#but smth abt it just clicked for me

[toastsnaffler]

i saw devs when it came out + then kinda forgot it existed for years but i remember rly liking it so im rewatching now and this might sound kinda dumb but lyndon being played by a woman was genuinely a gender turning point for me like its never commented on or made into a whole deal its just. a cis actress playing a cis guy

#i just appreciate that they cast the best person for the role and then didnt go around changing details later to make her fit into it #they were just like well here's this teenage boy. have fun #and ik it was partly bc they wanted the character to look rly young but didnt want to hire child actors #but smth abt it just clicked for me #honestly i respect even garland more for explicitly saying that the character isnt intended to be trans it was just a casting choice #bc ppl were getting worked up like ugh why didnt they just change his character into a girl called lynda. or make lyndon nonbinary 🙄 #like to me thats not the point. gender is already a performance anyway so for someone who performs for a living- #what difference does it make really. #non conformance to gender isnt a trans exclusive thing as well. i think it would be good for more ppl to keep that in mind sometimes #idk if i necessarily identify as trans but id started using he/him pronouns before i first saw devs and smth abt it just made me feel seen #anyway ik in theatre and voice acting theyll often have actresses play male roles but its uncommon in live action tv #so just kinda cool! ok ramble over im gonna go find smth to do w the rest of my morning #.diaries

[s1ithers]

picked planescape torment out of the pool of post-bg3 recs. ~10 hrs in and i love this interplanar city, i am chewing on it, i am turning it around between my fingers. the way it nails the strange-familiar....miévillesque

#clicking thru lore descriptions going ^_^ #there's smth i just love abt old 2d graphics #the mystique #like that's a DUNGEON baby #tho it's not completely down to graphic fidelity bg3 gives me a bit of that too in places #the temple of shar & the shadowlands in particular #that frisson of the otherworldly #i'm always so interested in how exactly that generates bc it's one of things i really love fantasy media for & it's so hard to nail down #planescape: torment

[usereddie]

:P

#there are a few people who show up in my notifs very consistently #i think they might even be following this blog #BUT THEY HAVE MY MAIN BLOCKED so i can never see the tags or what they're saying or follow them back #it's kinda funny but at the same time i'm like pls let me see what ur sayingggggggg #i'm sure they blocked me for some reason or other but CMONNNNN u don't have to follow my main just let me see ur tags on my posts #and i know i'm blocked but they still interact w my posts cause i'll get a notif abt them rb'ing smth but when i click on it there's nothin #and i can see other people on my dash reblog my post FROM them #but when i click on their blog i'm blocked #i'm going crazy #be quiet bia

[monochromatiica]

🗼🧸

unedited closeups under the cut:

#my art #mika kagehira #enstars #enstars fanart #ensemble stars #kagehira mika #pls click the image for best quality! (^.^) #digital art #tw eye strain #injury cw #blood cw #all minor but want to be safe #when the teddy bear is in tokyo or smth i didn’t listen to the song #(this is a joke tokyo teddy bear was my entire middle school playlist) #this song is such a mika song tho hear me out hear me out h- #i kinda wanna write out all my thoughts abt it later but just. the plushie + sewing metaphors the running away the feeling lost and useless #in this essay i will

[corntort]

I looked into stej, including stej 3

What an ending Oh my God 💀 💀

HAH. YEAH. REALLY FUCKED.

#GOOD GAMES i really like just how. Earnest and cheesy they are #theyre a little clumsy with storytelling but idec its a blast. even when my hearts ripped outta my chest #THE HIGHEST OF HONORS THAT U LOOKED INTO SMTH I LIKE that makes me really happy :] #its something i always strive for but dont succeed in very often im glad i could pitch it to u !!!! its a really really nice universe #intricate world built on the remains of our own that lake has crafted and i love it!!!!! i rlly do #also i think its the game that kinda made me click in my mind that i wasnt a man 💀 #game so good it complicates my gender #rambles #ask #anonymous #spark the electric jester spoilers #i reallycant put into words how happy that makes me u looked into stej ill think abt that for weeks now thanks #stej

[waywardsalt]

dungeons in linear loz games made you feel stupid because you’d sometimes be wandering without a clue until stumbling over a little detail you’d overlooked; dungeons in totk make you feel stupid because they hardly seem to trust that you have any more than very basic problem-solving skills

#hi hi hi im still being annoying abt this game #when i have the time im going to give all of my og totk salt posts their own dedicated tag #bitching abt totk #thats the tag ive decided #ill get murdered if i put this in a normal tag #i just. good lord this game managed to piss me off on so many levels #as an enjoyer of games as a zelda fan as a writer as someone who likes a bit of a challenge as a musician with the weird leitmotif stuff #i UNDERSTAND that some people like the totk dungeons BECAUSE theyre easier and this post is not for them #this post is for the bitches who like the experience of being in a dungeon for over an hour #and like even with dungeons its not like a skill roadblock you just gotta fuck around enough until smth clicks #skill roadblocks r kinda annoying in games thats why i typically have month breaks between elden ring play sessions #they just. literally hand you what you need in totk and it usually amounts to ‘use ultrahand’ #the new abilities are good for gameplay and world exploration and shit for actual puzzles #totk salt #that would be a good salty (me) totk hate tag but thats a tag other ppl use and would not be exclusive to my shit #i would walk into a dungeon room in totk and not have to spend more than 3 minutes clearing it and then getting a 5th/4th of the objective #i dont feel good abt solving a problem when i dont actually get to think for myself abt how to solve it #and the key to the ‘puzzle’ is the only other interact-able thing in the room #salty talks

[sunjoys]

am i going nuts or is it impossible to see prev reblogs

#like when someone reblogs smth and tags it prev or whatever #i cant figure out how to go to the prev rb anymore #like normally u click on the name of the personthey rbed from right #but recently it just brings me to that persons blog . which is unhelpful when the post im looking forward is older #idk. im just curious and want to see what prev means. i havent tried on mobile but i cant get it to work on desktop :/ #am i stupid #googling it just gives like..... trim ur reblogs! which is not what im looking for i dont care abt deleting reblogs or w/e #:( #i dont like not knowing things

[exopelagic]

sudden realisation that the thing holding my art back is that I never had an anime phase

#going to find a time machine and get my younger self into death note or smth #I have been driving myself insane for the past few years bc I wanna draw characters but all I know how to do is portraits #I’m trying to figure out how I could recreate smth similar now and tragically I think it does just come down to draw more :/ #however! I am also going to try using brushes which will be bad for sketchiness and better for lineart bc I might need to force myself here #I just gotta simplify things down to basic shapes how hard can it be #[has been thinking this exact thing for years and it’s not worked] #I am getting better every time I do stuff I’m just not satisfied bc art is frustrating when you know what you want but can’t get there #god it’s 2am I should not be awake rn but I could draw again tonight so I was taking advantage #endlessly frustrated by hair. why is it so awkward. I need to understand hair better how do I do this #i have a feeling it’s bc I’ve not figured out how to apply the shit I figured out abt volume yet #I’m also getting impatient bc I’ve been trying to do a study thing for some art styles but I decided I wanted to draw ocs instead of that #when I hadn’t gotten to the actually important bit which was. making smth new. but I can still do that #and I ended up doing a different style anyway (someone pls stop me rounding everything make me use high opacity square brush for my health) #the Other problem is I never wanna switch brushes. like I want to use one brush for whole drawing bc the extra clicks annoy me #I wonder if there’s a shortcut to swap brushes #anyway I’m gonna stop complaining bc drawing is fun but god I wish I’d drawn some more pokey mans when I was a teenager yknow #ideally younger. would rlly like to not have to actually think to figure this out rn #I’m probably overthinking stuff anyway honestly and I KNOW I’ll get it if I practice enough but goddamn it is hard to practice #especially when my me insists on making the bad things look better by making it more realistic #instead of figuring out why the shapes aren’t working #OKAY IM DONE WITH THIS NOW. GONNA TRY NEW ART THINGS LATER STOP TALKING <3 #luke.txt

[cunninghamchrissie]

let characters w chronic issues not be magically healed through the power of love challenge

#text #i don't wanna be a bitch so obvs i won't mention specifics but like #no eddie will not cure chrissy's ed w the power of his magical dick #eds are lifelong illnesses and it makes me feel like shit when they're tackled in hellcheer fics for a single sentence #only for the next one to be 'and she never purged again :)))' #bc i can't just shake my ed easily like that #and the one character i bonded w so strongly having such a huge part of her dismissed like that feels bad man #isn't it more fun to write when characters have meat in them anyway?? to be explored?? #anyway obvs this isn't abt anyone i follow or anyone whose fics i've commented on #if i don't like smth i'll just click out and rant abt it in private where they won't see #but like damn #let chrissy be broken so i won't feel like such a piece of shit for being broken myself lol

[arolesbianism]

Almost got too comfortable with liking a whole 3 25ji originals and tried listening to a 25ji cover playlist before I remembered that I do indeed still very much not like a good 99% of their covers

#rat rambles #sekai posting #samsa has become one of my favorite sekai songs period and bug and inanndesu are both alas absolute bangers #but one of those is hard carried by the story its tied to and the other is bug so it just kinda plain goes hard #but fr they sound sooooo fucking good in zamuza and the lyricssssss god #songs that hit harder if I close my eyes and pretend its more abt kanade than it actually is #Id be lying tho if I said that they dont sound good in inandesu #like bro it doesnt deserve to be in my top ten sekai songs but it still is so #like it goes hard they sound good miku sounds good the event is one of my favorite sekai events its so unfair #y'know truly these three songs are representative of my relationship with 25ji as a whole if you think abt it fndjfbdh #I went into bug not expecting it to go so hard zamuza hit me hard but took a lil while to appreciate the other members in it and inandesu #stuck in my brain against my will #and mizuki fits into this cause theyre the only 25ji member that isnt tied for my favorite sekai character lol #like look they have good originals. just none that I like the group cover or even the misuki solo of #like lower is pretty good. I hate the 25ji version tho #idk maybe Ill like kitty more in the future if I end up giving it more of a chance but it doesnt rly call to me rn #also on a almost related note god I wish I could like the vbs version of hitsuji ga ippiki more but idk why it just does not click with me #idk if its just me liking the vocaloid version too much or if the boys bring it down that much for me but smth abt it man idk #speaking of the guys rip to akito for not getting the yy solo he desperately needed #bro is doomed to only have one good solo til the end of time </3 #like Im happy for an but man I wish all of them got yy solos they all sound soooo good in that cover #also give me shanti solos because I wanna like vbs shanti soooo bad but smth abt it doesnt click in the way I want it to #also delete vbs egoist from the game thanks <3

[munamania]

ok. so she stayed over until like. 6am. and this is so hard because well i do like her sooo much and we hung out for like. 9 hours. and obviously i can be so normal about that but it’s like. i feel like. i know im meant to know her. but dear god why did it have to be in this capacity. im gonna go insane

#like i am grateful to just have her here and to have met her and we just hit it off so insanely #but why does she have to be straight. and i dont want to be one of the bitches that assumed she was queer but like obv i was. #why does she have to have a boring ass bf that i dont even hate but that. truly based on any time ive interacted with them it's been sooo #weird. but she's saying yesterday she's had thoughts of MARRYING him. i mean this is first real relationship for her ig maybe #i used to think abt that too? idk. but like. ugh #it still feels so special to just have this bond this person that so easily like gets me and clicks with me and we just work #and appreciate each other quietly until given the opportunity (like last night) to just say a bunch of shit #how am i supposed to be normal!!!!!!! ugh #like i need to try to move on. at least temporarily. at least in some capacity. but how the fuck am i supposed to do that #when even on a friend level we're like. absurdly close and stuff #she's telling me about when she met her bf and they both sensed smth between them and everyone else did and so it just worked and #whatever. bestie. do you know how many people have asked me um. about you about us #cause we're just so WEIRD!!!! but she's straight. like i can't sit here and disrespect the fact that she's said that outright like twice #yk. what am i supposed to do. #grrrrrrrrrrrrr UGH!!!! like. yk???? i don't WANT to not have her in my life i know the easiest solution would be #stop talking to her. but u dont get it. like we just on some fucking strange level Get each other. we just do #and i dont want to give that up just because i have feelings that she might never be able to reciprocate #even if it would feel right. #film girl saga

[astrxealis]

i really want to play dragon age origins again ngl...

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #i only ever played for a few hours but #last night i saw that uhh MOREIFAN #hi i made this post last night but i wanted to post it in the morning but forgot. i now remembered just now #MORRIGAN !! <3 i saw a gifset of her n i didn't perceive her that much back then but wow she is so pretty #alistair was my fave! he's still cool (i think) but i think i'd like morrigan more now ^___^ but also idk. hmm. #it's on the xbox and i barely use it nowadays bcs Playstation and Mobile ya. i should use the switch more. i miss my gaymes there #i was a human noble iirc. idk what i want to be now if i return to the game bcs i'll likely restart! #i actually played dragon age origins before ffxiv . i remember this fact bcs i played xiv and was like WOA i think #dragon age origins helped prepare me for this kind of gameplay (mostly involving clicking ?? iirc) #ya... also idk if i want to be a human noble anymore bcs ever since xiv yeah. faves are miqo'te and viera and lala yk ^___^ #tbh i like both miqo'tes but mostly just male viera I LOVE FEMALES don't get me wrong but there's smth abt them that is Less now #lalas i general i super love they are such lil cute funny guys. female voice 1 is best btw <3 uhh i prefer females w lalas #so it is a BALANCE ... i lov other races like elezens (they are PRETTY. fuck people who don't like elezens) #and auri. plural of aura. i forgot if there was a space. i think there was. so yeah idk which i prefer w male female (male i think) #but it is a balance yes bcs other friends like em more !! uhh mostly femras. sorry elezens. also i like the other races too okay #but i prefer TWINKS over MOMMIES /lh both are great fr tho #wow... i think if ever i were to fantasia (kinda scared of becoming a fantasia addict lmaoo /lh) i want to be male miqo most #bcs i envy male viera gender sm but ?!?!?!??! male miqo seems most fun to play. but also i'm attached to my fem miqo so. #this turned from dragon age to ffxiv. why is this inevitable. why does this always happen #also this is so far into the tags of this post now and this post has strayed so far so small yeah #WAH. sometimes i get all jhdsghjb ?!?! whenever someone is like omg hi you followed me. omg hi i yeah yeah yeah #admiration/indimitation/wrong spelling ik but my shoulders hurt rn IDC. ookay it is hsdbgj??!??! in a VERY /pos way #but also i'm shy i don't really get it (i mean i could if i analyzed it properly. but i'm shy w this okay) #but also i realize i GET THAT WAY TOO !! sometimes i'm kinda woa w some people and when they follow me back it's like hi............ #this is me w my fav writer following me back. and someone from twt i followed w/o realizing i followed them on their tumblr sb #and other people. and yeah. it's like wah hi..... <3 interesting I CAN'T THINK ANYMORE #time to do homework (or roulettes... or dailies.........) #interesting to think abt how i know the games ik. most of the games like cod and dragon age ik bcs of xbox #and they are blizzard stuff iirc !! but i grew up w square enix and a wii aside from a ps2/3 ?? so that is that

[zemnarihah]

ooooo just got to tell this HUGE asshole at work that he was wrong i am going to be riding this high for a week

#i wish my job didnt require like a thousand layers of explanation to tell ppl abt stuff that happens but basically #someone this guy who is like coworker adjacent but is like at a seperate company that we work with . and would technically outrank me #asked me to do smth and i was like sure but then the system wouldnt let me so i was like oh yeah sorry looks like the system isnt set up to #do that #and he got super pissy and condescending and told me to have my manager show me how. and i even told him i was like i mean i can ask but i #think theyll probably say the same thing. and he was like yeah have them show you bc you can i just had somdone else do it (ya rite..) #so i ask a supervisor.n they spend ten minutes checking to see if like maybe we were wrong bc the guy was so insistent abt it. and then the #were like yeah we cant do that. so this guy waited on hold for over ten minutes for me to come back like. Hi:) yeah so actually I spoke #with a supervisor and looks like we arent able to do that:) sorry about that:) #and the customer we were supposed to be helping together had disconnected bc i had to have them on hold too #and he was like can u transfer the customer to me now and i was like oh so their call disconnected:) sorry about that:) heres their phone #number you can go ahead and call them back:) #which he has to do bc thats his job lmao. what an asshole lol he doesnt even work for my company literally trying to mansplain how shit #works on our system which he definitely has never fucking used bc its specific to my company! #not even to like use mansplain as a buzzword bc i think thats so annoying but i rlly dont think he would have been as rude and condescendin #if i was a guy like i rlly dont. it was actually so condescending he was like telling me 'ok so do you see this button in the bottom left #of the screen? youre going to go ahead and click on that-' like trying to walk me through some shit that he has no clue abt. #anyway. hope the customer yelled at him for keeping them waiting. i doubt it but that would be some good karma since it actually was #his fault