brother. If I tried to sleep in my brother’s bed with him, I would fall off the bed and hurt myself.”
“I’m not that small!” Evan protested, but he saw Cassidy’s point. Weirdly enough, it presented the perfect opportunity for him. “But, I may have an idea for you.”
“Yeah? Is it to get a ratty old Fredbear plush and carry it everywhere?” Cassidy asked skeptically. “Because I don’t think that works for everyone.”
“That implies that I do it because I want to,” Evan muttered to himself, but he shook his head at Cassidy, digging into his pocket. “No, I was thinking something a bit more your style.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, something like this.” Evan pulled the hairclip from his pocket. “I went to Fredbear’s yesterday and won it at the prize counter. Think of it as a way for me to defend you from your nightmares.”
Cassidy blinked at him, her mouth opening like she wanted to speak. Then she closed her mouth and blinked again. It took Evan a moment to realize she was speechless. And about to cry?
“It’s, um. If you don’t want it, it’s no big deal-“
“No, that’s very sweet actually,” Cassidy interrupted him, pulling her arm from under his hand. “Can you help me put it in? On the right side?”
“Oh, sure.” Evan fumbled with the hairclip, and Cassidy laughed lightly as he got to his feet to put the clip in her hair. “Like that?”
“A little further up,” Cassidy guided his hands, and Evan was sure his face was on fire. “Right there.”
Evan sighed in relief as he retracted his hands. His sleeve had slipped a little ways down his arm, and he quickly pulled it back down. Not fast enough, apparently, as Cassidy frowned.
Her eyes fixed on his sleeve, and she reached out to grab his elbow. Evan let her push his sleeve back to reveal the raw, bruised skin. “What happened here? Did-“
“I got in trouble.” Evan bit his lip and glanced away. “Mike is grounded, and if I’m not supervised, then-“
“Your dad did this?” Cassidy’s voice seemed tight, but Evan squeezed his eyes shut instead of looking at her expression.
“Yeah. But it’s better to face smaller fears than big ones, right?” Evan replied weakly.
Cassidy fell silent again. Her grip tightened on his elbow, and she let out a quiet sigh. “You’re unbelievable.”
“In a good way, though. Right?” Evan finally turned back to Cassidy. She seemed on the verge of tears as she looked at him.
The faintest smile came across her face. “Of course. Of course, Evie.”
She dragged him into a tight hug, and Evan hugged her back, unable to make himself care about how things looked to the rest of the room.
Everything was going to be just fine.
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duskwoodraven · 2 days
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I feel moved to speak, sooner rather than later because I believe time is of the essence and this needs to be understood in order to keep Moonvale from crumbling to the ground completely.
This is not completely spoiler heavy, but it will discuss the game. I should note that unfortunately I have not finished the episode because I am struggling with the mini games in making progress. So I do not know how the episode ends, but I need to say this in order for me to rest.
I am very angry and disappointed with this game, and even more than that, I hold a great deal of second hand embarrassment for Everbyte.
One of the greatest reasons I respected these developers during Duskwood is that the game never felt like a cash grab like so many games do these days. The option to make a one time payment for complete access to Duskwood was fantastic, an option they should have carried to here and that is the biggest grievance I have.
There is no reason a game should cost hundreds of dollars to experience and enjoy. There is no reason for the prices of gems to be as expensive as they are. This is unacceptable Everbyte, and you should feel ashamed of it, you should know better.
The beauty of Duskwood and what set it apart was its feel of realism and the fact that every question had a reasonable answer. Your use of AI art has cheapened the look of your game, not enhanced it, not to mention it’s insulting to use generated art when there are many artists who are already losing jobs to AI, artists who would have been happy to work with you if given the chance. If the cost of commission is too high, then use of stock photos you had before was just fine, and I believe you should have kept it, I can’t look at Ash and Charlie’s profiles without it striking me as goofy.
Furthermore, the story does not make sense, we were able to read chats because Jake made it possible for us, now it just feels like the return of a gimmick with no explanation, the same with the mini games, in the past we did mini games to “hack” into Hannah’s cloud, now we do it “just because”. It’s lost its feeling of meaning, not to mention most private chats are behind the gem paywall, which we never had to deal with before!
The characters seem more plain to me, or maybe they are loveable but I’ll never know because again, paywall. I can’t read the premium options and get to know them deeper because of it. There are also no profiles like before, which is awful because we can’t look back on past video calls and links and we can’t see what these characters are all about, their personality is gone.
Even MC’s answer options seem blander, more vanilla, repetitive or one directional.
I say this truthfully from my soul, if this was the style of of game you dropped but for Duskwood instead, I never would have played it.
I would have never fallen in love with it.
I would have never made this blog and would never have waited years for every episode and a new game.
I would have never made art and countless theories.
I would have deleted the game immediately.
So I’m asking you, begging you, please change this for our sakes, and especially for yours.
Because despite all my gripes and anger, and everything I’ve said, I know you guys have actually worked hard on this game because the evidence is there, hidden beneath it all.
I love the actual real life people you have for Adam and Eric, I was so moved to help Adam when he started to cry. I want to know why he knows us and wants our help. I laughed when Eric told us he had tripped, and I do want to get to know him. I even wished to lovingly twist Charlie’s neck! That is the game I remember loving, its writing and characters, I can see the potential here.
But you need to change something, otherwise I cannot support this game, I cannot force myself to play it. I will drop Moonvale.
Give the players a one time payment option for 100% complete access to the game, access to all premium options. That’s the least I feel anyone could ask of you and is biggest reason you are getting this backlash.
To my fellow players, if you agree with any of what I said then I ask you not to pay for anything until Everbyte changes to make their game more affordable. Don’t be quiet and please voice your opinions everywhere they can see it. That’s the only way something could change.
I am so sorry this is what we got… you all deserve better.
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samandcolbyownme · 2 days
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more zach justice smut pleaseeee
As you WISH! I’m excited to write this one!
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Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language/swearing, sneaking around, Bridgerton setting/themed, unprotected sex, kissing, biting, hair pulling, secret sex, almost getting caught, lots of proper language/actions, and lots of fluff and nasty filth
This is inspired by Bridgerton. There will be no spoilers for part 1 of season 3! But, if you have seen the show, you know they’re all british.. so.. read this as if everyone has an accent.
Word Count: 3.5k | not edited
I genuinely thought this song was bridgerton coded for this specifically?? (also, I added this at the end, so instead of daddy it will be mother - when you read, it’ll make sense, hopefully, k love you all bye!)
◦❥•◦❥•◦
You’ve been tossing and turning for hours into the late night.
Your mind bouncing back and forth between Duke Zachary, or as he likes only you to call him, Zach, and the Queen’s ball.
You loved Zach, you’ve come to love him with your full being, you just didn’t know if he knew that, but you didn’t think he was that foolish.
You were named, what the gossip letter in your town - Lady Felicity calls, the Diamond of the season. Mainly because you gained a lot more looks than any of the other girls who are also looking for a suitor along side yourself.
You wanted a husband, of course, but you want Zach to be the one to take your hand in marriage. He’s never said about if he wanted to or not, but you just wanted him so bad you didn’t care what you had to do or say.
You were wrapped around his finger, but he couldn’t deny it no matter how hard he tried - He was wrapped around yours, too.
You rolled over, staring up at the ceiling as you remember the first time you saw him.
- Your mother reaches over, tapping your knee gently, “Y/n, sweetheart.” You remove your stare from the window and place it onto her with a soft smile, “Yes Mother?”
“You look beautiful tonight, darling.” She smiles, placing the edge of her fan to her lips as her eyes grow watery, “oh.” She shakes her head, “I just knew you would be this seasons diamond.”
You shake your head as you look down, “I don’t recall you ever taking a liking to Lady Felicity, now Mother, I-..” The carriage jolts forward and you laugh slightly, “I will find a husband on my own terms. Lady Felicty can speak about whatever they must.”
The door opens and your mother steps out first, followed by your brother and sister, and then you. You look around, nodding your head at the man who helped you step down.
“Alright.” Your mother says as she links her arm with yours, “Come along, my dear. I hear there’s a Duke looking for a lady to wed.” You raise your eyebrows, “A Duke you say? Is he handsome?” You laugh slightly, eyes glancing around at the beautifully decorated ballroom.
“From what I’ve come to know, he is the most beloved suitor by all the young ladies.” Your mother nudges your side, “But just remember, you need to keep your options open.”
You walk up to Queen Darcie and the person closest to her, Lady Caswel. You both do a small curtsy as you bow your heads. “Your Majesty.” Your mother smiles, looking over to Lady Caswel, “Lady Caswel.”
They both nod and then their eyes turn to you. You give them both a smile, “You both look magnificent tonight.”
“Mm.” Queen Darcie nods, “I must say, agreeing with town gossip is not my strongest moment, but you my dear, are the diamond of the season, if I do say so myself.” She points to you and you manage to keep your composure, “Oh my, thank you, your majesty.”
You curtsy to her again and your mother thanks her quickly before walking away with you. You look up at her and you both can’t help but giggle happily as you walk further away. As you rounded the corner, you were bumped into, kind of roughly, by some man walking by.
“Excuse yourself, mister.” You say as you turn, giving him a glaring look, which quickly broke as soon as his eyes met yours, “Please, accept my apologies, um..”
You instantly finish his sentence, “Y/n y/l/n.”
“Please.” He repeats as he moves closer, his hand, his grip just hovering over the skin on your bicep, “My apologies, Miss Y/n.”
His hand moves down to take your hand in his. His lips press against your glove covered knuckles, and even thought his isn’t touching your skin, his touch still sets you on fire.
Giving you a feeling you have never felt for someone before, “Duke Zachary.” —
You let out a sigh before finally giving in to just being awake.
A yawn slips out as you swing your legs over the edge of the bed, reaching forward to grab your satin robe off of the arm of the chair by your bedside stand.
You slip your feet into your matching slippers before standing up. The back of the robe falling to cover the back of your legs as you tie it closed in the front.
You pause, your fingers coming up to cover your lips as your eyes meet the man you shouldn’t be seeing, like this at least.
You glance over your shoulder before you move to unlock your window and push it open. You lean forward, shaking your head as you fight back laughter as you watch the man scale the walls of your home to get to you.
He’s finally face to face with you and you can’t help but smile and lunge in to kiss him.
He wraps an arm around your waist, pushing you backwards as he climbs in and closes the window, “Have you missed me, sweetheart?” He whispers against your lips as his hands move to undo the bow resting on your torso.
“More than you can ever imagine.” You smile as you pull him back to your bed, “We have to be qu-“
He kisses you mid sentence, mumbling a quiet, “I know” before pushing you back to lay on the bed, his body moving up over yours, kissing the skin that isn’t being covered by your robe or nightgown.
“Please.” You beg as you lace your fingers through his hair, “Touch me. It has been far..” His hand drags your nightgown up your thigh.
“Too..” you breathe out as you feel his hand dip between your, now parting thighs, “Long, my darling.”
You lay your hand on his neck, biting down on your lip as your feel his lips press against your skin, his fingers moving to lay on your clit and he looks up at you with a smirk, “Mm, no panties, sweetheart?”
You bite your lip, giving him a shrug, “Couldn’t sleep.”
He licks his lips, parting them as he watches your face twist with pleasure as he starts to slowly rub circles on your clit.
Your nails dig into his neck and you let out a semi loud moan. Zach kisses your parted lips, your panting breathes brushing against his, “Shh.”
He slides two fingers down and pushes them into your soaked cunt, “Did you succeed with pleasuring yourself?”
You whimper as Zach’s question makes a rose colored tint appear a top your cheeks, “N-no.” He tilts his head, “No? Did you do it like I showed you, darling?”
You nod, rolling your hips as you desperately chase your release that’s building up rather quickly, “I-I tried, Zachary.”
He groans at his full first name coming from your lips, “We shall work on it another time, my love.” He leans in, moving his lips with yours and your hands pull him closer to you, whimpering against his lips as his fingers are dragging you over the edge.
He pushes his bicep under your head and curls his arm around to lay his hand over your mouth.
Your walls squeeze his fingers as they work you through your high, his other hand keeping your moans from getting the two of you caught.
That would be a nightmare, people knowing that you have been, as they say, defiled before marriage.
“I have missed this.” Zach whispers, “I have missed you.” He plants a few kisses to your cheek as he withdrawals his fingers from you.
He brings them up to rest upon your bottom lip and they part like they already knew what to do.
He gasps as he watches your lips wrap around them, humming as your tongue works up and down, licking off the taste of yourself, “If anyone knew.. just how devious you truly are..”
He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth as his eyes scan over your face and you smirk, bringing your finger up drag along his jawline, “And just what would they say?”
You hum lowly as your eyes meet his, “Do tell me, my darling.”
He rolls over, pinning your hands down by your head, “I think they would go on a ravenous tangent about how I defiled your pureness and ruined such a beautiful..” he kisses your chest, “young woman.”
He groans into your neck as his tongue drags up your skin, “But they wouldn’t be saying those things if they knew just how radiant you look beneath the touch of my own hand.”
You moan out at his words and his kiss cuts it short. While your lips move in a heated passion, his hand moves down to drag your nightgown up your legs and hold it at your waist while he grinds against you.
Your hand that isn’t still pinned down, moves down to undo the button on his trousers. Zach smirks and shakes his head, “Getting so much quicker at that.”
You smile and slip your hand in, both of you gasping quietly when your hand slides against his cock.
Zach reaches down, laying a hand over yours, “I need to be inside of you.”
You move to take off your panties as quick as you can, all while he’s pushing his trousers down his thighs, “so beautiful.” He leans forward, eyes locked onto yours as your legs fall over your waist.
You feel the tip of his cock rub against your opening and you feel your heart beating faster, “P-please.” You whisper, hips practically moving on their own, begging for the feeling of his cock inside of you.
Zach’s head falls, resting against your forehead as your moans from him sliding into you, mix together, “Oh, my god.” He sighs, shaking his head slightly, “It always feels like I’m taking you for the very first time again.”
You whimper as he crashes his lips onto yours, his hand sliding up to gently wrap around your neck, “I love you.”
You part your lips, adoring those words like you haven’t heard them over and over again.
You’d marry Zach now, but your mother thinks it’s best to give it a little while, make sure you truly feel happy with him, and not just because of his title.
Your mother would turn into an absolute lunatic if she knew just how often you see Duke Zachary and also, what you do with him when no one is watching.
“I love you.” You whisper, nodding up at him as you lay a hand on his cheek, “I love you.”
He pulls you close to him, rolling over onto his back. He grips your hips, getting you to keep moving. He moves the nightgown that fell down to block his view, “You take me so incredibly well, darling.”
You look down at him, biting into your lip to muffle your moans as your hands push his crumpled dress shirt up.
He reaches up, pulling down the low cut neckline so it’s under your breasts. His eyes focus on his hands moving to knead and squeeze, earning whimpers from you.
You gasp loudly and Zach pulls you down onto his chest, his arms wrap around your back before he begins to thrust upward.
You bury your face into his chest, gasping and clawing at his chest as you feel suddenly feel nothing but pleasure radiate all through your body.
It wasn’t long after, Zach’s hips come to a slow stop, his arms loosen around your body and his chest heaves you up and down with each quick breath he takes.
It’s silent, nothing but the faint pants coming from your bodies, which lay motionless together on your bed.
“The Queen’s Ball is tonight.” You say as your eyes glance over at the clock on your nightstand that reads 04:26 AM, “I’m going with Mother in a few hours to fetch my dress from the Modiste.”
You sit up, fixing your nightgown before standing, “Mother thinks I should explore more options.”
Zach furrows his brows, sitting up as soon as the words leave your lips, “Hang on, that doesn’t make any sense, I thought she loved me?”
You laugh slightly, “She does, darling. She does. And I do, too.” You lean down to kiss his lips, “I think the Queen wants to watch the men fall for this seasons diamond.”
“Mm.” Zach nods, pursing his lips, “I’m going to have to put up a harder fight out there, huh?”
You cover your mouth as you giggle, crawling back into his lap, “I think it’s quite..” you scrunch your nose and smirk, “Sexy.”
He straights his posture and smiles, “Well, thank you m’lady.” You laugh and press kisses to his neck. He pulls his neck away and turns his face into hours, “I don’t believe we have time to go again, my love.”
You sigh, still attempting to kiss him, “Are you certain?”
He chuckles quietly and lifts his hand and grabs you by the neck. You gasp at the sudden move and he pushes you back, biting his lip at how much control he has over you, what you and Duke Zachary have is once in a lifetime.
“My mind isn’t going to be able to focus on the Queen’s Ball tonight.” He shakes his head, eyes moving from his hand to your eyes, “Not when I have the imagine of my hand wrapped around this beautiful little throat in there, as well.”
Your breath hitches at his words and he can’t help but smirk, “I’ll see you tonight.” He pulls you in, pecking your lips before moving to fix himself as he walks over to your window.
“Be safe.” You stand up, watching as he climbs out the open window. He looks up at you and gives you a wink, “Always.”
And with that, he’s gone, but you knew you were definitely seeing him way before the Queen’s Ball.
◦❥•◦❥•◦
Your secret romance with Duke Zachary has been going on since the night he ran into you, even after the nights you spent dancing and flirting with other men, mainly just to make your other and the Queen happy.
You and Zach both knew that it didn’t mean anything. You saved everything for him, especially when you got him alone afterwards.
You were certain, as soon as you laid eyes on him, that he was the one, and just like you told Zach, you were the diamond of the season.
You had more suitors coming to your home to try and swoon you in a day than you really thought was unnecessary.
Zach, of course. Showed up everyday and stayed until they all left. He intimidated them, which you couldn’t help but snicker secretly at when you seen the look on the losing suitors face.
You can never bring yourself to ask Zach about it, you just convince yourself that it’ll happen, but it’s almost the end of the season and you haven’t had a ring slipped on your finger yet.
You took a deep breath, smoothing your hands over the fabric of the beautiful dress beneath your bare hands, “Anastasia did a marvelous job.”
You look over at your mother in the mirror, “Don’t you think, mother?”
Your mother looks up, “Oh yes. Yes. I believe she did do a very-“
“What is it?” You cut her off, turning to face her. The housemaid glances up at you and you sigh slightly, trying to compose yourself, “Sorry.”
You look up at your mother and she tilts her head, “The Queen wants you engaged by tonight.”
“Tonight? Why so soon? What has changed, mother?”
She tilts her head, “You are drawing.. too much attention away from the other girls. The Queen thinks it is best you accept one of the engagements you already have extended out to you.
You feel a dull ache in your chest.
The engagements.
You were actually dreading this, but you can only blame yourself in this situation. You were too caught up with sneaking around and lying to everyone around you that you’re forced to pick one of the options given and the one you one isn’t there.
“Talia. Please give my mother and I a moment.” You glance down at your housemaid and she instantly leaves the room.
“I love Duke Zachary, mother.” You shift towards her, moving the loose skirt of your gown with your hands, “He loves me. I know he’ll propose, I just..”
“He’s..” she steps close, leaning in, “Your brother told me that he’s what they call.. a rake.. I believe.”
You shake your head, “If Duke Zachary spent his time at that underground drunken gambling ring, he would know about the three engagement offers.”
Your mother raises her brows, “And you know this how, sweetheart?”
“He would have spoken to me about it, of course.” You swallow, “On our afternoon walks, he would have asked me what I was going to do because he is still an eligible suitor to me, mother.”
She nods, “Very well then.” She takes a deep breathe, “If Duke Zachary does not propose before midnight tonight. You will accept another suitors proposal. Right.”
“No.” You shake your head, “I won’t, mother. You cannot make me marry someone I do not love and I promise you I will not love anyone like I love Zachary.”
You step down off of the platform, “I will marry him. I will have him children.”
Your mother’s eyes grow wide and she lays a hand on her chest, “Have yo-
You bite down on your lip, “I’m not, but you should see your face.” You raise your brows, laughing at the fact that Zach has rubbed off on you in more ways that. One.
Your mother scoffs, “Y/n. You will not disgrace the name of this family by not obeying the queens order. You will be engaged by to-“
“I’ll tell you something right now, mother. I would rather burn my whole life down than to do something that will not bring me joy for the rest of my life.”
She stares at you for a few moments, “Is there a reason he hasn’t proposed yet, darling? Has that thought crossed your thoughts at all?”
You shake your head, “Have you not heard the rumors? What lady Felicity has said about Duke Zachary and I?” You walk over, ”He is poetry, and I am his poet.. Please, mother. Give him time.”
She shakes her head, “We must do what the Queen has asked of us.”
You take a few steps back, bunching up your dress as you shake your head, “No.” You run towards the door, dress unbuttoned and ruffling behind you as you run down the hall.
Your mother running out the door after you, “No! Y/n, come back here!”
“Mother no.” Your eldest brother grabs her and holds her back.
You make your way out the front doors, a small crowd following you, unsure of what’s happening, they’re just trying to ensure your safety.
“Y/n!”
You freeze, tear soaked face looking up at Zach, “Zach?” You whisper, barely audible, “What.. what are-“
You stop walking when Zach drops down to one knee, “Y/n..” he starts, reaching out for your hands, “My love.”
You walk up to him immediately, placing your hands into his, not even bothering to wipe away your tears.
“I love you. The other day you asked me why I love you and I told you the truth. You feel like home to me. You have bewitched me. Your mind, your body. Your soul. You complex me in the best ways and I just have this fire within me that only your kiss can put out.” He pulls you down to his level and you sit on your knees, hands moving to cup his cheeks as his do the same to you.
“The most beautiful part about all of this, is that I wasn’t even looking when I found you. If you hadn’t snapped at me for bumping into you, I would have kept moving right along.”
You laugh slightly and sniffle. Zach wipes away your tears and looks into your eyes, “Will you choose me to be the one to spend the rest of your life with?”
“You know about the other engagements?” You squint your eyes and Zach nods, “Well, when you’re running down the street trying to get to you while listening to your sister scream that you need to be engaged by tonight, I got the rest myself.”
“My sis-“ you look over at your sister and she smiles, giving you a small wave. You laugh, “Unbelievable.” You look at Zach, “So what are you asking Duke Zachary?”
He smiles, “I believe, I’m asking if you will do me the honor in marrying me, Miss Y/n.”
He pulls out a ring from his suit pocket and you gasp, “Oh my gosh.” You look up at him, nodding, “Yes, over and over. Yes.”
You pull him in for a kiss and everyone around you cheers as he brings you to your feet, slipping the ring in before he lifts you up, lips on yours as he spins you around, “I love you.”
“I love you.”
◦❥•◦❥•◦
Let me know what you thought of this! As always, I love you all and thank you for reading!! 🖤🖤
Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!!
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66sharkteeth · 2 days
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Weekly thoughts Ep 173-
Well i said last week that I'd definitely have more thoughts this week, but here I am again, kind of just empty headed as I start this. I was actually pretty excited for this episode, just because it's the first time we see Jericho undeniably as the villain, as well as his scion's first canon lines technically.
But I dunno, feedback lately is kind of killing my enthusiasm. I know the majority of readers are still enjoying the comic, but it's exhausting to see the negative comments increase, ranging from people just being disappointingly moronic about there being LGBT themes in the story, to people telling me the story is going down hill. To which... I'm sorry! But! How?! Like I'm trying to wrap my brain around it. I'm not immune to criticism, there are plenty of points in the story that I agree were not the best writing, but this is not one of them. I've seen comments ranging from "not enough is happening" to "things are only happening for the sake of conflict" and both of those points baffle me. How is everything that's transpired in the past 10 episodes alone nothing? Sorry, do I have to kill off ALL of the cast for it to be "something"? And as for conflict only happening for the sake of conflict???? I literally don't know how to respond to that. Conflict is how a story progresses. Should Rex and Jericho just have...hugged it out?? Should Jericho just have been like "Actually, you know what Claude, I think I do just need therapy. This world domination thing was a bad idea." Should Rex have, back when everyone was betraying him and joined the bad guys, been like "Actually, the systemic treatment of me is fair. I guess I'm just gonna go to jail now instead of going into hiding with these guys. See ya!"
I dunno. I've been SO sad and down the past two weeks, but typing this out I've progressed to angry haha. Mad at homophobes and media illiteracy taking away the pleasure I get from sharing this comic. In a venty way, to be clear. I definitely don't think I'll post this one anywhere else because I can see people saying I don't take criticism or something, but man. No. I can and I have. But the points made this week would make for a flat out bad and BORING story. And I'm so mad people just want my story to be so BORING because they just don't like facing negative emotions in a story. There will be a light at the end of the tunnel of this story eventually, but we're just in the tunnel currently. I'm not gonna hurry up the tour for everyone else just because you're afraid of the dark.
Raugh ok, I guess this wasn't actually much about the actual episode, was it? Ironic that the big villain monologue episode is where I finally kind of lose it and monologue myself. I guess for the sake of actually commenting on the ep...
Yes, I had lots of fun drawing this ep. I've been waiting a long time to have Jericho's scion finally "speak." There's also a lot of cracks showing in Claude that I'm glad people are taking note of. I've said it before, but Claude's development has been some of my favorite to write in the entire story, and we're still in his arc. Excited for things coming up for him.
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mariaace · 18 hours
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100 followers event + collab with @transmascaraa
(cuddling headcanons-PM+Hunting Dogs)
A/n:sooo hello guys I've reached 100 followersss and my bf had reached 400, so we decided to make this collab as an event for them💜 Those are basically some cuddling headcanons. I am writing for the port mafia and the hunting dogs. Nyx is writing for ADA and DoA. You can find his work right here.
P.S. I am so thankful to all of you for 100 followers it really means a lot to me<33
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Port Mafia
Chuuya
Cuddles with this man are rather rare ngl. He's busy with his job and everything, buuuut he always makes up for it
He is so gentle with you and careful with how he touches you. This man is a gentleman, you can't expect anything else
He refuses to be the little spoon. Like no chance. He feels like he can protect you more that way even if it's just cuddles.
Most of time, when his head is in your lap, he would expect you to play with his hair. (Maybe would get offended when you don't 😅)
Hug his waist pleasee!! You can't cuddle with that man and don't wrap your hands around that waist. He will also love it<3
Akutagawa
Now with this you've really gotta work to get to cuddling lmao. This is the most unaffectionate person from bsd maybe.
Bue still when you do get to it he would be sooo akward for him at first, but he will get used to it..maybe...after a lot of time...
Still cuddles would be like, with him literally crushing you while just laying on top of you, but still he is underweight so you won't feel it a lot
Probably would feel asleep, but would not admit it after that
He always acts like he hates when you ask him for cuddles, but (very) deep down he actually loves it, because it calms him down and his thoughts.
Tachihara
This boy is soo underrated please
Anyways that wasn't the theme. Cuddling with Tachihara is an often thing
He loves to cuddle and be touchy with you. So almost every day after work, he'll just drop his body weight on top of you lmao
In this case tho, he would want to play with your hair. "It calms me down!!" He always says- and maybe it does, after a long day at work
Hand holding while cuddling is something soo important for him. Like he loves holding your hand and because he can't do it more often he insists on doing it while cuddling
Gin
Ohhhhh now this sweet.. powerful... gorgeous woman. I need a Gin in my life
Anyways cuddling with her would be you two facing eachother, laying in the bed, with your legs interlocked and her arm around you
She would like for you to tell her how your day has been while you play with her hair. She might fall asleep tho
After that she will tel you about her day and would be like turning around and gesturing with her hands while talking, so you get to pull her back to cuddling
Cuddles before going to bed are her favourite, because then you both fall asleep in each other's arms
The Hunting Dogs
Tecchou
Ehh >< sweet guy i i love him so much.
He is the big spoon. Always. Like most of them, he needs to have the assurance that he can protect you immediately if something happens.
Doesn't talk much while you cuddle. He would just close his eyes and burry his face in the crook of your neck
Would most likely to ask you to talk though, because he loves listening to your voice, so don't blame him if he falls asleep, but this doesn't happen very often
Also he doesn't move around when you two are laying down. Like he'll get in one position and not move until he actually has to get up to go to work
Jouno
Omg i have already talk about that before but anyway
So like I've said in my Jouno headcanons, i think he has sensory issues, because of the fact that he is blind and is very sensitive towards any kind of physical affection
So in that case cuddles wouldn't happen often, because he gets easily overwhelmed by them
However on days he is very tired or you had a bad day/are also tired, he would. You have to be careful with him though
He likes cuddling with you in general, just pls be careful with him
Teruko
She would pop onto you like a starfish
Would start ramble, ramble, ramble..until zhe actually falls asleep in your arms
Honestly in order for you to cuddle either one you is veeery tired or you were playfully fighting or tickling eachother, then it turned into cuddles
Her rambles are soo cute. Like she would tell you every single thing about her day, to the smallest detail
Like i said, she would probably fall asleep after that AND would expect you to hug her tight while she is sleeping
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© mariaace 2024 please do not copy, translate, steal or claim any of my works!
Reblogs are highly appreciated!
@dazailoveschuuya @transmascaraa
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wonton4rang · 2 days
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SOO, in this period I have developed a huge obsession for Sungho from bnd, seeing those broad shoulders every single day makes me think about how much his physique is suitable for that of a swimmer. Sooooo, could you write something about pool sex with sungho? Thanks in advance if you do, love ya🫶🏻
oh my god you're soooo me (and i love u too<3) 😭😭😭 lately leehan and sungho have been making me go crazyyyy. they are so hot and for wHAT.
this is long, i think the longest post I've made so far but i just got carried away, sungho is such a writeable person, specially when we include his shoulders/ back and pool sex??? i hope y'all enjoy !! If you see any typos, no, you didn't 🙏
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summer was the worst season for you, it was hot, sticky and it forced you to wash your hair EVERY SINGLE DAY, and honestly that's a hustle. so you simply hated when summer came, yeah, that until you noticed that you could have a win win by going to swim class, you wouldn't be hot (due to the weather tho), you will learn how to swim and you will also get to see the hottest boy in town: park sungho.
you just couldn't wrap your mind on how he looked so good, perfect skin, beautiful foxy eyes, a tender smile and an amazing and lovely, kind, cute personality. he was basically perfect. but the day you saw him swimming??? that was the day you felt you were doing it all wrong, how come you had such a hot man close by and never noticed? he has those broad and toned shoulders, his muscles tensing when he swam through the pool and then had to flex his arms to pull himself out of it in the edge.
you felt how your throat went dry and your hands started to shake when he walked your way.
"you must be y/n?" he asked softly, removing his swimming hat and launching his perfect hair, because yes, he also had perfect hair.
"yes, i am here for the classes?" sungho just nodded, getting to your side before looking up and down at you and lifting an eyebrow.
"you can change in there" he signalled a door behind you "today is just gonna be us since the other two said they couldn't make it"
you just nodded in comprehension, walking to the place he told you about and changing into your swimming suit, noticing how you forgot about your swimming hat, you suddenly felt so nervous and you couldn't telk why. well, i can tell you why, your pussy was literally wetter than the pool out there, it took sungho 2 minutes to make you want him so bad you'll beg for it.
once you went out, you couldn't even think about swimming, you were NOT listening to a single word he said, your eyes were fixed in his lips yet you did not understand a word, but when you felt his hands in your waist, his face so close to yours when you lifted your head, you just couldn't hold it back and shamelessly licked your lips, getting a tilted head from him before he kinda laughed at your action and made you put your feet in the bottom of the pool.
"is there something you wanna tell me, y/n? you are definitely not paying attention. maybe something you want to know so we can continue?"
"are you dating someone?" he definitely expected that.
"no, i am-"
"i need you, please" he gapped his mouth a few times before actually freezing in front of you, his hands on your hips and his eyes scanning your face for almost a minute before he said:
"like, here and now?" you nodded to his words and he just thought about it for a second before nodding too and trying to get out of the pool, you held his hand and stopped him.
"i want to do it here" but sungho was just as compliant as he seemed to be so he just said yes and finally took you in for a kiss. don't get him wrong, it's not that he's an 'easy' person but when he was so stressed with the upcoming competition and in top of that had to give classes because his dad asked him to do so (the local pool was theirs) he just needed a way to escape that, and you looked just like the perfect match for his preferences.
so it was perfect for him when you came forward first because tbh he didn't know how to approach you without making you feel uncomfortable if you didn't feel the same as he did. and this was actually such a new experience for him, fucking with someone on a random day, place and without having any ties to that person previously to doing it? that's straight up crazy for him.
but here he was, kissing you like his life depends on it, he was needy, he was seeking for this and now that he had it he just took it. his tongue ghosted your lips and his body pressed against yours with some strength that made you open your eyes when your back hit the edge of the pool, your hands went automatically to his shoulders, pressing down in the flesh, feeling it under your fingertips and moaning softly at the feeling and the warm yet chilly temperature of his skin.
he left your lips for a moment, going for your neck with hot and open mouthed kisses that gave you this weird feeling of emptiness and made you so needy for him when his arms went to each side of your head, pressing agaisnt the edge of the pool and his lips going down to your collarbones when your hands held him for below his arms, positioning in his wide back and making him get closer and closer to you to the point that he groaned himself, making you feel the vibrations in your skin before one of your hands took the hair in his nape and pulled him back a little.
his lips looked swollen and his eyes kinda watery when he faced you and took one of his hands to cup your face and kiss you softly "i need you, please" he nodded at your words, kissing you one more time cause he personally just loved the whole kissing stuff like a mad man.
"do you have any condoms?" he asked you really close to your lips, not really wanting to leave them.
"i... i actually do" you mouthered and he tried to get away from you so he could look for them, it's not that you always had condoms in your bag, even though you should just in case, but you really knew what you came here for so... but even before he got 5 inches away from you your hands were already pulling him back "do you mind doing it without it? i'm good" you explained, so he could know that there were no diseases in your system.
"i don't mind but are you sure? the water can cause some friction and i wouldn't want you to-" he took his bottom lip between his teeth and then proceeded "you know, i want you to enjoy it too"
"it's okay, i just want to feel you" he laughed at what you said because you could feel him with a condom too but he won't discuss that now that he felt his boner pushing his swimming pants and urging for a release. he nodded and took you in for a kiss again, his hand lowering in your body until he reached your pussy, palming a little and causing a spasm to run through your body, taking the chance to finally introduce his tongue in your mouth and kiss you deeper.
he didn't loose any time when his fingers made your swimsuit aside and he entered his middle finger in your cunt, your hands pressing in his back and your legs opened up for him to position himself in between them, his lips finally parted ways with yours, his forehead pressing against yours while he slowly humped you with his finger inside of you and his hips right behind. "i wish i could eat you out so bad right now" he whispered, audibly moaning like a little bitch when you gave him a short kiss in the lips and held the back of his head to play with his hair.
his eyes staring into yours with so much hunger that you just couldn't make it longer, you needed him to fuck you so bad, his frame covering yours and making your legs feel weak before saying "please, get in, sungho" and he did not thought about it twice, lowering his pants with one hand and keeping your swimsuit away with the other when he pressed the tip in your cunt, it felt so warm in comparison to the cold water surrounding you.
you felt him pushing pass your entrance and your arms wrapped around his shoulders for support, one of his hands going to hold your waist when he finally looked back up at your eyes, managing to unglue them from what he could see through the water of your pussy taking his dick.
"all good?" he asked as he slowly went deeper and deeper in your cunt, you felt the stretch and just when you thought it was all in, he kept pushing, causing you to groan out in desperation. you needed him to thrust into you and finally relieve your clenching pussy.
"all good, you can move" he nodded and finally slammed his hips against yours, the movement being rather slow due to the water but it felt so good that your pussy pulsated when he came forward one more time, this time stronger and groaning in your ear when he tried to muffle his moans by kissing the space between your neck and your ear, and as much as you liked it and felt like you could die right now and die happy with his dick buried deep in your cunt, both of his hands were now holding your hips while his fingers pressed with some strength there, you pulled away from his lips, his thrusts coming to a stop because he got a little bit confused at your actions.
"did i hurt you?" you could feel his grab loosening and quickly denied with your head.
"you're perfect, but i want to... you know, hear you" his eyebrows lifted at that, his cheeks blushing when he swallowed at your words "you sound so pretty when you're on it, please" sungho was just a big boy physically and mentally, but when you shared how you felt his dick literally twitched inside of you and he immediately resumed his thrusts, this time going deeper than before if that was even possible and he finally picked up a pace that made you grin a little bit out of pleasure.
he was so good for you, so good for your needs, so good to make you want more and more. but when he started moaning sweetly in your ear you lost it, you became a little bit more vocal too, both of your whines mixing together and resonating in the four walls of the roofted pool due to the echo in there.
he fucked you fast yet precisely, slamming his hips over and over again in that spot that made you cry out and clench your cunt around his already leaking cock. he was so into it that he almost forgot to keep his voice down, whining so softly in your ear before asking:
"are you feeling good?" you desperately nodded, letting a high pitched moan when he gave you a sharp thrust, your eyes were wide open while you looked at him, your hair coming in the way when he started fucking you like that, strong and sharped, making you jump a little bit but keeping you safe in his arms when he hugged your waist instead of holding your hips, you moaned before he removed the wet hair from your face and kissed your lips.
"you look so pretty, and you feel so good" he moaned against your lips, his right hand going down to play with your clit, causing you to spasm and grind down on his dick and hand.
"you feel so good too" was all you could manage to say before pressing your nails in his back, his shoulders aching a bit when you scratched him by mistake. and even though he was not into having those marks on him, it felt so hot in the moment that he might need to think about it twice. "i'm so close, so so close" your voice sounded wasted, cracking a little bit with each thrust he gave up into you. "please keep going, just a little more" but sungho was not that strong, he was not that good at holding himself back, specially not with your pretty voice saying those things to him, not with your arms holding him so close to your frame, not with your soaked cunt squeezing his dick and his desperation showing up. he couldn't, so he tried to pull out before he came, first because he wasn't coming inside of you without your consent and second because he wanted to make you come first.
but his ideas shattered when your arms did not allowed him to pull out, your head desperately denying before saying "please come inside, i need to come with you, please" it took him literally 8 seconds and almost 10 thrusts to come after that, the feeling of his warm dick softening inside of your while he rode his orgasm out making you come in his hand and around his cock. "goddam it" you whispered, your hands falling from his arms and resting on his waist, throwing your head behind while he was hiding his face in your neck, slowly kissing your chest while you both came down from your high and regulated your breath.
it didn't take him 2 seconds to kiss your lips when you looked at him afterwards, accepting the sweet kiss the boy was giving you and moaning at the feeling of his dick leaving your pussy, the emptiness coming back while your cunt clenched around nothing.
"how are you feeling?" he asked you softly, fixing your swimsuit and cupping your face with his right hand while his foxy eyes looked at yours.
"that was amazing, i had a while needing something like that" you laughed and he did too.
"that makes two of us" he reassured and then spoke again "are you taking pills or do you need me to get you something?"
"i'm okay, no worries, i got it" after that y'all just came out of the pool, not really into class anymore and tbh who would be? you went to change back to your regular clothes and you just know he followed you behind and went in the changing room with you.
that's how you both ended up making out, again, and how you took his number to hit him up if you ever needed anothed lesson. it really didn't have to be a swimming one tho.
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Even More DBD as Incorrect Quotes from a Random Generator
Charles: So like, how far do you think the distance is from that window to the ground? Edwin: Enough.
Crystal: I never said I was gonna get back together with them. But I was thinking, they're in town, would it be the worst thing in the world if I gave them a call? Jenny: No. No, Crystal, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. It would be the fourth worst thing. Number one: a super volcano. Number two: an asteroid hits the Earth. Number three: All the Evel Knievel movies are lost. Number four: Person F calls Person C. Number five: Niko gets eaten by a shark. Niko: I’m Niko, and I approve the order of that list.
Charles: Some people are like slinkies. Edwin: What? Charles: Not really good for much but bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs. Edwin: Edwin: Please don't push the Cat King down the stairs. Charles, pushing the Cat King down the stairs: Too late.
Crystal: If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're impressed. Edwin: But you do know better.
Edwin: Ew. What kind of tea is this? Charles: I boiled gatorade.
Niko: Are you mad? Jenny: No. Niko: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?
Charles: What the fuck is with english teachers and being like; "write a story about a deep and personal memory that impacted your life". Ma'am, if I do that you're going to send me to the counselor's office.
Crystal and Charles: Isn't it amazing how I can feel so bad and still look so good?
Charles: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I’ll wait. Edwin: You and me. Charles: *tearing up* Ok.
Crystal: Hey, can I get a sip of that water? Esther: It’s not water. Crystal: Vodka! I like your sty- Esther: It’s vinegar. Crystal: …What? Esther: It's vinegar, PUSSY.
Charles: Underestimate me. That'll be fun.
Edwin: Welcome to Fucking Applebees, do you want apples or bees? Crystal: Bees? Edwin: THEY HAVE SELECTED THE BEES! Crystal: Wait- *Charles approaches, shaking a jar of bees menacingly*
Jenny: What’s something you guys are better than Edwin at? Crystal: Mario Kart. Charles: Yeah, video games. Niko: Emotional vulnerability.
Charles: So apparently the "bad vibes" I've been feeling are actually "Severe psychological distress."
Charles: You're a lying piece of shit! Crystal: Oh yeah? You're the idiot that thinks you can get away with everything you do, WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! Edwin: I'm leaving and I'm taking Niko with me! Jenny, gathering cards: Aaaaand that's enough Monopoly for today.
Charles: If you were to have sex with any insect scaled up to human size, what would it be? Jenny: What the hell is wrong with you?
Charles, about Edwin: I would never say that my partner is a bitch and I don’t don’t like them. That’s not true… My partner is a bitch and I like them so much!
Esther: *writing a letter* Esther: Dear Santa, I'm writing to let you know I've been naughty... And it was worth it you fat, judgemental bastard.
Charles: How do those little boys on XBOX parties always know what slur to call you? Crystal: They're empaths.
Charles: Mama. Just killed a man. Charles: Put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger now he's dead. Charles: MAMAAAAAAAA OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Edwin: What?! Let me hide the body, where is it? Is there anyone around that can hear us? Edwin: ...Are those song lyrics? Charles: Those are song lyrics.
Crystal: What’s the straightest thing you’ve ever done? Edwin: *sighs* Edwin: I killed a man.
Edwin: Unfortunately, due to several experiences in my youth, I cannot just 'walk up and join a circle of people talking', but it does sound lovely, thank you.
Edwin: What's this? Charles, hugging Edwin: Affection! Edwin: Disgusting. Edwin: ...Do it again.
Edwin: If you've ever had a crush on me, god bless your poor, misguided heart.
Crystal: I'm gonna need a human skull but you can't ask why. Edwin: Only if you also don't ask why. Edwin: *pulls four pristine human skulls out of their bag* Crystal: ... Crystal, grabbing a skull: This one will do.
Niko: Source? Crystal: Divine intuition.
Crystal: Made you all playlists! Crystal: Jenny, yours has only heavy metal, and is dark like your soul. Crystal: Edwin, yours has sad songs and blues to pair with your crippling depression. Crystal: And Niko has the ABBA Gold album.
Charles, to Niko: You know, the Cat King can be really aggressive, so it's important to take all the necessary precautions when approaching. Charles: *blows airhorn at the Cat King* GET FUCKED!
Niko: Croissants: dropped Charles: Road: works ahead Crystal: BBQ sauce: on my titties Monty: Shavacado: fre Jenny: Miss Keisha: fuckin dead Edwin: Edwin: ...I didn’t understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.
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xxspringmelodyxx · 21 hours
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Missing you~
Childe x reader
Childe had been on a long mission with Lumine, and you and him desperately missed each other. He finished the mission and was returning home very late as a surprise for you the next morning. After you went to bed, Childe came inside the house and cuddled right up to you in bed, which you will see the next morning.
A/n: I needed to write something sweet and simple because my heart is already suffering from angst…but I kinda like it???? Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this short, but cute, little session with the amazing fatui harbinger~ slight suggestiveness at the end so MDNI!!
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I woke up, slowly opening my eyes as the sun's rays hit my face. I stretched a bit, getting myself ready to get out of bed when all of a sudden, I heard light snoring.
A small smile formed on my face as I turned my head to see orange locks covering a sleepy man’s face. I carefully slid towards him, trying not to wake him, and kissed his forehead. I was happy he was back home and safe. It had been roughly three weeks since you two had seen or heard from each other. Childe was on an important commission with Lumine. You were all for it, but a part of you was extremely worried for him. You trusted Lumine to keep him safe, but you still had your doubts. Nevertheless, here your loving boyfriend was, sleeping softly and soundly. You stared at him, debating if you should wake him up or not. You wanted to kiss him all over and snuggle with him right then and there…but you also knew that he was probably extremely tired. Your fingers delicately traced his new scars that formed, hating those marks being there. He hummed a bit, still sound asleep. As much as you wanted to talk with him, you decided to let him rest. You two have all day to spend time together, so it’s best if he gets his sleep.
You turned back around, thinking to yourself. Within a second, a wonderful idea popped into your head. You were going to make some breakfast for him. Childe always talks about how amazing your cooking is and how he can’t wait to eat it when he gets back home. So why not make something for him now?
You smiled as a new excitement hit you, making you start to move to get out of the bed. However, just as you sat up to leave, a muscular arm wrapped around your body and pulled you back into bed. A small squeak left your mouth as Childe’s arm held onto you tightly. He cuddled you right into his chest as he inhaled your scent.
“Don’t go…” he mumbled, still half asleep.
You chuckled as he nuzzled into you.
“Childe, let me go. I wanna go make you breakfast.”
He smiled as he heard your voice for the first time in forever, making his heart skip.
“You can make me breakfast later. Right now, all I want is you~” he said, pulling you closer to him. You felt heat rise to your face, but pushed him away anyways.
“As much as I like to hear that, you still need to eat. Especially after a long trip like the one you just came back from. Now I’m gonna go make you some food, and you wait here.” You said, getting up again, only to find yourself failing. Childe’s arm reached out for you once again and once he made contact, he threw you back into the bed and pinned your arms to the sides of your head. He was now on top of you, smiling down at you.
“I told you, love, that I don’t want breakfast…I want you~” he said, going down to kiss your lips. You instantly broke in and kissed back immediately. You missed his kisses so much, and he missed yours. He missed your beautiful face, your beautiful smile, your voice, your touch, everything. While he was on his trip with Lumine, Lumine almost made him go back because he wouldn’t shut up about you.
He smiled as he finally felt you again. He let go of the kiss and kissed your temples, then your forehead, then your cheeks, and finally your nose. This made you break into a fit of giggles as he did that over and over again.
“I. Missed you. So. Much.” He said between kisses, letting go of your wrists. You smiled and wrapped them around his neck, pulling him in for another kiss.
“Mmm, I missed you more~” you replied back.
“You have no idea how lonely I was while fighting. It was horrible.” He complained, making you smile. He laid down on your chest, listening to your heartbeat. You played with his hair as he continued to complain about how awful this mission was.
“Y/n, next time, promise me that you’ll go with me. That way we won’t be lonely and we can fight together!” He said with a sparkle in his eyes. You chuckled, bringing his face up to you so you could kiss his nose.
“I’ll think about it.” You said, teasing him.
“Y/n~ it will be so boring without you. I can’t possibly imagine going out on another mission without you. Please?” He begged. You rolled your eyes as he started to give you his puppy dog eyes.
When you weren’t speaking, a thought came to his head. A sly smirk crawled to his face as he instantly pinned you to the bed again. He kissed you with much more force and passion. He licked your bottom lip and forced his tongue inside your mouth. A small moan slipped from you, and that made Childe smirk into the kiss. He let go of on of your wrist to touch the rest of your body. His cool fingers sent shivers up your spine, and goosebumps all over your skin. He softly touched your neck, your shoulders, your chest, all the way down to your stomach and your thighs.
He then abruptly stopped and looked down at your flushed face and swollen lips.
“I absolutely love seeing you like this, darling.” He spoke, kissing you softly this time.
“Now will you promise to come with me on my next mission? I promise there will be much more of this and then some if you do~” He asked, making you smile up at him. You giggled as you pushed him away
“Fine, fine. I’ll go with you on your next mission.” You said, making his smile widen.
“Thank you! I promise it will be a fun one!” He said, hugging you.
After that, he laid on his back and laid your head down on his chest, making it your turn to hear his heartbeat. It was so relaxing and calm, as if hearing it made all your worries come to an end. You snuggled up to him and held him close, just as he was holding you close to him. You two ended up staying in bed for a good two hours after that, just enjoying each other’s company and being in each other’s arms. After that, you made him and yourself breakfast like you said, and then spent the rest of the day together in your shared home. And yes, things did get a little…Spicy in the middle of the day and at the end of the night~ do with that what you will my lovelies~
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Hold me tighter
A/n: For this one, I did two requests (both being about comfort). I know I've been very inactive but I felt like writing :) BYE I STARTED WRITING THIS LIKE A MONTH OR TWO AGO I FINISHED THIS AT 1 AM SO DONT MIND THE SPELLING AND WRITING. PLEASE.
You're burnt out and need comfort :))
Y/n pov:
It was a Thursday night, I was coming back from work with so many emails to read and answer as a former assistant and so many essays to write as a student. Thursday was always the busiest day. The teachers would give more work so that students work hard even on the weekends and for some reason, customers reach out way more at the end of the week. I just wanted one day where I could be free. One day where I could just lay in bed holding my girlfriend all day. I couldn't even remember the last time we shared a meal. We were both very busy but it shouldn't keep us away like this. But truly, I shouldn't complain because it's simply my job.
Unfortunately, this day is only possible once I get my degree and once I can take days off again. I've always had issues with my stomach. Sometimes it would randomly start hurting. I've always been told "It's just stress" but it's still a pain in the ass to feel like you're being stabbed with every move you do and because of that, it leads to me having no more days off. I dreamt of the day I'd finally have an answer to how I can stop these cramps but it never arrived. So I would just miss an average of one day every week because I had difficulties even getting up. After that, there were also my horrible migraines that happened every two days. It was a living hell.
When I finally arrived home, I broke. I didn't think it would happen but it did. I sat in the corner of the kitchen crying for an hour until Billie arrived. I could see the shock on her face when she opened the door that led towards the kitchen and saw me curled up in a corner. I had never broken down in front of her. My immediate reaction was to try to stop crying but I couldn't. My vision was only getting blurrier from the stress of being this vulnerable with someone I love. I tried to explain myself from fear but nothing other than broken sobs came out of my throat.
"No need to talk sweetheart. I know." She whispered as she was kneeling to be at my height.
3rd pov:
Growing up in a place where you would get screamed after if you cried as someone sensitive had negative consequences on how you act and your trust towards the people you loved the most. One of those consequences being to push away some of your loved ones when they are just trying to help. But Billie knew that. She slowly got closer, with no physical touch at all, waiting for a signal that could indicate that you were comfortable with her getting closer. As time went by, she inched closer and closer, taking your hand in hers at a certain point which helped you calm down until you were calm enough and comfortable enough for her to be holding you. You stayed sitting on the floor in each other's arms for a little while just enjoying the comfort.
"Y/n?" Billie said softly, breaking the silence.
You only nodded, not finding the strength to even talk.
"Let's get you in bed okay? You're overworked baby and it kills me that you don't realize it. Gosh, can't stand seeing you this tired..." She said, this time with a more concerned tone in her voice.
She helped you get up, pulling you towards the bed. Once you got in, she joined spooning you.
"Are you comfortable..?" She whispered making sure you felt as good as possible.
"I'm so fucking sorry." You let out. "I feel like a burden Billie! I'm always the one who's late, the one finishing essays at crazy hours, I'm never there!" You exclaim, tears pricking at your eyes again, threatening to fall down on your cheeks.
"I'm holding you back Billie." You said, quietly this time.
"You know that's not true..." She answered. Her arms wrapped around your waist, holding you closer and tighter. "I love you y/n. More than anything. And if staying with you means waiting for you to finish university and get your degree then I will because I truly do love you. How about we talk about this tomorrow? I know you're tired." All you could do was let out a soft hum before falling asleep in her arms. Your girlfriend's arms. Holding you tighter and tighter than she ever did every single time.
A/n that's fucking crazy it is 12:50 am and I am tired and this ending is probably fucked
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gallavichsreddie1128 · 24 hours
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Jealousy looks hot on you (Hannibal)
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Description: Hannibal gets jealous after Mason flirts with Y/N.
Warning: Smut
Word Count:939
Request:
Hi,
I absolutely love your one shots/writing style! ❤️
Could you please write a fanfic where the reader is Hannibal‘s secretary and he get‘s jealous after seeing a patient ( bonus point if it‘s mason or franklyn) flirting with her. He has a talk with her ( with smut in the end if possible) and starts confessing. Thank you for considering
Hi,
could you write a jealous Hannibal with a secretary reader? Mason or Franklyn started flirting with the reader and she seemed flattered (to Hannibal), which is why he get‘s jealous (they are not in a realtionship yet). He at first just wants to talk about it, but then snaps (smut in the end?).
Author’s note: I combined two requests for this one. Also thank you so much anon!!! I’m working on a Patrick Zweig request for tomorrow. Send in requests!
Being Hannibal’s Secretary was a blessing and a curse. It was a blessing because Hannibal was a great lover. Oh and the man cooks! The curse was the unprofessional work relationships and the jealousy. Hannibal would need to get work done and instead by fucking Y/N on the desk minutes before a patient of his was suppose to be there.
His jealousy was unhealthy, they weren’t even together and yet he acts like they are. Y/N thinks that it’s just sex but Hannibal was in love with her. How could he not be? Y/N has been there for him through everything and even in the situation right now with Mason, she was here. Mason was odd to say the least. He definitely wasn’t okay in the head and he was about to be more fucked after Hannibal got him alone. Hannibal glared as he talked with Y/N. Well to Hannibal it was flirting and oh did Y/N look into it.
Mason was a rat and even looked like one too. How the fuck was Y/N okay with this? He watched as Y/N laughed at whatever Mason said. He wasn’t a funny guy, he was a creep. Hannibal bit his lip as he thought of a hundred different ways to kill the man. The smile Y/N had didn’t reach her all the way but reached enough to make Hannibal mad. What pushed him over the edge was when Mason reached out to touch her. Within seconds Mason was pinned to the wall. Hannibal was breathing heavy and his grip on Mason was tight. Mason didn’t look freaked out and had a smirk. “Hannibal, what the fuck?” Y/N asked.
He looked back at her and saw her scared expression. He let go of Mason and turned to her. “I need to talk to you.” He tells her. She looked at Mason and back at him. “Apologize to him first.” She said softly. He wanted to roll his eyes but fought against it. She really had no idea what kind of monster he was. “I’m sorry Mason.” He said but his voice gave no emotion. “I’m thinking that could have sounded more sincere.” Mason says but Hannibal pulls Y/N away. 
“You can’t be with him Y/N.” Was the first words that left his mouth once they were outside Mason’s house. She looked at him confused. “What?” She asked. “He’s not a good guy. You deserve better. He’s crazy and I-“ “Jeez Hannibal I’m not into Mason.” She exclaimed. He nodded and gave her a smile. “Very well then. We should get back to my office.” He said and she nodded and walked to the car. 
After a few drinks in his office the two were stripped off their clothes with Y/N in Hannibal’s lap as they made out in his chair. His hands moved up and down her back as her hands were placed on his shoulders so she could deepen the kiss. They barely pulled away to breathe. His hands went down to her ass and squeezed causing her to moan in his mouth.
He slipped his tongue in her mouth as they sloppily kissed. “Hannibal.” She pulled away from the kiss. “What?” He asked huskily as he ran a hand through her hair. “Why did you care that Mason was flirting with me?” “He’s a bad man Y/N.” “No Hannibal there’s more that you aren’t saying.” He looks down, his hand dropping. “I uh-“ she kisses him softly. “Tell me.” “I’m in love with you Y/N.” He tells her and cups her face. She looks at him and kisses him hard. “Take me to your bed Hannibal.” She said against his lips. 
She looks down at him as she slowly slides down on his dick. It wasn’t the first time but it was the first time that it was out of love. He looked back up at her and his brows furrowed a little as she took him in. She let out a shutter breath as she took him in fully. “You’re so beautiful.” He tells her as he places his hands on her hips. She sighs in pleasure as she starts moving her hips.
This time it feels different for them. The feeling was better and more intense. She shuts her eyes as she feels the pleasure coursing through her. Her hips moved deep and slow. Hannibal closed his eyes as well. As her hips moved his hands tightened their grip on her hips. She moans at the feeling causing him to open his eyes. Her head was back and her mouth was open.
Her hips were now picking up speed no long slow and deep. “Fuck.” He groaned as he felt her clenching around him. His bed was squeaking with each of her thrusts. “Hanni.” She moaned and looked down at him. She grabbed one of his hands and moved it to her boob. He squeezed it causing her to gasp.
His other hand moved to her clit and rubbed. She whined his name as she felt her high near. He groaned as he felt himself twitch inside of her. She grabbed the hand that was placed on her boob. Her hand squeezed his as she came with a scream of his name.
He grunted as he came right after her. Both of them moaning as she rode out their highs. She smiled as she collapsed next to him. Both of them were breathing hard and all sweaty. “Hannibal?” “Mhm.” “I love you too.” She said and turned towards him. “Oh and jealousy looks good on you.” She said and he gave her a side eye but smiled.
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flowerwrites06 · 2 days
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limelight euphoria — myg
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LIMELIGHT EUPHORIA | Yoongi | Oneshot | Request or Original 
Original Request: something like estranged partners but they need to be affectionate to each other in public occasions as they have an image to uphold (angst & petty jealousy) Plot: Two bandmates struggle to maintain a successful tour and their tumultous feelings for each other. Pairing: Rockstar!Yoongi x Rockstar!OC (Name: Kiku) Genre: Rock Band AU Type: Oneshot Rating: R18+ Word Count: 5.5k+ Warnings: angst, arguments, implications of cheating, explicit sexual content. Author’s Note: this was so much fun to write, I hope you enjoy!
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It was a dream come true and Kiku made sure that was the only thought rushing through her head when Namjoon announced they would be going on tour. The past few months had been nothing but hell with every night fuelled with a heated fight. Even now, Kiku sat far away from Yoongi when in another time, they would be sharing a chair in their studio gathering.
“We’ll be going around Asia,” Namjoon said. His face partially covered by the light plumes of tobacco smoke from the ashtray.
Kiku perked up at the mention. “How many dates in Kyoto?”
“We got two nights,” Namjoon replied, looking down at the different dates. “So you have time.”
Kiku hadn’t been in Kyoto for years. It would be nice to see something a bit more calm compared to the rushing city of Seoul, even though she enjoyed this most of the time. She remembered the daily ritual of her part-time job in the record store with her high school friend, Botan before going to practice with the band. It seemed so simple back then.
“How long will we be gone?” Yoongi asked in a raspy tone, scarred by constant smoking. One of their first cause for arguments was his consistent increase of smoking, drinking and drugs which Yoongi rebutted to be on account of her nagging.
Kiku had stopped nagging but the increases didn’t stop. He kept getting worse and the dark circles under his eyes became a permanent fixture.
“There will be two nights in Seoul and one night in Busan but the whole tour might take a few months,” Namjoon answered with a wave of his hand.
Taehyung cleared his throat, peering through his hair which was getting far too long over his eyes. “Is that gonna be good for you two?”
“We’ll be fine,” Kiku said with an unconvinced tone.
“You sure?” Namjoon asked this time which felt a bit too serious. “You’ve been fighting for the past two months straight.”
“We’ve taken some breaks to fuck,” Yoongi mused.
Kiku glared but tried to keep it brief. “We’ll behave. Promise.”
“She says that but she’s the one who starts the fights.” Yoongi tugged at the strands again, trying to push her because perhaps he knew she wanted something better than this.
That she wanted a partner who was sweet to her instead of aloof, who didn’t pound down drugs and smoke like it was the only thing he enjoyed anymore, who didn’t use fucking as a way to quickly quell bigger problems. He also knew that Kiku wouldn’t do anything to make it stop.
That was what made Kiku most angry and hurt. That he knew she would always keep this going and never let it stop.
“You’re starting it now,” Namjoon said to cut into any tension building.
Yoongi scoffed. “We’ll behave.” He ensured to keep his voice mocking regardless.
“Sure.” Taehyung grabbed a bottle of beer from the mini-fridge.
“Hey, you’ve fought with your girlfriend in front of us.” Yoongi gestured.
“Yeah, once.”
“My girlfriend is in the band so I’m stuck, it’s harder.” He waved his hand.
Kiku’s brows furrowed. “Don’t act like I just got here.”
“You act like you just got here.” Yoongi narrowed his gaze.
“Okay, see that, that’s a fight,” Namjoon said, gesturing to them. “Yoongi, stop being a dick. And Kiku, stop falling for it.”
Kiku rolled her eyes slightly. “Sorry.”
“Suck up,” Yoongi muttered to himself.
-
The morning of the tour should’ve been the easiest of all. But somehow, Kiku had to be welcomed with another tabloid. At first, she assumed it was just dramatic flairs especially since this tour was pulling them into worldwide articles. Unfortunately, pictures showed a different story.
Through a vision of red and heated anger in her chest, Kiku saw him. A drunken Yoongi guiding a girl into the hotel and the journalists having a field day with their buzzwords about how sad Kiku must be. What a pity that Kiku would see this and sob like a broken princess who lost her crown.
Kiku would’ve thrown her phone against the wall if she didn’t need to travel with her band and dipshit boyfriend. She took a deep breath, had a quick shower and stomped her way to the lobby where everyone waited. The crowd outside were much larger now than ever before.
A headache pricked at her forehead. She saw Yoongi from the corner of her eye but didn’t look his way, only getting a glimpse of his relaxed posture and dark hair over his face.
Kiku put her shades on to shield away the sunlight so her headache could be soothed.
“Should’ve gone through the backdoor,” Taehyung said in mumbling, deep voice from just waking up.
“They wanted to make a whole fuss. So hold your breath,” Namjoon said.
Kiku rubbed her temples as they began to open the door. She felt Yoongi’s hand on her back and immediately shifted away. She wanted to push him away and scream at him but clearly, that would only be more excitement for the assholes outside.
It truly was a moment to hold her breath when they finally began to walk through the crowd, getting pushed back by security guards. Everything was going as smoothly as it could. Until Yoongi decided to make her morning worse. All they had to do was get through the entrance door to their tour bus. But Yoongi had to show off as always. He grabbed onto Kiku’s hand, linking their fingers together.
He knew that Kiku had no choice but to pretend that nothing was wrong. That she didn’t want to slap him across the face for the confidence he held after what he did. Finally, the cool air from inside the tour bus cooled some of her skin and one of their security guards slammed the door shut.
As Namjoon and Taehyung moved to sit at her couches, Kiku yanked her hand back roughly. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” Kiku asked in a light rasp.
Yoongi’s brows furrowed. “What now?”
“Don’t just hold my hand for the pictures like a dickhead.” She gestured to the crowd.
“I was holding your fucking hand cause we were in a crowd.” Yoongi asked through gritted teeth. “Are you seriously gonna have a tantrum over that now?”
“Yoongi,” Namjoon said.
“No, it’s the first day and she’s already nit-picking about dumb shit all over again.” He glared at her.
Whatever tears were going to form in her eyes steamed with fury. “Just keep your damn hands off me.”
Yoongi scoffed with a bitter smile. “You’re a fucking brat, you know that?”
“Don’t put this on me, you’re the one who fucked this up in the first place.” Kiku ran her fingers through her hair.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
Kiku shook her head, looked over to their agent and grabbed the tabloid papers before they could explain anything. Even Namjoon wasn’t intervening. They all knew. Everyone knew and it only pushed her to throw the papers at Yoongi’s face. “Don’t talk to me about having tantrums. What the fuck is this?”
Yoongi wanted to scream and be angry but for a brief moment, he saw the headlines. He picked up the newspaper. It was clear. Him escorting a girl into the hotel. When he stared up, he saw niether Namjoon nor Taehyung looking his way but to the side. Nor their agent. For the past few months, it was both him and Kiku fighting back and forth. They were both at fault. But now he had done it. That final snap of a thread that was already fraying.
“Come on…” Yoongi looked over at Namjoon and Taehyung. Not Kiku but the rest of the band and the fucking agent. As if this was just a public faux pas. “…she’d been driving me crazy.” He gestured to her.
Kiku pursed her lips as hot tears began to form in her eyes. For the first time, her chest clenched. So he did do it on purpose, just to hurt her. “You’re a piece of shit.” She walked away to the bathroom and slammed the door shut.
The slam echoed throughout the bus as Yoongi stammered. The throes of his hangover were already making it difficult to explain himself. “Look, I don’t think anything happened.” He knew that was stupid even in all his stubbornness.
Namjoon’s disappointed face was enough to let him know this viscerally. “I’ll talk to you later. Just take a breather.”
-
The drive was uncomfortable as Yoongi expected. Everyone avoided his gaze and there wasn’t even energy to scold them on fighting again. He wanted to be stubborn to somehow maintain a level of integrity but just because he couldn’t remember what happened didn’t mean that he didn’t invite the damn girl into the hotel.
Yoongi was frustrated and got a separate hotel room, just to get some distance and air. But a dark part of him strayed too far and wanted to feel something other than anger.
Once the bus parked, Taehyung and Kiku walked out of the tour bus for a smoke. Kiku didn’t smoke often but Yoongi knew it was always when stress was at the highest point and she physically needed something to relax.
Yoongi stayed sat at the couch while Namjoon settled next to him with a beer. He didn’t say anything but it was a welcome to start explaining himself.
“I really don’t think I did anything,” Yoongi said. “I got high and I might’ve called her in.” It sounded so stupid and dumb but he kept wanting to explain as if it could somehow quell the true reality of his actions.
“Aside from it being a shitty thing to do, it wasn’t safe either, calling her to the hotel room.” Namjoon scratched his brow. “Without knowing who she was.”
“I know.” Yoongi kept his head lowered.
“And…what you said to Kiku today wasn’t okay.” His tone was grim and serious but Yoongi’s stubbornness chimed in.
“Come on, she’s said stuff too.”
“She didn’t cheat on you and then blame you for it,” Namjoon said blatantly like a quick slit to the throat. “Fighting is one thing, Yoongi. This is. . .”
Yoongi hated that Namjoon vocalised it. It was a passing comment that they could’ve so easily forgotten but here it was, landing on him like a thousand bricks. “I wasn’t blaming her.” His voice didn’t make it sound too convincing.
“You said she drove you crazy which is why—”
“—that’s not what I was saying, I was just angry.”
“You’re always angry, that’s why this is a shitshow.” Anger slowly laced Namjoon’s tone. “And you don’t even seem to care about apologizing to Kiku about it. It’s like some part of you thinks she deserved it.”
Yoongi stayed silent for a moment. There was no response because some horrible part of him did want to hurt Kiku and for the first time in a while, he felt himself coil at his own feelings no matter how brief they were. And what truly cut him was what Kiku must’ve known that was his intention. “Do you really think I’m that bad of a person?”
“You just proved my point by asking that first.”
Yoongi pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “Alright…alright, I fucked up.” He let out a long sigh. “I’ll go talk to her.”
“Actually talk this time.”
“I got it.”
-
After a few moments of gathering whatever courage he had, Yoongi walked outside in the cold night air to see Kiku. Taehyung saw him before she did and reluctantly cleared his throat, walking away to give them privacy.
Kiku didn’t look at him immediately, taking another puff of smoke and letting it plume in front of her before her gaze finally reached him. Her eyes were glossed and red from crying. Taehyung had always been the better one at handling an influx of emotions but it still gave Yoongi a strange feeling, a yanking of his heart.
He didn’t know how to comfort her anymore. Even now, he couldn’t ask or say anything. In all the flurry and dance of arguments, Yoongi felt awkward starting a regular conversation.
So she spoke instead.
“I want to break up,” Kiku said. Her words hung in the air, turning it to lead.
If there were words forming in his head, Yoongi now had no strength to speak them, his hearing grew numb for longer than he could control.
She took another swig of her smoke. “It’s the best way to go. We’ll go back to being bandmates and we can put this fucking mess behind us.” Kiku kept her gaze away when she said this.
Yoongi stammered, still unable to speak.
“I know you don’t like these types of conversations so you don’t have to say anything,” Kiku tapped the cigarette on the side of the bench. “Just pretend nothing ever happened. It’s better that way.”
The panging got worse, making him feel as if he were bleeding from the chest. “You want to completely pretend this never happened?” Yoongi asked.
Kiku raised her shoulders. “Yeah. It’s all crumbs left anyway.” She let out another bitter chuckle, her eyes glossing more. “What’s the point? You don’t like me and I don’t want you anywhere near me right now. So we forget.”
Crumbs. Their relationship was crumbs. There was some part of him, drowned in whiskey and numbed by sleepless nights, that awoke for a moment as if to argue against it. The stubborn part of him wanted to keep those thoughts inside. Kiku loved being dramatic, she loved heavy emotions in her conversation. It could’ve just been a simple breakup, but she wanted it all gone.
Yoongi assumed it was just dramatics. He even almost laughed.
But Kiku didn’t laugh.
Yoongi happily wanted to accept her anger but she didn’t react at all.
Her expression showed exactly what she expected from this arrangement. Nothingness. Just back to the way it was.
It was smart, Yoongi would give that much. If he started fighting now, it would not only be hypocritical but it also proved her point that they were crumbs. Irreparable.
He tightened his jaw, mustering whatever was left of the courage he had spent gathering before coming here. Only to fall apart like a pathetic idiot as he always did. His smoking, his drinking, his anger and now his infidelity. Everything had piled so high and packed so tightly that there was no escape in admitting this was pointless.
Yoongi was who he was and Kiku would not tolerate it. So let it die.
“Alright,” Yoongi said through gritted teeth.
“Alright.” Kiku stamped her cigarette and walked back to the tour bus.
-
The Korean leg of the tour seemed to go smooth enough. Kiku and Yoongi performed and enjoyed themselves without fighting a single time. Yoongi drank, smoked and partied to his heart’s content as he always wanted, relishing in his newfound freedom without worrying about Kiku’s disappointed face.
They even laughed together for a second although it was from a joke told by Namjoon. Yoongi seemed to have held this moment in his mind a lot longer than he liked to.
Unfortunately, things frazzled as exhaustion began to settle. On their second night in Tokyo, they were a couple of added songs as a specialty. Two of them being songs that were written by Kiku and Yoongi together.
Even as the song was performed, a vivid and visceral memory replayed in Yoongi’s head like a knife through his skull. Kiku was swaying her legs while sitting on a washing machine as Yoongi cleaned up the last of their dirty clothes. Her humming so close that the screaming crowd numbed around him. All he could hear was her humming in the laundromat.
Yoongi tasted the blackberry tint on her lips when he kissed her, caging her while she sat on the washing machine. He saw her smile. She hadn’t smiled at him in so long. So long that this memory felt like a dream. Some unknown, impossible thing that could never be attained again.
When the show was finished, Yoongi was yanked back into reality where his tongue only tasted the bitter notes of tobacco and whiskey instead of her sweet blackberry tint.
They walked backstage, taking a breather before making way back into the tour bus. Kiku walked into the dressing room to clean up.
Yoongi walked in and started to smoke. For a few quiet moments, he only glanced at her redoing her lipstick with the ends of her hair still matted with sweat. Even when haggard, there was a beauty to her that forced him to keep looking. In a moment of weakness, he walked over to her, leaning in and nudged his nose into her hair.
“Stop it,” Kiku muttered in a soft tone.
“You remember that song, don’t you?” Yoongi asked in the same voice as if a bubble formed between them.
“What?”
“The songs we did together.”
Kiku didn’t reply, patting herself down with a cloth. “I remember.”
“You always couldn’t sleep until you got it right on that day.”
“We had deadlines,” Kiku said.
“Months away. I’d have to calm you down.” Yoongi reached his face down again, hovering over the crook of her neck. “You remember how I calmed you down?”
Kiku’s expression turned angry as she turned around. “That bitch you slept with remembers better than I do.”
Yoongi raised his head with a sigh. “I told you nothing happened.”
“Like you’d ever be sober enough to gauge anything,” Kiku said. “I told you to leave this be.”
“That doesn’t mean we need to forget the good stuff.”
“The good stuff was when you weren’t coming to me drunk and high every night,” Kiku argued. “This, whatever the hell you are now, isn’t that Yoongi.” She gestured to him with a grimace. “I remember and miss that Yoongi, not you.” She turned on her heel and tried to walk away.
Yoongi grabbed onto her arm. “I’m still the same person.”
“No, you’re not.” Her eyes began to gloss again. Despite all the confidence he had before, the vulnerability in her face was something he didn’t prepare for. It was too soft, too broken for him to even begin fixing it. “Three years ago, you would’ve kissed me without needing to do a line of cocaine. Back then, you wouldn’t have needed an ultimatum and a fucking mistress before saying one kind thing to me. You are not the same person.” Her voice cracked and the sheer sound of it clipped Yoongi’s tongue like a needle pushed through it. “I know exactly who I fell in love with and the reason you’re angry is because you don’t know who that is anymore.”
The door opened to Namjoon with a concerned expression. “Hey, let’s go.” His eyes flickered from Kiku to Yoongi but he didn’t say anything.
Kiku wasted no time before walking away, past Namjoon and to the tour bus.
-
They arrived in Kyoto but by this time, Yoongi felt itching under his skin, as if something was missing. Like a glass of water right in front of him while he was dying of thirst but he couldn’t quite reach it.
What made it worse now was that Kiku seemed to have a new air of energy here.
She went to an old music store with them where they met one of Kiku’s old friends, Botan. He was a bigger man, not quite muscular but generally broad like Namjoon, his dark hair was fluffy as if freshly washed. His eyes immediately softened when he saw Kiku.
Botan perked up in excitement and hugged her tightly, carrying her off the ground easily.
Yoongi held in a groan as he looked away.
“I thought you’d never come back here,” Botan said.
“We’re here on tour,” Kiku said, a little breathless. “How’s the store doing?”
Botan ran his fingers through his hair. “It’s been good, not bustling but good.” He smirked. “Your old records are still here too if you want them.”
“I’d like grab some too,” Taehyung said, grinning.
“Of course, please, look around.” Botan gestured.
Yoongi kept his eyes fixed on like a hawk as Kiku walked to the backroom with Botan while they joked and laughed.
“Stop sulking,” Namjoon said.
“I’m not sulking.”
“Yes, you are. This is the most calm we’ve been in ages, don’t ruin it.”
“Sorry, my relationship problems are causing you inconvenience.”
Namjoon glared. “I didn’t tell you to cheat on your girlfriend, dipshit.”
Yoongi sighed in frustration. “I need a smoke.” He walked out of the store and started on his cigarette. He looked through the window and saw the view through the open door of the backroom. He saw Kiku laughing with Botan so easily without the slightest bit of effort. There had been a time when they would laugh the same way but now even starting a proper conversation was hard. He looked away, his chest feeling congested and pained at the realization that he was losing something important.
-
The band sat together in a hotel room after their concert in Kyoto, the cool air soothing their tired muscles and heated skin. Taehyung was already drunk so Namjoon helped him back to his hotel room, leaving Kiku and Yoongi alone. A more sober Namjoon would’ve double checked if they could be alright alone but this time a tipsier Namjoon was ready to go back to his hotel room.
Kiku rested back on the couch as the hotel door closed while Yoongi blew a plume of smoke above him. He began to cough.
“Stop smoking for a bit,” Kiku said as she tried to take the cigarette away but Yoongi moved his hand away.
“Not my girlfriend anymore, don’t need to do this.” His voice rasped heavily, half-lidded eyes looking at her.
“Am I not your friend anymore either?” Kiku tilted her head.
This loosened Yoongi’s fingers as Kiku grabs it from him and taps it off the ashtray. She poured two glasses of water to drink.
They sat in silence like this for a while. Maybe it was a silent test for both of them to see if someone shouted or if a minor comment could turn into a long argument. But nothing really happened.
“I’m sorry,” Yoongi spoke gently into the silence.
“What?”
“I know it’s late and stupid but…I am sorry.” He looked at her, straight in her eyes. “I never meant to hurt you. Even when I wanted to, I never wanted to go along with it.” Yoongi then rubbed the bridge of his nose.
“It’s done. We don’t have to worry about it anymore.” Kiku leaned her chin on her knees.
“Are you sure?” Yoongi asked.
Kiku blinked slowly. “I don’t forgive you but we can put it behind us.”
“Good enough.” Yoongi smiled.
She bit down her bottom lip, curling her toes as she watched the slight movements of his own lips.
Yoongi leaned forward and pouring vodka into the water.
“The point was to get a bit more sober.”
“For what exactly?” Yoongi hovered the glass over his lips before seeing her expression.
Kiku tapped the side of her glass, lips slightly parted like the gilded doors of a pleasure garden. Her eyes soft and sweet.
Without a word, Yoongi put his glass away.
Kiku smirked and stood up from the couch, walking over to the bedroom.
Yoongi followed suit, locking the door behind him. He didn’t wait for Kiku to turn before he moved her around, kissing her, hot and sweet with a hint of vodka on her tongue. The third he’d been nursing for most of the tour now finally quenched as she pressed her close to him, relishing in her warm embrace of his cheeks.
He ripped the webs of her fishnet stockings, kneeling down and pushing aside her panties, kissing in between the lips of her cunt.
Kiku held onto his head, throwing her head back as she jerked her hips forward. She moved back and laid on the edge of the bed, spreading her legs. Yoongi ripped the fishnet stockings further, letting her legs hang over his shoulders before he devoured her cunt which was sodden with arousal.
Yoongi hummed against her clit, sucking on it with vigour and passion until pleasure thrummed from Kiku’s lower belly to her head. He licked a stripe up her clit, lapping his tongue as Kiku let out a shaking moan. He kissed each of her lips, using one of his fingers to get his fingers drenched, teasing her entrance.
He lifted and pushed his two fingers into her mouth soak them further. A hint of her arousal touched her tongue, making her mad with pleasure.
Yoongi slid the glistening fingers into her, curling up like muscle memory, knowing the places that made her back arch. He relished in her hands gently brushing through his hair and the taste of her in his mouth. He listened to the squelching of her cunt as Kiku desperately whimpered towards her pleasure.
He kissed the soft, sensitive skin between her lower belly and her core. His fingers curled up, brushing against her sweet spot until made her thighs tremble against him. Yoongi pressed another hot kiss atop her clit. Pulling his fingers out, he relished in the way she whimpered desperately.
Kiku lifted herself up, moving Yoongi to lay down on his back so she could straddle him. She pulled her black t-shirt off showcasing her lace bra.
Yoongi took his chance to caress her breasts, using the texture of the lace to erect her nipples.
She unbuttoned his pants, pulling out his cock and rubbing her wet cunt up the length. The corner of her lips curled in ecstasy before sliding herself down until she was full of him. Kiku hummed in delight, swaying her hips, not waiting as she got into a steady rhythm. Her fingers gripped the fabric of his shirt as Yoongi dug his nails into the sweet skin of her ass, still barely covered by her fishnet stockings.
The pleasure thrummed from her core to her toes, making her head dizzy. Kiku may have fought him and distanced herself from him but there was no denying that she missed this. His rough, passionate touch and the feeling of his cock shaping her insides according to her own rhythms. She loved it. She loved him but hated everything about him. It was a cruel feeling, but not one to have right now.
Yoongi’s moans grew ragged, messy as both their orgasms rolled to the edge.
Kiku threw her head back, moving faster and faster until the bed began to creak against pressure. She bounced up and down feeling him getting heavier as her own lower belly began to grow hot with frustration.
“I’m close,” Yoongi breathed out.
Kiku bit down her bottom lip, growing feverish with her pace. Her cunt squelched and ached as her orgasm finally exploded.
Yoongi jutted his hips up, shooting his warm release into her as Kiku’s own bliss ricocheted through her body.
Kiku cried out in pleasure, riding out their orgasms, letting the arousal spill all around them. She rested on his chest, leaned in and kissed him gently.
They didn’t say much to each other. No explanation, no clarification, just calm and bliss.
“Thailand tomorrow?” Yoongi asked.
“Yep.”
-
Their routine of fighting to silence had now turned to a ritualistic fucking session after each concert. Each interaction got more and more friendly, warm which led to a steamy night in the hotel room that left them both blurred in their own ecstasy.
Yoongi wanted to relish in this for as long as humanly possible. He really did. But the small, starving moral part of him knew this wasn’t a compromise that made Kiku truly happy. She was enjoying it and she was excited but even in his idiocy, he knew they weren’t happy like they used to be.
It was their final night in Hong Kong when lying in bed together, sweat sheening their skin. Kiku sat on the bed, sketching out some thoughts while her dark hair flowed down her back and a nightie haphazardly draped over her body.
“I know I’m not really the person to bring this up but…” Yoongi said, mostly looking at her back. “What are we doing?”
“We’re sitting after a fuck,” Kiku said, still facing her notepad.
“We’ve been doing nothing but fucking.”
“No, there’s talking and we’re getting along now.”
“Because we’re fucking.”
“It’s a good stress reliever.”
“You haven’t forgiven me.”
Kiku stopped sketching now, looking over her shoulder. “I told you I wouldn’t.”
Even though Yoongi expected her to say something like that, it still ached a little knowing that was still her view of him. It was stupid to think otherwise, Yoongi wouldn’t have forgiven anyone for cheating either but it still hurt. “So why do this?”
“Do you not want to do this?” She put her notepad away.
“I want to but—”
“But what?”
Yoongi sighed and sat up on the bed properly. “Look, this is fine but it’s not something you do. You don’t leave things blurred.”
“I have to,” she said. “I’m not getting back together with you and our tour’s been going so smoothly with this system.”
“So after the tour…what happens then?” It was a heavier question than Yoongi wanted it to be but Kiku seemed to think on it deeply.
“I’m going back to Kyoto and helping out Botan with the shop.” She played with the fabric of the hotel blanket. “We’re going to be taking a break anyway and I need some time to reflect.”
Yoongi did ask and he got an answer, but that didn’t change the fiery frustration in his chest. “With Botan.”
Kiku narrowed her gaze. “With Botan, yes, Yoongi. I love you but did you really think I was going to heal with you?”
Yoongi stammered, no argument left on his tongue. “You could’ve told me that.”
“You wouldn’t have cared. Maybe now but not then.” Kiku hugged her knees to her chest.
Yoongi could do nothing else but sit in silence again.
-
The tour ended sometime during the edge of autumn and Yoongi spent his holiday at a new café down the road of his apartment. Since his place was now emptied, he felt uncomfortable sitting there alone as opposed to looking like a lonely sob at his corner. Kiku had moved to Kyoto already.
Yoongi wanted it to be a calm morning but unfortunately, the waitress serving him turned out to be a familiar face. The girl he had brought into the hotel room. Her eyes widened when she recognized him but Yoongi could only stammered.
“You don’t remember me?” she asked with a nervous chuckle.
Yoongi furrowed his brows before shifting uncomfortably. “No, sorry, I know who you are.”
She smiled, serving him the black coffee he ordered. “Heard about your break. How’s it been?”
“Not great, I’m alone in a café and I feel like shit.” Yoongi chuckled,
“Well, if you need anything, let me know.”
“Actually…”
She turned to look at him again.
“This is gonna be a crappy question but…did anything happen between us?”
The girl blinked slowly.
“Like I remember you but I don’t…you know…” Yoongi gestured.
“Well, I remember us doing a few lines and drinking.” She played with her fingers. “You kept complaining about your bandmates and then you fell asleep.”
“We didn’t…”
“I mean, I think we both tried but were too wasted to do anything. So no.” She smiled nervously. "And no, I didn’t do anything while you were asleep.”
“Thanks.” Yoongi waved his hand and the girl turned on her heel to leave.
-
When Yoongi returned to his apartment, he should’ve gone straight to writing new songs on his guitar but his mind kept rushing to call Kiku. Telling her that nothing actually happened even though the girl did mention that they tried. It was bad but a selfish part of him so desperately wanted to grasp at the thread of hope that this could be revived somehow. Anything to bring light back to his place.
Yoongi opened his phone as he rested on the couch, his lit cigarette hanging off his fingers, dropping ashes on the ashtray next to the couch. He scrolled through his contacts but his courage hadn’t quite mustered.
Like a pathetic stalker, Yoongi began to scroll through Kiku’s socials instead. He found new pictures of her at the record store. She was glowing and smiling to her heart’s content like nothing worried her. If he called her right now, he knew that smile would disappear and it would be another pattern of the same shit.
Kiku had to heal and so did he in his own way.
For the first time, he wanted to take no interest in proving himself right. So he shut his phone off and put out his cigarette. 
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