Am I the only one that feels like NTs HATE saying 'I don't know.'
You will not believe the amount of times I'll ask a basic objective question about a situation and they'll give me an answer, only for later the answer to be completely wrong. And then when I ask them why they would give me wrong information - they say 'I just guessed.'
I didn't ask you for your guess. I asked for the information. If you didn't have the information don't just GUESS. Say 'I don't know.'
I feel like NT don't realize that WRONG information is worse than no information.
If I want to know when an event will end and you say '5pm' - I'm going to be mentally prepared for 5pm. And if it DOESN'T end then, not only will I be out of energy, but I'll be irritated and confused because I'm in an unfamiliar situation with NO INFORMATION
Had you just told me 'I don't know what time it ends' instead of GUESSING 5, then I would've prepared for the worse. But now I have to literally rearrange everything in my head and talk myself down from meltdown cause I was given inaccurate information and also I thought I was going home.
But they act instead like saying I don't know is a moral failure.
My father used to yell at me all the time to not say 'I don't know.'
He'd always demand I figure it out and come up with SOMETHING no matter how uninformed or vague and that's how you have NTs walking around feeling like it's a crime to admit they simply don't know something
and instead they'll just shamble something together and hope that's good enough regardless of whether in the information is actually helpful or correct.
IT'S SO ANNOYING. JUST SAY YOU DON'T KNOW.
Stop guessing and giving me WRONG information because it only makes the situation worse and more confusing. Say you don't KNOW. It's FINE.
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A meme about my fic, believe me when I tell you. This is one of those question lists for ask memes, but I don't believe in that, I am just answering the questions I have an answer to and I've combined a couple of memes into one to get rid of the questions I don't understand.
1: What inspired you to write this fic?
It was a kink meme prompt, so that prompted me. And it's a lovely thing anyway, the idea of John finding lyrics with his name in, but the prompter specifically said that they have a 'heart to heart' and I was immediately enamoured at how ridiculously hilarious it would be trying to have a heart to heart with Paul McCartney about what his song might actually mean. Reading The Lyrics I had spent a lot of time trying to work out Paul's head, and wondering how much he actually believes that the long and winding road is about a road, you know, and what he really means by that, what level he's on with anything he says, so I wanted to write a fic looking at that anyway.
2: What’s your favourite line of dialogue?
"You kissed me."
"I know."
"But you're not..." Paul says. "I mean we're not..."
"I think we might be, Paul."
3: What’s your favourite line of narration?
"Paul kisses him and then kisses him again, and it's such a relief. It's the first thing that's made sense all day. It's the first thing that's made sense for years."
4: What scene (or line) did you first put down? Did you plan it out, or write as you go?
As ever, I wrote the first bit first! Dull but true. And I wrote it as I went, which is always how I write, even if there are going to be chapters which there weren't with this one. I have the vaguest idea of the shape/length of the thing when I start, and then I just write a bit and see what comes next. Saying that, it's a terrible way to write, I tie myself in knots and have to do a lot of rearranging, and I'm not saying it's best, it's just the only way I can do it. I suppose it's like I wrote it by writing down EVERYTHING they might say to each other, and then carving out the bits that made sense.
5: Was it easy or hard to write? Which part was most difficult?
It was okay. I kept hitting dead ends trying to make the conversation flow even a little bit from one thing to another, so there was a lot of moving it about, but it didn't feel difficult until I got to the bit after the kiss. That stalled me for ages because I didn't know how much they really needed to say or if it felt rushed. I still think it does feel a little bit rushed, but also I don't care. I kind of sided with Paul that as soon as they'd kissed it was more important for them to fuck than to actually dig into anything about how they felt or what they wanted or how it was going to work or what any of it meant. Mostly because I think the moment they talk about what they want it's all going to be very difficult again and I didn't want to be involved.
6. How did you choose the POV to write from?
I knew this one would be from Paul's POV because I wanted to get inside the way he thinks about lyrics and songs and try to feel it out as a thing he's genuinely feeling, not something he's aware is defensive, not something where he actually deep down knows that putting John's name in his song means something and just doesn't want to say so, but where he genuinely feels it's perfectly normal and John's being weird about it. (Although then with a slight sense of nervousness when he first sees the lyrics, as if there's something deeper inside him that knows it needs to be hidden?)
I thought about slipping between that and John's POV to really get across how used to Paul's strange thought patterns he was, and how he had to puzzle it all together, but in the end I found it more interesting to try and have Paul show how John was responding and hoping it was clear what John was actually feeling compared to what Paul thought he was thinking.
7. Did you always know how it would end?
I knew it was going to be happy and together, because that's always my aim. And then quite early on the bit of dialogue with John promising to tell Paul which of his own songs are about Paul, came to me and I love the idea of Paul's insides collapsing like a house of cards at the very idea of it, so I worked towards that.
8: Where did the title come from?
The song! I love having a musical fandom, where you just write about a specific song and it makes titling a breeze. (Saying that I'm not sure the title suits.) (But then, saying that, I don't care. The title exists, and that's all I look for in a title.)
9: Were there any particular lines or scenes which you had to cut despite wanting to keep them?
Not as much in this fic as in longer fics with more than one scene in them, but there was this bit, which isn't much on its own, but I quite liked when it was in place because it created a very definite shift in tension and they were both suddenly right there in their skin:
"Is that what's happening?" John asks, his voice low, a rasp in his throat. "Are we losing the whole thing?"
"I think so," Paul says lightly, and he wants to say more, but his throat closes up.
10: What do you like best about this fic?
I like it when Paul just says something totally open and honest without noticing it and John quietly looks at him. Like when Paul's all 'I put your name into all my songs, it doesn't MEAN anything' and John has to just stare for a bit. I like that Paul feels like he has won that point and that John must realise he was being silly. I love Paul. I love that he's stupid.
11: What do you like least about this fic?
I find their voices very hard, so writing a fic of total dialogue was not a good look for me. And I feel like I concentrated a lot on the 'begging you to stay' aspect of oh!darling and maybe some of the 'I'll never let you down/do you any harm' bits would have also been quite interesting to John.
12: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?
I have absolutely no musical associations with this one. I didn't even listen to the song itself.
13: What happens after the end of this fic?
Obviously very lovely things happen in the immediate aftermath. And I do think that being able to touch and kiss and fuck John would suddenly push Paul into boyfriend mode, and he is more capable of being loving in that mode, it gives him permission to be softer, and I think it might blow John's mind and they might be good for each other, I don't know.
I also feel firmly that one morning in a couple of weeks, Paul will mention that he dreamed about kissing John, and casually say that usually when he has that dream they're at the studio, but this time they were at home. And John will stare at him with exasperated fondness and quietly ask him how often he dreams about kissing him, and if he ever thought about what that might mean, and Paul will wrinkle his nose because he dreams about kissing John all the time, and obviously it doesn't MEAN anything, because dreams aren't real.
14: Is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?
NO.
15: What did you learn from writing this fic?
NOTHING.
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bnha: their partner has an oral fixation (part 4)
PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4
Fumikage | Tamaki | Mirio
another round of oddly specific smut hcs. this was only supposed to be 3 parts max but i couldn’t help myselfff. i can’t get this brain rot out of my head. gonna try to keep myself from doing more. 🥴
obligatory mdni, 18 + content. you will be blocked.
tags: aged up characters, fem!reader, oral fixation (obv), oral sex, rough sex, face/throat fucking, finger sucking, unintentional hand & finger kink
Fumikage
the first time it came up, it was fairly early on in your relationship. he made a comment about your addiction to frequent consumption of hard candies. you grinned and made some stupid joke, regretting it the moment it slipped out. “i’d like to suggest that maybe i just like having things in my mouth.” he laughed and said, “oh? we should test that theory out then.” he moved his hand from the inside of your thigh up to your lips. you hesitated at his boldness, cheeks turning bright red. he was determined to call your bluff. “go on.”
despite that, he drew a look of surprise when you mustered the confidence to look him in the eye and take his fingers between your lips, heart pounding in your chest. dark shadow nuzzled up to you affectionately and fumikage looked away with a grin, flustered. “‘s that proof enough for you?”
you’ve never gotten turned on by the thought of dark shadow playing with your mouth. and of course, neither has fumikage. that would be going to far. nope. not even once.
completely melts when you give him head. goes from praising you sweetly & running a hand over your head in the beginning to hips bucking into your throat, fisting your hair, panting with needy moans…. he’s not trying to fuck your throat, he just does because he needs you that much. he finds it beautiful - yes, really - the way your eyes roll and water as you drool, and dark shadow has eagerly reflected that between your thighs more than once. (he was mortified when it initially happened. still feels a little embarrassed by it.)
may or may not have written a poem about it the first time you gave him a blowjob. and if you think he did, no he didn’t. he’s taking that shit to his grave.
his heart swells with affection when you’re blissfully content with his thumb in your mouth. he didn’t expect it either, but once mentioned that he “finds unsurpassed beauty in your vulnerability,” and he thinks that’s got something to do with it.
fumikage has a pretty strong dominant streak now that he’s older and gained confidence, and it definitely shows itself in intimacy. but even when he’s not particularly gentle with you or your mouth, you can see the love in his eyes every time.
Tamaki
def. didn’t consume a lollipop (or any number of things you might be able to put your mouth on) once just for the hell of it to see how it would manifest with his quirk.
i hope you like getting head. and frequently. he’s gonna keep a vice grip on your pretty thighs until he’s had enough of you.
it takes a while for him to open up and say it, but he thinks it’s cute when you’re gagged and drooling. maybe it’s his hand, his boxers, your panties, a ball gag, etc…. you want smth in your mouth? want to pretend no one else can hear the mess he’s turning you into? you got it, bbyg.
tamaki has two sides when you go down on him: the vast majority of the time he’s a lip quivering, leg shaking, whining mess, but on the rare occasion he’s feeling it, he’ll tell you to hang your head off the side of the bed or smth cause you’re gonna get throat fucked until he cums. sometimes there’s middle ground, say lazy sunday mornings for example, but yeah.
lets you have his hands any time you want. might tease a little if he’s feeling bold (rare), but he’s mostly quiet, grinning and blushing like crazy because you’re just so adorable and he can’t believe you’re his.
Mirio
super sweet when you opened up and told him. he had an inkling smth was up simply because he’s observant, but he would wait for you to talk about it first. never wants you to feel uncomfortable about it.
he can be a bit of a goofball in private. phases in and out of your mouth to make you laugh.
probably wouldn’t say it in words, but finds it comforting when you play with his hands and he just gets to sit there, run his fingers through your hair, and love you. it makes coming home on hard days a little easier.
doesn’t often think to have his hand in your mouth during sex, but when he does, you can trust he’d be so fucking sweet and loving about it that it’d make you blush.
also the type to fall apart when his dick gets sucked. babbling praises and nonsense, moaning your name, panting, jerking hips. loves it when you stare into his eyes, but he has to fight the urge to cum instantly.
once asked you to edge him with your mouth. he’s been in sheer bliss while regretting it ever since.
banner created by the lovely @cafekitsune.
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