#and I'm not sure what made folks think it was

[ao3commentoftheday]

On a whim and because I was momentarily taken by a new fandom I had made a requests accepted fic where I took in requests. From a few requests I wrote I got two requests from the same person and wrote them but they were so annoying because all the response I got was "I want this to be longer"

That was something that added to me eventually not being as into the fandom anymore and so I haven't written the other requests for a long while.

It's part many things and is also because the fandom is very very new so the characters' personalities aren't that known yet so I'm not quite sure how to characterize them in my writing. So I feel a bit guilty about not writing the other requests and regret completing the request of the disrespectful person first, I didn't know they'd be like that until they commented that reaction to what I wrote.

Sorry for the ramble but TLDR how does a writer handle feelings of guilt from not completing requests quickly? Like I think it's been months now.

... and it's been even more months since you dropped this ask in my inbox, sorry!

To start with, I'm just going to flag for folks that you should not post "I'm taking requests" works on AO3. It's against the Terms of Service, so if it gets reported, the PAC team will ask you to remove it. You don't say here where you posted yours, but I just wanted to give everyone a heads up on that count.

I'm really sorry that your experience with writing for requests went kind of sour on you. That's never a fun time. I can see how it would sour you on the practice, especially in conjunction with the fandom being new and the characters still not very fleshed out.

When it comes to disappointing people, you kind of have to pick your battles. Human beings these days encounter thousands of people in any given week, thanks to the internet, and we can't hold ourselves to the same standards of caring for a person we've interacted with one via a screen and the people we've built up relationships with.

That isn't to say it's alright to be a dick to people. Wil Wheaton has been very clear about that. It's just that carrying guilt over something you haven't done for a stranger is very different from carrying guilt over something you haven't done for your partner or your best friend.

In my experience, the best way to move forward is just to reply to the message that gave you the request and say, "I'm sorry, I don't think I can work on this right now. Please feel free to share it with another author." You can add in that you hope they find someone. You can change the "right now" to "after all". You can make the message as long or as short as you want, but just include those 2 ideas:

I'm not going to fulfill this request

if you're still wanting to read this thing, ask someone else to write it (or write it yourself)

The guilt is because you know that someone wanted a story and they haven't received it. What you don't know is whether they still want that story, whether they specifically want it from you and only you, and to what degree they were invested in the idea versus just throwing something out there on a whim.

If you do still want to write the stories, remember that fandom is a hobby not a job. Fic requests aren't assignments. You don't have any due dates. Inspiration comes and goes as it pleases, and sometimes we bite off more than we can chew.

Be kind to yourself, anon. Write the stories that interest you. Give away the ones that don't. Allow yourself the time you need to finish what you want to do. 💗

#asks and answers

[worldofkuro]

Painted Smile

Painted Smile XXIII

<- Previous Chapter I

Summary: You couldn't wait to meet new friends. What you didn't expect was this smiling little boy, only one year older than you, that would take such a big place in your life.

Notes: Well, folks. This is the end of Painted Smile season I. I think this is a good way to end the first arc. No worry, Season II is already on it's way, nothing is going to change. I'm still going to post as randomly as I'm doing right now! But please, enjoy today chapter, I liked it.

You were singing in the car with the biggest smile you had on your face. Alastor was behind the wheel, smiling, humming the same tune as your voice. 

You were the next day after your wedding’s night. It has been fantastic. Whenever you were watching there were smiles and laughter. You saw most of the guests having a hangover the morning before you left with Alastor for your honeymoon. 

Alastor didn’t tell you where you were going but from the changing weather you knew you were going south, surely toward the beach. He was holding one of your hands on his lap. Since you have been married, you couldn’t stay away from each other, you wondered how it was going to be once your soul would be bond. 

You fell asleep in the car, waking up when Alastor kissed your lips. You blinked slowly before smiling at him. He stroked your cheeks before going to take the luggages. You got out of the car and looked around with a big smile, you could feel the sun and hear the sounds of the waves not too far.

You watched at the little house in front of you and saw a grandma coming out with a big smile.

“ You must be Mr and Mrs Sanglar, nice to meet you, I'm Paulette.”

“ Nice to meet you,” you shook her hands,” my husband was the one with whom you discussed, I guess..?”

“ Oh, yes! The gentleman rented this lovely house for four days! You are near the beach, not too far away from the city, there are beautiful landscapes to be seen!”

You felt Alastor’s hand on your waist as he shook the old lady's hand with his charming smile.

“ Exactly, nice to meet you, I’m Alastor Sanglar. I came here two weeks ago so everything would be perfect once I brought my wife. I believe I made the right choice when choosing you, right?” asked Alastor, looking at Paulette.

“ Of course! Here the keys, put them on the mailbox when you leave! Have a lovely time here, you are such a lovely couple!” said Paulette as she hung the keys to Alastor.

You waved her goodbye as she left. You turned toward Alastor with a beaming smile.

“ You took me to the beach?” you asked with glee as he nodded. You jumped on his arms as he laughed, spinning you around. You always wanted to go to the beach, feeling the sand under your feet, watching the sun’s reflection on the waves, oh you couldn’t wait! 

Once Alastor put you down, you ran toward the house. It was cozy, not really your kind of decoration but who cared, you weren’t going to stay much inside if not for sleeping. You looked at Alastor who put your luggages on the floor, smirking at you.

“ What do you want to do first?” He crossed his arms on his chest, looking patiently at you as you thought out loud about all the possibilities. You moved your hands toward the luggages and telekinesied them toward the bedroom.

“ I want to see the city ! No, the beach!” you clapped your hands as your eyes returned to their usual color. He smiled before stretching his hand toward you which you immediately took before leaving the house.

You let Alastor guide you and you smiled even more when you saw the beach. It really was close to the house Alastor rented. You took off your shoes, Alastor already holding them for you. You touched the hot sand with your bare feet. The feeling was strange but grounding. You made a few steps before looking at Alastor with a big smile.

“ Come with me !”

You walked toward the water, and stopped in front of the ocean. You weren’t afraid of the water but knowing you didn’t know how to swim, seeing such a large amount of water kind of made you uncomfortable. 

You felt Alastor behind you, hugging you from behind. You touched his arms while staring at the water, yelping when you felt the water touching your toes.

“ Come on my love, are you still afraid of water after all we have done together ?” he mocked you as he spinned you around.

“ I’m not afraid!” 

“ And I’m not married to you. There, now we are both liars.” he smirked at you.

You stuck your tongue to him before looking at the ocean. You didn’t have a lot of good experience with water, you almost drowned two times. You were afraid of dying after finally obtaining happiness.

You flinched when you felt Alastor pinched your waist and before you could scold him he gave you a beautiful seashell. It looked like a rainbow had been painted over it. You carefully took the gift and immediately tried to look for another one, you wanted to give one to Alastor.

You both walked on the beach, taking seashells you found pretty or funny. You watched as the sun was beginning to get down on the sky, the light reflecting on Alastor. He looked divine.

You smiled softly before smirking. He was your husband but also your special person which meant you could be a brat if needed. You carefully took a fistfull of sand as he was looking at seashells. 

“ Dear husband ?”

“ Dear wife?” he said, still not looking at you.

You smirked as you walked toward him. You saw his shadow looking at you, tilting his head. You made a sign for him to stay silent. You saw it grinning before throwing the sand at Alastor who took a step back.

“ Oh, are we already playing?” he said as he slowly lifted his head, looking at you.

“ Don’t we always?” you grinned before taking off. You laughed as you heard him running after you. It was a little difficult as you weren’t used to running on sand but a few seconds after you screamed as Alastor tackled you on the floor. You laughed as he tickled you with a mocking smile. “ It’s because you forget rule number one!” you shouted as you trashed underneath him.

“ Well, it seems like you forgot rule number two.” He kissed your forehead before standing up. You caught your breath as he tried to clean himself from the sand. You looked on the side, as you felt water shyly touching you with its waves.  You stood up and smiled when Alastor kissed your hand before walking back to the old lady’s home. 

“ What should I make ?”

“ You don’t touch anything, darling. Let me handle it.” He said once you entered your rented home. “ Go take a shower, you have sand all over you.”

“ Whose fault is that?” you smirked as he tilted his head, innocently. You went to take a shower and came back in the kitchen when you smelt the delicious scent. You looked as Alastor chopped down the meat with deadly precision.  You decided you wanted to tease him, today. 

You held your hand toward the knife and smirked when you saw the knife moving off Alastor’s hands, rushing toward you. Alastor turned toward you, with an annoyed smirk when he saw you.

“ I’m trying to cook, dear.”

“ I don’t see what is stopping you.” you smiled sweetly at him. He walked toward you, sliding his hand on your shoulder until he touched your hand where you were holding the knife.

“ We both know we like it more when I’m the one with the knife, right?” he smirked when he leaned toward you, taking the knife from your hand. You bit your lips as you remembered when Alastor cut you when you were in your, now soon to be, home. You let a shaky breath as you saw his pupils dilated, staring at you. “ Right?”

“ Right.”

“ Good.” he said before going back to his cooking with a satisfied smile. You pouted before turning on the radio to have music in the background. You sway to the music, singing when you know the lyrics. You approached Alastor, your hand behind your back.

“ I want to help…”

“ Well… Can you dress the table?” he pointed toward a cupboard that was too high for you to get. “ The plates are there,” he said with a smirk.

You gave him a smirk as you easily opened the cupboard with your telekinesis but frowned when you saw Alastor’s shadow trying to keep the plates inside the cupboard.

“ Come on now, bad boy, let go !” you said as you force on your power, the shadow mocking you as he kept the plates in its grapes. You heard Alastor chuckling which made you even more agitated to have those damn plates.

“ Having some trouble, darling?” he sneered at you.

“ No!” You could feel power getting stronger in your eyes but then the shadow smirked at you before letting the plate go. You gasped before crouching, avoiding the plate that flew toward you. You bit your lips as you heard the crash against the wall behind you. You lifted your head toward Alastor who was trying to suppress his laughter.

“ Well?”

You turned around and winced when you saw the plates in pieces on the floor. You pouted as Alastor took the pieces in his hands, laughing  . You stuck your tongue at the shadow which was pointing at you while laughing. You turned toward Alastor when you heard him wince and looked at the cut he made because of the broken plates.

“ Do we have bandages ?” you asked as you took his finger to see the blood pouring out the cut. It seemed like a deep cut…

“ No need, darling. It’s going to stop soon.” he smiled at you, ready to move on.

You didn’t know what happened but you licked the wounds.

You licked his blood.

You closed your eyes as your tongue moved around the cut, collecting his blood and only stopping when you couldn’t feel the cut anymore. You opened your eyes, feeling strangely aroused before looking at Alastor who was staring at you with red eyes.

Your eyes widened, taking a couple steps back before being tugged back against him.

“, I’m sorry ! I didn’t–!”

“ Well done, my love, you healed me.”

You looked at his finger and freezed when you saw his hand was as good as new. You winced when you felt a little pain on your finger and looked at your hand. Alastor and you looked as you saw your finger being cut, just like Alastor a moment before, without any weapon around. 

“ I see… You can heal me because you took the injury yourself.” he mumbled, not seeming happy with the news.

You stared at the cut and a few seconds after, the cut disappeared. You looked at Alastor with a smile.

“ I think the injury stayed on me the same time it has stayed on you. Which means, if you ever have a serious injury, I need to heal you as quickly as possible, if I don’t want to keep the injury for too long.” 

You tried to find Alastor’s eyes, he seemed to be in deep thoughts. You knew he hated the thought of you being hurt, but if you decided to have this power, it was to be useful, to be there when needed. You would still use this power, he couldn’t control you on that.

“ I see… Well, I just have to not get injured, right?” he smirked at you as he kissed the place where was the cut moment before. “ You are pretty in purple, but I like them better in red.”

You tried to find a mirror and once you did you find that your eyes had a purple hue. You did know that Baron Samedi 's colors  were black, red and purple, you didn't expect your eyes to change color. Well, it did happen in the basement…

“ Well, darling, would you please set the table?” you rolled your eyes at Alastor's cunning voice.

You ate as you both talked about everything that would pass through your head. You were talking about your new home, how you should decorate it, how were you going to go to town if Alastor was already out?

You jerked your head up when you remembered something.

“John came to our wedding.”

“ I saw. What did he want?” he said as he bit into the meat.

“ He gave me a letter.. Wait, it should be in my bag.” You stood up and walked toward the bedroom before going back to your husband with the letter. “ He said it wasn’t from him but from his parents. We used to be good friends and they loved me. I'm a little touched that they thought about me on my wedding day…” 

You sat on Alastor’s laps and opened the letter. Your eyes widened when you saw what was inside. You knew the family Felleur was healthy but you didn’t expect them to give you 1,000 dollars!

You showed Alastor who frowned when he saw it.

“ Oh my god, Alastor…!” you gleed as he took the money from you as you jumped off his laps. “ Isn’t it amazing? After all he puts us through!” you screamed in joy, jumping in the kitchen.

“ Mhn.. Well, if it was from John himself, I wouldn’t take it. But if it is from his parents and they cared for you, who am I to refuse it.” he smirked as he put back the money in the letter and gave it back to you.

You smiled happily and looked at the clock. It was almost nine.. You turned toward Alastor who was finishing his plate.

“ Let’s take a walk.” he chuckled at your words.

“ Going outside, at night, in an unknown town? Are you looking for trouble?”

“ Aren’t we the trouble?” you smirked at him.

He groaned as he tugged you toward him and kissed you feverishly, making your legs shaking. He let you go before standing up.

“ Put on your shoes, love, we are going for a walk.”

You smiled as you put your shoes on after clearing the table. You went out with Alastor, holding upon his arm. You decided to follow a trail that seemed to go away from the city, feeling adventurous, you begged Alastor to follow it.

He sighed but accepted your supplications. You smiled as you walked on the trail that was made of sand. You could still hear the waves so the ocean shouldn’t be far off. The trail began to be a slope. Once you reached the top you looked down the hills and saw the ocean, you weren’t too high but you still gulped.  You looked at the scenery that was beautiful, the stars were reflected on the water, making it seem magical.

“ Alastor–” You turned before flinching when you saw Alastor jump off the hills, falling into the water. You looked as he threw his head backward, getting rid of the water inside his ears. “ Are you crazy?” you shouted at him which made him laugh. “ Stay here, I’m going to take the trail to–”

“ Jump!”

You froze when you heard his words. You felt like you were taken back when you were eight years old and Alastor has asked you to jump off the swing. 

“ Alastor…” you bit your lips, that time when he asked you to jump, it was on the floor, not in the deep ocean, you could see Alastor wasn’t touching the bottom of the water which meant it was already too deep for you.

“ I’ll catch you.” He said it loud enough for you to hear.

You looked at him as he was watching you with a boyish smile. You already fell for Alastor on time, the second time should be easier, right? You took a deep breath and then.

You jumped.

You could feel excitement in your belly, the air slapping your face as the water was coming closer and closer. You wanted to close your eyes all the way down but they were focused on Alastor but once you saw the water too close you shut your eyes.

You felt Alastor’s arms as you hitted the water. You wrapped your arms around his body before he swam the both of you toward the surface. You gasped for air and looked around before laughing as you stared at your husband with a wide laugh.

“Wow! Did you see that Alastor ! I did it ! Haha ! That was super amazing !” You looked at him with a wide smile, you did it! You actually jumped! 

You looked as Alastor hand cupped your face before kissing you. You closed your eyes as you kissed him back. You were in heaven. You were kissing him, with everything you have. You wrapped your legs around his waist as your breath began to get heavier. You leaned back with a shy smile.

He was looking at you with so much emotion, it was almost driving you crazy.

“ Let’s go back..”

—----

Next morning, you woke up in Alastor’s arms, both of you naked as the day you were born. You looked at Alastor’s sleeping face which was rare to come by. You kissed his lips before leaving the bed, taking a nightdress and began to prepare his black coffee. You flushed when you saw your reflection in the mirror.

Your neck, chest and thighs were bruised with bite marks and hickeys. You shook your head and decided to make waffles. You smiled when you heard Alastor leaving the bedroom, his footsteps coming toward you. You sighed in bliss when you felt him hug you from behind, he seemed still half asleep.

“ Why are you here…?” he asked in his deep voice.

“ I wanted to prepare breakfast.” You kissed his cheek and showed him what you prepared. He didn’t look, he just hugged you tighter. After a few minutes, he kissed your neck before leaning back and sat on the chair. You brought his coffee, looking at his face.

“ Are you alright, Alastor?”

“ I’m doing great, I was just thinking of the ritual, no worry.” he drank his coffee as you sat next to him. “ Why not go shopping today?” he asked you which you reply with a happy grin. 

You quickly took a shower and dressed up in a summer dress. You met Alastor outside the house and went to the city by foot, it was a 30 minute walk. You looked at the shop and smiled when you saw a sofa.

“ We should take it to our house, for the living room!”

“ My love, the house is big, remember? Bigger than the house we are staying at, right now. This seems a little small for the living room.”

“ What about the room that could be your office? If I remember there are three bedroom, one office room, the living room with a kitchen–”

“ Darling, I wouldn’t want this color in my office.” he grimaced as he looked at you.

“ But in the living room, yes?” you smirked.

“ … Please, no.”

You laughed as you kept walking, looking for things for your new home or for yourself. You find new clothes, a new hat for Alastor and some souvenirs for your family and friends. You ate lunch in a small restaurant that was delicious! Alastor didn’t like it much but he smiled when you said you could help him finish.

You walked back home, still full of energy! You looked at the full moon as Alastor was taking a shower. He came back to you, cleaning his glasses with a tissue.

“ Are you ready, my love?”

“ Mhn?”

“ Well, to bond yourself to me.” 

“ I have everything we need.” He said with a confident smile. He walked back toward you with a blade. “ First, I need a place to mark you, if you don’t mind, dearest, I’ll choose your heart. I already carved an ‘A’ here, but you know I’m greedy. I’ll place my runes here��”

You stood up so fast you almost lost your balance. Was today the day? You nodded and followed Alastor in the bedroom. You looked around when you saw the symbols written on papers with ink.

“ You have a rune for yourself ?” you asked him, curiously.

“ I created one, yes.” He tilted his head as you took off your dress, baring yourself at him. He walked toward you and cut you between your breasts. All you felt was pleasure, you held on his shoulder as you sighed in bliss. You could feel something sipping inside of you, it felt oh so pleasant.

“ Every time your heart beats, it is for me. This life is mine… “ He whispered against your skin. “Now,dear, unfortunately, you can’t carve  rune but you still have energy. Where do you want to place yourself on me.” he smiled at you with a teasing expression, watching you as you put your night dress on. “ My heart already belongs to you–”

“ Your forehead.”

“ Pardon?”

“ Well, we both know you always stay inside your mind for hours sometimes. I want to be the one who owns every single one of your thoughts.” You said confidently even if you could feel warmth on your cheeks. You advanced toward him, feeling power inside you. You kissed his forehead, closing your eyes. “ This twisted brain of yours will never work if my heart isn’t beating for you.”

You took a step back, looking at your husband who was staring at you with red eyes.

“ This is really cute, I don’t remember the last time I performed this curse!” you looked at Baron Samedi who was smoking his cigar.

“ Let’s finish this.” you heard Papa Legba. “ You need something that would be the material bond in the human world. “

You looked as Alastor took something of his luggages.

“ Eamon!” you shouted in surprise. 

“ Of course, dear. What is better to represent our bond than our fawn?”

“ He is a deer!”

“ Fawn. Now! Let’s begin.” he placed Eamon on the floor between the two of you. 

You felt Papa Legba energy coming inside you, you could hear your bone moves as he took place inside you. You watched as Kalfu slid inside Alastor easily. Your husband was now smiling in a humanly impossible way, his teeth yellowish. You watched as your body cut itself, letting the blood dripping on Eamon, Alastor doing the same thing.

Your mouth opened and you began to speak a language you didn't know, Alastor doing the same. You could see the symbols Alastor has written, moving in the air. They were glowing in a green light as the wind was moving the paper around you. 

You watched as Eamon began to light up in a reddish, greenish light. You hoped your deer wasn’t going to be destroyed…

You then felt a horrible pain in your chest. It was like something sharp was stabbing you, the blade always going deeper and deeper. You couldn’t move your body but the pain was real. You looked toward Alastor who seemed in pain as well. You could feel every beating of your heart, and each beating was sending knives in your veins. What was happening ? Were you dying ? 

You watched as Baron Samedi came toward you and wrote something in front of you which you didn't understand. He did the same with Alastor before stepping back.

You fell on the floor once you felt Legba leaving your body. You touched your chest, the pain was slowly going away but it hurted so much you were scared that if you moved it would come back.

“ Well, the curse is done. Congratulations, Mr and Mrs Sanglar, you are now bound forever and nothing can separate you, in the human and in the spirits realm.” you heard Kalfu smirked, clapping sarcastically. “ I can’t wait to see what you are going to be able to do, please, do not disappoint us.” Kalfu smirked before vanishing.

“ Both of you, be careful. With this, little lady, Alastor, see you again.” you heard Legba said before vanishing.

“ Please, enjoy what this bound has to offer!” laughed Baron Samedi before vanishing as well.

You lifted up your head and saw Alastor holding his head, his hands gripping his hair almost strong enough to tear it off. You crawled toward him and took one of his hands. You felt so tired you couldn’t talk but you needed him to know you were here for him. You were going to make it …

“ I know Darling, I just need a moment. My head is killing me.”

But this time, you were sure you didn’t speak… Well, you could try, it could be funny at best.

You blinked and touched your lips. Did you speak out loud? Sometimes you weren’t aware of it. You would just be thinking out loud and Alastor would tell you he could hear you which would make you blush.

Alastor, can you hear me?

“ Of course, you are next to me, but please, love, don’t speak so loud. My head hurts.” He groaned as he kept his hand on his head, gripping his hair while you were dumbfounded. No way… No fucking way ! You forced him to look at you, making him groan once more. “ What? Are you not okay?”

You kept his stare on you as you thought to him.

You tell me. I’m freaking out right now because I think you are hearing my thoughts.

You watched as his eyes widened, his eyes moving from your lips to your eyes. Then, while you were trying to not freak out, something almost made you scream.

“ Alastor…”

You heard Alastor voice in your head saying ‘ No fucking way..’. You stood up as you stared at him, he stood up at the same time as you.

His smile widened before he rushed toward you and hugged you. He spun you around, laughing happily. You stared at him, lost but happy. He put you down and took Eamon with a smirk.

“ I don’t believe it. There aren’t a lot of archives about this spell but I sure didn’t know we could share our thoughts that way.” He put Eamon with care on the bed. “ My love, now Eamon is the material bound between us, nothing must happen to him, it could weaken what is linking us.” 

He laughed like a mad man, that should scare you but you just smiled softly, looking fondly at your husband.

“ Oh my love, curse of my sanity, I can’t wait to kill while hearing all of your thoughts!” he laughed, bending his body backwards, his hand hiding his eyes. “ I have a list of new victims, it only needs us to erase them from earth!”

You didn’t think about it, but if it meant hearing Alastor thoughts when he was killing or making love to you.. You flushed as bloodlust and lust took over you. You began to giggle as your husband kept laughing.

What a good day !

You walked toward him as he lifted you up in the air. You laughed as you both danced in the small bedroom while laughing. You stopped when you saw something.

“ Alastor…”

“ Yes?”

“ My shadow…”

He turned his head and both of you watched as your shadow was waving at you with a hideous smile, Alastor’s shadow next to it.  You tilted your head and the shadow did the same. You smiled.

Did the bond make you ‘steal’ one of Alastor's powers? You looked at your shadow, who was looking at Eamon with curiosity.  Alastor’s shadow was following yours, tugging at your shadow's hair before rushing somewhere else while your shadow was running after him.

“ Well… If you want it to go back to your shadow, just think about it.” Said Alastor, his red eyes shining with a teasing smile.

You did what he said and your shadow came back to you without a fuss, going back to normal. You looked at Alastor, your eyes as red as him. He tugged you toward him, the both of you smiling widely at each other.

“Oh this will be fun.”

Tag List: @lukneetoonz @martinys-world @littlepoetnova @sirens-and-moonflowers @eris-norwega @tiredflame132 @mo-0-o @vvollerie @sodavizz @boogiemansbitch @tessemerick @slytherin4ever @kammsinn @alastorssimp @t0xic1vi @diamond-almond @fangirlbitch02 @saccharine-nectarine @thenorthnightingale @bibliophile-yomna @itzjustj-1000 @mothraantics @yourdoorisunlocked @phamtasic @karmakillz @holographicage @sarcastic-sourwolf @akuraluna2468 @everwolf-20 @thesunandmoons-blog @songbrita @noraunor @fandomsbookclub @hokkaido97 @catticora @gasiacos

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[brucewaynehater101]

I have a spooky Tim au that I think you would like.

Tim is not human and has never been. He knows this. His "parents" know this. The rouges know this. However, none of the Bats but one know this. When around the Bats, Tim looks like a Normal Human. His skin is pale but does look like flesh and his eyes are weirdly pale but they still look like eyes. His hair has a weird texture but its prob just his shampoo, so surely the slightly off texture in how his skin feels is just his lotion, right? His teeth are a bit sharp but still human teeth and his movements a bit odd, but what Bat doesn't move strangely?

However when they aren't around, it is a totally different story. His skin changes to look like porcelain and his eyes are so very clearly made of painted glass. His hair is made of string and twine died black and when its fist or foot lands a blow it feels like being hit by a sand bag and not flesh and bone. His teeth are made of shards of broken glass and his movements are far to Jerry yet smooth, like a puppet on strings that glides through the air in a horrible mimicry of walking. This Thing that wears the Robin Suit is Not a human, as long as it isn't around Batman or Nightwing. When either are there, The Rouges can see the shift. The way it suddenly looks so *human*. But once Batman leaves it shifts back into being a *thing*.

Tim is only a Thing when he is either scaring the rouges or Truly Comfortable. Young Justice knows that Tim is not a human and he doesn't hide it from them. There is never any fight about his civilian identity because he freely tells them, "I am a Thing made from Glass and Sand and Fabric and Magic. He is not a Person nor has he ever Been A Person. He is not some poor sap who was transformed into a Thing, he is a Thing that was created and then given life with Magic.

As for how Jack and Janet acquired a Thing like Tim, well. They're archeologists. They dug up an old tomb, found a coffin that was chained closed and bolted to the ground and like every White Person In A Horror Movie, they opened it without a second thought. Inside they found an ancient, cursed doll. It came to life when Janet cut herself trying to clean off one of its broken glass eyes to get a better look and the blood fell on it. The pair then decided this was a lot easier than child birth and kept the cursed doll, naming it Tim.

My gods. I love the ending of this cause it gives off the same vibes as "humans will adopt anything" tropes in space travel fiction.

I have one caveat with the Bats not knowing. I hc that Cass knows. Tim's body language is too strange for her not to notice something.

Everything else? Beautiful. It would be hilarious if people keep trying to tell the Bats. Here's a possible scene:

Goon: *points finger at Tim* "That thing beside you isn't human!"

Tim: *fakes having his shoulders drop as he turns slightly away in dejection*

Dick: *absolute fury as he beats up the goon*

Tim: *decides not to get revenge after seeing what Nightwing does to the person*

or

Rogue: "I'm telling ya, whatever he is got string hair, porcelain skin, and doll like movements to him."

Batman: *hums, takes them out, proceeds to Batcave*

Tim: "What's up, B?"

Bruce: "[] said that you look different when we're not around you."

Tim: *tilts his head* "I mean, I like playing up the rumors that the Bats are cryptids, demons from hell, spirits, or whatever when I can. I add effects to my costume to increase the spook factor."

Bruce: *nods and turns away to end the conversation for now*

Tim: *makes plots to ruin that rogue's life for a bit as revenge and a message*

I'm curious how wounds and scars look on Tim's porcelain skin. How does he heal? Does he even have a spleen?

I'm also down for two avenues:

Jason doesn't know like the rest of the Bats. After they start to become close to each other, Jason retaliates against folk who try to demean Tim. He tries to hide the comments from Tim until he learns that the teen finds it funny and ramps up the rumors on purpose. Then he switches to pulling pranks on people with Tim to create more wild theories and gossip.

Jason finds out at TT, and Tim ensures no one actually believes Jason. Perhaps he even starts the notion that Jason was affected by the Pit. It drives Jason bonkers that no one is trusting him or accepting his words for what they are.

#dc comics #tim drake #dc universe #thank you for the ask!!!! #dc au #dick grayson #bruce wayne #jason todd

[gonzo-rella]

Together in the Shadows | Eloise Bridgerton

MASTERLIST | AO3 | KO-FI

NOTE: I prefer to write the reader as gender neutral, but as Bridgerton is set in a very gendered time, that poses a challenge. The reader in this is implied to be, societally, a woman; they are alone with Eloise without worrying about scandal, so this implies that the reader is perceived as a woman. However, I've deliberately been as vague as possible about the reader character to make them as close to gender neutral as possible and haven't explicitly referred to them as being a woman so that some nonbinary and trans folks like myself can feel comfortable reading this fic.

Relationship(s): Eloise Bridgerton x fem-coded/possibly gn!reader (romantic)

Summary: Your sister's last-minute ball is disastrous, but at least it allows you to spend some time alone with Eloise.

Warnings: Nothing beyond kissing. (Let me know if I need to add any)

Word count: 0.8k

(A/N: I'm so in love with Eloise Bridgerton. I want to be in a secret situationship with her, so here's my attempt at exploring that. Also, I haven't actually written a lot of fics that include kissing, so I'm glad I got some practise in writing something I normally don't write. A lot of my original projects are romcoms (including a Regency-inspired duology and a zombie apocalypse story) so it'd help me out a great deal if you let me know what you think of how I did writing the romance in this!)

“Is it not a bit chilly to be out here, Miss Bridgerton?” A grin tugged at Eloise’s lips. She stopped dead in her tracks and peered over her shoulder, not quite looking at you. For a moment, she listened to your footsteps as you paced towards her, though the rustling of grass under your shoes was barely audible over the piercing noise of the string quartet that carried itself through the windows and doors. She scrunched up her nose at the unfortunate sound.

“Perhaps. But, I am afraid I may spiral into a state of madness should I stand in that room for a second longer. I can, however, withstand this cold and my mama’s scolding of me for my absence.”

You wore a mocking frown as you finally reached her side. You were both illuminated by the golden light that shone through the windows and the pale glow of the moon. She turned her head to look at you. For a moment, you forgot to breathe. She was naturally beautiful, but seeing her in this lighting… she looked ethereal. It took you a moment to compose yourself enough to form coherent thought and speech. You weren’t sure that she had noticed the momentary falter.

“In my dear sister’s defence, she poured her whole soul into planning this spectacular event this afternoon.”

Eloise snorted.

“It certainly is a spectacle. I shudder to think what Lady Whistledown will write about it.”

You chuckled and linked arms with her. Briefly averting your gaze, you looked through the window at the attendees who were pretending to enjoy themselves or whispering to each other, presumably uttering some cruel things about this awful ball. Meanwhile, Eloise’s eyes flickered down to where the pair of you made contact, then back up to your face. The skin of your arm brushed against hers, and the gentle friction generated a light tingling sensation that flooded her whole body. She almost couldn’t keep herself upright, and she tightened her grip on your arm to steady herself. Despite the cold night air, her cheeks burned. With her free hand, she reached up to feel the warming flesh of her face. Heat seeped through the fabric of her gloves to her fingertips. The second you returned your attention to her, she quickly lowered her arm, embarrassed.

“However scathing it may be, I assure you that my sister will be delighted to have even been acknowledged,” you said. You paused before continuing. “Given how dreadful everything is in there, I shouldn’t think our absence will be noticed. Would you like to wander the grounds so we do not freeze to death?”

A breathy laugh escaped her lips. 

“Of course. Might we wander far enough that we can escape that cacophony? Somewhere that will afford us some… privacy, perhaps?”

You grinned back at her.

“Certainly, Miss Bridgerton. I know the perfect place for us to enjoy one another’s company.”

Stealing a final glance behind you, you led her to a secluded part of the vast garden, where you would both be hidden by grand hedges. You let go of her arm and turned to face her.

“Is this to your liking?”

A smirk tugged at her lips.

“Anywhere that you are is to my liking.”

“That is so very sweet, I can almost forgive how nauseatingly trite it is.”

She rested her hand on her chest in mock-offence.

“Oh, how you wound me.”

Of course, she can’t have been that wounded, given her grin.

“Would you feel better if I offered you a kiss?”

She scoffed and rolled her eyes.

“And, that is not trite?”

You shrugged innocently, unable to suppress a smile.

“I could not think of a more creative way to ask if I could kiss you. I know how you value originality.”

Without hesitation, Eloise placed her hands on your cheeks, and brought your face close to hers. Her breath fanned your skin. Through half-lidded eyes, you watched her gaze flicker to your lips.

“Being direct would have done,” she muttered. “After all, I have been waiting all night for this.”

“Then, why wait a second longer?”

Eloise let out a low chuckle, then closed the gap between you entirely. The kiss was gentle at first, but within seconds her hunger for you became clear. One hand moved to the back of your head to bring you in closer. The other remained planted firmly on the side of your face, her gloved thumb grazing your cheekbone. The motion was so light that you gasped quietly into the kiss, to Eloise’s delight. Her lips moved against yours with fervour, as though she was determined to take in and savour as much of your taste as possible. You rested your palms on her shoulders, and as your hand drifted up her neck you could feel her racing pulse. Then, your fingers became entangled in her hair. You tugged on it softly, and a quiet hum escaped her lips.

Reluctantly, she pulled away, but she only managed to get her face an inch away from yours. She laughed quietly, while you couldn’t help but grin.

“Was that to your liking, Miss Bridgerton?”

“You are always to my liking.”

#eloise bridgerton #eloise bridgerton x reader #bridgerton #bridgerton x reader #x reader #x gn!reader #x gn reader #x gender neutral reader #x gender neutral!reader

[justagalwhowrites]

Yearling - Ch. 37: Pieces

Mitchum sends you to where he wants you as Joel questions Cody. A continuation of Yearling ch. 1-36 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Canon-typical violence and several steps beyond that. Fairly graphic torture (not of reader.) Mention of past sexual assault, not described. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only 

Length: 6k

A/N: As with the last chapter, I want to state, real quick, that Bambi is NOT going to be sexually assaulted again. This is a highly triggering subject and, given the situation she's in, I understand if folks are bracing for it. That's not going to happen. The threat of it is there but it's not going to happen.

We are into the final arc of Yearling and we are going to see some TLOU 2 OVERLAP again. There isn't any this chapter but there will be in this arc and here's how: a character from that game will be mentioned as will the spoiler-y incident from a few chapters ago. What happens plot wise in this arc is completely separate from the game and entirely original content BUT there is that character overlap and more specific mentions of the incident and the motives behind it. This character returns THIS CHAPTER. If you're trying to go in blind to season 2, it might be wise to step back. Feel free to send me a DM, I'm happy to answer any and all questions!

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter

They were talking about you like you weren’t there. 

You’d been used to that once but it had been a long time since you’d been just a thing, separate from that life about as long as you’d suffered it. You had forgotten just how much you hated this part of being a prisoner. You’d internalized so many of the more acute horrors that the smaller things had slipped away, but the change from human being to livestock was sharp. You didn’t have much in you to fight against anything - still barely able to stand - but it seemed what little there was faded quickly just listening to the men talk about you as though you were some unruly animal. 

“Take her back to the main camp,” Mitchum said, taking your arm and turning you around so he could look you over. “She’s good on a horse, don’t let her near the reins. Don’t be stupid enough to think this one won’t take off just because she’s down some fingers, she’s a feral thing. That fucking moron… Get her there and don’t fuck her, understand? She’s mine and I gotta make sure she’s broken in right. Been wild too long, gonna have to start from scratch.” 

He took your chin in his hand, forcing your eyes to meet his own. 

“Gonna bring you back where you belong,” he said. “I tamed you once, I can do it again.” 

You didn’t say anything, all your energy going in to keeping yourself standing. You tried to think about something, anything, beyond how close Mitchum was to you again, every alarm bell your body had ringing. Where his fingers were on you burned and your heart raced, the blood loss and fear making your head spin.

The only thing that could be worse than being this close to him again was Savvy and Ellie being this close to him. The thought that you’d saved them from this was a small comfort. You hoped they made it back. You had to believe they made it. You weren’t sure you’d have the strength to keep going otherwise. They made it, they made it back to Jackson, they were safe there. 

But the men were talking about Jackson, too. Like it was something they could take. What’s worse, they sounded confident that they could do it. It was something that had seemed impossible when you were within the walls, everything so strong and permanent. How could the will of men destroy something like that? But now that you were here, back in the grip of what terrified you, it didn’t seem so impossible anymore. Jackson was just people, too. Good people, strong people who had decided to survive and work and love alongside each other but people all the same. It doesn’t take some act of God to destroy a person, just one other, determined person can do the job. 

You couldn’t handle considering that, not when the only things in the world that mattered were dependent on Jackson to be safe. You had to believe that Jackson could withstand whatever came its way, that Ellie and Savvy had made it back, that they would be safe within its walls and would never have to face men like Mitchum and Cody again. They made it, they made it back to Jackson and they were safe. The whole city was.

You thought it over and over again in your head, a mantra of sorts, as they brought you to a horse and forced you on its back. You were too out of it to grab the reins immediately, a man mounting up in front of you before you could think twice about taking control of the animal. 

“Better not try anything back there if you know what’s good for you,” the man snapped before making the horse move. You just tried to stay upright and tried to think of ways to escape once you were strong enough to run. You had to resist the urge to try now, every nerve in your body on fire and driving you to run or fight. But you couldn’t. You’d never survive a fight right now and you’d only be able to walk a mile - maybe two - before you’d collapse and then they’d have you again. You needed to save your strength or you’d never get out. 

You tried to remind yourself that you’d done all this before. You’d survived what they did to you and made it out. You’d lived and built a life and found your daughter and protected what mattered. You’d done it once, you could do it again. You just had to survive. 

You focused on the people that you wanted to survive for - Savvy and Ellie and Joel and Maria and Tommy and William and Julie and and and - and tried to settle into the sway of the horse as it walked.

Time was strange like this, pulling and warping. It seemed like it was dark longer than it should have been when the sun started to rise and then, when the men stopped for a break, the sun seemed higher than it should have been. You drank water when it was offered. You watched for a chance to steal a horse - the only way you thought you’d be able to make it far in that moment - but didn’t get one. 

The light hadn’t yet taken on the soft, hazy quality of evening when you reached where you were headed. It was an unfamiliar place, a small subdivision - maybe two dozen houses total - with mountains at its back. There was a guarded perimeter, men in cowboy hats who gave the men you were with a nod as they rode in. 

They brought you to the center of the neighborhood, to a house that was small but looked to be in good repair, two men stationed outside. 

“Down,” the man you were riding with ordered. You obeyed, sliding off the horse and stumbling, head spinning. He dismounted more smoothly before grabbing you by the collar of your shirt - Joel’s shirt - and hauled you for the door, one of the guards meeting him there. He took a padlock off the front door before opening it and shoving you inside, past a small living room with a sunken sofa and a kitchen with counters covered in a thick layer of dust. He forced you down a hall to a bedroom. You were almost positive it had been a little girl’s room once but it had been stripped of all forms of childish comfort. There were two twin sized mattresses on the floor, tucked into corners on opposite pink walls. There had been carpet once, you were sure, but it had been pulled up, just the plywood below remaining. There was a bucket at the foot of each bed and some drywall had been pulled away near each bed, exposing the frame of the walls, chains wrapped around a stud near either bed. 

“On the bed,” the man ordered, shoving you toward it and making you stumble. You more fell onto the mattress than sat on it but it didn’t seem to make a difference. He approached you and you went to kick him, not about to let him just take what he wanted without a fight, but he caught your boot, giving you a sharp shake when he did. “Just making sure you don’t run. Sit still or this will hurt a lot more than it needs to.” 

He pulled your boot off before you had a chance to respond and tossed it near the door before picking up the chain. It was thick and heavy, no cuff on the end. He wrapped it around your ankle, tight enough that it cut into your flesh a little, and put a padlock through the loops to hold it in place. He gave it a testing pull and it didn’t budge. He nodded. 

“Recommend you rest while you can,” he said, dropping your leg. “Mitchum’s back in a day or two, don’t imagine you’ll have much while he’s here.” 

He turned to leave and you looked to the other mattress. There was a smear of blood near the chain that was still bright red, like it hadn’t dried yet. There was someone else who had been here, someone recently. The door closed and locked and you stretched out on the bed, trying to force your body and mind to still enough that you could rest. 

It didn’t work very well. You faded in and out of consciousness for a while - you weren’t entirely sure how long but you were fairly certain night had fallen. The window in the room was covered with yellowed newspaper but you were pretty sure you’d seen light coming through it earlier in the day. It was dark now. 

It took you a moment to realize what had pulled you back to consciousness. There was a scuffle outside your door, the sound of someone being wrestled inside. You shot up, scrambling to find something you might be able to use as a weapon but came up empty, the room stripped of anything that could be a tool and your mind still working slowly. You were still down a lot of blood. 

The door opened and you braced yourself to claw and bite but the man there paid you no mind. Instead, he shoved a tall, broad young woman in, one with a blonde fishtail braid that hung down her back. Something inside you twinged at the sight of her, a distant alarm bell ringing. She was familiar, you couldn’t see her face but you knew her. You could feel it.

The man forced her onto the opposite mattress and all but threw the chain around her ankle before locking it into place. 

“If you’re fuckin’ smart, you’ll behave yourself,” the man backed away from her, panting for breath with a cut on his cheek. “If you weren’t one of Mitchum’s favorite toys, I’d kill you myself.” 

“Fuck you,” she spat, lifting her head from the mattress, her teeth bared in a snarl. Your breath caught, the fingers from your intact hand groping for the chain attached to your ankle, your best hope for a weapon. 

You did know this woman - almost more of a girl in spite of her size and strength, she couldn’t be much older than Ellie and definitely young enough to be your daughter. You didn’t know her name or where she was from or why she had tried to murder your husband but you knew her, knew how she looked when she was filled with rage and desperate to kill a man. Knew how she looked as she beat Joel until he was bloody and half dead. Your grip on the chain tightened. 

The man left and you weren’t sure if the two of them had said anything else, the high pitched whine that had taken over your ears only just beginning to fade. 

She seemed to notice you then, straining to sit up, her eyes wide at first but narrowing when she reached your face. 

She recognized you, too. 

“You,” she was still panting for breath, leaning against the wall at her back, sneering at you. Watching you. “I should have known they’d find some other fucking way to torture me.” 

You watched her back, ready to defend yourself in case she made a move. 

“I could have said the same thing about you.” 

***

Joel wasn’t aware of much. 

There were gunshots but they were of little consequence. The screams didn’t register, either. Neither did the sweat on his neck or the pain in his back or the pull in his leg that had been there ever since he was shot by the girl who wanted him dead. 

He could feel your blood on his hands, though, and the feel of your fingers in his pocket and hear the thud of his heart and he could see. He could see Cody on his horse but he could see how you’d been afraid of him, too. That day in the stable when Joel held you and you were so scared you could barely stay standing. He could see how it would have happened, how this man would have cut away pieces of you. How scared you would have been, how you would have fought anyway, how you would have screamed. 

All Joel really knew in that moment was that he needed to hurt this man. He needed to take every ounce of pain from his body until there was nothing else left inside of him and he needed him to know, as he died, that he was dying for you. 

Cody tried to dodge Joel as he threw himself at him, the horse stutter stepping away as Cody tried to pull it back while also grabbing his gun. But he wasn’t fast enough, Joel’s hands closing around the edges of the man’s jacket as he yanked him to the ground, Cody’s gun flying into the trees. 

But Cody was not a small man and his thrashing weight threw Joel off balance, the two of them sprawling to the forest floor. Cody was younger and more agile and got to his feet first, pulling his knife free from his belt, lunging for Joel. But Joel was ready for him, kicking him in the gut so hard that it knocked the wind out of him and sent him stumbling back. He got to his feet, too, Cody leaning against a tree, knife out as he caught his breath. 

“You’re not gonna get her back,” he panted, a sneer on his face as he watched Joel. “She’s with him now and he’s not gonna let her go so easy this time. And when he’s done with her, don’t think you’ll even want her back.” 

There was commotion at Joel’s back but it barely registered. 

“I should have fucking killed you when I had the chance,” Joel said, watching him closely. “She was too good to you. She’s always been better than anyone left fuckin’ deserved, least of all you.” 

“And she should’ve known what I gave her when I let her go,” he said, standing up a little straighter now, breath caught. “Instead of being an ungrateful cunt.” 

Joel roared and threw himself at Cody, the other man striking out at him with his knife. He nicked Joel’s shoulder with the blade but he barely noticed it, the blow not really hurting so much as being filed away as information, things he would need to contend with at some point when Cody’s blood was cold on the ground. 

Joel threw a punch, catching Cody on the jaw and he stumbled for a moment before lunging at Joel, striking out with the knife again but falling short and following up with a clumsy fist after. Joel caught his hand and twisted it, the other man giving a sharp yelp. Joel liked the sound, the evidence of his pain soothing the gnawing desperation inside him. 

But his satisfaction was short lived, the knife slamming into Joel’s shoulder making him seize up for a moment. He was aware that it should hurt, that there was metal inside him now that didn’t belong, but all it did was bring everything into sharper focus. This knife was probably the one that had drawn your blood, too. It seemed right that he should suffer it with you after he’d failed at doing what he’d vowed to do. 

The split second of the shock of the stab passed quickly and Joel drove Cody back into the tree, slamming his back into the trunk of it and knocking the air out of him, his head hitting the bark with a sickening thud. Joel didn’t relent. Instead, he punched him across the face, one arm holding the man in place as he hit him again and again. 

This satisfaction held longer. Cody’s fingers scramble and clawed at Joel, trying to find purchase somewhere they could pull him away from his singular mission but that was impossible. Joel’s physical body didn’t matter to him anymore, not without you, and every small hurt was swallowed by the drive to destroy. 

“Joel!” Tommy’s arm looped around Joel’s neck, pulling him back from Cody who slipped down the tree trunk, his hands limp on the blood coated leaves, his chest still rising and falling, eyes blinking as he stared into space. Joel strained to pull away from Tommy’s grip but his brother held him firm as he panted for breath. “Joel, you can’t kill him yet, we need information. We kept one of the others alive but we need information or we’ll never find her. He’s alive, we need him to stay a live a little longer.” 

Joel slumped forward in Tommy’s grip and his hold on him loosened, starting to feel his body again. His knuckles hurt and were slick with blood. Joel wasn’t sure how much was Cody’s and how much was his own. There was a sharp, stabbing pain in his shoulder and he reached back with his other arm, flinching as he did, before taking hold of the knife and pulling the blade free. He heard Tommy wince as he did and Joel brought the weapon around in front of him, holding it up for a moment. His blood was slick over half the blade, the edge serrated. 

“You cut off my wife’s fingers with this?” Joel panted, squatting down to be on Cody’s level, holding the knife up. His own voice sounded odd to him, so normal when everything was so wrong. 

“Wait, what?” Ellie stalked over to him and Joel glanced up at her. There was a cut on her cheek and her eyes were wide. Joel turned back to Cody and reached into his pocket, gently pulling your fingers free before setting them on Cody’s stomach. “Motherfucker!” 

Joel barely registered the sound of Tommy wrestling Ellie away, too focused on the man in front of him to worry about anything else. 

“Did you cut off my wife’s fingers with this?” Joel said again, voice flat. 

Cody struggled to swallow and Joel took hold of his jaw, yanking his head around so he was looking right at him. 

“Answer the question.” 

Cody blinked a few times before taking a shaky breath. 

“Yes.” 

There was a rattle in his voice and blood on his teeth. 

“Good.” 

Joel took the knife and thrust it into his thigh, just over his knee. Cody screamed and squirmed uselessly under him and Joel waited, keeping constant pressure down on the blade, giving him no relief. 

As he quieted - gasping for breath, eyes wide and bloodshot - Joel pulled the knife from his leg and wiped the blood on his jeans. 

“Gonna hurt you like you hurt her,” he said, picking up Cody’s hand from the ground. He started trying to pull it away, heavy breaths shifting to hyperventilation, but Joel held firm, forcing the hand down to the man’s thigh. “What, you afraid of me usin’ your knife the way you do? That it? Can’t be that bad, can it?” 

“No,” he panted. “No, please, I’ll give you whatever you want, I’ll…” 

Joel lined the blade up with the smallest knuckle on Cody’s pinky and cut through it in one devastating push, the man screaming and writhing and trying to pull his hand into his chest to comfort himself but Joel didn’t let him. 

“You’ll give me what I want?” Joel asked, putting the knife at the next joint down. “But what if what I want is my wife? What if what I want is your pain, hm? You give me that?” 

He cut again, the blade meeting more resistance this time. Joel pushed through it, the knife cutting through the denim of his jeans on the other side of his hand as he screamed again. Cody closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the tree and Joel resisted the urge to beat his face in. He had to leave him alive for a little while longer. 

And besides, he couldn’t take more pain from him if he was dead. 

“No, you don’t get to fuckin’ pass out on me,” Joel stabbed the knife through his hand, pinning it to his thigh before grabbing his hair by the fistful, bringing his head forward so it was only inches from Joel’s own. He could smell the blood on his skin, clearly see the trails of salt on his cheeks. “You get to be awake for this. Doubt you ever let her pass out, did you? Not about to do you any favors. Now, you focus on me, understand?” 

Cody managed a nod. Joel dragged the blade through is palm, between the webbing of his fingers, cutting a path through the delicate bones of his hand and the thick muscle of his thigh as Cody begged and screamed. The wound at Joel’s shoulder ached. He couldn’t bring himself to care about either thing. 

He held Cody’s hand in place again and gave him a second to quiet and catch his breath before lining the knife up at the base of his pinky. 

“Please,” he panted, eyes so desperate as they met Joel’s. “Please, I can’t…” 

“Can’t what?” Joel asked, brows raised. “Can’t survive what you did to her?” 

Joel cut, separating the bloody remains of the finger from Cody’s hand and casting it aside. Cody’s screams were growing hoarse and Joel ground his teeth. He still needed answers from him and he needed to be able to talk for that. 

He pulled the knife away, holding it firmly and watching as the other man caught his breath. 

“I can make this easier,” Joel said after a moment. “You tell me where she is? I kill you. Quick. Maybe not painless but not as bad as this. You’re not leavin’ here alive. Should have killed you in Jackson months ago. Hell, should have fucking found you years ago and killed you then but I didn’t. Not about to let you go again. But it’s up to you if how I kill you is for you or for me, if it’s fast or if it’s slow.”

“I…” the wet rattle of Cody’s breath was sharper now. “I can’t… I can’t trust you to do it quick…” 

“Yes you can,” Joel said. “You tell me where my wife is? I’m gonna go get her. Not gonna want to waste more time here with you. It’ll be quick if you just tell me.” 

Cody’s eyes searched Joel’s for a moment, like he would find some kind of answer in them. Joel didn’t need to see his reflection to know that the only thing Cody would find in his gaze was the hollow, desperate pain of your loss. There wasn’t anything else left in him to see. 

“I traded her,” he said. “To Mitchum. Met… met him about 10 miles north east of here but he won’t still be there. I don’t think he’d keep her with him - he never did before, always… always had her at his base…” 

“And where’s that,” Joel asked when he trailed off. Cody’s neck went limp and Joel grabbed his chin again, giving him a sharp shake and forcing his eyes to spring open. “Stay with me, focus right here. Where is Mitchum’s base? Where would he take her?” 

“Little spot,” he panted. “Just… a bunch of houses, don’t know if it’s got a name…” 

“Tommy!” Joel called without even glancing back at him. “Need a map.” 

It took a few seconds before Tommy appeared, handing Joel a wrinkled and worn map. 

“Point to where it is on this map,” Joel said, releasing his bloody, four fingered hand. “Your buddy over there know where it is?” Cody nodded, shaky, once. “Good. You point where it is. He’d better point to the same goddamn spot.”

He handed the map back to Tommy and kept Cody in his sights, watching as his skin grew pale and his head listless and limp. There was a scuffle and scream behind him, loud enough that Cody shocked back to full consciousness with it. 

“Sounds like your friend don’t know what’s good for him,” Joel said, taking Cody’s bloodied hand and forcing it to his thigh again. “Or what’s good for you.” 

“No,” he shook his head, his eyes so wide. “No, please!” 

“Tell him to cooperate,” Joel said. 

“Do what he says!” Cody screamed. “Just do it, please!” 

Joel pressed the knife to the base of his ring finger and cut. He was almost surprised at how easy it was to force the blade through the bone and sinew. He could barely feel the strain of it as Cody screamed below him. The knife sank a bit into his leg as it cut through the last of the skin and Joel picked the finger up, holding it in front of Cody’s crying eyes. 

“She scream like you?” Joel asked, turning the piece of his captive slowly before them both, the wet of his blood catching the light like the fractures in the glass of his watch. “You like hearin’ it like I like hearin’ you?” 

“Please,” Cody managed, voice ragged and hoarse.

“Why’d you do it?” He asked, lowering the severed finger but keeping it firmly in his grip. “You already took her, already were handing her over to that… animal. Why’d you need to hurt her, too.” 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. Joel thrust the knife into his upper thigh, inches shy of the man’s crotch and he gasped, mouth open in a silent scream. He was wearing out, inching closer and closer to death. 

“Don’t give a shit about your sorry,” Joel said. “Why. Tell me.” 

He gave Cody a second to start to recover from the pain before twisting the knife, making him seize again. 

“Tell me.” 

“She tried to run!” He sobbed, collapsing back down again. “She… she tried to run, killed two of my men. And she never… never appreciated what I did for her then…” 

Joel just nodded slowly. You’d been able to try to run, at least before Cody took your fingers. You weren’t so scared that you couldn’t move, weren’t so beaten that you couldn’t run. That was a good sign. You were a survivor. He had to remember that. You’d survived before. You would now, too. You would still be alive for him to find, for him to save, and he would save you. If it was the last thing he did, he would save you.

“Joel,” Tommy was at his side and it was quiet at his back. “Same spot.” 

“Good,” Joel said. He carefully picked your fingers up from where they’d fallen in the leaves at Cody’s side and tucked them away in his pocket again before getting to his feet. Ellie was at his side, her rifle in her hands. 

“I want to hurt him,” she said, her voice flat. 

Joel looked at her, really looked at her for the first time since they’d found Cody. There was a darkness in her eyes that terrified him in its familiarity. It was the look she’d had for a split second when he’d found her after David had taken her from him. It was sharp and vicious and demanding and Joel wasn’t sure she knew how to come back from it. 

“Will hurtin’ him help you?” Joel asked as gently as he could. She looked up at him, that sharp look still in her eyes. 

“He hurt my mother,” she said, a hint of barely contained rage on her face. “I need to make him pay.” 

He considered her for a second, trying to think clearly as he looked at the young woman who had once been the girl he’d shepherded across the country. In so many ways, she was still that little girl, one who he’d protected and failed at protecting, one who he had saved and had led to her near demise.

Would this be any worse than anything she had already suffered? Would it hurt her any worse than the things that Joel had allowed on his watch before, when he hadn’t been good enough to take care of her the way she deserved? Would it be, somehow, any more terrible because he allowed it? 

Ellie was so like him in so many ways, ways that terrified him when he thought about it. There was a passion in her that so easily bloomed into rage and he knew what it was to keep that stifled and smothered. He knew, too, what it was to take it out on another human being, even one who deserved it. 

He adjusted his grip on the knife and held the handle out to her. She went to take it but he pulled it back for a moment. 

“Can’t kill him,” Joel said. “Understand?” 

“Joel…” Tommy said at his back, but Joel just held out his empty hand, silencing him. 

“Understand?” He repeated, watching Ellie closely. 

She hesitated a moment, watching him back with those sharp, dark eyes. 

“I understand,” she said, taking the knife from him and turning to Cody. She cocked her head, examining him cooly. 

“Please,” the man whispered, looking up at her. 

“Which fingers did he take?” Ellie asked, not looking back at Joel. 

“Outside two,” Joel said, a twinge in his chest as he said it. “Her wedding ring with ‘em.” 

Ellie nodded, her grip tightening on the knife before lowering her knee to pin Cody’s wrist of his intact hand to the ground. 

“I told you I was gonna fucking kill you,” she said, her voice dangerous as the man tried weakly to pull his arm away from her. “My dad told me not to do that. But I am going to make you fucking pay.” 

She slammed the knife into his hand with a sharp, angry cry, more hacking at him than cutting, striking him again and again until she was splattered with blood and Cody had screamed himself to silence. Joel’s stomach twisted at the sight of it, the satisfaction at knowing Cody’s agony twinged with an ache of his own at the sound of Ellie’s pained scream. 

“If you’re just gonna let her fuckin’…” Tommy snapped, nudging Joel roughly to the side and stepping around him to wrap his arms around Ellie from behind, forcing her to still. She quieted then, no longer screaming and just sobbing instead. “It’s OK baby girl. C’mon, let’s get you cleaned up…” 

“No!” She tried to shake him loose but he held firm. “I want him to hurt! I want to make him hurt, I want him fucking dead, he doesn’t deserve it, he doesn’t deserve to live, he doesn’t…” 

“I know,” Tommy said gently. “I know. But you hear him? He’s passed out, you’re not gonna make him regret this any more than he already does and Joel’s gonna finish him. He’s not gonna live, OK? He’s paid for it, he’s hurt for it, it’s OK baby girl.” 

The knife slipped from her hold then, lying beside the mangled flesh and bone that had once been Cody’s hand. His pinky and ring fingers were completely gone. 

“C’mon,” Tommy said again. “Gonna get you cleaned up, let Joel finish the job, then we’ll get movin’. You’re OK.” 

He pulled her gently to her feet and gave Joel a deadly look as he passed, Ellie gathered against his side as he led her away. 

Joel knelt and picked up the knife, every inch of it splattered in blood now. He didn’t care. He took Cody’s chin in his hand and gave his head a sharp shake and the man gave a sharp gasp before trying to cough but choked on his own blood instead, his eyes opening slowly. He couldn’t even lift his head now, his eyes the only thing it seemed he could really move. 

“Wanted you to be awake for this,” Joel said, his voice a deadly calm. “Wanted to make sure you felt it. Wanted to be sure you knew why you were dying.”

Joel thrust the knife into Cody’s side, burying it fully between two ribs and twisting it there. His eyes went wide and his body thrashed as much as it could but it was a useless endeavor. He started gasping for breath, the gurgling sound of him starting to drown in his own blood overwhelming the sound of the woods around them as Joel pulled the knife from his side. 

“You could have lived, you know,” Joel continued. “Could have spent the rest of your years anywhere but Jackson, never would have looked for you. She asked me not to look for you, to just leave you alive. Felt like she owed you somethin’. Maybe she thought you’d been a good man once, long time ago. But you and me, we know the truth. You were never a good man, never had it in you to be good. You didn’t deserve her mercy so you ain’t gettin’ mine.”

“You…” he gasped and choked. “Promised…” 

“Promised what?” He asked. “To make it quick for you?” 

He didn’t give Cody a chance to respond. Joel just shrugged. 

“I lied.” 

He thrust the knife in between the same ribs on the other side, twisting it and pulling it free before wiping the worst of the blood on Cody’s pants and getting back to his feet. He put his hand in his pocket, the one that held the pieces of you. He traced your wedding band with his thumb, feeling your cold skin below his touch. How many times had this flesh laced with his? How many times had it tangled in his hair or squeezed his arm or touched his cheek? 

He held it himself now, trying to keep the pieces of you warm as Cody drowned in his own blood. His dying breaths were harsh and rasping and desperate, the last gasp of his mortality clinging to this life as though there was anything but pain to be found for him here. As if there was anything he deserved beyond pain. Just before the light left his eyes, Joel picked Cody’s fingers up off the ground and opened his mouth, forcing them inside. He stood back again, watching as he tried to take two quick, shallow breaths around them before going completely still. 

“Joel,” Tommy said from behind him. 

Joel looked down at Cody’s body for a moment longer. This man had hurt you, raped you, taken you. He was dead now, at Joel’s hand. There was justice in that. He spit on his body all the same. 

He turned to find his brother and daughter standing side by side, Ellie’s eyes still sharp but rimmed in red, her cheeks puffy. Both of them were wet, Ellie no longer splattered in blood. 

“We should move,” Joel said, stalking toward Cody’s horse. Tommy just watched him as Joel mounted up, the horse pawing at the ground for a moment as he got settled. He looked back at his brother. “If you ain’t got the stomach, Tommy, I’ll do this myself…” 

“I’m comin’,” Tommy said, going to another horse and mounting up, too. “Just hope you don’t get lost in the process.” 

Joel didn’t say anything. What was there to say? That the man he had the potential to be had left when you did? That, without you, there was nothing left to lose? 

He didn’t need to say it. Somehow, he was sure, Tommy knew. 

Instead, he nudged his horse forward, starting on the path given to him by the man he’d left in pieces on the ground. 

A/N: So Joel is pretttttttty damn feral at this point. I'm not sure I've ever written a Joel quite this unhinged and that's not even accounting for the fact that the juxtaposition between Jackson Joel and Feral Joel is pretty harsh. He's just gone, at least for now.

There are just three chapters left of this fic now (I think, the way some of this chapter flowed means it may grow to 41 chapters but I don't think so)! Next chapter is going to be a big one, one that's been building for the whole of this fic and I'm so excited for it. I hope you are, too!

Thanks for being here through this INSANELY lengthy journey both in word/chapter count and in time. It feels like we've been with Joel and Bambi forever and that's because we kind of have been - almost a year now! I hope you've enjoyed the ride. I know I have.

Love you!

Taglist: @ashleymsnodgrass@planet-marz1@kalea-bane @juneswonderlust @ilovepedro @h-annahayy @starstruckmusiciansartghost @beccerjune @mumma-moonchild @netonetoneto @mellymbee @purplelye @n7cje @flugazi @evyiione @randomhoex @aliengirl99 @orcasoul @reds-ramblings @pedropascalsbbg @fupoola @tinypotatothing @knopes-waffles @lilmizmoz @ayamenimthiriel @jenispunk @panda-pascal @sarap-77 @flugazi @your-slutty-gf @daniegraceg @partyofone3413 @cumberpegg @noisynightmarepoetry. @fifia-writes @grumpygrumperton @srmacaroni @txlady37 @bigboiseason123 @ashleyfilm @arizonadreamingg

#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #yearling #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x oc

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

05/26/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Vico Ortiz; Samba Schutte (Tangy & Zangy); TellTaleAwards; Emmy4Taika; Watch Party Reminders; OFMD Big Bang 2024!; Fan Spotlight; MerMay; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Today's Taika

== Vico Ortiz ==

Finally got some of the pictures from the Them Fatale Vico participated in a while back!

Source: Vico Ortiz' IG stories

== Samba Schutte ==

Awww, Samba made an amazing new desert! This time with the theme Tangy & Zangy <3

Source: Samba Schutte's Instagram

== Tell Tale Awards ==

The Tell-Tale TV Awards voting are up! There are several categories with Queer shows so if you have the time please take some time to fill them in! You can vote for up to 3 per category. Not only does OFMD show up, but Good Omens, Deadloch, Dead Boy Detectives, etc.

OFMD Categories Below:

Favorite Cable or Streaming Comedy Series (Round 1) - Our Flag Means Death

Favorite Performer in a Cable or Streaming Comedy Series (Round 1) - Rhys Darby / Ruibo Qian

== Emmy Considerations ==

You asked and they made it happen! Thank you to our friends over at Our Flag Means Fanfiction for more Emmy Consideration graphics, this time for Taika! Here's the Google Drive

Everyone is encouraged to make your own as well! If you do I'd love to see them so please be sure to share!

== Watch Party Reminders ==

Our Flag Means Death Season 2 May 28-31 (we're skipping Memorial Day) Times: 3:30 pm PT / 6:30pm ET / 11:30 pm BST Need access? We're doing a WP on the RhysDarbyFaction Discord server, feel free to hit me up on tumblr @gentlebeardsbarngrill or @ aspirantabby42 on Twitter for access.

== OFMD Big Bang 2024! ==

For all of you who're seasoned OFMD tumblr folks, you probably have heard of OFMD Big Bang before! For our newer members of the fandom check out the description below by OFMD Big Bang Tumblr.

What is the Our Flag Means Death Big Bang? A big bang is a writing and art challenge pairing authors and artists to complete a long work of fiction. The OFMD Big Bang is centered around stories which take place in the Our Flag Means Death universe with a minimum word count requirement of 10,000. 

Interested in joining? Author and Artist sign-ups open on June 1! Here's the upcoming Schedule. Visit the @ofmdbigbang tumblr for more information!

== Fan Spotlight ==

= Cast Cards =

Today's Cast Card is Stephen Papps, aka an English Lieutenant from "Mermen". Thanks @melvisik!

Source: @melvisik's Twitter

== Big Gay Energy Podcast ==

Our crewmates over at Big Gay Energy Podcast have a new episode out! This time they're discussing Season 1 Episode 10! Listen in on your favorite podcast platform via their Linktr.ee.

== Mermay ==

= Snejpowa =

Day 26: Teal More Mermay! I love that some folks took Teal and did something with Stede, and others with Oluwande! Thanks @snejpowa for this iconic Stede scene, you can feel the wobble!

Source: Snejpowa's Tumblr

= blueberreads =

Wow! Check out this gorgeous rendition of Oluwande and his Teal earring for Day 26 of MerMay by @blueberreads! That is gorgeous!

Source: @blueberreads' Tumblr

= GooGooGoJob! =

As usual @googoogojob has some more stunning work for MerMay! Day 18: Calypso's Birthday / Day 19: Rowboat / Day 20: High on a Rocky Ledge

== Stjernegaupe ==

Our friend @stjernegaupe has so many more MerMay fun submissions! I love how they interpret the various prompts! I want the Revenge for a flag!

== Love Notes ==

Hey Crew! I hope the weekend was kind to you and you got to do something fun!

I'm a bit off today. I hope you can forgive me for not saying much. Please remember that you are such a gift to this world. I think about you all a lot, and I hope you know you're doing great. Just a little love note from someone else today. Have a good Monday-- whether it's a holiday or a workday. Take care <3

Source: AlexaAubreyPoetry on Instagram

== Daily Darby / Today's Taika =

Tonight's theme is just these two giving each other hugs cause I need more of it in this life. Gif Courtesy of @usersukuna

#ofmd daily recap #ofmd #our flag means death #save ofmd #long live ofmd #adopt our crew #tell tale awards #samba schutte #vico ortiz #ofmd big bang 2024 #e #emmy4taika #Instagram

[maniculum]

Bestiaryposting Results: Lumchagg

Another one that's immediately recognizable if you spot its most-known characteristic, but I had to keep this one in because I thought it was entertaining that the author was clearly working from two different sources and, rather than try and reconcile the two, apparently just copied two slightly-different accounts and left them like that.

If you're not sure what I'm talking about, you can find an explanation and previous posts at https://maniculum.tumblr.com/bestiaryposting. The entry that people are working from this time can be found here:

And here's the one that folks will be drawing this week, if you want to get in on it:

Anyway, art below the cut:

@silverhart-makes-art (link to post here) noted the apparent existence of a larval stage in the second half of the entry, and drew a creature that's part Australian firehawk and part moth. I think this design is extremely cool, and does a good job extrapolating from the ideas of a bird that makes its own funeral pyre and apparently starts life as a larva.

@sweetlyfez (link to post here) went kind of a flamingo direction with this one, noting that a purple bird might acquire that coloration from its diet the same way flamingos do, which is cool. I also like the idea that its pyre/container is a silver censer, which is oddly accurate to medieval depictions -- I've definitely seen a couple of medieval images of this bird where its "nest" looks a lot like a fancy bowl. (Also thank you for including alt text.)

@kaerran (link to post here) makes note of a bit of a camera quality issue, but has what I think is a really clever idea. They've chosen to make their Lumchagg quite small, so that their "container" could in fact be the contents of a spice rack. A convenient solution for the modern Lumchagg with a high tolerance for plastic fumes. (Also thank you for including alt text.)

@ectocs (link to post here) has plotted out the lifecycle of a bird-thing that genuinely looks more like a dinosaur than anything, which I like a lot. That is a cool-looking bird. I also like the facial expressions a lot -- maybe it's just my imagination, but that blobby little worm stage seems quite pleased with itself. I strongly recommend clicking on the linked post to see a number of additional doodles and notes from the design process, which are very interesting in my opinion.

@cheapsweets (link to post here) has done this drawing in a nice dark purple ink, which is both pleasant and appropriate. The bird looks very cool, and I find the worm quite charming. I also appreciate the detail put into the pyre/nest/whatever here. It's good. I like it.

@pomrania (link to post here) notes that the medieval definition of "bird" is quite flexible, and of course worm and wyrm were more or less interchangeable... so this is a dragon. Entirely fair, I can't argue with that. It's pretty cute, too.

@coolest-capybara (link to post here) also gives us a life-cycle drawing, complete with a pupa, which I think is a nice and appropriate touch. They note the ambiguity of the term purple in pre-modern sources, so their Lumchagg has a more general colorful & iridescent look. I really like the parrot-worm-thing in the middle of the tree there.

To the Aberdeen Bestiary:

Yep, that's a bird. Presumably the trees are meant to represent frankincense and myrrh, both of which I believe are made from tree resin. Very good Stylized Trees, naturally. The bird, which kind of just looks like a hawk, also seems to be resting on an invisible perch, presumably because the artist wasn't sure what to do with the legs of a bird in flight.

There's also a second illustration:

That absolutely does not help identification, but I think a majority of participants clocked that this is the phoenix.

A few people noted that they hadn't known that phoenices (phoenixes? you know what, it doesn't matter, there's only one of them at a time anyway) were supposed to be purple. Others commented on the odd note about Arabia and the color purple, speculating as to what purple pigment was being referred to. I am excited to tell you that these two things are linked: the famous Tyrian Purple dye was originally used by... [drum roll]... the Phoenicians.

I actually had to delete a word from the entry before posting, because the original reads:

The phoenix is a bird of Arabia, so called either because its colouring is Phoenician purple, or because there is only one of its kind in the whole world.

The other part of the etymological explanation there is later explained by the assertion (the basis of which I do not know) :

The Arabs call a solitary man phoenix.

Also to be clear, there's not exactly a broad pre-modern consensus about phoenix coloration. Everyone seems to agree that it's brightly colored, but what colors vary widely. (However, it should be noted that "red" and "purple" are both popular options, and moreover that those colors are not always differentiated in older texts.)

It's tempting to say that the frankincense & myrrh is here probably just acting as a Christian resurrection metaphor because the authors are monks, but it is in fact the case that multiple medieval descriptions of the phoenix have it making use of valuable plants, including those. In the Old English Wonders of the East, it builds its nest from cinnamon. Herodotus (who says the phoenix is red and gold) mentions the phoenix using myrrh, but not as a nest or funeral pyre -- each new phoenix embalms the body of the previous phoenix in myrrh to be interred at the Temple of the Sun. Pliny (purple and gold, with a blue tail) has the nest made from cinnamon, incense, and perfumes, and when the little worm grows large enough it carries the nest, along with the remains of its predecessor, to said temple. Neither Herodotus nor Pliny mention the fire thing, interestingly, so I suspect it might have come in later. The Wonders of the East does mention the fire, but it has no opinion on the coloration.

I can feel myself falling into a rabbit hole, so I'm just going to cut this one off here.

#maniculum bestiaryposting #lumchagg

[sailorsenshishitposter]

Kento Nanami x Reader

Kento Nanami:

You love hard working men, your favorite thing in the world is bread and you would love to take a relaxing vacation trip if you had some time off.

First Date:

You exited the bakery, holding a fresh sandwich in your hand. You found a bench to sit down on and then nibbled some of the bread. You then began to notice some birds near you. "Hey little guys. I bet you're hungry." You broke off a piece of your sandwich. "Here. Take some." They happily chirped back, thankful for some crumbs. Everything was going fine until you noticed a young boy coming towards your way.

He was holding something. Some sort of stick maybe? He then began to try and swat the birds. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING? STOP IT!" He continued to slash, smiling while doing so. Before you could do anything, someone had stopped him. It was a large blonde man. You couldn't help but blush from how attractive he was. 'He's more packed then the bakery...'

You then stopped your drooling as you noticed that he was yelling. "-and if you think about trying this again then I'll make sure to not only to inform you parents, but the police as well!" He then let go of the child and they dropped to the ground and scrambled off. "Pardon me, I didn't mean for you to see that. If you'll just excuse me." You grab his hand. "Wait! I'd like to ask you something actually. What do you think of meeting up at the bakery next time? Let me pay as thanks for saving those birds!"

You then learned the man was named Kento Nanami. You grew closer over the next few months and began to learn more about each other. He had left his previous job to start teaching. Adorable. Despite being stoic he was really just a big softie. You thought it was sweet that he cared for his students as they were his own.

One day you received the worst call imaginable. It was your boyfriend. All you knew was that there was a fire and that he was in critical condition. You made it to the hospital as fast as you could. He was in stable condition but his body had been badly burnt on one side and he had lost partial vision. The nurse then left the two of you alone. You would ask why she had stitches on her forehead but you were far more concerned about the man laying next to you.

You went to the untouched part of his face and placed a kiss on his forehead. "Don't worry. We'll get through this, I swear! I promise that we'll both go to Malaysia once you're in better condition!" Once he was stable enough, the two of you talked with some investigators. It turns out the arsonist was well known to the police but they had no leads on him yet. They showed you a photograph and asked if you recognized him. Nope. You would definitely notice someone if they went around looking like Frankenstein.

------------------------------------

It was now six months later and Nanami was ready to be discharged. You helped push his wheelchair, understanding that this new way of life would not be an easy adjustment. You looked down at his face. "I'll always love you." He shed a few tears and you brushed them aside. You were definitely booking tickets to a five star hotel in Malaysia tonight.

Just as the two of you were crossing the road, a large vehicle came heading your way. "TRUCK KUUUUUUUN!!!" the driver shouted. Wait a minute. You recognized this guy. This was the asshole that did this to your boyfriend! He then began to sing. "GAS, GAS, GAS, I'M GONNA STEP ON THE GAS!"

You tried to react but it was now too late. Nanami pushed you out of the way, sacrificing himself. You survived but at what cost? You looked back in horror, only seeing Kento's lower remains and you began to sob. The man got out of the truck and looked directly at the reader. "I guess he's half the man he used to be! That's all folks!"

#shitpost #cursed #crack fic #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #nanami kento #nanami x reader #jjk nanami #jjk kento #jjk #Don't worry Nanami fans #You can always latch onto Higuruma #I'm sure nothing bad happens to him #nurse kenjaku #But more of a cameo than anything #Mahito commits arson and you stay with Nanami in the hospital #all good things must come to an end and once discharged Nanamin is run over by Mahito #He sings initial d while doing it #I purposely picked this gif for Nanamin simps to click on

[hillbillyoracle]

“Tradition is peer pressure from dead people” will never not read incredibly privileged to me. 

#no thank you #I don't get why so many people feel the need #to add do whatever you want! #on the ends of my posts #this is not that kind of blog #and I'm not sure what made folks think it was #I actually do think #if you're gonna celebrate a holiday #like some effort to tie it #to the holiday should be made #like congrats #you have enough ties to your traditions #to reject them and make stuff up #some of us are painstakingly #trying to reconnect #post family trauma #bleh #not my bag #also this is a pagan blog #I really value dead people #being so dismissive of ancestors ain't it

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: March 27

"Long Time Gone" by The Chicks

#song of the day #I'm still thinking about the Country Songs About Country Songs #this is actually a cover too though I never hear the original around anywhere #(it's by Darrell Scott who is also the originator for 'You'll Never Leave Harlan Alive' #turns out he's got a bunch of songs that got picked up and made somewhat more popular in the hands of other folks. an interesting legacy) #the best lines of this song to sing are also the bits About Country Music--well the whole song's about chasing the love of it #but this bit is bemoaning the kids these days you know. country music isn't what it used to be. why back in my day etc etc #it's so so so much fun to sing too because you get to exaggerate your 'I think's until they rhyme with 'Hank'. excellent work #'we listen to the radio to hear what's cookin / but the music ain't got no soul #now they sound tired but they don't sound Haggard / they got money but they don't have Cash #they got Junior but they don't have Hank / I think I think I think / the rest is a long time gone' #it's fascinating to me to think about these songs in (saying 'historical' here is giving me psychic damage but) historical context #because the Darrell Scott original for Long Time Gone came out in 2000 and The Chicks released their version in 2002 #so they were talking about the trend towards American jingoism in country music of the time #versus like Waylon Jennings in 1975 'Are You Sure Hank Done It This Way' #(I typed that and /then/ went back and looked up the release date and I'm so proud I got it right) #already bemoaning the state of country music in the 70s versus good old classic country like Hank Williams Senior sang #(Hank Jr covered Waylon's song in 1981. like yes it's a tribute to his father but also Hank Jr was a big push towards outlaw country #and has a few pretty famous songs himself about not singing like his daddy did. it just seems a strange choice to me) #and then Eric Church put out 'Lotta Boot Left to Fill' in 2009 calling out the shallowness of the country music scene of the time #(talking some only-thinly-veiled shit about a few of his peers in the process) #and then he released 'Stick That In Your Country Song' in 2021 and that /definitely/ put some backs up #that one's a less directed but more direct call-out if that makes any sense #no lines that are direct references to other artists' songs but stronger sentiments overall #not just general 'y'all are getting shallow prioritizing good times and high sales over genuine heart and integrity of craft' #but some straight up 'you have forgotten the face of your father' shit towards country artists and fans alike. the whole industry #a very good righteous-anger song

[47-protons]

many thoughts head full yet so devastatingly empty (< my brain is going about a billion miles per hour and i cannot slow it down enough to put any of the thoughts into any type of coherent statement) ((it is flicking wildly back and forth between q/smp and usmp. like if you took a metronome and set it to like a billion BPM.))

I have never frantically edited a post faster to put a slash between four letters

#hi i'm listening to winter's come and gone and i'm being Normal about it #''little black bird on my wire line. dark as troubles in this heart of mine.'' #and my brain is shoving Winter's Come and Gone. The Blackest Crow. and Foreign Lander. it's shoving all of them in a blender and i am havin #am having MANY thouhgts. absolutely brain rattlers. #the blackest crow that ever did flew would surely turn to white if ever i prove false to you bright day would turn to night #bright day would turn to night my love the elements would mourn if ever i proved false to you the seas would rage and burn #i lie awake out in the night. i see the shining stars. i wonder if you see them too wherever you are. #i'm normal. :+1: #i wish my breast were made of glass wherein you might behold upon my heart your name lies wrote in letters made of gold #in letters made of gold my love believe me when i say you are the darling of my heart. until my dying day. #Goes into Flick's character playlist. whacks apocalypse lullaby in there at mach 4 #my brain is Rattling with everything from sp/iderbit to phil to forever to flick and usmp s2 brainrot (< again) #i am Extremely abnormal about the end of s2 #more accurately. i am going through my playlist of chill folk/bluegrass tunes bc i have been having Feelings about. smth I will probably #never say out loud. i like the russian girl thing on like. tiktok and instagram. it is interesting and neat #to learn about other people's cultures- even if specifically it's about them feeling disconnected from theirs. #there is a rotting in my chest. there is no culture here. i don't think the US as a whole can go ''aha this is the american culture'' what #work until you die. never get healthcare. have every other country hate you. that's fair. #i am sitting with the bluegrass songs my grandma would sing me to sleep with when i was a baby and i am being normal #it took me two years before i could listen to Ashoken Farewell without bawling. they played that at her funeral. specifically my cousin #got up and played it. I'm normal. i'm so normal about this. culture can be school shootings and rampant capitalism but it can also be. banj #banjo and fiddle. i want to go to the bluegrass festival this year. i think it will be good for me. #america on the whole. probably does not have a unified cultural identity. and i guess that's okay #i'll align myself out towards the oklahoman panhandle and all the goatheads i got as a kid. i never saw the problem with quacki/ty's bedroo #i liked the rock walls. it reminded me of my grandma's house. she had a dugout. i miss it (< lost it in a wildfire a year after she died) #it wasn't like. a sod house. it was entirely underground though for Years until they had my uncle aaron and needed an extra room so then th #they got a Single upstairs room. The stairs were back by the cellar. i miss it. my mom would tell stories of the bus dropping her off and #classmates telling her ''there's a cow on your roof'' #i miss it. i should go to sleep i think #i don't think i've ever felt 'american' but i sure have felt 'kansan' and that's. okay enough for me i think

[izzy-b-hands]

I really wish blocking someone meant their stuff wouldn’t wind up on your dash at all. Like I understand why it doesn’t, but. still.

Actually, I just need to get better abt checking source urls before I reblog. I try to be mindful, but now and again I Forget and have only myself to blame lmao

#text post #I would love to reblog their art and be supportive in that way at least but tbh #every time I accidentally reblog it I remember checking out their blog and seeing how they talked abt fans that like Izzy and the izcourse #and it's like oh no that's right you hate ppl like me and ur art might be gorg but maybe we just shouldn't interact #they do their thing and I'll be over here doing mine #what really needs to happen is I need to remember to check urls on fandom art to make sure it isn't any of the folks I had to block lmao #but sometimes I get excited bc the art is genuinely lovely and i do like it and think the person is v talented! #and then i forget to check and it's only after scrolling my dash that i see my reblog and the url and go 'oh. fuck. that's right. damnit.' #it's a weird feeling to be like yes I want this person to have fun and make gorgeous art but also it seems #they've made it p clear how they feel abt folks like me and so maybe they would prefer i just fuck off #which i tried to do by blocking!! and yet. here we are #i delete the reblogs whenever this happens so they don't have me in their notes but #i do hope they know their art is lovely and I appreciate their hard work even if we wouldn't otherwise get along with each other #idek why I'm blogging abt this I guess bc I feel like usually it's either or online? like u either hate each other or u don't #but I don't hate the folks who sent shit to me or the folks who condoned it i just wish i had found a way to get along with them instead #as useless a wish as that probably is #and i don't talk abt it a lot but it really bugs the fuck outta me sometimes that we can't just start over and try to interact generally #no messages no trying to be friends just reblog from them if u like and otherwise ignore each other #which has been a thing that's worked fairly okay in other fandoms tho things have happened in others to change how workable it was #but for some reason in this one i feel like im just always walking on eggshells to interact w/anyone bc it feels like everyone is waiting #for someone else to say something they vaguely disagree with and instead of just like. blocking and moving on w/the fandom experience #it turns into a massive mess that even if ur on the fringes of it all you still get pulled into or sent shit and just. #idk it doesn't matter bc ultimately none of this does but dang it the show has been special to me and hits all my special interests #and it's hard to let go and accept that there's no changing how things went and how they are and how this fandom experience for me is often #very fucking lonely even when i'm bursting at the seams to share and to hear from others what they think abt anything and everything w/it #no one is gonna read this tag essay lmao pls scroll on

[apollo-cackling]

not trying to be mean but honestly any sentiment that's like "[non-Traditional form/genre of literature*] raised my bar for queer representation so much I can't ever return to Published Books because it's all bad straight stuff/straight people writing queerness/etc" is kind of distasteful to me now. they're there. there's literally plenty** out there now if you just look.

[edit: I want to clarify that I don't think published books are inherently better than any other forms of literature and that I'm not trying to say people should always aspire to have a media diet of only 100% Published Literature (the assumptions inherent in which create a false dichotomy anyway bc plenty of published queer books I've read are fun romps whose themes are incidental to the main goal of being fun)

I just dislike the sentiment I've seen around that mainstream queer stuff is either just subtext or written Inauthentically because it's just. untrue. and it cedes ground to queerphobic people saying the only ground queer stories can occupy is artless smut/popcorn trash with no meaning (which isn't a bad thing to be in and of itself, but it's hardly like queerness can't be artistic)]

The Darkness Outside Us came out last year. Ophelia After All came out this year. The Honeys came out this year. the second book of Burning Kingdoms came out this year. Zachary Ying came out this year. Delilah Green came out this year. This is Why They Hate Us came out this year. And that's just the few on my 'anticipated of 2022' GR shelf (+ The Darkness Outside Us because goddamn that book was good).

it's completely fine to be dissatisfied with how the publishing industry (/mainstream media but I'm mostly read so) is! I also have many gripes with it! but it just feels distasteful to demean Published Books on the whole as if it (/other mainstream media but again see above) is a monolith and diminish the the very queer queer books by queer - gender and sexuality - authors (Ocean Vuong, Akwaeke Emezi, Victoria Lee, CB Lee, Ashley Herring Blake, Shaun David Hutchinson, need I go on?)

it's mostly a massive pet peeve of mine but it just feels kinda. lazy? obviously if something like this's post date was like 2010 or if it was a situation where access not awareness is the problem etc that's a different situation but like. most of the posts/tweets/etc I've seen of this are recent and most of them have the tone of "it's perfectly safe for me to read/watch queer media I just couldn't find any" which

I really started reading queer books in 2020ish. I googled 'queer fantasy' (because I like fantasy) and found a bunch of different booklists, took a few recs and just started there. I found lgbtqreads. I followed a few queer folks on GR (once you look through a certain type of books' reviews a few common names start popping up) and noted down the books they were reading and now I have a bunch of queer books that I need to get around to.

I just. if you're into books there's plenty of queer books literally right there (and recently enough big publishers have started publishing them that they're appearing in libraries too). it's not a dichotomy. you don't have to read Published Books if you don't want to but it's not all straight there goddammit. and this isn't even bringing up self-published books

#*fanfic，d/nmei (chinese bl) etc #<- to avoid maintagging #**still not a lot on a percentage basis of total books published (aside from self pub) yeah publishing industry bad but still plenty #in general I dislike the idea that any category of media is inherently anything #also the phrase 'd/nmei raised the bar for queer stories for me' is a bit funny to me bc. these are webnovels. most of them 80+ chapters #and like from what I've seen most of them are either 100ish or 300ish chapters #I don't think they've really gotten popular until recently either too so I doubt most folks have fully read more than two lol #imagine if I watched bloom into you and said 'anime changed queer stories for me' lol #the specific post I saw that got me to put this into words was this one post on the d/nmei subreddit about how reading western quote 'BL' #feels off compared to d/nmei bc they felt like badly written wattpad fics and unrealistic wrt queerness which I was side-eyeing pretty hard #eh it bothered me for a few reasons. some of them I think are fair - the ones I made this post for #some of them I'm not sure is fair which is why they're in the tags #specifically that the specific post reminded me of the stereotype of the straight girl completely uninterested in the messiness and #complexities of queerness or exploring queerness at all (unless it's aestheticised suffering) and just wants to see pretty boys together #but I'm not sure how fair that is because I'm not transmasc and I'm not mlm lol #anyway yea lol #my rambles #queer stuff #media #10n

[bitchthefuck1]

yikes... you worshiping male characters regardless of what they do while criticizing jen walters for the few bad aspects of her show that can be attributed to the writers and not her... your blog says everything about why you make it a point to hate watch she-hulk every week and it's incredibly disappointing. i'm not some mcu fan who loves everything they put out, but man, it's tiring seeing people criticize media like she-hulk in bad faith waaaay more than mediocre white male media. oh well :/

This is... actually really funny because you don't always get anon hate that tells on itself so much.

I've been very clear and consistent about specifying that I don't dislike Jen Walters and in fact really like how she's portrayed by Tatiana Maslany. Her performance is the only really worthwhile thing the show has to offer, and it's why I find it so frustrating that they don't really do anything interesting with her. Every post I've made has been about the writing or specific narrative choices or the CGI or something to that effect.

As for me "worshipping male characters", whomst??? I'm not even really sure who this is about, as there's not a single male character I've posted about uncritically on here. Best guess is that this is about Matt Murdock, which like... I drag him constantly for being a shitty person and a crappy friend. I think his narrative arc is incredibly compelling and the Netflix series was really good, but I hope I don't need to explain to you that there's a difference between finding a character's narrative compelling and liking them as a person/co-signing their behavior, especially when you also criticize that behavior.

I think a lot of the criticism for she hulk has been bad faith dude bros whining because a woman was in a marvel thing, and that's dumb bullshit, but you can't lump all criticism in the same boat. My problem with she hulk, which is my problem with a lot of marvel's stories centered around women, is that they market them as though they're some groundbreaking feminist storytelling and then do very little to actually develop the story or characters well and coast on mediocrity that's only made passable by the talented women they cast. It's a huge disservice to the characters and to anyone who actually gives a shit about them. I'm not going to applaud them for crumbs, and if you're going to sell your work on it's "feminist storytelling" then you sure as shit better deliver more than a shallow girl power narrative. It's 2022.

#bestie idk whose blog youve been on but it sure as shit isnt mine #oh well :/ #genuinely dont know who the white men ive been worshipping are every possibility gets funnier than the last #if its one of the house of the dragon dudes that would be so funny I'm literally only here for R and A's interpersonal drama #like i do think there's a lot to be said about how media made by and aimed at women/poc/lgbtq folks/etc is often given much more scrutiny #to 'do it right' and you should be allowed to tell a story like that and be mediocre without people acting like you're 'failing the #movement' or whatever but if you're going to use the fact that this story is feminist as a selling point you cant then turn around and get #mad when people judge it through that lens. its comes off as a little disingenuous for a giant media corporation with a shitty track record #for female representation to be like 'this is groundbreaking' and then make their big green monster a barbie. #disney doesn't actually care about women babe. they just want more consumers to buy their shit and if that means putting out a low effort #'superheroes: for her' show they'll do it and collect the check #if im being charitable id say this is a misunderstanding based on the fact that she hulk is both her name and the shows name so like. its #possible that this person misread a post about the show as being about jen which like. i feel like ita pretty obvious from context that #thats not what im saying

[bibiana112]

I've been wanting to get back to answering stuff and clearing my drafts for a while but I'm tiredd and I am only to get more busy now because I got accepted to have a table in the artist's alley of a con my big sis is going to!! :D

#i have no clue how much new stuff I'm gonna have to draw in a couple weeks and then get to print #but!! this is pretty awesome and I'm sure I'll figure something out #the harshest thing is like I do need to make new stuff just so it sells since fandoms I have made stuff for already are so niche #but yeah big sister friend sent me the form some months back because she looks at artsy stuff and thinks of me :3 #but I didn't expect to get in this late I had all but given up and was figuring out how to go anyways #aaah I'll manage I gotta at least try #it's gonna be so much though it's right after my birthday and I'll have to stay at my folks place and then that #and then I'll come back watch my friends thesis me and roomie have been joking about wearing formalwear on the bus for it the whole year #aaah I'll have to cut my hair and get passing grades and ask that girl on another date beforehand too #what's wrong with me why does nothing happen for so long and then all of a sudden it's a thousand things at once #Void fala aí

[varjopeura]

.

#our dnd group is going to leave the dnd for a brief hiatus and try out a short campaign of dune rpg #and oh boy the character creation in this game is Horrible #easily the most frustrating character creation experience in any of the games i've played so far #why would you tell me what my highest skill is without giving any sort number for it until several pages later!! #i feel like this is written with the expectation that the player will read AND LEARN the entire chapter about characters #before making their first one to play. this does not make it easy to Just Start Playing which i think most folks probably would prefer #anyway i'm making a fremen warrior on an off-planet body guard/suicide mission and i love him dearly. can't wait to see if he survives :3 #but yeah i'm not entirely sure if these char creation rules are exceptionally bad or if i've just played games that are very good at it #gameplay itself seemed fine when we tried out a one-shot with pre-made characters. we'll see how this goes #sussitalk