#andy x virgil x deceit
Conversation
Janus: I told Virgil that their ears turn red when they lie.
Andy: Do they?
Janus: No.
Andy: Then why did you tell them that?
Janus: Because I can do this.
Janus: Hey Virgil! Do you love us?
Virgil, with their hands over their ears: No.
#Incorrect quotes#andy x virgil x deceit#Andy Sanders#virgil sanders#janus sanders#andy x virgil x janus
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Pairings: Romantic Romile (Roman x Emile), Romantic Prandy (Andy x Pryce), Romantic Anxtober (October x Virgil), Romantic Intrulosleepceit (Remus x Logan x Remy x Deceit)
Word Count: 2,170 Words
Summary: Flirting with Social Anxiety, kitten updates, the kids talk functions, an elusive cryptid sighting, and the video call feature is figured out.
Warnings: Caps, Food Mention, Insomnia Mention, Depression Mention, Demon Mention, Body Horror Mention, Cursing, Death Mention, Sick Character, Immunocompromised Character, let me know if I should tag anything else.
Note: Bolded and blockquoted are actions in their chatroom, not a message. Italic and blockquoted are transcripts of video calls.
Usernames, a quick translation guide: Andy: Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero), Belladonna: hazelnut, Castor: schrodingersdumbass, Dayd: carniverousroomba, Dice: Dr. Bitch, Emile: Thera-pissed, Eve: wall-e, Halley: aspermylastemail, Janus: SnekBoi, Logan: Momgan, Noah: nope, October: eatpavementido, Orion: birdgeoisie, Patton: Papa Bear, Pollux: satantakemehome, Pryce: SwEeTvErUcA, Remus: Octopussy, Remy: Coffee Bandit, Roman: waaahluigi, Sirius: literalsunshine, Teal: uwu, Thomas: shrexy, Virgil: spipples, Vita: þiccness
A Very Sanders Group Chat: Chapter 12
3:07 PM
shrexy: You know guys, it'd be nice if you quit for a bit.
spipples: We're right next to you, dammit. Just talk to us.
waaahluigi: Guys, he's looking at Thomas.
Dr. Bitch: You know what? I won't even ask.
4:57 PM
Coffee Bandit: I think they're trying to lie again or something.
Octopussy: Not Jan this time.
Momgan: We know, Remus.
Octopussy: Well, if I don't make note of it, who's going to prove that Jan wasn't involved?
Coffee Bandit: He's not wrong, Lo. Every time Thomas lies, Jan is implicated as the cause, even when he's not there.
Momgan: I hate that you aren't wrong.
7:12 PM
Thera-pissed: Sooooo. New boyfriend?
waaahluigi: THOMAS HAS A NEW BOYFRIEND!
spipples: We know, Roman. We're all a part of the same human. We all know this.
waaahluigi: I know but I'm just so happy about it!
spipples: And we all support you, Ro.
10:17 PM
þiccness: I have stolen the other girls, we're going to an underage club and coming back by 2am.
Thera-pissed: Just make sure you check Eve's glucose before you let her eat because she'll forget to check.
þiccness: will be done, Pops.
3:16 PM
shrexy: What ever happened to those kittens, Remus?
Octopussy: oh yeah. never updated anyone but Jan. they're all healthy again. all twenty six. Dice adopted one, it's name is Domino.
Octopussy: and we adopted five. Their names are Morticia, Elvira, Achilles, Patroclus, and Tootsie Pop.
shrexy: Who named the last one?
hazelnut: that would be me
Octopussy: Tootsie Pop is her cat. Morticia and Elvira are Jan's, Achilles and Patroclus are mine.
shrexy: So that's six. That still leaves twenty cats unaccounted for.
spipples: This would be where I come in and tell you I adopted ten of them, isn't it? Because I did I'm constantly swarmed with five month old kittens.
Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): He gave them all dumb names.
spipples: Sir, those are my furry children you're insulting.
Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): Ah yes, my fuzzy nieces and nephews with stupid names.
spipples: How dare you insult Toast, Meatball, Cheddar, Porkchop, Bagel, Bacon, Muffin, Twinkie, Tofu, and Tortilla.
shrexy: You really went with a food theme, huh?
spipples: To be fair, nobody stopped me.
shrexy: I'll be honest, the idea of naming a cat Bagel is hilarious.
spipples: To be fair, Bagel has no braincell so he's perfectly dumb and content in life.
waaahluigi: I also have three cats. Princess, Queen, and Duchess.
shrexy: So did the other seven get adopted?
Coffee Bandit: Yup, mine and Toby's. I have six, he has one. Remington, Remulus, Remy the Second, Rema, and Remingtina.
eatpavementido: Mine is named Pumpkin. I don't know what these guys are on.
8:45 PM
Momgan: Janus, Remus, I'm coming over for date night.
Coffee Bandit: Hold on, I'm omw.
Octopussy: It's poly cuddle pile time!
1:13 AM
hazelnut: So all of my parents are adorable.
hazelnut: polycuddlepile.jpg
hazelnut: I love my parents.
Papa Bear: They're so cute, kiddo! But you should get some sleep.
hazelnut: My function is Dreams I sleep during the day?
Papa Bear: Ah, carry on then, kiddo.
þiccness: Hi, I'm Nightmares.
shrexy: Wait, you kids have functions?
eatpavementido: more like fragments of a function.
satantakemehome: I'm Insomnia, Castor is Depression, Sirius is Insecurity, Halley is Courage, and Orion is Apathy.
wall-e: Me and Noah are the only figments that are also fragments. I act as Responsibility and Noah acts as Empathy.
shrexy: Huh. Never really thought about that but I guess I see it.
shrexy: shadowdemon.jpg
shrexy: angeltheshadowdemon.jpg
shrexy: virgilsnugglingme.jpg
shrexy: Help, I've been taken hostage as a cuddle victim.
eatpavementido: Perish.
9:58 AM
shrexy: virgilisstillhere.jpg
shrexy: Is it legal to move, fellas?
eatpavementido: I'll come help. Damn, my boyfriend's really choosing his human over his boyfriend.
shrexy: I promise I'm not stealing your man.
eatpavementido: Good, I'd punch you if you did.
shrexy: tobynowtrappedbyvirgil.jpg
shrexy: I'm free!
eatpavementido: I love being trapped by my boyfriend.
Thera-pissed: Don't worry, I get trapped by Roman a lot too.
waaahluigi: Hey!
Thera-pissed: Am I lying?
waaahluigi: No but you make it sound like I'm clingy.
Thera-pissed: Yes, but your clinginess is cute.
waaahluigi: Alright, you may continue.
eatpavementido: Ah yes, the triplets are stage 5 clingers. Gotta love it when all three idenntical idiots are touch starved.
SwEeTvErUcA: I will rip out your incisors.
waaahluigi: I will feed you your own teeth.
Octopussy: I will make you spit out your teeth one by one like a PEZ dispenser.
Dr. Bitch: Good to see the triplets getting along.
eatpavementido: You can't kill me! I have the power of my boyfriend and anime on my side!
Dr. Bitch: Did he just call Virgil god?
eatpavementido: Am I wrong? No.
Dr. Bitch: Alright, carry on.
9:14 AM
shrexy: Wow, y'all. Did anyone else realize you could make a chat-wide call?
shrexy has started a video call
shrexy has invited everyone to the video call
waaahluigi has accepted shrexy's invite
SnekBoi has declined shrexy's invite
Octopussy has declined shrexy's invite
Coffee Bandit has declined shrexy's invite
Momgan has accepted shrexy's invite
eatpavementido has accepted shrexy's invite
Papa Bear has accepted shexy's invite
Transcript
"Hey, guys!" - shrexy]
"Hey, Thomas." -eatpavementido
"Is Virgil asleep on you?" -shrexy
"Yes." - eatpavementido
"Aww. Guess we've gotta be quiet." - Papa Bear
"Nah. Legit, Pollux just busted in the room and
yelled that Castor was chasing him and he's still
sleeping." - eatpavementido
"Shit, shit, shit. He's up. I must have moved." - eatpavementido
"Toby, what the fuck? Are you recording me?
I look like a mess. Quit it." - unknown
"It's a video call with the group chat." - eatpavementido
"Turn it off." - unknown
"It's okay, Virgil, you look cute." - Papa Bear
"Gimme that." - unknown
"Make me." - eatpavementido
"Alright." - unknown
eatpavementido has left the video call
shrexy has ended the video call
shrexy: RIP Toby.
Papa Bear: @spipples Kiddo, please don't kill your boyfriend?
spipples: Only a little bit?
Papa Bear: Not even a little bit.
spipples: Suck the fun out of life, why don't you?
eatpavementido: Don't make it sound like I wouldn't let him kill me if he chose.
waaahluigi: Live by the boyfriend. Die by the boyfriend.
eatpavementido: Precisely
shrexy: Anyone gonna make note of the fact that Janus, Remus, and Remy all declined the video call?
Momgan: They're busy. I figured at least one of us from our relationship should join so I actually went to a quieter bar in the imagination,
shrexy: Should I even ask what kind of busy?
Momgan: You can if you want.
shrexy: Though I feel like I'll regret this, what kind of busy?
Momgan: Janus is upstairs sleeping, Bela is practicing her crochet, Remus is grooming Boogeyman and Espresso, and Remy is taking care of his new piercing. I was planning out my week's schedule around theirs so I could visit.
shrexy: Sorry to interrupt you, bud.
Momgan: No, it's fine. I needed a break anyway.
waaahluigi: Was Deceit sleeping all day yesterday too?
Momgan: What are you implying?
waaahluigi: That he's avoiding me.
Momgan: Alright, you thickheaded, self-deluded bastard. I get that you two aren't getting along. I don't care, quite frankly. Hate each other's guts for all I care. You two having problems with one another isn't my problem. But Janus isn't avoiding you, he's finally receptive to the second part of his treatments and he's finally getting better.
SnekBoi: Logan, don't fight my fights.
Momgan: Sorry, sweetheart. I'm on my way back, I'll come up to you first and we can talk it over.
SnekBoi: It's okay.
SnekBoi: And you @waaahluigi, I'm sorry. Okay? I'm sorry that I lashed out at you and I'm sorry I compared you to Remus, it was wrong of me and you didn't deserve that.
waaahluigi: Oh look, everyone. After three months he finally apologizes!
SnekBoi: I haven't made effort to contact you in the last three months because I didn't contact anyone in the last three months other than Dice and a few nurses. I willingly gave my phone to hospital lock up so I could be just a little less stressed while going through the hardest parts of my treatment for the third time in six months and so that maybe, just maybe, I could get through the consolidation and I finally did it. So I'm sorry my apology to you is so late, oh great one, but I was a bit busy getting medically cleared with remission so I could finally go home.
waaahluigi: oh
SnekBoi: But, since I'm taking the moral high ground, you don't need to apologize and you don't need to feel bad about assuming things. I disappeared and I never talked it out with you because my admission was so sudden and the recommendation of detachment was a spur of the moment decision that only benefited me. I'm finally home and I actually was sleeping all of yesterday. I'm not about to get in fights right now because I'm too happy to be in my own bed again and getting to hold my own daughter and boyfriends again.
waaahluigi: I'm still sorry.
SnekBoi: Accepted.
spipples: Does this mean I have to stop being bitter about you two not getting along?
SnekBoi: No, but it would be appreciated.
spipples: Aight, bet. I'll forcefully make us three best friends.
shrexy: aren't all three of you mothers?
SnekBoi: Alright, this. I never really realized this. And, now that it's been brought to my attention, the first order of business is stealing you two, Bela, and your kids and going to the new tea place in Laurel for late Mother's day. I've been waiting to go since Sharon got herself fired from there and they have the best ginger and honey tea.
waaahluigi: Sharon?
SnekBoi: Yeah, she makes fun of me for being a teen mother every time I see her.
Octopussy: I've punched her once. didn't stop her.
waaahluigi: I know, she did that to me too. I told her she shouldn't say rude things to someone who could and would unmake her.
spipples: Same here except she made fun of me the whole time I was pregnant with the triplets until I just straight up punched her.
shrexy: I guess being decked by a heavily pregnant 15 year old sets you off of making fun of them, huh?
spipples: Heavily pregnant 15 year old with the ability to conjure shadows.
shrexy: You scare me. Keep those shadows to yourself.
SnekBoi: I may need to wear a mask and book a table beforehand to make sure the room is private until I'm in the complete clear with the chemo still making my immune system absolute shit.
waaahluigi: Plus the fact that our kids make a solid soccer team so we'll need a bit of a biggger table.
SnekBoi: Yeah, that too.
spipples: Thanks for remembering my soccer team, guys.
SnekBoi: You're very welcome.
spipples: That was sarcastic.
SnekBoi: I know, I felt it.
spipples: You're insufferable, I love it.
12:45 PM
spipples: Hey, @SnekBoi, you guttertrash bitch, do you have a migraine yea or nay?
SnekBoi: Kind of. I'm working off one but I took my meds so it should be gone soon enough.
spipples: Noted, no doorbell or knocking.
SnekBoi: Wait, what??
spipples: Answer your fucking door then and find out.
SnekBoi: Gremlin.
1:05 PM
waaahluigi: So what'd he do?
SnekBoi: Brought over lunch for me since all my boyfriends are working and Bela is at school.
spipples: He cried.
SnekBoi: Shut up or I will end you.
Octopussy: Anything good?
spipples: Yes, I have the spare containers for you in the fridge when you come home and, yes, it's edible for you too if that's what you're asking.
Octopussy: ooooh, what is it?
spipples: spaghetti squash with tomato sauce, veggie curry, and ham and egg roll ups. There's also a few casseroles in disposable pans in the freezer that you can heat up in 45 minutes each.
Octopussy: I love you.
SnekBoi: be real with him, V, you brought over like two weeks of casseroles. You're just lucky we have a really big freezer.
spipples: Yeah, a really big, empty freezer.
Octopussy: I was gonna go shopping literally in two days on Wednesday when I'm off.
SnekBoi: loaded cauliflower, zucchini au gratin, loaded brussels sprouts, rice cheese and zucchini, green bean, eggplant lasagna, chicken cordon bleu, chicken broccoli cheese, cabbage rolls, chicken & mushroom, tofu caprese, crack chicken, brown rice cheese and tomatoes, and chicken bacon thyme.
Octopussy: hey Virge
spipples: yeah?
Octopussy: love ya
spipples: Thank you. I'm also babysitting your boyfriend until someone comes home because this weak bastard bruised his wrist and almost fell over opening the front door.
SnekBoi: I'm not a baby but I won't make you leave because I'm tired and I don't want Boogey to have to get me things or help me around.
Octopussy: stubborn bastard. love you. thanks V.
spipples: No problem.
Taglist: @glaxyjellyfish @chronophobica @fear-ze-queer @imma-potatoo
#sanders sides#sympathetic deceit#immunocompromised deceit#immunocompromised janus#thomas sanders#virgil sanders#roman sanders#critic sanders#dice sanders#remy sanders#remus sanders#logan sanders#emile sanders#andy sanders#october sanders#toby sanders#patton sanders#snoweywrites#a very sanders group chat#tw caps#tw food mention#tw insomnia mention#tw depression mention#tw demon mention#tw body horror mention#tw cursing#tw death mention#finally updating this story#after nine months
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Some random fluff things
I should really finish my homework and go to bed somewhat earlier than I usually do, I have a final plus an FRQ tomorrow one after the other
But I mean
Homework and sleep got nothing on fluff headcanon stuff for ships so here's a disorganized mess of fluff. It's also only for two ships so-
Roman x Emile x Logan (Rolomile)
Plus Patton, Damien(Deceit), and Virgil as their kiddos, and a side Rem^2!
Logan's originally a single dad to a boy named Patton, and Emile and Roman are already married with their two sons Damien and Virgil. They meet Logan when they were called in one day cause Virgil got into a fight at school defending his friend Andy, and once they were home and reassured Virgil they weren't mad Roman and Emile had a long and private discussion about this teacher cause he was so cute and calm and captured their hearts almost immediately
So they ask Virgil about him(Virgil's like, 11 at this point btw) and Vee ain't an idiot, he's the best crush finder out of all the sixth graders, and immediately calls them out and just tell his dads "if you both like him ask him out!"
And so they do, and it ends up going very well! The three go out for coffee, letting the boys stay at Logan's friend's house(Thomas's house). They run into Remus and his boyfriend Remy who somehow knew Logan and they all just sorta hang out
Logan's very confused about how these two married men that obviously love each other so much and are happy with where there family is find him interesting, and he's a bit unsure when it comes to entering a romantic relationship with them. More long talks ensue
Patton also encourages his Papa to date Roman and Emile, the five year old claiming "he'd love to have three papas!" and how excited he'd be if there was more love to go around. As well as excitement over seeing Virgil and Damien more often
Logan does eventually get romantically involved with them and lemme tell you, Roman and Emile used to pride themselves on not ever getting flustered
That pride was thrown out the damn window, Logan makes them flustered with his light laugh and the way he can go on and on about a subject and turn the most boring thing into the most interesting
Logan's also really cuddly and touchy, often playing with their hands or hair, hugging them from behind or placing kisses all over their faces
He nearly gave Emile a heart attack when Emile stumbled in on Logan singing Virgil, Dee, and Patton a lullaby
Roman had originally proposed to Emile. Emile proposes to Logan this time, making sure it's absolutely perfect for their nerd
They all take turns as to who sleeps in the middle each night
Logan reads to them until they fall asleep if they're having a rough day
Emile and Logan talk a lot about psychology and mental health. Damien was really excited to continue learning about that kinda thing, especially cause once he gets older his psychology and health teacher isn't all that great
Roman and Logan are both very competitive and have created the following games : who could fluster Em the most, which one could put the boys to sleep faster(Emile triumphed without even playing), who knew the most musicals or films in x genre, first to clean the most dishes, the best baker(Patton and Dee crushed them with this, and now neither Roman or Logan is allowed to ever cook unless Emile is supervising), and who will last longer for a no blushing game when Emile rambled adorably about whatever new thing he found super interesting
Oh yeah and Roman's a painter cause I said so and he'll often make paintings of his boyfriends. There's a lot of paintings of Logan and Emile out somewhere with a pretty backdrop.
Remus is a photographer in this and has definitely taken many photos of his brother and his husbands whenever asked cause it means he can bring Remy to a really nice date spot too
Dukexiety
Childhood best friends all the way
Remus is very protective over Virgil, and will fight anyone and anything that hurts Virgil
Virgil is very clingy in the mornings, not that Remus is complaining when Virgil's holding him tightly and refusing to let him out of bed
They write together, it was initially a thing Remus did by himself as a suggestion from Logan and then Virgil tried it to help relax and it worked. They've done multiple collaborative short stories, and they both write a Logicality fic together on a shared account on Tumblr
Remus often asks Virgil if he's doing alright whenever things start to get heated, constantly checking if what they were doing was fine and reminding Virgil it was okay to say no. Virgil really appreciates this
Sometimes they need to take breaks so they have a thing where they spend the day away from one another and do their own thing, they end up with some wild stories in the end
Remus is actually a really good cook, especially when it comes to Virgil's favorite things. He really loves making homemade pizza for them
Remus will hum Virgil to sleep
The others are very surprised when they find out they're dating
And nearly gave heart attacks once they find out that Virgil and Remus aren't actually dating, but are engaged
Virgil tells Remus he loves him every single day, any chance he gets. But he's always sure to say it before they go to sleep and just after waking up
#someone suggested rolomile for a ship name so imma just go with that#rolomile#romantic rolomile#romantic dukexiety#dukexiety#deceit mention#sympathetic remus#sympathetic deceit#sympathetic virgil#sympathetic dark sides#sympathetic logan#sympathetic emile#sympathetic remy#virgil x remus#roman x emile x logan#roman sanders#remus sanders#virgil sanders#dr emile picani#emile picani#logan sanders#im definitely gonna expand on these in the future#night yall!!!
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>-< ok im nervous to do dis but what is your opinion on Remy x Emilie, Roman x Virgil, Deceit x Remus, and Logan x Patton?
Remy x Emilie: It's a nice ship, although I prefer shipping Andy (the shorts anxiety) with Remy.
Roman x Virgil: Meh, I don't love it. But it's okay.
Deceit x Remus: Very cute, I have written about it and will in the future.
Logan x Patton: Kinda the same as Roman x Virgil. Kinda meh, cause I see it everywhere. It's cute though, in a puppy love kinda way.
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Conversation
*Janus is casually searching around the room*
Virgil: Hey Janus, what’re you looking for?
Janus: My will to live.
*Andy walks into the room*
Janus: Oh, there it is.
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Conversation
Janus: I didn't drink that much last night.
Virgil: You were flirting with Andy.
Janus: So what? They're my partner.
Virgil: You asked if they were single.
Virgil: And then you cried when they said they weren't.
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Deceit: *Bleps*
Andy: Stop that.
Deceit: *Raises his brow and keeps blepping*
Andy: Stop being so adorable!
Deceit: *Snickers*
Andy: Virgil! Deceit won’t stop being adorable!
Virgil: *Sarcastically* Oh no, such a tragedy. *Smirks*
Deceit: *Laughs*
#Andy x Virgil x Deceit#anxceit#deceit sanders#sympathetic deceit#Virgil Sanders#Andy sanders#zylo writes stuff
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Andy: *Hugs Deceit* Good snake.
Deceit: *Clings* Warm boyfriend~
Virgil: *Looks over* ??? *Shrugs and hugs both of them*
Deceit: !!! TWO warm boyfriends. *Clings to Virgil as well*
#Anxceit#Andy x Virgil x Deceit#Andy Sanders#Deceit Sanders#Virgil Sanders#Sympathetic deceit#zylo writes stuff#sometimes ya just need some fluffy ot3 stuff
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Remy: How did you get two boyfriends?
Andy: *Has Virgil and Janus hugging him* I'm not entirely sure but I ain't complaining.
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Andy: 😴
Janus: The target has been spotted. On three-
Virgil: One.
Janus: Two.
Both: Three!
Andy: ?! *Bolts awake only to be tackled by both sides*
Janus: Mission accomplished. *Makes himself comfortable against Andy*
Virgil: *Copies him* That went a lot better than I thought it would.
Andy: *Sighs* You could have just done that normally, you know.
Virgil: *Shrugs* Janus talked me into it.
Janus: *Proud smirk*
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One of my favorite HCs for Andy x Virgil x Deceit is that when they first meet, Andy takes one look at them and is just “ah yes, must protect”.
#Andy x Virgil x Deceit#Andy Sanders#Virgil Sanders#Deceit Sanders#anxceit#sanders sides#sanders shorts
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Deceit: I don’t have a type.
Remy: *Has secretly looked through Deceit’s phone and found a bunch of pictures of Virgil and Andy* Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.
Deceit: ???
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Deceit: *Uses his left arms to pick up Virgil* Mine~
Virgil: *Startled hiss*
Deceit: *Uses his other arms to pick up Andy* Also mine~
Andy: *Just raises an eyebrow*
Deceit: My wonderful emos~ *Walks away*
#Andy x Virgil x Deceit#Andy Sanders#Anxceit#Sympathetic Deceit#Deceit Sanders#Virgil Sanders#zylo writes stuff
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Virgil: >:3c *Takes Deceit’s hat*
Deceit: *Flails his arms like a cartoon character* No touching my hat, you stupid sexy emo!
Virgil: o.o ...Uh...thank you...? *Holds out the hat*
Deceit: !!! *Stops flailing and hugs the hat to himself*
[Later]
Deceit: *Places his hat on Andy*
Andy: Hmm?
Deceit: *Nods thoughtfully* It looks good on you.
Virgil: *From the stairs* What the hell, he’s allowed to touch that hat?!
Deceit: *Smirks* Yes.
Andy: *Sighs as they start arguing* I love them but they fight over the stupidest damn things sometimes.
#Sympathetic deceit#deceit sanders#Virgil sanders#Andy sanders#andy x virgil x deceit#anxceit#zylo writes stuff
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Tales AU - Wine night with Andy, Virgil, and Dee except Dee’s the only one who actually has wine. The other two refuse to drink something other than their precious Gatorade out of the glasses.
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What’s your favorite Janus ship?
Pairing: Andy x Janus
Polyam: Andy x Virgil x Janus
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