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exvangelicalrage · 11 months

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Nobody Practices What They Preach

6/8/23

A couple of years after my Exit, I remember having a brief conversation with my mom where I mentioned my disappointment at the behavior of some local pastor who was caught up in a scandal and had to leave their church. I mentioned that christians always talk about how good and well-behaved and holy they are, but then you find out it was all a lie.

My mom replied, in a very patient and tolerant tone of voice, "christians sin too. We are human, just like everybody else."

And that was it. As if that answer was enough: "christians sin too."

But the problem is, christians don't talk like they're "just people." They say they've been “chosen by god.” They say they're right. They say they Know, with a capital K, what is right and wrong.

"In the world but not of it," they proclaim, which is just code for "We're better than you. We are heaven bound. Whatever happens here on earth is meaningless in the grand scheme of eternity. But you non-christians? You are sinful. Earthly. Bound for hell. And we don't associate with the hell bound."

They've drawn a line in the sand. Us vs them. Me vs you.

It's worse when you look at christian leadership. I watched the Hulu documentary about Jerry Falwell Jr. the other day, and the one about Hillsong the weekend before that. I was a little disappointed when I finished. I thought these tell-alls were going to be shocking. Eye-opening. Mind-blowing.

But the reveals were not particularly surprising.

Doesn't everyone know pastors abuse children? And have sexual dalliances outside their marriage? And are willing to engage in all sorts of unethical behaviors to "further the will of god," whatever they decide that to mean?

I mean, it's great to have proof. And yes, please, hold predators and criminals accountable, destroy their reputations and lives, and take away the power they wield. Whether or not they're christian. I'm a fan of all that.

But I also know that when you eliminate one predator, there will always be another to take their place.

I was around 8 years old when the pastor of my childhood church got booted for having an affair. I remember it distinctly.

"What is happening?" I asked my mom. Everyone at church was in a hubbub that morning.

"Pastor Hall got caught holding hands with a lady who wasn't his wife," my mom told me.

I didn't see why that was such a big deal at the time, of course. Holding hands wasn't that bad, was it? But apparently this time, it had been catastrophic. It divided the church. People left. We left.

I imagined Pastor Hall at a coffee shop, innocently holding hands with some kind woman while eating a snack. I spent many years quite confused about the whole thing. I was much older before I realized what had actually happened.

Then, the youth pastor in the same church got booted for getting a divorce. Then a pastor at nearby church got kicked for having "a big ego" which most certainly was a cover story for something else. This is all in a 10-mile radius in a rural part of upstate New York. At churches I attended in some capacity. That my friends went to.

Naturally, I grew up intensely distrustful of pastors, especially male pastors, and anyone in a leadership position in church. Not because I personally experienced any specific abuse, but because I knew that any of them could be a snake.

They even preached it! "A wolf in sheep's clothing" could be anywhere. Anyone. Even one of them.

After all, "christians sin too."

This particular idea sparks a very specific rage in me. "christians sin too," isn't just some one-off thing my mom said. According to most protestant ideologies, it's a foundational component. Everybody is a sinner. But! jesus' blood covers all sins. If you sin, even after being born again, all you have to do is repent and you will be forgiven. You should strive for perfection, of course, but if you don't attain it, no worries. Repentance to the rescue! Even the catholics have a framework for it: confess and do penance. Then some magic happens... and you're cleansed!

It's a free pass to be a hypocrite.

You can a.) become a christian, b.) not follow christianity at all, and c.) still get to heaven by merely repenting!

Even in the last moments of your life, if you repent with your very last breath... saved!

No accountability necessary. No amends necessary. Doesn't matter how much harm you've caused to other people. Doesn't matter if you've murdered or raped or exploited people. It doesn't matter the nature, frequency, or intensity of the crimes you've committed.

There's a single, easy out: simply ask god for forgiveness.

Even Hitler could be in heaven if he repented before he died. Even genocide is covered by the blood of jesus.

This basic, foundational element of the christian ideology turns out to be a convenient loophole not only for committing grievous offenses against other people, but for consolidating and maintaining power and money as well.

How else would a guy like trump get the support of evangelical christians? He's one of the least christian-behaving people on the fucking planet! He's had too many wives, has sex scandals galore, committed pretty much every sin in the book, is a jackass of epic proportions—and not to mention, you know what the bible says about rich guys? Easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle than for a rich guy to get to heaven.

But when you're christian, it's easy to overlook that stuff. You know why? Because you don't have to believe that he's a good guy. You don't have to believe that he's never fucked up. You don't have to believe that he's holy, moral, or the epitome of a righteous man.

All you have to believe is that he has repented. That's it.

And if he messes up again? Easy. He just has to repent again. He's sorry for harassing women. He's sorry for mocking disabled people. He's sorry for stealing classified documents, trying to subvert democracy, and inciting an insurrection. After all, god forgives everybody, you know. No exceptions.

Now imagine you're on the board of directors at a megachurch. You discover that one of your leaders had committed [insert grievous sin here]. Does he express repentance? Maybe even shed a few tears? Then you're golden. As god forgave him, so can you. You pray for him, instruct him not to fuck up again, and sweep the scandal under the rug, everyone outside this small group none the wiser.

Because, as you know, "christians sin too. They're only human, after all."

The thing is, nobody practices what they preach perfectly. It doesn't matter if we're talking about christians or buddhists, social justice warriors or school administrators. There's a reason parents and teachers like to toss around the aphorism, "Do what I say, not what I do." Because they know they're never going to behave perfectly in line with whatever ideology they espouse.

And that's okay. We are all human. We're complex. Nuanced. And there are a million variables that impact our behavior—it's rarely as simple as a black and white, right/wrong choice. Sometimes it's impossible to know what the right choice is. Sometimes mental illness, trauma, society, cultural norms, confusion, brainwashing, and who knows what else influence us to make spur of the moment decisions that are harmful and go against what we profess to believe. Sometimes, it's as simple as our actions had a different outcome than intended.

Ultimately, being a "good person" is not about being perfect.

It's about taking responsibility for our choices. That's it.

And the christian ideology conveniently removes that. They don't have to take responsibility, because they've been cleansed—freed from sin!—by the blood of christ! hallelujah! (/sarcasm). All they have to do is repent. Quietly. In private.

Redemption Unlocked.

What about the people they've harmed? you might wonder. Like me?

Well, there's a convenient answer for victims too: Repent of your wicked ways, and jesus will lift your burden from you! He will heal your trauma (caused at the hand of another one of his followers, of course)! Fix your problems! And if he doesn't? Clearly you didn't repent good enough. It's your fault. When you're holy enough, god will bless you.

And the circle goes round. The abusers, manipulators, and predators harm and repent, harm and repent, confident they'll end up at the pearly gates when they die. They don't give a shit about their victims, because they know all the victim has to do is pray, and whatever pain or damage they experienced will be lifted, healed, repaired by the all loving, all knowing god who watches from on high.

Nobody practices what they preach. Especially christians.

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acehexual · 2 years

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God I hate Southern Christians sometimes.

#antichristianity #anti christianity #religion #atheism #theology #catholicism #christianity #secularism

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derelsassischmetalthur · 1 year

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🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 . . . @eternalmajestyofficial 🔥 @drakkar_productions 🔥 @domino_black_metal_cat 🖤 🐱 . . . #eternalmajesty #drakkar #darkkarproductions #drakkar666 #metal #fromwartodarkness #blackmetal #deathmetal #frenchblackmetal #rawblackmetal #trueblackmetal #trveblackmetal #death #antichristianity #hate #darkness #metalheadsofinstagram #metalhead #metalheads #instametal #cat #blackmetalcat #cdcollector #cdcollection #metalcollector #metalcollection #musiccollection #musiccollector #recordcollector #recordcollection (à Strasbourg, France) https://www.instagram.com/p/CpPsVuGIufS/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

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whereserpentswalk · 2 months

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I once heard a gay Christian tell me my anti-Christian posts in queer tags made them feel like a Jewish Nazi. Which is interesting because that's exactly how I want queer Christians to feel, all the time.

There should be no place within the queer community where they feel comfortable or safe openly pushing a pseudo-religion that has done nothing but victimized and oppress us. They should be treated just like queer conservatives and queer capitalists, the fact that the bigoted belief system they're part of isn't secular shouldn't matter.

Liberation movements have become so obsessed with marketability that they've forgotten what almost every liberator in the past understood: that the priest was as much our oppressor as the business owner and the noblemen.

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owls-hive · 2 years

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"Jesus died for you 🥺"

No, he didn't. But you know who died in his name? Thousands of innocent women.

#hows that for a wake up call #luciferian #theistic luciferianism #witchcraft #pagan #witchblr #norse paganism #paganism #lucifer #ave luciferi #satanist #ave satanas #theistic satanism #antichristian

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satansluckycigarette · 7 months

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Jesus keeps coming back. He won’t stop. We now have an elite squad of mercenaries whose job it is to put him down.

#writing prompts #prompt #joke #dark humor #blasphemy #exchristian #antichristian

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rockermazy · 1 month

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He IS RISEN! The Tomb is EMPTY!

#Fortnite #fortnite battle royale #midas fortnite #King Midas #antichristian #athiest humor

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mxadrian779 · 11 months

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Happy Pride Month to God's beautiful rainbow children ♥

#pride #PR!DE #jesus #christian #catholic #pride month #lgbt #lgbtqia #queerphobia is antichristian #mxadrian779 #catdaddy779 #shewhowalkswiththee

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shitpostsupernova · 2 years

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#anti christianity #exchristian #ex christian #anti christian #anti religion #antichristian #exmo

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daemonicdasein · 1 month

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‘Oh my Father, Lord of Silence, Supreme God of Desolation, though mankind reviles yet aches to embrace, strengthen my purpose to save the world from a second ordeal of Jesus Christ and his grubby mundane creed. Two thousand years have been enough. Show man instead the raptures of Thy kingdom. Infuse in him the grandeur of melancholy, the divinity of loneliness, the purity of evil, the paradise of pain. What perverted imagination has fed man the lie that Hell festers in the bowels of the Earth? There is only one Hell, the leaden monotony of human existence. There is only one Heaven, the ecstasy of my Father's kingdom.’

‘Nazarene, charlatan, what can you offer humanity? Since the hour you vomited forth from the gaping wound of a woman, you've done nothing but drown man's soaring desires in a deluge of sanctimonious morality. You've inflamed the pubertal mind of youth with your repellent dogma of original sin. And now you absolve in denying them the ultimate joy beyond death by destroying me? But you will fail, Nazarene, as you have always failed. We were both created in man's image, but while you were born of an impotent God, I was conceived of a jackal. Born of Satan, the desolate one, the nail. Your pain on the cross was but a splinter compared to the agony of my father. Cast out of heaven, the fallen angel, banished, reviled. I will drive deeper the thorns into your rancid carcass, you profaner of vices. Cursed Nazarene. Satan, I will avenge thy torment, by destroying the Christ forever.’

— Damien Thorn (portrayed by Sam Neil), Omen III: The Final Conflict (1981), directed by Graham Baker; written by Andrew Birkin.

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blackaltarapparel · 1 year

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Holiday Vibes. 🤘🏽

TAG SOMEONE BELOW! ⬇️

WE SHIP WORLDWIDE! 🌚

⬇️

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exvangelicalrage · 11 months

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Sin Is Fake

6/5/23

I realized something this week. Which is that I don't believe in sin. Obviously, I don't believe in a lot of things, including god, christianity, and literally anything, haha, but I realized this week that I'd been taking the idea of "sin" as a given.

The idea of sin has been a constant in my life since my birth; only a few weeks after we came home from the hospital, my parents had me "dedicated" in front of the church congregation, which is the protestant alternative to the catholic baby baptisms. Instead of saving your soul, however, it's merely a commitment by christian parents to "raise their child in the way he should go" or whatever. And in this case, that meant raising their child to believe they were inherently sinful and needed to be saved by jesus in order to go to heaven.

I've long determined that people are not inherently sinful; that babies are not evil from the moment they are beget; that children do not need to plead forgiveness for imagined wrongs.

But the idea that perhaps sin simply... doesn't exist at all? That is new.

When I was five, I kneeled next to my bed on the pink throw rug my great grandmother had given me, clasped my hands together, and said, "Dear jesus, please come into my heart and forgive me." As I said the words, there was a deep sense of "this is what I'm supposed to do in order to get to heaven." I hadn't quite put together the "I'm sinful and need to be forgiven" part, despite the emphasis on that during Sunday school and vacation bible school, but I knew the words and I said them and I meant them.

But as I grew, it didn't take me long to fully understand what "sin" was.

Sin was whining about chores. Sin was arguing with my brothers. Sin was being obstreperous. Sin was reading instead of cleaning my room. Sin was talking back to my parents. Sin was watching other kids get picked on in school and doing nothing. Sin was not wanting to do my homework. Sin was getting bad grades. Sin was not listening to the teacher. Sin was watching movies. And listening to secular music. And reading books with swear words in them.

Sin was doing anything that upset my parents for any reason.

Sin was lack of total perfection.

Sin was making god mad.

I asked for forgiveness regularly. As a 7 year old. As a 10 year old. As a 12 year old. I knew my soul was irreparably blackened, and jesus was the only one who could cleanse me and guarantee my way into heaven.

When I reached my teenage years, I continued to pray for forgiveness, but I tacked on an extra little request at the end of my prayers: "Please forgive me, and also, if you notice me doing something wrong, could you just let me know?"

"If I'm doing something and don't realize it's a sin, could you please point it out to me?"

"I'm not entirely sure quite what I'm doing wrong, but I know it must be something, so please forgive me even for stuff I don't realize is wrong."

It's a pretty heavy weight, to walk around thinking that you're perpetually committing grievous offenses but have no idea what they are. To believe that god is incessantly watching every movement, every choice, and every thought, and judging you accordingly. Especially as a child. And sure, the pastors said "his blood covers it all" but what does that even mean? And if his blood covers "it all" why couldn't we just be regular people? Why did we have to focus on being as perfect as possible?

The thing is, though, the existence of sin is necessary to christianity. If humans weren't inherently "sinful" then what would the point of christianity be? Because if we weren't inherently sinful, nothing would be preventing us from accessing heaven. We wouldn't need jesus, we wouldn't need the bible, and most of all, we wouldn't need the church.

Sin, at least in a christian context, is a direct and willful violation of god's will. But in order for it to be real, a.) god has to exist, and b.) we have to be able to determine what his will is—irrefutably. But since god (if he exists) hasn't provided a clear-cut directive... how can we possibly ensure that we aren't violating god's will? And if we can't know his will, we can't violate it on purpose.

Hence, sin is fake.

But if pastors, leaders, humans make clear-cut statements that say, "This is wrong and I know because god told me so," then they can claim that your violation of their commandments is sin, and in doing so, they strip access to heaven from you.

The idea of sin allows humans to control other humans. Even humans who don't believe in their ideology.

But if sin doesn't exist in the first place? That hill they're standing on is nothing but air.

To be clear, I think mistakes are real. I think we can do things that we wish we hadn't. I think we can cause harm. We can do things that upset or cause pain or discomfort toward other people, ourselves, or the world around us.

But sin? Nah.

I think I still carry this weight, even though I left christianity over a decade ago.

It's clearest for me in this subconscious pressure that suggests I'm "living a sinful lifestyle," despite the fact that even according to christian standards, my "lifestyle," as it were, is pretty innocuous. I'm straight & hetero, married and monogomous, donate and volunteer to causes, mind my own business most of the time. But I do swear. And read romance novels (with sex scenes *gasp*). And I'm not christian. Which all equals "sinful lifestyle" in my subconscious, I guess.

But there's a lot of freedom in being able to look an action in the face and say "What harm does this cause?" If the answer is "It causes no harm," I can move on with my life. And if the answer is "It causes this specific harm," then I can remediate to the best of my ability.

Litter? I can donate to an environmental organization or pick up more trash than I dropped.

Give voice to my internal biases, even unintentionally? Apologize immediately and truthfully. Or donate to an anti-racist/feminist/trans-inclusionary/disability activist organization if an apology isn't possible. Or all of the above!

Steal something? Give it back. Pay for it. Go to jail. Whatever. Make amends.

There is freedom in accountability. There is freedom in taking responsibility for my misdeeds. I don't need jesus or christianity to "save" me. All I need to do is own up to my behaviors, decisions, and choices, and the consequences therein.

I can make amends. All by myself. No penance, priest, or prayer necessary.

If everyone did this, instead of just "praying for forgiveness," I think the world would be a lot less shitty place.

-----

A not-exactly side note:

If I'm being honest, I think this whole blog is partially about me trying to make amends in a way. It's also therapy through writing, an exploration of my feelings, and a process to think through some of the concepts and ideas that still nag at me. But I could do all of that without sharing it online.

The one thing I feel more guilty about than anything in my life, was the evangelism I did as a teenager. I talked down to other people. Tried to convince them they were evil. I built walls around myself, and judged everyone else as either "saved" or "unsaved." I roped people in, with music and a pretty smile and the threat of hell.

I understand that I was still a child. And that the religion I wielded was placed into my hands by adults. That it's not entirely my fault. I know I was trying to do what was right. But I also feel strongly that I caused harm to those around me. Harm I regret to this day.

I made it out. But not without casualties.

It's a strange type of survivor's guilt.

So I'm hoping that writing out & sharing my experiences, feelings, and pain will maybe help somebody somewhere. I want to do something good that directly counteracts the harm I caused then. Maybe I can support someone leaving the church now, validate someone who is questioning, or offer logic, reason, and experience to help someone see the door.

Maybe it'll help, maybe not. But it feels like the right thing to do.

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absurdnihilisticgurobech · 10 months

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when you grow up to have religious trauma

#meme #religous trauma #religion meme #antichristian #antichristian meme

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derelsassischmetalthur · 1 year

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🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 . . . @ad_omega_666 🔥 @noktvrnal_666 🔥 @drakkar_productions 🔥 @domino_black_metal_cat 🖤 🐱 . . . #adomega #aphelicascent #drakkar #darkkarproductions #drakkar666 #metal #atmosphericblackmetal #blackmetal #avantgardeblackmetal #dissonantblackmetal #dissonant #satanism #antichristianity #misanthropy #metalheadsofinstagram #metalhead #metalheads #instametal #cat #blackmetalcat #cdcollector #cdcollection #metalcollector #metalcollection #musiccollection #musiccollector #recordcollector #recordcollection #cdjunkie #cdporn (à Strasbourg, France) https://www.instagram.com/p/CpKk-c_IH5W/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

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hadit93 · 2 months

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Most of the initiation methods I've come across as an intermediate practitioner mostly include rejecting Christianity or some other versions of that. But if someone who's not a Christian, like a Hindu, or Buddhist, would these initiations work for them?

Also, any good self initiation methods you would suggest?

I don't think they would have the same effect, no. I also don't believe this to be a 'norm' in initiation rituals.

Initiation is about passing on access to a current represented by a specific group. In the AA for example this is the 93 current or Thelemic current, the energies of new aeon and the HGA of the aspirant themselves which is the interface of the candidate that steps in as the representative of the God head. There is no antichristian elements in that ritual and it is more Graeco-Egyptian in its format.

The OTO initiation rituals do have some elements subverting christianity and traditional freemasonry, but this is because the majority of people who were in OTO at the time of Crowley would have been familiar with Christianity and freemasonry. It is therefore a mechanism to shock and release which has a magical effect. There is power in subverting norms, doing things differently, and some practitioners tap into this. For example in trad witchcraft there are rites in which one walks backwards anticlockwise around a church saying the lords prayer backwards. This raises power because it is subverting the norm, there is power in heresy, but you need to feel heretical whilst doing it!

The Golden Dawn rituals are also not about subverting Christianity, nor is Wicca. In fact the apostolic succession of Bishops within Christianity can be seen as an initiation as it is a passing down of power stemming back to St Peter, they are even consecrated with oil.

I don't believe you can self initiate. I believe it has to be done either by interaction and passing on a current by a person who has had the same done to them, or it is performed by the spirits themselves. I don't believe you can simply initiate yourself into something. This does not mean you cannot be initiated through working with the spirits, simply that it takes time and is not something that happens overnight.

Most initiations, early ones anyway, are about cleansing a candidate making them a vessel for spiritual force. In the rituals involving rejecting christianity this is more about releasing themselves from shackles they have experienced as a result of the abuses and soul smothering nature of the church. It is meant to cleanse some of that shame and negativity holding a person back. If a person does not have these feelings, then such a ritual will not have the same effect on them.

#initiation #initiation rituals #antichristian #rejection of religion

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vixvaporub · 2 years

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I find it so funny that Christians are so scared of education... like if your religion was the truth then the educated would be your ally and not your enemy

#i can say a lot more on this #but ill leave it at this for now #antichristian #vixpost

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