#based on a true story because i did that as a fetus when my mom was pregnant with me… but luffy must’ve been 1000 times worse

[latinokokonoi]

luffy must’ve been jumping and kicking every single day when he was a fetus in crocodile’s uterus

#based on a true story because i did that as a fetus when my mom was pregnant with me… but luffy must’ve been 1000 times worse #thoughts and prayers for croco’s uterus because it must’ve gotten scarred for life #i wonder if he got a hysterectomy #queue&a by svt and ailee #one piece #one piece headcanons #crocodad theory #crocodad #one piece crocodile #trans crocodile #desert king sir crocodile #sir crocodile #crocodile #one piece luffy #straw hat luffy #monkey d. luffy #monkey d luffy #luffy #pregnancy tw

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

I haven't been able to shake a discomfort in Cas' path from s12 on - whatever people call what happened when fetus Jack's powers reached Cas' mind, the whole thing, even for Kelly, still had a sense of prophecy to it, of defined path and destiny, that to me poisons Cas' free will. His whole relationship with Jack is based on a vision of "something meant to happen" - Cas can still CHOOSE, but the choices are meant to lead in a specific place that he didn't define himself. What do you think ?

I absolutely think that it was a mess, and I think that that was because they didn’t actually planned the entire thing in advance, or maybe just kept switching what the arc was supposed to be like.

At the time fandom debate about Jack’s ~paradise visions~ got kind of nasty but I think there was no real right and wrong, but simply the show was, like... putting the foot in two shoes.

Fetus Jack storyline starts out as your, apparently, classic demon baby horror story. But wait! Is the baby really evil...? the narrative asks. It’s ambiguous. It’s supposed to be ambiguous. Is Kelly being brainwashed by the baby? Is Cas being brainwashed by the baby? Is the baby a neutral force with a very high potential of danger?

I think that until The Future, the narrative plays with the ambiguity. It’s possible that the intention was always to play the storyline as a subversion of the horror baby trope, making the baby eventually a positive force. But during most of the pregnancy arc we have no answers. There are no answers to be given, actually, because the baby is some sort of ambiguous amoral force with his own motivations. He protects his mother - which is a self-preserving move when you’re a fetus, anyway - and then “picks” Castiel over Dagon, possibly because his mother feels safe with Cas and feels threatened by Dagon.

So far, my bets would be on amoral force who’ll be a sort of moral blank slate when he’s born, right?

But then Dabb in the finale pulls out the paradise card. “I saw a world without pain or hunger or want. I saw the world that this child... that your child... will create. And it is a world without fear and without suffering and without hate. I saw paradise.”

Paradise is never a good word in the show. It’s always associated to a lack of free will. It’s a big red flag! By all means, we’re supposed to be “oh no” about this. So now we’re supposed to believe the baby is much more complex than an amoral force who goes on baby instinct - mom safe good, mom unsafe bad - but has a pretty specific idea of the world and how he wants the world to be. Or that’s not about the baby at all, but about Cas, what Cas wants the world to be, and the baby just entered his mind and did a “so, I can give you want you want”, which is possibly worse.

In The Bad Place, Jack plants a vision of, presumably, worlds that the other dreamwalker, Derek, visited, which Kaia had previously called “paradises”. While this could simply be what ostensibly is - Jack showing her words that dreamwalking can give you access to - the sudden change in Kaia’s attitude is sort of disquieting.

Of course, the show never actually went through that path. Jack never actually brought what Cas said he saw in his vision. But it’s hard to discuss the finale because it simply does not work like a normal Supernatural episode, so we’re kind of left in a limbo state where we don’t actually have a Supernatural ending that makes sense.

But Cas’ attitude towards Jack always tasted kind of off. He suddenly had “faith” in the unborn kid and always kept this faith in Jack changing the world for the better/saving the world, as he states in Gimme Shelter. Many have pointed out how he basically went from directionless and depressed to suddenly focused on a sort of savior figure in a way that kind of resembles someone getting sucked into a cult or something like that.

Bad writing? Different writers interpreting the story in different ways? We’re supposed to see Jack as Cas’ child, but that’s kind of ambiguous. You love your child, you don’t have “faith” in your child.

Also, it’s sort of icky that he “discovered” his purpose in life in becoming a father. That’s... not really a good thing. You can love your children and adore being a parent and be an extremely devoted parent, but I wouldn’t really use words like purpose in relation to parenthood. In general, I’m not a fan of talking about a life purpose. In Cas’ case, especially, we’re supposed to believe that he was depressed because he couldn’t find a way to make himself... useful to the world? Because heaven was in shambles, earth was a mess, Lucifer, the Darkness, enemies stronger than him, blah blah, and he couldn’t really find a way to fix any of those problems.

That’s wrong. Cas should have never replaced that sense of being useless with a way of being useful (being Jack’s father, guiding him). Sure, it’s good to have something “useful” to do in your life, you gotta have something constructive in your life to feel fulfilled, but that’s not the point here. The point would be that Cas figured out that he had an inherent value regardless of whether use he could have for heaven or the Winchesters. He didn’t have to be “useful” to Dean or to heaven. He just needed to be.

Jack was written as the deus ex machina that fixed Cas’ depression, but Cas’ depression didn’t need a deus ex machine, it needed Cas to be loved and reassured that he had inherent value as a person regardless of what he could offer in practical terms to a cause.

In a show where destiny is the big bad, they associated Jack to the concept of destiny and said it was a good thing. So, which was supposed to be true?

#my spn thoughts #spn #the jack brainwashing conundrum #*lucifer voice* ...you always end here #lol #anon

[thegreenalien]

You should do all of them questions and 90 is true

I love you!!!!

1. Favorite instrument?

I work at a music store u can’t just ask me this. When my coworkers play it’s the saxophone or the flute, when the boys in the repair shop are testing repairs and they harmonize with each other or try to outplay one another it’s the bassoon or the trombone or whatever they’re fixing at the moment. When I hear 🎺 give his lesson on Wednesday afternoons it’s the trumpet, and when I think about middle school it’s the clarinet, the flute, the French horn. When I hear the nutcracker pas des deux is the oboe and when I hear edith piaf l’accordeoniste it’s the remarkable human voice. Really my favorite instrument is all of them, it just depends.

2. Favorite fic trope? Mutual pining 🥺

3. Sport you played for the longest amount of time? LMAO I wasn’t a sporty kid but I did ballet

4. Shoe size? 10-11

5. Most recent (good) dream? Uhh I had a dream last night about my coworker 🎹 it wasn’t bad though I can’t really remember what it was about

6. Last person in your DMs? smugg

7. Can you do a handstand? Nooo nooo lmaoo nooooo

8. Unpopular food opinion I don’t like oranges or red meat

9. Conspiracy you believe in? There’s some kind of weird weather dome in my hometown around the military base that makes most storms pass around us

10. Is your hair its natural color/style? Most of it is I dyed the bottom layer of my hair tho so it’s blonde rn

11. state a useless fact all that’s coming to mind is outright lies rn hold on. The inventor of pringles is buried in a pringles can that’s so fucking nasty omg

12. most interesting gossip you’ve heard? Idk I don’t really care for gossip uhhhh have u heard tho rin dippindogs is a huge gay hah she uhh she like men AND women lmao gaaay gaaaay

13. Middle name? Carolyn

14. Sexuality? Bisexual

15. Amount of sleep you got last night? Idk actually I think like 9-10 hrs tho I slept in until 11

16. Opinion on ice cream cake? Tasty!!!

17. Opinion on (cup)cake frosting? It’s depends buttercream is usually too sweet for me in large amounts so I prefer whipped cream frosting

18. Last board game you played? Idk??? We played hunt a killer tho last Thursday me n my family I guess that counts kinda

19. Project you want to start? I need ideas first baby

20. Project you’re working on right now? HAHAHAHAHAHA

21. TV show you’re watching? nothing rn I just rewatch bojack a lot if I watch anything

22. Last movie you watched? Lego batman I think

23. Ever left anon hate? Not legit hate

24. Ever left anon love? Yes all the time. Sometimes to strangers it’s my favorite thing to do

25. Best Disney movie? The princess and the frog

26. Best Pixar movie? Soul or Up I can’t decide

27. Best Star Wars? Um. Empire strikes back

28. Last thing you consumed? Fuit gumy

29. NoTP? Idk I don’t really hate ships unless they’re gross like pedophilic gross

30. story behind your (nick)name? When I was a fetus my great grandfather had a dream that my name should be Carolyn Marie but my parents were huge dweebs so they named me Marina after the actress of Deanna Troi in Star Trek. Idk about my nickname ive just always been Rina/Rin as long as I can remember

31. ice cream order? Lately it’s lemon sorbetto I know it’s SO high in sugar but I love it

32. describe your blog in <5 words I love you

33. how many blogs do you follow? 436

34. Describe your voice it depends usually I sound like a sick child but my customer service voice is really pleasant

35. Describe your smile it’s cute :)

36. What is the place you live known for? LMAOOO LMAO we have a military base nearby and like. I could go on abt that one but also like. There’s a lot of gang violence and a lot of the other consequences of poverty. People from the cities around us see us as “””ghetto””” or violent but it’s just. It’s more than that it’s always more than that. And idk what else there’s nothing really particularly special about this town except that we’re all here and not anywhere else

37. What is the place you’re originally from known for? (if they’re different)

38. pronouns? she/any idc

39. Languages you speak? English

40. first friend you made through tumblr? Idk. I probably don’t talk to them anymore :(

41. Person on tumblr you know in real life? my brother

42. First dog breed you think of shih tzu I have 2 next to me rn

43. room wall color? Purble!!!! The paint color is called grape juice that’s why I picked it!!!

44. Song that’s stuck in your head right now? It’s tricky to rock a rhyme to rock a rhyme that’s right on time it’s trickyyyyy

45. Favorite number? 5, 34

46. Color you associate with your name? Red

47. Favorite jolly rancher flavor?watermelon

48. Pets? 2 dogs rocket and groot and 4 cats loki danni who r from the same litter and we raised from kittens, miss kitty who we adopted from a shelter after my boy blue moon passed away and ben (his real name is Kylo Ren thanks to my mom but I refuse to call him that) he is my little baby and he has 7 toes on his front paws

49. Collections? Hot wheels

50. Character outside of your fandom you’d marry? Girl what lmaooo idk

51. Character outside of your fandom you’d kill? That’s mean :(

52. Have you met any celebrities? NO thank god id have to kill on sight

53. Favorite time period in history? Itslian Renaissance & Romantic Era

54. What time is it right now? 2:35 am oops

55. History or future? Future but like . A good one. Or prehistory

56. Space or ocean? Space

57. Fears? Abandonment

58. Command + v and post. It’s this list of questions u don’t want that

59. Favorite season? Spring

60. Describe your aesthetic. Messy just a mess, neon and old buildings and things, antiques, countryside if there weren’t so many trump pence flags still lmaoo give uppp give up, nature just al of nature and space and places humans can’t touch and places they used to touch but can’t anymore

61. MBTI? Infp but I haven’t taken it in a few years

62. What’s your relationship with your family like? Normal.

63. “Biggest fan” in your tumblr activity? I’m in mobile hold on acc to tumblr it’s akky

64. Favorite musical? Sweeney todd

65. Comfort book? Idk how to read 💔💔💔 wuthering heights tho

66. Comfort movie? Whisper of the heart

67. OTP? Girl idk

68. BroTP? Joey and Tristan yugioh

69. AUs or canon compliant? Canon ig idk

70. Opinion on the person who’s sending the ask? It’s an anon!! But I love them

71. FMK + 3 characters anon didnt leave any characters and I was going to say something very bad but I won’t

72. Dream date? I’ve wanted to do this for a while but ideally it would be after we’d been together a while maybe even engaged or whatever, I wanna go to like a Home Depot or a furniture store and pretend to be married and looking for house paints and furniture and plan what our home is going to look like I wanna do that so bad. But idk for a first/early relationship date i really want to go to the zilker botanical garden it’s one of my favorite places, we could also go to the natural gardener which is a plant nursery in Austin I really love it there too and it’s not that far from zilker.

73. Relationship status? Single

74. Ever dyed your hair? Do you plan to? Yes and perhaps. Maybe

75. Dream job/career? Idk anymore I used to have big girl goals and I haven’t had any in a while. But when I was younger I wanted to be a game warden

76. Favorite band/singer? Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky

77. Something that makes you soft/that you find adorable? My cats

78. The first thing you would do if you won the lottery? Buy a house

79. Are you superstitious? Yes

80. Character you project onto? Shizuku tsukishima

81. Fictional character you’ve had a crush on? Vergil devil may cry. Forever husband

82. Celebrity crush? LMAO

83. Person on here you’d date? my mutuals

84. Person on here you’d marry? 🥺 my mutuals

85. Person on here you’d throw into the void? Smugg

86. Other social media you have? I’ve got a photography insta that I barely use and a Twitter that’s just nintendo switch screenies that’s it

87. Finish the sentence: Due to personal reasons, ___________i will be passing away

88. Bad habit? I find it rlly hard to say no or like to say when and why I’m upset I don’t feel like for the latter I don’t feel like I should bring something that’s upsetting me up because I know I’ll get over it on my own and I don’t really trust myself to be upset about rational things. Idk I’m working on it

89. Three things you like about yourself? I’m hot, I’m kind, I’m resilient

90. Ily and you deserve the world I love you!!!!! YOU deserve it too!!!

#askies #anonymous #long post / #thank u!!

[wiseabsol]

WA Reviews “Dominion” by Aurelia le, Chapter 12: The Seal

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6383825/12/Dominion

Summary: For the Fire Nation royal siblings, love has always warred with hate. But neither the outward accomplishment of peace nor Azula’s defeat have brought the respite Zuko expected. Will his sister’s plans answer this, or only destroy them both?

Content Warnings: This story contains discussions and depictions of child abuse, emotional abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, and incest. This story also explores the idea that Zuko’s redemption arc (and his unlearning of abuse) is not as complete as the show suggested, and that Azula is not a sociopath (with the story having a lot of sympathy for her). If that doesn’t sound like your cup of tea, I would strongly recommend steering clear of this story and my reviews of it.  

Note: Because these were originally posted as chapter reviews/commentaries, I will often be talking to the author in them (though sometimes I will also snarkily address the characters). While I’ve also tried not to spoil later events in the story in these reviews, I would strongly recommend reading through chapter 28 before reading these, just to be safe.

Now on to chapter 12!

CHAPTER 12: THE SEAL

Alright, on to chapter twelve, “The Seal,” my favorite chapter of “Dominion!” This is going to be a much longer review than the others, so do be warned in advance.

 In regards to the author’s note, I do not envy the amount of research and posing you need to do to handle fight scenes in this story, but I admire how much work you put into it. I think the fight scenes really shine! The other points of discussion here are also interesting, namely regarding Iroh, who we’ll be seeing more interiority from as time goes on.

 Into the chapter itself! Oh lord, cricket wasps—I hate the insects in the ATLA world, I really do. So in this flashback, twelve-year-old Ty Lee has snuck over to Azula’s quarters and is watching her through the window, while hanging upside-down from a tree. God, I miss being young and able to climb trees like that with ease. But anyway, Azula is wearing one of her mom’s old robes during the hottest part of the summer, because symbolism and because Azula is sick as a dog. Ty Lee doesn’t know that yet, though.

 “Not at lessons, or meditating, or any of the other stuff Li and Lo said every time Ty Lee had tried to call on her in the past two weeks.”—This indicates that Li and Lo are aware of what is going on with Azula, and haven’t done anything to intervene on her behalf. Not that that would be easy, since Ozai is the Fire Lord, BUT—and this is key—in this continuity, they were Azulon’s concubines. Given that there hasn’t been mention of them having Azulon’s bastards in the main story (unlike with Iroh in “The Road”), this implies that Li and Lo had access to birth control. So they could have given some to Azula in the form of tea, or—since they haven’t revealed that they know what is going on to her—to Ozai to give to Azula. They would still be accomplices to Ozai’s abuse, but they could have done some damage control. They didn’t, though. Nor did Ozai. Maybe they all gambled on Azula being too young to conceive, which, A.) Is really gross, and B.) Is ignorant of them, since teenagers who grow up with good diets tend to have their first periods between ages 11-13. They should have taken more precautions. Or, you know, NOT forced Azula to have sex.

 I’m getting ahead of myself. Ty Lee is under the impression that Azula is trying to ghost her, and thinks something about Mai that I’m puzzled about: “Something about, they never said anything before—” I feel like this is about Zuko, somehow. Did he not say anything to Mai before he went into exile? I think it’s implied that they already had something going on before he left, given how quickly they got together after season two, but there might have also been a comic that went over how Azula got them together, and used their relationship to secure Zuko’s return home?

 “But those old ladies were Azula’s servants, right? So if they were lying to her, it was like Azula was lying to her….”—I think Ty Lee shows a touch of classism here, because she doesn’t consider the possibility that Lo and Li might be lying to her for their own reasons, or that they might be trying to drive a wedge between the girls. Heck, they might even think that Ty Lee is annoying and are just messing with her. She assumes that Lo and Li and Azula are all aligned, because she was taught that that’s what’s proper from servants—that they will align themselves with values of their employers and carry out their wishes. This might even be true in a healthy household, where everyone values each other and are pitching in to make their household a good one. But the Royal Family’s household isn’t healthy, and Lo and Li have more agency than Ty Lee gives them credit for.

 Also, it boggles my mind that Lo and Li, the concubines, are Azula’s servants. What in the world did the court think that they were teaching her? I can only assume it was things like cosmetics, fashion, and feminine arts like tea ceremonies, but goodness, weren’t there actual instructors for those, both in the capitol and at the Academy? Possibly Azula chased those teachers away, since Mai says in one chapter that Azula bullied their instructors at the Academy. But still, I can’t imagine no one raised an eyebrow at Lo and Li being assigned to Azula.

 “The other girls at the academy said Azula was a liar, even Mai did, but Ty Lee knew she didn’t lie about that. When Ty Lee was being annoying or childish or empty-headed, Azula told her so, she didn’t just invent excuses not to be around her. Mai said it was because Azula didn’t care what she thought. That was the only reason she was honest with Ty Lee. But Azula didn’t care what anyone thought except her dad, and she still lied to all of them….”

 We know that Azula lies and that she’s quite good at it, BUT I suspect that what was happening at the Academy was more a case of Azula being bluntly honest, and the people she was talking to not wanting to believe what she was saying. Also, with Ty Lee’s ability to read auras, she—unlike Toph—might be able to catch Azula in a lie, even if she can’t discern what the truth is based on her readings. So I think that Ty Lee has a better grasp on Azula than Mai does, while Mai is less likely to excuse Azula’s toxic actions out of sympathy for her.

 “She shouldn’t say goodbye to her friend while she was thinking all these unkind thoughts that probably—definitely—weren’t even true.”—She’s such a sweetheart. This is the chapter that swayed me to the Azula and Ty Lee ship.

 “Azula didn’t even know she was out here, Ty Lee realized. But she was practically impossible to sneak up on—“—Because she’s sick, Ty Lee. But also, it’s depressing that Azula is constantly on her guard.

 “Azula must not know Li and Lo turned her away, or she wouldn’t ask that.”—Told you, Ty Lee. They have their own agendas.

 Ty Lee discusses how Azula’s aura has appeared to her in the past, including this sad line: “Even forest green when she used to watch her mom with Zuko.” Azula has always been jealous of how close Ursa and Zuko were. I suspect that she wanted that closeness with both of them, especially her mom, but none of them knew how to connect with each other.

 “Her shadowed eyes were fever-bright, and only stood out more starkly for being lined with kohl.”—Azula, if there’s a day to not bother with make-up, it’s today. I know your little perfectionist heart won’t allow you to skip your routine, but if you’re spending your day vomiting and sweating, throw those cosmetics into the back of the drawer and don’t bother.

 “Ty Lee couldn’t remember the last time she saw Azula with her hair down….”—So no sleepovers lately, eh?

 It turns out that Ty Lee’s family are having her followed because they’ve made a match for her, and Ty Lee isn’t into it. Azula is similarly not into it and is confused, because it doesn’t seem to make much sense—Ty Lee is very young and has older sisters that still need to be married off, so this seems out of the blue.

 “Ty Lee hesitated at that. If she told her the whole story, Azula might try to stop her. She always agreed with her dad.”—There we are, it’s not her family’s idea, it’s Ozai’s. It’s sad that Ty Lee thinks that Azula will automatically side with Ozai on the issue, but it’s also a commonly held belief about Azula, and something that Ozai has cultivated. I don’t think that anyone has tested what might make Azula break from Ozai—the closest she’s gotten to doing so was when she lied to her father, namely for Zuko after Aang’s “death.”

 Ty Lee tries to deflect Azula’s questions by saying that her family wants to get her hitched before she runs off and joins the circus. And because Azula does, in fact, care about Ty Lee, she doesn’t laugh at the idea, but is instead hurt that Ty Lee is planning to leave—specifically, that’s she’s planning to leave HER. Azula is terrified of being left alone, now that Zuko, Ursa, Mai, and even Iroh have all left her behind without a backwards glance.

 “Ty Lee just glimpsed what looked unbelievably like panic on her wan face”—Ty Lee has never seen Azula panicked before. Or heard her curse before, which is what she does after vomiting into a vase. Ty Lee holds her hair back like a true friend. Somewhere, there’s a college AU of these two having a drunken night out and Ty Lee making sure that Azula doesn’t get vomit in her hair.

 “‘You’d think it’d stop after—’ She stopped then, like she only just remembered something.”—Azula nearly slips here, and I do have to wonder what she almost said. After the potion took effect and the cramping and bleeding started? I’m assuming that the expelled fetus would be too small to see at four months, but I don’t know enough about fetal development to know if that’s correct, and I don’t want to look it up.

 Ty Lee tries to ask her what she’s sick with, which Azula deflects. When thinking about what Azula could have said that she was sick with, I did wonder if Azula would have gone through a poison training regime at some point—been exposed to increasing doses of X and Y poisons to build up an immunity to them? Of course, this would have to be done under the supervision of a trusted doctor, and who knows if Ozai would trust a doctor enough for that.

 “A pulpy mash of what might have been crushed leave, shredded stems, and petals lavender and yellow”—I believe Azula has a double-dose of tansy and pennyroyal here. She also heats up her own tea, which I believe Iroh does too, suggesting that she has equally fine control over her firebending. Zuko, I think, is implied to overheat the water, making for bitter tea.

 “‘Just a miscalculation,’ Azula said almost to herself, and Ty Lee heard how she paused over the world, like it wasn’t her own.”—This plays into a couple of things. Azula has a deep fear of making mistakes, in large part due to being raised by an abusive parent who wouldn’t accept anything less than perfection, but also by the trauma of how own his mistakes have physically and psychologically affected her. It also adds another trigger to why Azula blew up at Mai at the Boiling Rock. Not only was she betrayed and abandoned by Mai, but Mai unintentionally reminded her of the pain from a past miscalculation.

 “dumped a heaping spoonful of some off-white powder into the cup and stirred”—I wonder what this was?

 When Ty Lee points out that Azula’s medicine doesn’t seem to be working, Azula says, “‘It just needs time,’” and I want to sit her down and discuss the sunken cost fallacy, and how you definitely don’t want to apply it to medication. Azula mentions that she wonders if she’ll ever get the taste out of her mouth, and I’m pretty sure she’d get nauseous if she tasted it again, given how aversions work.

 “‘I’ve been taking it every few hours, by Fa—by our physician’s orders.’”—This is an ugly little detail. It’s possible that Azula’s “reaction to the herb” later in the chapter isn’t due to it having an unexpected side effect, but because she had way, way too much of it because she followed Ozai’s orders, rather than her doctor’s instructions. Which isn’t her fault, by the way—it’s Ozai’s.

 “Ty Lee wondered if Azula could heat her hand to make it a hot compress, like the warm washcloth her Nana would drape on her forehead when she was sick. That always felt so good.”—I doubt that Azula has ever had someone give her a hot compress, so she wouldn’t think to do this.

 “‘Listen, you don’t have to run away.’ She drew a deep breath, as if bracing herself for an unpleasant undertaking. ‘I’ll talk to my father. He might get your parents to back off.’”—It’s so telling that Azula isn’t looking forward to asking her father for help.

 Ty Lee admits that Ozai suggested the match, and follows it up with others way that Ozai has tried to elevate her family that they’ve declined. Azula puts two and two together and realizes that Ozai—who presumably already got rid of Mai by putting Mai’s family in charge of Omashu—is trying to do the same to Ty Lee. He’s trying to isolate Azula from her loved ones, both because it lowers to risk of their secret coming to light, but is also a classic abuse tactic: make sure the victim has no one but the abuser in their life, and thus no one else they can turn to for help and support.

 “‘They’re a cadet branch of your family, from back before Fire Lord Sozin.’”—I’m surprised that Ozai hasn’t found a way to get rid of them. Also, Aurelia, you need to read the Kyoshi novels, because I think you would dig the Fire Nation politics in book two.

 “She didn’t start talking again when she saw the look on Azula’s face. It was like someone walled off the last window into her prison cell…. Ty Lee couldn’t guess where that came from, when the princess was the most powerful person she knew. But it fit. Somehow, it fit.”—This hurts so baaaaaaad. But yeah, Ty Lee, you were literally the only bright spot in Azula’s life, and probably the only one who loved her for who she was. Azula is looking at a future where she’s alone with her abuser.

 And what does Azula do in response? She puts Ty Lee first. “‘Then you have to go,’” she says, because if Ty Lee doesn’t run now, Ozai is going to find some other, crueler way to get Ty Lee out of the picture, and Azula knows it. When Ty Lee hesitates, Azula lashes out, trying to drive her away. But what she says is rooted in her own insecurities about being abandoned. In her moments of doubt, I think Azula genuinely thought that Ty Lee was looking for an excuse to leave her, too. Even though it’s apparent that Ty Lee cares about her.

 “‘Do you think I don’t know we were only introduced because your parents were trying to betroth you to Zuko?’”—That is audacious of a minor noble family, not going to lie.

 “her fingers clenching like they always did at the mention of her banished brother.”—Proof that Azula is upset about Zuko being banished, even if she can’t admit it to herself.

 “This was the first Ty Lee heard of it, but she guessed it might be true. It was beside the point anyway. ‘That’s my parents, Azula. Not me,’ she insisted, approaching the white-faced princess. ‘You’re my friend, and I care about you. I’m here because I want to be here.’”—Ty Lee is so precious and Azula should date her. Alas, queer relationships are illegal in the Fire Nation, at least during the time this story is set in.

 Azula continues to break down and is close to outright crying, which makes Ty Lee’s heart sink. We get this bit of info: “‘Don’t you remember how you felt when your grandad tried to arrange a marriage for you? I mean, I know you were younger, but…you wouldn’t want that for me, would you?’” So Azula was not pleased about having to marry her cousin, Lu Ten. I don’t think that info has quite been revealed yet—I think Ursa thinks about it later—but that’s what’s being referred to here.

 “She climbed the shallow steps to sit beside Azula, as close as she dared.”—Even back then, Azula didn’t like being touched. That or Ty Lee is afraid that Azula will hurt her, but I hate that reading.

 “‘What I want doesn’t matter,’ the princess spoke with an awful finality. ‘It never did.’”—Holy HELL does this break my heart. I’ve also been there, so I want to wrap Azula up in a hug, even though I know she’d hate that. Also, does Azula know what she wants? What SHE really wants, and not what the people around her wants from and for her?

 “‘It matters to me,’ Ty Lee said gently, and reached out to lay a hand on her arm in reassurance.”—Ty Lee is trying to kill me with this sweetness. She’s such a good person!

 Azula continues to rant poisonously at Ty Lee, and what Ty Lee doesn’t realize is that there’s a strong undercurrent of self-hatred in what Azula is saying: “but it wasn’t worth putting up with me anymore [ . . . ] was it?” She fully expects people to leave her, and is now actively trying to push Ty Lee away, because then at least she can tell herself that she was the one in control of how their relationship ended, rather than feeling helpless.

 And why is that trauma there? Well, because of Ursa. “‘You act like you’re doing me some kind of favor, saying goodbye when my mother didn’t.’” Ursa didn’t say goodbye to Azula. That would have left deep scars on her, even if the rest of her family and friends were supportive of her.

 Azula then says something that would be unforgiveable for most people: “‘You act like you’re my friend, when the only one stupid enough to believe that is you.’” Azula knows she went too far, because a few seconds later, “the princess had taken one step closer to where [Ty Lee] still sat at the end of the bed, something like regret written on her bloodless face.” I suspect that Azula would have apologized here, but then she collapses onto her knees.

 “Ty Lee was on her feet and down the shallow steps in an instant, her own hurt all but forgotten.”—Ty Lee is such a good friend. She asks Azula what’s wrong, but Azula can’t even think up a convincing lie.

 It’s mentioned that one of Azula’s hands go into her robe to clutch at her stomach, and when she draws her fingers away, there is blood on them. She’s bleeding badly at this point, but the heavy clothing is covering it up. At this point, a servant comes in and tells them that Ozai has summoned Azula, despite the fact that she’s very sick. Ty Lee is appalled, but Azula insists on going. Azula orders Ty Lee away, but of course Ty Lee isn’t about to go now.

 “She didn’t even get to hug Azula goodbye! And what she said about—about not being her friend…. Azula didn’t mean that, right? If Ty Lee just gave her time, she’d take it back, she’d apologize like she always did before.”—I think it’s undeniable that Azula behaves toxically towards her friends at points. Hopefully this will be something that she grows out of, but that is probably going take a lot of time and effort.

 Ty Lee, hearing Azula struggling to get ready, goes to check on her. “[Azula’s] shoulders slumped hopelessly, and she bit her lip so hard she drew blood.”—This really makes you feel for her. She feels like she has to look perfect in front of her own father while she’s severely ill. It makes me want to punch Ozai in the groin. Ty Lee helps her with her hair, which shows that she’s also very brave, as well as a true friend. Ty Lee is so underrated as a character, I swear.

 “The blood was gone from her fingers, and Ty Lee started to wonder if she’d only imagined it.”—Ty Lee is going to have the worst time when she puts two and two together that she was there when Azula was having her abortion. Also when she learns what Ozai was doing to Azula. It’s going to break my heart when it happens.

 Azula then gives Ty Lee her royal seal, which the chapter is named for. Azula gives it to Ty Lee so that Ty Lee will be able to get whatever she needs on the road. This will also let Azula keep track of where she is, but Ty Lee doesn’t think of that in the moment. Ty Lee tries to glomp Azula, but Azula braces herself as if expecting to be hit. “‘We’re not little kids anymore,’” Azula says, and I’m like, “Girl, you’re thirteen, yes you are.”

 Azula’s rejection of the hug hurts Ty Lee, but Ty Lee nonetheless stays in Azula’s room to wait for a real goodbye.

 “And sometimes when Azula’s dad sent for her, she came back upset. She might want to talk about it…. She wouldn’t want to talk about it, Ty Lee admitted [. . .] But she might want someone to talk at her, about stupid meaningless stuff to distract her. Azula acted annoyed when she did that, but sometimes Ty Lee thought she secretly liked it.”—This is so sad, given that we know why Azula comes back upset. I also relate to the distraction tactic. My friends and I use it on each other all of the time when we’re upset.

 Ty Lee considers staying a few extra days to make sure that Azula is feeling better, which definitely goes against Azula’s warning—but then, Ty Lee doesn’t know that she’s in danger. Ty Lee continues to wait for Azula, even after it gets dark. “Every time she looked up into that dark immensity, Ty Lee thought it looked like a giant mouth. Like Azula slept in a dragon’s maw.”—Oh look, a metaphor!

 In the middle of the night, Ozai comes into Azula’s room in a rage and starts destroying her changing screen, which is another abusive action—ruining her belongings in his anger, rather than anything belonging to him—and is probably also a metaphor, since the screen could represent her privacy.

 Ozai quickly realizes that Ty Lee is in the room and reigns himself in, though he’s still radiating rage, and Ty Lee knows that he could hurt her: “And Ty Lee knew a moment of blinding terror, when she imagined his big hands doing to her what they did to the screen….” She actually does think that he’s going to hit her at one point.

 He interrogates her on why she’s there, and Ty Lee thinks about how he and Zuko have the same eyes. It draws to mind that Zuko actually has the same explosive anger as Ozai, though he, at least, has the excuse of youth. Ty Lee, brave as she is, questions Ozai about where Azula is, and doesn’t buy the explanation he gives her.

 “‘She is a prodigy [ . . . ] My perfect girl….’ Something in his voice made Ty Lee’s eyes go wide. He talked about Azula like—like maybe she wasn’t those things anymore. Like something bad happened to her….”—Woof. First, she shouldn’t have to be perfect. Second, what’s happening to Azula is your fault, Ozai, not hers.

 “‘She will sit the Burning Throne one day, with the world for her dominion.’”—Title drop! “‘Nothing will divert her from that goal. Nothing [ . . . ] and no one.’”—What if Azula has different dreams, Ozai? What if she does something wild like fall in love? What is SHE wants to join a circus? Cirque Du Soleil, maybe!

 In any case, Ty Lee doesn’t get the hint that Ozai is talking about her, or that he sees Ty Lee as a distraction to Azula. Namely, a distraction from him and his ambitions.

 “Ty Lee spotted two servants halfway down the length of it. They scrubbed at a dark stain on the tile floor, working on hands and knees with their heads together, whispering. They fell silent immediately on spotting the Fire Lord, and redoubled their efforts, eyes fixed determinedly on their work and not on the young girl he led by the arm down a side passage.”—Oh, they absolutely know what’s going on with Azula. That he’s dragging another young girl down a hallway is not a good look for him, either.

 Ozai shoves Ty Lee off onto a guard to escort out of the palace. The guard, to his credit, is gentle with her. Once outside, Ty Lee considers trying to go back inside, wanting to prove to Azula that they’re friends. However, she heeds Azula’s warning instead, which likely saves her life, since Ozai would done something terrible had she ignored his threats. She would have become a security risk once she knew the truth, after all, and it’s not like she’s her family’s heir.  

 We flash forward to the present day, with Ty Lee reminiscing on what happened afterwards. Ty Lee wrote to Azula, but I strongly suspect that Azula burned the letters after reading them, and didn’t send letters back because she was worried that someone might use them to track Ty Lee down. That and she was pretending that Ty Lee had stolen from her, so no sense in acting too chummy. Also, Azula is Ty Lee’s “first and oldest friend,” which is cute and probably implies the same thing right back at Ty Lee.

 Ty Lee thinks about how Azula’s aura was different when they met again, and how Zuko’s was the same color for a while. She noticed that Azula was cold and lying all of the time (her aura colors meaning, “fear of the future, self-expression, or telling the truth,” “struggling to maintain control,” “anger,” and “survival-oriented”), and was getting worse and worse mentally, especially after Zuko left again. Eventually, it was so bad that Ty Lee was scared of her….

 But because Ty Lee is a saint, they reconnected at the asylum. When Ty Lee shows her the seal, Azula has doubts that she’ll put her name to anything again, and I’m like, “Please, there is no story if you don’t.”

 “Azula didn’t think she would ever get out of the asylum [ . . . ] Zuko refused to even consider releasing her. He would see she wasn’t crazy anymore if he just talked to her, but Zuko wouldn’t even see her. Yeah, Ty Lee knew they had a bad history, but wasn’t it a Fire Lord’s job to take care of all his subjects, even the ones he didn’t like? It made her mad just thinking about it, about him. Why wouldn’t he listen? Didn’t he care?”—Well for one thing, Ty Lee, if Zuko lets Azula out of the asylum, she’ll have to stand trial. She’ll also no longer be under his control, which he cares about much more than Azula herself.

 “Azula said not to come back for her birthday, but she didn’t say when to come back. And Ty Lee was left wondering if the answer was, well…never. No. Azula was her friend. She was as much, and meant it.”—So good to see someone having faith in Azula! You go, Ty Lee!

 In the present day, the other Kyoshi Warriors all know that Azula has escaped the asylum, but no one has told Ty Lee.

 “her skirts falling to cover the linen pantalettes most Kyoshins hadn’t even know were part of the uniform, until Ty Lee arrived.”—This is very funny, given what it implies about Ty Lee’s love of acrobatics.

 Aww, Azula is wearing her hair in a braid like Ty Lee taught her. I know it’s more practical for her long hair, but it’s also sweet (and smart, not wearing it in the traditional Fire Nation topknot).

 Ty Lee, our sweet summer child, thinks that Zuko let Azula go. “Azula frowned, and a guardedness stole over her face. For once, she looked more sad than angry at the mention of her brother.”—That stings. But the two go inside to discuss Azula’s escape more, since Azula quickly establishes that she broke herself out.

 Ty Lee’s house is a mess, because of course it is, but Azula doesn’t actually mind—probably too tired to. “Ty Lee stared. Since when was Azula fine with messy surroundings? She was such a neat-freak even when they were kids that she cleaned Ty Lee’s room unprompted practically every time she came over. One of the lesser-known benefits of having the princess for a friend.”—This is rather funny. I would also not be surprised if, in a modern setting, Azula was diagnosed with some form of OCD, given this sort of behavior.

 Azula is very chill and polite during this visit—you can see how much she’s grown when contrasting this to how she treated Ty Lee in the flashback—and perks up at the thought of food. Ty Lee starts to make breakfast, thinking about what Azula’s escape might mean. We get more about how the Kyoshi Warriors are still bitter at Azula, and how Ty Lee sticking up for Azula drove a wedge between her and the others. “Four years, and it was like they didn’t trust her at all!”—Probably because they don’t, where Azula is concerned.

 “And she would do just about anything for Azula. Anything but hurt another friend. She drew that line at the boiling Rock, and for all her doubts, Ty Lee didn’t think the princess would cross it again.”—Good, Ty Lee, I’m glad that you’ve set a boundary. Though you might want to be more worried about Mai now, since she would benefit from Azula being hurt or killed, and is still in demonizing Azula mode.

 Apparently, back when they were travelling together, Azula would start the campfire and then do firebending practice, rather than helping cook or set up camp, which was self-centered of her. There’s a faint echo of this set-up here, though it’s happening in Ty Lee’s home, and Azula stays put this time.

 Ty Lee asks when Azula escaped, and Azula admits that it was on her birthday—Ty Lee had visited two days before—and Ty Lee asks her a piercing question about why she didn’t want Ty Lee there for it: “Was it because—you didn’t want to make me choose again? Or because [ . . . ] you didn’t think I’d choose you?”

 Azula admits that there was some of both reasons in there, which Ty Lee is hurt by. “Azula had issues with trust, she knew that. But she still couldn’t help thinking, It’s like nobody trusts me at all! All she wanted was for everyone to like her. Was that so much to ask?”—This is self-centered of Ty Lee, but I’m amused by how this quote ends. No, Ty Lee, not everyone is going to like you, and that’s okay. It sucks, but that’s just how life is. But she’s what, eighteen, so of course that will take some time for her to internalize. Even though I, personally, do think everyone should like her, because she’s great.

 “‘I would have chose you,’ Ty Lee said softly, seating herself beside the princess to put them on equal conversational footing. She reached across the table and their empty plates to grasp Azula’s arm. ‘It was wrong of Zuko to keep you there. I told him so, lots of times.’”—This is such a sweet moment and strikes a great contrast to the conversation they had in the flashback. Whereas Azula lashed out in the flashback and Ty Lee wasn’t sure what to do, now Azula is being vulnerable and accepting Ty Lee’s comfort. It’s really nice.

 “Azula looked up with a sad smile. ‘I know you did.’”—My heart!

 Azula then surprises Ty Lee by asking about her mother, Princess Ursa, and where Zuko searched for her. Mostly he searched in the colonies (have those reverted to the Earth Kingdom or are they still Fire Nation-owned?), but lost the trail at the Great Divide. That place is such a curse to our heroes, isn’t it?

 Ty Lee thinks that this is a new adventure to go on with Azula, which on the one hand, I would love, but on the other hand, I’m offended on behalf of the Kyoshi Warriors. Is she just planning to ditch them? Also, from a meta standpoint, she’d be third-wheeling later on. Azula gently shoots the idea down, but proposes that Ty Lee be her ally among her enemies. Not a spy, but a safety net. Ty Lee initially thinks about how Azula once burned her own safety net, but then thinks, “She’s not that person anymore [ . . . ] She’s changed.” Which I do think is true. Azula has a lot of lingering problems, but she does seem genuine about making things up to Ty Lee. So Ty Lee agrees to the deal.

 And then the eggs burn and Azula vomits at the smell. Azula reveals that she’s been getting sick a lot lately, which she chalks up to the Earth Kingdom’s food being too heavy. Ty Lee is skeptical of this, and then puts the pieces together before Azula does: Azula is pregnant! Ty Lee is pretty adorably excited about this, not noticing that Azula is quietly panicking, and asks who the father is, which is a line of questioning that Azula shuts down: “‘He’s married [ . . . ] and even if he weren’t, completely worthless.’”

 Ty Lee’s exuberance will not be deterred, but Azula is very much not excited: “I’m on the run from the Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom both. This can only slow me down, and make it harder to hide. I should—“—Get rid of it. But Azula isn’t going to, even though she knows that it’s not strategically sound for her to be pregnant, let alone have a baby. At the same time, abortion carries its own, potentially deadly risks.

 “And an awful thought occurred to Ty Lee, one too terrible to put to words even. This whole time, she had imagined Azula falling in love with some handsome guard who spirited her away in the middle of the night, or a brave young general who always loved her from afar and broke her out of the asylum to restore her crown…. But she was pregnant, and alone. That should have been Ty Lee’s first clue something was wrong.”—Woof. She doesn’t think that Azula might have been assaulted here, but she does sense that there was nothing romantic in what happened. Also, her fantasies for Azula are so saccharine! XD  

 When Ty Lee asks for more info, Azula, blushing with shame, says, “‘I don’t—even remember most of it. It might have happened to someone else.’”—Confirming that she was disassociating in chapter seven.

 Azula starts crying and Ty Lee hugs her. Azula returns the hug and rambles about how this is another way for “him” to control her, and how much she doesn’t want him to have power over her, which Ty Lee doesn’t understand. But she’s supportive of Azula and tells her that she’ll get through this, because Azula always figures something out.

 Ty Lee takes Azula back inside and notices that her aura is a mix of colors, including lemon-yellow, which she thought happened when Azula was lying, but actually represents the fear of losing control. Which, you know, makes sense coming from Azula. The white with white sparkles is the baby.

 “Wow, Azula with a baby. It was hard to imagine. But he’d be next in line for the throne, after Lu Ten and Azula herself. Unless—did illegitimate children still inherit? Ty Lee should know this, she used to be a noble.”—Oh Ty Lee, sweetie. No, bastards don’t inherit unless they are legitimized by royal decree. Granted, it’s possible, even probable, that this child will be legitimized, though Zuko would have to be the one to do it. Unless Azula claimed the throne, in which case, she could do it herself. Which would be great. Upset that monarchal system, Azula, it’s terrible!

 “Or maybe she would have a girl! Ty Lee hoped she had a girl, one who looked just like her. Ty Lee wondered what the father looked like.”—Pretty dang similar, Ty Lee! Pretty dang similar!

 Kaede, one of the Kyoshi Warriors, comes knocking on Ty Lee’s door to tell her about Azula’s escape. You know, only a month late. Ty Lee yells to try to wake Azula up, because Azula is a light sleeper. Yeah, abuse trains you not to sleep too deeply.

 Kaede catches on to the fact that Ty Lee might have Azula around when she sees there are two plates set out, though Ty Lee tries to throw her off the scent by suggesting that she’s waiting for Shan Mo, her newest suitor. Oh Ty Lee, if only you were bi and dating girls too, then Kaede couldn’t catch you out on this lie. Apparently, the men take long fishing trips. Kaede insists on going in and checking the house out, but fortunately, Azula has already fled.

 Kaede and Ty Lee follow her into the woods. Kaede is shocked to see Azula looking like such a mess, and Azula, being a quick-thinker, loudly accuses Ty Lee of betraying her. It takes Ty Lee a second to catch on, and her response is hilarious: “You’re mean, and I hate you for ALL TIME!” Even if Ty Lee was an amazing actress, I’m pretty sure Kaede wouldn’t have bought this. Not when Ty Lee has been visiting Azula for years now, with her last visit being a scant two days before Azula broke out. The Kyoshi Warriors might even think she helped somehow, even if Ty Lee didn’t accompany Azula off of Ember Island.

 “Kaede had drawn her katana, but actually lowered it along with her fan to glance at Ty Lee in disbelief.”—Your distraction, Kaede, is why you’re about to get your butt whooped.

 There is some fighting, which is dynamic and exciting, but this cuteness is what sticks out to me: “Ty Lee couldn’t help grinning up at Azula, when the princess flipped overhead. It was always cool to see her combine firebending with the acrobatics Ty Lee taught her. It made her feel a warm glow of accomplishment inside, as if she were the one to pull that off.”—I blame you entirely for making me ship them, Aurelia. Stuff like this makes me want them to take over the palace and raise Azula’s baby together.

 Azula knocks Kaede out, and when Ty Lee goes to check on Kaede to confirm that she’s okay, Azula makes a sarcastic quip about what a relief that is. Ty Lee isn’t upset by this—she’s happy that Azula still has her sense of humor: “Most people didn’t realize Azula had a sense of humor, ‘cause it was kind of a black humor. But when she lost it, that was always a bad sign.”—Contrast this later to how alarmed a certain someone is by Azula’s dark humor, and how Azula reacts to it.

 “‘Listen, you’re going to be fine [ . . . ] You’re the most beautiful, smartest, perfect girl in the world!’”—First, be more bi, Ty Lee. Be more bi. Second, Azula just nods in response to this, as if she’s humoring Ty Lee’s views of her. She doesn’t actually seem to believe these things about herself anymore, if she ever did.

 Azula suggests that Ty Lee needs to be knocked out when the other Warriors find her, and Ty Lee reveals that she can do that to herself: “Ty Lee had ended up practicing that move on herself and volunteers of varying willingness a lot of times, before she got it right.”—Never change, Ty Lee.  

 Ty Lee doesn’t let Azula leave without a hug this time. Azula hugs her back, and also gives Ty Lee a backwards glance goodbye as she goes. How they’ve both grown since the flashback! Loving the parallelism here!

 As Azula heads out, she focuses on the negatives of being pregnant. She then has this truly depressing series of thoughts: “Azula took a moment to wonder if this was how her mother felt about her. If Ursa ever considered ending it, ending her before she ever came into the world. Her mother hadn’t wanted another child, Dad told her. Their marriage had already soured by then, and she was happy in her precious son. But Zuko was a weakling, her father knew it even then. So he demanded another, and her mother complied. She might have acted in secret to prevent him, maybe even did a few times before Azula…. But she could not deny him forever. So Ozai got his wish. And Azula got a mother who hated her existence.”

 First, Ozai had no business telling Azula any of that, and almost certainly did it to turn Azula against her mother and draw her closer to him. Second, this paints a very dark picture of Ozai and Ursa’s marriage—a picture we will later learn to be true. It shows the ugliness of a society where divorce isn’t permitted, and where wives are obligated to have their husbands’ children, regardless of what they themselves want.

 Azula then starts to consider herself as a potential parent. “Could she do that to a child? [ . . . ] Even if it lived—and with such unfortunate paternity, there was every chance it wouldn’t—could Azula give it that kind of start?”—The fact that she’s wondering this is a promising sign, even if Azula doesn’t realize it yet. It’s also relatable to any victim of child abuse who worries about mistreating their own children, someday.

 “You had a father who loved you [ . . . ] How many times did she tell herself that was enough? Enough that he wanted her, enough that he saw her worth?”—Azula, sweetie, if you have to tell yourself this, then it means you don’t have enough emotional support in your life, even from him.

 “This baby, if it lived, wouldn’t have even that. Her brother had been happy enough to take advantage, but he didn’t ask for this either. And Zuko never took responsibility for anything, unless it made him look good. His failings were always someone else’s fault. Usually hers.”—This is ugly, but also true about Zuko. I do think that he made progress in the show, between apologizing to Iroh and helping the Avatar. But that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t slip up and fall back into old habits sometimes, especially where Azula is concerned. After all, how would she know that he’s grown as a person, when he’s never showed empathy towards her?

 “She blamed the hormones. She blamed her brother, damn him. Damn him. Halfway around the world, and still managed to ruin her life….”—I should note that while I’m not a fan of Zuko’s behavior, Azula is just as poisoned against him. She’s not wrong about this. But she’ll have to deal with her bitterness towards him too, someday.

 Azula runs into another group of Warriors and thinks, “They fancied themselves as defenders, not aggressors. Azula counted that about as smart as fighting with one hand tied behind your back.”—This might be a viewpoint shaped by her being a part of a colonizing force, rather than a defending one. I also notice that as she gives them a speech, she goes into a stance where one arm is shielding her core. That could just be a part of the form, but it could also be a subtle, unconscious way of protecting the baby.

 During the fight that follows, Azula uses Ty Lee’s techniques against the group, but never aims to kill them—something that can not be said of the Kyoshi Warriors, since they’re using live steel.

 “Azula considered them coolly when they fell back to regroup, failing to see the appeal. But then, Ty Lee always did have bad taste when left to her own devices. It was probably inevitable this would extend to her chosen companions.”—Somewhere, Mai is snickering at Azula’s expense. But also, have a little more faith in Ty Lee, Azula.

 “A minute’s swordplay, and they forgot that she could firebend. It might almost be funny, if it wasn’t just sad.”—LOL.

 “The rain of blows was almost more than Azula could keep up with, her training with blades being nowhere near as extensive as, for example, her brother’s.”—I’m shocked. Azula is admitting that Zuko is better than her at something!

 “Never bring a sword to a firefight [ . . . ] Sokka’s little tart might have told you so, if she ever bothered to learn.”—I think this might be the first time that Azula has referenced a member of the Gaang (sans Zuko) by name. It implies that she has a little more respect for him than the others.

 One of the downed Warriors says that the Earth Kingdom is planning to take Azula’s head off, to which Azula sarcastically remarks, “‘Trusting to the competence of others [ . . . ] Always a sound strategy.’”—I see Azula’s point that trusting strangers to do a job for you probably isn’t going to work out. However, she should know the value of teamwork, given her journey with Mai and Ty Lee. Possibly she’ll really embrace the concept down the road, but we’ll see.

 “And for all that Azula could probably blast enough of them to ashes to make an instructive example, that would hardly contribute to her friendship with Ty Lee.”—Ah yes, making up excuses for why you don’t want to kill people, Azula. Ozai would not have hesitated.

 As Azula passes through town, I’ll note there are many men in the crowd, so perhaps Kaede’s comment earlier referred to a specific group of them. Also, as they start to chase after her, Azula does something very cool: “Azula [ . . . ] punched the sand. And blue flames flared from her fist like phoenix wings, surging to twice her own height when they seared down the beach in either direction, drawing a line of fire in the sand. Her attackers scrambled back with gasps and a few yells, when her fire fused the grains to glass and leapt high to hide her from view, fed by her chi. Even those who fought the Fire Navy would not have seen this kata, taught almost exclusively for exhibition firebending. Azula herself hadn’t practiced it in a few months, and was gratified that she remembered it so well.”

 It shouldn’t surprise me that Azula knows firebending moves that are for exhibitions, rather than combat, but I love the thought of her tackling these moves just for the joy of it. In a different universe, I could see her taking great satisfaction in winning firebending competitions, possibly while in disguise so as not to sway the judges with her royal status. In fact, Aurelia, let’s maybe add that to the Aunt Tam AU. Tam wants her to join an extracurricular at the Academy. Trophies ensue, which may or may not end up in Tam’s china cabinet (which, knowing her, never actually contained china).

 Azula took a tourist boat from Chin Village to get here, which is a fun mental image. She makes a joke about hoping that the villagers can swim, but of course they can. Fortunately, she manages to get away on another boat, but thinks, “Was it going to be like this in every town that recognized her? How tiresome.”—I don’t want to say that’s what you get for being part of an imperialist regime and conquering the largest city in the Earth Kingdom, but…that’s kind of what you get when you do that! XD

 Ty Lee wanted to be an actress at one point. I think she made the right call by joining the circus instead, since it’s much more suited to her talents.

 “It had been six years to the day Ty Lee ran away for the circus”—That’s interesting. Ty Lee left a month after Azula’s thirteenth birthday.

 “An invisible weight seemed to settle in her stomach when she thought back to that, the worst day of her life until she lost the Agni Kai….”—This is very sad. Also, she admits to losing the Agni Kai here, rather than Zuko cheating by having a second.

 Now we return to the flashback we began the chapter with. This time, it’s from Azula’s perspective, and she isn’t doing well. She’s dizzy, in pain, and she’s bleeding heavily, enough so that her thighs are already covered in blood, right after she’s changed clothes. She’s worried she’s going to leave a trail before much longer.

 “No one could know, no one could ever know, she remembered, forcing herself to take one step, then another. He said, never tell….”—This is horrifying.

 “How could there be anything still left inside her? He said that this would end it, he said that it was safe. Their own court physician handed her the prescription, and told her how to brew the tea.”—But did he say how much to take? Also, why in god’s name weren’t you kept in the infirmary? Sure, that would risk someone finding out what’s going on, but if Ozai hadn’t summoned Azula, Azula would probably have bled to death in her bedroom. The only reason that she didn’t die was because a servant went to get a doctor. Alternatively, Ty Lee probably would have gotten a doctor, but either way, sending her to her room alone was a bad idea. You need to observe someone who’s going through this in case something bad happens. Which, you know (gestures wildly at the blood).

 “It was too late for these doubts [ . . . ] The time for doubt, if it had ever been, was gone.”—Azula, I’m going to be straight with you. You’re dying. It’s natural to have doubts now.

 “Her father was waiting for her, and she couldn’t disappoint him. Especially now…. He had said it was his fault. He miscalculated. She couldn’t have known. He spoke so softly when he said it, he didn’t even sound like himself. But that it happened at all suggested a lack of control. She had to prove she was still in control, always in control. She had to prove he could depend on her in anything—”—Or, maybe, and I know this is wild, Azula, but hear me out: YOU DO NOT NEED TO MAKE UP FOR YOUR FATHER’S FAILINGS. YOU ARE A CHILD. HE SHOULD BE TAKING CARE OF YOU, NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND. IF HE WAS TAKING CARE OF YOU LIKE A PROPER PARENT, THIS WOULDN’T HAVE HAPPENED.

 Of course, I’m talking to a wall of text right now, but sue me, this part makes me emotional.

 Azula collapses, much to the alarm of the servant. Azula grabs her wrist and orders her to get a doctor, but the servant is “staring with eyes wide as saucers at something near Azula’s feet.” Which is blood, by the way—a spreading pool of blood. Best case scenario, the palace staff assumes that someone stabbed the princess. But in all likelihood, it’s clear to the servant what this is and what it means. If the servant is smart, she’ll say nothing. But I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a staffing purge after this, and I mean that in a very permanent sense.

 “A cold heaviness settled over her like a blanket of snow.”—I wonder how Azula knows what that feels like?

 “It was only when she was gone and the abandoned hall grew dim round her, that Azula let her tears fall. It was only then she let herself wonder, if her father intended this all along….”—Ooof, this hurts.

 “It was all training. She knew that, he knew that. But he had been very clear. No one else could know. They wouldn’t understand. It would mean the end of his reign as Fire Lord, the end of her place in the line of succession.”—Then why, in god’s name, did you do this, Ozai? Why take on this much risk? I daresay it’s overconfidence, since he didn’t foresee what’s happening to Azula right now, but good lord, he’s really something else.

 “He could always have more children [ . . . ] With someone who isn’t his daughter.”—God, I hate this. This poor kid!

 “But then…why send Ty Lee away? Azula grasped at the possibility. He must not want her to know what they did, but—But why bother to hurt you, when what he really meant was to kill you? She shuddered, bending in on herself. It occurred to her in that moment that there was something profoundly wrong with her life, if this was the only explanation she could find for it.”—There it is. For just a moment, Azula realizes what how nightmarish her life and her relationship with her father are. She’s going to bury this truth, but deep down, she knows that this is wrong. Even if it’s going to take her years to face it again.

 “She wished she hadn’t sent Ty Lee away. She wished it until the same image came unbidden to her mind, as when her friend revealed her father’s hand in this. Ty Lee with a scar like Zuko’s, smiling, still smiling until she winced. And the same pain blossomed in her chest as before, surpassing what she felt now as the sun surpassed the moon. She couldn’t let it happen.”—Azula loves Ty Lee so much, even if she’s bad at showing it. I think that if Azula had to chose between Ty Lee and her father, this tells us who she would pick, even if no one, even Azula, would believe it.

 Azula blacks out and wakes up intermittently in the infirmary over the following days. “She was in [ . . . ] the same bed they put her brother in when Dad scarred him, ironically enough.”—Yes, that sure is ironic, considering that Ozai’s abuse towards Azula is what landed her here, just like with Zuko.

 “Her father was never there when she woke. She wondered if he came while she slept. She wondered if she even wanted him to.”—Good. Be disillusioned with him. Don’t want him around. I think if you were in any shape to run away from him, I’d encourage you to do so. Catch up with Ty Lee and show off your firebending at the circus. I mean, I know Ozai would track you down soon afterwards, but I just want good things for you, Azula. Staying with him will not accomplish that.

 “He drew a chair up beside her bed and took a seat as if this were an invitation. Not that he needed one.”—I hate monarchies and patriarchies so much.

 Azula can’t even sit up from the pain, which Ozai frowns at. What a dick.

 “It was disrespectful not to look at him when he was speaking, but she couldn’t seem to do it.”—I wouldn’t want to look at him either, Azula. He’s awful. “And she closed her eyes at this, feeling as if the longer he sat there, the less air there was in the room.”—This is a bad sign, Azula, on top of all the warning klaxons and flashing danger lights.

 “She raised her eyes to his face and traced the line of his jaw, the arch of his brows, the slant of his eyes. All features he passed on to her.”—Ugh.

 “This was kinder than she could remember him being in a long time. It should have made her feel better. But it didn’t.”—She is so defeated here, and I don’t blame her for it.

 Ozai, being a despicable person, says that this never needs to happen again—not because he’s planning to stop her training, but because he now realizes that using birth control would be a good idea! Azula is understandably horrified. “She almost died, and he wasn’t going to stop.”—Run, Azula. Run away as fast as you can. You will die if you stay in this relationship. I suspect the only reason you didn’t was because of how the events in the show worked out.

 “He must have felt her hands jump under his, because Ozai tightened his grip, his hand grown hot enough to sear her skin. A warning of what she could expect if she failed him. Azula knew better than to betray any sign of discomfort.”—Aang, maybe you should have killed Ozai. I get why you didn’t. I get why the writers of the show didn’t want to go in that direction. But Ozai is a monstrous person. Even if he wasn’t trying to conquer the world and willing to burn whole chunks of it to accomplish that goal, how he treats his children is heinous.

 Ozai gives her a speech about why her training is important, and I’m sitting here like, “Cool motive, still sexual abuse.” There were other ways Azula could have learned this material—books, lectures from courtesans, maybe some experimentations of her own when she was old enough for it. Instead, the trauma from this abuse is going to haunt her well into adulthood. None of this is making her stronger, either. If anything, it’s left her vulnerable to inappropriate sexual advances, and has made it so that she dissociates during sex, rather than being present for it.

 “‘There will always be those who underestimate you, because you were born second, or born a woman.’ She knew he spoke from experience, and felt the same warm glow she always did inside, when he shared that with her. ‘Do not let it gall you as I did, my dear.’”—This would almost be sweet if Ozai wasn’t an emotionally manipulative jerk.

 “He stood then, and surprised her by bending to place a light kiss on her forehead, his big hand cupping her chin. He hadn’t done that since she was a little girl”—I hate him so much. This is also manipulative, though I’m not sure if Ozai realizes that that’s what he’s doing.

 “Your reaction to the herb was…unexpected. And Lao will pay dearly for it, once your recovery is complete.”—Lao vanished soon afterwards, never to be seen or heard from again.

 “I do not mean to harm you [ . . . ] I hope you never doubted that.”—But do your intentions matter when you DID harm her, haven’t apologized for it, and won’t change your actions to ensure her safety in the future?

 “‘I never did,’ Azula said quietly. That almost-smiled tugged at the corners of his mouth then, and she knew that he was pleased. It was the first time she succeeded in lying to her father. Azula felt hollow inside.”—Azula has lost her faith in her father. This isn’t a bad thing, though. What’s unfortunate is that she can’t and won’t leave him, even after all of this trauma. I suspect that she’ll think that she has to take care of him, because he’s a flawed human being who “needs” her. But something has broken here, and I hope that someday, she’ll be able to leave him behind. But it’s probably going to be a long time before that happens.

 And that wraps up chapter twelve! As always, thank you for the read, Aurelia!

 Sincerely,

WiseAbsol    

#Dominion by Aurelia le #Azula #avatar: the last airbender #Fanfiction #Review #WiseAbsol

[calunavulgaris]

I’d like to think that anyone who knows me knows that I am 100% pro-choice, but in case it needs to be said: I am unapologetically, completely, irrevocably pro-choice.

There are two main reasons for this, the first being that I have known from a very early age that I never wanted to be pregnant or give birth. The idea is beyond horrifying to me. The second is much less personal. I have never encountered an anti-choice argument that wasn’t laughably easy to dismantle. I’ve been vocally pro-choice for roughly 30 years now (thanks, Mom) and in that time one thing has become painfully evident: anti-choicers have nothing but tenuous, easily debunked “arguments” that are based solely on emotional manipulation, anecdotes, and pseudo-science. They’re also dreadfully unoriginal and repetitive. It gets dull, let me tell you.

But what the hell, just for fun let’s go through some of them here:

“Abortion is MURDER!”

Nope. Murder is a legal term with a clear, concise definition. Abortion does not meet the criteria. Go ahead and look that up, it’s pretty easy to find.

“Abortion KILLS BABIES!”

It’s funny how those who claim to be on the side of science (which is ridiculous on its own) resort to unscientific terms when their goal is to evoke a purely emotional response, isn’t it? “Killing babies” packs more of a manipulative punch than “a medical procedure involving the removal of fetal tissue.” Believe it or not, I sympathize if the termination of a fetus squicks you. I get it. Being that I’m pro-choice, I will always defend your right not to ever undergo the procedure with the same fervour I employ when defending the choice to obtain an abortion. That’s what it means to be pro-choice.

“The fetus is innocent and has a right to life!”

By definition, the fetus can’t be innocent or guilty, it is purely neutral. The “right to life” does not grant anyone the right to use any part of another person’s body for their survival, no matter how “innocent” that person may be. The person carrying the fetus also has the right to life and bodily autonomy, and having sex/being pregnant isn’t something one can be “guilty” of, as neither is a crime. If we want to talk about innocence, let’s start there.

“What about the rights/autonomy of the fetus?”

For starters, the fetus has no autonomy. Its survival is completely dependent on the person whose body it’s inhabiting. That person is fully autonomous and must consent to their body being used and occupied by the fetus.

I know this is repetitive, but it seems to need repeating: There is no human right granted to anyone to use any part of another human’s body, living or dead, for their survival. If you’re in need of an organ transplant, and someone has just died with the organ you need, that doesn’t grant you the right to take what you need from them unless they consented to it before their death. You don’t have the right to take their completely viable organs that they are no longer using if that person did not sign up to be a donor, and it doesn’t matter if you will die as a result. If I’ve been stabbed and am bleeding out, and will die unless given a blood transfusion, no one can be legally compelled to give me their blood to save my life. Not even my own mother. Not even if she was the one who stabbed me in the first place.

If no one has the right to a dead person’s organs or their mother’s blood, what right does a fetus have to another person’s entire body?

“You shouldn’t get to kill a baby just because you’re too lazy to use contraception!”

Please, tell me which form of contraception is 100% effective 100% of the time. Even a minuscule failure rate (based on perfect use) means that unintended conception will occur. I have personally met several people who conceived/were conceived themselves despite multiple forms of contraception being used. It happens. If someone uses two or three methods in tandem, I think they’re making it pretty clear that they do NOT wish to conceive, don’t you? And sure, some do decide to continue with the pregnancy (I think the best reaction I ever heard along these lines was “I need to meet the person who could get past all that!). Again, that’s their choice.

Yes, some people conceive because they neglected to use contraception, for whatever reason. Those reasons are no one’s business but their own. Having unsafe sex is not a crime and isn’t something people need to be punished for. More on that coming up in the next point.

“Abstinence is 100% effective! You made the choice to have sex, deal with the consequences!”

Electing to have an abortion is one way to deal with the consequences. It’s just one that some find immoral, or icky, or selfish. Thankfully, morals are subjective, and it isn’t a crime to be selfish or icky. Even if it were, using forced pregnancy (which the UN defines as a form of torture) as a punishment is unconscionable and inhumane.

Also, what do you suggest for childfree couples? Believe it or not, there are people in long-term, committed, loving, healthy relationships who don’t wish to have children. Should they be condemned to lifelong abstinence because there’s a chance they might conceive? Have fun trying to sell that one.

Consent to sex does not equal consent to pregnancy. Now, imagine that it wasn’t consensual to begin with. (This is where they like to bring up the statistic of abortions as a result of rape, because they live in a world where every instance of sexual assault is reported, and every victim discloses how they came to be pregnant.)

We don’t deny medical care to those who develop lung cancer due to their 20-year pack-a-day habit, or those who drink themselves into liver failure. If a drunk driver causes a collision, we don’t stand by and let them die from their injuries, even if the collision caused the death of others. But somehow, there are those who think a person with a uterus should literally be tortured and have their human rights revoked if a fetus is inhabiting that uterus. That is terrifying.

“What about the father? The fetus is 50% his so he should have a say!”

It may be 50% his genetic material, but it is 100% inhabiting another person’s body, which is why that person gets to make the final call.

Let’s break down what’s being implied here: If a couple conceives and the pregnant person wants to abort, they should obtain permission from their partner in order to do so. If he disagrees, they should respect that and carry the pregnancy to term. That doesn’t seem very 50-50 anymore, does it? I think it’s funny that this argument only seems to work under the assumption that the father would want to continue with the pregnancy. If he felt it would be best to terminate and his partner disagreed, would they still argue that his vote somehow carries more weight? I doubt it.

“You shouldn’t have an abortion just because pregnancy is inconvenient!”

“Inconvenient?!” Dude. A hangnail is inconvenient. Missing a parcel delivery and having to go to the post office is inconvenient. Your cat’s preference for hacking up hairballs on your clean laundry instead of the tile floor is inconvenient. To call pregnancy “inconvenient” is absurd in the extreme. Pregnancy, even under the best conditions, permanently alters a person’s body. I dare you to tell someone who has been through pregnancy and labour that it was merely “inconvenient.” Seriously, look up third-and-fourth degree tears, gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, abdominal separation, etc. just for starters, and then tell me it’s just inconvenient.

“Post-abortive women suffer from depression and mental illness!”

Find me an unbiased source to back that up, please. It simply isn’t true, the majority of people who have undergone an abortion report feeling relieved. Also, what kind of an effect do you imagine forcing an unwanted pregnancy and birth on an unwilling person has on their mental health? Hell, wanted pregnancies can take a huge toll on a person’s mental health, but I don’t see anyone using postpartum depression to argue against pregnancy, childbirth and parenthood.

“Doctors don’t know everything! I knew someone whose doctor said their pregnancy was unviable and they should terminate, but they didn’t and now they have a beautiful, perfect child!”

Cool story. I’m glad this person was able to make that choice for themselves and that things turned out okay. I’m still gonna trust the advice of someone who invested their time and money into getting a medical degree over the anecdote of an internet stranger, but that’s me.

“Infertile couples would be so happy to have your baby! Just give it up for adoption!”

I don’t know if you’re aware, but there is no shortage of children in need of families. There is, however, a shortage of people willing to adopt older children, or non-white babies/children, children and babies who are born addicted, HIV+, severely disabled/medically fragile... I could go on.

Getting back to the “Doctors don’t know everything!” point, it may be worth noting that I used to work in a foster home with severely disabled children. It was by far the hardest, most heartbreaking and exhausting job I’ve ever had. I have seen firsthand what these kids go through, how much around-the-clock care they require, how forgotten some of them are by their families, and how they are considered “undesirable” as far as adoption goes. I have seen how they suffer. I wouldn’t go as far as to say it would have been better for any of them if they hadn’t been born, but I fully understand if someone is simply not up to the task of devoting their life to caring for a child who will be completely dependent on them for everything for however long they live, which sadly isn’t long for many of them. I’m glad I did it, but not everyone can, and there is nothing wrong with admitting that.

All of that aside, adoption is only an alternative to parenthood, not pregnancy. No one owes you the use of their uterus to house a fetus you want just because you’re unable to make your own.

This is already longer than I originally intended, but I think I’ve covered the most commonly recycled arguments. The rest mainly boil down to “Abortion goes against my personal theological/philosophical beliefs or moral code!” and all I can say in response to that is that I’m so glad I don’t have to live by anyone’s concept of morality and am allowed my own. It’s pretty great.

I won’t be complacent, however. I have never been more terrified in my life as a uterus-bearing person as I am right now, and I know I’m not alone in that. We cannot allow our rights to be revoked. We cannot afford to lose the ground those before us fought so hard to gain. I will do all I can to keep that from happening.

If the right to our bodies isn’t worth fighting for, I don’t know what is.

#abortion #pro choice

[daybreaksbell21]

Let’s talk about Mom’s pregnancy stories.

I was born as one hella ugly baby with tan wrinkly skin, a wide face, and physical features resembling a male. I believe this must be the universe's punishment for my parents for their apparent dissatisfaction of my lack of balls. Dad was so disappointed he didn't even bother to look for a name for me and decided to name me based on both of my sisters' middle names, and my mom's literal reaction when she first saw my face was: "What the f*ck?" Then there's my little sister who everyone assumed would definitely be the miracle baby with a set of balls. Even my infamous grandma who had the skill to guess a baby's gender just from inspecting the morning dew thought wrong. This pregnancy happened due to a late night phone call from an aunt that went: "DO YOU WANNA GET RICH? IT'S A GOOD YEAR TO HAVE A BABY BECAUSE IT MATCHES WITH YOUR HUSBAND'S CHINESE ASTROLOGY." My family apparently was not familiar with the expression: "when you assume, you make an ass out of you and me". At least my Dad actually bothered on thinking up a proper name for her. At this point, my mom had resolved to trying out the newly famous artificial womb to program a boy. The urgency was, apparently, awfully real. My little sister was still a bald mess who would constantly receive comments like: "What the f*ck AGAIN?" from my Mom 'cause she stayed bald until 2 years of age, and i was pressumed a retard because I wasn't much of a speaker and was awfully nervous when introduced to people in general. Was it severe social anxiety that still haunts me to this very day? we'll never know. A year after my Mom's period came late, and my Dad had a a wonderful vision of pregnancy. She went to the store to buy 2 pregnancy tests which both turned out to be positive. In a now tired but still rather ecstatic state, both of my parents went to the doctor to check the baby's gender, which to their disappointment, refused to show its genitalia by constantly facing away from the camera. By the 7th month, my Mom was already discouraged and had resolved to trying for yet, ANOTHER fetus if this one turned out to have a vagina, which, to her dismay, did not receive much good comments from the family. "6 CHILDREN?! AREN'T THE FIRST 4 BURDEN ENOUGH?!" Imagine what happened when the nurse yelled: "*islamic praise word* IT'S HUGE!" She meant his penis, by the way. Grandma, who was my one true best friend at that time who never missed my birthday decided to prepare goodie bags on her expense to send to anyone my Mom wants her to. It's a good thing that the concept of the patriarch has not entered my mind at that time, and she remembered to come to my birthday the month before my little brother was born. If she had forgotten, all hell would break loose because I honestly thought that the one person in this world who would never betray me would be my grandma. They're both dead now, and I'am also fully aware of the concept of the patriarch.  

#shit happens #i'm the shit #good shit #grandma you were the best #i love you grandma #grandma's dead now #no more bestie birthday bash

[ouraidengray4]

Why Is It That Some People Just Can't Dance?

If you've ever been to a wedding, you know one hard truth: Some people just can't dance.

Sure, nobody expects a dance floor full of Fred Astaires, but is there any real, scientific reason why some people just can't feel the beat? (Sort of!) And can you fix it? (Yep!)

So if you fall more to the Drake end of the dancing scale (I'm using the almost-scientific Drake to Baryshnikov scale here), there's hope. Scientists and dance professionals have some insight on how to be a better dancer, even if you think you have two left feet.

The Rhythm Is Gonna Get You

Globally, pretty much every culture has incorporated some form of dance. That's because rhythm naturally affects us. When you hear music you like (or music you hate that still has a pretty catchy beat), your body wants to move in time with the rhythm. You might not break out into a moonwalk, but almost all people will nod their heads or tap their toes unconsciously with the music.

And that's true even as a fetus! Moms talk about babies kicking around when certain songs come on (my youngest sister was apparently really into that Chipmunk Christmas song in utero), and a study from Duke University found that babies can detect rhythm in the womb.

But it's not quite so simple. Musicians from Pharrell to Justin Bieber have complained about audiences clapping off-beat to their songs. As a person who's taught musical improv, I know firsthand that finding the beat is not always natural. And that doesn't even include all the dads on dance floors who look like they've never encountered the concept of rhythm.

For a small portion of people, this lack of rhythm has a name: beat deafness. A study from McGill University found that three percent of people suffer from congenital amusia (...which might become my drag name), and that means they can't perceive music through either pitch, timing, or rhythm.

An even smaller percentage of the amusical are considered "beat deaf." As in, they cannot find the beat in any form of music. The study found two such beat deaf individuals. Though they could keep time with a metronome, once actual music entered the picture, they were lost.

Are you (or your dance-impaired friend) beat deaf? Probably not. It's extremely rare. Though nearly all humans have some sense of rhythm, i.e., they can tap their feet to the beat, that doesn't mean they have a good sense of rhythm. Remember those bad clappers Justin Bieber yelled at? They were clapping to the beat—just not the right beat for the style of music. As soon as he stopped the song and corrected the audience, they were able to do it correctly. Sorry to reference the Biebs so many times: He just actually proves a point.

Yes, there are people with a bad sense of rhythm. From my experience, those people thought I'm just not good at rhythm and never tried to learn. But with a little guidance, they could find a basic beat.

If you're not inclined to trust an improv teacher/freelance writer on the art of dance, here's an actual professional's POV. "If you give yourself enough time and are dedicated to the learning process, even the most challenged can develop their rhythm at any age," says Preston Li, an instructor at the Beijing Dance Academy. Sure, not everyone will tap out Whiplash-style syncopations, but even the rhythmically challenged can find a beat… with practice.

She Blinded Me With (Dance) Science

So, if most people aren't beat deaf, and rhythm isn't the only answer, what else makes a dancing so hard? Well, Northumbria University and others finally decided to study dance because it's a form of courtship and attraction that's gotten relatively little scientific love—especially since people sometimes evaluate mate potential based on their moves alone. The studies aimed to find the moves that make women and men more attractive to one another. Note: All the studies in this section were based on heterosexual attractiveness. Sorry.

For women, dances that involved hip swings and asymmetrical movement of the arms and thighs were considered most appealing. So, maybe something like this.

The study concludes that hip movement may indicate fertility and increase attractiveness to males. Fertility does seem to get guys going since another study found that strippers made more money per lap dance when they were ovulating. So, ladies, if you really want to get a guy hot and bothered, let him know that an egg just dropped into your fallopian tube.

But what sexy moves can men do to look like Travolta on the dance floor? Well, according to Northumbria University, women liked "variability and amplitude of movements of the neck and trunk and speed of movements of the right knee."

Oh man, remember in Magic Mike where Channing Tatum moves his right knee? His knees were really the least of my concerns during that dance, but that must just be me because the study said it's all about neck, trunk, and knee. So, by that logic, this is one of the sexiest dances of all time.

The study also broke down the best moves for men in this video, while women can use this vid as a tutorial.

Now, maybe I'm crazy, but that doesn't really look like great dancing. The male avatar does the running man, for crying out loud! So we have to keep peeling this dance onion to find another layer of the bad dancing mystery.

Shame, Shame, Shame

As the good folks over at Northumbria University pointed out, dance is often used as a form of courtship. And even if you're not trying to find a life mate, there's a strong sexual component to social dancing. Guess what else goes along with sex and moving bodies? Shame!

Dancing, moving your body around, and trying to be sexy are all fairly vulnerable acts. Because if you do a bad job, people think you look stupid, you get rejected, and you wind up embarrassed. This fear of embarrassment often makes people stiff and uncomfortable on the dance floor.

Also, dance is not always embraced. There are tons of stories of high schools banning dances or putting "leave room for Jesus" type rules in place. And although Footloose was not a documentary, it was based on a real "No Dance Allowed" town.

Pablo Solomon, an artist and former teacher at the Houston Contemporary Dance Theater, says that a lot of his students came from backgrounds where dance and shame went hand in hand. For those students, "they not only have to teach their bodies to move in time with music, but they must often overcome the stiffness and awkwardness of suppressed guilt and fear."

Solomon found that overcoming the potential embarrassment of dancing led to the greatest growth. "Many were so tense and full of fear of embarrassment or being ridiculed that any attempt at movement seemed to await some sort of horrible repercussions," Solomon says. Once the student relaxed, they were able to find rhythm more easily, which led to better coordination and confidence in their abilities.

In my opinion, embarrassment and shame are the biggest reason why people suck at dancing. Or at least, why I suck at dancing. Now, I have a good sense of rhythm, took dance classes from first grade to college, and did musical theater for a living. If you need a pas de bourrée and single pirouette, I've got it (I mean, I'm not heading to ABT, but I'm not terrible). But put me in a club? Sweet Jesus, that's some sad business!

It's not because I don't know how to dance. It's because the idea of moving without choreography in a sexy way fills me with embarrassment. So, I look like an awkward weirdo (if I ever try to dance at all) because I'm so self-conscious about every move.

Now, I'm not saying that everyone is like me, but the risk of potential embarrassment often outweighs the rewards of dance for many people. So if everyone really could "dance like no one else is watching," we'd probably be a lot better off (and we wouldn't have to see that quote on a stock image of a girl in a boho dress spinning in a field ever again).

You Have to Practice

Another reason dancing is hard? Because it's hard. But Solomon has found that almost all of his dance students got better with time, no matter how bad they were to start. But it took practice. And most of us aren't going to go to a dance studio to get better for the one wedding a year we go to.

If you want to get better at social dancing? Well, unless the waltz makes a comeback, there's no place to go to get better. You have to risk stepping out onto a dance floor with a bunch of cool, sexy people and just give it your best shot. There aren't even moves to learn! You just have to kind of gyrate and move your arms asymmetrically until you get it right.

When you already feel like you're a bad dancer, it's unlikely you'll seek out a lot of opportunities to learn how to get better. Instead, you ignore it, drink a little too much, and do some crappy moves at your niece's Bat Mitzvah when your favorite song comes on.

Dancing is both perfectly natural to humans and incredibly complicated: It takes the ability to process music, understand rhythm, and have a good sense of coordination to be able to do basic moves. You have to do all that and not feel self-conscious about flailing your body around in front of strangers. Honestly, it's surprising that anyone can dance.

Still, there's hope for the dance challenged. If you want to get better in a hurry, just get over the embarrassment, practice finding rhythm, and let that right knee go to town.

from Greatist RSS https://ift.tt/2CD5T15 Why Is It That Some People Just Can't Dance? Greatist RSS from HEALTH BUZZ https://ift.tt/2O0omqh

#Greatist RSS