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starkstruck27 · 3 months

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It's been forever since I posted on here, so since I'm trying to get back into the swing of things, have some ftm Billy Hargrove. Also, ignore the timeline here, it isn't exactly accurate, but I don't really care lol. TWs: Very minor nod to domestic/child abuse, a touch of body dysmorphia, and depression

Billy usually wasn't this talkative after hooking up with someone, but this wasn't an ordinary hook-up. It was the 27th time he'd hooked up with Steve Harrington since he'd moved into town almost 6 months ago (not that he was keeping track or anything), but that wasn't what made it different.

It was different because this was the first time he'd ever let Steve see him naked. It was the first time he let him fully take in the body he'd been touching and praising and thrilling for months, and Steve hadn't immediately been repulsed and thrown him out. Billy had been terrified of that, if he showed Steve the scars on his chest and the distinct lack of anything between his legs and he reacted badly, he could end up dead or nearly dead, broken and bloody and devastated.

But none of those things happened, and he knew he shouldn't have worried, anyway. Steve had known for the last 2 months about the way Billy was. He'd finally told him after he pitched a fit when Billy wouldn't let him jerk him off in exchange for a blowjob behind the school. Steve had been raving and ranting so loud, Billy was afraid people would hear, so he shoved him against the wall, put a hand over his mouth and just told him he couldn't. Steve had been confused at first, but when Billy explained it, he could actually see the lightbulb clicking on in Steve's head. He'd reached up and taken Billy's hand from his mouth then, and told him that he understood, but that it didn't change anything. He still thought Billy was hot, he still liked spending time with him, and he still wanted to hook up as long as Billy was on board with it. That'd been another time when things changed during their hook-ups, because that'd been the first time Billy kissed him.

But this time felt even more different than that, because Steve had seen him, truly seen him, for the first time ever, and he didn't care. It didn't change anything, and yet everything had changed. Billy felt completely normal, and completely safe, for the first time in his whole life, and that was everything to him.

He figured that was why now, after they'd cleaned themselves up and gotten settled in Steve's bed, he was so willing to talk about everything.

It was the most he'd talked to anyone since he'd first moved to Hawkins, and as he laid there, resting his head on Steve's chest, he didn't know whether the floaty feeling in his chest was the weight of his burdens being lifted or air sickness from flying on the high of being completely honest with somebody else.

"So, you said you were six when you first noticed something about you was different?" Steve asked, tracing his fingers up and down Billy's side and giving him chills.

"I think so. That was at least when I figured out how to voice it. I think I always kinda knew, I just didn't know how to articulate it, so I never tried. Besides, I was afraid of what my dad would do if he ever found out. It was hell trying to live with that for as long as I did. I didn't hate playing with dolls and stuff, but if ever I was playing house or something with my friends, I always volunteered to be the daddy while everyone else always wanted to be the mommy. And if we were playing princesses or something, I was always the knight or the dragon because I hated being the princess. I always chose the plainest solid-color clothes the girl's section had to offer because I couldn't get the ones I really wanted from the boy's section, so I had to make do. I felt like I had a pit in my stomach and every time I was reminded that the way I looked outside didn't match who I was inside, it would grow a little bit until it felt like that was all that was left of me. I felt like a captive animal, stuck in a cage against my will for people to come and look at for their own amusement. But I couldn't tell any of this to my mom, otherwise my dad would somehow know, so I just kinda kept it to myself. When he eventually did find out, I was really surprised because he didn't even seem to care. I don't know if it was just because he didn't care about me in general or if he saw it as another thing to use against me. I assume his logic was that if he let me change myself, he could get around that whole "a man shouldn't hit a woman" thing, although that never stopped him before, so I don't know," Billy said, keeping his eyes fixed on the wall in front of him. It felt good being able to be so open and honest with somebody else, but there were still things that were hard to talk about for too long. But Steve seemed to understand that, and he never pushed, he just leaned down and kissed Billy's head softly.

"And you were how old when you told them?" Steve asked, pulling the blankets up a bit as he felt Billy shiver again.

"Twelve. It was right after my mom left, and my dad said we were going to move, so since I was going to have to start a new school, I asked if I could register under a different name, and I told him then. I think I had a heart attack when he said yes. Then I spent the weeks leading up to the move the happiest I'd ever been. I gave myself a haircut, which wasn't half bad for my first attempt ever at cutting my own hair, and then I thought about what name I wanted to go with when my dad signed me up for school. That was the hardest part, I think, because I had no idea what to call myself. None of the names I tried out really fit me, and I agonized over it for weeks, but nothing felt right," Billy said, snuggling closer to Steve under the blanket. "Eventually I had to pick something, so I just went with Fred."

"Why Fred?" Steve chuckled lightly, making Billy blush and smile a little sheepishly.

"Because he was my favorite character on Scooby-Doo," he replied, his heart soaring at the sound of Steve's laugh resonating in his chest. He couldn't help but laugh a little himself, his blush burning bright in his cheeks as he did.

"So then how did Billy come about?" Steve asked as he settled down a bit, his hand moving up to play with some of Billy's curls.

"Well, I cycled through a few names throughout the years, trying to find something that felt right. Fred didn't cut it, and neither did any of the other names I'd tried throughout middle and high school. I was going by Jamie right before we moved here, but I was trying to come up with something new before that, and I couldn't think of anything. But then a buddy and I went to see the movie St. Elmo's Fire when it came out, and I got it from that," Billy explained, starting to trace patterns on Steve's chest. "Rob Lowe was in the movie, and I remember when we were trying to figure out what movie to see, my friend stopped next to the poster outside the theater and said, "Oh my God, he looks just like Jamie". So we decided why not give that movie a try, and it was really good, but my friend could not get over how much I looked like Rob Lowe. It was honestly kind of surreal for me, too, because it was like looking in a mirror whenever he was on screen. But it wasn't just that we looked alike, it was also the fact that his character was everything I'd ever wanted to be. He was a smart ass and he was confident and a complete mess and he had style and he cared about his friends more than anything, and he was just so complex. And I remember watching the movie and just wanting to be him, not just look like him. I wanted to be as horrible and as funny and as messy and as complex and as layered and authentic and devil-may-care as he was, more than anything else in the world. So when we moved, I decided to try and become him, starting with the name. I wasn't ever gonna be Billy Hicks, but I figured being Billy Hargrove might be just as good. And the first time I said it to myself in the mirror, it finally felt right. It was the first time any name made me feel like a normal person, like a normal guy. I knew then that Billy was the only name I'd ever go by from then on."

"It was a good choice," Steve said, "It's perfect for you."

"Thanks," Billy said, smiling shyly to himself.

Neither of them said anything for a while after that. Billy had talked himself out, and Steve was perfectly fine with just lying there with him. He cared a lot about Billy, and it made him feel the strongest sense of pride he'd ever felt that Billy trusted him enough to tell him about himself, to let him see behind the walls he constructed, when so very few others got that privilege. He knew a little more about what made Billy tick, and he loved knowing. Or maybe he just loved him.

Billy was beginning to drift off by now, the quiet stillness of the room allowing Steve's steady heartbeat to lull him into drowsiness, but then it began to get faster, and Billy could feel Steve breathing deeply, like he was about to ask something else.

"You don't have to tell me this if you don't want to, but..." he started, his voice barely a whisper. "What was your name before you figured out who you were?"

"Like, the name my parents gave me?" Billy asked, leaning up on his arm as he woke up a bit, "Why?"

Steve shrugged, "Just curious. You don't have to tell me, though. Now that I'm thinking about it, it was kind of an invasive question. Sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

"Hey, don't worry, it's okay," Billy said, using his other hand to turn Steve's face so he was looking at him. "I was just making sure it wasn't for any other reason that you wanted to know. But I trust you, and I like being able tell you things. It's nice being able to talk about my past without being afraid of what might happen," he paused, leaning down to kiss Steve before coming back up and looking into his eyes. "I'll tell you, but you gotta make me a promise that it'll never leave this room, okay?"

"I promise," Steve said, holding out his pinky and making Billy smile as he linked it with his own.

"Okay," he said, taking a deep breath, "It was Kimberly. My mom said she always liked that name, but she always shortened it and called me Kimmy, which I hated. But my middle name was Janice, which is even worse, so I had to live with Kimmy until I was twelve and my dad let me change it."

"Thank God he did. No offense to your mom, but she cannot pick a name to save her life," Steve said, making Billy snort. "Billy suits you much better."

"Thanks, Pretty Boy. That really means a lot to me," Billy said, giving a shy smile before it morphed into a nervous bite of his lip. "Just you in general mean a lot to me. I care about you a lot, and I don't always know how to show it. And I know that I need to work on that, so I'm trying to, but the way I feel about you, it's like I'm a kid again and I don't know how to put it into words. But you're everything, really. You're funny and smart and hot as Hell and the best thing that's ever happened to me in my whole life and I... I just don't even know how to explain it... but I'm trying and..."

"Hey," Steve said softly, leaning up on his arm and looking Billy straight in the eye, "I get it. And I love you, too."

"Y-you do?" Billy asked, and the smile that he gave was so bright and beautiful, Steve almost felt bad for kissing it away.

"Yeah, I do," he mumbled as they parted, "Every trait, every emotion, every complexity. I love every part of you."

Billy usually wasn't as talkative as he had been tonight, but now, it seemed like the well of his words had run dry as he tried to come up with a response to what Steve had just said. Even if he had the words, he wasn't entirely sure he'd be able to string them together coherently enough to convey even half of what he wanted Steve to understand. So he didn't use words.

He sat up reached down to untwist the covers, he fluffed the pillows a little, and then he reached for Steve, gently turning him onto his side before settling down behind him. He pulled Steve to his chest and tangled their legs under the blanket, one of his arms pinned beneath Steve and holding him with a hand over his heart and the other playing with his hair and scratching at his scalp in just the way Billy knew he liked it. He wanted to tell Steve that he loved him with his whole heart, that he trusted him and that he'd never known he was even capable of feeling this strongly about anyone or anything until he'd met him, but the words wouldn't come.

As Steve took the hand that Billy had rested on his chest and intertwined their fingers, though, he knew he got the message.

#billy hargrove #steve harrington #stranger things #harringrove #ftm Billy Hargrove #trans billy hargrove #fanfic

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ticklygiggles · 7 months

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Can I ask Zen (Mystic messenger) x reader, romantic 🧚‍♂️✨ I just love him so much and I miss him 😞

Thank you so much, no pressure! Love your blog <33

[You & I event - entries closed!]

A/N: Thank you very muuuch! I'm happy you enjoy my blog hehe. And omg I miss the mystic boys so much too! I've been wanting to play again, but mystic is so draining omg. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this!

Words: 1k+

You weren't the jealous type. You knew perfectly well that Zen had many fans who loved him unconditionally, whether it was because of his talent or his beauty or both. You loved Zen too, not just for what everyone saw, but also for everything he really was. His fears and insecurities, his joys, dreams and goals, you had the joy of enjoying that and more. It was simply unnecessary to feel jealous when you had a Zen that no one knew.

But you were also human and, famous or not, Zen was your beloved boyfriend, so maybe it was normal to feel a little jealous from time to time, right? Especially when certain ladies had no shame.

It was a little cold that day, but you and Zen decided to have a small picnic on his day off. Zen was excited, it had been a long time since he had the opportunity to enjoy a whole day with you and you were too. You had missed him and you hoped to enjoy that picnic until the last moment.

Everything was going well. Zen had decided that the theme of your picnic would be autumn, your outfits matched, and the coffee was still hot. Many photos had been taken and there was still time before leaving. Everything was perfect, until you noticed a group of girls sitting right next to you two.

At first you didn't care about it, you had a lot of other things to do with your boyfriend, but after a while, you couldn't help but notice the furtive glances they were giving to Zen. Their eyes shone when they saw him and they giggled like silly girls, whispering who knows what to each other.

Maybe because you hadn't spent quality time with Zen in a while, these girls' behavior made you a little angry. And that possessive side that usually didn't come out, vibrated inside you. It was pretty obvious that you and Zen were in a relationship, but if these ladies didn't realize it, then you were more than happy to show them.

"You look so handsome today," you said, loud enough for the girls to hear you. "These colors really suit you."

Zen looked at you with bright eyes, the most adorable blush spreading across his cheeks. "A-Ah, jagiya, you already said that! You just want to make me feel shy, don't you?" He giggled shyly, covering his beautiful smile with one of his hands.

You smiled tenderly, grabbing his hand and chuckling when the ladies gasped.

"I'm just telling the truth, Zenny. You are so handsome, how can I be so lucky to date someone like you?"

Zen laughed, his fair skin getting more pink as he held your hand back. "N-Nohow, why are you acting like this? Do you want my face to explode? Really, you!" He hid his smile with his free hand and you pouted.

"Why do you keep hiding your smile, hmm?" You reached out to squeeze his side, making him squeal as he brought his arm down. "I want to see it!" You said, squeezing him again.

"Ahahaha! J-Jagiyahah! Stohop teheasing me! You know I'm very ticklish!"

Your cheeks flushed. Oh, how could he be so adorable?! He would basically brush it off whenever someone complimented him, but if you did, he would become a blushy, giggly mess like this.

You almost forgot that you were putting on a show for your spectators, you smirked, letting go of Zen's hand to grab his thin waist, making him squeak and giggle brightly as you started tickling him.

"Ah, you certainly are very ticklish, huh? I think it just slipped my mind!"

"N-Nohoho! Hohohonehehey! This ihihis unfahahair!" He giggled, trying to fight your tickly hands, but failing miserably as he fell on his back against the beautiful blanket under you both.

"This is your fault, Zenny. You were hiding your precious smile from me! Now, I deserve to see it." Your hands traveled to his ribs and he kicked his legs with a cackle.

"Not thehehere, nohohot there! You've seheheheen my s-smihihile!" He grabbed your arms, weakly pushing at them. "Nohohot my rihihibs plehehease!"

You giggled at his reaction. You were being gentle, just squeezing and poking here and there, but Zen was simply too ticklish for his own good. Agh, you needed to take a picture of his cute laughing face!

"I have, indeed, but now I want to see it even more! Should I tickle you up here?"

Zen shrieked when one of your hands moved higher, from his ribs towards his armpit. He pressed his arms tightly to his sides, not wanting to give you any space to climb to his weakest spot.

Zen shook his head, laughing nearly hysterically. "Plehehease! Anywhehehere but thehehere! Y-You knohohow I cahan get pretty lohohoud! Plehehease, Jahagiyaha!"

You laughed, moving your hands back down to tickle his ribs. "Stop being so cute! You'll make me want to tickle you even more!"

"I'll dihihihie!"

Despise your words, your fingers actually slowed down until they stopped completely, and as Zen caught his breath, you leaned down and captured his lips in a kiss. He had to pull apart quickly, however, feeling breathless after laughing so much.

"You okay, baby?" You ask softly, brushing his bangs back. "Do you need some water? Let me just- haah! Z-Zen!"

You squeaked in surprise when Zen suddenly grabbed your waist and changed positions, now him hovering you with a wide smirk. You gulped, looking up at him with wide eyes.

"Now, silly baby, don't think I didn't notice you were doing all of that because those girls were looking at us."

You quickly looked over at the girls and were surprised when you found they were gone! You had completely forgotten about them while you were tickling Zen! How disappointing.

You huffed, trying to ignore the heat covering your cheeks as you looked back at him. "They were look at you and, I remind you, you are mine."

His cheeks surely turned red and he stuttered a bit before he spoke again: "O-Of course I'm yours! And that's why you don't have to feel jealous! You're acting silly and for that…"

"N-Nohohahaha! I'm sorry! I'm sohohohorry!"

Zen chucked, "oh, yes you will very sorry right after I'm done with you!"

You deserved it, but it didn't matter, Zen could tickle you until he was satisfied because at the end of the day, he was yours and you were his!

#mystic messenger #mysme #mystic messenger tickling #zen #Hyun Ryu #Zen x Reader #ticklish!Zen #and a biiit of #ticklish!Reader #tickle fic #you & I event #mia's things

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tinyidle · 10 months

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Hey could you please write a fic on the mina sister in law au

I Want You Instead - MM

WARNING: small angst and fluff, suggestive, infidelity (highly not recommended), reader gets cold feet, soon-to-be-sister-in-law mina, fiance reader, female (masc) reader, non idol scenario, fiction ofc

hopefully this is at least part of what you wanted. like for a part two

a year and a month. in three months' time you were going to be with your other half for the rest of your life after knowing him for a year and a month.

you've known him platonically for about a year, have worked with him for ten months, and have dated him for three months. when he proposed to you, you were ecstatic. the love of your life, your light, your sun. you wanted to be with him forever. you loved your fiance. no way in the world would you ever even consider trading your relationship over him. he was your world; until he showed you his sister.

myoui mina.

up until now you have never seen your fiance's side of the family. he's got to see your family countless of times since they live nearby where you two were.

you've known him platonically for about a year, have worked with him for ten months, and have dated her for three months. when he proposed to you, you were ecstatic. the love of your life, your light, your sun. you wanted to be him forever. you loved your fiance. no way in the world would you ever even consider trading your relationship than to be with him. he was your world, until he showed you his sister.

up until now you have never seen your fiance's side of the family. he's got to see your family countless of times since they live nearby where you two were. yet nothing has been said about meeting his family or having you meet them. so when he told you he had invited his parents over for dinner on sunday, you were nervous.

you both luckily could speak japanese, so communicating the problem: meeting his sister was the problem. she just happened to be visiting from a hong kong business meeting, so it wasn't like you didn't know what to expect. but that also meant this was the first time seeing her. you couldn't help but think how she looked compared to him.

sunday came, and the myoui family arrived. you politely bowed to them, and quickly yet mannerly bowed to mina. when your eyes met her face, however, sparks flew. she was beautiful, and the accents on her face made her look even more stunning. she wore a white shirt that matched her hair color, jeans, black high heels, and silver necklace.

mina looked at you, and your heart nearly stopped. your fiance hadn't told you she was this pretty. you knew she was attractive by looking at pictures, but seeing her in person was something else. she had a captivating smile, and you found yourself staring into her eyes. your fiance acted as if this was completely normal, which only made you feel more embarrassed.

"mina, this is my wife to be. wife to be, mina," he nonchalantly introduced you two. you gulped before bowing again, saying hello to her.

she smiled, showing off her perfect teeth. "hello! i am so happy to finally meet you."

you nodded back, not sure how to react. your eyes wandered around the room, noticing how there was nothing special about it. only her. it was only her.

to your misfortune you found out that the myouis were to stay until the wedding night, meaning that three excruciating months were going to be with a family you barely know and a sister in law that looks sinfully cute. what to do? you asked yourself. you're conflicted.

first month.

mina helped you with decorations for the wedding, has showed you origami tricks, and has guided you in deep stretching to relieve any marriage nerves. you two are together almost all day every day, and you soon find that the time goes by faster than you thought. one thing you didn't expect was that mina had a hidden talent. she can sew.

"so you can make my dress?" you tried to elaborate, very excited upon hearing the talent.

mina smiled before nodding. "of course. free of charge, too. anything for my brother's future wife." she started to giggle as she watched you do a happy dance before thanking her.

you two went over the details, and mina went home to working on it right away. she also gave you a few tips on how to keep your fiance happy.

"he'll appreciate it if you cook for him," mina listed out. "and make sure that he takes care of you. you know, like how men like their women not doing hard labor."

you nodded, but in your head you were screaming out 'hell no!'. you never liked anyone bossing you, hence why you engaged to your fiance so quickly despite your parents' constant disapproval. fuck them, you thought, for not wanting what you wanted. but hearing all that this man wanted? fuck that even more.

second month.

you've gotten used to mina's presence, but it seems like she doesn't want to leave. she's always around, and you can't get rid of her. she even comes to work, which you figured was part of the plan. when she does, you try to make conversation, but she's not interested in talking about herself.

"you seem like a strong woman, so tell me about your past relationships," she asked.

legit gave up because i want to upload this before i rip my hair out

#twice smut #mina smut #twice suggestive #twice fluff #mina fluff #mina suggestive

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nxtsnw · 2 years

Text

fluff moments with them

characters: kokonoi, ran, inui

summary: pt. 2 of randoms and comforting moments to spent w these pretty boys!!

I wrote this a while ago, the inuis part is a repost. I'm currently thinking about taking a break, I will let you know. Hope yall will like it ♡

genre: fluff!! comforting

pt. 1 ~ m.masterlist

HAJIME KOKONOI

You weren't late for your date, so Kokonoi had lost his bet. And when his mood soured, you smiled as you finally got your hands on your boyfriend's makeup stuff.

Your prize for winning was the opportunity to finally put on Koko his makeup. Everything was up to you, from the color of the eyeshadow to which lipstick to match from his collection.

The boy was calmed by the delight in your eyes. He had now accepted his fate.

Finally, he noticed that your taste in pairings wasn't all that terrible, so he began tying his hair and wearing a goofy pink headband. You pondered for a long what colors he would look best in for what he was wearing, and in the end, among the various options, you chose a coral red lipstick and a matching eyeshadow of the same color.

Proud of your choices, you went to him to start. . It was amusing to see him sitting on the bed, scrolling through his phone while waiting for you.

He had a confused expression, but he was pleasantly surprised by the colors you chose.

His bright smile filled up his face, and when his eyes met yours, they pleased you as well. You sat on his bed, he leaned back on the backrest, and you leaned forward slightly to get a better view of his face. He had slightly freckles that you hadn't noticed, and he looked so appealing on him.

As your hand brushed over his face, the serious expression on his face lightened, and he began to giggle as a question mark appeared on your face regarding which brush to use.

The atmosphere became less tense as the minutes went by, and the background music added to the enjoyment. So he gradually brought his hands to your hips. There was no malice intended, only closer physical contact. You continued his games and moved your face closer to him, but he did the same.

He wears makeup regularly, so staying motionless came naturally to him. He laughs when he has to correct some steps, and then insists on doing your make-up look. It's a little weird at first because it's your first time, and you're not sure how to position yourself.

You pulled away till a little flush did not cover you and both of your faces. Your bodies were incredibly close together, but nothing made you two feel uncomfortable. The heat from his body managed to warm you as well, and his calm gaze relaxed you.

So the time passed in silence until you completed your work.

Despite a few minor errors, you were pleased with your job. And the cosmetics suited everything about Kokonoi, from his pale skin to his raven black hair. The red gave the young man's face a sense of purity. He was also blushing while looking at you, and the natural blush was the finishing touch to that flawless make-up. All of the shades were beautiful, and the curve of the eyeliner was ideal for his eye shape.

"I don't want to damage this wonderful makeup, and I know I'm fighting the impulse to kiss you right now," he said after looking in the mirror.

His words echoed in your ears, and your heart began to race. Until you approached him and kissed him on the lips. It was only a matter of seconds, and you didn't want to destroy the artwork you had created too.

He lifted your face in his hands and kissed your forehead, taken aback by your action. Since the lipstick mark had been left, he began to giggle and then went to choose which colors would beautify your face that evening.

RAN HAITANI

It wasn't easy being Ran Haitani's lover. You were both busy with your personal life, and he was always busy as a member of a gang. Knowing that he always put you first motivated you to do everything you could to support him as much as possible.

He was always trying to spend as much time as possible with you, and it was only with time that he began to open up to you.

You were precious to him.

He doesn't often state it in words, although there were a few surprises here and there: simply because he couldn't think of any other way to communicate himself because he had never been taught.

Ran leaned back against the door, and slid to the floor, as quietly as possible.

It was 2 am and Ran still hadn't returned. You two had recently purchased an apartment in the center, and you were sitting on the sofa waiting for your boyfriend at the moment. You weren't typically concerned about when he'd come back, but that day he assured you he'd be back sooner than usual. You were about to nod off when you heard keys slipping into the lock and a head peeking out.

He had returned. He looked around, confused, and carried a bouquet in his left hand. His hair was tangled and unkempt, his eyes were half-closed, and he had a few too many scratches on his face. After closing the door, he rested his right hand on his side. Because his lights were turned off, he probably didn't notice you.

"Damn, I am late," he whispered placing his hand on his forehead.

You stayed a few seconds to observe him.

"I look so bad too, shit," he continued before attempting to get up and switch on the light. As he staggered to the switch, he felt a hand on his shoulder; it was you.

He backed away, frightened. And he saw you. In his eyes, you looked beautiful despite your unkempt hair and odd green jammies. He smiled at you, you smiled back, and his eyes lit up.

"You heard me?" he asked you. You nodded. His face darkened a little.

"Don't be concerned. But I don't have the energy to do anything today. Sorry, I will sleep on the sofa so I won't bother you." he then told you to bring the flowers.

"Don't read the message on the bouquet in front of me," he said with a wink. And you didn't hesitate to kiss him on the cheek.

Finally, you decided that you would not have left your partner sleeping on the sofa. That night, no words were required; as if only your minds communicated. You took his hand in yours and pushed him towards the shower after placing the flowers in a vase and the note on the table. He went into it a little hesitantly. After about five minutes, he strolled out wearing only shorts. He chuckled as your face became red.

So you started dressing the wounds, which were fortunately not deep. You were about to go to bed when you realized his long hair was fully soaked, and he immediately began to sneeze. You unwillingly stood up to get the hairdryer. He pretended nothing had happened, even though his exhaustion was worse. But you persisted and sat him up to dry his hair. He suddenly awoke when he heard the hairdryer noise.

Ran had never let anyone touch his hair. But it was you, his partner, that he loves so much. He positioned himself well so that you could be as comfortable as possible. And he was staring into space, but the thought of him was fixed on you, sighing a little, drying his hair at 3 am.

That hair was velvety, soft, and mint-scented. As soon as you finished, you noticed that he had fallen asleep. You couldn't explain how you hadn't noticed: he had been sitting and silent the entire time. You sat near him and let him lie down on the bed, pushing him slightly.

You could feel the arms that would embrace you, as well as the aroma of mint that had returned. Ran Haitani was hugging you.

"Thank you. I love you," he said softly before falling asleep.

When he whispered those two words to you for the first time, a rush of delight washed over you, lulling you into that unforgettable night.

INUI SEISHU

"These flowers remind me to think of you! because your hair is a combination of white and yellow, and their aroma even if is hardly detectable it is still my favorite!" the young girl y/n said these remarks to her best friend, Inui Seishu.

"I don't like those. I like red roses since they remind me of your constantly reddish cheeks," and even so, your face was turning crimson.

The only thing you could remember was that after it both of you started naturally laughing while a field of chamomille flowers was surrounding both of you - Oh, and his laugh was so pleasant.

The next day you had to move to another city with your family, thinking that you would never meet again that boy.

But you were wrong.

It was passed five years, and you were back again there.

Walking along the old streets brings to your mind a lot of memories, and when you were passing by a field of chamomile flowers you remembered him.

This boy with an angelic face, whose face you were in love with. You started to smile about how stupid that sentence you said could have sounded funny. But these were your feeling, and still, there was something special in these flowers. You kept strolling down that street, wondering how he could have changed in so many years.

Who knows if you would still have the courage to tell him these words you said to him that time. The only thing you were sure about was that now you could have the opportunity to define him in even more sophisticated words, as your vocabulary had vastly expanded over the past years.

You still have the memory of his face vivid in your memory.

You just happened to sit right where you had that conversation with Inui five years ago. Looking at the chamomile flower field you started to bring that sweet memory to mind.

It wasn't only their material beauty; there was something more endearing about the flowers that reminded you of him at the time. Their aroma was noticeable, and their hue also gave out apeaceful and comforting vibe.

Watching them was like a break from the world, a moment of meditation with only their pure beauty stuff your mind.

You might also mention how gentle he was to you, always putting you first. Always leaving you your favorite food from school, helping you to tidy your school bag, and even bringing you home when your parents couldn't.

These little details were unsaid clearly by your words at the time. The fact that he associated you with red roses for your checks made you smile and flush like an idiot.

You were still watching at these flowers, thinking about him when someone sits next to you.

"Uhm sorry if I bother you, but you remind me of the roses girl. By any chance, are you y/n l/n?" the strangers asked you.

With your heart starting beating faster you turn around to the one who pronounced that sentence.

"Inui??"

"Oh, thank God. hey, it's been a while y/n" he said. He was so different from that time, a scar around his eyes caught your attention for a second, but then you started to watch his pretty eyes and his hair that was not changed so much after all. His angelic face was still present, he kept his comforting expression still there.

"I'm sorry if I didn't say anything that time, but I didn't know how-" and you lost track of what he had just spoken to you.

"Yes, indeed! You won't believe me when I tell you that I was thinking about you right now," and he simply grinned, saying:

"You are now even more pretty than the last time I saw you."

"You've always been so beautiful, and Inui, you still remind me of these flowers, although I could tell you a lot of other reasons why," you replied pointing to the field of flowers in front of you.

"And I still think about you when I see red roses. Even now your cheeks are red, but this time your lips are too. Your scent is charming as it has always been" he added with nonchalance.

It was a magical evening, just you two talking about roses and chaamomille flowers.

tagging list: @frosttea @mrssunasimpowo @elychee @sonder-paradise

(click here If you'd like to join my taglist♡)

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olive-gardens-breadstick · 1 year

Text

part 2 of my hope!hob Pandora's box au

part 1 part 3

word count: 2079

Morpheus picks the candle up and rolls it in his hand, examining it. it's not really anything special, just a yellow prayer candle. The glass is completely blank showing off the candle completely. He runs his fingers over the smooth glass considering putting something on it, like a sticker or something. Does he even have any stickers? Does hope even like stickers? Does he know what stickers are? He shakes the thoughts from his head and instead thinks about what story to tell. He'd thought about it a lot over the past few days. He's lived so long. How could he possibly choose where to start? Would hope have some sort of request?

he eventually decides to just light it, maybe his audience will inspire him and everything will work itself out once hope is here. Morpheus grabs a match and lights the candle and for a moment, everything is still. Morpheus looks around not seeing anything change and wonders if he did what he was supposed to. Maybe he was supposed to light it on an altar? Moving to a small table in his living room, he notices all the lights in his house are getting noticeably brighter until he has to set the candle down on the little table and cover his eyes from the blinding light. He keeps his face covered until he can tell the light has died down. When he uncovers his eyes he sees hope looking at him with a confused look.

"why were you covering your face?" he asks as Morpheus blinks away the floaters from hopes entrance

"your entrance was very bright" he says rubbing his eyes "if i hadn't it would have caused some serious damage to my eyes"

"oh I'm so sorry" hope apologizes stepping back and pulling his hands seemingly into his chest "I didn't know I'll try not to do it next time" he says looking down.

"It's alright, I doubt you can help it" Morpheus says turning back to the little table kneeling "next time I'll just close my eyes and face the wall after I light the candle." he assures hope as he clears the table of its previous inhabitants.

"What are you doing?" Hope asks, peering over his shoulder.

"I'm making a specific space for your candle." He explains picking up the candle to wipe down the table. He doesn't notice the endless' start to glow behind him.

"like.. an, alter?" hope inquires expectantly. no one had ever made HIM an alter before, it was always for some lesser being, made to syphon from him through a god or deity, he could feel it while he was in the box. he felt the faint pull in his chest, the construction and destruction of temples and altars made for others in an attempt to reach him through them. to have an altar made with specifically him in mind, well, it was... flattering.

"Yeah, an altar. seems like the most efficient way to do this, to get you caught up when I'm busy. I can just leave you things and you can examine them to learn about the current state of the world." he explains, dusting off his hands and standing up "does seem a little bland right now though huh? I don't think my darker colors really match your candle though, gonna have to go out and get some white and gold stuff." he adds examining the bare 'alter' with nothing but a candle, 'hardly counts as an alter right now though'

Morpheus turns to face hope, noticing he's still wearing a tunic. "how about instead of a story we can go get you a new wardrobe and some stuff for your altar?" he suggests looking hope up and down "you'll have to change though, i think my clothes will fit you"

"i- i mean- yeah, sure, sounds fun." Hob can feel himself falling through the words, first the mortal makes him an altar then offers to not only buy him clothes but choose things for his altar? He stands there lost in thought for a moment until the aforementioned mortal speaks to him once more.

"Also, will you stay here if I snuff the candle? I don't want to waste it." he asks handing him a set of completely black clothes 'he doesn't want to waste it' hob thinks with a smile. "yes I will, is there a room I can change in?" after Morpheus helps him to the bathroom and leaves hope to change, he snuffs the candle and makes a small list of the things he knows he has to get:

gold tablecloth

white lace runner

small offering tray

one (1) nice outfit for hope

they'd have to go somewhere nearby, hope doesn't seem like he'd be too keen on travelling by anything other than foot. Luckily there's a small boutique and second hand store nearby where they should be able to get everything. hob walks out with the clothes slightly askew and holding a pair of shoes.

"I do not know how to put these on," he says, raising them slightly higher. Morpheus looks up from his list surveying hope in his clothes.

"I probably should've helped you, apologies" he says adjusting the clothes slightly "but you managed to get the socks on so overall I'd say this is a success" he declares, motioning for hope to sit down on the couch. as soon as he does Morpheus kneels to help hope with the shoes

"Will the clothes we get me today look like this?" Hope asks as he watches Morpheus tie the left shoe.

"no, were going to get you something nicer, these clothes are just easy to take off and put on" he explains tying the right shoe "makes the whole process of clothes shopping easier" he sighs looking up "ready to go?" he asks standing up, hope nods. "alright let's go then."

the shops truly aren't that far. a ten minute walk at best. They don't talk much as Morpheus is too lost in thought and hope is too enamoured by the advancements of civilization, so enamoured in fact that he almost gets hit by a car. If Morpheus hadn't pulled him back onto the sidewalk at the last second he would've been very uncomfortable. He takes a minute to process what's going on and notices he is very close to Morpheus, almost burrowed into his chest with his arms wrapped around him. and Morpheus is so very comfortable and warm with the long coat he has on an-

"Okay" the word cuts through Hob's thoughts like a xiphos as Morpheus backs up to look him in the eyes and holds out his hand "take my hand."

"why?" If hob were human he'd say he could feel the blood rushing to his face as his eyes widened. but he's not human so he could soundly tell you that he was glowing slightly.

"So you don't go, somehow unknowingly, stepping into oncoming traffic." he explains as he holds his hand up a little higher, hob takes it and they continue on their way.

Morpheus wouldn't say he was out of his depth when it came to clothes shopping, he just didn't buy color very offten. All of his clothes were various shades of black and dark grey with a few lighter greys (to which his students never failed to make a comment along the lines of 'busting out the spring collection I see' ) but looking at hope in his clothes... well he just didn't look right in black. but trying to figure out what base color to start with was tricky. black was out of the picture but yellow seemed too strong to use as a base. Eventually he settled on a white button up to layer with some sort of sweater. Maybe that's where the yellow could come in? He could worry about that in a moment, he should deal with the rest of the outfit first then the rest of the layers. He looked over all his options, made some choices and measured them against hope to get the right size and sent him to try them on and went looking for some layers. Maybe a blue sweater? but then the colors would-

"professor galanis?" uh oh "what are you doing here? its for sure not your style.'' This much was very true, though he hadn't expected to run into any of his students so he absolutely did not come up with a cover story.

"well, i-"

"hey, could you help me with this?'' The students' eyes go wide and Morpheus can't tell if the interruption is a blessing or curse but goes to help nonetheless. After defeating the buttons he hands hope a couple sweaters to try on and turns around to see his student still standing there.

"sorry about that I-"

"don't even worry about it sir." she says with a smile "sorry for interrupting your … outing." he’s going to get so many questions on Monday "i'll just-"

"actually, could you help me?" he will never hear the end of them "I'm not much of a color person and I need to pick out some accessories"

her eyes light up and she smiles wider "of course sir, i wasn't planning on buying anything anyways"

They spend far more time in the store than Morpheus had planned and by the end of the trip Hope has several outfits with accessories to match. The outfit he's wearing to replace Morpheus's clothes consists of a pair of cuffed blue jeans, a pale yellow sweater over a white button up, a string of fake pearls and a pair of converse.

"Thank you Ms. Tarcey," he says as they start heading out.

"no problem Mr. g, I came out to window shop and this was way more fun!" she says, opening the door.

"I'm sure it was," he says with a laugh "to show my gratitude, I'm willing to give you full marks on the writing assignment I know you haven't started." he offers as they get to the street watching as her eyes go wide and mouth falls open. "Now this is a one time thing. I will not offer this if you help me again." he warns, grabbing Hope's hand before he can run down the sidewalk to follow a dog.

"sir you have no idea how much that helps me" she mumbles, face still in total shock.

"I actually do," he quips. "have a good evening Ms. Tarcey. I'll see you Monday" he says leading hope to the secondhand store across the street.

"who was that?" hob asks once they're in the store.

"one of my students." Morpheus says inspecting a tablecloth. "I teach creative writing" he clarifies, putting the tablecloth back and picking up another. "What do you think of this one?" he asks, handing the fabric to hope.

The cloth is a rich yellow with a light shine, when the light hits it, shifting it reveals a pattern akin to Victorian woodwork, hob doesn't know that of course but he thinks it's beautiful anyways. He looks over to Morpheus who is carefully inspecting other tablecloths and table runners. hob notes how sharp his facial features are, how … elegant … they look. Morpheus turns back to him and he shakes the notion from his head.

"so..?"

"huh? oh, OH, yes i like it, it's perfect" hob chastises himself over how the words come out and picks up a thin lace table runner and pretends to examine it to keep his eyes from wandering. "this one's nice isn't it?"

"mm" he agrees silently, taking it from hob’s hand and putting it in the small basket on his arm and walking towards a different part of the store. As he's following a small dish catches hob’s eye, well it's not really a dish, it's a scallop shell with a castle on a hill painted in blue on the inside and the edges are painted gold. He carefully turns it over in his hand examining it closely.

"Do you like it?"

Hob turns and sees Morpheus is behind him looking over his shoulder "oh yes, isn't it cool?" he beams, staring into morpheus's very.. pretty.. pale blue.. eyes.

"It is very pretty," he says, taking it from Hope's hand, examining it himself for a moment before gently putting it in the basket. "lets go check out." he says with a small smile and hob glows a tad.

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sasslett · 1 year

Text

A Wee Bit of Shopping

"Just… what exactly are we doing here?"

Jess eyed the Au Ra woman beside her warily as Kali confidently responded, "Shopping."

"Shopping? For what?" While Thavnair certainly had its fair share of shops and stalls lining the colorful, tile-paved streets, there wasn't anything she could think of that she needed there. Both her and Varrus' weapons and armor were in perfectly fine repair, and between her beloved necklace, her Eternity Ring and her ruby earrings, she had all the jewelry she could ever want.

Yet Kali chose not to respond, instead coming to a stop before one particular stall, draped from top to bottom with fine fabrics and silks.

"Greetings, Lady Kal'istae," the merchant greeted, a wide smile upon his face - someone she knew, evidently.

"And good day to you, Rastare," she replied, her tail flicking as her lavender-rimmed eyes perused the merchant's wares. And while his fancy fabrics and ornate beadery were indeed gorgeous, Jess couldn't imagine what they were there for.

"Is there something you need?" Jess asked, eyeing the woman's already-ornate outfit, from the modest halter-top to the blue silk sash hanging down to her skirts below - the perfect gear for a dancer of her skill.

"On the contrary, it's something you need." The Au Ra grinned.

"Me?!"

She nodded. "You, my dear, are in dire need of a few… wardrobe updates."

"What do you mean?" Jess glanced down to her leather and scale armor, quite beautiful, if she did say so herself.

Yet Kali chose to ignore her, instead flicking through the merchant's racks until she found, presumably, what she was looking for, producing a dark red, silken bustier with a matching short skirt, wisps of chiffon draping from the bottoms to the floor, both adorned with gold-beaded chains.

"Here."

She may as well have been handing the Highlander a viper, for the way she recoiled with widened eyes.

"What? Me? In this?"

The Au Ra nodded.

"How can you even wear something like this?" She gently plucked the thin fabric between her fingers. "There's not even an ilm of protection!"

"Jess," Kali's eyes regarded her with a bemused grin, "not everything you wear has to be armored."

"I don't follow."

"And look, it's even your color!"

"My color?"

Kali nodded, snorting as she evidently caught the Highlander's confusion. "You cannot mean to tell me that you haven't noticed everything you wear is the same hue. Including your wedding dress."

"Says you," Jess snorted, "the one who only ever wears blue."

"It's purple."

"I really think it's-"

With a disgruntled sigh, the smaller woman cut her off, giving her friend a gentle-but-firm shove towards the rear of the stall. "Just try it on, will you? For me?"

Though she had more than half a mind to argue, she also knew her friend could be quite a force to be reckoned with, despite her tiny size. And so, with a sigh, she acquiesced, shuffling to the makeshift changing stall in the back, painstakingly peeling off every last layer of armor until she stood uncomfortably exposed, only a thin curtain hiding her form from the rest of the bustling marketplace.

Yet… she was doing it for a friend. With that resolve in mind, she gently pulled on the thin, delicate fabric, the outfit fitting her surprisingly well… Aside from the fact that she felt, and looked, she was certain, entirely out of place in the scanty clothing. It clearly hadn't been made with her in mind, the ornate jewelry clashing hard against her toned, muscular form, the large scar across her abdomen visible for all to see.

Not that any of that seemed to phase Kali, the Au Ra's lavender eyes glowing in delight as Jess pulled back the curtain.

"It's gorgeous!" she gasped, bringing her hands up over her heart.

"It may be, but I am not," Jess huffed. "Are you satisfied? Can I take it off now?"

"No!" the blue-haired woman hissed, her tone equal parts insistent and threatening. "You are gorgeous, and you are going to wear it."

Before she could protest further, the dancer turned back to the merchant, handing him a small bag of gil.

"There. It's done. Now you can't very well refuse, can you?"

Jess merely gave a groan. "Alright. Fine. I'll keep it. Just let me go and change-"

"Absolutely not." Quick as a whip, Kali reached out and grasped the woman's wrist, preventing her from slinking back inside the changing room. "You are not taking that off, at least, not until a certain someone has had all the time they'd like to… appreciate it."

Jess raised an eyebrow, doing her best to suppress the blush she felt rising up her cheeks.

"Kali! Was this your plan all along?!"

Judging by the twinkle in the Au Ra's lavender eyes… she had her answer.

#my writing #my wols #also kali #ainyan #this was all her idea I just ran with it

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autevi · 1 year

Text

time for another comfort re-read of the Imperial Radch books

starting with Ancillary Justice!

(also because after reading the Translation State ARC I have THINGS I must revisit and THINK about)

the more I read (rather, listen to, because I have the audiobooks until I can obtain a pretty box set of the series) Ann Leckie's books, the more I delight in how she writes abrasive characters who are also liked and loved.

You don’t have to be good and pleasant to be loved You don't have to fawn to be loved You can be stubborn and sulky and selfish and bitter and unhappy and still be loved You can be messed up and still be loved You can be someone that is barely considered a person and still be loved

also god. every time i get to the part where Awn goes to Var deck my heart clenches. that anaander has such "mad king" vibes, she straddles the line between unhinged and probably very close to correct so intensely!!!

i keep thinking about gender inside and outside the radch and this description breq gives of the crowds of people she sees on omaugh station, chefs kiss!!

"An eddying crowd of unnervingly, ambiguously gendered people. I saw all the features that would mark gender for non-radchaai. never, to my annoyance and inconvenience, the same way in each place. short hair or long, worn unbound, trailing down a back, or thick curled nimbus, or bound, braided, pinned, tied. thick bodied, or thin. faces delicate featured or coarse, with cosmetics or none. a profusion of colors that would have been gender-marked in other places. all of this matched randomly with bodies curving at breast and hip, or not. bodies that one moment moved in ways various non-radchaai would call feminine, the next moment, masculine."

also the slow reveal of how seivarden actually cares about breq beyond just ensuring the provider of seivarden’s basic needs won’t suddenly drop her.... like she comes back from her appointment having been set up with clothes, food, and lodging, and immediately notices that breq looks uncomfortable in her meeting with skaaiat and bitches breq out for neglecting her own needs and insisting she’ll be fine [on her own now that she’s registered with the station], she'll see breq tomorrow (willingly! Not out of need anymore!) and breq should rest her injured leg!!!! seivarden.... best worst girl!!! "you don't have to take care of me now, see, please look after yourself!!" (and soon we'll start seeing seivarden more and more forcefully trying to take care of breq!!!)

breq on watching musicals for entertainment: "It was mindless, but the songs were nice and improved my mood considerably" SAME, BREQ, SAME

seivarden, "everything that happens on my watch is my fault", echoing awn unknowingly, and breq does not make even the tiniest internal monologue PEEP while getting visibly more and more uncomfortable!!!

and then seivarden goes off on/about the snooty conservatives!! The Radicalization of Seivarden Vendaai!!!! we're watching her go slowly from "I am important because of my bloodline" to "I am important not because of the circumstances of my birth but because this person has made it eminently clear that my bloodline is irrelevant and I matter to them anyway"

god i would love a seivarden POV from Justice. what she thinks is going on with Breq and what she notices and realizes before things are made clear!!

AND i am once again pining for Anaander backstory. Breq muses "the Radch had used ancillaries long before Anaander Mianaai had made herself into what she was, there just hadn't been quite so many of them." i wanna know what ancillaries in pre-anaander radch were like and i wanna watch anaander's transformation from individual to lord of the radch!!!

"Ancillaries were notorious for their expressionless faces. I could easily keep from smiling." Sure, Breq.

Seivarden standing up to Omaugh Anaander because she's more loyal to Breq than the Lord of the Radch….. god. I love Seivarden

#imperial radch

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junobutbored · 1 year

Text

Frosty Blue

Satoru Gojo imagine

Two children from different backgrounds end up being forever connected as a result of an unexpected encounter in the forest.

Author's note: This is just a little scenario of mine, will maybe turn it into a series but we'll see. Enjoy!

Winter had always been her preferred season, for with the dark times followed a quietness that would match no other. The dense layer of newly fallen snow suppressed all background noise of reality, even those disturbing the mind. Calmness settled over the young girl as she stood in the deep forest, admiring the thick snowflakes that tingle down from above. Nothing could disturb her in this state. Not even the freezing breeze that penetrated her mono colored yukata nor the overwhelmingly dark forest that were only illuminated by great the crescent moon settled in the big black ink.

The girls' eyes closely traced the falling snow until it finally rested onto the ground. From there the cycle continued endlessly until her eyes finally rested upon another pair. The light from the moon shone upon him as he too stared onto the girl. The young boys' expression was dull and not even the chilled breeze seemed to break his eye contact. The girl cowered backwards when her trance was broken and reality brought her back. Had I not heard the sound of snow crunching under his step? When she brought her gaze upon the boy again, his expression had changed. His bright eyes were now slightly dilated and his lips were caught in an "o". She also noticed how his hand was stretched towards her, as if he'd been afraid she'd leave. When the boy noticed her observation, he quickly retracted his arm and kept it tight against his small form. The boy cleared his throat and took the first step in starting the conversation.

"What are you doing out here in the middle of the night?" he gently asked the young girl as if he was addressing a frightened animal. The girl clenched her fists in the thin fabric of her clothing and kept her eyes on her slippers beneath her.

"Nothing, just admiring the snow." She paused lightly before quickly bowing before him. "I'm sorry if I disturbed you, please don't be mad at me." The girl stood almost completely still in her bowing motion and her eyes were shut tightly as she awaited his response. The boy on the other hand was simply shocked from her reaction. His immediate thought was to walk towards her to raise the girl from her position, however as soon as he began to march up to her she at once hunched away on a defensive matter. He quickly stopped. For the first time in a while, the boy didn't have any idea what to do. There was always something swiftly coming to his mind, but in a situation like this, standing alone with a frightened girl in the deep forest late at night, his head was empty. So he just stood still. Her whole body was shaking slightly but he didn't know if it was because of the cold or out of fear. After a while, the girl slowly craned her head upwards and looked at him almost confused. Her arms unwrapped slightly from around her body and the boy carefully took a step back.

"Don't worry, I'm not mad at you. In fact, it was you who was being disturbed so I should be the one apologizing." The boy paused slightly before stretching his hand towards her again. Her shutter passed unnoticed. "My name is Satoru, what's yours?"

The girl glanced at Satoru's hand suspiciously before slowly greeting his handshake with her own palm. As soon as their hands made contact, Satoru was the one to tremble.

"Gee you're so cold, no wonder why your lips are turned all blue." He laughed slightly to himself as he pulled a hand through his snow white hair. The girl looked confused and gently touched her own lips with the tip off her fingers. That was another thing she hadn't known before. The pair of frosty blue eyes met with her own again and Satoru grasped her hand from her face.

"Come with me! I'm sure the servants can find you something warmer to wear at home and perhaps even some hot tea." The boy smiled widely and as soon as the girl made the slightest motion of a nod, Satoru began to drag her through the forest. She gasped slightly as she almost lost footing but quickly regathered her balance.

There they were, two young children who are complete strangers to each other, one leading the other into the safety of his home. The great trees of the deep forest flashed past them as they ran through the snow-tucked landscape. She saw the silver tufts of his head, decorated with a crown of even brighter white snowflakes. As the two finally reached the streets of civilization, the air was filled with both of their gasps for air. Both she and Satoru had stopped briefly to regain their energy from running constantly. Their eyes once again locked and the two children broke out in giggles. Satoru still held her hand tightly as he gestured to her to continue their walk. However the joyful atmosphere didn't hold for long.

"Where have you been, girl?" The older man's voice boomed over the streets and Satoru felt her grip on him tighten as the elder now'd started to march towards the two. "Do you know what time it is?!"

The girl's eyes met with Satoru's brilliant blue ones and he could tell just by her look that the man's presence wasn't precisely cherished. She looked back onto the man that now reached the two and he shot out his arm to grasp her free arm. Satoru didn't have any time to react.

"Hey you answer me you dreadful fry" The man roared at her as he pulled her close to his face.

"I-I'm sorry sir, I didn't know it was this late."

Satoru stood before the two in confusion. Who was this man even? As he stood there watching them anxiously, the older man caught his eye and his expression quickly fell. The man threw himself onto the dirty street, dragging Satoru's new friend with him harshly. She yelped as her knees hit the cold stone.

"I apologize for this mishap, my lord. This filth won't bother you again." The man grasped her head and puched it down until it too was planted onto the ground. This time the girl didn't make any resistance. "Please accept our forgiveness and let us be on our way, Gojo sir."

Gojo. She had heard that name before. It was one of the great jujutsu families. Father had told her before that one of their houses resided close to her village but never had she seen them before. However rumors of the white haired boy with special techniques had spread around the civilians when the clan had built the great temple-like fortress by the other side of the dense forest. Her father jerked her from the ground and pulled her away from where Satoru stood. Before disappearing behind a building, the girl locked eyes with the opposite frosty blue ones. No goodbye's or farewell's were exchanged through words, but behind both of their eyes resided the same thought.

There Satoru stood alone, in the late evening, longing for a girl he'd just met. A girl he never got the name of. A girl who he'd never forget.

A girl he'd meet again in the future.

We'll meet again..don't know where, don't know when..

But I know we'll meet again some sunny day....

#saturo gojo x reader #gojo fanfic #gojo satoru #gojo x reader #saturo x reader #satoru gojo #jujutsu kaisen imagine #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen #jjk satoru

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loorain · 6 months

Text

Sims 4 Fontenot Legacy - A Nice Surprise

The day before Sigrid and Robin's wedding, all is peaceful as Sigrid gets an opportunity to sleep in just a little. That is, until there's a knock on the door.

Sigrid: Who could that be?

Sigrid: Anya! What are you doing here?

Anya: Well hello to you too!

Sigrid chuckles, pulling her into a hug.

Sigrid: Well, hi. Can't blame me for being shocked to see you, especially this early in the morning.

Anya: I have a good reason for it.

Sigrid: Which is...?

Anya: Well, as it's one day before your big day, I'm going to take you out to celebrate!

Sigrid: Celebrate? I mean, isn't a wedding celebration enough?

Anya: Weddings celebrate the couple and the joining of family. This celebration is for you.

Sigrid: Me? Gee Anya, I don't know about-

Anya: Now before you turn me down, I want you to take this.

Anya pulls out a gift, handing it to Sigrid.

Sigrid: Wha- Anya, what is this?

Anya: A new dress, paired with a couple more special accessories. Now I want you to get dressed, do your makeup, make yourself look absolutely stunning, and then come with me. Robin's already in on the surprise and will take care of the girls, so don't worry about them. Today is all about you.

Sigrid: I... wow... thank you. I'm not used to all of this. Guess I can't back out now.

Anya: That's right! Come on, it'll be fun, just trust me, kay?

Sigrid: Okay, I trust you.

Anya: Well hurry inside and get ready!

Sigrid gets ready and is whisked away by Anya to an undisclosed location. When she arrives, Sigrid witnesses an entire space fully decorated, gifts piled up, and a delicious spread of food. She's amazed to see all of this, to say the least.

Sigrid: Oh my- what is all of this?

Before Sigrid can get an answer to that, sims begin piling into the space, family from all sides here to celebrate. Sigrid can only take in all the festivities for a moment, in awe to see such a collection of family here, both old and new faces.

In all the excitement, Sigrid hadn't even noticed that Sabrina and Scarlett had also arrived, both wearing matching colors to her sash. She first spots Sabrina, who's chatting with Anya as if all of this is just a casual thing.

Sigrid: Okay, don't act like this is normal! Did you guys plan all of this?

Sabrina chuckles, turning to look at Sigrid.

Sabrina: Well Anya was the mastermind behind all of this, but we all pitched in.

Anya: I know you didn't really want all of the raucousness of a bachelorette party, but you've been through a lot to get to this moment, so I figured what better way to celebrate you than bring all the ladies in the family together to celebrate sisterhood with a bridal shower. Well, ladies plus Sabrina.

Sabrina side-eyes Anya playfully, acknowledging the validating comment while also seeing it for the good-natured jest it is.

Sabrina: Har-har, I can be a lady when needed.

Anya: And thank goodness for that, because we need you right now!

Sigrid laughs at the two cousins' banter, her heart swelling.

Sigrid: You guys are amazing. This is amazing.

Sabrina: Well enjoy it because you deserve it! Now go say hi to all your guests!

Anya: Yeah, go have fun girly!

Sigrid nods and happily heads off to greet her guests, some of whom she is meeting for the first time as they officially welcome her into the family. It's a tad overwhelming, but equally wonderful to be surrounded by so much love. Thankfully, there are familiar faces that help make things easier.

Matilda: Well well! So my big blockhead brother still managed to convince you to marry him.

Sigrid laughs.

Sigrid: Great to see you, Matilda. Love the new look!

Matilda: Well I had to upgrade my wardrobe. Just wait until you see my outfit for tomorrow. I'll try not to upstage you, but no promises.

Sigrid: I wouldn't expect anything less! How's your mom and brothers?

Matilda: Ugh, don't get me started. Let's just say I'm glad my teen years are almost over. I'm ready for my own space. No snotty boys allowed.

Sigrid: I understand, but try to cherish the moments as well. They'll be the distant past before you know it.

Matilda: Yeah, I know. Just glad to have some feminine energy join the family. It's nice to have a sister.

Sigrid: Well we have a lifetime to spend hanging out together if you'd like. Hanging around you might help keep me young!

Matilda: Trust me, dealing with my nieces and brother, you're going to need it. We'll take care of each other.

Sigrid: Thanks, sis.

Speaking of sisters, Sigrid spots and greets Yolanda with a big hug.

Sigrid: Yolanda! You made it!

Yolanda: Wouldn't miss it for the world! The girls are around here somewhere too. Figured it'd be nice for them to get out of the house and meet some other ladies. You look wonderful, by the way.

Sigrid: Thanks, all Anya's doing. I'll have to find the girls after this. Miss the boys too. How are they doing?

Yolanda's face sours at just the thought.

Yolanda: Ugh, it's just getting harder. Sergio communicates less and less and won't let Kirk see his brother much these days. He's starting to spiral mentally and it's so frustrating because it feels like I'm failing him, but what can I do when his father is being such a pain? Caring for three kids is hard enough, but trying to co-parent with Virginia's ex? He's insufferable at times.

Sigrid: Hmm, you know, Sergio is Anya's ex as well. Maybe she can help you. If nothing else, she can give you some context and additional information to help deal with him. Maybe with time, things will improve.

Yolanda: I hope so. I'll have to talk to her... oh, what am I doing? This is your day! Don't let me bring the mood down, go and enjoy your last day as an unmarried woman! We're all excited for the big day tomorrow!

Sigrid and Yolanda aren't the only ones who end up having a deep conversation that day, however.

Scarlett: Anya went all out on this place, didn't she? What a lovely idea for Sigrid.

Sabrina: Yeah, I think Sigrid likes this a lot, even if she wasn't expecting it or even thought she really wanted it. And I mean, it's always nice to have something to celebrate. An impending wedding is the perfect excuse.

Scarlett: Speaking of weddings... how are you and Beau doing?

Sabrina can't help but laugh at their mother's attempt at being subtle.

Sabrina: Mom, you can just just say it. You wanna know if Beau and I are getting to that point in our relationship or not.

Scarlett: Well...?

Sabrina: Well... At Laks and Tabatha's wedding, Tabatha said she saw me and Beau getting married next in our friend group. I can see why. Beau is a great partner. He's attentive, understanding, and communicative. Juno loves him, too. I know he's more than willing to officially be Juno's stepdad.

Scarlett: I'm hearing a lot about other's perception of him, and very little about yours. How are you feeling in this relationship?

Sabrina: I love Beau. I was just saying all this to give perspective to my thought process at that moment when Tabatha brought it up. It got me thinking... maybe she's right. Maybe we should just do it.

Scarlett: I wished you'd say it a little more romantic-like rather than say you should "just do it".

Sabrina: Mom, I didn't mean-

Scarlett: Marriage is a big deal. It's not for everyone. It wasn't for me. That doesn't mean it's not for you, but you need to be absolutely sure. You want my opinion? I think Beau's the best guy you've ever been involved with. He's stuck with you through a lot of crap. I know for a fact he loves you with his entire heart. The only thing stopping him from getting on one knee this very moment is you. He respects that you need to take things slow. He's never going to force you into anything you don't want to do, and that includes marrying him. He already sees Juno as his, even with Marquise involved. But, my opinion doesn't really matter, so I'll ask this one more time: how are you feeling in this relationship?

Sabrina takes in Scarlett's words, their demeanor softening as they think about their boyfriend and all he's been to them. A small smile forms on their face.

Sabrina: I... wanna propose to Beau. He's been going on my timeline for so long, it feels right to display my love for him. And you know me, I've never been traditional. I'm sure Beau would propose if I let him know that's the next step I want, but I think it's better the other way around in this context.

Scarlett grins at her child, hearing sure words come out of their mouth for the first time in this conversation. Sabrina suddenly feels nervous and shy, realizing the earnest expression on their mother's face.

Sabrina: I-I mean, it'll probably still be a while before I do it, you know? I mean, there's so much else going on, with the wedding and upcoming birthdays, and Marquise texted me recently saying we'll need to have a chat, I don't know what about, maybe the arrangement for the summer or-

Scarlett: Sabrina, breathe. I'm not telling you to propose tomorrow. You could propose 50 years from now and I'd be perfectly fine with that. I'm just saying, no matter what you have my blessing. Okay?

Sabrina: Yeah... okay. Thanks, Mom.

Scarlett: Anything for you, hun.

In the end, Sigrid's bridal shower was filled with love, good advice, and good memories. With the wedding tomorrow, Sigrid didn't realize just how much she needed the fellowship of her family, both old and new. Now she feels more ready than ever to marry Robin and seal her future forever.

#sims 4 fontenot legacy #sims 4 legacy challenge #sims 4 legacy #sims 4 modded #sims 4 #simblr #ts4 #ts4 simblr

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gaypleasantview · 1 year

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dirk (and dustin if u want) for the ask meme? :3

hell yeah!!

Dirk:

Sexuality Headcanon: gay, i enjoy other headcanons for him too but the version of Dirk that lives in my head is definitely homosexual/homoromantic, just feels so right to me. im thinking of putting him on the asexual spectrum somewhere (where is my drink) probably demisexual. his type is probably straight up someone like Dustin if we're being honest here

Gender Headcanon: trans guy! came out as a kid long before Darleen passed away and got lots of support from his parents about both his sexuality and gender <3 i don't know if he realized both around the same time but he knew himself pretty well pretty early on, good for him

A ship I have with said character: ever since i realized the possibility of Dustin/Dirk it has changed my life lol. like it was really always there and it's such an obvious set up but it went completely over my head like it did for most of us i guess, the way maxis seemingly intended is good too because Lilith/Dirk feels like a very exciting couple to play with if you see Dirk being attracted to girls/whatever gender you hc Lilith as. D&D live in my mind rent free tho. it's an easy enemies to lovers for me and some would argue that trope is overdone but there is not nearly enough content about these two that fit the trope perfectly sooo i wanna make that content. speaking of Dirk in this relationship, at first he admits Dustin is cute but hates the dude's attitude so he's gonna be in denial about his Dustin situation for the longest time. he's probably gonna be the one to make this actual relationship happen even though he's gonna be scared. but when Dustin opens up Dirk starts feeling really comfortable with him and falls in love deeply

A BROTP I have with said character: easily him and Lilith, in my hc she's a lesbian and they are fake dating while actually being besties so they don't even have to pretend much. these two are an opposites attract situation too but their energies match so well?? i should probably make them other friends though because no one has more than 2 friends in my stories 😭 i mean Dirk's also good friends with his dad but. yeah

A NOTP I have with said character: this must be about romance but i don't have much to say so i'll talk about enemies instead in this question. well i dont believe he has enemies aside from Dustin and that one's not exactly fitting for this question as we already know so probably no one lol. Dirk doesn't like Angela too and i never realized until just now btw that his relationship with her after he gets with Dustin is gonna be REALLY AWKWARD

A random headcanon: he's a giant bookworm, tries to be the best at everything and is quite grumpy, i feel like he would be very successful in college because he's just a shining star however you look at him. absolute delight (but can be a bitch). he loves cats and the color purple (i actually thought of making it his signature color but he's already assigned blue by maxis so im confused). also a big taylor swift fan

General Opinion over said character: gives off rainy vibes but is actually such a sunshine. i love him so much and im so glad i discovered how great of a character he is a few years ago, he's a certified son of mine (it's actually crazy to think that if he's a teen he's younger than me... like that is a noticeable age gap. huh)

Dustin:

Sexuality Headcanon: i would say the definition that feels right to me is homosexual/biromantic, sometimes i think it could be one or the other but i always remember that it doesn't have to because sexuality is a wide spectrum and im very happy to represent someone who has different romantic and sexual attraction! his gayness is powerful and i also cherish the girl-liking side of him and i think it's beautiful. i don't know if he's allosexual yet but i feel like he's probably demiromantic i hadn't even realized that until just now! im excited

Gender Headcanon: im still wondering about this, i see him as a guy and currently as cis, i really like the idea of him being trans but given how i hc him and his family i feel like by the age of 16 he would be unlikely to freely express himself or maybe even discover himself at all? he's quite emotionally repressed and doesn't give himself time to process his feelings so he probably wouldn't even know what the feeling means if he had it. hmmm

A ship I have with said character: Dirk ofc. Dustin didn't know he was gay and likely had inner homophobia but after meeting Dirk he knew what was up and he embraced it (after they stopped hating each other first heh). he had a pretty wonderful relationship with Angela so i like these two a lot together but with Dirk it's just a whole another story. Angela is like a comfort place and with Dirk it's like a rollercoaster and Dustin is just addicted to the feeling. he will be the first one to make a move but it's gonna be in a bit of a stupid way of course because he's secretly really awkward so it'll take time for them to actually see what's up

A BROTP I have with said character: Angela. she helps him with the kids and just generally spends so much time with him and they genuinely love each other so much as bf and gf but then as friends too, the breakup is hard for Angela but after some time it definitely gets better and they are just a great couple of peeps who care for each other :) i would say i need to get Dusty other friends too but i'll be honest with you i don't even think he has any. poor boy i gave him like 2 or 3 nice points

A NOTP I have with said character: Lilith hates Dustin and wouldn't engage 😭 she learns to tolerate him but imagine these two put in a room they would fight to death

A random headcanon: Dustin is a huge family boy and the only times he is genuinely expressing his feelings is when he is with his little siblings. Brandi and him have a weird relationship that is full of fights but in its core their relationship is not the worst, she's a loving mom just not very good at it. he probably has some obscure hobbies but i don't remember which rn. he likes sports (sadly). he's a very angsty teen and 100% listens to angsty teenage music in his room. he's gonna be such a great man in college when he matures and starts being honest with himself about things and this is the best glow up ever

General Opinion over said character: i love Dustin. i am so proud of his growth and bravery <3 he is kind of a menace in the beginning of my story, super mean but i don't want to throw him under the bus because his soul is so beautiful. wait is that bus thing even a saying or did i make that up. anyways boy needs therapy and hugs

thank you so much for the ask!!! this is really long but i love talking about them <3

#dirk dreamer #dustin broke #project: cr #sim ask things #socialbunny

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cassandrajoybellbittner · 3 months

Text

*Warning Adult Content*

FAR FROM HUMAN - Chapter 9

Len

When werewolves were in heat, they took precautions to mask their scents for the sanity of unmated wolves.

When recessive wolves were in heat, they did nothing because they couldn't even smell themselves in the first place.

Adyen seemed to be in heat and was oblivious to it.

I started to mouth breath when Adyen and I got into the elevator together.

His scent was intoxicating... like sweet baked goods.

Lots of wolves in Peace River smelled like fruits and plants.

Ahote had smelled like peaches.

It used to drive me crazy but Adyen's was even more overwhelming.

It was a bit artificial but that was what made it more unique and captivating.

I noticed a variation in the smell of wolves in Toronto.

A lot of the smells foreign because they were from immigrant wolves. Pheromones were a mark of a group and it often adapted and evolved based on what smells were attractive and more common in an area.

The smells flooding the cityscape ranged from perfume to food and stand out scents like mint, glue and bleach.

There were also out of place smells like those from hybrid coyote wolves and wolf dogs that were common in urban areas.

"Is something wrong?"

I blinked at the sound of Adyen's voice, turning to him when the elevator dinged as the doors drew open.

"You don't look too well," he went on, walking out of the elevator with me.

I swallowed the spit building up at the back of my mouth before shaking my head.

His smell was a lot better when we weren't confined to a blocked off area.

When I got to my apartment, I unlocked the door before taking a hold of the handle and pushing it forward.

The door creaked open and we walked into the living room.

The first thing I noticed was that Augustine and Jasper had left the place in a mess.

Clothes and books were scattered about and someone had left some dirty dishes on the center table.

I felt a wave of embarrassment hit me as Adyen moved from behind me to walk towards the sofa.

I felt self-conscious having Adyen in here.

'Those dummies,' I groaned.

I was very sure I had told them to clean up after themselves this morning.

I had called Adyen to come over on my way back home and he had reached the apartment before I could go upstairs and check things for myself.

I made a mental note to chew them out when they got back this night.

"Your roommates?" Adyen asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.

He was standing by the sofa now, holding a shirt that belonged to Jasper.

He seemed to be looking for where to put it and just settled with letting it fall to the floor.

"Yeah," I muttered, watching as he took a seat before dropping his bag at the foot of the couch.

After staring at him for a bit, I walked over to the sofa before taking a seat beside him.

"I share the place with friends of mine," I added, making Adyen hum as he nodded.

He was wearing a green cashmere sweater over blue jeans today.

He seemed tired but he still looked adorable.

Or maybe that was just his pheromones distracting me.

I didn't know.

We sat in silence for a bit, not doing anything. Adyen kicked his feet.

He had left his shoes at the door and his grey socks matched the color of the carpet.

I picked at my nails, trying to think of something to do.

I had asked him to come to hang out but I hadn't planned anything past that.

Typical of me.

'You could kiss.'

My face warmed up when my wolf offered up a suggestion.

'Oh, for fuck's sake,' I cursed in my mind, closing my eyes for a bit to calm myself down.

Sometimes, having a wolf's sex drive was exhausting.

"Are you sure you're okay, Len?" his question made me blink before turning to look at Adyen.

I found myself scooting away when I realized how close he was.

He could have leaned forward and kissed me if he had wanted to.

"If you say so," he said, looking away.

"So, what should we do?" he asked and I hummed, looking about the apartment.

I could get up and grab us something to eat or we could watch T.V. until it was time for him to leave.

We also had homework due in a few days for one of our preliminary classes but I wasn't sure if Adyen had brought his MacBook with him to work on.

"We could talk I guess," I shrugged.

"We can get to know each other a bit more."

Adyen seemed to contemplate this.

He bit his thumb's nail as he stared down at the floor.

"Can I ask you something?" he asked, looking over at me.

I blinked, wondering where the sudden urgency had come from.

"What?" I asked, playing along anyway.

Adyen bit down on his bottom lip, nibbling it before letting out a sigh as he ran his fingers through his short curls.

"Maybe I'm going crazy but I need you to be honest with me," he said, staring out into the room.

"If I'm right, don't lie," he insisted before turning to face me.

"Don't lie to me," he repeated when I didn't say anything after that.

"Promise," he added, reaching out his pinkie finger.

I wanted to laugh but the fact that he was being so serious made a small smile form on my face.

"I promise," I said, reaching out to join our fingers.

The feeling sent a shiver through my body and I had to control the part of me that wanted to touch him more.

I might be part animal but Adyen wasn't mostly human and I had to interact with him in a way that he was comfortable with.

After a bit, he took his finger away and proceeded to stare at me for a while.

He let out a few deep breaths before speaking.

"You're not... we're not human, are we?" he said as his brown doe eyes stared at me.

Adyen's words made my blood run cold.

I shifted, looking down at the sofa as I balled my hands into fists.

"Len, you promised not to lie to me," Adyen said when I didn't give him a response.

With a deep breath, I looked up at him, wondering how much he knew and what exactly he was getting at with that question.

"We're not," I muttered, deciding to be honest with him.

His eyes went wide.

Maybe he had been expecting me to call his guess bullocks.

His lips parted like he wanted to say something but nothing came out.

"Oh," he finally let out, looking away from me before staring out into the living room.

The brief reply was laced with so much shock and bewilderment.

The wall clock ticked in the background and the sound of construction going on outside filled what would have been the silent void.

I wondered what was going through Adyen's mind.

He was frozen in place as he tried to process what I had just told him.

"What are we?" he asked in a small voice... almost a whisper.

He seemed scared that someone would hear us if we weren't careful.

"Wolves," I said, being straightforward with him.

"We're wolves," I repeated, feeling a wave of relief hit me.

It was nice to have the truth out.

He turned, frowning a bit.

"Wolves?"

"Yes," I muttered.

"Wolves," I repeated watching as his eyes pooled with confusion.

"We don't have to talk about any of it now..." I trailed, noticing how lost in thought he was.

"We'll take it slow. You can ask me questions... it doesn't have to be today. I'll answer them with time, I promise," I said, watching as he blinked before narrowing his eyes at me.

"Wolves, as in werewolves?" he asked and I smiled, reaching out to touch his face.

He looked shocked but I couldn't help myself.

"Yes, werewolves," I muttered, rubbing his cheek with the base of my thumb before taking my hand away.

"You're recessive so you don't have a wolf form," I explained but it only seemed to make him more confused.

"Recessive?" he asked, pulling his feet up on the couch.

He hugged his knees to himself, staring at me as he waited for an explanation.

"One of your parents was a human or two of your parents were recessive," I explained and it seemed to click for him then.

His lips drew into a thin line and the confused expression on his face was replaced with a blank one.

"You might have to talk to your parents," I muttered, realizing that I had told Adyen something they purposely kept from him for whatever reason.

"I think they're in the best position to explain that to you."

Adyen's eyes clouded and his voice cracked with the chuckle he let out.

"I don't have parents," he said and all I could do was stare at him.

"I'm an orphan."

He had meant for that to come off in a matter of fact tone but the underlying discomfort with sharing that fact with me shone through.

All I could do was stare at him.

I wasn't sure if reaching out to touch him was okay and I wasn't sure what to do with the information he had just shared with me.

I hadn't known that or even guessed it.

I don't know why I had never considered the possibility.

It made so much sense.

"I'm sorry," I said and Adyen shrugged his shoulders.

"Sorry for what?" he asked and I remained silent.

The construction paused outside and the awkwardness loomed.

"Can I ask another question?" Adyen asked and I nodded.

"Was there a reason you reached out to me? I think I know that the people at the pizzeria were werewolves and I do think I've 'sensed' some other werewolves in school now but why did you talk to me? Why me? And how come no one did it first?"

Adyen's question swam in my head as I tried to look for a way to explain things to him.

Would he freak out if I mentioned what mating was?

"I..." I started but I couldn't bring myself to continue.

My eyes flickered down at my hands.

I squeezed them into fists multiple times as I tried to relax.

I looked up at him again but my face was burning and the words at the tip of my tongue were refusing to roll out.

Why did Adyen have to ask that?

"It's not something weird..." Adyen rose a brow.

"Is it?"

And just like that, the issue became three times harder to address.

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sixofpomegranates · 2 years

Note

I was kissed by the imagination fairy and wanted to write this. As I made the moodboard I decided that this was a story with a black female reader. I don't know, smut is smut no matter your skin color. It just came to my mind and now it's canon, so... Also, Plus-Size or not, both fit here! 👍🏻

This is set between seasons 4 & 5!

- Love, Lynn

Honey

•{One Shot Masterlist}***{Requests/Feedback}***{Guidlines}•

← Previous Part | Next Part →

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Black!Fem!Reader

Summary: Reader is going to leave the country but her best friend Spencer can't stand to lose her.

CW: Smut - 18+ | Mentions of Academic Pressure/Hard Working Parents/Unhappy with Job/Past Toxic Relationship, Penetrative Sex (Protected, Mirror, Rough), Oral (F), Fingering, Hidden Feelings, Nickname for Reader (Honey/Hun, Good Girl)

Academic achievement isn't everything.

I know, shocking. It took me long enough to figure it out myself, honestly.

All my life, I had searched for my parents' approval. Being the smartest in class, studying until I was no longer fueled by sleep but by coffee and energy drinks, crying, and putting myself down whenever I felt like I hadn't done my very best.

My family had never meant it to be like this but as the first person in my family to be accepted into an Ivy League College and before that in one of the most expensive and prestigious high schools, it wasn't like the pressure hadn't been there.

Every day I watched my parents work their butts off, putting every penny left to spare into my education fund. If I'd let them down, I'd singlehandedly ruin what they had worked for since my birth.

So I studied, and studied, and studied some more. Lived my youth in a library doing research on school papers and extracurricular work, instead of being young and enjoying life.

After college, I started working for the FBI. More detailed, I was the personal assistant to SES Erin Strauss, Section Chief of the BAU.

I had studied and worked all my life, to bring a woman who was making five times more than me her coffee, schedule her appointments, and do her dirty work. Don't get me wrong, she could be nice... when she wanted, but for all the effort I had put in, it simply wasn't as rewarding as I had expected it to be.

Trying to hold up my chipper spirit, I still tried seeing the good in everything. At least having me right next to her had swiftly earned me the nickname 'Honey' due to my soft nature next to her difficult one.

I did my work the best that I could, made sure I'd make at least one person a day smile, and tried to figure out if I had hobbies besides being the best in class.

One thing I quickly noticed, I didn't. I hadn't thought of anything other than studying and going to school all my life, so I was left with a very mild, yet lasting, existential crisis.

This crisis only increased as Erin Strauss, the kindhearted woman that she was, started having me eavesdrop on her subordinates. She hated almost everyone working in this Unit and to say that she wasn't disgruntled as I had not been able to find dirt on each one of them, would be an understatement the size of Nebraska.

But this mean task had led me to make friends... With exactly those people she had me spy on. Especially Spencer Reid.

He was sweet, considerate, and due to his intelligence, already an agent in the field although being only a few years older than I was. He was very introverted and reserved, which for some reason matched me extremely well.

I'd like to consider myself introverted, but this job had me to be an introvert in an extroverted disguise.

We would do all the things he loved together, reading, shopping for books, playing chess – which he had to teach me first – and watching foreign movies and old TV shows while eating Chinese food.

With forks, since he couldn't wrap his head around how to use chopsticks.

Next to him and the rest of the people of the BAU, I was able to develop some real interests and enjoy my early twenties.

While I worked out with Morgan, shopped for baby clothes with JJ, dined with Aaron and Rossi, and read books with Reid, Emily would go out with me and Penelope and we'd get drunk, living through the funniest of situations.

For instance, one time, Penelope had been sat into an empty shopping cart by Emily and she began pushing it down the road, causing her to actually get caught by a speed camera.

In one of those funny coincidences you never believe to exist outside of books and movies, I had then met a young man, I fell for head over heels. It caused some issues between me and Spencer I couldn't understand and refused to believe him when he told me that Daniel was bad news.

For months Spencer and I didn't talk. He refused to, while I was in a relationship with Daniel. Not even during the case of The Reaper. The women of the BAU, my friends, tried to explain it as Reid being jealous, being in love with me.

And they were right, I knew that this was what it was, but as much as I noticed me feeling the same for him, I was still in the midst of finding out who I was and wanted to be.

It wasn't the right time for us. And frankly, I didn't know if there would ever be a right time for us. Especially with my heart starting to get called far away from America.

Still, he was there in a heartbeat when I broke up with Daniel and I had called the boy genius crying. We had made up the same evening, of course, under the disguise of him simply not having liked Daniel.

This very first, very serious relationship had ended in toxic flames as Daniel – who really wanted to become an artist – had realized that I was better at his craft than him. Yet, it had left me with a love for drawing, especially digital art became a quickly perfected love of mine.

And the more I fell in love with it and noticed how happy it made me, the more I realized that the FBI didn't.

And therefore, for the first time in my life, I chose that I was no longer seeking success but rather would go out into the world and seek happiness.

My parents weren't happy, couldn't understand why I had started an online business selling my digital art as posters, stickers, buttons, and even more merchandise. Less they could understand when I decided to 'throw away' this secure job at the FBI and instead chose to leave America in my pursuit of happiness.

Thankfully, my friends understood it. Emily even more so than the others. She had lived in so many parts of the world, that she offered me to help me find work through her connections.

"Pick a place and we'll get you a job," she had said. And she had kept her word.

I had chosen England and she had set me up with a nice, decently paid office job for Interpol. And once more, I had lost Spencer. He hadn't thought I would make my decision so quickly after my breakup and since he handled change very badly, I had broken his heart with this.

It was what it was. Things changed, that was how the world worked. And if I had to lose Spencer to find myself, it was a sacrifice I was willing to make. No matter how much it hurt.

When my days at the BAU now came to an end and I officially was done transitioning my entire life onto another continent, the team – minus Spencer – surprised me with a beautiful 'Goodbye' party that had me in tears and promise that we'd always stay in touch, even if the Atlantic Ocean was separating us.

After dinner and drinks, we said our goodbyes, Penelope staining my top with her makeup fueled tears, and I hailed a cap.

I no longer had an apartment in DC, and since I was leaving tomorrow, I lived in a hotel next to the airport. All I owned in the States was currently a suitcase filled with three books – one for each reading mood I could have – and a bunch of different clothes I tried their styles of out. The ruffles, sweaters, and cottage core definitely started to become my favorite.

Just as I was about to go to bed, it knocked on my hotel room door. Opening it without thinking twice, my eyes met the gaze of Spencer, standing there with a plastic bag.

"Spence," I whispered surprised, him scratching the back of his head.

"You- You should always check who's at the door first. You didn't know who was coming to see you-" Stopping himself, he scowled. "I'm sorry. Were you expecting someone?" His voice had held the same tone it had when talking about Daniel for a second.

Shaking my head, I giggled, "Nope. Just living dangerously." He glanced at me with a raised eyebrow, not as amused by my joke as I was.

"Can I come in?" He asked, making me quickly step aside and then close the door behind him. "You're leaving tomorrow," he said, not facing me but looking around the room.

"Yeah," I mumbled, sitting down on my bed. "What are you doing here?" I asked boldly since he hadn't even made an appearance at my party.

"I don't want you to leave," he said, after swallowing hard.

A frown appeared on my face. "A little too late for that. But it's not a goodbye forever-"

Interrupting me, Spencer exclaimed loudly, "Of course it is. I have experienced this often enough. Gideon, Elle, my father. They all said 'We'll keep in touch' and then I never heard from them again. I lost them and now I'll lose you just because you decided to move to Britain."

"Because I am unhappy here, Spencer," I told him, noting the tears in his eyes. "And I know you've been left before but this is not the same."

With a sarcastic smile on his face, he whispered, "Awfully feels like it though."

"But it isn't," I cried out, unable to keep my own emotions on track.

He was the person I was the closest to, the one that had influenced me and my personality the most, and he hadn't talked to me in weeks, and that only shortly after ignoring me for months.

"I am miserable, Spencer, and it kills me living a life that is only to fulfill the expectations of my parents. If I don't change my life now, I will get stuck here and stay like this until I pull a Virginia Woolf, just that my pocket will not only hold stones but also all my hopes and dreams."

Wiping tears from my face, I began looking onto the floor. I had been ready for this new chapter of my life, had been so excited. But now that I saw Spencer and got reminded that I had to leave him and my uncertain, romantic feelings for him on this continent, I started to feel homesick before even entering the airport.

"Honey, I just ..." He started, taking a deep breath. "I don't like imagining a life without you."

"I don't like it either," I said, smiling bitterly. "But it's not like I am completely gone, I swear. I'll just move from being a main character to being a side character with special appearances. But I really need to know that you won't just ignore me again when I get into that plane tomorrow."

Spencer cackled, blinking away some of the tears in his eyes. "After all the drama I made because I don't wanna lose you, you should rather be careful that I don't try climbing into your suitcase and leave with you."

We both smiled at each other, and after it started to feel like we were right back where we had left our friendship weeks ago, I pointed at the bag he was holding. "What's that?" I asked, making him sit next to me on the bed and handing it to me.

"Just some souvenir so you won't forget home," he said.

Reaching into the bag, I pulled out a pink teddy bear having 'I <3 DC' embroidered on it.

"Spence," I whispered, feeling tears running down my cheeks while I hugged the bear. "God, that's cute."

Smiling his arms went up to gesture while he explained, "I plan on sending you a souvenir every year until you come back."

Shaking my head, laughing, I looked between him and my bear. "I'm gonna call him 'Travel-Size Spence'," I snickered.

"The teddy is pink!" Spencer exclaimed, making me nod. "I know. It's not like colors have genders."

We both started laughing while I flung the plastic bag onto the floor and the teddy on my bed. "We should become pen-pals," I announced grinning, and he rose his eyebrows.

"Wouldn't be using the phone be faster? You're already going to be 3674 miles away from me."

"You don't like using your phone," I remembered him, feeling butterflies in my stomach by the thought that he'd said 'away from me' as if I belonged to him. "Also is nobody writing letters anymore. So it would be something really special every time we hear from each other."

He nodded. "I like that idea. You're right, it would be something special just for us."

Sitting back further onto my bed, I just wanted to ask Spencer if he'd be up for some 'goodbye' pizza, but his deep sigh interrupted my plan.

"I should've talked to you sooner. Now those are our last moments together," he said clearly annoyed at himself.

I smiled, poking his melodramatic shoulder, "What would you've wanted them to be instead? Technically, everything we do before you leave is our last moment together."

Turning to me and looking me up and down, I watched him licking his lips nervously. It wasn't like he was checking me out, no, not Spencer. Especially not since I sat there without makeup, in my leggings and baggy, washed-out shirt with Batman print on it.

As our eyes met, it felt like everything started to move in slow motion while at the same time moving in lightspeed. Cupping my cheeks, he practically threw himself at me, his lips crashing onto mine.

The kiss was as wanton as it was gentle, a combination I had never expected to even exist.

Spencer's lips, however, felt just like I had caught myself imagining them in lonely nights, that had left me longing for somebody, but only let me imagine him.

Losing our breaths, his hands started leaving my cheeks, wandering down my sides, and grabbed my thighs. Pulling on them with more swift elegance than I'd imagined him to possess, he had me lay on my back while moving over me.

As we finally parted to let some oxygen into our lungs, he backed away, his face looking as red as mine felt hot.

"Sorry," he whispered, brushing his hair behind his ear. "I- I shouldn't have done that."

Jumping up from bed and straightening his clothes, he couldn't hide the bulge between his legs. Solely a men-problem I hadn't to fear since he couldn't see how wet this view made me.

As I just continued to stare, he looked at me like a deer caught in the headlights of a car. Then he walked to the door.

As his hand rose to the handle, I asked, "Are you leaving?" He nodded. "It's not like I could stay after this."

I wasn't sure what I was thinking about this, but if he left now, we would never talk to each other again. We'd be too embarrassed to do so. This kiss had been filled with suppressed lust and we both had felt it.

Maybe we could afford one last mistake before I left and things would become completely different altogether.

"Why not?" I asked blatantly, him turning to me mortified. "Because you're my best friend, hun." I nodded. "So?"

"I don't wanna ruin our friendship," he said, making me lick my lips which still held his taste.

"It's not ruining it, if we don't read anything into it," I mumbled sheepishly, fully aware of how horny I must've sounded, suggesting my best friend to stay and fuck my brains out before I left the country tomorrow.

"What should we read into this, then?" Spencer asked, letting go of the door and stepping closer to the bed again. He clearly was as interested in this stupid idea as I was, else he would've already left.

"Nothing. We're just two friends having a last 'conversation' before I leave," he let a hand run through his light brown hair, looking at me like he wasn't sure if I was just playing with him.

"And you want this... conversation?" He finally asked, Adam's apple bobbing in his throat.

I nodded, thinking any of my emotions holding onto the 'what ifs' of this would leave after it. "Really badly. And you?" "Even more," he said, voice having become deeper. "So, just tonight and it won't change a thing?"

"It's just a conversation," I whispered as he stepped closer to the bed, stalking me with his hazel eyes so dark I couldn't make out their color anymore. "Nothing more, nothing less."

Crawling back onto the bed, he kicked off his shoes. The closer he came, the more I backed back onto the bed. When my head ungracefully hit the headboard, I stopped.

Spencer climbed between my legs, a dark grin on his face. "You're so beautiful, always were. It was the first thing I noticed about you," he whispered, hands gliding up my sides.

My hand rose to his pale cheek, showing me the contrast between us. I pressed my lips on his again, my hands first moving up into his hair then down to his tie.

While I was busy popping the buttons of his dress shirt, his hands began to roughly grope my breasts. We gasped into each other's mouths, both noting how much we loved touching the other in such an un-friendlike manner.

Spencer started rhythmically rocking himself against me. His hard cock pressed directly against my clit, and the clothes between us caused a wonderful friction merely his cock inside me could surpass.

As I grew impatient with the shirt and simply ripped it open, sending the last three buttons flying. Breaking our kiss, I let myself fall back into the pillows, a moan coming from my lips.

"Fuck..." Spencer growled, grinding himself harder against me. "That sounded hot."

With a quick peck on my lips, he set back on his heels. As he looked down on me, for the first time he wasn't the sweet guy I loved to spend my time with but definitely the hottest man I had ever seen, and couldn't wait to feel inside me.

Spencer grabbed the band of my leggings and with one strong pull, pulled them including my panties down. After throwing the tangled in itself piece of clothing across the room, he spread my legs, shamelessly looking at my wet cunt.

"Are you still okay with this?" He asked with this rasp in his voice that made me nod frantically.

"So okay," I answered. "You?" He smiled. "Even more than before."

His hands slight down my inner thighs, making me shiver. Spreading them further for him, he gave me the dirtiest grin I had ever seen.

"So, so beautiful. And tonight, you're mine."

I whimpered. Honest to God, whimpered. It was this slight amount of unusual dominance, the cold air against my wet core, and how his head slowly started moving down towards it.

The last inches, his movements seemed painfully slow. As impatient as I was, I grabbed his hair, trying to make him go down on me sooner.

Thankfully he obliged, grinning before running his tongue flat over my clit. At my groan, he chuckled before beginning to suck on my clit. His tongue ever so often licking through my folds tasting my wetness.

"Good. Fuck, Spencer. So good," he had me begging in no time, having me evaluate my former belief that he was pretty inexperienced.

My head was too often thrown back into the pillows to notice it but when I felt his fingers at my entrance, I looked down at him.

Our eyes met and he lifted his mouth off my clit. As he carefully insert a finger in me, he waited for my high-pitched moan before his mouth went back to work on me.

Pumping his finger in and out of me with a gentle speed, his eyes were still focused on me, his mouth growling against my flesh whenever I moaned.

Through my bliss, I somehow noted how he moved his hips against the mattress to relieve himself of some of the pressure he was feeling. Especially after adding another finger into me.

Knowing that he was just as turned on as I was, did unspeakable things to me. I needed Spencer, I needed more than just his mouth and fingers.

"Spence, please," I moaned, nails digging into his skull. "Please, I need more."

Propping himself up on his elbows, he looked at me with his big puppy eyes. "I just want to make you feel good, [y/n]."

My heart skipped a beat, leaving me breathless. I lifted myself, making Spencer back away and sit back on his heels.

Jumping on my knees, I threw my arms around his neck, kissing him passionately. He moaned surprised, I almost had knocked him off the bed in my eager state.

"Careful, Honey," he chuckled into the kiss, while I pushed his dress shirt off his shoulders and at the same time onto the floor.

"Need you. Now," I mumbled, unable to leave my lips from his.

Gently pushing me away and pulling my shirt over my head, he whispered, "I'd give you everything."

I grabbed his belt, opening his pants, while my lips wandered down his neck, sucking hickeys into his creamy white skin that would stay with him even when I was long gone.

Happy with my work, I pecked his lips again and he got off the bed, taking off his pants and socks. Pulling him back onto me by the waistband of his boxers, our lips met again.

By now they were red, swollen, and sore but we still couldn't help ourselves to not be indulging in the aphrodisiac that was our kisses.

When we, once more, had to part to breathe, he looked at me with a frown. "I don't have condoms with me," he mumbled, the word 'condoms' actually making him blush.

God, this man was an enigma.

He let me get up and watched me dig around in my suitcase. When I finally found one, I lifted it with a victorious smile. I was gonna get something tonight.

Spencer chuckled, while I jumped back onto the bed enthusiastically, hands instantly all over him. Enough waiting, I wanted him right now.

Taking the condom from me, he looked over to the mirror wall across from the right side of the bed. Following his gaze, I immediately knew what he was thinking. I laid onto my stomach, facing the mirror and watching us both through it.

Spencer's eyes went from surprised to hungry, he quickly got up, taking off his boxers and flashing me with his - impressive - length.

Okay, my best friend was packing. Holy shit.

"Close your mouth, you're gonna catch flies," he snickered, pulling the condom over his erection.

"S-Sorry. I just... Fuck me," I stuttered surprised, making him laugh as he climbed behind me, holding my gaze through the mirror.

"I'm working on it," he said cockily, lifting my hips while my upper body still laid flush on the mattress.

I gasped excitedly as he began moving his tip up and down my wet slit, coating himself with my natural lubricant.

As he came to a hold, cock at the entrance of my cunt, he searched for my eyes. "Ready?" He asked, making me nod.

"Yes." My answer had been merely a whisper, the moan following as he entered me with one solid thrust wasn't.

My eyes rolled back and my head fell into the sheets. God, he was big, stretching and filling me more than I could be ever hoped for.

"Fuck, you're tight," he breathed behind me, leaving me to almost inaudible giggle as I looked back at him. Sure, I was the one outperforming probabilities.

"You feel so good," I moaned already intoxicated by the sex we were going to have, rocking back against him. "Yeah?" He asked me, thrusting his hips forward with this cocky grin.

My answer stayed a nodding and desperate whimpers. Spencer began pounding into me, slow but so rough, I literally wanted to use the phrase 'rearranging my guts' to describe it.

Though, he smiled down at me sweetly while doing so, seeming to get drunk on the fact that he made me feel good.

My brain was quickly brought into overload. I was getting fucked by Spencer, my best friend, while he obtained both his sweetness and a rough dominance over my body. I came quicker than I had been ready to, it felt like getting hit by a bus while he fucked me through my orgasm.

I had been used to helping out the guy I was with until now, rubbing my clit, hoping to come. Most of the time Daniel had come quickly when I did and that was it. But Spencer only seemed to get started, having seen my first orgasm as warming up.

He smiled at me, pressing a kiss on my cheek, and then pointed forward towards the mirror with a wink. Propping myself on my elbows, I watched him mercilessly starting to thrust into me, every now and then taking in the view of him fucking me in the mirror.

This guy inside me and my cute, shy colleague couldn't be the same person. Hell, he had blushed when asking for a condom, and now was smacking my ass and clawing into my skin with his nails, all while watching my face through the mirror as he fucked me stupid.

"Sp-Spencer," I whimpered with a grin, making him lean over me and force me to look at him. "Does that feel good?" He asked me softly, moaning into my ear. I nodded, cries leaving my mouth instead of words.

"You're so perfect," he chuckled, and I could feel my legs start to brutally tremble and another orgasm rip through me.

I never came more than once.

"Really not?" Spencer asked, and I realized I had thought out loud. I shook my head, still pulsing around him like crazy.

"That guy really was a loser," he mumbled with possessive pride, making me look into the mirror again. His face next to mine, he glowed. Right now, he was pure sex, no shyness, only desire.

Two orgasms from a man who continued to fuck you really left you feeling sore. I had not known that until now. But this soreness was delicious. Yes, I was overstimulated, and every thrust felt like he was carving his initial deep inside my womb but it also made me feel so special and loved for.

By now he cradled my face like I was a little bird. Delicate. Like I would turn to dust should he touch me too roughly. He moaned my name like a prayer, hips beginning to roll and reach depths inside me nobody else ever had or probably ever would.

Our reflection showed wanton passion but also an uncanny affection. An affection that made me getting pounded by Spencer from behind almost look romantic, almost like we were making love instead of fucking our brains out.

The thought made me smile, looking to my side and meeting Spencer's lips. This was a great mistake to end my time in America with. This was a mistake I would carry with me across the Atlantic Ocean and think of whenever I was going to talk to another man ever again.

I felt Spencer's hand sneak under me, between my legs, and slowly starting to rub my clit. While his thrusts became irregular, it still seemed like he put my enjoyment first.

I focused on the picture of love in the mirror. We were both a mess, tears streaming down my face, love-drunk smiles plastered across both our faces.

I wanted to come again, do as Spencer had planned to, so I began rocking back against him. I was so close, a breeze of air would've probably made me come.

But lastly, it was Spencer's last moaned words before coming that made me fall into the depths of bliss for the third time. "Fuck, [y/n], that's it. I- Good girl."

I came crying out his name, while he did the same with mine on his lips. My face collapsed onto the sheets, Spencer on top of me. I still gasped every time I felt myself pulsing around him, while he would instinctively thrust deeper into me.

A few seconds passed, and pressing a kiss on my sweaty temple. He pulled out of me, leaving for the bathroom.

I took this time to roll on my back, still feeling his touches and tight grip on me. Hopefully, he had left bruises. Even if not dark enough to show, I would still be able to feel them, remembering this night when I was falling asleep on the other end of the ocean dividing us.

I needed to take a shower before my flight tomorrow morning but for now, all I wanted to do was to take a nap. Closing my eyes, I heard the shower turn on and Spencer come out of the bathroom.

"I turned on the shower so the water would turn warm," he told me softly, as I felt the mattress sink in next to me. "If we shower now, you don't have to stress yourself tomorrow."

I chuckled, opening my eyes. "Hey there," I mumbled, noticing that he was blushing again. "Everything okay?"

He nodded, trying to keep his eyes from wandering to my boobs. "Y-Yeah. Are you okay?"

"Uh-huh," I answered, yawning. "Do we like... shower together or...?"

Looking at me like he had asked himself the same, he shrugged, "Technically, did the things to be nervous or flustered about already happen. But if you want your privacy..."

I shook my head. "Give me two minutes ahead to freshen up, kay?"

Getting up, Spencer had been a gentleman and looked away. I was quick to do the necessary to avoid a UTI and got under the shower, hair stuffed into one of those cheap hotel shower caps that I hoped would actually be waterproof.

As Spencer knocked, I told him to come in, and although the silence was first filled with embarrassment, it quickly resolved by him making fun of me and my shower cap.

"Bitch," I muttered, throwing the little shampoo bottle at him since I was an idiot and had sent all my products to London without me.

He chuckled, soaping his body in the overly perfumed shampoo. "I'm just teasing you, Honey. You look cute with that cap. Almost like you wrapped your head into cling wrap."

I rolled my eyes, stepped into the warm shower water, and washed the bubbles off my body. A cold shiver ran down my spine, followed by goosebumps as I felt Spencer kiss my shoulder.

"I'm going to miss you," he whispered, forehead resting against my skin. "Especially now."

I smiled, knowing exactly what he meant. This had not resolved the long felt feelings towards Spencer. No, it had made them worse. Real.

"See it from the good side, I'm going to write you on Hello Kitty stationary. That means every week you'll have a pink envelope waiting for you from your best friend," I giggled.

I could not show him that I felt like staying with him now. Sex and feelings for my best friend weren't enough to keep me here. I needed to find my place in the world and that without it relying on being with a man.

Biting his bottom lip, Spencer chuckled. "I don't know if I should be excited about that or dreading."

I nudged his side at that, nudged him even harder as he tried to steal my shower cap off my head. There were giggles and our typical behavior. Spencer seemed to be on the same page with me.

We were best friends. Nothing more, nothing less. Even if we wanted something else.

The next morning, he helped me carry my suitcase to the airport, I checked in and we said our tearful goodbyes.

In the letter, I received from him a week later, he wrote that he had waited until the plane was in the air, staring out of the window and watching it take off. Actually, he admitted, he had still stood there long after I was gone.

He also asked me to send him a little teddy bear from London, so he too would have the little teddy version of his best friend sitting at home on his bed.

At the very bottom was a quote of French novelist & poet Victor Hugo, saying, "Life is the flower for which love is the Honey."

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lepusrufus · 3 years

Text

To bargain for immortality pt.6 END

There were little things, really, that ended up putting her doubts and theories to rest. Nicole hadn't been an active person since she was five, so the occasional mild fatigue didn't stand out from her normal routine. The headaches that came and went or the tiredness that accompanied nights when she didn't get enough sleep were simply chucked to her body adjusting to its newfound immortality. Sometimes it takes longer for the Cadou to fully settle in, Esteria had reassured her, talking from personal experience as her own mutation took close to two years to be done changing her body.

All the doubt was wiped from her mind when she woke up one evening, the day after another particularly unpleasant experiment run with Miranda, with a splitting headache. It soon turned downright nauseating and hasty steps took her to the bathroom connected to Cassandra's bedchambers, where she all but doubled over, as much as her position leaning on the sink allowed.

Her initial plan was to simply splash some cold water on her face, but that soon went out the window when her throat and mouth were invaded by the familiar sensation of thick blood coming and pouring out. The white porcelain got stained in dark crimson as her heart seemed to beat painfully against her ribcage, making a small whimper escape blood stained lips. This experience in and of itself was not unfamiliar by now, but her own body apparently taking offence to simply existing was a new and unwelcomed development. An attempt to take a deep breath was made, but that only seemed counterproductive as it sent a stinging ache through her chest, so she settled for holding her breath until the pain subsided. A few shuddering intakes of the oxygen her body seemed to scream for later, the room and her reflection finally seemed to stop spinning.

Her eyes landed on the crimson mess in the sink and she let out an exhausted sigh, but before it could be cleaned, the bathroom door that she had left ajar creaked open.

"Heyy- ooo that looks bad," Daniela's voice came from her side, tone as over the top as always with the grimace that pulled at her features.

"Oh this? What do you mean, just a normal Thursday evening," Nicole replied, voice dripping with sarcasm and hands still shaking on the faucet when she turned on the water.

The other redhead didn't seem phased, presumably being Bela and Cassandra's sister does render one immune to sarcasm. Instead she shrugged and occupied herself with her sister's collection of perfumes that were placed on an adjacent counter.

Nicole gave her a look through the mirror while trying to splash some water on the remaining blood stains. "Did you… need something?"

"Dumbass number one and two are practicing some sword fighting in the garden. Thought you'd like to see," came the reply complete with an eyebrow wiggle that gained her a playful shove.

"Give me a minute to change," Nicole said, finally pushing herself off the sink when the nausea subsided back to a mild headache and her face was free of crimson trails.

As promised, when they entered the back garden that stood between the castle and its extensive vineyard, the faint clinking of metal against metal could be heard. It raised in volume as they made their way to an area where a few logs had been set on the grass, that made perfect sitting spots around what the sisters reclaimed as their small personal arena dedicated to occasional training. The vine covered statues and bushes with colorful leaves made for a pleasant spot to simply spend time in too, her wife currently dressed in light training gear and sword fighting coming as a big bonus to the beautiful surroundings.

The moment Cassandra's eyes landed briefly on her, a characteristic smirk pulled at her lips, their ashy tone left visible from the choice to skip lipstick for the time being. Their sparring match got cut short by a sudden low swipe at Bela's feet, that knocked her off balance and sent her on the trampled grass underfoot.

"Show off," she grumbled at her younger sister when offered a hand to get up. She took it, but continued to glare daggers at Cassandra as she dusted off her pants.

Not that the middle sister noticed, having turned and came up to her wife for a tender good morning kiss. She let the hand not occupied by the sword's handle rest on Nicole's cheek, eyebrows pulling into a frown upon noticing the tired look in emerald eyes.

"Are you feeling well? You look pale."

"Yeah yeah-"

"Oh just some mild gut-puking in the form of blood all over your sink," Daniela interjected, giving a fake innocent shrug when Nicole turned to glare at her. "You might wanna get a maid to clean it up, she did a shit job of it."

"I did not!" Nicole protested.

"You forgot the underside," Daniela hummed. "That was some mad splatter there."

She was rendered mute as the youngest sister moved to the small fence portion that was turned into an impromptu weapon holder to choose something and take Cassandra's place in another sparring match. Her glare was interrupted when she noticed her wife's worried expression.

"It's fine, just a mild headache now," Nicole sighed as she brought a hand up to interlace their fingers and pull Cassandra with her so they could both sit where Laura and Anita were. "Any chance I'm getting another performance? Since I missed the last one," she then said, a sly smile making its way on her lips.

That got Cassandra to grin, fangs glimmering in the early evening's soft light in a way that anyone else would find downright menacing. "Of course," she answered, eyes momentarily moving to her sisters.

It looked like Bela was winning, despite Daniela choosing her preferred twin swords that she wielded with an odd mix of grace and chaos. A slip past her guard and a hit with the ornate hilt of Bela's sword was what it took to put an end to their match, the youngest sister stumbling forward and breaking into a swarm before she had the chance to fully lose balance and fall face first into the dirt. She reappeared in front of the blonde, tongue stuck out and nose scrunched in an annoyed grimace, complete with a middle finger. If the Dimitrescu sisters had one thing in common, it was that all three of them were the world’s biggest sore losers.

"My turn to kick her ass," Cassandra perked up, picking up her well polished gladius.

Daniela, still miffed about her previous loss, didn't offer her the grace of getting into a proper stance. A flash of flies later, the clanking of metal ringed around them as Cassandra pushed her back.

"We said no swarm!" Bela called out from where she had found a seat on the grass, right in front of Laura.

The youngest rolled her eyes but complied, the buzzing completely dying down in favor of quick swipes and blocks. What Cassandra might've lacked in speed, she more than made up for in an impeccable defense, being near impossible to get near her body even with the apparent advantage of having an extra sword. Their fighting came to a standstill soon enough, with Daniela unable to get near while also being too quick to let any major hit land.

"My ladies."

Alexandria's voice called out from the entrance of their little makeshift arena, distracting Daniela enough for her sister to quickly swipe at her feet not unlike she had previously done to Bela.

The Steward flinched for a second when a long frustrated growl was heard from the youngest, but cleared her throat and did her best to keep up her characteristic poker face as she addressed Nicole. "Mother Miranda's assistant is here for you."

Her face fell, annoyance and dread both bubbling in her chest at having her pleasant day cut short not even two hours after waking up. She got up and exchanged goodbyes with the rest of her family while grabbing Cassandra's free hand in a silent demand to see her to the door.

On their way out, she decided that old jeans and a slightly oversized shirt that had survived her high school days was an attire appropriate enough to being tortured. It should've been concerning how at peace she had become with that idea, at least to any person with a sound mind. She never declared her sanity intact though.

"I'll see you later," she told Cassandra once they were at the heavy doors of the castle's main entrance, a thumb slowly tracing her jaw.

Emma was impatiently waiting for her just outside and blame the slight inherent meanness she had learned to let free since becoming a Dimitrescu, but Nicole took immense pleasure from the woman's uncomfortable grimace when she pulled Cassandra down in a deep kiss that went on for ten seconds too long. Small victories in the face of doom.

---

Nicole choked out a sob that walked the fine line between crying and screaming when the knife that looked way too big for the woman's hands came down at her elbow's joint with a gut wrenching crack.

It felt like Miranda had an unbeatable talent to never disappoint when someone thought she had reached the peak of inhumane with her experiments. The poisons were dreadful as was everything before that. The test on how well she can heal bullet wounds from the previous day had been downright cruel, only stopping after the results that showed how only a bullet through the head can incapacitate her for a while. Today's experiment on regenerating limbs was starting to eat away at Nicole's remaining sanity. It obviously started small, with fingers, but Miranda was always so keen on pushing limits.

She turned on her side with the remaining hand pressed to tear filled eyes and nails digging into skin as she desperately tried to find some sort of distraction from the pain and tingling that felt like static in her veins. Her temples were already throbbing with a headache and her vision was spinning due to the nausea. Miranda and Emma were having some sort of conversation to the side, but it felt distant through the deafening ringing in her ears as she put all her effort into not throwing up due to the sheer shock her body was going through.

The amount of time she laid there sobbing completely evaded her, not bothering to keep a mental track nor raising her head towards the clock mounted on the wall. She just wanted the healing to move and get it over with.

By the time she was mentally prepared to stomach the sight, her hand was already stitching together muscles covering the newly reformed bone, together with the beginnings of skin close to the incision. She tried moving her finger and flinched into a whole body cringe at how utterly wrong it felt.

The door creaking open took her attention away from the unsightly muscles twitching as they got placed together and into their places.

"Lord Heisenberg is here," announced a man, donning a white lab uniform not unlike Emma's.

"Just on time," Miranda perked up, a dangerously gleeful look in her eyes.

She got up, leaving the assistant with the job of timing Nicole's healing as she went to greet Karl. It went on for almost another torturous minute before the tell tale click of the timer and Emma noting it down marked that her arm was once again whole.

"How- how long was that?" Nicole asked, tentatively moving her hand. Good as new, with the exact same mobility function and sensitivity. The only thing missing was the beige nail polish applied just the night prior.

"Five minutes and twenty," the woman replied, not looking up from her paper.

Another few minutes of silence passed, that Nicole spent flexing her fingers. A bit of hot rage coursed through her veins when she noticed her ring finger, the matching band she and Cassandra had having been left on the desk upon entering the lab. At least Miranda had the decency of not slicing her hand off with the ring still on it, but she still wanted it back.

It wasn't long before Miranda came back, motioning for her to follow. "Come," she said, waiting for Nicole to push herself off the hospital bed and onto her feet.

A small burst of dizziness later, she was standing and shaky legs were taking her towards the woman. "Can I get my ring back now?" She did her best to keep the edge out of her tone, too tired to face her wrath.

Miranda simply thought for a moment before waving a dismissive hand at her. "Fine, it won't be in the way anymore."

Nicole wasn't sure if that was good or downright horrifying.

Most of the rooms in the underground maze of corridors were unknown to her. The structure twisting and turning in dizzying patterns that were enough to disorient anyone not familiar with the layout. Not to mention the occasional tunnel that stretched for entirely too long that led to one place or the other from the town above.

Nicole found herself following Miranda through one such unknown area, the corridors new to her but the look not dissimilar to every other part of the underground structure. If it weren't for the numbered plaques on the door, she wouldn't even be able to tell this was a different area than the ones she's seen before.

Miranda pushed open a door and led her inside. It was definitely more spacious than the labs and the space was mostly cleared out save from a few tables lining the walls and some cabinets. The only thing at the center was Lord Heisenberg and a long metal table, leather straps fastened to its sides and a circular saw blade attached to a machine above.

Nicole took a couple stumbling steps back, hips hitting the corner of a table and rattling the papers placed on it. It seemed to peeve Miranda, who grabbed her wrist impatiently.

"Come now, we don't have all day," she said while slowly dragging her towards the table.

With every shaky step, her knees felt like jello under her and her ears started to ring anew with the panic and dread settling like ice in her veins. Her legs finally gave way under her and she fell to her knees with a pathetic sob.

"No please. Please I can't," she said, one hand meekly grabbing at the goddess' lab coat.

Miranda bent down on one knee, brows furrowed in the feign concern that only she could have perfected to such an art. "We have to," she started, voice so soft one could easily believe it belonged to someone else. "We must know the limits of your regenerative abilities. You said it yourself that you want to know them."

She had but not like this. Not like this.

"Then use anesthesia. Please just don't-" she choked out a sob before the end of her phrase. Not that it was going anywhere, it was just a pathetic attempt at bargaining for less suffering.

Surprisingly enough, there were few instances since coming to the Village when she felt truly and utterly terrified. Anxious and afraid? Sure. But not even Lady Dimitrescu hiring her, or Cassandra taking an interest in freaking her out or even getting shot made her feel the dread she was feeling then. She would've rather spent eternity on the cold hard stone under her knees than budge an inch.

Miranda pursed her lips and lifted her chin with one hand, expression like a mother hearing her child make an outrageously unattainable request. "You know that will interfere with the results."

"Then local anesthesia," Nicole suggested, holding onto some kind of feeble hope by a thread.

The goddess seemed to actually consider it for a moment before shaking her head. A hundred meek protests and cries fell past Nicole's lips and on deaf ears as she was pulled up by the wrist and back on track towards the metal table. Miranda was incredibly strong despite her rather short stature, so any attempt at pulling back was completely useless.

Once at the room's center, she pushed Nicole against the table, frowning when she refused to get on. With a sigh, she grabbed her chin once again, putting slightly more force in the gesture. Both a warning and witness to her growing impatience.

"If you keep still it's going to be much less painful," she promised, though the validity behind her words were doubtful.

Though there was something in Miranda's tone that almost demanded to be believed without question. It may have been the inherent authority that came with being almost divine, a goddess in all ways that truly mattered. Or something else entirely, common to every piece of the Megamycete's web, down to the finest and farthest roots.

With a barely visible nod, Nicole pushed herself onto the cold surface of the table. It was far taller than she was so Karl had to spend a few good minutes readjusting the leather straps on the sides until they were in the right positions to wrap tightly around her limbs.

"Uh… sorry kiddo," he said in a barely audible whisper as he fastened a strap around her forehead. "Here," he pressed a folded cloth to her lips, that she bit down on to at least try to not crack any teeth.

He seemed almost as much of an unwilling participant as she was, lips pulled into a tight line under the scruffy mustache. The only one seeming rather gleeful there was Miranda.

The leather was digging painfully into her skin, the belts having been tightened slightly too much to prevent movement. Not to mention the uncomfortable position, with her hands tied above her head and starting to feel numb. Her head also seemed beyond foggy, the shallow breaths she was taking doing a poor job of providing her body with oxygen, to which it protested with a heart painfully beating against her ribcage, almost as if the small parasite that nestled around it was taking offence itself.

Another sob shook her body, deafened out by the metal sound of the circular blade when it was turned on. Thankfully it was clean. At least Nicole hoped as much. And sharp. If she was going through this she prayed that she would at least be granted the mercy of a clean cut as opposed to shredding of skin and muscle with everything underneath.

She shut her eyes when Miranda raised her shirt enough to expose her abdomen and, as the saw forcefully came down, screams were muffled both by the cloth in her mouth and the deafening roar of the saw.

---

The feeble knock on heavy ornate doors was answered by the tall woman positioned on guard duty that night. Nicole did not remember her name and at the moment it was the least of her worries.

She took a handful of shaky steps inside before clearing her throat in an attempt to not let her voice waver. "Cassandra?"

"Out hunting with her sisters and the other ladies," the woman answered promptly.

Nicole simply nodded once and made her way into the castle as the heavy thud of the shutting doors echoed around her. Her movements seemed on autopilot, eyes only focused enough to watch her step as she made her way through the familiar path up to her wife's bedroom. She barely registered passing through the first set of corridors, the paintings and priceless decor she had grown accustomed to every day becoming a background blur.

She felt downright dreadful.

Her ears were still ringing slightly and exhaustion made her limbs feel heavy and aching with every step. The headache from earlier was also back in full swing and throbbing painfully at her temples.

A quick look at a golden clock mounted on the wall in the main hall reminded her that it was near dawn so the rest of her family must be on their way home.

She flinched, a small jump that threatened to throw her off balance, at the heavy footsteps that came behind her. Throwing a look over her shoulder she saw none other than Lady Dimitrescu, her mother in law, making her way under the low arch of one of the doors leading into the spacious room. Thin black eyebrows were pulled into a frown at the sight of the much smaller woman, hunched over and all but shivering, with dark circles under her eyes having taken an almost purplish hue and dried tear streaks on pallid cheeks.

"Oh hi," Nicole greeted with a wry smile. "I thought you were out hunting."

Alcina waved a hand dismissively, eyes still focused on every minuscule shake of her shoulders. "Paperwork had to be taken care of."

At the explanation, Nicole let out an oh and shuffled her weight from one foot to the other, unsure of how to politely book it up the stairs and under the mountain of blankets on Cassandra's bed. There was no escape, it seemed, as a large hand came to gingerly rest on her shoulder, leading her further in and towards one of the plush couches lined in front of the barely lit fireplace. "Come sit," she offered, face softening in a gentle motherly smile.

Nicole just nodded absent mindedly, sitting barely on the edge of the white cushions decorated with a beautiful intricate floral pattern. She passed clammy hands on her jeans, now covered in fine powdery ash from the crystallized remains of the discarded half of her body after she retrieved them following the night's experiments. A disgusted grimace pulled at her lips, deciding then and there that the pants had to be burned as soon as possible.

"How did the tests go?" Alcina asked, taking her attention away from the ruined piece of garment and being met with distant eyes.

"Good," Nicole whispered, but before the word could even be fully out of her mouth a sob shook her entire body, coming out accompanied by choked out gasps as she all but doubled over in an attempt to make herself smaller than she already was.

The Lady's eyes widened at the sudden outpouring of emotion, so uncharacteristic for the woman in the few years she had been part of her family. "Oh child," she whispered, hands resting protectively on small shaking shoulders.

"Did-" Nicole started but interrupted herself with another shuddering gasp. "Did she- do the same thing to-... to you?"

Alcina grimaced, expression unseen by the smaller woman currently curled in on herself in her arms. It had been so long since her infection, the pain caused by her body acclimating to the Cadou a distant memory. Something that would forever remain seared in her mind however was the cruel ice in their goddess' eyes as she ran test after dreadful test, pushing the limits of her body to see how much she can actually heal. It had taken months to finally be content with the results, after her body's defensive response had been mutating and turning into the giant hungry beast she kept carefully at bay from that moment on. Instead of answering, Alcina decided that the better option was to rub her back slowly, not unlike she had done to her own daughters countless times before, to bring some comfort.

"You will get through this," she promised, unwavering conviction in her tone.

---

Date: 20th May 2012

Subject: Nicole [REDACTED] Dimitrescu

Mutation experiments - 5 (Regeneration- 4)

Testing the limits of regenerative abilities - regrowing body parts

Subject can regrow limbs (arm, served from elbow - 5'20'') and regenerate after being cut in half. If the body is cut with a 50/50 ratio, the upper half will regrow the lower half, prioritizing brain activity and the Cadou's placement. If the proportions are different in favour of the lower half, the upper one may still be the one taking priority; results vary. Up to 80% of body mass can be regenerated. If more than that is destroyed (eg. dissolved using acid) subject will presumably crystallize and enter a dormant state like others infected with a Cadou.

The discarded body parts crystallize and disintegrate into a stony/ashy mass.

---

Miranda's enthusiasm seemed to slowly dwindle after a few more experiment runs, the same effects John Abbott's mutations that caused his untimely death coming to knock at Nicole's door every so often.

"You see," the goddess had said the last time she had called Nicole down in the underground labs. "John was missing the healing abilities, which led to his infection slowly corroding away at his body until his death. You can heal, so you won't die, but the negative effects are still present. So try not to get hurt too much too often," she finished, not even sparing her a glance.

And that was the last Nicole had seen of Miranda, at least as far as one on one experiments went. The woman would still pay the castle a visit every so often, sitting down with Alcina for a glass of wine and having the rest of the family joining in on occasion, when their discussions didn't stray too far into matters of their cult.

She was right too. There were days when a migraine would rudely wake her up in the morning, or when her chest seemed to ache to the point where she was sure the parasite that made its home around her beating heart was trying to escape. The Cadou truly was a wretched little thing, constantly at odds with her body's defenses and trying to slowly but surely cause damage to the point of death. But if there's one thing that very same parasite had bestowed upon her was just… being really good at not dying. The healing abilities were in a continuous cycle of repairing any and all internal damage the infection may have caused on a not so good day. Those times had her doubling over the nearest sink, or suitable container if unlucky, a waterfall of blood carrying all the damaged tissue that had been replaced flowing from her lips in crimson rivulets.

A cruel fate, one may think. Not her though, for the knowledge of how her family had helped her through the change was at the forefront of her mind each time she had to sit down due to a burst of dizziness. Cassandra rubbing gentle circles on her back while she was coughing up the clogged blood in her throat grounded her beyond belief. Then, when everything was said and done, there was always something to get back to. A short vacation originally meant for business but that Alcina would always prolong for just a couple days so they could all spend some quality time away from the Village and the cult and Miranda's scrutinizing ever watchful eyes. Or the season's first hunting trip, the genuine glee on her wife's face never growing old to her. Even life's more mundane events, like the weekly movie night that had half the family groaning at Esteria's choice of vampire media. Rinse and repeat, forever under the castle's imposing towers and inside ornate inviting rooms, always warm and welcoming, always feeling like home to her.

If that was the price she had to pay for eternity, then so be it.

---

Subject Name: Nicole Dimitrescu

Cadou Affinity: Favorable

Brain Functions: Normal

Subject can regenerate at an incredibly fast rate, although healing slows down with loss of consciousness. Shows a similar mutation to John Abbott; able to detect illnesses by specific smells. The latter mutation causes the Cadou to have adverse reactions, causing internal damage that is however kept at bay with the regenerative abilities.

An unfit vessel for Eva.

#unhinged maiden™ my beloved #cassandra dimitrescu x maiden #mother miranda #karl heisenberg #to bargain for immortality #fanfic #lady dimitrescu #tw torture #like big fat tw for this one

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dinosaurtsukki · 3 years

Text

all for a crown (fyodor x gn!reader royalty au)

summary: fyodor dostoevsky wasn't at all like the other members of the royal family. he was polite, gentle, and always remembered your name. unfortunately, you're the one who eventually finds out about his inner motives

word count: 1.7k words

contains: royalty au, assassination, mentions of death and suicide, psychological manipulation, fyodor being himself as usual

anon: *puts 100 dollar bill on table* How about Royalty!AU with Fyodor but he’s evil/planning to take over another kingdom, imagine helping him dress into royal attire as he gets ready for his coronation, ok bye I’m having too much brain rot.

a/n: i... have no words for this fic it's literally just so self-indulgent but omg i love fyodor royalty!au so much you killed me with this request anon also i hope you enjoy the last scene

even after being in his company for only a day, you could tell fyodor dostoevsky was much different from all the other members of the royal family that you had served before. you were in your fifth year of serving at the castle and had met many of them, from duchesses and dukes to even the crown prince himself. needless to say, the best interactions that you had with any of them were when they barely paid any mind to you at all.

but you didn't expect much from them either. they were royalty after all and a poor servant from a far-flung village with nothing else to achieve in life was more than beneath them. living in the servants' quarters of a castle was better than nothing though, so you kept your head down and your work efficient just to get by.

and then came the day when you were assigned to be the personal servant of the young fyodor dostoevsky.

he was the tsar's nephew and a close friend of his son, the young prince. from what your fellow servants told you, fyodor had always been a sickly child and rarely left the castle grounds. the first time you saw him, you couldn't help but notice how pale his skin was and that you could probably wrap a thumb and forefinger completely around his wrist.

but what struck you the most about fyodor were his eyes: dark violet, the color of the robes that the past kings wore in their portraits. and second, was how warm his voice sounded when they greeted you.

"good morning. you must be y/n."

...

hearing fyodor call you by name made you realize that you've haven't heard it from another person's mouth in a long time. you were almost always called with several snaps of a finger or a sharp gaze. but fyodor used your name and never raised his voice. he was polite and the way he addressed you made you dangerously forget your own place. "y/n, if you please, could you fetch my book? y/n, would you be so kind to shut the window for me? y/n, have you had anything to eat? you look famished."

and even though you were expected to wait on him hand and foot for a whole day, it was always easy to run out of things to do. fyodor spent most of his time by himself: visiting the library in the morning after breakfast, practicing the cello by himself in the afternoon, and reading a book in bed at night.

you could tell that he was in need of someone to converse with since his cousin was the only who'd visit him. when it was just you two, fyodor could talk for hours on end though you could never fully understand what he was talking about. but that didn't seem to matter since he appeared to be content that someone was listening.

he was pleasant to be around and waiting on him was the best job you've ever taken in the castle. you enjoyed waking him up in the morning and preparing his meals and even staying at his bedside when he got sick. fyodor was different from all the other nobles you've served.

you were soon going to realize just how different.

...

"y/n... you aren't supposed to be here," fyodor hummed. he sounded as if he was lightly chastising you for breaking a dish but that didn't quite register in your head.

just half an hour ago, fyodor was eating dinner with his cousin in their room. he had let you off early for the night and you were about to return to your quarters when you remembered that fyodor forgot to take his medicine. clearly, you weren't supposed to witness this scene: fyodor's cousin, the crown prince himself, slumped over the table with his wineglass still in hand, spilling red all over the white tablecloth. fyodor himself was calmly swirling the wine in his glass and studying you with those dark purple eyes that now sent shivers down your spine.

"h-his majesty, i--"

"there's nothing you can do about it now, y/n," fyodor cut you off. he didn't look at all like the kind, young man with the gentle smile anymore and you consciously backed away towards the door. of course, he could tell what you were about to do.

"i wouldn't do that if i were you, y/n," he said lowly, placing his glass on the table. "between your word and mine, whose do you think people would believe, hmm?"

a weight sank in your stomach and you felt tears forming. "p-please sir. i-i'll keep quiet, i promise. i promise," you begged.

fyodor left the table and slowly made his way towards you while you were huddled on the floor with the door pressed against your back. he could have his way with your right then and there and you squeezed your eyes shut and hoped this was all just a bad dream.

then, you felt his hand on the top of your head, gently stroking your hair. "oh y/n," fyodor sighed. "shame, i took a liking to you. i would have been content with you personally serving me if you hadn't made this little mistake."

"i'm sorry... i'm sorry," you sobbed.

"hmmm, but i do believe in second chances."

at that, you looked up slowly at fyodor whose hands were still in your hair. maybe this was what selling your soul to the devil was like. "what should i do?" you whispered.

"to begin," fyodor crouched down until he was eye level with you. "you could help me get rid of the body."

...

it was almost funny how easily fyodor framed the murder as the crown prince taking his own life. but how could you laugh when you were now under his thumb? he was right, after all. who would take your word over his?

fyodor's scheme came to a conclusion when a group of noblemen came to his room with the news that he was next in line to the throne. the tsar was sick, you assumed fyodor played a part in that, and the deceased crown prince had no younger brothers. of course, fyodor played his part effortlessly. everything from his sorrowful gaze to his deep sigh leading into "with a heavy heart, i shall take on the crown for the sake of our kingdom."

you were certain his eyes flickered to yours across the room as soon as he spoke those words.

and now, here you were, dressing fyodor for his coronation as per his request. you no longer felt safe around him, knowing he would benefit from disposing you and no one would suspect otherwise. so, why? why were you still alive?

"your hands are trembling, y/n," fyodor observed.

"i-- f-forgive me," you stammered as fyodor sighed and finished buttoning his vest himself.

"if you keep looking that nervous it won't take long for people to suspect you."

"i'll try my best," you nodded. fyodor seemed content with your answer as he gestured for his coat which you hurriedly fetched.

"just button the two in the middle, leave the rest," he ordered. you followed his instructions until finally, you were done dressing fyodor for his coronation.

the way he looked now was a far cry from the sickly, bedridden man you met months ago. his attire was made on short notice, but the seamstresses and tailors did beautiful work nonetheless. his vest was white with gold buttons and stitching. the color of his coat wasn't the usual dark red that the previous tsars had worn. 'it's out of respect for my dear cousin,' fyodor explained.

but the dark, deep purple coat with the gold stitching that matched his vest suited fyodor well. he stood tall and imposing in his black boots made of polished leather. additionally, his raven hair which often hung loose to his shoulders was tied back into a loose ponytail.

fyodor looked like he had always been born to be the crown prince. and, with the way his dark, glittering eyes admired his reflection, you could tell he knew that too.

"you did a splendid job, as always, y/n," fyodor chuckled, turning this way and that in front of the mirror.

"thank you... your grace," you bowed.

"now, now. it's just the two of us here. you can call me by my name."

"v-very well... fyodor," you answered.

"well, i mustn't let the people wait too long," fyodor sighed, eyeing the growing crowd out of the window. "i've already requested a place for you to sit in the cathedral. it's quite far but you'll have a good view of the proceedings."

"thank you, you're too kind," you whispered.

"ah, and one last thing," fyodor took your hand in his and pressed a dark green vial in it. your eyes widened as you quickly realized what it was.

"i-is this--?"

"the duke alexandrei has been suspicious of us lately," fyodor whispered, his gaze darkening. "if you can, slip it into his drink or soup later during the feast."

"but--"

"and he won't die instantly," fyodor cut you off. "this one acts slow and it will appear as if the duke has passed away from the flu."

"you want me to... poison him?" you felt your hands sweat even as they closed around the vial. fyodor gave you a long look before chuckling and patting your head, as if you were a child asking a silly question.

"one of the things i love about you is how naive you are, y/n," fyodor said. "the duke is hardly going to be the last. if you think that i'm the only one who went to such... lengths to achieve what i want, then i'm afraid you're mistaken."

with that, fyodor checked himself one last time in the mirror before walking towards the door.

if only you hadn't walked in on him that night. but then again, even being associated with a man such as fyodor was dangerous enough. you were no different from a poor little mouse who was unfortunate enough to wander into a trap.

"what makes you any different then?" you found yourself asking out loud.

"me?" fyodor paused with his hand on the door. "i'm simply one step ahead of everyone else."

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#bungou stray dogs #bsd #bungou stray dogs x reader #bsd x reader #fyodor dostoevsky #fyodor dostoevsky x reader #fyodor x reader #fyodor #bsd fyodor dostoevsky #bsd fyodor #bungou stray dogs fic #bsd fic #bungou stray dogs one-shot #bsd one-shot #bungou stray dogs angst #bsd angst #bungou stray dogs royalty au #bsd royalty au

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