#because mania FUCKS its great

[lunaicfantastic]

so much (for) stardust reviewers don't shit on mania/ABAP challenge

#shut up anna #fob #this isn't that serious but also we get it your favorite fall out boy is pre-hiatus maybe stfu #sorry you can't have fun and enjoy mania sucks to be you lmao #like you can (rightfully) sing smfs' praises without being like 'its so much better than whatever tf mania was' like #its pretty obvious they couldn't get over the fact fob sounds different than they did in 2005 and wrote off mania on thise grounfs #rather than approach the album as its own entity #because mania FUCKS its great #like wilson? sunshine riptide? fucking stay frosty royal milk tea? last of the real ones? they all fucking slap #and ill die on that hill #anyway

[also-fours]

the hi-fi rush situation really bums me out.

we had this game that looked super unique, everybody loved it, it won tons of awards

and then it barely got any marketing, feels like it only got as popular as it did thanks to word of mouth and the initial shadow drop, was deemed a "failure" despite selling what many companies would consider a success back in the day, (because it didnt sell call of duty numbers, probably.) and then its studio got shut down

the studio was just starting to spread its wings, start making shit that could inspire their peers, other devs, to start making different things and experiment

and they fucking killed them

it's gone

i mean, maybe they'll make their own studio, i've heard something like that's happened a couple times with the yooka-laylee devs and sonic mania's dev team

but i dunno

as much as i love games like spider-man and god of war (and i mean literally just those two, like, anything else sony does aside from ratchet and clank im not into) i wish they didnt worry so much about modelling photorealism

the obsession with stuff like that is what's made game development so expensive and unsustainable at this rate

i know this is tumblr so the first reaction im gonna get to saying something like "i like spider-man and god of war" at least in my circle is "GOOD GLAD THAT IT'S BECOMING UNSUSTAINABLE FUCK THEM" but like. i actually like what these games had to say and what they brought to the table.

"spider-man had nothing to say it's just a stupid marvel game cash grab and god of war is a generic over the shoulder game"

if you're going to tell me something like that, kindly, please don't interact with this post

like, please?

thank you

anyway, i want games like that that...don't have to upgrade their graphics every time and. waste everyone's time.

genuinely with how they both looked in 2018 i'd be happy with them just. not changing the graphics at all

but uh. sadly sony knows their audience, haha

there'd be hell to pay if they did that

(i hate mainstream gamers)

and as for everything else that xbox and playstation are doing right now, i still want them to do something different

and microsoft killed off the developer that could've inspired others to do that

soooooooo fuck. what now. are we just gonna be stuck in this position forever.

probably not, i mean, again, with how expensive games like spider-man 2 have gotten to produce and the amount of people in and out of the industry screaming that you gotta CHILL THE FUCK OUT, we won't stay like this forever

it might get better

maybe when we get a new series of spider-man games they can have a visual style similar to spider-verse, wouldn't that be rad?

...i mean. judging by the leaks, they might already be experimenting with that...

or something like shattered dimensions have y'all seen that game? looks fantastic, go look it up, they made four different dimensions of spidey and all of 'em have their own unique visual style inspired by their books

sorry im getting off topic

im juat rambling at this point

i just hope people learn the right lessons from hi-fi rush.

and that the people who made it find a way through and can still make great things

thats what i hope for at least

...anyway at least we still have fortnite and its really fun art style--

#hi fi rush #video games #spider man #god of war

[eldritch-spouse]

The Princes

After a deal is established between Krulu and Miara, the idea of creating offspring becomes slightly less abhorrent to Krulu, for a multitude of reasons, some of which he's not keen to admit.

Miara will tell him a lot of truths he needs to hear, a couple of these being particularly pleasing, such as:

Siadar have vastly stopped watching Earth. This means the banished is not in as much danger as he believes himself to be. There's no need to be as subtle as he currently is being, because ever since Earth became the equivalent of a "no-go" zone, he's in little to no danger of being found. He's in an isolated, abandoned instance, inside a system vastly abandoned by siadar. Mother is only there because she's a deviant looking for her fragment;

He has her protection. In the very unlikely scenario that something did go wrong and both of them would be found, Miara volunteers herself to not only protect, but also sacrifice herself for the offspring and possibly buy all of them enough time to escape. This is not being done for Krulu specifically, but rather for Admin, the shard. Miara wants to proportion nothing but the best for you and is driven with all her being to ensure that you live the most fulfilled life. Does Krulu like that having Mother's protection soothes him? No, fuck no. But he can't deny that it makes the idea of heirs more feasible, tangible, less stressful.

Why is Miara so keen on kids?

Simple, she's a fertility goddess. As a former matemaker, and a creator, she can't help but encourage procreation amongst those she cares for. You (Admin) yourself are extremely family-oriented (if you weren't before, you sure are now) as one of your longest lasting wishes to be impregnated by Krulu and bring his heirs into the world. This desire is in direct correlation with your soul's link to Miara.

Other than that, she's also very excited to see a possible new generation of monsters be created, as she's come to adore the "heretical" diversity of this planet.

Why is Krulu so against kids?

Tl;dr: Trauma.

The last thing he wants is to be found again, to have the few things he's relearned to love be ripped from his grasp, decimated anew. He wouldn't survive that, he'd enter such a nauseating level of hysteria, of mania, that his mental faculties would never recover and he'd scorch everything alive. This planet, his kind, himself. Just thinking about actually going through with it causes him grief and panic deep enough to make his chest ache. Naturally, as his vessel, this saddens you to no end.

Putting that major mental block aside, Krulu is also saddened by the possibility of passing on his wounds and "blemishes" onto the offspring, which is likely, since the extended period of time inside The Null altered his core, his genetics.

The "test run"

Belo is the first who gets to put a baby in you.

For several reasons, mainly that Krulu isn't ready to do it until much later, but this test run with Belo only serves to sway him in that direction. The idea is implanted in your head first by none other than Miara, who is very good at coming up with mildly creative, kinda bullshit solutions to a lot of problems. If Krulu won't grant you offspring just yet, why not coax him with the image of you swollen by Belo's child?

This is beneficial for a lot of reasons, mostly that there's little to no danger involved for Krulu or you. Plus, it's something the higher finds himself very aroused by. The pregnancy will be smoother, and everyone gets a chance to orient themselves towards a more familial dynamic. Belo himself is extremely honored to have this chance, and exists in shock for a great deal of its duration.

After the angel hybrid child is born, your recovery is given priority, as soon enough, you'll be welcoming Krulu's heir. This pregnancy is already vastly different, and a touch more risky. (I've detailed the basic gist of it before.)

The offspring

Put simply, the siblings are as follows:

Adelo (Prince of Eden) -> Belo and Admin's child. An angel hybrid with some odd shapes here and there. Little about them is humanoid, mostly because angels are some of the most untampered types of creations genetically speaking, it would take a lot of successive breeding with lessers to make extremely humanoid angels. A very playful person, masculine-presenting, hermaphroditic. This little bozo originally simply wanted to goof off and was content only having to perform small errands for his parents, the clergymen and so forth. Upon teenhood, he's told about some plans for Eden, and how Krulu wishes Adelo would become its ruler within time. Ever since then, he has strived to make his parents' vision become reality, no matter what.

Adrul (Prince of Perdition) -> Krulu and Admin's child. Retains a lot of his father's visage, though with the odd feature of a centipede-like lower body. Has been somewhat quiet and serious since childhood, in great contrast to his brother, though he's not incapable of humor. The hybrid didn't like to feel useless and would take on any role necessary, no matter how foreign it felt. He takes his mission to heart and swears to convert every demon, or kill them where they stand shall they refuse to honor Krulu. Although he may outwardly come off as intimidating and heartless, Adrul has a lot more empathy than his brother.

As princes, it's safe to assume both monsters suffer from some degree of loneliness and stress, imposed on them by the missions they have been encumbered with. If only there was someone who caught their eye, made life more bearable...

#Adrul oc #Adelo oc #pinnie's art #monster oc

[thelocalscepticx]

the atlas paradox after thoughts

{SPOILERS}

- callum is so broken and i think hes such an interesting character to analyze. like the thoughts of 'if you could feel everyones emotions all the time, you would have to shut off your own or you would fucking shatter'

-tristan needs to get his shit together ngl

- NICO AND GIDEON FINALLY

- hc libby is a lesbian and belen deserved better

- libby is imo the most cruel and manipulative person of the six. it was true in the first book its true now

- tho we love a corruption arc

- ngl kinda hope ezra lives. like did he do shitty things? yes. should you kidnap ur ex to 'save the world'? probably not. did i disagree with some of his philosophy and reasonings.... next question. also the fact that i think that that interaction would be really fucking fascinating. (i just want to have him and atlas yell at eachother more so i can critique their relationship more)

- parisa is and always will be the queen of my heart. i want more callum and parisa moments im the next book because i think theyre so similar and seeing their banter cracks me up

- if libby and tristan end up together i will literally cry and throw up and shit my pants in rage they are AWFUL together.

- belen deserved better pt 2

- i think reina didnt do much this book (other than possibly draft a damn pantheon) so im hoping we see her research come to fruition in the next book

- suddenly i love dalton? like him and parisa burning it to the ground? mania? madness? im living for it

-callum x tristan supremacy. they remind me of those broken plates that you mend with gold and they become more beautiful

- does anyone remember all the shit callum said about the 6 in the first book?

"Libby Rhodes was an anxious impending meltdown whose decisions were based entirely on what she had allowed the world to shape her into. She was more powerful than all of them except for Nico, and of course she was. Because that was her curse: regardless of how much power she possessed, she lacked the dauntlessness to misuse it. She was too small-minded, too un-hungry for that. Too trapped within the cage of her own fears, her desires to be liked. The day she woke up and realized she could make her own world would be a dangerous one, but it was so unlikely it hardly kelt Callum up at night." (301)

"'Parisa is dangerous. She is angry," he clarified. "She is furious, vindictive, spiteful, naturally misanthropic. If she had Libby's power, or Nico's, she would have destroyed what remains of society by now...[she's here] to find a way to do it...Destroy things. The world possibly. Or control it. Whatever option suits her when she find it"'(305)

"Libby was a hero. Parisa was a villain. They would both be disappointed in the end." (300)

the way that all of this is being brought up again in TAP is beautiful

- callum is on his way to some sort of redemption/selfless arc i can TASTE IT and i crave it.

- everyone is hot. all the time. it hurts me

- blake is great at gaslighting me into making me think i understand any of the mathematic scientific bs they talk about at any given time

- theyre all so broken and in need of therapy

- i want callum to verbally destroy adrian caine

- i want all of them to succeed in their funky lil goals and become gods (except libby)

- speaking of libby- i think shed be a great villain

anyways. this series? owns my mf ass

#callum nova #tristan caine #parisa kamali #libby rhodes #dalton ellery #nico de varona #reina mori #atlas blakely #the atlas paradox #the atlas series #the atlas six #ta6 #after thoughts #ezra fowler #i love callum #parisa and callum are the loves of my life #gideon and nico are so cute #nico x gideon #tristan x callum #libby x belen #parisa x dalton #ace reina supremacy #novacaine

[bornetoblood]

Okay fuck it, Gehrman, Maria and the Doll Post.

Buckle in bucko cus I have lots of thoughts. This isn’t really evidenced or a lore post, it’s just a compelation of assorted Rat (tm) opinions on these three’s relationship and how it intersects with some of those delicious themes in my brain.

Gehrman, Maria and the Doll are, basically, about legacy to me- particularly Gehrman’s failure to secure the continuation of his hunters through Maria.

We know Maria as Gehrman’s apprentice, possibly one of a few but that is left vague, that he had a “curious mania” in regards to her that she was unaware of. This “mania” to me is Gehrman’s desire to keep his legacy going, his methods of hunting and the workshop (kinda like a parental figure trying to make their child a little them). This is reflected in Maria’s desire to gain strength through practice and her dexterity, not innate abilities.

They have a pretty wholesome dynamic of ‘mentor you trust enough to kinda consider your dad’ thing going if you ignore all the murder. Maria being separated from her Cainhurst family as she deliberately distances herself from them and Gehrman (who is very very family oriented to me) likes looking after people.

Maria’s acceptance of the First Hunter 2.0 role, however, runs up to the Fishing Hamlet Massacre, and then crashes.

The Hamlet and the events there forced Maria to realise the violence such a role entails. Additionally, I can see her putting two and two together about what exactly the beasts are here also. Unlike Gehrman, she doesn’t see the murder of these people as an act of mercy, and forgos her status as a hunter, throwing away the Rakuyo. This creates a divide between them and they aren’t as close ever again.

When the Healing Church gets going, they both participate. Gehrman does his whole ‘hunting from the shadows’ deal while Maria works in the research hall. They get into arguments sometimes about their different views of the hunt and its validity, and Maria’s depression progressively worsens as the Research Hall gets more violent and her crush gets slugs put in her brain. She is complicit in the Research Hall out of a desire to ease the pain of the patients and this compounds the guilt she’s still feeling from the Hamlet. This guilt, eventually, leads to her death.

Gehrman doesn’t take this very well. As a result, he gives up hunting and isolates himself; having failed in his mission to create a lineage of hunters, help Maria with what she was going through, and simply be an alright dad to her. He misconstrues Maria’s more masc presentation, her headstrong and dynamic personality, as an extension of the hunt and thus strips those qualities of her in his attempt to memorialise her.

Gehrman, foolishly, thinks that he alone is to blame for Maria’s disillusionment. He thinks that Maria would’ve been the most comfortable as a traditional feminine figure (he.... doesn’t know many women, only what he’s read in books). So this is what the Doll is- Gehrman’s attempt to atone for making Maria’s life miserable.

This is complicated when Flora brings the Doll to life to accompany Gehrman in the Dream; the Doll is nothing like Maria because they have been stripped of everything that made Maria who she was. Gehrman just avoids them as a result, effectively abandoning his wooden child without them having a clue why.

The Doll is not Maria. Although it’s implied they share some memories (or the feelings those memories evoke) and the Doll is put at ease when Maria is put to rest in the Nightmare, I see this more as Great One shenanigans than them being the same person. Flora animating the Doll with Gehrman’s memory of Maria is the most interesting take to me- he’s forgotten a lot about her and what’s left is someone unrecognisable with the same voice. 

And that’s where it stays. The Doll is an animated product of grief who unintentionally freaks Gehrman out and makes him feel sick and they have 0 idea what they’re doing wrong.

#TALK TO YOUR WOODEN DAUGHTER ASSHOLE #its just like frankenstein fr but like #really really really sad #okay #tw depression #tw suicide #the rat speaks #gehrman the first hunter #lady maria of the astral clocktower #the plain doll #moon presence #bloodborne #gehrman to me is emotionally neglectful dad who (at least with maria) was trying his.... best? #yeah we'll go best #the thematic link is the #almost destructive desire for parenthood and well #death + the cycle of abuse #gehrman makes the same mistake with the doll he did with maria and it upsets the doll #anwyay anway

[laguera25]

I'm going to clarify something, and then I'm going to STFU until something more than unattributed screenshots and frazzled mania comes out.

I believe something happened to that woman. What I don't know is if it was anything untoward. Maybe between the booze and the excitement and her Lexapro and dehydration, things just went wonky, and she went off her ass. Maybe it was innocent.

Or maybe it wasn't. Maybe someone did spike her. Maybe they did it to make her more pliant, or maybe they did to get people high and didn't realize that whatever they added would interact badly with her meds.

I believe Till made an asshole of himself and pouted when she declined to have sex with him. I believe he sulked and flounced off.

And that alone makes him a dick. It doesn't speak well of him that he was willing to have sex with someone obviously off their ass and then turned into a toddler when she said no. It makes him sound sleazy, predatory, and entitled. And sad.

But.

This woman herself acknowledges that when faced with her refusal, Till accepted it. With ill grace, it must be said, but nonetheless. He did not press the issue.

I do not believe Till, or anyone else involved with Rammstein and its satellite organization, assaulted this woman. If Till had wanted to, he could've done so under the stage. No one did, and the woman herself claims that her memory didn't abdicate its duties until after that.

I'm not saying she wasn't assaulted; and to her credit, she has made no explicit claims as yet, though she's certainly been dancing around the subject since she first showed her bruises, especially the finger marks on her ribs. FWIW, I think she got most of those as she stumbled about in a stupor she does not recall. The finger marks may well be from equally intoxicated people trying to help her up.

In sum, I think Till has brought this on the band. Whether it was an intentional spike or a bad mix of booze and meds, he still tried to have sex with a woman blasted out of her mind, and even though he refused, the very fact that he attempted to do so has ratcheted up the nightmare scenarios of what might have happened in her mind. The truth is, she doesn't know what happened after her memory peaced out, and likely never will, but because Till showed his ass, she's always going to wonder. And that's on him. And on the band for letting these parties go on under their auspices.

I know this woman is now claiming this was never about legal justice, which doesn't really gibe with her first post, in which she swore to get "her justice, but there we are. I think she realizes that any chance she had of collecting physical evidence has passed and has now shifted gears to a righteous crusade to stop the "filth and depravity."

I can't say she hasn't been without success on that score because allegedly, the next few Row 0 parties have been nixed or moved to an outside club, and Alena is doing cack-handed damage control on IG, begging girls to post positive party experiences with the hashtag, "Istandwithrammstein." Which, LOL. I can't imagine the band came up with that dumbass stratagem. She, at least, is on the defensive. And fucking good.

All of that said, this woman's credibility is still shot, and rather than posting every harebrained, "My friend snorted coke off Till's dick" story that lands in her DMs, she needs to stop posting manic IG stories and get a lawyer because by posting every bit of drivel that floats into her inbox, she not only looks credulous and crazy, but she's opening herself up to legal action I'm sure she can't afford.

*There is a difference between credibility and truth. While this woman might be telling the truth about what happened to her as far as she can remember, she has no credibility because she's tossed it in among patent hogwash and posted shrill videos of herself as a an avenging angel for Great Justice, which makes her look like a gullible, loony misandrist.

**She's not claiming explicitly that Till or anyone affiliated with Rammstein sexually assaulted her, but she's certainly insinuating that they've done it to others, and that's what might land her in very deep trouble.

ETA: And now she's dragging Richard into it. His nefarious misdeed? Sitting in the same room at the afterparty. 'Kay.

#rammstein

[booksandabeer]

Okay, so... Maestro

I know it’s the cool thing right now to shit on Bradley Cooper and his increasingly desperate attempts to win that damn Oscar, and at this point it feels a bit like kicking someone when they’re already down, but oh boy, he makes it so easy. Still, let me preface what I’m about to say by assuring everyone who might be inclined to think that this is just me piling on, that I truly, sincerely wanted to like this movie. It’s about Leonard Bernstein!!! Of course I wanted to like it!  

With that out of the way…if you already thought Bradley Cooper was a bit much in A Star Is Born, wait until you’ve seen him act at you for two hours in this never-truer-to-its-name vanity project in which producer Bradley Cooper produces director Bradley Cooper who directs leading man Bradley Cooper as he recites lines written by, you guessed it, screenwriter Bradley Cooper.

First of all, the movie looks gorgeous. It sounds wonderful. Everybody in the so-called “below the line” departments brought their absolute A-game to this. It’s a Vogue coffee table book come to life. And that is precisely where the problem lies: This is supposed to be a movie, but what it actually is is the epitome of style over substance. It is completely devoid of any meaningful insights into the man or the time or the culture it depicts. It’s not a movie about Leonard Bernstein, the artist. Which isn’t a problem per se—different approaches to biopics are perfectly valid. The real problem is that it’s not a movie about Leonard Bernstein, the man, either. It’s Bradley Cooper spending almost 100 million dollars cosplaying as The Great Artist—beloved by intellectuals and the common folk alike—that he so desperately wishes to be himself.

Cooper's performance is A LOT. From the many affectations to the sweaty mania that is constantly turned up to 11 to the extremely nasal intonation (that seems to come and go) to, yes, the stupid and entirely unnecessary prosthetic nose—he does The Most in every single scene. Now, you might say I’m biased by my recent love for Fellow Travelers, but still, what Matt Bomer—in a small part as Bernstein’s lover and collaborator David Oppenheim—does in one scene that shows him smiling through the pain of being casually cast aside by his lover, moved me more than (almost) anything Cooper does in the entire movie. They also share a moment later that is almost unbearable to watch because of the pain seeping out of these two men who are, due to a mix of self-denial and societal oppression, not allowed to (or allowing themselves to) live life as their true selves. Finally! Some real human emotion! That is the movie I want to see. And it is so telling that this moment of actual tangible humanity happens when Cooper finally calms down for five fucking seconds.

All that isn’t to say that there aren’t any scenes here that have true charm and flair; at times the movie even comes close to moments of true beauty and grace that could be poignant, even devastating in the best of ways—were they not ruined by some “eccentric” directorial choice, baffling camera placements, shots that either linger on forever or are abruptly cut short. I was practically waiting for him to turn to the camera and ask “see what I did there?” Yes, we see it. We see it in the fantastical dance sequences, the 40s noir inspired shots, the shift from black and white to color halfway through the movie, the classic 4:3 aspect ratio, and the many many many allusions that do not serve this story and these characters at all but make it very clear to the audience that Cooper has seen a lot of movies. He’s a student of Cinemah, didn't you know? Anyway, all of these things aren’t bad ideas in and of themselves, but he does not know how to edit himself (or his movie) and so it’s just all too much, all the time, and it goes on for way too long.  

Let’s talk briefly about the Felicia of it all. Briefly, because for all the noise that Cooper has made about this being a movie that is just as much about Bernstein’s wife and their love story as it is about the man himself, I could not tell you who this woman was any more than I could before I sat down to watch two hours of Carey Mulligan reacting to Bernstein’s genius. Mulligan tries her best but she’s really only allowed to play two modes: swooning with adoration or vibrating with repressed anger. That’s it. I have no idea who Felicia Montealegre was beyond her husband’s wife. What did she want her life and her career to be? Was she truly passionate about acting or was it just a fun hobby to pass the time? And what did she hope to get out of this marriage, which—the movie makes it very clear—she entered into with the full awareness that there were parts of her husband’s life and heart that would remain forever inaccessible to her? Who knows. I certainly don’t.

Despite all claims to the contrary, this movie, and therefore I must assume the man who made it, is deeply uninterested in actually exploring this woman’s inner life. There’s no small amount of sad irony to be found in the parallel of Felicia serving as a shield of respectability for Bernstein (not only as that, because I do not doubt that they loved each other, but it was certainly one of the reasons for why he married her) and Cooper using his supposed interest in her (and to a lesser extent his lead actress) all these years later as a kind of preemptive measure to ward off criticism that he’s only interested in the Male Genius.  

Finally. What’s actually worse than all of the above is that somehow Bradley Cooper managed to do the impossible: He made a movie about Leonard Bernstein that is both utterly exhausting and—the true cardinal sin—terribly boring.  

#don’t even get me started on the approach cooper chooses to depict bernstein’s sexuality #which I think says more about him than about his subject #then again pretty much everything in this movie says more about him than about the people it's supposedly about #but whatever. i'm done now. going back to bed. if this has 1000 SPaG mistakes and/or makes no sense blame it on the fever #movie ramblings #maestro

[chicgeekgirl89]

I Get it From You

Fandom: 911 Lone Star

Characters: Carlos Reyes, T.K. Strand, Andrea Reyes, Gabriel Reyes, Lexi Mitchell, OC Cousin Adriana

Rating: K

For @tarlosweeklyprompts Prompt #2: 5+1 of habits that Carlos picked up from TK and 1 that TK got from Carlos. 

A/N: I may have played a little fast and loose with it, but 🤷‍♀️.

Read on AO3

Charm

“I noticed you started wearing this recently,” Andrea says, reaching out to finger the tiny cross hanging around his neck. “It’s pretty.”

“Thanks,” Carlos says a little numbly, eyes trained on T.K.’s nearly frozen, lifeless form. 

“You’ve never been much of a jewelry person,” Andrea says, her unasked question hanging in the air between them. 

“T.K. wears a medallion around his neck,” he tells her.

“I’ve seen it,” Andrea says. “With his number from New York on it.”

Carlos nods. “He says it reminds him that he’s part of something bigger. That he’s got people to watch his back. That being on that crew probably saved his life, because even when he was…” Carlos hesitates, remembering that his mom doesn’t fully know how deep T.K.’s struggles with addiction have gone. “Even when he was struggling, he knew he had a responsibility to be there and help people. He never takes it off.”

“A good reminder of the support he has, then and now,” she says softly.

Carlos reaches up and brushes his fingers over the cross. “After the fire…everything was just so hard. I felt lost, I was kind of spiraling and one day we were out trying to replace stuff and I saw this and I felt like it kind of called to me. It reminds me where I come from. That I have roots, and a purpose.” He looks up and gives her a wan smile. “That’s probably a less religious answer than you were hoping for.”

She shakes her head, leaning forward to cup his cheek. “It’s a perfect answer.”

Pizza

“Oh my god. What the actual fuck are you doing to that pizza?”

Carlos freezes, pizza halfway to his mouth. “Eating it?” he says in confusion.

Adriana looks at him like he’s crazy. “Eating it? You’re murdering it!”

He looks down to see that he’s mindlessly folded the slice in half. “Mind your own business.”

“Um, you turning a delicious slice of Texas’ finest into that hot mess is my business.”

“How about I eat the pizza I bought and paid for and planned to eat by myself tonight however I want and you shut up?”

“Where did you even learn to do that?” she persists. “I’ve never seen you do that before.”

“It’s how T.K. eats his. It’s a New York thing. I must have picked it up from him.”

“Well can you send it back where it belongs? You look ridiculous.”

He starts to pull the pizza box away from her but she grabs on. “No! Okay! I’m sorry! You can commit pizza homicide all you want!”

He rolls his eyes and lets the box go. “It was so nice and quiet before you showed up here unannounced.”

“You’re welcome, by the way, for saving you from that sad loneliness. Where’s T.K.?”” Adriana asks around a mouthful of cheese and peppers. 

“He has a shift.”

She nods in understanding. “Down at Hunk-O-Mania. Gotta get his last dances in before you two get hitched. Nobody wants a lap dance from a guy with a ring on his finger.”

“It is unbelievable that you think that joke is still funny after like three years,” Carlos tells her with a glare.

“God he and Magic Mike both hanging up their tear away pants in the same year,” she says with fake wistfulness. “The stripping world is losing two of its greats.”

“Don’t ever show up here uninvited again.”

Schmutz

“God I love this place,” Lexi says as she bites into a donut. “I will admit I thought gourmet donuts were a stupid idea, but I have seen the light.”

Carlos breaks off a piece of his matcha donut and nods in agreement. “Have you had their mocha one? That’s T.K.’s favorite. They had that lavender one too, a couple weeks ago and it blew my mind.”

“I would usually say flowers and donuts do not go together, but after this?” she holds up the orange cream donut that’s half gone already. “I’m willing to try it.”

They end up cramming their remaining donuts down as fast as they can when a call comes in and they have to go break up some fighting parents at a high school basketball game. It’s nasty and several people have to get seen by EMT’s for bloody noses and black eyes, but no one ends up pressing charges, so they head back to the station to do paperwork before their shift ends.

“You’ve got some donut schmutz on your collar,” Carlos tells her when they get inside and the harsh florescent lighting of the station illuminates them both.

She raises an eyebrow. “Some what?”

“Schmutz,” Carlos says. “It’s like…dirt. Mess.” 

“Somebody’s been hanging out with their fiancé too much,” she tells him with a laugh as she reaches for a tissue to wipe off her uniform. “Are you headed home to cook up a brisket tonight too? Going to hail a cab to get you there?”

“Shut up,” Carlos says, feeling his face redden. 

“Are you going to stop smiling at people in the store too? And start cutting people off in traffic?”

“Oh my god stop.”

“T.K.’s east coast ways have rubbed right off on you. I would have thought the Texas blood ran deeper than that. Oh god,” she puts on a fake horrified look, “do you think Chipotle is real Tex-Mex now?”

He shoots her a glare. “Don’t you have paperwork to do?”

“I’m teasing Reyes,” she tells him. “I think it’s nice actually. Being with the right person should change you a little. And you and T.K. have changed each other in all the right ways.”

She sends him a smile and starts on the pile on her desk, leaving Carlos to contemplate the warm glow her words have put into his chest.

Team

“Carlitos, thank you for coming on such short notice,” Andrea says when Carlos steps through the front door of his parents’ house.

“No problem,” Carlos says. “Sorry to hear Frankie is sick.”

One of their ranch hands had called out unexpectedly and Carlos was a quick and easy replacement. It wasn’t exactly what he’d had in mind for his day off, but family duty wasn’t something he ignored if he could help it. “Where’s Dad?”

“He’s out back,” Andrea tells him. “I texted him and told him to come up to the house. He’ll be here any minute.”

Carlos shrugs out of his jacket and hangs it on a peg by the door before turning around to give his mom a hug. Andrea’s face immediately drops and she sighs. “Oh Carlitos.”

“What?” he asks, confused by her bizarre response.

She shakes her head. “You’re wearing a Mets shirt.”

“Yeah, I think T.K. brought it back from New York the last time he went out to see Jonah,” Carlos says, glancing down at the offending blue t-shirt.

“Carlos, you know how your father feels.”

“It’s a shirt Mom. It’s what I had on when you called.”

“You couldn’t have taken a few minutes to change?”

“You made it sound kind of urgent,” Carlos says in annoyance.

The back door opens and Gabriel walks in, a smile on his face. As soon as he catches sight of Carlos he sours immediately. “What are you wearing?”

“A t-shirt that my fiancé gave me,” Carlos says.

Gabriel’s voice goes low, dark like thunder. “In this house we root for the Astros. And only the Astros.”

“It’s a shirt dad. It’s not a big deal,” Carlos says. “T.K. likes when I rep his team.”

“Don’t tell me he’s got you cheering for them too?” Gabriel says, looking outraged. “Oh my god, where did we go wrong?”

“They have some really good pitchers dad. You respect a good team, they’re a good team.”

Gabriel scoffs. “I can’t believe we’re even having this conversation.”

“I can’t either,” Carlos tells him.

“Enough Gabriel,” Andrea calls from where she’s returned to the kitchen. “He came to help. Leave him alone.”

“What you do in your own home is your business,” Gabriel says tightly, ignoring her. “But I will not allow those colors to be worn in my house.”

Carlos claps him on the shoulder. “Good thing we’re going to be outside then.”

Friends

“Hey babe!” T.K. calls as he walks through their door.

The TV immediately turns off and Carlos whirls around to look at him over the back of the couch, eyes wide and innocent. “Hey,” he says back.

T.K. pauses, eying him closely. Carlos is trying for nonchalant, but T.K. can smell guilt in the air. He sets down his bag and puts his hands on his hips. “What were you just watching Carlos?”

“A documentary,” Carlos says quickly.

“A documentary.”

“Yep.” Carlos pops the “p” in an effort to seem casual.

T.K. dives over the back of the couch and snatches the remote out of his fiancé’s hand, flicking the TV back on. “A documentary about six friends living in New York in the mid-nineties?!” he yells.

“Okay, hear me out,” Carlos says, holding up his hands placatingly.

“You watched without me!”

“I didn’t mean to!” Carlos cries. “I was watching a documentary and then it rolled into the episode when it ended and—“

“You could have turned it off!” T.K. tells him sternly.

“I was going to!” Carlos says. “But T.K., Chandler and Monica?! What the hell?!”

“You said you didn’t even like it,” T.K. points the remote at his chest. “You said it was ‘fine.’ And then you went and betrayed my trust.”

“Well…I got a little invested,” Carlos says sheepishly.

“I’m glad my good taste in television is finally rubbing off on you,” T.K. grumbles. “But next time you decide to watch a pivotal episode of one of America’s greatest sit-coms, you’d better wait for me.”

Dinner

Carlos is so tired he’s not sure he’s going to make it down the hallway. Every part of his body aches to be in bed though, so he trudges onward, one foot in front of the other until he finally fumbles his way through the door. 

He can’t remember the last time a shift was this bad. They hadn’t had a single second to slow down, one call after another, nearly all of them resulting in a physical altercation or take down, and the final call of the day had been a shootout at a bank with multiple casualties. He’s bruised and sore and completely wiped out.

His bag hits the floor and he’s tempted to drop down next to it, but the next thing he knows arms are wrapping around him and T.K. is pulling him tightly into his chest. “Hey,” he breathes into Carlos’ hair. “I was so worried.”

The 126 hadn’t been called into the bank situation, but T.K. must have found out about it from someone because he’d sent multiple concerned texts. Carlos had answered as soon as he could, but there was a big difference between being reassured in a text and being reassured in person.

“I’m okay,” Carlos mumbles into T.K.’s shoulder.

T.K. pulls back and gives him a critical look, fingers brushing over a bruise on Carlos’ forehead and then a minor gash on his arm. “I’m glad you’re home,” he says, a silent acknowledgement that Carlos isn’t actually okay, but he will be now that he’s here.

“Me too,” Carlos sighs. His eyes feel like sandpaper and he desperately wants a shower, but he’s not sure he’ll stay awake long enough.

“Are you hungry?” T.K. asks. “I made dinner.”

“I think I’ll just—“ Carlos stops his response abruptly as he looks at the kitchen. “T.K. what—?”

Every flat surface is covered in pots and pans, cooking utensils, or food. The sink is piled high with dirty dishes and something is still bubbling on the stove.

“I um, I might have been a little anxious waiting for you to get home,” T.K. says sheepishly.

“So you cooked enough for an army?” Carlos asks.

“I’m going to clean it up,” T.K. says quickly. “I know the dirty dishes stress you out, and I planned to have it all done but then the fish took longer than I thought it would and the sauce wouldn’t thicken so…”

Carlos’ brain is still trying to catch up with what he’s seeing. “You don’t usually cook when you’re stressed.”

T.K. shrugs. “I couldn’t sit still so I asked myself, ‘what would Carlos do’? And then I did it. It’s surprisingly effective.” His face softens and he runs a gentle hand over Carlos’ curls. “I can’t fix your day, but I can at least make sure you’re fed. That’s the Reyes Family Motto, right?”

Carlos’ face relaxes into tender smile. “Yeah. Something like that.”

#Tarlos #911 Lone Star #tarlosweeklyprompts #Carlos Reyes #TK Strand #Tarlos Fic #911lsfic #Gabriel Reyes #Andrea Reyes #I Got it From You

[vladdyissues]

Hi, it’s me, the asker who was so curious about Danny at school ✨

I got three things to say, silly thing first, 1. I’m so curious about what Danny’s diet is gonna be. I was rereading that chapter, and if Vlad has to eat meat to stoke the flames, does that mean Danny has to go vegetarian? That would be so fucking funny, I’m ngl 😂 but also sad, bc then he’d be thinking about Sam all the time 🥺 anyways, I’m just interested to see what you do with it 👀

2. You got me thinking about enemies to lovers, hardcore. And I realized, when I enjoy that kind of ship, I’m not here to see them become all lovey-dovey and domestic. I’m here to see the pain, and the toxicity, and the deep codependency of it all. The ‘I hate you, but I can’t leave you’, and the ‘you might kill me one day, and I embrace that.’ If you’ve watched Hannibal, you know exactly what I mean 😂 For Vlad and Danny, I don’t really give a fuck if it’s pompep or badgercereal, i just want angst and codependency 😈 I think that’s part of what I like about your story so much, is that it’s toeing the line between the two relationships. Halfway parental, and halfway toxic/romantic love.

3. You’ve fucking ruined me for other fanfiction rn 😭😂 I can’t read anything else for more than five minutes 🥲 Partially bc I’m so invested in the story, but also bc your writing style IS SO FUCKING GOOD. YOU SHOULD BE WRITING ACTUAL BOOKS, LIKE WTF. Anywayyysss, I’ll just curl up into a little ball of boredom on the floor till you update again 😂💕

Sending much looooove, 😘 I hope the brain to fanfic pipeline is working out for you 🤌

Hello and holy shit! What an ego-bloating kind and generous ask this is! Let me jump right in:

1. I don't want to spoil the plot too much, but Danny's diet is going to be key in unraveling a very important part of Vlad's enigma, and I cannot wait to get to that point. I've been sprinkling crumbs of information throughout the story thus far, laying down a foundation upon which to build this Big Thing, and the next chapter (14) will—or should, anyway—finally begin to deliver on it.

2. My friend, you've just given me an epiphany: it's not so much Enemies to Lovers that we adore, I suspect, as it is Enemies and Lovers. That's exactly the tag I'd use to describe Hannigram, and it's such a different and exciting dynamic. I've never quite—well, scratch that—okay, I've never written Enemies and Lovers in such depth as I am with Familiar. There's something darkly satisfying about letting lovers remain ugly; the notion that deep, abiding affection can exist in tandem with fear and disgust; that even monsters—in the very act of being monstrous, or perhaps because they are monstrous and not in spite of their monstrosity—are capable of loving and being loved.

3. Frhgahrglahrglahg I'm going to print and frame this one and hang it on my wall for days when I feel utterly inept. I've been writing fanfiction for a while now, and I've written volumes of silly, embarrassing, poorly-executed tripe, so if I haven't at least gotten a little bit good at what I'm doing, I doubt I ever will 😆 That said, I'm putting a lot of effort into Familiar, I mean pulling out every stop and employing every nut and bolt in my mental toolbox to craft a good story (and reading. Always reading), partly as a challenge to myself and partly out of sheer love for this great ship and its fandom. Everyone here is so nice and welcoming and awesome. I only hope my tiny contribution continues to entertain.

Speaking of which, the wait for this next chapter shouldn't be long. The feedback I've been receiving is phenomenal, and it's definitely helped to fuel me along when my mania wavers. I'm incredibly grateful to you and everyone reading enjoying this story. Thank you thank you ♥

#asks #writing #enemies to lovers #enemies AND lovers #super nice people #meta #fic: familiar #pompous pep #hannibal

[mostlymaudlin]

fanfic writer challenge!

instructions:

list & explain the three lines/moments from canon that are most fundamental to how you write your fave character

challenge 3 more fic writers to do the same!

ok i did this for carry on but im doing a separate one for aftg <3 because its fun

it is surprising to no one, but my fave character to write is andrew :) and i gotta put this puppy under a read more because i wrote way too much. i have [clenches fist] SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT ANDREW MINYARD !!!

but first, ill tag: @sillyunicorn @starwarned @takitalks @rainbow-0bsidian @pipedream-darling @otherworldsivelivedin @mrskrementz @fortheloveofexy @seasy33 @jostenminyard

(doing more than three to get the ball rolling lol)

Andrew's smile vanished when the elevator started its slow crawl down. Neil returned his stare, every muscle tensed for a fight. At the fifth floor, Andrew pushed away from the back railing and started for Neil. He reached for Neil's keys, but Neil moved the ring out of reach. Andrew tried again, and Neil had to step back to dodge his grab. He backed right into the metal doors and realized a moment too late Andrew didn't care about his keys at all. He buried the ring in his pocket, feeling pinned in. How stupid, that someone so short could have such a presence. -- (The Foxhole Court, Chapter 2)

ok, a long one to start, but important ! one of the reasons i love writing andrew is because of the way hes fucking nuts. and as someone who is also nuts, this is pleasing to me. and let me make this point without using silly euphemisms: mania is a state in which a person is heightened, but they are still fundamentally themselves. their thoughts are not limited by silly things like filters or predicting consequences. it is impulse and pleasure-chasing. so! when i look at andrew, who is supposedly on some whacked out fake drug that induces mania, i think about how his actions that could be brushed off as "he's just high" actually reflect an andrew without inhibitions. this is especially helpful when looking at andrew in TKM, when he becomes incredibly difficult to read.

this scene is the reverse, though, and that's why it's important to me. andrew is not on his medicine here, but he's not Mr. Repressed either. this is an in-between, where he's choosing to let some of himself shine through (mostly with the intention of freaking out neil, lol). and it's great, because andrew shows us a few big things:

he reads & understands people SO well, even if he rarely caters to their needs. the fact that he goes for neil's keys on day 1 to draw a reaction is like... yep. you got him lol.

he is willing to take drastic measures in the name of.... well, at this point in the story we're not sure, but soon we'll see that its to protect his people

he's crazy???? lol. i just think andrew's dialogue in tfc/trk in his brief unmedicated moments (and even his manic ones!) are so indicative of how andrew thinks. he's so fucking weird. in this scene, he follows his cornering act with "How nice to meet you, Neil," Andrew drawled. that's so weird!! he's weird. his brain is silly and clever and quick. This bit and others like it are the foundation on which ive built my version of his POV.

now, speaking of andrew's brain --

Andrew stared stone-faced back at him. Neil would have assumed it a silent rejection of Neil's veiled accusations if Andrew's hand hadn't frozen midair between them. -- (The King's Men, Chapter 11)

let's set the scene. immediately before this, neil has suggested they go on spring break, implied that there was a this, then hit andrew with his "And I am nothing" / "And as you've always said, you want nothing."

so like. andrew just got punched in the gut approximately six times in under a minute. poor guy. when neil prompts him back into action, he first threatens to kill neil, and then kisses the shit out of him. squeeee, ROMANCE!!!

when i look at this scene, i think of that first quote i pulled. i think of andrews silly and clever and quick brain, and about how much work he does to keep his mask on. there are plenty of times his mask cracks, but this one is the most fun because he is so clearly being overwhelmed by FEELINGS. he is confused by neil, irritated with him for bringing up all these things that andrew long ago decided didn't matter, and furious with himself for wanting it all too. he has to freeze so that none of that slips out of his mouth or onto his face. when he recovers, he deflects thru being mean (which is useless against neil, but still a satisfying way to blow off some steam) and then kissing him :) because really, that's what it all boils down to: andrew wants neil so bad it makes him want to murder him.

and look at this, a nice transition to the final scene!

"Rumor has it I'm pretty interesting."

"Don't believe everything you hear."

Neil ignored that dismissal because Andrew was already pulling him down again. They kissed until Neil felt dizzy, until he wasn't sure he could hold himself up anymore, and then Andrew pulled Neil's hand off the beanbag chair. He held it up and away from them for an eternity, then slowly pressed it flat against his chest and let go. Andrew tensed up under Neil's hand but relaxed before Neil could pull away. --(The Kings Men, Chapter 15) (The second Chapter 15) (Because thats something we have to clarify in these dumbass books)

oh my GOD. has a scene ever scened like this scene scened. has a touch ever meant so much. has a character ever tried this hard. ok, once we've all finished banging our heads against the wall and screaming, let's review:

andrew wants neil so bad it makes him want to murder him. but andrew also wants neil so bad that it makes him want to TRY. im actually going to take this apart bit by bit because if for some reason you're still reading this madness, i think you'll appreciate the detail LOL.

ok, first: before this paragraph, neil confronts andrew again with the gravity of their relationship, and andrew plays his usual game of deflecting and bullying. that doesnt work (andrew, has that EVER worked???***) so of course the next action is kissing.

and kissing and kissing and kissing.

and somewhere in all this kissing that is so good that neil is dizzy, something in andrew says: i want more. he takes neil's hand, maybe on impulse, and has to stop to think about what he's going to do. and then he tries to give: he places neil's hand on his chest, LETS GO, and then relaxes under his touch.

its hard to tell how much of this was impulse and how much was thought through. im willing to bet it was mostly impulse, especially because andrew doesnt hit neil with a "i never do anything i dont want to do" when neil acknowledges that this is probably something theyre not ready for. (instead, andrew reacts by deflecting/bullying -- "One hundred and one" -- and then more kissing. so predictable!).

but still! it says so much. it says that he wants and wants and wants, he dreams about things he thinks he'll never have. and neil keeps trying to prove him wrong, and andrew wants to believe him so badly, wants to SHOW neil that he's starting to believe him. scream!!! andrew invented romance. he put neils hand on his chest and LET GO. he said: "look. im trying. i want this too, even if i cant even think the words." he said: "i want to figure out how to trust you."

because underneath it all, i believe andrew is a deeply hopeful creature, and that is the thing he hates most about himself. he wants a home, he wants a family, he wants to belong -- and it makes him feel so fucking foolish. its easier to wrap these wants up in duties and protections, concrete and emotionless things. but neil never actually wanted andrew's protection, yet he still wants andrew more than anyone ever has before. thats fuckin earth-shattering. theres only so much deflecting and bullying and kissing you can do before some of that deeply buried hope claws its way out.

SO YEAH i really didnt need to do all that but i did. if youre still reading then like LOL youre a trooper hope u enjoyed the 2AM Nerd Rory show. but i think about andrew a lot (obviously) and hes such a difficult character to write, so returning to scenes like these three really help ground me in the version of him that lives in my head. so that i can put him in situations :)

***actually wait i just remembered one time where the bullying/deflecting worked, so here's a bonus. in ch 10, the make it to finals and have a party at abbys. andrew and neil are outside, and neil is frustrated with andrews apathy -- "Would it kill you to let something in?" / "It almost did last time." -- and then also starts talking oh so earnestly about how andrew could be court if he'd just TRY. andrew, obviously, gets mad and asks Neil if hes capable of talking about anything other than Exy. which actually hurts neil's feelings, because neil just really likes talking to andrew about exy (the thing hes most passionate about) & deeply values his opinions, and hes upset by the implication that they dont actually have this in common.

and like, you could read this as andrew just being sick of talking about exy lol. but i see it as part of the pattern. andrew is triggered, first of all. and then neil is being a little too earnest about the future and andrew, talk to me. and andrew's fucking overwhelmed !!! he does not know what to do with this! so: lash out. hit neil where it hurts. deflect and bully.

#my writing #ive done a lot of unhinged things on this site but like this might be up there #welcome to the depths of how much i think abt this goddamn CHARACTER

[riddlerosehearts]

okay so, long list of fall out boy concert thoughts mostly for myself and also for anyone who cares:

-i've been pretty excited about getting to see bring me the horizon open for them, and they were soooooo fucking good and got me so hyped. oli got off the stage and walked through the crowd at one point which was pretty cool. wish he had come close to me.

-love from the other side is SO hype and so amazing to see live.

-songs like uma thurman and save rock and roll that aren't normally favorites of mine are also hype just because of everyone singing and dancing and having fun and all the awesome fun stage effects! i was in the vip box area and had a great view of said stage effects. i hadn't watched many tourdust videos before so most of them were a surprise to me. loved the underwater background and bubbles some songs had and the spooky forest looking background, loved all the colorful fireworks, fucking loved when they had a giant doberman and it lip sycned during this ain't a scene it's an arms race and pete made it look like he was putting his head in its mouth. wish i got a photo of that.

-i got chicago is so two years ago in the TTTYG slot and i'm happy with that!

-i am still reeling from getting to hear calm before the storm and disloyal order of water buffaloes. it's 2023 and those two songs are permanent fixtures on the setlist. what the fuck.

-have to be honest that i got disappointed for a second when the opening chords to bang the doldrums played for the IOH slot just because like i don't get to go to multiple shows in one tour and don't know when i'll ever get to go to another show where i have a chance to hear hum hallelujah. so yeah i wanted to hear it because it's probably my favorite FOB song.

-BUT after that second of disappointment i was still fucking hyped and dancing and singing wholeheartedly to bang the doldrums because it's a banger, it's something they only started playing live on this very tour, and it's the one that was almost a shrek song, so can i really complain?

-got headfirst slide in the folie slot, it would've been super cool if they switched it for 27 again but i love headfirst slide too so no complaints there!!

-PATRICK PLAYED I'VE GOT ALL THIS RINGING IN MY EARS AND NONE ON MY FINGERS FOR HIS PIANO SOLO?? thank you patrick i love you i owe you my life

-i'm so glad we got one of the best MANIA songs for the tour, last of the real ones was so fun.

-umm okay so oli sykes may not have walked close to me but FUCKING. PETE WENTZ. GOT OFF THE STAGE DURING DANCE DANCE AND WALKED RIGHT BEHIND MY SEAT!?!?! i think my brain broke and i like almost died for a minute. i did not think to record a video of him walking by 😭 i panicked and snapped a blurry photo.

-AND THEN AFTER I GOT DONE SINGING ALONG TO HOLD ME LIKE A GRUDGE!!! THEY SUBJECTED ME TO FROM NOW ON WE ARE ENEMIES AS THE 8 BALL SONG!!

-look, the only reason i didn't put from now on we are enemies on my 8 ball wishlist was i didn't think they would even consider it. i thought it was just too delusional of a pick. i recorded a video of it and i'm pretty sure it starts with me shouting "HOLY SHIT" right at the opening chords and continues with patrick being inaudible because i'm screaming the lyrics

-made me sad that not many people seemed to know the song though :( like i GET IT because a song that was only ever released NOT EVEN as a b-side but on their 2009 greatest hits album and then never ever played live is a pretty big deep cut. but i wish there had been more energy for it. it does help that pete said "that went better than i expected!" afterward, and hey, i bet some people at that show heard it for the first time ever and loved it.

-the flame effects during my songs know what you did in the dark were sooo cool and fun and so were the big sparkly fireworks during thnks fr the mmrs and the confetti everywhere at the end.

-i saw someone say they should take saturday off the setlist. that is the most wrong opinion i've ever heard. fall out boy shows closing with saturday is a 20-year tradition still going strong and i'm so glad i finally got to experience it.

#i should've done a post like this for my mcr show too but for some reason i wasn't in the mood then #even though i was even MORE insane about that concert than this one #anyway the show was great. wish they had played hum hallelujah for me though #fall out boy

[colossal-niamh]

A loose list of some stuff I’ve been watching:

Super J-Cup 1994- fantastic one night tournament with a who’s who of the era’s junior heavyweights. This was my first exposure to a couple of guys I’d love to see more of, Shinjiro Otani, Negro Casas and Great Sasuke. Aside from the obvious take away that Pegasus/Sasuke was great, my main take away was that I should watch more Super Delfin. Both of his matches were so fun to watch and left me wanting more

Fantastica Mania 2024- a good showcase of probably the best promotion going consistency wise. The 2 matches I’d say go out of your way for are the Atlantis jr/Hechicero match and Stuka jr/ Máscara Dorada

Shota Umino vs Ren Narita, New Beginning 2024- slog, disappointing and did not need the length it has. Admittedly I watched this hoping to see the technical prowess I’ve heard Narita has, so I wasn’t in the headspace for a brawl. But upon rewatching it on its terms I still found it boring.

Katsuyori Shibata vs Kazuchika Okada, Sakura Genesis 2017- yea, still fucks. I actually never knew this was the match Shibata got brain damage which is extra wild because that means he has one of the greatest matches of the decade while his brain was literally dying. Also I can’t not mention how good Okada is at getting bitched out by someone on his level, that exchange at the start where Shibata ties him in knots and you can see the growing “oh I’m in trouble” look on Kaz’s face. Can’t recommend enough

#wrestling #njpw wrestling #njpw #cmll #new japan pro wrestling #fantastica mania

[not-kaiva]

its fun how all four umbilicus in bloodborne can, with some thinking, fit within the four horsemen of the apocalypse. the area or person you pick up the umbilicus is your hunter witnessing a major flaw of humanity. given the themes of this game. a sin, or something, caused by this ongoing misery throughout the land. if you will.

mergo - war - not his wet nurse, but the very concept of mergo himself - he's a everything that's comes along as the aftermath of war. he's the impact. he's the aftershock, if you will. - "The thought of that stuffed rabbit lying in that crater, rain and weather matting its fur, unloved, forgotten, totally alone, lost forever, it fills me with a profound hopelessness…." - amnesia the bunker but consider this emotion evoked by the empty stroller in the middle of a desolate nightmare, and knowing that mergo is dead - he's a child victim of war and also the formless representation of every victim. you hear his cries and see his mother mourn all because of this senseless violence, the neverending war between the schools and all the civilians and innocents and especially the children caught in it. he's heard all over the game, all in places where the scars of war are so evident.

the workshop/the doll's physical form - famine - the doll here represents gherman's hunger for maria ("curious mania") and how the doll would never fill that desire - he wanted maria like an otaku wants a waifu statue. it's like....content is over, let's make our own content! and distorting the truth in a way that's unrealistic. he wanted to possess maria, to have her likenesses. - the doll was never animated by the moon presence to be maria 2.0, because gherman doesn't actually want maria. he wants the coffee shop au fanfic of maria. he wanted a subservient maria to give him ownership over her in a way that he never got from a teacher-student relationship. but the moon presence making the doll (hunter's dream) based off of what she understood gherman's wish was makes sense. she took his desire to have maria take care of and dote on him, but had to change maria in a way that strips off that spice and attitude to make the doting possible. and he didn't want that. he has to live forever facing a facsimile of what he wanted. - it's like fandom people going "i wish this character would do xyz, treat me like this way, do this to me" and understanding the real character would never ever do xyz. but when someone made a fanfic of sweet highschool sweetheart au of that character, you realize all of a sudden it's ooc. it's not the character you fell in love with. - for that matter the whole hunter's dream is this. gherman wants his workshop to be The place that all future hunters come and learn from. he was the first hunter, training hunters, and now you have all these other shops. the church workshop. byrgenworth has a hunter's workshop technically. in this competition gherman wants to be The Hunter again. The Mentor. and the moon presence gave him the dream where he can teach every hunter forever. :) isn't that great? - but it's just like the doll, he's trapped in the dream. when you show up he doesn't even give a fuck about teaching you. just go kill some beasts, it's what hunters do. whatever. he has to live forever with a constant stream of new students, but none of them will replace the One student he wants. - it's the classic interpretation of the horseman of famine. you eat and eat and eat and you're still skin and bones. no amount of food will make you satisfied, and no amount of wish-granting will truly give gherman what he desires. he will only ever get exactly what he wished for.

arianna - death - no matter what you do, she will die - she's pretty hard to keep alive if you don't have prior knowledge. send her to the wrong safe haven, accept her blood too many times, don't send her anywhere, invite the wrong people back to the chapel... - and even if you do keep her alive, just by killing the infant Great One in the final stage will kill her. sure, you "get something out of it" but that's not the point. she's innocent, totally uninvolved in all this chaos. she's done nothing wrong (as far as the morals of blood vs eyes go) and yet she dies in the end. death is inevitable and the hunter is its witness.

fake iosefka - pestilence - she's taken over the clinic, a place of healing, and instead is spreading the beast plague - she's also an example of the sort of sickness and rot invading the schools, since iirc her umbilicus is stolen from the school of insight? - in addition to the moral rot of stealing just for her own personal gain she also very much experiments on those you send to the clinic. which is definitely a rotted thing to do. i know she's not the actual iosefka, and as such fake iosefka is not beholden to healer's oaths. the fact remains that she knocked out the real doctor in order to pretend to treat people and take advantage of their fear and vulnerability to experiment. to deliberately change them and spread the plague. - she's a leech in a doctor's coat. she's everything about horrible people during a pandemic and the panic within. she's what can happen when someone embraces a plague and tries to use it to advance her own status. she's the flaws of humanity you see when pestilence rides into town.

#bloodborne #bloodborne meta #i have a lot more to say than this i just wanted to record these theses before i forgot #the point about gherman wanting to teach again is arguable #but also the fact that every new student is Not Maria is still salient

[catonator]

Games Beaten In 2024: Penny’s Big Breakaway

Call me a games journalist, ‘cus I’m giving attention to an indie game made by (some) people I know.

AAA gaming nowadays is a little like being chased by a giant machete-wielding monster clown, but the clown is in too poor health to actually sprint after you, and doesn’t really wield any interesting exclusive machetes, and most of the time can’t be bothered to show up and instead opts to virtually pretend to chase you in a Monster Clown Direct. And never even whips its cock out.

Anyway, in one of those aforementioned Monster Clown Directs, Penny’s Big Breakaway got a release date, which was right then and there. Probably the only 2024 game I was really looking forward to, since it was made by Evening Star, the studio that consists of a good chunk of the Sonic Mania team and a bunch of fans and modders surrounding it, and it was not a monster clown, instead being a cute little B-grade experience. It seemed to get a relatively muted amount of attention over the end of last year, but was slowly building up interest as more and more people learned about it and began to understand who was behind it. And then the game was shadow dropped out of nowhere. Always a great sign, the babies that flush out of uptown drain pipes into the city river are definitely not mistreated.

I got a little worried the game might’ve gotten shafted by the publisher. It doesn’t seem to be getting the greatest care for the marketing, compared to a more involved hype cycle over a month or so after a release date announcement. Hi-Fi Rush got the same treatment and I feel like as a result it didn’t make as many waves as it should’ve. It also really pissed me off since I had about a dozen other things I was working on at the same time, including another FINISHED blogpost that I pushed back indefinitely because I wanted this one to be more timely. Yeah, fuck you video games for breaking my schedule of misery and frustration to be all fun and shit.

So, Penny is a 3D platformer, as seems to be an increasing amount of indie games nowadays. 

The story is quite simple. Penny, in a freak teleporter accident, ends up merging with a 1970s plastic vacuum cleaner and materialises in a place called Vanillatown. She immediately loses her train of thought and ends up applying to a talent contest for no particular reason after also forgetting how queues work. After she fucks up her audition by stripping the nation’s wannabe- benevolent dictator in front of a live audience, she ends up chased out of the auditorium and around the world with no real sense of goal. That’s about it. But it’s a 3D platformer, granddad, 3D platformers are cool and don’t need story and stories are for Star Trek nerds anyway. Let’s get to the gameplay.

The game’s core mechanic is an animate yo-yo Penny just has for no explained reason (remember: story is for lamerz). The yo-yo acts as both an offence method as well as a platforming assistance. You can use the yo-yo to pull on stuff and hang from the air in a rather satisfying manner. Penny herself can only walk, jump and double jump, and together with the yo-yo you have around 6 different moves to execute, which doesn’t sound like much, but ends up coming together fairly well. Penny on foot controls a bit like a maglev brick, being both floaty and heavy, but this really encourages you to stay in the air as much as possible and chaining various moves to rack up combos that boost your points count.

The control scheme is somewhat unique, in that the game emphasises using the right analog stick to aim the yo-yo while attacking or swinging. Thus you’ll have to jump using the shoulder buttons on the controller. The style is rather experimental and reminiscent of Grabbed by the Ghoulies on the original Xbox… which may be an insult now that I think about it. Regardless, the control scheme works surprisingly well when you get used to it. All in all, learning the feel for the game ends up making it incredibly fun to fly through the stages pretending the floor is some sort of molten rock trap for poor people and shouldn’t be touched. It’s satisfying in a way that’s hard to understand through written word, sort of like reading about sex in a middle school biology book.

So it’s really a shame that the game’s buggier than the annual cockroach dune buggy race in Bugscuffle, Tennessee, bugging you because of the noise levels. Penny seems to have the same roughness around the edges as something like the first Ratchet & Jank. It’s disconcertingly easy to go through a wall, so much so that I ended up doing it more times than I can count on my fingers during a single playthrough and died to it twice. Most slopes can end up softlocking you if there’s any kind of object underneath it since you don’t seem to have any kind of control in them so you end up sliding against an errant potted plant or tranquillised squirrel, and there’s a specific kind of rolling tube object that I think is supposed to have you stick to it like the spinning wheels in Sonic CD’s Metallic Madness. I say I think, since standing on them always plays Penny’s “about to slide off” animation, and you get chucked to oblivion about a third of the time when rotating around them.

Additionally, the camera seems to have started some sort of revolution against the tyrannical rule of The Player. Penny’s central design is that the camera is always on a fixed track, which is nifty since most modern platformers have opted for a camera design philosophy called “whuzzat? we were supposed to do something?” where the camera aimlessly hovers around the player like a rubber spider on invisible string and has no designer-specified guiding at all. The kicker comes from the fact that Penny’s camera is under psychotic levels of micromanagement, but also doesn’t always have a clear idea where it should be pointed. So sometimes you get the camera staring at a really well decorated wall and leaving you confused since there’s no clear idea where you should be going next, and sometimes it’s staring at the admittedly really pretty skybox and daydreaming about greek philosophers when you want to look down and see a platform you want to land on. Any backtracking always creates a fun Crash Bandicoot-style “guess where the bottomless pit is that’s right it’s under you right now” challenge, since there’s no programmed zoom out when running towards it and you can’t see where the fuck you’re going.

And these issues frustrate me all the more since I do genuinely like the game. I did almost throw my controller a few times, but despite the annoyance I always kept coming back to the game and ended up finishing it with a smile on my face. The worlds, while being fairly well-trodden themes, still have enough unique character in them through visual design and denizen dialogue so that they don’t end up feeling generic. The bosses have fun designs and the soundtrack’s really good. When the game does work out, it really works out and it’s one of the most fun platformers out there.

So I guess what I’m saying is, maybe wait a month or so for the most egregious issues to be patched out, or just be wary that you may end up being consumed by a really hungry wall at some point. These issues are the kinds of problems that you’d expect from a first time studio making their first big 3D release, and with the heart and fun present in the game I really hope Penny ends up being successful enough for Evening Star to refine their stuff in future sequels or games otherwise.

Ah, but it’s march, which means that the monster clowns are starting to wake up from their Q1 slumber and the really interesting machetes are being sharpened, so by next month I may even have figured out what the fuck I’m on about. Toodles!

#monthly blog #penny's big breakaway

[msbigredmachine]

Watched Wrestlemania 39. My highlights:

Night 1

1. Right person won the US title match. Not a fan of Cena and probably never will be. Sorry.

2. All the guys in the men’s showcase match went off! Gosh! They all killed it, every one of them.

3. Seth versus Logan was expectedly good. Yes Logan Paul is an ass but that guy is great in the ring. Period.

4. KSI being frogplashed through a table 🤣🤣🤣

5. Outfit of the weekend. I don’t care what none of y’all say.

6. Didn’t really like the six women tag match. I just feel that Damage Ctrl need to split up now. Nothing is going their way.

7. Father and son arguably with the entrances of the weekend. Dom coming from prison and Rey in a low rider with Snoop bumping to two classic songs! 😭

8. This part had me screaming!

9. Dom splashing a drink in Aalyah’s face made me gasp! Excellent heel work by ex condom.

10. Rey winning made all the sense in the world. Months of disrespect ending in the most emphatic way possible. Dominik will be fine.

11. So glad Rhea won. Charlotte Flair is not interesting unless she has the title. The match was entertaining though. Loved it.

12. Lil Uzi Vert playing out the Usos was random, but I like Just Wanna Rock so it wasn’t an issue for me.

13. The Usos in all white is always 🔥🔥🔥. The main event twins!

14.Loved that Kevin and Sami wore matching outfits too. Sami is sooo over it’s crazy.

15. It was all fun and games till the Usos isolated Sami and started teeing off on him. Like fucking assassins. Then Sami kept kicking out and the Usos kept brutalizing him. That shit was uncomfortable.

16. Please rewatch the part where Jey put Sami in the corner and used him for target practice. The slaps, the forearms, the leaping Helluva kick, the trash talk. Jey is soooo HURT. That made me emotional.

17. The near falls were killing me! It got to a point when I stopped commenting and just kept watching because I was mesmerized. I didn’t want to miss a thing by talking.

18. The ending sequence. Cinema. Sami putting Jey away was the icing on the cake. Kevin’s face after the bell rang. The roar of the crowd. My own tears falling. Heartbroken for Jey. Elated for Sami. Unbelievable.

19. Hands down one of the best Mania main events in its 40 year history. Best tag team title match I’ve ever seen. And it did not surprise me at all, because four of the best in the world executed it to perfection.

Night 2

1. Nothing to say about Brock/Omos. Whatever.

2. Night and day between the men’s showcase match 👍🏾 and the women’s showcase match 👎🏾

3. LOOOOL Drew, Gunther and Sheamus beat the SHIT out of each other. Wowwww. The right man won. Gunther has a great aura and needs to hold that shit for a year.

4. That little girl in the middle of Bianca’s troupe lost her mother THAT DAY and still went out and killed her section. She is so so brave and I’m so happy she was still able to get that opportunity. She looked so happy despite her immense loss. My condolences to her and I hope she had the time of her life.

5. I feel bad for Asuka. L after L after L at Mania. But Bianca is a once in a lifetime athlete. Keep that belt on her for as long as possible.

6. I have ZERO sympathy for Shane McMahon. 7 years away from turning SIXTY and your ass still thinks you're 25. LA Knight was LITERALLY there to do this segment with. There are useful nepo babies and useless nepo babies. You can guess where I think Shane belongs.

7. Snoop essentially flying through the air just to hit one elbow drop 😂😂😂

8. Edge and Finn’s video package was TOP tier! And the fact that Russell Crowe was involved is insane!!!

9. Shout out to Finn for continuing the match with his head split open. Holy cow.

10. Great match from Edge and Finn. Really good.

11. The main event felt like a HUGE deal. Fabulous entrances.

12. Immaculate entrance by Cody Rhodes. I had chills. He looked like the star that he is. His jacket was 🔥🔥🔥 The wings on the back made it look so epic.

13. Tears in my eyes when he hugged his family and then gave his belt to Negative One.

14. This was Roman’s first grand entrance as the Tribal Chief. The pianists went off. Loved how the soft piano ended and the BOOM opening of his theme song followed right after. So intimidating.

15. He didn’t change his pants. Just his boots. Boo, Mr Reigns. That doesn’t count.

16. Shout out to Samantha Irvin and her intros. That girl is GOOD.

17. Solo the shooter, terrorizing Cody at every turn. It eventually paid off. That’s why Roman don’t talk to his brothers anymore, lol. They’re not as reliable as their baby brother.

18. ROLLERCOASTER of a match. The ejection of Solo, the near falls! 😭

19. This match would have been five stars for me if it wasn’t for the ref bump. It’s like the 4th match in a row it was happening and it’s a bit repetitive. Let Roman have a no DQ match for once so he can do what he wants.

20. My jaw dropped when the ref counted to three! I honestly thought Cody was winning. I was sooo shocked. Nothing I thought would happen, happened

21. It will be interesting to see what is going to happen next because I have no clue. Will Cody still chase the titles or will it be someone else? How badly will Roman bully the twins now that they are no longer champions?

22. Lmao at Roman using every social media platform to gloat afterwards. He knew this was the reaction he would get and he was loving it.

Overall: Night 1 was much better than Night 2 IMO. Night 1 is probably the best Mania night I’ve ever watched. Practically every match delivered and I was happy.

MVP of the weekend - Dominik Mysterio. He was flawless. Heeled it up to the nines. His match with his father was near perfect. Bright future for that young man

Line of the weekend - “This is what Dominik gave up for those bozos, Dominik deserved what he got tonight at Mania”- Michael Cole spitting 🔥 the entire show.

What did you agree or disagree with?

#roman reigns #wwe #wrestlemania goes hollywood #Wrestlemania #msbigredmachine reviews #Wrestlemania 39

[brukismusicblog]

10,000 gecs Review

Hi hi hi! Very excited to start my blog back up hehe.

Anyways, for my first post I wanted to talk about my favorite release of the 2020's so far: 10,000 gecs

I don't believe in rating music with numbers because I feel like that's stupid and takes away the fun! If you're looking for that you might wanna find another blog <3. Here's what I think is important for the readers to know about this album, general thoughts, etc.

Well first I have to acknowledge: Laura and Dylan took their sweet time with this album. But, it payed off. Slated for release a calendar year before actually seeing the light of day, this album absolutely fucks. Anyone in any 100 gecs online forums (especially r/100gecs) recalls the absolute torture of waiting for this album before any clarification on what exactly happened to the promised release date (and now inside joke between fans) of early 2022. Rumors spread of issues with record production - ironic considering the CD's for both this album and its predecessor 1000 gecs, sold out within 12 hours of being available for sale while it's vinyl counterparts are still in stock. Not for long, though, if my friend group and I - who now have a combined total of six (6) copies of this album between five (5) of us - have anything to say about it.

In their third big release, the duo finds themselves shifting from their iconic sound of glitchy, computerized, autotuned hodgepodges of notes. They spend a lot more time with their guitars in this album. While I do miss the mania of songs like stupid horse or 800 db cloud, I still love how it sounds. 100 gecs is a band with a musical progression that's pretty satisfying to follow. Every one of their releases is easily followed from their last, and the Snake Eyes EP (their first release to break the form of the 10^n gecs nomenclature) serves as a great in-between to 1000 gecs and 10000 gecs. I have to say, I was a bit sad to see the synths take the back seat on this album, but: as badly as I wanted is is as happy I was I didn't get it. Like Robin and Steve.

The interesting thing about this album is that you swear you've heard it before. One Million Dollars comes to mind. 1000 gecs is unlike anything you've ever heard, but at least it doesn't sound so familiar. 10000 gecs is like the dude in your stats class who looks just like the guy you saw at the library yesterday, who you can't shake the uncanny similarity to, despite the fact that they're clearly not the same person.

The SFX soundboard, luckily, isn't eradicated entirely this time around. 757 and mememe defibrillate it especially.

But enough about what wasn't on it, I really ought to get to the good stuff (I'm already how many paragraphs in?)

Firstly, there's some great polkas on here. Frog On The Floor and I Got My Tooth Removed will bring out anyone's inner slav.

It's equally as difficult to make guitars sound so annoying as it is to make annoying sound so good; both things the duo succeeds at. My personal favorite track on the record is The Most Wanted Person In The United States. 100 gecs must have laced these basslines with something. Slap bass is a surprisingly important characteristic on this album, which I love. I mean, who doesn't love slap bass?

1000 gecs tended to show Laura and Dylan's more sensitive sides, dripping with details about Laura's love life. While it did take its time to delve into some out of character topics (like race horse bets, money, and ovens), ultimately a decent amount of the lyrics resonate with the tuning forks of love.

The new album focuses a bit more on the artists themselves. As an STL native, finding out the two members of one of my favorite bands of all time come from my hometown was fucking awesome, and it's interesting to hear about their journeys in growing up there as artists. Hollywood Baby provides a euphoric insight into the glorious escape of the negativity of the midwest. I love it here, don't get me wrong, but this place is less than friendly to those of us who are maybe more inclined to write and be sensitive.

All around though, a grunge rock album from 100 gecs is exactly what the world needed right now. After foreshadowing the pandemic, 1000 gecs becomes a little exhausting, even to those of us who have secretly (or if you're cool, not secretly) loved it from our first rendezvous with stupid horse. What we needed, after years of journaling and whipped coffee, surprisingly wasn't a renaissance (which is not a Beyoncé reference, although I should talk about Renaissance). What we need isn't a return to where we were. It's a moving forward. An acceptance of new spirits, which is exactly what this album is. A metal infused baring of the soul to anyone who's willing to listen.

Now I need to ask, what happened to what's that smell and fallen 4 Ü? 100 gecs made the decision to tour this album before releasing it, which ended with them touring songs that never ended up getting released. Very sad for those of us who spent hour scrolling through gecs on the internet, impatiently bumping our heads waiting for the day our favorite tunes would end up on streaming services.

I also deep down think that 757 might be an allusion to 745 sticky. Could just be me.

🦎🦎🦎

#100 gecs #music #hyperpop #gecgecgec #gec #10000 gecs #gecs #frog on the floor #I got my tooth removed #one million dollars