#THAT'S ENOUGH OUTTA YOU MORON

[demonslayedher]

Wind down doodle (and tribute to one of the most badass moments in the whole manga)

#kanroji mitsuri #my nice art #bloody ball point pens #my true weapon of choice #THAT'S ENOUGH OUTTA YOU MORON

[jayke0]

Moron

Pairing: Blue Jones and Cecil Dennis x fem reader

Summary: kinktober day 15, Free Use

Rating: 18+

Warnings/content: Free use (though probs not as much as expected), drunkeness, alcohol mentions, degrading, blowjob/facefucking, p in v, protected sex (condom), oral (f receiving), squirting, threesome, hair pulling, crying, Blue is his own warning, name calling, Cecil just being an overall dummy and saying funny things, lmk if there's anything else i should add :).

Word count: 1,982

Credit: @automnepoet for proofreading ily.

…………………………………………….......................

As much as Blue hates to admit it, you don't belong to him. You've had enough other men's cocks inside you by now for it to quite frankly be stupid of him to say it; yet he still does, he still tells you every time he's balls deep inside you that you belong to him and him only.

You have someone else that says the same kinda thing, but it's just the other way round. Cecil likes knowing that he's yours, and unlike yourself, he actually sticks to it… not that he could find any other girl that'd take his pathetic ass anyway.

The man comes stumbling into the club as usual, bottle in one hand and red stained cloth wrapped around the other. He asks around for you of course, but when he's directed towards the head of the club's office he's faced with something he didn't want to see in a million years; you, cheek pressed harshly against the desk as Blue Jones pounds you from behind, and the worst part is that you seem to be loving it.

Cecil bursts in, making both of you stop in your tracks.

"Heyy! You can't do that! She said she's for me!" The disheveled man protests.

Oh my god.

"Cecil– ah– get outta here! You dunno what you're getting yourself int—" you're silenced by a hard thrust from Blue, who'd only seemed to stop for a second at the disruption before continuing to slam into you harshly.

The sight makes Cecil wince, and he can already feel the tears welling in his eyes as he wipes his face on his sleeve.

"This your other man huh?" Blue leans over you and sneers in your ear. "The one you like to just give yourself too? Without even a care for the money he doesn't make me?" Blue eyes the other man before gesturing for him to come over to the both of you. "She's told me how pathetic you are, you're just a bumbling moron looking for a quickie, ain't you?"

Cecil shakes his head quickly, but the tears start falling down his face as he sniffles and tries to hide it in his jacket. His cheeks are so rosy and flushed, strands of curls falling in his face as his shoulders shudder. It's a sight that you're quite familiar with, and one that makes you more aroused than it probably should.

You manage to look up at Cecil despite the other man's hand wrapped around the back of your neck and pressing you against the hard wood. "Cecil baby, c'mere." You gesture for him to come closer after smacking Blue's wrist to slow down, which he surprisingly obliges to.

Cecil stumbles towards you and puts the bottle on the desk. Feeling your arms wrap around his waist is somewhat reassuring to the man and he sighs shakily, showing you his bloody hand with a pout. "I tried fucking some other girl, but she got pissed when I swallowed one of her rings by accident when I was sucking on her fingers."

You try not to laugh, but it's incredibly hard when the man just naturally gets himself into moronic situations.

Blue isn't as ashamed to hide his laughter, a raucously snarky chuckle coming from behind you.

You manage to prop yourself up on your elbows and you stroke his wrists, carefully running your fingers over his. "I want you to join, Cecil, will you do that for me?"

You know he's a sucker for pleasing you… and for getting his cock sucked whenever he can.

"Only if he shuts the fuck up." He points at Blue, which warrants a hard thrust from the club owner.

You gasp and nod. "He will baby, he will. C'mere, lemme make you feel better."

Your hands start working on Cecil's trousers, which is hard to do when you're getting your back blown out by your boss, especially one that favours you the most. Eventually you pry his slacks open to paw at his cock. You wrap your hand around the clothed flaccid length while the other holds onto his good hand; you know he loves that too, it makes him feel wanted.

It doesn't take very long for Cecil to get hard, despite being face to face with his 'contender', and soon he's rolling his hips into your hand and begging for your mouth.

"Damn, you get excited quick don't you?" Blue mocks, which makes Cecil whine and buck his hips into your hand.

You feel him rest his bad hand on your head and a little part of you hopes he doesn't get any fucking blood in your hair. Your attention is drawn back to the pathetic man that's now whaling for you to suck his dick.

"Please baby! Please please, I've been good— well apart from earlier but that don't count 'cause I didn't even get to stick it in."

You moan softly, since you love it when he tells you he's been good, before you pull his cock free of his underwear, the tip throbbing and leaking already.

Blue's pace seems to stop for a moment as he watches you take the blunt head in your mouth, wrapping your lips around Cecil's shaft while the man in question whimpers.

The club owner's cock twitches as he observes you taking it deeper and deeper till your nose is pressed against the scruffy man's abdomen, unkempt pubes tickling your skin.

"Shit, honey, you're so good at taking it in the throat aren't you?" Blue's hand runs over your head and you nod dumbly, loving the feeling of being full at both ends.

"Let's see how you fair while I'm fucking your brains out."

You whine and choke as Blue starts thrusting again. The way you get pushed forward only pushes you further down on Cecil's cock, who lets out a strangled moan.

Eventually you get your bearings and you're able to wrap your hand around the other's cock and pull off of him, just to take him all into your mouth once again.

Both the men moan at that and you feel Blue's hips start to stutter as he struggles to hold himself together, curses and moans coming out through clenched teeth.

"God, I love watching you being used, you like it don't you? Like having both your greedy holes filled? Just like the whore you are." Blue tugs your hair, which in turn pulls your mouth off of Cecil with a loud pop and a gurgled moan from you.

"I do, Blue! Fuck I love both your cocks." You whine, scrambling to get your mouth on the other man again.

Cecil tries to rock his hips forward with desperate cries, but the club owner keeps your head firmly pulled back.

"Beg for it, beg to suck his cock again."

"Oh c'mon! I thought you said you were gonna be quiet—" Cecil complains.

You whimper and whine, but Blue's grip is tight on your hair, and if you wait any longer you're going to cum all over the harsher man's cock before you even get your mouth on Cecil.

"Please Blue— please lemme help him— ah— he's so desperate for it I can't help it!"

That seems to work, the man letting go of your head to let you go back to what you were doing.

Cecil feels like he's going explode if he doesn't feel the warmth of your mouth soon, but finally your lips are wrapped around him again and he can hold the back of your head; this time going not so easy on you.

He fucks into your wet heat with staggered thrusts, his head tilted back in pleasure as he uses your throat for his own gain, loud pathetic whimpers coming from his lips.

" 'atta girl, all for us to use—" Blue pants. You can hear in his voice that he's getting close too, which you're relieved about, because you think if he continues fucking you like this your legs are going to give out and he'll have to hold you up.

"I wanna use you like this more— please lemme do this more, it's so nice." Cecil begs, but you're unsure if it's for you or for Blue.

"Wonder how many others I can get to fuck you, maybe one in this tight little hole here—" your boss runs his thumb over your other hole and it makes you choke out a moan.

The constricting of your throat is enough to make Cecil spill suddenly, his cock buried so deep in your throat that it bypasses your taste buds and pumps straight down your esophagus.

Blue is next to fill you up, his growls and moans making you whimper as he grips your hips and fills the condom with his arousal, his head tilting back to enjoy the feeling.

Your legs are shaking by the time the men both pull away, but you're left still strung high on that cliff, hoping to God that one of them will take mercy on your poor throbbing cunt.

Your prayers are answered sooner than you expect.

Blue's arms wrap underneath your knees and pull you up against his chest, your legs crushing against your own chest with your throbbing heat on show for Cecil.

All you can do is scramble a little in Blue's grasp; if you know him well enough, you know what he wants, and it's going to make you scream and claw at his arms from being so sensitive.

"I see you looking at her. Go on, use that stupid mouth for something good."

Cecil is drooling at the sight of your cunt spread for him like that and he drops to his knees, gazing up at you as if you're some kind of deity blessing him with your presence.

Your arms hold onto Blue's, bracing yourself for the way Cecil's tongue is going to make you squirm, but before you can, you feel hardness bumping against your cunt.

How the fuck is he hard again already?

You don't have time to contemplate before your boss is shoving his thick cock inside you once more, fucking you open by bouncing you on himself.

"Shit, I love this cunt, honey."

All you can do is shriek and clench around him, the feeling being enhanced when you feel Cecil's tongue working on your clit… He may not be the best at holding his load or fucking, but he definitely knows how to use his tongue.

You're driven closer and closer to ecstasy each time you're brought down on Blue's cock, Cecil's tongue waiting for you mercilessly every time the other is buried deep inside your cunt.

Your body feels like it's on fire, and it's only a matter of a few more thrusts before you're crying out for both of them, your body squeezing and tensing on Blue so much that you're pretty sure it winds him for a second. You feel pleasure rush through your body and out of your cunt, and it's only once you open your eyes that you realise what happened.

"Oh sh–shit... I'm sorry, Cecil..."

The man looks up at you in pure awe before shaking his head, pushing his dampened curls out of his face as he wipes your dripping arousal from his skin. "I had a girl actually piss on me once, so that was a much better surprise."

You aren't able to hold back a laugh this time, though it's definitely a shaky one... and you even hear Blue let out a quiet chuckle.

You're about to let yourself down, but the harsher man tightens his grip on your thighs, and that's when you realise he didn't cum. "Ah ah, where'd you think you're going, honey? You still owe me another orgasm, and I think I got a lot more friends that would wanna get in on this too, sweetheart."

...........................................................................

Prompts by: @/flightlessangelwings

Tagging people: @cowboymarcs @sad1st1c-wh0re @poopoobuttsy @boredzillenial @mllover260 @simpforbritgents @saevenswelt @partssoldseparately @keira-kaz2y5 @theincredibleinkspitter @l-lune @red-hydra @queerponcho @summonthesoups @motleyfolk @steven-grants-world @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction

#blue jones smut #blue jones #sucker punch smut #sucker punch #cecil dennis #cecil dennis smut #revenge for jolly #oscar isaac characters #kinktober

[perictione00]

Call me Mommy

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x reader

Warnings: Use of curse words, smut.

Synopsis: You give Gojo a taste of his own medicine.

Jujutsu Kaisen Masterlist

"You like that, Mr. Gojo", you said with doe eyes as you continued stripteasing the old man. You knew he was getting hard; it wasn't just some skin but the traditional Gojo clan kimono that did the magic. You started undoing the obi belt, revealing more of your body, leaving barely anything for imagination, but of course, you turned away to torment him more.

"Come on, sweetheart, this is torture", he said, standing up from the couch while taking off his office shirt. He was well-built for someone his age. Maybe this was gonna be much easier than you expected.

You got on your knees, trying your best to look as submissive and appealing as you could. Unbuckling his belt, you cupped his bulge, making him sigh. He looked at you with a loving gaze, and that right there was what you needed for your plans with him. Before you could think further, he got down to your level and kissed you deeply. Fuck, this is getting good.

You and Gojo had fucked around a few times, so you knew how weirdly kinky and adventurous he was when it came to sex. What you never expected was your friend showing you Gojo's sex tape online. It wasn't even surprising, but what shocked you was you. Yeah, that asshole had the audacity to not only make but upload the sex tape, including you, online without your consent. This shit was serious because, unlike Gojo, you had a job and a great reputation to maintain. It could not only embarrass the hell outta you but could get you ostracized socially or, even worse, get you fired. You were not gonna let a fucking manchild disrupt your life.

On your way to his infamous farmhouse, you kept checking your cell phone out of fear. You did not want a colleague of yours to find out about this. Once you reached the destination, you saw a few women coming out. Like, what were you even expecting? As you opened the door, you saw Gojo wearing a bunny outfit, showing his pole dancing skills. Now that was a sight for sore eyes. You wondered how someone could look so delicious but act like a total moron at the same time; however, that's not what you're here for. "You spoiled fucking whore", you begin as you move closer to him. "Wanna tell me about the stunt you pulled?"

"Oh babyyy, I don't remember telling you about my humiliation kink, but please don't stop", he said as he sat down in an intentionally sultry position. You were sure he knew about the effect he had on people, but today's not the day. Standing right in front of him, you slid your hands into his hair and pulled em before asking, "Would my lovely bitch like to explain why the fuck was a sex tape made and uploaded online without my permission?"

"Shit, babe-", you cut him off before he could continue, saying, "No, Gojo, you don't get to enjoy this situation; I'm serious right now. Delete that video right now; I don't care how many procedures it requires, I want it off the internet and your cellphone. Every fucking duplicate, deleted, RIGHT NOW!"

"Calm down, hon, why don't we have some fun", he said as his hands made their way to your ass, "we can talk, but let's be comfortable first, no?"

"No. No, Gojo I'm not kiddin right now; delete that shit, or just gimme your cellphone; I'll do it myself". Before you could search for it, he pulled out his mobile and said, "I'll comply with your wishes...I guess, but what's in it for me hmm?"

You've had enough; you already had a long day, and now he was getting on your last nerve. "Nothing. You don't get anything, Gojo; just by doing this, you've already compromised my job, and who knows what? So just stop irritating me and do it".

"Okay, okay, woah, grumpy pants I will delete it from the internet, but at least lemme keep a cop-", he stopped and started laughing as he saw you glaring in his direction. "You know you can always join my company if things go downhill", he said while deleting the last copy as you replied, "I'd never wanna work under you".

"You sure loved it the other day in the hotel", of course, he said that, for which you gave him the finger.

Fast forward: a spineless coward got you fired by spreading rumors about your risqué incident, and now you were planning to get back to Gojo Satoru. You knew no sex tape, rumors, or false accusations could shame or humiliate him, so your petty self came up with the greatest idea of all time, and you knew it was going to work.

And that's how you ended up on your knees in front of Gojo Sr. It wasn't hard to have him wrapped around your fingers, and it was just a plus that he was far more fun than you imagined him to be. Because Gojo's daddy issues portrayed him like a villain, you couldn't imagine him having such a huge dick, and he was so good at using it too, you hit a total jackpot.

You moaned loudly as you rode him, with his hands on your ass, helping you move better.

You loved how his expert fingers always found your clit helping you reach your orgasm right before he came. You rode through your orgasm as he kissed you deeply. "Fuck...fuck, are you okay, love?", he asked. "Never been better", you said as you pecked his lips again. You got ready to go back home after a shower together, as he was staying back for some work. It was all going well; you knew a confession was coming your way any day. You took more time with your heels to catch the perfect timing for something before you went out of the office.

As you walked out, you smiled when you saw the elevator door opening and a dumbfounded Gojo Satoru making his way to you. "Why—not trying to be rude, but why are you here?", he questioned as he looked back and forth between his father's office door and you.

"Oh, Daddy just needed some help, so Mommy came to the rescue".

#Gojo x reader #Gojo Satoru x reader #jjk #Jujutsu Kaisen #jjk smut #gojo smut #gojo satoru x reader smut #sub gojo #jjk dilf #JJK Gojo Satoru #dilf gojo #gojo satoru #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader smut #jujutsu kaisen x fem!reader #jjk x reader smut #jjk gojo smut #gojo x reader smut

[livesincerely]

[bits & bobs] common knowledge

aka the ‘Jack didn’t know they were dating’ fic

00000

One of the last things that gets packed⁠—right up there with the wifi router, the stuff for the bathroom, and Jack’s good pillow⁠—is the calendar. Davey carefully peels it from its place of honor on the front of the fridge, almost the whole of April carefully x-ed out.

“The 29th is on Friday,” he notes as he tucks it carefully away, smiling softly. “We should try and do something.”

“Dave, we are up to our ears in fuckin’ boxes,” Jack complains from his spot on the floor, a roll of tape sitting on his chest as he attempts to become one with the carpet. “We ain’t gonna get our deposit back if we ain’t outta here before the first.”

“You were out of town on a contract last year and the year before that we both had the flu,” Davey complains. “It’d be nice if we could actually do something to celebrate this year.”

It’s at this point that Jack realizes he has no idea what the fuck Davey’s talking about.

“Dave,” he says. “What the fuck are you talkin’ about?”

“The 29th,” Davey says, like that alone should be enough of an explanation.

“What’s so special about the 29th?” Jack asks.

Davey frowns⁠. And not just his Jack, you dumbass frown, but the full-blown, pinched-mouth, brow-furrowed, Jack, this isn’t funny, stop it frown that makes makes Jack’s soul want to shrivel up and die whenever it’s pointed his way.

So, Jack pivots. Hard.

“I’m kiddin’,” he lies quickly, alarm bells blaring behind his eyes. What the fuck is on the 29th? “‘Course we can do somethin’. What about dinner at that Italian place we saw on the corner? It looked like a nice joint.”

Davey’s expression clears.

“God, I would kill for some tiramasu,” he says with a wistful sigh.

“Hopefully, it won’t come to that,” Jack laughs, more relief than anything. “I’ll call in the mornin’, see if they take reservations.”

“Perfect,” Davey says, with a beaming smile that makes Jack’s heart lurch for entirely different reasons. “It’s a date.”

“Yeah,” Jack says weakly. “It’s a date.”

00000

Jack panics.

Well, first he calls the restaurant and makes a reservation for two at 7pm.

But then, he panics.

He calls Katherine first, which turns out to be less than useless.

“Can you please stop cackling for three seconds and fucking help me?” Jack demands into the speaker, tugging at his hair in frustration.

But Kath just laughs and laughs until Jack hangs up on her in a huff. After about ten minutes, he calls her back—she’s still laughing.

He tries Tony next.

“You’re such a fucking moron,” Tony says, after sitting in dead silence for so long that Jack pulled the phone away from his ear to make sure the call hadn’t dropped. “I genuinely don’t understand how Davey’s put up with you for so long. I should send him a medal. Or maybe a fruit basket.”

“Quit with the wise cracks and help me,” Jack demands. “Davey’s, like, super fucking excited about this dinner an’ if I don’t figure out what the hell we’re supposed’ta be celebrating, he’s gonna kick me out before we even get moved in.”

“More like he’s gonna dump your dumbass and find someone who can actually remember an anniversary,” Tony snarks.

“He ain’t gonna— I’ve told you a thousand times, we ain’t like that,” Jack says, louder than he means to, flushed and flustered.

There’s another long, judgmental silence.

“Please seek professional help,” Tony says, flatly incredulous. “You are so beyond me, you’re orbiting fucking Saturn, Jackaboy—“

Jack hangs up on him too.

00000

“Are you upset?” Jack asks tentatively.

“I’m still deciding,” Davey says in a thin, even tone that really doesn’t bode well.

….

“Jack,” Davey murmurs, close enough that he can feel the whisper of his breath against his cheeks. “Apparently you haven’t noticed, but we’ve been dating for years. Tomorrow is our three-year anniversary.”

Jack, who had been swaying towards the warmth of Davey’s body, towards the promise of a kiss, freezes dead in his tracks. “What?”

But Davey just smiles. “Three years,” he repeats calmly.

“No, no, I heard you the first time, I jus’…” Jack shakes his head, hard, as if that with somehow make any of what’s happening make any kind of sense. “What?”

“When’s the last time you had sex with anyone but me?” Davey prompts—impossibly patient, all things considered. “Or went out on a date? Gave someone your number?”

“Not in fuckin’ ages,” Jack sputters, offended at the very thought. “You an’ me, we’ve got a good thing goin’. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“You wouldn’t cheat on me?” Davey specifies, tilting his head.

“Course not!”

“Why would it be cheating if we aren’t together?” Davey asks, pointedly.

Jack stares at him, trying to find the riddle hidden in Davey’s question. Because… Because…

“Oh,” he says blankly.

Davey laughs, curling his hands around Jack’s waist. “Oh,” he agrees.

“Three years?” Jack asks weakly.

“Jackie,” Davey sighs, apparently realizing that Jack needs this spelled out to him. “We live together. We share a bedroom. We spent last Christmas at your mom’s house and you introduced me to Charlie’s kids as ‘Uncle David’.”

“Oh,” Jack says again, because it really bears repeating. “How the hell have you managed to put up with my dumbass for three fucking years?”

“It probably helps that I’m madly in love with you,” Davey says, rolling his eyes even as another soft smile curls over his lips.

“Huh,” Jack says. It’s maybe not the best response, but it’s honestly a miracle he manages to say anything at all.

“You’re in love with me too,” Davey helpfully informs him.

“Well, I knew that part,” Jack huffs. Then, “How did you know that?”

“Because I know you,” Davey says, lacing their fingers together. “But feel free to say it aloud any time you like.”

“I love you,” Jack murmurs.

Davey’s smile is like the first days of spring: bright like sunshine, full of promise and full of hope.

And the taste of his kiss is even better.

#newsies #javid #*editor's note #*the writing desk #bits & bobs #not so much an update as a compilation #but please enjoy regardless

[im-not-batman]

For the ask WIP game

Spideypool falling please 😊

Oh I LOVE this one!

It's a 5+1 of spideypool falling for eachother and then Falling For Eachother. Featuring Dadpool because I'm a big fan of his work (Ellie).

"It really creeps me out when you do that, Webs." Wade said, sinking deeper into Peter's beat-up couch and kicking his fluffy-sock-clad feet up onto the other half of it that Peter was perched above. "I like sitting up here, sends all the blood to my brain so that I can beat you quicker," Peter reasoned and as if on queue the tinny TV speaker announced yet another victory. "You're such an asshole, Baby Boy," Wade smirked up at him, sounding more proud than annoyed. He threw a couple of M&Ms up for Peter to catch in his mouth, "do the other heros know how much of an asshole their comrade is?" Around his mouthful of chocolate and peanuts, he grinned, "I save all my worst bits for you, Wade." It was true too. He always felt like he needed to pose and posture around his fellow superheroes. Even though he'd come into his own as Spider-man over the last ten years, he still yearned for their approval and strived for their respect. Around Wade though, there was no need to pretend he was any better than he actually was. He didnt feel the need to constantly be on his best behaviour. Peter let his sass and sarcasm, disdain and irritation, good moods, bad moods and everything inbetween run rampant around Deadpool. And he never felt like he was being judged or evaluated. Just admired. Ecouraged even. "I'm touched," he said, throwing up another handful of M&Ms. This time Peter didn't react quick enough, lost in thought, and missed them.

Instead Wade caught the chocolates in his own mouth. Which shouldn't have been a thing but Peter's brain was making it a thing. He couldn't figure out if it was the ease with which he caught them – Peter's attraction to competency rearing it's ugly head – or the fact that the M&Ms were intended for his mouth and were now in Deadpool's. Either way, Peter's brain was doing some sort of horny gymnastics to rationalise it as tonsil tennis by-proxy. He watched Wade's throat bob as he swallowed. Peter's concentration was decidedly broken. He slipped. Usually that wouldn't be an issue; usually he'd have fallen from a much greater height and thus had more time to catch himself. But he was hanging from the ceiling this time. Granted, it was a relatively high ceiling, but not high enough. He let out an indecipherable jumble of a scream/shout/warning and Wade managed to dive out of the crash zone in time to not be knocked out by a 170 pound moron. When Peter didn't feel the heavy, throbbing pain of head trauma, he managed to gather his wits enough to realise that his head hadn't made contact with anything.

After another moment, he realised that Wade had seemingly managed to get his hand between Peter's skull and the floor. He still found himself uncomfortably contorted - half on the couch, half off, in a sort of human pretzel situation - but Wade had reacted in enough time to keep his head from cracking against the ground. And he was still holding him that way.

Peter's brain stopped working again. "Sorry," Wade said, trying to right the hero so that he was no longer lying at a downward 45 degree angle with legs akimbo, "Dad reflexes."

Peter wanted to scream. "You're apologising for saving me from a concussion?" Peter attempted to tease but it fell flat when he saw Wade's face, "Are you okay?" He let out a choked laugh, "Am I okay?" He asked incredulously, "you just fell eight feet." "And yet you're the one looking a bit loopy," Peter half laughed but wasn't able to keep the worry from seeping into his tone. "You scared the shit outta me, thought you were gonna go splat!" Deadpool justified. "From that height? Child's play. If I'd splatted, I'd have deserved it." It was a joke but Wade didn't seem to find it funny. "You should look after yourself better, Petey," he looked like he realised he was being too serious then, and his demeanor visibly shifted, "you don't regenerate, so you gotta look after that sinfully gorgeous meat suit of yours."

Ty ty for the ask! I really wanna get back into writing these two, I love them so much 🥲

Send me an ask with which of my WIPs from This Post you wanna hear about!

#spideypool #spiderman x deadpool #spiderman #deadpool #peter parker #wade wilson #marvel fic #spideypool fic #fanfic wip #ask game #roo answers

[whore4batfam]

edited an old piece:

“Do you think he regrets it?”

“Regrets what?” He was impatient. He had told the kid he could stay if he was quiet, and here he was, again, asking stupid ques—

“Taking us in.”

Dick shifted, switching the position of his arms behind his head. He looked up at the stars and sighed. “What’s there to regret, Jay.”

A small head popped up. “I didn’t say you could call me Jay,” Jason reminded, jaw jutting out. He probably thought he looked tough that way.

“And I didn’t say you could call me Dickhead, but here we are,” Dick shot back. “Sit down.”

Jason opened his mouth, but closed it when Dick narrowed his eyes at him. He laid back down and pointedly didn’t touch him. Fine. Kid might as well stay on his good side.

“…But do you think so?”

Dick sighed again. “Shit, kid.” The sky was clear enough tonight to see the stars twinkle. He cleared his throat. “He wouldn’t regret it for you. He went through with it, adopted you and everything. I know he seems like a moron sometimes—”

“He isn’t.”

“—but he does think things through.” Over and over and over, poking holes in Dick’s choices until he was left feeling like he was three inches tall. “He doesn’t regret you.”

Silence.

“And you?”

His voice was small, like he was unsure if he should be asking. Dick wanted to make a joke, tease him, but he couldn’t even look at him.

“Well, we’ll have to see,” was all he said.

Jury was still out for Dick, in Bruce’s case. He remembered thinking that would never be so, that Bruce could never be without him. He was his compass. Batman needed a Robin, but Bruce needed Dickie. He remembered how mad he got when Dr. Thompkins would lean over to look him right in the eyes and say, “He takes care of you.”

How could she understand? How could she think that she knew what it was like, what Bruce was like? That they were meant to be together no matter what, even if that meant—meant—

Dick shifted, pulling further away from Jason. Couldn’t stand the damn way the kid breathed.

“I think that,” and Jason sat up and swallowed, “you should come back. Talk to Alfred more. Bruce…he misses you.”

Dick stared at him. “Real sacrificial admitting that, huh.”

The boy jerked as if Dick had slapped him. Then he narrowed his eyes, looking all the world his twelve years, and kicked him. Dick didn’t bother moving away. “You’re an asshole.”

Dick scoffed. “I’m just saying it took a lot outta you. What you afraid of, me actually getting along with my own family?”

Jason shot up his feet. “I’m not holding my breath, you piece of shit,” he spat. He stomped over to the ladder and threw himself over it. “And neither is Bruce.”

Dick sat up. “Hey,” he barked. “You don’t understand that, you don’t understand anything—damnit, wait!” He scrambled to his feet. “You can’t go home by yourself!”

“Try me!”

“Jay, stop!”

“Don’t call me Jay!”

“You’re so dramatic,” Dick grumbled, following him down the ladder. He didn’t even react when the brat used his position to kick him in the ass either, which was very mature of him. He jumped the last few rungs, spinning around and collaring the kid when he tried to run. “Hey.”

“Fuck off,” Jason growled. But his eyes kept flickering left and right, as if waiting for something. Dick knew he was trying to act like he wasn’t intimidated. Kids are all alike in that way. But Jason betrayed himself in how he tried to escape. There was no cool disengagement, just nails digging into skin.

Dick knew the feeling. Someone bigger than you with their hands around you? All reason left until reality remained: being a small and cornered animal.

Dick avoided his swings, waiting until he was tired enough to slow his roll. It took a surprisingly long time. When Jason gulped in a breath, he latched his hands around his shoulders and dragged him close.

The kid stiffened, feet dragging as if he was afraid. So what if he was?

Dick shoved the guilt aside. “Listen to me,” he said firmly. “He may regret taking me in, and you may have replaced me, but that means all the jobs I did are yours now. You take care of him. Got it?”

Jason stared at him.

Dick shook him. “Got it? Say it out loud.” He shook him again. “Say it.”

“I’ll take care of him,” Jason said quickly, trying to hide the strain in his voice.

Dick released him. Well, more like shoved him. “Okay.” His throat was tight.

Jason kept staring at him, eyes glimmering like they were stars themselves. Which probably meant that he had made him cry, but. Well.

“Good,” Dick said, as if that was the end of it. And it was. It was an agreement. Maybe not an agreement between brothers, but certainly an agreement between sons. He jerked his head down to his apartment. “Go.”

Jason went, clattering and making a mess of things to make up for showing fear. Dick heard a crash and didn’t bother shouting. Dr. Thompkins’ eyes floated over the horizon, bouncing off the city lights.

“Remember. He takes care of you.”

Dick swallowed. Yeah, right.

#my fic

[ikeromantic]

Hi Yozzie!

Congratulations again on your milestone! For the New Years prompt, how about Silvio/pit trap/fruitcake.

The idea of Silvio of all princes stuck in Clavis's trap... (I'm not even sure I need Emma in there at all).

I had too much fun with this. Apologies in advance for shenanigans. Approx 1700 words of our lovely Prince Silvio in one of Clavis' infamous pit traps. If you haven't read Silvio's route, spoilers ahead! IkePri New Years Event story

Silvio gave a disgusted snort at the gaggle of nobles and wanna-bes. He didn’t have patience for their games tonight. All he wanted was to drink. To drink until this thirst in him ebbed or he got so drunk he didn’t notice it anymore. And this party wasn’t the place to get it done. No real booze here, just damned rose liquor and wine. 

He took one last look around and then stomped off down one of the hallways leading out of the ballroom. It was a dimlit corridor with cheap decor and faded wallpaper. Silvio shook his head. These Rhodolitians didn’t know how to spend. “If you wanna throw a real part- ah!”

His grumbling cut short as the floor opened up, dropping him down an unexpected hole. Silvio jangled the whole way down the shaft and hit bottom with a thud and a clang. He lay there a moment, still and silent with surprise. Then he leapt to his feet, cursing. 

“Hey! Hey! Ya morons left a hole in the floor! Damn it!” 

No one replied, of course. They were all at the party. Where he was also supposed to be, until dawn. Which meant no one was going to come looking for at least another few hours. “There’s no way I’m gonna rot down here,” he mumbled, glaring up into the darkness above. 

Silvio took a breath and steadied himself. He’d been in bad spots before. One didn’t sail without being able to handle himself, afterall. The hole he’d fallen into was pretty deep, the shaft slightly angled to slow a victim’s fall. The floor was cushioned with thick cloth and - he prodded the pile at his feet - hay. 

This must be one of Clavis’ infamous pranks. Silvio frowned. “When I see that guy, I’m gonna punch him so hard he smiles out his ass, and that’s just to start. He’s gonna pay me back for this. I’ll . . . I’ll bankrupt him. And his damn brothers. The whole damn kingdom . . .” 

He muttered angry promises as he searched the space for a way out or a way up. He found one of his own chains, the soft gold snapped in his fall, a covered plate of some sort of violently green pudding, and a book titled Smiling Is Good For You. He frowned at it and tossed the book against the wall.

“Useless.”

Silvio took to pacing. Back and forth across the small, padded space, his boots sinking in slightly with every step. It took five steps to cross from one wall to the other. Left wall, right wall, he began tapping them at each turn. Left wall, “I’m gonna make that bastard pay.” Right wall, “Hey! Somebody get me outta here!”

His fury faded as the quiet around him settled in. He tried to cling to it, but there was nothing to aim it at. Silvio was alone. No one to bribe or berate. Just a prince and his thoughts. He flopped onto the floor with a heavy sigh. “Boring,” he grunted.

A bit of hay poked through the fabric into his arm. He picked it out and threw it at the wall, but it wasn’t heavy enough to go far. It landed on his leg, one ending pointed at him in challenge. Silvio glared at it haughtily, but of course, the piece of hay wasn’t impressed. 

He pursed his lips and blew on it. The hay spun around lazily in the air and floated right back onto his leg. “Bastard! Get off!” Then he brushed at it, but the bloody thing clung to his glove and jabbed him in the wrist. “Damn it!”

“Is someone down there? Who did I catch tonight?” A voice floated down from above, the tone rich with held laughter. 

Silvio jumped to his feet, ignoring the bit of hay that still stuck to his coat. “Clavis?” The rage boiled back up in his veins. “You better get me outta here! I’m gonna punch you so hard the king feels it in his -”

“Hm. No, it appears I’ve trapped an angry dog. I thought I heard someone talking but now it’s just barking.” A laugh, high and wicked echoed down the shaft. “I’ll come back in a bit and check again.”

“Clavis! You better be joking! CLAVIS!” Silvio jumped and pounded on the walls, but the Rhodolitian prince was gone, or ignoring him. He could just picture the smug expression he would be wearing as he stood up there, listening to Silvio lose his mind. Then it hit him. This was the kind of reaction that sicko wanted.

Silvio took a long, deep breath. “Ok, ok. This guy wants to play games? Alright. I can play ‘em.” He sat down again, and the hay pricked his arm. 

He jerked it out of his sleeve and stared at it. “Yer worse than that mutt. At least he doesn’t try to stick to me.” Silvio spun the hay in his fingers, noticing for the first time how it caught the dim light and turned it golden. And even though the ends were sharp, the middle was soft. Surprisingly so. 

“You aren’t so bad, I guess. Least ways, you have some valuable qualities. I bet there’s people who would pay good money for ya.” 

The hay didn’t reply. 

Silvio sighed, trying to focus on not being angry. Or alone. “I like alone,” he told the bit of hay. “It’s good. Means no one’s screwing you. Lying to you. ‘Cept you.” The last bit he said quietly, as if it was a secret he was keeping from himself. 

He set the bit of hay on his leg and picked up the book. Reading was not a favorite activity, though a necessary one. But this trash wasn’t about products, resources, income streams, investment returns, real property or anything worthwhile. At least it had pictures. 

Although . . . “What kinda freak draws just the mouth?” Silvio thumbed through the book, looking at the smiles pictured within. Some of ‘em were nice. But some . . . “Look at this. Guy’s missing some teeth. Why’d they draw that in here? Genuine, it says.” He showed the page to the dry straw on his thigh.

“Stupid word too. Just means nobody caught you lyin’ yet.” He scoffed. “And this one? Lips all smooshed together. Ugh. Shy, it says. Pfft. Just somebody trying to fake like they don’t want somethin’ so you let ‘em close. Never met someone shy.”

The piece of hay was also not impressed. 

They continued to flip through the pages, well, Silvio flipped and the straw just sat there. As straw does. “Kinda like this one though.” He spoke more quietly as his fingertip traced the outline. “Reminds me of -” he cut himself off as the memories came. When he was young and his mother, the queen, still had her real smile. Not the vicious, brittle thing it became as jealousy and hurt ate her alive. 

He swallowed, pushing away the thought. Women were all like that. Fake. In love with money and power. And when there was a threat to what they had, they would do anything to hold onto it.

“Not gonna talk about that, ya got me?” Silvio glared at the hay as if it had forced these thoughts on him. He flipped the page so savagely it almost tore. “Damn it. This one looks like the mutt. Book says it’s joy but I’m gonna tell you, it’s stupidity.” He picked up the bit of hay and brought it closer to his face. “That’s the smile a fool makes when he -”

“Prince Silvio, are you . . . talking to a piece of grass?” Rio’s head appeared at the top of the hole, a bullseye lantern in hand. 

He stood up, throwing the book on the ground. It landed atop the weird green pudding with a squelching sound. “No!” Silvio tucked the straw into his pocket and hoped his brother mistook the gesture. “Ya didn’t see anything!”

“Right.” Rio’s wry grin told Silvio this was going to come back at the worst possible time. 

“You better get me outta here! If you’re lucky, I’ll only bankrupt half the country getting recompense for this!” 

The blonde tilted his head. “Well, see, that’s the thing. I want to get you out. I really do. But if you’re still angry, I might have to leave you here to cool off a little longer.”

Silvio felt a shiver crawl down his spine. Certainly rage and not fear. He liked being alone. Yeah. “You do and I will kill you.”

“Fair enough. So look, you like to make deals so let’s make one. I get you out now, and in exchange, you don’t take any revenge. Not on me, or Prince Clavis or Rhodolite. Nobody and nothing. We can both pretend it never happened.”

“What?! No! Why would I -”

Rio interrupted. “Because then I’ll forget I saw you practically kiss a blade of dry grass. While holding a full conversation with it.”

Silvio’s fists tightened hard enough that his rings pinched. “That’s blackmail!”

“Is it? Hmmmm.” Rio grinned. “I don’t know. Sounds like a fair exchange. I mean, imagine what the merchants would say if they knew you were losing your mind? Nobody would want to do business with such a risky partner.”

The worst part of this, Silvio thought, was that the mutt was right. People were strangely skittish. A rumor could destroy an empire. “Fine.”

“What was that?”

“I said fine! It’s a deal!” He felt his shoulders slump. Defeat, thought Silvio, was almost worse than death. The only silver lining was knowing he’d get out and have plenty of opportunity to teach the mutt a lesson some other day.

A few minutes later, a rope ladder tumbled down the shaft. He climbed up, moving as fast as he could just in case Rio tried to change the deal. But his brother didn’t renege, and even held out a hand to help him up the last bit. Silvio slapped it away, of course, but part of him appreciated the gesture even if he would never admit it. 

“Not even a thank you?” Rio raised an eyebrow. His too-similar sky blue eyes met the sea blue of Silvio’s gaze. 

“Not unless I can say it with my fist. Now get outta my way. I need a drink.”

#ikemen prince #ikepri #ikepri silvio #silvio ricci #fanfiction #fanfic #otome #otome guys

[yakumtsaki]

Welcome back, beloved readers! Things have finally calmed down for me so it’s time to inflict this update on the world. When we last left off, BATSHIT FELINA SMASHED VICTORIA’S URN

-WHY IS IT NOT BROKEN?!?

Because it turned out there’s a cheat to repair urns, HA. In your face!

-I BROKE THAT THING FAIR AND SQUARE

Felina seriously, GO TO HELL. I freaked out thinking I’d have to either quit without saving (hadn’t saved since before SUGAR DIED) or I’d have to deal with Victoria’s missing character file. You’re not allowed anywhere near the mausoleum again! 

-THAT’S FINE, I’LL JUST TRAP MYSELF IN THIS WALL UNTIL I DIE AND THEN YOU’LL BE SORRY

Bruh. I’ve had enough of this house, between the walls of death..

..the eternal yard fire..

..and the fact everyone is afflicted with a gross cold they keep passing around despite the fact I gave them medicine-

-I, a retired Mayor, was clearly the right choice to make medicine.

Well I thought you might do something useful for once, Shajar, but joke’s on me. Point is, it’s time to gtfo..

..to our new gigantic house! Look at all our crap on the lawn, and yes, I’m referring to the sims. 

I unpaused for 1 second to check something and Barf and Failina (Barflina?) have re-become enemies?? Did you stop being enemies at some point because I completely missed it. 

-We did but new house, new us!

It’s done! I went all out on this house for no discernible reason, let me give you the grand tour:

First floor! Man this house is a nightmare. 

Foyer! 

Luxurious pet room!

Kitchen!

Dining room!

Gambling room Library!

And living room!

Moving on to the second floor, Cyn and Sophie/Shajar’s bedrooms I kept the basically same as in the last house. The unfinished bedroom is Sugar and Sandy’s for reasons that will be explained shortly. 

I really feel I made this house too nice for the Unions but what can you do. 

Felina and Barth’s rooms in their ~signature colors~

And Liz and Sophito’s bedroom which is clearly all Liz.

Finally, on the little rooms on the third floor are the music room that @microscotch​ decorated❤️, and a lame room where we keep all our career rewards!

The mausoleum, which is unchanged other than I moved the pet graves in it and put them under each generation..

..and this is the yard! I kept it pretty much the same except larger-

-and I added a lake! We’re all done, time to unpause and enjoy long, safe lives in our new house..

OMG WTF

-YOU CAN’T ADD A FLAMETHROWER IN THE MIDDLE OF A FOUNTAIN, MORON -EVERYONE KNOWS WATER CATCHES FIRE 

BRO. When I tell you guys the entire family almost perished in a FOUNTAIN FIRE. Incredibly fitting cause of death. Thankfully the firefighter heroically saved us and all is well! Now I can’t wait to play a billion sims and pets on this gigantic cc-filled lot with no further problems whatsoever!

Alright then! I had a feeling it might come to this, Sugar take Sandy and gtfo.

-I will but be warned, our absence won’t solve anything! 

Ya, it sure DIDN’T. GROSS. Finally I turned off shaders and it went away, ok Sug, you and Sandy can move back in..

..and we can begin the ENDLESS task of getting all the skill points you lost to zombiehood back. And once you’re back at the top of your career and Sandy tops hers you are OUTTA HERE, you hear me???

-Ya ya, how many times are you gonna kick me out and move me back in? Admit it already, you LOVE ME. 

Ok ‘love’ is a strong word-

-YOU CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT ME.

LET’S MOVE ON

It’s our first night in the new house and this is how Sophie and Shajar sleep. 

-Close enough for me. -I’d like another wall between us, actually.

#itsover

-Ah, nothing like that first sip of whiskey before school!

Ya Barth, I’m a little concerned about your aspiration bar.

-Ah, nothing like the first four glasses of whiskey after shcool!

Ya ok, we’re calling the matchmaker this weekend.

Jimbo (the puppy we adopted to mate with Veronica, I don’t remember if I introduced him) grows up and he looks ICONIC

The difference between their necks LOL

It’s Sophito’s birthday and Liz’s is in a few days, so it’s time to get started on their death portraits. What a cheerful gift, Cyn! 

Family reunion! Look at everyone all together, getting along..

..even Gunther came but completely ignored the party and went straight for the ballet bar, which legit made me emo, idk if you guys remember during generation 1 how obsessed he and Daniel were with the ballet bar, awww❤️ Alright, back to the party, go on Soph, blow your candles-

OH FFS

-SCREW YOU, FAILINA, IT’S BEYOND TIME TO HAVE OUR FIRST FIGHT IN THE NEW HOUSE  -AGREED, AND I CAN THINK OF NO BETTER MOMENT THAN THE ONE RIGHT BEFORE OUR FATHER BLOWS HIS CANDLES IN FRONT OF OUR ENTIRE FAMILY

Ok are you done?? Is this over?? Let’s try the cake again, Soph-

-Sorry, it’s time for me to finally reconnect with iVan, huhu!💗 -Awww, I’m so happy for you, grandma Cyn!

-DON’T BE TOO HAPPY, FAILINA -FUCKING BRAT, I HAD MY BACK TURNED

OK YOU KNOW WHAT, FORGET IT

HERE, HE’S GROWN UP. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SOPHITO 

-WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS FAMILY~👻

Ya idk, Victoria, you tell me, it’s your amazing DNA at work. 

-YOU’RE AN EMBARASSMENT, BARTHOLOMEW  -Well that hurts, grandma! 

-Thankfully nothing a drink won’t fix!

Oh my- I’d like to clarify at this point that this goddamn party is still going on-

-when this simultaneous pet and human fight occurs:

It’s Jimbo vs Shinok..

..and Barflina vs human dignity.

-Oh no, babe, I can’t look! -How could this happen, we were such involved parents!!

And at the moment where Barth throws his sister through a window, the matchmaker rewards us with a genie lamp for treading the arduous path of excellence. I don’t know about you, but what I take from this is we are perfect and should never attempt to improve ourselves in any way! 

#gen 4 #ts2 #long post

[aleksa-sims]

RL Simself Story ( 18+)

I was at N.'s. He told me what was going on with that girl Stephanie, his (ex-) fiancée. However, I was alone that morning. Nico had a match. I was still in bed until the doorbell rang. I wondered who that was? I didn’t open the door. This is not my place. I just went to the window and saw a pretty, young woman looking in my direction. I knew it was her!😓💔 She looked up at the windows to me a second time, before she got in her car and left. Maybe she saw me?

N.’s dog came up to me in the bedroom after it rang. I think he thought I was scared? I told him, I'm fine, just a bit sad. He always knew when I wasn’t well. Atm I was sure that Nico’s dog remembered me.🧡 I hugged him & said, "Let’s go for a walk together like we used to.".. I went to a pharmacy to buy a pregnancy test. I didn’t want to wait anymore and I have to tell Nico!

A few hours later, N. came home. I heard he wasn’t alone, so I went downstairs to see what was going on?

Carefully I hid behind the curtains, to watch who those 2 guys were, who came with him.

Nico: Yo, cut the shit! I've got someone here, you get me? Why did you two morons even come up with me?

Martin: Well, I gotta piss, man.

Nico: Then go and get outta here!... And you, dude? What you doing there?

Damian: Just check myself out 😏. ..What's the hurry? Like... you wanna get rid of us.

Okay, Damian & Martin, 2 of his team mates. I really didn’t feel like awkward small talk. That one Christmas party 2 years ago was enough for me! Just saying Damian's stupid twin sister. 😡 Anyway. That guy Martin came back from the bathroom. He wanted to know who I was, while Damian was still busy admiring himself in the mirror. 🤦‍♀️😒

Martin: Well, I'm done! ... But-... c'mon, who's your new... mistress?

Nico: Mistress? I’m not having a fling, and I didn’t cheat.

Martin: You kept texting that girl in Italy. You didn’t give a shit about Stephanie. That’s cheating too, dude.

Nico: The fuck-...

Damian (to M.): Can't you keep your fucking trap shut?... Sorry, N.! I told him.

Martin: That wasn’t an insult or anything. I just think it's a bit..... blatantly & rash to dump your girl just for a fuck.

Nico: What makes you think it’s just a fuck for me?

Martin: It's that kind of vibe I got. The way you talked about her earlier, you know?

Damian: He’s right! Why all that secrecy? Just say who she is!

Nico: I wouldn’t have let you into my place, if I hid her!! But yea, I admit... I didn’t expect this to happen. I don't wanna hurt my gir-... Stephanie!  I really struggled to end it with her. I thought it would be easier but seeing her so.... fucked up & sad also got me down. It hurt me too, okay! I love her.

Damian: Then.... get her back, man.

Nico: Yea.... I-.. I can't!.. I simply can't! She.... can’t give me what I want. 😕

Martin: Stop thinking with your dick and get your girl back!

Damian: That chick must be damn hot. Tell us who she is, dude.

Nico: You know her anyway! 🤷‍♀️So cut the shit and fuck off.

Damian: Yo, don't tell me you’re screwing my sister. 🤣

Nico: Your sister?... I'm not that desperate. 😄

Damian: Shit, I think she overheard us.

Martin (to D.): Let's head out, man.

Damian: You, started that ball rolling and now you wanna fuck off?

Nico (to me): Babe? Come to us, you don’t have to hide.

Damian: Damn, that's your..... ex....

Damian: Heyyy! Sorry Aleksa, I didn’t know it was you. You want a hug? 😬

Me: Like our last encounter? 🤨

Damian: But you’re not gonna start crying again, huh?

Me: That's kind of your thing, right? Make girls cry and hug them.

Damian: You know, I hate making girls cry.

Me: You look so much like... someone.... I know. 😔 Almost creepy. I didn’t notice it before because ...yea, I didn’t meet and know him yet then.

I was speechless when Damian stood in front of me. He and Daniel look totally alike. Now that I missed Daniel’s face so much, I noticed it. However, atm I had other worries in my head. Nico and his Stephanie! Yesterday Nico told me about her issues. And he....asked me for forgiveness. He couldn’t let her down. Her family was away for a few days and she threatened Nico that she would hurt herself. Which she allegedly did and tried in the past. So he allowed her to stay with him until her parents came back. He was afraid to leave her alone. I was totally disappointed and mad. I told him, that if she comes back here to him, I’m gonna end this with us!!! She will probably sleep with him or try it and I didn’t trust him. Even though N. promised me he wouldn’t sleep with her. He just didn’t want to leave her alone the next three days, but between him and her it’s over, he said. STILL! I had no confidence in promises made to me by men, who supposedly loved me. So I wanted to go home, but N. stopped me. He suggested that we both, Stephanie & I stay with him for the next 3 days, until her family comes home. Thats CRAZY, I told him! However, he gave in and meant, he’d come up with something else for her, but he doesn’t want to lose me. And well, I stayed with him. But as I just heard what he thought about her and me, I wanted to leave again! 😞 Agh yea, I’ll tell next time how it went on. It's just too much for one post. And also Stephanie will be back and I'm gonna see Dennis. 🤦‍♀️Sandra will talk me into something totally stupid. I mean, she was just trying to encourage me. It was my stupid idea, to drag Dennis into that.....mess. But he also wanted it!!! 🤷‍♀️

Previous/ Next

#ts4 #sims 4 #sims 4 story #myrlgameplay #rl story #simself #18+ content #cw cheating

[ventiswampwater]

do you think Bo really fucking loves orange juice or was he just looking for quick sugars to counter the blood loss?? also why did he think to do that. does he think getting nailed with an arrow to the chest is the same as donating to the Red Cross?? does he know what the Red Cross is??? whose waffle is that?? how do u just leave a waffle in there?? I bet he cooked it once and it wasn't cooked enough. so he pushed it down again for another round and then it got burnt. and he looked at it and said "dadgummit not again" and left it there to be someone else's problem. and it was the last one and Vincent came upstairs and all the waffles were gone except that one. and he sighed and looked at it for a long time. and when he saw it again in the toaster while he's fixing his damn face and his dumbass sweaty brother is like "lulul god n mama n stuff" Vincent was like. I've never seen the ocean. I bet I could drive to the ocean in, what, four hours?? buy a box of waffles on the way home. this bitch is still talking. you know he talks to himself all the time. he does an Elvis impression in the mirror sometimes. it's not good. I'm gonna do it. I'm going to the ocean. motherfucker drank all the juice too. goddammit. I hate this fucking family. wish I was adopted like Lester. "there's two more." yeah I know. idiot. there were six. what have you been doing?? having sexy garage time?? christ you suck. how are we related. where's the guy with the crossbow I'd like to have a word. he needs to work on his aim. I'll put you in a headlock and let him practice. fuck you're sweaty you smell like ass. stay ten feet away from me please. yeah whatever I'll help you I guess. already been helping but it's fine, mr. never-leave-here-without-me. mr. mayor of wax town. I crush the seniors at bingo at the country club every Wednesday and you haven't even noticed I'm gone. too busy playing every single role in Our Town by yourself. moron.

JDSFHJFHSJHFSDJHFJHFJD MEG

BACKWASHING INTO THIS ORANGE JUICE!!!!

HEATHEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

when I watched this movie for the first time last year I entirely thought that man FULLY picked up a jug of lukewarm tang off the counter and just slurped it down. bc I missed the sound of him opening the fridge jsfhjhdsfjhdsf. and I was like GODDAMN THIS SET DESIGN IS OFF THE SHITS THIS IS REALLY HOW MEN BE LIVIN. HJFDSHJHFDSJ LUKEWARM TANG ON THE COUNTER

he's so stupid dumb delirious in that scene I've watched it 37874949328 times. just like. immediately deciding to YANK that shit through his arm hsdghgfsdhgfdhs. all of the blood that was channeled directly into his murder boner in the previous scenes has made him lightheaded and he is not THINKING CLEARLY hjdsjhfsjdhsd the fact that he doesn't think to snip it off. just PULLS that THANG straight through his stupid dumb idiot arm!!! the nerve damage!!! he is so sexy for that I love a dumbass man more than anything fr

VINCENT PONDERING THE LACK OF EGGO WAFFLES BC BO WAS TOO BUSY SEDUCING HIS TOOTHPASTE STAINS IN THE MIRROR TO NOT BURN THE LAST ONE JSDJDFHJFDS

sexy garage time is taking me out jhsdajhdsajhajsdhjdsh imagine all the years of vincent being responsible for the majority of the killcount bc bo goes oogabooga I want sum fuck on my silly goofy sex swing in my gas station jsdhjfdhsjfsdhj

vincent's turning wade into a wax sculpture and chopping dalton's head off and javelining a pole through paige's head and meanwhile. bo is blasting marilyn manson and having unsuccesful murderfuck preamble in his stupid basement jfdshjfhdsjhfdsj

BO JUST STINKING OF SWEAT AND VOMIT AND BLOOD and vincent tryin to maneuver himself away from him sdhjfdshjfdsh like bitch!!! I tried to check on ur fuckin injuries!! and u told me to GIT??? like I'm a dog???? and now ur sweaty diseased sickly self is leaning over me tryin 2 talk about how sexy u are and what god took away from me??? fuck outta here lmao

dsjhgfjdshjfdsh vincent playing bingo is so fuckin funny to me I'm cryin

#this is the magnum opus. these are divine words !!!! PPL!!! #hdfsjhfjhjfdshjdf this is sending me to the moon #the elvis impersonation jsdfhjhfdjhdfs thank yaaaa thank yaaaa very muuuuch #and it's just so horrendously bad and awful djshjdajsda #ilysm this ask is gonna be screen-printed on my cerebral cortex forever fr #sinclair brainrot hours

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

How I think different natural disasters (a long with other forms of severe weather) affect the states cuz why not:

Wildfires/fires in general (not house fires tho @simpyfrog i was mostly joking about that lol. Pls give me my fire privileges back pls pls pls-)

They will get burns all over their body, and the worse the fire, the worse the burns. Also the bigger the fire, the bigger the burns. The West (+Texas) have the worst burns/burn scars. Also sometimes breathing is a no and they will choke on smoke. And their vision will be kinda blurry and from the outside their eyes will look a bit cloudy (how cloudy depends on the amount of smoke).

Earthquakes:

Balance is a no. The state affected will be VERY shaky and be in a lot of pain. Along with bruising, they will have a long gash across their back. Alaska and California have the worst of this.

Severe Thunderstorms:

The states don't get too affected by them, but sometimes they will receive a big enough shock from the lightning that they get knocked out and are left with some burns that look like lightning streaks. Also sometimes if there is power outages, let's take Texas for example, he wont be able to use certain electric things, such as light switches, microwaves, electric stoves, ect...(tho he found a way around it and wears leather gloves if he needs too). Also, I'm gonna do a silly and say that they can shock people to tease them.

Hurricanes:

Throwing up water, sometimes blood. The state will be very cold and kinda clammy and will feel like they are drowning. They will be VERY dizzy and throw up a lot. They will most likely pass out at some point and wake up covered in bruises, lightning-strike burns, some cuts, and other various small injuries. Florida, Louisiana, Texas, and basically any Gulf Coast state has had the worst of these. (Texas and Loui tho- the Google machine told me that Galveston, Harvey and Katrina were the most costly ones-)

Tornado

Dizzy yes. Balance no. The affected state will be covered in bruises (the bigger the damaged area, the bigger the bruise.). Blurry vision and a migraine also will occur. Texas, Oklahoma, and the Midwest have the worst of these (Tornado Alley).

Acid Rain:

Again, they don't really get too affected by this, they will just have some pretty rough looking burns. NY (haha this fool thought he would be safe from me-), NH, VT, and ME have the worst burn scars from this.

Dust Storms:

I don't have much for this one lol. Im thinking grainy-feeling skin and a really really dry throat, but I don't really have anything else.

Heat waves:

Fever, a lot of sweating, and dizziness that can lead to passing out. Texas, Loui, and Sippi are currently getting BAKED and not in the good way :(

==========================================

(Now take some weather quote thingys (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)

~

(During the Great Galveston Hurricane)

Gov, coming to check on Texas: Hey Texas are you doing alright?

Texas:*looks like he's gonna throw up* Y-Yes. Don't worry about me.

Gov: *not believing him* Are you sure?

Texas: Y-yea-*throws up a bunch of water*

Gov: Thought so.

~

California walking downstairs to get some water during an earthquake:

California: *proceeds to fill down the stairs and lay there for 15 minutes*

~

(after a really bad acid rain)

Mass: New York get yer ass outta the tree and let me take care of the burns before they get infected!!

NY: No f*ck off!! They don't even hurt!!

Mass: You were literally on the verge of tears, moron!! So quit lyin' and get down here right now!!

NY: No go take care of NH and VT!!

Mass: I already did, and they weren't as damn stubborn as you're being right now!! *has already texted Texas to come get him out of the tree*

NY: I don't give a sh*t how stubborn they were!! Also I ain't stubborn-*screams when two arms randomly grab him from behind*

Texas: *is now holding him captive* Yes you are. You are a stubborn little Yankee.

NY: Texas you damn traitor!! Let me go!!!

Texas: No can do, partner. Yer comin' down and letting yer brother help ya. He's gonna be gentle, so calm down!!

NY: *sigh-whine* I give up....

Texas: Atta boy.

~

(during a fire)

Cali: Hehe. ✨arson✨

~

(during Katrina)

Loui: I'm fine sha.

Florida: *hugging him close* Sir no you most definitely are not!! You are way too cold-

Loui: *throws up blood and water* Uh sorry bout dat sha...

Florida: And you're sick, mi amor!! Go to bed right now!!

Loui: B-but-

Florida: No buts!! Bed. Now. I will drag you there if I have to-

Loui: *passes tf out*

Florida: GODDANGIT-

~

(during the heatwave that is currently killing us all-)

Gov: *walks into Texas's room and sees Louisiana passed tf out, Sippi on the verge of it, and Texas just laying on his bed and staring at the ceiling and contemplating on playing Russian roulette with a pistol*

Gov: *walks back out*

~

#welcome to the table #welcome to the statehouse #ben brainard #wttt #wttsh

[honeyhatake]

Warnings- glory hole, oral (male receiving), smut with plot, bi-sanji, if you homophobic or under 18 get outta here! go on! get!

Word Count- 3.3k

———————————💕———————————

Being the gentleman I am, I like to treat my lovers right. Care for their every need, make sure they feel loved and valued. I do this in any and every way I can. Taking my time, trying not to indulge too much in myself.

My lovers are very few and far in between, but I cherish every one of them. I’m not the type of man to go for a quick fuck, giving in to animalistic behaviors. No, that’s for uncivilized morons who can’t keep it in their pants long enough to pleasure a woman.

Though, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t get a little selfish sometimes. Especially if it had been a while. Today was one of those days in fact. Eyes roaming a little too much on my beautiful crew mates, any touch of the skin seemingly setting me ablaze. I craved release, I so desperately needed it and I’d do anything to get it. Usually some alone time would fix all my problems, unfortunately that was not the case for today. No, today, I needed the real deal.

When we dropped anchor at our next island, everyone decided to do their own thing. My loves Nami and Robin went shopping. Chopper, Usopp and Luffy went exploring. Zoro going off on his own, which was never a good idea. Then Franky and Brook stayed behind to watch the ship. This was the perfect time for me to go out, do some shopping of my own, and satisfy my sensual craving.

On every island we went to there was at least one sex shop, or brothel. I didn’t like the idea of paying for sex, or using a beautiful woman in that manner. It made me feel like the scum of the earth in fact. Though desperate times called for desperate measures.

After a while of searching, and asking a couple shady gentlemen, I found myself at my destination. This sex shop in particular was something for those with a particular fetish. The men who loved the idea of fucking or getting sucked off by someone entirely unknown. You don’t see them, and they don’t see you. A glory hole if you will.

The idea had my whole body running hot. My mind is racing with possibilities. I preferred to see my sexual partners. Yet I couldn’t turn down a naughty new experience. I was feeling more selfish today anyways.

———————————💕———————————

Walking into the establishment it was definitely shady. The building was tiny and had no markings. I ducked to get through the door, and had to look down at the woman sitting in a sort of concession booth. All of this made my stomach churn, and I can feel myself start to sweat from nerves. For a split second I thought to turn back, go and get off how I normally do… before I knew it I had already pulled out my wallet and paid my way in.

This was so wrong, but I could already feel myself straining in my jeans. The room was decent size with about 6 different holes to choose from. With luck on my side there were only a couple guys in there. The smell of cigarettes and sex permeated my scenses almost making me feel light headed. I cleared my throat and tugged on my tie, putting out a cigarette of my own. At least today I didn’t have to worry about tasting like an ashtray.

Walking further into the room I could hear women’s moans and men groaning. My heart raced as I looked around trying to decide what I wanted today. I looked at the vacant holes in the walls and bit my lip. It was very rare for me to receive a blow job, and it was definitely one of the most selfish ways a man could get off. I walked towards the wall, and looked at the two holes. It was hard to choose, especially not knowing who was on the other side.

Behind one of them I swore I could hear some faint whispering. I pressed my head and ear against the wall trying to listen. When I heard nothing I decided to speak a little myself. “Hello? Love? You okay in there? I hope you’re okay with all of this!” I wait a little, thinking maybe I’d get a response. Though I knew that’d ruin the immersion, she was most likely also ordered not to speak. For a second I heard some shuffling and a bit more whispering. Maybe she was nervous! Maybe this was her first day!

“Okay my love! Don’t worry, you don’t have to respond. Just take your time.” I slowly unbuckled my belt and pushed the front of my pants down just enough to pull myself out. I was throbbing at this point, tip bright red. I groaned when the cool air hit it, too damn sensitive. With a deep breath I tried to keep myself steady. “Alright dear, it’s coming in now, go ahead when you’re ready.”

I push myself carefully through the hole in the wall, my legs spread and my body pressed up against it. At first there was nothing, I didn’t even hear a sound. It was almost as if the person on the other side had completely disappeared. I knew they were still there though, I could sense them. After a few moments, I heard some shuffling and then I felt a warm breath on my member. I hum softly, balling my hands into fists against the wall, nearly gritting my teeth.

“That’s it, go ahead my love, don’t be shy!”

Just like that, my cock is enveloped in the wet warmth of their mouth. I immediately moaned out. Feeling the wet muscle make it’s way around my tip. God it felt so soft, so warm, just so good. If I didn’t steady my breathing and keep my cool I knew I’d burst in her mouth right then and there. The urge to start moving rolled over my body, though I didn’t want to make her feel pressured.

Mere seconds go by and I feel them pull off. I worry a bit, though my anxiety is soon soothed by the warmth of her mouth yet again. Her lips wrapped so perfectly around me it was almost as if she was made for me. I groaned and bit my lip hard.

“That’s it, good girl! Your tongue feels so good…” I pressed my forehead against the wall, feeling a sharp breath blow out their nose. Then without warning, they sucked harder. Letting me slide all the way down her throat. My moans were uncontrollable now. She was sucking me in so good I knew I wasn’t going to last long. “Agh god! Slow down princess, you’re gonna make me cum early!” I let out a whine, and they just hummed around me. Bobbing back and forth with such ease. This definitely wasn’t her first time.

My mystery lover was soon pulling away yet again. I gasped for air and let my member throb, immediately missing the contact. Precum was leaking out of the tip and dripping on the floor. My body was covered in sweat, and I knew my cheeks were a bright shade of pink by now.

“Oh please my love! Your mouth feels like heaven! Won’t you please let me finish! What did I do to get such an angel like you!”

Through the wall I could hear a bit of whispering, shortly followed by a finger running over my slit. I gasped, then braced myself as their fingers slid down my cock. They were surprisingly firm, yet so so warm, and just as gentle as I imagined they’d be. She gently stroked me with her fingers as her mouth came to my tip yet again. Licking back and forth over the nerve at the tip of my cock.

With my eyes rolling back I knew I couldn’t hold back anymore. Gently I hammered my fist into the wall and let out a breathy moan. Just as I was about to burst, I could have sworn I heard a whisper of “cum for me…” on the other side of the wall. Whole body tensing, I came into my pretty mystery girl's mouth. They hummed and moaned all around it, and it made me so happy to know she loved this just as much as I did.

Feeling myself getting emotional as she pulled away, I started to thank her profusely. Praising her, making sure she knew how much I appreciated her work. Wishing I could take her away from here, make her feel just as good as I did. Yet I knew she couldn’t, I knew she wouldn’t, and I knew I’d never see her again. Wiping a single tear off my face, I slowly pulled myself from the wall. That was undoubtedly the best orgasm I had ever had.

Even though I was happy, my craving was satisfied, I still felt a lingering sense of loneliness and hunger for something much more. These were feelings I just couldn’t deal with right now. I came here for one urge only, nothing more.

On the other side of the wall I heard some rather loud shuffling. I put myself back together, and pressed my hand into the wall. “Thank you for everything ma cher, you were truly amazing. If you’d ever like me to repay the favor, I’ll be docked on the east side of the island. Our figure head is a lion, you’ll know it when you see it! Take care my love, thank you again.”

Little did I know that my words fell on deaf ears.

———————————💕———————————

Soon after my mission was complete, I made my way to some local shops and picked up everything I needed. With a smile on my face I soon arrived back at the ship. There I saw Nami and Robin had made it back, as well as Zoro. The girls were looking at all the stuff they bought, while Zoro sat on the steps zoned out.

Naturally I gushed over my loves, too distracted to fully notice Zoros stare. After telling the girls to show me their new outfits later, I made my way to the kitchen. I felt Zoro get up and follow me. Right as I was about to yell at him to make himself useful and help me put stuff away, I heard our captain yelling about being hungry. He must have just got back. We both groaned for what I thought was the same reason, and I made sure to yell loud enough he could hear me.

“You’ll get your damn dinner soon! Just be patient and wait like everyone else!” I hear Luffy groan loudly and run around the ship. As soon as I was about to turn my attention back to Moss head, he was gone. Useless idiot probably didn’t want to be put to work so he went to hide. Bet that jerk wanted to start a fight with me anyways. While mumbling to myself I put all the groceries away and immediately got to work on dinner. My afternoon events had surprisingly made me feel hungry.

———————————💕———————————

At dinner everyone was in a good mood. Brook was singing, Usopp, Luffy, Chopper and Franky were dancing, and my girls were smiling and giggling as well. It was perfect. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt this relaxed. Yet, something was off. It was like someone was missing. I looked around at the dinner table, and immediately spotted an empty chair. That’s when it hit me, Marimo was nowhere to be seen.

With a raised eyebrow I crossed my arms and looked to Luffy. “Hey! Where’s Zoro? Didn’t you tell him dinner was ready?”

“Huh? Oh yeah! He said he didn’t wanna be bothered, so I said I’d just eat his food. He didn’t seem to mind!” With a laugh Luffy continued to dance and gulp down any food that was in front of him.

Zoro never said no to a meal, and he was acting strange earlier. I knew I shouldn’t have to worry about him, but what’s his deal? With a grumble I leave the kitchen and make my way up to the crows nest. Of course he’s there, lifting those ginormous weights like usual.

I glare at him as I stand on the ladder inches away from him. It was obvious he knew I was there, yet he chose to ignore me. “Hey asshole! Dinners ready! Come eat before Luffy eats it all! I won’t make you anything extra.”

Zoros back tenses and he drops the weight. I stumble on the stairs as the crows nest rattles from the impact. “Hey!”

“I'm not hungry, leave me alone.” Stepping over his weight I watched him grab a towel and wipe his face. Not hungry my ass! I climb into the room and shove my hands into my pockets.

“Since when are you not hungry? What’s wrong, did you eat already?” I glared at the back of his head. His body was covered in sweat and his breathing was ragged, back still tense. Nudging his boot with my shoe I tried to get him to look at me.

“I said leave me alone curly, I’m not in the mood.” Jesus Christ, who pissed in his corn flakes? Sure as shit wasn’t me.

“Alright, how ‘bout this. I sit here, and you just tell me what’s wrong when you’re ready. I’m not leaving until you do.” Sitting on the bench I looked up at him, briefly seeing the side of his face before he turned. An almost growl erupted from his chest as he rolled his shoulders cracking his neck. “Look, I don’t know what you’re deal is but-”

“Would you stop! I don’t want to hear you speak. I don’t even want to see you or be near you right now. I’m doing everything I can to hold back, so just…” Zoro's tone was teetering somewhere between a yell and a plea. He sounded almost desperate to have me leave.

“Then don’t hold back! I’m not going any-”

“Was that you?” Zoro cut me off abruptly. This whole time, still not looking at me.

“What?” I raised a brow looking over his body, trying to find some sort of clue in his body language. Uncomfortable was the best way I could describe it at this moment.

“… in the- the glory hole.”

My heart jumped into my throat and I felt just as nauseous as I did when I walked into that place. How did he know? Was he there? I didn’t see anyone with green hair. I grabbed the hair on the back of my head trying to figure out what was going on here. There’s no way he was there, Zoro would never go to a place like that.

“Well!? Was it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about! How did you even-”

“God dammit. Alright. I fucked up! I needed some cash so I saw a place that was paying a shit ton of beri to work for just a day. I didn’t realize what the place was until they shoved me into a room. They told me not to speak to the clients and that I’d have to stay until nightfall. Needless to say I didn’t do that. Anyways, what I’m trying to say. That was me, and I’m 100% certain that that was you.” Zoro rambled fast, then took a step back to turn around. His arms were now crossed as he looked at me. Cheeks flushed, jaw clenched, eyebrows furrowed.

Realization hit me like a water train. My heart started to race, and I immediately started to sweat. Th-that wasn’t a beautiful woman? But- she was so soft? I looked at him flabbergasted. Not knowing what to say or where to even go from here. How does one recover from accidently having their best friend suck them off?

Zoros cleared his throat, making me come back to reality for a bit. Finally starting to find words. “So. That was you then. You um, just sucked me off, just like that?” Leaning back on the bench I laid one arm over the back while my free hand covered my mouth. Doing anything to avoid his gaze. I get why he was being so weird now.

“Yeah, I did. I'm sorry. I needed the cash, and they locked me in there. To be honest I’m kind of glad it was only you.” I looked up at him again and saw him looking at his boots. Hands now in his pockets, and his cheeks were bright red.

With a deep breath I stood. To my own surprise, I wasn’t bothered by this as much as I probably should have been. This must have been just as embarrassing for him. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that it still was the best orgasm I had ever had. With a smirk I looked at him and wet my lips. “Hey, it’s okay, no harm no foul. Did you get paid at least?”

Zoro sighed and shook his head, hand moving to his mouth. “No, because I broke out of there they didn’t pay me.”

My hand slapped over my own mouth as I tried to hold back laughter. Inevitably I failed and started laughing as I spoke. “Hahah oh my god! So you had to suck me off! And you didn’t get paid for it? Oh shit ahaha. Tough luck buddy, guess I-”

“Can-it cook! Be lucky I even let you cum! I could have bit your dick off the moment you stuck it in the hole! You’re the loser who went there in the first place!”

Wiping my tears away, I tried to stop laughing. He did have a point. I was fortunate that he did help me out, even though I was envisioning a woman the entire time. “Alright, alright!” I cleared my throat. “Okay, well I guess, thank you. Even though you ended up doing it for no reason. Did you uh, did you at least enjoy it?” I smirked at him, expecting him to start yelling yet again.

With a roll of his eyes, he licked his lips and shrugged. “Sure, whatever. You didn’t taste bad, so I guess it could have been worse.” While he spoke I thought back to when I came, and my once mystery lover hummed contently all around my cock. “What would it matter anyways? It’s not like it’s gonna happen again!” Alright, now why would he say that? I laugh through my nose and glare at him.

“Who the hell said that? That was the best orgasm I ever had. I’d be an idiot not to want to do that again.”

Eyes blinking rapidly, Zoro looked at me now. He damn near looked like a kid in a candy store. A better comparison being Zoro in a sword store. “Wait really? So you’d let me do that again? Like, without the wall?”

I grin and shake my head. “I mean yeah, why not. I’d have to return the favor though, since you didn’t get paid the first time.” I laugh briefly and Zoro looks at me with bright red cheeks.

“Are you sure? I don’t think I’d be able to hold back if-”

“Zoro, I’m more than sure.” Without hesitating I took another step grabbing hold of his arm and pulling him in. He tried to pull away, but gave in at the last second. I pressed my lips to his and felt him melt into me.

My free hand cupped the side of his face, deepening the kiss. Lips moving together so in sync it was like they were made to be together. Pulling away slowly, I looked at his heavy eyes. Completely glossed over, trying to catch his breath. I couldn’t believe I never noticed how beautiful he was until now. I never thought he’d ever be interested in me like this. Maybe I found my something more after all.

“Next time, I’ll make sure you get paid up front.”

———————————💕———————————

Thank you for reading! This story was super fun to write! I hope you all enjoy it just as much as I did. I have plans for a part two, and Zoros perspective of this one! Feel free to scream at me in the comments, and let me know if you wanna be tagged in the next part 💕💕💕

Tags: @ven3us

#sanji vinsmoke #vinsmoke sanji #sanji #sanji smut #one piece #one piece smut #op anime #roronoa zoro #zoro #zosan #ship fic

[kivaember]

ac6 drabble: abort

last one before i go to bed (i was planning on doing more but work wiped me out today sorry...) but i have to do @steelhazeortus a solid and give them the iguazu/volta that they clearly crave (their prompt being "adding to my last unhinged reply: Volta lives but make it gay (I’m obsessed. Sorry)").

here ya go buddy

abort

Iguazu had his hand on the eject lever the moment the first round from that Juggernaut bitch had slammed into the ground less than a 100m away from him, the blastwave powerful enough it made even HEAD BRINGER's frame shudder with the force of it.

He'd looked out across the battlefield, across the hundreds and hundreds of metres of kill zones that lay between him and the Wall. MTs with rocket launchers, at least twenty long-range cannons twitchy enough to shoot a fly out of the sky, the fucking JUGGERNAUT raining hellfire on any poor fuck who was stupid enough to amble into its crosshairs, and the GODDAMN GATLING GUNS SCREAMING ROUNDS DOWN RANGE LIKE IT WAS GOING OUT OF STYLE-

you've gotta be shitting me, he had thought, in a light-headed, near hysterical sort of way, you have to be absolutely shitting me.

The supporting squad of suicidally loyal MTs were already getting shredded into scrap metal, yelling at making Michigan proud even as they died to bullet fire. Volta, the fucking IDIOT, was gunning full steam ahead, clearly trying to build the momentum for an assault boost over the defensive trench - Iguazu could make the tactical leaps to understand what he was aiming for: get behind the gatling guns, past the smaller rocket launchers, use the solid tower blocks as cover-

Iguazu was a survivor through and through. He took one look at that battlefield, realised the futility of it all in a split second, and thought fuck this shit i'm out.

His hand was on the eject lever. He even pulled on it a little, until it felt resistance. One more tug, and he'd be launched out of HEAD BRINGER and be walking back to the emergency rendevouz point. He'd rather take Michigan bawling into his face for being a cowardly little runt than heroically becoming an ashy smear on the floor to gain the Redguns absolutely jackshit.

His hand was on the eject lever.

But.

Later, Iguazu wouldn't really be able to explain why he didn't pull it the second he touched down. It defied common sense and his own selfish nature. But his gaze had been fixed on Volta stupidly charging ahead, as he always did, obnoxiously confident in his AC's manouverability and thick-plated armour to see him through anything. Iguazu had watched him charging forwards, acknowledged his tactical decision, and just thought the moron's gonna die.

That's fine. Volta was free to go to his grave feeling like he'd accomplished something when in fact it was just a pointless death for a bunch of old windbags who didn't give one flying fuck about the Redguns entirely, so long as they achieved their bottom line. Iguazu wasn't going to go the same way, though. He was getting out of Rubicon, one way or another. He wasn't dying here.

But.

...

His hand...

...

He let go of the eject lever.

"I must be outta my mind...!" Iguazu hissed under his breath, sending HEAD BRINGER forwards into a charge after Volta, the whistle-whine of overhead tank rounds and missiles making his pulse rate hit the fucking goddamn stratosphere.

YOU'RE GOING TO DIE! his survival instinct screamed at him, WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU STUPID FUCKING IDIOT?!?!

He ignored it. He just followed Volta - followed him over the trench, narrowly avoiding getting blown out of the sky when the Juggernaut adjusted its aiming slightly to try and pre-empty his leap. He landed heavily, whispering "shit shit shit" under his breath like he was praying to Jesus Christ himself to reach down and pluck him from this situation that was entirely of his own making. He didn't, of course. No god gave a shit about Iguazu.

But it turned out he gave some shit about Volta, because the moron didn't use the apartment blocks as cover - he veered to the left, to try and use the open ground to try and do a suicidal charge. Iguazu finally remembered the button for his comms.

"VOLTA! FUCKING IDIOT- GET BEHIND THIS BUILDING!" he roared at him, even as he shot down some enterprising MT trying to lob a missile at him from atop of said building. "VOLTA!"

"I'M COMING! God, fucking hell, Iguazu, blow out my eardrums why don't you!"

Volta came trundling back behind the building, though, smoke and debris peppering his figurative heels, until they were both huddled behind an apartment block, every Rubiconian dipshit throwing everything they had at the fucking building and making him feel like he was standing in one of those shitty, old war films where a bunch of stupid idiots were sittingin a trench grim-faced and preparing themselves to charge into no man's land.

Like hell. Iguazu was going the opposite way, to- to man's land. Whatever. AWAY FROM THE EXPLOSIONS AND MISSILES.

"This mission's a fucking mess, Volta," Iguazu said. "Let's just get outta here."

"You mean ditch the mission?"

"No, I mean we'll do a tactical withdrawal to reconsider our options- OF COURSE I MEAN FUCKING DITCH!" Iguazu yelled, and even reached over to bonk Volta's AC over the head with his rifle. "YOU THINK WE'RE GONNA MAKE THAT?! WITH EVERY GODDAMN FUCKING COKED UP REBEL CUNT CARRYING TEN MILLION MISSILES EACH AND WANTING TO RAM EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. UP OUR ASS?!?! WE'D BE FUCKING SCRAP BEFORE WE CLEAR FIFTY METRES YOU DUMB FUCK!"

Volta didn't say anything for a long moment.

"Why'd you follow me, then?" he finally asked, sounding genuinely flummoxed.

Iguazu didn't have an answer for him.

"I'm fucking going, and you're coming with me," Iguazu said instead, refusing to let his insane dive into missile hell be for nothing. "C'mon, we're jumping the trench."

"Ugh..."

For one moment, Iguazu thought Volta was going to say no, and honestly, Iguazu didn't have a plan for that scenario, but fortunately Volta angled his bulky tank body back towards blessed freedom and muttered: "Fine, but I'm blaming you when Michigan asks why we ran away."

"Sure, whatever fine, he was gonna yell at me anyway."

They heroically got the fuck out of there, with the only sign of their toe dipping into hell being chipped paint, a few scratches, and Iguazu deeply confused about his own incomprehensible actions.

#armored core 6 #armored core #g5 iguazu #g4 volta #fanfic #drabble

[softmick]

Truce.

“How long you been here?”

“Long enough to know you’re meeting Iggy at a gallery downtown.”

“Christ.”

“You’re casing it, right?”

“Fuck you is what we’re doing. Scram!”

“I can help! I look like a boy scout next to you.”

“What part of ‘no’ do you not fuckin’ understand? It’s two letters, moron. It’s not the Kash-n-Grab, outta your league.”

“I’m a fast learner.”

“Doubt it.”

“I’ll tell Ian."

“You wouldn’t.”

“I have him on speed dial.”

“You threatenin’ me?”

“Is it working?”

“Put the phone down.”

“I can come?”

“I’m in charge. You listen to me.”

“Sweet.”

-------

Another one for @gardenerian 's prompt "Truce" @galladrabbles

honestly i have so many idea this week, but i feel like three is enough. lol. i've had a lot of fun so far!

#galladrabbles #drabble #fic #gallavich #mickey milkovich #carl gallagher #mine #last one i promise

[the-bjd-community-confess]

k I don’t really care MUCH about cvlur’s past actions in the hobby with her preorder & shit, cuz I wasn't directly affected. it was one of those things where everyone was talking bout it but i didn't order/want a doll so it wasn’t personal to me. It sucked/etc/hope the victims got compensated/etc. That's a disclaimer cuz I'm neither a cvlur fan or hater. This ain’t about her directly. It’s about her fans/haters who like to debate this constantly lately. Which I seem to fuckin be surrounded by. Also, my tone is kinda aggro to some people cuz I curse but i don’t actually lose sleep over this shit lmfao.

what DOES annoy me anytime someone brings this up like that last confession crying about how ppl are so mad she fucked up when she was “young” - girl is ALMOST 30 NOW if I understand correctly. If it happened 10 yrs ago she wouldnt have been in her early 20s, she’d been like 16-19 and THAT would be WAY more understandable to say “she was young and didn’t know any better.” this shit happened LESS than 10 yrs, she was like, college age, which for US is 18-22 TYPICALLY if you go to college fresh outta highschool for a 4 year degree. ppl in their early 20s, while yeah, in the grand scheme of LIFE are young, are still ADULTS, capable of running complex fuckin tasks from working at a company to managing money for a group order. ppl in their early 20s include 20-24. stop infantilizing people. People can make mistakes at ANY age and severely misjudge a situation (intentional or not what she did). cvlur and I are roughly the same iirc, at the time of sending this im 28, turning 29. If she’s younger than me, she was running an order as a highschooler, which she wasn’t.

There were SO fucking many ppl in college in their “early 20s” who, mature or not, worked with large sums of money, complex organizational structures, etc. some ppl are suited for that shit, some ain’t. You can straight up just say “she was under prepared for the situation” instead of ��oh poor bby she was so young 🥺 she just didn’t know!!!” you sound like a fuckin moron, anon. Do you treat every 20yr old who makes a simple mistake at the grocery store like that too? You better tip ur waiters extra who are under 25 even if they spill your drink or make you wait bc they were just too young to know better, they can’t be blamed for that

and for the other person in the comments too, “adults obsessing over her” or whatever …… she’s an adult she’s an adult she’s an adult no wonder why she avoids talking to ppl both haters and fans alike take away her fucking agency SO much. OFF THE SUBJECT OF CVLUR but relating to scammers rn tho, the same can STILL be said about it. Their age doesn’t = not knowing enough about running a good thing. Look at ppl complaining abt dxg1rly, is she worse than everyone younger bc she’s said she’s almost 40, so she only went in with bad intents and not a mistake like cvlur? same with bvmf?

Not sayin dx or bvmf or anyone else who’s been late on shipping/etc etc is absolved of anything, or that they’ve done smth, and same with cvlur, cuz i’ve never ordered from any of these ppl. but don’t give ppl the weak ass get outta jail “oh i was 21 I was just too young to know!”to keep using esp if they really did do something bad. Also, anon, late shipping is absolutely scam territory, and if it happened to you I bet you'd cry scam too by year 2 or whatever lmfaooooo. Thanks for coming to my “I don’t like that the community infantilizes so much shit about this hobby for grown adults” ted talk, I’m off to go scam someone or smth cuz i’m in my 20s so I’m young and don’t know any better lmfao

~Anonymous

#BJD #ABJD #BJD Confessions #Community Confessions #BJD Artists #Preorders #Wait Times

[despair-to-future-arcs]

The Imposter's Descent Into Despair

[Part 1]

Well... I think it's best we start at the beginning...

Date: December 29th, 2011

*As everyone in Class 77-B was surrounding 1 person - their teacher, who was tied up to a chair which Mikan got up*

Pl-Please... let me go...!

O-Okay everyone, it's tied up and we are all set!

Good, seems we got it all set up...

Now Mahiru, is the camera all set - are we ready to record?

Just about...

Yep, all set! Now we are recording and thanks to you and Kazuichi's tech work; we can finally show all the parents of how much of a shitty teacher she is!

Ar-Are you seriously going to do this?! I worked hard on getting your talents to be symbols of hope!

!!! *gets slapped*

One more word out of you and I'm gonna punch you!

Now now everyone, let's calm down and go one at a time; you all are going to get your chance to vent out your anger and frustrations at her but let's keep this in order...

Now then, who wants to go first...?

Gee... going in order eh, I guess we gotta make sure we all don't start yelling at her at once, well... anyone want to go first?

...I will.

Whoa - you got something to say; ham hands? I'm rather surprise you do.

Weeell she did push you to be our teacher and pretend to be here so yeah, I think you got a ton of reasons so I think it make sense.

Thank you, I think if anything I have quite a bit to say to this women...

Now... where to begin with you, witch; maybe how you kept pushing your job onto me and pretending to be you or how you didn't let me work on my own identity at all...

U-Um, w-well... you see, Ultimate Imposter... I was just... I was helping you improve your talent in impersonating and-!

No, if anything you were being nothing but a lazy, incompetent, moron that just her work onto someone that should have to keep this class in line; in fact I had follow everything to the letter and yet it still wasn't good enough for you!

I told you so many damn times, I want to quit impersonating others, to form my own identity and future and yet you never even let me have that! I was stripe away from it because your too lazy to do anything on your own! I even question why you became a teacher if you won't do your job!

Honestly, I am planning to leave this damn place and frankly, the only good thing that came out of this was meeting Daiki but now that he's gone, I can't even get that! So I'm done, I hope you rot in hell you condescending witch which frankly you shouldn't have done this!

But you decided to enroll here, you should of expected this...!

That is the only thing I'll admit was a mistake but at least I know that dropping out is for the best and that I will accept that, but everything else is your fault, I'll just let everyone else say their piece as I rather not let this go on...

...

...

...

...

*As everyone began to say their piece, Nagi walks over as she unties the bandage rope*

WAAAAAAAHAHAAAAAHAAAA, I'M TEEEEEEELLING!!! *runs out of the room*

AND GET OUTTA HERE, YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING BITCH!

YAHOO, AWESOME! Guys we told that bitch off and it was thanks to Nagi!

Wait... your thanking me...? I'm not sure what I did but at least that lady will leave us alone now, thankfully...

Well I mean, you did convince us to fight back and take a stand, still I think you are selling yourself too short Nagi.

... (She doesn't seem too confident but I suppose she isn't use to it.)

'At first this was the start of a revolution, it's what began it all...'

#dr #danganronpa #dtfa #despair to future arc #ds:rw #despair side: re write #sdr2 #super danganronpa 2 #dr:thh #danganronpa: trigger happy havoc #ultimate imposter #nagi nanami #mahiru koizumi #mikan tsumiki #akane owari #ibuki mioda #yukio miyahira #junko enoshima #fuyuhiko kuzuryu #peko pekoyama #teruteru hanamura #gundham tanaka #sonia nevermind #kazuichi souda #nekomaru nidai #ds ep 5