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here-am-i-sitting-in-a-tin-can · 3 days

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James “and then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like ‘I love you’” Potter

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that-bitch-kat3 · 1 day

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rip james potter you would have hated situationships

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the-great-1989-cheese-disaster · 22 hours

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Evan: Is something burning?

Barty: Just my love for you.

Evan: Barty, the toaster is on fire.

#hp #harry potter #harry potter incorrect quotes #hp marauders #harry potter marauders #marauders incorrect quotes #marauders fandom #marauders #marauders era #barty crouch jr incorrect quotes #barty crouch jr #barty crouch junior #evan rosier incorrect quotes #evan rosier #rosekiller incorrect quotes #rosekiller

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my-castles-crumbling · 2 hours

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Sirius: Just please, James. Do not hit on my brother when you meet him.

James, confused: Alright, Pads. Why would I?

Sirius: No offense, mate, but you have a type.

James, still confused. A type?

-

Regulus, rolling his eyes: Fuck off, Potter.

James, with heart eyes: Marry me.

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mxskellington · 2 days

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*in muggle studies* Minnie: Some muggles don’t live close enough to shops to buy fresh cream, so they buy it powdered Peter: How do you powder cream? Minnie: Once the cows are milked, you cook it to dehydrate it. Sirius: ??? James:(who was not listening) Merlin Pads, why do you look so scared? Sirius: Minnie just said that some muggles bake cows in to powder James: WHAT Remus: Merlin Prongs, powered milk is gross but not “made-of-baked-cows” gross Lily: Hey watch it Rem, I grew up with powdered milk James: Lily! You drank the muggle cow powder??? Lily: What? James it’s not— Sirius: Evans how could you Peter: What the fuck Lily Minnie: Potter! Pettigrew! Also, its professor, Sirius. Besides, powdered cream is not made from dehydrated cows its made from dehydrated milk. Minnie: *sighs*

... *reading Romeo and Juliet in muggle studies* Peter: *reading stage directions* Romeo dies Remus [reading as Romeo]: Oh thank fuck I’m dead, I can go back to my book now Remus: I’m just glad I died before I had to marry THAT idiot Barty [reading as Juliet]: *from across the room* OH FUCK YOU TOO LUPIN

...

*in muggle studies*

Barty: So you're telling me that muggles have come up with flavored milk? Pandora: Yes, its quite lovely. Barty: But where the fuck does it come from? How does the chocolate get in the milk? Pandora: Chocolate cows! Regulus: Panda you realize that chocolate milk comes from regular cows, right? Evan: No, she's right, it comes from brown cows Regulus: No, it doesn't Evan: Yes, it does Regulus: No, it doesn't Evan: Yes, it does! Ask Dorcas! Regulus: Cas! Tell Ev that chocolate milk doesn't come from *chocolate* cows Dorcas: *walks away*

#marauders #slytherin skittles #muggle studies #the marauders inspired by my dumbass classmates #dead gay wizards #marauders incorrect quotes

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lifeandlies-of-regulusblack · 13 hours

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Someone: i have abandonment issues because my parents left and never came back.

Regulus: felt.

A skittle: your parents abandoned you?

Regulus: yes, sirius left. that's what i meant.

—

Someone: losing a child means losing a piece of yourself. you spend years making a home out of your existence just so you can hold the soul of another inside you, and watch them grow. there's a place in your being which you've carved out for someone to fill. when they're gone, that space still aches for what it used to hold.

Sirius: *sniffles*

Peter: did you have a child we never knew about? *is genuinely alarmed*

Sirius: my boy... i left regulus and he's still there with them...

—

Regulus doesn't have abandonment issues. He had sirius abandonment issues. Sirius was never, at one point, a young father. Regulus is just offspring shaped.

Together, they're both trauma alarms.

#regulus black #the black brothers #sirius black #marauders era #regulus headcanon #sirius headcanon #sirius and regulus #hp marauders #dead gay wizards #marauders incorrect quotes #my writing

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isabel-lillah · 7 hours

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marauders era characters as quotes

"a child who does not receive warmth from the village will burn it down to feel it" - Barty

#barty crouch jr #barty crouch jr headcanon #dead gay wizards #marauders #marauders era #the marauders #the slytherin skittles #marauders incorrect quotes #incorrect marauders quotes #barty crouch junior #marauders headcanon

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rudamaruda520 · 20 hours

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The crap my mom did one time, but it's Remus Lupin

Sirius: *smokes a cigarette on the balcony*

Remus: *furiously knocks on the window* You smoke?! How dare you! This will kill you! I can't believe my eyes!

Sirius: *still smokes unfazed*

(Literally a minute later)

Remus: *sticks his head out the window* Sooo... can I have one?

#marauders era #marauders #marauders incorrect quotes #the marauders #remus lupin #sirius black #wolfstar #hc #remus x sirius #remus being remus

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whydousernamesevenexist · 7 hours

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Evan: So why are you covered in blood again?

Barty: It wasn't my fault this time!

Evan: I seriously doubt that.

Barty: It wasn't!

#rosekiller #rosekiller incorrect quotes #marauders incorrect quotes #harry potter marauders #the marauders era #marauders era #the marauders #marauders #marauders fandom #slytherin skittles #barty x evan #barty crouch jr #evan rosier #dead gay wizards

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not-rab · 5 months

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13-year-old Sirius: You know what, I think it's time we started swearing. When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'll swear first and then you.

12-year-old Regulus: Okay.

[downstairs]

Walburga: What do you want for breakfast?

Sirius: I'll have Cocoa Puffs, bitch.

Walburga: Go to your room!

Walburga, to Regulus: And what do you want?

Regulus: Dunno but it won't be fucking Cocoa Puffs.

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marvelomadness06 · 2 months

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Remus: James… why do you have bite marks on your arms?

James: *sweating nervously* OH- oh, Urm I was babysitting my little cousin and- and he bites. haha.

Remus: *raises one eyebrow*

Sirius: *sympathetic* That sucks mate. Reggie was a fucking biter too- reckon I’ve still got scars from the little shit.

James: *quietly squeaks*

Remus: *raises the other eyebrow*

James: … I’ve got to go *absolutely bolts*

Sirius: what was that about?

Remus: *sighs* It would appear that you and James have the same cousin.

#black brothers #marauders incorrect quotes #marauders #sirius black #james potter #remus lupin #wolfstar #regulus black #james & peter & remus & sirius #Jegulus #starchaser #regulus is a biter. argue with the wall #Sirius and regulus are cousins and brothers…

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chasingthestarss · 14 days

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James: I’ve got a question to ask you

Regulus: as long as it’s not “will you marry me”

James: *silence

Regulus: wait

Regulus: was it?

Regulus: was it “will you marry me”

James: Well I’m not going to ask now

Regulus: no! Restart!

James: moments gone

Regulus: then bring it back!

#dead gay wizards #marauders era #marauders incorrect quotes #regulus black #james potter #jegulus #jegulus incorrect quotes #starchaser #sunseeker #james proposing gone wrong #oblivious jegulus #oblivious regulu black

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that-bitch-kat3 · 7 months

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walburga: you’re not good enough for my son

remus: you’re not good enough for your son

walburga: excuse me?

remus: you heard me.

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loz-tearsofahomo · 3 months

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James: and so I'm pretty sure I'm in love with Reg-

Evan: I'm sorry?

James: Well hes-

Evan: No I'm just sorry.

Barty: yeah mate praying for you

#marauders #hp #Slytherin skittles #jegulus #james potter #starchaser #regulus black #barty crouch jr #evan rosier #the slytherin skittles #the marauders #marauders era #marauders incorrect quotes #harry potter incorrect quotes #harry potter #loz posts #rosekiller

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my-castles-crumbling · 5 months

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Falling asleep in the dorms…

“Sirius?”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t think I like Evans anymore.”

“Shit mate, took you long enough.”

“Heh. Yeah.”

…

“Sirius?”

“Yeah, Prongs?”

“I might like boys. Also. Like as well as girls.”

“Join the club, Prongs. Just stay the fuck away from Moony.”

“Noted.”

…

“Sirius?”

“Yeah, mate?”

“What if I like a particular bloke?”

“…it’s not me, is it? Because Moony would probably kill you.”

“No.”

….

“Sirius?”

“Yes, Prongs?”

“It’s your brother.”

“I know.”

“You know?”

“Yeah, I was just fucking with you before.”

“Right.”

…

“Sirius?”

“Yes Prongs?”

“That’s…it’s okay?”

“Yes, James. I’d rather it be you than anyone else, to be honest.”

“Alright.”

…

“Sirius?”

“Go the fuck to sleep, Prongs. We’ll come up with a plan to woo him tomorrow.”

“Alright.”

….

“James?”

“What’s up, Padfoot?”

“Take care of him, alright?”

“…..yeah. Yeah, of course.”

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mxskellington · 22 hours

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[Regulus and Pandora walk out to see Barty and Evan lying side be side on the ground next to a forklift and a muggle car]

Regulus: We were gone for ten minutes what the hell happened

Evan: Well we were sort of racing a muggle Ferrari against a forklift

Regulus: Of course you were, what bloody else would you two be doing Pandora: Then you…

Evan: [standing up] …crashed it into a tree, yeah

Regulus: How did you two even get to this point

Evan: Bee’s a psychopath

Barty: [still on the ground] And you’re my boy scout Rosie, we equal each other out

Regulus: *sighs*

Barty: Maybe next time I’ll jack a lexus, ‘least give the forklift a fighting chance

[This was the incident that lost Barty his muggle drivers license]

(based off that one scene from royal pains with Tucker and Ollie)

#marauders #slytherin skittles #dead gay wizards #regulus black #panda rosier #even rosier #barty crouch jr #marauders incorrect quotes

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