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tomorrow-and-tomorrows · 3 years

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Narrative perspective and how cursed techniques become worlds: Gojou Satoru

In a key moment when theorizing about the nature of soul and body, the Brain speculates that “techniques dictate our worlds”. One of the other ways in which technique = world becomes literalized is through the narrative perspective from which we see characters.

Perspective, or point of view, determines our angle of vision through which to perceive character and story. It shapes representation and determines both how and what we are allowed to see.

Gojou

Gojou’s default technique is Limitless, which brings forth the distance that makes it impossible for objects in the world to reach him; neutral Limitless puts an uncrossable distance between himself and the world.

In the one-year timeskip after Riko Amanai’s death, it’s precisely as he’s learning to have his Limitless activated at all times that he and Geto become unable to reach each other. As Gojou’s power increases to sustain this invisible space, an uncrossable distance opens up between the person who was closest to him.

But I think there’s an additional distance that opens up as Gojou’s technique strengthens: The narrative distance preventing access to Gojou’s direct perspective and interiority after the Hidden Inventory Arc.

In contrast to how we were plunged into Geto’s intense introspection, there is nothing of Gojou’s internal thoughts from the immensely important turning point of the Premature Death chapters to ch.79 when he approaches Megumi. During these chapters, his Limitless technique defines his “world” both within the story (physically and interpersonally/emotionally), and on this meta-level of narration.

From then on, Geto and the readers can only observe Gojou from the outside: his inner mind becomes inaccessible and unreachable. So much so that, as readers, we might feel the absence distinctly as if part of the story after the Hidden Inventory arc and during Premature Death arc is altogether missing or incomplete.

In order to understand his words and expressions here, we are required to interpret, to try to bridge that impenetrable space that never lets us get any closer to Gojou. These two moments in particular illustrate this narrative distance, again as the most defining moments of his life, yet we are left looking on from the outside, ever held at a distance from his actual mind.

These two moments are the most defining moments of his life - dealing with losing Geto, and the first step he takes to dedicating his life to raising young allies through education. These moments are angled very similarly; our angle of vision is to look at Gojou, not through Gojou’s perspective.

We get physically close to Gojou’s eyes as possible, but that is the limit: there is a silence, an uncrossable space between us and his interiority. We never get so close as to access his inner thoughts when it is most important. It feels almost impersonal, alienating as readers to not be privy to these turning points in his worldview.

And it’s not just the case in these two singular moments, but the entire situation after the Hidden Inventory arc. How did Gojou emotionally process Riko’s death? What was on his mind during the time he was sent on solo missions no longer accompanied by Geto? How did he feel about Haibara’s death? How much of Geto’s psychological state was he really aware of? How did his reflections on Toji’s last words lead to him reaching out to Megumi?

It’s also the narrative method after he kills Geto in the prequel: we are shut out from his private emotions, only able to see what he chooses to reveal to the external world - nothing more than an inscrutable smile and a brief expression of affection for the person he had just killed. Does he feel guilt? Acceptance? What were his emotions in the moments after Geto’s death? We are denied access to these answers.

Similarly, many of those above questions about the post-Inventory arc situation will never be definitively answered in the way of internal monologue. However, many of them are implicitly answered, just not in a conventional, straightforward way. Rather than understanding him by being able to access his interiority, we are required to construct an understanding of him based on his external actions.

“Narrative says less than it knows, but it often makes known more than it says.” - Gérard Genette, Narrative Discourse

His response to failing to save Riko, to killing Toji, to Geto leaving, and so on -- we see how nearly all his subsequent actions are haunted by and in response to all these events. We don’t get internal monologue recounting what he feels, but we can try to discern how he feels in everything that he does, every decision that he makes throughout the rest of the story. Becoming an educator, finding meaning through raising allies to connect with, saving Megumi from the Zen’in clan, saving Yuta and Yuji from execution, endorsing Maki’s ambition to transform the Zen’in family, seeking change through education rather than violence, shouldering the balance of the both the jujutsu and human world--

In all of these decisions, we get as close to answer as possible of what he feels in response to the personal catastrophes of his youth that he had silently endured: above all, a deep sense of responsibility and a profound internalization of the experiences and painful lessons that come to define his entire life.

It is also no coincidence that, in Shibuya Arc, it is at the same moment the Prison Realm is able to physically overcome the distance of his Limitless technique, that this narrative distance established in chapters 76-79 is crossed for the first time in a meaningful way.

Throughout his fight with Jogo and Hanamai, we do get a some of his internal thoughts, but it’s for the practical purpose of knowing what his strategical deductions are; they tell us nothing substantial about his emotions, hence not what I consider a ‘meaningful’ overcoming of distance.

But as his Limitless utterly fails to prevent the Prison Realm from seizing him, suddenly that object in the world is able to reach him, and the narrative is simultaneously able to ‘reach’ his mind to a greater extent than before. Whilst he had previously successfully shut everything out, now he is suddenly permeable both in body and mind.

More precisely, what I’ve been calling this ‘narrative distance’ is crossed immediately before the physical distance is eliminated. The emotional distance is actually breached before the physical, but ultimately these two results are inseparable from each other.

Finally, we begin to understand directly, through just a momentary glimpse into his interiority, how strongly he feels the loss of his best friend, how present and alive those years of his youth are constantly in his mind. Seeing Suguru’s face after being emotionally and physically drained by his fight is what exposes his vulnerability, a weakness of the heart that we wouldn’t even be sure was still there until this moment.

It’s the delayed emotional insight into Gojou that makes it all the more poignant; we’re well past his Past arc, but it’s only now that we become privy to how heavily those events weigh on his mind. On a first reading, it would require us to slightly re-write what we would’ve understood of Gojou solely based on the previously distant, impersonal feeling we got from those past chapters.

The final major implication of what I’ve been suggesting is how, in light of all this, how to think about the effect of the last real substantial access to his inner thoughts/emotions.

The last meaningful unmediated access we get to Gojou’s inner thoughts/emotions during his Past Arc is this moment when he renounces human emotion and apologizes to Riko for feeling like he’s no longer fighting for her sake.

Even though this is a powerful, lasting impression of his inner mind for readers, it is not the case that this moment of egoism, self-centredness, and renunciation of compassion is completely who Gojou Satoru remains even as an adult. Gojou definitely retains some of those traits in his personality - I don’t want to overlook the extent of his individualistic mentality, self-involvement, and difficulty emotionally considering others. However, his actions in the aftermath of this spiritual transcendence demonstrate that this moment and those characteristics do not define his entire person at the expense of all others.

Again: the narrative distance that deliberately denies readers access to his inner mind after the Hidden Inventory Arc requires us to evaluate his character based on his subsequent actions that demonstrate his movement away from this emotionless, compassionless state, towards motivations that are highly emotionally driven.

Although this renunciation of human emotion and obligation towards Riko is the last substantial thought we receive from Gojou’s direct point of view, his character has not remained static since that temporary moment. On the contrary, he develops drastically from that, though we witness this change from the outside: the Gojou Satoru we see after the one-year timeskip and ten years later in the present day is a largely different Gojou Satoru than the one who feels no anger on behalf of a child he’d failed to protect - and the only way we can understand this when his mind is largely closed off to us is through looking at his external actions.

For example, in stark juxtaposition to his apology to Riko for not feeling anger or vengefulness, not only does Gojou immediately after think of killing the cult members to avenge her death, a large part of his philosophy as a teacher is founded on anger on behalf of children whose youth are threatened to be cut short. We get this primarily through external speech and action.

We do not experience his anger, realization of the value of working together with allies rather than exclusively as an individual, or decision to save children like Yuta and Yuji through a step-by-step psychological progression: we only see the end results of all that development that certainly occurs, but is hidden from us.

For such a major character, I find this a fascinating method that might run contrary to our expectations of how to portray and understand character development. It requires a greater degree of interpretation about the internal thought and emotional processes that, though not brought to the surface of the narrative, are at the foundation of his external actions, speech, and expressions throughout the story.

“Narrative 'representation', or, more exactly, narrative information, has its degrees: the narrative can furnish the reader with more or fewer details, and in a more or less direct way, and can thus seem to keep a greater or lesser distance from what it tells." - Gérard Genette

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk meta #gojo satoru

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horde-princess · 4 years

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A Meta on Catra’s Relationships with DT, Scorpia, and Adora

I’m so excited to write this finally ljsdflkj okay so. I’ve been thinking about why the creators would choose to center a whole season around this new character Double Trouble. They drove the plot and played a major role in a really important part of the story, Catra’s redemption. So I wanna think more about the purpose of this character and go deeper into a couple of their scenes with Catra.

tbh Catra and DT’s very first interaction says it all: DT literally takes the form of Scorpia and tells Catra “I’m about to become your new best friend.” As the season goes on, Double Trouble replaces Scorpia as a sort of artificial confidant for Catra. But it blows up in her face and the purpose of the whole thing is to shed light on Catra’s main internal conflict: her desire for love vs. her fear of heartbreak/vulnerability.

In other words, I believe Double Trouble was introduced as a foil to Scorpia. But if we think about how Scorpia is also a foil to Adora, then that means DT is like... a foil to a foil. So they’re not directly associated with Adora but a lot of what they do relates back to her. Yeah there are a lot of layers here lmao but basically what I’m gonna analyze is how Catra’s relationships with these three characters intertwine and build off each other in season 4 to set the stage for Catra’s redemption (and catradora endgame hollaaa)

So in the beginning, Catra and DT both understand their relationship to be a business arrangement. When does that start to change for Catra, and why?

Catra’s History With Betrayal

Just think about Catra’s relationships at the start of s4.. After the portal, Adora had basically severed whatever was left of their relationship, and that was shown to be weighing on Catra all season. Scorpia and Entrapta were the only other people she cared about, but Entrapta betrayed her (first by monopolizing Hordak’s attention then by refusing to open the portal), then Scorpia dared to question her decision to send their friend to die and her presence became a constant reminder of Catra’s guilt. In fact, the mere mention of Entrapta’s name in 4x03 causes Catra to snap and yell at Scorpia “we are not friends!” ... which of course isn’t true. Catra may think Scorpia’s annoying but she confided in her, her loyalty made Catra feel like she could trust her.. and that’s exactly why Catra always tried so hard to push her away. All the betrayals in her life scarred her so deeply that she wanted to avoid emotional intimacy at all costs. I’m about to get Jungian up in this shit bc we see a deep disconnect between Catra’s outward actions (her conscious) and her inner desires (subconscious) this season and it’s this i believe that leads to her breakdown in 4x10. It’s an unsustainable way to live.

Why Catra Trusted Double Trouble

So by 4x04, Catra had sabotaged her only two relationships. She was utterly alone, and vulnerable, and Double Trouble was in the right place at the right time offering their loyalty to her.. so Catra did what any emotionally stable person would do and subconsciously used a hired mercenary to try and fill the growing void in her heart. I don’t think Catra actually cared about DT much at all, like sure they got along and that matters on some level, but I think it’s more that Catra was in a vulnerable place and DT was the only one around.

So why does Catra trust Double Trouble when she won’t let herself trust anyone else? I’ve seen some posts saying it’s because Catra is self-destructive--i.e. she only seeks love from people who won’t give it to her because she doesn’t believe she deserves love--which is super true.. but I think her motivations can be better explained by saying that Catra knew from the start that Double Trouble didn’t really care about her, and that’s why the partnership was attractive to her (at first). She thought it would be safe--no vulnerability, no risk of heartbreak. But the truth is Catra’s just not as disaffected as she wishes she was.

The moment Catra really let her guard down was when Double Trouble saved her from the collapsing building in 4x04.

can we just!! talk about this scene!!!! the way her voice shakes when she says “saving me” just, oh my god... like what a touchy subject for her, right? Shes spent her whole life resenting how Adora was always trying to “save” her from everything. I’m not sure but I think White Out (2x05) was the only other time Catra thanked someone for saving her life, and she just says “thanks for getting us out of there.” So her use of the word “save” here is special and it illustrates how deeply vulnerable Catra feels this season, and more importantly it’s a sign of character development! It’s no coincidence that the theme of saving is connected between DT, Scorpia, and Adora. It’s leading up to Catra learning to replace her resentment towards Adora with something closer to gratitude.

But while the scene connects these relationships, it also highlights their differences. After Catra displays an astounding amount of vulnerability with DT, they coolly reply “well, I live to serve... for a price, of course.”

This right here is the first step of Catra’s breakdown. Suppressed desires making themselves known, one half of her heart rebelling against the other. She was pushing away her real friends and finding hollow companionship with someone she thought she wouldn’t get attached to, but it happened anyway.

The difference between Double Trouble and Scorpia must have become glaringly obvious to Catra in that moment. Whereas Scorpia was loyal to Catra out of love, DT was mostly interested in getting paid. And she was surprised by how much that hurt. She fucking hated how much it hurt, you can see it written all over her face. It’s why she fails Scorpia’s little test in 4x06. Because of Double Trouble, Catra’s true desires were threatening to break free, so outwardly she fights against it and acts more resistant than ever to being friends with Scorpia. She castigates her, calls her annoying and incompetent, harsher than we’ve ever seen... but she didn’t expect Scorpia to hit back (we did, tho. Scorpia’s an icon).

In four words Scorpia teaches Catra a hard lesson about what it means to earn someone’s loyalty. She knew she must’ve really fucked up if she somehow managed to push away the most loyal person in all of Etheria. And again the fake nature of Catra’s relationship with Double Trouble provides a reference for her to see why Scorpia’s loyalty, based in love, was so valuable, and why she shouldn’t have taken it for granted. It also relates to Adora because, similar to Scorpia, Adora had been trying so hard these past 3 seasons to connect with Catra, but she refused to forgive her and her behavior eventually forced Adora to cut ties. So Scorpia calling her out pushes Catra towards accepting some personal responsibility for everything that happened with Adora, too. Man there are just.. a ton of implications here.

Then Catra gives Hordak a fun pep talk but really it’s just her self-projecting all over him:

At this point her hateful actions and her goal to conquer Etheria are extremely out of line with her true desires and we can see it’s really affecting her mental state. It wasn’t just one thing or person that caused her breakdown, it was a combination of Adora severing their relationship, and Scorpia’s disappointment in her, and Double Trouble’s indifference towards her. All three of these situations were playing off each other and chipping away at Catra’s carefully crafted armor, revealing a desire to be loved hidden underneath... which she continued to fight against for as long as she could. Adora and Scorpia were playing their roles in helping Catra learn to take responsibility for her life, but those relationships wouldn’t have been so effective had it not been for how they were contrasted with Double Trouble’s indifference. Anyway have I mentioned how amazing and complex this show is????

Catra Loses DT and Scorpia Around the Same Time

4x07 is the last time Catra talks to Double Trouble before they get captured by the rebels. Coincidentally, Catra realizes that Scorpia left her just one episode later, which once again points to a connection between these two characters. From 4x08 to 4x11 Catra is completely alone, feeling like she has lost everyone in her life. It sets the stage for her meltdown in 4x10. But my fave part about Scorpia leaving is how it changes the way Catra thinks about betrayal.

Even if Scorpia didn’t tell Catra where she was going in the note she left, Catra had to have assumed she was leaving to join the Rebellion because where else would she have gone right? So the two people Catra loves most have now BOTH abandoned her to join the rebellion. I don’t even wanna think about how triggering that betrayal must have been for Catra.. I don’t wanna think about how the next time Catra sees Scorpia she’s going to be a full blown princess with powers and everything, just like what happened with Adora.

But there’s a key difference between Adora and Scorpia. Catra knows at this point that Adora didn’t want to leave her behind, but she did anyway to pursue some destiny that Catra wasn’t a part of, which left her feeling betrayed. Scorpia, on the other hand--the very definition of ‘loyalty’--left her specifically because Catra pushed her away. Her fear of vulnerability manifested as anger towards someone she refused to admit that she cared about, and it pushed her away.

Once again I think Scorpia is teaching Catra a lesson about taking responsibility for some of the shit in her life. It’s a privilege that Adora lost after being careless with Catra’s trust, and thus Scorpia was the only one in a position to reach Catra and help her. But I think that the things Catra learned from Scorpia are going to play back into her relationship with Adora and allow them to reconcile (when Adora deals with her own issues too).

We can also say a little about how Double Trouble’s betrayal contrasts with Scorpia’s and Adora’s. I think their complete emotional detachment is the perfect frame of reference for Catra to be able to acknowledge that even though Scorpia and Adora left her, they DID love her, and they never stopped trying to reach out to her--at least, not until Catra crossed a line with both of them. At some point, Catra went from being justified in her feelings of betrayal to overdoing it, placing too much blame where it didn’t belong and closing the door to forgiveness. So I think that’s the role that Double Trouble played there, helping Catra see that difference. Like even if someone leaves you, hurts you, it doesn’t always mean they don’t love you. Relationships take work and understanding and forgiveness and you have to learn how to handle that or you’ll always be alone. Scorpia’s the pure embodiment of that lesson, and she’s lighting the way for Catra to navigate the much more nebulous waters of her grudge against Adora.

Double Trouble’s Betrayal

So now Catra is feeling abandoned by Scorpia and Double Trouble (her only friends) and we see the disconnect between what’s in her heart and the front she’s been putting on come to a head in 4x10 when she has that meltdown. She’s kind of losing it because her fear and heartbreak are driving her down a path that she doesn’t actually want. It’s like watching a car crash in slow motion. In 4x12 she continues to hold on desperately to the idea that beating Adora will make her happy, because at this point she doesn’t see any way to turn the car around.

There’s an absolutely fantastic scene early in 4x12 that sets up Double Trouble’s betrayal beautifully, like really it’s a masterpiece. Catra’s childhood friends walk in on her in the locker room and they’re laughing and joking around and for a second it’s like... Catra longs to be a part of that again.. To have friends, to be happy. But then Kyle accidentally kicks one of Scorpia’s old doodles (a painful reminder that she’s gone) and Catra freaks out and attacks them. Kyle’s like “we used to be friends, why are you treating us like this?” So she lets them leave, feeling alone and miserable, and THAT’S when Double Trouble waltzes in... having had just made a deal with Glimmer to double cross Catra.

God it hurts so much. The contrast between her pushing away Scorpia and her real friends, and then her childlike relief upon seeing the person who just sold her out.

This scene gives me fucking chills with the nightmare-ish music and everything.. It’s like, at this point DT is just fucking with her, they’ve already got Catra figured out. This face touch is so cruel and fits with the show’s motif of manipulative affection, too. For me it felt very disconcerting to see Catra like this... unaware that she’s been defeated yet she’s so emotionally vulnerable here, she’s like putty in Double Trouble’s hands. Scorpia leaving cracked her open and, as they’re the last person left standing with Catra’s trust, Double Trouble’s in the perfect position to come in and break her.

So the next episode 4x13 has that crazy scene where Double Trouble totally obliterates Catra and I’m not even gonna talk about it lmao because yall have already done a great job analyzing it. But I do wanna draw attention to the fact that this is the only thing she says in this whole scene:

Can you believe that’s what mattered the most to her in that moment? Not that literally everything she had been working for for the past 4 seasons had just turned to dust before her eyes, but the fact that this random mercenary she hired betrayed her. And there was no anger at all, just... heartbreak.

And then look at what she says to Glimmer afterwards (setting aside the fact that Catra is basically giving up on life...) she says nothing about the war, nothing about winning or revenge. The only thing she’s thinking about is how lonely she feels.

So by the end of Season 4, I think Catra did finally figure out what she truly wanted in life. She didn’t want to be on top just for power’s sake, she wanted people to respect her, to love her, so that no one could hurt her anymore. But she was so obsessed with winning that she ended up losing everyone’s respect. Wow haha if only she could get a second chance to earn it back the right way.... like say if, idk, she was trapped in space jail and forced to team up with her sworn enemy to survive and they came out best friends or something <:)

To sum up, Double Trouble’s role in Season 4 was to break Catra’s mask and force her to consider what she truly wants. I think their betrayal taught Catra to really appreciate what a terrible mistake she made in pushing Scorpia and Adora away. It taught her the difference between someone leaving her because they don’t care about her, and someone cutting ties with her even though they do care for her very deeply, they just couldn’t take Catra treating them like crap anymore. It showed her that what Adora did was nothing like what DT did. That’s what a betrayal feels like when the person doesn’t care about you. Someone who doesn’t care about you isn’t going to beg for your forgiveness for 3 seasons and risk being obliterated from existence just to get you back.

But the real beauty of season 4 was how Catra hitting rock bottom had almost nothing to do with Adora. With the help of other friends Catra has begun to find her own reasons to change, she’s acknowledging her guilt and heartbreak and discovering the person she wants to become. She’s learning to take responsibility instead of just blaming other people. And this character development had nothing to do with romance, just like how Adora breaking free of her destiny and learning to let go of control had little to do with Catra. I love the different perspectives on love that they give us with Catra, Adora, and Scorpia. I love how this show takes the “love conquers all” trope and subverts it, saying that sometimes.. love breaks you. Sometimes it’s not enough. Sometimes it’s used as a weapon. Sometimes you have to let go of people you love, but it opens up space for you to figure out who you are and what you want and to conquer your own demons. You’ll come out the other side with a better understanding of what real, healthy love is supposed to look like. And maybe in the end, the love you always sought will find you again, in its own time, in its own way. 💘

#OK THIS IS... A LOT. EVEN FOR ME LMAO #she ra #meta #season 4 is my fave so far i just had a lot of feelings to work through ok #would love to hear what yall think xoxo happy new year's!!

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allycryz · 4 years

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Nerys Eluned: Canon Jobs

Background

Nerys spent her childhood with a community of Duskwight in the South Shroud until she was twelve. Her parents moved first to the Central Shroud, later to the East. Prior to ARR, she had never left the Shroud.

Her father handled her academic education with a bent towards reading and history. Her mother took on the more practical subjects: how to hunt, forage, stay out of trouble; where the Duskwight could move freely and where they should avoid.

There were always chores and odd jobs for children, especially needed when they left the relative safety net of The Cavern in the South. By her fifteenth nameday, this turned into steady work. She excelled in mostly physical jobs for merchants, farms, and outposts.

Nerys off-and-on entertained the idea of becoming a soldier, but never felt called enough to take steps. Once she reached her 20s, she had two main goals: make enough gil to live and to have fun when she wasn’t working. Nerys broke up her share of bar fights and dealt with fending bandits off merchant caravans, so again the idea of being a soldier or Adventurer came up.

The catalyst is a rough break-up that also ends a lot of her friendships. It is not that becoming an adventurer is a solution to any of the problems she faced. But in the wake of this big change, she took a long look at everything and decided she wanted something new. That leads her to Gridania and the Lancer’s Guild.

Disciple of War and Magic

Lancer/Dragoon

Meta Note

FFXIV is my first MMORPG. Prior, I have always been primarily a “solo play on my own at my own pace” kinda gal. But my friend said it was really fun and I love the FF franchise, so there I went. I wasn’t sure what class to do, was thinking Fighter until I learned it was a tank class.

My only other major online game experience was Overwatch where I was a Lucio main. That was a rarity for me: I tend to have a tougher time with caster/support classes and prefer playing as a rogue or sniper in most games. As rogue wasn’t an option, I asked my friend what she thought and she suggested Dragoon.

There were three options in Gridania: Conjurer, Archer, Lancer. Although Nerys later tried her hand at the other two, Lancer appealed her as someone who wasn’t afraid to get into the thick of things.

She ended up taking well to it and her fellow guild members. The guild was very much “here are a few techniques, go out there and figure it out” which matched up with her way of doing things.

Nerys is still processing everything that happened with Foulques of the Mist; angry with his choices while also understanding what he went through as a fellow Duskwight. It is a bit of a relief when Alberic becomes her new mentor and she can get away from everything. Not to mention: Coerthas is a place she has always wanted to go to. Her father’s lessons included their sweeping history as well as their poetry and stories.

Of course, things go sideways almost immediately. The Eye chooses her as the second Azure Dragoon and her first encounter with Estinien is anything but friendly. Things settle on that front for awhile and her primary concerns become the Primals and Garlemald. And having a small foothold in Coerthas is a boon when she, Cid, and Alphinaud travel there in search of the airship.

When Estinien suggest they partner together, she is hesitant given their previous encounters but feels drawn to help him. She agrees. That all comes crashing down after Nidhogg reveals to Estinien how Alberic’s actions lead to the loss of his family. Nerys has to step in to fend him off. The next time she sees him is in the Intercessory with Aymeric. Though he assures her he is not there to fight, she is on her guard.

She never expects that Ishgard will become the place she calls home. Nor that she and Estinien will become friends and then something more, eventually becoming lovers after he rescues her from Elidibus-Zenos. But it does and they do, and even when they both give up the title of Azure Dragoon, she feels called to protect and serve her adopted homeland. For the sake of the Fortemps and Aymeric and Lucia and Hilda and Ysayle, but also for people like Alberic, Estinien, and Heustienne who made her the warrior she is today.

Note About Armor: Nerys has her preferred aesthetics and the traditional Dragoon armor doesn’t quite fit. She prefers her own style and her concession is armor that pays tribute to the heritage of the position without being an exact copy (pictured, not her only armor set in canon or meta-wise).

That said, she is aware of when statements need to be made. Nerys isn’t a political creature in the way Aymeric and Alphinaud are but she understands that politics are a part of everything.

For certain missions and meetings she garbs herself in the traditional manner: needing to remind the Alliance of her strong ties to Ishgard, making the Heaven’s Ward realise how badly they erred in imprisoning Aymeric when both Azure Dragoons show up.

Meta Note:

Once I got to Level 15, I joined...all the Guilds in Gridania. And for a while worked on leveling Archer, Conjurer, and Rogue while also making progress with Lancer/Dragoon and MSQ. Eventually I switched gears because I wasn’t progressing fast enough in the story and focused almost exclusively on Dragoon.

For story purposes, Rogue doesn’t quite fit into Nerys’ story though I think Thancred has definitely introduced her to that crew.

Archer

Archer never quite suited Nerys, as someone who prefers to get close to the action. She does have a great deal of respect for her fellow guild members and Lewin; and she remembers what she learned when ranged combat is needed.

Conjurer

Nerys’ aether control as a Dragoon is excellent. But for whatever reason, she could not quite translate those skills to conjury.

She kept on for some time because in her mind, a good warrior would have healing skills at her disposal. Eventually, a conversation with E-Sumi-Yan brought her to accept that she might better serve others in a different way.

What she did gain was an affinity for the element of air, likely tied to her role as a Lancer/Dragoon. This becomes vital when she saves Haurchefant at The Vault, although it does not go as well as she would have liked.

(She also had a foray with the Arcanist’s Guild that was about as long as Tataru’s.)

Meta Note:

Disciple of Hand/Land: I have levels unlocked in all the DoH/DoL, the following four make the most canon sense and are the ones I have progressed in the most.

That said, canonically she dabbles in everything because she is naturally curious and wants to be self-sufficient in all things. Most of the guilds know her. The following four know her the best and it’s where most of her focus has gone.

Disciple of the Land

Botanist

Nerys was drawn to the Botanists’ Guild because of her upbringing. She knew much of the Shroud and its treasures already. What she found–as she became an adventurer–was that these skills help immensely on the road.

It’s also a centering profession. Nerys needs activity to bring her out of her own mind, especially as responsibilities and dangers pile on. She can go lose herself in nature, either for her own needs or on commission (and often both).

Having grown up foraging ingredients to cook with, her Botanist career also ties into Culinarian role.

Disciple of the Hand

Culnarian

Nerys grew up cooking alongside her mother, so she had a base of knowledge going into the guild. Still, through Lyngsath and the rest she discovers a whole world of new ingredients, recipes, and techniques.

As a hunter and a Botanist, there is no end to the new ingredients she find to experiment with.

Leatherworker

Nerys fell into leatherworking when she was scoping out all the guilds in Gridania (around the time she took up with the Archers and Conjurers).

It stuck for a few reasons: the resources were fairly easy to come by from her hunts; it is another centering activity; and she is a bit of a clotheshorse. If she has to wear specific gear as a Dragoon, she can add her own pretty details to the leather pieces.

Weaver

This is a culmination of the other jobs: uses resources from other things she does (botany, hunting, and leatherworking), a craft that pulls all her focus into one thing, and satisfies her clotheshorse desires. She knows she can put pretty details into her everyday armor/gear and make more formal clothes that make her feel good.

(Whenever she is dealing with A Thing, she will get her hair done. Of course she needs clothes that work with the new look, even if it’s a temporary updo.)

When it comes to leatherworking and weaving, there a plus to taking guild commissions: it has to be perfect and meticulous and good quality but it is not on the level of say...if you fail this task, a primal will temper all these innocents. Nerys is drawn to help people but it's nice to do that for something that is not saving the world. (Of course when she makes any type of armor or working clothes, she is sure to make them well so they protect the wearer.)

She is not advanced enough to make her own gowns for formal events held by the city-states or the Ishgardian High Houses. One day she would like to be able to do so. Until then, Eorzea has plenty of dressmakers ready to help.

Outfit Note: I ended up choosing a mix of the Scion and Best Man’s clothing, thinking of how you can never go wrong with a suit. It’s crisp, always in style, and she looks great in it!

#nerys eluned #duskwight elezen #duskwight warrior of light #elezen #dragoon warrior of light #ffxiv #dragoon #botanist #weaver #leatherworker #culinarian #long post #ally writes

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quantumfeat72 · 4 years

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some Infinity Train meta

So my brother and I spent like an hour analyzing infinity train season 2 and I wanna infodump some of it because I think we had some really good points. This is mostly about “M.T” but also involves some other stuff. Going under a cut because spoilers.

Part One: Lake’s Reflection

For the majority of the series, there are only two circumstances where Lake can see her own reflection: The first is when she sees a glimpse of the mirror world,

and is in immediate danger from the flecks. The second is when she’s looking at her own hand.

Usually her right hand, where her number would be.

Lake spends most of this time distancing herself from Tulip - insisting that she’s not just a reflection, or a denizen, or a sliver, but her own person.

But when people ask for her name, she has nothing to tell them.

This is because metaphorical and literal self-reflection are both dangerous for Lake. She knows what she isn’t, but when she tries to figure out what she is she’s confronted with a lot of horrible questions. We see this when she’s trapped in the wasteland with Agent Mace.

"What do you think would happen if you were allowed through the exit? You just go out into the world, with your metal skin, and your magic deer, and what? High school? Prom?"

Lake has never asked herself these questions, because she doesn’t have an answer for them - on some level, she doesn’t think there IS an answer for them. But it gets even worse than that.

“Do you ever wonder why that car was there? The Mirror Car, the Chrome Car, whatever you wanna call it. Your prime couldn’t have gotten out of the car unless you switched. No one’s prime could’ve. So, did the train make the car so you could get out? Maybe the car was FOR you. To use you to help Tulip learn.”

“Just another creation of the train.”

It’s possible - likely, even - that the train didn’t just create the car. It created the mirror world. It created Lake, and gave her memories from outside the train. Tulip’s refection wasn’t alive until the instant she stepped foot in that car.

And what does that mean for Lake? Well, that makes her a denizen. A “null.” And this is what keeps her trapped in the train, because denizens can’t leave. The train is their home. They’re supposed to be happy there.

And that’s the narrative that she has to fight. To escape the train, she has to believe that she’s her own person, with a face and a name, who deserves to be happy like anyone else. And when she gets off the train, and Nate asks what her name is, she looks around...

and sees her reflection. She names herself after the first thing she saw her reflection in that wasn’t going to hurt her.

Not only that, but it shows her acceptance in being a reflection - she is a reflection, but she’s more than that. Lakes are reflective, but when we think about them, that’s not the first thing we think of. A mirror’s purpose is to reflect, but a lake can just exist; it doesn’t need a purpose.

Lake is my child and I lover her. Moving on.

Part 2: The Moral Framework of the Universe

This one is mostly my brother. See, in a lot of media there’s this kind of mix between two different modes of thought regarding morality: either the universe is inherently neutral and things just happen because they happen, or the universe is inherently good and everything happens for a reason. The second one often has tropes like “the chosen one,” and prophesies that look wrong but wind up being right in the end, and trials and tribulations that teach the protagonist lessons they wind up needing to defeat the big bad guy.

Infinity train has a lot of tropes from the second category without really making statements about the world outside of the train, because the world inside the train was created with a purpose, and that purpose is character development.

This allows it to use these tropes and have bad things happen for good reasons, but there’s a twist:

“She has to get off, but she can’t get off without a number...”

The god of this world has a face, and he can be wrong.

Season one of infinity train was about finding the god of the world, overthrowing the moral framework of the universe, and reinstating the old one.

Season two is about existing within it. It’s about surviving, and tricking the universe into doing what you need it to. It’s about escaping the moral framework of the universe and making your own.

“One-one, look! I have a number!”

One-one won’t give Lake a number - I don’t think he can, I think it goes against something in his core programming - but she can give herself one!

That’s what season two is about: making your own rules when the rules of the universe, of the government, of the train, are unfair to you.

Infinity train is really good you guys.

#infinity train #infinity train spoilers #mt infinity train #lake infinity train #infinity train meta #mine #im serious about spoilers yall the end is spoiled here #please watch it before you read #it's really good and it's only 10 episodes per season #that are like 12 minutes each #and it will make you cry #100 notes

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amwritingmeta · 5 years

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15x05: How to Fight God

Proverbs 17:3 --> The crucible for silver, the furnace for gold, but the Lord tests the heart.

This proverb really gets to me when looking at it in the light of 15x05, but also when looking at how it relates itself to the series as a whole, because our boys are going through nothing short of a trial by fire, their whole world and sense of self is beginning to take flame and that sounds poetic af, but it’s also so fucking poignant that I can’t even.

Because isn’t this what their whole journey has been? And what it’s been about, too, meaning that the trial by fire serves an actual purpose, the get rid of the impurities (if you will) while the actual trial isn’t by fire, but lies truly in the aftermath, in the lessons and the learning curve: the heart stuff.

That aside, of course, applied to 15x05 it’s quite literally God testing their hearts - and what they’re really made of - by throwing them a proper curve ball in Lilith, not to mention this revealing the fact that he’s still a presence.

We open on Sam, who’s checking his phone to see if Cas has finally replied to all the concerned texts Sam has sent him (my heart leaped I loved it so much!) (of course Sam wouldn’t not reach out) (and amazing that Cas literally decided then and there to walk out the door and he just removed himself entirely) (also - poor Sam!) (he lost a friend!!) and Cas hasn’t gotten back to him.

Buuuut!

Cut to the end of the episode and Sam is just hanging up from having an actual conversation with Cas. Sorry, this was me remembering this entirely wrong and not double-checking - it went straight to voicemail and is clearly stated as doing so, pls, ignore my ignorance!

There’s still a nice, subtle bookend here, and it still underscores the change we get from the opening scene to the closing: the brothers both believing they’re back to business as usual (with the difference of how now they’re actually holding the reins) vs. realising God isn’t gone and that the status quo is not something they can fall back on here.

Speaking of the status quo, the way things have always been, the saving people, hunting things, family business side to the brothers’ lives that is, as far as they’re concerned, the cornerstone of their identities... yeah, let’s speak of that for a bit, because if we look at the episode I believe the status quo, or perhaps the repeat patterns, is/are actually the answer to the question Dean finishes the episode with:

How do we fight God?

So then.

How To Fight God

This is basically speculation based in my meta reading of the episode so pinches of salt, loves, but it’s intriguing to me to think about what the rules of this world actually are, because this is GOD the CREATOR, right? Yeah.

How can you, the puppet, defeat your puppet master when your puppet master determines which of your strings are pulled at any given moment?

Well, firstly, I’m stuck on the exchange between Dean and Cas from 15x02:

Cas: You don’t think I’m angry? After what Chuck did? After what he took from me? He killed Jack. But that doesn’t mean it was all a lie. [...] Even if we didn’t know that all of the challenges that we face were born of Chuck’s machinations, how would we describe it all? We’d call it life, because that’s precisely what life is. It’s an obstacle course. And maybe Chuck designed the obstacles, but we ran our own race, we made our own moves, and mostly we did well with that. Dean: Did we? I’ll tell you what we do know - nothing about our lives is real. Everything that we’ve lost, everything that we are, is because of Chuck. So maybe you can stick your head back in the sand, maybe you can pretend that we actually had a choice... I can’t. Cas: Dean. You asked what about all this is real -- we are.

I mean technically Dean didn’t ask anything, he stated that nothing about their lives is real but alright I get that you want to break through, Cas, because this is Cas trying to make Dean understand that not everything has been pre-determined by Chuck.

If free will didn’t exist at all in the narrative, then there would be no room for any kind of stakes, emotional or otherwise.

If it didn’t come down to what choices each situation brought about and the lessons derived from the consequences of those choices, then the meaning of the character journeys would be completely nullified.

And these rules of the world we’re watching are most clearly demonstrated to us in the S14 season finale, when Dean makes that epic choice of not shooting Jack, effectively ripping up Chuck’s perfect ending and forcing him to go all mental deity on a power trip on all of their asses.

So Cas is clearly right in the above exchange, but Dean can’t hear it, and because Dean just refuses to listen, Cas sees no other choice but to leave in 15x03. Because all Cas can see is how Dean refuses to let go of old patterns of thinking, old hang ups and fears, and how Dean finds refuge in blaming an external source rather than gaining perspective, accepting his own level of responsibility (in any situation) and moving forward.

I’m very curious about the prayer and what level of exposition it will entail. Imagine it being an actual callback to the confession scene in S11, where the exposition of Dean’s internal struggles with his longing for more is so beautifully balanced. Anyway, digression.

What I’m getting at is that choices seem to play an enormous part here, and of course they should, because that’s one of the most prominent thematic threads the writers can pull on.

Our choices make us who we are.

It’s not what you are, but what you do.

No one can tell you who you are, you choose who to be.

And along these, all the times we’ve heard I didn’t have a choice. Often this has been true, when put in a situation that is about not only saving each other, but the world itself as well, but then those world-saving situations wouldn’t really have been brought about if Dean, that first time Sam died, hadn’t made the choice (echoing Mary) to sell his soul to save him, and, of course, none of the choices would’ve been necessary if Mary had let John die, but we know the world that would’ve brought about, so thank...... fate for bad choices.

Perhaps it’s time for good ones.

How do you fight God?

I think you fight him by breaking old patterns, and the only way you can break them is by recognising them for what they are and truly, definitively, moving out of them and into new ones.

Chuck represents the writer not keeping up with their own character’s progression, right? He’s not seeing what this world he’s created has actually become, without his influence. All he sees is what he wants it to be, rather than all that it is, and he believes in his own control to the extent of not adjusting the obstacles he’s throwing at the boys to their ever evolving view of themselves and what they want for themselves.

Which is why the plot point of Dean being seduced by Lilith wasn’t even hinted at until she stated, in dialogue, that apparently it wasn’t happening. Thanks to Dean’s progression away from who he was way back when, yeah? Not exactly the same, are you, Dean?

And which is why I believe the moment when Sam says-->

--> is quite possibly crucial, because Sam can see the pattern, he knows the grooves of it so well that he immediately feels something is off when they’re just handed the solution on a platter, and this hunch proves right, because they know how Chuck’s story works, innately, they’ve lived it for over a decade.

If they can catch up with this fact, if they can begin to use it to their advantage, that would be very cool. If they begin to go against their old mode of being, if they try to think outside of their own box (as it were), then not only is that a viable way of beating Chuck at his own game, it sets the stage for their final leg of character progression rather beautifully.

Because it forces them to grow wholly self-aware, to question their choices and weigh the pros and cons. Realisation City.

And how gorgeous then to have the setup be that to survive and have a healthy sense of control over their own lives, they must evolve away from their old ideas and ideals. *fingers crossed*

And then there’s Chuck as representative of the over-arching shadow, representative of all those things that the boys have battled throughout their journey, and if integration is the goal, then Chuck shouldn’t really be reaped by Billie, should he? I mean, him being reaped by a representative of strong, assertive femininity works on a symbolic level as well, but integration could mean that he simply has his power stripped.

I’d quite like that, to be honest. The way to fight God is to stop worshipping him, stop believing in what he represents, stop allowing his obstacles to be real obstacles and simply move out of the narrative he’s been telling and into a new one, where his chosen ending makes absolutely no sense. And if Jack returns there may be a player with enough power to actually tell God that his time as ruler of this particular universe is done, because they will fight him, now that they see him for what he truly is. Every step of the way.

Alright, lots of speculation here, but the thought of the brothers’ progression actually playing a role in how they can defeat Chuck makes me get all goosebump-y!

The werewolf brothers acted as a Chuck tool of foreshadowing for his chosen ending: one brother killing the other, but there’s a deeper psychological symbology in the werewolf brothers’ story, where one brother’s control and deceit made the other see no other choice but to kill him and then himself, because they were the same.

So looking at them as representative of the codependency, it’s actually the aspect of control and self-deceit that has to die, in both Sam and Dean, for the codependency to finally break. Sam leading the way (as per the water bottle scene at the start of the episode) and freeing them both in his process of breaking away from Dean.

And when Lilith says that she had to die in order to get what she wanted, it could be seen as a statement of that same symbolic subtext, and how the brothers’ progression is moving them away from who they have always been, into who they truly are and want to be: they have to kill off their past ideas and ideals, and embrace the truth of this if they’re going to be victorious in this fight.

We shall see, my loves! We shall see!

I’d be remiss if I didn’t say this, though, to a writer who has given us so much:

Thank you, Steve Yockey.

For everything.

#<3 #spn meta #spn 15x05 #character progression #dean winchester #sam winchester #codependency #breaking the codependency #symbology #chuck #how to fight god

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mittensmorgul · 5 years

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So I started watching 14.16 intending to write meta commentary on it and got an email asking if I could do the transcript for the episode, so instead of writing meta notes, I have spent the last three hours transcribing it (fyi it will be posted tomorrow, but I don’t have time to finish it and still finish my rewatch in time AND still actually, you know, sleep here eventually...)

But there are still a few things I think need noting here. Lies and the fact that some lies ARE NECESSARY. Or at least, sometimes better and more useful than the truth.

After the Kohonta is killed, will telling Tom the truth about what killed his girlfriend and almost killed him actually serve any purpose? Will he even believe the truth, since he only saw the monster for a split second before being knocked unconscious? Will it bring him comfort or only more fear of something that’s dead and gone and can’t hurt anyone anymore? Or will it be his own hunter origin story?

Because the Sheriff, upon learning about the monsters, his initial reaction was anger that they were kept secret from the general public. He felt awful that he’d never believed in the monster legend of his own people, and never known about other monsters. But Sam and Dean give him some very good reasons why... most people are not equipped or trained to deal with these things, and knowing about them would only cause panic and terror. And even if they did know about them-- as the Sheriff knew about the kohonta-- they might not really believe anyway. The Winchesters have been living with this their entire lives, and they’ve reached a point where they understand when someone NEEDS to know, and when it’s better to keep the truth to themselves.

We saw this play out on Jack’s side of the story, as well. Dean lied to Jack about why they didn’t want him on the hunt, but they told him the truth upon their return. They didn’t want him to use his powers, and in fear of disappointing them (as Sam suggests to Dean, kids will hide stuff they feel will disappoint their parents like they used to do as kids), Jack doesn’t tell them about his use of his powers and the consequences of that with Max, Stacy, and Eliot. Jack has inadvertently learned the wrong lesson here.

And as I watch 14.17 while I type this up, Anael and Cas discuss what he knew about her:

ANAEL: You ever wonder why a vaunted apprentice became a lowly button pusher? CASTIEL: Well, I heard that Joshua offered you more responsibility, and you just walked away. ANAEL: I believed in Heaven. You know, our mission. I believed, Castiel. But then I got to Earth, and I saw that it wasn't the paradise God promised. I mean, there was so much hate… so much suffering. So I asked Joshua-- I mean, these were God's creations-- his perfect people. Why wasn't he helping them? And do you know what he said? CASTIEL: No. ANAEL: "God doesn't meddle." He doesn't meddle? Well, I do. So I do. CASTIEL: And here I thought you just performed miracles for the money. ANAEL: Well, you haven't been paying attention, then. I do them for me. I don't need Heaven. And I don't need God. And… I'm happy, Castiel. CASTIEL: Really? Because that sounds lonely. ANAEL: We're all lonely, because we're all alone. From ant to lion to human to angel. Every last one of us. CASTIEL: You know, he does meddle. God reached down, and he brought me back to life. ANAEL: So he saves one angel… and watches millions of people die screaming, every day. What does that say about him?

Aah, Chuck’s meddling. Like conditionally acceptable lying, Chuck does meddle far more than Anael believes. He just doesn’t necessarily meddle how she thinks he should.

And then she tells Cas that he’s so desperately trying to contact Chuck for help because he’s afraid to tell Sam and Dean the truth about Jack’s current soulless state. Some truth is really hard to accept.

And everything Nick does in this episode is a lie and a manipulation, courtesy of Lucifer’s plans. Like, literally a direct parallel to s4 and Lucifer’s escape from the cage, condensed into a single episode, where Sam and Dean thought they were on one mission (save Donatello) when in fact they were being lured into a trap.

This is Chuck-meddling level manipulation, as we see in 14.20. And after 14.20, I’m not even sure all this Nick and Lucifer stuff was even the goal of the trap. Or at least it wasn’t the only goal of the trap. Every point at which Nick’s plans derailed, it was because of Jack. Jack discovered what he’d really done to Donatello, discovered where Nick was performing his ritual, healed Sam before he could die, killed Nick where Sam couldn’t, but then... he reacted poorly to both Mary’s suggestion that what he’d done to Nick was wrong, and her insistence that Sam and Dean needed to know about this.

It’s the leveled-up problem that Cas had been afraid to tell them about.

(and now it’s super late, and my brain has ceased functioning to finish this so draw your own conclusions I guess/) :P

#spn 14.17 #spn 14.16 #s14 hellatus rewatch #it's spirals all the way down #if you say 'mysterious ways' so help me i will kick your ass #lies and damn lies #spiders georg of the tnt loop

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panicsprey · 6 years

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This doesn’t have anything to do with you-!

... Iida... what’re you saying?

Look, child, since when does anything Izuku gets himself involved in have anything to do with him? So first of all, invalid argument. And another thing: yes this damn well does! You just said at the station you were friends; that’s literally crew status invite to dive in up to your elbows the second shit gets real. This has nothing to do with Midoriya my left toe.

And gosh, I’ve been on a kick of reasons I love Izuku Midoriya and here it damn is: he’s so scared, and you can see it- he’s not the reliable, infallible hero that he idealizes and wants to be. He’s a scared, fledgling student-hero who would be much more intelligent to duck and cover. But instead, his mind goes to All Might, his mind goes to recognizing his opponent in a time when someone else would be panicking and scrambling with a desperate escape plan. But Izuku’s clever, he’s devoted to saving as many as he can and that includes the unexpected presence of Native.

...... I have to wonder if he’s thought of the pin-drop plan before this, or if that was sporadic.

But tbh I love???? how malleable and adaptive he is, how flexible his cunning is. He’s watched so much about heroics and given so much assessment to strategy that he’s so much more cunning and able than those who have been working on their quirks and such for years, and that’s just a damn hobby for him. He enjoys it, and he’s damn good at it too. It comes down to the argument again of are you talented by nature or by work, and Izuku is goddamn talented by both. He enjoys it, he’s good at it, and he works extremely hard to maintain and expand on it. And it saves him, and will save those that he loves and wants to help, too.

“I’ll just have to protect these two and stall for time.”

Not escape, not go get help, not keep himself safe. While he recognizes instantly his own error ( Telltale games message: Midoriya Izuku will remember that ), he instantly decides on a strategy and dedicates to it. It’s amazing to me how opposite he is socially from how he is in combat. He’s decisive, and while he’s not confident he’s definitely assured that he’s doing what he has to- he dedicates to actions and to decisions, whereas in social settings and low-key events, he’s much more in his own head and can’t trust instinct. It’s just amazing to me that he slips into this sort of almost comfort when he’s got his adrenaline going...

“Meddling when you don’t need to is the essance of being a hero!”

HI WOW I LOVE IZUKU

Okay but seriously, Izuku lives by these words. He would give Donald Duck a conniption fit from meddling. That’s all he does.

And the fact that even as he’s darting in with the expressed purpose of distracting and buying time, his mind is whirring- focus on the sword, since he thinks that right now the quirk is cutting someone to paralyze them. He works well with what he’s given and strategizes around it, but he’s not so stiff or rigid that he can’t adapt those assumptions when presented new evidence or ideas. Get in close with a long ranged weapon and you have disadvantage on your attack- D&D rules, and it’s impressive that Izuku can make that kind of assessment without honest practical training ( he’s mostly been fighting hand-to-hand; I want these kids to get some kind of weapons training at some point, if only so they know how to defend against them, too ).

ALSO LET’S TAKE A SECOND AND THANK BAKUGOU THAT WAS A KACCHAN MOVE HE USED TO FUCKING DODGE THE SWORD AFTER DUCKING UNDER STAIN’S LEGS OKAY PRAISE BE TO THE FACT THAT BAKUGOU’S NATURALLY TALENTED AND IZUKU IS A GODDAMN SPONGE ( which Iida does, praise be ).

But seriously- how quick did Izuku recognize the new blade and dodge just wrow look at him and his insane reaction time.

And also let’s level I’m still not surprised Stain got him, though- the fact that it was such a tiny cut is what really impresses and amazes me. It was never a matter of if, but when. Stain is a killer and well versed with fighting a variety of heroes and quirks. Even if he’s an amazing talent and so very impressive, Stain is a class of his own. It’s incredible that he was only slightly nicked then.

.... I have to wonder if Izuku accepted Stain’s assessment. It’s funny to me: I never realized, but this is the first time that someone has edged Izuku toward prediction rather than assessment and reaction. Izuku is a very reactive person, and while he’s very good at anticipating, predicting is something he learns he should focus on more later, from Mirio, from Nighteye, and yet Stain mentions it here. That’s really Izuku’s next step, isn’t it... clearly the mark doesn’t land, and for good reason: he’s a little rightly distracted- doesn’t matter if this guy “think(s) [he] should leave [Izuku] around” because he’s better than these two ( Izuku vc: wtf no I’m not- ), his friend is gon’ get stabbed-

AND THEN TODOROKI SHOWS UP. -confetti-

“You need to give more details in times like this.”

Gestures emphatically to the butt-pin conversation I had with Lyn maybe not practical bud

But thank goodness- and this just shows that Todoroki’s pretty quick on his feet too- get a message like that and extrapolate well enough to be timely. But I digress because I also love literally all of these characters- Thank goodness Todoroki was in Hosu, though, lbr...

“Next time try to send more information than just your specific location. But then, you’re not one to send cryptic messages without a reason, are you?”

Thanks, Todoroki- you get it. But seriously, you’re still just getting a pin next time. I believe you’ll figure it out. :thumbsup:

....... as I now wonder who all got that pin did Mom get that pin did Aizawa get that pin who all knew where Izuku was at that moment and just looked at their phone like ‘wtf did Izuku sit on his phone or something why’s he in some weird ass alleyway in Hosu....’........ panicked Momdoriya noises??

God but I love Izuku how many times have I said that in the last three days this is getting problematic. I’m glad he figured out that quirk as quickly as he did- again, he’s been exposed to so many quirks and so much about the Hero Killer and everything that his mind just clicks and I’m just dfjkas;fd \ o /

You can tell it’s almost 2am because my vernacular is devolving into keysmashes and emoticons

I WON’T DEVOLVE INTO META ABOUT TODOROKI BUT HOLY SHIT You’re Ingenium now? Strange. The Ingenium I knew never had that look on his face. fdjklsaf look at how he’s already changed he’s helping others and I’m just

.... I weirdly like Stain giving them advice as he fights them. Imagine if he escaped and came back like a Team Rocket montage. Just pops in, fucks ‘em up a bit, gives ‘em a tongue lashing, then bolts into the night to kick their asses and teach them valuable life lessons another evening........... because why bother.... giving them this advice... when he’s gonna kill them..... Stain’s such a fun character....

MIDORIYA DODGE

WELL SHIT TODO GIVE HIM TWO SECONDS OF WARNING HE COULDA BEEN A POPSICLE

“I’ve got three guesses as to why [ his quirk wore off on me ]”. HOW QUICKLY HE COMES UP WITH THOSE DEDUCTIONS IS BAFFLING HE’S SO DAMN PRACTICAL I LOVE HIM. And appreciate that he’s willing to divulge that to others fjkldsa;fds

;-; We can protect them. I cry, these two are a kick-ass team I die-

AND TODOROKI BEING WORRIED ABOUT IIDA I’M FJKDSLAFDKSA;

GOD I have so many emotions about the whole ending with Todoroki, particularly about how Izuku helped him, but I’ve just devolved into little squealing sounds that made Muppet bark with concern so I should probably go to bed....

#;; Journal Entries { headcanon }#{ Cherry was right my chant was a fake I am a charlatan #I can't rewatch without screaming #but this is literally just me rambling and making weird upset noises }

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alldayieat · 7 years

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Regret #1 My biggest regret

Not getting a proper camera to take pictures of my recipes!!! Ughh!!!!!

I thought I could just do it with my iPhone.

And I did. It works. It can be done. BUT!

After I got my real camera a few months ago, I don’t know if you noticed but the pictures got a lot better.

In terms of quality and also with the depth of field.

You cannot blur the background with a phone camera.

Even though the iPhone Plus has that functionality it’s just not comparable to a real camera.

Blurring the background is important so you can draw the viewers eye to a certain point. (Front of ice cream scoop is in focus while, behind is slightly blurred)

Example

Also, if your lighting is not the best, a camera phone can’t hide it as well as a stand alone camera.

The sensor on a phone camera just isn’t big enough to gather the image in low light settings!

Lesson learned? Get a real camera!

Regret #2 Not taking enough pictures

One of the worst feelings is cooking up something delicious and making it look nice, taking the photo and discovering a few days later the photo didn’t do the dish justice.

After this happened a few times, I made sure to both review and also take more pictures than I think I’ll need and from different angles too!

By taking more pictures, I would have more to choose from when going through and deciding what to post.

When I first started, I took literally 2 pictures of a dish and that was it.

If it was blurry or dark, it could not be used!!

Some of these things can be fixed in Lightroom, but sometimes they can’t.

Lesson learned? Take lots of photos!!

Regret #3 Not submitting to Foodgawker right away

I started posting recipes here in early August 2016.

I didn’t submit any posts to Foodgawker until November 2016.

I was rejected many many many times, see screenshot from my profile. My reject list is limited to the last 6 months, so you won’t see any from before February 2017.

It took a good 6 months of practicing and resubmitting and learning from their feedback before I started to get accepted on the first submission.

You can see I haven’t had any rejects since May so I’ve made some progress!! 🙂

I originally submitted my recipes to Foodgawker to grow my following.

But the unexpected consequence of that was improving and learning about food photography.

They even have a submission guide that explains what they are looking for in your photos.

Some recipes remain off Foodgawker because I never went back to rephotograph and update the recipes. One of these days…. I will get around to it!

Lesson learned? Get feedback on pictures ASAP!

Regret #4 Use Lightroom to edit your Photos!!

I ended up starting to use Lightroom after I went to a local meetup on food photography.

They went over some photography basics and walked through how to edit photos in Lightroom.

At that moment, I had the realization how important it is to edit you photos.

From that point on, I began editing everything before posting here and especially on Instagram.

No more taking pictures and uploading directly to WordPress!!

I don’t know why but I must have been hard headed that I didn’t need to edit my pictures.

Lesson learned? Edit photos!!

Regret #5 Not using Artificial Lighting

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poor lighting, unedited

artificial lighting, no editing

poor lighting, unedited

Foodgawker did a good job letting me know my photos were underexposed.

My ceiling has recessed fluorescent lights that are not bright.

They are warm (lighting temperature) and work just fine for the purpose of lighting a dark room.

But for my indoor food photography, they impart a yellow color to pictures (due to the temperature).

They also are not bright enough (not daylight).

So in my situation, a lot of my pictures were underexposed and needed to be corrected in Lightroom.

I’m often cooking in the evening when the sun has set or is setting so bright natural light isn’t available.

This is my setup. I use two daylight (6500k) LED bulbs stuck into a poster board.

It’s cheap and it works.

Ever since making this little contraption, lighting wasn’t much of an issue.

As of now, the only real changes I make in Lightroom are minor. (mostly for the temperature, exposure, and contrast)

Composition and styling remains my ongoing challenge.

Lesson learned? Use artificial lighting!!

Conclusion: 5 lessons learned about food photography

Use a real camera You don’t need a top of the line full frame DSLR, in fact, I started with a compact mirrorless Panasonic GX85, which I bought so it would be easy to travel with and could record 4k video!

Take lot’s of pictures Just when you think you took enough, take 5 or 10 more. You can always delete, but you can never retake (unless you have leftovers. But even that’s not the same!!)

Get feedback on your pictures If you are looking to improve your food photography, I would recommend that you try to submit your photos to Foodgawker or other similar websites. They helped me to get my skills to some sort of a base level and can help you too.

Edit your photos If you’ve never used Lightroom just watch a few tutorials on YouTube to learn the basics. Even with basic changes, you may see a drastic improvement in the quality!

Use artificial lights Here are the DIY instructions that I used to make my lighting setup.

I feel as though I’m at a plateau now food photography wise and have been messing around with different techniques and presentations.

Food styling isn’t really something that makes me excited, hence, the somewhat minimalist presentation of my food.

I don’t anticipate styling my food anymore in the future, but I also didn’t anticipate getting a camera or making videos.

We shall see….

If you liked this post or have any questions, let me know by leaving a comment!

In case you missed them, here are the links to the other lessons learned posts!

Lessons Learned from One Year of Blogging Part 2: Photography and 5 Regrets

Lessons Learned from One Year of Blogging Part 1: Inspiration

Lessons Learned from One Year of Blogging Part 2: Photography and 5 Regrets Regret #1 My biggest regret Not getting a proper camera to take pictures of my recipes!!! …

#blog #lessons

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