#and wont be able to gi through with it

[lovedaisy02]

Why isn't there any Nadine/Carlita content?? I caught some later episodes of Shooter and they were flirting like Root and Shaw.

#nadine memphis #shooter tv show #nadine x carlita #what tag should i look under? #i hope the show isnt just playing with the idea #and wont be able to gi through with it

[sporesgalaxy]

(did you know giung anon wont let me bacjspace to correct my seplling mistakes?? anywho-)

everytime yiu post ur version of caleb im like goddamn that could be me. if i was prsented tge oppurtunity to go to the demon realm lead there by a hit wicth HOT WICTH sweet mother of sticks and abdonanded my siblings who i ove and le love me due to like……not being able gi be me AND trans my gender i would 100% go. rip me and cakeb we are on the same wavelength. anywys have a nice dsy sorry for ghe soellinv mistakes j feel like im talking through mud

JFKSHGS IM SORRY ABOUT THE WEIRD GLITCH BUT I FEEL LIKE IT ADDS A LOT TO THIS

anyways yeah, I also wouldve done exactly what caleb did if Id met a witch as a teenager. this is why ive latched onto Caleb like a weird bug

#toh

[xherry7816]

holy moly xherry7816 you've reached 50 likes !!!! ive been working on some gi designs for the ninja but ive been struggling to show off their individuality while still looking like their gi but i havent actually looked up reference of gi so in pretty sure that should be the first step.

ok so the au (still unnamed) taking place in a slightly canon divergent season 5 MORRO is currently after the realm crystal in his attempts to bring the PREEMINENT (?) to NINJAGO and like destroy it or whatever, solid stuff. except whats different here is that MORRO does not go and posses LLOYD as his first step because he'd struggle more as a human than if he were a ghost so he and his ghoul gang decide to get the hard stuff out the way, the ninja chasing them to put a stop to him obviously. also in this au NYA is not told by WU that she is the water ninja, instead she receives her awakening when defending one of the team from a ghost and then hes like omg :0 !#!%#!$#??

the au starts off with the mission to retrieve the realm crystal on time (before MORRO) because even if he beats them to everythinf else MORRO cant do anything without the crystal. unfortunately for them !!! MORRO is already a few steps ahead and when they reach the resting place of the FSM they find the ghost, crystal in hand. boom boom battle !! and theyre all fighting anf there are ghosts everywhere (NYA is not here bc remember KAI isnt supposed to know hes the water ninja yet) and MORRO is very clearly goig after LLOYD. wait, ok wait i need to type up my thinking process rn or else it wont make sense when i read everything back bc isnt only a spinjulistu master able to find the tomb,,,,, ermmm OK LLOYD possesion- no i cant do that to him. its an au whatever, so yeah MORRO'S in there crystal in hand going after greenie and KAI kicks in yk the brother stuff so theyr fighting anf stuff and like idk MORRO knocks KAI off his feet anf starts heading towards LLOYD again so as a last ditch effort KAI fires towards MORRO and it hits the crystal aaaa ! even thought i cant possibly imagine the crystal being so weak i can just say the power of love made him stronger bc those tight family bonds (im a sucker 4 found famiky but who isnt these days). and then its kinda like the scene in SONIC PRIME where the prism goes boom !! and theres a shockwave and it looks cool and then u see SONIC traversing through the SHATTERVERSE 4 the first time and then he ends up in NEW YOKE, except its KAI landing in the PRIME EMPIRE CITY with all his friends looking different and jazz. the whole mission is to retrive the realm crystal shards and put them back 2gether so he can get home and finish the fight with MORRO. for the og universe i kinda just imagine time stops so 4 the ninja itd look like KAI disappears for a few moments and then comes right back. as i did mention when i was vaugely describing universe 1 (PRIME EMPIRE divergent i hope im usong that word right btw) KAI doesnt stay long in that universe so just like in SONIC PRIME he will return to some universes, whether on purpose or not, to retrieve the shards

i was wondering if i should write a fanfic bc thats what most people seem 2 do but im not really good with keeping up the motivation to write, i used 2 have a miraculous ninjago crossover on ao3 (literally called miraculous bc im unoriginal) but after like 5 updates i did updates like one every 3 months and then deleted it lol so im probably jist going to let this au die when i get tired of it !!!! tbh i need to rewatch ninjago bc im forgetting all my facts (and a SONIC PRIME rewatch not that i really need to but its very good har har)

btw i hope its obvious that my username was supposed 2 be CHERRY, like my name, but i misspelt it and thought it looked cool.

should i make a tag 4 this au ??? its not really hard 2 find it since its pretty much all i post and i dont even know what 2 call it,,, ill just think abt it 4 now :D

#kai ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago #ninjago au #ninjago lloyd #nya ninjago #zane ninjago #cole ninjago #jay ninjago #kai smith #morro ninjago #wu ninjago

[mejomonster]

I finished final fantasy vii rebirth and. Some mixed opinions.

The main good points: as a Sequel to original FF7? Its good. The women are all written well (which was a concern considering Kairi and Lunafreya in past games), and everyone was in character just fleshed out more (with 2 slight exceptions). What the game did best was accomplish an open world game, world spanning adventure, stick fairly well to some main highlights from original ff7 (which is what people wanted for ages) and with new stuff thats fun if you like the world, very little wasting of player time (so much better than ff7 remake). It did open world well, pacing well, side quests and mini games well, characters well, combat well, and overall gave the feel of what square enix was maybe Hoping and Wishing to successfully accomplish in a mainline game for years but either hasnt been able to achieve on a technical level or fumbled in the past. (So no time wasting dungeons like ff7 remake, fleshed out open world with stuff you enjoy doing so more than ff15, open world so more than ff13, and combat that feels like things theyve learned and improved on well). How it feels to play? Great, fast paced, no dead time, all enjoyable game you came to play. (With the exception maybe of Cait Siths box mandatory mini game and the aerith in ancient temple magic platforms thing but they both werent too difficult to push through if you dont enjoy them).

The bad? Mostly... if you treat Rebirth as a SEQUEL to original ff7, these arent major issues. They just annoy me as a player of the original ff7 game. Because i know plenty of people will ONLY play ff7 Remake and Rebirth etc, and never know the original characterizations. So 2 characters were slightly unlike their original ff7 selves, and instead more like their Advent Children (and general non ff7 appearances) selves: aerith and sephiroth. Sephiroth's character being NOT like ff7 originals is more irritating personally. Because yeah... i get it. As a sequel to original ff7, this Remake/Rebirth Sephiroth might be from the future (so he is Advent Children esque version of himself), hes had time post losing his way to really get all mysterious and hyperfocus on cloud and be a looming vague pest. But the thing is... in the original ff7 the reason we learn hes used to be a SOLDIER war hero, is so the cast and you are confused why he kills Shinra people. Then you and the casy figure: well cloud remembers sephiroth finding out hes a monster cause of shinra, justifiable for sephiroth to hate shinra. Unflrtunately Sephiroth also decided to hate ALL HUMANS. Then you later find out maybe Jenovas controlling Sephiroth/one with him etc. But the key here is you find out at some point in original ff7 that sephiroths goal is mainly Destroy World because Hes not Human. Rebirth... does not clarify this very important and very BASIC point ever. Maybe it assumes its so basic that as a ff7 fan you should know.. but plenty of new players wont. Rebirth clarifies yes sephiroth may be Jenovas kid... but the whole MOM, im an ancient like Jenova! Oh Jenova isnt an ancient oh well fuck humans anyway! Either way fuck humans ill kill them all! None of those Very basic sephiroth motives are clarified much. I felt Rebirth did good explaining the Gi and the black materia. But to make Sephiroths motives so vague, why he wants to end the world SO VAGUE, why hes in clouds head (the black robes are everywhere but the game HINTS theure sephiroth clones but never actually spells it out eevn though its a BASIC KEY DETAIL). Now... because Rebirth is a sequel, it makes sense... if hes Advent Children Sephiroth he already knows he isnt an ancient, knows hes Jenovas kid, knows he wants to fuck with Cloud specifically now and the world generally but not necessarily so singlemindedly desperate to just kill all humans. So yes, Sephiroth is in character for his future self... but i feel like even with him less SINGLE MINDED and freshly with Jenova, clarifying some basics of his Original old timeline motives... would be helpful to new fans. So it annoyed me. I think the biggest Not Good writing decision in Rebirth was to never fucking clarify Sephiroths original basic goal: im not human like mom, hate humans, kill world. I suspect the writers either thought players KNEW so hinted instead of being on the nose (but to new players theyll just be CONFUSED), or they plan to explain those basic things in game 3. Which seems stupid to me and shouldve been explained earlier.

And Aerith. As a sequel? She remembered the other timeline which explained some moments she was calmer than original ff7. She forgot, then toward the end of Rebirth she seems to have remembered the other timeline again and that she needs to die and X happens etc. So her being calmer based on the plot they wrote for Rebirth? Makes sense. However... i deeply miss her Original FF7 personality where as an Ancient she freaks out a bit LIKE sephiroth, paralleling him, that shes not human, a freak, that it all rests on her as only one ancient left. Their overwhelm parallels each other. Aerith is more scared in original ff7 of being the only ancient, of what it means, of finding out more. That fear is slightly there in Rebirth but WAY LESS. its only a little in cosmo canyon and almost gone in the Ancient Temple. In ff7 expanded universe theyve changed her character over time to a calmer wiser goddess type like in Advent Children, and so yes in Rebirth when she remembers the alrernate timeline it makes sense she'd be calmer like her future self. However... i miss original ff7 aerith. I miss her initial shock, loneliness, fear of the weight on her shoulders, not being sure what to do. Her and Sephiroth, because of Rebirth writing them to know more, act more like their future selves and so. While it is in character and logical to the Rebirth plot. Its also sad to me that anyone who only plays Remake and Rebirth simply wont see what they were like WHEN these revelations were brand new shocks to them, forcing them to react and grow and fear. I dont think Aerith is written bad, i just think because this game is in reality is a Sequel im just personally mourning that it didnt have that as much of the original Aerith's personality who was afraid and discovering. Mostly her Rebirth personality is similar to original ff7s. But in some high tension moments shes way calmer and wiser than in the original. I miss getting to see some of that before to after character growth.

Oh and. The aerith dies scene. Does it make sense in context of Rebirth written as a sequel? Sure. Is it impactful? Not as much as the original. In Rebirth, theres a scene where Cloud is losing control and listening to Sephiroth and attacks Tifa, causing Tifa to fall into mako. That scene is high stakes and emotional and lands WELL. Later in Rebirth, when Aerith actually dies, Cloud has not lost control and isnt the one who killed her. Its fine, as a sequel to ff7 i get the choice to make him able to stop himself from hurting her. But it does make the scene less impactful: now cloud will NOT be blaming himself for her death, will not be struggling with the guilt and fear, and will not be as terrified of losing control again. Since he wasnt the one who attacked her. And since he saw her ghost/something post death, hes not even sad or grieving her. He thinks shes fine. These 2 things will result in a WILDLY DIFFERENT cloud moving forward than the original ff7 one who very much was distraught and horrified he did that. So like... as a sequel its fine these changes were made. But death wise... i wouldve prefered like, cloud drops her from up high qhile struggling with whispers, or doesnt get to her in time and sephiroth stabs her when shes too far away. The way Rebirth did it, cloud was near her, she gets stabbed anyway. It seemed to me almost like the writing was trying to vaguely or softly kill her, like somehow making it vague would make it hurt less. Yeah it did hurt less... but id rather if a character i love dies that its a Worthy Scene for them to die in. A strong meaningful scene that makes me cry, that felt like the loss it is. The Rebirth scene... couldve done its plot as intended and just make Cloud farther away or something and it wouldve been better to me. Maybe the writing point was Cloud thinks its fine, and its still not, and he cant even feel distaught because he cant tell if she died or if things are fine? Thats the only angle i can see where maybe the death scene did what the writers wanted? Anyway. Aeriths moms death made me sob, Aeriths death did not. It is what it is. I feel like Tifa, crying in my heart off screen, the game acting like Cloud like its fine and it looks fine to him but im confused like Tifa aa to why hes (the game) treating it that way. Lol.

Overall? Um 4/5. 8/10? Really solid square enix game, Amazing as far as final fantasy 7 SEQUELS go. It has one main weak spot in treating Sephiroth fully mysterious when a few clarifying details could help the game stand on its own Better (and make Sephiroth a stronger enemy character instead of a vaguer one). The other weak spots are more my personal preference and mourning the parts of ff7 original i miss and had wished were in this, but as this is a Sequel in a parallel timeline i dont feel the parts effect Rebirth on its own merit. It IS the best Square Enix game ive played in ages, at least since Final Fantasy X or XII. I thought it was better than FF13, FF15, definitely better than ff7 remake (i hate time wasting dungeons and bad pacing its a dealbreaker), and than kh3 (although kh3 was quite good for a kh sequel). I get to play FF16 next, which will hopefully be as good as Rebirth or better! Since its also on the PS5 and clearly from Rebirth, the square enix main team can do excellent combat, open world, level design, mini games, side quests, and good pacing now. So i'll just have to see if ff16's story is better. And i am guessing it hopefully will be, since Rebirth as an ff7 sequel has some weirdness to its plot quite typical of ff7 extended universe stories like Crisis Core and Dirge of Cerberus. Whereas ff16 is a brand new plot, so they have nothing preventing them from a tight excellent written story except themselves. I am curious how BIG ff16s world will be though. Because ff7 Rebirths world was MASSIVE and very full of stuff, tons of mini games, cool stuff to find or do or little character side quests. If ff16 also takes me 60 hours to beat the main story its gonna be thw longest final fantasy main title ive ever played.

Rebirth is very replayable if you enjoyed it. I will probably replay ff7 original soon.

#final fantasy vii rebirth #ff7r #lb #rant #oh and shipping discourse lol: if you ship tifa x aerith? GREAT TIME #tifa mourns aerith more than cloud does. tifa aerith ARE IN LOVE. great time for me as an aerti fan and ot4 fan #i do think in theory the writers had aerith x cloud scenes more in Rebirth since aerith dies at the end. and predict game 3 will have #more tifa x cloud scenes. so itll be even by the end. i think everything was in character tho tbh #(in my opinion anyway) #like. aerith x tifa x cloud x zack i ship and they clearly all CARE for each other. zack loves aerith but also saved cloud #when aerith likes cloud. zack is big enough to be happy for aerith and want her to have what SHE wants. #cloud loved zack and was so fucked emotionally when zack died he convinced himself he WAS zack. tifas his childhood crush. aerith likes him #and he gradually does like her back too. (clouds very not interested in crushes tho tbh. hed happilt be in ot3 with #tifa and aerith or ot4 with zack or ot3 with barret too if they just told him to be) #and tifa loves cloud but wisely isnt sure how he feels OR whats going on mentally with him. and is focusing on building trust #that cloud will communicate with her BEFORE getting romantic (shes wise we should all copy her). and she loves aerith. which is goof #cause cloud isnt giving aerith some care she Needs. but Tifa always does give aerith that support. #tifa knows aerith likes cloud. so tifa simply is likinv her 2 crushes (happy to be in an ot3 if aerith and cloud would start it) #but tifas shy and slow going ans values friends MORE so shes not making any major moves until she knows the other 2 aerith and cloud #are emotionally stable (and theyre lol not) #and now shes grieving aerith so :/. my point is: all the romance is written very in character #very similar to original ff7. and if ur a tifa AND aerith as characters fan like me? #its really NICE to have 2 main woman leads in a game (with romance even) who are full characters ON THEIR OWN #and really well written and with relationships outside of cloud. (again... after lunafreya and kairi #i was worried tifa or aerith as love interests might get written BAD or flat or destroyed writing wise #by some shitty square enix writer *cough* who tends to butcher woman characters if theyre love interests) #so im super glad i could just enjoy tifa and aerith #also as a Non romance lover. i enjoyed that Rebirth focused HEAVY on friends but had very little actual romance #flirting yeah sure. but aerith and tifa never even kissed cloud in my playthrough (yay for me) #their crushes are just side details they mention to be direct and communicate (wise of them) but the romance isnt the main point

[plague-parade]

hiii coming back here from my break :> im still having severe GI issues- most likely gastroparesis at this point. im having a gastric emptying study in three days, so hopefully that’ll give me answers. more detailed update under the cut!

tw for weight loss/talk

so ill start with the good things: i got interviewed by two grad schools!! i should hear back by december :> terrified that i wont be physically able to go to school but thats another story. i have an absolutely amazing partner now, theyre also chronically ill/disabled and its just so nice to have someone so close understand everything. i love them so much.

bad things: i can barely keep down solids anymore, ive lost over 20% of my body weight now since september. probably more now at this point :/ i was passed off by two pcps for being ‘too medically complex’ so. trying to get that sorted out. my fatigue is getting so bad that im basically bed/home bound again. it feels like im not getting taken seriously and its so frustrating. this got blamed on weed- they thought it was cannabinoid hyperemesis syndrome. i havent smoked in four months and nothing changed. im just so tired.

im so grateful for my partner for helping me get through this <33

#update #:’-)

[fanfiction-funtime]

IM SORRY IVE BEEN SLACKING ON HYPING YOU UP

Anyway I’m reading through the Things ™ and wow

Can I request something? There’s an idea I’ve been pondering for a bit. You know already who I’ll ask for, I’m guessing.

What if the reader fell for Xiao in Genshin, in a state where they constantly daydream about him. Rather than working on scenarios and scenes, it happens in real time.

Meanwhile, in another universe, Xiao in a modern setting has fallen for a Genshin character- the reader. He daydreams about them in the same manner.

To the reader, their Xiao is a guardian yaksha, Golden adeptus, and doombane itself.

To Xiao, his (y/n) is something just as exalted. I tend to use a seelie, since they’re an immortal race of ancient and now weak gods.

What they both don’t know is that they’re actually meeting in those daydreams. It’s not just imagination and the longing for company, but an actual relationship with another person.

Bonus points if it’s some sort of soulmate au and they physically can’t find each other and eventually realize it.

I’ve never told anyone about this before, and I’m excited to see what you do with it! I might work with it one day, just not yet.

(Hoo boy, this will be tough, but I'm sure I can do it! Xiao might be a bit ooc as I'm getting his personality from wiki and fanon, as well as modern au [hopefully] gives him less trauma and a slightly different personality.)

(Also, I can't do sad endings. So a bit of deus ex OC at the 3rd part)

---------------------------

Your game

---------------------------

Your pov: the dream eater of your dreams

---------------------------

You are (y/n)(l/n), and you are in the saddest love story this side of the lake.

Ever since you saw him in that first quest you were in love!

You were just a teen though, so it wasn't real right? After all, your red string wasn't connected to the screen.

Well, your string isn't connected to anything...

Y-your just a late bloomer though right?

(Ten years later)

Your now in your twenties and you still love Xiao!

He permeates your thoughts like how lovers do, you feel an inexplicable hurt in your chest similar to what many describe feeling when they see their soulmate prior to their string appearing, not to mention whenever you aren't busy you feel like you're...slipping...in...in and...

[Daydream]

It was happening again.

It was like a daydream but more...real.

Like a lucid dream.

You saw your string, just like so many other times, and you followed it.

You ran and ran, turquoise clouds parting and making paths for you to find him.

Him..

You ran and ran, glad that atleast in some way your delusions can give you some semblance of true love.

You saw the..wait..that's not the inn.

Well it is the inn, but more modern. And there was a school next to it, and a small village not far away.

Another of thing was that you were in some kind of yellow armor, it reminded you of those baby geovisnaps from genshin impact(that are absolutely BULL-)

You went into the elevator, which seemed more ancient than usual.

And when you reached the balcony, you saw him. But he was different.

Instead of the Yaksha you usually saw, you were greeted by an equally shocked man in a martial arts gi. But it was him.

But different.

You reached out, and he did the same.

And you touched

---------------------------

Xiao's pov: the midsummer knight of his dreams

---------------------------

(Clarifying: in this version Liyue is based on European mythology and aesthetic while Mondstadt is based on Chinese. So you are a fae hunting knight rather than a demon hunting yaksha)

Xiao had always been reserved, but what happened to him as a kid drew him further into his shell.

Abusive parents, accidentally giving his sister trauma induced amnesia, he felt the weight of his actions like atlas feels the world on his shoulders.

Luckily, two people took him and his sister QiQi in: QiQi's doctor Baizhu, and Xiao's therapist(and Baizhu's husband) Morax.

It was difficult to come out, even after Xiao stopped feeling so at fault. So he mostly stayed in his room and played video games.

That is until he met you.

Well met is the wrong word here.

He saw your character in his world's version of genshin impact: tribunal eruption

The way you used your weapon, the way your armor shined in the night as you rode to his wanderer. The smile you gave as he handed you (favourite food).

But most of all, the way you used fighting styles from so many martial arts and hand to hand combat techniques.

From irish kickboxing to karate, from assassination arts in ancient history of japan to systema.

It awoken two things in him: first was his want to learn martial arts and make his own.

The second was his love for you.

But don't worry, your physical attributes only drew him in. Your personality made him stay.

Years went on, he became a martial arts instructor for his own style, and moved into an apartment near a small village.

He started teaching at a school nearby, he even gets a discount on rent for giving free lessons to the owner's sons, Ivan and Viktor.

He's also convinced those two have a crush on him but it's pointless.

After all, he was a dream eater, a common group of people who have a strange ability to find their soulmate.

Specifically, the ability to have "lucid daydreams" where they meet their soulmate.

But he must be defective. After all his soulmate kept appearing as...well you. As a knight that would meet him on the balcony every night.

He assumed maybe it was your voice actor or designer, but neither of them have had the lucid daydreams.

He began thinking he'd never find his soulmate

Until one daydream...

He was on the balcony again, like a prince awaiting his knight to rescue him.

But it was different.

The apartment complex he lived in now looked much smaller, as did the tree it was built around, and the building looked far more ancient in design yet so much younger in age.

And the village and school nearby aren't there anymore.

Oddest change of all is that his gi he was wearing just a second ago is now similar to the outfit warn by the mondstadt demon slayer Corps

And when you arrived at the balcony, he noticed a red string, one that connected your heart to his. But you weren't wearing your armor, you were wearing casual, modern clothes.

He knew it was stupid, after all you can't touch your soulmate in the daydreams. But he felt compelled to....to reach out and..

You touched him.

---------------------------

nothing never comes between you, and nobody helps you get together

---------------------------

(3rd person pov)

He really did find it annoying, how often mortals would find themselves in the wrong dimension, especially when it's because the writer wants drama. And now he's written in to solve the problem.

Ah well, it's his job.

(2nd person pov)

You didn't know how to feel. You were touching Xiao...and you weren't waking up. Was this...real?

"You... you're real...different but....still the person I love...." Xiao seemed to be equally in a trance at the prospect

"yeah...so are you..."

The armor you wore melted away, and you cant see it but Xiao's fictional clothes melted from him as well. You were both equally real, in your own reality.

But you knew it couldn't last.

"When the daydream ends, I wont be able to see you anymore," Xiao said with a sea of tears in his eyes, "We've actually met now...and now...now the dreams will end."

You lean into him, "then let's make this dream the best one we've ever had."

Your about to kiss when-

"Terribly sorry about this!" A childlike voice called, "you know, interrupting your moment and all that. See for the sake of narrative, you both were put in separate universes. And it's my job to give you a happy ending."

When you both looked, you saw a child made of bone climbing into reality from some kind of hole.

"Now just wait a moment aaannnd-"

The turquoise clouds cleared, and the world rippled into a conjoined reality between genshin impact and tribunal eruption.

"Welcome to your dream world, enjoy eternal love!" The child said as he crawled back into the hole and it closed.

When he was gone, you both observed the world around you: a beautiful mix of aesthetics surrounded you, and both your armor and his adeptus clothing were on you both.

You gazed into eachother's eyes.

He placed one hand on your cheek while another held your hand, "I'm not good with speaking..speaking my emotions..but I....maybe my actions can do that for me..."

You felt your red string radiate with the warmth of love, likewise Xiao felt his daydreams dissipate like a haze leaving his mind.

You grab his hand and place your free hand on his cheek, mirroring his love, as you always have.

"Xiao...your very existence tells me all I need to hear.."

You both leaned in, and kissed.

Two lovers, in a dream made reality,

A paradise for all eternity.

---------------------------

I feel it kinda fell apart with the deus ex, but I think I scraped it back together in the end!

I hope it's good enough for what you envisioned buddy, I tried my best!

(Also I think you deserve something just as good as what happens to the reader insert in this fic, story)

(Tagging: @golden-wingseos (this is the writing blog for someone you told to tag you), and @storytravelled (just to keep the idea of tagging in mind))

#i will explain some choices in a reblog #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin #genshin impact #xiao #genshin xiao #xiao x reader

[justnerdthings]

New Beginnings Ch. 13

F!Reader x Liu Kang/Kung Lao

Let's play a game. You get the chance to vote on what happens next! This chapter ends right where you get to vote on what action you take next.

Reply to this post or send an ask with your vote.

You can reblog as always! :)

@ancientowlgirl @poor-unfortunate-soul-85 @shang-hung

Lao was right. You were a badass. No one had ever said that to you before. You had never even considered it. But, he was right. Finally realizing it, it gave you a much needed boost of confidence. A smile had been plastered to your face as you walked with Lao through the halls.

He’d decided to cut the Tai Chi lesson short. He didn’t want to push you too hard. He’d never hear the end of it if he did. Liu would never let that go. The first day back to training you, and he’d hurt you again? No. Liu would be absolutely livid if that happened. Instead, Lao had decided to walk you to the bathhouse. His eyes watched you as you walked with him, making notes of how you rolled your shoulders and neck every so often. You must have still been stiff. Hopefully the hot water would help relax you.

Thankfully, the awkwardness of his feelings for you had faded. You seemed comfortable with him--a welcomed change from last week. He smiled as you told him about New York, but couldn’t help the confusion that came over him when you began talking about your favorite fast food.

“So you’re telling me, that people actually pay to eat food that makes them sick?” Lao asked, laughing.

You nodded with a grin. “Taco Bell really does taste that good.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“Yeah. It doesn’t make everyone sick though. Never made me sick.”

“Maybe you have an iron stomach.”

“Or an iron ass,” you jested with a chuckle.

Lao laughed in his disgust. “If we’re ever around a Taco Bell, remind me not to eat there.”

“Okay, but I’m eating there. It’s my favorite.”

Lao shook his head, grinning. “Any other favorites that don’t make people sick?”

“Wendy’s.”

“Who?”

You laughed and shook your head. “It’s another fast food place. It’s literally called Wendy’s.”

“Oh. What are they like?”

“You’ve heard of Burger King and McDonalds, right?”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

“Kinda like them. But better.”

He laughed. “Better how?”

You struggled to find the words. “It’s just… better. It’s different. Different atmosphere. Their burgers are square.”

“Do square burgers taste better?”

“Theirs do.”

He laughed again and shook his head.

“That reminds me. Why don’t you guys eat meat?”

“Hm?” He turned his head to look at you. He shrugged. “Just never did, I guess. Liu did before he joined the temple. I was raised in it, so I never really had the opportunity growing up.”

“What about when you get out of here to do something for Raiden?”

He shrugged again. “Just don’t feel like it, I guess.”

“Would you though?”

Lao thought for a moment. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

“Why don’t monks eat meat?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “It has to do with Buddhism.”

“What? Like how Muslims don’t eat pork?”

He nodded and pointed at you. “Bingo.”

“Huh…” You could see that. Buddhism was about respecting all life. Animals were alive.

“What about you? Anything you won’t eat?” He asked.

“Tripe.”

“Tripe?”

“Tripe.” You nodded.

“What’s that?”

“Sheep’s stomach, or something like that.”

Lao showed his disgust. “What?”

“It’s gross.”

“Noted,” he said. “Anything else?”

“Mangos.”

“Mangos?” he laughed. “Why? They’re delicious.”

“Oh, I know. I love them.”

“Then why wont you eat them?”

“I’m allergic.”

Lao was silent as he stared at you, as if expecting you to say it was a joke. But when you didn’t laugh, or even smirk, he frowned. “Wait. Really?”

You nodded.

“But you said you love them.”

You nodded again and glanced to him with a slight grimace.

It clicked. He sighed and shook his head as he looked forward. “You eat them anyway, don’t you?”

“Sometimes.”

“Won't you hurt yourself?”

“Yeah. My throat swells up if I eat too much.”

Lao looked up at the ceiling and couldn’t help the disbelieving chuckle that escaped him. “You’d eat something that could kill you just because it tastes good?”

“Only a little.”

“You are unbelievable.”

“And yet, you believe me.” You grinned and stopped at the entrance to the bath house. You turned to look at him, but he’d turned and walked past you into the bath house. You stared after him.

Unfortunately, the temple was the home of The Order Of Light. Which was an order of monks. Monks. Not monks and nuns. Monks. There was no female section of the bath house. It wasn’t usually a problem because ever since your first visit to the bath house, any monks present would quickly leave to give you your privacy… But Kung Lao was going right in.

“You coming?” Lao called back, stopping to look back to you.

“Um… No. It’s okay. You can go first.”

Lao raised a brow. “What? C’mon, it’ll be fine.” But when you didn’t move, he sighed. “It’s big enough for the both of us to not see each other. You take one side, I’ll take the other.”

You thought about it for a bit before stepping forward to follow him in.

The bath house was a huge curved cavern. It had a large hot spring spanning the cavern, and a few smaller ones surrounding it. There were older lockers here and there for everyone to use. And there were baskets placed strategically around, filled with clean towels. Monks that were already bathing had noticed you walk in, and just as each time before, quickly climbed out of the pools and changed. You’d turned your back and stepped into a corner to avoid looking and give them their privacy. The last one to leave had told you he was, and you gave him a minute longer to leave before finally turning around.

Kung Lao was grinning at you.

“I really hate having to interrupt them,” you admitted.

He shrugged. “Their loss.”

You flushed and back handed his shoulder. He just laughed then nodded to the cavern’s bend. “You take the other side. I’ll take this one and stop any monks that come in.”

You couldn’t argue with that. Monks had walked in on you before. It wasn’t their fault. You were the only woman in this temple. Of course they’d occasionally forget about you. You nodded to Lao and walked off to the other end of the spring, hidden behind the corner… still, knowing Kung Lao was just on the other side made you nervous. He was mischievous. What if he snuck a peak?!

No. No, he wasn’t that much of a jerk. He wasn’t even much of a jerk now that he wasn’t testing you anymore. He was still a handful, and probably too confident for his own good, but you two hadn’t fought all day. A first.

You dragged in a deep breath, taking in the salty air. That was one thing you couldn’t help but ask a couple baths ago. A monk had told you that the ravine was in a salt desert, and the water in the springs was saltwater. But not like the ocean. Cleaner. And warm like a hot tub. You slipped out of your shoes and gi… And off came your underwear after staring at the corner for a while, making sure the coast was clear before you stepped into the pool.

You stayed near the edge and lowered yourself until the water came up to your neck. God, that felt so good. The hot water melted tension from your back and shoulders in the most welcoming way. You sighed in relaxation as you rested your head back against the rocks. The dense saltwater made you feel weightless and you let your arms float just below the surface. This was easily your favorite place in the temple. You woke to water burning your nose. Splashing, sitting up, you choked and coughed up water. Oh god, your sinuses were on fire. You’d sunk a bit too far in the water. You must have dozed off.

“You okay?!” Lao’s voice called over.

You tried to answer, but choked again.

“Y/N!”

You gasped and called out a strained, “Yeah!”

“What happened?” His voice sounded closer, as if he was just around the bend.

You hacked some saltwater up. “Nothing!” You choked again and blew out your nose hard, trying to clear the water from your sinuses. “Just almost drowning!”

Lao was quiet for a bit. “You sure you’re okay?” he asked cautiously.

You nodded, then quickly remembered he couldn’t see it. Duh. “Yeah. Fine.” You blew out your nose again and winced. It burned so bad.

“Alright…”

“Sorry. I’m good.”

You could hear him chuckle. It echoed through the cavern.

“Of all the things that could take me out…” You set up the coming joke. You always joked when you were nervous. You could hear him chuckle again. “Here lies Y/N, taken out by a punk ass hot spring…”

He laughed openly. You couldn’t help but laugh at yourself with him.

“You clean enough?” You asked. It was probably a good idea for you to get out before you actually did drown.

“Yeah, hold on.” He was still chuckling. You heard the splashing of what you assumed was him climbing out of the pool. You did the same and grabbed a towel to dry yourself off. It was a few minutes before he called over, “I’m good.”

You were as well by then. You walked to the corner and peaked around it. He had his pants on, but that was it. It was enough… right? He was rubbing a towel over his hair when you stepped into his view, and you did your best not to stare at him. Lao was cut. You assumed he was before, but now you knew. Now you could see it. He didn’t have an ounce of body fat on him. Just rock hard muscles. Did Liu have abs like that too?

Oh boy…

“You okay?” He broke the silence, noticing your vacant expression.

“Yeah. Great,” you answered quickly, walking past him. If he was behind you, you wouldn’t be able to see him… See those washboard abs. And he wouldn’t be able to see the red hue that absolutely covered your face. Even your ears were burning.

Don’t think about it. Don’t think about it. Don’t think about those abs and how the edges of his obliques were practically an arrow right to his—

NO!

You clenched your eyes shut and quickly left the bathhouse.

Okay. You could do this. You could do this. You were a nurse. It wasn’t like you’d never seen muscles like that… No you hadn’t. Why did you lie to yourself?

“You sure you’re okay?” Lao asked as he rejoined you, thankfully with his tunic back on. You sucked in a deep breath and nodded. But he didn’t seem convinced. “Your face is all red,” he pointed out, his brows sinking in concern.

You turned your face away and felt it grow hotter now that he’d noticed. “I’m fine. Sorry. Just wanted to get out of there…”

He grinned and offered you a small chuckle. “Don’t tell me that you’re afraid of water now?”

“No!”

He held his hands up defensively and laughed a bit more openly. “Just kidding!”

You frowned and sighed. “I just--”

Should you tell him? Or should you lie?

#mortal kombat #mortal kombat 2021 #liu kang #kung lao #raiden #reader insert #fanfic #fic #reader x character #ludi lin #max huang #tadanobu asano #new beginnings #reader x liu kang #reader x kung lao #liu kang x reader #kung lao x reader

[uhhhhhhhhhsblogyea]

♤| dragon ball shapeshifter au

storyline rundown

part two

tw: profanity !! a bit of gore and such

the story begins on kakarot's farm! he lives with his parents, bardock and gine, and his brother raditz.

kakarot takes his produce to the market to sell, talking to krillin who is a police officer watching over in case of robbery or stolen goods, with his wife 18 and his daughter marron.

he hangs out there and sells all his produce, making a whopping amount of money to give back to his mother to go towards their farm. so thats what he does.

later that night, raditz barged in through the door, huffing loudly and covered in purple blood. it had a reddish tint. gine and bardock jump to their feet, bardock still in his training gi and gine in her white shirt and some sweatpants. "raditz!? what happened?" bardock exclaimed, gine following up with "why are you covered in... purple blood!?" this caused kakarot to come out of his room in a rush, "h-h-holy s-shit! i didnt kill anyone i swear mom, mom, dad please, i wouldn't do that!" raditz panicked. "s-something tried to attack me! i didnt know what to do so i attacked back!!" he tries to wipe the blood off, it being on his face.

whatever happened, scared raditz enough to make him shake in fear and what seems to be regret despite it being to protect himself.

kakarot however, still was unsure what happened. his father said he would explain in the morning, the situation was too dire for kakarot to get involved - especially with the police.

in town, vegeta covered his bloodied chest, panting as he hid deep in an alleyway. "goddammit," he huffs, slicking his hair back to keep the human bangs out of his face. hes got a huge gash across his chest, thanks to that damned raditz he happened to work with. luckily, he was morphed into some other alien lifeform and not his original shift state. he slowly morphed into a bird, a finch, and flew off to him apartment. he always kept his window cracked just in case this were to happen. just his luck, we wont be able to eat and to heal he needs that energy for food or else hell be out asleep for awhile.

he decides calling off work, so thats what he does. what he doesnt expect is a man with a thick ass fucking tail and slicked back purple hair and red eyes to be reading a book, lounging like a king on his bed. "f... frieza!?" vegeta says, startled.

"ah hello my creation! lovely seeing you here, dont you think?" he throws the book off to the side, getting up and striding over to the bloodied vegeta. "aw looks like you got a paper cut." he jabs a finger into vegetas cut across his chest. vegeta groans in pain, a tentacle whipping around to hit frieza away into a safer distance, but the icejin blocks smoothly with his muscled tail.

from here:

wow!! you found out vegeta is a "creation" of friezas, but what exactly does that mean?

raditz gets taken in for questioning. he gets blamed for a murder that happened on the otherside of town, the law system being dumb sentenced him to 25 years in prision for a murder he didnt do

kakarot is confused, bardock telling him there arent any alien threats and it was a misunderstanding on the jury and judge's parts bc raditz was getting mugged and a murder far away happened at roughly the same time, and they were desperate to throw someone into jail.

this is a lie, to some extent. kakarot believes it, living happily thinking there are no threats

vegeta attacked raditz, needing food. shapeshifters need to eat hearts and lungs of animals as food

raditz is the one who cut him across the chest (thatd why he has a scar on his chest in the ref sheet)

kakarot has to bring crops and milk into a market farther into town sometime in the next week, it being an event ran by capsule corp, a company that produces a lot of housing and vehicles and being in business for 40 years being the anniversary that day.

vegeta is a mechanical manager, wearing fancy clothing that day since its technically a high spot in the ranks for capsule corp.

vegeta likes milk, surprisingly. it helps a lot when recovering damage, especially his species. this is when he meets kakarot

kakarot is running his stand with the crates of crops and glass jars of milk set out on display with their price, krillin with him

vegeta is annoyed he has to speak up to get the seller's attention so he grunts with an "ahem"

kakarot jumps, apologizing and asking what he wants to buy. vegeta gets his milk and some vegetables for someone he knows

"hey, whats with the fancy suit?"

"you dont know who i am?"

"no. should i?"

"i-? im vegeta! im manager of the mechanics in capsule corp!"

"oh. is the job hard?"

they conversate, as kakarot sells his produce happily listening as he was able to get the short man with a temper to talk about his job.

vegeta himself was caught off guard by this action but happily talks

this ends in kakarot running behing the stand's curtain and grabbing his business card so vegeta can have a discount on milk next time he decides to buy

vegeta takes the card walking off

the card has kakarots name and number on the back, a message saying "text me personally if you want extra, i dont mind taking some. you seem cool!"

vegeta is a bit ticked, but pockets the card

over time, vegeta and kakarot talk over text a bit, kakarot delivering him milk like an old time milk delivery boy

turns out he actually used to be one as a kid

turns out hes been into marial arts as well, a long time interest of vegetas

they bond over this, kakarot find himself growing a crush on vegeta

one time kakarot stops buy with a delivery unannounced, not knowing he typed the text but didnt send it. he knocks on vegetas apartment door, but no answer.

he checks to see if its unlocked, and it is so he lets himself in, just wanting to put the delivery on the counter and head out.

he doesnt expect to turn around and see a vegeta with a towel wrapped around his waist, tentacles coming out of his back, green eyes, and sharp ears, teeth, and claws. "K-KAKAROT!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" he yells, surprised. he doesn't have bangs either

"why do you have tentacles?? why do you look different? why do you have that scar?"

vegeta is caught off guard, not sure if he should push kakarot out or tell him the truth. one way or another he knows the truth will spread, so he carefully debates his options

he tells kakarot the truth, hes a shapeshifter and hes insanely dangerous

kakarot is surprised dangerous aliens exist

he tells vegeta this, and deep down vegeta is mad kakarot is sheltered

little do they know as they conversate and bond, growing closer to each other kakarot finds out vegeta made a vow not to ever get in a relationship no matter how much he envied them, especially a human relationship, a certain someone is watching them and listening in, theyre keeping tabs on vegetas and kakarots feelings

trust issues amirite?

later that night, kakarot says his goodbye heading home, heart pounding. wow!!!! vegeta is... great. very great. kinda cute too, i mean what!?? no!!

kakarot rants to himself aloud in his room, window open to keep himself cool, about vegeta as he debates his feelings. he doesnt care if this seems out of character in his friends terms, all they see from him anyway is a dense fightcrazed guy with a dysfunctional relationship with an ex and his son. he realized vegeta doesnt see him like that, but, what DOES vegeta see him as?

he calls it a night

he wakes up to a "thwap, thwap, thwap" against his wooden floor

he sits up, looking around and seeing a short figure sitting at his desk.

"whos there?"

"ah, youre awake monkey! i have valuable information for you, about your lovely vegeta." the voice is squeaky

"and, who is telling me this?" kakarots interest is piqued, not seeing the mysterious figure as a threat, as of now at least

"oh-hohoho! im dr. cold! but please, call me frieza. doctor cold is my father's name."

"and what do you have to tell me about vegeta?"

"mmm, are you sure you want to know?" he gets up, beginning to pace

"theres a catch isnt there" kakarot realizes, serious

"oh! maybe you arent so dense afterall. yes, there iss monkey. its simple, deliever some of your left over crop to my facility tomorrow, i already left the address on a paper over on that... pitiful little desk of yours." frieza pauses. "vegeta will kill you if you arent careful. hes hungry, and he wants that heart. but... i think the poor creation wants it in more than one way. kill him before he kills you."

frieza hands kakarot a box cutter

"thats the only thing that will kill him. if you dont do it i expect that delivery tomorrow by midnight. if you dont show, and theres no news of him being dead, youll be a brilliant collection to my creations, monkey!" the man laughs in joy, clasping his hands together as his red eyes pierce through kakarot

kakarot reluctantly agrees, unsure how this will play out

PART TWO WILL BE MADE SOON!!!

anyway heres the part 1 of the rundown.

#shs goku #shs frieza #shs #shs vegeta #shs dbz au #dbz au #kakavege #frieza being a damn brat lol #dragon ball #I REALLY HOPE YALL FIND THIS INTERESTING #theres a lot that went into it #txt post #long post

[hollyhomburg]

I'm fairly confused about this entire situation, honestly. I saw the original girl comment about whether or not she was entirely sure to feel comfortable on a page meant to do that exact thing. In my opinion (which is fairly confused atm), you were both in the wrong. Of course, you don't have to answer anything about your gender or whether or not you have certain body parts, I can definitely understand that! But the extra meanness was a bit uncalled for. They just didn't want to feel unsafe :/

Also, everyone deals with pain differently. Whether or not if it's something that seems a bit pushy or not. I feel for both sides of this weird miscommunication, I really do. I guess that's just my inner-understanding lol. So yeah, I feel for you! I know what it feels like to go through things that annoy you and cause disruption amongst your inner self, but my heart also goes out to the girl that was painted as a transphobe when all she wanted to do was feel was safe.

P.S, this was absolutely not coming from a place of anger! It is your choice whether to insult me or realize that people have different opinions; I will understand if either one is chosen! I wish you well, and if the girl is also reading this, I wish you well too and I really do hope that you get closure and understanding because I've also gone through something similar to what you have. It's so painful, but stay strong and you'll be able to say that you came out of it alive :)

----------------------

First off, I want you to know that the anger in the response is not directed at you the asker of this question. but at the person from last night. second, I’m probably not going to respond to any more asks on this topic, because I'm tired. 

okay so let me put it this way for you. you would not under any circumstances pull down Anyone's pants to check their genitals in public. right? or demand that they pull down their pants for you and expose themselves in a public way just so that you can make sure they don’t have a penis. 

The fact of the matter is that someone else's genitals are none of yours nor anyone else's business. And asking about this is not only violating and transphobic but also inappropriate. (I shouldn’t have to clarify that this is transphobic at this point. before you want to argue that- do your research, google is free).

what you seem to misunderstand is that transphobia is an act of aggression. to be transphobic is to cause trauma, to trigger, to be violent. this person asking me about my genitals was an act of violence. and I responded like it was one- with meanness that was called for because I felt hurt. because what they said was hurtful. 

as someone who has never felt safe in my entire life, both because of abuse, rape, and my identity- that doesn't give me a right to threaten someone elces safety because my safety demands it. each and all traumas are valid, and just because they wanted to feel safe on my page doesn't give them a right to take away my safety. especially because this is my page and my safe space that I have created with hours of uncompensated work. So no- they don't have a right to take away my safety and security for their own.  

asking on anon is also a little sus, they didn’t reach out through dm- which is how all things of a personal nature should be. they knew there was a possibility I would take it wrong and didn’t want to be blocked from my page. they feel entitled to my work and entitled to my body in the same way. i wont apologize for trying to preserve this page, and I won’t apologize for acting for matching their level of meanness. 

when you have trauma there are so many things that are triggering for other people that aren’t triggering for you. The real world doesn't come with specific trigger warnings and you have to eventually come to that conclusion with trauma, you will be triggered for no reason at one point, and its a sad fact but it will happen. 

for example- one of my triggers is piano music. to this day I can’t watch my favorite idol play piano because it is too much of a trigger to me. 

But I would NEVER insinuate that min yoongi needed to stop playing piano music just because at one point in my life my stalker would blast piano music outside my bedroom window at 3 am to keep me from sleeping for weeks at a time. or because I was constantly sleep deprived growing up because he wouldn’t let me sleep- my triggers and my reality are irrelevant to min yoongi enjoying the thing he enjoys, just like that person’s trauma is irrelevant to my own. It would be mean and uncalled for me to demand he stops doing something he loves just because it's a trigger for me. People will exist outside of your trauma and that's okay.  

(tw; rape) I’ve been rapped by three men in my life. One was a frat boy in college who I woke up to telling me my hole was bleeding and wanted me to leave because I was getting it all over his sheets. another was a old man, it happened when I was so little that I barely remember it and honestly, all I remember is how much it hurt and how dirty his hands were, he had a lot of dirt under his nails and I remember thinking ‘i don't think that should go inside me’ as a fucking 5-year-old

And the third, was three years ago when an American gi rapped me in hongdae, South Korea, I met him at a bar called mikes cabin. I wasn’t a perfect victim, i’d just had a fight with my soulmate and I went out looking for trouble and I found it. but after I changed my mind he didn’t care, he shoved his dick in my ass without my consent. I bled all over his sheets too. choked on the blood coming out my nose after he slapped me. i remember he shoved his phone in my face to take pictures. somewhere out there there are pictures of me getting raped and I don’t even know where they are or how many people have seen them. 

I don't even know his name only that he had a rose tattoo over his heart. my deadnames middle name is rose. My mom calls me ‘rosebud’ or ‘rosie’ more than my dead name. is it a trigger for me? yes. it is. of course, it is. how could it not be?  

I’ve been raped. i know what they’ve gone through, I know where their pain comes from but my pain is valid too. my genitals could be a trigger to that anon, but defining them in a binary of woman and man is a trigger for me. I am a person and they are a person and both of our triggers are equally valid. but this is my place. this is my expression. 

so why did I act meanly? first off. they violated me by asking me invasive questions and demanded a response. and then secondly; when I asked them not to and told them no- they invalidated my consent and my trauma. then thirdly- they misgendered me- fully committing to being a transphobe. that's why I was mean- because they were mean first.  

this is the only time I’ll explain why I was justified. I hope they get closure too- but their closure isn’t going to come from violence against me or any other trans person. one day that person is probably going to meet a trans woman, and I hope they know better than to call them a boy just because they have a penis. trans people aren’t your punching bags for your trauma. 

trauma doesn't give you the excuse to be a transphobe, no matter what happened to you. you have to learn to treat others with dignity and respect no matter their gender identity or how they trigger you. Because people can’t control what parts of themselves are triggering to you. 

This is the last I’ll talk about this. I'm gonna delete all the other asks asking me about this. I’m not going to talk about it anymore. if you can’t understand why what they did was bad, get off my page. I don’t want you here. 

#i put it under a readmore because it's long and triggering #Anonymous

[consciouschunkofmoss]

Sorry for the amount😅:

2. do you believe in soulmates?

4. describe your dream house

13. do you have a signature in your style/everyday outfits?

14. do you have any pets? if not, do you want some in the future?

30. do you always remember your dreams?

44. do you like it when you’re awaken by the sounds of birds chirping?

50. even numbers or odd?

oh no its ok !! and thanks sm for sending them <3

2. i think that this is a concept i have always been afraid of, as an aromantic and romance-repulsed person, being shown these types of things that have always at their vore been romance-focused made me rather sick, given that a future in which i would be destined to be forcefully in a romantic relationship with someone was not that appealing to me as i was younger, but with time and lots of processing and thinking and specially like. actually maturing and growing up, i grew to appreciate and truly sympathize with such a belief ! and i do have to say that i have my own positive yet nuanced views upon it as of today, but hope that in the future ill come to see this as something i can wholly believe in ^^"

(omg this i was way too long sjxnsjxhs)

4. maybe a house in which it may have more than one floor so that things wont be too much into each other, but that its still able to make things look comfortable and not so far out of reach, not too spacious. where i will have the proper space to grow my roots in, but also house those who i love, even if temporarily, being a place where i can have my own little world to exist in but also share with others too. maybe have it be in a more warm setting/atmosphere or even aesthetic, and where i can find the sun through the windows when waking up and the moon shining close to any and all slight wodden fissures when i go to sleep, choosing to carefully stupid outsides activities from my own - and as those are very potent sources of energy, my plants would absolutely thrive but also my crystals would always have a place to take energy form and be properly charged.

13. not really, but i do like to think about that specific meme where im the type of gay to wear more open and bigger shirts, whilst choosing to wear shorter pants/shorts that hug more at my features, if that makes sense haha its probably the body dysmorphia that made friends with my gender dysphoria, but i did come to enjoy wearing clothes like that ngl ! maybe like for upper parts i usually choose things like big t-shirt or smocks (the only possible word i could find in english), with more excess in fabric, ones that look pretty and flow-y when met with the soft yet constant wind. (and as for pants and things like that i usually choose leggings or more fitting jeans as well)

14. i do !! my dear and beloved cat sol <3 (if you want photos i can totally send them to you later haha) hes very energetic by night so i try and enterntain him while im still awake, but mostly by morning likes to lazily walk around the house and snuggle with me in bed ;u;

fun fact ! his name is sol because my mom decided that and would not take any other suggestions and also bc hes orange :)

30. not really, but i do have some more traumatic and memorable ones that tend to stick to me throughout the years. most of the time i remember most of the atmosphere and ambience than the actual course of narrative they take or people that are part of it. dreams are a very touchy subject for me as i never really had any "good" ones since a long long time, as they always turn out to a more negative side no matter how things are going. but i do remember some of them at least, and i think that only happens because of them being nightmares and not just. ordinary or "good" dreams.

44. really really depends sjxnsjxhs some tones can be way too much for me and contribute greatly to an early headache (from the factor that im very sensitive to sounds), but some can be quite pleasant if not so high pitched or constant ! there is one sound made by a very common bird where i lived that gives this very saddening yet terribly nostalgic feeling, and i think thats one that no matter how many i hear ill always be kind of happy to wake up to it, just so i can remember a bit more about the past while i stir awake yet try and not think much about anything else around me, just the memories.

50. even numbers, of course ! and that is because most of them are very warm to me and bring a lot of comfort stability, for some reason haha (specially four, two and five). maybe given both my ocd and synesthesia i find that building patterns within things that make my brain feel more at ease and peaceful can always bring a lot better results than with ones that im not that ok with or that bring more of a cold tone to the atmosphere in general (just like nine, seven and one)

aand i think thats it ! ^^

i hope you get to enjoy my answers, even if they came to be this long sjxsjxhs

#asks #ray !! #gotta go to sleep now tho </3 see you later my dear !

[jenna-jayde-the-renagade]

So my life has gone to shit.. I dont trust anybody anymore, and honest to god I cant help but keep thinking of ways to end it. My mom keeps telling me how to feel about this whole thing, that I should be grateful that i got in finally to see a specialist. Reality is I dont even trust those subhuman animals anymore, and frankly they're gonna have to earn my trust. After 4 fucking years, my life, my future being ruined. My mental health going downhill, all for the second time now. Add on to that, I dont get any meds for the pain so this has pushed me into addiction now for a second time. I've been dehumanized and humiliated, treated with nothing but the utmost disrespect while being stigmatized for being mentally ill, transgender and a recovering addict for most of it. They ignored me for 4 years, my body is damaged, and frankly help just might have came too little too late. I wont just suffer through the next one, the next time this happens I'm gonna end my life, my suffering on my own god damn terms. Atleast I still have control over that..

Fuck the canadian healthcare system. Some days I honestly just want to start selling drugs, and fly to a country where I can just pay to play and get the best care in the god damn world. Cause 4 years now I've been telling them to refer me to a specialist, I've been telling them that it's probably crohns or some other GI issue. They need to do a colonoscopy and a scope to find it, so that's what I would ask for. I would never get it, so i more or less gave up on the healthcare system. They would leave me on the floor thrashing in pain for hours. Treating me like a drug addict in withdrawal when I didnt even have any opioids in my system. I would be lucky if I got an IV for fluids, and even more lucky if they pumped me full of a bunch of over the counter drugs and others that didnt work like gravol, tauridol, buscopan, zofran, and haliperidol. I would tell them each time, that this was the hundredth time they tried gravol, and it doesnt help people when they're screaming in pain. They treat the nausea. Its bullshit because I am in so much pain that its making me nauseous and until they get rid of the pain, the vomiting is just gonna continue. They always treat me like I'm full of shit, and when I turn out to be right and continue puking, thrashing and screaming in pain, they just get angry at the fact they were wrong. Our doctors and nurses are a bunch of sociopathic, apathetic adult children who in my experience take pleasure in watching you suffer. The worse I get the more they smile. They are so stupid, blind almost because if their stupid fucking machine says I'm ok then I guess it's all in my head. They only think that theres nothing wrong with me because theyve only ever done a blood test or an xray. Never ever once have they done a single test that would have found the issue, crohns cant be found just on a blood test. The emergency room doctors think it can be, my family doctor and everybody else I've talked to says otherwise.

On January 1st I was having another flare up, and they shoved me in the psych observation room because they genuinely didnt want to deal with me. They ignore me, and I keep going in because I want help. I dont want to end up relapsing again cause I cant take the god damn pain! But nope, I get treated like a crazy person now.. they did it against my will. And they even tried to take my phone and my keys. I was puking constantly, I needed water to keep hydrated and they left me for 4 hours, locked in, no meds, no help or nothing. So I just cracked.. I had nothing to barf in, to wipe my nose with, or to wipe the cold sweat off me. So I puked in every corner of that room, I puked beside the bed especially because a mop wouldnt fit in there. I pissed in the corner, I would hack up some phlegm and spit it all over the floors and walls, I blew snot rockets on every surface too! After a while some nurse came in and gave me a barf bag. I threw it on the floor and just continued to puke over every hard surface in the place. I was puking every 5 seconds I swear, and the doctor finally came in at 3 hours and 15 minutes. At 3.5 hrs they give me two pills. I straight up tell them there is no point in even taking them. I couldnt even keep water down and these people are stupid enough to make me take pills? Come on. You need to hold it in for atleast an hour to see even the most minimal affects. I was puking every 5 seconds, to the point that I puked before I took the pills, and I puked them out the moment after I swallowed. They had given me a fucking gravol tab, and some Ativan, the latter of which I couldnt even hold under my tongue long enough. I barfed it onto the floor when it was half dissolved. They come back with this clear liquid shit in a shot glass. I swallowed it right after I puked. The liquid burned my insides, and i puked that shit out even quicker. I asked them to give me IV medications for that exact reason, I always ask for IV medications cause its literally a waste of your time and mine to just pump me full of pills when I can't keep them down and they hurt my tummy as they dissolve. They tell me to just "breathe deeply and relax" and to "just try jayden, you gotta try", so then I try, and when they end up being wrong, and I can't take shit. They end up saying that I'm manipulating, that I'm drug seeking or I'm not trying hard enough to make it work. Absolute bullshit, over the course of 4 years I have quite literally told them what to do. I have multiple family members with this disease, and my grandmother was ignored like this too. She told me to ask them for a colonoscopy and a scope, and to ask them to treat the pain, not the nausea cause the pain literally causes the nausea. The sooner the pain is gone the sooner I can be normal and tell them what's going on. Instead I'm left to suffer in the worst pain a human being can feel. I get treated like shit and told it's all in my head. I gave up on getting a diagnosis in year two. I just want to shoot dope whenever the pain comes. Dope atleast takes it away, after all they would be giving me some of the strongest shit they have at the hospital if I was some boomer with a sprained ankle. It would take the pain away. Thats for sure. Being a mentally ill, drug using, autistic tranny they just see that. I get nothing. No help, no answers, not even some relief when my screaming can be heard far and wide.

I want to die right now, and I keep trying to think of a painless way to do it.. buying $400 worth of street fentanyl and slipping into a nice, peaceful opioid coma seems like a wonderful idea right now.. that would end the fucking suffering atleast..

I wont be wearing a colostomy bag. Colostomy bags arent sexy, they are fucking disgusting and you cant just be body positive when you have a fucking bag full of your own shit hanging off you, and your only way of having penetrative sex sewed up permanently and taken away from me. Not like I could even be a decent fuck for anybody at this point anyways. Its painful to shit, let alone anything else. I dont want to give up food either. I love food, food is literally my life and the only way I have to bond with certain people! Like my family for example. Nothing makes me just want to slip.into that coma more then the worry of the future.

Will I be sitting at a family gathering eating bland gluten free, dairy free, all organic 100% vegan fair trade horse shit on a plate while my family actually gets to enjoy the food I used to be able to eat? Moms spaghetti, grandmas meat pies, the baked goods, fresh tomatoes out of my garden and others. A good fucking steak even? Cause honestly a birthday isnt a birthday if I dont have my birthday meal.

I know for a fact my body is damaged from 4 years of suffering. I used to bounce back, now it takes the wind out of my sails for a month.

Needless to say, I just want to fucking die more then anything else. Positivity and anything I love is gone, and all that I have left is knowing that Alberta health services, coast mountain health services, providence health services, and interior health services have all fucked me in the biggest way humanely possible. So thankful for free fucking healthcare!!

You get what you bloody well pay for!!

#thisiswhattranslookslike #girlslikeus #transgender #mtf #trans #transition #hrt #transgender girl #transformation #chronic illness #chronic pain #chronically sick #crohns disease

[leila1]

OS: Cursed

Aik din hum wohi ban jaate hain jin se hum nafrat karte hain

–Main Hoon Na

" you are nothing but a characterless woman, who only knows how to trap rich men!"

He still remembered the day when he had insulted her, the damned day when all he did was spit venom at her. But that was what Arnav Singh Raizada was made of. 

Collateral damage followed by unavoidable regret. 

Wasn't he known for his logical strategies and smart planning? What had happened then? That day it wasn't the Arnav Singh Raizada that the world knew for his foresight but a monster unleashed. 

Why was she surprised, isn't that what he always did? Hurting everyone, specifically her, around him as he pleased?

"No you listen to me!" he wouldn't let her speak not even a word.

He had had enough and those fake tears of hers would do no good.

Only if he had let her speak that day, only if he had given her a chance to explain. 

Arnav Singh Raizada never made quick and irrational decisions but that day he did, perhaps the most irrational decision of his life, to separate his wife from his existence. He never the one to apologize but that day he did something that he was ready to apologize every single moment till eternity, he would hold his ears, fold his hands, and even go on his knees.

Anything.

Anything to bring back the old Khushi, the girl he fell in love with. The girl who fell from the ramp, only to land in his arms with a trembling face, shivering body, eyes moist ready to tear up. She never cried anymore. Neither had she trembled, no longer did she smile, all traces of expression drenched from her.  Ironically she had become the opposite of her name. 

Khushi Kumari Gupta had been replaced with Mrs Arnav Singh Raizada, not the chirpy girl that used to brighten his day but a wife of a businessman who attended charity functions, and did everything for the sake of reputation. 

______________

He couldn’t a remember a time when his life wasn’t a mess.  And he had no one to blame but himself. 

It has been five years since that damned day but it still hurt like a fresh piece of glass cutting into skin. 

Sipping his morning coffee while staring out the huge French doors, leaning against the walls, piercing rays reflecting on the blue water, Arnav began his thinking process all over again like every single day.

What do I do? What can I possibly do make everything the way it was?

He felt stabbed, pierced and torn. But did any of that matter now? Did he even suffer the fraction of her pain? It was nothing compared to the torture he had single-handedly inflicted upon her. 

A tear rolled down as he took the next sip, helplessness traveling through his veins.  It felt like nothing was in his control anymore, it felt like Khushi has become a stone, nothing would make her react. As if life had become a mechanical routine. 

He didn't know what was worse: he was the reason of her current state or that she had become what he used to be once, heartless, emotionless, distant and isolated.

Perhaps this is what she meant by when she said money can't buy happiness.

What was the meaning of all this money when he didn't have the happiness of his life? His Khushi? She was here but not here,  getting through life on survival mode. 

Not even her favorite delicacies made her smile, she would only eat them upon family’s insistence but the magic was missing.  Love was not something she was familiar with, not anymore just like he was once upon a time.

She filled his life with color, in return he robbed hers. 

Khushi entered the room silently and placed the folded clothes in the closet, her side of the portion which resembled to his now, was replaced from the vibrant hues to the plain pastels.

He turned around and stared at the robotic figure in front of him.

Her back was facing him, long black tresses up to her waist were held back by a few pins at the back of her head. She no longer wore the bangles whose noise was melody to his ears or her signature jhumkas that would sparkle and convince him of her presence even at a distance.

His heart wrenched at the sight his eyes witnessed. This is not the woman he fell in love with. Why had she changed so much? Was his love not enough for her to come back to her old self ?

"Khushi promise me you will never stop loving me" he asked holding her hand in his

"I won't I promise"

"promise me you wont change"

"I won't change but time will"

Her eyes started to well up and he did not understand what brought on the sudden shift. 

Today he understood the weight of her words. 

He placed the half empty cup on the table beside the recliner and moved towards the closet.

He held her by her wrists as she began to slide the doors close and brought her towards the bed ignoring her questioning gaze.

For the first few minutes she kept looking at his hands that still held her wrists, in anger, confusion or to avoid his gaze he did not understand.

Not being able to hold it any longer he asked

" kuch maangoon ga to do gi?"

He asked directly looking into her eyes with the burden of guilt and her miseries his shoulders slumped in an early defeat. 

"kia chahiye" 

Her monotonous voice lacked the chirpiness he desperately missed. She had been reduced to a corporate wife. 

"mujhe Khushi chahiye" he spoke as his grip on her hands grew tender, the sincerity in his voice more apparent. 

"Khushi Kumari Gupta" he whispered, his voice sounding hoarse and broken, lined with desperation. 

Her love wasn’t gone, but something had been lost within her. She couldn’t give him what she didn’t have. 

It felt like an era had gone by since she heard her complete name, that she once flaunted with pride. Khushi’s identity had been crushed by the weight of Mrs Arnav. 

An unfamiliar flame of warmth lit in the corner of her heart and she finally decided to look into those pools of brown.

"Kia tum mujhe wohi purani wali Khushi de sakti ho?" 

It was more of a  plea than a question, a prisoner desperate for freedom. 

A tear rolled down her cheek  and his eyes welled up seeing a glimpse of the girl who still had his heart. The same girl who filled every part of his day with her chatter and memories. 

A flame of hope ignited somewhere in the existence of Arnav Singh Raizada and he felt a gush of faith run within him. Maybe God was there after all and miracles did happen. 

#arnav singh raizada #khushi kumari gupta #oneshot #writing #arshi #ipkknd #iss pyaar ko kya naam doon #os: cursed

[the-gray-ghosty]

LLoyd dyes his hair/sibling fluff

so I have seen the idea where LLoyd dyes his hair, and decided i’d write about it but with some sibling fluff added in. (Mostly Lloyd, Nya, and Skylar.) Enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Skylar’s POV~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What colors do you want?” Skylar asks Lloyd, looking at all of the options of hair dye.

“I think that sky blue is pretty,” Nya says, pointing at the light blue dye on the shelf,  

“But you can do whatever you want.” Nya says with a kind smile. 

Lloyd picks up the blue she brought up and puts it in the basket Skylar is holding. He then grabs a green bottle from the shelf and looks at it. 

“I like this one, it's bright.” Lloyd says as he looks at the girls. “What do you think?” 

“I think it's great!” Skylar says as she puts it in the basket. She loves the color green on Lloyd, and is glad he is also going for blue. It will look pretty damn cool. 

“Now we need gloves and a shower cap. I'll get the cap, you guys want to go find the gloves?” Skylar asks the two ninjas. They both nod and walk away. Skylar laughs to herself as she sees the clock on the wall of the convenience store they are at. It reads 12:34am. Nya and Skylar were having a sleepover when they had both woken up to screaming coming from Lloyd's room. They rushed in and found him having a terrible nightmare. Nya woke him up and tried to calm him down, for he often has mental breakdowns after nightmares this bad. After they calmed him down Nya whispered to her how they should distract him and Skylar mentioned hair-dying. That's how they ended up here. She wasn’t upset though. She would do Anything for Lloyd, especially after he saved her (and carried her halfway across Ninjago) during their fight with the colossus. 

She turns the corner to see Lloyd and Nya physically wrestling for a bag. It’s a  neon pink shower cap. Lloyd looks up from where he is laying on the ground and quickly jumps up, muttering something about stupid pink shower caps. 

“You gotta help me Skylar,” he says breathlessly while Nya stands in triumph behind him. 

“Nya wants me to wear a pink shower cap and I really don't want to.” he starts to smile, then laughs. Skylar knows that he really doesn't care, it's more for fun and his pride. 

“Awwww I think you would look beautiful in it Lloyd, and that's 2 out of 3 votes so sorry bud.” she says with a shit-eating grin. Lloyd laughs and puts the cap in the basket.  They walk up to the counter, passing the candy aisle. Skylar pretends to not notice when Lloyd gets a handful of candy bars into the basket, smiling like a little kid. He kinda is a little kid, she thinks sadly, remembering the tea. 

The dude at the counter looks half asleep, and surprised they are there, which is weird because Lloyd and Nya fighting for the cap was definitely not quiet. 

They walk out into the dark street with their bags, and Skylar slightly shivers from the crisp air. Lloyd hands her his sweatshirt, which she realizes isn't his sweatshirt as she puts it on. 

“Is this Coles?” she asks, pointing to the symbol of earth on the back. 

“Yea, I took it from him.” Lloyd says with a smug grin. 

“He has very comfy hoodies.” Nya adds on. “I steal his sweatpants too.”

Both laugh at that, and  Skylar giggles. 

Lloyd and Nya create their power dragons and Skylar jumps on the dragon with Lloyd, and they fly for about 15 minutes up to the monastery.

~~~~~~~~time skip~~~~~~~~~~~~nobody’s POV~~~~~~~~~~~~

After they sneaked back into the monastery they settled in Nya’s bedroom/bathroom. They all know Nya has the biggest bathroom so that’s where it would be best to dye Lloyd’s hair. 

“I'm so excited!” Lloyd exclaims happily while setting up the dyes on the counter. He adds-

“I’ve always wanted to dye my hair!” and Nya rubs his golden locks and snorts.

“What do you think Kai’s reaction will be? And Wu, and everyone else?” she asks the two others smiling. Lloyd and Skylar start laughing, both imagining everyone’s reactions. 

Nya then claps her hands together and dramatically exclaims;

“Well Lloyd, you ready to become beautiful?” 

“I'm already beautiful, but hell yea!” Skylar snorts at that response from the green ninja. 

Skylar squeezes each bottle of dye (green and blue) into their seperate bowls while Nya makes Lloyd sit in the big chair in front of the mirror and she starts sectioning off his hair. 

“I guess after this the boys won't be able to call you Rapunzel anymore.”

 Nya laughs at Skylar’s comment and shakes her head. 

“The boys and their dumb nicknames, I swear.” she mutters, snickering. 

Skylar turns on Nya’s music speaker and turns on auto-play for some background sound, then walks over and helps Nya section off Lloyd's hair. 

~~~~~~~~~~time skip~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Too late to turn back now, green-bean.” Nya states excitedly as she starts dying his hair. Nya was painting with the green dye while Skylar was painting with the blue dye. They had bought gloves and rubber bands at the store also, the bands were around sections telling each girl where to dye what color. 

Lloyd slightly clears his throat and starts talking to the girls;

“To be honest, I'm really excited. I have been wanting a change for a while, and this is so fun! It's also...it's really nice of you guys to do this for me. I know it's really late, and...thanks.”

“Aww Lloyd you are so sweet! I would give you a hug but my hands are kind of covered in blue so you will get hugged later.'' Skylar says with a laugh. Nya nods in harmony. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~time skip~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Ready to rinse it out?” 

“Hell yes!” Lloyd cries as he jumps up off the chair and runs over to the bathtub, where he turns on the water. It's been an hour of sitting, waiting for the dye to sink in. Nya walks over and scrubs the back of his head. There is soooo much dye coming out of his hair, running into the tub. 

“FSM this better not stain my bathtub.” Nya mutters. Lloyd chitters at that. 

After about 15 minutes of Lloyd rinsing off his hair, he sits back into the chair and Skylar grabs the blow dryer.

Skylar combs and dries his hair, and Nya sits on the counter and watches. Lloyd is faced away from the mirror because he insisted it had to be a surprise.

“Whether it's a good surprise or a bad surprise, I don't know” he says with a laugh and a huge smile on his face. 

It’s now about 3:30am, and it's a surprise none of the other ninjas have woken up. They aren't really being that quiet, Lloyd thinks, listening to the Katy Perry coming out of the speaker. 

“And...we’re done!” Skylar exclaims as Nya and Lloyd cheer. 

“Are you ready to see your hair?” 

“Heck yes!” Lloyd declared and spun the chair around. 

“WOAH THIS IS SO AWESOME!!” Lloyd jumps up and runs his hands through his now green and blue hair. 

“I LOVE IT!!” he cries out as he snatches both Skylar and Nya in a hug. 

“Thank you both, you are amazing; the best sisters I could ever ask for.” Skylar beams with happiness at that comment, and Nya giggles. 

“Well I don't know about any of you, but I am dead tired,” Nya starts to say, watching Lloyd play with his new colored hair. 

“Do you guys wanna hit the sack?” 

Skylar nods and turns off the lights in the bathroom. 

“We can clean up tomorrow.'' Lloyd tittered at that and started walking to the door. 

Nya jumps up. “Wait, why don't you sleep in here with us?” 

Lloyd turns to face her as Skylar adds; 

“Yes we have a mattress in the closet, here let me-” she jumps up and runs into the closet, pulling out a foam mattress and some blankets. Lloyd absolutely beams. 

“Thanks guys, this means so much” he states as he lays down on the make-shift bed, knowing that he wont have any more nightmares tonight. 

“Honestly though I can’t wait for everyone's reactions, we will have to make a plan tomorrow to show them.'' Skylar says while giggling. “Goodnight guys.” She hears 2 responses and falls asleep. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~morning, 9am~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~Lloyd’s POV~~~~~~~

Lloyd wakes up to giggling and realizes he isn't in his own bed. He panics, then remembers what happened last night. He rolls over and sees his sisters laying on Nya’s bed watching TV. 

“Morning girls! He cheerfully exclaims as they both jump, neither had noticed he was awake. 

Nya sits up and smiles at the boy with colored hair. 

“I'm sooooo excited to show the team!” Nya says quickly, and Skylar and Lloyd both laugh in agreement. 

“We need to make a plan, are they all awake yet?” he asks the girls.

“Yes, they are all awake. Zane came up and asked us if you wanted to play videogames with them but we refused. We told him you were still sleeping.'' Skylar tells Lloyd as he stands up and stretches. 

“They are all in the video game room, even Wu.-” Skylar gasps. “What if Nya and I went down and watched them play, totally normal right? Then you come down and just sit down next to us, like nothing is wrong? You know how they get with videogames, we should see how long it takes them to notice!” Lloyd snorts and starts laughing at this idea. 

“Hell yes, that is what we are doing.” 

Both Nya and Skylar have huge grins on their faces as they walk downstairs and sit on the farthest away couch from the couch the other ninja are on in the gaming room. A couple of the guys say good morning, (Cole, Zane and Jay) but none of the others really notice they are there.

That's when chaos starts. When Lloyd walks in.

It was fine when he first walked in, saying good morning. He walks in front of the other boy’s couch and goes to sit with Nya. Cole is the first to notice. He doubles back, staring at Lloyd, then bursts out laughing. Zane and Jay turn to see what he is laughing at and see it. Zane isn't fazed, just says;

“Cool look!” While Jay on the other hand jumps up and runs to Lloyd, grabbing a handful of his now green/blue hair, saying

“OH MY GoSH THIS IS SO COOL! WHEN DID YOU DO THIS???” to which Nya responds with;

“Last night.” with a smug grin and Skylar nods. 

Wu had just put a hand on his forehead and looked either disappointed or trying not to smile. Actually, Lloyd thought, he looked both. 

That’s when Kai ran over, and saw. He looks like he’s about to pass out. That's what makes Lloyd lose it. The look on Kai’s face of confusion. He is laughing so hard there are tears in his eyes and the girls are giggling as well.

After the chaos slows down, Lloyd answers the big questions; 

“We did it last night, around 3am I think.” he responds, looking at Nya for confirmation, she nods, saying that yes it was around 3am. That's when Jay noticed something. 

“Wait, green and blue? That's my color! Does that mean I'm your favorite brother?” Kai then jumps up and retorts; “Obviously I'm his favorite brother.”  The two start bickering, but not meanly, more like brotherly-arguing. 

Lloyd steps in and stops the argument by saying

“Actually if the blue stands for anyone here it's Nya.” Nya beams and looks at the boys with a look that says “Ha Ha Ha I Win!” Lloyd snickers.  

Lloyd gets many more nicknames from his brothers after dying his hair, but he loves how colorful it is. And a few months after it wore out, he went to his sisters for help dying it again, this time pink.

#ninjago #lloyd garmadon #nya smith #skylar #lego ninjago #lego ninjago: masters of spinjitzu #funny #sorry its so long

[mejomonster]

still uh moderately convinced my thyroid or something related is making things worse

#rant #health issue related #maybe i should just Ask for a referal to an endocrinologist before the end of october idk #i hope my allergist calls back with a treatment plan #i have confirmed the day i take the thyroid supplements i bought i got considerably more energy #and my body digests and processes food through better!!! #which is the CORE issue here. since it NOT being able to do that is why i had to starve for a month and probably why i had to go to ER 3 #times in the last month. and is literally WHAT i need fixed right now asap so i can reliably eat and just live normally again thanks ahhhh #future me it was like Noticeable. i was constipated yesterday WITH all the gi doctor meds somehow. and after that supplement. im not #ate the same foods. nothing else was different. only other possible cause #is deciding not to eat after 2nd dose of gi medicine meal. but i feel i've varied that considerably #and that didnt effect the medicines effectiveness before? #i am still riding the energy boost from the thyroid supplement its why im even awake and able to type and work today #in other news i predict tomorrow will be tired as all hell cause i cant take any medicines supplements today #so tomorrow my body is probs going back to 'we r dying' functionality wooh. AND i gotta eat toast tomorrow for the test which my stomach wil #not like. anyway fingers crossed i do not puke during the test tomorrow. they told me to bring zofran so i probably wont #i am like 95% sure some hypothyroidism or related issue is at play cause all those symptoms go hand in hand with the Severe version of wtf #ive been dealing with. mainly the sensitive to cold. intensely unbelievably constipated to the point laxatives dont work in large quantities #and my digestive system working so goddamn slow just to make matters worse for trying to hold down food. #also the MEGA fatigue which is why i cant work. and the inability to lose weight cause i basically was unable to for the last year and kept #gaining no matter what. and i only lost weight this past month due to having to starve outright #upside to that side effect tho i guess? im almost back to 150 which is where i was at beginning of september. so im guessing my nutrient lev #els are more stable again or will be soon

[bonniefms]

did  you  see  𝒷𝑜𝓃𝓃𝒾𝑒  𝓇𝒾𝓋𝑒𝓇𝓈  ?  looking  as  broke  as  ever  .   rumor  has  it  she  is  usually  finicky  and  boisterous  but  is  also  known  to  be  hedonistic  and  exuberant  .  we’ll  see  about  that  .  they  kind  of  remind  me  of  clinging  to  sentimental  objects  ,  the  lingering  taste  of  peach  vodka  ,  daydreams  of  tan  legs  leading  her  out  of  this  god  forsaken  town  .  maybe  because  they’re  a  pisces  .  they’ve  been  living  around  here  for  six  years  .  i  wonder  when  they’ll  make  it  out  ...

GREETINGS  !!    im  gi  and  am  so  excited  to  be  back  !   for  those  who  don’t  know  i  use  to  play  ziggy  ,  the  aron  piper  fc  before  real  life  got  the  best  of  me  .     below  the  cut  ,  you’ll  find  everything  you  need  to  know  about  my  new  baby  bonnie  !!  

FULL  NAME.   bonnie  cecilia  rivers  .

NAME  MEANING.   beautiful  ,  cheerful  (  bonnie   )   ,   blind  to  one’s  beauty  (   cecilia  )  .

NICKNAMES.  bo  ,  bon  ,  bunny  .

PREFERRED  NAME.  bonnie  .

AGE.  twenty  one  .

BIRTHDAY.  february  twentieth .

ZODIAC.  pisces    .

GENDER. cis  female  .

PRONOUNS.  she  and  her  .  .

ORIENTATION.  heterosexual  ,   heteroromantic  .

RELATIONSHIP  STATUS.   single  .

HOMETOWN.   naperville  ,  illinois  .

FAMILY.   douglas  rivers  (  father  )  ,   charlene  rivers  cruz    (  mother  )  ,    beverly  quinn  rivers  (  sister  )  .

HAIR  COLOR.  naturally  a  brunette  but  always  has  blonde  in  it  .

EYE  COLOR.  green  .

DOMINANT  HAND.  right  .

HEIGHT.  five  ft  six  .

TATTOOS.    none  .

PIERCINGS.  ears  ,  had  her  nose  pierced  but  took  it  out  two  years  ago  .

DRUGS  /  ALCOHOL  /  SMOKING.  no  ,  yes  ,  no  .

BACKGROUND  .

riches  to  rags  is  the  story  of  bonnie  rivers  ,  for  the  first  fifteen  years  of  her  life  she  lived  what  the  rich  would  call  comfortably  .    never  worried  that  pretty  little  head  of  hers  when  her  next  meal  would  be  or  if  she’d  be  able  to  shower   .    the  definition  of  privileged  was  her  ,  and  then  in  a  blink  of  an  eye  things  changed  . 

her  father  ,  being  the  big  business  man  he  was  ,  went  bankrupted  .    for  reasons  that  could  not  be  heard  under  the  screaming  of  ‘  do  not  touch  those  ,  do  you  know  how  much  they  cost  ?  ‘  .    

but  terrible  things  come  in  three’s  ,  and  if  losing  everything  you  ever  had  and  having  to  move  wasn’t  bad  ,  your  mother  walking  out  of  your  life  because  she   couldn’t  and  wouldn’t  live  like  this  had  to  top  it  ,  right  ?  well  regardless  ,  a  year  later  charlene  rivers  packed  all  her  stuck  in  the  dead  of  the  night  and  left  her  husband  and  two  kids  behind  .   the  only  form  of  contact  after  that  being  sent  divorce  papers  .   mommy  of  the  year   .

her  dad  did  try  ,  he  truly  did  .  worked  multiple  jobs  but  raising  two  girls  and  losing  everything  weighed  heavy  on  his  heart  .   he  constantly  felt  like  a  failure  ,  as  if  he  could  do  nothing  right  .    and  he  turned  to  cheap  whiskey  to  help  numb  these  feelings  .   

for  three  years  ,  it  felt  like  bonnie  was  not  only  just  surviving  ,  but  raising  her  little  sister  and  keeping  her  eye  on  her  father  .   the  glue  to  her  family  ,  if  anything  happened  to  her  they’d  all  fall  apart  .

CURRENTLY   (  +  personality  )

bonnie  is  currently  putting  herself  through  school  with  the  help  of  stripping  .  her  mornings  consisting  of  classes  ,  and  her  nights  on  the  stage  .  she’s  not  ashamed  ,  but  it’s  not  something  she  announces  .  she  kind  of  moves  in  silence  when  it  comes  to  money  ,  her  bills  are  paid  and  there  is  food  in  her  stomach  and  regardless  it’s  no  ones  business  .

she  houses  her  little  sister  ,  who  is  four  years  younger  then  her   and  has  been  since  the  age  of  nineteen  when  she  first  got  her  apartment  .    

she’s  pleasure  seeking  ,  constantly  on  the  move  because  of  it  .  sometimes  she  just  needs  a  reminder  of  why  she’s  doing  what  she’s  doing  .

boisterous  ,  literally  will  talk  your  ear  off  .    

the  most  irresponsible  responsible  person  you  will  ever  meet  .

a  big  day  dreamer  ,  constantly  comes  up  with  things  in  her  head  that  is  way  too  unrealistic  .    

outgoing  ,  totally  thrives  on  the  social  scene  .  

definitely  is  still  a  bit  boujee  ,   all  of  her  extra  spending  money  is  on  clothes  ,  shoes  ,  and  purses  .  it’s  her  bad  habit  .

finicky  ,   is  very  up  and  down  about  what  she  wants  especially  when  it  comes  to  relationships  .    

WANTED  CONNECTIONS  

if  anyone  else  strips  someone  she’s  close  to  because  of  that  ??  lowkey  want  hustlers  vibes  .  

a best  friend  !!!  im  thinking  a  fiona  and  vee  vibes  ,  like  true  ride  or  dies  always  there  for  you  .

close  friends  in  general  .  she’s  definitely  the  type  to  surround  herself  with  people  as  to  not  feel  so  alone  .

ex  friends  !!!  maybe  they  had  a  big  fall  out  or  maybe  they  just  grew  apart  .

friends  with  benefits  and  ofc  ex  friends  with  benefits  .

something  cute  where  maybe  they’re  neighbors  and  kind  of  rely  on  one  another  ?  or  they  absolutely  hate  each  other  and  do  the  most  to  get  on  one  another’s  nerves  .

ex  boyfriends  of  all  kinds  .  but  i love  angst  and  toxic  ,  dont  @  me  please  .

people  she  knows  because  they’re  always  coming  into  the  club  ?

party  friends  !!!!!

cousins  !  they  can  be  super  close  or  like  it  can  be  a  i  barely  know  you  kind  of  thing  .

a  will  they  wont  they  .

on  and  off  friendship  ?  one  day  their  friends  and  the  next  they  arent  and  then  two  days  later  they  are  .

literally  give  me  anything  asdfgh  ! 

#crawford:intro #tw: mention of alcohol #tw: mention of addiction #this is horrible but i just wanted to get something up #love miss bonnie anyway

[hqkennedy-blog]

*  breathes  ..  i  wish  me  and  introductions  could  be  the  best  of  friends  but  ,  it  seems  like  they  hate  my  guts  and  in  return  i  hate  theirs  asdfj  .  hi  hello  you  pretty  people  ,  im  gi  and  well  ??  i’ve  had  my  eye  on  this  group  for  a  minute  ..  so  my  excitement  level  ?  through  the  roof  .   kennedy  is  a  revamped  ?   ish  ??  muse  who  i  cannot  wait  to  dig  deeper  into  and  develop  .  on  that  note  ?  if  you  want  to  know  a  little  more  about  her  ,  just  keep  on  swimming  ,,,  i  mean  reading  .  and  afterwards  i  demand  you  love  her  and  plot  with  me  ( pretty  please  )  

ʻ   /   let  me  introduce  you  to  a  prized  member  of  our   co-ed  dance  team   ,   kennedy   leavitt .  this   cis  female  scorpio   has  been  a  student  at  our  institution for   six  years  and  is  currently  a  twenty  year  old   sophomore .   through  the  halls ,   she  has  always  reminded  me  of   madison  beer   ,   but  there  is  always  more  than  meets  the  eye ,   like  the  fact  that  she  covered  for  her  best  friend  by  announcing  to  the  cops  that  the  drugs  they  found  in  their  car  did  not  belong  to  them  but  to  her  instead            knowing  her  father  would  be  able  to  make  any  and  all  consequences  disappear  which  he  did  but  followed  by  him  forbidding  her  from  seeing  them  anymore  .  coral  cape  has  made  their  future  just  as  bright  as  their  smile ,   i  assure  you .  ʼ    

   *   p  r  o  s  o  p  o  g  r  a  p  h  y  

trigger  warning  !!!  mention  of  cancer  !!  

stranded  at  the  age  of   six  ,  a  stuffed  elephant  in  hand  and  confusion  lingering  on  skin  .  small  glimpses  of  a  angelic  features  to  ease  the  never  ending  tears  that  swam  in  honeyed  hues  .  too  young  to  understand  the  concept  that  she  had  not  been  stranded  due  to  lack  of  love  nor  a  lack  of  want  but  because  of  the  inability  to  care  for  the  small  child  .  a  clock  that  was  running  out  ,  and  a  vengeful  cancer  that  did  not  care  for  the  butterfly  kisses  or  midnight  snacks  as  they  watched  the  stars  .  a  child  needing  their  mother  meant  nothing  to  such  a  disease  .  

was  put  ,  or  more  so  forced  ,  in  the  care  of  her  father  .  the  man  who  looked  down  at  her  with  guilt  dancing  in  his  hues  and  cold  features  that  made  her  want  to  flinch  .  the  reality  was  ,  olly  leavitt  originally  wanted  nothing  to  do  with  the  life  he  helped  create  .  fell  into  the  cliche  category  of  the  rich  man  sleeping  with  his  twenty  something  assistant            getting  her  pregnant  only  to  try  to  pay  her  to  get  rid  out  of  the  fetus  and  when  that  failed  ?  he  paid  her  to  never  spill  that  it  was  his  .   and   louise  did  ,   she  raised  the  ebullient  baby  for  six  years  until  she  realized  six  years  was  all  she  would  be  able  to  spend  with  her  .  and  then  she  fell  at  the  feet  of   a  selfish  man  she  once  loved  and  begged  him  to  take  their  baby  under  his  care  ,  to  give  her  everything  she  could  not  do  . 

a  public  figure  ,  drenched  in  sovereignty  and  affluence  .   was  in  no  position  to  deny  a  child  of  his  ,  especially  when  that  child  had  a  dead  mother  .  used  it  and  kenny  in  his  advantage  ,  concealing  his  own  guilt  and  projecting  disgust  .  magazine  covers  and  interviews  about  the  tragic  sob  story  ,   kissed  her  cheek  in  front  of  the  cameras  and  spoke  with  such  empathy  when  ears  were  tuned  in  ...  but  in  private  ?  created  distance  and  threw  money  at  her  as  though  there  was  a  number  he  could  hit  to  fill  the  void  she  had  .    

has  ‘  it  all  ‘  ,  so  outsiders  say  .  bat  their  eyes  and  make  comments  about  how  she’s  destined  to  do  great  things  .  lives  in  that  beautiful  and  just  so  expensive  house  ,   and  she  drives  the  2020  lamborghini  ,   and  have  you  seen  her  feed  ?  captivating  smiles  as  she  poses  with  her  best  friends  ,  and  i  heard  she  just  took  a  family  vacation  to   monaco   .    got  that  dress  made  personally  for  her  by  versace  ,  and  doesn’t  she  got  to  that  prestigious  school  ?   the  privilege  of  being  privilege  ,   she  should  shut  up  and  just  be  happy  she  is  where  she  is  .   broken  hearts  heal  ...  and  if  it  doesn’t  ?  eventually  that  cold  feeling  becomes  a  friend  .  

*  r  u  m  i  n  a  t  i  o  n  

laughter  falls  from  her  mouth  like  its  her  own  language  .  ebullience  ,  the  chatter  bug  that  has  the  ability  to   ramble  until  she’s  threatened  (  by  an  older  brother  of  course  )  .  affectionate  ,  has  digits  that  are  constantly  reaching  for  another  hand  to  hold  .  a  habit  of  letting  fingertips  dance  across  bare  skin  ,  or  a  head  that  constantly  needs  a  shoulder  to  lean  on  .  warmth  ,  makes  her  feel  not  so  lonely  .   is  in  her  head  too  much  ,  the  type  of  girl  that  stares  at  the  night  sky  and  wonders  why  the  stars  make  her  feel  so  small  .   inherited  her  fathers  impulsive  ways  and  her  mother’s  trait  to  love  even  when  it  hurts  .  triggers  that  silence  in  her  that  desperately  holds  on  to  people  to  make  her  feel  something  ,  and  when  that’s  not  enough  her  careless  and  adrenaline  seeking  nature  kicks  in  to  cause  chaos              make  her  feel  alive  .   fears  people  leaving  her  just  like  she  see’s  her  father  in  every  flaw  she  has  .  toxic  in  the  way  she  has  the  urge  to  pull  back  every  time  she  gets  too  close  .  uses  gregariousness  to  hide  her  greatest  heart  ache  of  feeling  disposable  .  selfish  in  wanting  to  leave  a  mark  on  everyone  .  dramatic  like  she  should  of  dropped  out  of  college  and  ran  to  broadway  instead  .   loyal  like  she’s  trying  to  make  up  for  every  betrayal  you  have  ever  had  ..  emotional  enough  to  crawl  into  your  lap  (  intoxicated  )  and  cry  about  all  of  her  worries  .  silly  to  the  point  you  can’t  help  but  laugh  before  letting  ,  ‘  what’s  wrong  with  you  ‘  fall  from  your  lips  .   so  captivating  you  want  to  drown  in  her  no  matter  the  consequences  that  follow  .

*  h  e  a  d  c  a  n  o  n  s  -  i  s  h  

has  a  obsession  with  nails  ,  long  acrylic’s  so  pretty  you  could  cry  .  

always  has  her  toes  painted  ,  her  go  to  color  being  white              swears  it  makes  her  feel  more  elegant  . 

did  cheer leading  and  only  settled  on  dance  because  it  felt  most  familiar  to  her  though  she  did  play  soccer  for  three  years  . 

could  eat  waffle  fries  for  the  rest  of  her  life  and  never  complain  .  

has  three  cars  ,  and  a  bit  of  a  obsession  with  them  in  general  .  

eats  pineapple  like  it’s  her  life  support  . 

is  musically  talented  ,  not  just  vocally  but  plays  the  piano  too  .  her  mother  taught  her  . 

has  three  half  siblings  ,  and  she  would  take  a  bullet  for  any  of  them . 

is  close  to  her  step  mom  ,  and  without  her ?  would  of  tried  to  get  removed  from  her  fathers  custody  the  minute  she  was  old  enough  to  do  so  .

has  a  aunt  on  her  mother  side  that  lives  close  by  ,  she  often  spends  time  at  her  place  ..  

*  w  a  n  t  e  d    c  o  n  n  e  c  t  i  o  n  s 

ex  best  friend  ,  the  person  who  her  secret  is  related  to  .  i  assumed  she  would  have  just  cut  them  off  instead  of  telling  them  what’s  really  going  on  ,  but  of  course  we  can  work  that  all  out  .

current  best  friend  ,  the  cristina  to  her  meredith  .  one  of  the  few  who  really  knows  kenny  .  platonic  soulmates  . 

partner  in  crime  ,  they  enable  one  another  ..  there’s  no  way  around  it  but  despite  their  bad  habits  they  have  a  solid  friendship  .  if  one  of  them  needed  bail  money  the  other  would  be  there  (  sometimes  right  beside  them  )

the  friend  group  ,  who  doesn’t  love  a  little  squad  goal  moment  .  they’re  just  cute  and  close  friends  who  are  always  with  each  other . 

childhood  /  family  friend  .

tutor(s)  . 

first  love  . 

on  and  off  friendship  .

toxic  relationship  . 

teammates  . 

friends  with  benefits  (  who  sweaaaar  they  dont  have  feelings  for  each  other  )

ex  friends  with  benefits  . 

close  friends  .

friends  who  are  drifting  apart  .

will  they  wont  they .

unlikely  friends  .

confidant  . 

people  who  she  doesnt  like  and  people  who  dont  like  her .

anything  forbidden  (  friendship  or  relationship  )

honestly  ??  anything  and  everything  please  . 

#capecoral:intro #tw: mention of cancer #let me apologize ahead of time for this MESS