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trangenderstan · 2 years

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My Stanley headcanons because im like that (featuring some others but they're all Stanley-centric)

He likes metal/hard rock music. Idk something about his whole attitude to hippie music and the "Youth these days" has so much "Ugh modern rock is nothing like old rock" vibes

Going back to the previous one, i totally see him listening to SOAD. Especially Chop Suey, Prison Song and Sugar

Basically canon, but he has severe depression. Definitely suicide attempts. Maybe getting institutionalized if Dipper and Mabel's guide is any indication

It also persists his whole life. Even on the Stan O' War with Ford. He's not very educated on the whole mental health biz so he definitely leaves the meds on land thinking "Oh well i got what i wanted now". When Ford finds out he's turning that boat around in a heartbeat

His bond with Dipper is almost just as strong as with Mabel. Dipper is just very insecure about being coddled and seen as "inferior". So Stanley opts to be cold and harsh with him to try and make Dipper feel independent and grown-up

Also i feel like Stanley sees a bit of himself in Dipper. Ready to sacrifice everything for his dumb sibling, having this inherent feeling of inferiority and has a hard time trusting people

I feel like he was involved in some drug-dealing business

A common one, but he kept in touch with their mother from time to time. That's how he got Ford's number

Continuing with the previous, but Stanley had a very meaningful bond with Caryn. Maybe she was one of the only people who genuinely saw good in him. Assuming she passes away while he's still posing as Ford he definitely attends her funeral. Just to say thank you and apologize. Apologize for making her suffer so much because of his, he thinks, selfish actions

Soos knows much more than he lets on. Stan told him about as much of his life as he could, or Soos found out himself. Soos is just too loyal to tell anyone, even when he sees that Stanley keeping secrets is backfiring horrendously

In turn, Stanley knows way too much about Soos. He rarely shows it, but when he does, it's "accidentally" shoplifting his favorite candy or "i had this old thing lying around" and it's the newest copy of a videogame Soos wanted badly. Soos never comments on it

I don't think he's a father figure to Wendy. More of a friend, really. The mature one in a friend group who loves to cause mischief but knows when to stop before anyone hurts themselves. Wendy can tell him things she'd never tell her real dad or family

If we're talking canon, then i hc him as aroace. But unlike Ford, he's the kind that desperately wants to feel romantic attraction, have a lifelong partner, get married, maybe even kids. He just never could, not even because of the circumstance, but because of his own brain chemistry. He accepts that part of himself when he and Ford set sail though. Who needs romance when you have your favorite person in the world right by your side?

He always had an interest in science/space. It just got suppressed by other people constantly telling him that he shouldn't like this thing, it's for smart people and not him. He also never really understood the hyper-academic wording in textbooks. But rebuilding the portal kind of reignited that spark. And now he gets into arguments with Ford over which solar system planet is superior and why

He also sometimes corrects Ford's mistakes. Think that Adventure Time moment where Finn is able to solve a problem because Bubblegum got too caught up in her genius

He's very touch-starved. And also loves physical intimacy, no matter how much he denies it. That's why he and Ford are often clinging to each other for absolutely no reason. Simple touches like hair ruffles and hands on shoulders and silent comfort that the other is here. I love these guys.

He has memory lapses. They're never going away but they do get easier to handle. But the fear of "What if this is the last time" never fades. That's why he keeps a personal diary addressed to himself. In case he never remembers again

Similarly, he goes through a bit of an identity crisis when he's erased. He's not the type to delve too deep into philosophical and pointless questions and yet something keeps telling him "Is he really Stanley if he can't remember his own name half the time"

I'm very passionate abt my autism headcanons... There's gonna be some Ford in these because you can't say "Autism headcanons in Gravity Falls" and not say "Stanford Pines"

He's autistic and has a special interest in boating. I hc him to definitely know how to build a whole vessel from scratch, remember the names of very specific things and constantly corrects Ford when he calls the galley a kitchen. When Ford complains he just cackles and says "This is how i felt growing up with you, suck it up for once"

Also boxing

Stan and Ford don't even talk to each other half the time on the Stan O' War. They will sit on the dock and stare into the distance like "Did you know that while hotter stars usually have bluish colors, blue flame on earth isn't nessesarily hotter than regular one?" "A ship and a boat's difference lies solely in their weight. A boat is a vessel that weighs under 500 tones and a ship weighs more than that obviously" and neither register what the other have said

Stanley is very invested in social behavior. Ford on the other hand is the complete opposite. This leads to Stanley reading other people better than any neurotypical does and Ford to have no social perception skills whatsoever

Stan never gets a diagnosis. I feel like Ford does. Eventually. Or in his 20s. Ford never talks to Stan about how they're literally two sides of the same coin. He just lets him feel safe and figure everything out on his own terms. Stan knows but never mentions it either

They also find unique ways to deal with their mutual issues. Offering a cup of coffee as a way of saying "I'm sorry", a lighthearted punch to the shoulder as a way of saying "It's ok, i forgive you". Neither are good with communicating, and especially hearing the other out but who cares. They're both old and mentally ill and neurodivergent

#suicide tw #i know my hcs are really mild #but they mean. so much to me #i'm a big canon appreciator so i try to stay within the appropriate setting #i swear if no one reads this i will cry #maybe a pt 2 later if i remember more #stanley pines #stan pines #headcanons

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starlitships-moved · 1 year

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Facts about my Gra.vity Fa.lls S/I:

🦇🐈‍⬛ She has many different nicknames - Echo, Squeak/Squeaks/Squeaky, Wings, Fangs, etc. (Mostly given to them by Stan XD) 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ Her real name is actually Eden Aspen. She doesn't like people to know her real name... feels too personal in a way... So they just go with whatever nickname people give them! 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ She was drawn to Gravity Falls a few years ago, since she has always been really interested in the unknown, cryptids, anomalies, you name it! 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ One day, while she was out exploring the forests of Gravity Falls, she got kinda lost... and night fell. She was bitten by a werecat AND one of those vampire/fruit bats... IN THE SAME NIGHT. 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ They started working at the Mystery Shack a little bit before Dipper and Mabel visited for the summer. 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ Is friends with both Soos and Wendy! Even Stan has a soft spot for them! 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ To hide her bat wings, cat ears and tail, she wears hats, hoodies etc. And hides the tail in her pants! The wings, though... You know the episode "The Love God"? How he hides his little cherub wings in his backpack? That's what she does! Just cut little holes in a backpack and puts her wings through it to look like a bat wing backpack! XD 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ The only time she can really be herself is when halloween and summerween come around... She just tells everyone that her ears, wings and tail are a costume! 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ In fact, Stan started calling her all of those little bat nicknames because of her little bat wing "backpack".... But honestly? He KNOWS she's some sort of anomaly. He isn't stupid! XD 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ He just doesn't see her as dangerous/a threat, so he lets her work at the shack! (Plus he needs the extra help... it's so hard to find folks who actually WANT to work there!) 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ The twins eventually find out her little secret as well! But instead of fear, they just think she's so cool! Mabel loves her "kitty" ears, and Dipper asks a billion questions about her condition... XD 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ They actually have a symbol on the Cipher Wheel: a pair of bat wings! Because of this, Bill refers to them as Wings a lot. 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ Speaking of Bill... She accidentally summoned him the same way Ford did years ago: by reading that incantation in the cave! However, she didn't make any deals with him. (She actually just thinks he's something her brain dreamt up - that he isn't a real creature!) She kind of becomes friends with him since he keeps visiting her dreams... (he was trying to get her to make a deal, but she didn't know that XD) He's been visiting her regularly for several years, and she just thinks he's her imaginary dream friend! X'D 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ However, once Ford shows his picture to the kids, she is SHOOK. She tries not to let Ford know that SHE knows him though... it's kinda complicated - Like a mixture of embarrassment and being afraid he'll think she's working with bill... 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ That night when Bill inevitably visits her dreams, she tries to distance herself from him... Which he doesn't seem to like very much! :o ( tbh I think Bill actually started getting attached to this weird little human XD Platonic, romantic, idk but he's definitely attached :o ) 🦇🐈‍⬛

🦇🐈‍⬛ After she kinda broke off the friendship/relationship thing with Bill, the events of several episodes and eventually weirdmageddon happened! ( I don't have concrete details yet on some of these things though. Maybe later! ) 🦇🐈‍⬛

#gravity falls s/i tag #s/i tag #long post #FINALLY came up with more info on my s/i!!!#I also wrote me x bill kind of ambiguous relationship bc I DO have a crush on him but wasn't quite sure if it was platonic; romantic or qpp #⚠️🦇🐈‍⬛~curiosity killed the batcat~🐈‍⬛🦇⚠️#👓~fordsy #⚠️🎩~the illuminacho~🎩⚠️

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itsthemysterykids · 2 years

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What are their quirks again?

Coraline: Mirage allows her to detect, create, and manipulate illusions. She can only create one illusion at a time, manipulate the senses of others, and she can see through any form of deceit. Perfect for if she happens to run into someone claiming to be her Other Mother

Warning: Using Mirage for too long can mess up her eyesight and make her see things that aren’t there

Wybie: His power, Metalsmith allows him to secrete metallic sweat and turn it into whatever weapon he desires. Like pro hero, Ground Zero and more powerful explosions, if he stores up enough of his sweat, he can create more powerful military-grade weapons, or even a car

Warning: Cold weather does NOT help

Norman: With the power, Poltergeist, he has all the powers of a ghost. Telekinesis, intangibility, floating, possession, you name it.

Warning: Keep him away from ghost hunters and salt

Neil: Shield allows him to create up to twelve shields at once to protect himself and others from oncoming attacks. He can even arm them with spikes on the surface if he focuses hard enough.

Warning: Using too many shields at once for a long period of time can wear him out

Dipper: His power, Sleuth gives him the ability track anything and anyone down by revealing different colored trails if he thinks about what he’s looking for hard enough

Warning: This power requires a good memory of whatever it is he’s looking for. So maybe take a picture of anything that might be important

Mabel: Her power is called Knitting, and with it, she can create weapons, animals, even armor all with yarn.

Warning: She needs a few dozen balls of yarn, and using her power too much can give her carpel tunnel, so make sure she takes breaks

Raz: His power is Extend, making him super flexible, agile, and able to stretch his limbs to all sorts of lengths and contort his body in unnatural ways like those circus contortionists

Warning: He can get tangled very easily

Lili: Nature Manipulation, like the name implies, allows her to manipulate nature, sometimes at will, sometimes unintentionally with her own emotions. She can make plants grow, shrivel up, then the leaves different colors, and weaponize flowers

Warning: Her allergies flare up when using her power for too long, so make sure she takes some medication

#coraline #mystery kids #paranorman #gravity falls #psychonauts #the mystery kids #ask stuff #answered ask #quirks #my hero academia

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august-anon · 3 years

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Complete Masterpost (as of 7/30/2021)

Here is a complete rebloggable masterpost of all my works sorted by fandom. Beneath the fandoms, they are sorted in order of when I posted them (except for series, which are sorted together). You can also find these on ao3 under august_anon, or on the Masterpost Page on my blog (which is sorted better tbh). Thanks for reading my works!

Avatar: The Last Airbender

(’20) Tickletober Day 3 - Stocks - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Aang, Ler!Sokka, Katara, Toph, Zuko - What else is Aang supposed to do when he finds a set of stocks in an abandoned town? NOT see if he could fit in them? 1151 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 9 - Ganged Up On - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Zuko, Ler!Aang, Toph, Katara, Sokka - They’d been plotting all week, and it was driving Zuko insane. The actual reason turned out a lot more innocent than Zuko was worried about. 713 words

You’re Dead - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Zuko, Ler!Aang - Aang has a little fun at Zuko's expense. 131 words

Lullaby of Laughter - [ao3] - Suzukka - Lee!Sokka/Ler!Zuko/Suki - Sokka's a bit too restless to fall asleep, and unfortunately all his fidgeting is keeping Suki and Zuko awake. Suki decides to show Zuko just how she tires Sokka out enough to sleep. 2038 words

Boku No Hero Acadamia (My Hero Acadamia)

(’20) Tickletober Day 18 - Holding It In - [ao3] - EraserMic - Lee!Aizawa/Ler!Yamada - Hizashi demands Husband Cuddles on their day off, but Shouta is being difficult. Luckily, Hizashi knows how to get his way. 799 words

Unrestrained Revenge - [ao3] - EraserMic - Switch!Aizawa/Switch!Yamada - Hizashi decides to take advantage of Shouta getting a little tangled up in his capture weapon. Shouta, of course, can't let that go without revenge. 1872 words

Lounge Day - [ao3] - EraserMic - Lee!Aizawa/Ler!Yamada��- Shouta had made it rather clear how he wanted the day to go, but what fun was that without a chase? 934 words

We Can Try - [ao3] - EraserMic - Lee!Yamada/Ler!Aizawa - Hizashi comes clean about something he's been craving for a long time, and Shouta is more than happy to assist. There's only one problem... Hizashi's convinced it won't work. 4347 words

Carry On/Simon Snow Series

On Love’s Light Wings - [ao3] - SnowBaz - Lee!Simon/Ler!Baz - Simon and Baz are having a quiet moment together under the stars, and Baz discovers something interesting about Simon's wings. 2888 words

Detroit: Become Human

(’20) Tickletober Day 16 - Massage - [ao3] - RK1000 - Lee!Connor/Ler!Markus - The new software patch has come through, and androids can now feel sensations a lot more similarly to humans. Markus plans to use this to treat his overworked boyfriend to a massage, but things don’t quite go as planned. 1770 words

Gravity Falls

(’20) Tickletober Day 1 - Unusual Spot - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Dipper, Ler!Mabel - Mabel not-so-accidentally reveals one of Dipper’s tickle spots. 610 words

Good Morning series

(’20) Tickletober Day 13 - Wake Up! - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Dipper, Mable, Ler!Stan - Stan may have difficulty recalling anything now, but at least he knows the kids will be a constant. 1691 words

Tickle Monster - [ao3] - Gen - Switch!Ford, Stan, Dipper, Mabel - Dipper and Mabel complete their mission, distracting Great Uncle Ford, with flying colors. Unfortunately for them (and for Stan), Ford knows how to fight back. 1720 words

Miraculous Ladybug

(’20) Tickletober Day 15 - Stuck - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Adrien, Ler!Marinette - Thanks to a little yo-yo malfunction, Ladybug finds out something very interesting about her partner. 989 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 17 - Revenge - [ao3] - Gen - Switch!Marinette, Switch!Adrien - In Marinette’s humble opinion, this was one of the most ridiculous scenarios she could imagine them finding out each other’s identities. 799 words

Sanders Sides(/Cartoon Therapy)

High School AU

Still Got It - [ao3] - Prinxiety - Lee!Virgil/Ler!Roman - Roman is frustrated that he’s never heard Virgil laugh. Logan presents a solution. Turns out, after all these years, Virgil is still ticklish. 2350 words

You Brought The Laughter Back - [ao3] - Prinxiety - Lee!Roman/Ler!Virgil - Virgil may not have the experience Roman has, but his fingers definitely work magic, if Roman’s reactions are anything to go by. 2170 words

I’m Not Ticklish - [ao3] - Logince - Lee!Logan/Ler!Roman - Logan has had a thing for tickling as long as he could remember, and he’s rather good at hiding it. It only takes one slip-up for Roman to find out and make his fantasies come true. 5588 words

Calorie Counting - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Patton - Roman is struggling with his new system of trying to lose weight. Luckily, Patton is always there for him. 1496 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 1 - Feather - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Patton, Roman, Virgil - Someone’s been sneak-tickling Logan, and he’s determined to find out who. 727 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 2 - Fingers - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Patton - Logan is ever so rudely awoken from his nap. 278 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 3 - Unusual Spots - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Roman - Roman finds a rather unusual method of warming his hands, leading to the discovery of a rather unusual spot for Patton to be ticklish. 278 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 4 - Stocks - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Logan - Roman agreed to help Logan with some of his “experiments.” He would never admit how much he loved it. 864 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 5 - Tools - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Logan - It’s Virgil’s turn to help with an experiment, and he’s getting a little impatient waiting for what he truly wants. 684 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 6 - Gang Tickling - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Logan, Roman, Patton - Virgil’s been in a certain kind of mood for a number of days, now. It’s a shame no one’s noticed enough to take advantage of it. 674 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 7 - Light Tickles - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil -Logan isn’t sleeping. Again. Luckily, Virgil has a remedy. 461 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 8 - Hard Tickles - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Logan - Patton really wants to be wrecked. Logan is happy to oblige. 455 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 9 - “I’m not ticklish” - [ao3] - Prinxiety - Lee!Roman/Ler!Virgil - Roman insists he’s not ticklish. Virgil insists that’s impossible. What else is there to do except test it out? 446 word

(’19) Tickletober Day 10 - Arms Up - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Patton - Virgil did ask for this, after all. Now all he needed to do was actually hold out. 218 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 11 - Sneak Attack - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Logan - Patton is really much more sneaky than anyone gives him credit for. They really should start expecting it by this point. 233 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 12 - Unusual Tool - [ao3] - Royality - Lee!Patton/Ler!Roman - A not-so-peaceful moment together of doing chores leads to the discovery of a new possible tool of torment for Roman and Patton. 269 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 13 - Feet - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Virgil - Virgil can finally get his revenge on Patton for all the tickling, with the help of a few little piggies. 289 words

(’19) Tickletober 14 - Favorite Spot - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Roman, Patton, Logan - It was no secret that everyone in the mindpalace had their favorite spots, whether to tickle or be tickled. The rare thing was that, for one specific side, the favorite for everyone was unanimous. 194 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 15 - Cuddles - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil, Patton, Roman - Logan’s been overworking himself and refuses to relax, even when everyone forces him to take a break. Luckily, his fellow sides know just what to do. 661 words

Work of Art - [ao3] - Logince - Lee!Logan/Ler!Roman - Roman just really wants to paint on his super attractive boyfriend. Logan, surprisingly (or not so surprisingly), is very willing. 1357 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 16 - Tickly Kiss - [ao3] - Moxiety - Lee!Patton/Ler!Virgil - Patton’s having one of his “bad for no reason” days. Luckily, Virgil always seems to know what to do. 578 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 17 - Tickle Fight - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Roman, Virgil, Patton - Virgil wasn’t sure how it started, but he was going to try his hardest not to lose. 211 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 18 - Chase - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Patton, Virgil, Logan - Roman may have wanted it, but he certainly wasn’t going to make it easy for them. 194 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 19 - Stuck - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Patton - Roman probably should’ve thought this through before he did it… 242 words

Hysterical series

(’19) Tickletober Day 20 - Hysterical - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil - It’s Virgil’s turn to experiment. He wants to know what it takes to make Logan hysterical. 343 words

Broken Logic - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil - Logan had done enough ticklish “experiments” on the others to know that they would be ruthless in their revenge, but truly? He wasn’t complaining. And he certainly wasn’t complaining when he heard Virgil’s threat to absolutely break him. 2689 words

The Attack of the Garra Rufa - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Roman - Roman recently acquired a new spellbook and he is very excited to test out the new spells inside. 712 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 21 - Accidental - [ao3] - Logicality - Lee!Patton/Ler!Logan - Logan didn’t mean to brush against Patton’s side, but he definitely didn’t expect the reaction it produced. What did Patton expect him to do when he realized the mind palace’s tickle monster was ticklish? NOT tickle him? 642 words

(’19) Tickletober Day 22 - Tickly Massage - [ao3] - Logince - Lee!Logan/Ler!Roman - Logan’s been overworking again, which was causing his back pain to flare up again. Roman comes by to make sure he has a break. 994 words

We’ll Be Here, Always - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Logan, Virgil, Roman - Patton can’t always be happy, as much as he loathed to admit it. Sometimes he had bad days. Sometimes, those bad days had no rhyme or reason or cause. Luckily, his family’s always there to support him. 5039 words

Could Use a Laugh - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Patton - Patton’s got his hands on Roman’s new spell book. He can’t wait to put it to use! His first target? A grumpy little side who could use a little more laughter in his life. 1063 words

The Prettiest Monster - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Virgil - All Roman wanted was to teach Patton makeup. He didn’t expect to be playfully attacked in response. 1054 words

Feathery Feet - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Roman - Roman has decided it’s his turn to play with his new tickle spells on the mind palace’s favorite emo. 664 words

Revenge is a Dish Best Served Bright - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Logan - Logan knows that Patton is plotting on coming for him next with those silly new spells. He figures the best way to counter that is by getting him first. 892 words

It’s Christmas, Wake Up! - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Roman, Logan, Ler!Patton - Patton thinks his fellow sides are taking a little too long to wake up, and he’s ready to start the day’s festivities. Luckily, he has the perfect idea for getting them out of bed. 1224 words

Even Santa’s Elves Need Naps - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Roman - Patton’s been attempting to take on the monumental task of planning and setting up Christmas all on his own. Roman has decided he needs a break, and maybe a good laugh. 751 words

Dancing Around the Issue - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Logan - They were supposed to be rehearsing. It wasn’t Roman’s fault he was so ticklish. 1665 words

The Featherswords series

Prince Feathersword - [ao3] - Logince - Lee!Logan, Patton, Virgil, Ler!Roman - Roman’s been on a bit of a nostalgia binge, recently, and couldn’t help but remember a special sword a certain tickly pirate had… 3878 words

Professor Feathersword - [ao3] - Logince - Lee!Roman/Ler!Logan - Roman didn’t expect revenge, but he wasn’t necessarily complaining. 2107 words

The Tickle Monster Always Wins - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Patton - Roman really shouldn’t have doubted Patton’s skills as a ruthless tickle monster. He was really in for it, now. 3220 words

Content (Valentickle) - [ao3] - Prinxiety - Switch!Virgil/Switch!Roman - It was meant to be some cuddling after a Valentines Day well-spent. Not that either of them were complaining with the playful turn things had taken. 1605 words

Kitten’s Got Claws - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil - Virgil’s suspicious of Logan’s motives now that he’s started using Roman’s tickle spellbook as well. He figures he might as well be proactive and get the nerd, first. 895 words

Giddy Kisses - [ao3] - Logince - Lee!Logan/Ler!Roman - Roman has a quite the sweet gift for Logan. It’s not his fault his boyfriend is so ticklish. 599 words

Scooch - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Roman - The couch may be a comfortable place for a nap, but Virgil is sorely mistaken if he thinks he’ll be able to commandeer it for long. 401 words

Joyful Noise - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Logan, Roman, Patton - Virgil tiredly lets something slip on his Christmas list, but it doesn’t turn out as bad as he fears. 1222 words

Cold Fingers, Warm Laughter - [ao3] - LAMP - Switch!Virgil, Logan, Roman, Patton - Maybe Patton was right and Roman should’ve worn gloves during their snowball fight, but was that going to stop him from starting something? Absolutely not. 1109 words

Color By Tickles - [ao3] - Gen - Ler!Virgil, Lee!Roman - Virgil was feeling more confident with these spells, now. Meaning it was the perfect time for revenge on a certain Prince they all knew. 961 words

Connected - [ao3] - Gen - Ler!Logan, Lee!Virgil - What, did Virgil think that Logan wouldn’t get revenge? 596 words

Fluttery Feelings series

Fluttery Feelings - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Magic(?) - Roman had planned the perfect prank for movie night. He just really hadn’t anticipated it backfiring on him. 2229 words

Fluttery Feelings 2: Helpless Revenge - [ao3] - Gen, Lee!Virgil, Patton, Logan, Ler!Roman - Roman had the perfect prank planned for movie night. This time, he would make sure it didn't backfire. 419 words

Provoked - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Logan - Patton should have known to provoke Logan so far, but really, maybe that was exactly what he’d wanted all along. 967 words

TacTickle Advantage - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Patton - Virgil should know better than to accept a challenge from Patton when he has that devious grin on his face. 716 words

Distraction - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Emile, Ler!Remy - Emile slips up and gets a bruise. Remy has just the thing to distract him from the pain. 512 words

So Close - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Roman, Virgil, Patton - Logan was so close to winning the bet, all he had to do was not laugh for another five minutes and he would be in the clear. Of course, it was at that moment Patton had to drop the secret to one of his biggest weaknesses. 945 words

Asking for Attention - [ao3] - Prinxiety - Lee!Roman/Ler!Virgil - Roman’s been pulling pranks all day. Virgil knows what he’s really after. 509 words

Patty-Lee - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Roman, Virgil, Logan - Patton’s in a dangerous ler mood, but the others decide it’s high time he got a taste of his own medicine. 1137 words

Learn Your Lesson - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Virgil - Patton should’ve known better than to go after Virgil alone. Now he was really in for it. 1181 words

“Feared” Ler - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Patton, Logan, Ler!Virgil - When Virgil gave you that grin, you knew to submit yourself to your fate. 1660 words

Get Up - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Patton - Patton just wants to get up and have breakfast! Roman, unfortunately, is being a little stubborn. 1076 words

Changing Channels - [ao3] - Gen - Switch!Logan, Switch!Virgil - Virgil’s sick of Logan’s documentary, but he’s not exactly keen on changing the channel. Needless to say, a playful little fight breaks out. 846 words

Dance if You Can - [ao3] - Prinxiety - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Roman - Roman held the unofficial title of “Best Dancer” whenever their friend group played Just Dance. Virgil, the new addition, was about to show him how it’s done, but Roman was nothing if not competitive. 2975 words

Broken Rules - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Patton - Virgil knew the consequences if he broke the rules of the challenge, he really did. And yet, here Patton was, needing to give him his “punishment.” Maybe it wasn’t a punishment at all, based off Virgil’s reactions. 702 words

Helpful - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil - Logan’s neck has been hurting him. Virgil’s only trying to help. 551 words

Prince Gigglee - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Virgil, Patton, Logan - Roman’s in a very giggly mood. Logan finally figures out why. 1021 words

Not So Fast - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Logan - Virgil isn’t quite as sneaky as he thinks he is, asking for something indirectly. 634 words

Let’s Hang Out - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Logan - If Roman was going to (albeit accidentally) ignore him, then Virgil was going to ignore Roman right back. He just didn’t expect the consequences that followed. 2085 words

Shark Attack - [ao3] - Gen - Switch!Virgil, Switch!Logan - Logan and Virgil are together again for summer break, and Virgil decides he’d like to play one of their childhood games to reminisce. 1210 words

Countdown - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Logan, Patton, Ler!Roman - Roman has a favorite game he likes to play with the other Sides. While most of them would never admit it, they like playing it with him, too. 1085 words

Bedtime - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, LerLogan - Patton is refusing to go to bed, but Logan has a few tricks up his sleeves. 685 words

If You Do… - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Virgil - Roman had asked Virgil to do his makeup, but he hadn’t anticipated how much the makeup brushes would tickle. 536 words

Bonding Exercises - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Emile - Emile thinks that he and Virgil need to bond, and he has the perfect idea as to how. 699 words

Better Than Coffee - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil - All Virgil had really been after was a hug. It wasn’t his fault Logan was so sensitive. 280 words

Losses and Laughter - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil - Really, Logan should’ve known better than to make that bet. But was it really the worst way to lose? 332 words

Tricks and Teases - [ao3] - Analogical - Switch!Virgil/Switch!Logan - Logan had been planning to tickle his boyfriend silly. Not have it go the other way around. 548 words

Instincts - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Roman - It wasn’t Patton’s fault he squirmed so much at even the threat of being tickled! 316 words

Delicious Laughter - [ao3] - Logicality - Lee!Patton/Ler!Logan - Patton had the perfect plan set out to get Logan to tickle him. Logan just happened to go a little off script. 425 words

Fall of the Fortress - [ao3] - Logicality - Switch!Patton/Switch!Logan - Really, all Patton had wanted to do was cuddle. But when a tickle war was started? He was not going to go down without a fight. 733 words

Bully - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Logan - Logan’s been teasing Roman all day, and he really hopes there’s a laughter-filled payout after all this. 400 words

Begging For Lies - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Roman - Virgil should’ve known better than to provoke Roman, seeing how ruthless he could be. But maybe that was exactly what Virgil was counting on. 469 words

Cookie Monster - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Virgil - Virgil helps Patton pass the time until his cookies are done. 560 words

Dr. Monster, M.D. - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Roman - Well, if Logan thought his ideas were too fantastical and unrealistic, Roman would just have to use that against him, wouldn’t he? 458 words

Please? - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Virgil - Virgil isn’t normally so bold, but with Roman looking at him like that, how could he resist? 390 words

Noisy Giggles - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Patton - Patton had no idea that vocal cords could tickle someone so well. 503 words

Learn to Lie - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Virgil - Virgil just wants his makeup back. If only Roman would own up to his thievery. 425 words

It’s Okay to Laugh - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Virgil - During some late-night bonding, Virgil decides to help Logan loosen up a bit. 586 words

Cuddle Time - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Patton - Patton’s in the mood to cuddle. 202 words

Strange Spot - [ao3] - Remile - Lee!Remy/Ler!Emile - Emile makes a fun discovery about Remy. 265 words

Glittery Giggles - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Logan - Logan thinks he deserves some payback after Roman’s latest prank. 522 words

Lazy Day by Law - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Roman - Roman’s made it his job to make sure Patton obey’s the laws of “Lazy Day.“ 425 words

Problem Solving - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Logan - After a long day of Roman being purposefully irritable, Logan finally finds out the reason. What kind of friend would he be if he didn’t help Roman out? 537 words

The Labyrinth - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Roman, Ler!Patton - When Roman finds himself in a certain kind of mood, he knows who to ask. 677 words

Bready or Not - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Roman - Logan should’ve known that Roman noticed his moods. At least he was willing to help out. 795 words

Anywhere? - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Logan, Ler!Patton - Logan’s managed to avoid Patton’s tickle-monster rampage for this long. Will he be able to hold out? 182 words

Cuteness Quota - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Virgil, Ler!Patton - Patton never missed an opportunity to make Virgil smile.133 words

As Long As We Need - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Logan - Patton really didn’t know what he was getting into when he agreed to help with one of Logan’s experiments. He found that he really didn’t mind. 247 words

Sugar Sweet - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Patton, Ler!Roman - Patton’s run out of ingredients for his cookies. Luckily, Roman has something even sweeter in mind. 206 words

Shadowhunters (TV)

Your Lips Create a Symphony - [ao3] - Malec - Lee!Alec/Ler!Magnus - Early on in their relationship, Magnus makes a little discovery while he and Alec are making out. He exploits this weakness to the fullest. 2236 words

Late Night Discoveries - [ao3] - Malec - Lee!Magnus/Ler!Alec - Alec makes a little discovery in his efforts to get Magnus to sleep. He takes full advantage of it in the morning. 1320 words

Star Trek: The Next Generation

(’20) Tickletober Day 5 - Drawn On - [ao3] - DaForge - Lee!Geordi/Ler!Data - Data had only wanted to experiment with a new form of art, Geordi couldn’t fault Data for his own sensitivity interrupting them. 674 words

Star Trek: The Original Series

(’20) Tickletober Day 14 - Light Tickles - [ao3] - Spirk - Lee!Spock/Ler!Jim - In a quiet moment, Jim discovers something new about Spock. 961 words

Energy Well-Spent - [ao3] - Spirk - Lee!Spock/Ler!Jim - Jim is determined to show Spock the perks of doing things the human way. 694 words

Liar, Liar - [ao3] - Gen - Switch!Bones, Scotty - The tranquilizer's got Scotty and Bones feeling a bit silly. 602 words

Demonstration - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Uhura, Ler!Spock - Perhaps Uhura should know better than to tease Spock, but it's just too much fun. 685 words

Supernatural

(’20) Tickletober Day 12 - Hard Tickles - [ao3] - Destiel - Switch!Dean/Switch!Castiel - Dean should know better than to start a tickle fight with an angel. 349 words

The Adventure Zone: Amnesty

How to Ask - [ao3] - Danbrey - Lee!Aubrey/Ler!Dani - Aubrey's been craving some playful affection lately, but there's no way she can just ASK for it. No, this requires a plan. 1135 words

I’m Not Scared - [ao3] - Danbrey - Lee!Aubrey/Ler!Dani - Aubrey and Dani want to try something new, despite their nerves. Dani happens to make a new discovery in the process. 1305 words

The Adventure Zone: Balance

Touch - [ao3] - Taakitz - Lee!Taako/Ler!Kravitz - Touch and Taako have always had an interesting relationship, but it was time he started figuring it out with this new world, since they seemed to be sticking around. 2349 words

Not-So-Silent Treatment - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Taako, Ler!Magnus - When Taako decides to give Magnus the silent treatment, he decides that that just won’t do. 324 words

Taaco Fight - [ao3] - Gen - Switch!Lup, Switch!Taako - Tickle fights aren’t exactly an uncommon occurrence between the twins. 346 words

Need Something? - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Taako, Ler!Lucretia - Taako is the type to annoy people until he gets what he wants. Lucretia isn’t the type to take that sort of behavior. 484 words

Attention and Affection - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Taako, Ler!Magnus - Magnus knows exactly how to deal with Taako when he’s looking for attention. 418 words

Don’t Stop - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Taako, Ler!Magnus - It wasn’t the response Magnus was expecting from Taako, but who was he to deny such a request? 301 words

Sore Loser - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Taako, Ler!Lup - Taako lost the bet, and now he had to deal with the consequences. 460 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 8 - Interrogation - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Magnus, Ler!Taako - Taako’s hat is missing and he’s going to find the culprit, no matter what it takes. 707 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 11 - Death Spot - [ao3] - Taakitz - Lee!Kravitz/Ler!Taako - Kravitz had long know Taako’s death spot, having found it far too easily. Taako has to work a bit harder to find Kravitz’s. 1096 words

His Impatient Song - [ao3] - Taakitz - Lee!Kravitz/Ler!Taako - Taako thought this was meant to be a romantic night, and so far Kravitz had done everything right. So why was he now fiddling with something in the corner, ignoring Taako entirely? 403 words

Dr. Magnus Will See You Now - [ao3] - Gen - Lee!Taako, Ler!Magnus - Taako's been hiding an injury, but Magnus is determined to convince Taako to get it healed. 683 words

Cold Hands, Warm Hearts - [ao3] - Taakitz - Lee!Taako/Ler!Kravitz - Taako would love nothing more than to cuddle close with his boyfriend. Unfortunately, the heat of the kitchen and the chill of Kravitz’s hands don’t quite mix. Kravitz doesn’t intend to give up so easily. 1736 words

Witcher

Like It series

You Like It - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Jaskier/Ler!Geralt - For a man who claims to know what tickling is “in theory,” Geralt certainly has a lot of questions. He might even require a demonstration. 2018 words

Maybe I Like It, Too - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - Jaskier knew that everyone had to be at least a little ticklish somewhere, and he wasn’t going to give up until he had Geralt laughing underneath him. 3239 words

We Like It - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Jaskier/Ler!Geralt - Geralt wants to test out a few things that Jaskier showed him the other day, and it just so happens that he's decided to make Jaskier his test subject. 1975 words

Just Let Go - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - Geralt would never admit it out loud, but he quite enjoys the touches that Jaskier blesses him with. And then Jaskier figures out that he’s sensitive to a different kind of touch. 1470 words

Fresh Discoveries - [ao3] - Geraskier - Switch!Geralt, Switch!Jaskier - Jaskier makes a rather interesting discovery while helping Geralt during one of his baths. 617 words

Get His Attention - [ao3] - Geraskier - Switch!Jaskier/Switch!Geralt - Jaskier was determined to get Geralt’s attention, no matter what it took. 905 words

Wake-Up Call - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Jaskier/Ler!Geralt - Geralt is awake and ready to go, now the only issue is getting Jaskier up. 819 words

Beauty in Strength - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - Jaskier’s found a new game: brushing against scars and asking after them. If only it wasn’t so ticklish when he did so. 2271 words

Snickers and Snorts - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - It was one of Jaskier’s favorite games to play, “How Long Until the Big Bad Witcher Admits He’s Ticklish.” As of yet, Jaskier hadn’t technically won, but that didn’t mean he was going to give up. 1119 words

Dissonance - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - Geralt thought that Jaskier should know better than to annoy him. Jaskier proved to him that Geralt should know better than to provoke him. 906 words

Does This Tickle? - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - Jaskier insists that he’s not that ticklish. Geralt proves otherwise. 599 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 2 - Feathers - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Jaskier/LerGeralt - Jaskier seems to have misplaced his quill. He finds himself in a rather ticklish position once Geralt finds it. 1663 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 4 - Spidering - [ao3] - Geraskier - Switch!Geralt/Switch!Jaskier - Geralt is not nearly as amused with Jaskier’s Halloween decorations as Jaskier thinks he should be. 1216 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 6 - Kiss - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - Geralt’s a bit weird about having his neck touched. Turns out, it wasn’t for the reasons Jaskier thought. 1863 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 7 - Unusual Tool - [ao3] - Geraskier - Switch!Geralt/Switch!Jaskier - Jaskier’s impulse-buy leads to a rather giggly evening, in the Rivia-Pankratz household. 854 words

(’20) Tickletober Day 10 - Feet - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Jaskier/Ler!Geralt - Jaskier’s complaining about the roughness of Geralt’s feet, so Geralt gives him something else to complain about. 317 words

Swearing Off Sewers - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - After a nasty fight with a zeugl, Jaskier tries to help Geralt wash the stench of the sewers off. Unfortunately, Geralt is a little too sensitive for that. 1693 words

Lazy Days and Late Mornings - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Jaskier/Ler!Geralt - Jaskier wants to stay in bed. Geralt thinks it's time to get up. 788 words

Shut Up, Bard - [ao3] - Gen/Geraskier - Lee!Jaskier, Ler!Geralt, Lambert, Eskel - Jaskier causes a little too much annoyance, and the witchers decide it's about time they took him down a peg. 682 words

Habit - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Jaskier/Ler!Geralt - Jaskier has a little habit of tickling Geralt whenever the urge strikes. Geralt seems to have finally hit his breaking point, ready for revenge. 1657 words

Certain Sensitivities - [ao3] - Geraskier - Lee!Geralt/Ler!Jaskier - Geralt accidentally finds himself drenched in a very potent sensitivity potion. Unfortunately, attempts to neutralize the effects prove to be rather... ticklish. 809 words

#tickle fic #masterpost #atla tickling #bnha tickling #dbh tickling #carry on tickling #gravity falls tickling #miraculous ladybug tickling #shadowhunters tickling #sanders sides tickling #star trek tickling #taz tickling #the witcher tickling

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toothpastecanyon · 3 years

Text

A Name From the Mailbox, Chapter 4

Dipper finds out the author's name before Not What He Seems. It's not the person he expected.

See most updated version on Archive of Our Own.

______________________________________________________________

“The end times?”

The ride home had been strange so far. Dipper and Mabel exchanged glances before looking back at the old man sitting between them.

“There’s a doomsday device under Gravity Falls?” Dipper made a face. “No offense, but is this, uh, like the Gobblewonker situation?”

“It’s real! Look at these gravitational readings, kid!” He gestured at a matrix of numbers on the screen. “Waves of anomalies! And once it activates - you best be holding onto something, cause you’ll start floating up!”

Soos looked back. “Whoa. That sounds pretty cool, dude.”

“It’s not cool! It’s tearing a hole in our universe!”

“Aww.”

“Okay, okay, calm down,” Dipper raised a hand. “We can shut it down, right? Where is it?”

“Ohhh… I used to know, I don’t recall!”

“Maybe it’s in that old bunker?” Mabel sat forward. “We should go back there!”

“Maybe…” He frowned. “After the Shack, yeah.”

At that moment, Soos turned into the parking lot. Mabel’s frown deepened.

“Why after?”

“We’re already here, right? It’ll just take a second.” Dipper opened the door and jumped out. He held it for McGucket, and raised an eyebrow when Mabel remained in the car. “Mabel? Come on!”

“We should find the bunker, Dipper.”

“Yeah, we will, just-”

“We should go look for the bunker, now.” Mabel crossed her arms. “We just got told there’s a big scary thing that’s gonna end the world and you still want to look for Stan stuff? He’s not gonna know about a doomsday thingy.”

“Well, we don’t know that-”

“Dipper.”

Mabel was looking at him with a very knowing expression. He took one look at it, and then sighed.

“Well… if Stan’s the Author, he’s gotta know where it’ll be, right? He probably built it.” He watched Mabel raise her eyebrows. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

Because I don’t think Grunkle Stan’s the Author, Dipper.” She pulled her hands into her sleeves. “You know that, right?”

Dipper hesitated. He looked back towards the house; Soos was opening the side door. “I mean, it’s very possible. And we’re already here, we might as well-”

Mabel got out of the car and pushed past him without a word. He frowned and hurried to catch up with her.

“Come on, Mabel. Don’t be like that.” A pause. “I don’t think it’d be in the bunker anyways. We looked all over that place.”

“Hey, dude!” Soos waved him over. “What are we looking for? I forgot.”

“It’s…” Dipper glanced one more time at Mabel, then jogged forwards. “It’s a big stack of papers, it should be in the living room. Come on.”

They entered the kitchen, and Dipper suddenly froze - was Stan back? He listened for a couple seconds, but the house was silent… eerily silent. They headed into the living room and were greeted by an empty chair - and no thesis, no picture to show Fiddleford.

“Of course,” Dipper frowned. “Stan must’ve put them somewhere.”

“...What is this place?”

A strange question - he glanced over, and found McGucket looking around the room.

“Oh, it’s just our house,” he said, and then cleared his throat. “I bet he still has it somewhere. Soos, you know where he hides stuff, right?”

“Yeah… he says I’m supposed to keep them secret, though. Like the money under the squeaky step on the stairs, the arrest warrants under the rug in the gift shop…” He counted them off with his fingers. “The wallets in the Sascrotch…”

“Okay, cool, you can take the gift shop.” Dipper looked over at McGucket. “And, uh, take him too, I guess. Mabel and I- oh, you know where it might be? His office, we’ll go there.”

“Okay,” said Mabel. He cringed a bit at her tone, but continued.

“Alright, if we find it, we can meet back up. It’ll be hard to miss, it’s like a giant stack of paper, and it’ll have Stan’s picture on top.”

“Got it, dude.” Soos shot finger guns at him as he backed away. “Come on, McGucket, it’s this way.”

The two of them shuffled out of sight, and Dipper nodded to Mabel.

“Alright, let’s, uh, go.”

“Yeah, to the office.”

Mabel turned and started walking to the back. He trailed along behind her.

“Yeah, it’ll just be quick,” he said. Paused. Then: “It’s worth checking out. I mean, you saw the same stuff I saw. It’s not at least a little weird to you that he’s got a whole PhD on anomalous events even though he never-”

“Yeah, Dipper, you told me already.”

“Then why doesn’t it make sense to check it out?” He opened the door to the office. “If he’s not the author, then we can just go to the next thing, right?”

Mabel snorted. “Oh yeah, and you’re totally ready to let this go. I know you, dum dum. You’re gonna spend the rest of the summer obsessing about this, and not in a fun way. In the ‘arguing with Grunkle Stan every night’ way.”

“Well… well, it’s weird, isn’t it? Stan is hiding something.” He made a beeline for the paper shredder, and picked it up. “Look, look! This thing’s stuffed - ugh, I bet he shredded it! Now why do you think he’d do that?”

“I dunno?” Mabel poked at the paper copier. “Hey, do you remember that dance party we had? Maybe we could ask Grunkle Stan to throw another one!”

“Oh, that? Oh, that…” He started going through the papers scattered around the desk. “I remember that. I didn’t really get to spend a lot of time at it, I was, uh…”

“Trying to nerd your way into dancing with Wendy?”

“Yeah, yeah... Mabel, look!” He grabbed a piece of paper. “There’s one page he didn’t shred for some reason - and it’s the one with his picture! Yes!” He flipped it over to show her. “Look, it is him, right down to the glasses! And he’s building the Mystery Shack - tell me that’s not him!”

Mabel frowned at the photo. She started to open her mouth, but-

There was a sound. A yell. A cry. Both of them locked eyes, and without a word they ran for the gift shop.

“Are you guys okay?” Dipper said as he burst through the door. The first thing he saw was McGucket, on the floor, trembling. “McGucket?”

“I seen it!” McGucket stabbed a finger at - the vending machine? “I seen it, right down there! It’s there!”

“What’s here?” Mabel tried to help him up, but he scrambled away. “What’s wrong?”

“The machine… my mind… I’m not going down there again! You can’t make me!”

Then he bolted for the door. Soos tried to grab him, but he was gone in a flash, the door slamming shut behind him. Dipper blinked, and then looked to Soos.

“Uh… what happened?”

“I dunno, dude! One minute he was fine, I turn around and suddenly he’s freaking out!” Soos picked up a case on the counter. “He left his laptop, too.”

“Weird.” Mabel took it from him. “What do you think he saw? Dipper?”

Dipper wasn’t right beside her. He had walked a couple paces forward, towards the vending machine.

“Dipper?”

It looked normal, mundane. He couldn’t count the number of times he’d passed by this thing without sparing it a second glance. There was nothing really to draw the eye; no flashy colours, no display lights on the snacks, no attempt from Stan to dress it up as any sort of attraction. It was maybe the most normal looking thing in the gift shop, but…

He reached out. Felt the sides. There was decades’ worth of grime caught between the metal edge and the wooden wall, but as his fingers slid down, they came across something - a bump?

He looked.

A hinge.

______________________________________________________________

Shit. Shit, shit. Did he lose them?

Heart beating in his chest, Stan slowly raised himself up, and looked out the side of the van he was driving. Through the cracks in the grass, he could see lights from the highway silhouetting the trees he looked through. White lights - no red and blue, though it was harder to tell with the feds.

He grit his teeth, and forced his shoulders down. It had been quiet for a while. If they were gonna find him here, they would’ve done it by now.

“Alright, Stan,” he grunted. Opened the door. “Hard part’s done. Now I just need to get it home.”

He rubbed his forehead as he got out of the van; there was a split in it that had stopped bleeding not that long ago. He cast one look to the front, to the smoking engine crumpled into the side of a thick trunk, and limped his way to the back - past the side of the van that read ‘OFFICIAL WASTE DISPOSAL VEHICLE’ in large letters. He unlatched the rear doors, opened them, and shone a flashlight inside.

There was the shine of several metal cylinders. One of them had flown up a little in the collision and was resting sideways on the others. It looked like it had a pretty bad dent in it, but nothing looked to be leaking out; not noticeably, at least.

“Hmph.” He nodded a little. “I can work with this. Alright.”

There was a tarp and a couple construction signs thrown about the back; he covered the van, set up a few signs to keep away curious onlookers, then started off through the forest. It slow and dark, but, as he checked his watch, not dark for too much longer. The kids’d be up if he took too long, so he groaned and forced himself to walk a little faster.

Shouldn’t’ve tried to rush this job, he thought. Should’ve learned his lesson from Columbia. If the feds weren’t onto him before, they sure were now. Maybe he should get out of town for a bit, take the kids on a little road trip…

He made a face. Miss the portal opening, probably. Thirty years of work, and he might not even be there to see it pay off.

There was a tug and a ripping sound as his pantlegs brushed past a thorny bush, and he swore under his breath.

“Great. Just great.” Finally he trudged his way out onto the Shack’s parking lot. “Alright, focus. Gotta work quickly.”

Stan grabbed some supplies stashed by the outhouse and loaded them into his car. He put the seats back, started it, and drove right back to where he’d hit the trees; for once he was driving carefully, following the speed limit. Once he saw the flash of construction signs down in the forest, he turned off his headlights and drove slowly down to the van.

There, he stopped. Pulled the tarp off. The words emblazoned across the sides of the van were really gonna catch the eye of whoever found this thing; he took a can of spraypaint and quickly covered them, paused, and then replaced it with ‘PROPERTY OF TENT OF TELEPATHY’ After that, he opened the back and loaded as many drums of waste into his car that he could. When he ran out of space, he wrapped two in the tarp and tied them to the roof.

Stan tightened them one last time, and stepped back to catch his breath.

There. Now all he had to do was get home.

The sky was just barely beginning to lighten as Stan pulled back into the Mystery Shack. He pulled off his gloves as he made his way toward the gift shop, opened the door, and walked towards the vending machine.

Something did catch his eye, though. There was something on the register with a little red light; he picked it up, and immediately he could feel it was a little camera… A camera that was currently recording. Stan frowned at that, and looked up, up to the vending machine it was pointed at.

He had a bad feeling about this. And a second later when he heard a strange creak from the corner of the gift shop, he reached down, grasped the baseball bat leaning against the side of the counter, and made his way to the sound.

He stepped silently, avoiding the squeaky floorboards. There was definitely a figure in the corner, but… smaller than he was expecting. It didn’t look like an agent, actually, it looked more like…

“Kid?”

Dipper squinted when the flashlight came on. Stan breathed a sigh of relief - yup, it was just him - before a new fear started churning his stomach.

“What are you doing here kid? It’s late, you should be in bed!” He shone the flashlight lower. “Are those IDs? Did you go rooting through my room?”

“It is late. Where have you been, Grunkle Stan?”

Stan glanced back to his car. He really didn’t have time for this.

“And what happened to your face?”

“Eh… woodpecker.” Stan motioned him up. “Cmon, kid, off to bed with you. Your parents’d kill me if they found out how late you’re up.”

“Since when have you cared about how late we stay up?”

“Since right now, kid, so-“

“No!” Dipper crossed his arms, and there was a strange shine in his eyes. “What’s wrong with me sitting here? In this room?”

“Dipper.”

“You’re hiding something, aren’t you!”

“Dipper, you’re trying my patience.” He glanced back again. “Look, how about I cut you a deal. You go to bed, tomorrow we can have a proper talk about this, alright?”

“What, so you can tell me more about how you aren’t the Author?” He rose to his feet. “You know, ‘Stan’, at first I thought you weren’t telling me because you wanted to ‘protect me’ or whatever, but now I know what you’re up to. McGucket, he saw what the machine was gonna do to the world, but you kept going, didn’t you?”

“McGucket? What?”

“It’s too late to play dumb, Stan! I know what you’re really hiding. There’s a doomsday machine under the Mystery Shack!”

Stan heard that, and the first thing that came out of his mouth was a startled snort. “What?” He managed. “You spent this whole time trying to figure me out, and you came up with that?”

But the look in his eyes… wow, he was serious about this, wasn’t he?

“You really think I’m building a doomsday machine?” Stan laughed again, but it rang hollow against Dipper’s unsmiling expression. “Have a little faith in me, kid, come on. I’m not trying to end the world.”

“You’re lying.” He said, trying to puff out his chest. “And I’m not gonna let you do this. I’m gonna stop you.”

At that, Stan let out a deep sigh. He looked up at the first morning rays peeking through the blinders, and then back at his nephew.

“Go to bed, kid.”

“No. I’m gonna stay here, I’m- hey!”

In one move, Stan picked him up and hoisted him over his shoulder. He started towards the back, wincing a bit as Dipper pounded on his shoulder.

“Let me go, Grunkle Stan! Let me go!”

Up the stairs. Dipper tried to wiggle out of his grip, but he held him firmly in place.

“You’ve just proved I’m right, you know! You’re not gonna get away with this!”

Stan made his way up to the attic, opened the door, and set dipper down in the bedroom. He blocked Dipper from squeezing past him as he started swinging it closed.

“Stan!”

“We’ll talk about this tomorrow. You get some rest.” As the gap narrowed, he saw the light landing on Mabel’s bed. She almost looked asleep, but he could see her staring back at him. “Night, kids.”

Then he shut the door, turned the lock… and after a second of hesitation he dragged a chair over and slotted it under the handle. A bit extreme, he thought, but the kid was smart. Tonight wasn’t the night to take chances.

Stan backed away, and started back down the steps.

He was so close, now. So close.

And no one was going to get in his way.

Hours later, when Dipper was slumped half-asleep against the door, he grunted at a strange light. It wasn’t like the sunlight; it was strangely blue, and as he bolted up and rubbed his eyes, he could see it shining up from between the floorboards.

Then he felt… strange. Light. He yelped as his feet suddenly left the ground, and suddenly everything in their bedroom was starting to float up, up; McGucket’s laptop, slowly spinning in the air, beeped and displayed a message that made his blood go cold:

MACHINE STATUS: ACTIVE

And then suddenly the weightlessness vanished, and he dropped back down, scrambled over to the laptop.

“Oh, no, no, no,” he said, his face lit red from warning signs. “Stan, what are you doing?”

#gravity falls #toothwrites #dipper pines #mabel pines #stan pines

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orangeoctopi7 · 3 years

Text

All of Your So-Called Problems

[AO3 link]

Stan was trying to find room for the leftover Mac and Cheese in the fridge when he heard the doorbell. He grumbled a few obscenities under his breath as he trudged towards the door. He was NOT in the mood for visitors tonight, even if they might be paying customers. The fact that a demon was trying to break into the house to steal some world-ending piece of junk from Ford didn’t help.

"We're closed!" He shouted before he even peeked out the window. He pulled back the blinds just enough to glare at whoever thought it was a good idea to drop by this late, and his eyebrows raised nearly to his receding hairline when he saw who it was.

"Wendy!? Since when do you knock?" Stan couldn't think of a single time she hadn't just come in and made herself at home since she'd started working at the Shack.

"Since Dipper told me you answered the door with a loaded gun earlier today." The teen answered as Stan opened the door.

"Gonna have to have a talk with that runt about blabbing." Stan rolled his eyes. "What, you having a movie night with the kids?"

"Not exactly." The teen jerked a thumb over her shoulder, and Stan finally noticed the rest of the Corduroy family standing just behind her, right off the porch. They were all carrying sleeping bags and pillows.

"...Wha?" Stan could only utter a surprised grunt as his brain tried to piece together why it looked like the entire Corduroy family was here for a sleepover.

"Dipper called me and said we could stay here until your brother puts up a barrier around our house." Wendy explained, noticing her boss's confusion. "...Aaand he never even told you anything about it, did he?"

"He sure didn't." Stan deadpanned.

As if on cue, Dipper and Ford both stepped into the entryway.

"Oh, Wendy, you're here already!" Dipper said, voice dripping with faked surprise. "I forgot to ask Grunkle Stan if it was ok for you guys to stay the night. But gosh, since you're already here, I guess we can't turn you away!"

"You can drop the act, bucko, I wrote the book on It's easier to ask forgiveness than permission." Stan folded his arms disapprovingly. "The answer's still no. We're already putting up one freeloader."

"I'm the one who said they could stay." Ford said firmly.

Stan turned his glare to his brother. "This isn't a safehouse, genius!"

"It's my house, Stanley!"

"Where are they even gonna sleep!?"

"Well, perhaps we'd have some place to put up guests if you hadn't turned the two largest rooms into a tourist trap!"

"Oh, like you kept the place ready for company when you lived here!" Stan countered. "These rooms were both filled to the brim with your weird experiments when I got here!"

“Hey, we can sleep outside like men, if it’s too much trouble to put us up!” Manly Dan interrupted the brothers’ argument.

“Unfortunately, that’s not an option.” Ford shook his head. “The barrier barely extends past the front porch.”

Ford quickly took a mental survey of where there might be extra room. The basement lab was out. He’d finished dismantling the portal, but he was storing the rift down there for now. His secret study was supposed to be a secret, and he still needed to clear out all that old Bill memorabilia. The attic was already taken by Dipper and Mabel. Stanley still had the main bedroom, and Fiddleford was currently sleeping on the couch in the upstairs study. That left the den, which might be large enough for one or two people, but certainly not a family of five. If only Stan hadn’t filled his old experiment and specimen rooms with useless junk! Sure, the rooms hadn’t exactly been empty before, but Ford at least would have known what things could be moved where to make room for their guests. Even his old thinking parlor was… wait…

“What about the parlor?” The old researcher asked.

Stan shrugged. “I kinda use it as a space for rotating exhibits, or whatever else I need at the time. Pretty sure it’s still full of leftover campaigning junk.”

“So, nothing we can’t throw out then.”

“Not so fast, genius, I still haven’t agreed to letting anyone stay here.”

“This is an emergency, Stanley!” Ford fumed. “And besides, it’s not your decision to make!”

Stan regarded the Corduroy family still standing awkwardly on his porch, and tried to imagine Manly Dan with those disturbing yellow eyes he’d seen on that time traveler earlier. He tried to picture the hulking lumberjack acting like that erratic demon. It was not a pleasant thought.

“Alright, fine.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “But only because I don’t want any of these ax-weidling giants possessed by a triangular serial-killer. And don’t expect me to provide any bedding or food!”

“Yeah, we can probably snare ourselves a few squirrels or something.” Wendy’s oldest brother assured Stan.

Stan grimaced. “On second thought, help yourselves to some canned meat. Only the stuff that’s expired though!”

“Thanks Stan.” Wendy said. “For giving us a place to stay until this blows over, not for the expired meat.”

“What? They pad that date out by at least a year. As long as it smells fine, it’s good to eat.” Stan defended himself.

The teen rolled her eyes but stepped into the Shack, followed by her family.

Ford observed them all carefully as they entered. No hesitation or sign of even noticing it as they crossed over the barrier. So they definitely weren’t possessed now. He would have to keep a close eye on them while they stayed. He knew that Dipper trusted Wendy, and that was good enough for him, for now, but the others? Ford vaguely remembered Dan from when he’d been a young man, building this very cabin for him. He’d been friendly, loud, and boisterous. It appeared his sons were cut from the same cloth. But it was hard to say whether or not Bill could convince any of them to try and smash the rift.

“So Wendy, did you manage to get more unicorn hair?” Dipper asked as he helped her lay out a sleeping bag in the parlor.

“Oh yeah. I just snuck into that glade again with a pair of shears and a tranq dart. Works just as well as fairy dust.” She handed a grocery bag full of rainbow hair to Ford.

Ford made a mental note to add that tidbit to the Journal 1 entry on unicorns later. “I’ll get started on it first thing tomorrow.”

Mabel came downstairs to help just a minute later. After a lot of rearranging of campaign signs and novelty phones, everyone had a sleeping space set out. Dan took Stan’s recliner in the den, and his youngest son set out a sleeping bag at his feet. The oldest three children laid out their sleeping bags between the piles of junk in the parlor.

“Ohmigosh, Dipper, we should pull our mattresses down here and have a mega-sleepover!” Mabel gasped as she pushed the last of the campaign signs into a corner.

“What was the point of clearing out all this junk if we aren’t even gonna sleep in our own beds?” Dipper asked tiredly.

“Hmm, good point. Maybe Barry and Stuart can sleep in our beds, and we can sleep down here with Wendy!”

Dipper and Wendy’s middle brother both blushed beet red.

“Uh… I mean… I, uh, I don’t think Wendy would want to sleep with me--US! With us!” Dipper stammered.

“M-me? Sleep in a g-girl’s room? Like a room that a girl sleeps in?” The middle brother gulped.

“Yyyeah, I think we’re good where we are.” Wendy said cooly, trying to diffuse the awkward tension in the room.

“Aw man!” Mabel pouted, but she didn’t put up any other protest than that. Dipper suspected she was still pretty worn out from the rescue mission this morning.

Eventually, everyone got settled down and the children all fell asleep. The elder Pines twins moved back to the living room to check on Dan one more time.

"Hey, now that the kids are asleep, I've been meaning to ask you something." The lumberjack said in a low rumble that was probably his version of a whisper. "How long have there been two of you?"

"Hooboy…" Stan pinched the bridge of his nose. He really didn't want to retread this again.

"I'm Stanford. I'm the one you first met when you built this place for me. My brother Stanley has been living here under my name for the last 30 years." Ford summarized tiredly. Apparently he wasn't in the mood to make a big deal out of it right now either.

Stan could practically see the gears turning in Manly Dan's head. Eventually the grizzled lumberjack nodded. "Yeah, that adds up."

With that, he turned over and went to sleep. Stan was a little surprised that the guy accepted their explanation just like that. But then again, Dan had lived in Gravity Falls his whole life.

Ford grabbed a folding chair from the card table and carried it out into the giftshop.

"Are you seriously gonna stay up and keep watch over that snowglobe thing all night?" Stan asked incredulously.

"My usual sleeping place is already occupied, I may as well."

"Y’know, operating on so little sleep just makes you more likely to screw up.”

“Don’t worry. I’m well accustomed to it.”

“Not reassuring.” Stan said flatly, turning and climbing the stairs up to his room. If he was being perfectly honest with himself, he probably wouldn’t sleep a wink tonight either. But at least he was going to try. Ford was going to run himself ragged if he kept up this pace.

- - -

Nights in prison were the worst part of the whole ordeal, in Gideon's opinion. At least during the day, he was able to sway the other inmates to do what he wanted. There was a sort of mob mentality that he could take control of. But at night, it was just Gideon and his cell-mate, and there was nothing the boy could do to stop the hulking man from taking his pillow and doing whatever he wanted with it.

Last week, the convicted felon had staged a wedding in their cell. He’d made a veil out of toilet paper and hummed “Here Comes the Bride” and everything. Tonight, he seemed to be discussing the possibility of children with his new “wife”.

“But Tessa, your mother and your aunt both died in childbirth! I’m just worried about you, honey!” He paused for whatever imagined reply the pillow gave. “Adoption, you say? I’ll admit, I had not considered it.”

Gideon groaned. He couldn’t even put a pillow over his ears to try and block out the nonsense! He’d tried to persuade the warden to let him switch cell mates so he could room with Ghost Eyes, but apparently they were “both instigators” and putting them both in the same cell would be “asking for a prison riot”.

The boy’s eyes flicked with annoyance to the cat poster still hiding his last attempt to summon Bill Cipher. The triangle had appeared and promised he was working on something, but so far Bill had failed to deliver.

“Stupid useless demon!” Gideon muttered under his breath. He rolled over, expecting another sleepless night.

Well, it did turn out to be sleepless, but not for the reason he’d anticipated.

It was a little past 10 PM when Gideon heard the familiar sound of an old van’s engine revving. He’d heard it many times on his father’s used car lot, but what on earth would one of those junkers be doing here?

That’s when he heard the unmistakable sound of a van crashing through a wall. Followed by the even more unmistakable sound of a machine gun.

“Heavens to Betsy, what was that!?” Gideon ran to his barred window just in time to see a pudgy man with a machine gun walk away from the wreckage of where a large van had burst through the prison wall. His maniacal laughter sounded familiar.

“Well whaddya know? Bill came through!” Gideon said in a hushed whisper.

He dove away from the window with a yelp a second later when the machine gun started firing in his direction. A few seconds later there was a much quieter bang as a tall ladder hit the wall just outside the window.

“HEY GIDEON, I HEARD YOU WERE GETTING TIRED OF YOUR PRISON AND WANT TO FIND SOMEPLACE NEW TO PARTY?”

“Bill!?”

“THE ONE AND ONLY!”

“Are you trying to kill me, you maniac!?”

“YEESH, YOU FLESH-SACKS ARE SO SENSITIVE! YOU’RE FINE. BESIDES, I NEEDED TO LOOSEN THESE BARS!” He ripped out the bars on the window with ease. They’d already been loosened by the machine gun fire. “YOU COMING OR NOT? I NEED YOUR HELP STAGING A LITTLE PRISON BREAK OF MY OWN.”

Gideon pouted and followed the demon down the ladder, grumbling the whole way.

“... You know what, Tessa? I don’t think I want kids after all.” Gideon’s cowering cell mate said after they left.

Bill kept the guards off them with plenty of machine gun fire, but he had little regard for who he was shooting at, guard or prisoner. He even narrowly missed Gideon on a few occasions.

“Oooh, I hope Killbone’s foot will be ok.” The boy hissed sympathetically as he saw one of his inmate friends go down.

“NAH, HE’S CRIPPLED FOR LIFE!”

They finally made it to the van, and Gideon climbed into the passenger-side door. Bill followed after him.

“A-aren’t you gonna drive?” The boy asked.

“TCH, FUNNY! I JUST RAMMED THIS THING THROUGH THREE WALLS OF CONCRETE; YOU THINK THE MEASLY COMBUSTION ENGINE STILL WORKS?” He flicked a lighter on and dropped it down between the driver’s seat and the steering wheel. Gideon could smell the gasoline. This thing was going to blow any second. He scampered over the benches and out the back door. Bill followed casually behind him.

“Then how are we supposed to get away!?” Gideon demanded as he sprinted to put distance between himself and the burning van.

“RELAX, SHORT-STACK, I’VE GOT A SECOND GET-AWAY CAR RIGHT HERE!” Bill pointed out a small black Audi parked behind a tall tree.

“Then why did you set the van on fire?” Gideon asked in confusion.

“BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT’D BE FUN.” Bill grinned as the van blew up behind them. Gideon screamed and ducked to avoid fiery flying debris. “AND I WAS RIGHT!”

Gideon got into Bill’s car. There was no child’s car seat. “You better drive careful.” He warned the demon.

“AHAHAHAHA, OH GIDEON, YOU’RE ALWAYS A RIOT!” Bill struggled to shift the car into drive, and Gideon had just enough time to realize with horror that the demon didn’t really know how to operate a human vehicle before it sped off through the trees.

#Gravity Falls #Fanfiction #Stanford Pines #Stanley Pines #Gideon Gleeful #Bill Cipher #My Writing

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eregyrn-falls · 3 years

Photo

Gravity Falls Soundtrack Vinyl LP!

Meanwhile - remember this? You can preorder this at iam8bit.com, or you can wait to get it through TheMysteryShack.com. (And other places, I’m sure!)

Here’s the text from the site above:

Shipping Q2 2021

.......................................

In the grand tradition of Gravity Falls, we’re taking a cue from Grunkle Stan and keeping this product description a wee bit cryptic. After all, the proprietor of the Mystery Shack wouldn’t dare reveal all of his secrets in a single breath. Instead, as part of the price of admission (i.e. pre-ordering this decadently vague musical recording), you, dear pre-purchaser, will be invited along on a journey through the unknown with iam8bit, Walt Disney Records, creator Alex Hirsch and composer Brad Breeck. Occasionally, and with absolutely no warning, we’ll share glimpses of the album as it takes its final form, via the interwebs (ephemeral mail… err… e-mail; Twitter seances; etc.), giving you an inside look at what is bound to be the most profoundly definitive musical recording, frankly, ever. Seriously, this is a very special release, many years in the making, excruciatingly manicured by the impeccable duo of Hirsch and Breeck… and it will be unlike anything else you’ve ever played on a turntable. For now, place your pre-order, then sit back, relax and wonder why you just spent your hard-earned money on a thing you’ve never even seen.

Tracklists:

[A Side] 01. Gravity Falls Theme Song 02. Let's Rewind 03. Gobblewonker Chase 04. Pig Is Soos 05. Book Discovery - Gideon's Theme 06. Wax Battle 07. Boyz Crazy Medley 08. Let's Do This 09. Is It Bottomless - Triangulum Entagulum 10. ybmaL A stnaW ohW 11. Fight Fighters - Battle Suite 12. Blanchin'

[B Side] 01. Finally I Have Them All 02. Gideon's Song 03. It's All Let Up To This 04. Working Girls 05. Gnome Chase 06. Gideon Rises - End Credits 07. Who's That Girl 08. Fiddleford Hadron Magucket 09. Stan Wrong Song 10. A Very Tricky Triangle 11. DISCO GIRL (dub)

[C Side] 01. A World of Enchantment or Whatever - I Came Up With A Plan 02. The Two Kids Who Ruined My Life 03. Everything Changes Today 04. TIME BATTLE!!! 05. Blackened Skies 06. Don't Let Them Escape 07. I Wanna Be Exes 08. I Need That Machine To Stay On 09. Yeah Dude Friends - Your Fighting Only Makes Us Look More Rad 10. Takin' Over 2 Nite

[D Side] 01. Mabel It's Bill 02. Goat and a Pig 03. Weirdmageddon Pt. 1 - Suite 04. Giggle Creek 05. Bill Tricked Me 06. My Heart Is Made of Rainbows 07. I'm a Flippin' Corduroy 08. Saying Goodbye to Gravity Falls 09. Weirdmageddon Pt. 4 - End Credits 10. Grvatiy lFals ehTme (s'lliB deppohC dna dewercS ximeR) 11. We'll Meet Again

#gravity falls #merch #music #long post

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portalford · 3 years

Text

I Can Picture You So Easily

AO3

It hits Stan at the stupidest times.

Well. That makes it sounds like Stan just forgets, when really it never quite goes away — sometimes it’s just more.

Like now.

He’s looking in the mirror — he found it tucked way, way back in a closet (and he’s gonna skip right over that because when he got here the mirror in the bathroom was broken, cracked until you couldn’t see a thing and why was Ford—nope) — and he’s trying out a new look for Mr. Mystery.

Gotta keep it fresh, right? Accessorize?

Glasses aren’t accessories, unfortunately. He can’t go without them anymore.

(Really, he needed them years ago, but he was too stubborn to admit it, or too broke, or whatever, but he’s literally tripping over his own feet now. Needs must).

Ford wouldn’t be caught dead in this getup. No sense of fashion. So that’s fine.

The glasses—

(Ford started wearing glasses when he was six. Stan had laughed himself silly when they went to the drugstore and tried on the biggest, most obnoxious frames they could find. Ma had scolded, but she’d been too distracted checking price tags to do more than scold.

In the end, they went with some cheap horn-rimmed frames that Stan wouldn’t be caught dead in even now. Old-man glasses, at six. But that was Ford all over).

—they bring some stuff up. The twin thing sucks, sometimes.

(Looking in a mirror and seeing the changes, the lines in his face, the grey in his hair — does Ford have crow’s feet now? Is his hair going silver? It was always unmanageable — is it thinning like Stan’s is now, or is it still thick and flyaway, like it was when Ford was sixteen? Did he even live long enough to get lines in his face and aches in his joints, or is he forever twenty-eight, dead somewhere in the universe?)

Time to stop thinking.

Notice the differences.

Stan’s ears and nose are bigger than Ford’s, always have been. He’s heavier and his shoulders are broader.

(Has Ford gotten bulkier, fighting to survive? Or is still he halfway to gaunt, like the last time Stan saw him?)

Definitely time to stop thinking.

Stan flashes a smile, and yeah, that’s all him. Cheerful, magnetic, and a hundred percent fake.

Time to work the crowds.

*****

There’s an ad for the nice ink pens Ford saved up to buy when he was fourteen.

Stan turns it off.

*****

Mabel finds a picture, once.

“Grunkle Stan!” Her eyes are all lit up as she shows him the torn photograph. “I found this under a floorboard in the attic!”

If Stan ever had any doubts about his poker face, he can lay them to rest now. It’s all on the ropes and his expression is perfectly level, maybe even a little curious.

Mabel is still talking. “I didn’t know there were pictures of you before you were all old! Do you have any others?”

Oh.

Stan still forgets sometimes, even after everything, that most people can’t tell him and Ford apart.

He knows better.

The young man in the photograph is unmistakably Ford, taken while he was living in Gravity Falls. He’s got his head bent over that journal of his, but the photographer managed to catch the eager light in his eye, the edge of his smile.

Stan wonders who that photographer was, all those years ago.

A tug at his shirt reminds him he’s not alone, and he definitely can’t get messed up about this picture of his secret twin brother.

Mabel’s face has fallen a bit. “Grunkle Stan? Are you okay?”

Stan gives himself two more seconds to look at the picture — Ford just looks so happy; Stan can’t even remember the last time Ford looked like that, even before it all fell apart — and turns to Mabel.

“Yeah,” he says. He smiles and ruffles her hair. “Pretty good picture, huh?”

*****

The name is the worst.

Stan never thought identity theft could involve so little fun.

Usually he can get away with just “Stan Pines,” and that’s fine. That’s his name. That’s who he’s supposed to be.

Sometimes, though, that’s not enough for whoever’s asking.

“What did you say your name was again?”

He smiles. Lays it on thick. “Stanford Pines.”

“Could you sign here?”

He does. His blocky, uneven handwriting looks even worse than usual where he’s expecting to see neat, flowing script, the way Stanford Pines is supposed to be written.

“This is Stanford Pines,” someone will say. “Mr. Mystery.”

Stan smiles some more. Yes, Stanford Pines is certainly that.

Gideon is the worst. Stanford this and Stanford that and Stan’s never wanted to punch a child so much in his life.

“Stanford Pines!”

He smiles, and he lies.

*****

Dipper halfway drives him nuts sometimes.

It’s not like the kid’s a mini-Ford — he reminds Stan enough of himself, sometimes, though Stan’s not sure that’s great either — but he’s got the brains and the stubbornness and the love of weird nonsense, for sure.

He’s also got that obsessive edge, the drive that sent Ford right off the metaphorical cliff.

Usually Mabel tags along on the weirdness hunts — they make a day of it. They go out, just the two of them, and come back laughing and joking and shoving at each other.

That’s enough of a painful reminder, but sometimes Stan will catch Mabel sitting by herself, coloring or crafting with a little less energy than usual, and he’ll realize that Dipper’s buried himself in monster theory again.

He tries to keep the kid busy with chores and hustle, but it’s a losing battle.

It was the first time, too.

*****

There’s this old song that Ford used to love when they were younger.

It’s got no words, and Stan used to make fun of it — what's the point of a song with no words? But Ford insisted it had Meaning, capital M.

It comes on the radio now and then.

Depending on how masochistic Stan is feeling that day, he might let it play.

He still wonders what Ford heard in this song, and if Ford would hear it now.

*****

He realizes, one day near the end, that he’s been Stanford longer than he’s been Stanley.

What’s the point, really? What does a name matter if it’s so easy for someone else to take your place?

(Did Ford matter so little, in the grand scheme of things, that not one person could recognize him in a place he lived for six years?

Does Stan, in a place he’s lived for almost thirty?)

If he could just stop catching Ford in his reflection now and then, that’d be great.

*****

It’s not any better once Ford gets back (once Stan brings Ford back, the ungrateful bastard).

“Stanford!”

Stan’s got a smile on his face before he even turns around, and what’s wrong with him that he’s halfway made this lie into a Pavlovian response? Someone calls him Stanford, he smiles and lies.

(Stanford — the real Stanford — is in the basement right now. He doesn’t even exist, as far as anyone else is concerned. Stan is Stanford, Stanley is dead, and Ford is a nonentity.

What a life this is).

*****

“So how was it?”

Stan grunts. “How was what?”

Ford rolls his neck, wincing a little as he works out the unavoidable crick from hunching over a drawing for twenty minutes. “Being me.”

Stan shrugs. “Wasn’t hard. We’re basically the same person, y’know.”

Ford snorts. A long time (a lifetime) ago that comment might have gotten him worked up, but he’s steadier now, softer around the edges. “Very funny. I saw your lease renewal. You didn’t even change your handwriting, for heaven’s sake.”

“Ford, I rolled up to town, said I was you, and started a tourist trap. You had a total personality transplant and nobody noticed.” Stan grimaces. That sounded really bad.

Ford’s expression has gone rueful and a little sad at the edges, but he doesn’t seem like he’s about launch into full-blown self-recrimination, so that’s fine. “Yes, well. That’s what happens when you isolate yourself for six years and your only friend erases his mind to cope with the mistakes you made.”

And that’s Ford trying to shoulder all the blame again, but Stan keeps his mouth shut. They’re both too comfortable to argue right now. “Being honest — for once — it kinda sucked.” Ford’s looking at him, open and encouraging, so Stan keeps going. “Everyone thought I was you, and it—I wasn’t. I didn’t want to be.” Stan shrugs. “I wanted you you.”

Ford smiles, and it’s a little more worn than Stan remembers, but it’s real, and it’s him. “I understand. I met a few parallel versions of you on my travels, and they were you, but — they weren’t really you.” Ford closes his journal (his new one) and sets it aside, tipping his head back over his chair. More playfully, he adds, “I wouldn’t want to be you either, Stanley.”

Stan laughs. “Yeah? Couldn’t handle the salesmanship?”

“Have more self-respect than to wear any part of your wardrobe.”

“Says the man who wears sweaters in the summer.”

Ford lifts his head and smiles, and this time it’s almost exactly how Stan remembers — quick and a little crooked. “Fair enough.” Ford stretches, rolls his neck again. “For what it’s worth, Stanley, I am glad to be back.” A wry look. “Even if it’s going to take ages to sort out the criminal record you gave me.”

Stan slouches deeper into the couch. Any further and he’s going to slide off, but that’s a risk he’ll take. “Yeah, yeah. Talk to me when you’re legally dead.”

“You did that.”

“And?”

“I legally don’t exist.”

“I was trying to learn theoretical physics at the time, Stanford; cut a man some slack.”

Ford laughs, quiet. “Did I ever thank you for that?”

Stan cracks an eye open. He didn’t realize he closed them. “What, learnin’ physics? Because I’m pretty sure that’s some of the stuff that’s not coming back.”

Ford rolls his eyes. “For saving me.”

“Hm.” Ford’s thanked him several times, but lately it’s been less Ford kicking himself and more Ford cautiously trying to engage in the old back-and-forth they used to have, and Stan can get behind that one. “I dunno. Might have to say it again.”

“You’re burning through my gratitude very quickly,” Ford says mildly, “but all right. Thank you for saving me. You knucklehead.”

Stan never got called that when he was Ford. He thinks he’s missed it, at least the way Ford says it — like it means something completely different.

“Uh-huh.” Stan’s eyes are closed again. He figures he’ll just leave them closed. “Missed you too, nerd.”

And maybe there’s something to be said for being your own person.

It feels pretty good.

#gravity falls #gravity falls fanfiction #stanley pines #stanford pines #back on the angst with a happy ending train #feat. a side of introspection and melodrama!#i love it here

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anistarrose · 3 years

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Summary: Winters running the Mystery Shack are difficult, but two unexpected guests improve Stan’s day.

Characters: Stan Pines, Mabel Pines, Dipper Pines, Ford Pines

Relationships: Mabel Pines & Stan Pines, Dipper Pines & Stan Pines, Dipper Pines & Mabel Pines & Stan Pines

Happy Holidays, @halogalopaghost! I'm your Secret Santa, here to mash together a couple different prompts through the power of time travel (and Mabel)!

***

It doesn’t take Stan many years to learn that winter’s no good for the rural Oregon tourist business.

Granted, he can hardly blame the tourists — he has to drive on Gravity Falls roads himself, much to his disgust. Between the paved, plowed streets that always turn slick with ice where you least expect them, and the winding gravel roads that you might as well ignore when road and wilderness alike are under identical four-inch blankets of snow, he knows no gallery of fake haunted paintings or taxidermied coyote’s ass is worth the trip in these conditions.

He’s on his third winter in town, now — not counting the first, worst one he arrived at the tail end of — and if there’s a right way to run a business this time of year, he hasn’t found it yet. He always scrapes together just enough to pay his bills, thanks the occasional local who wanders over to purchase a seasonally appropriate if overpriced snow globe — but he’s lucky if he breaks even in December, and knows January through March are a lost cause before they begin. He’ll make it back within the next year, sometimes even before summer ends, but it stings to know he’s about to fail at his one goal for the next three to four months straight, and there’s nothing he can do to change it.

It might sting less if he had another way to spend these winters — if he had a good reason to formally close the Shack for a few months, like an experienced business owner making a grounded and responsible decision. But he can’t even search for Ford’s journals in this weather — he’s learned from his mistakes, his countless brushes with frostbite, throughout those cold, desperate months in the wake of the portal shutting down.

He’s useless right now, and worse, this season’s shaping up to be the bleakest yet. His usually-scammable neighbors have already lined their shelves with winter knicknacks from Mystery Shack visits past, and the bulk of Stan’s meager sales have come from shivering out-of-towners who’ve never tried to take a Pacific Northwest road trip in December before, and probably won’t be keen to try again.

What seasonal merchandise hasn’t he sold yet? Bumper stickers for miscellaneous holidays, maybe — but neither timely bumper stickers nor the usual selection of tchotchkes will convince people to visit the Shack in the first place, under these road conditions. He can’t even walk around selling merch door to door, for the same reason he can’t look for the other journals — he’d freeze to death, presuming he could make it through the snowdrifts to somewhere worth visiting in the first place. Even with snow chains on the Stanmobile’s tires and a bucket of salt in her trunk, grocery runs alone are perilous enough.

Damn it, Ford, he thinks, why couldn’t you have gone missing in Florida?

He could always do what he does best and lie, maybe — send out word that there’s free hot chocolate or something with every purchase at the Mystery Shack, and hope that people hand over their hard-earned cash before they pick up on the false advertising. He might draw in some local customers that way, and even if he loses their trust for the next few months, they always seem to forget about his cons eventually — as if he never scammed them, and they’ve never so much as heard the words caveat emptor.

He’s just about to dial the local paper’s number on the phone, hoping to flatter Toby into letting him run another ad for free, when he hears a telltale knock at the gift shop door. The bell atop that door doesn’t ring, which means that despite the hostile winds and snow they braved to get here, his visitors are still out loitering on the porch — or so Stan thinks for a moment, before it dawns on him that he doesn’t even remember unlocking the door this morning. He’d just been that pessimistic about even seeing a customer.

“Hello?” someone calls — a fairly young voice, probably approaching the tail end of puberty. “Are you there, uh…Mr. Mystery?”

“On my way!” Stan shouts, throwing on his fez and bolting for the door. His neighbors in Gravity Falls might forget and forgive a lot, but he doesn’t want to risk the wrath of a parent whose teenage kid froze to death on the local grifter’s doorstep, so he unlocks and flings open the door as fast as he can. “Welcome, travelers! Prepare to be baffled and bemused by our mind-boggling boreal mysteries, here at this last refuge at the edge of the Arctic we like to call the Cryptid Cabin!”

His visitor — no, his two visitors — both blink slowly, proving to at least be baffled, if nothing else. Both are bundled up in what Stan assumes to be several sheep worth of wool garments, lovingly knitted into sweaters, hats, and scarves.

“But you call this place the Mystery Shack,” the girl speaks up, and the boy nods.

“Yeah, and we’re nowhere near the Arctic! This is Oregon, not Alaska!”

Stan groans — the only customers he might see all week, and of course they’re teenagers. “Look, punks, business is slow these days! I’ve had a lot of time to think about a seasonal rebranding, and not a lot of chances to workshop it, alright?”

The teens’ expressions instantly soften, and the girl exclaims: “Well, you can workshop it with us!” She grabs the other kid — her brother? — by the hand, and pulls him into the gift shop.

Maybe Stan’s judged them too quickly — he’s still not thrilled to have strangers pitying him, of course, but he’ll take it over strangers mocking him any day of the week.

“Dang, you’re right,” the boy comments once inside, and face-to-face with shelves of untouched merchandise. “It really is empty in here in the winter.”

With little light coming in from the windows, and a flickering bulb overhead that will soon need replacing, the often-bustling room is now dim and eerie — aside from the junk food wrappers on the floor, which Stan hastily kicks under his desk.

“Look at all the lonely snowglobes in need of homes!” the girl pipes up, swiping a glass-encased antelabbit off the shelf and giving it a hearty shake. “Good thing I’m here to adopt this lucky little guy — how much is he?”

Stan takes a second to run the numbers — the maximum amount of money a teen would have on hand, versus what Stan needs to charge to make a profit — and replies: “Twenty-nine ninety-nine and nothing more. We don’t do sales tax here, ‘less you’re a cop.”

“Bet there’s a lot of other taxes you don’t do, either,” the boy snorts, rummaging through a shelf of hats until he unearths one with the old Murder Hut logo on it. “Aha! Now here’s a collector’s item!”

“Oh, did you come here before the rebrand and forget to grab a souvenir?” Stan asks. He doesn’t remember these two, but it’s been a couple years since he painted over the last Murder Hut sign — and they do seem pretty familiar with the building, not to mention Stan’s whole… business model.

“Oh, uh, that’s a funny story, actually! Real funny!” the boy stammers with a whole lot more trepidation than the topic should’ve warranted, and looks to his sister for help.

Sure enough, she steps in. “We lived here for a while — in Gravity Falls, I mean! Not here in the Shack, obviously — wouldn’t that be ridiculous, if we lived in your house for months without you knowing? Could you imagine —”

“That is to say, we still visit sometimes!” the boy supplies. His eyes are a whole lot more fixated on the snowglobes than with anything in Stan’s general direction. “You probably don’t remember us — we weren’t in town for very long, or anything…”

Stan sighs. They’re lying, obviously — but hey, there’s no cops in the Mystery Shack, and he doesn’t have a dog in whatever fight compelled the duo to spew this bullshit. He’ll keep an eye on the cash register, of course, but these kids are tolerable company when they’re not being suspicious as hell — so if they want to invent a bad cover story for a low-stakes tourist trap visit, more power to them.

“Well, the hat’s vintage, so that’ll be double price. Twenty bucks,” he announces matter-of-factly, and the boy groans — but there’s a smile behind it, like he’d expected this and now he’s just playing along. If there’s one thing Stan’s willing to believe, it’s that these kids have been to the Mystery Shack before.

“You’re a highway robber, old man, and I’m the coward who’s gonna let you get away with it,” the boy declares, and Stan can’t help but laugh. The kid reaches under several layers of sweaters to pull out a wallet, with a blue pine tree embroidered on, and miscellaneous charms of fantasy characters hanging off a chain on the side. Stan doesn’t recognize any of them, but they still tug at his heartstrings, because he can tell they’re the exact kind of nerdy references Ford would love.

He does take note of the pine tree design, though — it’s generic enough that slapping it on some shirts and hats wouldn’t quite be plagiarism, and in Stan’s eyes, those are always the best souvenir designs.

The kids put their money forward, hovering awkwardly as Stan rings up their items — the girl busies herself attacking a loose string on her brother’s scarf, nimble fingers tying it back in its approximate place, while the boy twiddles his thumbs and stares at the snowy, gray scene out the window. At the moment, only light flurries fill the air, but tomorrow night promises a blizzard… and Stan, grump with a soft side that he is, can’t help but hope that if these kids are really on vacation, then they aren’t planning to drive anywhere tonight.

With it being winter, and him running the business that he does, he doesn’t have much charity to give — but, if he’s going to play along with his customers’ little lie, then he should probably at least bring up the topic.

“You’re not hittin’ the road any time soon, are you?” He makes eye contact only with the green illustrated presidents in his hands, so not to come across as overly invested. “Weather forecast says tonight’s gonna be a doozy.”

“Aww, you’re worried about us?” the girl coos, because apparently both parties here are damn good at picking up on each other’s lies. “That’s so sweet — but you don’t have to be! Our great uncle’s waiting for us in town, and he’ll… well, let’s just say he’s planning to bring us back home before the blizzard hits.”

“He’s, uh — he lived here back in the seventies, so he knows what he’s doing,” the boy adds. “On the roads, that is. Mostly.”

“Well, you two take care,” Stan tells them, hastily adding on: “So you can come back when the weather isn’t terrible and buy more keychains, that is.”

“Oh, we will.” The boy grins, sharing a conspiratorial glance with his sister. “Maybe don’t count on it being next year — or the year after that, even — but you can count on it.”

“Well, uh…” Stan stops himself, resisting the impulse to divulge things he really shouldn’t. “You just shouldn’t count on me running this place forever. Be sure to get your novelty cryptid pins while they’re hot, y’know.”

He’s never really wondered what he’ll do with the Shack when he gets Ford back — and yes, he has to believe that statement deserves a when, not an if — but he figures the Shack’s fate will depend more on Ford’s own whims. If reality lands somewhere between the nightmares of Ford wanting him gone and the fantasies of finally sailing around the world, if Ford doesn’t hate him but still wants to spend more time with Important Science Experiments than with his brother, then Stan could see himself returning to a mediocre life in his moderately successful tourist trap… but with the search for the journals still coming up empty, Stan can only try not to think about the future, and accept that he’ll just cross — or burn — that bridge when he comes to it.

“Okay, Mr. Mystery,” the girl suddenly declares with a tone that frankly reminds Stan of his mother, “you look like you could use a pick-me-up!”

“What?” It’s starting to freak Stan out how well she can read him, and there’s no telling whether it’s just a sharp intuition, or something significantly more Gravity Falls-y. “If I look tired, kid, it’s because it’s December in Oregon, I haven’t seen the sun in a week, and I am tired. Only pick-me-up I need is for you to get out of my hair, and let me go back into hibernation like nature intended.”

“Okay, but counterpoint: you hear us out,” the boy insists. “We’ve got a little something up our sleeve to really light up your winter —” He winks at his sister. “Don’t we?”

“You bet we do!” She pulls a bag of marshmallows out of not her sleeve, but her backpack, and grins. “Prepare to be amazed and astounded by the natural wonders of this town, and also the miracle that is processed sugar and gelatin!”

“Are you imitating my sales pitches?” Stan asks, dumbfounded. “And do you carry those on you at all times?”

“In winter in Gravity Falls, I do!” the girl replies, already heading for the exit with her brother. “C’mon! If this doesn’t put a smile on your face, nothing will!”

“We all know you’ve got time to spare, Stan,” the boy adds, cracking open the door. “Get a move on!”

“Spare time doesn’t mean I’ve got spare limbs to lose to frostbite,” Stan grumbles, but follows them anyway. There’s something captivating about these little punks — not so much this mysterious phenomenon they’re trying to sell him on, as if they could really out-charlatan Mr. Mystery himself, but rather the way they’re not put off by his frigid facade. They see right through him, showering him in alternating kindness and acerbic wit.

Stan can’t help but wonder if their uncle’s kind of like him — tired, bitter, and pretending to be indifferent, but secretly soft on the inside, like a marshmallow that’s burnt on the surface but melted within. It would explain why they’re so good at calling him on his shit — but then again, Stan and this mystery guy can’t be too alike, because if Stan had a niece and nephew like these two, he’s sure he’d be living his life a whole lot differently.

He exits the Shack, and all his questions are immediately replaced with new ones when he sees the teens just hurling marshmallows towards the edge of the woods. The wind’s in their favor, so some of those sugary little fuckers fly far.

“Okay, so I’ve already got a couple concerns,” Stan tells them, shivering. “First off, what the hell?”

“It might take a couple minutes before one shows up,” the girl admits, as if it’s a totally reasonable stand-alone explanation for whatever the hell’s going on here. With about a third of the marshmallows now blending into the snow on Stan’s lawn, she and her brother stop with the throwing, though they still hold onto the bag. “Our grunkle theorized that they move slower in winter, to save energy — oh wait, never mind! Here comes one now!”

“Sorry, what? And where?” Stan squints out into the woods, terrified to lay his eyes upon a woodland monster these kids just lured to his doorstep — but all he sees, at first, are a few wisps of smoke dispersing in the wind above the trees. He’s not even convinced it’s smoke, really, because these aren’t the right conditions for a fire — but to his surprise, he glimpses an orange light within the woods, glowing steadily brighter until the trees and bushes around it are all casting faint shadows.

When it steps into the clearing, Stan realizes he has seen something like it before, albeit only from the overcautious distance he tries to keep from all anomalies. It’s an otherwise normal campfire perched on wooden, spiderlike legs, and it melts a path in the snow as it trots forwards, then lowers itself to the ground to absorb the first of a dozen marshmallows.

It lets out a satisfied little sound — a low, steady crackle that sounds almost like a purr — then scampers up to the next morsel of food to repeat the process.

“It’s called a Scampfire!” the girl explains, beaming. “There’s a bunch of them out in the woods, and they’ll always wander over if you leave out enough campfire food — especially sugary stuff! Isn’t that cute?”

“Our great uncle figured out this amazing trick when he used to live here, and he passed it down to us!” the boy adds, practically bouncing up and down in place. “If you leave them a trail of food, they’ll follow you around until you run out — which means they can clear your driveway, warm your hands, even save your car if you drive into a snowbank! Or help you make s’mores, of course.”

“Our grunkle says he even skipped paying his heating bill a couple winters,” the girl adds with a grin, “but I dunno if we can recommend that in good conscience.”

As the scampfire draws a closer, continuing to purr as it consumes more of the sugary trail, the boy slaps a handful of marshmallows into Stan’s palm. “Give it a try!”

Stan’s not thrilled about bringing a fire onto the wooden porch attached to his wooden house, even as cute as said fire is, so instead he tosses his ammunition at something much more disposable — the golf cart, since if this one croaks, he can always just steal another from the insufferable rich family up on the hill. His aim isn’t great — he blames his cold fingers — but exactly one marshmallow lands right in the cart’s driver seat.

The scampfire breaks course from its path towards the Shack, clearing a path through the snow before it crawls into the cart, absorbing the final morsel and curling up atop crossed legs. Nothing explodes, and in fact, a few of the icicles on the awning start to melt, dripping water into the patch of bare muddy ground surrounding the cart.

“Huh,” Stan mutters. Dozens of harebrained schemes flash before his eyes — if he could find a slingshot, or even better, some kind of cannon to mount on the cart’s front hood, then he’s sure that with practice, he could entice some scampfires to clear a path through any snowdrift…

But no matter his exact solution, it’s a way to get into town consistently. He can finally go door-to-door selling knickknacks, instead of sitting in the gift shop every day and hoping some poor soul would get bored enough to brave the roads and visit. He can actually work out a way to line his pockets even in the winter, instead of constantly waking up from nightmares about getting foreclosed on —

“See? They get food, and we don’t freeze — classic mutualistic symbiotic relationship!” the boy declares, and his sister gently socks him in the arm.

“Nerd!”

“Hey, you knew that too! We’re in the same biology class!”

It’s familiar, but the kind of familiarity that Stan doesn’t treasure anymore. It’s more like the kind that he hides in the basement or in boarded-up rooms whenever he can, and grins and bears with a heavy heart when he can’t, like every time he looks in the mirror or hears someone call him Stanford. He comes so close to asking these teens if they’re twins, because he figures the answer can’t be worse than wondering — but the question dies in his throat, and he tells himself it’s for the best.

“Is your uncle who invented this trick the same one who’s waiting in town for you?” he asks instead.

“Yep!” replies the girl. “He probably won’t get worried about us for like, ten or fifteen more minutes, though — I’m sure he’s got his nose buried deep in a book right now.”

“Do me a favor and let him know he’s a lifesaver,” Stan says. “Also tell him I’m glad he moved out, because he sounds a little too smart to fall for the fake monster wares that I peddle.”

The kids exchange a look that Stan can’t even hope to comprehend, though he’s damn sure it’s worth a thousand words to the two of them. Twins or not, he’s getting an “inseparable” kind of vibe from these two, that’s for sure.

“I’m not sure he’d like the Shack at first,” the brother muses, “but I’ve got a hunch it would grow on him.”

“He does like cryptids — sometimes even fake ones!” the sister chimes in. “Oh, shoot — we still need to grab a souvenir for him! I knew we were forgetting something!”

“Huh.” Stan throws a few more marshmallows in the direction of the woods, and the scampfire stumbles off the cart before trotting along on its merry way back to the forest. “I can get you something, no problem — I don’t call this place a gift shop for nothing, y’know. But for the love of Paul Bunyan, let’s talk about it inside.”

He’s not great at mental math, but he doesn’t have to be to know he owes a lot to these teens and the mysterious uncle he might never meet. Hell, even forgetting the business perspective — he can actually look for the journals in winter without risking frostbite, if he gets one of his fiery neighbors to tag along. Even if he finds nothing, even if he only winds up with more failures to contend with, he’d rather rule out locations than be useless to Ford for months at a time.

None of this weird family that he might never see again, these three benevolent strangers that he can only put two faces to, could possibly know how much they’ve just changed for him — and he can’t tell them, as much as his oversized heart promises he can trust these snarky kids who remind him so much of himself. But he does owe them, so when he reenters the gift shop, he goes straight for a seldom-opened and never-advertised box of knickknacks that he has no intention of charging them for. It’s got the dimensions of only about two side-by-side shoeboxes, so he lifts it onto the counter with hardly a grunt, and opens it up.

“Got lots of goodies in here — mostly stuff that I made or, ahem, acquired in bulk, so they never quite sold out by the time everyone and their mother in town had already bought their own. Take a gander.”

He knows that gander will reveal some Murder Hut-branded shirts with the words written on in marker, plastic six-sided dice with a different cryptids pictured on each side, cheap whistles purported to attract Bigfoot, cheap flashlights once advertised for attracting Mothman, exactly three cool rocks that Stan found in the woods… and the pièce de résistance, a little wooden Mystery Shack-shaped music box, which chirps out a pleasant tune when Stan flips up the roof. That last one’s a rare knickknack that Stan really put effort into personally crafting, back at the height of last winter’s monotony, through cannibalizing parts of premade music boxes and sticking them into brand-new shapes — but he couldn’t sell them for enough to be worth the cost of making more, and could never sell this last one at all.

“Oh, wow!” the girl gasps, clearly delighted. “How can I even choose between —”

“No, take it all. It’s on the house — but don’t you dare tell anyone about this, you hear me? I’ll know if you blab, ‘cause people will start asking me if they can get free crap, too, and I don’t wanna hear a word of that nonsense.”

“Free stuff at the Mystery Shack?” The boy narrows his eyes. “Are you feeling okay, old man?”

“Kid, stuff only goes in the Free Bullshit Box when I can’t sell it anyway.” Stan crosses his arms with a huff, even though he’s technically telling the truth. “The only catch is take it before I change my mind.”

A sudden spark of recognition in the brother’s eyes morphs into a grin on his face, and he nods. “Oh, we will. Don’t worry.”

“I think our grunkle will love this! Especially the dice,” the sister adds. “Hey, maybe we could give all this to him piece by piece for Hanukkah! There’s enough here for a new surprise every night!”

“Whoa, there is! Man, the look on his face the first time we bring out a Bigfoot whistle is gonna be great —” The boys eyes dart to the watch on his wrist, and he coughs into his hand. “But we should probably get a move on, huh? Don’t want to get caught in, y’know, the blizzard tonight.”

“Yeah, no kidding.” Stan returns the lid and hands the box over. “You, uh, need a ride back to town? ‘Cause being a man of mystery and all, I know this neat trick to clear a whole road with just a bag full of marshmallows —”

The kids both start cackling, so hard that the box almost escapes the girl’s hands, and Stan laughs with them — not because he thought his joke was that funny, but because the kids’ laughter is absolutely priceless. The isolation’s definitely getting to his head and his heart, but he’ll take whatever reprieve he can get.

“I think we’ll manage on our own,” the boy finally wheezes out, “but thanks for the offer, Mr. Mystery. Thanks for everything, really.”

“See you later!” his sister adds as they leave. “Don’t let the feral gnomes bite!”

“You take care, too,” Stan replies, not nearly as loud — but he figures that the kids can read his lips. They can read so much about him, and know so much about the town, that he’s honestly a hair’s breadth away from assuming they’re two more anomalies from the woods themselves, just in more recognizable shapes than most…

Though if Stan’s honestly considering that theory, then more of Ford must’ve rubbed off on him than he likes to think about — which is to say, it’s a good a reason as any to stop thinking about it. What or whoever they were, the duo were actually pretty tolerable for teenagers, and Stan’s pretty sure they didn’t put a curse or whatever magic mumbo jumbo on him — because if they could manage that, they could definitely tell some less conspicuous lies, right?

He kinda likes the idea of one goddamn supernatural force in this town that’s actually benevolent, actually watching his back when his mood’s at its bleakest, and coming to his rescue with — no, he’s dropping that train of thought. No baseless hoping, just letting himself down easy before he gets up.

It does occur to him, several minutes after the gift shop door swings closed, that Hanukkah has already come and gone this year. Which probably just means the kids are prepared to hide that box for another twelve months… but maybe, when Stan finds the other journals, he’ll double-check for entries on helpful teenage cryptids who can’t lie. Just to be sure.

***

Mabel, Dipper, and Ford barrel into the living room so suddenly that Stan almost drops his mug of hot chocolate. They’re all covered in a ridiculous amount of snow, considering how briefly they were just outside, and Ford looks awfully delighted for someone whose glasses are someone whose glasses have just turned opaque with fog.

“Grunkle Stan!” Mabel shouts. The cardboard box in her arms has seen better days, but she’s cradling it like an infant. “You’ll never guess when we just were!”

Dipper points a gloved finger in the air. “You mean, when we just — oh wait, did you already —”

“Yeah, I beat you to it this time!” Mabel pumps her fist. “Anyways, Grunkle Stan — you’ll never guess who we just visited!”

#gravity falls #stanley pines #mabel pines #dipper pines #stanford pines #gravity falls secret santa 2020 #rosalia writes fic

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bluebellravenbooks · 3 years

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A Great Distraction Masterpost

January has been gloomy as heck, so I thought it may be a good idea to put together a list of things that I read/watched/played since the beginning of the pandemic that managed to keep my mind off things. (I'm a doctoral student with anxiety and a 5-second attention span, so if this worked for me chances are it's Good Stuff.) Hope this helps!

Steven Universe

Set millennia after a kinda-failed alien invasion, this is a story of a half-human protagonist with a big heart who has to deal with the consequences of this long-ago war and learn what it means to be human.

The trope of a peacekeeper hero, excellently executed. Goes from cute to cute and rather dark, but still hopeful. Nice songs, lovely animation, interesting characters; you can tell that the storytelling goes from the hearts of the people who made this. This is a generally uplifting story; however it does have some discussion of war, mental illness and parental death, so tw for that. Also depending on where you live, this may be a bit difficult to track down across the streaming services... That said, this is undoubtedly one of the best shows I have ever watched.

Hollow Knight

You are a tiny badass with a sword and a mysterious past, travelling across a derelict kingdom and trying to make sense of what happened to it. And the more you learn, the more you suspect that you are here for a reason...

A 2D platformer game, doesn't require anything fancy from your laptop - not even a mouse. Previous gaming experience not necessary either. Beautiful visuals (I mean it!), a huge world to explore; exasperatingly difficult, which makes for a great distraction. I do have to warn that the plot of this game revolves around an infection, although it's not very reminiscent of Covid. As a plus, you get to kick its ass in the end!

Avatar: The Last Airbender

Four great nations are at war - have been for some time, actually, and things aren't looking great. The discovery of the Avatar - the peacekeeper with abilities from all the nations - offers a glimmer of hope; however it doesn't help that the Avatar is eleven years old and has spent the last century frozen in an iceberg.

Truly, a classic. I love the trope of the peacekeeper hero - both Avatar and Steven Universe explore it beautifully. Just like with Steven, I have to mention a tw for war, but this being a cartoon it's not explicitly traumatic. A great place to start if you're not into cartoons yet.

The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells

Murderbot is a half-organic, half-robotic being, serving as a security unit on interplanetary missions. It's much more sentient and independent than its company believes - but all it wants is for the annoying humans to leave it in peace long enough to watch one more episode of its current show. However when things go south on a mission, Murderbot has to deal with much more reality - and human interaction - than it would like.

Very fun and quick read; the narrator's voice is just excellent. Much less bloodthirsty than the title suggests, but still a tw for injury and death. (Not too much though - I hate gore and I was perfectly fine reading this.)

Folk of the Air by Holly Black

Elfhame is no place for humans - well, normal humans, anyway. Jude Duarte was brought up here with her sisters, and she is hell-bent on proving her worth in the fairy court she has come to call home. Few are happy with that, or believe that she can make it - but even Jude herself wouldn't have guessed where the political turbulence would get her.

Very well-written; politics of the fairy court stand to logic and offer plenty of exciting plot twists. True to the title, some characters can be rather cruel, so tw for violence and parental death; however most of the plot revolves around politics and not explicit physical trauma.

Cartoon Saloon films: Secret of Kells, Song of the Sea, WolfWalkers

Some of the best modern animation plus Irish mythology. Each of these films explores a different myth/historical period, but they are similar in the magical atmosphere; I recommend each and every one of them. The plots being different, I won't list all the tw's here; there's nothing particularly gruesome going on, so just have a look at the plot description before watching to check for sensitive topics.

Gravity Falls

Dipper and Mabel are sent to a cabin deep in Oregon forest to spend the summer with their great-uncle. Sounds like a boring holiday - however it turns out that the town has more weird secrets than residents, and even their great-uncle seems to be hiding something...

Very cartooney, so the style might be a little off-putting at first - however I loved the plot, especially when the overstory started to pick up. This is a great exploration of family and what summer should feel like when you're an adventurous kid. Will probably get you into cryptography.

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power

Adora grew up with the bad guys. That is, of course, she thinks they are the good ones - until one day she escapes from the camp and sees much more than she bargained for. Oh yes, and apparently some magical sword wants her to be a hero. Now on the side of the rebellion, she has to protect her new friends, deal with the old ones, and try to figure out what the heck is going on.

This show is fun, very diverse and full of positivity without trying too hard. For me it was a joy to watch something with a lot of strong female characters without having the dark gender issues discussed, not even once. (I mean, it's still important to have shows that explicitly discuss this - but a show where characters are just happy in their identities, no questions asked, is something I didn't know I needed.)

Carmen Sandiego

The young woman who calls herself Carmen Sandiego has a rather unconventional occupation. She was brought up in a school for thieves - but when she glimpsed the outside world, she realised that things weren't as simple as her teachers said. Now she uses her expertise to track her former schoolmates - and steal back their loot.

This is probably the most young-age-oriented item on my list, so there's not a lot of drama going on, and some plotlines are rather simple. That said, this series is good fun, I still found the story and the characters compelling, and the animation was really good as well. Honestly, seeing what modern 2D animation can do is a treat.

These things - and many other - helped me stay sane during this year; I found out that stories can be fun shameless escapism and really deep and satisfying at the same time. Feel free to add to this list - and I will keep it updated as well when more good stuff comes my way.

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theradioghost · 4 years

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Do you have any podcast recs that are super easy for those of us with audio processing problems? For me specifically that means one voice (or maybe two if they’re very distinct) and minimal complexity in the soundscaping, though if you have recs that don’t fit those that you think might apply to other people w/ different audio processing issues you can talk about those too! :)

I can certainly try! I feel as though I should put it out there that I often have a difficult time gauging where a podcast sits re: audio processing/HOH listeners; the literal entirety of my day job is being good at telling what people are saying in audio, and my own audio processing problems mostly just result in my near-inability to keep up with actual plays, so if any of these are misjudgements on those terms I apologize in advance.

* means that I know there are also transcripts available for the podcast in question!

SAYER: scifi dark comedy/horror. In a morally questionable tech corporation’s moonbase facilities, advanced artificial intelligence SAYER directs employees about their daily routines; this then turns over time into possibly the best story about AI I’ve ever heard. Especially in the first three seasons, virtually all speaking is done by one voice. (Caveat that a few other characters come in later, and they’re actually all voiced by one guy with different filters, but the filters are pretty distinct and characters tend to identify themselves by default at the beginning of every conversation.)

*The Cryptonaturalist: comforting supernatural folksiness. The titular expert on all things strange and wonderful reads poetry, admires nature, and talks about wonderful creatures like foxes that live within library shelves, stick insects that camouflage themselves as whole trees, salamanders that swim in parking lot asphalt, and Owls.

*The Hidden Almanac: comforting supernatural weirdness. Hagiographer, avid gardener, and Mysterious Dude In Plague Doctor Getup known as Reverend Mord gives tidbits of the history of his strange and fantastical world, along with gardening advice. Sometimes his tequila-swigging accidental necromancer best friend coworker Pastor Drom shows up. Written by fantasy author Ursula Vernon and mostly voiced by her husband Kevin. Extremely relaxing to listen to; the show ended last year but they put out five-minute episodes three times a week for eight years so there’s plenty of it. The first year or so actually doesn’t appear on most podcatchers so maybe check out the website.

Everything Is Alive: poignant, heartfelt interviews with inanimate objects. While there’s a different object featured each episode, it’s mostly just them and the interviewer, plus occasional phone calls with an expert on some subject brought up during the interview. Hits so much harder than you could possibly imagine given the summary. You WILL be upset about a can of off-brand cola.

*Quid Pro Euro: bizarre comedy mockumentary. A satire of the European Union in the style of a set of instructional tapes for EU employees made in the ‘90s, predicting what the EU would look like in the 21st century. Their predictions are somewhat off. Only one voice and delightfully it is Felix Trench. I don’t know anything about the EU but I still think it’s hilarious.

*Glasgow Ghost Stories: spooky supernatural. A resident of Glasgow is unexpectedly able to see the many ghosts that reside in the city -- but the ghosts have started to notice her too, and not all of them are friendly. A beautiful and atmospheric single-voice show; plus the feed also contains the very good miniseries Tracks.

*Palimpsest: poetic and haunting. An anthology series about young women experiencing supernatural happenings, each 10-episode season tells a different story in monologue (I think there are literally two episodes with other voices in them). Poignant, gorgeous, and sometimes heartbreakingly sad in the best way. In season one Anneliese wonders about the strange neighbors at her new apartment. In season two, Ellen takes a new job as companion to a supposed fairy princess imprisoned in a strange showroom in turn of the century America. In season three, former codebreaker Josie begins to see the spirits of the dead on the streets of London during the Blitz.

*Within the Wires: alternate history scifi found footage. From a world where a calamitous global war resulted in the installation of a new Society where nations and family ties are banned, an anthology of voices telling their stories. Each season is a single voice. Season one, a set of relaxation tapes deliver unexpected instructions to a government prisoner in a strange medical facility. In sSeason two, a series of museum exhibit guides spin out the mystery of two artists and their work. In season three, a government employee dictates notes to his secretary and begins to suspect a plot. In season four, the traveling leader of a secretive cultlike commune leaves sermons for her followers, and instructions for her daughter.

*Alice Isn’t Dead: lesbian americana roadtrip weird horror. Keisha’s wife Alice was missing, presumed dead. Now Keisha is a trucker, traveling the vast American emptiness to seek her out; but she’s about to become embroiled in the same vast secret war that may have drawn away her wife, and she’s not alone on the roads. Starts with one voice, adds a new one each season for a total of three. Also is finished.

*Station Blue: psychological horror. Matthew takes a job as the lone caretaker of an Antarctic research station for several months. This goes about as well as you’d predict. Very much a slow burn, strange, brooding horror of isolation. Heavy themes of mental illness based on the creator’s experiences of bipolar disorder.

*Mabel: dark, poetic faerietale horror. Live-in caretaker Anna attempts to contact the absent granddaughter of her elderly employer, the lone resident of a strange and ancient house in Ireland. A love story, a haunted house story, a fairy tale with teeth. This one might be hit or miss; it sometimes tends to the abstract a bit, and there’s more soundscaping and some other occasional voices besides the main two protagonists. Definitely worth trying out, though, this is absolutely an underappreciated gem.

*Janus Descending: tragic scifi horror. Two researchers, Peter and Chell, travel alone to a distant planet to survey the ruins of its extinct civilization. Unfortunately, they discover exactly how that civilization died out. Excellent if you like movies like Alien, and also being extremely sad. Only two voices. Really unique story structure: it’s told via the two protagonists’ logs of the events, but you hear Chell’s logs in order, and Peter’s logs in reverse, with their perspectives alternating. The result is a tragedy where technically you know the ending from the start, but it’s told so cleverly that just what happened and how remains a tantalizing, tense, heartbreaking mystery right until the end.

*I Am In Eskew: poetic, surreal horror. Only two voices and few sound effects. David is a man trapped in the twisting, malevolent city of Eskew, where the rain always falls, streets seem to lead the same way twice, and nothing can be trusted. Riyo is an investigator, making her way through rumors and questions in search of a man long missing and a place that seems not to exist. Maybe my favorite horror media ever? Deeply disturbing and yet even the most awful things are somehow beautiful. Like if Lynch, Escher and Mieville had a terrible, wonderful baby.

*Tides: contemplative hard scifi. When biologist Dr. Eurus is wrecked alone on a distant alien world shaped by deadly tidal forces, her struggle to survive also becomes a meditative exploration of the ecosystem around her, and a recognition that here, she is the alien. Mostly it’s Dr. Eurus; sometimes you hear from her coworkers. It’s got Julia Schifini, what’s not to love?

*Midnight Radio: ghost story/romance. A 1950s radio host who broadcasts a late-night show to her small hometown begins to receive letters from a listener and respond to them on air. I wrote this! It has a total of three voice actors and virtually no soundscaping. I promise it’s good.

#podcast recs #bobbie recommends things #I hope this is useful!!#Anonymous #asks #my posts

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mysterykidscasefiles · 4 years

Text

Mystery Kids and the Case of the Whispering Rock

Summary: Norman, Neil, Coraline, Wybie, Raz and Lili arrive at Grunkle Stan’s Summer Camp with the hope of having a summer of fun, or in the case of the two Psychonauts, with the intent of investigating a psychic disturbance. When they meet two twins that seem to be experts on the secrets of Gravity Falls, they find themselves reluctantly teaming up. But how much can they actually trust each other? There are secrets in this town, but more surprising are the secrets being kept from each other.

Table of Contents

Chapter 23: Lost and Found

“What? B-but that’s not possible!” Wybie exclaimed as he stared flabbergasted at the old cabin in the giant tree. “We walked away from it! In a straight line! How can we be back here?”

Coraline placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “I know, Wyborn, believe me, I know.” Coraline looked miffed, but not quite as freaked out as her friend.

“This doesn’t make any sense!” Wybie continued in frustration. “I built this compass myself and we only traveled east! We couldn’t have made it back here!”

Dipper rubbed the bridge of his nose. “This happens sometimes, but don’t freak out. Actually, we’re lucky. In this forest, we could have ended up in worse places than here.”

“What do you mean?” Norman asked. “Has this happened to you before?”

“A few times,” Mabel said with a shrug. “It happens sometimes when we get lost or when we go too deep into the forest. It’s like the forest doesn’t want us to leave.”

Mabel’s tone was as cheerful as always and it seemed out of place for the situation. Raz wasn’t sure if it was comforting that she wasn’t worried, or if the girl just had an underdeveloped sense of danger.

“You two talk like the forest is alive or something,” Wybie said.

“It is alive, genius,” Lili said while rolling her eyes. “The forest is made out of trees and trees are alive.”

“That’s not what he meant, and you know it,” Coraline said, jumping to her friend’s defense. “He meant the twins talk like the forest has a conscience.”

“I wouldn’t go that far,” Dipper said, “But sometimes it sure seems like it… wants to keep us here.”

“What do you guys think we should do?” Norman asked the twins. “You two know the forest better than we do.”

“Well… we have to stop relying on our eyes,” Dipper said. “It’s only going to confuse us more.”

“And forget about common sense,” Mabel added. “It's useless here. Right is left and left is right. Backwards can be forwards and going in circles might as well be going straight.”

Dipper nodded. “The best thing to do would be to wait for nightfall so we can use the stars to guide us out. If we try and get out the conventional way then we’ll end up wandering around the forest until we pass out or get lost somewhere worse. We're lucky we keep coming back to this tree. One time Mabel and I wondered so far it became dark in the middle of the day.”

Mabel's smile faltered. "It wasn't a normal kind of darkness. There were no clouds or stars."

"How did you guys get out?" Neil asked with rapt attention.

Mabel glanced at Dipper, who has a far-off look in his eyes. “We’re not sure…” Dipper admitted. “To this day we still aren’t sure what happened. It was so dark that I couldn’t see Mabel even though she was standing right next to me. Luckily we had flashlights so we could walk without running into the trees. We were walking for about an hour, probably getting even more lost, when we heard a scratching sound coming to our left. When I shined the flashlight on where the noise came from we saw a small arrow scratched into the bark of the tree. It was fresh, so we knew something had just been right next to us when it had made the arrow.”

Did you follow the arrow?” Neil asked.

“We didn’t have much choice,” Dipper admitted. “Up to this point we were wandering aimlessly and I don’t think we could have gotten more lost. A few minutes later, we heard another scratching sound off to the side, but when we turned our flashlight towards it, we couldn’t see anyone. When we looked closer at the tree, there was another arrow carved in the bark. This continued to happen and we kept following the arrows until the sky started to lighten again and we could see the sun. No matter how hard we tried, we never saw who…. or what helped us.”

“I saw fur!” Mabel exclaimed eagerly. “I’m pretty sure whoever helped us had fur...I think. It was pretty dark.”

Dipper shrugged. “Those are the only things we have to go on. It might have had fur and it was obviously agile enough to avoid our flashlight.”

“You guys have seen a lot of strange things, haven’t you?” Raz asked thoughtfully.

“It’s this town,” Dipper admitted. “It’s weird… really weird. Mabel and I have seen things we can’t explain. I’ve been trying to learn as much as I can, but I didn’t want to drag you guys into it. As you can see, it can get dangerous.”

Raz entertained the possibility of searching through Dipper’s memories the way he had Coraline’s. There may be something in Dipper’s memories that would lead them to the disturbance they were searching for. However, something gave Raz pause.

He was still feeling guilty about the way he rummaged through Coraline’s memories and caused her to have a nightmare the previous night. He had wanted to find information that might lead him to the psychic disturbance, not to retraumatize her.

In addition, Raz didn’t really know what he was looking for. He knew Dipper and Mabel had seen weird things in the town, but would they really have information about the psychic disturbance they were looking for? There were also restrictions around looking through civilian memories, especially minors, Unless Raz had reason to believe they had information related to his mission, he wasn’t supposed to go through a civilian’s memories.

Raz decided that he would first try to ask Mabel and Dipper more questions about the mysterious things they have seen in Gravity Falls, as well as try and look around the town. If Raz discovered that Dipper or Mabel might know something related to the disturbance, and refused to share, then he would search through one of their memories.

“So, assuming we aren’t going to be saved by a potentially hairy monster that carves arrows into trees, what should we do?” Coraline asked.

“We are just getting ourselves more lost by wandering around,” Dipper said. “As much as I hate to be in this forest at night, we might have to wait for the stars to guide us out. That’s usually the safest way once we’re already lost.”

"We have to stay out here until it gets dark?” Wybie asked nervously, glancing around.

“I know it’s not the best plan,” Dipper agreed, sounding just as worried. “But it’s the only thing I can think of that wont get us more lost.”

“Actually, Lili is really good at reading a forest,” Raz spoke up. “The tree’s look different the farther you go in, and Lili can notice little differences like that. We don't have to wait. We can follow her out of here. After all, she was the one that knew we were going in the wrong direction from the very beginning.”

Lili didn’t react to Raz’s vote of confidence, but he could tell she was pleased. Raz knew Lili could use her herbaphony to get them back home easily.

At least, he hoped it would be easy. They had used a compass, gone straight, and still ended up back where they started.

“Hold on, it’s because of Lili we’re out here in the first place,” Coraline pointed out. "How can we trust her not to get us more lost?"

"Listen, Blue." Lili sneared. "I'm the only one that can get us out of here within the next few hours. So unless you want to wait until it gets dark and the Little Dipper can use the Big Dipper to get us home, then you'll shut your trap and follow me."

Coraline raised an eyebrow at Lili at the same time Mabel broke into a fit of giggles.

"Mabel, it wasn't that funny," Dipper said in annoyance.

"No Dip, it was hilarious!" Mabel choked out, barely able to breathe. “Little Dipper!”

"Well then..." Coraline said, a smile tugging on her lips. "I guess anything is better than nothing. Lead the way."

Lili turned around and walked past the giant tree. She was heading in the opposite direction they had been traveling in. There was hesitation from the group at first, but then everyone began following her. Raz tried to suppress the feeling inside of him that told him they were going the wrong way. He trusted Lili and she knew what she was doing.

Lili led them west, then north. Raz swore they passed the same trees that they had seen just minutes ago, but he kept quiet. There was one point where Lili led them around in what he thought was a definite circle only for them to end up in a completely new area.

Lili was frowning the entire time, a confused look on her face. She looked as lost as everyone else, but she seemed to put her faith in something other than her sense of direction.

They were traveling for a half an hour, but even Coraline held back her sarcastic commentary. Raz knew what Coraline was thinking without having to read her mind: Lili had either gotten them closer to home, or twice as lost.

Finally, the trees began to thin and Dipper let out a squeak of excitement. "I know where we are!" he shouted. "We're almost to the town!"

“How did you do that?” Neil asked Lili in awe.

“Like Raz said, I’m just really good at understanding plants,” Lili explained with a shrug.

“Man, it’s going to be so easy navigating the forest with you around!” Dipper said with a laugh.

Lili glanced at Dipper from the corner of her eyes, her eyebrows twitching upwards in surprise.

“Yeah, not bad Plant-girl,” Coraline said, nudging Lili with her shoulder playfully. “Looks like you are useful for something.”

“At least one of us is,” Lili said with a smirk.

Coraline rolled her eyes, but she was smiling. After a moment, Coraline’s expression faltered. “So umm…” she began awkwardly. “I guess I should have trusted you earlier when you said you knew the right way to go. That was my bad.”

Raz had a feeling that was as close to an apology that Lili was going to get, but from the look on Lili’s face, that was more than she had been expecting.

Lili shrugged. “Whatever, Blue. One of these days you’re going to figure out that I’m always right.”

Rax placed his arm around his girlfriend’s shoulders. “And if she’s ever wrong, we’ll get the bravest or the most gullible person we know to break the news to her, so the rest of us can run for cover.”

Lili gave him a shove. “Shut it, Raz!”

Raz chuckled, stumbling a bit. He grabbed Lili’s hand in his own as they walked, and she allowed him to. This was the first time Raz noticed that Lili was slowly starting to relax around the other kids.

Raz glanced at his girlfriend and then back at the other kids. Raz knew this mission wasn't anything like what he and Lili had expected. They went into this thinking it would be a simple recon mission. They were just supposed to find the psychic disturbance and report back to Agent Nein.

Now, they were no closer to finding the psychic disturbance, but they did find a ghost of a psychic kid with false memories, a blue haired girl who was being hunted by a terrifying otherworldly creature, a magic cabin that used to belong to witches, and an even stranger forest.

Raz hoped that whatever happened next, he and Lili would be able to handle it on their own, and the other kids wouldn’t get themselves involved. However, with this group’s track record for seeking out dangerous and unusual situations, Raz wasn’t holding his breath.

End of Act 1

I actually finished act 1? It’s been how many years and act 1 is finally complete?! I’m still having trouble believing it. This story still has two more acts to it. I have a lot of Act 2 written, but it was written a while ago, so I have to do a lot of rewriting. But at least I have a pretty good outline.

Thank you all for all your comments, they really keep me going and inspire me to continue to work on this story. Let me know what you guys thought of act 1.

If act 1 is all about meeting each other, then act 2 is about learning to trust each other, and act three… well, I wont say too much there.

If you want to support me, here is the link to my ko-fi

Table of Contents <Previous Next>

#Mystery Kids #Mystery Kids Case Files #gravity falls #coraline #paranorman #psychonauts #Whispering Rock fic

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itsthemysterykids · 2 years

Note

I haven’t had to do this in a while but…

(REBOOT PROTOCOL ENGAGED)

Now they’re Heroes in Training!

Warning: Using Mirage for too long can mess up her eyesight and make her see things that aren’t there

Warning: Cold weather does NOT help

Norman: With the power, Poltergeist, he has all the powers of a ghost. Telekinesis, intangibility, floating, possession, you name it.

Warning: Keep him away from ghost hunters and salt

Neil: Shield allows him to create up to twelve shields at once to protect himself and others from oncoming attacks. He can even arm them with spikes on the surface if he focuses hard enough.

Warning: Using too many shields at once for a long period of time can wear him out

Dipper: How power, Sleuth gives him the ability track anything and anyone down by revealing different colored trails if he thinks about what he’s looking for hard enough

Warning: This power requires a good memory of whatever it is he’s looking for. So maybe take a picture of anything that might be important

Mabel: Her power is called Knitting, and with it, she can create weapons, animals, even armor all with yarn.

Warning: She needs a few dozen balls of yarn, and using her power too much can give her carpel tunnel, so make sure she takes breaks

Raz: His power is Extend, making him super flexible, agile, and able to stretch his limbs to all sorts of lengths and contort his body in unnatural ways like those circus contortionists

Warning: He can get tangled very easily

Warning: Her allergies flare up when using her power for too long, so make sure she takes some medication

#coraline #mystery kids #paranorman #gravity falls #psychonauts #the mystery kids #ask stuff #answered ask #my hero academia #quirks

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nataliedanovelist · 4 years

Text

GF - Boxing

The beautiful, talented, amazing and wonderful @artsymeeshee has been going through a lot lately and I’ve been wanting to do something for her, so (since I can’t draw chibi Stans or think of a good fic that follows that theme XD ) I thought I would write this for her! Seriously, guys, she’s incredible in every way and deserves all the love in the world, so go give it to her!

I hope you like this fic, girl, and that you’re doing okay. - N.S.

~~~~~~~~~~

It all started back when the Pines family first arrived back at the Mystery Shack. Mabel was up in the storage room (It was much fuller than wise, but the attic was used as a bedroom at the moment.) and had dragged Dipper along with her to help find some old photographs. With only two weeks to work on her special birthday present for her grunkles, she needed all the help she could get in making them the perfect gift: a new scrapbook full of old photos of Glass Shard Beach and pictures Mabel had saved on her phone and was going to print of the old sailors out at sea.

Mabel had her hands on a box full of baby photos that she was totally going to use as blackmail. She squealed and then covered her mouth quickly so they wouldn’t get caught when she found a photo of two twin boys sitting in little sailor-suits on their parents’ bed. The one with six-fingers on his tiny fists didn’t look happy, but his brother was laughing and was proud of his new suit. Mabel tucked it into her folder to use for the scrapbook and checked another box. She opened it and was surprised to find news articles for boxing events and pictures of her uncles training. “Wow, Dipper, look.” Mabel said quietly and Dipper sat with her by the box. “Whoa, Stan was really good.” The boy commented as he picked up photographs of a bruised-looking, war-beaten, teenage-version of Stan had a fist up in the air in victory and a trophy in his grasp. Ford was by his side, enjoying stealing Stan’s gimmick of wrapping an arm around his neck and pointing at him as he beamed with pride. “Check out all these first places.” “Wonder where all his trophies…” But then Mabel stopped. There were boxes in this room labeled “trophies”, but all of those were Ford’s from science fairs and spelling bees, because this had originally been his house. Since Stan was kicked out and didn’t exactly have time or space for memorabilia, the trophies were long-gone, probably tossed out by Dipper and Mabel’s great-grandfather. Mabel’s blood boiled and her teeth clenched in a very un-Mabel way. “If I ever see Blendin again, I’m using his time-machine to go back in time and punch that jerk in the face.” She growled. “Yeah,” Dipper sighed and held out some good pictures of when both of the twins were boxing in elementary school. “But hey, these will look great in the new scrapbook.” He pointed out, trying to make his sister forget Filbrick. It worked; Mabel smiled and took some of the pictures. “These are great, thanks!” And she added them to the folder. “They look so cute! And they look like they might be having fun.” Dipper shrugged; to this day Stan still enjoys watching a match and he still gave awesome left and right-hooks. “So, do you need more pictures, or…?” “I think… I dunno, I was hoping to find one of them with Grandpa or Ma Pines. Do you think they’d want that?” Even after the scrapbook had been made and delivered, Mabel still thought back to Stan and Ford’s old boxing days. It was interesting and cool to her, so one afternoon she asked Stan to teach her some moves. She had never seen that old man look so happy. (Except when he announced that he was going to be sailing around the world with Ford.) He took her out to the backyard and taught her how to take a proper stance and how to give good hooks and how to dodge properly. Mabel found she liked the feeling of the gloves and the poses and moves came relatively quickly to her. By the time the sun was setting Stan was laughing and calling her a natural. About a week or so later, Stan left his newspaper on the table to help put out a small fire Ford had started due to an experiment gone bad, and Mabel saw an ad for boxing tryouts. There was a team right outside of Gravity Falls and the whole thing was over by the end of the summer, so Mabel could join if she wanted. When Stan came back and finished his newspaper, he put it in the newspaper bin (used to start campfires or for arts-n’-crafts) and Mabel swiped the article for the date, time, and location. Dipper woke up the next morning and found Mabel’s bed, as usual, empty. But then as Dipper was scrubbing his eyes he heard something weird outside. He looked out the window and stared to find Mabel in pink work-out shorts, a white t-shirt, and her hair up with a scrunchie as she punched a tree with boxing gloves. Dipper slipped on some shoes and his hat and vest and hurried outside. “Mabel, what are you doing?” He asked when he got behind her out in the crisp morning air. “Training for the boxing tryouts.” Mabel said as she worked, punching a tree so hard a branch fell off. Dipper smiled proudly and said, “I wanna help.” And so history repeated itself as Dipper hurried to the library after breakfast and found books on proper diet techniques and he looked up video-tutorials on great workout routines. He rode his bike besides Mabel and used her megaphone to cheer her on as she jogged down the dirt road. He wore a full on pillow-bodysuit so Mabel could punch something that moves and tries to punch back. Dipper even made her protein shakes with raw eggs and other stuff to help her keep her energy and he poured her Mabel Juice down the drain, earning him a raspberry courtesy of his twin. The kids were careful to keep it a secret, Mabel insisting she wanted to surprise Stan and Ford by coming back with a real boxing uniform and a declaration that she made the team. Dipper supported her one million percent and on the day of the tryouts, they hopped on a bus for the gym. Dipper walked with Mabel in her workout-gear, hands in his vest and a proud smile on his face. They walked into the correct room, the one with a big ring and some bleachers, and found Mr. Poolcheck’s cousin, Mr. Boxcoach. The cousins had the same tight-face, sharp jawline, and popping vein, and they were both equally scary, but Mr. Boxcoach’s legs weren’t skinny and perfect for swimming, rather bulky and perfect for boxing, and he had oily brown hair. He wore a blue-jacket over a white t-shirt and he had a whistle around his neck and a clipboard in hand. Boys from neighboring towns were there to try out, too, and more were approaching. Mabel and Dipper walked up to Mr. Boxcoach to properly introduce themselves and before any of them said a word, the scary man asked with his eyes down at his clipboard, “What’s your name, son?” “Oh, no,” Dipper shook his head and patted Mabel’s shoulder. “I’m not here to try out, but my sister is.” “Hi! I’m Mabel.” She said cheerfully, almost bouncing where she stood with excitement. Mr. Boxcoach finally looked at them and snorted. “Yeah, no. I’m not putting a girl on my team.” Mabel’s smile dropped. Dipper saw the devastated look on her face and he had to try extremely hard not to lose his temper. “Why not?” He asked. “Whaddya mean, why not, she’s a girl.” Mr. Boxcoach said like it was obvious and he tucked his clipboard under his arm. “I mean look at her, a butterfly clip in her hair and a bright-pink scrunchie. They’d eat her alive out there.” “So what if she takes good care of her hair and likes pink?” Dipper snapped. “Last I checked, that has nothing to do with how good she is. She’s really tough, just let her try, she’s got a great left-hook!” “Listen, kids, it’s anarchy out there…” “She can handle it!” “... there is no way I’m letting a girl on my team.” Mr. Boxcoach said firmly. “I wouldn’t be caught dead with a girl in my boxing ring.” Dipper narrowed his eyes, seeing red, his whole body shaking with rage. “You won’t even let her try out?” “Nope.” Dipper was ready to yell and make Mr. Boxcoach rue the day he underestimated Mabel Pines, but one glance at her told Dipper that she looked ready to go home, so he put an arm around her shoulders and walked her out the door. “Forget that jerk. Wanna stop by that new candy store in town? I think they have a new safer Smile-Dip.” He offered softly. Mabel shook her head and pulled her hair down, her scrunchie on her wrist. “I’d rather just go home.” “Okay, sure.” Dipper tried to smile comfortingly at her, but she wouldn't meet his eyes and Dipper could tell that she didn’t need smiles right now. ~~~~~~~~~~ Waddles was asleep under the card table while Ford and Stan played poker on the table. Ford slammed his cards down as his brother laughed maliciously and scooted the loot to his side of the table. “You cheated!” “Probably, wanna try to prove it, Wise Guy?” Stan dared. “Oh, you little…” The door opened and closed and the old men smiled to see the kids return, but they were unhinged to find Mabel in unusual attire and hurrying up the stairs with tears in her eyes. The bedroom door slammed shut and Waddles woke up and trotted up the stairs. “What’s wrong with Mabel?” Stan asked. Dipper sighed and collapsed in the armchair. “Mabel wants to be on the boxing team.” Ford and Stan exchanged proud and surprised looks, but they also remembered that their little girl was upset right now. “Did she not make the team?” Ford guessed sympathetically. “She didn’t even get to try out.” “Why not?” Stan pressed on when Dipper fell silent and didn’t look in a hurry to tell more of the story. He gave them both a careful look, like he was debating if it was worth telling them, but he eventually said, “Coach says he wouldn’t be caught dead with a girl in his ring.” “WHAT?!” Stan stood up quickly and looked just as mad as he did back when he discovered that Mable and Gideon were dating last summer. “And you were okay with that?!” “Stanley,” Ford scolded lightly, not enjoying the fact that he was assuming Dipper didn’t do anything about it. “No! I tried, but there was no changing his mind.” Dipper defended and crossed his arms over his chest. Stan marched across the room. Ford stood up and asked, “Where are you going?” “To be mad at somebody new!” “Uh, oh.” Dipper said as Stan angry beyond reason. When Mabel heard Waddles scratching at the door, she forced herself out of bed to let him in. He hopped up on the foot of the bed and let Mabel lie her head on him and cry on his soft pink body. She hugged him and cried her heart out, disappointed and feeling stupid for thinking she even had a shot at boxing like her hero. A soft knock came at the door and Mabel looked up to find Stan at the door. She quickly wiped her tears away and her face dry; she didn’t want him to see her cry and think she wasn’t tough anymore. “Hey, everything okay, pumpkin?” Mabel smiled weakly and nodded. “Yeah, I’m okay…” “C’mon, Mabel, you can’t lie to an old conman.” Stan said and sat by the head of her bed. “Plus Dipper told me what happened.” He added, unable to take all the credit on him just being that awesome and smart. Mabel’s eyes filled with tears and she shut her eyes to try to hide it. Stan wrapped an arm around her shoulders and rubbed. “Snitch.” Mabel mumbled, making Stan snort. “I wanted to surprise you, make you proud.” “Whoa, hey,” Stan halted. “First off, I’ll always be proud of you. Always. You’re my little fight, whether you’re on some stupid team or not. That’s sweet that you wanted to surprise me and rub it in my face that you’re way better at boxing than me, but you don’t have to hide anything from me.” Mabel hiccuped a laugh over his little joke and she wiped her tears on her arm, feeling much better. “Thanks, Grunkle Stan.” “No problem, sweetie.” He looked her dead in the eye and asked, “Do you really wanna box?” Mabel wasn’t sure if he was asking because he wanted to make sure she didn’t want to box only to make him proud, or he was about to do something stupid. Either way, she wanted to be honest. She nodded and gave that Pines-gleam in her eye, the one that promised trouble and was fed off of determination, pride, and hard-work. “Yeah, I do. But the coach…” “I don’t care, get your gloves and let’s go.” Stan motioned a hand for her to follow and she did as she was told, following her great-uncle out of the room and eventually out of the house. ~~~~~~~~~~ Luckily the tryouts were only half done when Stan had Mabel’s hand and was walking her back inside the room. Her soft brown eyes found the scary Mr. Boxcoach and her hand tightened around Stan’s. “That’s him.” “I got this.” Stan muttered back. “OY! Veins! You and I need to talk!” Mr. Boxcoach had to whistle a match to stop and he turned to the new arrivals that stood outside his ring. Stan climbed up swiftly and had his hands on his hips, a suave, strong man in a suit looking deadly with cold brown eyes and tight fists just right for throwing a good punch. The atmosphere got ten degrees colder as Mr. Boxcoach realized he had talked badly about Stanley Pines’s girl. “Yes, sir?” He asked casually. “You tell my grandniece she can’t box?!” “Oh, well I was only looking after her…” “Well she doesn’t need you to look after her! She can look after herself and do a better job at it than most grown-ups!” Mabel, meanwhile, was turning pink with pride. “And you’re gonna give her the same chance you would give any other boy!” “Or what?” Mr. Boxcoach snarled. “Or we’re gonna have problems.” Stan growled and even Mabel felt a shiver go down her spine. Despite being the same size, Mr. Boxcoach looked significantly smaller than Stan. Mr. Boxcoach swallowed and then huffed, “Fine. Kid, you’re next. You’ll go against Drake.” “What?!” The pale sandy-haired kid with freckles yelled. He was one of the two already in the ring. “I’m not boxing with a girl!” “Why not, your friend is.” Mabel snapped. Stan swelled with pride and the other boy, a dark-skinned boy with brown curls, “oh”ed with a smile and said he’d fight her. Stan patted her back and said, “I’ll be in the bleachers. Kick their butts.” ~~~~~~~~~~ Ford and Dipper were watching the Used To Be About History Channel when Stan and Mabel came back home with huge smiles on their faces. “Guess who’ll be in boxing matches this summer?” “Mabel, that’s wonderful!” Ford cheered and gave her a hug when she hopped up on his lap in the armchair. “Congratulations! I’m so proud of you.” “Me, too.” And Dipper ruffled her hair from the dino-skull end table. “I knew you’d make the team!” “And I got a date!” Mabel added joyfully and punched the air in victory. “You did?” Ford asked, bewildered how boxing could lead to romance. He looked at his brother for clarification. “She did?” “It was a productive afternoon.” Stan simply said as he hung his suit jacket up. ~~~~~~~~~~ Mabel climbed up into the ring, her hair up in her pink scrunchie and her little butterfly pinning back her hair so she could see her opponent. She wore red and the enemy wore yellow, like gold without the sparkle. She narrowed her eyes and gritted her teeth, taking her stance. The big, nasty boy with crooked teeth snarled at her, ready to take her apart, free to dominate and humiliate a girl, but that wasn’t going to happen. Just before the bell rang, Mabel glanced over to the bleachers and saw her boys screaming and cheering her on. They had painted their faces red with a white stripe down the center and Stan wore his red Hawaiian shirt, Ford his turtleneck solo, and Dipper held a sign that read “GO MABEL GO!” in big red letters with stars all over it and tons of glitter. He cleared his throat mid-shout and coughed up glitter, proof that he had made the sign himself. Mabel grinned and focused on the scummy teenager in front of her. The bell rang.

#GF #gravity falls #boxing #mabel pines #stan pines #everybody love protective stan #artsymeeshee #fanfiction #seriously thank you so much for always making me smile #or cry #that's good too

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