#anyway ty for reading my vents

[thewolveswolf]

here’s a quick recap of the last few days, bc idk whether to laugh or cry

cw & tw for mentions of narcissistic abuse, domestic abuse & mental health

took my cat to the vet bc her anxiety & overgrooming is still out of control

got home from the vet and she suddenly won’t put weight on her front right leg

take cat back to the vet, no obvious injury but painkillers are prescribed

4 days later mikasa has not improved, most likely a third vet trip tomorrow (also meaning i will have spent over $400 in less than a week on vet appts. worth it 1000% obviously. still a massive financial ouch tho)

while all that is happening, i find out the parent i have no contact with has:

started badmouthing me & my mum to parents of my high school friends (???? narcissists truly know no boundaries sksks)

HANDWRITTEN a letter to my nana (in ENGLAND!!! we live in AUSTRALIA!!!) stating he finds it “very odd” my mum no longer has any contact with him and he “doesn’t understand why” (uhhh maybe cos u threatened to kill her when she left u bro? and also every bit of abuse u levelled at us for the 30+ years before that? just a thought homeslice)

allegedly removed me from his will (inheriting some of ur genetics is enough for me dude, no sweat no sweat)

at the SAME TIME (bc god knows the universe has zero chill) my mother announces her boyf of 6 months is moving in (tbf he is lovely but jfc can everyone just slow down???)

both my siblings mental health are (understandably) collapsing

my anhedonia is now so bad i need to either increase my meds or come off them. pray 4 me either way

i ordered pizza last night and it was TERRIBLE. i’ve never had terrible pizza before, didn’t even know it was possible. fuck u dominos

this is five days worth of happenings. FIVE. DAYS.

anyway if anyone needs me, please look for the person-shaped lump hiding under some sort of blanket

#lets be real i’m hiding under the loads of laundry i cant bring myself to do #personal #i’m just so tired #and so sore #and so worried #and also angry #look at me naming feelings while feeling them #anyway ty for reading my vents

[theeio]

…yeah okay im burnt out

#also ty for your input on a previous post ive made ive read them all and taken them into consideration tysm🫡 #but yeah i havent been drawing for days my hyperfixtation got snuffed out for some reason my head is empty i havent been listening to music #any positive perception of my art has been thrown out the window #its a bit concerning bc this hasnt happened before #not all at once like this #i think its a sign i need to take a step back #ill go and touch some grass in the meantime #sorry for the lack of art lately ik its what you all followed me for and it must be disappointing #but anyway hope yall have been doing okay and taking care #💖 #vent #and as always if anyone has advice from personal experience to offer on how to deal with stuff like this im all ears

[moonlessbeast]

Literally cannot express enough how much I miss people I’ve lost constant touch with and how badly I wished I could reconnect. But I have chronic fatigue so severe at this point that I literally can’t and it’s sooooo defeating

#quacking #not to vent on main but I lost 1/3 of my therapy time so I didn’t get to talk abt it there #I miss my friends a lot. so so very much #it’s one of the worst things abt my disability situation tbh. I can’t afford to not work and the little energy I have basically all goes #towards working. and by the time I’m done I barely have the energy to engage with my partner and like one other person #so it’s just. insurmountable. and I hate it. I hate living like this #I want my friends and support system back but so much of it has withered away and idk if I can repair it #anyways. done venting ty for reading if you did

[decembermoonskz]

.

#vent.txt #I kinda feel really weird about like not writing fic #yk I obviously know there’s more to my life than writing fic and I can do it whenever #but I’m just amazed ppl follow me without me doing that yk? #idk weird feelings but it’s just like it felt like that was the main reason ppl followed me and yet they’re still #here #and I’m amazed and thankful and shocked all at once #idk it’s not like I’m tying my fics to my worth as a person or anything. nothing like that #it’s just like when ppl kept asking me about my fics I figured that’s all they wanted for a bit #like I myself didn’t really matter they just wanted to know why my fics aren’t available rn #and if ppl unfollow that’s none of my business obviously but it made those tiny thoughts pop out to me #so when you guys are kind to me and stuff and or send an ask in my inbox I’m genuinely shocked and happy that you came to talk to me yk? #this is how I end up seeing asks in my inbox a lot #so if you ever think ‘she’s awfully happy about an ask’ that’s why #anyways I just realized that I do miss writing fic but idk it feels like I’m just here yk? and I’m okay with being here and talking to fren #for right now that’s more than enough for my blog #if you made it to the end of this ty for reading? hahaha I’m just venting a bunch

[tomuras]

can’t tell if i’m falling out of love for writing fanfic or if i’ve just been super stressed out lately ahaha

#z.cries #only time will tell #i think partly watching my fics getting no feedback aside from a few #people also maybe just doesn’t give me the encouragement to write much anymore #but i’m prolly not done writing just need a break #should i go on hiatus? idck #idfk** #anyway this was an odd vent post?? #but i’m not necessarily upset about it #just an observation i made tbh #i’m in a great mood today and part of that is bc i havent been online #too many stressors online lately and its nice to disconnect from that a lot of times #uhm anyway if u read all that congrats and ty #i smooch u mwah 💋

[sateurn]

😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

These sobs really limited my tags?????

I have so many more thoughts this is so so much less than 1/2. Broski. Big dislike

#its ‘i watched a tv show and i need to talk about it in the tags of this site im not on anymore’ time #ty to the void for always accepting my thoughts <3 #so honestly its just me thinking about the andromeda tv show. i just finished it and it left me destitute bc i clung onto the first 2 season #s as a basis and had ten thousand questions i *assumed* would be resolved. spoiler alert: they were nto #not*. and the coda addition helps but like. not enough. it explains some of the #oh fyi if anyone is reading or cared there will be spoilers #anyways it explained some of them ex for the cosmic engine bit. seemed pretty relevant and then was never mentioned again #i also MUCH prefer that version of trance — i had speculation she was a sun avatar which i took as confirmation when i finally noticed her #tattoo when harper used it to remind himself he put that data in the sun etc etc but i much prefer the sun-as-consciousness-astral-poject- #ing-slash-dreamjng-itself-a-body / being a little devil. i think that feels much more true to what we got in worldbuilding early on and tbh #the bar is on the floor bc any explanation would be better than what we got. also im sorry but s5 i trusted SO hard that that whole virgil #vox bit in the finale was insulting. couldnt even tie up the loose end you invented at the last minute????? MY god. i understand getting you #r budget halved but like. broski. it would have been better to ignore it at that point imo. #anywhoodle. i also have just ISSUES w the lack of resolution & not doing justice to literally any character #listen. why would you sink SO much effort into tyr just to have honestly what i feel is a disrespectful end to that character. like #tyr required me to do a LOT of thinking bc i sympathized with his position in exile etc while thinking also bro thats real fucked up. bro #stop thats fuckinng e*genics again dude. tbh with the entire species (im not looking up how to spell that rn) bc like the foundation of #their entire race is e*ugenics. (sorry censoring bc im in the tags just venting about tv) which obviously is a terrible idea but i think the #so it was like i am fundamentally against the concept but in show universe theg obviously did it etc but for me provided such a huge like #context to the universe. i fundamentally am not on board with all the commonwealth stuff like yeah i get it the magog are bad and scary but #like the neitzcheans (sp??? idc) are also Right There bein scary. then theres the ‘enhanced’ debate re dylan beka etc that like. is the same #but ‘’different’’ i guess. 🙄 anyways that is just to point out like. the level of thinking this show put me through just to blindside me w/ #no resolution. i had SO much hope. tyr selling iut to the abyss is disrespectful to all of the established work the actor did for him and #to the character as well even if i think the ideology is icky. he was shown to be even less and less self-centric survival guy as it went on #and also tbh i didnt understand the him stealing his kids dna thing. i really thought that was gonna gi in a different less bs direction #okay also while im here can i just say. that tyr and dylan had THE most romantic tension to me. everyone else felt very friendshipy and i am #NOT one to usually fall into a ‘they obviously should be together’ pipeline that the writers dont make themselves. but the back and forth ( #and intense eye contact) had me sitting there like. it was made in 2000 i know they wont do it but for not doing it they sure did! not that #i think they’d make a good couple (they would not) but that there was definitely something there on the dl you know? something more than #‘mutual respect’ you feel? and tbh! they also ruined the tyr beka thing by making her the matriarch. big ew huge ick.

[mooodyblue]

venting in the tags don't mind me 🤥

#having to take a break from talking to one of my best friends bc im pissed at their response to me telling them abt lisa #and like idk i keep telling myself no ur not dramatic for acting this way but part of me feels bad #but also like #i will listen to the most triggering vents from this person but when the one time i needed someone badly they were just like #it's ok i have problems too #like i know ur damn problems mf i was literally grieving i still am #glad they don't know my url they judge me for writing about elvis anyway #been a long ass few days im slowly getting there tho #writing has been helping a lot #need to get back into reading my elvis books too #anyway vent over ty

[safyresky]

😤😮‍💨

I am once again venting below the cut, please enjoy this Jacqueline in the meantime:

GOOD LORD!! CIRCULAR CONVERSATIONS ARE GENUINELY SOOO FRUSTRATING. I've had my new car for a WEEK and for a WEEK it's been the SAME SHIT between the hubbers and the MIL:

He mentions the car bc he's excited about it

She goes on an emotionally charged RANT about how concerned she is that we went and bought this car and how she's worried about all the debt we have and that we won't be able to "just vibe"

He assures her we went over everything (which we did) and that it's affordable for us (it being the bi-weekly payment)

It stops there. He laments to me. I reassure. I boost him the FUCK UP LIKE HE DESERVES TO BE! 😤

He brings up the car again with her in the hopes she'll be like I'm also excited about this for you!!

She instead once more lectures us on debt

He once again reassures her

He comes to me lamenting once more

I am stuck watching this circle and smacking my head against the wall

I love this man so much, and he does NOT deserve the shit his mother is giving him and I VERY MUCH DISLIKE that he is STILL SEEKING HER APPROVAL. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE WE DIDN'T BUY THE CAR FOR HIM!! WE BOUGHT IT FOR M E AND HE CO-SIGNED BC THE PAYMENT IS CHEAPER AND HE IS VERY EXCITED THAT WE HAVE A NEW, RELIABLE VEHICLE THAT IS SAFE FOR ME! HE'S HAPPY I'M SAFE!

And he's NOT explaining this bit to his Mom, and keeps being like w/e her opinion doesn't matter

BUT THEN THEY HAVE THIS CONVERSATION AGAIN

AHHHHHH

I hate circular arguments y'all. They make me want to explodE. My entire morning/afternoon has been reassuring the hubbers and trying to point out how the convo is circular bc he's looking for her approval and excitement but she is looking for Something Else BC she's worried about our finances. Guys, imma be real with you. This is an affordable payment for us. It's literally only coming out of MY PAYCHECK since it's MY CAR and they BOTH seem to be forgetting that and it's causing this stupid discussion that won't end until either:

He tells her he's heard her concerns and asks her what she's looking for (since despite his reassurances and walking her thru the process we went thru last weekend and showing her the numbers and how it all works out fine she STILL keeps voicing her concerns, to the point where I haven't even talked with her about it but am dying to yell WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE US TO DO MARGE, GET RID OF THE CAR??? Because really, what WOULD you like us to do and it's presumptuous of you to assume we can't handle it and will need your help)

He tells her he's heard her concerns and asks her to just listen to his and please show some excitement because he's excited about it, so why can't you be

They let it die and never talk about it again the end OR

He understands that this is another one of those Margie being Margie scenarios and he's not gonna get her approval or excitement, and accepts that all he needs in this scenario is his OWN acceptance and excitement, and find a way to be OKAY with that

And I don't know how LIKELY any of these are going to be in the near future (and dw, I texted him that blurb already so hopefully it's on his mind and he makes good choices, good choices being either 1 or 4 bc this isn't gonna get resolved any time soon with my MIL's old fashioned REPRESS UR EMOTIONS ass 😤) so I am instead FUMING about situations OUTSIDE OF MY CONTROL bc as an outsider Incan see how it's going and after 4 years of therapy I can see what needs to be done bc I'VE BEEN THERE TOO

This situation has me so down it's making me wanna call and vent to my Mommy and that's how you KNOW it's yucky tbh

#dani speaks #dani vents #i don't often call my mom to vent these days bc she can be very similar to Richard's mom re: ur childs feelings #BUT MY GOD. I AM AT A LIMIT #anyway if u read the vent ty for reading I appreciate it 🩷 #we'll be okay! i know Richard will read those options and see what's going on and choose what works best for the time being #BUT MY GOD WATCHING THE CROSSFIRE?? IS STRESSFUL #I'M LIKE #THIS IS SO STUPID GUYS PLZ #anyway if anyone wonders why I wrote blinter the way I did #THIS IS WHY. I THINK PARENTS SHOULD MAKE UP WITH THEIR ADULT CHILDREN AND UNDERSTAND THE TRAUMAS AND THINGS #AND BE SUPER SUPPORTIVE #I THINK PARENTS NEED TO STOP THE AGE OLD HANDING OVER OF TRAUMA TO THE KIDS #GENERATIONAL TRAUMA IS AO FRUSTRATING AND SO EASILY AVOIDABLE BUT IT DOES ENOUGH DAMAGE THAT IT KEEPS GOING! #FUCK THE CYCLE ALL MY HOMIES HATE THE CYCLE #and if anyone is wondering. i am VERY excited about the new car #being able to drive again without breakdown anxiety and in a car that isn't crumbling to dust around me #is STELLAR! I WANT TO CRY HAPPY TEARS! I HAVE MY FREEDOM BACK! THE MONEY WE'LL SAVE ON SUDDEN REPAIRS #IS GONNA BE SO NICE #I'm 😭😭😭 #it's just so reliving and I feel so annoyed that MIL doesn't see it like that and is focusing on 'startung ur marriage out in debt' #sweetie. I've been paying student loans for 5 years. We were ALREADY starting with debt and our payment plan is FINE #WE HAVE JOB SECURITY #OTHERWISE I WOULDN'T HAVE DONE IT #AND IF WE SUDDENLY DON'T #WE SELL ONE OF THE CARS #Boom. done. #ANYWAY. IMMA GO GROCERY SHOPPING NOW #BC I CAN BC MY CAR IS RELIABLE!! AH! #out of context jacquelines

[seimei-chsq]

…sorry i’m going to be a bitch for a second

#if you read this… ty for hearing me out and also i’m sorry #okay first off. i try to like… exercise some maturity when it comes to being a sports fan. i try not to be petty and childish. #but i’m in a petty mood today so! i apologize in advance lmao #anyways… i really think i’m going to have to filter * content from my dash. watching him land the 4A makes me feel… idk. #i’m not ~upset~ but i am… ugh. like obviously no one has exclusive rights to a jump and he hasn’t landed it in comp yet and also #it LITERALLY doesn’t matter if he lands it first or not. but in further reflection i don’t think that’s the reason i’m feeling :/ about it? #like. it’s not about who lands it first or whatever. it’s about seeing someone achieve something RELATIVELY ‘effortlessly’ #while we have to watch yz try and fail and try again and fail but fail better… it’s the nature of sports i know #and i’m so proud of yz and his determination and his hard work. i’m not discounting that!! #but afagajsksls Maybe this is just trauma from my ~gifted kid~ days when i would give something 110% and then have to watch #as my classmates achieved more than i did with half of the effort i put into it #like it’s probably that. it’s me projecting. #… idk where i’m was going with this. #yz’s 4A matters to me because when he lands it in a masterfully crafted program (and he will!!) #it will be the final jewel in the crown of his career. the 4A is just another jump to * and that’s why i don’t care about him landing it #i PROMISE i don’t harbour any ill will towards * — i wish him all the best in his career! #but i’m still going to root for my faves to come out on top yknow? #anyways! this isn’t meant to be a serious post lol. just a little venting (and if you like * that’s cool! more power to you) #okay now back to our regularly schedule programming <3

[astrxealis]

owhhh okay i think i'm p tired ... gn in advance y'all

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #tired not as in Sleepy i mean the other Tired but i'll be fine TvT #anyways aaa ebg ends soon !! like a day or two !! so uh :squints: to all those who have sabotaged me ily very very much and really #appreciate it sm TvT LIKE HELRPWJDJSJ ik i shld feel :(( <//3 yes but also knowing i was actually like. y'all make the game fun ... TvT #yes yes so uhhhhhh help im heating up IDHSIWJEKS (shy) #OKAY so to sam & lune esp bcs damn y'all hate me fr 💔 /nm n ofc cal lettē n that 1 anon im p sure is anoushka (embarrassed if im wrong but #yes <3 IDHSIDNS) tyvm friends TvT aaaaaaa ebg isnt over yet but im feelin a lil ack these days ehehhehehdhehdh so yeah #i feel like i havent rlly gotten much sabotages compared to my fellow mutuals who r playing JDUEWHIJWJS so ya just a rlly HUGE ty to u guys #it means a lot to me even if it prolly seems like smth small >< ✨ aaaaeeeeee #i prolly won't send sabotages as much anymore tho bcs i'm feeling tired now TvT wont elaborate but yes WHEEZEHWRWIDJSOSKAOSPAJDKANSOAO #nah idk maybe im just overhtinking again or wtvr i dunno man but just not feeling it rn again brrrrrrrrr #ill head to sleep b4 3 am !! yesterday was b4 5 so now will be b4 3 hopefully ehe #please Do Not perceive this post /nf /lh ODBWIDNWKDJSK now goodbye B) #dw later today when its actually proper morning or afternoon im sure ill be fine again B)) always am #tw vent ish #i hate feeling this way brrr i always try to focus on the good positive and happy but #yeah :') #if i start distancing myself again rirhwiwhdiehkde i'll most likely be fine so no need to worry at all abt me or wtvr ^^ #i doubt anyonr will even see or read this post (?) but if u need pls know i rlly genuinely do appreciate it jdhsjd ilysm aha :') 💖 #TvT i just bottle my feelings up a lot okay ORHRIEHEIEHKAJS and i feel like ive been doing that again for quite a long time so im just #kinda breaking rn again :') ill really be okay soon tho for sure 🫶🏼 #tw vent #im like 90% sure no one will even notice this so its fine if i just post this ya rhe

[nervousmonolith]

how my mother feels after screaming at me over my symptoms of misophonia which i cannot control

#monolith mumbles #we bawling and balling #she also screamed at me for something that wasnt my fault either the day of my ty graduation but anyways #should make her read the essay i wrote but she'll probably be pissed♥️ #vent #anyway wow great parenting im sure this wont have any long lasting affects!/s

[toastsnaffler]

why does being at my parents make me feel so physically ill. theyre not even HERE.

#I can feel my lifeforce draining away I cant do anything and I keep crying randomly for no reason. trapped in the torture labyrinth #i just want to fucking work out. but i cant and my head hurts and im giving up and walking onto the railway track behind the house #I think I just deal rly badly with change + transitions even if thats just travelling which is a shame bc I actually like travelling #and I like spending time w my family but theyre not even here rn anyway so #zero executive function turtle on its back type shit going on here and im so!! lonely!! i need a thousand year long hug #dies and dies and dies and dies and djes and dies and #except its fine like its rly not that bad. and being in the flat is its own different but not necessarily better type of insane #like okay my brain isnt working here. but what have I been doing the last couple months there. exactly lmfao #the problem rly isnt even being here its just me. but idk how to explain that to other ppl bc theyre just like well dont go home! #u dont owe anything to ur family! like not to be rude but shut up. that might work for u but clearly u understand nothing abt me #or my relationship with my family. like yeah i complain abt them + being at home but ur perception of that is heavily biased #bc im not going to complain to u abt u or how mentally ill i get in the flat. am i now. exactly. they all probably think im fine lmfao #or if not fine then like. coping alright. instead of being in survival mode half the time #who fuckinf cares whatever ik I dont mean all the shit im thinking anyway im just in a piss poor mood !!!! #im going to shower. and then go get smth to eat. and find a movie to watch. and hopefully ill feel better then #and if not well theres always tomorrow or next week or next month itll pass #urgrjhfhdhh #.vent #sorry everyone if ur reading this im blowing u a big kiss for being so tolerant of my dumbass ranting ty

[elliespassagerprincess]

Mary - (ellie williams x reader)

for @fleshunger ty for being patient, ily <3

This story is based off the song Mary by Alex G, if you can please listen to the song as you're reading! There is another version to this fic! You can read it here:)

Pairing: ellie x fem!reader

requests are open again! send me your silly thoughts

warnings: angst.

Summary: in which you left her to rot

authors note: lmao yall probably hate me for posting so much, forgive me pookies, I swear after tomorrow i'll post less....

Mary is the girl that I wanna kiss

She's got big red eyes and big red lips

She's got big sharp teeth and big fat hips

Mary is the girl that I wanna fuck

She's got leather heart and leather gloves

She's the only girl that I wanna love

"I wanna kiss her so bad" Ellie vented to Dina.

Dina rolled her eyes at Ellie.

She was in love. Really in love.

In all the years Dina has known Ellie she has never seen her this down bad.

"What's so special about this girl anyway?" She asked as she took a bite from Ellie's sandwich.

"What type of a question is that?" Ellie asked. She felt disrespected on your behalf.

"She's got beautiful eyes- and she looks good with red lipstick. Even without lipstick, her lips are so kissable"

A small smile appeared on Dina's face as she listened to her friend describe the girl she was so deeply in love with.

"She's got big fat hips too and I just want to eat her-"

"woah Ellie calm down, that's too much information"

Ellie's face went red with embarrassment.

"How'd you meet her" Dina asked.

"at a fruit Market" Ellie replied with a shrug.

Bananas or oranges?

Bananas?

Oranges?

Ellie was currently thinking about what she should get as she stood in front of the fruit stand. Since when was it so fucking difficult to choose fruit?

"If you think harder, much you might explode" she heard someone chuckle next to her.

Ellie turned to where your voice was coming from, her heart rate suddenly increased.

Angles are fucking real.

"um- yeah" Ellie responded awkwardly.

She cleared her throat and she fixed her posture.

"Bananas or orange?" She asked you.

What the fuck Ellie? Why would you fucking ask that?

You turned your head to look at the fruit, before you reached out to grab a banana.

"It looks fresher" you shrugged as you gave the banana to her.

Your fingertips brushed against hers, and a shock of electricity ran through Ellie.

Her palms felt sweaty, she couldn't breathe.

Focus Ellie. Focus.

"Thank you" You gave her a small smile as you started walking away.

'C'mon Ellie make your move' she thought to herself.

"hey wait!" Ellie yelled as you started walking away.

You turned around to look at her.

"Can I have your number?"

"That's fucking cliché" Dina laughed.

"shut up" Ellie muttered annoyed.

The two girl fell into a comfortable silence as Ellie's thoughts wondered to you.

Oh you would've loved this salad. You would've loved this ice tea. Maybe she should've asked you to come out instead of Dina

*ding*

Ellie reached down to grab her phone. It was you.

Her girl.

Not officially her girlfriend yet, but soon.

She clicked onto the notification with your name.

"Come over please"

fuck yes

Ellie jumped up, and she looked at Dina with a grin.

"My girl is looking for me"

Dina laughed at her friends excitement.

"go get her tiger"

Ellie gave Dina a hug as she ran towards your apartment.

Today she felt confident. Today she was the day she was going to ask you to be her girlfriend. You messaging her was a sign from the gods above.

Ellie's legs were hurting, and she was out of breathe but she was on her way to finally tell the girl of her dreams that she was the one she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.

Listen to me, baby, I don't mind

I wanna be with you and waste my time

Give it to me, baby, I feel good

I wanna feel whatever you think I should

Sing it for me, baby, play my song

I wanna hear your daddy sing along

Mary is the girl that leaves you to rot

She says, "I am real and you are not"

She says, "I am real and you are not"

Ellie knocked at your front door.

She kept knocking and she's been standing outside of your apartment for the last 10 minutes.

Where were you? Maybe you were laying dead on the floor?

Ellie knocked and knocked but yet you never came.

Was this a prank?

She held the doorknob as she opened the door.

It was open this whole time.

Ellie slowly walked into your apartment, and she looked around the place you called home.

It felt oddly empty.

The little trinkets you kept around was all suddenly gone.

The apartment filled with so much life at one point, suddenly dull and lifeless.

Ellie's eyes went around the room and her eyes landed on a white envelope.

On the front was your pretty handwriting and Ellie's name decorated the front.

With shaky hands Ellie picked it up, and she opened it.

Dear Ellie

Or should I say banana girl?

She chucked remembering your first interaction.

I'm sorry for what I'm about to tell you, please don't hate me. I truly never wanted to hurt you Ellie. But I know you have feelings for me. I don't feel the same way. I never wanted to reject you, because I valued our friendship too much. So for the sake of your feelings, I left. I changed my number, so you wont be able to message me. I'm sorry Els.

I love you.

Ellie didn't realize that she started shaking till she finished reading the letter.

She tore the letter apart and her knees buckled.

She fell to the ground sobbing.

You made feel so alive, but you just killed her again.

All the love Ellie had for you was rotting away into hated.

She loved you so much but you left her to rot.

#Spotify #ellie x reader #ellie #ellie miller #ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie tlou x reader #ellie tlou2 #ellie tlou2 x reader #ellie williams #ellie williams angst #ellie williams blurb #ellie williams core #ellie williams drabble #ellie williams fan fic #ellie williams fanfic #ellie williams fanfiction #ellie williams fic #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams imagine #ellie williams one shot #ellie williams oneshot #ellie williams promlt #ellie williams the last of us #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams tlou2 #ellie williams x fem reader #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x reader smut

[silence-between-seconds]

Hey there, love

I'm Sirius and this is my attempt at an intro post. anyway, you can call me siri ;)

pick any pronouns from: he/she/they || I'm genderfluid || INFJ

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Sooooooo, if you wanna know, here it goes

Gonna tell you there's a part of me that shows, if we're close

Gonna let you see everything

But remember that you asked for it

I'll try to do my best to impress,

But it's easier to let you take a guess at the rest

But you wanna hear what lives in my brain and my heart

Well, you asked for it

For your perusin', at times confusin'

Hopefully amusin', introducing me<3

I've never

really been into cars,

I like really cool guitars and superheroes

And checks with lots of zeros on 'em

I love the sound of violins

And makin' someone smile

(yes I just inserted a disney song to introduce myself. go listen to it if you want it's called Introducing Me by nick jonas)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

my life motto is "do no harm but take no shit". That's right, I have my wise moments.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

I'd say this mood board just about sums up my personality, except, as all humans are, I'm obviously more complex than that.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

@her-midas-touch is a poet and wrote this for me hehe:

Run out of metaphors great enough, my fingers paint a wraith

To faint to capture essence, mere shimmery traces of feelings

Every cheshire cat smile, every whirlwind idea, every leap of faith for every apathetic eye, missing the moment, is a soul

that sings

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩💐

click here for the playlist on Spotify by my lovely siv @good-oldfashioned-lover about what my soul is supposedly made of.

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩💐

this is my ao3 acc feel free to check it out

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩💐

feel free to interact<3 promise to advice/ listen if you wanna vent/ hyperfixations

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩💐

lovely mutuals:

@good-oldfashioned-lover @her-midas-touch@daydream-of-a-wallflower@hermioneswifeee

@literallytoogaytofunction@lilbeanz@reisbackinblack@dementorfromazkaban@deprivedofbraincellsandsleep

@starryrain@lizluvscupcakes@urbanflorals @accio-sriracha@siriusly-remu

@werewolfenthusiast@none-of-it-was-accidental@feelin-sad-and-gay@jaylienpotter@illustratinglaura

@nothingtoseeherebyeexx @silverscreenlipstick @moonysversion @mochami-mochi @sleepinginmygrave

@icarus-last-fall @a-beautiful-fool @shuhuaspookie @xi-phos @here-for-a-good-time-hopefully

@stars-over-ice-cream @kaaaaaaarf @re-is-back-in-black @rookofthekingom @not-rab

@toxik-angel @marylily-my-beloved @good-oldfashioned-lover-girl @bloophasarrived @m0st-ard3ntly

@cressthebest

(i hope i got everyone?)

mess with my friends and I will hurt you :)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Things I love:

singing, marauders era, any and all kinds of art, poetry, books, fanfiction, the harry potter fandom (jkr can piss off tho), arctic monkeys, k-pop (bts, txt, svt, skz, treasure and a few more bands), renne rapp, taylor swift's music, conan gray, plushies, the moon, the stars, basically space, chai, biking, CHOCOLATE, nature, writing, badminton, musical instruments and a million little nothings

currently listening to: space girl by Frances Forever

fav authors/books: ruskin bond, the alchemist, ronald dahl, to kill a mockingbird, memoirs of sherlock holmes, and many more im too lazy to type out. ok look i love reading but the last thing i read was definitely on ao3

movies/shows: Heartstopper, Red white and royal blue, Loki, hazbin hotel, helluva boss, Night at the Museum, Marvel (not sucha fan of mcu), highschool musical (2 is my fav), Luca (2021) and most other pixar and disney movies, (i love animated movies so much)

bollywood has only managed to make a select few good movies out of which im absolutely crazy about like znmd, dangal and super 30

DNIs don't work so I guess I'll just say: fuck around and find out :)

this video made by the wonderful @urbanflorals is so me, i wanted to add it<3

alright ty for visiting my blog, you are welcome to stay

Toodles<3

#intro post #this was exhausting #get to know me #the marauders #marauders #marauders era #hp #harry potter #taylor swift #conan gray #music #punk rock #books #kpop #bts #txt #svt #seventeen #wolfstar #sirius black #hp marauders #the marauders era #sirius black kinnie #adding tags about what i love so people notice me #poetry #words words words #prose #arctic monkeys #writing

[sl-vega]

random slight vent post? Idk more like a semi-hiatus update

Hi y'all! First off I want to thank you all for all your support on my fics (specifically MHBFY) and it really means the world to me! I'm so glad you guys like my writing

And I love writing too, but I probably won't be posting new fics or chapters anytime soon. I don't know what it is, but motivating myself to write is getting harder and harder and I don't want to burn myself out and lose my passion for it altogether

I might also take a break from being active on here, but dw fellow moots I'll still read and interact with your stuff and your writing (@strxs-and-hearts, @mwahkazu, @scaradooche ISTG I WILL BE STALKING THOSE SMAU UPDATES TILL IT KILLS ME-)

Anyways that's abt it! I'll try to chip away at some requests I've gotten when I have the time or energy, and that's abt all I wanted to say! Ty again for all the love and support!

#{!} UPDATE

[g-xix]

Just wanted to say I literally love reading your pov on everything, like i click on notifs soo fast 😭😭😭

Also as someone whos basically been in a similar situation as Dannys ex, the respect hes lost for me is.... yeah

UNRELATED NOTE, IM OBSESSED WITH THIS KENNY EDIT SOO HERE: https://www.instagram.com/p/C2c3Si-IrSm/?igsh=MWJsbHF2YmZid2Fkdw==

Anyways love you and love reading your stuff <33

~ T

Awwhh hey T!

That's bare cute yk i acc appreciate like mad, especially today, cuz i got told to shut up from someone who i stupidly invested a lot in previously.

Don't know whether that made sense but basically, it just hurt a lot more than it should've n was just kinda humiliating overall esp bc it happened in front of other ppl ://

And whoa sorry, slightly inconsiderate vent before i'd even read the second bit, that is fr like so bad to have gone thru man, and i can't imagine what seeing this happen w a YT-er (that im assuming you used to follow) must be like. Not mentioning the fact that also then having to see the audience response to all of this must be awful, considering so many boys online (practically all of them) seem to empathise w Danny and show 0 remorse or sympathy towards his ex.

And third bit: KENNY EDIT. Omds i j watched that, holy fuck he's so fucking fine oh my fuck that edit is so underrated, the song and all the clips chosen AHHHHHH Kenny's acc too leng for me to compute Never getting over this man tbh, my standards r gonna b so high when i start dating n it's all bc of these YouTube men im watching

And ty for msging actually, i feel like i weirdly reflected a lot whilst replying... Love u too and i appreciate just your in general, T :)🫡💗

#WAFFLE!! #danny aarons #T anon