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yeowangies · 19 days

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mutual understanding

Chapter I: The butt of the joke | II | III | IV | V

PAIRING: Kenpachi/AFAB!Reader CONTENTS: AU - Fantasy, Medieval, Royalty, Arranged Marriage, Misunderstandings, Miscommunication, Pining, Explicit Sexual Content in later chapters. WARNING FOR THIS CHAPTER: None. WORDCOUNT: 3914

Summary:

Marrying a complete stranger was something you had come to terms years ago, but marrying Kenpachi Zaraki, out of all the possible options, was something you didn’t want to settle with. No matter that he had saved your life, you weren't going into the marriage happily, even more so, you were afraid he would be a brute in every aspect of the word.

To your own surprise, however, no one had ever treated you better.

Notes:

So uh. Hello. I started writing this a few months ago and I didn't think it'd be so long so, it's a kenpachi chaptered fic now lmao

This is heavily inspired by the webnovel 'under the oak tree', though only inspired. If any of you had read it, you'll notice the similarities and how small they are.

As a medieval au, I tried to write with a manner of speech according to it mainly for the reader character, but I might be a little stiff for that lmao

This will have smut (in the 3rd chapter if i calculated everything right), so if you're waiting for it, it's coming 💖 For now, this chapter works as an introduction and setting to the rest of the plot!

header by me, divider by @/benkeibear

You rolled your eyes, frustrated, as you waited in the corridor for your father to come out of his office, with a speech prepared in your head to dissuade him from making this arrangement happen.

Marrying a complete stranger was something you had come to terms years ago, but marrying Kenpachi Zaraki, out of all the possible options, was something you didn’t want to settle with. There was only so much you could do against such an union, but you had nothing to lose, so talking your father out of it was probably the last and only resort.

“Father,” You called out for him, loud enough to make him look at you once he walked out of the room. He only kept walking as you chased after him, holding onto your dress as each of your steps resonated in the hallway. “I beg of you, please do not let this union take place!”

“Why should I do such a thing?” He asked, voice cold, not even presenting you with a quick glance as he kept on walking.

“I do not wish to marry that man!”

“I am the one who decides who is to become your spouse, however.”

“I understand that, but please, I must insist!”

He came to a full stop once he reached the door towards the banquet hall, and you tried to catch your breath as he turned to look at you with a stern look.

“What do you have against him? Kenpachi Zaraki saved your life, if you must remember, my child.”

“I remember it perfectly well, but… giving him my hand in marriage as payment is atrocious to me, Father!”

“Surely you are not suggesting not to reward his actions.” He quirked an eyebrow in your direction. You knew you were testing your father’s patience at this point. “You are the princess of this kingdom, or have you forgotten?”

“His honorable actions deserve every reward possible, and we must not repair expenses if he demands food, or treasures, or perhaps a bigger fief than the one he already has. But, please, give him my life in exchange? You cannot be serious.”

“If I did not know you well enough, my child, I would assume you have a vendetta against him.”

“A vendetta!” You repeated, amused and exasperated at the same time, and you couldn’t help but raise your voice when you went on. “Father, he is a barbarian! He is violent and does not even seem to know any rules regarding etiquette!”

“Let me remind you that he is incredibly powerful too.” Your father said, as serious as always, not paying attention to any of your objections. “So powerful that even without belonging to a royal family, he has his own army. People who follow him, who are loyal to his physical strength and character. Kenpachi Zaraki would be a great ally to have if we ever have to face a conflict with our neighboring kingdoms, as it had happened in the past. And there is no safer place for you to be than with the strongest man in this land.”

The political agenda weighed heavily in this situation. You assumed that was the case, but you have just been explicitly told that was probably the main reason behind this marriage, and you couldn’t argue anymore. At a loss of words, you let your father turn to leave towards the banquet hall, sparing you a daring look before walking in.

You sighed, clenching your fists in defeat. No other argument you could have possibly said would change this predicament.

When you walked into the hall moments later, you were taken aback to see Kenpachi talking to your father, in the most casual manner.

“I do not need a wife.” Kenpachi said through gritted teeth, emphasizing every word with anger. “I don’t want one!”

“Do not be so unreasonable, Zaraki,” Your father replied dismissively. “You will need someone to care for your fief while you are away.”

You had to control the urge to roll your eyes this time.

“My people do that just fine!”

“It has already been arranged. I will not take any more objections. I am being more than lenient with you, Zaraki, considering your past activities, I am willing to overlook them for this union that will benefit us both.”

“I do not give a crap about that.” Kenpachi replied, low and intimidating, but you still couldn’t help but look at him with eyes wide open when he cursed like that so openly in front of you and the king.

Kenpachi clicked his tongue as he turned to leave, looking at you with a glare when he strode past you, and slamming the door shut. For such an antic complaint, you wondered why he didn’t stand his ground more, he certainly could if he truly didn’t want this union.

As much spunk you had in you to face situations like these, his size and imposing aura just left you breathless. You barely even reached his chest when he walked past you. You were terrified he might just accidentally kill you by simply putting a hand on you.

“Father, please, please!” You turned to your father with imploring eyes. “I beg you, do not let this happen!”

“My child, if you have any more objections, I would be glad to hear them, but you better have a spectacular argument.” He said to you, frustrated yet purposely mocking you.

“He is just… so old!”

You turned red when your father suddenly laughed.

“Oh, other royal men choose their spouse much, much younger than you, when they are even older than Zaraki himself!”

“I am well aware that it happens…”

You sighed again, completely given up, as you turned around.

The wedding ceremony took place almost two weeks later. Knowing what little you knew about Kenpachi, you were surprised he didn’t take off before the date.

He was cold during the service, and barely looked at you during the banquet. He must have hated this arrangement as much as you did or even more by the way he kept glaring at everyone who even tried to talk to him, and you were left in charge of exchanging niceties with the guest wishing you good luck in this new period of your life.

You couldn’t help but wonder constantly about what your father mentioned, even as you were in the middle of a ball with a room full of people. ‘Past activities’. Whatever did he mean by that? You knew your father merely saw you as a political tool, but you were concerned he had actually sold you to a man who could physically harm you.

It was inevitable not to dwell on that, especially as you were getting ready for the wedding night. With your maids trading comments about how happy they were that you were married, but concerned that Kenpachi was such a big man with such a stern expression, it was difficult to relax. Their worries had been your own for weeks, and it was only making it worse to hear other people comment on them. You kept your words to yourself however, not dismissing their conversation, as they brushed your hair and helped you change into your nightgown.

You weren’t clueless about what couples did in the intimacy of their bedrooms, but no matter how much you knew, you had never experienced it. It was almost impossible to hide your nerves; you only knew so much about this man, and what little you knew only made you more worried.

Kenpachi practically burst the door open, getting you out of your head and making you and your maids jump from surprise.

“Leave us.” He demanded, fixing his eyes on you as your servants scurried away.

You bit your lip, looking at Kenpachi with what little courage you had at that moment before standing up from the chair by the vanity. You had only seen him wearing different kinds of armors throughout his stay at the palace, but to see him in only a tunic and pants made you realize how muscular and thick he naturally was. His gaze was smoldering as you approached the bed, carefully lying on it as gracefully as you could, trying not to show how nervous you truly were. He was sitting on the bed in the blink of an eye, and you closed your eyes when you felt the mattress shift as he took off his tunic.

“Fucking unwilling women isn’t really my style.” He said, making you open your eyes to meet his briefly. “Do you want this or not?”

Apparently you were doing a terrible job at hiding your anxiety.

Looking at him when he was completely shirtless only distracted you more, and you swallowed loudly before attempting to speak, but only an unintelligible babble came out of your mouth. Kenpachi clicked his tongue, and when he averted his eyes, you feared he might walk out of the room. If he did, not only would the unconsummated marriage fall apart, but you’d be terribly and publicly humiliated.

When he brought his thumb to his lips, biting it hard enough to draw blood, you stared at him with eyes wide open. He let the blood drip onto the sheets in the middle of the bed before wiping off his finger, a crimson stain forming immediately. You were too confused to react when he reached for your nightgown, pulling it over your thighs before pinching the skin there, strong enough to make it hurt.

A loud squeak came from your mouth, and you instinctively swatted his hand away, sitting up and pulling back.

“Why did you do that?!” You asked, soothing your thigh with your hand over your gown.

“Why do you think?” Kenpachi replied with a smirk, entertained by your reaction. “That slap you gave me wasn’t so bad.”

“Well, you hurt me!”

“We’re even then.”

You looked at him, confused by his words, as he lay on the bed beside you, kicking off his boots.

It took you staring at the blood stain on the bed for a minute as you rubbed your thigh to fully understand what had just happened. A priest would come and check if the marriage had been consummated the next morning, and there was proof. The little yell you let out would convince anyone who might have been listening outside.

Kenpachi had just let you out of a situation you weren’t ready for, without even a second thought.

“Thank you.” You said softly, looking at him as he closed his eyes.

“Just go to sleep and let this day be over with.”

You hummed in agreement, relaxing even more when you noticed he wasn’t going to try and touch you at all. You lay beside him, taking a quick glance in his direction as you got comfortable, covering yourself with the blankets and turning to the side so as not to face him.

Leaving the palace you had grown up in was difficult but you knew it was coming as soon as the wedding ceremony was over.

The morning after the wedding night, your maids had already prepared most of your luggage, and by noon you were already on a carriage, on your way to Kenpachi Zaraki’s fief. Him and all his men traveled by horse, the only privilege of having a nice comfortable seat was given to you as the only woman.

You caught some topics of conversation here and there. How hilarious it was that Kenpachi had gotten a wife without even trying and your difference in age and size were the most common. It made you chuckle to even hear comparisons like ‘beauty and the beast’. But what got your attention the most was the name that occasionally popped up, ‘Yachiru’.

‘Yachiru was waiting for them.’ ‘One of the few times Yachiru did not accompany Kenpachi.’ ‘Yachiru must feel lonely all by herself in the castle.’

You were starting to wonder if maybe Kenpachi wasn’t as single as he seemed, and that’s why he refused to marry you initially. A woman waiting for him at his fief could only mean one thing, and anger bubbled up inside you. It wasn’t uncommon for men to have other women outside their marriage, but it was unfair that he had one while you were getting married.

“Why are you sulking?” Kenpachi asked you while you looked out the window, snapping you out of your thoughts.

“I am not doing such a thing.” You replied, even though you knew you were.

“We’ll get to my place by night, put up with it until then.”

His horse went up ahead as you stared at him, still surprised by his lack of finesse in his words.

True to them, however, you reached his fief after nightfall, when you were hungry, and most importantly, ready to sleep. You didn’t even have the energy to pay attention to your new home, though the darkness was making it difficult to even look at it in detail.

“Wait here, I’ll get food.” Kenpachi said once you were both in what would be your shared bedroom from then on.

The chamber was dark with a high ceiling, stone walls keeping the light away, with only one big window that made moonlight crept in. It was warm due to the fireplace, which you assumed the help probably started earlier. To your own surprise, it was spacious, with even an ample desk with a chair; and the bed was big enough to comfortably fit three people, with soft blankets and covers made out of fur.

It wasn’t the kind of room you expected from a man like Kenpachi.

When he came back a few moments later, carrying a tray with plates for the both of you, you practically gulped down everything on it as soon as you had it in your hands, forgetting about being polite and delicate for a second.

“So you can eat.” Kenpachi teased you with a smirk.

“I apologize,” You said with your mouth full, slowing down for only a second to drink water. “I was just famished.”

“Why are you saying sorry?” He asked, looking at you curiously. “You royals are too complicated. If you’re hungry, eat.”

“Truer words have never been spoken.” You replied, tasting the bread on the side, that was made recently, still warm and soft on the inside.

You didn’t exchange words while you both finished your meals, and you eyed him with intrigue every once in a while. Kenpachi seemed just as hungry as you were, swallowing down everything faster than you, and drinking what was probably wine from his cup. He lacked manners, you knew he did, but it only made the situation more endearing.

His lack of social graces made it difficult for you to like him at the beginning; he seemed aloof at best, or completely ill-mannered at worst. But maybe you had looked at him wrong. You’ll have the rest of your life to figure it out.

“Can I get a maid to help me get undressed?” You asked once he removed the plates from the bed.

“The maids are sleeping. I didn’t know you needed help for that.” Kenpachi stared at you blankly for a second too long and you inevitably blushed.

Ashamed, you remained quiet, avoiding his eyes. You didn’t want to ask for his help in removing your dress, but you couldn’t do it alone.

“Can you help me then, please?” You finally asked, looking at him with embarrassment.

His gaze remained on you, unfazed for a moment, before he nodded and gestured to you to come closer. You stood in front of him while he sat on the bed, and turned around, holding your hair back so he could see the back of your dress.

Kenpachi sighed loudly, and the feeling that you might be annoying him made you tense. He took his time, carefully undoing each button. You shrugged off your sleeves once he had reached the end, nervously holding onto the front of your dress. Before you could tell him to loosen the satin tapes of the corset underneath, he was already on it, hooking his fingers and undoing the knot before tugging softly at the tapes to open it up.

Your face was hot from embarrassment for having to ask for his help, for feeling like a bother in doing so, and for exposing yourself like this. You stepped away once he was done with the tapes, and while you held tightly onto your dress to prevent it from falling, you looked at him over your shoulder.

“Can you turn around, please?”

Raising a brow, Kenpachi eyed you up and down before getting up from the bed and turning towards the fireplace, keeping his back to you.

“I don’t even get why you’re making a fuss,” He said, removing his boots. “I saw you in your sleepwear yesterday.”

“It is not the same situation.” You replied quietly, as you quickly shrugged off your dress, letting it fall to your feet before shimmying your way out of your corset.

“What’s the difference? I’m gonna be seeing you undress for the rest of our lives.”

You gulped loudly, but didn’t reply.

Once you removed your bottoms, you were left in your tunic, tying the tapes in the front so no skin from your chest was visible.

“You can turn around now.”

When you looked at Kenpachi, his shirt was gone, and that only made your face blush harder. He scanned your shape with his eyes quickly before sighing, approaching the bed and lying down on it.

“Come on, let’s sleep, I’m beat.”

You nodded, though you didn’t think he even noticed, as he closed his eyes as soon as his head hit the pillow.

Sliding on the opposite side, you covered yourself with the blankets, and turned to your side, your back to him like the night before.

“Good night.” You whispered quietly, and closed your eyes.

When you woke up the next day, the sun was already high up, and Kenpachi seemed to have woken up a long time ago by how cold the side of the bed was. You took the opportunity to explore your new home as soon as you finished breakfast, and it amazed you how enormous the castle truly was.

Its design on the inside reminded you of a fortress, with a lot of long corridors and rooms that would make anyone lose themselves in there if they were to go deeper. Or perhaps it was just you; the castle was mostly made of stone with only a few windows, and every corner looked exactly the same. Completely different from the palace you used to live in that had tall windows with luxurious decorations and items in every wall. It would take some getting used to living in such a place, but you really couldn’t complain about it; it was still a big castle that offered you comfort and security.

As you headed downstairs to explore the outside, you stopped in your tracks when you heard some maids talking to each other as they passed by.

“Yachiru was her usual cheerful self now that Sir Zaraki was back.”

You frowned as you kept walking, offended that everyone in the castle seemed to know that your brand new husband had another woman. One that had been with him long before you knew it.

You didn’t really care if Kenpachi had other women, you even expected it since he didn’t have any intention to marry you in the first place. But you hoped he was at least careful about it so the entire world wouldn’t find out. Apparently it was a little too late for that.

The garden left a lot to be desired. As you walked through it, overgrown grass and weed invaded most of it, and even the trail was uneven. While you headed towards the training grounds, you already decided to ask Kenpachi for permission to fix it.

The training area was spacious, and currently occupied by almost every boisterous soldier Kenpachi had under his command. Dust flew in the air as they yelled and exchanged sword blows, blood occasionally splattering on the ground, and you stood, mesmerized by how eager to fight these men were. Violence only attracted more violence, and there was the proof that Kenpachi Zaraki only attracted more people who were exactly the way he was.

But you were shocked to your core when you saw a little girl in the middle of it all, her pretty pink hair contrasting the atmosphere and uniforms of all the men.

“What are you doing here?”

You jumped when you heard Kenpachi’s voice beside you, and he stared at you, impassive, when you turned to him.

“I-I was just… getting to know this place.” You replied nervously. “What is that child doing there?”

“Training.”

“W-What? She is only a child!”

“And she’s stronger than most men here.” Kenpachi replied, staring at her as she swung her sword like she was playing with it.

“Whose daughter is she?”

“Mine.”

You inevitably choked on your own saliva when you heard him and started coughing, loud enough that almost every man present turned to you, which only made blood travel to your face faster. Most of them bowed to you, but you could barely acknowledge them as you tried to recover.

A daughter? At this point you were convinced you were the butt of the joke.

Kenpachi was staring at you between curious and amused, but he remained quiet.

“W-When were you planning on telling me that?” You asked him once you regained your composure, covering your mouth with your hand.

“Tell you what?”

“That you have children!”

“Oh.” Kenpachi said, as if it was the most boring thing you could be talking about, and it only made anger start to bubble inside you. “She’s not actually mine.”

“What?”

“I found her in the woods when she was a baby and took her in.”

“Oh…” You whispered, extremely embarrassed about the situation. “What is her name?”

“Yachiru.”

It all made sense then.

You let out a sigh you didn’t know you were holding, and stared at the group of men in front of you, who still had their eyes on you. Ashamed of introducing yourself in such circumstances, you bowed as you said your name quickly before making a quick exit and turning back to the castle.

You knew you would have to socialize with Kenpachi’s army of men sooner or later, but you were still embarrassed they saw you red as a tomato and sputtering nonsense, so you ended up having dinner in your room.

“Did you stay here all day?” Kenpachi asked when he walked in at night, making you jump slightly. You still couldn’t really get used to his loud gruff voice.

“Not precisely.” You replied, eying him from the bed as he took off his boots. “I explored the rest of the castle before returning here.”

He only grunted in acknowledgement before removing his shirt and eyepatch, and you averted your eyes quickly, trying not to stare at him. However, when he took a clean shirt and walked towards the door, you couldn’t help but look at him, alarmed that he was leaving.

“I’m going to sleep in another room,” Kenpachi turned to look at you with his usual hardened expression. “You stay here.”

You couldn’t even let out a single protest as he walked out the door.

#kenpachi x you #kenpachi x reader #kenpachi zaraki x reader #bleach smut #kenpachi smut #bleach fics #bleach imagines #my writing

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lilydalexf · 6 months

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hi! do you know of any fics where mulder or scully (i think this fits either of them well) ask the other "can i kiss you?" ? its my favourite fic "trope" but i think ive only found one xf fic that does it and i cant even remember it, please help!

Thank you for this ask! I have (many) older asks I maybe should've answered first, but it was very fun compiling this rec list of fics where one of Mulder and Scully asks the other "Can I kiss you?" Enjoy! Anamorphosis by Megan Reilly Assigned to find a horrifying serial murderer, Agent Scully discovers things about herself and her past that she never suspected. City of Light by Bonetree On the run through the American Southwest, Scully and Mulder flee the shadowy forces of Owen Curran and Padden's government agents, who threaten their freedom and their lives. On the way, they must also struggle with their own demons, which threaten to tear them apart. (Part of the Goshen universe) Eleventh Hour by Rachel Anton Some feeling defy the confines of time. Fumbling Towards Ecstasy by Jenna Tooms Scully comes to Mulder with a wound only he can heal. general conundrums by @intrepidment Nonsense fluff. Impulse by Suzanne Schramm Mulder and Scully investigate some strange doings in a little town where people seem to have no control over their actions. Let's Bee Together by @baronessblixen Set during IWTB: Scully comes home from the hospital to find a bored and restless Mulder has picked up an interesting new hobby: apiculture. Little Notes by aRcaDIaNFall$ Mulder and Scully are bored in a meeting and start passing notes... The Mad Physicist & The Lab Rat by littlemisfit5290 (@alittlemissfit) "Who said I was even going to the party?” “I said you are if you plan on knowing whether I dressed up as a sexy alien or that beast woman.” MSR, pre IWTB, Halloween fluff. The Most Wonderful Time of the Year by Baroness_Blixen (@baronessblixen) For the first time ever, the FBI is doing a secret Santa exchange. But what do you do when you're not paired with the only person you can imagine exchanging gifts with? You do everything in your power to rig the game. Nuptiae Sub Rosa by SisterSpooky1013 and XFMaweezy (@sisterspooky1013 and @xfmaweezy) A series of canon-compliant missing scenes showing that some dynamics of Mulder and Scully’s relationship may have changed much earlier than previously thought. radiant by kittenscully (@kittenscully) Under normal circumstances, her vulnerability would shock him. But things are different now, the shift tectonic and undeniable. He owes her the same trust that she’s showing him. Saying the Words by Karen Rasch Mulder and Scully finally confront their feelings for the first time. (Part of the Words series) Tender Intent by A.I. Irving When Scully returns to work after recovering from her illness, Mulder discovers that she isn't quite the changed woman she claims to be. Untitled by @baronessblixen “I’ll kick his ass if you want me to.” / “Why do you only kiss me when I’m sleeping?” Untitled by @broadcastnews1987 a “what if one breath never happened au.” Untitled by @msrafterdark scully puts the moves on mulder post-millennium. What Happens In Vegas (Sometimes Finds Its Way Into Official Documents) by tiredmoonlight (@myshipsintheharbor) When some interesting news about the marital status of two agents finds its way to back to the FBI, questions are raised, the main one being that the agents don't actually remember getting married. While You Were Sleeping by Skinfull Mulder falls for an intoxicating red head he spots in the park, then saves her life but not before she is injured and put into a coma, then he meets her sister! Den den dehhhhhh! Seraphim by chekcough (@chekcough) After Mulder returns from the dead, Scully tries to pick up the pieces. AU, with Mulder/Scully relationship pre-established after FTF. Implied character suicide.

#fic rec #roundup #xfiles fanfic #xf fanfic #anon #asks

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mi-rae07 · 2 months

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Jung Wooyoung : As Good As You Were (Part 3/4)

Pairing : Jung Woo-Young (Ateez) and named character (Shin Naeun)

__________________________

Wooyoung was now helping the workers wheel naeun to the ICU, a doctor emerging from a room as she looked at naeun worriedly before muttering

??? : naeun.

Wooyoung looked at the unknown doctor in part shock as he asked

Wooyoung : how do you know my wife?

??? : she's my patient.

Wooyoung paused on his tracks as naeun was wheeled into the room, the nurses shutting the ICU doors in wooyoung's face as he let out a shaky breath. He felt tears in his eyes as he fell back against a nearby chair, his hands shaking in fear and worry. Her patient? Patient for what? Why hadn't naeun told wooyoung anything about this?

Wooyoung hoped it was just a minor inconvenience that could be solved quickly so they could go back to normal. It had to, right? The world couldn't be so cruel to wooyoung so as to take naeun away from him?

___________________________

The world was cruel after all.

??? : your wife has brain tumor, and it was already too late to be removed completely from her brain by the time we figured it out. That was probably why she didn't want to tell you, there was nothing anyone could do except wallow in their own despair from this news. Naeun-shi has maybe, another month or so left to live. After that the tumor would affect her brain activity, and that in turn will inevitably lead to death. I am so sorry, sir.

Wooyoung stared at naeun who was now sleeping on the hospital bed, an IV attatched to her wrist as the heart monitor beeped in regular intervals of time. Her heart, that beep, wooyoung couldn't believe it would last only for a month now. And naeun had known, she'd known all of this and she hadn't told him. He had dreamed of an entire life with her and now, now it was all gone.

Wooyoung still had tears streaming down his eyes, he just couldn't bother enough to wipe it away. He felt naeun shuffling against the sheets as she slowly opened her eyes, looking up at wooyoung as she whispered groggily

Naeun : w-woo?

Wooyoung : I hate you, you know that? I hate you so much I wish-I wish I could burn the entire world down.

Naeun looked around the room as her eyes widened, finally getting what had happened as she quickly sat up on the bed. Wooyoung sniffled, his shoulders trembling as he asked

Wooyoung : when did you know?

Naeun : wooyoung please-

Wooyoung : no more lies, naeun.

Naeun : the day before we went on that trip.

Wooyoung's face contorted as he tried his best to not let out a sob, shaking his head as he asked

Wooyoung : is that why you rushed the trip? And…and momo, that was…is that why you wanted to take her home so bad?

Naeun lowered her eyes as she felt the tears well up in them before saying shakily

Naeun : you said you wanted a family with me, and kids I cannot give you. So I thought-

Wooyoung : naeun do you think that a cat, or even a mere-a mere child can replace what you are to me? The…part that you hold in my life?

Naeun : wooyoung I have no choice.

Wooyoung : this is all my fault, I should've known-

Wooyoung cut himself off with a sob as he rested his forehead against naeun's lap. She could do nothing but cry in silence as wooyoung said

Wooyoung : all that while in the-in the trip I was doing everything with you thinking we could do this again one day when we…when we got older. And you, you were doing it all knowing it would be your last.

Naeun shut her eyes tightly as wooyoung cried against her lap desperately, shaking his head as he said

Wooyoung : you never should've married me, you should've married someone who could've treated you with love and care from the very beginning. Not four months before you…god!

Naeun : wooyoung don't say that, you've made me happy-

Wooyoung : happy for what, 3 months? After you spent 3 years being alone despite having a husband, despite having saved my family? I should be the one dying! I should've been the one on that bed not you! You've done nothing wrong-

Wooyoung cut himself off as the door opened, revealing wooyoung's mom with tears in her eyes as she said

Mrs jung : naeun-ah.

Naeun : e-eomma.

Wooyoung quickly stood up as he walked past his mother, heading out the room as he heard naeun call his name out. But he didn't respond back, how could he? How could he when his entire world was being taken away from him only a few months after he'd gotten it.

How could he when he never treated her right and now she was dying, and they had too less time.

__________________________

Wonjeong knew her son, she knew he would never forgive himself for this. Especially after what naeun had told him, that wooyoung had finally started treating her right. She knew this would happen someday, she just didn't think it would be too soon.

Wonjeong was now walking through the hospital gardens, hoping to find wooyoung somewhere. And soon she heard the desperate cries and wails of a man, knowing it was her son's as she walked towards it. She saw wooyoung crouched down on the grass, his head on his hands and his cries filling the garden. It hurt her soul, hearing her son cry like this.

Wonjeong : wooyoung-ah.

Wooyoung turned to look at his mother, his face red and damp with all the tears. He looked horrible, god wonjeong wished she could help her son.

Wooyoung : e-eomma. Eomma naeun she-she said she's going to leave me.

Wooyoung let out a sob as wonjeong shook her head, rushing up to wooyoung before hugging him. Wooyoung cried against her shoulder, wonjeong feeling her eyes tear up at how hurt wooyoung sounded. He'd never cried like this, not even when his father had forbidden him to continue his dreams.

His life had always been so unfair.

Wooyoung : this is all my fault eomma, it is all my fault I'm so sorry. I should've listened, I should've loved her when I could. And now…now I can't.

Wooyoung weeped harder against his mother's shoulder as he remembered what she'd told him months ago.

"One day, you'll lose her and you'll regret everything. And then you'll come to me, crying and begging for the forgiveness that is not mine to give"

Wooyoung shut his eyes tightly as his mother said

Wonjeong : sometimes life is unfair to us, wooyoung-ah. Naeun might…she might have to go soon but she'll never leave you, son. She loves you, even after she's gone she'll stay in your heart and your memories, forever.

Wooyoung : I don't want a life without her, eomma. I…I don't know how I could live without her.

Wonjeong closed her eyes, her owns tears sliding past her cheeks as she whispered

Wonjeong : you'll have to learn, my son.

___________________________

Naeun had been sitting against the hospital bed for some time now, wooyoung's mother already having said her goodbyes for the night. And yet wooyoung was nowhere to be found. She was just about to get up from her bed when the door opened, a drenched wooyoung stepping inside the room as naeun's eyes widened

Naeun : were you out in the rain?

Wooyoung said nothing as he closed the door behind him, sitting on the chair beside naeun as she said

Naeun : god, I'll go grab a towel for you. You're going to catch a cold otherwise.

Naeun quickly got off the bed before finding a towel nearby and going up to wooyoung, wiping his wet hair hastily as wooyoung whispered

Wooyoung : would this be the first and last time you ever dry my hair, naeun?

Naeun closed her eyes as she removed the towel from his hair, throwing it on the bed before saying

Naeun : wooyoung, we still have a month left.

Wooyoung scoffed as he said

Wooyoung : a month, 30 days? I wanted 30 years with you, naeun, not 30 fucking days.

Naeun : I'm sorry.

Wooyoung : what if I die with you?

Naeun's heart froze at those words

Naeun : what?

Wooyoung : what if I kill myself the day you die, hmm? Then we can be together again-

Wooyoung cut himself off as naeun slapped him, his head tilting to the side as she said in a shaky voice

Naeun : don't you dare. For all that you have done in the past I have forgiven you, wooyoung. But if you do this, then I will never forgive you. In this world, or the next, if you do anything to harm yourself after I'm gone, I'll never forgive you.

Wooyoung closed his eyes, lowering his head as he said nothing to that. Naeun stared at wooyoung for a while, not knowing what to say either. Then she held his cheeks, lifting his head up to face hers as she said

Naeun : I love you, wooyoung, I love you so much I cannot imagine if something would happen to you even after I'm gone. I can't bear the thought of you being hurt-

Wooyoung : and yet I have to see you hurt, see you die, see all my dreams with you get destroyed within barely a month. If you cannot bear the thought of seeing me hurt…

Wooyoung looked up at naeun with his teary eyes, the look on his face making naeun want to do anything to live, anything to stay. But she knew she couldn't. tears streamed down wooyoung's cheek as he said in an utterly broken voice

Wooyoung : then how can I see you die, naeun.

____________________

Wooyoung was now driving back to their penthouse with naeun just staring at him from the passenger's, not having said a word after they entered the car. Wooyoung had woke up today pretending as if yesterday hadn't happened. The doctors had told them there was nothing they could do so it would be better if naeun got discharged and spent the last few weeks of her life doing things she wanted to do. Wooyoung had just signed the papers and gotten naeun to leave.

He had smiled at her, smiled as if she wasn't sick and going to die. Naeun couldn't say that she didn't like it, it felt better when wooyoung didn't treat her as a patient.

Wooyoung : we're going to the beach today after this. So once we reach home and have breakfast, we'll go there.

Naeun : okay.

Wooyoung turned to look at naeun due to the one word answer as he asked

Wooyoung : why, do you not want to go?

Naeun : no no. Of course I do, anywhere I go with you is fine for me.

Wooyoung smiled as he turned back to face the road, one of his free hand coming up to coil around naeun's as she smiled, holding her husband's hand with both of hers. She liked this, and she wanted to feel this as much as possible. It could be her last time feeling it after all.

______________________________

Naeun was now smiling as she felt the waves crash against her feet, the sky above her slightly cloudy and not too sunny. Perfect for a beach date. Wooyoung was just watching her from the side, a smile on his face as naeun picked up water with her hands and threw it up.

She looked so beautiful, wooyoung had thought, and so he'd taken a million pictures of her within the past few minutes, the wind blowing her hair back and the light making her skin glow. She looked like an angel, the kind that made you forget about all your sins.

And then wooyoung remembered, it had been his passion to take photos, and yet he'd taken none of his wives. He had taken a lot when they'd gone out for the trip but now he was going to take it every time naeun did something, special or not.

Naeun : young-ah! Aren't you coming!

Wooyoung smiled and nodded before putting the phone back in his pocket, walking up to naeun as she held his hands before dragging him into the water as well. Wooyoung grimaced as he felt the waves crash against his feet, filling it with mud instantly.

Naeun : isn't it so much fun!

Wooyoung : ew, the sand's making me feel kinda thrown off.

Naeun : really?

Wooyoung : mhmm.

Naeun let out a mischievous smile as she suddenly threw beach water at wooyoung's face, making him scream as she ran away from him as fast as she could.

Wooyoung : MY FLAWLESS SKIN NO!

Naeun laughed as wooyoung started running after her, the water splashing against their feets as he caught up to her and picked her up. Naeun squealed as wooyoung rubbed his nose against her, smearing the beach water on her face as well as naeun rolled her eyes before saying

Naeun : you're stupid.

Wooyoung : but you love this stupid man.

Naeun giggled as she leaned forward, kissing wooyoung as she rested her palm against his damp cheek. And to the onlookers they looked like the most carefree couple ever, not a single problem plaguing their relationship.

Only they knew that this was another one of their lasts too.

_______________________________

A week later :

Naeun was now sitting with her head rested against the penthouse glass window that overlooked the city below them, wooyoung humming some music as he cooked dinner for them a few meters away from naeun. This entire week they had spent going around Seoul, even having gone to Jeju for a few days as a trip. Naeun had only ever visited that place for office deals, but wooyoung had shown her around the entire place within the span of 5 days, and he had booked another trip to Daegu for day after.

Naeun's eyes widened as a raindrop fell against the window, followed by another raindrop as the city soon disappeared under her due to the rain. She stood up from her seat, an excited smile on her face as she called out to wooyoung

Naeun : woo!

Wooyoung : yes I know it's raining. And momo get off the damned counter, you brat!

Naeun giggled as she said

Naeun : I'm going to the balcony.

Wooyoung : what!

Naeun didn't wait for a response as she rushed towards the nearby balcony, stepping outside as the cold rain suddenly hit her, drenching her hair and clothes. Naeun smiled as she closed her eyes, feeling the rain on her body. She had always loved the rain, and that was because of her parents. Because they'd bring her out with them when it rained and would play some nice music, the three of them dancing until they got tired and cold. It had been decades since she'd danced in the rain with anyone, and she missed it.

Naeun opened her eyes as she heard her favorite jazz music being played from inside the penthouse, the sound loud enough for her to hear clearly despite the rain. Was she dreaming this?

Naeun looked to the door as she saw wooyoung stepping into the balcony with a smile, walking closer to naeun as he bowed before holding his hand out for her to hold

Wooyoung : may I have this dance with you, my lady?

Naeun chuckled in disbelief, holding wooyoung's hand as she said

Naeun : but you hate the rain.

Wooyoung : but you love it, and I love you.

Naeun smiled as wooyoung stepped backward before stepping back in, holding his palm against naeun's as he walked in a circle around naeun who giggled before asking

Naeun : you know how to dance?

Wooyoung : I am a man of many talents, mrs shin.

Naeun giggled as wooyoung twirled her around, holding her by the waist right after before bringing her close again, their bodies following the romantic rhythm of the music.

Naeun : how did you know I liked this song?

Wooyoung : I heard you listening to it a year ago. And, you had this specifically be played at our wedding. This was the song we danced to on our wedding for the first time, remember?

Naeun remembered, and for them to be doing this again for the last time, the rain pouring down on them, naeun wouldn't have given this up for the world.

Wooyoung : I never told you then, but I thought you looked beautiful in that wedding dress.

Naeun felt tears prick her eyes as wooyoung twirled her around again, bringing them farther away from each other as naeun quickly blinked her tears away. As the music got faster wooyoung brought her closer to him again, whispering to her

Wooyoung : I wish we could do that all over again, marry each other again, so I could treat you as the bride you deserved to be treated as.

Naeun closed her eyes in pain as wooyoung lifted her up, spinning her around in his arms just the way he had done at their wedding 3 years ago. Except now he was looking up at her with love, so much love that it made naeun's heart well up in joy and pain. Joy of having found someone like him, and pain of having to leave someone like him behind.

The music slowly faded as wooyoung brought her slightly down, still looking up at her as he whispered

Wooyoung : let me do what I should've done years ago.

Naeun closed her eyes as wooyoung kissed her, their tears mixing with each other and the rain as naeun wrapped her arms around wooyoung's neck. And they soon felt desperation and need take over them, wooyoung carrying naeun to their bedroom as her hands worked on wooyoung's shirt buttons to remove them hastily.

And just like that, as the rain drops fell against the frosted glass windows of the couple's penthouse, their bodies joined to become one. As it was meant to be.

_______________________________

A week later :

Naeun was now playing around with momo as wooyoung set up the picnic mat at the park, the puppy running to get the ball naeun had just thrown before rushing back to her with it in momo's mouth as she chuckled and patted her head.

Wooyoung eyed them as he said

Wooyoung : she seems to like you. Whenever I come close to her she just bites me.

Naeun giggled as she picked momo up, her licking naeun's face making wooyoung rolled his eyes before saying

Wooyoung : only I'm allowed to do that though.

Naeun gasped as she whacked wooyoung's arm, making him giggle as he finally sat on the mat before putting out all the food for lunch in front of him. Naeun hummed as she sat beside him, momo cuddled up in her arms as she said

Naeun : ooh it looks very yummy.

Wooyoung : yes obviously, I made it after all.

Naeun : it suddenly looks very disgusting.

Wooyoung : okay then don't eat.

Naeun : actually nevermind I'll have it cuz you made it and I love you.

Wooyoung : totally not cuz it's delicious.

Naeun : definitely not.

Wooyoung smiled as he picked up a piece of sushi before feeding it to naeun, her humming as she mumbled

Naeun : heavenly.

Wooyoung : thank you, finally the appreciation I deserve!

Naeun giggled as momo opened her mouth as well, staring at wooyoung with eyes that said 'feed me too' as he sighed and gave the puppy a sushi as well. She seemed to like it as much as naeun.

Naeun let out a satisfied breath as she rested her head against wooyoung's shoulder, smiling as she patted momo before saying

Naeun : I wanted to come here one day with you and our kids.

Wooyoung pressed his lips together, naeun eyeing the family that was having another picnic a few meters away from them, the kids running around their parents as they laughed at their children's smiles.

Wooyoung : naeun-ah.

Naeun : I'm sorry I can't give that to you. If only I had more than a year left to live, I could've at least given you a child, an heir-

Wooyoung : I don't care about any of that. I'd rather not raise a child without it's mother to love them, it would be torture to have someone that keeps reminding me that if you were here, we could've brought them up together. It's either with you, or nothing darling.

Naeun smiled as she looked up at wooyoung, him kissing her forehead as he whispered

Wooyoung : you're all I need and want.

_____________________________

1 week later :

Today was naeun's last day at work, except no one other than naeun and wooyoung knew it. Naeun got sicker as days passed, and she knew that the rest of her last week in this world would have to be spent at her penthouse. And that was where she preffered to spend it, she'd rather she spent her last few days with her husband than at work.

She just wanted to feel all this one last time, this company that had been passed onto her by her parents, something that had been in her family for years. The work that accompanied her when she had no one, what helped her drown her feelings in. It had been the second most rewarding thing in her life, apart from wooyoung.

Mina : boss? You called me?

Naeun : oh, yes. I have something for you.

Mina frowned as she closed the door behind her, walking towards naeun as she stood up before handing over a bunch of keys to mina. Mina eyed it in confusion before asking

Mina : do you…do you want me to send your cars for cleaning, boss?

Naeun chuckled, shaking her head as she said

Naeun : those are the keys to a new house, a house that I have bought for you near the Han river. It'll make a beautiful home for your husband and you, and your newborn soon.

Mina's hands instinctively went to her stomach, her eyes widening as she asked

Mina : ma'am…how-how did you know?

Naeun smiled, patting mina's shoulder as she said

Naeun : consider it a gift from me for your services this past decade. And the other key, is for your new car. It's a Range Rover, I heard it was your favorite car.

Mina sobbed in gratitude as she hugged naeun, making her smile as she wrapped her arm around her secretary

Mina : thank you so much boss! I don't know…I don't know how I could repay you for all this.

Naeun : you don't have to, it's my gift mina.

Mina : you can be my son's godmother then, would you mind that? Being the first one to hold my baby after my husband and I?

Naeun bit her lips to prevent her tears, wishing she could do that. If only she lived long enough. Naeun pulled back as she smiled and said to mina

Naeun : of course. It's just that, if for some reason I am not able to attend it, would you let wooyoung be his godfather instead? Let him hold your son in my stead?

Mina : of course! I'm sure you'll be there but if by any case you aren't, then I wouldn't mind sir doing it either.

Naeun smiled and nodded, patting mina's back one last time before saying

Naeun : thank you, mina, for everything.

_________________________

Wonjeong : naeun-ah! I didn't expect you to come today. Is wooyoung not with you?

Naeun : he isn't, I just wanted to talk to you alone for some time.

Wonjeong : sure sure. Come in, the maids have made lunch. You can have that and go as well.

Naeun smiled and nodded as she stepped in, following her mother-in-law to the living room as she sat down on the sofa opposite wonjeong's.

Wonjeong : what did you want to tell me then, naeun-ah?

Naeun : it's about…wooyoung. As you know, eomma, I only have a week left to live. And after that, my company has to go to someone. And I wish for that someone to be wooyoung.

Wonjeong : oh, naeun-ah.

Naeun : I have written a will, it's in my office desk. If I told wooyoung this I know he would never let anyone take it, he finds himself unworthy to take my company as his. But it is my wish that he has it, as he is the man I love, and my husband. So after I'm gone, if you can, I want you to take the will and bring it to action. Wooyoung will only ever listen to you in this matter, eomma.

Wonjeong stood up as she sat next to naeun, taking her hand in hers as she smiled and said

Wonjeong : I will do that for you, I promise.

Naeun smiled and nodded before continuing with a shaky voice

Naeun : and um, after I'm gone, there would be no one left to really take care of wooyoung. I know it is too much to ask of you but if you could just make sure he's healthy, and happy. I just love him so much and I wish I could stay and take care of him but I can't…

Naeun trailed off as she shut her eyes, tears flowing down as wonjeong shook her head and hugged naeun. Naeun sobbed against her mother-in-law's shoulder as she said in a broken voice

Naeun : please take care of him for me eomma, please.

Wonjeong : of course I will take care of him for you, naeun-ah. I'll make sure he always remembers that you loved him, and always will even if it's not from this world.

Naeun nodded, knowing this would be the last time she'd get to hug her mother-in-law as she sniffled before whispering

Naeun : thank you so much, eomma.

Wonjeong smiled, wiping her own tears as she pulled back and held naeun's cheek before saying

Wonjeong : you're the best thing that's ever happened to my son, naeun, I hope you'll always remember that.

______________________________

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cartoonrival · 3 days

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ive talked about this one million times but heres my canon compliant timeline between the end of shippuden and the start of boruto

sasuke leaves on his shit trip because he thinks its a trip for atonement and in order for it to count as atoning naruto can't come with him, since atoning is something you're supposed to do solo and is synonymous with suffering. if naruto comes with him he won't be suffering.

naruto is not in love with sakura anymore

hinata is still in love with naruto

naruto isn't really doing anything. he feels sort of aimless. he still wants to become hokage obviously but he's not chasing sasuke anymore and since sasuke is technically "saved" he doesn't really know why it still feels like there's a hole in his chest. kakashi is hokage right now anyways. so in the meantime he'll just train and help rebuild/reconnect. iruka forces him to study.

hinata gathers the courage to ask him out. he's flattered, and says sure because she's nice and she wants to, and he doesn't think he DOESN'T want to, so .. sure. ok

hinata and naruto are dating. this is fine i guess. people seem happy for them, and hinata seems happy so he supposes he must be happy too. sasuke is fine. they exchange letters, but the turnaround is slow. naruto keeps all the letters he gets from sasuke but he isn't really sure why he's doing it. sasuke's fine now!

hinata proposes. naruto is flattered, and says sure because she's sweet and she's nice to spend time with. if she wants to, sure. everyone is really excited and happy for them. he figures marriage must feel like less of a big deal when its yours than when its someone elses.

he sends a letter to sasuke saying that he's getting married. he didn't really tell sasuke that much about his relationship with hinata, which wasn't exactly a conscious decision, there was just other stuff he'd rather be telling sasuke about.

sasuke sends back a letter that says nothing other than "CONGRATULATIONS" in big text. he isn't at the wedding, even though naruto told him when it would be. that's fine, he's busy. he's fine now, he's allowed to be busy. he's bettering himself and it's gonna be good for him. naruto wonders what it would've been like if sasuke was there, and he tries to pretend he's not scanning the crowd for him during the whole event. kissing hinata has the same emotional impact as giving a high five. why do people make such a big deal out of this sort of thing?

sakura has been talking for a while about how she misses sasuke. she and naruto both feel a little lost without building their lives around his rescue.

sakura gets restless and frustrated very quickly when she doesn't have something she feels like she's working towards or something to structure her life around. she decides its been long enough. she wants to bring sasuke home.

naruto wants to come with her, but sakura tells him he's married now, and he should stay home with hinata. this seems like it makes sense, and both of them believe it, so he does. sasuke's fine anyways. the letters are spaced further apart.

sakura finds sasuke outside the land of fire based on information from kakashi. he's surprised to see her, and doesn't tell her to leave, because despite everything she represents a piece of home that doesn't hate him. they don't really have a lot in common, but they both represent something that the other can't get back.

sakura confesses for the same reason she always does, which is because she wants something that doesn't exist but she's hoping that she can lie to herself that it does, and sasuke remembers naruto and hinata and says "okay" even though he doesn't really remember telling his mouth to say that word

when sarada is born, sakura convinces him to come with her back to konoha. out on the road is no way to raise a child anyways, and he's not so stupid that he doesn't know this, so he says okay, and he comes back to konoha even though walking through the village feels like being stripped naked over and over

naruto has a kid now too, with a stupid name. he looks just like his dad, and sasuke doesn't even mind holding him.

being back in konoha makes sasuke want to rip out his hair. he feels suffocated, and no one who glances at him on the street is too shy to remind him that being forgiven by naruto will never mean forgiveness from the rest of the world.

at the very first sign of a chance to leave konoha, he takes it, and he leaves without saying goodbye. he tells himself it's because the mission is time sensitive, but he still has time to see naruto before he goes. he decides that sakura is better with kids anyways. she's always taken care of sarada more than he did, mostly because he strayed from home as much as possible

10 or so years pass, boruto begins

#txt157 #nrto #naruto #boruto

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c0rinarii · 2 months

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WELL! I have just concluded the game that i bought on impulse bc i was hyperfixating on some of the characters (guess who!). I have A LOT of thoughts, but i'll start with some nutshell character thoughts and pairing shenanigains. Spoilers below!

That 4th tier deserves a bit of elaboration

Juro: He is, at his core, a blank sheet of paper. A mild sandwich with no seasoning. And I like how this game handled that fact bc he was someone more prior to this, but he's given a new personality so he can rest from being so self-sacrificing (if he's anything like the juro izumi from 2 loops ago). He's in the "they're there" tier for a special reason, bc he's kind of meant to be just There.

Renya: Despite being there just to help the audience answer some questions regarding the fucked up narrative of the story, I think what gives him a leg up from the "They're there" tier is his lowkey hilarious relationship with Ryoko. He is perplexed and lowkey salty about how short their relationship lasted no matter how hard he tries. He tries to not gaf as much as Ryoko does but he still does. Ei calls him out on this. Its so so funny.

Megumi: HER NARRATIVE ON GRIEF WAS VERY WELL DONE and if it werent for the spaghetti bullshit of an ending the epilogue was, I would be soooo so intrested how she'd handle moving on from Izumi. I find the concept of Juro/Megumi much more bearable with Juro now having one sided feelings for Megumi while Megumi considers giving him a chance or not. That wouldve been a great closing to their relationship instead of. just getting toghether with no qualms! yeah juro i totally wasnt mouring a dead version of you in that simulation. lets kiss.

Miyuki: I KNEW YOU COULD SAVE THOSE KIDS WITHOUT INFLICTING SEVERE TRAUMA. Sadly aside from "saviour from above" themeing with her, theres nothing much outside of that. While im greatful she was there, she is just there in the end. But her efforts give her a leg up from that tier.

Chihiro: The concept of a very peeved elderly woman stuck in a pre-schoolers body is a funny one and im just extremely glad that 13SAR is not big enough that sobposters arent using her at large to fufill their degen fantasies. Aside from that shtick though, nothing else. Thats literally a baby

Moving onto the canon main pairings!:

I saw someone calling HijiOki queer-bait and i can kindaaaa see why when basing it off the epilogue. Yeah they havent seem to progress much past 5 years and are at best still at talking stage while some of the others are literally married with kids (oh i'll get to that.) But I like to see it as the only pairing with realistic progression past. everything thats happened. Aside that they're just very funny!! Love their dynamic, will be rooting for them no matter how long it takes.

I did not expect myself to like SekiFuyu this much!! I do agree that Iori ESPECIALLY deserves more story outside hanging with gals and crushing over Sekigahara (not to say i didnt like it!!), but im very glad that the story subverted my expectations! I want them to be happy first and foremost, but i feel like the added angst from Iori realisng that she was a clone of THE Chihiro Morimura wouldve made this ship just a little bit more peak. Aside that, I support Iori shoujoisms and Sekigahara finding love and happiness.

I think my rating on Nentomi will change the more I ruminate on it. MeguJuro would be bumped up above RenRyo IF they didnt immediately fall in love after those 5 years and have Megumi still "thinking about it" while Juro goes "pleaaase :(" bc i think Megumi deserves to tease him a lil and think more about What the hell happened. ShuuYuki is the worst case of comphet between a lesbian and a looser bisexual ive seen.

Now.... the elephant in the room.

Ive talked to moots about how much i abhored the ending at first. Aside from the Darling in the Franxx-esque cop out, you expect me to believe that some of them just. got toghether after everything?? without any processing of What The Hell just happened?? nothing at all?? god

Im not the one to usually complain about comphet bc yeah its something i hate, but it usually doesnt sour my experience of consuming media so much. But god this is where its one of the main reasons why an ending is ruined for me. I hate hate HATED some of the epilogue scenes, esp with Nentomi and Shuuyuki bc of the straight people "my wife sucks but i love her" humour it radiates. ugh.

I would've loved a much more... bleak? more bittersweet?? outlook on the situation? after realisng everything is not real and you are basically the 15 adam and eves left to recreate human civilzation... that would be a pretty fucking huge thing to grapple with. I just wished that they had more complexity with this ending. Or! just stick with the fact that they're forever trapped in space colonies left to deal with the horrors of their situations and the mistakes of those in the past. Sorry for bring a tragic yuri enjoyer, but the overbearing dread and loom from the simulation story was what really made me intrested in 13SAR. To see it just solve itself with little drawback was so lame.

I read the George Kamitani aimed for 13SAR to have a mecha and shoujo hybrid story. While that's honestly an awesome concept, im sad it means that he can miss out on more complexity when intepretting the narrative when it comes to certain relationships (shoujos can be complex too!) I also heard that the game was meant to be at least 3 times longer that it is curently which is. wow. Its a shame that so much content got cut out 😭 bc i feel like a bit more time with these characters is all i need to make my verdict more positive.

As a bonus, i'll include a crackship tierlist too! Alot has changed

I miiight need another few days or even weeks to compile another thoughts post bc theres definitely more things i wanna talk about (the narrative structure, Tamao, 2188 theories, themes of japanese imperialism-). But so far, im gonna let it ruminate for a bit before picking it back up to analyse

#i will give 13SAR this. nevet has a game made me think this hard about lore so far #it was engaging at least. i have to respect that #13 sentinels: aegis rim #13 sentinels #13 sentinels spoilers #corr.txt

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jackoshadows · 2 years

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Q: What is your favorite line you’ve ever written?

A: “I certainly like ‘Stick ‘em with the pointy end.’ - GRRM

So here are all the times GRRM’s favorite line he has ever written shows up over 5 books:

“You’ll have to work at it every day.” He put the sword in her hands, showed her how to hold it, and stepped back. “How does it feel? Do you like the balance?”

“I think so,” Arya said.

“First lesson,” Jon said. “Stick them with the pointy end.” - Jon II, AGoT

-----

“She was,” Eddard Stark agreed, “beautiful, and willful, and dead before her time.” He lifted the sword, held it out between them. “Arya, what did you think to do with this … Needle? Who did you hope to skewer? Your sister? Septa Mordane? Do you know the first thing about sword fighting?”

All she could think of was the lesson Jon had given her. “Stick them with the pointy end,” she blurted out.

Her father snorted back laughter. “That is the essence of it, I suppose.” - Arya II, AGoT

-----

Everything Syrio Forel had ever taught her vanished in a heartbeat. In that instant of sudden terror, the only lesson Arya could remember was the one Jon Snow had given her, the very first.

She stuck him with the pointy end, driving the blade upward with a wild, hysterical strength. - Arya IV, AGoT

-----

She stood on the end of the dock, pale and goosefleshed and shivering in the fog. In her hand, Needle seemed to whisper to her. Stick them with the pointy end, it said, and, don’t tell Sansa! Mikken’s mark was on the blade. It’s just a sword. If she needed a sword, there were a hundred under the temple. Needle was too small to be a proper sword, it was hardly more than a toy. She’d been a stupid little girl when Jon had it made for her. “It’s just a sword,” she said, aloud this time . . . . . . but it wasn’t. - Arya II, AFfc

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Jon felt as stiff as a man of sixty years. Dark dreams, he thought, and guilt. His thoughts kept returning to Arya. There is no way I can help her. I put all kin aside when I said my words. If one of my men told me his sister was in peril, I would tell him that was no concern of his. Once a man had said the words his blood was black. Black as a bastard’s heart. He’d had Mikken make a sword for Arya once, a bravo’s blade, made small to fit her hand. Needle. He wondered if she still had it. Stick them with the pointy end, he’d told her, but if she tried to stick the Bastard, it could mean her life. -

“Snow,” muttered Lord Mormont’s raven. “Snow, snow.” - Jon VI, ADwD

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It had been so long since he had last seen Arya. What would shelook like now? Would he even know her? Arya Underfoot. Her face was always dirty. Would she still have that little sword he’d had Mikken forge for her? Stick them with the pointy end, he’d told her. Wisdom for her wedding night if half of what he heard of Ramsay Snow was true. Bring her home, Mance. I saved your son from Melisandre, and now I am about to save four thousand of your free folk. You owe me this one little girl. - Jon XI, ADwD

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Jon fell to his knees. He found the dagger’s hilt and wrenched it free. In the cold night air the wound was smoking. “Ghost,” he whispered. Pain washed over him. Stick them with the pointy end. When the third dagger took him between the shoulder blades, he gave a grunt and fell face-first into the snow. He never felt the fourth knife. Only the cold …- Jon XIII, ADwD

The phrase is first introduced in Jon’s POV chapter when he gifts Needle to Arya and gives her the first lesson. From there, it pops up in Arya POV chapters. It’s there, whispering in her mind when she hides Needle and stops being Arya Stark. Jon Snow picks back up on the phrase, when he worries for Arya married to Ramsay Bolton. It’s his last thought as he dies.

I suspect, with Jon now dead and most probably spending time in a wolf, and Needle making a subtle appearance in Arya’s TWoW sample chapter, the next time ‘Stick them with the pointy end’ shows up on the page will be in an Arya POV chapter, where she reclaims her identity and heads to Westeros.

Maybe after Arya hears what happened to the black bastard at the wall, stabbed to death by mutineers....

He is a man of the Night's Watch, she thought, as he sang about some stupid lady throwing herself off some stupid tower because her stupid prince was dead. The lady should go kill the ones who killed her prince. - Cat of the Canals, AFfC

#Jon Snow #Arya Stark #Needleheartwinter #Needle #Stick them with the pointy end #GRRM

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soupdeewoop · 2 months

Text

favorite lines from "THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT"

your wife waters flowers, i want to kill her

All my mornings are monday stuck in an endless february

but you're in self-sabotage mode, throwing spikes down the road

we're modern idiots

You smoked then ate seven bars of chocolate

i scratch your head, you fall asleep, like a tattooed golden retriever

sometimes i wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me, but you told lucy you'd kill yourself if I ever leave

'cause it fit too right, puzzle pieces in the dead of night, I shouldve known it was a matter of time

'cause i knew too much, there was danger in the heat of my touch, he saw forever so he smashed it up

did you really beam me up?, in a cloud of sparkling dust, just to do experiments on, tell me I was the chosen one, showed me that this world is bigger than us, then sent me back where I came from

now im down bad crying at the gym, everything comes out teenage petulance, "fuck it if I cant have him", "I might just die, it would make no difference"

how dare you think its romantic, leaving me safe and stranded

my spine split from carrying us up to the hill, wet through my clothes, weary bones caught the chill

thinking how much sad did you think I had, did you think I had in me? oh the tragedy

i stopped cpr, after all its no use

two graves, one gun, ill find someone

you swore that you loved me, but where were the clues? i died on the alter waiting for the proof

i just learned these people try and save you 'cause they hate you

id rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitchin' and moanin', ill tell you something 'bout my good name, its mine along with all the disgrace, I don't cater to all these vipers dressed in empire's clothing

there's a lot of people in town that I bestow upon my fakest smiles

my friends tried, but i wouldn't hear it, watched me daily disappearing, for just one glimse of his smile

another summer, taking cover, rolling thunder, he doesnt understand me, splintered back in winter, silent dinners, bitter, he was with her in dreams

little did you know you home's really only a town youre just a guest in

florida, is one hell of a drug, florida, can I use you up?

little did you know your home's really only the town youll get arrested, so pack your life away just to wait out the shitstorm back in texas

i need to forget, so take me to florida, ive got some regrets, ill bury them in florida, tell me I'm despicable, say its unforgivable, at least the dolls are beautiful, fuck me up, florida

go on, fuck me up

this cage was once just fine, am i allowed to cry?

what if hes written "mine" on my upper thigh only in my mind?

these fatal fantasie given way to laboured breath taking all of me, weve already done in my head

what if the way you hold me is actually whats holy?

they dont know how youve haunted me so stunningly, i choose you and me, religiously

if you wanted me dead you shouldve just said

crash the party like a record crash as i scream, "whos afraid of little old me?", you should be

i wanna snarl and show you just how disturbed this has made me, you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me

you caged me and then you called me crazy, i am what i am 'cause you trained me, so whos afraid of me?

they shake their heads saying, "god, help her" when i tell 'em hes my man

ill show you heaven if youll be an angel, all mine

whoa, maybe i cant

i thought i was better safe than starry-eyed

if you know it in one glimpse, its legendary, you and i go from one kiss to getting married

you shit-talked me under the table, talking rings and talking cradles, i wish i could unrecall, how we almost had it all

youre the loss of my life

the lights refract sequin stars off her silhouette every night, i can show you lies

'cause im a real tough kid, i can handle my shit, they said "babe, you gotta fake it till you make it" and i did

lights, camera, bitch, smile, even when you wanna die

im so depressed, i act like its my birthday everday

'cause im miserable (haha), and nobody even knows, try and come for my job

and i dont even want you back, i just want to know, if rusting my sparking summer was the goal

you didnt measure up in any measure of a man

in fifty years will all this be declassifed?, and ill say, "good riddance"

i wouldve died for youre sins, instead i just died inside

so when i touch down, call the amateurs and cut 'em from the team

'cause the sign on your heart said its still reserved for me, honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?

he jokes that "its heroin, but this time with an E"

you look like clara bow

this town is fake but youre the real thing, breath of fresh ait through smoke rings

the crowd goes wild at her fingertip, half moon shine, a full eclipse

youre the new god were worshipping, promise to be dazzling

beauty is a beast that roars down on all fours demanding more

you look like taylor swift, in this light, were loving it, youve got edge, she never did, the futures bright, dazzling

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pikaflute · 1 year

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sam and max 001 :^))

smiling and giggling. this got long because of autism.

when I started shipping it if I did

i think like. legally if you play the telltale games or consume any sam and max media youre required to think they're a old married couple. it's the law. i also thought they were gay when my tumblr mutuals put sam and max gay comps and art on my dash for many years. and shoutout to that one person who put max's penis on my dashboard too.

and special shout out to my friend teddy for getting me into these games we're going to be fighting in gladiatorial combat but like we'll be kissing while we do so.

my thoughts

theyre going to hell. like for real. do you know how much time i've spent thinking about them these past two months. like. i have a 6000+ word fic still brewing, two wips of ideas that i will probably not finish, and two google docs of headcanons for them. and my THREE playlists for them. here they are btw:

general s&m playlist - he let me hit cause i'm goofy as hell

sam playlist - look at my detective dawg, he's doomed by the narrative

max playlist - UNIDENTIFIED THING! BLOW IT UP NOW!!!

i have also spent so much on those sam and max figurines and the max plush. we're all lucky i haven't found keychains or pins yet to make an itabag. joking. maybe. anyway they're very cute and special to me. i love them so much and i love the way they love. im throwing pipe bombs at them

What makes me happy about them

i love the way they love. seriously, i read the comics over the weekend and they were very funny and very cute together. that whole road trip they took together was so adorable. i also love their interactions in hit the road. the lousy golfer bit is the most married they've ever been in my mind.

i just love couples who have been together for so long that their love language is funny banter. there's a part in 303 where sam finds max's brain and they immediately get into an argument because max was too loud. keep in mind sam just went through all the stops and was so broken up about losing max but they still have time to do this. in 304 before max turns into a monster he fucks with sam. it's really funny.

love them so much. sam throwing max out a window is a declaration of love to me.

What makes me sad about them

im under the impression that telltale games still needs to be tried in court for episode 305. like treason. TREASON. anyway post 305, they're together again (yay) but things have to be different right. like this new max does things differently than what our max did and it's making sam question if this is right. like is this really helping him let go of max? also he feels like if he gets close to this max he'll end up losing him again as he did everything he could to save max but it ended up failing at every step of the way.

meanwhile max is bottling everything up inside because he doesn't want to think about it. when he does eventually think about it, he feels awful and feels like he killed sam and is now thinking whether or not if he should stay to not allow sam to feel anymore miserable about losing max. he doesn't want to hurt sam anymore and will sacrifice his own happiness by being with sam to do that.

anyway that fic should be done soon. looking at you autistically

things done in fanfic that annoys me

surprisingly: ive only read like two sam and max fanfics (that were about them specifically, i read my lovely friend teddy's stuff because we're soul bonded) and one of them is my own draft. i think just in general, they should already be married in the fic. like even post 305 they should like get married again. sam and max have been married ever since max got one of those spider rings from sam at age 5.

things I look for in fanfic

i think they should be annoying. and in love. that's it. actually also give sam a hug max, please. please he needs a hug after the shit in season 3.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other

i'm under the impression that they need to be a couple or else. like the world is going to collapse if they don't get hitched 50 times. also i don't think anyone else is right for them besides each other.

but. i have an image for this. do you get it. walk with me.

My happily ever after for them

not living in new york for one. but seriously, i think a lot of people imagine them retiring at some point, but honestly i think they would be freelance police until the end. they just love to do what they do: sam because he loves to be a detective and be with max and max because he loves to be the "long arm of the law" aka shoot people and be with sam. when they do die they're gonna terrorize hell too. you will never separate them ever again.

if they ever retire however, they are living in new jersey for my sake. i hate new york.

who is the big spoon/little spoon

"oh wouldnt sam be the big spoon because hes like 6 feet?" yeah but max is like a cunt. he tries spooning sam and sam lets him because he's a) tired and b) doesn't want to get bit right now. half way through the night sam either rolls onto max or max wants to be cuddled instead and max tries to get sam to change positions and wake up and sam ignores him because he knew this was going to happen because it happens literally every night.

what is their favorite non-sexual activity

throwing rocks at each other. but also i think they really like doing any silly shit together. watching movies together but making fun of them. playing poker and max shooting the cards when he loses (which is often). them playing video games together and max breaking his controller because he lost (also happens often). them goofing off on cases. going to a diner for dinner and annoying everyone there. they just love to spend time together with one another. its so cute.

#sam and max #I LOVE GAY PEOPLE!!!!!

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favoringeyes · 1 year

Note

talk about ayano idc what I LOVE HER!!!!!

oh god ayano. lately ive been going super crazy over her idrk why. ayano. i love ayano's irony as an entire character and her place in kagepro in general. like despite being such an important figure in the mekatrio's AND yuukei quartet's lives for a lot of kagepro's story she's simply only a memory. for example in the novels specifically we dont get her pov once if i remember correctly and the only way we can piece together her character is through flashbacks from characters like shintaro, takane, and kano. which i definitely think is done on purpose. because it's not supposed to be a good thing that she did what she did. love that she's a subversion of what a heroine is supposed to be, a figure who sacrificed herself for the greater good and saved her loved ones, but instead her suicide does nothing but make things worse. but it's what ayano believed she had to do, bc she doesnt see any worth in herself or her feelings. her entire worth is based upon whether she can hold up to the standards she puts herself against. she wants to be mature and strong. she thinks she's weak and hates herself for it, i mean even right before she killed herself she apologized to kano for not being as brave as she thought bc she was scared to go through with her plan. till the very end ayano believed she was a coward and it makes me insane bc her actions r the very opposite of what a coward would do. she tried to fight alone, to be the hero she wished she was, because she didnt know she already was a hero to her family. my little daze is so good for ayano's character because her reaching out to shintaro was one of the few times she allowed herself to be selfish and push for something she wanted. what she truly wanted at first from shintaro was some sort of answer, she idolized him bc he was everything she was not. ayano and shintaro meeting is consistently a catalyst for the start of some form of change in their lives and ouhhh it makes me sooo crazy! another thing that makes me crazy is how ayano is basically destined to always fail no matter what she does. ayaki tried to take direct action in killing marry but it results in the loss of her family and then ayano tried to take indirect action and it results in the loss of her place in the narrative and it's so insane how she can literally never win. she's constantly punished by the story in some way be it complete erasure or loss of the most important people in her life. either way love ayano so much i think she's one of the most fascinating characters in kagepro simply bc shes a rejection of the tragic heroine trope. she learns that her worth isnt on whether or not she is a hero or not, that she isnt supposed to fight alone bc there's people that care for her and want to help her. she probably definitely needs therapy. still. love you ayano 🥀 look at her beautifulness

#mail #upvote

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recovery-within-the-iris · 2 years

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Shout out to that time when i just completed the main dawnguard mission and needed a pick me up because the vale is pretty but SUPER LONG AND IRRITATING so i decided to go to the nearby orc stronghold, brawl the chief and marry one of the chiefs daughters, Borgakh the Steel Heart and she was excited to leave with me. So excited that for some reason, she said i do and turned and left the temple of mara before my little argonian nerd man could answer yeah or nay or marriage. Then i got nervous, rushed the ceremony and tried to follow her outside cause she didnt ask where she could go live and when i looked at the dispersing crowd of loved ones, she was fucking no where. So now im running around to all my houses; shes not at vindrell hall, shes not a breezehome, shes not at honeyside and by this point,i dont have the home from windhelm or solitude. Ik i have a modded in castle house(cause i need the space, this is an archival run) so maybe the a.i got confused and went there. Nope. Shes not at dragonblood castle. Idk where my wife went.

So i say fuck it and assume maybe she went back to her stronghold and i still have to pay her dowry. As i arrive, its night time and dark asf. I have no follower but im just here to check for wife. No wife, infact, nobody is here other than her mom. So i sigh and start looking up what could of happend online. I see something that says that a glitch can occur where they leave(this has NEVER happened to me before and ive married easily on all 3 of my previous playthroughs) and it might be fixed if you wait outside the temple for a day and then re-enter.

As im about to fast travel from an area next to solitude(farthest northwest of the large map) alllll the way back to riften(farthest southeast of the large map) i get taken out of my map to my horse next to me freaking out and in cheeky little white writing at the top left of my screen, a tiny little message pops up " you can not fast travel with enemies near by". Im sorry WHAT?? I look up and cinamatically captured by my camera angle, i see an elder dragon, blowing a stomache full of fire, swoop over the orc stronghold that singularly holds my new wife's father, grandmother and mother.

So yeah.. I fight and kill the dragon. Im lvl 42 by this point, dragons dont really phase me much. Are they scary and big? Yes but not something i couldnt handle with a couple of iron arrows, 5 poisons and good aim. I see arrows that arnt mine being shot at the dragon while i kill it and i see my new mother in law running into the longhouse of the stronghold after its dead so i just assume, everything is alright. Dragon's dead, i saved my in laws but i still cant find my fuckin wife. So i follow what the guide says and fast travel to riften.

I choose to appear infront of the gates of riften instead of the much closer jarls house thing because i just got a bunch of Dragon bones and scales, im overencumbered, i wanna make some money. As im about to start walking and turn to go to the pawned prawn, shit you not, up comes padding the fucking courier. See, awhile back, i started the portion of the white phial mission and (spoilers) ive been waiting for neurelion to just die already so i can get the phial. I assume "finally! I can get the phial!" Nope. The courier tells me i have some inheritance, sorry for your loss, leaves. Now im abit sad, cause see i assume its one of the beggars in the game as i like to walk up and give them the gold everytime im in town. I have an absurd amount of gold so i dont really mind. However, if the beggar dies in the game, they can give you the inheritance. I was sad cause i like the beggar characters and it'll suck to go to a shopping district without paying them a visit.

As im reading through the inheritance letter thing, i notice the name is not one i recognize. Its chief ka-something. Im thinking " who tf is that?" Then it hits me. The orc stonghold that just got attacked, my new wife is the daughter of the chief... Did my father in law just die?? I didnt see his body?? So i say fuck this shit and fast travel right back to the stronghold. Im looking around and i see the mom up and walking around and as i turn the cornor of the fence, in typical skyrim fashion, theres dead grandma all proped up on her knees and leaning back like shes about to do a sick slide. Then i glance to my right and right infront of the door to the long house is, shit you not, the body of my missing wife's dad.

I may get too much into character when i play skyrim cause all i can imagen is that this orc stronghold was peachy till this hot shot little nerdy argonian boy came trottn in. He arm wrestled the chief and offered to marry his daughter so he could get the resources and she could get her freedom. Everything is fine until after the wedding and suddenly their daughter fuckin gose missing after silently leaving her own ceremony. The family just returns the stronghold confused and late that night, the new son in law pops up just outside the gate and peaks in then looks like hes about to leave before, what they can only assume, is the boy's pissed dragon-uncle, comes swooping in and kills their leader and matriarch. The boy kills the dragon then just fucking leaves without saying anything. They file the death. The chief wanted somethin to be left for his daughter's new non-traditional family so 100g gets drained from the bank account. Then a day later he shows up and starts standing over the corpses looking incredibly confused.

Oh and to top it all off, just when i was about to go back and try the waiting outside thing, my game crashes :) everything resets to the moment i finished the dawnguard mission. I have never met my wife or this family i brought dragony harm upon and ive elected to take that as a sign that perhaps i am not to marry that orc woman and will infact, never return to their stronghold again :)

Is ok, my character has known and interacted with Vivienne from solitude more so now i get rp as my guy building a house for them(windsetd) and everyone around them knowing my guy has a massive crush and will propose anyday and they knkw because hes been around the potion shop more often and hes been buying ALOT of building materials suddenly :)

He(i) also got to directly save her from a dragon attack by killing a dragon that was in the shopping district of solitude. :) i cant wait to marry those two

#skyrim #skyrim spoilers #argonian #dragonborn #skyrim rp #also why tf is there only white human children?#also what if i want my kids to be mine and not adopted?#almost all the kids are blond and blue eyed and the lady im marrying has dark hair and dark eyes and im a fuckin lizard #that will do us no good

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bobemajses · 1 year

Note

I was going to wait for my mom to give me the names of the shtetls, but everything is crazy with my IV meds for Crohn’s (Ashkenazi genes for the lose) and moving and so…

My mother’s maternal family is from Bessarabia. Most of them left, on the same passport that they kept mailing back, to New York in the 1910’s. Some came through Uruguay, like my great grandfather who was a gaucho and furniture salesman down there for many years. My grandmother was born in Queens and was the first female graduating class of Queens College. She worked in a canteen during the war and was advised to change her last name so as not to appear Jewish. Her brother served in Britain and survived a Blitz bombing outdoors. (The irony is this name was changed names they came to America!)

Her paternal family came from Southern Poland in the 1910’s as well. Not all came over and actually one of the towns they were from was Oświęcim which became Auschwitz. I only had two cousins from those who stayed who survived. Nearly all were murdered in Auschwitz. One cousin survived the camp. The other cousin hid with her two small sons in a church basement where she was required to do all their menial tasks in exchange for being hidden. One day, a nun told her the war was over. She didn’t believe it and went outside to see for herself. She hadn’t been in daylight for years and fainted. When she came to, her two sons were in a cattle cart. She never saw then again.

Interestingly enough, only one surname is Cyrillic in my maternal family. The rest are Germanic. My grandfather was born in Manhattan and his surname is shared with a prominent Nazi. Very uncomfortable. My grandfather served in WWII in Hawaii.

Unfortunately, I know extremely little about my dad’s family. His father’s family was from Warsaw and owned a hardware store and considered themselves fairly well-to-do. In the 1890’s, my dad’s paternal grandfather visited the city (NY) to consider moving there. He was appalled by the tenements and filth and couldn’t understand why anyone would leave their homeland. If he only knew. My grandfather was an electrical engineer in Warsaw.

My grandmother’s family was from a very small shtetl outside of Warsaw. She moved to Warsaw to work as a milliner. She had a very unusual surname and I’ve been unable to find anyone alive with it with whom I’m related.

My grandparents left Warsaw when the Germans invaded and made it to the Russian border. The guards were refusing to allow anyone in so there was a camp of refugees. One night, the guard opened the gate and turned his back. My grandparents got married at some point during this, probably by a minyan, and probably not legally binding, but any talk of this upsets my dad so I don’t know more.

They were deported to Siberia and put in a prison camp. My grandmother died of breast cancer before I was born (more of those great Ashkenazi genes) and my grandfather wouldn’t talk about it so all I know is that they considered themselves very lucky to have been ‘saved’ by the Soviets and ‘only’ imprisoned in a gulag. (I learned about intergenerational trauma relating this to my therapist ten years ago.) My grandfather parlayed his knowledge of electronics to serve as an electrician instead of mining coal. (He had to work on live wires with no gloves.) My grandmother was given wool to knit for the guards and their wives and received bread in return. Mt grandparents had a son there who died of measles and malnutrition at the age of two.

Shortly before the war ended, they were moved to Tashkent. Then the Soviets tried to force my grandfather into the army. The Americans were in Germany at this point. I have no idea how, but my grandparents made it to Germany and were put in Schwäbisch Hall Displaced Persons Camp. My dad was born there in 1947.

In 1949, they emigrated to New York. They had another son six years later.

Two things of interest: We did all the DNA sites and my parents are very distant cousins which is apparently common among Ashkenazi because of endogamy. Also, both my parents speak Yiddish. It’s my dad’s first language. However, my mother grew up with ‘southern’ Yiddish and my father ‘northern’ Yiddish.

We survived!

Thank you so so much for sharing this! This was a very interesting and emotional read for me, as I personally can relate to a lot of things in your text. Ashkenazi genes can be a burden in a lot of different ways, but, most importantly, they, we, our ancestors and their stories survived. I wish you all the best and wish I could talk with you sometime.

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antiloreolympus · 2 years

Text

10 Anti LO Asks

(Note: All of these asks are before episode 206 (Season 2 finale) so some may be dated.) 1. ok but I love Rachel spent the latter half of 2021 being like ooooh Kronos is coming back!! this is a big deal!! only to timeskip ten years and NOTHING happened. like wow even Kronos isn't a big deal when it comes to how totally not pathetic Persephone is as a 30+ year old doing no work and only being obsessed with a guy she knew for a month. literal masterclass in awful writing. It's almost impressive how bad it is.

2. Deadass I don't even get why RS is like oh yeh nymphs and other creatures should be second class citizens but they're also all "trash" and thus its good and even encouraged to abuse and mistreat them. like yeah that's what was missing, racism where the marginalized group are evil and "deserve" to be abused and mistreated by those with all the power over them. THAT's what mythology was so sorely missing. jfc. I know a lot of the WT staff are white people and so is Rachel but wtf???

3. It's quite funny how a woman old enough to be my mother cannot draw or write worth shit and there are literal teenagers on this website who are a thousand times the artist and writer she could ever hope to be.

4. This isn’t me trying to be mean but like, why is everything from the book covers to the official merch so ,.. cheap looking? Like these are supposed professionals, not Rachel, doing it, yet they’re still so poorly designed and crafted. It doesn’t help the images Rachel gives time to work with are all in the rushed, ugly style now either 😪

5. I just find it funny that every time an LO fan or even WT promotes it its like ... they ONLY use art from the first 10-ish episodes at best. Like yall, that was over four years ago, why aren't you using current art to be more accurate? Like it's kinda telling on themselves they know the quality declined rapidly after the first few months but are like "just ignore that! look at this three good panels from 2018!"

6. I HATE those panels where RS tries to be anatomically correct to IRL humans and its like omg they look even worse (and are still wildly wrong anyway?? She cannot draw heads to save her life for real). Like lady just work within your stylization, there's a reason people picked up your work off what it used to be versus what it is now.

7. this isnt necessarily LO based but I do find it crazy how people like RS and her fans viewed the original hymn like ugh Demeter is such a bitch why wouldnt she be happy Hades married her daughter like .... you guys are aware ancient brides tended to be married at 14, right? maybe that's why Demeter was pissed and creeped out by him. They're so blinded by their fantasy of this "perfect Hades" that never existed over the truth of a mother defending her literal CHILD.

8. Zeus is objectively the only hot man on cast because he actually has a personality, fashion sense, and pretty hair meanwhile Hades just looks like a dusty old man with zero drip and a million and one red flags 🫣

9. "This style of story telling" what style? just lying and making everything up to where it matches nothing in mythology? my god, she's so concerned over looking like a clever writer who has everything planned out and knows more than anyone else (including actual greeks??? ma'am) over actually telling a decent story. ive never seen someone so self conscious about being perceived as a "real writer" before.

10. Why even use mythology when you won't keep any of the stories true to how they were, change all the relationships, and just make up whatever else instead? At that point just go "this was inspired by the greek myths" and use your own OCs, not claiming you're telling an accurate story with a ton of research put into it. Rachel really just wants to have her cake and eat it too, huh?

#anti lo #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

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enzombie · 1 year

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I just finished season 4 and im. Im ruined. Ive already watched the show like 6 times btw but FUCK. GOD DAMN

Blaine being truly honest for the first time in as long as we've known him by telling angus he made the sign from god, only to get a reality check when his dad isnt as selfish and cowardly as he is, except thats such a mindfuck because his dad is a horrible awful child abusive son of a bitch, and it must have been so confusing to watch the church devour fraud bater under angus's orders. How eagerly angus watches blaines reaction, how he so hopes that makes up for everything, its sickening. Especially at the end of their arc where if i got it correctly, enzo sold them out? Told FMG they'd be coming and led them to a trap? And we saw angus and his flock get shot down. I cant help but feel bad for blaine

Peyton refusing to let FMG get away with moving up the time of the execution, marching into that studio and taking iver the broadcast, being the REASON people SHOWED UP at the warehouse and being right there with johnny fucking frost of all people, and ravi right by her side.

Major leaping over the crowd of soldiers to tackle chase, raging out completely and rightfully after all the shit he had to do for what he believed to be the right cause, only for the leader of that cause to spit in his face by trying to execute the love of his life. Because despite everything they still love eachother still and major is so goddamn pissed hes not gonna let another person murder his kids and get away ith it (even tho we saw so little of captain seattle i do not rememebr his actual name. Or jordans half the time)

Liv's stone cold expression at pulling the level and crushing chase's skull, and being so right about it too. Still tho, it wasnt enough to bring levon back, just like every time she tries to do the thing she thinks is right, someone she loves dies for it. When she tries to shoot blaine on sniper brain but cant, lowell tries to and gets killed. When she saves the chaos killer victims and clive from dying to a zombie, that zombie just had to be drake. When she tries to help human-zombie relations (misguidedly) and save lives by being renegade, she gets a front row seat to levons head being crushed. Her pain is so real idec chase is done with. It wasnt a good ending for her and i can feel that so clearly, even with that hopeful ending scene

My friend and I talked abour how selfish Liv can be when we started watching together (her first time), but how selfish can someone be when they give up the cure for their ailment twice for other peoples happiness?

And Chase. God. That entire decline during the latter half of the season was brutal. When thwy announced renegades execution and the video came out, he was done it was over, there was truly no coming back from this. He was so out of it at the point of the supporters breaking in that his voice cracks when he shouts at major to stop and when he says dont shoot and hes scrambling wildly for some form of control, in this case a gun that he places his head right on the gillutine. I think its a mercy that he died so painlessly.

At least Dale and Clive got a happy ending to the season though, getting married and getting the cure. Clive calling liv partner when they were saying goodbye in chase's office, it was just so bittersweet

Hope its okay that this is so long i just wanted to dump my thoughts onto someone ^^ this show is phenomenal i cant recover from this tonight.

DAMN. THATS A LOT OF WORDS. DAMN.

I uh idk how to respond to most of this cus there's so much but I'll try my best (also why this took so long to reply sorry)

Blaine is a mixed feelings character, he's a fan favourite and he's always enjoyable to watch. Angus on the other hand idk a single soul who likes that bitch. Say what you will about Blaine, but Angus was EVIL. Shout out to Enzo for killing him off fr. We are grateful. All my homies hate Angus.

Also Enzo didn't exactly sell them out, he more completely set them up - he went directly to Blaine and Angus to make sure they went the exact route, made sure he was there for all the final plans, he collaborated directly with the US military to get rid of Angus and his pals. Like it wasn't a split second betrayal it was a planned execution, he knew full well Angus would take the bait and was probably hoping Blaine would too. I'm not sure if it was even an official FG operation because as far as we know, Chase didn't hear anything back from Enzo about the church. He didn't tell the press his name, he was the only FG personnel there - I'm sus that he just took it upon himself to deal with them. King behaviour.

And yeah Peyton was girlboss at the end of season 4 but it's like. When her bestie in danger she got all this proactive shit but when she's acting mayor the energies like half that. Makes me mad.

As for major. Little sympathy. Oh did your child soldiers get killed? Maybe child soldiers are a bad idea? Maybe you wouldn't be upset if you didn't have children as soldiers in the first place? Maybe giving untrained children weapons is guaranteed to go badly and end with them injured or killed? Do you think? Like. Honestly. And the way he was with Levon. Major was weird in season 4 idk. And I disagree with them killing Chase. There's so many worse people in the show that she can't bring herself to kill but Chase she executes without hesitation. He wasn't even that bad. I don't think its very fair for him either. Like he was trying his best to keep Seattle under control, and renegade was actively making everything worse. And if you think he was doing a bad job what came after in season 5? With Major: terrorism and hatecrimes peaked and he did nothing, he made Seattle completely reliant on Blaine who (bless him) is not trustworthy and not a good person and is obviously going to be a controversy. With Enzo: the second he took over, Majors mistakes blow up and Seattle dealing with civil war. Not to mention Enzo isn't great at de-escalation, at any point - not even just when he's in charge, since his introduction he walks in and makes situations worse on purpose (can't help being a girlboss)

As for your question about Liv being selfish - it's shortsightedness. She'll do selfless things that make her feel good but she won't consider the consequences. Stuff like giving up the cure is fine, not really any consequences, she gets to help her friends. The renegade stuff, she gets to scratch sick people and feel good about it - but the whole of Seattle gets closer and closer to dying horribly every time she does. It's like only caring about what's directly in front of her. Irritates me a little tbh. Especially when she's one of the only zombies not experiencing the food shortage so it's just this whole privilege thing while thousands of people are at risk.

Clive and Bozzio are so precious I love them so much they deserve everything. That's all.

Anyway, hope you and your friend enjoy season 5✌️

#izombie

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eric-the-bmo · 2 years

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Tell me more about Ven pls!!

Oh!!!!!! Oh Ven my beloved!!! He’s so awful okay where do I start oh goodness-

{warnings for mentions of cannibalism, manipulation, memory loss, and suicide ideation}

Also all of this is from memory, I haven’t checked his character document in like half a year-

So! Mechanically speaking, Ven is a dnd character I have yet to play (im so sorry, ive got you intrigued by my dnd oc), but I’ve planned out events in my head and he essentially functions as a whump oc, my funky little pathetic magician who will be covered in blood. In regards to Dungeons and Dragons, he’s an Aberrant Mind Sorcerer with the Haunted One background <3

He likes poetry, peppermint tea, the color green, and would really just prefer to live peacefully in Meadowvale with his wife. He’s quiet and a bit nervous, and is reluctant to admit he has magic and has a habit of talking to himself. He dislikes being pushed on certain topics and will erupt in anger if continued to be pushed, and will often stalk off to read poetry to calm down (nerd). He also likes cooking, and carries around a journal that functions as both a poetry book and diary. He has very long fingers, a sign that his body has already begun to change from delayed ceremorphosis. I’m uh, I’m not the best at describing personalities? Maybe I’ll ramble more but here’s his backstory:

Ven showed up to Meadowvale around 8 years ago and bought an empty bookshop to use as his own. He was very religious and never spoke much about his past, even to Ophelia, the captain of the guard who would eventually become his wife. The two of them got married, and it rained, but that was okay. A little over a year ago in the current timeline, he suddenly disappeared. Search parties were sent out but to no avail, and eventually Ophelia hired a passing adventuring party (who called themselves the Dice Crew, and might lowkey be wanted by the law) to go find him. They did in fact find him, in the woods, and while he was a bit apprehensive they managed to bring him back to her. Unfortunately what they didn’t realize was that during his time being missing, he was being held captive in a mind flayer lair (hooray!). He had fit the requirements for the ceremorphosis process, and so an illthid tadpole was inserted into his brain via his eye. Before it was inserted, however, he prayed to every deity he could think of, begging for them to come save him. None of them did, of course, and in his last moments before the parasite ate away at him he vowed to never worship them again. Anyway he has Extreme Memory Loss, and one of the only things he remembers is that the gods did not help him (help him with what, exactly, he doesn’t remember). (Also fun fact it’s implied there are other people like him who got implanted with parasites, hooray)

He eventually get reaccustomed to everything, but due to so many townspeople worrying over him he eventually felt,,, guilty? He dislikes being pitied, and perhaps if I had the words I could explain it better. This is around the time he starts to develop some sort of PTSD from what happened- disliking things going near his eyes, panicking whenever he sees a tadpole or some kind of multi-legged bug, nightmares he can’t quite remember. Ophelia tries her best to help him (genuinely let’s acknowledge how she’s also going through a lot atm, we love Ophelia in this household) This is also when the parasite residing in his brain starts to act up. More migraines, sleepwalking (*cough* it’s possession *cough*), things like that. The parasite also communicates with Ven, although since he doesn’t know of its existence, he merely thinks it’s his own thoughts, and often speaks out loud “with himself” to try and figure out his thoughts. Cere essentially functions as intrusive thoughts, self-hatred and anxiety for Ven. One day in the summer a man enters the shop with a dagger and threatens to kill Ven, implying he knows the poet. Ven, having no recollection of this man, tries to deesculate the situation. The stranger lunges at him, and in this moment of stress- Well, his body’s psionic magics have slowly been building up for a long time. With all of it suddenly being unlocked, well... the man was torn apart, and Ven entered a panic attack. Unbeknownst to himself, he used his magic to make Ophelia hide the body, and he was afraid of this newfound sorcery. His guilt over being a supposed burden to his wife, as well as all of his guilt over murdering a stranger/ his anxiety over being found out, his fears of hurting Ophelia with his magic... There were a lot of factors, one of them being Cere’s manipulation, of course, that pushed him to leave. He reasoned that if he became an adventurer, he could find a way to get rid of his horrible magic. He secretly gathered up everything he felt he needed to become an adventurer, and on his and Ophelia’s wedding anniversary they spent the entire day together. It was nice. He left in the middle of the night, with a letter on the counter explaining why he had gone. He promises her he will write to her (there will be no address listed, to prevent her from tracking him down. He wants to do this himself.), and that he will come home eventually.

While he doesn’t have a good grasp on his magic yet (sometimes accidentally using it), he has a good enough grasp that he can manipulate it enough to avoid killing anyone with it. AKA, his spellcasting primarily focuses on Utility, Enchantments, Area of Effect, anything besides violence, although he does have a few small-damage spells. Despite having a green color palette, his magic is purple, a color that’s primarly used for Ceremorph. When using his Metamagic or using extra Spell Slots (AKA when he uses too much magic ig), it will result in a nosebleed.

Eventually Ven will discover the parasite in his brain, as well as the fact he’s becoming a mind flayer, and it just overall won’t be a very fun time for him (he has a horrible mental breakdown and temporarily goes insane, because the way he finds out is that he blacks out and wakes up in the middle of eating a man’s brain). I’ve a few scenes in mind, such as him considering bashing his head against the wall. My personal favorite is where he considers staking himself with the tools from his monster hunting kit, because isnt he a monster? Isnt it better to destroy himself now, rather than watch himself become worse? He’ll decide against it, saying he promised Ophelia he’d come home. (It’s also because even I don’t want him to die like that, that’s too dark for me. I want this poet to get better.)

he has such low self esteem, he doesn’t want to bother people and so he doesnt bring up his trauma at all and feels bad when he needs to be comforted. He has religious trauma and an avoidance coping mechanism and it’s so terribly bad, bestie u cant run from the parasite in ur brain. He wants to help others to try and prove he’s not a bad person, that he’s not a monster, and despite making bad decisions he doesn’t want to hurt anyone. He likes cooking, eventually he’ll only be able to be a cannibal. He’s a bit of an asshole. He’s against murder and will try to find another way to apprehend enemies, but hates the Gods and will in fact try to stab one (with the Stranger’s Dagger, mind you, because I love parallels), deep down he’s worried he did something that caused him to lose the Gods’ favor. He’s got PTSD from two fucking events, I want him to hallucinate. Ophelia deserves to be really pissed at him. He’s gonna have a horrible time, I want him to have a happy ending after everything he’s gone though.

He’s my pathetic little poet and I adore him, he’s in a psychological horror movie <3

#thank you for sending this ask it was so fun #ven vibes #eric finally speaks #bestie im also focusing on two other ocs if u wanna ask baout them /hj /lh

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