#brain damage is fucked up

[aq2003]

like the important thing you must keep in mind about ten when you see him do literally anything is that he's soooooooooo so so so bad at actually isolating himself from other people. so TERMINALLY bad at it. he thinks to himself "i don't need human connection because everything i do causes pain and destruction to those around me :(" but then he experiences a crumb of human connection and his heart starts to spill out of his chest

#tenth doctor #dr who #doctor who #yeah i say heart singular cuz he said 'i suppose they break my heart' in the next doctor and i have perma brain damage over it #btw. this is why him and martha in the first half of series 3 are Like That. he trusts her deeply but he also doesn't want to form #another deep emotional connection bc look what happened with rose! right! i think partially the reason why he #has his moments of opening up about his past is because he thinks 'well she isn't going to see me again after this' #'i might as well tell her if she asks. it may even scare her off'. this is INSANE. he is INSANE. and he is so fucking STUPID #fool! you are developing a connection with someone!!!!!!! not pushing them away!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #look at what you are doing to martha's self esteem bro!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #10 era

[mamadarama]

525 - madara would be the type to refuse medical treatment in emergencies and then pass out from blood loss and have to be taken to the hospital anyways

#I FUCKED UP THE SCHEDULING SORRY GUYS #the madara one is coincidentally quite thematic cuz i learned that i might have brain damage today #handcrafted funnies #enstars textpost #ensemble stars #enstars #natsume sakasaki #shu itsuki #leo tsukinaga #izumi sena #makoto yuuki #arashi narukami #adonis otogari #koga oogami #tomoya mashiro #madara mikejima

[designernishiki]

ladies and gentlemen. we got em

#this is so fucking FUNNY dude banxbsnanxb #STRAIGHT PEOPLE ON REDDIT ARE SO MAD AND IM JUST SITTING HERE. GRINNING. PLEASED #that’s 700x more in character than the alternative and I’m just praying this is true/legit (cause I couldn’t find the exact interview this #is from- but I didn’t see anyone saying it was fake on Twitter/Reddit so idk) #to be fair I could only scroll through comments on reddit for like a minute before it started giving me brain damage so #but yeah bdbxsbscshxjdj YOKOYAMA. MAYBE IVE BEEN GIVING YOU TOO LITTLE CREDIT. #I absolutely love seeing all these basic ass straight folks getting so pissy about him not settling down with a nuclear biological family #and a wife and all that and dying at the ripe old age of his fucking mid-50s #like no shit???? what games have you been playing bro the whole fucking Point of his idea of family is unconventional #he’s literally a fucking orphan who didn’t grow up with any biological family are you fucking fr #dgagdhdhd ANYWAY yeah I’m seriously hoping to high heaven that this is legit #rambling #kiryu #yakuza #rgg #rgg8

[cherryjuicegf]

what? What? what happened to you. i've lived a long life, you'll have to be more specific..... Chaos appears to be done with me. what you've lost your MAgic isthatevenpossible.. go on, get your gloating in. time's limited.. you know once upon a time i would have used this opportunity to call you an empty lonely power-hungry she-demon but. i'm an artist, yennefer.. it's my Job, to put myself in other people's shoes. even if they are in your case Large and Clunky and idon'tknowprobablyfullofsnakesorsomething... i'm scared too. i'm scared that one day the muses will stop speaking to me. because Who Are We when we can no longer do the One Thing we were put on this continent to do? we find a New Purpose. a Better one. hopefully.. hmm. Chaos could never be done with the Likes of you, YEnnefER Of vEngerbErg. of that much, i Am Certain. so if it's all the same to you.. goodbye. good Luck. g o o d r i d d a n c e.. same to you ....

#when i die put this on my grave and nothing more #the way this was all from memory except for the insult details...... serious brain damage #it's been two years and no scene makes me ascend and scream and throw up the way This scene does they were so insane they changed my life #what the fuck . what th e fuck #tattooing it on my eyelids #the witcher #yennskier

[mattiebluebird]

I know it's fiction but it makes absolutely no sense for the batfam not to have any significant (visible) scars/disabilities at all. They get beat up nightly for years on end. They leap over buildings all the time, they've never fucked up their knee? Knees are so easy to fuck up and difficult to fix. Dick is an acrobat, they have notoriously bad joint health and at his age he shouldnt be able to pull off half the shit he does. Absolutely ridiculous they have no scars or brain damage. THEY DONT WEAR HEAD PROTECTION OF ANY KIND. They're getting punched in the face, thrown off of buildings etc etc ALL THE TIME. No brain damage?? No CTE??? Not even missing teeth?? Give me a fucking break.

#honestly im sure its mostly bc of the weird insistence that Only Villains Can Have Scars #which is. so stupid. #i have beef w most fighters in media bc they NEVER HAVE HEAD PROTECTIONZ #despite the fact that your skull is so important & also a major target for any opponent #like even barring the obvious protection from. yknow. brain damage. did Bruce never get cps calls bc his kids always have black eyes #and broken noses? #being an athlete/gymnast from a young age FUCKS UP your body. ig id just like to see an acknowledgement of that #well jason wears a helmet but ig he learned from his mistakes. lol #also why i like dukes helmet (training arc one not. wtv he has now.) #ig the cowl MIGHT count as head gear. but robins dont get shit huh. #dc #batfam #dc comics #jason todd #duke thomas #dick grayson #damian wayne

[crowthis]

I FOUND MY OLD  ART FLODER?? THAT  I  QUITE LITERALLY FORGOT ABOUT??? sorry im not breaking it in half. as is. like a long flag of toilet paper

#bbkaz #babies look away #helP i was so big brained b4 multiple head damage episodes #long post #if u hate me then kill me or shut the fuck up #sketch

[synthshenanigans]

Is this ur evil twin? /j

Oh no. That is my close best buddy. I use to play Saxophone so me & Sax Shenanigans go WAY back

This fucker however-

#slash jay #kk slider shenanigans is chill tho #He's cool #the drum shenanigans however better watch its back #moss post #when's the synth shenanigans coming back huh #chonny jash #the is all from the fact that i got wacked in the back of the head with a drumstick once #[technically a mallet but have had sticks thrown at me once] #it may have been an accident but fuck you my brain damage #drums are temporary brain damage is forever #again /j #tho i did get hit with a mallet before tho. a person who played the marimba had one in their hand while talking to someone #they moved their hands whist talking & as I walked by the hall i got bonked. was totally an accident & also really funny #anyways i really love this song too #love the in club [or whatever place you'd call it] feel it has. very chill & warm #we also now have as many cruisins as mind electrics #which is such a goofy contrast #love this one tho very nice & groovy i love it #kyle is fuckin it up on that saxophone #i love it

[nosleep83]

I’m sorry but I can’t stop looking at Mikey in this scene 😭😭😭😭😭😭

#bro got FUCKED UP #he looks like he got brain damage #and he probably did let’s be honest #tmnt #mutant mayhem #mutant mayhem michelangelo

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

there's something so soothing about holding a weapon when you're Nervous. me and this solid metal fire poker have bonded for life

#the front proximity light keeps going off #and when you live in an area where there are no street lights - its Pitch Fucking Black outside - its freaky!!! #i know its probably a large bug or a nocturnal bird or a bat #since it just went off again and i went to check and there was nothing #BUT ITS STILL FREAKY #idk if this sensors wonky or if theres something flying or if we got ghosts but i dont like it!!! #i dont appreciate it!! #absolutely unprompted #oh heavy blunt damage weapon in my grasp... ease mine addled mind.... #i think im gonna re-set up in my bedroom #blissful ignorance! #my brain keeps conjuring scary images and intrusive thoughts... #begone demons!!! away with ye!!

[factorialsotherfandoms]

OPD spoilers up to the end of episode 7, because episode 7 was fun but brain insisted on a couple of thoughts before I can move on (or, apparently, work on thing I was supposed to upload today). Injury warnings, spoiler warnings, and talk about potential death, and also er I've had these characters for one episode running on auto-translated-auto-subtitles. You will pry them from my cold-dead hands, but it's not exactly the best way to study things like speech patterns, especially when my Portuguese is... I can now catch the gist of things and follow the rpg mechanics mostly, but very very far from me being able to use any words? I just kinda can sort of follow via context and stuff I /recognise/ but don't /remember/. Enough rambling, have two guys in a car.

"Where to now?" Johnny asks, as they drive away. "You're the one with the maps."

A groan.

Johnny glances up, checks his partner in the rear-view mirror. Some of his muscles still shift in ways Johnny is pretty sure aren't entirely voluntary, and Rubens holds his entire body like it is in pain. Still, he gives half of a shrug, and keeps looking out of the window.

Johnny is also sore, yes, especially from having been immobilised - but he's /not/ the one whose breathing sounds kind of janky, and hissed when the seatbelt touched his ribs.

"That bad?" He adjusts his question to, glancing up from the road every few seconds.

"Just head home," Rubens answers the first question instead of the second. "We can pick in the morning."

"What morning? It's already gone seven," Johnny takes the turning towards their flat regardless. A pause and then. "You sure you're good just to go home?"

Yes, they need to continue the investigation, but even Johnny can see that Rubens can barely stand; no matter what help they wanted to give those two other agents, it wasn't going to happen.

"What-" Rubens is cut off, hissing, as they go over a bump.

"Yeah, you know what, driver's rules - we're going to the hospital."

Rubens' lack of reply, not even a grimace, is pretty damning. It is also a little worrying, especially with the flinches and extremely deliberate breathing.

It is not that Johnny is paranoid, it's that he knows what that attack did to Johnny himself, and he's gained a decent feel for Rubens' tolerance over the last few months.

He takes the turn towards the hospital, and already starts constructing a lie. Rubens can probably pass for an electrician, and Johnny could have just been helping, and maybe someone turned the mains back on before they were finished? That's got to happen all of the time, right?

"Do you think we'll see them again?" Johnny asks, searching for a conversation topic. He's got to keep driving, but he is more than starting to get worried. "No clue what's up with the boy, but they seemed decent. Good to know the Order's always got people."

Rubens' laugh isn't very happy, "no."

"I thought you were an optimist?"

"Your job," Rubens shifts, seemingly trying to alleviate some discomfort, and only making it worse. "I'd like to, but… you saw them. Injured, electrocuted, and going to where their team went dark? They won't survive. We might not."

It's true, but that doesn't mean he has to say it. There's been a lot of deaths, recently, if what Sam has been telling them is true. Johnny isn't sure, but can't see any reason for Sam to lie about that; Johnny and Rubens have been undercover for months, but have managed to keep themselves above water so far.

A lot of people haven't, though. A great many people haven't.

"You left them your knife," Rubens follows up with.

"Shut up and sort through that notebook instead."

"No." At least he's perked up a little, actually sounding a bit more awake, thinking and shifting a little and worrying his lip before he speaks again. "Maybe they'll surprise me and you'll get it back? Can't read the notebook. The bag is in the boot."

Neither of them comment on how, usually, Rubens would still just lean over and grab it.

"Maps, then?"

He makes a left turn, and they find themselves nearly there.

"They're maps," Rubens replies. "We need the notes to work on a target... Gameshow, orphanage, orphanage, gameshow, Menefreda, puzzles, Energy... I can't see the link; do you think there's any crossover in the cases? Should we ask Samuel for their notes? Something's missing here."

"Can't be sure," Johnny has to focus on this bit of road, busier than the further out streets. "We can ask, though."

"And the girl? Erin? She said the woman's voice was-" Rubens cuts off with a gasp.

Immediately Johnny looks up, checking over his shoulder. Rubens' back is arched and he struggles for air; he shoves on his hazard lights and pulls over before unplugging his seatbelt, and inelegently scrambling across.

By the time he has done so, Rubens' body has relaxed. He has leant back, breathing heavily and clutching at his chest. Johnny places a hand on his back, rubbing a thumb into the twisted muscles there.

"Rubens?" Johnny asks, voice lower. "You good?"

The shudder looks just as involuntary, but a little more normal; Rubens leans slowly forwards, resting only one elbow on his knee, and folding his chin onto it.

One moment, two.

Rubens starts gesturing a reply, only to cut himself off with a wince.

"An answer, please," Johnny keeps his voice low, doing his best to be reassuring.

"I'm good," he answers, blinking fast as he shifts to looking at his hands. "I'm... Good, yes, good. Just, fuck, the speed bump."

Johnny had barely even noticed it; Rubens has got to be much more injured than he looks to react that badly to just a speed bump.

"I'll be more careful," he promises, though he isn't quite sure how. "Good to keep going? We're another ten minutes out, looking at this traffic."

"All good."

It is not quite believable, given everything going on, but Johnny chooses to let it pass. He knows shit all about these things, only that his partner is suffering. He's also suffering, but he's Johnny - he can take it.

Rubens... Not so much. Not really his skill-set; Johnny doesn't jump in the way of fists because he enjoys getting punched, after all.

Choosing to climb back over instead of getting out, Johnny only slightly catches his ankle on the gear-stick. Still, he gets back to the driver's seat safely, turns off the hazard lights, and pulls back into the road.

"Any thoughts so far?" he asks instead.

Johnny can put pressure on a gunshot wound just fine, but electricity is weird. Magic electricity? Even weirder. He does, however, know that so long as everyone is managing coherent conversation he /probably/ can just drive to the hospital instead of faffing with an ambulance.

(Don't they have their own doctor now? Johnny isn't quite sure, but he does know that contacting the Order, outside of secure and prearranged chats with Samuel, is likely to break their cover.)

Rubens shifts his face from side to side, mouthing words to himself and gesturing his hand around in a much more typically Rubens fashion. After a little while he shrugs - only with one shoulder and that's something to make the doctor check - and answers, "hopefully the paperwork is more useful to us; I don't think the Director was actually anyone important. Show, Director, he only does this one bit most likely? And only had, what, five staff members?"

"Barely a crew," Johnny replies. "I don't like the thing with Erin's grandmother - she's definitely not any of the corpses. None were old enough. So why was her voice there?"

"The man too," Rubens replies. "You shouldn't have told them we were Order agents; the cameras were running. Whoever runs it might have heard."

"Shit," Johnny can immediately see the problem but, to be fair, in the moment that had been far from his highest priority. Getting the grenade out already blew more of his cover than either of them liked - he should have just stolen the gun and tried shooting the glass. "We can adapt, but..."

"Danger," Rubens replies. "We'll need to be more careful, right?"

"Right," and, fuck, Johnny has been here before. "We might need to be subtler to get in."

"Games," Rubens replies.

"Hm?"

"He likes games. If we-" another speedbump, and Rubens gasps again, entire body twisting at the pain, but he settles himself quickly, moving on. "Fuck. But, if we do get in... it might be to play with us specifically. If the recording got through. Champion's match. New difficulty."

"Maybe the information we have will be enough?"

The look Rubens gives him is absolutely scathing.

"Yeah, okay, they weren't important enough to have anything actually good. I can wish, though; don't really want to be watching over my shoulder forever."

"It could work in our favour," Rubens settles on. "We need to get into deeper areas anyway. Toying, playing - if we interested whatever's in charge, perhaps it will bring us deeper to try again."

"They're deathtraps."

"But somebody always has to win. It's a bad game, otherwise."

Two people could have won the game they were playing, if they stuck to the rules, or perhaps there would have been more to it. Johnny doesn't expect them to be that generous again, though.

Ah, well, they'll work it out.

They always do.

---

It is not that much further to the hospital, and 7:30am is a blissfully quiet time. Most people from the night before have already left, but it's too early for most sorts of accidents.

Parking is easy, but getting out is more difficult. Well, no, Johnny can get out fine - stiff and weirdly cramping, but fine. It's Rubens he worries about, Rubens who scoots rather than steps out of the car, and still almost immediately collapses to the floor.

The concern - the /worry/ - is back nearly instantly.

"Ow, fuck, shit," Rubens mutters, in between the curse words as he uses the side of the car to leverage himself up.

Yeah, no, that is not going to stand. Johnny comes back over, taking the one of Rubens' arms that he isn't holding strangely, and pulling it over his shoulders. His own arm he wraps around his partner's back, protecting him from any potential falls.

When he squeezes his fingers, Rubens hisses; Johnny shifts them further down with an apology on his tongue.

"It's fine."

It's not fine.

The angle is awkward, so Johnny much crouch a bit as he helps Rubens to the emergency room. Even with the help and the rest he still keeps staggering and stumbling, his legs barely able to hold his weight.

The reception desk is even worse. By the time they get there, Johnny is supporting all of Rubens' admittedly meager weight.

"Hey," he says, reminding himself she may be the gatekeeper but if he isn't polite then they are both in trouble. "Sorry, we were doing some repair work, and some asshole turned the mains back on while we were working. I'm just kinda sore, but my buddy's having trouble breathing."

Always mention the breathing. They hate it when you cannot breathe properly.

Her eyes flicker momentarily wider, looking at the now disturbingly grey Rubens.

"Names, please?"

"I'm Johnny Tabasco, this is Rubens Naluti."

Rubens seems to try to smile and wave, only to grimace and flinch instead.

A few more questions follow - dates of birth, occupations, next of kin, particularly concerning symptoms... Rubens says unusually quiet, getting slowly heavier against Johnny's side.

Eventually, the questioning comes to an end.

"Please go sit down, and fill in these forms," two clipboards are handed to Johnny. Right. Insurance paperwork and medical history - at least he knows enough of Rubens' to fill it in, after so long doing this work together. "Someone will likely be with Mr Naluti shortly, though you yourself will likely have to wait longer. We're not overly busy, but there are still a few incidents already."

"Thank you," and oh, Christ, he's just glad to be able to get Rubens off his feet.

They end up on the plastic chairs, Rubens flinching at it.

"You alright?" Johnny asks him.

There are a good number of fast blinks before Rubens nods, "let's not repeat this, though."

"Sure thing."

Rubens' hand (and only one hand, the other stays at his side) shakes badly as he starts filling in his form - the simple bits like address he leaves just in case, and starts with his medical insurance details. Allergies, pre-existing conditions... Rubens is doubling back to fill in his basic details when a doctor appears.

"Mr Naluti?"

"Here," he raises his clearly good hand.

"If you would come with me, please?" she asks.

He glances to her, to the gap between them, and then to Johnny. Johnny goes to get up to help, and she says "wait here, please, triage for adult patients is done alone."

And, sure, but didn't they get the notes?

Rubens looks at Johnny, only slowly nodding after they have made eye contact. Johnny is not entirely sure what it means, but he prepares himself for trouble anyway.

And then Rubens /tries/ to stand.

This time when he falls, he catches his weight on his bad arm. Johnny just about manages to stop his head or chest crashing into the floor, snapping at the doctor with a "didn't you /read/ he can't walk right now?!" as he helps him back onto the chair.

It leaves Rubens even more off-colour, and shaking, and Johnny not a great deal impressed with what is going on.

"I'll be right back," the doctor vanishes back the way she came.

"Will you be okay alone?" Johnny asks.

"Eh," Rubens manages a small laugh - his breathing is not settling this time, remaining too fast and too shallow. "I'll manage."

"Of course you will."

Johnny wishes there was an easier way to solve this specific bullshit at least.

Quickly, Johnny finished Rubens papers, and lets him sign them. They are ready when a different doctor appears - this one accompanied by some lower ranked staff member pushing a wheelchair.

"Mr Naluti, I'll be taking over from my colleague," the new doctor says. "We need to speak to you alone - privacy and protocol, you understand - but he can help you transfer if that is better for you?"

It is better for Johnny, at least.

"It's up to you," he still manages to say, standing and offering his arms, just like getting out of the car.

Rubens nods, and takes them, struggling the few short steps from the chair to the wheelchair. Johnny helps him get... not comfortable, but less uncomfortable, before placing Rubens' clipboard on his lap.

"See you shortly," Johnny promises.

"Yeah," Rubens replies between tight breaths. "See you soon."

---

Johnny does not see Rubens shortly, not even close thereto. They did bring the evidence with them, split between their bags - it's been stolen from their car before, and that was it's own form of nightmare - but he cannot exactly work on it here. Neither can he work on it without Rubens, who...

"Mr Tabasco," one of the nurses had told him. "Your friend - Mr Naluti? He asked us to tell you... He needs to be admitted due to internal damage? Primarily to his lung. There is surgery involved, though the tear is small and so it is a relatively simple procedure. It is not common with electrical injuries, especially with mains supplies, but it can happen. The doctor wished to work on it immediately, and he consented. There were some other internal injuries too - all consistent with severe muscle spasming or electrical burns. You'll be able to see him once the doctors have finished, but he'll be here a few nights most likely; until the chest tube comes out, at least, perhaps longer depending on his ribs. Given the nature of his injuries, and that you were injured together, the doctor wishes to see you immediately."

And Johnny liked none of that, not at all. He complied with the doctors simply to get through everything, and given an injection to force his muscles to stop cramping. He hates how it helps him feel less like shit, and concedes to their desire for at least 24 hours of wires and monitoring only once he realises it will place him and Rubens on the same ward.

The ward is louder, and busier, and Johnny hasn't slept since this time yesterday, if nobody counts getting knocked out and kidnapped. Still, he cannot rest yet, not until he knows Rubens is fine. There are, at least, some non-work related books in his bag; he'll text Sam with an update once he's sure what's going on, and until then at least try to relax.

Thankfully, he does not get more than two chapters in before Rubens is brought through. Something he said must have stuck with the doctors, as he is given the next bed along. Propped to half-sitting, with some wires and tubes and thick bandaging around one shoulder, but awake and unhappy about it. Johnny waits for the medical staff to finish adjusting him to take a better look; Rubens' eyes trail after them somewhat nervously, and hospital blue does not suit him but he is looking a distinctly better colour.

"You alright?" he asks, drawing attention from the room to himself.

Rubens visibly relaxes when his eyes catch on him, bored and reading. He gestures to himself with his unbandaged arm, clearly moving carefully so as not to disturb anything.

"You?" he returns with.

"Painkillers help," Johnny offers, and receives a firm nod of agreement. "I'm sore, but fine. Might have torn something, but swelling needs to go down to check. The burns are too deep, but my nerves are a bit sensitive and they want to be absolutely sure the ones around my heart are fine before they let me leave."

"Heart?" Rubens asks, his attention focusing in for a second, before someone dropping a tray of medicines with a loud 'fuck!' draws a flinch and his attention.

"Doctor said if there was going to be a problem there probably would be by now, but he wanted it monitoring just in case," Johnny does his best to reassure. "You... look a bit more alive?"

"Not alive enough to read."

Johnny laughs, "I wasn't going to ask you for that already. Did they say how long you're here for...?"

Rubens shakes his head a little, "no 'heavy exercise' for at least 4 weeks. Maybe more. Depends on my ribs."

"I'll let Sam know. We can sort through the paperwork and update reports in the meantime."

"Ugh," he flops harder into the pillows, seemingly trying to lay down - something the nurses made impossible for the both of them - but gestures consent. "Tell him 'just hack the hospital records'."

"Alright. Get some sleep, or I do have our bags? I think your wallet is in there if you want to buy access to the TVs. Not sure what else you packed."

There is just the problem of getting Rubens' bag to him.

Rubens seems to choose sleep, though, or at least closing his eyes to think about something - it's been a long night, and Johnny will probably follow once he's reported in.

Just a short text message; Sam can work out a more secure connection if he wants information immediately, otherwise he can wait until at least Johnny can head home and ring. Scanning he can also do, but accessing the digital documents will have wait for Rubens. Not that the Order is ever running to time anyway.

'Hey Sam' he types, keeping things on their personal phones as civilian sounding as possible. 'So first off, don't panic, nobody's dead or dying, but Rubens and I are in hospital. He said to tell you to just hack the hospital records, so now I've said it. Not really in the mood to explain

.., but the short is some asshole got us electrocuted...'

#op fanfic #opd #ordem paranormal #fanfic #rubens naluti #johnny tabasco #fuck i have no idea what the character tags are here #maybe now this'll finally leave me alone and I can go work on what I *wanted* to be working on atm #episode 7 currently lives rent free in my brain #have yet to start 8 #doesn't seem like the thing to do in a bad mood #hospital tw #injury tw #no way did they just go continue like normal with rubens on 2HP #they were absolutely showing off #johnny probably sewed up the grenade hole in the car given it was non-statistical damage #something about being undercover and so not having all the resources and maybe having blown their cover but theyve got to keep trying anywa #needed them to have a contact so picked the tech guy whose name i could remember #its a tech investigation sooo made sense to me

[soullessjack]

I am so not getting into it now bc sleepy exhausted but there is something so terrible and bleak about jack never fully going evil even during his obligatory evil arc. like I’m sorry but I don’t care about the nonbelievers he put worms in bc he literally thought it was like hunting and he literally thought he was making sam and dean happy and he’s already been shown to be violently reactive by nature He is not any different than he was before .he’s just himself but worse

#THAT WAS ALL HE FUCKING WANTED BRO #ALL HE WANTED WAS TO MAKE THEM HAPPY AND MAKE UP FOR MARY AND BE THEIR KID AGAIN #HE SAT ON THE THRONE OF FUCKING GOD AND LEFT IT IN A LITERAL HEARTBEAT TO GO BACK TO THE BUNKER #cal.txt #spn #jack kline #soulless jack #sam and dean #augh. #he’s just himself. but worse. #he’s not evil he’s just himself. okay! gave myself brain damage someone drop a piano on me

[aq2003]

this screenshot is enhanced by how he says this right after playing baron in a very deep cutting scene about riz's aromanticism

#brennan lee mulligan #d20 #fantasy high #THANK YOU BRENNAN for being fucked up and evil enough to give me aromantic representation in the most brain damaging way ever <2

[fennel-tea]

That Awful OTP Meme, or: my Binah/Hod manifesto

I originally posted this on twitter but while this is mostly tongue-in-cheek I actually have a lot of thoughts on these two that are generally summarized by [god DAMN I love the interplay of two people who are varying degrees of Terrible]

or just, like, a Hannigram meme.

#fennelart #project moon #binah/hod #lobotomy corporation #lobotomy corporation spoilers #the thing is that binah has never had regrets. binah has never had the time or desire to let herself have regrets #hod on the other hand is Full of them. she is someone who is trying very hard to be a good person #but is going at it from an entirely selfish direction (circa lobcorp) and just ends up completely sucking anyway #which is honestly part of her appeal to me? #i like the idea of them picking each other apart which is a thing that is extremely one sided at first because. it’s Binah #but even binah is still human albeit an extremely fucked up one and I think if hod manages to poke her head out of her own issues she could #start to see where the lines are #also she (binah) is locked in a basement and bored as shit and will take anything remotely interesting at this point #hence where I put her on the devoted scale versus indifferent #could you call it romance? #it’s not healthy in the slightest but no ship with binah involved is lmao #anyway this whole essay in the tags is mostly to say I’m proud of myself for the black damage joke lmao #periodic black damage and a -50% debuff to your stats. its the give and take you know how it is #shoutouts to the person writing binah/hod in the ao3 tag like two years ago you thoroughly infected my brain

[rutadales]

they fucking killed him before he got to see if sonic 3 (coming to theaters December 20, 2024) was a faithful adaptation of Sonic Adventure 2 (available on steam right now for 9.99) ....

#c!dream #dreblr #root doodles #In the panel with punz he's explaining how charmy was originally written to be like. very stotic and mature #bc in his original characters description that's how he was described so that's how they wrote him in the Archie comics #but then when he showed up in the mainline games and got more personality he was very childlike and goofy #And Sega wanted charmy in the comics to match charmy in the games especially as they drifted further and further apart personality wise #so. the writing team. Gave Cha.rmy the bee. Brain damage. #fucking wild. I think about this like 6 times a day.

[khruschevshoe]

"You too, huh?": An Unhinged Ten/Jack/Martha Meta

Alright, so, Ten/Martha/Jack's dynamic has been rotating rent free in my brain all week. You have two people- Jack and Martha- who both admit to fancying a man who could never love them back, a man who is so embroiled in grief over a woman that Jack clearly once loved as much as he loved the Doctor, a man who showed them the stars and showed them the horrors of the universe. A man who directly leads to them both becoming greater and worse than they ever were before, a man who took their lives and twisted himself inside of every strand of them forever, a man who offered them a hand and kissed them and became the best and the worst thing to ever happen to them.

And it's not just the Year That Never Was- it's more than that. It's Jack dying for the Doctor and then being cursed with eternity and yet despite a century of being tortured by Torchwood/waiting for the Doctor, he never lost hope in the Doctor being able to fix him. It's Martha going through some of the worst shit any companion has had to in a single season (the racism/hopelessness she had to face in Human Nature/Family of Blood, being stuck in the 1960s for months and having to get a job with no guarantee that she'd ever make it out, having to walk the dystopian earth for a year with the weight of the literal world on her shoulders, nearly burning to death due to a living sun, taking on the psychological weight of keeping the Doctor steady- hell, the Doctor's purposeful ignorance of her feelings isn't even at the top of the list and yet it still did damage) and yet managing to find the strength to respect herself and leave.

It's the way that both of them have their images of the Doctor irreversibly cracked at the end of the Year That Never Was. They still believe in the Doctor, would still go to the ends of the earth for the planet, as we see in Journey's End, but they don't quite fancy him anymore. They can't. Jack was tortured and killed over and over again by the Master for a year straight and Martha was forced to walk the burning earth for a year straight while her family was tortured and yet at the end of it all, the Doctor didn't comfort them. He cradled the Master in his arms and begged him to regenerate and sobbed when he didn't.

It's the way that Martha and Jack are the ones to make the initial threats to Davros in Journey's End. (Yes, Sarah Jane helped with the warp star, and made threats of her own, but Martha and Jack opened up the comms. They looked the creator of the Daleks in the eyes and said do you hear me?) Martha and Jack walk off at the end of Journey's End holding hands, because they're so similar, at the end of the day, because they understand each other, because "you too, huh?"

But it's also the Doctor looking at them both and seeing Jack and seeing something wrong with the man he once loved (don't tell me that Nine didn't reciprocate his feelings, I've got a whole post on the Rose/Jack/Nine dynamic) that he can't ignore, because he's the last one of his species and he's the only one left to pay attention to the laws of time. It's the Doctor needing a doctor of his own, someone with a better grasp on themselves than he does, and completely ignoring the damage that it does to her to keep him steady.

It's the Doctor being unable to love Jack while Jack over and over again coming to his call. It's the Doctor coming the second that Martha calls him in the Sontaran Stratagem and maybe, just maybe, realizing that he got something wrong. It's about Martha being a doctor being a soldier and the Doctor being a soldier who never wanted to be a soldier but won't admit that he's a soldier and Jack being a con-man who was fixed and broken by a doctor and so became a soldier to find his Doctor.

(It's about the fact that after Journey's End happened and the Doctor lost Donna and Rose, he really should have realized what he could have had waiting for him. Maybe gone back and groveled and maybe gotten slapped and then gotten hugged. Or kissed. Or they slept together, if that's your jam.)

#did not mean to ramble for so long #i want to read every fic about them #i want to explore the fucked up dynamic between them #I want Jack and Martha to have comfort sex after the Year that Never Was #i want the Doctor to grovel for forgiveness #i want him to understand that he loves them and actually figure out what to deal with that #never would have happened but a girl can dream #ten x jack x martha #tenmartha #jack x martha #ten x jack #listen just as unhinged as the nine/jack/rose ot3 but WAY less wholesome and way more damaged #captain jack harkness #martha jones #tenth doctor #rotating RENT FREE in my brain #meta #i don't even know if this is proper analysis #i just have some FEELINGS about them okay?

[clonerightsagenda]

Possibly my *least* popular w359 opinion is that postcanon Doug and Miranda are friends and everyone else hates it. The others have all these preconceived notions about who they are/should be, and that has to get stressful. Doug has seen like 5 humans and isn’t an ableist jerk about Miranda’s eyes. Miranda tolerates him because he’s not weird about her. He’s the only one who knows her well enough to notice when her memories start trickling back and doesn’t say anything because that’s not anyone’s business. She offers to make him new lungs. They hated each other for personal reasons. They killed each other. They’re the only ones who understand this aspect of each other. They sit quietly in a room while the rest of the crew is piled outside the door trying to supervise out of paranoia but they are literally Just Hanging Out.

#also there is something both unsettlingly and comfortingly familiar about each other #she knew a more social man who talked to people so she didn't have to #he gave a girl brain damage once and then tried in a very fucked up away to make it right #maybe this time it won't go wrong (because it already did) #perpetual perpetual ladies night #wolf 359 #ok now I will log off for the night I promise #just think it's funny that like. Eiffel and Pryce would both hate this #Doug and Miranda know that