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a-solitary-marshmallow · 4 years

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Baby Take a Bow - Chapter 4

Taako grumbled as he tossed bits and pieces around the kitchen. So much for kicking back this cycle. He’d spent all morning combing the woods with Lup and Merle only to come up empty-handed, and then Davenport had the audacity to stick him with babysitting for the afternoon! Just great.

Tot-Magnus trailed after him over the tiles. “Watcha doing?”

“Cooking.”

“Watcha cooking?”

“Surprise.”

“Oh.” Magnus paused in the middle of the kitchen and started to gnaw on his thumb nervously. The little demon would chew through it at this rate. Taako conjured a rubber chewie toy shaped like an elephant and popped it into Magnus’s mouth in passing. The kid let out a surprised sound.

Taako dropped his bucket of apples onto the bench and started peeling with a practiced hand. Magnus, chewing absently on his toy, wandered over and crawled onto a chair to peek at what Taako was doing.

“Apples!” Magnus crowed excitedly. “Why are there so many?”

“They’ll go bad if we leave them for too long and this planet has plenty of fruit already, so I’m using them all up.”

“Can I help?”

“Sure, pass ‘em to me, my man.”

Soon Taako had finished peeling and chopping the apples into pieces. Magnus watched the quick knifework with stars in his eyes. Next came the rhubarb, and then he swept them into a pot to stew and started working on the crumble. He darted around the kitchen to retrieve the ingredients he needed.

Magnus watched him curiously from his chair, still gnawing happily on his chewie toy. At one point he dropped it and Taako caught it with a quick mage hand. He conjured a cord, strung the toy with it and tossed the chewie-necklace around Magnus’s neck to stop him dropping it again. Magnus cooed happily.

Taako dropped the measured ingredients and a bowl in front of the kid.

“Alright, time to make yourself useful ya little nuisance. I want that mixed together, and if you use your hands to do it you’ll be eating Merle’s cooking for a week.”

Magnus giggled and got to work mixing with entirely the wrong kind of spoon. Still, better than using his grubby mitts. Taako got to work on making ice cream. None of that store-bought shit. Just because the shops on the last plane sold that crap didn’t mean he had to buy it. Taako wished he’d had time to school that prissy ice-cream-man on how to make proper ice cream. The guy would have been weeping at his feet.

The crumble was well and truly stirred, but Magnus seemed pretty happy going at it so Taako let him continue. It wasn’t like crumble could get over mixed. While the ice cream was freezing and the fruits were stewing away, Taako made a decision.

“Alright, move over, short stuff.” He retrieved the bowl of crumble and slapped down a ball of cookie dough that he’d left to sit in the fridge last night. “You want sugar highs? Of course you do, you brat. What you wanna do is roll out the dough, like so, cut it into shapes, and put it on this tray, capishe?”

“Okay.” Magnus said brightly.

“Well hurry up, pumpkin, we don’t have all day.” Taako waved his hand and went off to start constructing the apple crumble and put it in to bake. The few times he passed Magnus, the kid was hard at work. Ha – that’d show Barold. Who occupies a kid with painting skulls? Of course Taako was the far superior babysitter. He was probably Magnus’s favourite, too.

Or he better be, after feeding the critter. Taako refused to let his ears blush at the thought of being the favourite.

“Ko!” Magnus squeaked. Taako ducked over to glance at the cookie-dough shapes on the tray. “Look, I did it!”

“Choice, my man. What are they?”

“That one’s a cookie.” Magnus said very seriously.

“Uh, yeah, no duh. What’s the shape?”

“It’s shaped like a cookie, duh!” Magnus screwed up his stupidly adorable face. “And this one’s a monster, and this one’s the ship,” He pointed out a couple others that Taako lost track of, “and this one’s your hat!”

Taako looked dubiously at a vaguely pointy-looking shape. “This one, huh?”

Magnus beamed at him.

“…good job, honeybun. Looks just like the real deal. What do you say we put these bad boys in the oven, then we can ice them?”

By the end of the afternoon Taako had a tray of shitty-looking cookies, a dish of apple crumble and a tub of ice cream to show for it, just in time to pawn Magnus off on someone else while beginning to make dinner. He flagged down a passing Merle.

“Yo, Merle, come take the shortstuff for a while. I’ve got actual cooking to do.”

Merle waddled over and Magnus looked distraught. “What? But we were having so much fun!”

“Yeah, pumpkin, but Taako’s got work to do.” Taako opened the fridge and reached for the vegetable compartment – only to feel something small latch onto his leg.

“Please don’t make me go! I wanna stay here with you!” Magnus wailed.

Of course kid Magnus would be throwing temper tantrums. Adult Magnus was like, the most childish person Taako knew, and he was an adult.

Taako just wasn’t used to how small he was now, how tiny and fragile and trusting he was. How badly he wanted company, Taako’s company. Taako very carefully did not turn around and did not let Merle see how his eyes were prickling. The stupid dwarf seemed to notice anyway.

“I’ll just leave the baby with you.” He snickered. Taako could feel his cheeks and ears blush furiously. He didn’t turn around until the sounds of Merle’s waddling footsteps had retreated from the kitchen.

Taako took a deep breath, blinking hard to clear his eyes before swiveling around to glance at the human child still attached to his leg. Magnus was sniffling and looked ten seconds away from a full meltdown.

“Jeez, all you had to do was ask, no need to throw a tantrum. You wanna help me make dinner for everyone?”

Magnus sniffed and nodded.

“Cool. Imma need you to let go of Taako’s leg, then we’ve got a lasagna to make. Let’s cook some gourmet fucking food.” He paused. “Shit, don’t repeat that. Wait, don’t say that either.”

“Don’t say gourmet?” Magnus asked weakly.

“Err, no, you can say that.”

“You mean ‘fuck’?”

“You wash your mouth out with soap, young man. Now get over here and wash your grubby hands too, before you touch any of my food that’s not gonna be peeled.”

“Okay!” Magnus, bright once again and with only a few tear tracks remaining from his tantrum, scurried over to the sink. Taako most definitely did not swipe tears from his traitor eyes.

Babysitting was stupid. If anyone tried to take Magnus away he was gonna cast Magic Missile on their kid-stealing ass.

#taz #taz balance #balance #my fic #my writing #btab

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billie-ford · 4 years

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1 2 3 4

A Home Made

What felt like hours in the agonizingly cramped space were only made worse by the sudden sound of a foreign voice from above and the threatening rattle of the wood concealing Billie within. A conversation was taking place. She couldn’t make out the words or even the voices providing them but after too long the hinges squeaked and an already cramped Billie shoved her folded frame as far into the shadowed corner as possible, afraid that the rapid beat of her heart and the increasing shake of her breathes had begun to emit sound.

“Billie?” It was Jesus.

It was the feeling of an officer finding her after a home invasion. A sigh of relief subdued the shake of her shoulders as the Hilltop resident pulled her from the bunker and dusted her off.

“Are you sure they’re gone?”

He nodded, “I watched them all go.”

“Millie? Sasha? Maggie? Where are they? Are they okay?” “Come with me.”

Though the speed of her stride matched his, there was an urgency in her step as they made their way through the long winding halls of Gregory’s mansion until they reached the french doors of his office, Billie throwing them open to find the three women stood along his desk. Millie smiled at her, relieved, and ran to hug her aunt who, much like before, took her into her arms tightly.

“Jesus hid us in a closet.” She mumbled into the fabric of Billie’s shirt before pulling back to smile warmly at Jesus. Billie looked to him too, nodding in silent thanks which he returned with a kindly gaze.

“Ah, Billie..” The familiar monotone pitch of Gregory’s voice made Billie’s jaw clench as she turned to acknowledge the older man. Since the day they met he had an unmistaken glint of disdain in his eye for her and this moment in time was no exception; after all they were asking an awful lot to be refuged within his community with the lurking danger of the Saviors.

“I was just telling your friends about Ms. Caitlin’s famous rhubarb preserve you all can take with you on your journey home. Our way of saying thank you for all the help you’ve been during your time in the Hilltop Colony.”

Billie’s ears perked like a curious dog, “who said anything about leaving?”

That same glint in his eye darkened his iris as he took a sip of whiskey before clearing his throat. “Well, seeing as how the Saviors could come back for whatever reason I’d say it’s best for the three- four of you to be gone to avoid any further..uh..close calls.”

The adults shared a look before Billie spoke again. “We had a deal, Gregory.”

“We did. And now that deal is done. I can’t risk the safety of my community for three strangers who wandered in-”

“Your community’s safety or your own hyde?”

Gregory guffawed, “well what difference does it make?”

Before Billie could say more, taking a confident step forward, Sasha grabbed her gently by the arm, halting her movements. “We’ll go.” She said. “But Maggie stays... We’ll call it even on everything we’ve done around here.”

He looked her up and down, the blue in his eyes suddenly clouded with attraction rather than contempt. It made Billie’s skin crawl as she scowled. “No deal. But it’s been lovely having you here.”

“Just tell me how we can make this work.”

Those owlish eyes that harbored so much attraction fell to the low neck-line of Sasha’s t-shirt. He licked his lips at the sight of the day’s sweat glistening off of dark skin, highlighting collarbone and cleavage. “I think we’d need to...meet on that one-on-one just to explore-”

“Go to Hell.” Maggie growled through gritted teeth.

With an eyeroll and a huff Billie grabbed Millie by the wrist. “C’mon, Mills.” Before another word was spoken she was hauling the teen out of the room and outside to the community grounds.

“What are you doing?” Millie squeaked.

“You’re going home.” “What? No!”

She tore herself from her grip, staring in wide-eyed disbelief at her aunt. “I can’t go! I just got here.”

Avoiding the gazes of the community members that watched them curiously Billie pulled the teen close and through a clenched jaw spoke, “That man in there couldn’t give a rat’s ass if you lived forever or died tomorrow. And after everything that’s happened I will not risk your life for a single thing a’right? Every second you’re here is a risk. It’s a risk for all of us. You and I both are going back to Alexandria before anything can get out of hand. You got me?”

“Bill-” “Do you understand me, Millie?”

The teen sighed. “I understand, Billie..”

“Go get your things and meet me at my trailer. We’re gone once I’m packed..”

“You don’t have to listen to Gregory- You can’t you leave!”

Maggie followed Billie closely as she scurried around her trailer, tossing books and papers over her shoulder while locating clothing to stuff into her bag.

“I never should have stayed, Maggie. I was being selfish... I-I can’t even imagine how many questions everyone has back home, Rosita’s probably worried sick- they don’t even have anyone to lead them! I need to go back, a’right? It’s best for all of us.”

“I need you too, Billie. I wouldn’t have even gotten here if it weren’t for you- gosh, would you just stop and look at me?” Billie huffed and dropped the things in her hands to the couch before turning towards the mother-to-be. Maggie reached out for her friends’ elbow, the gentlest of touches, and rubbed her skin to the effect of Billie relaxing her shoulders. “This is our home now. I told Gregory- Jesus told Gregory we aren’t going anywhere. Just stay.”

Billie chewed her bottom lip nervously, thoughtful eyes darting around the room. She shook her head slightly, more to herself than the woman standing before her. “I have to go, Maggs...”

Sadness filled her eyes when she realized her friend couldn’t be shaken on this and she sighed with a defeated understanding. Had roles been reversed, Maggie would have wanted to get home to Glenn just as bad. “Stay the night. Just one last dinner before you go.”

“I have-” “Just..just the night.”

The door to the trailer whined on it’s hinges and both women snapped their heads towards the intruder. It was only Millie. “I’m ready to go...” She muttered, back pack thrown over her shoulder and a jar of rhubarb preserve in her fist. Billie looked between the two. Maggie was almost positive that if she could read the thoughts behind her eyes, she could write a novel a day. It almost frustrated her; seeing how Billie’s mind raced yet hardly ever being let in on what it all was.

“You can leave your bag here for the night.” Maggie’s eyes lightened. “We can stay one last night.”

The teen let out a breath of relief and dumped the heavy bag to the floor. “Thank God. I really didn’t want to do all that walking again.”

Maggie laughed, outstretching both arms to clasp the Fords on their shoulders. “Come by my trailer later tonight, we can all eat there.”

Billie agreed and with that, Maggie headed off to relay to Sasha and Jesus the news of their departure.

The countertop stove sizzled as Millie tossed slice after slice of bread into the hot pan, the delicious aroma of heated butter and melting cheese mingling with the fresh tomato soup bubbling in the pot beside it. The bluesy rock of Chuck Berry played from the small radio Billie brought along while she vibrantly told one of her stories over her third Budweiser of the night.

“I turn my back for two seconds and BAM! She’s getting churned up in the neighbors fuckin’ lawnmower!” Maggie gasped with a sputtered laugh. “And the thing is, I hated the nasty thing every day I had it. But the second she was gone? Mourned her for months.”

Maggie shook her head in amused disbelief. “Rest in peace, Milk dud the snake.”

“You don’t appreciate what you have until it’s gone..” Billie muttered before taking another swig of her beer. Maggie found that once a beer or two was in a Ford sibling you could get them to loosen up in just about any situation, and sinisterly she wondered if she could convince her to stick around under such influence. The door opened behind them, which caused Maggie to jerk forward, alert, and spin around to see Sasha walking through the door way.

“Is that an apple pie?” She was standing to take the dish before the sweet smell had even reached Billie just a few steps behind her. Sasha pulled back the cloth concealing the sweet treat with a huff.

“How did you know?” “I could smell it from the other side of the door.”

“That’s pregnancy for ya,” Billie mumbled between bites of grilled cheese, “heightens all the senses.” She watched as Maggie cleared the table for the dessert, digging a fork into the flaky crust and taking an unreasonably large bite. “You wanna plate, mama?”

“No, I’m good.”

Billie swiveled on her seat to face Sasha who sat on the couch just behind her, a pensive look knitting her brows together as she rubbed thumbs over two daggers pulled from her boots.

“Jesus give you those?” Billie asked. She nodded. “S’he still around? Wanted to talk to him about mapping out routes between here and Alexandria, y’know, for safety purposes.”

“Oh, there’s some things I wanted to add to his list before he goes out.” Maggie added with a mouthful of apples and dough, “kids need something to write with - pens, pencils.”

Millie chuckled, “Maybe they can draw up some posters when Maggie runs for president.”

Sasha sighed. “He left already. He told me to tell you, but I-I forgot.” Billie stared at her. She stumbled over her words, and her palms rubbed absentmindedly against her outer thighs. Maggie hmphed in disappointment.

“Okay. Maybe next time... I’m gonna get some milk.” And before Sasha could protest to get it for her, she stood quickly and scurried out the door. Billie’s eyes darted between the door and Sasha who looked back at her friend with an inquisitive look of her own.

“Millie go help her.” Billie ordered.

“Help her get milk?”

She cut her eyes at the teen who dropped the spatula in hand with a hard exhale and stormed out of the room. You could just ask me to leave, she mumbled. With arms crossed and an ankle swung over her knee, Billie turned back to Sasha.

“What?”

“You lyin’ to Maggs about somethin’?” “What makes you think that?” “I can read it on ya.”

She rolled her eyes. Sometimes, Billie was just too much like Abraham, remit the pet names and know-it-all grin he gave when successfully catching someone in a lie. It was something Sasha would miss about him, but she didn’t love it coming from the younger Ford.

“It’s for her own good.” “Why?” “Billie-” “Is it Negan?”

The color drained from her face, her silence bloated the room. Billie was standing now, hands on the table as she leaned forward as if inspecting Sasha’s expression for clues. “You want to kill Negan.” They held a stare that felt threatening before Billie grunted. “Do I really have to tell you why that’s a bad idea?”

“I didn’t want to tell her because I knew she would want to help me. And..and I didn’t want to tell you because I knew you would want to talk me out of it. But if it’s just me than it doesn’t fall on either of you when it happens.

“But it ain’t just you. You think I wanna pick daisies with the bitch that killed my brother?” “I didn’t say you did.”

Sasha stepped forward, her breath brushing Billie’s face as she searched her eyes with a pleading look. “If you care about Maggie, you don’t say anything about this. You’re going back to Alexandria where you and Millie will be safe and I’m staying here, and I have to keep her safe.”

“S’at where Jesus’ is goin’? To find where he lives?” “He was the only one I could trust to stay quiet about it.”

Billie wanted to yell at her, to shove her, to knock some sense into her for planning what would end up being a suicide mission behind their backs. But she knew she had to understand why she wanted to do it, and she knew that if she dug up enough repressed emotions still attached to that night she would end up joining her. Maybe it was the fact she felt more defeated than aggressive these days or the fact that she had grown content with all the memories she had of the brother slain by Negan, but she knew if they went out to wherever it was he hung his hat; they’d be buried right next to Abraham.

Billie sighed, even more defeated than before. “It isn’t just you..”

“It sure looks like it.”

She shouldn’t have been nostalgic about it before she had even stepped outside of the gates. But Billie had grown to love mornings at the Hilltop. A small sense of peace had settled within her when she opened her eyes to the small trailer around her and watched the day begin from her front row seat on her step with her first cigarette of many. However, this morning she awoke with a dreadful pit in her stomach. She tossed and turned so much through out the night that Millie offered to give her back the bed and before the sun had fully risen she was zipping up her boots and marching out to their private burial ground.

And that was where she had sat for hours, unbothered, listening to the chatter of the community begin just beyond the fence. She stared at her brothers grave almost expectantly, as if waiting for him to rise from the grave and had she not watched his brains get mangled it wouldn’t have been such a far fetched idea.

‘You can sit there all day and say whatever you wanna say to the dirt but he can’t fuckin’ hear you’. She cringed when she thought about those callous words she had spat at Sasha not long after she had buried a brother of her own. She cringed when she thought about the punch she rightfully earned from her too. It amused Billie how similar she was to the former firefighter, yet she couldn’t find the same courage to set out for Negan’s territory and blow a full metal jacket right through his chest. We’re stronger in numbers. But he has an army. Never stopped us before. But Abe wouldn’t want me to be stupid. He wouldn’t want me getting myself killed over him. But I might not get killed. But I could. I’ve survived worse odds.

Maggie had seen Billie when she woke up, her crouched frame just barely concealed by the wood fence when she made her way through the grounds for breakfast. After what Millie told her last night she wanted to go confront her, ask her why she and Sasha were arguing but it was her last day at Hilltop, and had it been her she would have wanted those last moments to be spent with Glenn’s grave.

She climbed the ladder to the guards platform, gazing out over the fields not concealed by the Hilltop walls and when she saw the figures that occupied the trail her chest swelled with a gasp. She couldn’t stop the wide grin that spread across her face. She turned back towards the community grounds and yelled as loud as she could. “Billie! Sasha! Millie!”

Trouble? It could be trouble. Billie tossed the rock she had fiddling between her fingers and ran off to find where Maggie was, conscious of the hunting knife on her hip. She came stumbling to a halt behind Maggie as the tall gates to the community opened; that wasn’t trouble at all. Billie’s sights fell on Rosita as the gates creaked open and ran to embrace the woman with tear-filled eyes. She half expected it to be a dream, and she would run right through her before her silhouette dissipated in the air. Yet her frame was solid, her arms welcoming, her grip on Billie just as desperate as their lips met for the first time in over a week. It felt like it had been centuries. Her hair was soft, tangled between her fingers, and her clothes smelled like her, earthy but sweet; Billie didn’t know she could miss a smell.

“What happened here?” Billie’s hand traced the features of Rosita’s face, the callous pad of her thumb falling on the fresh stitches of a vertical gash. She pressed her lips to it tenderly.

“It doesn’t matter. You’re okay?” “I am. We all are.”

She looked around them. Michonne, Tara, Odell, Sasha, Maggie, Millie, Jesus. They were all here and by the look on Michonne’s face - they came for one reason. “You were right from the start. You told us to get ready to fight. I didn’t listen, I couldn’t. I can now.”

Billie’s eyes darted to Sasha who met her gaze when the words were spoken. They were going to fight - they had to fight. If Billie believed in signs she would have taken their sudden appearance as one; the morning after she told Sasha she didn’t want to fight, after she had planned to head back to Alexandria to settle for slightly more peace - here they were. Billie knew what she had to do now, what was right for her brother. And for the first time in a long time she felt that tingle in her spine that squared her shoulders and lifted her chin high.

She felt hopeful.

#a home made #chapter five #writing #fanfiction #billie ford #maggie rhee #sasha williams #millie ford #paul 'jesus' rovia #gregory #rosita espinosa #michonne

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astainedteamug · 6 years

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Getting Rid of that Holiday Stress Ahead of Time

If you are finding yourself worried about the holidays, then you and I are in the same boat. And so is everybody else. Legitimately, everybody. Even the lady at work who always has a perfect party and she never has a hair out of place, she’s worried if her quiche will burn or if she will have enough decorations. Everybody has some kind of stress going on right now.

Some people are triple checking their travel plans to make sure everybody has a ticket and if they have a big enough budget. Some people are checking their list of people to give a gift to and realizing that they STILL don’t know what to get their mom for Christmas.

But whatever it is you are going through right now, you should take a minute off of your feet to read through this and see if one of these could help you.

1. The Clutter

It is amazingly easy to hold on to things in the modern world. And you don’t even know why. Especially after Halloween, there are candy wrappers, fairy wings, tiny toys, and just all around mess. The birthdays of the year have left you with gifts that you never wanted and you couldn’t return, so they wound up shoved in a corner to never be used or seen again.

But for some reason, you find yourself stressed out about it. That thing Jim gave you at your office party that was so ugly you didn’t even want it in your car. It’s bothering you that it’s still here, yet it has to take the back burner. And pretty soon, you start to feel like your house looks something like this:

Yeah, I know!

But between work and school and getting everything ready, you just don’t feel like you have the time to go through all of it.

Behold, my friends, the beauty of November. This is a beautiful grace period that most people will skip over to start putting up decorations for Christmas, thinking it will help them not be stressed about the decorations. But they are wasting perfectly good cleaning time. It’s time for a detox, and your house is begging you to do it, just this once.

Now wait just a minute, this isn’t an excuse to throw out your wife’s figurines that you hate but she loves, in fact I don’t recommend throwing much away at all. Go through your things first and donate what you can.

Old clothing, shoes, toys, books, purses or bags, and even movies. This is a great time of year to donate those things and let somebody else enjoy them. Old dishes can be sold or donated, dog and cat toys can get washed and de-stinkified. Candles that have been sitting around for years can get burned and help get any unpleasant smells out of your house while freeing up cabinet space for candles to come. Old mail and documents can get shredded and recycled, or even stocked up as fire starters for your fireplace. And those decorations that “complete the room” can be stowed away until they are needed again. Don’t let them jumble you up and stand in the way.

And this is an excellent way to see what you need around the house. Maybe you didn’t know the drill was broken, but now you know what to get your husband for Christmas. Or maybe the kids need new pjs. And that new coat would look great in place of your old one.

And once you’re done with the clutter aspect of all of this, then it’s time to move into phase two.

2. The Mess

It is entirely possible that the corner of your living room behind your television hasn’t been dusted in months, correct? It’s an easy thing to forget. It’s an easy thing to push aside, or to say to yourself “would anybody really notice?” Aunt Barbara might when she visits on thanksgiving with her specialty cranberry stuffing. And you would never hear the end of it. Okay, now punch your anxiety in the face and pick up a duster.

It really isn’t that big of a deal which corner is dusted and which one isn’t, but November is a wonderful time of peace before the holiday guests arrive, so why not make sure the house is nice so you aren’t worried about it. They’ll make a mess when they get there anyways, you may as well conquer what you can now. Get those expired bath products and cleaning concoctions out of your house before area 51 gets involved. Soap is NOT good forever!

Move around your furniture to sweep under it, dig out all of those coins and wrappers in the couch, dust off your movie and CD collection so you can pick out the holiday films for when everyone is over. You may as well put one on while you vacuum your floors, those corners and your ceiling fans and vents. Heck, you can even wash your carpets if your feeling REALLY festive!

There really isn’t any point to making the holidays harder on yourself than they already can be, so why not get a head start on all of that mess and just get rid of it? It can be a good excuse to have your kids wash the windows or clean their bathrooms, or even go through their clothes and toys and put everything they don’t use into one bag to donate. And with your mess all taken care of, you can take a breath and relax before you begin part three of this holiday mission.

3. The Food

This is the biggest time of year for food sales for home baking. Which also means the fire department is busy too. Please be careful whenever you are in the kitchen with loved ones and keep the heat down, your sockets dust free, and make sure all handles are out of reach of little ones. And remember, a falling knife has no handle.

All of those vegetables that are going into your casseroles and soups, or getting turned into a side, you know you can use your freezer, right? Chopping them up now and freezing them in the measurements that you need is an excellent time and mess saver for your holiday baking. Those fruits that you bought too early, go ahead and chop those up too and freeze them until the day you need them for your pies and fruit salads. And honestly, why did you buy SO MANY cranberries? Nobody eats them! Stop doing this to your wallet and to yourself.

Over spending on food and wasting it is another stupidly easy thing to do. Half of it rots away before it even sees the cutting board. You can stop yourself from doing this with a few easy tools, like shopping lists, dates, and coordination with the other cooks in your family.

Everybody should bring a dish to thanksgiving. Whether it’s a pie, some creamed corn, or even something to drink. You won’t be the only cook during the week leading up to thanksgiving. So coordinating with your relatives about who is bringing what will save everybody from making the same thing and will make sure nobody is confused about what they’re doing and keeps you from making too much of one thing if not everybody is able to come. Especially if Kenny is the only person who is vegan and gluten intolerant, then his special dish doesn’t need to be fussed over this year. And everyone can bring something, even if uncle Dave just brings the disposable cups so grandma doesn’t have to do a million dishes with the grandkids later. And yes, everybody needs to do their share of work after dinner. A good rule of thumb is to clean up dishes before dessert.

But before the baking even begins, you need to figure out what ingredients you will need to buy to make that food. And some ingredients can be nearly impossible to get your hands on. You would not believe how difficult it was for me to find rhubarb for my pie this year. I had to google where I could get it, and it took me a few hours to get ahold of it. So making that shopping list can save you lots of time and hassle when it gets down to the wire. And having the dates of parties and holidays next to you makes it easy to know when you’ll need to shop for that food and save space in your fridge.

Ah yes, the fridge. Your old pal, full of old take out containers, a few odds and ends when it comes to ingredients, expired dairy products, and an endless assortment of condiments. Why do we do this? The fridge looks full, yet there’s nothing to eat.

Clean it! That smell can be taken care of with a box of baking soda. Just leave it open in he back corner and it will absorb it for you. Take your trash can and have it ready for the avalanche of forgotten meals it will need to hold. The old products and empty cartons need to get thrown out now so you can have space for leftovers during the holidays, but you’re much less likely to forget about those. Once you’ve emptied out all of the rotten veggies and old yogurts, now is the time to wash the shelves and clean it up in there to get a head start on the dishes.

Bravo. You have earned another break. But you are so far from being done.

4. The Yard

This is an ongoing task, and I’m afraid not much can be done that will stay done. Especially if you live somewhere the leaves turn red and then fall every time the wind blows. Honestly, it can’t really all be done at once. But after it snows, it has to stay there. That stick could trip you if your boot snags it and you forgot it was there. Those leaves will kill your lawn if they stand as a frozen barrier between the grass and the snow. And the weeds will only populate while they can.

Head to a hardware store and grab some tools if you need them. And get some gloves too, those thorns can be vicious. Taking care of lawn maintenance before you decorate should be high on your list of to-do’s, yet many people skip it all together. Clean out your gutters and send your hubby on the roof with a broom before you send him up with lights and a fake santa. It’s safer and it can actually save your roof from too much damage all at once.

Mow the grass while you can, trim your bushes before they get lined with lights, and rake those leaves up before they have to stay put for the next four months.

And if you have a dog, this is your last chance to double check nothing was left behind when your kids last took them outside.

5. The Car

If you’re traveling with your family, you have to clean out your car now! The tissues, old receipts that need to be organized, wrappers, straws, socks, and crumbs all need to go.

Suitcases and crock pots will soon take their place as well as bored kiddos and grumpy adults just trying to drive through the traffic. Pack those CDs into the car, download some podcasts, or get some audio books to help pass the time. But make sure the smell is gone too. Get a new air freshener and some febreeze. It’s amazing how much smell can come from one toddlers sock.

6. Finances and Documents

That giant pile of papers in your room, on your desk, or in your coffee table? Yeah, it won’t take care of itself. And during the holidays. The last thing you want to worry about is knocking it over so it isn’t 'organized’ anymore. Go through it now.

This will give you the chance to get your finances in order before you spend three hundred dollars on lights for the tree when really you can only spend thirty. I found a paper I wrote in fifth grade the other day, and tossed it right out. Honestly, why do we cling to these things? It has been in my life for ten years, and it has served its purpose. Now it’s time to go. This frees up space not only in your desk, but in your mind as well. It was one of those little things that you had been worried about for far too long. And now it’s finally gone.

7. The Decorations

Now is the time, folks, to get your final affairs in order. We are now approaching the holidays so please prepare for landing.

Decorations are the easiest thing in the world to freak out over when you get down to the wire. You count the lights, you measure for garland, you buy the plates and the napkins and even special straws that are made of paper. Candy canes are beautiful on a tree, but the tree isn’t up yet. Not to worry though. Your shopping list is that much smaller because you already took care of it.

Buying what you can ahead of time is something I’ve been doing since April. Buying candles, drinks, and even some gifts before they’re at their holiday prices is something I do to avoid the crowds and the chaos. Yes, I’m on a budget and I know how to work the system to my favor. Buying discount wrapping paper and tinsel the year before is nothing to hide, and props to you if you make your own decorations.

That’s what I did. Wreaths can be up to $70 when they come pre decorated. I bought one for ten and put my own decorations and lights on it for less than forty dollars. And I’ll use it over and over again. Making decorations can also help tame that beast inside of you that is screaming at you to put up the lights now! It’s not even thanksgiving, calm down you little elf.

Once you’ve ticked all of these things off of your list, you’ll find it much easier to breathe while you wrap gifts or wade through the sea of people at the mall. Having your lists organized, your budget in mind, and the peace of mind that your house is organized and ready, you’ll be unstoppable this holiday season!

Happy holidays everybody!

#food #holidays #happy holidays #christmas #cleaning #detox #stress relief #stressed #stress #tidy #tidyup #decoration #christmas lights #prepare for the holidays #oh boy #head start

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choclette8 · 4 years

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One crumble recipe, eleven different desserts. This recipe for classic rhubarb crumble is made with only four ingredients. But in case you want something a little fancier, you’ll find ten easy ways to add variety and flavour.

Rhubarb crumble is a classic British pudding and everyone seems to have their own version of it. It’s absolutely delicious served warm with custard, although cream is good too.

Classic Rhubarb Crumble

Sometimes, you just want a basic recipe with no frills and furbelows. And this classic rhubarb crumble pares things right down to the basics. It contains only four ingredients and is really quick and easy to prepare. It’s also absolutely delicious.

Pulled rhubarb from our allotment.

It’s the trimmed sticks you need for this recipe.

I adore rhubarb and always look forward to the season. This is the first year for many years that we’ve harvested our own and it’s really quite exciting. With the first of the crop, I just want to make a rhubarb crumble.

Chop the rhubarb into roughly 2 cm pieces.

Scatter the rhubarb pieces with demerara sugar.

The crumble takes a little while to cook, but the hands on bit only lasts for ten minutes. All you need to do is chop some rhubarb. Place it in a greased oven proof dish and sprinkle some sugar over the top. Then rub butter into wholemeal flour along with a bit more sugar and spoon over the rhubarb. And bake! So simple, so quick, so easy.

Crumble topping prior to baking.

Crumble topping once baked.

Don’t worry too much about quantities. After all, this is your crumble and you should make it exactly how you like it or according to how much rhubarb you have. If you’ve got a bit more rhubarb, so much the better. Maybe you’ve got less, that’s fine too. If you prefer to have less or more crumble, just decrease or increase the amounts accordingly.

A good crumble falls into three distinct layers, sometimes four. There’s a rhubarb layer at the bottom, then a layer where the rhubarb juices soak into the crumble as it cooks. That’s the best bit I reckon. Then you have the crumbly top. You can also get a crunchy top layer, but you’ll need to look at one of my ten variations for that.

Rhubarb crumble is best served warm. Leave it for five minutes or so after it comes out of the oven. Because if it’s too hot it’s likely to burn your mouth. Serve it with warm custard, pouring cream, ice-cream or for a special treat, clotted cream. ‘Ansum.

Sugar

Rhubarb is quite sour, so depending on how sweet you like your puddings, you may want to add a little more or a little less than the stated amount of sugar in the recipe. I don’t like my fruit to be too sour, but nor to I like overly sweet puddings.

You can use any type of sugar in this classic rhubarb crumble. Each one will give a different taste and texture. I like to use demerara sugar with the rhubarb as it just seems to work well with it. But I prefer golden caster sugar for the crumble. It’s easy to mix in, doesn’t colour the crumble and the flavour isn’t as overt as most of the others. Muscovado will give varying degrees of caramel notes, depending whether you use light or dark. Other brown sugars will do much the same thing.

How Do You Make Vegan Rhubarb Crumble?

The humble crumble is a particularly easy pudding to veganise. All you need to do is swap the butter for solid coconut oil or a vegan butter. I use coconut oil as it doesn’t have any additives and it also gives a nice coconutty flavour.

Can you Make Gluten-Free Rhubarb Crumble?

Yes you can. Similar to the vegan version, all that’s needed to make this classic rhubarb crumble gluten-free is a simple swap. Use your favourite gluten-free flour instead of wholemeal wheat flour. I really like The Free From Fairy’s gluten free wholegrain flour.

Ten Variations on Rhubarb Crumble

At the start of the season, I always like to go for this basic rhubarb crumble recipe. There’s elegance in simplicity. And I really appreciate that lovely bracing fresh rhubarb flavour. However, when rhubarb becomes more abundant, I like to jazz it up a bit. So here are ten variations you can make to this classic rhubarb crumble if you so wish. You can also mix and match and use several of the variations in one dish. The permutations are endless.

Crunchy Top. Sprinkle a tablespoonful of demerara sugar over the top of the crumble prior to baking.

Ginger. The flavour of ginger pairs really well with rhubarb. You can do one of two things or even both. Chop some stem ginger and add it to the rhubarb along with some of the syrup. Or add some chopped crystallised ginger. If you prefer your ginger in the topping, then add a teaspoonful of ground ginger to the crumble ingredients.

Orange. Orange is another classic rhubarb partner. Squeeze the juice of the orange over the rhubarb before covering it with crumble. Then grate the zest into the crumble topping.

Strawberries. Rhubarb and strawberries isn’t an obvious pairing, but it’s an old one and a good one. Replace 100g of the rhubarb with strawberries.

Rose. Unless you’re a regular reader of Tin and Thyme, rhubarb and rose is a little known but effective partnership. I always use my homemade rose syrup, which is incredibly easy to make. But you can use rose water instead. If you use rose syrup, add two tablespoonfuls to the rhubarb prior to adding the crumble. But reduce the amount of sugar to 20g. For rose water, simply sprinkle a teaspoonful over the rhubarb.

Honey. Rhubarb and honey is another lovely combination, as I know from these rhubarb honey cakes. Just swap the sugar in the rhubarb part of the recipe for three tablespoons of honey.

Cardamom. Although many know about ginger, cardamom is another spice that complements the flavour of rhubarb. Cardamom is quite powerful, so it’s best to er on the side of caution. You can either add a ¼ of a teaspoon of ground cardamom to the rhubarb or to the crumble.

Nuts. Nuts are lovely in a crumble topping. You can either use ground nuts or chopped nuts. Swap 50g of the flour for ground nuts. Or just add 50g chopped nuts after you’ve rubbed the butter into the flour. Ground almonds or chopped walnuts are my favourite nuts to use.

Oats. The addition of rolled oats makes for a chewy crumble topping with a subtle oaty flavour. Use 25g less flour and stir the oats into the crumble after you’ve rubbed the butter into the flour.

Deconstructed Rhubarb Crumble. If you’re entertaining, you might want to serve something a little fancier than a humble crumble. Try roasted rhubarb with a crunchy topping tossed over the top. Cut the rhubarb into slim finger length batons. Sprinkle the sugar over the rhubarb and roast in the oven at 200℃ (400℉, Gas 6) for about ten minutes or until the rhubarb is soft, but still holding its shape.

For the crumble, use the recipe in this apple crumble and custard cakes. Bake on the lower shelf of the oven whilst the rhubarb is roasting. You’ll need to stir it about half way through to make sure it doesn’t burn. Alternatively use the “base” recipe in this apricot whisky honey cheesecake. Sprinkle over the rhubarb just before serving. Or you could allow guests to sprinkle it on for themselves.

Other Rhubarb Puddings and Dessert Recipes

Champagne syllabub with orange rhubarb compote

Mini chocolate & rhubarb pavlovas

Rhubarb & almond cream pasty pie

Rustic rhubarb galette with orange spelt flaky pastry

Waffles with rhubarb & rose compote & rose cream

White chocolate & rhubarb ice-cream (no churn)

And for even more rhubarb recipes take a look at my rhubarb category.

Keep in Touch

Thanks for visiting Tin and Thyme. If you make this traditional rhubarb crumble, I’d love to hear about it in the comments below. Do share photos on social media too and use the hashtag #tinandthyme, so I can spot them.

For more delicious and nutritious recipes, follow me on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram or Pinterest.

Rhubarb Crumble. PIN IT.

Classic Rhubarb Crumble – The Recipe

Classic Rhubarb Crumble

This recipe is for a basic rhubarb crumble and it's made with only four ingredients. But in case you want something a little fancier, you'll find ten easy ways to add variety and flavour in the blog post.

400 g trimmed rhubarb (6-8 sticks) ((14 oz))

40 g demerara sugar ((1½ oz))

120 g wholemeal flour ((4 oz))

60 g salted butter – cubed ((2 oz))

40 g golden caster sugar ((1½ oz))

Chop the rhubarb into 2 cm chunks and place into a greased ovenproof dish.

Sprinkle the demerara sugar over the top.

Place the flour and sugar into a large bowl. Then add the cold butter cubes. Rub between your fingers until the mixture resembles breadcrumbs.

Spoon the crumble over the rhubarb and bake in a preheated oven at 180℃ (350℉, Gas 4) for thirty minutes or so. The top should be golden and the rhubarb juices bubbling up around the edges.

Serve warm with custard, cream or ice-cream.

To make a vegan version, swap the butter for solid coconut oil or vegan butter.

For a gluten-free version, swap the wholemeal flour for gluten-free flour.

You can easily half or double the quantities of this crumble. You’ll need a bit less cooking time for a smaller crumble and about ten minutes more for a larger one.

Please note: calories and other nutritional information are per serving. They’re approximate and will depend on exact ingredients used.

Sharing

I’m sharing this simple rhubarb crumble with Lost In Food for #CookBlogShare.

Rhubarb Crumble – a Classic Dessert with Ten Variations One crumble recipe, eleven different desserts. This recipe for classic rhubarb crumble is made with only four ingredients.

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unwritrecipes · 4 years

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Some Ideas for Mother's Day 2020

Let’s talk Mother’s Day. For most of us, it’s going to look a lot different from years past. And while I don’t really care about the holiday per se (it’s actually always kind of seemed kind of fake and cheesy to me) I will miss getting to see ⅔ of my kids (the ⅓ daughter is at home, seemingly stuck with us forever, poor thing!) as well as the rest of my extended family, celebrating as we always have, with a brunch or barbecue and sometimes both!

This year it’ll have to be over Zoom or Facetime or maybe with a driveway chat, as we all stand 6 feet apart, but I still have a feeling that good food will play a major role, even if we can’t all consume it in the same space. So with that thought in mind, I put together a list of sweet treats, that practically any mom I know would love and a few thoughts for how to spoil the moms in your life, even with the social distancing.

While this new reality has brought about many, many negatives, there are some bright spots. In years past, I’ve emphatically told you not to attempt last minute foods on holidays, because they just don’t work well for large crowds. But this year, since we’re largely just cooking for our nearest and dearest shut-ins, they actually make sense! So bring on the pancakes, waffles and popovers, even if it’s just for yourself!

Another reason I’ve focused mainly on baked goodies here are because they are actually something you could stick in the mail and send to your mom or other loved ones (or hop into the car and deliver). You’ll see in the list below that I’ve noted the treats that I’ve already had good success with mailing as well as ones I think would travel well too.

**One note on shipping, it’s best to ship the day you bake, and you want whatever you made to be entirely cooled before you pack it, so plan accordingly!

So stock up on the butter, sugar and flour (but responsibly—no need to hoard) and let’s get into that baking-for-mom spirit!

BREAKFAST/BRUNCH

Who doesn’t like waking up to something special and decadent, made just for them?!! You could do a breakfast in bed or deliver a little treat to someone’s front door. Only your imagination’s the limit!

MUFFINS & SCONES

These are a natural and several of these would mail well. I probably wouldn’t mail scones though—they’re really best on the day you bake them.

Strawberry Rhubarb Muffins

Jammy Filled Corn Muffins

Double Chocolate Cherry Muffins (I’ve actually shipped these before and they work well, wrap individually)

Blueberry Streusel Muffins

Morning Power Muffins (these would ship well too, again wrap individually)

Blackberry Corn Muffins

Oatmeal Maple Scones

Blueberry Lemon Cornmeal Scones

Lemon-Currant Buttermilk Scones

PANCAKES, WAFFLES & OTHER BREAKFAST TREATS

These are all the last minute treats I wouldn’t normally make for a Mother’s Day brunch but which would work really well if you want to spoil your mom and she’s at home with you or lives nearby for a quickie drop off. Other than the granola, which ships fantastically well, I wouldn’t advise sending any of these.

Vanilla French Toast with Brown Sugar Cranberry Sauce

Lemon Ricotta Hotcakes with Fresh Blackberry Sauce

Whole Wheat Pancakes with Roasted Blueberry Sauce

Brown Sugar and Cinnamon Swirl Pancakes

Weekend Waffles

Chocolate Waffles

Sheet Pan Dutch Baby with Lemon Sugar

Popovers

Olive Oil Granola (this would ship well)

Creme Brulee Yogurt Parfaits

Breakfast Granola Fruit Tart

BREADS, BISCUITS & SPREADS

Bread (or biscuits) and jam are probably my most favorite breakfast—I’m sure you know a mom who would love a loaf of bread and/or a jar or two of jam!

Bittersweet Chocolate Bread (this would ship well)

No-Knead Everyday Brioche (I’ve shipped this and it works well)

Fresh Blueberry Brioche

English Muffin Bread (this would ship well too)

Dangerously Good Blueberry Bread

My Favorite Buttermilk Biscuits (you could prep these the night before and then just bake up in the morning)

Angel Biscuits

The Easiest and Most Delicious Raspberry Jam

Easy Blueberry Cinnamon Jam

Strawberry Vanilla Bean Jam

Homemade Lemon Curd

Desserts

Small Cakes—

Huge frosted layer cakes don’t ship well nor are they particularly good to have around when you can’t share—too, too tempting, so here’s a list of cakes that are on the simple, smaller side, some of which you can definitely mail.

Cornmeal Buttermilk Loaf Cake (This ships really well. Wrap in plastic wrap and then foil)

Irish Tea Cake (this would ship well too)

Olive Oil Lemon Bundt Cake (Not tiny, but this cake would ship well—it has a pretty long shelf life and it’s so, so good)

Blueberry Cornmeal Muffin Cake

Strawberry Buttermilk Cake

Triple Chocolate Snack Cake (I’ve never shipped this but I think it would ship well)

Fudgy Flourless Chocolate Cupcakes with Vanilla Bean Créme Fraiche Frosting (for the chocoholic mom)

Everyday Raspberry Buttermilk Cake

Chances are your mom has made you cookies at least once or twice in your life—what a delicious way to pay it back! Some of these cookies are more delicate or have a shorter shelf life so while they may be great gifts if hand delivered, I wouldn’t risk shipping them. The ones I indicated could definitely survive a trip through the mail.

Double Chocolate-Almond Biscotti (All of the biscotti would ship well)

Easy Lemon-Almond Biscotti

Jenny’s Lemon Cherry Biscotti

Whole Wheat Graham Jumbles (I’ve shipped these many times and they travel really well)

Brown Sugar Cookies

Lemon Cornmeal Cookies

British Wheatmeal Shortbread (these would ship well—all shortbread has a long shelf life)

Chocolate Chocolate Chip Espresso Cookies (these would ship well)

Chewy Double Chocolate Cherry Cookies (I’ve mailed these too)

Gluten-Free Brownie Cookies

World Peace Cookies

Almond Butter Chocolate Chip Cookies (these would ship well in a tin)

Chunky Chocolate Peanut Butter Cookies (these would ship well in a tin)

Vanilla-Bean Sugar Cookies (these would ship well)

Susie’s Maple Pecan Thins

Flat Chewy Heath Bar Chocolate Chunk Cookies

Lemon Poppyseed Shortbread (these would ship well too)

Classic Madelines

Bittersweet Chocolate Madelines

BARS

A lot of these recipes call for 9x13-inch pans which yield a large quantity. If you want to keep things on the small side, just cut the ingredients in half and bake in an 8x8 or 9x9-inch square baking dish.

Nutella Rice Krispies Treats

Strawberry Crumble Bars

Luscious Lemon Shortbread Bars

Annabel's Peanut Butter Blondies (these would mail well, individually wrapped)

Easy Toasted Coconut Key Lime Pie Bars

Supernatural Brownies (these would mail well, individually wrapped)

Midnight Milky Way Brownies (these would mail well, individually wrapped)

CANDY

Of course you could buy your mom a box of candy, but I’m betting you’d earn major points with one of these!

Easy Chocolate Raspberry Truffles

No-Bake Coconut Caramel Pecan Chews (these would ship well in an airtight tin)

And One More…

Individual Chocolate Souffles (the recipe makes about 10—if you prepare and chill these unbaked the day before, you could deliver to your mom and other loved ones complete with instructions on how to bake up whenever they like and even keep a couple for yourself!!)

Here’s to all the moms out there!!! Stay well and let someone spoil you for a change!! xoxo

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freshintentions · 4 years

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Need a Recipe?

This Thanksgiving was super exciting.

Like a brand-new puppy on Christmas morning kind of exciting. I know I know, you’re rolling your eyes, but Thanksgiving to me means spending time fine-tuning new recipes, which I get to share with friends and family. And what made it even more exciting were all the firsts this year. First time cooking in the new kitchen, first thanksgiving for my sister’s kids, first time we had friends feast around our dinner table together.

Because I’m still thinking about all the deliciousness (while simultaneous scouring Facebook marketplace for a used Kitchenaid), I wanted to share with you our recipes. I’ll preface by saying I eat only veggies and I have family members that are gluten-free, so I’ll also throw out some cooking variations.

Appetizers:

Winter squash galette. This was well worth every second of making it. The homemade bread put it over the top. I followed this recipe to the T, and made the dough the night before (keeping it in the fridge until ready to use). I used the delicata squash from our garden, and you’ll catch a theme with all the rest of the dishes too…

Spinach dip. I definitely took liberties with the recipe, adjust based on what’s in your pantry.

First Course:

Roasted Pumpkin Bisque With Pumpkin Seed Dukkah with rolls. If you’ve never cooked with sugar pie pumpkins, this is a great one to start with. This was a crowd fave on Thanksgiving. I baked the pumpkin the night before in the oven, so just had to throw it into the crockpot the day of (I doubled the amount of leeks it called for). Don’t know what Dukkah is? Neither did I until I made this, and it was such a unique addition.

Stuff Mushrooms, prepped the night before and popped in the over just 40 minutes before serving.

Lemony Green Salad with Radicchio & Pepitas, cause we needed something light right? We used some left-over mustard greens from the summer, and I added an Asian pear and watermelon radish for color, crunch and sweetness.

Main:

Kale Goat Cheese & Bow Tie Pasta. Bryan and I eat this, not going to lie, at least once a month. We had yet to share it with others, and thought this occasion would be perfect. We used GF noodles, and I’d recommend adding olive oil to the dish to keep the noodles tasty.

Roasted asparagus with lemony walnut crumble. Opps, I forgot to add the lemon and seasoning. Last dish to go on the table kind of problems. Also, we added beans to this mixture.

Creamy Roasted Fingerling Potatoes. Solid, go to seasonal side.

Miso Pot Pie. This was a fun one. And we had TONS of leftovers. Cooked with winter specific veggies like turnips, turnip greens and I added parsnip as well, the wine reduction is what helps turn the sweetness on this dish up a notch. For friendsgiving we added some chicken for our meat-eating friends.

Dessert:

Homemade Apple Pie. A friend’s grandmother’s recipe. We added a woven pie top before the streusel. This put to use all the apples I froze this summer (not nearly enough though!)

Strawberry rhubarb plum pie. Not going to lie, this wasn’t my favorite recipe as it calls for too much cheese. I’d recommend halfing it and cooking the fruit on the stove prior to adding to the dish. We did a second version of this in cupcake tins (minipies!) the second time and it was legit. Another fun one to use the rhubarb and plums I froze from the summer.

Here was the gluten free crust recipe I used. Make sure to use a gluten-free flour mix, not just pure gluten-free flour. You’ll need those binders. I used Bob’s Red Mill Paleo Baking Flour and it worked really well.

Here is the regular, non-gluten free crust I used. I watch a lot of cooking and baking shows. Guilty pleasure. But one of the shows recommended using shortening with butter, which this recipe calls for. They weren’t lying, it was legit. I used Crisco butter-flavored shortening and Bob’s Red Mill Organic Flour.

Where to shop:

I bought as many veggies as I could from the Milwaukee Winter Farmers Market. It was PACKED, but worth it considering all the mushrooms, onions and squashes I needed and the fact these farmers worked their butts of bring this food to our thanksgiving table.

Woodman’s for some great produce options (turnip greens anyone?) and affordable spices.

Costco for pre-made foods, like crackers and cheese, cause they know how to do apps!

Timing:

I prepped as much as I could the night before, mainly all the dough. Which gave me all day on Thanksgiving to actually cook everything. Timing worked out well, so if you have 2 days to cook, you should be able to knock out all the above recipes including shopping for ingredients and the random grocery store run for that stick of cream cheese you forgot!

Hope you get some inspiration for all those yummy veggies!

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thewildewoolf · 7 years

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annoyed at first sight: the saga

note: some salt for rachel @madcatassassin to keep you company on the plane. consider it the public declaration of love you asked for on twitter.

Lea was so, so, so annoying.

He'd thought he was making a good decision, for once, starting to come to the little café halfway between his apartment and the law firm. And then it turned out his next-door neighbor owned the place, and everything went downhill from there.

First things first, she was not a good neighbor.

She cooked at all hours, which was understandable, because she did run a café, but when you're cramming for the third exam in a row, you do not need somebody banging pots and pans and slamming cabinet doors and then making ridiculously delicious smells appear like spirits mocking all of his sad peanut-butter-and-nothing lunches. And then she took up the only elevator with her grocery runs, making him wait forever with his armloads of files and textbooks. Plus she sang in the shower, terribly, right next to his bedroom.

Secondly, going to her café was overall just a weird experience. She was so chipper in the mornings when she worked the register, which he considered an affront to anyone who, like himself, did not like mornings. It felt like a personal attack to have a blue-haired girl yelping "Hi! How are you? I'm fantastic!" in his face, when he barely felt alive. And okay, he'd gotten used to seeing Safiya Waheed, harpy editor of monster fashion magazine Sublimity, draped in her Hermés scarves and sipping veal bone broth in a china teacup, and he'd even gotten over seeing the leshy Rabbi Roland Gish stopping by for his daily breakfast-in-a-muffin and strawberry rhubarb salad to-go. Still he did not really like getting offered blood-red velvet milkshakes, or crybaby-back rib sandwiches.

("There isn't any human meat in any of our dishes," Lea had assured him. He was not quite so sure, still, because Arnold Gustavsson the ice giant really, really liked those crybaby-back ribs.)

He didn't understand why he kept going. Or why everything in him went electric when Lea was working front of the house.

It had nothing to do with how she seemed to smile with the entirety of her being, looking like summer itself in a sundress with a smear of flour on her cheek and wet strands of teal hair sticking to the side of her neck.

It was probably hatred.

Julius was so, so, so annoying.

It was awful to think badly of a customer, and ordinarily Lea would absolutely never, but he was also her neighbor, and that made things different.

Firstly, he stayed up just as late as she did, but he stayed up late studying instead of cooking, and apparently had to have absolute silence in the entire building or something when he studied. Yet he somehow was perfectly happy to rev up his motorcycle at any and all hours. There was no way she was the only one bothered about that, but no, she put up with it, but he complained all the time about the sounds of her cooking. She'd tried to smooth things over by showing up at his doorstep with some pastries, once.

It turned out he was allergic to them.

Or just to joy.

Secondly, he complained about the café. Granted, Buyan was a little eccentric, just like her. But he didn't have to tell her that her overnight oats looked like sludge in a to-go cup (even if they did–that was a very short phase), or tell her that the peanut-butter-celery tarts sounded disgusting (even if she had really not anticipated that sticky stringy texture), or make faces every time somebody ordered a blood-red velvet milkshake (those were actually really good, excuse him). It alienated other customers. Besides, last year during Ice Cream Flavor Fest, he'd come in and surveyed the list of flavors–it had been cereal themed last year, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch had been the top contender–and then ordered a plain vanilla after some particularly judgmental faces, and that meant he was really boring. And he was definitely a werewolf, but he never wanted to try any of her werewolf specials.

Also, Julius hadn't responded to her friend request on Snapchat, and then deleted his account three weeks later. And she couldn't find him on Instagram.

Which was a combination of rude and downright suspicious.

She didn't understand why he kept coming. Or why she couldn't stop looking towards the door every morning until he walked through it.

It had nothing to do with how he had the most thoughtful eyes of anyone she'd ever met, with his tie loosened and his cuffs rolled up to his elbows cramming for dear life at one of her tables while sloshing through his morning coffee.

It was probably hatred.

The thing about hatred is that over time, it needs fuel.

In which case, they had plenty, but most notable were two incidences in particular.

The Cabbage Incident

Julius was sick of eating ramen and peanut butter.

(Separately. Not together. Though once he had almost been tempted.)

He'd gone to the grocery store late at night after realizing he had been reading the same chapter in one of his many textbooks over and over again. He needed some kind of sustenance. Real sustenance. The kind that would make him feel more like a capable working adult with his life together, and only something green and leafy would do.

He was starting to feel better about himself, pushing his empty cart down the empty aisles, like a real person who ate real meals, until he caught sight of a familiar head of damp teal hair.

After many, many offerings of homemade mochis and her own specially mixed chili oil in mason jars, after so much begging, Lea had finally gotten Brandon's grandmother's secret recipe for lionhead soup, and she had to try it out immediately.

She would not be able to rest until she had.

And to do that she needed her own ground pork meatballs–a pinch to make, ever since that one exclusively handmade pasta phase she went through–and vermicelli noodles, and ginger, and sesame oil, and soy sauce.

Oh, and one head of Napa cabbage.

It was kind of a nuisance that it was the last one left, because it was not quite the perfect head of cabbage, but it was late and she would forgive this little grocery store because they were at least open. And it would do.

Until a tall shadow loomed overhead.

"Oh, um, hey, Lea. Um. I kinda need that cabbage."

"What? No. Julius, I need this cabbage. It's really important, haha."

"No, you don't understand. I really, really need that cabbage. Tonight."

"No, you don't understand. I really need this cabbage. Tonight."

"What do you need the cabbage for? It's not like you can use one head of cabbage to feed an entire café."

"I'm testing out recipes so I could potentially feed an entire café, okay? It's important! It's how I make my living!"

"You could cook something else! You have plenty of weird ideas all the time! You change your menus like every other day! I'm going to eat this cabbage for my actual meals. I am literally going to be living off of it."

"It's every other week, jackass! Which you would notice if you didn't spend all of your time judging everything in the place! Also, you could eat literally anything else!"

"Like what, like all the other things you could be cooking?"

"ATTENTION, ALL CUSTOMERS: WE ARE CLOSING IN FIVE MINUTES. THANK YOU FOR SHOPPING."

"Lea. That cabbage is so beat up. You don't want it."

"Then why would you want it?"

"I'm not testing out recipes! I'm just a poor law student. Your results are going to be skewed with this sad cabbage."

"It's fine! I'll get the basic idea and see if the recipe is easy enough to do on a large scale! I can perfect the taste later!"

"Much later, if those peanut-butter-and-celery tarts were anything to go by."

"Nobody forced you to buy one!"

"Yeah, um, you did."

"Yeah, obviously I did. How could I possibly force you to buy something?"

"You ... it was your face!"

"My face?!?"

"Ma'am. Sir. I'm afraid I'm going to have to escort you from our store for disturbing the other customers."

"WHAT OTHER CUSTOMERS?"

"SHE STARTED IT!"

The Not-Date Incident

There were a lot of things Julius hated about his workplace: the corruption, the astonishing amount of ignorance, and the strange animosity towards Starbucks, just to name a few.

Oh, and Kyle from upstairs.

Kyle, with his hand-tailored suits, his fraternity ring practically implanted into his finger, and his continuous bragging about that one time the Laurents had some issue arise while they were on vacation and had him specially flown to their lake house to discuss it. Luckily Kyle never spoke to him, because Kyle didn't know he existed, because Kyle didn't pay attention to anyone who couldn't potentially weigh in on his paycheck. Kyle only descended to their floor to request paperwork or something, but usually ended up boasting about starting to be assigned to some Laurent Industries property or something.

Normally when one of the Laurent Industries lackeys came down he tried to eavesdrop on their conversations, just to feel like he was making headway into his investigation on them. But he'd long since learned to tune out Kyle.

So when Kyle started yelping as usual about taking some café owner to dinner, complete with some jokes about sharp fangs and liking it rough, he completely ignored it.

There were a lot of things Lea was willing to risk for Buyan. The café was her dream-child, her personal project. She poured money and time and effort into it all the time.

She did not expect to be risking her dignity like this when she started it, though.

But she really needed Laurent Industries' sympathies and backing, especially as one of the few monster-serving cafés in this part of town, and especially because Buyan was new and still in need of some economic babysitting.

So when Kyle, her Laurent Industries representative who had the sex appeal of a moldy potato, asked her to dinner to discuss the property, she put on a cute blouse and a floral print skirt and let him take her to a nice Italian restaurant downtown.

It had not been his idea to go to Mangia's that night. He'd gotten a gift card from a coworker, and he'd done well on that torts midterm, and it was nice, okay, it was nice to have a real dinner for once. Sure, it was kind of weird to go to a restaurant that had clearly cornered the romantic Italian angle, with the soft dim golden lighting and violins playing gently, but he could handle it.

But then he looked over at the couple being seated next to him.

There was Kyle, atrocious salmon-colored bermuda shorts flashing in all of their hideous glory as he pulled out a chair for a woman who seemed bent on haunting Julius wherever he went.

“I meant to tell you earlier that you look beautiful tonight, Lea,” Kyle is saying.

Yeah. She does.

It should not interest her that Julius is at a relatively romantic Italian restaurant all by himself.

She should not be wondering whether or not it’s because he’s waiting on a date.

Kyle is talking about the time he saw the Laurents’ vacation home because of some pressing legal issue. At first she thought it would be a great opportunity to segue into them funding Buyan, but it becomes increasingly obvious Kyle is only really interested in talking about himself.

“No homo, but I definitely saw Damien and Elena lounging by the pool. It was like a GQ photoshoot over there.”

Lea stirs her ravioli – truffle oil, porcini mushrooms, some cheese that she is feeling way more chemistry with than Kyle – and definitely does not gaze over Kyle’s shoulder at Julius.

His date, if it is a date, has not arrived yet, and he's already received his entree. She wonders, as Kyle muses about Véra Laurent's supermodel past, if they're going to give him free dessert. If he was at Buyan, she would have.

Then again, she cannot really imagine anyone Julius would be having a date with at Buyan.

It was one thing to see Lea on a date. She had a life. It made sense that people should be interested in her. Not that he was, of course, but he could see why. It was just an entirely different thing to see her with Kyle, of all people.

He hadn’t even asked her about her café. Not once. Or anything else that she liked. Not even her food. The only sign of his remembering that he was supposed to be on a date was the occasional cheesy one-liner he tossed Lea’s way the same way he would toss a used toothpick.

Julius crumpled his linen napkin in his fist under the table.

She was trying. She really was. She listened to Kyle’s inane stories and made noises of awe or agreement when she was supposed to, and she patiently waited until finally, as the waiter was clearing their plates, she snapped.

“So, Kyle, this has been really nice, but about Buyan–”

“Oh my god,” Kyle burst out. “Do you never think about anything else? I mean, I’m breaking my back over here, pulling out all the stops, and you want to talk about your café?”

She froze. “I, um – excuse me?”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, Lea, but I’m trying really hard over here, but it’s hard to keep accommodating you. This is supposed to be a reciprocal arrangement, and if you’re putting in any effort, I can’t tell. I can’t. Lea, I think I’m going to leave.”

“What?”

He got out of his chair. People were starting to stare. Julius was most definitely in that number.

“Kyle, I, um –”

He held up a hand. “–Lea, you’re nice and all, but I can’t handle someone who is constantly thinking about their own interests.”

And then he just left. Walked right out, leaving her sputtering and presumably with their check.

She was trying to process what had just happened, when a voice piped up:

“Wow, you sure know how to pick ‘em.”

He had no idea why he said it. It just happened before he could stop himself.

In either which case, Lea whipped her gaze over at him, steely as only Lea could be in a floral print. “Excuse me?”

“I just meant –”

“Yeah, go ahead, share your enlightening commentary, Julius.”

“It’s just,” he said, plunging on despite her icy glare, “Kyle? Really? Of all people?”

“Wow, Julius. Wow. And here I was starting to feel sorry for you.”

He bristled. “Sorry for me? Why?”

“Gee, I wonder! Who’s the one sitting in a romantic restaurant all by themselves, so lonely that they have to listen in on somebody else’s dinner?”

“I didn’t have to listen in! That dinner was so agonizingly obnoxious, I’m surprised nobody else here said anything!”

“You,” she said, pointing, “have no right to sit there and judge me.”

“And you don’t have any right to point your finger at me.”

Lea rose out of her chair like – well, a kraken seemed an inappropriate simile, but it was what he thought of, when her chair scraped back and her skirt billowed with the motion. “Well, prepare yourself, because I’m about to point another one –”

“–Ma’am. Sir.” The manager, the maitre’d hovering at his side nervously, rushed to Lea’s side with some pretty spectacular timing. “I’m going to have to ask you to leave the restaurant. You are no longer welcome in this establishment.”

“I can’t believe you got us kicked out of one of the best Italian restaurants in town!”

Lea had to tilt her head to look up at him. “Right, like you had nothing to do with it.”

He stared straight ahead of them, gesturing to the rest of the parking lot. “I have a gift card! A gift card! What am I going to do with it now?”

“That’s what you’re worried about?” She meant to sound dry, and funny, but what happened instead was a snort. She coughed to cover it up. “You can use it on to-go.”

“It’s the principle that matters.”

Julius looked so emphatic, so serious, so hell-bent on glowering at that poor beat-up pickup truck in the corner, that she absolutely lost it.

“Stop laughing, it’s not funny,” Julius snapped impatiently when he turned around to find her, doubled-over in the parking lot.

“It – kind of – your face,” she gasped out between gales of laughter, hugging herself. “When the manager came –”

“Okay, that,” he couldn’t help the chuckle that bubbled up, because her giggles were infectious, “that was pretty good –”

“And Kyle’s shorts–”

“–Oh my god, I thought I was going to be blinded. I’m surprised you didn’t get kicked out right away for that.”

Lea covered her face with a groan. “That was the worst date of my life.”

She looked so almost-sad about that, or what he thought was sad, on Lea, anyway, because he’d never really seen her sad. He reached out to pat her on the shoulder and immediately thought better of it, jerking his hand away. “Hey, it’ll be okay. There’ll be better ones.”

“I hope so,” she replied, her voice dry as a bone.

“I think so,” he said, hands firmly in his pockets, trying not to sound hesitant. “I’m sure of it.”

She turned to him with a smile he couldn’t read. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Sure. Why not.

The next morning he came in for his normal coffee, and Lea made sure to be there.

“You know,” she said, writing his name on the cup with a flourish, “you’re not that bad.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Julius harrumphed. “Do you mean, not as bad as those peanut-butter celery tarts?”

#victoria writes #grandma it's me #otp: salt shakers

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