SUMMARY: Regulus has a nightmare, and Barty's there to help him through it. _________________________________________ Regulus couldn't make sense of the situation in front of him, but it all made sense at the same time. He saw his brother, Sirius, a few years younger, hugging a younger version of himself. He then saw his brother smiling at him before heading off to Hogwarts for the first time, which was also a few years ago. He then saw a more recent version of Sirius walking off with his friends, the marauders. As he continued to walk away, his face began to fade, and that's when Regulus's heart sank. Sirius is leaving. Regulus tried to reach out. He desperately grabbed out in the direction Sirius was going, but it was too late. Sirius is gone.
Regulus's eyes flew open without warning as he panted heavily. His dorm room, which he shared with his friends Evan and Barty, was enveloped in darkness. As Regulus became more aware of his surroundings, he could feel his sweat drenched skin stick to his sheets, making him cringe slightly. He felt his eyes sting with uncalled for tears, and his throat grow sore, as if wire was tightly wrapped around it. Not even a second later, he abruptly became aware of the hand rubbing his shoulder, which he realized was there ever since he woke up from his nightmare.
Panicked, he turned his head to see who was rubbing his shoulder, but he relaxed as he saw it was just Barty.After a moment of trying to recompose himself, Regulus spoke.
“I'm sorry if I woke you up”
Barty looked at him, looking with worry as he responded.
“I was already awake, couldn't sleep.Now are you OK? You look like a kicked puppy.”
Regulus glared at Barty. In all honesty, he was far from being OK. He probably didn't even know what being fully OK felt like. Regulus felt stupid for wanting to cry over a simple nightmare. He'd had them his whole life. It then came to him that it wasn't just a nightmare. It was a reflection of the truth. Him and Sirius used to be each other's first pick. They went through everything together. No matter how shitty of a situation they were in, it was always OK because they were together. Not anymore, though. Ever since Sirius came back from his first year,all He could talk about were the other friends he made, and it made Regulus feel absolutely worthless. He and Sirius were together their whole lives, but then all of a sudden, Sirius meets some random kids his age and replaces him. Was he really that replaceable?
Every year,they became further apart. It got to the point where Sirius wouldn't even look in his direction. Sirius never noticed Regulus's long stares, he never realized how much betrayal he caused Regulus to feel (which made Regulus even more upset since Sirius promised to never hurt him), Sirius never noticed the butterfly drawings that stained his wrists when his sleeves rode up his arm. Sirius literally ran away without even considering taking Regulus with him, and it broke Regulus into pieces. Regulus was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't even feel his tears drip down his face, until Barty looked at him shocked (since he never showed that much emotion.)
Regulus quickly covered his face with his hands to try and save some of his dignity, but failed miserably because of the sound of his sobs. After Barty got over his shock he put both of his hands on the his friends shoulders “Hey Reggie what's wrong? Come on talk to me.”
Through his sobs, he managed to say “I'll never be good enough. No matter what I do he won't come back. He promised to never hurt me, but he did Barty! He lied! Why did he leave without me? He said that he'd always be with me, no matter what, and he fucking left me. He left me with all of his problems. He left me without ever looking back!”
Barty quickly realized it was Sirius Regulus was talking about. He never wanted to kill Sirius as much as he did now.
“Hey come on Reg, look at me. Your brother is the dumbest, most oblivious, most ungrateful person ever, because he left you. You are fucking amazing despite what you might think of yourself. So don't ever let him leaving make you think you're worthless. You are worth everything in the universe and more.”
Regulus wanted to cry even more now. Sirius has said many nice things, but nothing as heartfelt as that. He started to cry even harder than before.
“OH shit. Fuck Reg that was not supposed to make you cry more, I'm sorry”
“No I'm sorry, I'm such a baby” Regulus sobbed.
“No you're not, don't ever say that. Trust me, you are stronger than most people with all the bullshit you deal with.”
Regulus breathed in and out heavily. His once uneven breathing finally calmed down, and his vision started to clear more. Barty was still sitting in front of him on his soft bed. Barty waited patiently for Regulus to calm down and speak when he was ready. After a moment, Regulus layed back down onto his bed, resting his head on the silk pillowcase. Barty then stood up to go back to his bed, but before he could, Regulus caught his wrist in his hand and pulled him with no real force.
“Stay with me?” Regulus asked in a hushed tone.
Barty looked at him in silence for a few seconds before he nodded as a yes.
Regulus moved to the right side of his bed and pulled down the cover on the left as an invitation for Barty. Barty quickly but quietly made his way over to the bed and carefully crawled in. At first, it was awkward (since none of them had ever slept in the same bed before. Not that they were complaining), and they kept to their own sides of the bed.
Regulus closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep until he felt warm arms wrap around him. Regulus froze in place and opened his eyes to look at Barty, whose eyes widened when he realized Regulus was awake.
“Sorry, I thought you were asleep” Barty whispered as he let go of Regulus.
Regulus then moved closer to Barty and pressed himself against his chest. He then grabbed Barty's arms and put them behind his own back to make Barty hold him again. Barty went stiff for a few seconds Before he finally relaxed against the smaller boy, and that night they both fell asleep to the lullaby of each others heartbeat (and Evan's heavy ass snoring because he slept through all of this).
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Barty: From now on we'll be using code names! I'll be "eagle 1"
Barty: *points to Regulus* Reggie is "been there done that"
Regulus: 😑
James: hey now-
Barty: *points to Evan* Evan is "currently doing that"
Evan: *smirks and highfives Barty*
Barty: *points to Remus* Remus is "happened once in a dream"
Remus: *lifts an eyebrow*
Sirius: *offended gasp*
Barty: *points to Dorcas* Cas is "if I had to pick a girl"
Dorcas: *snorts* in your dreams Crouch
Barty: And Dora is
Pandora:
Evan:
Dorcas:
Regulus:
Barty: "eagle 2"
Evan and Pandora: oh thank god
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