#but also im in love with him so i cant 100% be terrified im still swooning | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jennilah · 2 months

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I think i started to follow you bc of tiny!cas, like eons ago, let me tell you seeing you get into different fandoms over the years has been a delight.

I remember seeing post of you going like 'hey these slasher film kinda go hard' and look at you know.

I mean this in the best way possible, I feel i've been watching a house plant grow, every now and then catching my attention and being amazed by the changes

omg thats such a sweet way of describing my... well happy autism awareness day everyone, its a nice way of describing the way i naturally transition through my Special Interests lmfao

actually, for the holiday, let me infodump about this very aspect of my brain to anyone who isnt aware how this works for me. (also every autistic person is different, so this is just how this symptom manifests in me)

ill say "phases" to simplify, though thats an unfair word because it implies im "over" my past phases. 99% of my past phases are pretty much there for life, but in the back of my mind. (So long as I didnt have a "bad breakup" with it for some reason, which is rare but happens) The ability to become a raving lunatic about it is dormant until someone asks the right question.

There can only be one interest (sometimes 2, with one being the less dominant one) at the forefront of my brain at a time, though. that defines the "phase".

so for example, my recent Halloween phase is "over" and I am 100% fully into Saw now, but I still absolutely love Halloween and Michael and Jason and all those guys. as evident by me still happily sharing gifsets and art and buying merch etc if it tickles my fancy. They're just hanging out in the background of my mental display case.

yea whoever follows my tumblr for a very long time has watched it happen in realtime. the transition between interests. i know for a fact which phase I started this blog on. if you're here from the beginning, youve seen, in order:

-Durarara!! -Deus Ex -Supernatural -Godzilla -Detroit: Become Human -There was like a few weeks where it was HLVRAI -And then it was plants. There was a year-long stretch with no Special Interest and I was latching onto odd things (and I was very inactive here) -Halloween & Friday the 13th -and now, Saw

I have many other things I love, but they don't clamp around my brain in quite the same extreme way.

my phases can last any amount of time, anywhere from a few short intense months to 5+ years, its completely random, completely unpredictable. even the interest itself is impossible to predict. its not something i choose, its something that happens to me.

sometimes i avoid watching things for a long time because im still very emotionally attached to my current phase and im genuinely afraid the shiny new thing will replace it. all art or fic ideas for the previous phase? theyll be abandoned. all I will want to create will be related to the new thing. (though I will sometimes draw it anyway, like digging up old toys to play with once in a while. The likelihood just drops considerably)

which is why right now i pretty much put a pause on the other franchises I plan on watching. I'm genuinely gripping onto Saw like someone is tryin to take it from me.

and then sometimes im like "haha yeah right. ill be fine. ill eat my shoe if my brain latches to this" and then put on the movie and by the credits roll im a new person (yes thats what happened with Saw. I really had no idea.)

this is also why im terrified of even just "checking out" things that have, like, a toxic fanbase or something, because i cant stop a new phase from happening if it does. and its really hard to keep it to myself, fuck

(do u know how mad i was when i realized i was attaching to hoffman the evil dirty cop??? i was so scared of drawing him, dudes. but thankfully everyones been cool abt it and we're all very aware of his awfulness & we have fun w it)

and every time my brain changes and i do get obsessed with some new thing, i get really scared and worried and hope I dont bother everyone who followed me for something else :(((( and yet, every time, im absolutely floored by how many people choose to tolerate my newest nonsense and stick around anyway

anyway ive lost the plot of what point i was making here OH YEAH thank you!

tl;dr: that would be the autism! thank you, it WILL happen again! that is a threat! 🥰

#jennilargh #jenna answers

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merwynsartblog · 4 months

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eh i should ramble about monster au thingy (i am still thinking of a name shush im slow w/ names) uh warning this will be very scattered

marxin owns the home the guys lives in. he came back alive one day and went to the house with maymay in his arms and saw 4 monsters completely change up the place and make the house clean and tidy- made him fucking panic edd died due to a car crash a few years before the present. he doesnt...really remember wtf happened he just knew he used to drive pretty well

the guys ages are sorta weird. marxin is the oldest edd is the second oldest edd is 3rd oldest tord and tom are the second oldest and matt is the youngest actually out of the adults- (i wish i knew how to explain this better man-) tom and matt has to carry stuff when they are out of the house. tom has to carry a fuck ton of water due to him being a siren and raw salmon with him. (ey a man gotta eat-) while matt has to carry alot of sunscreen and skin care products and a tinyyyy amount of blood (that he gets from tom) just in case he get blood withdrawls Eduardo, mark and jon are not monsters in this au but sorta like..."if i find out yall are monsters im going to call the monster hunters" and its just a pain to deal with em. matt since he cant see his reflection always asks the gang if he looks nice or good. he is veryyy self consious about his looks since he just recently turned into a vampire. marxin usually has to tell him he looks good before matt believes them mayline is the reason marxin is alive. maymay messed around with alot of forest stuff and kept dropping it off at marxins grave and then BAM he rises tord and tom actually slightly gets along. they like causing problems but their relationship is like brothers marxin is usually on edge since he is pretty much the only one who can die again(except mayline and tom and matt but they dont think about it alot) and he doesnt wanna go back into the ground. marxin is pretty much the only one who can understand gabriel ( @xinxxu oc ) and the other guys are just "0-0. dude he not talkin." the guys are fucking terrified of nash ( @lynniezdoodles oc) except tord. tord likes messing with him with stories about how he slayed 100 monsters one time (coughcough he killed humans but he aint tellin him) marxin likes ollie (again @lynniezdoodles oc) since he reminds him of mayline but scared of screwing smth up with lynn (again @lynniezdoodles ) since she already fucking dislikes the gang also marxin only eats dead animals. he wouldnt dare hurting anything. but the gang realllyyyy hates this so he always has to eat outside- only one who really doesnt mind this is matt- when tom is in the house he rests in a bigggg pool in the living room. he fucking loves his pool he called it susan (im funny sh) edd still has ringo but she a ghost kitty kitty- uhhhh thats all i got lmao

#ew au #eddsworld #ew tom #ew matt #ew tord #ew lynn #ew gabriel #ew oliver #ew edd #ew nash #marxin the sleep deprived #mayline the lil sis #teehee :3

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acaciapines · 8 months

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If you’re still doing songs - song 69 and 138?

im always up to do em lets GO! i'll put both above the cut n then talk below :)

69. It’s Called: Freefall – Rainbow Kitten Surprise

king misses his mom. he misses his sister. he misses his aunt and his grandparents and mari trying to pin him down and luz letting him crawl under her covers and eda hugging him when he grabbed for her and firefly chirping good morning and good night and throwing out her wings to keep him safe.

“kiiiiiiiiing,” the collector whines, flipping upside-down through the air. “you’re so boring, what is your problem?”

“just tired,” king says. it’s hard to look at the collector straight-on. the thoughts that surround him are a messy array, and barely any of them are his, the way they are for anybody else: it’s a weird conglomerate of old thoughts like those that drift through the sky, but so packed together he can’t make anything out. it’s a beach of golden sand the collector runs through, leaving kicked-up grit in his awake.

“naw, c’mon,” they needle, landing right in front of him. “you’ve been tired forever. be fun!”

he misses his family so bad he’s sure it’s a wound spilling out of him. how can’t the collector see that?

“okay,” king says, “fine. let’s play.”

138. Habits – Genevieve Stokes

ask anybody: edalyn-owlbert clawthorne was never planning to have kids.

never really interested her. not the settling-down part, not the needing to keep another living creature alive part, not the having to be a good influence, gag. nah. kids were never going to be her thing, and so she never sought them out.

and then the little buggers found her.

well. she’s technically the one who stumbled across king, the owl beast’s faltering flight into that abandoned ruin he was living in, but king was the one who followed them both and refused to be left behind. plus, that stone-monster was going to kill him. eda wasn’t a fan of kids, but she didn’t want to leave them for dead, either.

looking back she’s pretty sure the owl beast was laughing at her.

laughed even harder when she took in luz. you’re an apprentice, kid, eda had told her, and the girl had squealed, and her daemon had sat there on her shoulder with her tiny chest puffed out, and something in eda knew this was going to be a permanent thing.

oh well. at least she skipped the changing diapers phase of things.

Discussion

for the first one: oh! hey! this one is relevant to for the future which im writing right NOW! ive been thinking a lot recently about how kings gonna be Doing in that entire like, 2-3 months he's basically on his own with the collector, because i'll be expanding out from what was shown in the show, and just...god. poor kid.

its terrifying! im a collector lover but even i'll admit he is Not great with king, especilly towards the start, and thats not going anywhere--king misses his family and the collector has been on his own for so LONG, and has this sense of entitlement to kings time + space. why does everyone else get a lifelong friend with them since birth? the collector wants that! and if they werent born with it they'll find a friend then! like KING!

its just a LOT. it makes for fun writing though kdnfkgdfg king doesnt hate the collector but oh boy is he not actually friends with them.

this one also makes it pretty obvious what im doing in regards to king being a titan lol but ive decided not to talk so explicitly about that unless im asked a question in which i cant speak around it. i gotta keep some of my secrets!

for the second one: MOM EDA MY BELOVED sorry i literally love that trope so much okay. its so so fun to write. eda really tripped and fell into parenthood like ah shit now ive got to be responsible for HOW MANY of these guys now? two? three? am i supposed to count mari and luz as one or two because based on the day that is a WILDLY different answer.

but yeah <3 its also made even more funny that firefly knew 100% what she was getting into. this was a massive shock to eda, but firefly's been a mom from the start!

also ooooh got that owlbert mention huh wonder what that is about...wonder what my owlbert secrets might be....if he shows up at all....hmmmm...

#ask #toh #daemon au #king clawthorne #eda clawthorne #the collector #i write #also keeping owlbert's name is actually so funny thinking about it #eda's parents really looked at their newborn daughter like 'yeah. fuck it. name him owlbert.'#and a grove of palistrom to you

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omgitsbeewave · 6 months

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hi i saw the post you rb about taking to someone so hi!

if you’d like could you rank your favorite jimmy ships?

i’d also like to add that i love your art its so cute aaaaa

omg, hi, hiii!!! i just really like to talk to people but i'm little tired of capturing other blogs like i used to bc rn my little goal is to make cool designs for royal au and theres no interesting stuff i could just say without someone asking me about it

ooooh, ranking is cool! for me, as you can tell, solidaritimes is the most important one. i have them in many aus even if its just "they was learning how to kiss on each other in the middle school under the staircase bc jimmy was too awkward to tell scott that he doesn't know how to kiss" or a literal au where scar is stuck on empires smp season two bc grian felt betrayed

also my favorite one is zedlidarity c: they are so cool, i have three aus with them (i still like team blossom + jimmy, they are adorable). zed is more bold i may say in what he talk and do and butt jokes are funny from him, okay

the next one... ranchers. im not talking about them a lot (but im doing them in royal au) but they are cute, especially compared to other jimmy ships and how people treat jimmy... tango is a good guy

skizzledarity. yes, im calling them by this name. they are something between zedlidarity and ranchers, i like them but mostly neutral, tho i drew them so yeah

solidarian. i have some guys that ship them. i mostly see them as brothers, but i could see them as lovers too (not brothers then), i drew them as well

neutral for me - impulse/jimmy bc im mostly scarpulse person, sorry. mirror birds, romeo ships them, i think they could be cute but im not doing anything with martyn at all. jimmy/mumbo, jimmy/etho, jimmy/bigb are all the same, im not so interested in this all, but i can see them being cute (tho mumbo is not really my guy at all)

flower husbands are controversial, i like them being bad, to show scott as guy thats not good example for a relationships. i know this is not very smart to say, but i really cant see arts of them being happy and stuff, i think about how scott treated jim and :( tho i can see other ships with scott as something cool (majorwood, copper husband that are not allowed but no one can go into my brain and just kill all the thoughts about them)

smallidarity (is thats the name)? i can see bad boys all together but bc of how i started to watch empires... i was really afraid and mad at joel and im on my way to like this guy a lot, but empires god joel is still in my nightmares (not really, but thinking of him is terrifying me a lot)

fwimmy (i think thats the name) is 100% not for me, kinda the same reason as the previous one, but without fear + fwip is not my guy at all

+ something i think could be interesting, pixl/jimmy, i think this one is actually a cool guy, i haven't watched him enough, but he was really nice from what i remember

and oh why thank you! i really appreciate the words ♡ i have some problems that i see my arts like those kid fandom drawings, that i could be proud so much bc i made something but others sees it like ew cringe... im working on it, changing some stuff, learning so i could be more confident about my arts (i always wanted to be like the cool artist with realistic style that can be kinda stylized, but im not sure if i want this for myself rn, i like my style, it just need some changes, like eyes and maybe colors)

#thank you so much for this ask i really liked to reply to it ♡♡♡#beewaveofthoughts

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quinnonimp · 1 year

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do you have any favorite books/movies/shows? (this is me asking you to ramble about your favorite piece of media, I'm in the mood for special interest talk.)

ooo im not much of a consumer of media but one of my favorites is homestuck !!!! ill talk abt it, but mind u im kind of horrible at talking abt my interests </3

im not that old of a homestuck fan (only got into it around 2020 i think) but FUUUUUCK its such a huge part of my life and probably my longest hyperfixation, might even be a special interest with how much i still think abt it at random intervals or small associations

im honestly a little of scared of falling back into my hyperfixation of it though ? theres a few small reasons but i think its mostly just me being scared of commitment to anything as always (which is probablt also why i barely consume media) . recently i was REEEALLY close to but new ccquackity/ccwilbur activity dragged me away to safety lmfao (if u could even call a dsmp/tntduo hyperfixation safety)

smth i rly love abt homestuck is the way its so incredibly focused on characterization rather than story

like YES it does have a great story but its clearly messy n weird n hussie just kind of throws anything up in the air and just the dumbest shit ever can happens, and while that is aswell smth i absolutely fucking love - the characters r a way bigger deal n more interesting than anything the story will conjure up, and thats definitely my favorite way of writing media

cause like, yknow, good characters can absolutely save a bad story, but a good story cant rly save bad characters

plus theres so many characters and theyre all so well written that its easy to find a fan for each of them

my favorite character is 100% gamzee, im so fucking normal abt him, like oh my god i love that dude so much and the little idealized version of him i have inside my head lmao . mostly the earlier stuff is what i like of him though

fun fact ! hes part the reason im not scared of clowns anymore . i used to be terrified of clowns so when i first read homestuck i thought he was the most annoying freak in the world and DESPISED him, until i started looking more into purplebloods and gradually liked gamzee more until suddenly clowns r now my entire personality

i have so many reasons to love gamzee, but a lot of it has to do with just the plain fact i relate to him and when i see him i go "damn hes just like me fr" . like just . idk . his mannerisms n the way he dresses n looks r pretty similar to mine nowadays - except the whole "murderous instincts" thing, i think . and because of the way i havent read the comic in a while this self projection has really marinated itself

hes also sooooo brasileiro nordestino bc i said so 🤏

other favorite characters of mine are roxy, jade, kurloz, aradia, meenah, and calliope . plus, hes not a favorite but: when i got into homestuck i used to be a way louder energetic person, so my friends would say i was literally karkat, which infuriated the hell out of me x)

classpects is one of my biggest interests in homestuck, i fucking love them so much, im such a personality wizard i will latch onto anything personality related so hard . theyre great for initiating 60 page analysis on favorite characters (or ocs) and are so amazing for characterizing ocs its crazy, and aswell as to just classpect friends or random funny shit . i love them !!

in fact once i made an entire analysis to my friends as to why mosquitos r thiefs of blood, and there were so so so many more reasons than just the funny idea of classpecting a mosquito something called "THIEF of BLOOD"

though what i think a lot of ppl forget though is that while yes theyre heavily based on personality, theyre based on narrative aswell, which is why a real person can never have 1 set classpect all throughout their life since we well dont know the narrative we live in, we dont know our paths or our conclusions or how we'll end up and thats an important thing to know when classpecting since the way to godhood in sburb is a personal journey to self improvement, yknow ?

(though ofc if u wanna classpect solely based on personality go right ahead . the world is yours)

in this era of my life id consider myself a maid of space (which is a cool as fuck classpect and gets me the coolest powers EVER !!!!!!), but 1-2 years ago i considered myself a rogue of blood, then a rogue of rage, then a rogue of space (i was very rogue-ey), plus a few others here n there, and if i were to classpect myself from 3-4 years ago i would be a witch of rage/blood

i just think seeing the way change happens and the way we can see that change through a silly lens such as classpects is cool . with the way my obsessions work im obviously gonna look at the world with anything that associates with my interests in the back of my head, so im gonna start classpecting something like a glass jar if i take a look at it, and thats fun as hell !!

ive changed a lot throughout the years just as everyone does and im gonna continue changing, so who knows what classpect i end up with in another year or two ! its fun to think abt

ill leave my thoughts with that but thanks for asking :.))))

#anon #mailbox #quinnotalk #tumblrimp

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peppapiglover · 1 year

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I had a pretty productive day playing sdv today!! 😄 For context I am currently Winter 16, Year 3

Winter 11 - got my first ancient fruit!! I found an ancient fruit artifact back during Year 1 - I gave it to Gunther & he gave me a single seed but my dumbass assumed that ancient fruit seeds are a one-time harvest & I would have to keep replanting them (I confused them for starfruit...) so bc of that assumption, I never bothered planting my ancient fruit seed. I was scared it'd take me forever to get a second seed (my dumbass fr forgot the seed maker exists) but at the end of fall, I was like "yolo, I'll just plant it & see if anything good comes out of it 🤷" It's been growing ever since then but Winter 11, I got my first harvest ❤️ I put it into the seed maker & it gave me back 2 more seeds so those are growing now. My greenhouse is strawberries only but I plan to replace them with ancient fruit. I've been told the game feels too easy and boring once I start growing ancient seeds so that's something I'm concerned about. But I'm also aiming for 100% perfection so idkkkk. I plan on making a new save after completion to keep myself from getting bored with sdv but I also need the 10mil clock for perfection, & the fruit would help financially. so idk!!! I'm worried but not worried

Winter 11 - First prismatic shard drop in the caverns! I've earned two prismatic shards before. One found in a mystic stone in the quarry, and my second from reaching the top of the volcano dungeon. But I've never gotten any rare drops like this one during a cavern run so this was definitely exciting. I have been avoiding the Skull Caverns for literally foreverrrrr. The ONLY reason why I bothered going into the caverns was because I need dino mayo for the missing bundle, and ig dino eggs are better dropped in the caverns... I'm still very new to skull caverns so I was not expecting to get one this early and it made my night!! I got this one on floor 48 I think, which adds to the excitement bc all the bad drops are at these levels

Winter 13 - I finally did all of Mr. Qi's quests (just like skull caverns, I've been too terrified of doing anything Qi related so I've been avoiding him LIKE THE PLAGUE.) I was finally allowed access to the casino and I dunno why I was ever scared bc he honestly seems cool af (but yes im still scared of him for some reason)

Winter 14 - my first time seeing the 10 heart event with Harvey 🥺 HONESTLY........... I like Harvey. I think he's adorable........ but I cannot bring myself to LOVE him. I can't! I want to join the Harvey hype train so bad but I JUST CANT. He's missing that little something, that oomf, that I need to be able to love him. Plus, he's the town doctor and IDK the patient/doctor situation does not help. But I like his character!! And his cutscene was so cute!! I myself can't see romance with Harvey, but it's fine, I'm loyal to my beloved emo frog boy 💙

Winter 15 - I got another two prismatic shards from omni-geodes! I had about 110 geodes from the skull caverns (I did not realize how easy it is to get them from the skull caverns) so I spent that morning bouncing between my farm and Clint's. I donated one to the missing bundle and the second to Gunther

Definitely a productive day!! My to-do list for tomorrow is super long too

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cosmicjoke · 2 years

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(insert Adele song) Hello, its me.

It wasn't actually an ask, it was more like I wanted to reply normally, but Im scared of that aggressive anon to get at me, so I am hiding as Anon.

I was basically trying to school that mofo. It was as if Anon wanted another mental breakdown from Yashiro, and till then it's obvious he regrets it all, and not with a smug smile? That Anon to me felt like they read the manga in one night, and focus only on what they want and not what they should.

They forget Yashiro IS a natural liar. Lies are his shield. Lies has been one of the things that made him survive. He lied for decades about his masochism, his love for pain. DECADES of lies. You cant expect him to suddenly tell truths to someone he meet again for days.

Your AA (aggressive anon) also seem to forget Yashiro is starve of love, to the point he doesn't know what that is. How that feels. Obviously he doesn't know how to react when he received that, or when finally he understands that, or when he is slowly accepting that. Yashiro right now is still in an accepting phase.

Remember he lived in a love-less environment and was only done violence since 8yo. Imagine living in that kind of life... cause I cant. Even Misumi treats him that way, I hope AA didnt ignore that. Least not forget he has lived under the care of Yakuzas since his teenage years? Living and breathing that kind of life is only natural to expect him to exhale violence as well, like shooting Doumeki or hitting that Hirata crew with a stick.

It was a shocker to him to realise that 'thing' that we normal people call love exists. In referencing the forbbiden fruit panel, which is Doumeki. He he has known it just cant admit. Not without self-loathing attached.

Yashiro is confusing? of course he is, thats the point! Doumeki confuses the hell outta him? Didn't you (AA) see how he acts differently towards Doumeki compare to everyone else? Doumeki scares him. And still is! I dont know if this is obvious, but to me Yashiro is flustered whenever Doumeki is around. He doesn't know what to do with himself, that he may seem cold or casual, but he's really terrified.

And yes, this is Yashiro's story of self-healing. It's slow but then when have you seen a BIG wound that healed over night?

The cage bird is Yashiro and he will always be cage and in the dark for as long as Misumi has him bound to this world and Doumeki is that shimmering light that attracted him...so yeah be kind to Yashiro and let him have that glimpses of light. ( Im referencing those glitters when he thought of Doumeki. It was kinda cute. ) Lets all wait and celebrate now he's slowly healing. So much of himself he has admitted.

AA should study and broaden their understanding of trauma. How that affects people. Watch documentaries of real people. Grow some human sympathy. Saezuru must be so overwhelming to them compare to other BLs that focuses on smut. It irk me when they pass the word "suicidal" so easily like a comedy skit. In case it's not obvious, AA, this is also tag as psychological.

Anyway... that's basically it. Saezuru is not for everyone. I never have thought I would see someone like AA strolling in here, thought they only crawl in twitter and mangasites. lol

I wish you a good day, Cos. (:

Hi anaon, and thank you so much for sending in your message again! I'm really sorry I deleted it the first time, as you obviously put a lot of thought and effort into it.

And everything you said, is 100% correct.

With Yashiro, it's imperative, in order to understand his character, to also have a grasp on his background, the way he grew up, the environment in which he was raised, the abuse he suffered, and continues to suffer. You can't ever understand his character, or why he is the way he is, or why he does the things he does, without first understanding those other things. And it seems painfully clear to me that that other anon doesn't understand any of it.

And yes, exactly, lying and deflecting are tools with which Yashiro has learned to defend himself. Truly, the ONLY way he's ever had of defending himself. It's HIMSELF he lies primarily to, in fact, as a means of coping with the horrific abuse he's suffered in his life. By convincing himself he's always wanted it, that he's always liked it. It isn't out of some malicious intent, it's out of self-preservation.

And yes, again, Yashiro was raised in an environment of violence, being sexually and physically assaulted by his step-father starting at eight years old, and lasting until he was, what, 16? That kind of horror isn't even conceivable to most of us. We can only look at it at a remove, and understand objectively that it's awful. But we can never know the true pain and terror and misery of that kind of abuse unless we ourselves have experienced it. So when I see these kinds of idiots like this anon going off about how unfair Yashiro is being to Doumeki, or how he's "using" Doumeki, or whatever other tripe they were spouting, I get seriously pissed. It's just a breathtaking lack of compassion on display. And indeed, the violence of Yashiro's world continued on into adulthood. He was taken in and entrapped in the world of the Yakuza, and it was either adapt or die at that point. His entire life has been filled with violence. The only example he's ever been set in terms of solving problems, or getting out of situations, is through violence. It's all he knows. It's one of Yashiro's great tragedies, that he's a genuinely kind and compassionate person who, through no fault of his own, was born into and then later further trapped in a world of cruelty and violence. And you make a great point, when you say that for someone who's grown up knowing only cruelty and violence, it's absurd to expect them to know how to react or deal with it when someone, for the first time in their life, shows them genuine love and affection. Yashiro has never know the like. He's never been treated as anything but a punching bag and a joke. Of course it would befuddle him, to be treated, for the first time in his 36 years of life, like an actual human being. And of course it scared him, because he was also being forced, through that love, to face the reality of how he'd been treated before. To face the truth, that what was done to him was wrong, and irrevocably damaged him.

Also, this anon acts like Doumeki is the gentlest soul to ever walk, and has never engaged in or displayed violent behavior in his life. lol, okay. Doumeki is way more violent than Yashiro. For one, Yashiro hasn't, that we've ever seen, killed anybody. But Doumeki sure as hell has. He killed an entire group of men, in fact. The one's who kidnapped Niki. He beat his father nearly to death (not that it wasn't deserved), he routinely attacks and assaults people with no hesitation. Doumeki is a pretty violent person. That's not to say he's a bad person, because he's not. He's a good person. But he isn't some wilting flower that Yashiro has been oh so mean to. They whine about Yashiro shooting Doumeki without taking into any consideration the mental state Yashiro was in when he did that. The fact Yashiro was suicidal, that he was going to try and make a serious attempt to end his own life. Like you said, they toss that word around like it's some kind of joke, like it's not a big deal. It exposes just how bereft of compassion for psychological suffering they are, that they couldn't see or just didn't care how much pain Yashiro was in at that point in his life. He wanted to DIE. He genuinely did. He shot Doumeki because he was desperate. He needed to keep him away, because he knew Doumeki would intervene and prevent him from being killed, and possibly get himself killed in the process. Doumeki wasn't listening, wasn't going away, words weren't working at that point, despite Yashiro's best efforts to drive him away with them, and so he fell to the last resort of violence. He was trying to protect Doumeki, and give himself the chance to end his own life. But, again, this anon clearly doesn't understand ANY of that. As you said, this manga isn't just BL, it's a psychological study of the affects of trauma and child abuse. It deals in a serious manner with very serious subjects. If they can't handle that, then they should stop reading, right now.

Anyway, thank you for resending your message! I really appreciate it!

#saezuru tori wa habatakanai #twittering birds never fly #Yashiro #Doumeki

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sanchoyo · 1 year

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arc v 66-80 thoughts! oh my God So Much Happens All The Time. we got to the fourth opening/ed already??? im halfway into the series I think and im shocked by the implications of the op/ed (that we'll seemingly be spending another full arc in synchro. not complaining I just thought this would be shorter, at this rate most of the series will be taking place in synchro wont it?? whats the synchro to standard episode ratio...)

-aaaah crows kids showed up to watch him duel and it had him worried for the majority of the duel. cute. (also I hope theyve been ok since hes been in jail/here at the friendship cup locked in a fucking room) im glad he won…

-….and concerned bc Crime Dad broke into yuyas room to tell him the losers (and also ppl who get taken from the prison) go to some kind of underground garbage plant to basically be WORKED TO DEATH. see when a few eps ago we learned some ppl get taken out of prison and never return I assumed they just were. shooting them to kill them out back like ole yeller bc of overpopulation. nope! cant decide if this is better or worse than that assumption… both are pretty bad…

-how tf is layra supposed to do a riding duel!! theyre so tiny! where will their emotional support stuffed animal sit! tf! im glad yuya and crimedad are treating this as awful as it is and are also pissed. what the FUCK and god layra RUNNING to yuya and clinging to him and yuya tearing into reiji saying 'if YOU wont protect layra /I/ will!' LIKE. LOVE THIS ENERGY YUYA. I feel like reiji is 100% withholding info about layra but still. kid is TERRIFIED and yuya had SO many valid points (layra still wanting to be with big bro reiji and trusting him auugh)

-reiji is a bit Too Calm abt all of this so I cant imagine this is his first time handling this kinda situation. and layra having a goddamn meltdown panic attack when reiji leaves and running after him BEGGING him not to leave and saying 'ill do whatever u want!! always!!!' I DONT LIKE THIS. NOT ONE BIT. at least reiji was like 'its okay. im proud and happy youre defying me bc it means ur developing a will of your own' and having ninjaguy fight in layras place…like. very many feelings abt this. I still can't fault reiji 100% either bc we Learn layra is from a 'war torn region in a certain country' I KNEWWW IT I KNEW LAYRA WAS ADOPTED the timeline with reijis dad going to academia didnt make sense for reiji to have a younger sibling. my original theory was xyz dimension but it didnt look like heartland in the little bit we could see. so just some random war-torn country…um. so they have ptsd. and reijis mom is like 'yeah hes got no will so he can be a useful asset to us!" throw the whole woman away. tf is wrong with u ppl. at least reiji is defying his mom on this and wanting layra to be happy… oh…reiji im so sorry sweetie both u and layra have such shit parents….maybe its actually for the best reiji took layra with him, i would not fucking trust his mom with this kid! reiji is just Cleaning up his Parents messes. actually that perfectly explains his Hyper Responsible personality. he prob never got to be a kid….IM SO SAD. AAUGH! ygo is nothing w/out family drama

-…yuya getting mad reiji sent ninjaguy in layras place but dude SOMEONE wouldve had to go if not him?? what do u want reiji to DO yuya hes working with what he can and hes prob 10 steps ahead anyway

-yooo shinji is fun actually, I feel like him and shun would get along great. both freedom fighters. shinji trying to start a RIOT with his duel. love that. (also just love ninjaguy too. i didnt love either enough to root for one or the other, im fine w/ whoever wins but shinji had a CAUSE yk)

-so reiji is fine w them being sent to the forced labor place. I mean. all of them but the top winner WILL be so ofc he had a plan to get them out of that. not at all surprised bc hes been THEE best at planning and staying cool as a cucumber. not even worried abt it if hes in charge. if reijis not worrying neither am I

-smile chojiro is a great character. i love his whole motto 'dont be ashamed of defeat, dont be complacent in victory' im also glad he didnt just throw the duel to keep yuzu from going to the forced labor camp (I mean…/i/ would have if I was fighting a 14 yr old girl kajhfkj gotta protecc the kids or whatever) but that wouldve cheapened her win. I KNEW she would win and im so proud of her. yuya tearing up when she used his catch phrase to let him know shes ok ;__; god that duel made me SO emotional theyre both great

-I knew serena would win fast against some rando named 'tony' with the blandest design ever. did not disappoint. but the other characters made comments like 'oh if I wasnt dueling today I coulve slept in'…theyre only doing like FOUR DUELS PER DAY IN THIS TOURNAMENT?? PEOPLE GO TO A STADIUM TO SEE (4) DUELS???! oh my god thats so ridiculous. how much is a ticket in???…how long have they been in synchro dimension??? like, they were in jail a While too werent they?? so like. a MONTH?? LONGER?? everyone is gonna be so behind on school when they get back. yes thats what im worried abt.

-yuya getting mad this is all unfair and yelling its wrong and the 'friendship cup' should be canceled bc the losers just get sent to the forced work facility (slave camp. yuya, just say it for what it is) is like..well whatre you gonna do abt it! we already had a lil speech abt how the 1% of this world are living it up and the 99% are in slums, having to clean up the MASSIVE waste the 1% cause and having to struggle to SURVIVE and your only NOW getting really pissed abt it? (also, too real) you HAVE a pocket demon we havent seen in like 30-40 episodes…bring it out and let it eat the rich people and the cops! whats the problem!

-OH MY GOD. jack atlas and reiji and layra hanging out having dinner together. i am going to lose my mind. HE THINKS YUZU HAD THE MOST PROMISE OUT OF ALL THE DAY ONE DUELISTS TOO!!!! BRO. JACK. JACK U ARE THE BESTEST EVER!!! SAME HAT!!!!!! also the fact no one else is Eating but layra has a full course is so funny jsdkj whyre they all just having tea? did they finish before them or…

-god damn jack is different…he seems more mature? he called the commons his origin and his pride and is super observant of layra and says he wishes he couldve seen them duel and. tbh thats cute and probably smth layra needed to hear (I am still FIrmly against letting this child on a motorcycle tho) jack. jack i love u

-god the card jack got inspired by was the one he gave to sam who was UNGRATEFUL FOR IT. i cant believe this. this jack is SO nice i love him so much

-tf why is the crowd cheering a cop on a bike and booing yuya. yuya im SO sorry for these dumbasses. /I/ am cheering for u. AND HES TELLING THE CROWD ABT THE LABOR CAMPS!!! HEY YUYA I LOVE YOU SPEAK THE TRUTH. im sorry the crowd is…Like That! theyre all CHEERING like 'HELL YA WE LOVE WHEN THE LOSERS GET SENT TO WORK CAMPS TO DIE!!' WHAT THE FUCK!!! jack is like 'dude they only care about WINNERS opinions' HAHA speaking from experience aren't u jack. hes kinda right tho. WIN and THEN make ur speech. its all about TIMING unfortunately

-hey the cop has a fusion card. WHERE did he get that? reiji says a rat is in and my first thought was dennis, but hes been locked in his room too, right? (and lets be real I dont see fucking DENNIS as a real threat. nor do I see a random literally characterless faceless cop as a threat, but its the implication a fusion person snuck in synchro and is sabotaging our Heroes)

-yuya's eyes lit up for like 0.2 second. I wish I could tell if that was yuto's influence or yuyas demon (?? I need a better name for it. but we havent SEEN it in like. 30-40 episodes LMAO let alone had any kind of explanation, so) I geeeeeet that sending ANYONE to the horrible forced labor camps is bad, but yuya. you gotta get to the top if you want ppl to listen. you cant single handedly do much, you are 14. 'bc of me he was sent underground' if it wasnt him itd be u. and its not like u took him there urself, chill yuya. we'll fix this stuff im SURE

-oh my god shingo v yugo is happening. I am SHAKING. the SILLYBOYS. I want them to interact MORE. I figured yugo would win (since im sure we'll get a yuya v yuto match based on the op…) but shingo put up a GOOD FIGHT and put on a good show and im proud

-…yuya seems to be able to directly tap into yugo's thoughts when their dragons are like resonating and seemed to be losing his sense of self. concerning? we havent really seen serena or yuzu do smth like this so im like. is it rly Just smth abt the yuya counterparts?? very unsettling scene. yuya has SOME level of influence too bc yugo said yuyas lil fun catchphrase (smth both yuzu and shingo caught…) …is that why yuya kinda absorbed yuto ?? bc hes like. the Alpha Counterpart or smth. ?? horror movie stuff!

-sergey is the scariest man ive ever seen. christ. he 'died' once before and can CONTROL MINDS?? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.

-omg ninjaguy snuck into 'hell' to make sure everyone is ok. is THAT reijis plan? just rely on ur personal ninja to do everything? ok tbf if /i/ had a personal ninja Id Do The Same Damn Thing. im sure eventually hes gonna use him to get them out…the way I believe in them…

-theres a rumor roget is from another dimension so he def is. like working with leo? not at all surprised. hes def getting the duelists from hell from gallagar to send to fight in the fusion v xyz war is my assumption

-STOPPP LAYRA PLAYING JACKS WORDS IN THEIR MIND TO INSPIRE THEM AND APOLOGIZING TO NINJAGUY WAS SO CUTE.

-yuyas letter to yuzu was also Cute

-god why does shun keep having to duel Secretly Fusion ppl this sucks for him LMAO. not that I think Fucking Dennis can beat shun but STILL. at least shun is like 'no hes def bullshitting' like hes a smart cookie.

-…what the hell are they going to do if dennis DOES show his true colors btw? theyre all kinda stranded in another dimension rn. are they just gonna let him go to the underground plant and not get him out too?? jkhfksdf omg I CANNOT see reiji doing that. i feel like dennis is enough of a weenie we can bully him into switching sides. the tension between shun and dennis tho…preddy thick. pretty spicy

-Oh! hes got ancient gear cards! didnt the prof from gx use those? that tracks. fun callback

-reiji not even PHASED by dennis being academia hes like. and? and bitch? you got smth to say? to the council. LMAO I LOVE him no bullshit with him ever

-oh HELL no dennis was the one who STARTED THE ATTACK ON HEARTLAND (that he calls the hunting game) BECAUSE HE FOUND RURI??? 'i wanted to keep doing street shows' WELL YOU SHOULDVE.

-omg ruri's design is SO cute. shes got feather motifs! does she also have a birdy deck like her bro! thats cute! I hope so!

-SORA IS HERE??? HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HERE??? HIIII WELCOME BACK !!!!! BEST SURPRISE

-dennis being like 'now that ive cast aside being an entertainer, even the action cards have forsaken me?!" no…no bud its prob bc YOU caused debris all over the field. so still kinda your own damn fault which is funny to watch

-SHUN SNIPED DENNIS FROM SPACE. BEST FINISH TO A DUEL EVER. EVER EVER EVER XYZ REPRESENT YES SHUN YES!!!!! he was aggressively trying to turn him into a card and when that didnt work (reiji modified his duel disk lmao) HE TRIED PUNCHING HIM AND GOT PULLED AWAY. WAS HE GOING TO BEAT HIM TO DEATH THE OLD FASHIONED WAY??? SHUN. PLEASE. i love u.

-waaait is 76 just a recap ep. booooooo ive been binging these i dont NEED a recap. I JUST watched them all in a row like a maniac. im watching this ep on 2x speed to make it go Faster. smh. I do kind of appreciate a streamlined explanation of why the council ppl kept roget around even knowing hes a snake but Still.

-oh, its also interesting yuris job seems to be taking the yuzu-counterparts? do him and serena know each other? i dont THINK weve seen them interact but idk! since all of the yuzus and yuyas seem to be friends its just interesting hed be chosen for that job

-ok only the first half or so was a recap? cool. slowin it back to normal then...

-…what the fuck is kings gambit. he put MIND CONTROL CHIPS IN ALL THE COPS BRAINS? HOW? Roget is going against academia for his own purposes. reiji immediately calls him out on his bullshit invitation to help. fucking love you reiji

-sora got dennis hahah. how do sora and dennis not Know each other. it was weirdly nice of sora to help dennis and sora is like. Determined to get serena and yuzu. but. We Will See about that. I feel like serena is just gonna pummel him into a pancake and yuzu will give him a smack with her fan and a tight hug and he will break down like a little nervous chihuahua. this is my prediction.

-new op and ed this ep too btw! LOVEEE the new op, prob my 2nd fav next to the first one. really good soft metal sound. new ed is also REALLY GOOD. awww all the girls together!! and even. sora and jack next to each other. god last ed was my fav but this one is FIGHTING it I cant pick which I like better LMAO theyre REALLy good. interesting imagery too. MAYBE im reading too much into it but jack and sora are both on the outskirts of the grass…are they going to interact? and sora is sorta balled into himself and turned away from everyone else, but he very much still IS with them in the grass. makes u think….

-also the ed has yuri in it and ruri and rin finally. theyre also hanging out and being cute. when will yuri and the girls join the gang. we can all be friends :3 even if ur a lil squirrely evil guy its ok!

-…also shingo blushing and looking at serena. WHAT. have we gotten any inkling of a crush on her from him?? we havent right??? like HUH? she does punch him in her sleep which is so funny KJHADKJF but like. theyd be the funniest couple ever im wheezing

-yeah ok this is my favorite ed so far. its so goddamn cute theyre all just RELAXING TOGETHER BEING ADORABLE. sleeping baby layra and reiji sleeping in his glasses like a nerd sold me.

-I'm around the halfway point of the series I think! thats fun! …none of my big questions have been answered in any substantial way yet hahah. I'm hoping the next arc..we get to see yuri more finally (and for yuto to make a comeback, which. obv he must before the series ends…) and also I want to see ruri and rin more!!! and more lancer interactions in general I want them to hang out and be buds…I know the whole plot is stopping an inter-dimensional war which does fuck severely but I just. dunno. some slice of life eps would be nice after this arc…everything has been go go go fast heavy for a while and i need. a breather (that isnt a recap..)

-something I realized about Character designs (im in the middle of doing fanart while watching haha) Yuya's dad is dressed like a ringleader. yuya is clown-coded (aka part of the ringleaders circus). yuyas dad disappeared. so…would it be insane to assume he might be Behind stuff, like a plot twist villain? I know hes at least INVOLVED SOMEHOW (he gave yuya his pendulum necklace too didnt he…much to think abt) ….hm…. also! fun thing I didnt notice until now is yuya is color matched with his odd eyes isnt he? both are red/green? thats so fun

-yuzu v sergey was a big pile of bullshit. she didnt deserve to lose the first match of the 2nd round. I saw it coming and it still pissed me off. i wanted her to WIN, or at least get to the finals! generally just really annoyed over it. fuck you sergey and fuck you to the ppl who wrote it like that

-yuya v shinji (who I cant help but think of as a k-mart generic brand yusei from the neurotypical section instead of my Beloved Brand Name Yusei from the Autism section) was Tough. yuya is trying to fight for an interdimensional war (…his goal of making everyone smile pushed aside for the moment…which is like. fair. rn dueling is a tool of WAR or REVOLUTION we cant do those with smiles usually…) but shinji is trying to start a revolution against the upper class…neither of them are WRONG and it sucks but yuya as the main character Couldnt Lose. And the stunt Roget pulled after sucked for everyone :< ...cant believe crow actually believed it tho god. I know its for plot reasons but imo hes smarter than that..

-I will say im SO glad sora is back. omg hiii sora :D he 1. saved yuzu 2. WENT TO MAKE SURE YUYA KNEW YUZU WAS OK??? so fucking good Im so Glad. (also bonus points to ME for calling this happening. sora NEVER had any ill will towards the two of them, i KNEW he was attached to them) hes gonna join up soon isnt he :3c i KNEW it. <- pleased I called this (tbf I thought itd happen way later but who knows if its actually happening now or if yuyas just planting seeds of doubt in his brain. sora already is calling academia a hell so. he just needs a gentle lil shove in the right direction...also I want to see him and shun make up an be buds. that might be asking too much tho...shun doesnt owe him forgiveness but...it would b CUTE)

-then him and yuya just sit and talk about it…sora admits theyre his first real friends I AM LIVING RN. BEST BEST TROPE EVER. HE HAD SUCH A HARD LIFE TOO FUCK U ACADEMIA. he SCOURED academia and even checked standard to find yuzu…so sweet… his big plan was to let yuya let him take serena back home instead of yuzu and thats like. even IF yuya was that heartless (which hes obv not…) and they did that, its a band-aid solution bc dennis will prob report yuzu… ergh.

-yuya said he TRUSTS SORA TO KEEP YUZU SAFE. IF HE CANT HES GONNA FEEL LIKE SHIT. HES /GOTTA/ SWITCH SIDES NOW JKDHAKFJ

-they then hype yuri up more like 'ohhh its only a matter of time before they send him!' PROMISE, ROGET?? I WANT TO SEE MORE OF HIM. ITS LIKE. EPISODE 80 AS I TYPE THIS….I THINK WE'VE GOTTEN LIKE. 1-2 MINUTES OF SCREENTIME FOR HIM EVER.

-BY THE WAY. sora is a goddamn parkour master, jumping around on buildings and stuff my god. I know he was trained and stuff by academia whcih we saw a bit of in a flashback montage…but its lichrally insane. anime parkour

-oh my god crow v shun is next. why do birds have to fight….. sad! my prediction is crow wins just bc shun doesnt have any real personal stakes rn...I mean sure the lancers are trying to prove their might or w/e but on a personal level shun has no beef w crow or synchro yk. whereas for crow hes got beef w jack (and now yuya possibly due to the shit roget did lol) so. obv feels like crow will win for meta reasons. same w/ whoever serena ends up dueling later, but we'll see!

anyway. look at them. :)

#arc v #sanchoyo liveblogs arc v #ygo #sanchoyorambles #we got a jack reiji dinner momence and shun sniped dennis from SPACE. what else could i ask for #and sora is BACK!!!!#YEAAAH!!!!!#my predictions are 100% coming true also im VERY pleased abt it #not that it was like. a twist or anything given the context but im STILL glad

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self-h-rmageddon · 1 month

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ughh

i keep having like? i keep having dreams where my mom protects me and its kind of upsetting me

why is it so frequent? i keep having them where she keeps me safe or says she'll always be here for me, and if its not my mom directly its some motherly figure protecting me. im like GROWN TOO im not a little kid but i always feel like i am, i feel so powerless, helpless, afraid.. and i hide behind my mom because she will keep me safe, right?

this time it was my sister, she was being so fucking mean to me like how she used to, to the point where like. i had to go in this building with her and her bf and she told me to get out of the car real hostile like and i was clearly scared and about to cry and my mom was like hey. we'll go together, okay? and she held my hand and the building? was like this dark like. SOME KIND OF LIQUOR/SMOKE SHOP, it stressed me out and then when my mom came with me it turned into a pretty candy store and she let my sibling get whatever they want but . im too conscious of our money so i didnt get anything before the dream switched

then i was at like? the store owner had these policies ensuring people didnt ABUSE THEIR KIDS in her store, saying like hey. if yr kid tries and steals something, ill catch them, no need to yell at them or get physical. if theyre loud, its alright, theres plenty of other kids here so its probably gonna be loud regardless like. idk it made me really sad cuz that meant she had dealt with it enough to make explicit rules about children being hurt or scared in her building. and immediately my brain knew she was someone i could trust

my family like left but . i got in the car with my moms husband instead cuz i thought they were gonna get in but he drove off too fast and then he was being really reckless and driving into oncoming traffic and shit and it was really scary cuz hes like. ive been in the car with him pulled over by the cops cuz he was speeding before he drives so horribly i feel so unsafe when he drives, and yknow who it makes me think of? my mom, because even if my mom has bad road rage, shes safer than him

the car crashed obviously and i was hurt and scared and i just wanted my mom and i managed to make it back to the candy store cuz it had like a proper daycare section now i guess?? and i dont know. my moms bf was like unhinged and i. ive had too many dreams where im afraid of him, afraid of what he'll do. i made it back to the place and i guess the kids there were also scared cuz they knew he was gonna come back and the lady was like reassuring us and she said that no ones getting hurt here, and that shes gonna do everything in her power to keep us safe

idk it made me feel good that like. even though i was obviously an adult she was still there to comfort me and assure me cuz i was fucking scared, just like the kids were i was terrified and she didnt exclude me from that safety

i think i have mommy issues guys 💀💀 i dont know why i keep having these dreams. maybe being neglected as a child makes you grow up too fast and then you suddenly cant be grown up enough when yr actually an adult. when they fight, i feel so small.. i feel like a child again, listening to violence thru the walls. i wish i could be brave, i wish i could be a MAN, be an adult, but im too scared..

why does my head crave that motherly comfort? i dont understand.. my mom isnt a bad mom. shes an okay mom, not a great PERSON, but an okay mom. shes done a lot for me and i appreciate it, but.. be there for me is not one of them. maybe im sad, maybe i wish i could have a mother that i can say with 100% certainty i love. i wish i could have a mom who was there for me and cared more about me and i wish she was .

she used to be really mean to me, after she kicked her bf out several years ago (got us nothing in the end cuz hes fucking back so whatever) . i think she missed fighting and needed someone to focus her anger on. i remember one time she came into my room and screamed at me for doing something wrong? something i DIDNT do, and then when she found out it was my sibling who did it, i guess she tired herself out cuz she just said whatever

it got so bad that like. everyone knew she was treating me unfairly. my siblings thought she was, i thought she was, and SHE thought she was. that time we were sitting in the car with my sister and she was like yeah im too mean to you, you dont deserve that. and i was just. quiet. what do i say? do i say 'yes, you are too mean to me'? probably not, my sister is my moms number one yes man, if i said anything implying my mom was less than an angel she'd direct her anger towards me. AGAIN. but i cant say no cuz that would be a lie. i just said it was fine and she said it wasnt and that was the end of it. i dont even remember if things changed

or like that time? she called me a disappointment for failing in highschool and when i jsut left, and went and sat in my siblings room, SOMETIMES she feels remorse and she comes and apologizes cuz i think deep down she does love me. but this time? no, she just came in and KEPT going, saying it was my fault and that she doesnt have shit to apologize for. okay!!!! that was when the elections were happening too , thats when she started becoming a worse person, more right wing yknow. its sad watching someone i used to admire dissolve into just.. garbage, yknow? ugh

i almost had a panic attack at my grandparents house one time cuz she raised her voice like. not AT me but i was still there and then my sister started harassing me when i got all quiet cuz i was SCARED and my brother and grandma tried to stick up for me but i just went to the back room and i couldnt fucking breathe. and then later my sister had the audacity? when we went to the park later she was like hey. btw. its not MY fault you were being weird like. whatever, fuck off

i wish i loved my family!!!!! i wish i had a family i was capable of loving. i wish i had a family who didnt hurt me, i wish i had a family that didnt make me feel like.. like im not always safe in my home. ive never ever felt safe, from my earliest memories to my most recent, its just.. carnage. dreadful

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rebelcourtesan · 2 months

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Hey I just wanted to leave a comment to say how much I love your writing once again. Especially in the last 2 chapters of Chrysalis; there's just so much to love...

For starters although Rachel isnt as strong as Bridget or Liz shes not 100% weak either; meek yes but she does what she needs to survive like the rest of your protagonists in your other stories and she aint dumb, being smart enough not to follow Val's offer in Chapter1, keeping her mouth shut around him when necessary and not signing with him in the last chapters. And Im really curious to see where her story is headed as making a deal with the Vees in itself was a bad move (but lets be real they wouldn't leave her alone otherwise as they might have other tricks under their sleeve like intimidation or making it seem like its the only way out and Im terrified of what Velvette might do), signing with Vox was indeed a nicer move than signing with Val.

And it was great getting to know more about Brodie's psyque and view on things and you cant help kinda pity him in the sense he doesn't know any better as his parents were enablers for his bad behavior ever since he was young. And Im kinda hoping karma comes for him eventually and also afraid of the fire that's gonna be the next morning in the office when Rachel decides to quit, that is if Val doesn't send bodyguards to tell the news.

And again I love the variety of people you got in your stories; where you got nicer and less nice people as seen with Sinners like Saibon who's a decent guy around his co-stars and made sure Rachel got what she was owed when Marlo and Zack took advantage of her but at the same time he needs to worry about himself too which is why he wont risk his after life saving her ass; plus hes married so he needs to be a lil selfish in order to protect those he loves and Brodie who's a dickbag in more ways than one and im hoping his ass gets what's coming to him for treating everyone around them, specially Rachel, like shit due to his entitlement. And Hellborn like Tisha on the wrong side of people as she's very competitive for male's attention and will do scummy things to get it or bring those she sees as "rivals" (even if they're actually victims of harassment) down like we saw deleting Rachel's work and later on taking a picture of her and send it to the office mail with the intention of causing a ruckus and make her life harder out of jelaousy (although it makes me wonder how many know how the Vees actually operate or just view them as celebreties) but we also got Grix who reassures Rachel her boss is just being a dick and sends part of his money to his family on Wrath and Valerie who's on Rachel's side since the rumor began and defends her and gives her some survival tips as she cant stop what Rachel's going through thanks to Brodie and she's one if the few persons in the office that doesn't think less of her and is actually nice as evidenced by their talk in the bathroom. (Maybe she'll be the one to understand that if she's with Val its certainly not for good reasons, judging by her character)

As for the Vees, although the series shows them with a more humerous side They're still bad guys at the end of the day and I love how you managed to keep that in the story; Val being a creep, slightly stalking Rachel on her first 3 days in Hell, sending his bodyguards to get her despite her telling him no and the whole scene with him in V tower where he roofied her and licked her back like he did Charlie's arm in ep 4 and proceeded to have sex with her even if ahe was drugged thanks to the love potion which is why we dont hear her say no during it and her body is simply reacting to the pleasure intercourse brings but Val is more focused on his pleasure during it and doesn't care if he's a lil rough with her to the point she cries in pain. That and there's the fact he forced her to go to a place she was new to, wear a dress that made her uncomfortable and do a line with him and Ashley. And when she said no, he was almost about to tear her apart if it wasn't for Vox being there. Also I liked him messing with Brodie, feels very in character and reminded me of when he has goofy moments like that with him adding glitter to his gun in ep 2 and him pouting like a child wanting to do violent things to whoever offended him.

And Vox is once again the lesser of two evils but evil at the end of the day as he's the one that gets Rachel to sign by guilttripping her into thinking she's highly valuable to them. And I also love the detail that both have different mysoginist views, with Val thinking like Brodie Rachel should be thankfull they spent attention and time with her when in reality both forced her to do stuff like Brodie spanking her and harassing her and threatening to make it worse for her at work if she doesn't comply with his dehumanizing and embarrasing demands and Val gave her something spiked and banged her while high and later on pressures her into doing a line of coke whereas Vox has this Whore and Madonna complex dividing women into fuck girls or married girls and although not as cruel as Val he gives her a non consensual kiss and makes her say she belongs to him twice out of self pleasure.

I just love your writing and Im very excited where the story's gonna go and Ill wait patiently for the next update, bye and thank you for the hard work you always put in your writing. Take care.

Thanks!

With Brodie's background, I wanted to show how doting mothers can give their son's a bad first impression of women. Brodie grew up with a terrible attitude towards women because his mother never bothered to discipline or teach him respect. HIs father wasn't around to correct his behavior either so now we got Brodie as he is now.

Rachel is a vulnerable and realizes it which makes her smart and able to protect herself when she can.

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honeybee-taskforce · 5 months

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1x03 Rewatch Thoughts and Feelings

same disclaimer as before but now im medicated and sleepy so we/ll see what happens

-corn silos are terrifying and judd is totally in the right this entire situation sorry tk buddy EVEN THO he obviously could’ve approached it way better

-im sure this wont be the last time i say this along the rewatch but this is the first time we see judd in “captain mode” and i can only hope that at some point Owen retires and Judd ends up permanent captain of the 126. Whether it be season or series finale i don’t mind but that’s what i’d love to see for him even if it is predictable. He has such a big heart and is so good at getting people to listen to him (this one time being a non factor)

-his life is in danger if he falls in too but all TK can think about instead of protecting himself is possibly helping save his new friend he’s such a good soul.

-filming the sliding out of the silo with all of the corn HAD to be a blast there is no way it wasn’t

-will we ever find out more about any other members of the 126 like B shift or the ones in the other trucks that arrive with our 126 i wonder cause there are definitely more trucks there than are needed for just 6-7 people

-tk going in for a fight will always hurt to watch but it’s also just so smooth cause they play exactly into his hand

-THE tarlos season one scene i love that this is what they used for the chemistry read because yes its 100% the most important scene between them this entire season

-“you’re free to go” and he keeps talking. They both do. Ahhhhhh.

-tk could just walk away. But this is the first person whose really cared for him and acknowledged his pain in some way. So he eants to make it right. And he DOES. -tk got his apology in so he doesn’t expect anything more so i wonder what his first thought is when carlos actually continues. We know his second once he processes what Carlos has said already lmfao but ugh just thinking about tk walking away without anything else being said and probably thinking that they’re still on bad terms… or i guess neutral at least. But carlos adding his little jab and smirk shows that everything is going to be fine. -i COMPLETELY forgot about this MNT bit with the food eating contest lmfao good to know that the paramedics have always gotten their own funky calls throughout the show I remembered that as something that only happened with TNT.

-carlos already showing his sarcasm and sass in this scene with michelle when he grills her for never asking about his life lmfaooooo i love him sm

-carlos cant get him out of his head because he knows thats his soulmate

-owen and wayne’s scene is so important because it obviously sparks owen telling everyone around him, but it’s also a stepping stone into owen finally coming back to his own reality. -“my people have enough to worry about on their calls. This is my fight.” GEE I WONDER WHERE TK GETS HIS PRICKLY SKIN WHEN HE NEEDS TO DEAL WITH A PROBLEM IN HIS LIFE COMES FROM

-i feel so bad for marjan in this scene and i wish we got some follow up on whether or not she did find a new mosque… iirc unless she mentions it later this season we just never hear about that again right?? Paul tells her to keep her hijab up and walk in proud of herself and from what i remember that’s it?

-both carlos and owen cringing at the yoga girl’s video because they’re meant to be familyyyy hehehehehe

-TELL YOUR SON DAMMIT

-dart scene dart scene dart scene yayayayay

-see carlos is secure in himself BUT how much of it is a front when it comes to tk at this point because i know this anxious man is overthinking every little detail when it comes to their interactions now

-then again he makes the packing a piece comment immediately after i typed all that SOOOOO

-ahhh yes owen’s first instant of violence issues

-judd owning up to his feelings and being honest about why he came at tk ugh this big bear of a mean is such a good person i love him so much

-and tk being honest back and appreciating his words AHHHHHH brothers brothers brothers

-“why didnt you tell me? >:|

from the day she went missing you accused me of murdering her!!”

aw damn he’s got you there michelle… this plot is so goofy especially since we know it never comes back up after this season sdfgrgh

-this lady driving right into a tornado reminds me of my 4th grade teacher for literally no reason other than just her vibes and her outfit idk

the boys are in their flirty stage now and definitely hooking up here snd there still yeah yeah yeah

#honeybeewatchforce #911 lone star rewatch 2024 #911 lone star

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poltergeist-coffee · 8 months

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Plate Anon 🤝 Poltergeist-coffe

Screaming at each other

(also, this remember me something, like, what you like to be called? Just your username or something else, I was curious for a while but kept forgetting to ask)

But yeah, qpac and qetoiles need therapy (like everyone else in this island) THEY ARE IMPORTANT BUT IT LOOKS LIKE THEY CAN'T SEE IT

This make that time qetoiles lost to the codes more painful, because think about what could'vecrossed his mind after it, he failed on his duty, he failed everyone who was counting on him, who trusted him. Sometimes I think qetoiles don't see himself as more than the weapon he holds, that he can't fail, but he's more than that, he is a friend, heis a father, he is a person(or would it be a cucumber?) he's not made of metal, he can get hurt

And qpac just thinks that if someone had to go, that would be him, because would the best choice, right? Cellbit is the main investigator, and now there's Bagi who is also great, Mike has a good knowledge on create and Forever, well, he's the president, he has charisma and dedicated, the n.i.n.h.o is a proof of this, and well, Felps is Felps(to this day I can't explain this man, he simply is), they would left an hole if they left(and worse, they did) it would be notified, people would feel it, and from that point of view, qpac thinks he would be less of a loss if he was gone. But that's the thing, they are all important, their family works in this way, every piece matter, pac felt every loss, again and again, and they felt when he was gone, when he hurt himself to save qforever

(This what I love in the favela 6, if you looked at their past a everyone you might as "how can this be a functional family?", but they are regardless of all the odds)

(☝️ plate Anon aways finding a way to talk about favela 6)

Honestly,this what makes both of them interesting characters, qetoiles had a big responsibility on his shoulders he couldn't fail(I still find funny how apparently he was supposed to die way before than he did in his last fight with the codes, that's the french beast to you) and qpac doesn't see his own worth, like, y'know the day Kameto came back? He was calmly fighting the mobs and even stopped to fix his hair(also if you find the stream you mentioned please tell me Wich one is)

And if I remember well etoiles was the first to mention pac was a good fighter, right? Sadly they don't interact as much as before but they have a such interesting dynamic

Also I remember that I heard that etoiles wanted to have a villain arc back in the elections arc, but I think he gave up because he didn't exactly have a reason, Pomme had two lives and he's literally the strongest person there lol

(Also THAT part of the fandom is a *insert some insult here because I can't find any word on English that isn't a swear* and he could receive a lot of hate, thats why I don't use Twitter)

But he would be a terrifying villain

And I've been waiting for a TazerCraft villain arc since they got arrested, like, I think Pac deserves to go a bit wild

(Talking about villains, while the happy pills arc wasn't exactly a qforever villain arc, I'm surprised how people embraced it, especially the first day the eggs disappeared, the chat was saying to explode everything and kill. Forever even called Pac to calm him down(Wich he did but he also was like "explode everything" too, Pac has potential to be part of the voices in the head that almost everyone has lol)

-God of the 🍽️ Anon

You call me my username, any shortened version of my username or Kasper! I don't mind whichever you pick lol

plate anon im shaking you by the shoulders youre so based your analysis is immaculate im eating your words now they're mine you cant have them back NJKASDNVAKJS

YOU'RE SO RIGHT THO AAAAARGH!!! i 100% agree i think q!etoiles struggles with seeing himself as more then anything but a protector or like what weapon he has. like he was so lost right after he died from the code and it took the code stuff back. he sort of like gave up/lost all motivation and it didnt help that the eggs are gone!! like he couldnt protect his daughter or the other eggs and now he's failed all the islanders because he couldn't beat the code?? what is he suppose to do now??

sometimes a family is 6 dysfunctional people with complicated pasts and one (1) egg and that makes them an amazing family <33 EVEN IF THEY'RE AT ODDS WITH ONE ANOTHER THEY WILL SUPPORT EACH OTHER/HELP EACH OTHER GAAH!! THEY'RE ALL IMPORTANT TO THE ISLAND AND TO EACH OTHER!!

crying and screaming i want them to interact and talk agina TT maybe they will tomorrow... because there's an event and ik etoiles will log on but idk if pac will......... it's okay... i'lll make my own content of them while i wait... sobs....

the twitter qsmp fandom is so TT it can be good but also sometimes its so bad TT like aah there is a lot of hate that comes from there at times,,,, if qetoiles decided to become a villian or to genuinely oppose the other islanders he would be unstoppable like hes so strong kajsdnvkas they're lucky he isn't right now...

I THINK QPAC SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO GO CRAZY!! IF HE WANTS TO KILL I SAY LET HIM!! HE DESERVES IT HE'S BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH ALREADY!! GO CRAZY GO STUPID I SUPPORT HIM!!

i loved seeing forever's chat the first day when we found out the eggs were gone like kjasndvjkas his chat was like "FUCK THE ISLAND GET RID OF IT ALL!!!!" i was also apart of it... i also sort of wanted him to blow it all up.... sorry my bad... i think qforever deserves to do a little crime.... all the stress of being president was too much let him blow up shit i say... (QPac is such an enabler at times akjnvkajs i love him for that)

#✉️ asks or whatever #🍽️ anon

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pikawarrior · 2 years

Text

🌙Welcome to Reaper rambles, a "show" where I just ramble for fun because why not. Today's episode is about video games I've played recently and enjoy.🌙

1 - Momotype.

Momotype is a free horror visual novel on Steam about adopting a cute little Momo. You become a parent to an adorable little creature(?) Who only lives for 7 days. Be warned tho, it hides some dark secrets.

The Steam page calls it

"An experimental, horror visual novel about raising a virtual pet."

And boy, it sure is a horror visual novel. Im terrified but gods i love my son(s?) Momo. Someone get me a plushie of Momo please.

2 - Spiritfarer.

A cute yet emotional game about letting go.

You are probably gonna cry lets just be honest here.

I dont got much else to say cuz im still not over letting Stanley go.

(Btw if u have a netflix subscription u can play Spiritfarer for kinda free through their game stuff)

3 - Persona 5 (Og, Royal, and Strikers).

Gods i love Persona 5, so much so that im buying Royal again but for my switch.

I cant say much to Royal as i havent played it myself yet as ive been 100% completing the og Persona 5, but from all the videos ive seen it is just as great as the og if not a bit better.

As for Strikers, i was not planning to play it but a mix up with trying to buy Royal for the switch lend me to play it. And i regret nothing, it builds off the og story is a way that is satisfying, atleast to me.

And gods i love the way the fighting is amazing. Its like Hyrule Warriors but with a story i actually care about (im joking, but also i do care a bit more about P5S' story more then Hyrule Warriors')

ALSO I adore Alice's design and stuff, like damn.

And finally,

4 - Project Sekai/Hatsune Miku Colorful Stage.

The only rhythm game im good at. Im actually serious this is the only one im good at cuz of how i can customize my speed and stuff.

All the characters are great, Nightcord at 25:00 and Wonderland×Showtime are my favorite groups but i love them all almost equally (sorry More More Jump, i love yalls songs but i just dont like idol groups)

In this household we love and appreciate KAITO. We need Niigo (Nightcord at 25:00) KAITO like yesterday, oh and Len my boi we need him too.

Also we need some mixed unit song covers, outside of the anniversary songs. Like gimme Childish War with Akito and Ena.

🌙That wraps up our show for today, come back [LATER] to listen to me ramble about [TOPICS]. No promises that it'll make sense or be readable next time, i cant be """professional""" for longer then a few minutes🌙

#reaperspeaks #ReaperRambles #Momotype #Spiritfarer #Persona 5 #Project Sekai

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absolutelyfizzing · 3 years

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hole-y

George x reader angst/fluff

description - Y/N and the Order head out to deliver Harry to the burrow on the night of his seventeenth birthday. Chaos ensues and when you reach the burrow, you couldn't be more thankful for your friends and family being safe.

warnings - minor talk of gore and injuries, death, general warning for george being an absolute angel. Fem pronouns and reader gets picked up

A/N - so this is the first time ive posted in like months i think which is a little crazy, im so sorry for the delay. This is something that i just really wanted to write, i will be posting some requested writings soon as well as hopefully some more writings outside of just harry potter and marvel.

word count - about 3600

MASTERLIST

You were terrified. The feeling in the pit of your stomach made you want to cry but you pushed it down. There were bigger matters at hand. Bigger things to worry about. One of those things being the possibility of you never seeing your best friend or your boyfriend again. The thought made you shake and when you looked over at Fred and George you knew they were thinking the same thing.

You had been friends with the twins since as long as you could remember. Well actually, you had disliked them when you first met them, they were much too loud for you to get along with and they frustrated you to no end but you somehow had all of you classes and activities with them. They accidentally let loose a prank on you in your third year and you screamed at them before going up to the astronomy tower and crying. They followed you a few minutes later and apologized and sat with you until you stopped crying. Actually they stayed with you until they could make you laugh. From then on, you had a soft spot for the twins and the same happened to them.

You didn't know when you started to have romantic feelings for George, he always said that he started to feel something for you when he was in fifth year and you sneezed so hard you made a nearby owl fly away. You thought that was rather ridiculous but it made you blush all the same. You started dating in sixth year when Fred nearly shoved you two into a closet and told you he wouldn't let you out until you talked to each other about your feelings. Since then you had been the happiest you had ever been in your life and you were forever thankful to Fred who took 100% credit for your relationship. They were your family, all the Weasley's were. Now, looking at everyone you loved in a room, you felt worry rise in your throat. No, worry wasn't the right word. Terror.

George pulled you into his side and he kissed the top of your head deeply.

"I love you. You don't have to do this." He mumbled into your hair and you sighed.

"You know just as well as I do that we both have to do this. It's okay, I'll be with Moody. He won't let anything happen to me." You muttered and then turned so your face was pressed into his chest. "But I love you too." You whispered and a tear fell from your face and into George's shirt. You then pulled away and pulled Fred into a hug. He groaned dramatically.

"No, I'm hugging you. No complaining." You grumbled and he complied, his hand going around your back and smoothing out your hair. You knew he was looking at George, some sort of twin telepathy going between them but you didn't care. When you pulled away, both of them smiled gently at you. Then before you knew it, the polyjuice potion was being passed around. You gave one last look at George and drank the potion and he did as well. It was the worst tasting thing you'd consumed in a long time and as you were keeping yourself from throwing up at the taste you felt yourself get a bit taller. You looked to your side to see two more harry's. You smiled at them and began to change your clothes.

You had agreed to go as Harry with Moody, Mundungus would also be there as himself. You had decided to switch last minute. You all walked out of the house as the minutes ticked by waiting for Harry's protection charm to end. Eventually you all were off with one last longing glance at George.

The battle was one that would haunt you for the rest of your life. As soon as you left there were death eaters on you. All you could do was hold onto your broom for dear life, Moody on the broom behind you and Mundungus on a separate broom right next to you. Before you could think, there was green all around you and screaming from every direction. You just focussed on getting to the Weasley's, a route you knew by heart, and let Moody do the protecting. At some point you looked to your right and Mundungus was gone. When you looked to your left you were horrified to see the dark lord flying next to you. Tears came to your eyes at the realization that you would probably not be making it out of there. Moody quickly began sending spells his way but it was not an even fight. He held off Voldemort for an impressive amount of time but all good things end. You heard the killing curse and saw the green light and you expected it to hit you, you were the target. Somehow Moody got in front of you to stop you from getting hit and you screamed. When Moody's body fell from the broom, yours did too. You hit the ground with a thud and your body immediately screamed in pain. You looked to the side of you and saw Moody's body. Tears were falling from your face but the shock running through you prevented you from feeling whatever damage you took from the fall. You took a breath and gathered yourself. You needed to get out of here. You would have time to scream and grieve later if you made it out of this alive. The death eaters obviously thought you to be dead and Voldemort had fallen back for some reason. You feared it was because he realized you were not the real Harry. Your tears stopped, face hardened, and you stood with slight difficulty. You would have to get to the Weasley's and you prepared yourself to apparate. When you did, your aim had been a bit off. You were in the bog outside the burrow and you could see the light in the distance. There was a panic at the house and you realized that the others had all arrived. Despite the pain in your legs, you began to sprint to the burrow. You noticed that you were yourself again, your hair getting in your eyes as you ran.

"Y/N?" You heard Remus yell and you kept running. Someone pulled you into them and you looked up to see red hair. You had arrived at the burrow and the tears had begun as well.

"Fred, Moody is dead. Voldemort killed him. Mundungus disapparated right at the beginning, I don't know where he went. It was just me and Moody and then he just-"

"Shhh, hey you're safe now, it's gonna be okay." He muttered and you noticed the break in his voice. You suddenly realized that you didn't feel George near you. You pulled back quickly. "Living room" Fred stated and you headed in, Fred following behind you. When you saw George though, you were not filled with relief. In fact you were so filled with dread that you thought you might just throw up.

"Is he..." you whispered. You couldn't finish your question, dreading the answer.

"m' not dead" Came a whisper from the man you loved and tears began streaming down your face as you collapsed next to him and buried your face in his chest. Your breathing was rapid and your heart was racing. It only slowed when you felt a familiar hand brushing through your hair.

"Fred, I'm saintlike." you heard George whisper and you looked at him questioningly but he was looking across the room to his brother. Fred looked concerned and dropped down next to you, a hand going to your back.

"What's wrong with him? Is his mind affected?" Fred asked his mother worriedly. You were also looking to Molly for reassurance but she looked just as concerned as you.

"Saintlike. You see...I'm holy." George spoke again and all attention was on him. "Holey, Fred. D'you get it?" The relief that you felt was overwhelming and you laughed deeply before burying your face once again into the chest of the man you loved.

"Pathetic. Pathetic! With the whole world of ear related humor before you, you go for 'holey'?" Fred laughed with you, his voice cracking with emotion and the tears streaming down your face were now happy ones. You were so thankful that the man you loved was okay and unchanged besides the trauma he would likely carry. And of course that he only had one ear.

The rest of the night would go by in a blur. You were debriefed by Remus who tried to be as gentle as possible in his questioning. You did not leave George's side and neither did most of the Weasley's. However hours later you still hadn't moved or eaten, too scared to leave George. Enough time had passed that everyone told you George was out of the woods and most people had gone to bed. You couldn't leave though. Molly walked toward you, a plate full of food with her. George was asleep and you were staring at him fearfully, making sure that his chest was moving with life.

"You need to eat, dear." Molly whispered and you sniffed a bit.

"I cant." Was all you could say and she sat next to you.

"Well either you need to eat or I will wake George up so he can make you." At this you looked at her. She had unshed tears in her eyes and you suddenly tackled her in a hug.

"I'm so sorry, Molly." You whispered into her neck where she was holding you.

"What on earth are you sorry for?" She asked.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect him and that I wasn't here to help when he got here. I'm sorry I didn't convince him not to go. I'm sorry-"

"Hey, stop." She asserted and you did, pulling back to look at her. "Now you know why you went. George went for the same reason. You were both very brave and it could have been either of you who got hurt out there. Now you are both alive and okay and so are the rest of my children. I will be thankful for the rest of my life for that. But I still seem to have a kid who isn't taken care of and I need to make sure that she is. So will you please take a breath-" she paused to wait for you to take a deep breath, which you did, "and eat something. Or else I fear my son may have a heart attack when he wakes up. Okay?" she questioned and you sniffled and wiped your nose.

Making one last glance at the movement of George's chest before looking to Molly and nodding. She handed you the tray of food that instantly comforted you and she sat with you while you ate. You were both silent but you were thankful she was there to watch over George while you were distracted. When you were finished she took your plate and stood.

"Now I am going to get some rest. You should consider doing the same." She whispered and patted your hair. You watched her walk to her room and you looked back to the man in front of you.

You weren't sure how long you were sitting there but by the time you came out of your trance to a hand touching your face the fire was nearly out. You looked up at George and he looked sad.

"Are you okay, baby? Do you need anything?" You started to stand up, worried he was uncomfortable. He pulled you down on top of him on the couch and you squirmed, worried you would hurt him.

"Honey, I need you t' stop moving and let me hold you please." He sounded serious so you stopped trying to get off of him. Instead you sighed and moved to straddle his hips and then lay the rest of your body on top of him, your head going to his chest. "Thank you." he whispered. You lifted your head to look at him and he had tears in his eyes.

"Are you in pain, bubs?" you tried to be quiet so you wouldn't disturb the peace in the room.

"No. I'm just glad you're okay." He whispered and a tear fell. You reached up to brush it off and you smiled at him.

"Of course I am, you're the one who got hit by a spell." You reassured but he shook his head.

"You're right that I'm the one that got hit by a spell but Voldemort tried to kill you. You could have died tonight, Y/N." He seemed so sad but you didn't know how to comfort him. You hadn't really thought about it since you got to the burrow, too focused on George. You had yet to really process the fact that Moody had died to save you and without his sacrifice you would not be here with your boyfriend.

"I didn't though. I'm okay." You moved up a bit to kiss the cheek on the side furthest from his injury. "We are both okay." You put your head in his neck and sighed deeply. He took a deep breath into your hair and wrapped his arms around your back.

"We are never doing that again." He grumbled and you chuckled.

"Really? I was planning on taking some polyjuice tomorrow, maybe having another go at it." You smiled and he rolled his eyes.

"I thought I was supposed to be the comedian."

"Not when your last joke was 'holey'. Your comedian title has been revoked."

"Oh shut it, I'd just taken a curse to the head, give a guy a break." He smiled but you both stopped and the smiles dropped while remembering the reality of the situation. "How long have you been up watching me?" he asked gently and you sighed, preparing for your scolding.

"Probably 6 hours or so."

"SIX HOURS? You haven't slept since you got back? Darling you need to go to bed, why on earth did you stay up that long?" he practically screeched and you shushed him as best you could so he wouldn't wake the whole house. You didn't answer his question, instead looking at his chest. "Y/N why wont you sleep?" He asked again, this time more seriously. You felt tears come to your eyes.

"I couldn't-I had to-" you were cut off by your own tears.

"Hey, bubs, whats wrong? I'm sorry, didn't mean t' upset you, bunny." You shook your head at the thought that he had made you cry.

"I was just worried that-" You paused to take a breath, "I thought if I went to bed I might wake up and you wouldn't be..." You felt him shush into your hair. He hadn't really thought about it that way and he felt bad for keeping you up like that.

"Bunny, I am fine. I pinky promise." He pulled away to do just that. As your pinkies were interlocked he made decisive eye contact with you. "I promise nothing bad is gonna happen to me if you sleep, okay?" You nodded a bit and he leaned in to kiss you. "How about we both go to sleep and you can stay right on top of me so you can be with me if anything happens." He mumbles against your lips and you nodded again. He pulled you snuggly into him and put a hand on the back of your head to hold you there.

"I love you." You whispered into his chest, not even necessarily trying to get him to hear.

"I love you too, bunny. Now you need to shush and get some sleep." You huffed and finally settled into him. He couldn't sleep for much of the time you did, he could never admit it but he was quite scared as well. He shared your fears. He was worried he would wake up and you would no longer be with him. He got bits of sleep now and then but he couldn't sleep through the night. You stayed asleep on top of him until he saw the sun come up. He knew you were vaguely awake as your breathing wasn't as slow and you curled into him tighter.

"M' gonna get up to make us some tea, yeah?" You nodded slightly and he took that as an okay to get up. He picked you up gently and brought you to sit on the counter in the kitchen. His head didn't seem to hurt at all which surprised him a bit but he knew his mother was a gifted healer and she worked her magic on him to make sure he would feel okay the next day. He tried to step away from you to make some tea but you did not release him. Instead he was trapped standing in front of the counter, you clinging to him tightly. It was at that moment that the other twin decided to come into the kitchen.

"How's the hole?" He nudged George with his elbow and he chuckled.

"Not bad at all, don't even really have a headache." He muttered, still trying to be moderately quiet as you seemed to be in a half asleep state and he knew you needed all of the rest you could get.

"She doing okay?" Fred whispered, nodding toward you.

"Restless night." George replied and Fred nodded in understanding, moving to prep the tea for George seeing as he was trapped at the moment. When the tea was done, George rustled you awake slightly. "Would you like some tea, m'love?" You nodded and moved to sit up a bit, releasing George and catching Fred making gagging noises next to you.

"Oh shove off." You grumbled and he chuckled. You made a move to get off the counter and George grabbed your waist to assist you. As soon as you were on the ground you made your way over to Fred to hug him properly. You were just so relieved that your favorite people made it out of yesterday alive and Fred sighed and hugged back.

"Y/N, this is 3 hugs in 24 hours. I'm starting to worry about your head. There isn't a hole in it is there?" Fred questioned and you rolled your eyes. You lifted your head and turned it to look at the other twin across the kitchen who stood with tea in his hand, gazing at both of you with a calm and content look on his face. You smiled at him before releasing his brother who gave your hair a ruffle as you turned to look up at him.

"Thanks for being okay." You smiled at him and his gaze softened a bit.

"Right back at you."

The rest of the morning was spent drinking tea and talking, thankful just to be alive. As the family woke up there was more relieved exchanges without the shock and stress that had been present the night before. You rarely left George's side besides to let him get changed and have a private talk with his brother. Eventually Ginny dragged you away to get you cleaned up and changed into clothes that weren't covered in blood and grime. As you walked away the boys began to gather around George. Ron looked at the twins expectantly with a glint in his eye.

"Well? Show us then!" He got out a bit excitedly. Harry smiled as well and Bill seemed to have some jitters. George smirked before a ring appeared in his fingers. It was modest but it was all he could afford and he knew it wouldn't make a difference to you anyway. The boys all shoved each other in excitement and Fred clasped a hand on George's shoulder.

"I know you know this already but I just want to remind you that if you hurt her, all of us wouldn't hesitate to beat you to bits." He smiled but there was not so much humor behind his statement. The rest of the boys mumbled in agreement. George gave them all a look.

"Okay, first of all, I nearly died yesterday. I think you could all stand to be a bit nicer to me."

"We all did, get over yourself buddy." Bill joked and George rolled his eyes.

"Second of all, How come I'm the one getting threatened? I'm your brother."He looked around the group.

"'Cause she's the favorite, obviously." Ron stated simply before leaving the group, Harry and Bill following him, both giving George a teasing smile before they left.

"I think that was rather rude." George grumbled, though there was no malice behind it. He looked over at his twin who simply shrugged and patted him on the back.

"Just the way it is. If you two were to break up, I'm pretty sure she's the one who stays in the family." Fred winked before heading out of the room as well and George took a second to look at the ring in his hand. He heard footsteps and quickly shoved it into his pocket. You appeared in the doorway, hair matted down with water and in comfy clothes, fuzzy socks adorning your feet.

From the doorway you smiled at George who beamed back at you. You felt around in your pocket for a moment where your hands were shoved and when your hand hit the hidden ring there you let out a breath. You stared at each other for a moment, just content to be near each other without thinking about the war for a moment, warm light filling the room and calm in the air, both planning on later asking the other to spend the rest of your lives together.

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