#bro idk I’m putting this down before I make something I might regret

[equizona]

Hiii!! How are you? I hope you are doing great💕✨

I wanted to request headcanons for the bros having a normal dinner at the HoL until Mc who used to have really long hair shows up with a self-cuted bob, you can tell they cutted it by themselves but it’s still cute. When the bros asked about it they responded that they were having a really bad day and they cut their hair as an alternative to self harm.

If you feel uncomfortable you can skip the self harm part! I understand! I was just having a bad day and I decided to cut my hair for the same reasons and my Mamá didn’t take it really nicely, and idk i guess I just want comfort. Thank you I love your writing and again, I hope you have a nice day💕💕✨✨

Scenario: cutting your hair as an alternative to self harm

Note: Hello there! First, I wanna say how proud I am of you, even if I don't know you. The fact you cut your hair instead of cutting is amazing and I am so proud of you. I hope you continue to stay strong, and I'm sorry this took so long! Feel free to contact me if you need someone to talk to. [P.S: I did change the request up but it's mostly the same!]

Fandom: Obey Me!

Character's: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor.

Reader: Kinda G-N! But also has hints that you're most likely a female in this.

Warnings: self harm mentions?

He's very confused.

He does NOT remember you ever leaving the house of lamentation, and your hair was still long earlier this morning.

What happened?

He'll ignore it though.

He'll give you compliments about your hair, and he'll be surprised when you say you cut it on your own.

Tells you that you have talent.

After dinner, he'll ask for you to meet up with him in his office.

He'll immediately ask you why you cut your hair.

Was something wrong? Did you simply want a change? Are you sure you won't regret it? He could find you someone who could grow your hair back out for you if you did?

When you tell him you did that instead of self cutting he's... uncertain on how to feel.

Firstly, he is EXTREMELY proud of you for deciding to do that rather than cut yourself.

He's also a bit disappointed in himself that he didn't notice.

He'll pull you in for a hug, and tell him how proud he is of you for doing that. And how lovely your hair looks short.

He'll tell you to talk to him if you ever feel that you need to cut, and you don't have any other option.

Or if you are simply sad.

He'll get you a therapist if you don't want to speak to him or his brothers.

He'll do almost anything so that you can feel better.

Won't get you knives or things that you can hurt yourself with, but anything else is fair game.

Shocked because why???

Your hair was so nice, and silky! And he loved running his fingers through it and making different hairstyles and all that fun stuff.

He's kinda sad.

But also, you look really good with that hair style?

And you did it on your own?

....ever thought about opening a hair salon? People would pay so much if you had that much talent and skill.

Now, Mammon is most likely the one that is the best on emotions of ALL his brothers.

He can tell when you're not feeling yourself, and it's only like 100 times stronger thanks to the pact you both have.

He'll talk to you when you're both cuddled up in your room, asking you what happened.

When you tell him he'll put the mask he usually has on down and let you know how amazing you are and how proud he is.

Will offer to speak to Lucifer about getting you a therapist, if you'd like.

It won't matter if this is a common way you feel, it only happens once or twice or this only happened once.

He'll do anything you ask of him.

'Cause he loves you more than even money.

Kinda jealous because he' never be able to look good with a hairstyle like that.

And then you're just like

"Oh, I cut it myself."

And he just shirt circuts.

You can cut hair? And even more importantly, your own hair!?!?!?!??!?!

That's so cool!

Why did you never tell him?

At least he's happy that it doesn't seem like any of the others knew about it either.

Now, I honestly feel like Levi's bad thoughts about himself has led him down the path of self harm.

He's surpsingly strong willed, and almost always manages to catch himself and do something else.

And he recognizes what you did as a common thing to do instead.

Asks just to be sure.

And when you tell him that yes, that was why you did it, he's heartbroken.

You don't deserve feelings like that. Actually, you deserve everything good and only the good.

He'll be a lot nicer, doing his best to give you compliments on the new hairstyle and telling you how proud he is.

Mainly fails, but it's okay.

He's trying, and he'll try his best for you to be happy.

<3<3<3<3<3

This man feeds off of anger, so if you did it in a fit of rage or anger, no matter small, he's there in a second to ask how you're doing.

If not? He won't notice. It's only anger he can feel, much to his dismay.

He'll have troubles connecting the dots at first, and will only be handing you out compliments next to Asmo.

Then it hits him that it might be more to it, considering how you're acting.

He'll wait until after dinner and claim you have to help him with something.

Get's really angry when you tell him why you did it.

Not at you though, never at you. At himself, and lucifer, at everything.

He won't keep it up long though, calming down really quickly.

He'll ask you to sit down and read with him, or he'll read to you. Or you can do something on your D.D.D while he reads.

Whatever you want.

Hell, he might decide to let you drag him out somewhere.

Whatever it takes to make you feel even a tiny bit better.

Immediately gushing about how amazing you look with the new hairstyle.

He wants to know where you cut it in the first ten seconds he sees you.

Super shocked when he finds out you did it on your own.

Will ask you to trim his hair sometime.

To be fair, he's no stranger to doing things about his appearance in a fit of strong emotion.

Something Lucifer isn't always the happiest about.

He won't point it out though, if you want to talk, you know he's there.

He drops hints like that, just to be sure.

If you do tell him the reason, he'll immediately pull you in for a hug and shower you in compliments.

Not only on your appearance, but on how amazing you did to cut your hair instead of cutting your skin.

Self care day

He'll push away any of his brothers, doing his best to make you feel the most confident you have ever felt in your own body

Also, he'll make sure you know he's there for you and offer to get a therapist if you'd like one

When it starts to get late he'll put on a movie in the background and cuddle you💞💞💞

He thinks you look great with the new hairstyle!

You looked amazing before as well, but you also look amazing now!

Honestly, he kinda forgets about it during the dinner, a hair cut doesn't change who you are and you're still his very best friend and love of his life

He'll do his normal "get up at 12am and drag you for midnight snacks."

And if you tell him, he'll drop his food and pull you in for a hug

He doesn't say much, but offers you his food.

Whenever he's sad, food makes him feel better, so he does what he knows and hopes it'll share you up too

He'll also be willing to do anything you ask

Want him to carry you? Hug you? Cuddles? Want him to talk to lucifer for you? Want to vent? Want to cry?

He's there for you

Honestly, I doubt he even notices.

He's to busy sleeping to care.

When he DOES notice it's when he drags you down to sleep and tries nuzzling his face into your long hair-

Wait it's gone?

He'll get kinda pissy, 'cause he liked your long hair, but then he noticed it's still super soft and just goes back to sleep

He won't even bring up the possibility that you did it as an alternative to self harm

It crossed his mind but he refuses to believe it

If you tell him, he'll react kinda negatively, and won't talk to you

For like 30 minutes max

Most likely only for like 5 minutes though

He'll realize that he should be there for you

Isn't sure what to do, so he just kinda cuddles you and apologies for how he reacted

He's very lazy put he puts in an extra effort to tell you how proud he is

Because cutting your hair is way better than hurting yourself and you did super good doing the hair cutting instead

He'll let his brothers help you during the day, and have you cuddle with him at night so he can make sure you have the best dreams

I'd say he's horrible at it, but the effort is actually pretty obvious and he makes sure you're guarded in the night

He tries

His best

And it works to some degree

<3

#obey me #obey me headcanons #obey me x reader #obey me angst #obey me fluff #obey me lucifer #obey me lucifer x reader #obey me mammon #obey me mammon x reader #obey me leviathan #obey me leviathan x reader #obey me levi #obey me levi x reader #obey me satan #obey me satan x reader #obey me asmodeus #obey me asmodeus x reader #obey me asmo #obey me asmo x reader #obey me beelzebub #obey me beelzebub x reader #obey me beel #obey me beel x reader #obey me belphegor #obey me belphegor x reader #obey me belphie #obey me belphie x reader

[cosmicpines]

code july day 1 - future

au where jeremie's anti-xana program didn't work, taking place half a year after.

“Do’ya think we should start future-proofing our whole situation?” Odd was the first one to speak out loud in at least a half an hour, his voice echoing around the computer lab.

It was late. Not just “it’s a school night, we should turn off the Playstation” late, but “sunrise is in an hour” late. Ulrich, Jeremie, and Aelita were crowded on the couch – a fairly new addition to the lab that William and Odd had dragged over a mile to the factory after finding it on the street, a several-hour long affair that left them both sore for a week – blearily staring at chunky school-loaned laptop screens with piles of overdue library books on the floor in front of them. Odd and William were across the room, hunched over an oversized posterboard, surrounded by an accoutrement of Odd’s art supplies and printed out sheets of paper. What was keeping them up was potentially world-ending, but not in the usual way; instead of an evil AI, it was a history project due at 10 AM.

It wasn’t entirely their fault they didn’t start earlier – saving the world was a full-time job, afterall – but it’s not like they could give an excuse to Mr. Fumet that he would have believed. As the clock ticked over to 4, the prospect of having to pull the trigger on a return trip to finish loomed over them. They had already done it once, blearily uploading PowerPoint slides to the supercomputer to save them, giving Yumi an apologetic phone call in the morning. She was used to the disorienting resets at this point, having done them for half a year after graduating and moving across the country, but they usually texted ahead of time to warn her. She was sympathetic over the phone – she always was – but she was definitely irritated about having to retake an exam. They didn’t want to put her through that again and, besides, they couldn’t exactly keep the poster board from getting erased to time.

“Future-proofing the fact half of us might fail history?” Ulrich grumbled in response from across the room, leaning against the armrest of the couch. His eyes were glazed over in a stupor as he clicked idly around on the screen.

“Ulrich, are you done with your slides yet?” Aelita spat at him, now that the silent spell was broken, “I want to start stitching them together.”

“Uh… no.” Ulrich glanced at her, subtly turning his screen away from her piercing gaze, “Gimme ten more minutes? I’m almost there.”

Aelita clicked her tongue, probably remembering the last promise of the slides “in ten minutes.” She turned to her left and nudged Jeremie, “How about you – oh my god, Jeremie, can you focus?”

“Huh?” He looked up, and guiltly alt-tabbed back to a blank PowerPoint slide. “Sorry, I was just… I had a breakthrough about the bug in the Skid and I was…” He trailed off under her glare, “Sorry.”

Aelita clutched the side of her head, groaning. “Is it too late to go back to living on Lyoko where I don’t have to care about World War I and don’t need sleep?”

“Me too, thanks.” William muttered at Odd’s side, aggressively erasing a sentence on the poster, “Being XANA’s slave was less painful than this.”

He let out a bitter laugh, then raised his head, half smirk fading at the frozen-in-terror looks on his friend’s faces, “Sorry. Too soon?”

Odd, as he so often did, interrupted the awkward silence before people could make it worse, “Future-proofing us, is what I meant. Thanks for asking!” Nobody humored him as the typing across the room started back up and William started writing again, “Look, I’m just saying; we’re not getting any younger.” He brandished a red marker, filling in bubble letters on the top of the poster, “Yumi graduated. We’ve only got a semester left at Kadic –,”

“Could just all repeat a year like I did.” William grimaced. “And might again.”

Ulrich snorted, “Odd and I are probably on track for that.”

“Cheers,” William said, raising his pencil like a glass, without looking up, “Join the failure club.”

“BUT,” Odd interrupted, “Assuming we don’t! Because this presentation is going to be incredible,” That one earned a snort from everyone in the room (which was fair), “We’ll need someone who can do our jobs if we have to leave the good fight. Lyoko Warriors, the Next Generation! Kadic’s Next Top Lyoko Warriors!” He chuckled at himself, standing up, “We should put an ad in the paper: ‘Want a challenging, world-altering job? Come down to the abandoned factory!’” He hummed to himself, tapping his chin, “Our criteria would have to be strict. Can you imagine getting someone like, I dunno, Johnny? So, Johnny. Please, tell me: what’s your greatest fear? Giant crabs, you say? Why yes, that’s both oddly specific and also a dealbreaker. Next!”

Odd looked up, laughing, waiting for his friends to join in – Ulrich telling him he was being dumb, Aelita offering some other students and joking with him about their interviews, William making a snide remark about how he didn’t get an interview, a silent, but appreciative smirk from Jeremie – but got nothing. Jeremie’s head was buried in his laptop, and Aelita was – Aelita was glaring at him?

“What?” He asked her, but she said nothing, just raised an eyebrow in a you know what’s wrong look. Odd clearly didn’t, and turned to Ulrich for a clue, but Ulrich wasn’t giving him anything; he was just back to sulking, staring at his laptop. Odd ran through what he said again in his head, trying to find the offending phrase, when William punched him in the leg. “Hey –,” Odd started, ready to give a snappy retort, before seeing William was urgently tapping at the poster, where he’d just written something. Odd crouched down to read it.

you’re upsetting jeremie.

Odd glanced back at Einstein across the room, whose face was impassive, just typing away. Looking closer, though, he could see Jeremie had all the appearances of someone trying valiantly to pretend they weren’t upset – hunched shoulders, scrunched up face, not a single glance away from the screen. Aelita had stopped glaring to put a hand on Jeremie’s shoulder, but he shrugged it off.

Ugh. Odd sighed, wondering if he would have to apologize for just trying to lighten the mood. How was anything he said upsetting to Jeremie? He reached over for a pencil to respond to William, scribbling down on the poster.

Can’t he take a joke?

idk. Guess he thinks you’re blaming him.

Blaming him?? For what???? bro when did I even say anything like that??

you didn’t. don’t bro me bro. not my fault

Odd underlined his first bro, giving William a smile. William rolled his eyes before rubbing out their conversation with an eraser. Odd turned back to his coloring job and took a breath, surprised to see it come in shaky. It’s not your fault he’s upset, he thought to himself, pulling the cap off his marker. It’s fine. He leaned over to finish his coloring before noticing his hands were shaking. He clenched them, angrily. It wasn’t his fault Jeremie was upset. He was fine. Not his fault if Jeremie wanted to over-react. He’ll get over it and… where were the scissors?

He dug around their supplies for them, then, picking up a pile of pictures of historic figures, streaked from the bad library printer, took a pair of trembling scissors to extracting them. They were nearly done. One more section and they’d be done. One more and they could go to bed and Jeremie would get over whatever he was upset about and it was fine and it would all go away and it was fine it wasn’t his fault and –

“I’m working as hard as I can,” Odd felt a bit in his stomach open up as Jeremie spoke in a quiet, bitter voice. Odd stared pointedly down at the poster, blinking rapidly to try and assuage the pressure building behind his eyes, “I know we screwed up by not finishing before Yumi graduated, okay? I’m just… It’s a lot to figure out and I’m trying?! Is that not enough for – No. No, I know it’s not enough – I know I’m keeping us from having a normal life and it’s my fault William had to repeat a year and… and I –,” Jeremie’s breath caught, and Odd finally dared to turn his eyes to him, seeing his friend aggressively rubbing his eyes under his glasses, “I – I don’t mean to – look! It’s hard, alright?! It’s hard and I – I’m just so tired all the time and I’m sorry that we’re still awake for this too and that I –,” His voice finally broke as he started crying in earnest, his fist coming down on the side of the couch. Odd wanted to turn back to his work and brush it off, but the guilt clenching his stomach wasn’t letting go.

Hesitantly, Aelita put her hand on his shoulder again, “Jeremie…” but he shook it off again, turning away from her. She persisted. “It’s not your fault. We know you’re working –,”

“And it’s not enough! I’ve been working at this for years and I just I can’t come up with anything to defeat XANA –,”

“You had a lot of other things you needed to do first.”

He didn’t mean to, Odd was sure, but Ulrich’s eyes flickered to William for just a moment, and William’s eyes narrowed.

“Oh, are we doing this now?” William grumbled, dropping his pencil. “Jeremie, you’re fine. Look, I’m sorry. Again. You don’t think I don’t regret every moment that I didn’t listen like a fucking idiot –” Jeremie, despite being wracked with tears, winced at the swear, earning a brief hint of a smile from Odd, “ – and got myself captured? Who then was a thorn in your asses for months? No. I get it. You’d probably be rid of XANA already if it wasn’t for me; you’ve made that crystal clear.”

“That’s not what I –,” Aelita glared at him, “You of all people should understand that I would never blame you for being trapped on Lyoko.”

“It’s not you that is. It’s him.” He jerked his thumb at Ulrich, who glared back at him.

“I’m not,” Ulrich muttered, “Cut it out.”

“Oh yeah? What did that look mean then, huh?”

“I didn’t –,”

“You blame me, and we all know it. You’re just butt-hurt over Yumi still, even though you had plenty of chances –,”

“Okay, that’s it.” Ulrich sat up straighter, “Maybe you’re still using Yumi as a scapegoat in all our arguments, but I’m done with that. Maybe I was an ass to you before because of her, but I don’t blame you for XANA, William. I never have. I was over it before you even joined,” He scowled at the ground, Jeremie’s crying filling the brief silence. “It was probably my fault you got captured in the first place. I wasn’t there because I had to talk to my stupid Dad and it was my job to tell Odd and I didn’t make sure – hell, even before that! Who was it that couldn’t protect Aelita back when XANA escaped from the supercomputer in the first place? If she hadn’t been alone, the Scyphozoa wouldn’t have gotten her, and XANA wouldn’t have escaped, and we would have been done.”

“Come on,” Aelita crossed her arms, turning away from Jeremie to the boy on her other side, “You’re being ridiculous. Half of that isn’t your fault.”

Odd wanted to chime in that it was Sam’s fault she didn’t listen to Ulrich, but his voice was still missing in action, his throat tight and unresponsive.

“I should have been able to protect myself,” Aelita continued, “It wasn’t your responsibility –,”

Jeremie laughed suddenly, hurt and bitter, “Protect yourself how? You couldn’t protect yourself because I was dragging my feet on giving you a proper weapon –,”

“We’ve talked about this!” She said, “We agreed it was more worth your time to work on an antivirus!”

“For a virus that didn’t exist! If I had just double checked –,”

“Double checked what? The faulty data you were being fed? There was nothing you could have done! If you want to blame anyone, blame me. Maybe it – maybe helping me made sense at first, when things were able to be stopped at a moment’s notice. But then even when you got me to Earth it wasn’t over, and things got worse, things got more dangerous – when we realized XANA could escape? That we couldn’t just turn it off with a switch? That – that should have been it.” Her voice dropped as she took a shaky breath, “You should have just let me turn the supercomputer off.”

“You were ALWAYS worth the risk, Aelita!” Odd finally snapped, terror shooting through his heart at the broken look on her face, the implications of her words, “You… you matter to us more than anything! Look, I’m sorry for bringing this all up, alright? I thought we could just joke around about running Lyoko Warrior interviews! I didn’t mean to get everyone upset. And speaking of! Jeez! All of you are such downers on yourselves! There’s like, a billion different things that could have happened!” He held out a hand, ticking them off, “Maybe William might not have gotten captured and instead XANA got Yumi or anyone else! Maybe, I dunno, Ulrich saved Aelita temporarily but then XANA tossed him in the digital sea! Maybe Jeremie could have noticed that Aelita didn’t have a virus sooner, and XANA just made a move sooner! Maybe – maybe – maybe if you had just let Kiwi be virtualized normally and not fuse with me he would have been a great Lyoko Warrior and would have bit the Scyphozoa and killed XANA! We don’t know, alright? I’m just trying to say that – ugh, forget it! Sorry! Jeez!”

Odd rubbed at his eyes, surrendering to the frustrated and exhausted stream of tears that leaked out of them. All of them, all of this – he kept trying to play superhero, to pretend that everything was going to be alright like in the movies, but in his heart he had to admit that this was starting to feel futile. Aelita’s virus, XANA’s escape from the supercomputer, William’s capture, Jeremie’s first botched attempt at his anti-XANA program, Franz Hopper’s sacrifice, Yumi’s graduation, their failure to stop space station from falling, Jeremie’s second anti-XANA program getting stolen by the AI, and now the looming threat of their own graduation… he wanted to be joking about needing to interview new Lyoko Warriors, really, but if graduation took them away from the factory… away from each other…

A hand landed on his shoulder, he realized he didn’t need to know who it was to press his own on top of it, to squeeze it and feel loved, as more hands, more friends, found their way to his other shoulder, to his back.

“I’m sorry, Jeremie,” he said, “And everyone else. I didn’t mean to –,”

“Don’t,” came a muttered reply from Jeremie, “We’re all acting tired and stupid. I shouldn’t have yelled. I knew you didn’t mean it.”

Odd let out an exhausted laugh, rubbing his eyes of the last of the tears, looking up and seeing his friends around him, “How late is it?”

“Too late,” Ulrich replied, pulling his phone out of his pocket, “We’ve got… three hours until classes start.”

A collective groan broke the spell over the room. Odd looked under his feet to the almost-finished-poster. Silently, all of them returned to their working positions. Odd kneeled down to finish gluing down the last of the faces to the poster. As the lull of busy work started taking over his mind, William nudged him.

“Sorry, I, uh…” William looked uncharacteristically bewildered, “This must have happened while I was – did you say Kiwi fused with you?”

#i am well aware that it is long past day one LOL #we'll see what else i get to #my intent going into this was to write exactly what odd wanted to joke about but then i realized that was kinda fucked up #codejuly #codejuly21 #code lyoko #i swear ill write fluff next i promise #mary blabs

[katierosefun]

well, even though literally no one asked, am i going to do a whole analysis on how the red album is also lowkey about tcw? sure. sh, let me indulge 12/13 year old me.

state of grace:

our wonderful opening track. the lyrics “just twin fire signs / four blue eyes”—from this line alone, i think a lot about anakin and ahsoka and obi-wan, just because what color are their eyes? blue. check and mate.

but on a more serious level: “and i never saw you coming / and i’ll never be the same” speaks to how each of these characters’ lives were interrupted by the presence of the other. obi-wan certainly didn’t expect anakin to come into his life, and i doubted anakin ever expected ahsoka to come into his life.

“love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right” and “these are the hands of fate / you’re my Achilles heel” speaks to how this whole theme of love and how both raw and burning and ruthless love can shine in this specific universe. specifically anakin’s kind of love. additionally, the idea of Achilles heel...i’ve already discussed the parallels between Achilles and anakin and don’t feel like rehashing, but it’s def. worth noting.

“this is the golden age of something good and right and real”...golden age. the war was messy and terrible and shouldn’t have ever happened, but also, i think for that brief moment, disaster lineage was at least together.

red

look me in the eye and lie to me about how this song doesn’t sum up the exhilarating rush that must have been being around someone like anakin skywalker.

“losing him was blue like i’ve ever known / missing him was dark grey all alone / forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met / but loving him was red”: this entire refrain is about that kind of ruthless, very fiery-seeing-red-everywhere kind of sensation that comes with love. (or, as the song alludes, a kind of dangerous love.)

and if we’re talking about dangerous kind of love—“fighting with him was like trying to solve a crossword and realizing there’s no right answer / regretting him was like wishing you never found out love could be that strong”...thinking thoughts about how there must have been all these times for the people around anakin to clash heads. bro. what even is that.

“remembering him comes in flashbacks, in echoes / told myself it’s time now, gotta let go”. ha ha. you ever think about the people who live after order 66 and wonder what the hell happened to the person they loved. ha.

treacherous

alright, time to put on the anidala hat. this song is supposed to be all about loving someone and constantly feeling like you’re sliding down a slippery slope. a treacherous path—a reckless path—and yet, and yet, “i like it”.

the whole concept of these two being put in a whirlwind romance matches perfectly with these lyrics: “i can’t decide if it’s a choice / getting swept away / i hear the sound of my own voice / asking you to stay”. this mess of a relationship that probably shouldn’t have happened, but it happened, and now the only choice for these two is to hold on...bro.

i knew you were trouble.

ohhhh god, do i need to explain how this is an anidala song or—

“i was in your sights / you got me alone / you found me”,,,the fact that anakin skywalker really looked at padmé amidala after ten years and automatically went “i love her”. a part of me will always sigh and want to pat anakin’s head that please, please, please control yourself, but what am i supposed to do anyways—

but also, the way this song also addresses all the dangerous things that come with a love that probably shouldn’t have started / shouldn’t have been born with so many secrets. the damning / basically self-loathing lyrics like “the joke is on me” and “shame on me now” is honestly kind of sad, and while i don’t think padmé ever regretted loving anakin (and i’ve covered this so many times, but i think anakin and padmé genuinely loved each other), there was def. a sense of constant danger and fear that one day, all the secrets will come tumbling out / something’s going to happen. and all that ultimately bubbles over in revenge of the sith, right when padmé looks at anakin and just doesn’t see him anymore.

all too well

tbh, this song deserves a whole long post on its own, but i’ll try to be concise. i genuinely think this could be about any of the tcw characters / tcw pairings, but because it’s my post and my obsession, i’ll discuss the disaster lineage. there’s something so quietly sad about the line “but you still got [my scarf] in your drawer, even now” and how that speaks to how obi-wan has anakin’s lightsaber / how anakin has ahsoka’s lightsaber both as himself and as ahsoka after ahsoka left the order / after order 66. the fact that you still have a piece of someone you love(d), long after they’re gone...

the fact that this song is so full of memories and longing and aching and grief over a loved relationship. thinking about the lyrics “you tell me about your past, thinking your future was me” is especially sad because while i don’t think anakin was ever completely open about his childhood / past, i like to think he must have told some stories to obi-wan and padmé and ahsoka about happier moments—and you have to wonder what kind of future anakin saw for himself with his loved ones.

“maybe this thing was a masterpiece until you tore it all up” speaks to how for a rare, rare moment, we see anakin skywalker as the hero we’re all supposed to like—and we see how it all crumbles apart so fast.

“but you keep my old scarf from that very first week / because it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me” hits especially hard when you think about how vader still has ahsoka’s lightsabers, or the fact that everything goes “back to when i loved you so / back before you lost the one real thing you’ve ever known”...thinking. a lot about anakin and how the love he felt / received from his friends were real, realer than anything that palpacreep could ever give him. it was all real, and now they’re all memories.

22

okay, this is just a fun song so i can’t really apply it anywhere, but i like to think there must have been a birthday somewhere along the line / some kind of happy event where there’s some chaotic tcw fam shenanigans. ditching the whole scene and “end[ing] up dreaming instead of sleeping”...i like to think they must have had some kind of happy moment like that.

i almost do

this song honestly reminds me the most of anakin and ahsoka. do you ever think that ahsoka might have wanted to reach out to anakin at some point? how “it takes everything in me not to call you”—how she might wish that she could talk to him again but every time she doesn’t, she almost does. (and ha. this makes their S7 reunion even more painful.)

the whole “i bet you think i either moved on or hate you” and “i bet it never ever occurred to you that i can’t say hello to you and risk another goodbye” speaks mostly to that very same reunion. the fact that ahsoka and anakin leave so many things unsaid—the fact that ahsoka restrains herself, cites that reason for the fact that they’ll just catch up another time...when that another time never happens.

we are never ever getting back together

hahaa, i can’t quite laugh about this but also i can because i kinda made a crack edit of disaster lineage + this song over the summer, and it really is just a joke but also...lol vader + ahsoka + obi-wan, but more specifically ahsoka and vader in their reunion in rebels lol. they’re never getting back together, geddit? they “used to think [they] were forever” and “[sigh] he calls me up again and is like i still love you and like,,,this is exhausting, you know?” yeah, me too sis. 🙄

stay stay stay

okay, okay, okay, maybe going a little bit into crack-y happy tcw feelings, but all i’m saying is that i love the image of these dorks staying for each other, you know? the whole “you took the time to memorize me” and “all those times that you didn’t leave / it’s been occurring to me i’d like to hang out with you for my whole life” and “no one else is gonna love me when i get mad” makes me kinda soft but also sad knowing that one of the tragedies of tcw fam is that no one really stays.

the last time

highkey the whole clovis arc in season 6. but anyways, especially the lines about “this is the last time i’m asking you this / put my name at the top of your list” speaks a lot to me about this hunger (yeah, this is @ anakin) to be someone’s first choice. it’s about the anger and jealousy and dull pain of knowing that everyone else’s priorities are elsewhere (and that’s not their fault, but you still feel like it is).

but if we’re thinking about the clovis arc especially, i think a whole lot about anakin + padmé, as well as anakin and obi-wan, esp. in these lyrics: “you wear your best apology / but i was there to watch you leave” and “all those times i let you in / just for you to go again”. we know anakin and padmé were...going through it in this arc, but specially anakin and obi-wan’s conversation—the one where obi-wan’s trying to reach anakin? we see obi-wan briefly open up (ie. about satine!) and anakin quickly shuts it down, and when obi-wan leaves, we see the pain on both of their faces because this wasn’t how the conversation was supposed to go.

but also, if we’re circling back to anakin and padmé’s relationship in this arc especially: the really, really painful lyrics about “this is the last time you tell me i’ve got it wrong” and “this is the last time i say it’s been you all along” and “this is the last time i let you in my door” and “this is the last time / i won’t hurt you anymore”...this arc truly explores just how deep the hurt can run when you have a secret relationship. how quickly love can blur into possession and jealousy and anger, and we see that in how anakin and padmé just...both crumble apart, especially in that one bit when padmé basically says she doesn’t want to see anakin for a little while. like. idk. it’s just sad, because this arc really showed just all the issues and problems within a relationship built on lies.

holy ground

oh god, what a fun song. but anyways, just to kick things off: “and darling, it was good / never looking down / and right there where we stood / was holy ground” speaks to a relationship that was good, even if it was wild and brief. which. disaster lineage.

the whole “i guess we fall apart in the usual way / and the story’s got dust on every page” and “i see your face in every crowd” vibe too—these idiots miss each other, and they probably see each other where they’re not supposed to. there was nothing unusual about their falling apart, of course, but something about this song compels me to think about how even in the grief and pain that ultimately drags ahsoka and obi-wan down especially, i think they still are fond of their happier memories with anakin.

also, “tonight i’m gonna dance for all we’ve been through” and “but i don’t wanna dance if i’m not dancing you” makes me a little sad because i think a lot about the fall of the empire and how the whole galaxy is out celebrating, but there’s a certain togruta woman who can’t completely celebrate because now she knows that. her whole family. really is gone.

sad beautiful tragic

this whole song is so tragic, but. anyways. more tragic disaster lineage vibes. the words “words, how little they mean / when you’re a little too late” makes me want to scream because i think a lot about how in rebels, ahsoka tells vader that she won’t leave him—not this time—and obi-wan crying that he loved anakin—the real tragedy here is that these were all words that anakin should have known deep down, but he didn’t, and they all felt late. their timing is terrible.

and “in dreams, i meet you in warm conversation” screams to me this one passage about how obi-wan dreams about anakin, although those dreams are anything but warm. but the idea of how obi-wan still dreams and how “time is taking its sweet time erasing you”—because in the kenobi novel especially, obi-wan explicitly struggles...a lot with anakin’s loss. he definitely gets...sad and tries to remember how the hell it all happened. he keeps pulling out anakin’s lightsaber and just. forcibly puts it away because he knows looking at it would cause just more grief and oh yikes.

the lucky one

ngl i forgot how fuckign good this song is,,,bro. anyways, i think this def. speaks to the og prequel trilogy trio especially, because i think they were all seriously going through with the whole...reputation thing. thinking mostly about how anakin, padmé, and obi-wan are all supposed to be these heroic / cool / beautiful figures who everyone’s supposed to look up to when in reality, they were all struggling with something. also lol the fact that obi-wan and anakin were both propped up as war propaganda figures in-universe because of palpacreep def. speaks to that whole “they’ll tell you now you’re the lucky one”.

and “they tell you that you’re lucky / but you’re so confused because you don’t feel pretty, you just feel used” and “you wonder if you’ll make it out alive” hurts the most, i think, just because how they apply to all those in prequel trilogy. anakin, obi-wan, and padmé—not to mention all the other jedi and the clones, oh god, the clones—were all fighting a war that ultimately didn’t matter, and they were all fighting a war that didn’t leave them as heroes. it just left them as pawns.

but i think if there’s any hope—any hope at all in this song, i think it’s in the last lyrics: “and they still tell the legend of how you disappeared / how you took the money and your dignity and got the hell out” reminds me the most of probably ahsoka and rex, or the people who survived the mess that was the clone wars. granted, rex didn’t exactly have the choice that ahsoka had, because she was the one who really made the big decision to look around herself and say “nope, i can’t be a part of this order”. she got the hell out.

everything has changed

hear me out, but i just think this makes for a cute anakin and ahsoka song, esp. their very cute beginnings. just like. as soon as they meet each other, both of them are ultimately changed. the fact that ahsoka has been noted to be the key to understanding who anakin is—the fact that it’s ahsoka’s relationship / interactions with anakin that ultimately makes him a better person because they’re siblings, your honor—yeah. very much the cute “all i know is we said hello”...the lyrics going on about “i just wanna know you better” and “your eyes look like coming home” makes me soft because. i think that while yes, they had their own rocky beginning, the difference between anakin and ahsoka’s relationship vs. anakin and obi-wan’s (rip i love anakin and obi-wan and i genuinely believe that obi-wan was the best teacher for anakin, and i think their bond is incredibly special, but.......boys please communicate better) is that i think anakin makes a really explicit effort to make sure ahsoka knows that like. he wants her around.

idk—i’m not saying obi-wan didn’t want anakin around! but i think one of the greatest tragedies of their relationship is that anakin always seemed to just. not click with obi-wan’s own demonstrations of love / i want you to be here messages. (the gambit duology goes a little more into this—only in those books, anakin and obi-wan actually talk a little about their feelings! which is nice!) but anyways, point being: anakin and ahsoka really looked at each other and were like “oh yeah. you’re my idiot now.” and i think that’s really cool of them.

starlight

oh god, this is kind of an anidala song but i also am tempted to say obitine song just because of that one line about “pretending to be a duchess and a prince” because,,,lol duchess geddit? and overall just think it’s really cute because. summer love!!!

but also, i do see this as an anidala song because “he was trying to skip rocks on the ocean, saying to me / don’t you dream impossible things?” because i see anakin as most certainly that dreamy-eyed boy who looks at padmé and is just. like that. (and we see a whole ton of that, esp. in aotc and how padmé initially is like “this is a terrible idea” and eventually winds up falling in love anyways, as one does.)

begin again

this song is odd because it doesn’t really give me overwhelming star wars feelings, but it does remind me a little bit of how ahsoka must have felt getting with the rebels crew. because i think ahsoka must have “watched it begin again” when she noted kanan and ezra’s interactions with each other, and i feel like when she’s with ezra, she sees a lot of the young padawan she used to be, and i think there must have been a point where she recognizes that “what’s past is past”. she’s watching everything begin again.

the moment i knew

this is another one of those songs that makes me sad about anidala because it seems like they’re always getting interrupted? the idea of being told that someone’s going to show but it might not happen because life (ie. war! there’s a war!),,,and still not being able to be really that sad about it in public makes me sad. just. i’m reminded of this one moment in tcw where anakin has to leave early because of something and just. the lyrics “what do you do when the one who means the most to you is the one who didn’t show”—like, of course, we see anakin sneaking off, but i def. think in that one tcw episode, we get a glimpse of. how lonely life might be if you’re just. waiting for someone to come home, only to realize that they might not show.

come back...be here

ha....hahahahaa weirdly both anakin and ahsoka and obitine feelings? give me a second.

okay, so as for anakin and ahsoka first: “i can’t help but wish you took me with you” hits hard just because of the time anakin tells ahsoka that he knows what it feels like to want to leave the order. just. oh god.

and then there’s this bit of “this is when the feeling sinks in / i don’t wanna miss you like this” hits hard, esp. considering the whole utapau arc where anakin accidentally slips in ahsoka’s name. he misses her, and i don’t think he really wanted to show that—but it sinks in so hard and fast for him, and it hurts so much oh god

also, the “right when i was just about to fall”: i know that in this context, fall is supposed to mean falling in love, but. the fact that anakin is literally about to fall like,,,a few days after his reunion with ahsoka. i cry now!

as for obitine: ahahahaha. pain, esp. considering how they probably separated after their year on the run? thinking about how that goodbye must have been like—mostly thinking about how there’s so much history between the two. how strange it is that they “didn’t know each other at all”, and how they might have had “the feeling they could know so much without knowing anything at all”, and now i think about how both of them could have “stumbled through the long goodbye”. i think a lot about those years of separation and how satine confesses how she had been in love with obi-wan for a long time—and how that in itself...wondering how or when satine knew for certain that she had fallen in love with the young jedi who came to her aid. thinking about how her “falling in love in the cruelest way” is how that whole falling in love—and realizing just how in love she was—is so cruel, because like. you know. when you’ve been in love / are loving someone for like...ten years....that’s kinda intense ngl

girl at home

lol this song doesn’t really fit with anything star wars related because i don’t think anyone in tcw would actually cheat on their loved ones? still 100000/10 a bop of a song though, and i still think it’s one of swift’s more mature songs, 10000/10 recommend.

#caroline talks #my essay #can you believe i spent 2.5 hours writing this

[belovedbangtan]

DIVE : Part 2

<Part 1>

Pairings: Jungkook x y/n, Yoongi x oc

Word Count: 4.4k

Description: Camping with your ex, sounds horrible right? The camping trip was planned and payed for long before y/n’s shitty boyfriend broke up with her. Her best friend Abby, Yoongi, Taehyung, Jimin, and Jungkook are there to make sure she has an amazing time. However, sharing a tent with a smoke show like Jungkook is bound to lead to some complications.

Warnings: Language, lap dance, streaking, alcohol use, dom!Jk, sub!yn, fingering.

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When you wake up the next morning, Jungkook is already gone. You quickly start to brush your hair and make yourself look somewhat presentable before anyone has the chance to see you. You brush your hair, putting it in a simple braid to the side. You shuffle though your bag of clothes pulling out a baggy t-shirt and another pair of jean shorts. You jump when you hear the zip of the tent as you’re pulling the shorts over your hips.

“Sup Sexy lady.” Abby sings as she barges inside, plopping down on the air mattress.

“Fuck, you scared me. I thought you were Jungkook,” You scold as you pull the shirt over your bralette.

“Wait,” she sits up and looks around with a disgusted look on her face, “Should I be on this mattress?”

“Oh my god. We definitely didn’t sleep together if that’s what you’re implying.” You roll your eyes as you fold Jungkook’s blanket.

Abby’s lower lip jets out, “But why not.” She pretends to wipe a tear away.

“Uhm, idk maybe because I haven’t even talked to the dude.”

“Well… Kook, Tae, Jimin and Yoongi all want to go Horseback riding if you,” She wiggles her eyebrows, “would like to talk to ‘the dude’,” She rolls her eyes as she quotes me.

“And you’re ex is doing something with his group of douches.”

“Okay, that sounds fun.”

You both left the tent and met up with the boys who were waiting patiently for you by the SUV. When you got there you instantly noticed the way Jungkook’s eyes made their way up your body. When his eyes meet yours you quickly look away. Tae holds the door open for you as you approach, you slide in and he slides in after you.

“I almost punched your ex in the mouth last night.” Tae blurts out unexpectantly.

“What the fuck!” You gasp but you can’t help but laugh at the image of that. It’s definitely something you wouldn’t mind seeing. Tae starts to explain that after you had fallen asleep he came over to their beer pong game, and started to trash talk you.

“Kept saying that ‘it’s pathetic that she came to babysit me’ and shit like that. Like he deadass believes you’re here to win him back.” Tae’s eyes roll into the back of his head.

You take a deep breath, unsure of how to process the new information. If you were being honest, you didn’t think he thought about you at all. So for him to bring you up in conversation was a bit unexpected, and out of character. However, him claiming that you were there to ‘babysit him’ was something you could definitely hear him saying.

“You aren’t here to get him back are you?” Tae’s eyes widen as he looks over at you, “Because I definitely did not say nice things to him.” His presses his lips together thinking he might have fucked up.

“Are you kidding? No. Not a chance in hell.” You scoff.

“Good. You deserve better than that asshole, I can’t believe how close we used to be. Fuck… Jungkook was best friends with him when they were kids.” Jimin blurts out.

You slowly turn around to make eye contact with Jungkook. How did you not know this information. After being with Ben for nearly a year, you had no clue. Jungkook looks up at you raising his eyebrows and nodding as if to tell you that it was true, and definitely not something he liked to talk about.

“So, if you don’t like him, why do you guys hang out?” you ask the obvious question, hoping for a simply explanation.

“I mean, we’re still friends with people in his group of friends. So when we have big events, he’s always there,” Jimin explains he shrugs, “I guess we haven’t really thought about it much until now.”

You nod, looking out the window. You think about it and it makes sense. Anytime you went to a gathering, things were always awkward between Ben and the boys. Most of Ben’s friends would talk to them casually, and it was never awkward or uncomfortable. You remember Abby warning you before you were brainwashed into giving him a chance. She couldn’t give a reason to say no to him, you assumed because she didn’t know him well enough. Eventually she reasoned and backed off, telling you that she would support whatever decision you made.

After a short ride you finally arrive to the stables. You go inside and pay, then the instructors designate a horse for each person. The instructor brings over a beautiful grey horse, named Eve. You lightly pat her before your instructor helps you over. After everyone has mounted  their horse, you start on the trail. Side by side, Yoongi was next to Abby, Tae next to Jimin, then Jungkook was next to you. The instructors were ahead and behind the group to make sure the horses were behaving properly.

The trail you chose was supposed to take you to the top of the mountain to a lookout. You definitely didn’t anticipate the rocky terrain, or the feeling that you would fall off the horse. After a few minutes you peak over when you hear a quiet laugh coming from Jungkook.

“What’s so funny?” you blurt out, still maintaining your stiff posture.

“Are you scared?” He looks over at you with a smirk plastered across his face.

“No,” You attempt to loosen your grip, instantly regretting the decision to do so, “and if I was, should you really be laughing at me?” You mumble breathlessly.

He giggles, “No. Probably not,” You watch him as he pushes his lips out in attempt to hide the apparent humor in his features, “Look, just relax. You’re not going to fall off.” He lets go of the harness and leans back. He wiggles his body to show you that it’s okay to move.

“Eve, you’re not gonna let y/n fall are you,” He leans forward asking your horse with a voice sweeter than honey, “Yeah, see… she said no. So just relax, babe.” He says calmly.

You giggle as he attempts to distract you, you don’t miss the way the nickname makes your body heat up, “Okay, okay,” you sit up and roll your neck, loosening your body one limb at a time, “this better? Do I look like a pro?” You giggle, you’re knuckles still white from your tight grip on harness.

He laughs hard this time, “Mhm, definitely a Pro. The cutest Horseback rider I’ve ever seen, that’s for sure.”

Your cheeks turn a deep shade of red and you try your hardest to maintain your composure.

“So you used to be best friends with Ben?” You ask quietly hopefully changing the subject.

He sighs loudly, looking off in the distance, “Unfortunately.” He responds quietly.

You nod, clearly not wanted to press on if he was uncomfortable. He clears his throat,

“Our parents were good friends. We stayed friends through school, until he slept with not 1, not 2, but 3 of my girlfriends.” He laughed to himself, shaking his head in disapproval, “And he would tell me, it wasn’t his fault my girls were such whores.” He mumbles.

You bite your lip, closing your eyes for just a moment. You couldn’t believe you wasted an entire year with someone as disgusting as him. You wondered if he cheated on you while you were with him. More than anything you were pissed that someone would do that to their so called friend. You couldn’t imagine the pain that must’ve cause Jungkook.

“That’s fucking awful, I’m sorry he did that.” You apologize even though you know it won’t mean anything.

“No its fine, just made me realize what a piece of shit he is. Just sucks we still have the same friend groups.”

“He is most definitely a piece of shit,” You chuckle, at least you can agree with that.

“Yeah I don’t know why someone like you even entertained someone like him for that long.”

All you hear him say is ‘someone like you’ and you need to know what that means. You pause before asking because you’re not sure you’re even ready to hear his answer.

“Someone like me?”

He smiles, “Yeah, you know. Someone smart, caring, down to earth, beautiful,” He pauses to look over at you, “the whole package, some might say.”

You look over at him in complete shock, you nod your head slowly looking for the words to follow up, but you can’t find them.

“Some might say?” You hear Tae laugh from the horse in front of you, “Bro, you’re the one that says that.”

Jungkook eyes him down and Tae knows that once they’re off of these horses his ass his grass.

You cant help but to laugh at the two boys, “I’m mean, I’m not sure I agree with that but… I can agree with the fact that we were definitely not a great match.”

Jungkook nods, his cheeks are rosy and you smile to yourself as you think about him getting embarrassed over Tae calling him out.

“Thanks for covering me up last night,” you whisper loud enough for Jungkook to hear. Not wanting to involve Tae and Jimin in our conversation they were clearly eves dropping on.

His cheeks turn impossibly rosier, “No problem, you looked cold.”

“I was,” you smile and he smiles back, “I should have taken you up on your offer to sleep on the air mattress with you, my back was fucked this morning.” You giggle

“So does that mean you’re going to let me cuddle with you tonight?” He asks without a beat.

The rosiness on his cheeks is gone, and dominant Jungkook is back and sending shock waves through your body once again.

“I guess it does.” You agree. You’d be crazy to say no to him. The fact that all you could think about as you slept was cuddling with him didn’t help either.

You finally get to the top of the mountain, and you watch everyone dismount their horses with ease. Jungkook get off and brushes his hair out of his eyes as he walks over to you. He holds his hand out for you to take. When you swing your leg over, he takes you in his arms and set you on the ground. His face a few inches from yours you wonder what would happen if you just closed the gap and let your lips touch. His eyes look from yours down to your lips as if he’s considering the same thing. He brings his hand up to your cheek, cupping it for a moment before he brushes something away along your cheek bone.

“You had some dirt.” He smirks, yet his hand doesn’t leave your face.

“Could you two keep it in your pants for a few more hours?” you hear Jimin whining from the lookout. You both pull away and laugh as you start walking towards the group. Abby pulls beers out of her backpack passing them out to everyone. You know you probably shouldn’t considering you haven’t eaten but you know she’ll call you out if you don’t. Every part of your body wants to look at Jungkook, wants to know if he’s looking at you.

After the instructors take a group picture of you all at the lookout, you get back on your horses and head back to the stables. Tae and Jimin decided to lead a sing-along on the way back, which you were thankful for. You needed time to process all the flirting between you and Jungkook. You clearly didn’t mind it but, part of your brain was screaming to slow down. Jungkook seemed like someone you could actually fall in love with and that scared the fuck out of you. You didn’t even feel that way the entire time you were with Ben, which was even scarier. The thought of you and Jungkook cuddling tonight makes you feel things you haven’t felt in a long time. A mixture of nerves and excitement confusing your brain. Hopefully, the rest of the day would ease your mind about the decision you already made.

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 A few hours later you’re all sitting around the campfire. Ben and his group of friends return from their activities and you instantly begin drinking more than you should. Each drop of tequila making your brain a little fuzzier. Jungkook walks over to you, with a shot of tequila and a hot dog.

You’re eyes widen as notice the shot, “For me!?” you squeal reaching out for the shot of tequila, only to be smacked on the hand.

“No, you need to eat before you have more Tequila,” he chuckles as he hands you the hotdog. You roll your eyes dramatically.

“You’re no fun, Kookie,” You pout and you take note of the way the nickname makes him blush. You want to make him blush like that a million times more. You wonder what other nicknames make him blush.

“Awe princess, I can be fun. I promise.” He reassured you, licking his lips as he puts the shot of Tequila to his lips and tilts his head back. You know you’re staring but you can’t help it. Everything about him was pulling you in. You turn away and you eat the hotdog because he was right. You choose to ignore the fact that he paid enough attention to know that you needed to eat something. The fact that he paid that much attention at all was mind blowing to you.

As you finish eating, one of the girls that’s in Ben’s group of friends starts a game of truth or dare. She demands that everyone has to play, instantly making your roll your eyes. Abby pulls her chair up next to yours, Yoongi, Tae, and Jimin follow her lead. Jungkook decides to sit on your left. The girl who starts the game, decides she’ll go first and she picks Lucas, daring him to kiss another one of the girls in the group. You groan knowing exactly where this was heading. Tae gets picked and chooses dare, they dare him run into the river naked. You gasp when he instantly rips his shorts and shirt off and runs towards the river. Jimin, Jungkook, and Yoongi laugh so hard they can’t breath. You and Abby look at each other wide eyed when you realize why Tae wasn’t nervous about being naked. He returns from the dare, everyone gives him a  round a applause and he bows after he slides his shorts back on. He looks around the campfire and it takes you off guard when you hear your name roll off of his tongue.

You almost forget you’re playing a game, you nervously look around to see Ben clearly talking about you to one of his friends. Which only pisses you off, “Dare.” You decide confidently.

Devilish doesn’t even begin to describe the mischievous look that paints Tae’s face.

“I dare you…” His eyes flick over to Jungkook, “give Jungkook a lap dance.”

All you hear are gasps and laughter from the people you barely know. You’re heart starts to pound, but the Tequila coursing through your veins is forcing you out of your seat. Tae pulls out his phone and plays F&MU by Kehlani without being asked, almost as if he’s had this planned all along. You take a deep breath and you position yourself in front of Jungkook. He smirks lifting one brow, almost as if challenging you.

You place one leg on either side of his lap, you lean back rolling your hips forwards. He licks his lips looking down at you. The people around you start to cheer you on, hoping to get more from you. You lean forward still grinding into him, kissing his neck and making your way up to the spot just below his ear. You stand up as the chorus starts and you turn around, sitting back down on his lap. You lean back into him as you take his hands, sliding them down your body. You slowly grind to the beat of the song. You giggle as you hear multiple people yell ‘get a room’ jokingly. Jungkook, pulls you into him close placing a kiss to your neck before helping you get off of him and back to your seat. You compose yourself enough to ask Jimin truth or dare, he picks truth, and you bite at your lip as you decide what to ask him.

“Who is the sexiest person here?” You smirk already anticipating his answer.

He bites his lip as he thinks on his answer, laughing to himself when he decides, “After watching you give that lap dance and Tae skinny dip, I think it’s a tie.” He admits with laughter.

Everyone starts to laugh and agree, which instantly made you shy. The game was fun and you’re glad you played. Until one of the girls picks Ben, who of course picks dare. You take a deep breath, and Jungkook’s hand brushes yours. You don’t need to look at him to know that this was his way of comforting you.

She dares Ben to take a body shot off of her. You watch in disgust as he licks up her body in    familiar way, and makes out with her longer than necessary. You want to feel unphased by it.  You wished you didn’t feel anything at all. You’re heart starts to ache as you watch him pull her into his lap when he’s finished. You breathe easy thinking the worst was over, until he chooses another girl to give him a lap dance as a dare.

You instantly turn away watching the girl awkwardly squirm on top of your ex. Suddenly you feel yourself being yanked out of your seat. A large tattooed hand pulling your towards the table of drinks.

“I think you earned that shot.” Jungkook smirks at you as he pours two shots, handing you one and taking one for himself. He taps his shot to yours and you both shoot it back. The game starts to die off and everyone starts to split up into their groups. Some people head to their tents to take care of the built-up sexual tension the game caused. You stay up for about another hour drinking with Tae, Jimin, and Jungkook. Jimin being a drunk and giggly mess, and Tae being way too loud for how late it was.

“Okay boys, I really need to sleep,” you stand up and Tae tries pulling you back down to him, you giggle as you shake him off, “you should go to sleep too!” You yell as you walk towards the tent. You unzip the tent and bed over to slide inside. You sit on Jungkook’s blow up mattress as you slide your shirt over your head, and your pants off your legs. You reach for the shirt on top of your backpack, knowing that it was Jungkooks. You smirk to yourself as you put it on. Maybe you were poking the bear but really you just hated to wear pants when you slept and his shirt was long enough to be a dress. You pull your pillow and your sleeping bag to the mattress as you lay down. Maybe 15 minutes later Jungkook is unzipping the tent to join you. You see that he has two bottles of water and Aspirin. You’re stomach gets that familiar feeling again, realizing that for the second time today, he’s thinking about your needs.

“Sit up.” He demands and you listen, “So obedient.” He rasps, instantly making you press your legs together. You roll your eyes as he hands you two pills and a bottle of water.

“Drink a lot of that, okay?” He points in your direction; you start to chug it giving him a thumbs up. He tilts his head to the side giggling quietly. He crawls to the place beside you on the air mattress. Laying on his side, his arm propping him up with his head resting his hand.

You finish most of the water, and you set it to the side of the mattress knowing you would wake up with a dry mouth. Jungkook watches as you unzip the sleeping bag to make it big enough to cover the both of you. He smiles when he realizes what you’re doing. You lay down on your back, trying not the think about what might happen in the next few minutes. The air mattress bounces lightly as he closes the small gap between you and him. His fingers tug at the hem of his shirt on your body.

“Comfy?” He raises his eyebrows and you instantly blush. You nod your head so delicately, almost begging him not to be mad at you.

“I’m glad, I could definitely get used to seeing you in my clothes.” His voice is quiet and soft and it melts you like butter. His fingers slide up to your jaw and he gently tugs your face so that you’re looking at him. You swallow hard when your eyes meet his lust filled ones. Without even thinking you’re lifting your lips to his. His hand wraps behind your head lacing into your hair as his lips meet yours. The kiss is slow and you can tell he’s teasing you. You bring his bottom lip between your teeth, earning a low growl from him.

He pulls back and he starts to suck and kiss his way down your neck. You can’t help the moans that leave your lips. Each kiss he left felt like a tiny jolt of electricity. His fingers brush the spot on your thigh just below your (his) t-shirt. He slides the t-shirt up until he can see the top of your panties. His tongue runs along his lower lip and his eyes get heavy. You buck your hips up against his hand, you need him to touch you. You feel his chest as he laughs at your impatience.

“So needy,” He looks back at you, with a smirk playing on his lip, “What do you want, baby? Use your words.” He encouraged before kissing your lips softly.

“Please touch me.” He smiles as his hand ducks under the hem of your panties.

His middle finger presses against your clit with a feather light touch, making you want to scream already. He nudges your head with his nose so he can have full access to your neck. His fingers starts to circle softly around your clit before slowly running through your wetness. You know you’re wet, honestly you don’t think you’ve ever been this wet in your life. Jungkook groans as one of his fingers slides inside you.

“So fucking wet for me princess.”

You have to cover your mouth when he switches from one finger to two. His thumb dancing on your clit as he slides in and out of you. You sit up on your elbows watching him, turning every few seconds to bite at his jaw bone.

“Feels so good,” You moan into ear, he adds another finger.

You throw your head back, your back arching off of the mattress as he hits all the right spots. You’re body is hot and it feels like a coil inside of you is about to snap, you don’t stop the moan that falls from your lips.

“Come on pretty girl, cum for me.” He begs and you do, you nearly scream as you come apart on his fingers. He slows down and lets you ride out your high. He brings his fingers to his mouth to clean them, and the sight alone makes you wet all over again. You bite your lip when you realize he’s rock hard beneath his lose basketball shorts. You start to reach out for it but he laces his fingers with yours instead. You look up at him with the saddest face, full pout and scrunched up eyebrows, like someone just told you your dog died. He tries not to but he has to chuckle.

“I want you in my mouth.” You whine.

He laughs as he lays on his back, pulling you to his chest to cuddle. You look up at him with wide eyes.

“Why won’t you let me? You don’t want me to?”

His eyes get big and he takes your cheeks in between his hands, “Of course I want those pretty lips wrapped around my cock,” he coos with a kiss to your nose, “but I want you to be sober before we do anything else.”

You know that you’re not nearly as drunk as he thinks you are, but still it’s refreshing to have a man consider your mental space before his own sexual needs. Again, something you had never experienced.

You lay your head down on his chest, and his fingers work their way through your hair. Gently massaging your scalp. You couldn’t understand why everything he did made your body react in a way that was unknown. Maybe because you had never been with someone where there was actually chemistry. You feel his finger under your chin, as your head is pulled up to look at him. He cups your cheek, lightly brushing your cheekbone with his thumb. If you didn’t know any better, you would think that he loved you. That’s how he looked at you. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the post orgasmic bliss, but that’s what you felt. You swear he feels it too.

He swallows hard before pressing a soft kiss to your lips, “You’re the most beautiful thing, I’ve ever seen in my life.” He whispers with adoring eyes. You instantly look away, feeling the tears starting to form in your eyes. He wipes one away as it falls down your cheek.

“What’s wrong? I shouldn’t have said that?” He questions himself and you shake your head quickly. He was wrong, so wrong.

“No, I just…” you inhale trying to decide how to word what you were feeling, “I don’t think anyone’s ever talked to me like that.”

He nods, and you see anger cross his features for a moment and then leans back, his hand running up and down your spine. You lay your head back on his chest, letting the sound of his heartbeat lure you into a deep sleep. “He’s a piece of shit for not realizing how incredible you are, I hope you know that.” He whispers.

You let out a quiet sigh in agreement, falling asleep a few moments later.

A/n: Please dont forget to let me know your thoughts!! Also let me know if you want to be on the taglist! <3

#bts #bts smut #bts fluff #bts imagine #jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungkook smut #jungkook imagine #jungkook fluff #jeongguk #jeongguk imagine #dive #dive imagine #belovedbangtan #jungkook x y/n #jungkook x reader

[antidotenurse]

If you had the chance to rewrite zexal what would you change abt it and what you you put more focus on?

😳 Okay well… Let’s see. I’m no writer. And admittedly, I’m not as versed in episode citing as much as other people I know. I’m just that person who, after watching something else, will come back to zexal and look at it wondering: “Why is literally nothing happening ever?” So bear in mind my lack of tact and proper vocabulary. 

I’d probably keep it more or less the same… but with a couple shifts here and there. More indulgent stuff on my end is having the Numbers Club y’know, actually DO things. And it’d be nice to have Astral and Yuma have a slight falling out and work build up trust again post-sargasso before he dies.

Most of what my brain jumps to when it comes to “stuff in zexal i’d wanna full on rewrite” revolves almost primarily around Rio and Nasch stuff since I don’t really like it’s execution in the first place. …And Tori. But Tori might likely have to be a separate discussion altogether. So, I guess I’m trying to make a more semi-realistic scenario within certain boundaries? Ex. No adding other episodes, and if something is taken away something new must be added in. And aside from one duel, duels will remain the same. 

FIRST AND FOREMOST: Rio is not killed off for a second time once she wakes up. Her being in a coma fundamentally doesn’t change her role at all as a person giving out “premonitions” whatsoever. It’s actually kind of insane. I’m not gonna go through everything just major moments. A lot and also very little goes on within episodes, I’ll just rely folk can fill in the blanks.

So for some mindfulness, from Abyss onwards, Rio is here.

SHARK VS. ABYSS and then some follow up:

Originally, this set of episodes involved Rio being possessed, and Shark fights Abyss and from there we learn about the Nasch and Merag stuff. Mostly the latter but for some reason focus is on Shark. Rio is then promptly put into a coma again and Shark wangst happens from here on out until the face-heel turn during the Astral World arc.

I’d probably make it start with… Idk. I feel like the original beginning of the episode works fine since it begins with visions being had by Rio. Blah blah, she’s confused, time to find another number. It’s in a weird spot in the middle of the ocean. For whatever reason, this area in the ocean feels really distressing for her. But, regardless, instead of a storm hitting and Rio suddenly going “missing”— as the crew tries deciphering the location, her “powers” take over and cursed by something unknown she jumps from the airship into the sea, followed by Shark who dives in after her (and yuma dives in after shark). Very dumb but the episode must start somehow. And this is likely played more seriously but I can’t help but laugh a bit at the thought.

Shark awakes in an undersea labyrinth, and somehow isn’t dead. Wtf? But hey! He found Rio nearby and she’s okay! The goal is finding the number tho, and her “powers” lead them to it. And uh oh here we go. A guardian is here to keep them from taking it. (As for Yuma, he and Astral’s sideplot about getting lost in the labyrinth is exactly the same, so dw about this)

The duel??? I said I wouldn’t change most, but this is a major exception. I’m making it Shark and Rio VS. Abyss. A two on one duel. We never once saw Rio and Shark play off each other in a duel setting when working together, and I feel like that was a prime missed opportunity. Especially for characters who just episodes prior, had this really weird one v. one duel. This needs something of a resolution. ALSO The memories here do involve both of them, so let both of them go ham.

However, since the memory flashbacks tend to tie into Merag a liiiittle more already (and the more major Nasch stuff will come later), Rio should be the first person to experience the Barian memories out of the two of them. We already got a bit of that with her visions at the start. As the duel progresses, Rio becomes more distressed by what she’s experiencing. During the duel Rio has lots of out of body experiences, on the one hand she’s present in the duel. On the other hand, she slips back into living life as Priestess Merag. But, for some reason, he doesn’t have a lot of control of herself?

But obviously, what Rio remembers is far worse since she pretty much relives her own death and can’t control her “mind.”

Meanwhile, Shark also goes through his vision onslaught, clearly thinking majority of this is some kind of manipulation tactic by Abyss. Episode more or less plays out the same minus damsel stuff. Durbe confronting Yuma and Astral still happens, Abyss being cryptic as hell still occurs and you know. Anyway, they win and get the number, and they all reappear on the deck of the airship knocked out. Everyone wakes up, it feels like a dream but they have the number?? So it couldn’t be?? Rio wakes up last though, which momentarily scares Shark.

TIME FOR REFLECTION!! Rio is fine, but clearly shaken. All those visions she saw… they meant something. Something inside her is telling her that. While Shark too is distraught and stressed by what he experienced during the duel… he doesn’t come to grips at all with it. He’s in more overt denial. In fact, he’s furious. Their lives weren’t lies?! How can she even THINK that? NONE of that was real! Also, wtf why the fuck did she jump into the ocean?! She could’ve died! Shark is emotionally overwhelmed both in potentially losing his sister again, and also the whole barian thing.

Rio isn’t on board either, but she’s always been the more “open” of the two. She’s not down for Shark’s behavior in the slightest, nor his seeming lack of empathy. Y’know? That more abrasive denial thing from Shark that feels a bit more in-line than just moping about a dead sister. Also, she literally relived dying so like. Fuck man that whole lack of empathy thing isn’t cool to her.

P.S Rio isn’t saying they’re Barians, but, maybe it’s her powers of “foresight” getting to her… something about what she saw feels too real to ignore, while the A plot goes on, she’s processing that very real possibility. This starts to cause something of a rift between otherwise close siblings.

Durbe proceeds to use this to his advantage.

[Next episodes: astral dies. Those episodes play out exactly the same except now Rio is part of the peanut gallery. The fearsome four stuff begins]

SHARK AND THOMAS VS. JELLYFISH MAN

Ok we know what happens in the original. Sort of. I’ll be honest? Haven’t seen these eps in a while. But, Shark goes to his old mansion to relive childhood memories, meanwhile coma Rio is poisoned by jelly man, and Shark also gets poisoned too. IV shows up dadada he’s sorry about the Rio thing but he never speaks to her. Things are gettin’ crazy. Something to that effect, I probably went out of order.

I think what I’d do is have Shark and Rio get into a fight about the barian stuff. Or something that really exemplifies the rift between that’s grown between them since Abyss. Either way, it leads to Shark leaving to the one place he feels he can really think — their old childhood home.

(Also Blah blah plot about strings of poisonings fucking people up is going on in the background that Yuma, Trey and Tori are focused on. Why not the numbers club?? Idk you tell me. Real zexal won’t allow that.)

Rio, in the meantime, after reflecting on what was said and done- goes to find Shark. And she knows exactly where he’d go. (Yuma, III, and Tori are present when she does this so they pursue her shortly thereafter. This is to replace the moments in the hospital)

P.S Durbe is watching all of this happen.

Shark reminisces at the mansion, and is promptly attacked by a monster and poisoned. IV shows up how he does originally and yadada duel starts.

Halfway through Rio and co. Find shark and IV dueling jellyfish man. Rio recognizes her bro is hurt, but Shark is not down for Rio or anybody else tagging in for any reason. There’s an interruptive conflict that’s super awkward for everyone involved (so maybe levity from jellyfish or IV can be put here) Yuma and co. show up at the tail end of this brief exchange.

And Rio, still riled up despite attempting to reach out, retreats into the mansion. The duel outside continues, but inside is where she encounters Durbe.

Ideally a moment would be had between Rio and Durbe similarly to a scene in a later episode with Shark and Durbe, but for the most part this will be small and not seen in full. But Durbe holds out Merag’s crest to Rio and he likely says some cryptic anime nonsense about “destiny” or something.

Because she’s been sensing “it” since the Abyss duel, and he firmly believes that she’s known the truth for a lot longer than she wants to admit.

We don’t see Rio again until the duel ends and she’s found inside the mansion. She seems, at “peace” for some reason? Something about her feels… different. Durbe is nowhere to be seen.

Insert moment here where IV and Rio actually, y’know. TALK. But things are kinda too late-ish now… cuz Rio has somebody else to deal with next.

[astral world arc begins]

Aight, while Yuma is off in Astral world dueling Eliphas and saving Astral, Durbe finally puts his final phase into motion to FINALLY convince Shark to accept who he actually is. Something he’s been fighting for a while now. And surprisingly, Rio is helping Durbe, much to Shark’s shock.

Shark at this point had been in his anguish full of regret for being pretty bitchy lately. All the fights, this barian stuff, the confusion, the fact it’s like he doesn’t even KNOW his sister anymore (and this Shark very likely doesn’t), it’s overwhelming as fuck and he’s tired.

Episode plays out normally with Durbe making Shark relive his life during his last encounter with Vector, the Iris thing, the men dying blah blah. That episode is kind of awesome to begin with, so borderline nothing changes here.

The the difference mostly being that the setup is a bit more concrete. Instead of Rio kinda just, being dead and a spirit “guide” to help Shark’s wangst and immediately following his face-heel turn with no insight on how she felt, we’ve been experiencing how she feels for a while and been seeing how it affects her and Shark’s relationship for a while.

It’s eventually mentioned that Durbe showed Rio these memories back at the mansion. Because showing somebody their twins terrible life after you died definitely isn’t horrifying!! Anyway, Rio came to accept the truth… because, like Durbe said before, she’s “always” known.

HOW? Because it turns out Rio’s powers of foresight she’s been experiencing throughout the series were her memories of being Merag trying really really hard to get out this whole time. That’s why she acts differently in those sudden moments. That’s how Rio knows these she couldn’t possibly know.

Rio being present as a “spirit” is there to help guide Shark through this experience, because he’s always been doing things alone for her. Time she returned the favor.

Everything plays out pretty much exactly the same, after all that anguish and reliving trauma where his army dies and Iris dies- Shark FINALLY accepts the truth about himself being Nasch. He and Rio switch sides together (because they weren’t going to do it alone).

Nasch and Merag take their spots in Barian World, and stuff proceeds to play out as normal. Sort of.

None of this is really all that great, but it’s a start? Again, I’m not a writer and a lot of this would realistically be overshadowed by the scheduled duels that play out, the A plot with Yuma, and generally be a lot more condensed due to the limited amount of episodes left. All this to say that there’s more ways than “dead sister” to make something happen. I dunno these are all minor shifts and my vocabulary is hyperbolic. 

#antidote asks #again I'm not a writer #the focus is mostly the same. I just didn't like all the wangst #this series isn’t exactly high art in terms of writing so I wouldn’t call this perfect. #THIS TOOK ME MOST OF LAST NIGHT AND THIS MORNINGFF

[that-0ne-simp]

The night left ( Kuroo Tetsurō x Reader)

Heyyyy! Quick note y/n is a real person in this real world! And I suggest you listen to " idk you yet by Alexander 23" on loop 🔁 for this story :) thank you!

                                                                         6:00pm

You were walking home alone after a bad day from school. This happens a lot that it became your routine. No matter how hard you try for some reason you can never have a normal, positive, happy day. Sometimes you wish you could just disappear or maybe go back to the time you were a kid. Imagine how fun it would be living your life with pure happy imagination

.As a kid, you always had a wild imagination. As you grow older the harder life gets your wonderful imagination slowly fades into a pool of anxiety, self consciousnesses, and sad reality. You used to have this big no I mean HUGE crush on Kuroo Tetsuro. You loved the idea of having him by your side comforting you and loving you. Somehow the thought of that makes you feel less... lonely.

That was in the past. Now you live in an apartment on your own starting your 1st year in college. It is heartbreaking to realize how much you've changed not only physically but also mentally. You realized in the real world no one would do that to you. No one will hug you and tell you everything will be alright, no one will ask you how your day went, NO ONE will ever be there to listen to you.You eventually end up in front of your apartment door. You were about to unlock it when you heard a series of footsteps as if someone was walking around. Cautiously you slowly open the door and that's when you saw someone you never knew alive nor existed.

"Nice to see you Chibi-chan!" He said with a goofy smile on his face. You stood there in pure shock "What the hell?! Is this a joke? Are you a cosplayer? You know what?! I don't care get out. NOW" you said utterly confused. "NO NO NO no I'm not! Please believe me y/n" he pleaded. " what the hell bro your creepy how the fuck do you know my name? Did f/n set me up? Did she hire you? You better get out now or I'm calling the cops!" " NO! y/n I'm Kuroo Tetsuro! You see! come on, please... trust me"

 you knew you shouldn't trust him. You knew you shouldn't believe him but, there's something that's telling you that he's telling the truth. Of course, that is impossible but it was sincere the look in his eyes. What the hell is happening? Have you finally gone crazy from all the bullshit the universe has put you through? Despite this crazy shit happening you managed to stay calm. Honestly, the word has put you through so much shit that you cannot find the care anymore. 

You sighed " so you're Kuroo Tetsuro, as in the captain of Nekoma which happens to be from an anime" "yup" he answered shortly. "That's the dumbest thing I-" you couldn't continue cause deep down you know you believe him. I mean who wouldn't? He has the same voice, hair, height and he looks exactly like Kuroo and not to mention his aura and personality, It's like the exact copy. You look at him as he smirks and raises his eyebrow as if he was telling you 'see? I'm right'.

 You roll your eyes at him"fine if you are Kuroo then what are you doing here and how are you even here?" "Well the second question's complicated but I can answer the first one. I'm here because..." "because?" "I wanted to see you" when he said that you were taken back and slightly flattered at the thought that someone wants to see you. " and why did you want to see me?" You asked hoping to make more sense of the situation. 

You've got to admit you were kinda anxious for his answer but what he said completely confused you."Because I missed you" when he said that you suddenly had the urge to say it back. The truth is you did miss him a lot but you wouldn't admit it. "ok then.." you replied as you take deep breathes in hopes to calm yourself down.You know you might regret this, you know this is dumb as fuck but "so do you want to stay?" The moment you said that his eyes lit up like a child as if he was waiting for this his whole life. He softly replied with a genuine gentle smile on his face. " I would love that love" For some reason him calling you love gave you a nostalgic feeling. It made you feel safe like you could be yourself with him. 

"What's with the new nickname? What happened to chibi-chan?" You asked as you head to the kitchen. It took him a while to respond. "..don't you remember? We used to call each other that" you couldn't see him but you had a feeling that he wore a sad smile on his face as he recalled the memories of you together. For you on the other hand don't remember any of that happening... when it hits you. You remember reading a fanfic book of you and Kuroo being together and throughout the book, you called each other love. At that moment all your doubts vanished. You completely believe him. He is your Kuroo. You were confused but you weren't scared. You take the snacks and walk to him on the couch as you compose yourself.

 "Well then, it's really nice to see you Kuroo" you said with a smile on your face as you sat down next to him. After an hour or less of watching tv with him, he asks you "hey love?" "hmm?" "Can we do face masks?" You were taken back by his sudden request but you're not complaining. "sure...but why tho? I didn't think you're kind of guy who enjoys face masks" you asked as you look up at him. He looks at you mischievously "you told me you wanted to do face masks with me and besides I always wanted to try the peel-off ones" 

The smile he wore can fool others but not you though. You had a feeling that it's not the entire truth."Kuroo, what do you really want?" Short silence took over once again until "I want to spend this night with you doing the things we've wanted to do" now that was the truth. He never wanted anything more than to spend time with you. "Fine" you said slightly laughing at how cute he's being. After a few hours of doing random stuff like curling your hair with straws, doing random dance videos, baking, and dancing.

It was now 12:20 am and both of you decided to go for a walk. "Thank you" he mumbles "hmm?" "I said Thank you" "for what?" You asked " For spending the night with me" he said while smiling but for some reason there it is again the tint of sadness in his tone. You stop walking and look at him with a teasing smile on your face. "huh? You've been acting all weird all night are you sure you're Kuroo? Cause the real Kuroo I know is cocky, sarcastic, and is a science nerd even though he's a complete dick" you teased trying to lighten up the mood.

 "Hey! who are you calling dick chibi-chan! For someone who is so clearly lacking docosahexaenoic acid you sure are great with your words SHRIMP" He says with a smirk. After that, you guys walked for an hour or two as you talk about dumb shit. When you guys get home it was already 2:57 am. Both of you decided to cuddle in bed. " I wish we could stay like this forever" you say with his arms wrapped around you comfortably as you slowly drift off to sleep.

5:00 am

You woke up to Kuroo looking at you lovingly as he creases your cheek while humming a beautiful melody. You listened to him more and you realized It was the song you always imagine him singing to you. "Good morning Kuroo" you greeted with a smile. "Good morning Love" He said as he gently kisses your forehead. "sleep some more love" "but Kuroo I'm not-" " Please y/n" He pleaded, his voice somewhat shaking as he pushed your head to his chest. You didn't notice the tears threatening to slip through his eyes. "Hey, Kuroo?" "hmm?" "all we did tonight was everything I wanted to do. But, What about you?" You asked trying to look up at him to see his face but you couldn't, he was holding you so tight as if he would lose you. "didn't I tell you to sleep already?" He asked as he let out a small chuckle. "Fineee" you said pouting. After a few seconds of silence "good night Kuroo" you said as sleep takes over you.

5:30 am

"Y/N... Love" You woke up to Kuroo saying your name shaking you lightly. "hmmm?" you answer still half asleep and you rub your eye. "good morning love" "good morning, why'd you wake me up?" You asked looking at him eyes half-open. "Guess what chibi-chan" "hmm?" "I love you" That simple three-letter word woke you wide awake as you feel your face heating up. "T-Tetsuro w-" "and I want you to have sweet dreams of me" and that's when you noticed the tears streaming down his face. "h-hey are you o-" You panicked, you don't like seeing him like this nor do you like the feelings his words are giving you. You can't bear the fact that he's talking to you as if he was saying goodbye. Tears threaten to fall from the sudden terrifying thought of him leaving. "I love you so fucking much" He cried once more with hurt visible on his beautiful face. "h-hey! why do I feel like you're saying goodbye!" at this point you were also crying, you weren't ready. You didn't want to risk it, you wouldn't be able to handle it if he were to leave. "I will never get tired, I will never say no for more time with you" The tears kept ongoing and all you could respond with is a little whimper. "Promise me you'll be the cute and happy chibi-chan for me forever. Cause if you do I will be the happiest man alive" "Tetsu- please don't leave me, I wouldn't be able to handle it. Tetsu please, you can't leave me, I love you, you're everything I've ever wanted. All I need is you so please." You cry desperately holding on to him scared to let go. "I'm sorry for not telling you sooner... Tell me, love, how can you miss someone you've never met? .....I Love you so much chibi-chan" He leaned in, lips a few centimeters from yours and before it even touched. It happened all so fast. In just one blink of an eye, he's gone with a beautifully decorated envelope stood in his place.

Dear Y/n,

I'm sorry... I'm sorry I didn't complete the things you wanted to do with me. I couldn't do the last one. I didn't have the courage to say it to you out loud so I'm sorry if this is not what you expected but I do want to say it to you so here it goes. Y/N L/N is your name but you were Y/N Kuroo from where I came from. You might have now noticed that all my memories of us together came from your imagination or from stories you read. The memories might not be true but y/n I love you so much and that's something you cannot deny. I've been with you ever since you knew about me and I didn't have the guts to leave even though you already left me. I can't blame you though I know you're getting older and I know that as times pass by you will eventually forget about me. You asked me what I really wanted. Well, I wanted to start a family with you, I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. But more than anything I wanted to be with you even if it was just for a night. Love, you are the most adorable, beautiful, kind-hearted, caring, lovable girl that I have ever met. I love you so damn much chibi-chan. My chibi-chan, I missed you.-Love Kuroo

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kuroo Tetsuro Bucket list:

Spend a night with her✔

Finish her bucket list ✔

Kiss her

If you cringe while reading this because of all the grammar mistakes sorry bubs but I’m too lazy to fix it ;P

#angst #kuroo #tetsuro #haikyuu #nekoma #kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsuro x reader #tetsuro kuroo x reader #chibi-chan #sad #fanfic #fictiophilia #love for a fictional character #real life y/n

[theouterbankpogues]

after sarah doesn’t invite kiara to her birthday party (a jj x kiara fic)

author : theouterbankpogues aka vi

fandom : jj x kie, jiara | outer banks on netflix

tags : the angst, the fluff, the hurt, the comfort y’know!!

warnings : none

i love writing for this ship bc it has a chokehold on me and i just... i’m so helpless lmao. i read this hc set by @lemon-patches​ (which you should definitely go and read bc it’s amazing and all the feelings) and it talked about how jj and ki were each other’s first kiss and no one else knows. this is basically how i imagine it happened. enjoy!! as always the validation feeds me so yeah if you like it pls share it and stuff (i love reading tags on reblogs so lmao do with that what u will). i imagine they are 15/16, about 6-8 months before s1 idk if that adds up but lol thats what i went with. sorry for any errors u may find xx

a little preview so u know what you’re getting into hehe: “They stood like that for a while, long and quiet breaths synced, arms entangled in waist and shoulders, hearts rhythmically beating, just enjoying the warmth of the best friend they dearly missed.”

Tears streamed down Kiara’s face. She knew that calling the cops was petty, she knew it was the worst of her manifesting itself, but tonight Ki couldn’t bring herself to care. She found herself toppling some books off of her bookshelf. She had always known that she wasn’t good enough for Sarah. The Sarah Cameron. God, she felt so stupid.

Another wave of regret coursed through her. The pit of her stomach hollowed when she re-remembered that she’d actually listened to her parents and decided to give her kook year a genuine try. She had distanced herself from the cut and the pogues, her best friends, the people that she could always count on, the people who always cared. She gave it all up for the superficial bullshit she knew would eventually fall apart.

That entire evening, the anger and regret approached her in harsh and unforgiving turns. She couldn’t escape her own thoughts, she was so mad at herself. She had let herself become vulnerable, given herself up for someone to use and dispose. She felt so weak. All she really wanted to do was fit in, to have a normal year where she wasn’t disappointing her parents, where she wasn’t out at unreasonable hours getting her friends out of messes, watching their string of luck grow thinner and thinner with every prank and practical joke. She was tired of being the middle between the kooks and pogues, she loved the latter and she could’t escape the part of her that was the former. She just wanted to resign to one side, she just wanted things to get easier. Kiara had decided to leave everything for some peace of mind, and now she knew she’d made a mistake. She hadn’t even checked in with John B, his dad was missing and she hadn’t even checked in with him. God, she felt so stupid. Her sobs overtook her as she sat at her bed.

She was so exhausted from the crying she could scream, it had been a few long hours. And Ki, in a moment of clarity, convinced herself that she was too strong for that. Even though she felt horrible, she reminded herself that she was too careful to let this anger get the best of her. Instead, she resorted to taking a few deep breaths and cleaning up the various books and stationary strewn across her bedroom floor as a remnant of her anger. What had happened had happened, she was just going to have to figure out how to cope on her own.

Yeah, I just have to figure it out on my own. I’ll be fine.

That’s when she heard it.

Thud.

Thud. Thud.

Thud.

‘What the-’

She realised that the sound was coming from her window. Stepping toward the side of her room facing the balcony, she realised that pebbles were currently being thrown at her window by a silhouette below it. She couldn’t tell who it was because the backdoor lights had been switched off for the night. It was well past midnight and her parents were soundly sleeping in the next room, she swore she would never forgive the person currently trying to break her window if they woke up. She didn’t want anyone to see her as the mess she was right now. So as quickly and as safely as Kiara could, she opened the balcony window, “What the actual— JJ? JJ is that you?” Kiara couldn’t really understand what was going on, she had stopped talking to the pogues months ago.

“Yeah, hey Ki! Come down!”

“What?”

“You heard me bro, get dressed and come down!”

After a curt nod, she went back into her room, changed out of her PJ’s into some joggers and a hoodie and found herself sneaking out the back door out of genuine curiosity. When she was outside, she realised that neither Pope nor John B were with JJ. Along with that, she realised that he had two boxes of pizza and some beer cans set down on the grass next to him.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“I was scrolling through Instagram, realised you weren’t at the party, thought you might need a pick me up,” He seemed to register her tired face and puffy eyes under the dim starlight because he continued, “guess I was right!”

And that’s how, twenty minutes later, JJ and Ki found themselves in a clearing near her house. They sat down opposite each other, the pizza boxes separating them.

“Got your favourite, double cheese, double pepperoni and half the jalapeño.”

Except for the occasional direction here and there, Ki had been quite their entire walk. She couldn’t really even process what was happening. How was JJ here? Why was he talking to her after she’d treated them him like shit the past few months? None of it made sense to her, least of all why this was all from JJ. With all of it perplexing her, the only thing she managed to say was, “You remembered.”

‘Yeah of course I did Ki, just because you stopped talking to us doesn’t mean we stopped caring about you. Come on, dig in, it’s getting cold.”

She didn’t know how to respond to him so she just followed him in picking up a slice from the box. Warm pizza , cold beer and melted cheese heavily complemented the gentle breeze that surrounded them. They fell into a comfortable silence as they ate.

“I’m so sorry.”

“I know Ki-”

“No, everything I did these past few months, the way I cut you guys off, the way I left y’all when you needed me I-”

“Ki we know-”

“God, I’ve been so stupid, I left you guys, like y’all were nothing, y’all needed me and I-”

“Ki, Ki-” Ki just continued, she felt horrible, “KIARA!” JJ saying her full name was so foreign to her, especially since he hadn’t even call her by her nickname these past few months, it undoubtably got her to stop talking.

“I know the pressure your parents put on you to start at that kook academy. Look we all know how hard it is for you to manage these two parts of your life. I know Ki, you don’t have to keep apologising, I know. We know! Why do you think we didn’t try to talk to you when you told us last summer? We want you to do what’s best for you Ki, you are better than us.” At that, Kiara got up and paced back and forth a few steps, remorse hitting her unbearably. 

“I’m not better than any of you. A part of me wanted to leave you all behind.”

JJ’s response was almost instantaneous, “I don’t blame you for it!”

“Well you should! I left you and Pope. I left John B for god’s sake. His dad is most probably dead and I wasn’t theRE.... I-I’m not there.”

At this point the tears had returned to her and she broke on her last word. Her voice wasn’t steady anymore. “I left all of you... I left you.”

JJ couldn’t stand hearing Ki like this, there’s nothing he hated more than having to let down his guard and get real. But JJ, when she said that, realised that this wasn’t about him. 

“Yeah Ki you did, but fuck that. We know you love us, we know that it was a difficult call! You have to forgive yourself. The reason I came tonight was to let you know that you have the people that care about you Ki.”

He stepped toward her and looked her right in the eye, Ki had never seen someone so determined with compassion before, “Whatever you do Ki - if you wanna go to the kook academy, if you wanna be friends with Sarah Cameron, if you wanna cry about how horribly she treated you, if you wanna listen to your parents and not talk to us, if you wanna leave the cut- we’re never not going to have your back. You’re a pogue. You’re our pogue! And if Sarah Cameron can’t see how kickass you are, she doesn’t deserve you and she never did. You got us Ki, we’re always right here. No matter what.”

And throughout all of that, he hadn’t stopped looking directly at her. She was enamoured to say the least, she couldn’t remember the last time JJ talked about something that real, let alone carry an entire conversation himself. Knowing her words wouldn’t suffice, she hugged him. She smelt the sea salt in his hair and pizza grease on his shirt and it was the epitome of comfort to her. JJ hugged her right back, it meant the world to him that he could make her feel at least a bit better. They stood like that for a while, long and quiet breaths synced, arms entangled in waist and shoulders, hearts rhythmically beating, just enjoying the warmth of the best friend they dearly missed. 

Before they could completely untangle from the other, Ki looked back at JJ, god, how did she get so lucky to have someone like him in her life? The air lightened around them as she looked at him, his eyes regained the mischievous glint they always had. It might’ve been because she was slightly tipsy, or because he was staring so intently at her, but for some reason, it felt right. There was no waiting or thinking, she rested her hands on either side of JJ’s face and kissed him. His lips were chapped and they tasted like beer but she loved it. A rush of adrenaline ran through her, it was new and exciting. 

When JJ processed her soft lips on his, and her hands caressing his face, he pulled back. Along with confusion and surprise, there was something in his eyes that Ki couldn’t recognise. But before she decided on asking him what it was about, he was already kissing her again. 

And this time there seemed to be nothing holding him back. His hands were wrapped around her waist, she was grabbing fistfuls of his hair in reciprocation. They knew that they would never be able to do it again so they just gave in. His hands travelled to the small of her back and her neck and she swore that she had never felt something more intoxicating. 

Ki had forgotten where they even were when they broke for air. They were both just breathing, eyes closed and foreheads touching, it was the closest thing to perfect the either of them had ever felt.

When they opened their eyes and looked back at one and other, they were surprised at how comfortable it felt. How... un-awkward, it oddly felt right. But they knew what the rules were, they knew that when Ki got home, they would never talk about it again, and they were fine with that too.

As they approached her doorstep, JJ couldn’t help himself but ask, “Was that your first-” “Yeah.” “Yeah, mine too.” “What?” Kie thought he was joking, JJ had flirted with every other tourist at the boneyard since they were like ten, “Mine, too.” He repeated. There was an honesty to his response that stopped Ki from asking any further. 

She hugged him again. “Thank you for this. I missed you.” He hugged her right back.

“I missed you too. When you come back to us, more beer will be waiting for you no questions asked, don’t ever doubt it.” With that, he placed a soft kiss on her forehead and left. 

Ki had a small smile playing on her lips; she had never felt lighter in her life. 

#im actually proud of this #it came out so cute #jiara #jj x ki #ki x jj #kiara x jj #jj x kiara #obx #yes there are timeline inconsistencies #im sorry #outer banks #netflix obx #netflix outer banks #obx ff #obx hc #outer banks hc #outer banks fanfiction #outer banks ff #jiara hc #jiara ff #jiara fanfiction #user:theouterbankpogues

[onthevirgeofdestruction]

So I've been reading your fics for a while and it recently occurred to me, how would the painful death crew handle the events of break? Would it pan out the same way or do you think it would go down slightly different?

How would the PD Crew handle Break? As in one of them is Break!Virgil or as in being around when shit goes down? 

I’ve got Ram (PD!Remus but make it a fictive) here with me so... 

Ram: 1,Dante is a chill bro, and I stan them. We have the same music tastes and Dante is kind of amazing, anyway. I would die for polterdante/j 2, I would have ab-fucking-ducted Break!Virgil and/or PD!Virgil from that situation if I was around it if I didn’t fucking snap and try to kill Zillah for doing it. Like how does anyone not have the biggest fucking mental breakdown of their lives when they find that shit out? Rem says ‘same’. 

The thing about Vesper(PD!Virgil) is that if he was in Dante’s(Break!Virgil) situation, he might also put up with it until he found a safe way out. I mean I’ve met Zillah and the dude is kind of sneaky. He’s really nice with the kids and acts really normal other than murdering Dante on main on a fucking regular basis, giving me weird second-hand trauma? Dae says he regrets not going more into how Zillah acts in public vs. private? “At the beginning of the story they were at point of their relationship Zillah was isolating Virgil, so there wasn’t much opportunity to do so, but it would have enhanced the dismal atmosphere and shown more ways abusers isolate their victims.” 

Anyway, Ves in particular would have run off, eventually. He’s not great at finding red flags but he believes takes his friend’s word for it and would be more likely to listen to Logan when he notices things weren’t right. He’d run off without asking for help and just meet up his friends later like “my name’s jared i’m 19 and i’m now fucking homeless”. Rem would have thrown a bitch fit and started a fight. He would have gotten out of it bruised but got out nonetheless. He only tolerates that shit from his dad because minors don’t have many rights (Also just Rem’s ex-dad’s job). I think I’d be the most at-risk in that situation because stress obviously fucks up my mental state and I won’t make great judgment calls. Dante only hallucinates in the sensory dep thing. I, on the other hand, hallucinate all the fucking time and trust me that it’s really easy to let the delusions suck you up if you don’t have someone who can ground you. The delusions might of left me stuck in that situation for life. Oof. Vesper could have gotten me out, though, but I’m not allowed to go into why. Damien would have called the police on Zillah or fucking leave before he got in too deep. He’s just smart and capable like that. Dorjan (Break!Janus) was only in it for a few months before he fucked right out of that abusive relationship. I don’t think Damien would let a single thing pass, he’s got a serious amount of self-respect. Also, D’s parents are very nice. Part of Dante’s shit is his upbringing with his parents giving them a bad impression of how people should treat each other. And that’s not spoilers, it touches on it in the video call chapter.

My brother is a fucking flake but it is 5 in the morning so maybe he gets a free pass for not answering on his half of the cast. Something-something crying, I guess. Roan(Ro) might also be kind of at-risk since he really needs people to like him on a kind of dangerous level sometimes. I think Kal(Pat) and Liam(Logan) wouldn’t tolerate being in that situation as long as Dante did. Kal’s parents are actually decent and he knows red flags, and Liam is basically always looking for red flags. Paranoid little dude sometimes. They’re pretty ride-or-die for each other so they’d probably fight to get each other free, too. 

I agree with Break!Logan in that the only proper response to that situation is to get a spiked baseball bat and go ham. Though the security system on that house is extra and the narrative game for break kind of goes through why most of those options are a bad fucking plan. Poor Dante’s got it bad, even now. 

If we were backing up Dante we’d be rolling up with fucking swords and sweet, sweet dragon magic to take Zillah’s ass down. And Maybe also take Dante down to check them into residential. Imagine that conversation, though, right? “Hey dude we’re from another universe and this guy’s been abused and tortured for two years, please assist” and then we just fuck off back to our own dimension. Wild. Dae says he refuses to write crossovers, so my answers are technically “noncanon”, but I have a pretty good fucking idea, okay? Okay. He’s letting me answer because I’m answering “as an alter”, blah blah blah. IDK like I know Ruy and Ras aren’t old enough to read Break but I’d be interested in an adult Dreaming!Roman in that situation? I mean he’s tolerated some shit but those little fucks are creative and will likely do something completely over the top to get roman out because you know Ras would be like “are you serious with me get the hell out of there”. Maybe they’d somehow get the fucking plea vampires up in there??? You know Tempest and D aren’t letting Zillah get out of that alive. 

I’ve read Break and like what the fuck Dae but honestly we been knew that he’s a sick son of a bitch so that’s not news. Rebuild is wild as shit, too, have fun with that, guys. Daeram says it’s “difficult to edit because of the nuance of Dante’s situation”, but there’s a lot of chapters already.

Anyway, rephrase the question if I didn’t answer it right and maybe I can try again. Or whoever, I’m just the PD fuck that fronts the most lately because I’m supporting my bro Steve’s gay shenanigans.

Vesper wants everyone to know he will ascend to a new dimension when the Among Us update comes out and wants to play it with everyone ever. Also if anyone is willing to play the Arsonist mod with us until then, we’d love that. Hit us up on the server.

Ayri again and oh rain two ADHDers confronted and ascended to a place where time doesn’t matter but now the sun is going to fucking rise. I put in the fictive’s sources because Ram always calls them by their new names and pronouns. hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh just adding that yes Daeram doesn’t believe in doing crossovers for our AU’s but the fictives interact from time to time and they certainly don’t mind answering questions about that stuff. Dae’ll stop them if spoilers. Fictives don’t front super often but like most of my asks sit in the box for months anyway because tumblr keeps not alerting me they exist. I’ll get to the other asks I found tomorrow if I remember. I think Ram kind of went overboard but he stands by what he said so whatever have fun with it? 

#painful death #break #asks #anon #abuse tw #Anonymous

[hanupboy]

Falling for you

Pairing: Jisung x Reader

Genre: fluffy fluff, it’s really sappy lmao

Words: 3.6k

First date AU

A/N: can anyone tell how whipped i am for this boy? skjadkas god, writing for him was SO hard, i actually wanna die dsjkas but,,, anyways,, enjoy my sap i guess uwu

          »»————-　 ★☆★ 　————-��«

Falling for Han Jisung was the best thing that ever happened to you. Stealing glances at him whenever he passed you in the hallways made your heart flutter. Seeing him in one of your shared classes improved every single one of your days. Occasionally being teamed up on a project made you question how one person could possibly be this lucky. Even just thinking about him made you feel so many things, you didn’t believe you could be any happier. That was until one of his friends, Hwang Hyunjin, who dated one of your close friends, told you to meet him after school.

But of course it wasn’t Hyunjin who wanted to see you. In front of you a nervous Jisung was standing, with red cheeks and a heart beating as fast as your own. Seeing him fiddle with his fingers made you visibly swoon, observing him for a bit, trying to calm your heart before you talked to him.

Pressing your back to the wall to hide your presence, you caught his shaky voice speaking words of encouragement to himself. “Come on, Han Jisung! You can do this. You’re great, you’re handsome. You totally got this, bro. You’re not nervous at all.” He blew some of his hot breath on his freezing hands, creating a white cloud doing so, before stuffing them in the pockets of his oversized hoodie. He looked around like a lost puppy, scanning the area for a sign of you. “Wait, did she stand me up? Why would you do this to me, Y/N?” he whined, dragging your name out cutely.

“Do what to you?” you giggled, finally walking up to him. Jisung looked like a deer caught in headlights, “Y/N, hey! Nothing, I was just- wait. How long have you been here already? Did you hear.. anything?” “Hear anything? No, of course not.” you saw him visibly relax upon hearing this. “Except for you being great, and handsome, and totally not nervous at all.” you added, making Jisung cringe in front of you. “Oh god. Oh my god, this is so embarrassing, I-” he crouched down on the floor, putting his hands in front of his face, hiding from you. “It wasn’t supposed to go like this! I wanted to be cool and smooth when I do it!”

“Do what, Jisung?” you tilted your head at him, putting on a confused face. “Stop teasing me! You know what I’m talking about!” “No? I have no idea, like at all.” you looked at him expectantly, urging him to say what he wanted to say. After a lot more complaining, Jisung finally got up and prepared to go through with his actual plan.  “Alright, Y/N. Even though this didn’t go the way I wanted it to and I don’t look cool at all anymore, I still want to-” “Yes!” you squealed out immediately. “Y/N! You said you didn’t know! Why would you torture me like this if you knew all along?” he started whining again, making you giggle. “Because it’s fun! And you’re really cute when you’re like this, you know?” His cheeks turned a deeper shade of red immediately. “Ah, stop! Don’t call me cute! I already regret this.” he pouted. “Aw, so no date? Bummer.” “Don’t even think about it, missy. Tomorrow. I’ll pick you up at 6! See ya!” he said, running off with a big grin on his face.

         »»————-　 ★☆★ 　————-««

Y/N [5:38 PM]: come on!! tell me where we’re going (◕‸ ◕✿) Jisungie ♡ [5:39 PM]: nono, it’s a surprise (〃 ω 〃) Y/N [5:39 PM]: please!! what am i supposed to wear if idk where we’re going? give me a hint  ‘ ᵔ ‘

You plopped back onto your couch, frustrated with Jisung’s secrecy. You stared at the outfits you put out to possibly wear, playing every possible scenario in your head. Would you be overdressed in a pretty dress? But a shirt and pants might be too casual. Should you just wear a skirt? After a few minutes your phone rings again.

Jisungie ♡ [5:45 PM]: something comfy! i’ll be there in 10  (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄

A big smile spread on your face, rushing to your closet.

         »»————-　 ★☆★ 　————-««

You already went to the front door, checking your appearance one last time in the big mirror, organizing some strands of hair when you heard steps in front of your door. The noise outside caught your attention, so you decided to take a look through the peephole. Once again you were met with a nervous Jisung, trying to fix himself before knocking on your door. “Hey baby~ did you wai- god no, this is awful.” he cleared his throat. “Hey, Y/N. Wow, you look great today! I mean, you always look great, not just today. I didn’t mean to imply you’re ugly on other days or something like that. What am I even saying?” he took a shaky breath. “Alright, here goes.” he said, raising his hand to knock on your door, only to be met with you opening the door before he could do so. You looked at him with a sly smile on your face, realization hitting him pretty fast. “I embarrassed myself again, didn’t I? I need to stop doing this, really.” he sighed, a shy little smile on his lips. “Don’t worry, I like that about you. So, are you gonna tell me where we’re going now? Or are you gonna leave me in the dark, still?” you took his hand and marched off. Wow, he thought to himself. You really were something else. He would never get used to the way you eased his mind after making a fool out of himself while at the same time making his heart race. “Wait, our ride is right there!” he reminded himself, rushing around the corner, making you chase after him. “Our.. ride? Jisung, what the hell.” you laughed, seeing him sit on his bike proudly, waving you over. “Milady, would you like to take your seat on this fine vehicle of mine?” he patted the spot behind him. Giggling, you walked over to him, sitting behind him and stuffing your hands in his pockets. “You’re an idiot, you know that?” you said, making him smile. “You said you like it, remember?” he gave you one of his earbuds, putting the other one into his ear. “Adventure time, let’s go!”

         »»————-　 ★☆★ 　————-«« While driving to the destination, which was still unknown to you, Jisung was singing along to every song on the playlist he created especially for this occasion. Sappy love songs, one cuter than the other. “You can be my It-Girl, you’re my biggest hit, girl~” “You have a really pretty singing voice, I like it.” you said, making him stutter. “Where did that come from? Haha, sing along with me!” “God no, let’s not destroy the song.” you chuckled. “Come on, please? It’s more fun if we both sing. There’s nobody here, no one will hear you. Just sing.” he said before continuing his singing. He put one of his hands inside his pocket, holding yours in it and giving it a firm squeeze to encourage you. You don’t know why, but being with Jisung really did give you courage. Maybe because he seemed to be so talented and confident in everything. Or maybe because you felt so happy being with him, that you didn’t have time to actually worry about something. But his touch felt like flying, he gave your heart wings and before you knew, you closed your eyes and sang along to his voice. It felt whole, beautiful, just perfect. It felt like the world was just spinning for the two of you in this exact moment, just so you could hug Han Jisung, hold his hand, sing with him. You made a silent wish to the stars that this moment, these feelings, would never pass. And so did Jisung.

         »»————-　 ★☆★ 　————-««

“Madame, we have arrived.” Jisung says, stopping the music. “Oh god, Jisung. Are you serious?” you looked at the big amusement park in front of you, a shiver going through your body just thinking about all the roller coasters he was probably going to drag you into. “What’s wrong? You don’t like it? It’s gonna be fun, I promise!” he said cheerfully, taking your hand. “No, that’s not it. I’m just terrified of roller coasters. Like, actually terrified, oh god.” you stated, clinging onto his hand. “Don’t worry Y/N, there’s nothing to be scared of. I’m here with you.” “Oh, so you’re going to protect me, big boy?” you smiled, actually calming down a bit by what he said. “Count on it, I totally will.” he said, dragging you into the roller coaster.

A few minutes later, when the ride came to a stop again, you found yourself being crushed by a shaking Jisung, holding onto you for dear life. “Oh god, i-is it over? This was horrible, absolutely frightening, what WAS that?” he rambled on, not even attempting to get up. “Jisung, calm down. It’s over, you big baby. Also, I can’t breathe.” you giggled, finding him absolutely endearing. And even though Jisung did a terrible job at actually protecting you, his not-so-manly screams throughout the whole ride made you laugh too much to actually be scared of it. After one of the employees peeled Jisung off of you and out of the seat he was glued to, the two of you went for some drinks to calm him down. “Woah, let’s never, EVER, do that again, okay? Roller coasters suck.” he said, taking a sip of his americano. “I told you they’re terrifying! You should’ve listened to me, idiot.” “Yes, yes. You were right. Happy?” he said, giggling. “God, all the screaming made me hungry. Want to get some snacks over there?” he asked, tugging on your hand. You didn’t even realize you were holding hands this entire time, and the warmth of his touch went right to your cheeks. “Sure, let’s go.” you said, avoiding his gaze. And Jisung loved it. He found it absolutely adorable, the way you suddenly got so shy about something you’ve been doing for the whole duration of the date. While completely getting lost in his thoughts, just admiring your beauty, a bubble popped on his nose, emitting a surprised “Oh?” from him. As the both of you look up, you find yourself in a beautiful storm of bubbles, swirling and dancing around you. You excitedly let go of Jisung’s hand and chased the bubbles flying around, dancing with them, trying to pop them and laughing like a little child. Watching you, Jisung wondered how he got this lucky. You were the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, his chest got warm and fuzzy and the only thing he felt in this moment was pure happiness. “Come on, Jisung! They said we can make bubbles, too!” you said, dragging him along with you.

         »»————-　 ★☆★ 　————-««

“God, I’m exhausted. That was so much fun!” you said, sitting down on the bench with a bottle of water. Jisung plopped down beside you, taking the bottle from you and taking a big sip himself. “It really was. The people were so nice, too.” he said out of breath, looking at you. “What do you want to do next?” “Get those snacks,” you said, “I’m starving.” “Cotton candy?” he asked, raising a brow at you. “Yes!” you said cheerfully, jumping up and down.

“One big cotton candy, please.” Jisung said to the woman in the little shop, giving you a soft smile. “Of course, what color would you two like?” the woman asked, looking fondly at the two of you. “Pink!” the both of you said at the same time, followed by amused laughter. “One big, pink cotton candy! Coming right up. Your girlfriend is really cute, young man. Treat her well.” she winked at Jisung. “Oh I’m no-” “I know, right! She’s the cutest girl ever, right? Thank you!” he took the snack from the woman, giving her a big tip before taking your hand again and running off with you. “What was that about, Jisung?” you laughed, looking at him curiously. “What do you mean?” he asked, taking a big bite out of the huge, sugary cloud. “Why didn’t you tell her I’m not your girlfriend. We’re still on a date.” you giggled, surprised that he’s pulling your own trick on you. “Well, my dear Y/N, isn’t that obvious?” he pointed the cotton candy at you. “It’s because I’m planning on changing that fact as fast as possible.” he said, confidently, making a big grin appear on your face. “Oh, really? I’m looking forward to it.” you said, biting into the snack that was still held in your face.

         »»————-　 ★☆★ 　————-««

As the date went on, people started to leave the amusement park. The sun was long gone, revealing a lot of pretty stars above the two of you. Jisung and you just walked around the park, talking about your interests, friends, childhood stories. Time was flying as the two of you couldn’t stop laughing. “Wait, you two actually were about to fight? Like, an actual fight?” “Yes, I swear! God, I hated Hyunjin’s guts. We really didn’t get along at all to the point we would just make an arrangement to tolerate eachother and pretend to be on good terms around our friends.” he explained to you. “So how did you end up being that close then?” you asked, making Jisung break into a soft smile. “I don’t know. I guess somewhere along the way we noticed we weren’t actually that different. We share a lot of interests, we’re both really passionate about music, for example! I didn’t even know that about him before. He’s really important to me now.” “That’s beautiful. You’re interested in music? Do you do more than just singing with that beautiful voice of yours?” you nudged him with your elbow, reminding him of the little serenading he did for you on your way here. He started giggling, thinking of the cheesy songs he sang to you. “Yes. I like rapping a lot. I also produce my own music with my friends, but.. it’s nothing special, really.” “I would love to hear it sometime.” you said earnestly, making him look at you with sparkly eyes. “Really? You mean it?” he asked you, looking really excited. “I do. I want to know about everything that excites you. Also, I could listen to you singing for hours, so it’s a win-win.” you giggled. As you walked on, you saw a vending machine with lots of plushies inside. Jisung dragged you towards it, making you screech from the sudden pull. “Let me win you a plushie!” he said excitedly, making you laugh. “Jisung, this is such a waste of money. It’s really hard to win one, we’re just gonna throw in a lot of money and get frustrated.” you tried to reason, but Jisung didn’t listen at all. “Please, come on. It’s a date, I HAVE to win you something. What kind of date would it be if I didn’t. Which one do you want?” he asked. “You watch too many rom-coms, Jisung. It’s perfectly okay not to win something for your date!” “Which one~” he dragged the last word out cutely, stomping his feet, trying to convince you. “Fine, fine. This one.” you pointed to a squishy little plushie on the left, kind of resembling a squirrel. “I’m on it! I’m gonna win this, just watch.” he said, focusing on the money eating machine in front of him. 10 minutes and 24 bucks later, he groaned out frustratedly. “Is this plushie stuck? Why isn’t it coming out. Come on, I’m gonna get you.” he said, trying to intimidate the soft little animal trapped inside the machine. “Jisung! Stop, you’re going to be completely broke if you continue like this.” you tried to reason again, making Jisung whine. “One last try, please? We can do it together, come here.” he pulled you by your hand. You rolled your eyes at his stubbornness but agreed, hoping that he would stop after this try. You put your hand on the little stick that controls the machine and Jisung covered it with yours, feeling how cold your fingers were already. He really tried for a long time for you to be that cold, huh? “On the count of three, okay?” he looked at you with apologetic eyes. “One, two, three!” You pressed the button to make the machine stop and grab something together. You suddenly got really excited, closing your eyes because you didn’t want to see if you failed again or not. A few seconds later you felt Jisungs hand leave yours, making you pout. “Milady, we did it.” he said, squishing the soft plushie to your cheeks, making you jump in excitement. “Yay! We did it, Jisung! We got it!” you shouted, happiness radiating from your face, lighting up Jisungs world. “The power of our love, am I right?” he said, smiling at you, making both of you laugh. “Okay, no, this was horrible. Sorry. Want to go home?” he asked. You nodded to that, trying to take his hand again. “Oh, wait.” he said, to which you replied with a puzzled look on your face. All of a sudden he took off his hoodie, throwing it in your face. “You really have to work through every cliché, huh? What’s this for? You’re going to be cold, Jisung.” you laughed. “N-no. I’m not cold, I’m a man.” he said, shaking. You raised your brow at him, looking amused. “Oh really? You’re not cold at all?” “Just wear it. Y/N! Please! I’m trying to be a gentleman here.” he whined. “Fine, I’ll wear it. Dork.” After you put it on, Jisung took your hand again, leading you to the exit. “Let me escort you home, miss.” he said, pointing to his bike. “Why thank you, good sir.” you replied, waiting for him to get on and claim your place behind him, holding your plushie in one hand and snaking the other one around his torso.

         »»————-　 ★☆★ 　————-««

You never dreaded coming home as much as you did today. “We’re there, Y/N.” Jisung said, getting off the bike with you. You both looked at eachother with a pout on your faces, not wanting to end the day yet. “So.. did you have fun today? I know, it didn’t really go the way I planned it, but-” “I loved it.” you interrupted him, looking at him with sparkly eyes. “Really? I’m glad.” he responded, a soft smile playing on his lips. “So, did my plan work out?” he asked, looking at you directly. “Plan? What plan?” you asked, confusion evident on your face. “Are you teasing me again?” he whined, squirming in front of you, making you laugh. “I’d love to say yes, but no. What plan are you talking about?” you said, looking at him expectantly. “The plan of making you my girlfriend, dummy.” he smiled at you shyly, warmth rising to his cheeks. “Oh. That plan.” you replied, mirroring the blush on his face. “I don’t know, you didn’t really ask me yet.” you said, looking into his eyes. He took a step closer to you, looking back into yours. “So, Y/N, would you like to be my girlfriend, please?” he asked, holding his breath while waiting for your answer. He looked beautiful like this. The moonlight hitting one side of his face, his eyes shining, you being the only thing they see. You took one more step towards him and pressed your lips onto his, both of you closing your eyes. Time seemed to stop and the coldness of the night subsided. His lips were soft and it felt like they were made just for you to kiss them. He tasted of coffee, cotton candy and pure happiness. After breaking the kiss both of you tried to catch your breath, laughing awkwardly. “Can I take that as a yes?” he smiled at you. “Yes. I’d love to be your girlfriend, Jisung.” As Jisung let go of your hand and tried to leave, you stopped him. “Wait, your hoodie, let me give it back.” “No, keep it.” he said. “What? You’re going to catch a cold, you still need to drive home.” you explained, but Jisung, again, didn’t listen. “It’s a gift for my new girlfriend.” he stated, wiggling his eyebrows at you, making you laugh. “You already gave me this though.” you said, raising the little plushie you won earlier. “Two gifts are better than one! Oh, by the way. Why did you choose that plushie? There were a lot of cuter ones in there.” he asked. “Because it looks like you, see?” you pinched the little toy squirrels cheeks, “Should I call you Sungie? Yes, that’s a cute name. This is Sungie~” you cooed at the soft plushie in your hands. “Hey! That doesn’t look like me at all!” he pouted, puffing out his cheeks, resembling the plushie even more now. You started giggling at how cute he was. “Fine, call it Sungie then. I’ll get going now.” he said, giving you a quick peck on your cheek. “Text me when you’re home!” you shouted after him. “I will, don’t miss me too much, Y/N!” he shouted back, getting onto his bike. “I won’t, I have Sungie with me~” you teased, making him pout again. “Hey! Don’t love that thing more than you love me, okay? See you on Monday!” he said before driving off. You looked after him for a few more seconds, pressing your new plushie to your chest. As if loving someone else was even possible.

#han jisung #han jisung fluff #han jisung scenario #han jisung au #han jisung fanfic #stray kids #stray kids fluff #stray kids scenario #stray kids au #stray kids fanfic #han jisung imagine #stray kids imagine #han #jisung #if u see this: hi alyssa uwu #this is my sap #ksks

[hcneymilkks]

NCT Jeno ‘Next Door’

requested by the lovely @jaeminsoftgf ! thanks for requesting Summer and I hope it lives to your expectations! 

Request your own oneshot here!

prompt numbers:

2. SWEATER PAWS AND CUDDLES. “if you don’t grab me a blanket I’m breaking up with you.” “I’m watching Barbie Nutcracker.”

16. Neighbour au in which one gets drunk on mulled wine and ends up knocking at the other’s door, drunkenly trying to seduce the other and - instead - passing out in their living room

Pairing: Jeno x Reader

Genre: Fluff/slight crack 

Word count: 1.5k 

MASTERLIST

So,,,,,, you come home earlier than expected for the holidays and notice that the neighbours beside you have moved out

They lived beside you ever since you were a kid and you were sad because they were an elderly couple who were so sweet

So ofc you get sad and all

BUT

The new neighbour comes rolling in and WTF

He's handsome.....like hella handsome

Meet Jeno. Second-year University student studying medicine

He comes popping to your door to introduce himself and that's when you knew

Uh oh

Fuck no,,,, heart pls skip the love at first sight ahhhhhh

So naturally, you would do what any ordinary person would do, you introduce yourself back and ask if he wants to come in to hang or something

But yet, you're not ordinary and instead slam the door in his face and run up the stairs

"Y/F/N I swear he's hella hot....and I just did a dumb thing."

Mr. Jeno on the other hand,,,, just couldn't get you off of his mind

Like he thought when you get into University, crushes are non-existent

NOPE

Moving into this new neighbourhood made him realize something, he wanted to be friends with you.

 ....maybe even more.

 A few days into break and you're helping your parents decorate.

All I want for Christmas is blasting in your room and you couldn't help but belt out to the song and bust out your "best" dance moves

When I put it in quotation marks I mean like just fist-pumping many times into the air and doing the dab or something

You don't even notice but Jeno is just staring at you like "wtf are you doing woman?" but at the same time, he's enjoying it because he's never seen you like this before

Like come on you barely leave the house anyways

And like once the song finishes you look at your window and SEE THAT THE CURTAINS WERE DRAWN AND YOU REALIZE THAT JENO SAW THE WHOLE THING AND HE STARTED TO CLAP AND LAUGH (even though you couldn't hear it)

You scream and try to close the curtains but Jeno puts up a piece of paper

"you were AMAZING."

You tilt your head and then reach to grab some papers and markers and craft a response of your own

"BRO I AM SO SORRY YOU HAD TO SEE THAT JSJSJSS"

More scribbling, more showing paper.

"LMAO IT'S FINE I GENUINELY ENJOYED IT."

Then you realize that you both are like recreating that one Taylor Swift music video by writing messages and showing each other INSTEAD OF JUST OPENING THE DAMN WINDOW AND TALKING

But its okay because you both get closer for some reason

Even though your hand hurts

And as you scribble down another response, Jeno beats you to it.

"WANNA COME TO THE NIGHT MARKET WITH ME?"

That my friends is how you went on a "date" to the night market

^^ I say date like that because you both don't know it's a date....but it kinda is

Food everywhere, some snow falling, a huge Christmas tree in the center

You both manage to do some Christmas shopping and regret not bringing a bigger bag.

"Jeno help I'm dying."

"okay um....wait,,,, what's your name?"

Smooth Jeno smooth.

But like how else was he supposed to get your name?

"it's Y/N. Now help me."

By the end of the night, your stomachs were filled, and your minds were filled with more ideas of what to do together.

NOT TO MENTION SOME PICTURES THAT YOU SECRETLY TOOK OF HIM

AND LIKE DAMNNNNN HIS SIDE PROFILE SEXY

You both finally got each other's numbers

Contact names:

 Jennifer/Jen NOOOOO LMAO IMAGINE JENNIFER IM CRYING

Y/N/The LOML/DabDab Y/N

Getting closer to Christmas and you both have late night convos and send each other memes

It's like WOOJIN God had sent you a sign like "bitch hello this is the boy for you now take him."

Conversations would be like:

Jen NOOOOOO: Y/N, Y/N, FOR FRICK SAKES Y/N

You: OI YOU ASPARAGUS WHAT DO YOU WANT I'M TRYNA SLEEP

Jen NOOOOOO: WHO U CALLING AN ASPARAGUS?! THAT VEGETABLE IS A STICK AND DO I LOOK LIKE A MF STICK!?!

You: UM......

Jen NOOOOOO: ANYWAYS wanna make snow angles?

Jen NOOOOOO: Angles*

Jen NOOOOOO: Angles*

Jen NOOOOOO: A N G L E S*

Jen NOOOOOO: OHMYGOD ANGLES*

Jen NOOOOOO: SJSJSJSJ NVM

Now we getting to the good tea oof

So it's December 23rd, two days before Christmas

You decide to stay at home cuddled up in a blanket having a movie marathon

And then the doorbell rings and there's knocking

You pause the movie, keep the blanket on like a cape and then open the door

The cold air hits your face before you could see who was there

·It's none other than Jeno

"Um hi?"

"Y/N! MY LOVE! THE LOVE OF MY LIFE! HOW I MISSED YOU!" he funnily walks in and spins around in your living room.

At first,,,, you don't understand...like why is Jeno at your house at 11 pm at night?

Then your phone dings like 10 times

Jen NOOOOOO: IS THIS A Y/N?

You: UM WHO ARE YOU AND WHY DO YOU HAVE JENO'S PHONE?!

Jen NOOOOOO: I'M ONE OF HIS FRIENDS YOU DUMB DUMB AND IM HERE TO WARN YOU THAT JENO JUST LEFT HIS HOUSE TO COME TO YOURS....I THINK HE WANTS TO TRY AND KISS YOU OR CONFESS TO YOU IDK

You: WHO TF U CALLIN DUMB DUMB AND WHY DID YOU LET HIM OUT OF THE HOUSE?

Jen NOOOOO: let's just say he got too drunk and elbowed Haechan in the face while he was restraining him

You couldn't even finish answering when Jeno back hugged you, his breath tingling the back of your neck

You stiffened at the sudden contact and you felt butterflies in your stomach

Oh no

OH NO

"Y/N....let's cuddleeeeee"

Jeno drags you to the couch and awkwardly tries to cuddle you which resulted in him giving up and just standing back up.

"Y/N look at meeeee."

Dammit he's a pouty baby.

He squishes his cheeks and tries to wink and does so many things at once like damn boy calm down.

"Y/N,,, are you a Christmas light? Because you light up my world.

"Y/N,,,, you're the gingerbread to my house."

Jeno stumbles walking closer to you "Hey Y/N,,,, you're sexy, come-" and instead passes out on the couch awkwardly.

You didn't know what to do. But Jeno's snoring made you snap out of your daze and took a photo.

You: WHOEVER HAS JENO'S PHONE PICK HIM UP LMAO HE DIED

Jen NOOOOO: HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA......nah

You: WTF

So that's how for the rest of the night you got stuck with a passed out Jeno and cringing at what he kept saying.

There's no way he was into you? Right?

HELL NAH YOU ARE SO WRONG

December 24th, the next day.

Jeno groans and somehow has the hugest hangover.....and realizes he's not in his house.

He turns his head way too fast to see you coming to him with water, some pills and breakfast.

It's like five seconds and the food is already gone...like sir slow down

Jeno feels much better and it's an awkward silence

"um...I'm gonna head out-" "Um...why did you come here yesterday so out of the blue?"

Cue Jeno blushing and stuttering and trying to figure out what to say.

"I uh.....well my friends and I were playing truth or dare and if we didn't want to answer the question we had to drink some wine. Let's just say I didn't answer any questions and I guess my um...heart led me here?"

Awkward silence.

"Oh...wow um I'm flattered? I mean I just didn't expect it....but I also didn't mind it you know?"

So that's how you both just indirectly confessed to each other.

You two didn't waste time putting the labels of boyfriend and girlfriend. Him grabbing a few clothes from next door because he said he didn't wanna be alone on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

"And what better way than to spend it with my lovely girlfriend?"

"Lee Jeno if you don't get me a blanket from upstairs I'm breaking up with you."

So what did he do? HE BROUGHT A BLANKET FROM HIS HOUSE LMAOOOO

Also some of his hoodies because of your late-night call confessions.

You: "I want a boyfriend."

Jeno: "excuse me am I not enough for you?"

You: "Jeno." *laughing* "you know what I mean...like I want a real boyfriend. One that I can cuddle all day with and fully call mine...NOT TO MENTION THE FREE CLOTHES LIKE HELL YEAH I WANT THEM FREE HOODIES FROM THE BOY."

When Jeno throws the hoodie and blanket at you, you're confused because you never owned this type of blanket...UNTIL YOU REALIZED THAT THIS IS HIS BLANKET THAT HE SLEEPS WITH.

Yeah you both literally, just call, text and facetime even though you are just one door away from each other.

But who has time to walk LMAo

Okay we getting off track so like back to the present day

So you put on Jeno's hoodie and damn does it smell good.

He notices that you have sweater paws and he just goes all soft and wants cuddles.

"Oh yeah, what are you watching?" he asks as you press the play button.

"I'm watching Barbie Nutcracker."

 For the rest of Christmas Eve you both cuddle under the blanket while watching Christmas themed movies.

And damn you think this might be the best Christmas ever.

#NCT #lee jeno #christmas prompts request #complete! #haechan #jaemin #nct dream #oneshot

[ficsandcatsandficsandcats]

hey bro, i know you’re busy so whenever you have the timeeee, the melancholy is setting in again & i was wondering if you might bless me with some valdo cheering up aev when she thinks she’s not good enough? 💛

Fandom: The Witcher Pairing: Punk!Valdo x Punk!Aevryn Word Count: 1,688 Rating: G Taglist: @heroics-and-heartbreak​ @whatevermonkey​ @mycat-is-mylove @mynamesoundslikesherlock​ @kemmastan​ @magic-multicolored-miracle​ @writingstudent​ @mlleecrivaine​ @coffee-and-stories​ @amirahiddleston​ @ultracolorfulnerdcollection​ @astouract​ @your-not-invisible-to-me @daydreamer-in-training @morelikebyesexual a/n: Ah bro, I know that feel. Here is an almost 2k word hug xo

If there was one thing that Jaskier and Valdo could put aside their differences for, it was Aevryn. They’d done it as youths when she performed and they did it now as they worked to keep her from checking the hits her newly released demo were receiving. It went well for most of the day. Valdo woke up ludicrously early just to make sure he’d be there to pounce – somewhat literally – when she woke. After that lengthy distraction he pulled her into the shower with him before she could check her phone. Right on cue as they were just toweling off, Jaskier showed up at the door. He and Aevryn had a pact that if ever one of them showed up on the other’s doorstep and invoked Friend Code, the other had to drop everything and spend the day with them. Valdo made a big show of being dramatically grumpy about Jaskier arriving, such a big show that at some point Jaskier wasn’t sure how much was for Aevryn’s benefit and how much was just amusing himself, but he managed to get her out the door. Aevryn noticed her phone wasn’t on her as soon as they got in the car and Jaskier texted Valdo quickly to let him know that their first plan hadn’t worked as she went inside to find it. Valdo quickly tucked the phone in his jacket pocket, loathe to hide her property but desperate to keep her from seeing the numbers.

“It hasn’t just disappeared, Valdo, I swear I had it on the nightstand when we fell asleep last night,” she said, grasping under the bed though she knew Valdo paid their housekeepers handsomely enough that every inch stayed dust bunny free.

“We were pretty well knackered by the end of things, love, there’s a fair chance it got left behind in a restaurant or something or other,” Valdo lied lamely, frantically texting Jaskier for ideas to stall. Aevryn’s head popped up over the side of the bed, a swath of wavy hair falling into her face. She looked like a very adorable, very grumpy groundhog popping out of its hole but Valdo was just wise enough not to make that observation at that moment.

“Valdo I’m not going without my phone. What if something happened and you needed to reach me?” she asked.

“I’d call Jaskier,” he answered quickly. She cocked an eyebrow at him suspiciously.

“You’d call Jaskier?” she replied skeptically.

“If it were a real emergency, yes. I’m talking lost limbs and extensive blood loss. But I’ll endeavor to be safe in your absence,” he crooned as he tried to pull her to the door. She was almost over the threshold, Jaskier walking towards the door to escort her the rest of the way, when her phone went off in his jacket. There was no mistaking that it was her phone because the song that rang out was a punk cover of Barbie Girl, an inside joke between her, Yennefer, Win, and Y/N developed during a girl’s night. Her sea green eyes filled with hurt and suspicion as she stared Valdo down, reaching into his pocket to pull it out and finding a missed call from Win. A voicemail was left a second later and she opened it.

“Babe don’t even sweat it,” Win’s voice, filled with disdain said, “We know that it’s a solid album and the right people will catch on soon too. I know you hate taking favors from Valdo’s people but it’s only nepotism if you’re not qualified. I say call those bitches up and say Hello, This is Aevryn Swift and I’m here to kick ass and play beautiful music and I’m all out of ass. Or something like that. Idk, we’ll work out the details, call me when you can, bye!”

Valdo exhaled heavily, making eye contact with Jaskier who still stood a few steps away, both watching as Aevryn silently went to the bandcamp page to look at the download numbers. She stared at them for a moment, unblinking, and then nodded.

“Ok,” she said with eerie calm before turning to Jaskier, “This was just a ploy, right? You don’t actually need to invoke Friend Code?”

“Ah – well – Er… no,” Jaskier answered sheepishly. She nodded again and pushed past Valdo to walk into the house. The two men exchanged a last, regretful look and then Jaskier turned back to his car and Valdo re-entered the house, prepared for a raging fight.

Aevryn put the kettle on and picked up the little pile of mail on the kitchen island and Valdo walked in cautiously, waiting for… something. She glanced up, a cool but serene look on her face.

“Did you want some tea?” she asked.

“No thank you, dear heart, but I do want to talk about the likelihood of you trying to murder me in my sleep tonight,” he replied. She rolled her eyes, turning to pull a mug down from the cupboard. Not even one of her usual, fun mugs, just a standard green one that she teased Valdo for using because it was so “boring.” These were all very bad signs but also new ones and he wasn’t sure what they meant. After knowing Aevryn for half of his life he wasn’t used to this feeling, and he didn’t like it.

“I’m not going to kill you. You were trying to keep me from checking, right?” she asked, peering over her shoulder. He nodded, curls bouncing slightly as he did, and she nodded back.

“I get it. I mean, it wasn’t cool, but I probably would have done the same thing,” she said as she fixed her cup.

“It is bullshit, Aev. Win’s right, we have connections-”

“No, Valdo. Anyone can get an album released, hell I already did it. But money can’t make people like or care about something if they don’t. Even if I was willing to consider it – which I’m not – it wouldn’t make a difference. I wanted to give it a shot, I did, now I know,” she said, shrugging her shoulders as she poured an amount of sugar that Valdo would have been disgusted by before but barely registered at the moment.

“Aevryn if I didn’t know any better I’d say it sounded like you were planning to stop performing. But there’s no way that could be true because that would be utterly bizarre and impossible because music is a part of who you are and you have a rare talent that should be shared with the world. Right? Aev?”

Valdo moved a bit closer as he spoke, eyes softening with worry and Aevryn deftly slipped by him with her mug, unable to look him in the eyes as she replied.

“Don’t be dramatic, Valdo, you’re just biased. And it’s fine. Jaskier will be thrilled to have me work full time as social media manager again and it’s not like I still can’t play music,” she shrugged, settling into her favorite chair in the living room. Valdo propped his hands on his hips and fixed her with a stern but not unloving expression.

“Aevryn Deirdre Swift-Marx you are not going to give up playing music because some people on the internet didn’t pay attention to your music as quickly or as much as they should have. There is no shame in pushing back and doing what you love because you love it and fuck the rest,” he argued.

“There’s also no shame in deciding not to invest more time and effort in something just for it to be ignored,” she shot back, a flicker of anger in her eyes. Good, he thought, better anger than apathy.

“You did work hard. You wrote beautiful music, you practiced and performed, you edited and you put so much into this album. And it deserves to be recognized and appreciated,” he said, a vehemence in his voice that could only be described as “ferocious validation.”

“I did,” she replied, “I worked very hard and I think the music is good, why don’t they notice? Why don’t they care?”

Valdo caught the glossiness in her eyes before she could look away and nearly pitched her mug of tea over the chair onto the hardwood floors as he tried to pull her into a hug. He held her, awkwardly half-standing/half-crouching, not caring that his arm was falling asleep or anything but the fact that she held him back with her free arm, resting her head against his shoulder.

“I know it’s hard, love. But I have a proposition for you,” he said. She pulled back to look into his emerald eyes as he moved into a full crouch by her side, fixing her with an entreating look.

“What?” she asked.

“Today, be sad. Be angry. Be whatever you need to be. Take a break, perhaps. Process through it. But then forget it. Or let it fuel you. The only thing I ask is that you not let other people stop you from doing what you love. And even though it was hard work, I know you loved every part of it. And that deserves recognition and respect but most of all it deserves to exist. Because it makes you happy.”

She considered his words, pulling her hand inside the sleeve of her too-large sweater to wipe her face before tilting her head back and sighing.

“Ok,” she said, “I won’t quit the music industry forever. Not today, at least.”

“That’s all I ask,” Valdo said, rising to press a gentle kiss against her cheek, “Now how about I make you some fresh tea, because that’s gone cold, and you burrow under that blanket and pick something ridiculous for us to watch.”

“French Kiss is not ridiculous, it is classic and underappreciated,” you argued hotly. He smiled, pleased to see his spitfire back as he pulled the mug from your hands and thrust the quilted blanket into your lap.

“Whatever you say, sweetling,” he replied, and then set off to make her more tea, carefully selecting a mug shaped like an otter and searching for some biscuits before she could think to ask.

#joz-stankovich #bro #Punk!Valdo x Punk!Aevryn #Punk!AU #Valdo fluff #Valdo imagines

[twilightvolt]

And so, another year has come to pass.....almost. ^  ^

Remember when i said i was branching away from Digimon back when i drew up Venom fanart? y’know, “I wanted to be more than what i used to be.” that being “a Digimon artist.”

2019 was basically just that. lots and lots and LOTS of fandom hopping.

If last year was me recovering from the pain and crippling anxiety of 2017, then this year was me finally getting up again, learning to stand up and live for myself rather than in fear of those i shouldn’t care about anymore. life still hasn’t been too kind to me even though, compared to last year, we’re in a better space. but i’ll get into more detail about that while i go through everything month by month on the clock.

Before we begin, if you’d like to see the previous years, here’s the links!

2018:https://twilightvolt.tumblr.com/post/181732950569/i-kinda-was-saving-this-for-when-i-had-the-time-to

2017:https://twilightvolt.tumblr.com/post/171806337539/a-3-month-late-art-summary-featuring-art-that-i

Might wanna grab your popcorn, my dudes. this is a long one.

January: On the Web

Coming out of 2018, things were pretty ok if i remember. i don’t remember much from this month aside from a few doodles i did like this one from when Spiderverse was the hottest thing. this was one of the last things i drew in my old style. before i decided to officially change things up in the next month.

February: Gotta Kick it Up

Pokemon Sword & Shield were announced and things were hype! oh, how things soured as the months went by. lol

But yeah, this was me taking that experimental sketchy pencil style from that Smash Bros. drawing and rolling with it all the way! it’s become my new go-to style and even though it’s still hella sketchy at times, i feel like it looks better in comparison to my old ink outlined drawings.

March: The Overdrive Dweebanoids

Oh right. my old Ben 10 phase that lasted for a millisecond in 2016 returned with a vengeance. and it was glorious. lmao

It spawned an AU that i didn’t delve into much, but if i ever get that spark for my favorite alien watch bearer, i’ll get back to it.

April: True Blue Lizard Bois

My Ben 10 streak continues and i was crankin’ out art left and right for it. i luved all the “doodle dumps” i made, but this drawing was wholesome and i picked it because of that.

To some extent, this could be a comparison between my past and my present. that being Overdrive!Ben being what, at the time, was my current obsession while Digimon!Vivi was a representation of where i used to be, back when i was starting out and entering Digimon OCTs on Deviantart.

May: Return to the Realm of Sleep ~HD ReMIX

Now THIS i feel was one of the grandest drawings i’ve done this year. hell, i even made a wallpaper out of it.

like, it was just a redraw of an old drawing from 2017. but to me, it was a way to tell me just how far i’ve come since then. and i couldn’t be happier.

This was also the month i rebooted my DA after a long time of inactivity!

....Iiiit didn’t really work much, but i’m still working on it. though i highly doubt it’s worth it considering most of the ones i used to hang with there are either people i don’t wanna associate with or people who left while i was gone. seriously, it’s a ghost town there.

June: Art Fight 2019 ~Dreams Vs. Nightmares~

Ahh, my second year of Art Fight. for this year’s event, i wanted to be a tad more grandiose. like drawing up this banner. i like being extra and stuff even if it kills my drawing hand, so yeah. lmao

...

Florida thunderstorms are friggin’ terrifying. idk HOW anyone can get used to that.

July: - BREAK DOWN -

Oookay, it was hard picking my favorite attack this year cuz i pretty much was satisfied with all of them. but i had to go with this attack because the artist i drew it for was someone i really admired for years and i’m just happy i could finally have an opportunity to draw them something. like, i luv how it came out, so yeah.

This was also the month i forced myself to finally do the thing and let go of the constant fear i felt towards certain people i used to hang with. while remembering 2017 will never NOT hurt, i can’t let that fear rule over me forever. i have to take control and not let it stop me from doing what i want. and that’s exactly what i did.

August: Ricky ~Sapphire, Emerald and AlphaSapphire

Oh yeah! after Art Fight ended, i returned to Pokemon randomly cuz i wanted to go back to my roots for a moment. revamping Ricky, formerly Ragna, and Yagami was something i’ve been meaning to do for awhile and it reignited a waning love for a series i started growing distant towards since Gen VII.

I used to really like Ricky’s old design even though i barely ever used him. but i guess this just shows how much more original i’ve gotten in terms of character design. ^  ^

September: Heartbeat Inferno

Now, i haven’t really talked much about what’s been going on life wise for most of this post, but trust me when i say irl, things weren’t really.....happening. like, it’s hard when you live (or rather, lived now) in a place with little job opportunity and you have NO experience whatsoever. the lack of progression must’ve hit something in me, so the week i drew this was me just....shifting moods, feeling everything at once. one day i’d be agitated as hell, the next i’d be so depressed i took a some odd hour nap and didn’t wanna get out of bed. like, for most of this year, i haven’t felt this stressed out and frustrated with myself. so this sudden crash was kind of....unwelcome.

But this drawing was a fresh change though, if i’m being honest. i’m not usually this uncaring about how clean the coloring job is, but i like it! i’d choose that other drawing i did for my friends’ birthdays, Skirmish at the Cable Club, but this one had a more personal drive behind it.

October: - PAPERMOON -

beastarsbeastarsbeASTARSBEASTARS--*COUGH COUGH AHEM* I MEAN....hai. :D

Continuing with my Pokemon shenanigans, i drew this big piece which was something i had in my head for years now, but never actually acted upon it cuz i always felt it was too big of an idea to work on. i’m happy i’ve managed to capture what i envisioned originally.

As for interests, i’m sure most of my current followers can deduce that i quickly shifted gears to Beastars as soon as the anime was released and so far, i regret nothing. it’s spawned a metric butt ton of new art from me and the way i see it, this phase ain’t stopping as long as this series continues. brace yourselves fam, i believe i’ve finally found the successor to my Digimon phase. lmao

Like, damn, i had a tough time choosing art for this month. i was stuck between this, - SMILE/WILD SIDE - and Slip Into Madness. so many good drawings i was satisfied with, y’know?

November: The Future is Now

I was SO planning on putting something else here, but then suddenly i just kinda had this urge to redraw that uggo gouache painting of Miyagi from highschool. and it turned out so good that i had to. like, really. lmao

As with the redraw of Dream Drop Digital’s key art, it was a reminder of how far i’ve come since then art wise. and i feel like i’ve accomplished so much this year because of it. ;w;

December: Winter Lights

And now we’re back to the present time. after over a year or so of living in Florida, we’ve moved once again back up north a bit. yet another clean slate, but things seem to be looking up despite the rather large bumps in the road the past week or so. lately i’ve been feeling that seasonal depression starting to set in, but i think i’ll be fine as long as i stay positive. cuz y’know, it’s not being happy all the time. it’s just knowing that things will get better someday.

One of the other reasons i drew this drawing was cuz i REALLY wanted to have something Beastars related on this clock. this series (and Legoshi in particular) really inspired me, so i had to leave a wedge open for my boi.

Looking back at the beginning of this decade (as 2020 would mark the next one), i realized that the 2010′s were basically me becoming more artsy. finding enjoyment for a new hobby that quickly became something i’m now more passionate about than video games which i didn’t think would EVER be the case.

Funny enough, it all started in the RP section of a little forum for an MMO called Wizard101. i was only in middle school at the time and, to tell you the truth, i had no idea i’d be going at it for this long. thought i’d just do it on the side but not really delve into the art world more.

But despite all the trips and falls, fandom drama or otherwise, i wouldn’t change anything if it meant i wouldn’t have the friends who’ve stuck by me in the aftermath of those times.

I may not be really succeeding in much, but it’s the small steps in life that matter most in the end. these past few months in particular was me getting fed up with feeling sorry for myself for not doing the things i was interested in in the past, getting over my regret and making plans for starting something new even though i know i’ll suck at first and not worrying so much about how others might perceive me.

And just like how life was changing for our resident grey wolf this first season, mine seems to be doing the same. and i believe this decade ended on a better note than i thought it would during the past couple years leading up to this.

Here’s to a new decade! ^  ^

~ For a future I want to believe in. ~

#art meme #summary of art #2019 summary of art #year end reflections #2010's reflections #rambles

[lostincalum]

Dawn- Ashton Irwin

AN: okay, who is ready for pure fucking angst, with a fluffy ending? idk 

Word count: Bro, almost 3000 

TW: some swearing, some mentions of abuse (not really in depth tho) 

previous parts: Midnight 

i

If Midnight was when you saw Ashton for who he was, dawn would be when he saw you for who you were.

It was after Ashton had stayed over for the first time. It was a weekend, so he didn’t have to get up all that early. Yet, Ashton groaned as the alarm on your phone went off. The two of you barely fit on the dorm bed and after the a long night of being too hot and cramped up, Ashton still pulled you closer.

“Why the fuck is there an alarm set for now?”

He groaned into your collarbone, trying to stop you from moving away, when you pulled the covers off from you and tucked them in under his ribcage.

“Cause I’m gonna go for a run, Ash. I’ll be back soon.”

You whispered as you pulled off the black sweater of his you had borrowed to sleep in. Neither of you were hungover, but Ashton seemed drunk on sleep, as he lifted his head up. Curls were dangling in his eyes, and sticking up in all directions, making him more dishelved than when you had gone to sleep.

“Didn’t we burn enough calories last night?”

He was always a little cheeky, but right now everything felt just slightly out of place. Even Ashton, the man you had been dating for some time now, felt a bit odd in your room. As if he noticed that something was wrong when no clever retort escaped you, he sat up in the bed. Scrunching his eyebrows together in confusion.

“Hey, you alright?”

All the feelings you had bottled up, ever since you had met Ashton were somehow begging to be let out, you could feel your fingers not knowing where to be as you quickly got dressed.

“Angel, talk to me?”

It came out as a question though, like he didn’t want to break you. Like all other questions, you avoided it.

“Look, I’m gonna go for a run, if you want to you can stay here.”

You were standing in front of the mirror, tying your hair up your hair, when he suddenly stood behind you. Not really touching you, just being near you. Before he had a chance to do something, you hurried out the door.

-------

The lighting when you came out, was dull. Nothing had been touched by the sun yet, and everything was quiet, except for a few birds. It felt like your heart was not getting all the blood it needed. It felt like the air around you was dense. It felt like nothing in the world was right. It felt like yet another panic attack.

So you found it best to stop, and go through the easier things, like your name, and number. Then where you came from, and where you live now. Then Ashton, the picture of him in your bed became too much. Tears pressed on as you sat down on the little wooden jetty near the ocean. Little gasps for air sounded as 6:30 rolled around, and another body sat down beside yours.

“Hey, lay back for me?”

It was Calum, Ashton’s best friend. You had met him a handful of times, but under different circumstances. Mostly joyful ones. This was not what you wanted.

“I’m sorry, I’m gonna hea-”

Calum interrupted quickly, looking at you with worries in his eyes.

“Just trust me, it will help with breathing.”

You went out on a limb and decided to trust him. Carefully laying down as sobs racked your body almost soundlessly.

Then he got up, stood with one leg on either side of your thighs and lifted your hips. Suddenly air rushed to your lungs, flowing down like silk. After a couple of minutes like that, he carefully set your hips down, and returned to his previous seat.

“How’d you know to do that?”

The question tumbled out from your lips as overlooked the sea. it had changed from the faded grey shade, to a more lively pink hue that covered the reflection in the water.

“I have taken so many footballs to the stomach, that’s usually the quickest way to gain back breath.”

Calum always had this easy going, yet still thoughtful nature about him. It made him easy to talk to.

“You know my ex? Max? he was very kind in the beginning, but I don’t know, everything just went so wrong, I don’t even know where to begin”

It felt good to get it off your chest for the first time, yet you still regretted that it hadn’t been to Ashton.

“D’you want my advice?”

All it took from you was a slight nod, with curious eyes, that met his deep brown ones.

“Write it down, figure out how you want to articulate it, and bring it Ash, let him read it, let him understand. The worst thing he knows is not understanding, the worst thing for you guys is not sharing stuff like this.”

It made you think, because it made sense, you were just so scared of how Ashton would take it.

ii

Max had always been around as you grew up, not in the sense that you used to be best friends, but that he was always in your peripheral vision. Until the end of high school closed in. He had started with charming his way in, with playing on all the good sides he had, all the little things he had noticed while being in your peripheral vision. After the two of you broke up, he was angry, frustrated, and perhaps a little vengeful.

So when Ashton came knocking on your door after a night out with his friends, you expected him to be fired up and ready to go out on an adventure. He wasn’t. You opened the door to a beaten and battered Ashton.

You stared at him with wide eyes and numb arms, as the door closed behind him.

“What the hell Ash? what’s happened?”

He groans as he sits down on your bed

“Some random guy came up and just started hitting me!”

Now this should have been red flag number one, but you were to caught up in trying to clean up his wounds. He was truly battered, with bruises on his ribcage, a split lip and brow. How anyone might have gotten the best of Ashton you didn’t know. And that might have been red flag number two.

“Please tell me you got some hits in too?”

You whispered as he hissed, when you dabbed the rubbing alcohol on his lip.

“Of course I did, but I can’t say I won though.”

Ashton looked down on the floor.

“Hey, you can’t win every fight you know?”

The words seemed to do little to console him, so you left a quick peck on his lip as you finished with the rubbing alcohol. Then you moved on to clean his eyebrow, where the blood had crusted. You finished up without getting the liquid in Ashton’s eye, and sat down on his lap.

“I just don’t get what he would do that for?”

Grabbing his head with both your hands, you made him look at you. The light from the sunrise hitting his hair making it look like a halo of sorts.

“You have done nothing to deserve random guys beating you up. Ok? Nothing”

It wasn’t an argument, it was reassurance, and Ashton seemed to register it. Because his hands snaked around your hips and interlaced at the back, pulling you close to him. He then leaned back, falling down on your mattress with you on top.

“Oooww, okay, that was a bad idea.”

Ashton groaned out as you looked at him with worries eyes.

“I’m fine babe, I swear. Now come on, it’s dawn and I don’t think you’ve been sleeping again.”

This time it was his eyes that held an immense worry in the beautiful hazel irises.

“Okay.”

It was the only thing you could think of to say as the both of you settled into the all to small dorm bed.

----

Later that sunday you were sitting at your usual cafe, where you studied. When the chair across from you scraped over the floor, you looked up from your notes.

A blonde guy, with too familiar, green eyes was sitting across from you. Max. Your entire face turned into a scowl as you stared at him. Waiting for him to speak up.

“Aren’t you gonna ask me why I’m here?”

He asked, voice smooth as honey, slower than syrup and utterly sickening.

“I know why you’re here. You’re here to study, to make new friends and save the unsaveable, or perhaps you’re just bitter and want to fuck up my life as it is now.”

The anger in your voice was obvious, as you tried to stare him down. He was not budging though.

“C’mon, I’ve changed, I’m not the man you left anymore.”

As if to empathise what he said, he leaned forwards trying to grab your hand.

“I didn’t leave a man, I left a manipulative douche of a boy.”

You said as you pulled your hand from his clammy grip.

“That’s not fair, baby, you weren’t exactly grown up either.”

Quietly you started to pack up all your stuff, being careful so he didn’t notice. It wasn’t  that hard either, considering Max never was good at paying attention.

“No I wasn’t, but I did have a moral compass, even if you clouded it sometimes.”

Just as you were about to stand up, the door dinged as another person walked into the cafe. You looked up, in fear of it being somebody who would tell Ashton. Turnes out you didn’t have to be afraid of that. The person that entered was Ashton himself.

“Y/N, what are you doing with him?”

Ashton looked like the epitome of confusion and perhaps a bit jealousy.

“Nothing, I was just leaving, do you wanna come?”

At this Max also got up, giving Ashton a smug smile, trying to put an arm around your shoulder. Quickly you took a step forwards, as his hand fell to his side. Ashton seemed to notice the fear that radiated in your body language, and reached out a hand, that you gratefully clinged on to.

“Let’s go Y/N.”

To be honest you thought, that could have gone so much worse. Until you noticed Max following you, making you tighten your grip on Ashtons hand. He looked down on you in worry, before turning around and looking at Max.

“Dude, just leave us alone.”

Ashton said as he stopped dead in his tracks.

“No, the slut needs to know where she belongs.”

Without hesitation, you let go of Ashtons right hand, as it pulled back to gain momentum, before smacking straight into Max’s face. A gross sound of bones crunching sounded through the street, as Ashton stepped away, and blood started rushing from Max’s broken nose.

“That was for me, and my girl!”

At that point you didn’t need any more flags. Because everything suddenly clicked. Max had actually, well at least tried to, beat up Ashton.

“Don’t ever fucking dare, come near us ever again, or so help me God, Max, you will be reported to the police for all the stuff you did to me. Your dad isn’t in this state to save you.”

With that you grabbed Ashtons hand, and stormed away from the scene. Shying away from the crowd of people that started to from. As soon as you reached your dorm, Ash stopped you, with furrowed brows and worried eyes, only increasing it when he saw the state you were in. Tears streamed down your face, and he though you weren’t breathing.

“Hey, what’s going on? you need to breathe angel.”

Suddenly it felt like everything was out of place again, just slightly. He wasn’t supposed to see you like this, you were supposed to be the strong, independent girl he first met. Not crying because of some blast from the past.

“I’m so sorry Ash, you need to go.”

It hurt to say it, at it hurt even more when you saw his face, so disappointed and scared.

“Please just go”

Was all that you managed to choke out. And when he left, he slammed the door in frustration, which caused you to jump in fright.

iii

After leaving your dorm, Ashton went back to his apartment, that he rented with his three best friends.

“Thank god you’re back, I really need my coffee right now”

Calum came from around the corner, the two other boys following closely behind him, having heard the door slam. They don’t expect to see Ashton as much in disarray as he is. His hair stood up in every direction, and his eyes never stopped searching the place. As if looking for something. It caused them to stop. All of them saw the lack of coffee, but none of them knew how to ask.

“What’s going on, bro?”

The words come from Calum and finally Ashton meets his eyes.

“I don- she asked me to leave?”

Ashton spoke as if he couldn’t believe what had happened. And finally, the tears fell from his eyes. First a single one and the more.

“I- I think she might have had a panic attack. And she asked me to leave, I just don’t get it.”

-------

That night he didn’t sleep. All he did was sit in the kitchen trying to put everything together, to figure out what he had done wrong. Maybe he had been too much when he figured out that the Max dude knew Y/N, or maybe you didn’t like him being violent, but nothing made sense.

Ashton is still awake at 5:46 when someone knocks at the door. He does not think of the time, or the fact that any normal person would use the bell. So he opens the door, and finds his angel standing there, in one of his old hoodies and ripped skinny jeans.

“Hi”

Your voice was shy, and barely above a whisper. You even had your glasses on, and Ashton couldn’t stop himself. His face melted  into a smile, and he reached out a hand and pulled you into the apartment. He really wanted to hug you, but stopped himself, unsure of where the two of you stood.

“Hey, Angel”

The way she fiddled with her hands, he could tell something was on her mind. Quickly he decided he should let her tell him when she’s ready.

“You want some tea? I think we still have some from the last time you were here.”

All she did was nod, and look around the place. Ashton took the lead into the kitchen, and started making some tea.

“I was gonna give you this letter, but I think it’s better if we talk.”

He turned to look at your nervous expression, and could tell by the wrinkle in between your  brows that you really didn’t want to.

“Okay, cause I have some questions I would like to ask, but, you can talk to me too, you know that right? relationships are a two way street.”

He said before letting her continue.

“Yeah, I’m starting to realise.”

Ashton handed you the now finished cup of tea, and lead the way to the sofa.

“Who was that guy?”

You can feel the bitter smile on your lips, along with a cold laugh.

“My ex. My dickhead ex.”

Now it’s Ashtons turn to feel a bitter feeling growing in his chest.

“He was this really self- entitled asshole, and his dad was a cop in my old hometown, I really thought I was through with him, but it doesn’t seem like that.”

Carefully took the tea cup from your hand, and put it on the coffee table, before he laced his fingers with yours.

“He started out really sweet, but when we got further into the relationship, he wanted me to cut contact with all of my friends, especially the guys. But I didn’t, so he hit me, and it was only once, it isn’t a big deal. But when I went to the police station, his dad was there, He just shook his head at me, even though he saw the bruise on my eye. So I broke up with Max and moved here.”

You didn’t notice the tears that streamed down your face, but once Ashton brushed them away, it all felt okay, a little less bad and misplaced.

“Hey, you know, a lot of things could have happened, but the fact that you got away, the fact that you are here,is so much more important than your past. And I’ll help you no matter what happens.”

At that point you didn’t want to hold back anymore, you were tired and grateful.

“Sleep with me?”

A content expression covered his face, as he lay down and pulled you down in front of him on the couch. Then he pulled a blanket over the both of you, before whispering quietly.

“I love you.”

You grabbed the back of his hand, lacing his fingers with yours and whispered back.

“Love you too, so much.”

-----

The next morning Calum is the first to wake up. He spent some time on his phone, before getting out of bed, and walking into the living room. The sight that met him was not what he was expecting. Cause on the sofa lay Ashton and Y/N spooning, and looking very soft.

#ashton irwin #ashton fluff #ashton angst #ashton imagine #ashton 5sos #ashton #5sos #5seconds of summer #5sos fluff #5sos fic #ashton fic #5sos angst #5sos imagine

[blaperile]

Homestuck Epilogues - Meat - Page 19 (Epilogue 4 Page 2)

#Homestuck #The Homestuck Epilogues #Meat #Epilogue Four #Jade #Roxy #Calliope #Dirk

[originaljediinjeans]

MCU Rewatch: “Avengers: Infinity War” (2018)

Ebony Maw is, like, the worst. He’s just such a sycophant to Thanos, and a real sucker for the ideology, a flatterer. Believe me his death was very satisfying.

I just hate how Thanos pretends to sympathize with his victims. Thanos is an a++ creeper

Thor is just suffering this entire film and it hurts to watch

Loki’s death: I think Loki knew he didn’t stand a chance with his butterknife. there had better be a good reason that this is how it went down because

“You consider failure experience? I consider experience experience.” This is totally Loki BSing but this is actually kind of a good perspective to have about life’s little misfortunes.

Are the stones connected to Thanos himself? Through the gauntlet? Does that connection grow? 

Considering that Vision was feeling the Mind Stone acting up in his forehead I think the Infinity Stones are connected and the Gauntlet only amplifies the connection. 

The only good explanation for the Soul Stone giving itself to Thanos is that the Infinity Stones are Sentient and Evil. It’s a stretch to justify Thanos somehow sincerely having love for a daughter he spent years abusing. IMO it’s plausible, but it’s a stretch

If any of the Asgardians survived and escaped Thanos’ assault, Marvel owed us footage of that

I think the reason that Gamora’s backstory was changed was because showing her parents being killed in front of her would have been more violent and more terrifying for the audience. It also would not have lent itself to demonstrating Gamora and Thanos’ relationship. But it still could have been done a certain way to make it less disturbing and had the same effect.

Tony got at least the idea for Nanotech from Wakanda. 

“No more surprises, I promise.” *Doctor Strange shows up* To be fair, that surprise was unplanned

Tony Stark needs to be in control because he is scared. It was true in Age of Ultron and Civil War and it is true now. 

I don’t think Ned heard a word of what Peter said on the bus

Spider-man showing up out of nowhere during the fight against Maw and saving Tony’s butt is such a great entrance, I’m so grateful we have Tom Holland as Spider-man in the MCU

Doctor Strange in his own movie was pretty cool, but Doctor Strange at his full powers in Infinity War is MIND-BLOWINGLY AWESOME

Tony built the IronSpider suit because he just KNEW that something bad would happen and the suit that Peter was already using wouldn’t be enough. 

Bruce’s struggle against the reluctant Hulk is sad but it’s hilarious

The GOTG entrance is RAD, it’s the raddest thing about the whole movie, the Guardians of the Galaxy are the grooviest thing since ever

Also their reaction to Thor is straight-up hilarious

Really, Thor, why didn’t you just stop to hang out? Do you really need a Thanos-killing weapon that badly? 

okay maybe he does

Rocket will regret leaving his friends so brusquely

Vision disguised as human in public is everything

If the WandaVision TV show isn’t as cool as their fight in Edinburgh I don’t want to watch it

Vision might be badly injured for most of the film but he is not a helpless damsel in distress and he won’t go down without a fight, and that increases my respect for him so much more

but on the other hand, if they can get the Mind Stone out of Vision’s forehead w/o killing him, they should. There’s no reason for him to die. C’mon, bro, don’t be a doormat. You’re a person and you have value! How many times have you said that about other people? At least twice in my fanfiction. 

What other thoughts did Vision have about the Mind Stone? I’m intrigued. No, scratch that, I’m beyond intrigued.

Star-lord needed a better plan for confronting Thanos on Knowhere

“Swear to me on your mother.” Gamora knows how much PeterQ’s mother meant to him, she knows how much he’s never recovered from her death, she wouldn’t have made him take that oath unless it was serious

I remember the first time I saw IW, seeing the Red Skull as the guardian of the Soul Stone SHOOK me

Also he refers to the ‘stones’ plural--Schmidt KNEW!

Peter Parker pays attention to popular film and culture in ways that matter--like, that’s where he gets ideas for how to do things. He’s good to have around

Stephen Strange should have called out Tony for wanting to run from the other Avengers for personal reasons, that was at least one factor on him deciding to go to Titan

Is it just me or is Tony Stark the first person to actually refer to Doctor Strange as “Doctor”?

Nebula :’( :’( :’( 

I have issues with the Stormbreaker arc but really though the scene with Rocket and Thor talking it out is so good

I think Thor, to an extent, is faking his anger, or at least using it to mask his sadness. he doesn’t need revenge he needs a hug and a blanket--I mean not that the universe isn’t at stake if Thanos isn’t stopped but yeah man. He was actually crying while he was talking to Rocket

Rocket probably thinks Thor’s family is pretty messed up and he’s absolutely right

You may have thought after the first GOTG movie that Rocket’s thing with prosthetics was a joke, but no, it’s pretty serious

Peter apologizing to Stark and Strange in advance in case he lays eggs in either of them was actually a pretty good thing to do. It’s something I would do.

How hard did the story development team have to work to find a part for Peter Dinklage?

Whas Okoye being sarcastic about the Starbucks comment? Is she really happy about the Avengers being there or Wakanda’s new foreign policy period? 

Oh Bucky <3 <3 <3

Proxima Midnight is FIERCE #femalevillaingoals

“You are in Wakanda now. Thanos will how nothing but dust and blood.” How prophetic. 

Ieitri has known Thor for a while. Probably since Thor was a kid. 

Nat’s face when Thor shows up in Wakanda: “Would’ve been nice if you showed up ten minutes ago.”

I don’t think Wanda needed to be with Vision for his surgery. If she had stayed out in the battlefield the Avengers and the Wakandan army might have stood a better chance. But then Idk who would have protected Vision so...

The Titan team’s plan to snare Thanos was pretty good, but it would have actually worked if they’d given Quill a job for after they tied him up

Sam and Rhodey teamwork--I’m here for it. Wish we’d gotten more of that instead of Civil War. Heck, I need a Sam and RHODEY tv show!

I love how Bruce Banner finds his moxie

Why did the one guard put Nebula back together? If he knew that Nebula was so bent on killing Thanos why did he do that? Would Thanos have ordered that?

Nebula must have gone to find Gamora and warn her that Thanos was ready to make his move sometime before Ragnarok happened. 

How much did Thanos know about Sutur and Ragnarok? Was he watching? 

Plot hole explanation: Loki took the throne and withdrew Asgard’s troops from its territories, Thanos came to Nidavellir and ordered the gauntlet made. You’re welcome. 

Wait, no, Loki withdrawing Asgard’s troops also paved the way for Thanos to attack Xandar also--Loki was trying to protect himself but instead he gave Thanos free reign to collect the stones

(if they’ve had a couple of years since Ronan attacked, though, shouldn’t they have rebuilt some of their military by then?)

Seriously, Wanda, way to go sister. 

Even if Thanos can’t die without getting his head cut off he can still get hurt pretty badly with the right weapon and I don’t think that’s a fact to be ignored. 

Okoye’s face when T’challa turns into dust before her eyes. Then her watching the Decimation as it happens around her, she’s ready to CRY, she is TERRIFIED

#we're in the endgame now #The Final Countdown #Avengers: Infinity War

[jaremish]

Turned out this way

Pairing: Demon!Dean x Sister!Reader

Warnings: Scary Dean (I guess?), angst, needles, maybe some fluff idk

Word count: 3512 (jesus christ)

Prompt: “I don’t want you to be afraid of me.” [x]

A/N: Hi, hello, this is my longest one-shot ever. Idk what came to me I just wrote and wrote...and wrote. Well, here you have some Demon!Dean action. (This is not beta’d sorry) Happy reading y’all!

Masterlist | Taglist (or send an ask)

The iron door to the bunker opened with Sam stepping through. He had a grim facial expression and in his hand he held a box with the words “Human Blood” in big bold red letters.

He started to talk down towards the dungeon and without a word you followed him. There, Dean was sitting, inside the demon trap, glaring up at both of you when you walked in.

“Really?” Dean asked with an impressed face as you and Sam walked closer, showing the human blood to Dean’s vision.

“For whatever it’s worth, I got your blood type.” Sam said to Dean, giving him an uneasy smile.

“Sam, Y/N, I know y’all are gonna try to fix me but... did it ever occur to you that maybe I don’t wanna be fixed?” Sam had his back to Dean, opening up the box with the blood. He was preparing several syringes on the table as Dean started to speak again.

“Just let me go live my life, I won’t bother you,” Dean said as he looked you in the eye, smiling creepingly after the sentence. “What do you care?”

“What do I care?” Sam finally snapped, turning to face Dean.

Sam opened his mouth to answer back, only to shut it and turn back to the table, getting the holy water. You watched as he splashed it on the floor, starting to chant in Latin.

“You think I’m just gonna sit here like Crowley? Getting all weepy while you shoot me up?” You looked at Dean with big eyes, feeling scared of him already. “Well, screw that. I don’t want this!”

“Yeah, I pretty much figured that out.” Sam answered back, glancing at you standing in the corner of the room.

“You don’t even know if this is gonna work, do you?” Dean said in a cold voice. “You know, I got a hell of a lot more running through me than just demon juice.” He said then, looking up at the syringe in Sam’s hands.

Giving up on Sam, he turned to face you. “You’re not gonna let him do this, right? It might kill me Y/N.”

“This is not you Dean, please.” You whispered back, Dean scoffed at this.

Sam walked closer to Dean, holding the syringe tight in his hand. His face held remorse, he hated this, not knowing if this would save him or not.

“Sammy... You know I hate shots.” Dean tried one last time.

“I hate demons.” Sam replied, stepping closer to Dean.

Dean’s eyes went black a second before Sam throws holy water at him. You let out a scream, afraid that Dean was going to hurt Sam. Dean yelled as his skin sizzled, and Sam plunged the needle into his arm, earning another yell from him. Dean groans as Sam empties the syringe into his arm.

“Look, we got a whole bunch more of these to go. You could make it a lot easier on yourself.” Sam said with a shaky voice as he backed away from Dean.

Dean glared up at you and Sam with so much hatred that your eyes started to water. Dean’s eyes widen as he grunts and groans, the blood already taking some effect. Both you and Sam started to look at him worriedly.

Sam then rushed you both out of the room, telling you to get a nap or something before they had to give Dean another shot. With tears streaming down your face you nodded quickly, making your way up to your room, only to full on sobb as you mad contact with your bed.

Sam was sliding another needle into Dean’s arm as Dean groans in pain. You were standing in your usual spot in the corner of the room, watching them both. Sam backed away slowly, not taking his eyes off of Dean.

“For all you know, you could be killing me.” Dean grunted, obviously feeling a lot of pain.

Sam turned around to look at you, giving you a look as if he wants you not to worry. Sam had been pretty cold towards you lately, but he knew you hates seeing any of them getting hurt and not being able to do anything to help.

“Or... You’re just messing with us. Either way, the lore doesn’t say anything about exceptions to the cure.” Sam answered, leaning against the table in the room.

Dean chuckles a little before he says “The lore. Hunters. Men of Letters. What a load of crap it all is!” Dean faced you as he spoke again. “Oh, you got nothing?”

“This is not even the real you Dean, we just wanna help you.” You said unseay.

“Oh, it’s the real me, all right.” He said with a small smirk on his lips. “The new real me, the me that sees things for what they really are.” His eyes glared into yours, waiting for you to break the gaze.

“Winchesters. Do-gooders. Fighting the natural order. Let me tell you something, guys like me, we are the natural order. It’s the way it was set up.” Dean said, now staring at Sam, grinning at him. You’d been the first one to look away, making Dean happy that he had won that one.

“Guys like us, still got to do what we can.” Sam back at Dean.

“Don’t be so full of yourself, Sammy. ‘Cause, see, from where I’m sitting... There ain’t much difference from what I turned into to what you already are.” When you heard this you snapped your head towards Sam in confusion, wondering what the hell he was talking about.

“And what exactly is that supposed to mean?” Sam replied angrily, glairing at Dean’s smirking face.

“I know what you did when you went looking for me. I know how far you went.” Sams face paled at this. “Crowley told me all about it. So let me ask you... which one of us is really a monster? Hmm? Starting to come back to you now?”

Your eyes widened as you stared at Sam, expecting him to explain himself. He was breathing a little heavy as he stared at Dean, completely ignoring you.

“You were trying to get a twenty on Crowley and me from any demon you could snag.” Sam stood up quickly, furring his brows as he looked at your shocked face, quickly looking away. ”But Crowley didn’t want to be found, and no one showed when you summoned. But you found a way, didn’t you, Sam?”

“You would have liked to have gotten there before the deal went down, but you didn’t really care about poor ol’ Lester, did you?” Dean said when no one answered.

“Oh, and so you know, I killed Lester myself. And that wife of his married the tattooed guy.”

Sam suddenly slams his hand down on the table, making you jump. “I never meant-”

“Who cares what you meant?!” Dean screamed at Sam. “That line that we thought was so clear between us and the things that we hunted, ain’t so clear is it? Wow. You might actually be worse than me! I mean, you took a guy at his lowest, used him, and it cost him his life and his soul. Nice work.” Dean said with a cuckle.

Sam walked towards Dean again, angliy staring down at him plunging the next needle into Dean’s neck while he screamed in pain.

You whelp at the force of it and back away from both of them. Sam tosses the syringe onto the table, leaning over it, pain and regret on his face.

“Let me ask you this, Sammy: If this doesn’t work, we both know what you got to do to me, right? You got the stomach for that, Sam, huh?! Or maybe Y/N should do it! Would you want that?!”

“She has nothing to do with this, leave her out of it.” Sam said through his clenched teeth, storming out of the room, but not before he grabbed your arm, forcing you out of the room as well.

The next time you saw Sam he was talking on his phone, probably with Cas. As soon as he saw you walking down the hall he quickly turned Cas out, telling him to hurry up before putting his phone away. You had not spoken a word to Sam ever since Dean’s breakout about what he’d done.

Sam turned around, not being able to look you in the eye, to see Dean exactly where he left him, but completely still. Sam walks over to him quickly and slaps Dean across the face.

“Hey! Hey! DEAN! Come on! Come back.” He yelled in his face shaking his shoulders, causing you to turn your face as well, moving over to Dean quickly, fearing that he might be... His eyes opened to show confusion, causing you to let out a breath you didn’t even know you held.

“Yeah, if you... consider drowning in your own sweat while your blood boils ‘okay.’” Dean answered while coughing weakly. Sam stands up and backs up while you stand still next to Dean.

“Look, I can’t stop doing this.” Sam says with a sigh.

“Sure you can. You just stop! There’s no point in trying to bring your brother back now.” Dean said while Sam gave you a look as if he wanted you to back away from your brother.

When you didn’t move from your spot Sam said “Oh, I will bring him back.”

Dean glared up at Sam before speaking again.

“In fact, your uh... guilt-ridden, weight-of-the-world bro has been M.I.A. for quite some time now. But I’m loving the new model: Lean, mean, Dean.” He turned his head towards you when he said those three last words, causing you to take a step back.

“Right.” Sam said with a nod.

“You notice I tried to get as far away from you both as possible? Away from your whining, your complaining. I chose the King of Hell over you guys! Maybe I was just... tired of babysitting you both, especially Y/N. Or always having to yank your lame ass out of the fire since...” Dean laughed a little. “Forever.”

“Or maybe... Maybe it was the fact that my mother would still be alive if it wasn’t for you, Sam. Maybe my father would still be alive if it wasn’t for you, Y/N. That your both very existences sucked the life out of my life!”

Sam turned towards Dean with a forced smile, looking at you when he spoke next.

“This isn’t our brother talking.”

“You never had a brother! Just an excuse for not manning up. But guess what: I quit.” His sudden outburst made you jump completely away from him.

“No. No, you don’t. You don’t get to quit. We don’t get to quit in this family! This family is all we have ever had!” Sam yelled.

“Well, then, we got nothin’.”

“Would you say that to Dad?” Sam asked him quickly.

“Dad? Oh, there’s a prize. There’s a man who brainwashed us into wasting our lives fighting his losing battle! Made his own little girl, who had the chance of getting away from this life, hunt already in a young age!”

“Oh. Ooh. Is this you manning up?” Dean said as Sam turned his back on him again, preparing the next syringe. You looked between Sam and Dean, wishing all of this fighting would just end. Wishing Dean was your older, caring brother again.

“This is me yanking your lame ass out of the fire.” Sam said as he jabs the needle into Dean’s arm, filling his veins with the human blood.

“You’re welcome.” He said as he walked out of the room, leaving you with Dean gasping in pain behind you.

You were laying in your bed, minding your own business when Sam stormed into your room with panic in his eyes.

“He escaped. Hide, and hide good. I’m coming back for you, you understand?” Sam whisper/yelled at you.

He left without your response and you quickly shoot out of your room, trying to come up with a place to hide. You ran into the kitchen as quiet as you could, hiding inside one of the cabinets on the floor, pressing your hand against your mouth to not make a sound.

You hear doors slam in the distant, coming closer and closer to you. You clenched your eyes shut praying for Cas, praying for anything. Silent tears made themself down your cheeks.

Dean would know what to do in a situation like this. He would always teach you things like this and how to hide. You knew he’d find you, He knew you all to well. Hell he was the one who taught you all of this shit.

You hear slow footsteps coming into the kitchen. They walk around a little before they stop just a little bit away from where you’re hiding. The person opens the drawer right on top of you and rummages through it as if he’s looking for something.

You hear him step away from the drawer before he screams out for the both of you. “Come on, Sammy, Y/N! Don’t you want to hang out with your big brother? Spend a little quality time? I know you, Y/N, wanted to spend some time watching that movie you always talked about, huh?”

You jumped a little as he screamed, causing a little noise to come out from where you sat. Panic ran though you as you knew he had heard you. He made a little hum, only to walk out of the kitchen and down the halls of the dunker.

You wait in your hiding stop, too afraid to move, knowing Dean knew where you were. Your hands were shaking violently, but suddenly the light shut off, leaving red light flashing as an alarm begins to sound. This war your cue to leave, and you did just so.

“Samt Sam! Locking the place down. Doors won’t open. I get it. But here’s the thing: I don’t want to leave! Not ‘til I find you!” You hear in the distance.

You hear a clatter in the distance, following the sound in case Sam was in trouble, not wanting to leave him alone.

“Sammy! You’re just making this worse for yourself, man! Oh, by the way, you can, uh… blame yourself for me getting loose. All that blood you pumped into me to make me human... Well. The less demon I was, the less the cuffs worked. And that Devil’s Trap? Well, I just walked right across it. It smarted, but still.”

You walked into a room, trying to find a hiding spot now when you failed to find Sam. The problem was that a door to the room you were in opened and you saw Dean step through. With a sharp breath you quickly hid behind the counter.

Dean flipped the switch, turning the power back on. The door slammed, probably being Sam trying to lock Dean inside the room, only you were inside as well.

“That’s your big move?” Dean said, moving around in the room.

He spotted you quickly behind the counter and he smiled at you, getting closer. You were frozen with panic as he neared your “hiding spot”.

“Listen to me, Dean! We were getting close, okay? I know you’re still in there somewhere. Just let me finish the treatments.”

Dean doesn’t answer Sam as he squatted down next to you with a hum.

“Dean?” Sam asks again, only to get your scream as an answer.

Dean had pulled your hair to get to to stand up, forcing tears and a whimper of pain.

“Y/N? Y/N! DEAN!” Sam yelled trying to open the door for him to come inside as well.

“Hm, oh Y/N? She’s right here Sammy. Not so smart locking the both of us inside the room now, was it?” Dean said as he lifted his hammer.

He threw you down at the floor making you grunt as you came in contact with the cold floor, hard. Next thing you knew, Dean had thrown the hammer towards you, and you desperately tried to get away, only for it to land on your leg, causing you to scream loudly.

You must have broken a bone or something because it hurt like hell. You cried out again, your tears making your vision blurry as you tried to get away.

“DEAN, STOP! Sam yelled as he finally got into the room, seeing you laying down across the room.

“You act like I want to be cured!” Dean said as he walked up to you, picking up the hammer by your side. “Personally, I like the disease.”

“Dean, stop that! Look, I don’t want to use this blade on you! You’ve already hurt your own little sister!” Sam yelled desperately.

“That sucks for you, doesn’t it? ‘Cause you really mean that!” Dean said with a laugh as he walked towards Sam, making him back out of the room.

“Look, if you come out of that room, I won’t have a choice!” Sam yelled at Dean.

“Sure you will! And I know which one you’ll make. Isn’t that right, Sammy? But see… Here’s the thing: I’m lucky. Oh, hell, I’m blessed! ‘Cause there’s just enough demon left in me that killing you? Maybe even Y/N as well. Ain’t no choice at all.”

Sam made a run for it, trying to get Dean away from you, and it worked. You laid there, leg bulging and you moaned with pain. You had to get up and follow them, making sure Sam was okay.

“Come on, Sammy! Let’s have a beer, talk about it. I’m tired of playing. Let’s finish this game!” You heard Dean’s voice, not too far away from you.

You tried to get up, using your hands to steady yourself. You leaned against the walls as you made your way down the halls of the bunker, trying to be quiet. You round a corner to see Dean’s back to you and Sam holding the demon knife against his throat.

“Well... look at you. Do it. It’s all you.” Dean said.

You slid down the wall making you sit at the floor, not having any strength left. Cas appeared in front of you, making his way towards Dean quietly. When he was close enough he wrapped his arms around Dean.

“Dean, it’s over.” Cas said, not letting Dean go. Dean begins to yell, but Cas just held him in place. “It’s over.” Cas said again. Dean grunted, before he stopped struggling, giving up.

You don’t know what happened next before you passed out, falling over from your sitting position so fall against the floor again.

It had been a couple of days since Dean was cured and you had not come out of your room so far. To be honest with yourself, you were scared. Scared of Dean. You couldn't face him without thinking he might hurt you.

Sam and Cas have been bringing you food since then. You blamed why you didn’t walk out of your room on your leg, though you were sure they all knew the real reason as to why you stayed in there.

Dean has been beating himself down over you for a while now. Knowing your screams at night were because of him, and what he had done to you. He regrets it so much, and he doesn’t know oh to fix this, how to restore your relationship back to how it was before.

He saw Sam making his way down the hall with a tray in his hands, and he ran up to him taking the tray from him. Sam gave him an uneasy look, not really sure if this was a good idea. Dean just shook his head, wanting to see you at least once this week.

The door to your room opened and you froze when you saw Dean with your tray of food. He smiled a little as he made his way over to you, placing the tray of food on your nightstand next to the bed.

You watched his every move as he sat down on the bed next to you, but still not too close to make you uncomfortable.

“I don’t want you to be afraid of me.” Dean said as he looked up at you. He had tears in his eyes, almost on the edge of crying.

This made you cry yourself and you threw yourself at Dean, hugging him close to you, not wanting to get go.

“I love you kiddo, I hope you know that. I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” Dean said into your hug.

He hugged you close to his chest and kissed the top of your head, just happy to be close to you. He squeezed to gently to him, not wanting to cause you even more pain than what he already had and smiled a little. Glad that this turned out this way.

Glad that he had his little sister back.

Tagging (crossing means that I can’t tag you)

@chennyetomlinson @sammywiththegoodhair @im-forever-a-fangirl @whocares006 @iliketowrite02 @dubuforeveralone 

#dean x reader #dean x sister!reader #demon!dean x reader #demon!dean x sister!reader #dean winchester fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #spn fanfic #my fanfiction #teen!reader #reader insert #one shot #dean x you #dean winchester x reader #spn x reader