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roonilwazlibimagines · 9 months

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all too well - c.d x female reader

Blurb: literally just all too well by taylor swift; young reader x older cedric Word Count: 14.7k Warnings: cedric's an ass, i did a lot of editing but i haven't looked at this in like a year A/N: what if i told you i started this the week after red (tv) release #oopsies #iwasnevergoingtoproofreadthisagainsoifiguredishouldjustpostit #ihaveinspiraitontowrite #howdowefeelaboutfratboyregulus #howdowefeelaboutmeselfprojecting

Masterlist

An Upstate Escape

It was my first year of Hogwarts when I first saw Cedric Diggory and, even if I didn’t necessarily believe it, the first thought that came to my mind was that one day he would be mine. It was a far stretch because while I was in my first year he was in his last and ready to graduate from Hogwarts. But it didn’t matter because really, it was just a silly schoolgirl crush.

Cedric Diggory was the golden boy. Quite literally. He had all the best attributes of a great Hufflepuff: he was Head Boy and captain of Hufflepuff’s Quidditch team, he was top of his year academically, and while he managed to accomplish all of that, he competed in the Triwizard Tournament and won.

This reputation definitely didn’t help my crush. It only made me want him more. Subconsciously, I think it made me feel that if I ever was to have a chance with him I needed to be just as golden as him. So I became the golden girl. I was top of my class academically, I was head girl and I already had a job as a junior healer lined up for me after Hogwarts. Cedric had his own reputation and now I had mine. It crossed my mind, one random afternoon during my last few days of Hogwarts that I finally felt like I was on the same level as Cedric Diggory.

Not that I had seen him since my last day of my first year. But I was still aware that he was golden. He was a famous Quidditch player which was one of the few things I lacked in comparison to him. Quidditch was never my strong suit, but I was happy to watch the game and I knew I would turn back into my first year old self if I ever got to see him play again.

He seemed untouchable now, with his elite status, but for some reason, I just knew that someday our paths would cross again.

And they did. The week after I had finished Hogwarts. I was out celebrating with my friends at a pub in Diagon Alley and even in the dark light I could recognise the familiar golden brown curls at the bar and I suddenly decided that I was thirsty. Offering to buy the next round I made my way up to the bar, pulling my skirt down and fixing my hair as I did so. I stood right next to him and leant over the bench so the bartender could hear me, forcing myself not to look at him.

I could feel his eyes on me and it gave me a confidence boost that I didn’t need. When I finished my order I stood back up straight, pretending to let my eyes search the room before landing on the man beside me.

“Hi,” he smirked, angling his body to face me. He was sitting on a stool and I had to look up at him.

“Hi,” I responded, smiling up at him and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, “Cedric Diggory, right?” The words escaped my mouth before I could think them through. Great. He was probably going to think I was some crazy fan who stalked him.

“You’re a fan?” Of course. He cocked an eyebrow at me as he took a sip of his drink and I chuckled.

“Sort of.” I was already slightly tipsy and feeling a bit too confident as I continued, “I was in my first year of Hogwarts when you graduated.” He nodded slowly and I wondered if he was doing the maths in his head.

“And you’ve been keeping up with me ever since?” There was a teasing glint in his eye as he went back to smirking and I laughed again.

“Something like that,” I mumbled, just as my drinks were placed in front of me. Both of our eyes fell on them and when I went to grab them he spoke again.

“So, you know who I am, tell me,” he paused, “what’s your name, pretty girl?” I almost dropped the drinks at his words and I think he noticed because he let out a low chuckle that was hard to hear with the music playing so loud.

When I told him my name he repeated it as if he was testing it out in his mouth and he smiled as if he enjoyed the new taste. I smiled up at him, suddenly unsure what was going to happen next and fearing that this would be the last time I spoke to Cedric Diggory.

“Well,” he thankfully continued, repeating my name once more, “I usually come here after Quidditch practice so maybe I’ll see you around?” He repeated his actions; lifting an eyebrow at me and sipping whatever was in his drink.

Smirking, I replied, “maybe you will,” and I walked away, my heart pounding as I tried to hide the grin on my face.

I didn’t want to be distracted by Cedric Diggory the whole night so I made a conscious effort not to look back at the bar, but it was torture. When we finished our round of drinks I allowed myself to glance back over to the bar and even if I wanted to turn away the second I saw Cedric Diggory already looking at me I forced myself to keep eye contact and gave him a flirty smile.

He seemed to like it because he smiled back and winked at me before downing his drink. I turned back around and let myself enjoy the way my heart fluttered.

~~~

The morning after I realised that I was in a trap. Firstly I wasn’t sure when Cedric had Quidditch practice, but that was an easy fix, surely one of my friends who were into Quidditch would know. The second issue was what did I do once I found out? Did I go there after his next Quidditch practice or would that seem too desperate? But if I didn’t go straight away and waited then I ran the risk of him finding someone else to flirt with. Then, of course, the self doubt crept in and for a few seconds I wondered if he even meant that he wanted to see me again. He was a famous Quidditch player. Surely he could have any girl he wanted.

I didn’t like chasing, there was too much thinking involved. But then I just had to remember how golden he still looked with his hair done perfectly and his eyes still gleaming and his confident demeanour and suddenly, I decided not to think too hard about it and went to find out when their next practice was.

The Quidditch season was ending soon meaning his team was practising religiously to ensure they had a prime opportunity to make it to the finals. I pretended to be interested when my friend told me all this hoping that when it would, undoubtedly, be brought up in conversation with Cedric I wouldn’t look like a complete fool. They figured out I was asking this for help with a boy but I didn’t tell them who it was. Not that I was embarrassed by Cedric or my crush on him, but I didn’t want to look like an idiot if nothing came out of it.

They trained Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays according to my friend and so I decided that Friday would be the best night to go. It was about a week since I first saw him so it didn’t look like I had rushed to find him and going out on a Friday night out was normal so it wouldn’t seem like I showed up just for him.

~~~

I realised I got there probably a bit too early because there was barely anyone in there. It was dark and the music was just starting to get louder. I sat myself on one of the stools at the bar, hoping that he would eventually show. I got a drink to calm my nerves and hopefully give me some confidence and I sipped it slowly so it wouldn’t immediately go to my head.

As I ordered a second drink I heard someone call my name and my head immediately snapped to find someone taking the seat next to me.

“Cedric,” I smiled, noticing that there were a few more people now in the pub.

“I’m glad you made it,” he smiled and I decided to act coy.

“Me too, did you have practice today?” I queried, thanking the bartender as I started sipping my new drink.

“I did, it was bloody horrendous today,” he mumbled before ordering a drink for himself.

“You must be training to get into the finals,” I commented, feeling proud of myself for relaying the information I had learnt last week.

“Yeah,” he sighed, his hands resting on his thighs, “we are. Are you a Quidditch fan?” I tensed up not exactly knowing what my next move should be. I wasn’t, but would he lose interest in me if I told him that?

“Of the sorts.” I went with, but immediately regretted it when I realised it made me sound lame. No one says that. He only nodded before taking a sip of his drink.

“So, tell me, what do you do?” I subconsciously sat up a bit straighter, proud to tell anyone my current occupation.

“I’m just starting as a junior healer at St. Mungo’s.” He gave me a surprised look and replied, “impressive.” I hoped it was. Surely a soon to be healer was on a similar level as a professional Quidditch player, right?

We spent the rest of the night talking and getting to know each other. He even gave me his personal insight into some of the tasks he had to do at the Triwizard Tournament and the whole night I was hanging onto each and every word that left his mouth. I was in awe of the man who really lived up to his reputation and was nothing short of golden and I was happy to hear all about him.

When it started getting late and the music seemed to die down I started to fear what would happen next.

“It has been lovely talking to you,” he said before finishing the drink in his hand, “I would love to keep this conversation going but maybe next time we could talk over dinner instead of drinks?” It took everything I had not to start squealing and shouting ‘yes!’. I instead cleared my throat to give me some time to relax before replying, “that sounds great.”

~~~

So the next week we were at a new restaurant outside Diagon Alley and Cedric was telling me about his training routine for his upcoming Quidditch game next week. It was a restaurant I had never heard of and there was barely anyone inside at this late hour, but I wondered if the few people in there could tell that I was completely enamoured by him and the way he spoke.

That night, despite the small crowd, I got a message from my friend alerting me of the ‘breaking news’ that Cedric Diggory had been spotted with a girl and could potentially be off the market.

‘Remember when you used to have a crush on him?’

For some reason I felt like I wasn’t meant to tell her that the mystery girl was me. Had Cedric told anyone? We had organised another dinner, this time at his house and I wondered if these locations had been specifically chosen to prevent the media from finding out more.

‘Worst news of my life’ I responded, hoping the conversation would end there.

After a few more dinners - which were never explicitly called ‘dates’, but I was confident were - Cedric said, “I really like talking to you.”

We were in another empty restaurant outside Diagon Alley and I beamed at him.

“I really like talking to you,” I giggled and he let out a breathy chuckle.

“You know,” he paused, “I’ve never met anyone like you.” My heart was pounding as I hung on his every word. “It feels like I’ve known you forever, you’re so mature for your age.” I wasn’t sure what to say but I thought it was a nice compliment so I looked down, hoping it came off as bashful. “Do you maybe want to come watch my game this weekend?”

He said I could bring a few of my friends and I, of course, accepted. I couldn’t remember if I had any plans that weekend, but I was more than happy to cancel them because going to the game would mean that people would see me.

The media knew that Cedric was seeing the same girl a couple of nights each week, but they didn’t know who the girl was, but going to his Quidditch game would make it official.

I hadn’t spoken about this with Cedric because I was scared he was going to think I was using him for fame or money or whatever it was, but it was obvious he wanted the same thing and had never been happier.

~~~

“Cedric Diggory?” One of my friends asked as I told them about how I had seen him that night we went out and how we had been meeting up since meaning I was the girl in that article.

“Yeah,” I said, “he was in his last year when we started, he is a professional Quidditch player?” I asked, dumbfounded that they were asking about him as if they didn’t know him.

“I know who he is,” they rolled their eyes at me, “he’s just kinda old.” They shrugged and I felt hot at the comment. I wanted to ask what the big deal was. We both enjoyed hanging out with each other, we were both adults. There was nothing wrong. But before I could speak another one of my friends chimed in.

“So are you like,” they paused, “dating?” We hadn’t said. The answer was therefore no, but I felt foolish telling them that. They were making this out to be a much bigger deal than it originally was and I was sad because I was no longer excited about asking them to the game.

“Well, we haven’t said we are officially dating,” I spoke slowly, “but surely he doesn’t ask every girl he meets to come to his Quidditch games, right?” They shrugged in response and I wished that, whether they believed it or not, they would have agreed with me.

~~~

I had bought his team's scarf and had my hair tied up in a scrunchie with his team's colours and we were sitting at the top of the stadium where Cedric had bought our tickets. I cheered for him when he came out and I cheered for him when he caught the snitch and they won the game. I was feeling giddy for him and for some reason I had never felt so nervous when I waited for him to come out of the locker rooms.

“Congratulations,” I smiled when he came out, his teammates trailing behind him.

“You stayed back.” One of his teammates nudged him in the side before chuckling and walking away but my focus was entirely on him.

“Of course,” I chuckled, bouncing on my heels.

“Thanks,” he mumbled and brought me in for a hug, pressing the faintest kiss to the top of my head. I felt his chest rise and fall and I wondered if he was exhausted after a long match.

“Listen,” he started, “we’re going out to celebrate tonight, but maybe tomorrow we can go out and do our own celebrating?” He pulled back and rose his eyebrow suggestively at me.

“Sounds good,” I whispered and feeling bold I leant in and pressed a kiss to his cheek, “see you then.” I started walking past him, heading over to my friends who had given us our space.

I heard one of his friends laugh and ask, “was that your girlfriend, Ced?” but I was too far away to hear his reply. I wondered if he would make it official tomorrow night.

He would have to, right? We had been to dinner countless times and he had kissed me in front of his teammates. Well maybe it wasn’t a proper kiss, but it was something. He asked me to his game and he still wanted to see me afterwards so surely I wasn’t naive to think that he would ask me to be his girlfriend, right?

Well maybe I was naive enough to think that he would, because he didn’t.

We were back at his house and he was talking so quickly I could barely keep up, but I didn’t want him to think I was uninterested so I kept an interested look on my face.

“And then I was sure that I was going to be hit by the bludger, but as you saw I moved away just in time, but then I wasn’t sure where the snitch went and I was sure the other seeker was just about to grab it, but-” I reacted at all of the right places, but for some reason my heart was in my throat.

I knew we had only been talking for a short while, but I had feelings for Cedric Diggory and I wasn’t sure what I was going to do with myself if he didn’t reciprocate them.

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I barely noticed when he stopped talking, until he took a bite of his food and pointed at me before saying, “That’s cute.”

He was referring to his team's scarf that I had foolishly worn to dinner. I wasn’t sure why I wore it again. I had bought it just for the match and if I was being honest it was out of my budget. Apparently Quidditch merchandise is not in a financially struggling junior healer in training’s price range. I guess I just didn’t want it to be a waste of money.

“Thanks,” I looked down at my food, “I’ve had it for ages.” I mumbled, not really wanting him to know that I bought it just for the match.

He kept telling me stories about the team, what they got up to last night celebrating and when his next match would be.

“It’s nice, just to be in private, don’t you think?” he asked after finishing a story about his friend who got so drunk that night he spliced himself.

“You must get a lot of unwanted attention in public.” I took a sip of the water and he leant back on the bench across from me. I was weary of this conversation. Nothing had come from the media about me being at his game. Apparently they didn’t stay for the players to come out at the end of the game, so Cedric Diggory was still taken by some mystery girl.

I wasn’t sure why I was so caught up on this, I guess a part of me wanted to be public so it would feel real.

“Yeah, it gets hard sometimes,” he sighed, “you think you’re living a normal life but then it’s on the front page of the newspaper and suddenly everyone has an opinion.”

I guess it made sense. He obviously wanted to take things slow because of this privacy issue, but I was certain that one day we would take the next step.

And I was feeling pretty confident about it too when I was standing in his doorway, ready to apparate back home when he called out my name and grabbed onto my waist, bringing me closer to him and pressing his lips against mine. I smiled into the kiss and brought my hands onto his chest to steady myself from the sudden movement. He pulled away and I knew I was smiling like an idiot.

“See you next week?” he asked, and I beamed.

“Of course.”

When I got home I realised that I had left my scarf at his house but that was the least of my concerns because all I could focus on was the feeling of him on my lips and the excitement of a new relationship beginning and all I could do was close my eyes and focus on my breathing so I didn’t pass out.

The First Crack in The Glass

Cedric and I had been going out for over a month now and we were settling into our relationship. If that’s what we were calling it. I was unsure because we had never spoken about it explicitly. It did frustrate me, but I was so happy to be with him and I didn’t want to push him in a direction he didn’t want to go in, so I tried not to think about it.

I hoped that he would extend that favour to me as well. Cedric had invited me to one of the training sessions and it was here where the media finally got the winning shot of Cedric walking over to me sitting in the stands. It didn’t take long before people found out it was me and even though Cedric hadn’t brought it up, I wondered if he was as happy as I was that our love was there for the world to see.

Since our relationship had received a bit of attention from the media, we now had most of our dates at his house. Now that people knew we were together, media outlets seemed to be following our every move and it was frustrating having to use back exits and going out in inconspicuous clothing. I didn’t think Cedric really liked all the attention our relationship was getting. He would always get quiet when there were people waiting outside to take our photos and I would always find papers with our photo on them torn up in his bin.

Which I was noticing a lot more now that we were spending more time at his house.

But I wasn’t complaining about it because it gave us plenty of opportunities to make out.

Cedric’s lips were soft and his touch was sure. Sometimes it made me feel a bit insecure because he obviously had experience whereas I had only had a few pathetic ‘pecks’ during school.

But I had other things to worry about. Sometimes Cedric would get a bit handsy and I’d have to awkwardly make an excuse and remove myself from the situation. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy his touch, he was obviously skilled and I enjoyed it thoroughly, but I just wasn’t ready to take it to the next step.

I hadn’t done anything like that with another person and while it had crossed my mind that I wouldn’t mind doing it with Cedric, I just wasn’t ready to give that up when I wasn’t even sure if we were officially dating.

Tonight I was meeting his friends for the first time. They mainly consisted of the people he played Quidditch with as well as a few others who were in his year at Hogwarts. It was a celebration for his team who had made it to the finals and even though I still needed it explicitly said, the fact that he had chosen me to accompany him made me feel like we were official.

“You look divine,” Cedric murmured, making his way over to me and placing his hands on my hips. He brought his head down to mine and he pressed a kiss to the outside of my ear making me giggle.

“Thanks,” I mumbled, “I’m not going to lie, I’m a little nervous.” He pulled away from me. We were outside his doorway, my arms were wrapped around my chest in the cool night air and I was glad that his porch light was dim because I could barely see his face and I hoped it was the same for him.

“Why?” His eyebrow furrowed in confusion and put a hand on my upper arm.

“I don’t know,” I murmured, trying not to meet his gaze, “it’s just nerve wracking meeting new people.” He didn’t respond and so I continued. “I really want to make a good impression on your friends, you know? They’re obviously important to you and I don’t want them to hate me.” “Why would they hate you?” I wasn’t entirely sure. For a moment I reflected on it. They were the same age as Cedric. I had just left school. I didn’t think that we would have much in common and I guess a part of me understood how people perceived my relationship with Cedric in regards to our age gap. I didn’t want to tell him this though.

“I don’t know,” I mumbled and he brought a hand under my chin so I would look up at him.

“Hey,” his voice was just above a whisper, “there’s a reason I’m bringing you tonight, don’t doubt yourself, okay?” He brought his head closer to mine and placed a kiss on my forehead and I felt my heart flutter. Obviously he liked me enough if there was a reason he was bringing me tonight.

My fears were unfortunately confirmed at the party. Cedric had kindly introduced me to all of his friends and I was holding on, probably a little too tightly, to his arm. We were at someone's house and it was loud and dark and I could smell the alcohol and some other foul odour that I had a suspicion was drugs.

“She just finished Hogwarts, but she’s already a junior healer.” He sounded so proud that I didn’t have the heart to tell him that technically I wasn’t a junior healer yet. And all of his friends sounded impressed and I liked that.

However, once he had introduced me to everyone, he got called over by one of his teammates and turning to me he quickly mumbled a, “I’ll be right back,” and left me by myself.

I went to go over to his friends from Hogwarts, surely we would have some common ground because we went to the same school. We did. Kind of. Most of the teachers they had had either retired or left by the time I had started and I was getting lost in their stories. Not that it was their fault. They welcomed me in and they included me in conversation, but there was so much history between them and I didn’t have enough time to catch up.

I excused myself and went to the bathroom, hoping that along the way I would find Cedric and he would rescue me.

I found him on my way to the bathroom and changed trajectory so I was walking over to him. He was sitting in a lounge and there was a small space next to him.

“Hey.” He sat up as I made my way over and I squished myself onto the empty space next to him. I brought my hands around his arm once more and he smiled down at me before going back to the conversation with his teammates. They didn’t include me as much as his friends from Hogwarts did and when he was talking he was using so many hand actions that my hands got shaken away from his and they were now resting awkwardly in my lap.

He was facing away from me and I was glad because I didn’t want him to see me overreacting about this.

“I need to go to the bathroom,” I mumbled and it made me even sadder when Cedric didn’t even acknowledge me leaving.

I was slightly panicked when I realised I didn’t even know where the bathroom was, but I was even more terrified when I found it and realised that I could potentially walk in on anything. I locked the door behind me and I looked at myself in the mirror and frowned. I didn’t even know why I was so upset.

I put it down to just being overwhelmed. I was in a new environment with new people who I wanted to impress so I could impress my boyfriend, who wasn’t actually welcoming me into his friend group, who also isn’t actually my boyfriend, and who probably wants to have sex with me even though I’m not ready yet.

So maybe I did know why I was so upset.

I focused on my breathing and splashed some cold water on my face before opening the door and going out to face round two.

I didn’t get very far because as I left I bumped into Ginny Weasley. She apologised and I apologised and when we both regained our composure she smiled brightly at me.

“Hey, your Cedric’s girlfriend, yeah?” I was so shocked about running into someone and being known as Cedric’s girlfriend that I immediately replied with a, ‘yes.’

“You went to Hogwarts, right? I think you were a few years below me?” I was shocked that she remembered and had to swallow before I answered.

“Yeah I did, we were a couple years apart.” She was so famous in the Quidditch world that even I knew who she was. “Congratulations on your team getting through.” She didn’t play on the same team as Cedric but Cedric had told me that her team had gone through as well. I guess they were here also celebrating.

“Thank you,” she beamed, “so excited to be able to play in the finals.” After that I excused myself and told her that I had to find Cedric, but really all I wanted was to go home.

I kept replaying the conversation with Ginny as I made my way back to Cedric. I wasn’t entirely sure where he was because I wasn’t even sure how I found the bathroom.

People were shouting and bumping into me but all I could do was dig my nails into my hand as I recalled how I had foolishly said I was Cedric’s girlfriend.

But then I heard Cedric’s laugh and when I saw him his head had fallen back and he had a hand on his abdomen and I smiled.

I was definitely overreacting.

I went back to the seat beside Cedric, but he barely acknowledged my return. I decided that if I wasn’t going to be explicitly included in the conversation then I was still going to support Cedric. So I sat there and looked pretty and laughed at the right times and listened to every single word that they said so next time I would be able to join in.

Halfway through a conversation Cedric excused himself to go to the bathroom and I felt my breath get caught in my throat when I realised I would be left alone with his friends.

“So, has Cedric gone soft?” One of them asked me as soon as Cedric was out of ear shot. I was so shocked at being addressed that I stared at them with my mouth open for a second before I let out a laugh.

“I don’t want to embarrass him.” They all laughed at that.

“You don’t have to,” one of them said.

“We can do that.” I found myself laughing as well. Maybe this wasn’t too bad.

They kept telling me embarrassing stories about Cedric and when he came back he had a look of confusion seeing us all laughing together.

“What are you guys talking about?” he asked, laughing awkwardly, obviously feeling left out of our laughter.

“We were just reliving that time you fell of your broom when that reporter came and-”

“Don’t remind me,” he winced and for the first time that night I felt relaxed.

With Cedric back the conversation returned to one which I was no longer a part of and part of me was sad that we were no longer bonding. But before I knew it the party was over and Cedric was apparating us back to his place.

I hadn’t stayed the night at his place, yet, but I was feeling giddy after the party and was hoping that he would offer tonight.

“Did you talk to Ginny Weasley tonight?” he queried. His back was towards me but I could tell that the bubbly persona he had had with his friends was suddenly gone.

“What?” I was so shocked about the sudden change in his demeanour that that was all I could get out. “Yeah I did,” I corrected myself, my eyebrows furrowing in confusion and my arms instinctively wrapping across my chest. “Why?” We were in the kitchen, he was facing the bench and I was facing his back.

“Did you tell her we were boyfriend and girlfriend?” He finally turned around to raise an eyebrow at me accusingly and I was left standing at him dumbfounded.

“What?” This time my voice was shrill and I almost let out a chuckle at the ridiculous question.

“She came up to me and said something about how cute my girlfriend was and I was just wondering if you were telling people that we were dating?” I was so dumbstruck that all I could do was blink at him.

“So we aren’t dating?” I squinted my eyes at him, my mouth still hanging open in shock.

“Well, no,” he mumbled and I finally let out a laugh. I felt so foolish. I wanted to cry.

“So why’d you bring me out tonight then?” I gave him an incredulous look and he rolled his eyes which only made me even angrier.

“Don’t do that,” he grunted, turning away from me again.

“Do what?” I took a step closer to him.

“Get all upset and emotional about it,” he winced as if me showing any emotion disgusted him.

“About the fact that we act like a couple but you won’t make it official?”

“Look,” he paused, bringing his hands out in front of him, his palms facing me, “I don’t want to fight with you about this.”

“Well what are we, Cedric?” I was practically shouting now but I didn’t care. “You can’t expect me to go on like this if you won’t put a label on us.”

“We were doing fine before all of this, why do we need to complicate things?” I just stared at him. My mouth slightly agape, wondering if maybe I really was complicating things. I hadn’t really had a boyfriend before, is this what it was like?

“Cedric,” I begged, “we go out all the time, we make out on your couch almost every night, you invite me to your parties but then ignore me the whole night, and then when I-”

“Hang on,” he interrupted, “ignore you?” He finally turned to me and I shrunk under his intense gaze. I had seen Cedric angry before. When paparazzi followed us out of a restaurant, when he didn’t catch the snitch or lost a game. But that was an angry quiet. His jaw would visibly tense and his fingers would turn white as he dug his nails into his palm and he wouldn’t say anything to me until he had calmed down, which sometimes took days. No matter how much I tried to speak to him, he remained quiet. I was used to it. But this? I was not.

“Well, yeah,” I mumbled, suddenly not as confident as I was only seconds ago.

“Explain,” he challenged.

“You introduced me to your friends but then you left me by myself and I have nothing in common with them and then when I do go find you you ignored me the whole time and-”

“I was just talking to my friends!” he exclaimed, “is that such a fucking crime?” I think it was the first time I had heard him swear and I wished that I had never brought this up.

“It’s not, but I just, I wasn’t included in the conversation and I just felt-”

“You were in the conversation, you were laughing and they were telling you stories about me, I don’t know what the fuck you’re going on about.” I felt my bottom lip tremble, not used to being on the receiving end of such harsh words. But I took a deep breath and swallowed before continuing.

“Okay, fine, whatever,” I didn’t want to fight, I had a feeling he’d win, “but I need to know where I stand with you.” My voice was weak and he brought his hands up to run a hand through his hair before he continued.

“I don’t know,” he sounded frustrated, “I guess all my previous relationships have been physical and-”

He continued but I didn’t process a single word he said after that. Of course he wanted to be physical. Intimacy was such an important part of a relationship and I had been depriving him of that.

“I haven’t done anything before,” I spoke slowly, playing with my hands in front of my abdomen. He let out a sigh and came closer to me, grabbing my fidgeting hands in his own.

“Well don’t feel pressured to do anything, but I just think it would maybe help us become more real, you know?” I didn’t know because I had never done it. When I didn’t respond he just continued. “Look, let’s just call it a night, you can think about it and you can stay over here.” He leaned over to press a kiss to the top of my head. “I’m sorry for yelling.”

I just let him hold me close to him, my body limp as he put a hand on the curve of my spin and led me to his bedroom where he let me borrow some of his clothes.

I didn’t really want to spend the night with him anymore but it was what I wanted mere minutes ago and I couldn’t be bothered to fight it.

I thought the first time I would sleep in the same bed with him I would have the best sleep of my life. I would feel comfortable and safe. He’d have an arm around my waist and we’d either be facing each other and watching the other until the first person fell asleep, or my back would be towards him and I’d feel him breath in and out. It was neither of those things.

I was on my back, staring at the ceiling unable to fall asleep. It was a big thing to be willing to give up a part of myself for Cedric. I kept tossing and turning, hoping that sleep would find me, but it never did.

All I wanted was to get some peace and so I decided that I was willing to give that part of myself up and suddenly I was able to fall asleep.

~~~

“I’m ready,” I had told him as I sat across from him at breakfast.

“You’re ready?” He raised an eyebrow at me and I nodded.

“To you know,” I paused, “have sex.” I hated how weak my voice got as I said those last two words.

“Excellent,” he beamed, sitting up a bit straighter.

“But, do you think maybe we could take it slow?” I asked, “I kinda want my first time to be special.” It sounded silly, I knew that. But it was a lot of him to ask that I give this up for him and I was hoping that he would be able to do this one thing for me.

He let out a laugh and I wasn’t sure if I should have been offended or not.

“It’s not a big deal,” he said with his breakfast in his mouth, “your first time,” he added, “don’t put too much pressure on it.”

I wanted to tell him that to me, my first time was important, but I was scared it would turn into a fight like last night so I let it go.

I was a nervous wreck ever since that conversation. I wasn’t sure how to dress, I didn’t know what underwear and bra to wear. Did I eat beforehand? Surely I wasn’t meant to have a full bladder. I had all of these questions and really no one to ask. I wanted to ask my friends but they were still unsure about my relationship with Cedric and I wanted to ask Cedric but I feared he would think I was stupid and I wanted to prove to him that I was ready and mature enough to do this, so I figured it out myself.

It didn’t really matter what I wore because it was off me within seconds. Cedric made a comment that my lingerie was cute, but then he took it off so that didn’t really matter either. It didn’t matter that I went in with an empty stomach either because by the end of it I had lost my appetite. But my mouth was dry and I desperately needed a drink of water. Cedric offered to get me one when I was lying naked on top of his bed sheets.

My bottom lip was trembling and my chest was heaving but I knew I couldn’t cry. Cedric took it slow but it was all so quick it felt like it was over within minutes.

I was on my back the whole time, my hands briefly going out to touch Cedric’s shoulders as he leaned over me to grunt in my ear.

Maybe I was naive to think that my first time would be romantic and special and about my pleasure, maybe that just wasn’t how sex worked. Cedric obviously had a lot more experience than me and so he would know better.

But still, I just felt like there was a piece of me missing. And I knew it was stupid because I knew that virginity was just a social construct, but I had a feeling I was no longer the same person I was this morning when I woke up.

“Here you go, baby,” Cedric hummed, passing me my glass of water as I sat up and started sipping it. He got back on the bed and I placed my glass on a tissue on his bedside table.

“Thanks,” I mumbled, copying his actions and lying back down. I brought the bed sheet up to my neck.

“That was amazing,” he seemed dazed and I noticed it was the first time I had seen his hair in a mess. I figured that if he looked like he had reached euphoria then I should as well and so I agreed with him. “Was it good enough for your first time?” He gave me a lazy smirk as he came closer to me and held my body close to his.

“Yeah,” my voice came out shaky and he only chuckled in response.

“Good,” he hummed, “only the best for my girlfriend.” His arms snaked around my waist as he brought me closer to him. I laid there, still. I couldn’t move. There were too many emotions that I had never felt before and all I wanted was to have a shower, get dressed and go home. But I let him hold me close to him because at least now we were officially boyfriend and girlfriend.

Are You Real?

We had been seeing each other for just over two months and we were officially a couple now. After that night things did get better. Cedric was inviting me to stay overnight at his house often and he was starting to introduce me to his friends as his girlfriend.

The biggest shock for me was when he asked me to meet his family. I thought that was pretty serious and so I happily said yes.

I was nervous again, about meeting new people, but I didn’t want to accidentally make him angry by reminding him of the last time I was nervous about meeting people close to him.

“Don’t be so nervous,” he had chastised anyway. We were standing in front of his parents' door and I wasn’t sure if I was shivering from the nerves or the cold.

“I’m not,” I had whined, my eyebrows furrowing together as I defended myself.

“You are,” he chuckled, pulling me closer to him and wrapping my coat tighter around my body, “don’t be.” He pressed a kiss to the top of my head and we were walking into his childhood house.

“Cedric!” His father had cried out, hurrying over to give him a hug. I stood a little awkwardly behind him until his mother came up.

“And you must be his new girlfriend,” I introduced myself and she brought me in for a hug.

They were leading us into the living room and I couldn’t help but look at everything we passed as I took in his house. It was big. Bigger than any house I had ever lived in and probably even bigger than the house Cedric currently lived in.

I followed Cedric in and sat down next to him in the lounge in the living room and his dad sat in front of us. His mother went to go get us drinks while Cedric and his father caught up.

I held onto his arm, smiling the whole time and laughing at the appropriate times, fearing the moment the attention would be brought upon myself.

“So, tell me, how did you two meet?” His mother sat next to her husband and I opened my mouth to talk.

“We met in Diagon Alley,” Cedric beat me to it and I went back to smiling at them.

“Oh, that’s so sweet,” she replied, “and what do you do?” She turned to address me and I went to tell her about how excited I was to start as a junior healer.

“She’s starting as a junior healer soon,” Cedric had answered for me.

“Wow,” they both exclaimed, “that’s impressive.”

“It is,” Cedric replied, placing a hand on my knee, “it’s no surprise though, she was top of her class and head girl,” he paused, “my perfect girl.” I stared at him a bit dumbfounded, blinking rapidly, trying to figure out what to say next. We had expressed ways we admired the other, but these were some of the most heartfelt words I had ever heard Cedric say about me.

“You’re too kind,” I mumbled as his parents watched our interaction. He beamed down at me and I gave him a nervous smile.

“We’ve never seen Cedric so infatuated with someone before,” his dad teased and I could hear his mum coo. Cedric chuckled.

“Please, I don’t need you guys embarrassing me.” He let his head fall for a moment and I laughed.

“He does that enough himself.” I looked over at him and we shared another smile.

When we eventually made our way over to the dinner table I passed a photo frame of a young Cedric, he would have only been around five or six, with a broom in his hand. It was much bigger than him and in the other he had a fake golden snitch in his hand. His teeth were crooked and his eyes were crinkled from his beaming smile. I couldn’t help but stop and smile as I looked up at it.

“We always knew he would be a Quidditch star,” his mum said. I turned around and smiled at her and continued walking to the dining room.

“Mum,” Cedric complained.

“Well we did, I’m sure you were riding a broom before you could walk properly.” I laughed as I sat down at the table.

“Well, he wasn’t always good,” his dad chimed in and Cedric groaned. “There was the time you flew into our fence.”

“Oh,” his mum laughed, “and the time you lost control and broke the door.”

“I was a child.” Cedric tried to defend himself but he could barely be heard over the laughter.

He was smiling, nonetheless and as I turned over to look at him I was sure that I could see the same smile as the little boy in the photo frame. Still bright, eyes still wrinkled, but maybe straighter teeth.

And he was mine.

I wasn't sure what it was, but I suddenly felt silly about how infatuated I was with him before all of this. Maybe he was just as golden as I had always pictured him to be, but he was still human and somehow, that made me love him even more.

I had already planned that Cedric would have to meet my parents after he so graciously let me meet his and I hoped that it would go just as smoothly as it had with Cedric’s. His parents were so kind and welcoming and there was never an awkward silence which I really appreciated.

He didn’t appear nervous at all and I feared I was carrying it for both of us, but his calm disposition made me feel better.

I had a feeling it could be a little more rocky compared to meeting his because of the letter my parents had sent me when I asked them if I could bring him over. Even though I hadn’t really considered it, apparently our age gap was a bit of an issue for them and they had outlined how concerned they were for me in this relationship. I assured them that Cedric was nothing short of a gentleman and promised them that when they met him they would change their mind immediately.

I didn’t want to tell Cedric this because, really, we hadn’t had the age gap conversation and part of me was scared that if we had it he would doubt himself and call this whole thing off.

They gave me a hug when I entered and Cedric walked in and gave my dad a handshake and my mum a hug and I watched anxiously.

“And you must be Cedric,” my mum said, looking him up and down. They were both smiling but there was an awkward tension in the air which didn’t seem to bother Cedric.

“The one and only,” he joked and I eased up when I remembered how comfortable Cedric was in front of new people.

We were ushered in and found ourselves in a similar position to the one at Cedric’s house except this time, the heat - thankfully - wasn’t on myself.

“You have a lovely house,” he had commented as we walked through and I gave his hand a squeeze.

“Oh,” my parents seemed surprised, “thank you.”

“So, you’re a Quidditch star?” My dad asked when we were finally sitting down.

“Not a star,” he looked bashful and I thought it was cute, “just someone who plays sport.”

“Well you’re very good at it.” It looked like it pained my father to admit it, but Cedric kept his confident demeanour.

“Thank you,” he smiled sheepishly, “I’ve been playing ever since I can remember. Are you a big fan of Quidditch?” I was holding onto Cedric’s arm, looking between him and my dad as they conversed.

“Yeah,” my dad nodded, “but not of your team.”

“Dad.” I gave him a warning look, but he shrugged. Cedric just laughed.

“Hey,” Cedric turned to me, “a man's team is important.” I shook my head but when my father told him his team he continued. “I could get you tickets to their next game if you want?” He perked up at that and soon they were planning to go to a game together.

It seemed my dad had warmed up to Cedric and even though I was a bit weary he would give him a hard time, I was glad they had found common ground. My mum, on the other hand, still had a tight lipped smile as she studied Cedric.

“Well I better start dinner.” She stood up but before she could leave Cedric chimed in.

“Can I help you at all?” She paused and slowly turned around, her head slightly turned to the side.

“No thank you, Cedric,” she paused, “you’re our guest. She gave him a genuine smile and I let out a sigh of relief. They were both warming up to him and that was all I ever wanted.

When we finally made our way over to the dining room, Cedric pulled my chair out for me and I saw my parents share a look as my whole body suddenly turned warm.

Cedric kept the conversation going all night, telling stories about his games and asking my parents questions about themselves and about me, which I was very embarrassed about, but was glad they were getting along.

I was completely enamoured by how confident he was. If I didn’t know any better, you could tell me that he had known my parents his whole life and I would have believed you. He knew just how to charm them and somehow, I was falling even more in love with him.

I stayed back when Cedric left to spend some time with my family and once he did so my parents let out a sigh.

“He seems nice,” my mum commented.

“He’s a nice guy,” my dad said at the same time. I hummed in content. He definitely was.

I never really understood what people meant when they said their relationship was in the ‘honeymoon phase’. Wasn’t your whole relationship meant to feel like a honeymoon? I thought Cedric’s and I would. We had met the other’s family, and both times were successful. We had finally been intimate together, and I was starting to get used to it. He introduced me as his girlfriend all the time and when he wasn't busy training for the finals, we were spending every second we could together.

He had confided in me about his past relationships as well. Girls who were just in it for the fame and the money and I was glad I never brought up how stressed I was about our secretive relationship when we first started dating.

“But you’re different,” he said, “I can picture a future with you.”

I think I finally understood what the phrase picture perfect meant. Everything between Cedric and I was going so well, we just fit together so well. Everything was falling into place and I was convinced we were matching puzzle pieces.

We still hadn’t said ‘I love you’ to the other, but I knew the feelings were there for me and I was sure the feelings were there for him.

But it all started to go downhill on a random Tuesday night.

When I went over Cedric was in a bit of a mood. It was one of his quiet angry moods. I didn’t like when he was in them, but it wasn’t something new to me. I tried to be as pleasing as I could so as not to disturb him anymore.

“How was your day?” He only grunted in response, sitting at the coffee table with a hot mug of tea in his hand. I went over to the kitchen to make myself one.

“What’s wrong?” I tried to keep my voice light but I mustn’t have done a good job at it.

“Nothing,” he grumbled and I held back a sigh.

“You just seem a bit upset s’all,” I mumbled, pouring the water from the kettle into the mug that I always used at his house, “just want to help.”

“Well it is your fault,” he mumbled it so low under his breath I wasn’t even sure I heard him correctly.

“What?” I went to sit next to him and he ran a hand through his hair before passing the newspaper over at me.

There was a picture of me clinging to his arm from a night out with his friends only last week on the front page and a headline making a dig of our age gap in black, bold letters.

“Oh,” I mumbled, my eyes scanning the article to find some not nice comments about myself.

“Yeah, oh,” he scoffed and I turned to him with my eyebrows furrowed.

“You’re making this sound like it’s my fault.”

“Well if you weren’t being so clingy that night,” he mumbled. I wanted to tell him that me being ‘clingy’ probably had nothing to do with the article. If I wasn’t so ‘clingy’ they still would have said horrible things. And most of the horrible things were about me, so really, why was he so upset?

“What’s that meant to mean?” He rolled his eyes and let out a frustrated groan.

“Look, I know you’re not used to being in the spotlight but now you are and every single move you make is important, it reflects on me and it reflects on my career.”

“All I did was hold onto your arm.” It came out more like a question as I tried to wrap my head around what we were actually fighting about.

“Which makes you seem childish,” he explained as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He pointed to the comment about our age gap to prove his point and I sat back in the chair next to him.

My instinct was to reply, ‘well I am a child.’ But I wasn’t. I was seventeen now. I was an adult.

“Sorry,” I said sarcastically, “next time I’ll let them take a picture of me when I’m working.” He made an odd noise between a groan and a grunt and ran a hand through his hair so it was sticking up in odd places.

“You’re always like this,” he groaned.

“Excuse me?”

“You’re always so clingy and when I bring it up you get all defensive. You did that night of the party as well.” My whole body got hot. Was I really that clingy? I didn’t think I was.

I was speechless.

“Look, I’m sorry,” he sighed, “I’ve got my game coming up this weekend and I’m stressed and you’re not used to this.” Cedric had his semifinal match this weekend to determine whether his team made it into the final so I understood that times were tough.

I didn’t say anything back and when Cedric finally looked over at me he scooted his chair closer to me and wrapped an arm around me.

I wanted to shove it off but I didn’t know how he would react. He was red and angry only a second ago. I couldn’t believe it only took him seconds to calm down.

He was humming as he started tracing patterns on my arm with his thumb but I was too lost in my own thoughts to notice what he was humming or drawing.

I was too focused on the article in front of me. I was smiling up at him in the picture. He was looking over my head. I looked bright and radiant. That was the night he had introduced me to everyone as his girlfriend. He had practically shown me off as if he was proud of the person I was and I wished that I could go back to that person because all I wanted to do now was hide.

~~~

Cedric said he didn’t want me to come to his semi finals match.

“What?” We were at his house again. His game was the next day and this afternoon when I apparated over to his house I thought that I would have to find that scarf I left over so I could wear it to his game.

“I’ll be too nervous if you’re there watching me.” I thought he was making no sense, but I didn’t really want to fight with him before such a big game.

“But I want to cheer you on.”

“You can,” he paused, “from home.” I sighed. It seemed ever since that article Cedric and I hadn’t stopped fighting. We fought when the restaurant got our take out order wrong (because I should’ve checked it before leaving with it), we fought when I told him I wasn’t in the mood for sex (because I had been acting distant lately) and we fought whenever we went out of the house (because there was always something I did wrong).

And I was getting sick of it so I got my bag and shrugged my shoulders.

“Fine, if that’s what you really want.” He opened his mouth to say something but I apparated away before he could get a word in. “Good luck, Cedric.”

I wanted to cry as soon as I got home, but I wouldn’t allow myself to. Allowing myself to cry was almost like admitting that there was something wrong in our relationship. Which there wasn’t. We were having sex now. Things were different.

~~~

I watched him play his stupid game on the lounge in my pyjamas. I didn’t even have my stupid scarf. I still cheered for him, even though it wasn't doing them any good because they were losing. Badly.

I was tense the whole time. I didn’t think Cedric would react very well to losing the semi-finals. Especially when they got thrashed.

I debated going over to see him, but I decided I didn’t want to deal with him in a shitty mood so I apparated to his house bright and early the next day.

“He’s the reason we fucking lost.” I was standing outside his front door, but I could hear him yell.

“Mate, I know,” I heard a second voice, “but you have to calm down.” I stupidly let myself in.

“No, I’ve been training my ass off this whole season, how is it fair that we all suffer because of his stupidity?”

“It’s not, but-”

“No, I don’t care.” I had never heard his voice so loud. I was frozen standing on the other side of his door. They were in the kitchen, but I wasn’t brave enough to make myself known. “I want him off the team.”

“Mate, you can’t-”

“He can’t even play.” I heard him hit something and I involuntarily jumped. I didn’t think I made much noise, but maybe I did because they stopped talking and walked out of the kitchen to find me standing foolishly in front of his door.

I made eye contact with Cedric. My whole body was tense and hot in the worst ways possible and I wanted to walk straight back outside his door and forget this ever happened.

“You need to calm down mate.” His teammate nodded at me in acknowledgement, before patting a hand on Cedric’s back. “I’ll talk to you later.” He said goodbye to me and walked outside, before apparating away.

I didn’t know what to say. I stood there in silence before Cedric sighed.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he said. I didn’t either. He walked back into the kitchen, hitting the table and making me flinch again.

Part of me wanted him to come over and kiss the top of my head and apologise to me just like he did whenever we fought. Part of me didn’t want him to come near me ever again.

My heart was racing. I was frozen on the spot. I hoped once Cedric and I were intimate things would change and I guess in some strange way I had gotten my wish. I guess I should’ve been more specific.

The Breaking Point

Almost at the end of three months since I had first met Cedric Diggory it was my birthday. I was very excited and I had told Cedric numerous times.

“I’ve always loved my birthday.” I had mentioned to him when we were in bed one night. He hummed in response and I turned to face him. I was lying on my side and staring up at him while he had his back resting against the headboard.

“Hello,” I chuckled, noticing that he wasn’t present. His eyes briefly turned to me before going back to staring straight ahead.

“Sorry love, what were you saying?” He had been like this since his team lost the semifinals and I was trying not to get frustrated. He hadn’t had an outburst of anger since that day I walked in on him yelling at his teammate, but for some reason I felt like I had a false sense of security.

“Just that I was excited for my birthday,” I shrugged, turning onto my back. I suddenly didn’t want to have this conversation.

“And I’m excited that you’re excited,” he smirked down at me before moving his body so he was lying on his side and looking at me. I giggled and playfully rolled my eyes.

“I’m excited to introduce you as my boyfriend to all my friends,” I mumbled, giving him a cheesy grin. He beamed at me and moved his head to press a kiss to my cheek. Most of my friends hadn’t really shown any desire to meet Cedric, they still had their concerns but I was certain as soon as they met him they would change their mind.

“Wouldn’t want it any other way.”

But apparently there was another way. I didn’t have a massive party in his defence. It was just my family and my friends and him. If he was here. But we were only an hour into the party and he still had plenty of time to show up.

We were out in a pub in Diagon Alley, the same one where I had met Cedric. I had had a few drinks but I didn’t want to forget my birthday so I was waiting a while before I had my next.

My friends were around me, dancing and laughing and I tried not to think about how excited I was to introduce them to Cedric.

“Where’s your boy toy?” One of them had laughed when they arrived. I chuckled, trying not to let anything have an effect on me.

“He’s just running a bit late, he will be here soon.” I didn’t know if he would actually be here soon, but it was what I kept telling myself.

Surely he hadn’t forgotten, I had been speaking about it for the past two weeks. I’m sure that something had come up, he wouldn’t just not show up.

Two hours into the party the fear crept in that he wouldn’t show up.

“Where’s Cedric?” My dad had asked and I thought it was funny how even though it was my birthday everyone was concerned with Cedric Diggory. So maybe my thoughts were turning a bit sour. I guess that happens when your boyfriend is late to your birthday party with no explanation.

“Just running a bit late.” I couldn’t count on both hands how many times I had said that in the past hour. He gave me a sympathetic look and I smiled back at him in response, trying to convince him everything was fine. I was feeling bad enough for myself, I didn’t need anyone else to do so as well.

I was a little embarrassed. I knew my dad was warming up to Cedric, they got along quite well. Part of me worried about how distraught my dad would be if Cedric didn’t show up (because he was going to show up). But the other part of me was too focused on how distraught I was that he wasn’t here yet.

My eye was kept on the door for the whole night. I thought that maybe if I imagined him walking in with that charming smile and his golden hair styled to perfection that it might actually happen.

It didn’t. We were now three hours into my party and I wasn’t sure that Cedric was going to show. The only word that kept replaying through my mind was why? A few times I caught someone’s eye when I finally stopped staring at the door and they gave me a sympathetic smile. I was sad that Cedric didn’t show and everyone knowing that he didn’t show felt even worse. I excused myself to go to the bathroom but it seemed everyone was trying to have fun for me and I wasn’t sure if anyone heard.

The bathroom was empty and I walked over to the sink. My hands were shaking as I turned on the tap and I thought that I was being stupid. It was my birthday. I had had plenty of birthdays without a boyfriend and while this time I actually did have one - he just didn’t show up - I told myself that this wasn’t any different.

But it was. He didn’t show up. I tried to tell myself that something had happened. He wasn’t the type of person to do this. But surely he would have sent an owl or a patronus or something. I let the cool water fall into my hands and I flicked them up so some of it would cool my face down.

I took a look at myself in the mirror and frowned. The last time I looked at myself in this mirror I was a completely different person. I hadn’t even met Cedric Diggory. I was still a virgin. Suddenly I felt like I was going to throw up and not wanting to be even more embarrassed on my birthday, my body settled for a few tears streaming down my face.

I let out a harsh sob and brought my hands up to my face. My palms were cool on my cheeks but the warm flow of tears prevented me from embracing it.

I stood there, crying for a minute until I heard the door open and I quickly pulled my hands away from my face and brought them back under the sink hoping that whoever walked in would think I was just washing my hands.

“Hey,” I heard a familiar voice and then I heard them say my name. I turned around to see Ginny Weasley, looking as stunning as ever. “What’s wrong?” The smile on her face disappeared as she saw my swollen cheeks and she started walking closer to me.

“Nothing,” I smiled. I wanted to say more. I wanted to tell her that Cedric was what was wrong. I wanted to tell her that I was stupid for ever thinking that I had a chance with the golden boy because I was starting to realise the golden boy doesn’t exist. But I had only spoken to her, like, once before so I didn’t think it was appropriate.

She stared at me for a moment, seemingly unsure what to do. I gave her a small smile but she only frowned.

“You were crying.” It sounded more like a question and when she raised an eyebrow at me I almost told her everything.

“You know what’s even worse?” I didn’t deny it. “It’s my birthday.” I let out a laugh trying to make an awkward situation better but I don’t think it had the effect I wanted it to. Her eyes widened and she took a step over to me. She put a hand out as if she was going to reach for my shoulder and I gave her a tiny nod before she placed an arm around me.

“Where’s Cedric? I’ll go get him, yeah?” I knew she meant well but that only made me start crying again and I think she realised that he was the reason I was crying and so she pulled me closer towards her. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled and the conversation ended. She started stroking my back and when I calmed down she let out a deep breath before continuing.

“You’re so young,” she mumbled, “this is only going to be a small part of your life, yeah? Enjoy your birthday.” I gave her a tight lipped smile and pulled away from her.

“Thank you,” I looked at her, “I really appreciate it.” She smiled at me and I wiped my eyes before I walked out of the bathroom.

I was going to enjoy my birthday whether a certain someone was here or not.

I had a few more drinks, suddenly not caring anymore whether or not I remembered this night.

I was near tears when everyone sang happy birthday. My eyes were glued to the door no matter how badly I wanted to look away.

I was surrounded by the people I loved yet I felt so alone and upset. I sighed when I blew out the candles. There was only one wish on my mind.

I was on my second slice of cake when one of my friends sat down next to me.

“It’s your birthday,” they slurred, “it’s supposed to be fun.” I mustered up my most convincing smile.

“I am having fun.” I wasn’t.

He should have been here.

I’m pretty sure everyone else was thinking the same thing but they were polite enough not to bring it up.

I’m pretty sure my friend was thinking the same thing, but they didn’t say either. They picked up a spoon and took a bite of my cake. We sat there, not talking, just enjoying the cake. It was saying a lot that this was the best part of my night.

I was sure everyone gave me an extra longer hug when they left and the pats on my back felt more sympathetic than celebratory but I tried not to linger on it.

That night I went to my bedroom and got into my comfiest pyjamas. There was an owl at my window when I hopped into bed and I already knew who it was from.

It was rolled up and for a moment I contemplated just ripping it to shreds without even reading it and when I opened it I wished I had.

I’m sorry I didn’t show,

Cedric xx

That was it?

I gave the owl a treat and ripped the note in half and in half again and in half again until I was sure that it could never be put back together. I was feeling a similar way. I started crying. I guess it’s not really a birthday if you don’t cry, right? I threw the crumpled paper in my bin and sat on my bedroom floor.

For a brief moment I wondered if it was my fault. It seemed all of the stupid fights we had been having had arose as a result of me, and maybe this one was the same. I wondered what it was. Whether it would appear too childish for Cedric to appear at a birthday party, or whether I would be too clingy throughout the night.

If it wasn’t for the amount of alcohol I had consumed I was sure I wouldn’t have gotten an ounce of sleep. But I woke up the next morning as well rested as I could have been and I got ready and apparated to Cedric’s house immediately.

I wasn’t sure what I planned on doing. I wanted to remember all of the good times Cedric and I had but they seemed so far away. Oddly enough they were before the first time we had sex which I only agreed to in hopes that things would get better.

I felt helpless. I wanted to go back to those picture perfect days, but I knew that there was nothing I could do to get back there. But I guess I hoped that we could work from where we currently were and get somewhere even better.

The Reeling

Standing in front of Cedric’s door I realised that this was a horrible idea. Surely Cedric and I could just go past this and maybe even just pretend it didn’t happen.

Part of me was scared that the reason he didn’t show up was because of something I’d done. For some reason I thought that maybe if I proved that I was willing to fight for our relationship, we’d unlock a new part of our relationship. Like when we finally had sex. Except this time it would unlock something even better.

I knocked on the door and let out a shaky breath.

He opened it almost instantly and he gave me a nervous smile. I let myself in and he shut the door behind me.

“Did you have fun last night, darling?” I turned back to face him and stared at him dumbly.

“You didn’t come.” I responded and he let out a sigh and walked over to me, grabbing my hand in his.

“I’m so sorry, darling.” He only rarely called me darling and I suddenly hated the way it sounded in his mouth. “I was just upset about not making it to finals and-” I took a step back from him.

“You should’ve been there.” He looked down and I sniffled when I felt the tears start to fall down my cheeks.

“I should have.” We stayed like that for a moment. My hands in his. Tears streaming down my face while he continued to stare at our hands. I thought I would be the one who would have trouble with this. I really wanted him to just look at me.

“Darling,” he paused, “I think we should break up.” My whole body went hot.

“No,” I mumbled, trying to pretend that I didn’t hear what I thought I did. How did we get here? I came here so we could make up, not to break up.

“Yes,” he replied, almost pleading with me.

“I can get over you not coming to my birthday.” I was begging and I hated myself for it. The tears had stopped but I would much rather them than whatever this was.

“It’s not about that.”

“Then what is it?” He took a deep breath as if it pained him to say this but I was sure that I was in much more pain. “I’ll do anything, just name it, I’ll do anything for you. We can make it work.” The worst part was that I meant it.

“Don’t say that,” he sighed.

“It’s true. I’m not angry,” I sobbed, “I can’t let you go.”

“You have to.” I wanted to scream. I wanted to throw my body on the floor or hit something. I already felt like a fool but I was ready to make myself look even worse and throw a tantrum right there and then.

“We’re just not going to work out.” He gave me an apologetic look, but it only made me mad.

“Why?” He blinked at me, his eyes saying that he hated me for making him say it.

“Look,” he went to reach out for me again but I pulled away, “maybe if we were closer in age, I just-” I let out a dry laugh cutting him off and felt the tears start up again. I was no longer sad. I was angry now. I had given so much of myself to Cedric and it was all for nothing. All for him to just throw it all back in my face.

“You said I was mature for my age.” I hated that I felt the need to defend myself. I was embarrassed. What a horrible thing to say. I wanted the world to swallow me up and forget that Cedric Diggory was ever an important person in my life.

“You were-you are,” he corrected himself, “but you’re still so young and-”

“But we had sex.” He gave me a look that said I was only proving his point and I wanted nothing more than to shrink into the ground beneath me.

“I’m sorry.”

“So you’re just going to throw away everything we worked towards?” He put a hand on my shoulder but I only stood there, frozen in place, not knowing what my life had just turned into.

I shoved it off and started walking to his door.

“Hang on,” he followed me, “wait.” But I didn’t. I walked out his door and slammed it behind me. I thought he was being selfish. That he was taking the easy route. He was being childish, real adults would have talked it out, but he just ran away from his issues.

I felt helpless. I wondered if I had done things differently if we’d still be together. Maybe if I didn’t make such a big deal about having sex he wouldn’t have thought I was childish. Maybe if I was more confident when we were out with his friends he wouldn’t have thought I was so clingy. Maybe we still would’ve been together.

The Remembering

I apparated straight home and went right into my bedroom. I shut the door behind me and contemplated falling against it dramatically, but it felt more right to go jump on my bed and so I did that. The tears didn’t stop and I didn’t leave my room until the next morning.

I felt so used. I was right when I was upset in the bathroom on my birthday. I was a different person and while I knew eventually this change would come, I felt that it had been forced to come early by my relationship with Cedric and it made me feel dirty. I wanted to shower to get rid of it but that didn’t help. I wanted to go on a walk to get my mind off of it but that didn’t work either. I tried to eat to cleanse my body from it but it seemed that I was stuck with this change. I was never going to get back the person that I was before him.

I didn’t realise how much I had been relying on him until I didn’t have him. I suddenly felt like a child again. Not knowing how to make my own decisions, forever unsure about what I was doing and feeling so lost and alone.

It seemed that everyone knew that our relationship had ended and I was happy because I didn’t have to tell them. I wasn’t happy, however, that they found out by a tabloid headline barely a week after Cedric had broken up with me. He was out with a model, only a year older than me, a hand on her lower back and her face close to his chest and I decided to rip that up into pieces as well.

It felt so surreal that at times I thought that I would see Cedric again until I remembered what had happened and I was enveloped by a sinking feeling. It was a self made hell everytime I remembered what had happened and I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to think about him again without feeling this way.

I was also stuck remembering all of the good times and conveniently forgetting the bad. I’d remember when we used to go out and he’d pay for dinner. Or when it was just the two of us at his house and he’d make me my favourite foods, dancing in his kitchen while we waited for it to cook. And when it was just us in bed and he’d trace patterns on my back and make me guess what he was drawing.

And I would sob even harder because I wanted to go back to those times.

But then I’d remember how he wouldn’t speak to me once the paparazzi found out where we were. Or when we would scream and fight in the kitchen and I’d be sick from it. And when I’d spend the night and we’d be on the edge of each side of the bed, our backs facing the other, refusing to be the first one to speak.

I self indulgently let myself cry and cry and cry some more for at least a week until my parents called my friends for support. Time went so slowly feeling sorry for yourself in your bedroom, that I was shocked to hear that it had been a week when my friends told me I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself.

A month later there was a charity Quidditch game that I was watching with my dad. He went to turn it off as soon as the familiar head of golden curls appeared on screen for an interview but I stopped him before he could.

“Is it true that you’ve broken up?” They were quick to mention my name as soon as the niceties were taken care of.

Just the sight of him made my heart ache. All of the memories came flooding back, the good and the bad and remembering them together felt like I was in a whole new hell.

Cedric stared at the reporter dumbfounded until he suddenly found his voice. “The match tonight is for a very important cause and I think we should focus on that.”

“People are saying that you took advantage of her because of her age, what do you say about that?” I snorted at the question.

“I think people should focus on the match tonight and the important cause it is for.” He let out an awkward chuckle but the reporter was relentless.

“Do you miss her?” Cedric shook his head and must have looked over to his manager before he was pulled away from the screen.

I felt happy that I was still affecting his life a month after our relationship because he was still affecting mine but I was sad that he didn’t seem phased by it. I was sure that if I was asked in an interview about Cedric I would start crying immediately. But then again, I was the one who was broken up with.

I still wondered if I had done things differently if I’d still have him in my life. It was a sour taste. I had spent so much time with those thoughts that I was starting to get sick of them, but the more time I spent on them, the more things I remembered that made me wonder if he would have stayed if I had done them differently.

During the match I realised that he still had my fucking scarf. The one that I had spent my hard earned money on only to wear one time. I wondered if he knew he had it. I was sure he did. I kinda hoped he did. I hoped he kept it as a reminder of me. I wanted so desperately to forget him, but I didn’t want him to forget me and I didn’t think that was asking too much.

Thirteen Years Gone

I continued to feel foolish. I remembered the first time we went out, the first time I came back to his house. Everything just seemed to fit into place and I had naively imagined a life of marriage and children. Probably little quidditch players who were just as bright as their father. At least I could laugh at it now. I was only just a child myself.

It took months before I could go about my day without him crossing my mind and it took years and plenty of relationships until I realised what they were truly meant to be like.

I mourned the loss of our picture perfect beginnings, the way he always made me feel safe and at home. The way he used to hold me at night after I had given myself to him over and over again.

It took months before I could even go back to Diagon Alley without thinking of him. And even now, when I walked past, it was more that I was able to push aside the thought of him rather than completely disregard him.

I thought that as time went on I would forget about it. That I would forget about him. And sure, I distracted myself and I eventually thought about him less and less, but my memories were as vivid as ever. The way he would look at me, his eyes crinkled, a piece of his hair covering his forehead, as if I was the only thing that mattered in his world. The way he would hold onto my hips when we hugged, his fingers drumming into the flesh of my side as I buried my face in his chest, thinking that I could stay there for eternity. But now they were all scars that I wore that changed the way I lived and thought, and even though it eventually got easier to forget him, I never forgot them.

#cedric diggory #cedric diggory imagine #cedric diggory blurb #cedric diggory angst #harry potter #harry potter imagine #harry potter blurb #harry potter angst #cd #cdi #cda

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shadowbriar · 2 years

Text

Masterlist

REQUEST BOX: Open / Closed. LAST UPDATED: 04.02.24. PROMPT LIST: List I TAGLIST FORM: Fill the form here!

Harry Potter Wizarding World

― Fred Gideon Weasley Masterlist ― George Fabian Weasley Masterlist ― Cedric Diggory Masterlist ― William Arthur ‘Bill’ Weasley Masterlist ― James Fleamont Potter Masterlist ― Remus John Lupin Masterlist ― Sirius Orion Black Masterlist ― Regulus Arcturus Black Masterlist

Lockwood & Co

― Anthony Lockwood Masterlist

Marvel

― Druig Masterlist ― Matthew ‘Matt’ Michael Murdock Masterlist

Bridgerton

― coming soon!

Grishaverse

― coming soon!

Others

― coming soon!

Moodboards

♡ Staying at the Burrow over Autumn break.

♡ Being a close friend of the Weasleys and developing romantic feelings to one of them.

Special Works

― Shadowbriar’s 1st Birthday Celebration

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avalynlestrange · 10 months

Text

Cedric Diggory

Masterlist

⳾*⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*⳾

Back to The Library (Main Masterlist)

To The Kitchen (WIPs)

Send me an owl post if you have a fic request.

Tone: ♡ Fluff ♥ Angst ❥ Suggestive Themes

⳾*⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*⳾

✿ Coming Soon

⳾*⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*⳾

#cedric diggory x reader #cedric diggory #cedric Diggory x you #cedric Diggory fluff #cedric Diggory angst #avalynlestrangelists

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softboyluvr · 2 years

Note

6 from the prompt list with fem reader and cedric diggory pls? <3 kind of like a casual not official dating or fwb situation ⭑

What she wants, what he needs

cedric diggory x reader

warnings: fwb situation, allusions to sex, angst no comfort, spelling mistakes, maybe a bad plot... so sorry

hi besties. i had exam week and then was sick so therefore I couldn't get back to requests like i wanted to. but i think now i will be able to get them done quicker... i hope

anyways hope you like this one <3

6. "you can leave. you know the way out well enough"

Before the arrangement Cedric and you were friends, and even before that he was the guy that saved you from a fast ball that was headed straight to your face. He caught your eye after that, he was always smiling, greeting the scared first years and starting small talk with those that seemed sad and lonely. He was never rude to professors, or anyone for that matter, and for some reason he wanted to be your friend.

Cedric always felt like he had to live up to people's expectations. He always felt like he could ever have a bad day, or be in a bad mood. He was Hogwart's golden boy, and the golden boy always had to be just that: golden. He needed a friend he could trust.

The library was always empty on Thursday nights. That was where you always decided to study, the peace and quiet alongside the soft glow of the candles made it a perfect place to read and finish up your homework. Cedric on the other hand was there to escape everyone else. The library felt like the only place he could be alone with his thoughts. You had just found the book you were looking for to finish writing your herbology paper, too pleased with your find you aimlessly walked out the aisle. Not really paying much attention to where you walked, no one was ever there either way, but today there was. Cedric's hands on your shoulders stopped you from colliding with his chest.

"Careful there" You looked up and saw Cedric Diggory, a bright smile on his face, his hold on you soft yet firm.

You stumbled through your words. "I'm sorry, I wasn't looking at where I was going" You smiled at him but a small twitch of his chin made your eyebrows furrow. "Hey, you okay?"

Cedric was surprised, he couldn't remember the last time someone actually asked him if he was okay. But you sounded genuine, you really meant it. You didn't know him but he felt like he could trust you, yet he didn't wanna burden you.

"Yeah, I'm good." But you could see it in his eyes, they were dull and sad.

"You sure? I'm not busy and I have heard i'm a good listener." You offered him a soft smile. He reciprocated and you led him to your table.

You listened to his problems, and reassured him when you felt necessary. By the end of the night Cedric's smile was genuine and the glint in his eyes was back. You two walked back to the dorms together, and when you bid him goodnight you were convinced. You were in love with Cedric Diggory.

For the following weeks Cedric had found himself heading down to the library every Thursday, and when that wasn't enough he had started to knock on your dorm room door. He had grown to crave your friendship, and you loved to spend time with him. A small part of you had started to wonder if maybe, just maybe, he had started to see you under a rose colored light too.

Your friendship grew as the season's changed. At times you could swear the innocent platonic touches and looks you two shared were something more, but when the day was over and you were all alone you couldn't help but wonder if maybe your own feelings were making you see things that were not there. If Cedric liked you, he would've done something by now right?

Then the summer of sixth year happened. You were visiting Cedric at his house and his parents left you both alone, it was nothing out of the ordinary anymore, you two hung out all the time and his parents loved you. You were talking about anything and everything when you confessed to him you had never had your first kiss. You two were so close and he tucked some hair behind your ear, when he leaned over to kiss you. His soft lips moving against yours slowly. Then as the kissed progressed you were tangled between his bedsheets, panting his name as he kissed along the side of your neck.

The next morning you two agreed to never talk about it again. But then it happened again, and when school started back again, you two kept dancing along that line. You two were friends, friends that had sex every once in a while. It was all no strings attached, and completely for stress relief. Or at least it was for cedric, you on the other hand kept on holding on to the hope that maybe this was the catalyst that would push your relationship over the platonic line.

It was a Thursday, you had just come back to the library and were brushing your hair while you got ready for bed. When the familiar knocks came, two knocks a pause and then three more. Cedric was here to see you. He was always extra sweet to you on these nights, he would ask you about your day, compliment you, ask you if you had eaten and then slowly you would fall back onto your bed. You had started to wonder if he knew about your feelings for him, not many people were able to pull on your heartstrings but him? He was a puppet master.

Tonight was no different, you guys talked then he leaned over to kiss you and then breathing turned labored. At the beginning he would usually cuddle into you and fall asleep with you. Then he would just wait for you to fall asleep before he slipped out of your bed and left you to wake up alone, but tonight he seemed to be in a hurry to get out. When your breathing came back to normal he was already up getting dressed.

"You're leaving already?"

He turned his head to look at you. "Yeah just have to meet up with some friends." He kept loking at you as he buttoned his shirt. "That okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good."

"You know what I heard today?" He wanted to gossip right now? "I heard that one of the Weasley's wants to ask you out. You should say yes, it's been ages since I have seen you with someone."

You felt your heart fall. A scoff left your lips. "Are you fucking serious?"

He saw the pull between your eyebrows. "Yeah?"

"Get the fuck out Cedric"

"Hey, what is wrong?"

"You. Now get the fuck out."

"C'mon why are you so angry?"

"Because we have been having sex for months now, and now you want me to go out with someone because you have not seen me with someone in years. You see me as that pathetic?"

"Y/N I never said that"

"But it's what you implied, you don't care though do you? As long as this works for you then it's all okay"

He was shocked by this outburst. In all your years of friendship he had never seen you angry at him. "Woah what? Where is this all coming from?"

"I have been in love with you for so long and I'm pretty sure you knew Cedric. I have made it so clear and I was fine with everything, I truly was. But this?"

"I thought you were over that by now" His voice was raising. "Y/N you know we both are just friends."

You looked at him for another second before turning around and pulling the blanket over your shoulder.

"Just leave."

He hesitated. "I'm not leaving you like this, let's talk it out."

"It's okay." You reached over to turn off the light, tears welling in your eyes. "You can leave. You know the way out well enough."

A beat passed before you heard the door open and then the click of it shutting. The first tear of many slipping out of your eye.

---------

requests are opened, comments and feedback are appreciated <3

#cedric diggory x reader #cedric diggory imagine #cedric diggory #cedric x reader #cedric diggory angst #cedric diggory x female reader #cedric diggory x you

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battinscn · 2 years

Text

CARDIGAN — cedric diggory x f! reader

CONTENT WARNING: angst, so much angst/ pivotal character death

SUMMARY: when cedric survives the third task, he takes it upon himself to become an auror. he joins harry during the battle of the hogwarts and fight alongside him, to repay the young boy for saving his life. we can always change our fate, but not what is destined for us.

A/N: based on this request. jfc it’s taken me 2 months to write it, i’m so so sorry. hope you like it nevertheless.

WC/ AVG. READING TIME: 3565 words/ 16 minutes

return to the cedric masterlist here

YOU WATCHED FROM the stands next to mr diggory as harry potter hovered over a body, the triwzard cup next to it.

you were about to cheer when harry started wailing, "he's back! he's back!"

since you were slightly taller than him, mr diggory had asked you what was going on. you tried to peer over all the standing bodies but to no avail, simpling shrugging to the older man in response.

that was when ernie had shouted, "it's diggory! that's cedric!"

"pardon?" you and mr diggory whipped your heads toward your blonde friend.

"that's cedric body." ernie exclaimed.

without thinking twice, mr diggory had started weaving through the stands, "let me through, let me through. that's my son."

you were hot on his tail, practically shoving your peers to the side to get on the grounds.

"my boy!" mr diggory crouched down next to cedric's unconscious body.

"what's happened? what the fuck happened potter?" you shook harry roughly, wanting an explanation.

"h-he's back. you-know-who's back, he used the crutacius on diggory!" harry sobbed.

you felt your blood grow cold, and you lost your footing. you would have fallen onto the floor if it were not for ernie holding you up.

you watched as the head of houses ushered the students back into the castle.

you watched as harry retold the events of the past hour to headmaster dumbledore.

you watched as cedric was brought away back to hospital wing to be healed.

throughout it all, your chest heaved as your eyes felt deafened. your body was shaking as ernie held you close, comforting you.

without realising, your legs carried you towards the castle entrance and outside the double doors of the hogwarts hospital wing.

mr diggory had apparated home for the night, despite his reluctance.

for student safety, dumbledore had sent anyone who was not staff or a student away from hogwarts grounds.

"are you sure you don't want to return to your dorm?" hannah asked you once more.

you shook your head as a silent 'no'.

"let's just leave for tonight, i'm knackered," justin whispered to hannah and ernie.

"what? have you lost your mind? we can't just leave her alone, she's beyond devastated." hannah whisper scolded justin.

"but it's not like us being here make any difference. she hasn't spoken a single word in the last two hours," justin frowned.

"mate, you're unbeliavable. i can't believe you," ernie shook his head.

"you lot can leave. i'll be fine by myself," you finally spoke up, effectively stopping their small fight.

"y/n, fletchley was just being a dickhead. we would stay here with you all night if we have to." hannah's eyes softened as she shifted her gaze to you.

"it's fine, i'll be fine," you pursed a smile.

"see? she said she's fine," justin started walking away dragging ernie and hannah along with him, "come on then."

"i'm sorry," hannah turned around and mouthed to you before turning the corner of the empty corridor.

you sat by the large windowsill in the corridor and rest your head in your hands as you prayed that cedric would be alright, that he would bounce back as fit as a fiddle.

you felt two figures settle next to you, causing you to pick your head up.

"hey," ernie, who was on your right, placed a hand on your shoulder while hannah, who was on your left, rubbed small circles on your back.

"we had to follow fletchley back just so he'd shut up," hannah explained, "we would never leave you alone."

"oh! here," ernie placed a grey knit cardigan on your lap. you knew it to be cedric's. "thought it might make you feel better."

you picked the cardigan up and slid your arms into it, tugging it closer to your body for warmth.

"thank you," you said gratefully, mustering the best smile your heartbroken and worried self could.

"your welcome lovey. ced will be okay, he's always been a tough arse." hannah joked.

"yea, he is, isn't he," you chuckled lightly.

hannah looped her arm around yours and you leaned your head on ernie's shoulder.

the three of you stayed like that through the night, solemn and hoping that cedric would be alright.

you woke up the next morning with an ache in your neck and a weight in your lap.

you blinked the sleep away and lifted your head up from ernie's shoulder, the bones in your neck cracking as you did. you looked down in your lap to see that hannah had fallen asleep on it.

ernie was still asleep as well, the back of his head leaning against the window behind you.

it was clear that neither of them were in a comfortable sleeping position and that they would've preferred spending the night in their plush beds. however, they had chose to accompany and comfort you through the night.

you were beyind grateful you had the friends you had.

ernie and hannah soon stirred awake when the doors of the hospital wing opened, mdm pomfrey and a healer dressed in st mungo's uniform walked out.

"is he alright? cedric, i mean," you asked politely.

"mr diggory's alive. he is no longer under critical condition, but is under induced sleep from the calming draught that was administered."

"yes, of course."

"i must make haste to see dumbledore and inform him of mr diggory's condition, you may visit if you wish," madam pomfrey gestured to the slight crack in the hospital ring door.

the three of you nodded, signalling a small goodbye to the two healers.

"we're going to return to our dorms, we'll come back after breakfast?" ernie suggested.

"yea, i'll see you two later," you agreed.

the creak of the hospital wing door opening echoed through the room.

you pattered into stone-walled room over to the cot cedric was lying in.

you frowned as you watched cedric—your cedric—laying lifelessly. you urged the will to cry again and sucked in a deep breath, sitting on the wooden chair that was next to the cot.

"oh ced," you sighed, hands trembling as you brushed the back of your knuckles against his pale, cold, face.

you pulled the woolen blanket further up cedric's torso in hopes of helping him conserve some warmth.

you were sat on the uncomfortable chair for about an hour when ernie, justin, and hannah walked in.

"has he woken up since?" hannah asked and you shook your head.

the four of you conversed in small talk when you heard the rustling of sheets behind you.

you whipped your head towards cedric and watched as his eyelids slowly fluttered open.

he tried to sit up and ernie was immediately there to help cedric up.

your poured cedric a cup of water and held the bendy straw to his lips.

"are you feeling alright?" hannah placed a comforting hand on cedric's shoulder.

you placed the cup on the small table by the cot.

"nothing hurts so i'm feeling rather well," cedric cleared his throat, his voice scratchy.

"is it true? that you-know-who's back?" justin blurted out.

you winced slightly at the bluntness of the question while ernie and hannah sent him death glares for his lack of sensitivity.

cedric licked his lips and nodded.

justin was about to open his mouth to ask yet another absurd question when ernie thankfully cut him off.

"you scared us to death mate, but we're glad you're alright. our poor y/n's been worried sick the whole night," ernie gestured to you.

suddenly all eyes in the room were pointed at you and you sniffed, wiping the fallen tear that had excaped your eye with your palm.

you sniffed with a chuckle as to try and shake off the uneasiness of being the current center of attention.

"y/n..." cedric's eyes softened at your state.

ernie and hannah shared a look with a mutual understanding that it was their cue to leave, dragging justin along with them.

"lovey," cedric reached out to grab ahold one of your fidgeting hands.

"i don't even know why i'm crying. it's so selfish considering what you had to go through to end up here but i'm just relieved you're okay," you whimpered.

with his free hand cedric's callous but gentle touch wiped by your damp lash line.

"it's not selfish lovey, it's okay to feel worried. i'm all good now so you no more tears, okay?"

"okay," you nuzzled your cheek into cedric's hand, sighing softly.

"besides, madam pomfrey said all the bleeding was internal. that's where all the blood's supposed to be!" cedric had mischievous glint in his eyes, trying to lighten your dampened mood.

you could scoff at the boy's words, shaking your head with a small giggle you rebuttled, "you are so silly sometimes."

you lurched over to cedric so you were slightly hovering above him.

"i love you," you whispered, almost afraid that if you spoke too loud it would break the serenity of the hospital wing.

"i love you too," cedric whispered back with a kiss on your lips.

following the days of cedric's recovery, him and harry potter had explained to dumbledore in great detail what exactly happened in the maze during the third task.

it seemed as though not many people believed what they had to say, claiming that cedric and harry were just trying to claim their five seconds of fame.

but you trusted cedric and what he had to say, because your golden boy could never do such a thing like lie to officials.

it seemed that the incident with he-who-shall-not-be-named had caused a slight shift in cedric.

as much as cedric tried to put him a hardfront and false facade that he was just as fine as before, you knew that he was just trying not to make anyone worry about him.

you noticed how he was more jumpy than before. he was also more alert and wary of surroundings, almost as if preparing himself for an attack at all times.

not wanting to add more stress on the already heavy weight on his shoulders, you pretended not to know.

your NEWTS happened just months after the last task. thankfully, cedric did not let the trauma of the duel in little hangleton affect his marks.

both of you had done splendidly for them, not that it mattered anymore.

before, you had wished to work at the ministry of magic, but after they had discredited cedric for claiming voldemort's return, you quickly changed your mind.

you and cedric both wanted out of the wizarding world, having enough of everything that had happened during your last year in hogwarts.

instead, with the little money you had saved, you had opened a quaint bakery in muggle watford.

your business was doing rather well. something about magically baked pastires attracted muggles back to your shop regularly, not that your customers needed to know that.

life was peaceful and you and cedric were happy.

save the occasional nightmares cedric would need waking up from.

it took a year or two for your boyfriend to open up to you about the trauma he was experiencing.

"i'm scared. i'm beyond terrified that he's going to come back one day and finish what he couldn't that day," cedric admitted with sweaty palms and a heaving chest.

“lovey,” you cooed, running your hands through his hair then settling them on his cheeks.

“it stinks. it fucking stinks. because i want to be happy, i want to live a life where i’m not in fear every waking second,” cedric looked up at the ceiling and blinked quickly to rid the tears that were about to fall.

“i’m sorry that i will never truly understand what you had to go through and what you feel because of it, and i’m sorry that you, of all people, were a victim. i would take all the weight of your shoulders and carry them for you no hesitation. but i can’t do that. what i can do, however, i’d be here for you in every way possible. i can’t say that it’d be easy, but talking about your fears alleviates them.” you sucked in a breath and shifted your position in bed, sitting on the back of your calves so you could look right into cedric’s face.

“i love you so much ced and you’re such a courageous and strong man. the man i love with all my heart and soul. so when you’re ready, i’ll be here for you.” you tried a small smile.

silence filled the room for a while.

cedric said nothing but offered a small, albeit grateful, smile and that was enough for you to know that he was feeling a little bit better.

the birth of curtis edward diggory caused something to shift in cedric, in the best way possible.

since his son’s birth, cedric smiles a little bit brighter and the creases in his eyes were a little bit deeper.

curtis was your little bundle of joy and when your baby boy turned one, it felt like all the worries in yours and cedric’s life dissipated.

“hi little lovey, who’s my baby boy?” you cooed while bouncing curtis in your hip. he had yet to show any signs of magical capabilities but you knew it was soon come.

you were currently watching cedric who had just put in a tray of unbaked lemon biscuits.

“your little baker”, you thought, as cedric wiped his buttery hands on his apron and wiped the side of his cheek, leaving a dusty swab of flour in its wake.

“that’s the last for the sunday pickup order,” cedric walked over to your and curtis, placing kisses on the crown of both of your heads.

you basked in cedric’s embrace, your head on his chest while curtis was on yours.

you were in complete bliss.

the comforting atmosphere was broken when the flaps of an owl’s wings sounded through the kitchens.

cedric pulled away from you reluctantly with a confused glance to the window.

there, on the windowsill, perched an owl that looked awfully familiar.

the weasley family’s owl dropped the letter in cedric’s hands before flying off to deliver the other letters that filled it’s beak.

knowing that you and cedric wanted to separate your muggle lives from your magical ones as much as possible, bar the occasional visits from those closest to you, communication between family and friends were limited, letters included.

cedric’s eyes scanned the letter, the worry on his face growing as he read.

“p-potter…” cedric stuttered, “potter’s fighting voldemort, tonight, at hogwarts.”

your eyes widened in shock, “w-what?”

you and cedric decided to close up the shop early that day, returning home in a hurry.

curtis was napping with his cheek against your shoulder as you watched cedric pace the small area of your sitting room for what felt like a full hour.

cedric chewed on the back of his thumb, his furrowed brows in a deep frown.

“i have to go,” cedric said, almost as if it was the most obvious thing.

you quickly shot that idea down, “no, lovey, it’s not safe.”

“i have to. potter saved my life that day at the cemetery. the least i could do is fight by his side tonight.” cedric remained firm.

tears welled in your eyes and you hiccuped from the gut-wrenching sobs that were bubbling from inside you.

"darling..." cedric was on his knees in front of you, stroking your hair as you sat on the sofa trying your best not to wake curtis with your beating heartbeat and shaky voice.

"i-i know it's selfish, but i get to be selfish. i don't want you t-to g-go. i c-can't lose you, not again."

"i have to do this, you know that." cedric affirmed.

you nodded your head in understanding. you knew that since the triwizard tournament, cedric had always felt indebted to potter, that he owed his life to the young boy, but you deserved the right to beg your husband to stay, no matter how selfish it was.

"you won't lose me, neither of you won't. i promise." cedric held your face with both hands.

you watched with deafened ears as cedric changed into a more ‘battle appropriate’ outfit.

the bottom dresser was opened for the first time in a while, and cedric picked up his wand.

“i’ll always love the both of you, you know that right?” cedric began his teary goodbye.

you couldn't find it in you to respond. merely nodding your head and sniffing at his rhetorical question.

cedric placed a kiss on curtis’ chubby cheeks before placing him back in your arms.

“i love you, lovey,” you mumbled against his lips, fisting cedric’s shirt.

“i love you,” cedric chased a kiss, pulling away only to wrap his arm around you shoulders, his hand holding the back of your head endearingly.

with a small wave, and blow kiss from you and curtis, cedric disapparited.

the only way you could keep your anxiousness at bay was to keep yourself busy and so you rushed around the house, cleaning and wiping down every surface.

you played with curtis for a bit, then cooked dinner for the both of you. you eventually fell asleep on the sofa, curtis laying on your torso.

you awoke the next day to knocking on your front door. you placed curtis in the small crib in the living room and stalked to open the door.

the moment you saw the solemn look on the two ministry officials that were standing in the corridor, your stomach dropped.

you had finally signed a franchise deal with a major corporation to expand your small bakery to open more locations around london.

that meant you could afford to move out your rental.

it was difficult to live in a home you had started with the person you thought you would have spent the rest of your life with.

waking up to a cold and empty bed was miserable and yet you felt guilty for moving.

moving away felt like you were leaving cedric.

you heaved a sigh and shook yourself out of your thoughts as you placed the paper-wrapped plates into the large moving carton.

you heard rustling and the barreling of feet on the parquet flooring.

you turned on your feet, ready to greet curtis with open arms but as you did, you were met with your brunette boy clad in a familiar knitted grey cardigan, a unicorn hair, ash, wand in his hand.

your breath hitched as you dropped the plate you were holding in your hand.

curtis immediately flinched as the ceramic shattered into a millio pieces over the kitchen floor.

“shit,” you murmured under your breath as you bent down quickly to pick the pieces up in your hands, “curtis, stay in the front room okay? let mummy clean up.”

you swept away the remains of the dish and vacuumed the area for good measure, less curtis cut himself accidentally.

when you walked into the front room to see curtis sitting down on the sofa, his legs dangling off it since he was too short to reach the floor, while inspecting cedric’s old wand.

when the ministry had visited you the day after the battle, they had returned cedric’s wand to you.

after the battle, you swore off the wizarding world bar the biweekly visits to cedric’s parents’ place. you weren’t sure what you would do when curtis would start showing his magical abilities but for now, you wanted him safe and away from the world that took your world away from you.

“curtis? where’d you find all this?” you sucked in a breath and balanced yourself by gripping the arm of the armchair and settling shakily into it.

curtis looked so much like his father, and now clad in cedric’s cardigan, it felt like deja vu.

“you told me to help back the things in your room and i found them in a box under your bed,” curtis explained.

noting your expressionless face, curtis hopped off the sofa and treaded lightly towards you.

“are you mad at me?” he asked with his adorable doe eyes staring up at you.

“n-no, no, lovey, i’m not mad. it’s just, those things were daddy’s a-and you remind me so much of him,” you swiped your cheek with your palm.

living in this house was big enough of a reminded of cedric’s passing, and so after his burial, you packed everything that reminded you of cedric in a box, never to see the light of day again because you knew just one look would cause all the effort you had put in to try and move on to crumble.

but somehow seeing curtis jn cedric’s cardigan, which was overtly big on the little boy, it didn’t bring up any miserable or longing feelings for your deceased husband. instead the feeling of curtis being able to have some form of physical connection to his father made you feel warm inside.

“really? this cardigan’s daddy’s?”

you nodded along and stroked curtis’ hair, “it is, and you look so handsome in it, just like daddy.”

curtis beamed at your statement and pulled the cardigan, which was so big on him that the hem of it dragged along the floor, closed to his body.

“can i keep it?” curtis asked hopefully.

“of course you can, little lovey,” you offered a small but loving smile.

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soolarity · 2 years

Text

Champagne Problems

C. Diggory x OC (Yuna) - 3.9k words

Warnings: swearing, food mentions, social anxiousness, panic attacks, mentions of Cho x Harry, slightly out of character characters?

Summary: As a fifth-year muggle-born in Slytherin, Yuna was used to the stares and whispers thrown at her. She was used to letting them slide past her with a cold stare and an icy reputation. But when her greatest weakness and best friend, Cedric Diggory, asks her to the Yule Ball, the emotions she tried to desperately bottle up erupt all at once and she'll have to learn how to face her feelings than run away.

Here's my masterlist!

A/n: I just listened to champagne problems and afterglow nonstop and suddenly this appeared in front of me, I don’t know why or how. This is very self-indulgent and niche but it feels like doing it an injustice if I re-wrote it to Cedric x reader so here ya go. Hopefully I'll come back with more fics though, both x reader and OC. Enjoy!

Yuna wasn’t weak. Ever since her first day at Hogwarts, and essentially her first day of being a witch, she never allowed herself to be weak. The sorting hat proudly declared her a Slytherin with a purpose. She had the ambition and pride to defy all odds as a muggle-born witch. For the past five years, Yuna had carefully built herself the strongest front she could muster, but who knew that a single dance could bring it all down. Yuna wasn’t weak, but she sure as hell felt like it. It reminded her of her first day as a naïve witch hearing the hesitant claps at her house declaration. She hated it.

It was a cold December morning and the students were buzzing with far too much excitement for a Monday morning. Yuna was on her way to the great hall, already dreading sitting in the Slytherin table. An unfortunate side effect of her self-built fortress is the isolation or intimidation of others from her, which often lead to silent breakfasts, lunch, and dinners alone.

Hopefully this morning would be as uneventful as possible, as the last one lead to an unfortunate first year running off. Merlin, if the dumb houses didn’t exist, she’d much rather sit next to Cedric Diggory, her safe haven and long-time friend, rather than the cursed crowd that is her own house.

How she and Cedric ‘golden boy’ Diggory even stayed friends was beyond her, but she vividly remembers the first time they met. After searching for the platform 9 ¾ for more than an hour, she stumbled into a father, a son around her age with unruly brown hair, and an odd-looking owl. Cedric helped her in navigating the train station and the entire wizarding world, and she couldn’t be more grateful for him.

But when she learned about the housing system and sorting ceremony, she was terrified at the fact that she would be split from her very first and only friend. Fortunately, she was wrong, because however stubborn she was to keep up the intimidating Slytherin reputation, Cedric was more stubborn in keeping her at his side.

As Yuna stepped inside the great hall, she silently prayed to Merlin that this breakfast would be as uneventful as possible. The stress of the impending Yule Ball only adds to her misery that is Monday mornings. Her game plan was to quickly and silently assemble a sandwich and bolt to her first class. And it all went smooth, until a certain Hufflepuff student decided to interrupt her process.

“Good morning Yuna,” Cedric greeted.

“Diggory.” Yuna replied back, not taking her eyes off her plate and her unfinished sandwich.

“Well, glad to see you all bright and cheerful today.”

“Diggory, you know I’m not a morning person.” Yuna finally looked at him.

Cedric waved her deadpan expression off. “I know, I just thought you’d be more excited today because of the Yule Ball.”

Yuna cracked a small smirk, “Oh right, Mr. Hogwarts champion,” Cedric looked downwards, flustered.

“Good luck finding a date, although I don’t think you’ll have much of an issue with all the people willing to throw themselves on you.”

“Sounds like you’re jealous,” Cedric smirked. Now it was his turn to strike back.

“Oh, not at all, in fact I feel sorry for you and your owl, with the amount of fan letters that poor bird has to carry.” Unfortunately for Cedric, Yuna is a tough nut to crack.

“I quite enjoy it actually, the title of Hogwarts champion.” He boldly stated.

“Maybe try to work on your lying skills Ced, we both know you absolutely hate the constant attention.” His eyes flickered to the groups of girls and boys alike watching him and his conversation with his best friend. He sighed and decided to give up on the act.

“You’re right.” Cedric huffed.

Suddenly, he bolted upright as if he was struck with a brilliant idea. Yuna eyed him wearily on whatever idea his mind suddenly came up with. Cedric was a good student with his head on his shoulders but she was still cautious.

“Go to the Yule Ball with me.”

Yuna choked on her bite.

Cedric quickly gave her a glass of pumpkin juice and rubbed her back as she tried to recover from the mild heart attack, he gave her. Attend the Yule Ball with him??? The Hogwarts golden boy and champion??? Had he officially gone insane? Yuna thought he truly had.

“Diggory? You can’t just suddenly spring it to me.” She exclaimed. There goes her uneventful Monday morning.

“Why not? You’re my best friend, there’s no one else I’d rather go with.”

“No, Diggory. Just no.” She abandoned her sandwich, appetite completely leaving her body. “You know who the fuck I am right? Having me as your official date is basically social death! You hate attention, you know I do too yet you ask me this? To put me, us in front of everyone? I’m sorry Diggory but no.”

The pressure of the entire table and possibly the entire great hall witnessing their conversation was too much, she needed to get out immediately. She stormed out of the great hall, not caring where her feet took her, as long as it was away from anyone. A part of her consciousness felt guilty, so guilty for leaving Cedric alone and rejected on the Slytherin table, but in the end, she couldn’t bring herself to care.

He knew how much she dealt with everyone’s attention on her ever since her first year. Cedric witnessed how she was bullied and isolated due to her blood status and Hogwarts house yet he still decided to put her on the spot not only in the ball but in the great hall this morning. And to top it all off, he wanted to go as best friends. It made her feel like a sick joke to him and this entire school. It made her want to stomp out any spark of feelings she felt for Cedric, even if it was a bon fire burning since the first year. It made her panic.

What a great start of the week.

The entire week of Yule Ball preparation was hell. The stress of the event preparation on the teachers and staff plus the hormone-riddled nervousness of students asking out their dates was nothing short of a nightmare.

Yuna had a headache ever since the incident on Monday, the guilt and shame from rejecting Cedric haunting her like moaning myrtle with a personal grudge on her soul. And now, as the sun set below the castle grounds, as she stood amidst the girls running to perfect their make-up, Yuna felt hollow. The sickening nervousness and dread from the entire week culminated into an emptiness she hated. Cedric found a date, easily, apparently to the whispers of her dormmates.

Yuna’s relationship with her dormmates were civil, some could even be her acquaintances, not minding her blood status and in fact being impressed with her reputation, but others were less than stoked at sharing a room with Yuna. It did end up resulting in a feud in her first year and a few stolen clothes and items, but professor Snape was strict with dorm assignments and they all grew up past the immaturity. (If they didn’t Yuna could easily take a few things of theirs to even it out, after all, they did share a room together.)

Yuna’s dormmates were how she ended up standing in the chaos with her dark blue, almost black, ballgown sprawled around her like a centerpiece around the bustling people. She stuck out like a sore thumb.

“Yuna, why haven’t you done your hair yet?” Hannah, one of the kinder dormmates asked the girl. “I just learned a spell to create curls, I can teach it if you’d like?”

Pansy puffed at her offer. “I doubt her hair would save her now. Bold of you to even attend the ball after rejecting Diggory.”

“Poor Cedric, he looked so heartbroken at the table. If he asked me, I would’ve said yes in a heartbeat.” Flora sighed wistfully and continued to apply mascara.

“How’d you even do it? Did you slip an amortentia in his cup or something?”

Pansy’s comments were getting were making Yuna’s patience run thin by the second, but she knew that storming out of the room would only give Pansy the satisfaction, so Yuna stayed and pretended to fuss about her appearance like the rest of them. She took up on Hannah’s offer and helped Daphne with her dress. At least the intricate lacing can distract her for at least a moment.

It was exactly twenty minutes before the grand start. Students gathered in the hallway in their extravagant dresses and robes, multicolored glitter and sparkles shining endlessly under the light.

Yuna stood slightly in the back, the onslaught of color making her eyes hurt. She tried to rub her temples to ease the pain. Amidst her stress and color induced headache, Harry and Ron descend the staircase, stopping at the last step as they look into the crowd of students.

“Hey Potter, Hi Ron.” She greeted the two.

Although they were a year apart and from opposing houses, she still had respect for the infamous golden trio and the shenanigans they went through every year. To go through that many near death experiences in such a short time is impressive and slightly concerning, which is why she tries to help them out to the best of her abilities such as turning a blind eye whenever she encountered them beyond curfew and maybe slipping a few secrets and rumors only found in the Slytherin common room.

Yuna just thought of it as a repayment of sorts by being the new talking point of the school rumor mill, essentially distracting others from talking about her. And also sort of saving the school multiple times.

“What are you two whispering about?” Ron and Harry were caught off guard, not expecting her to be next to them.

“Oh, uhm, we were just talking about Hermione, haven’t seen her today much.” Harry replied timidly.

“Nice robes Ron.” Yuna nodded at him. He grumbled in reply, miffed at her comment. Yuna had never seen robes as… eccentric… to put it lightly. It was odd even by muggle fashion standards, which wizards and witches often found eccentric.

“What happened to Hermione?” She kitted her eyebrows in worry. Hermione was a good kid; it would’ve been a shame if she missed the ball.

“She doesn’t have a date, probably crying in her dorm right now.” Ron answered.

“What? I thought she was asked out by Viktor.” Harry looked surprised while Ron furrowed his eyebrows in denial.

“Viktor? As in Viktor Krum?” Ron exclaimed in shock.

“Well, at least I think so. Heard it from some Gryffindor students on Thursday.” The girl responded back.

“There you are, Potter.” Professor McGonagall suddenly approaches them. “Are you and Miss Yuna ready?”

“Ready Professor?” Harry asked, caught off guard.

“The dance. It’s traditional that the three champions, well in this case four, are the first to dance. Surely, I told you that?”

Judging by the boy’s expression, the Professor, in fact, did not tell Harry about the first dance. “No,” He replied.

“Well, now you know. As for you Mister Weasley,” The Professor pauses, taken aback by Ron’s shocking dress robes. “You may proceed inside to the great hall.” Professor McGonagall turns to another student behind them, in a rush to keep all the people in order.

Yuna panicked, she couldn’t dance with Potter, not in front of everyone as his guest. Not in front of Cedric and Cho.

She stuttered out an excuse. “Oh, I’m horrible at dancing.”

She looked at Parvati and her twin sister Padma, who were conveniently close to them. “Patil? Would you like to dance with him?”

Yuna didn’t wait to hear the girl’s reply before rushing off to the great hall, blending in with the crowd. But amidst the tule and bowties, she caught a glimpse of grey eyes.

“What’s up with her?” Ron asked Harry but the boy just shrugged, not knowing either. As Ron begrudgingly made his way into the great hall, Harry’s eyes drifted to catch Cho’s own dark brown eyes. She had her arms linked around Cedric’s whose eyes and thoughts were on someone else in the crowd.

Yuna stood at the sidelines, shielded by other onlookers as the champions began to dance. The violins were light and magical but her heart felt like the heaviest stone weighing her down. Her heartbeat was in sync with the music in the most dreadful way. A loud clock ticking to her doom.

She watched as they danced and flowed effortlessly like water in a stream. She watched as they lifted their partners with the swell of the music. She watched as Cedric smiled at her-

She couldn’t keep on watching.

Yuna felt sick, claustrophobic under the magical winter sky. Her iridescent gown felt like a dress of barbed wires and the ground felt like a fragile sheet of ice, ready to crack under her and drown any moment. She needed air. And as always, she ran away. From her problems, from her reality, from him.

The little remaining common sense in her rang alarm bells at the weather outside, but the rest of the panicked thoughts overwhelmed it. She couldn’t care less of hypothermia if it meant escaping the scenario in front of her. Yuna would rather freeze than watch them, being frozen would be more merciful than being shattered.

The girl slipped out of the great hall, luckily most were distracted by the dance. Her face was taut, trying not to cry, as she marched out towards the open castle courtyards. Maybe the cold will distract her from her pain, maybe it will finally freeze her heart, she hoped so.

The warmly lit hallways turned into the dim corridors until the open courtyard was finally in reach. The fountain was frozen over in ice, with the trees bare or a shade of brown. Everything was illuminated by the moonlight and sparse candles in the courtyard. Yuna could finally breathe again.

Instead of shaking and complaining about the cold, she relished how the crisp winter air made her lungs sting. She let the snowflakes seep into her skin and hair, covering her in speckles of white, like small diamonds from the sky. She was never more grateful for winter.

Yuna made her way towards the center, brushing her fingertips against the old tree in a silent greeting, her constant silent companion. She sat on the ledge of the fountain and stared out into the darkness of the night.

Sometimes, with the stress of family expectations and her reputation made her forget the things she took for granted. Some of these things are her magic, being the first witch in her family line. Another was that Hogwarts was located in the mountainous region of Scotland, meaning civilization was hours away and nothing could disturb her and the stars.

When she was a little girl, she always loved looking at the stars. She thought they were like gemstones hidden under the thick blanket of the sky. And as she grew older, the more she sought comfort in the distant stars.

She told them stories of her adventures as a child, running around her family home, she told them about the letter she magically received one day, sent by an owl, she tells them about her fears and thoughts. Thoughts about the brand-new world she was suddenly thrusted in, about her peers and the disgust or fear in their eyes around her, about her closest and only friend.

Yuna exhales, a cloud of breath floating to the sky.

Cedric danced with the grace and poise of a gentleman, lifted Cho at the perfect moment, held her waist with the perfect pressure, yet everything seemed too perfect. Like a rehearsal of the actual event, his eyes were stern in concentration instead of wonder. His mind counted every beat with precision. Although his body was here, dancing in perfect harmony, his mind and heart was somewhere far away.

His gaze wandered away from his partner and onto the onlooking crowd, he carefully scanned every face and dress, searching for a familiar set of eyes and a dark iridescent gown. Finally, he caught a glimpse of an iridescent movement, weaving in between the sea of people. It made him falter, the consistent grip on his partner loosening and his steps stumbling slightly. It made Cho look at him in surprise and concern, but he quickly recovered, remembering the next move to be a turn.

As he turned in tandem with the rest, she disappeared from his sight, leaving nothing but a door ajar in her wake. It made him frustrated and restless, counting every second until the grating violins stopped playing.

To Cedric’s relief, the dance finally ended, and the music shifted from a formal waltz to energetic punk. Waves of people came rushing into the center floor, barricading the boy from following what he was searching for. Cedric at least had half the mind and decency to apologize to Cho before running off.

“It’s okay, I know.” She spoke, giving an understanding hand to Cedric’s tense shoulders. Cedric gave her a grateful smile in return, and turned to leave the great hall, making his way against the crowd.

Cho’s smile waned as she watched him pursue his true feelings, knowing he never truly saw her, although it was fun and easy to pretend he did when he asked her in the corridor to be his date to the ball. But she knew how stubborn he was, how stubborn feelings were, and how it would always lead you to the one you love the most, even in the most uncertain of situations.

She turned to look behind her, sensing a presence. Cho’s eyes locked with bright green ones hidden under circular glasses. It was Harry, the infamous boy who lived, the boy who kept looking at her since the fateful meeting in the train. Cho smiled at him and he smiled nervously back. Maybe she could still have fun tonight, with a different person that finally saw her.

“….Yuna.” The way he said her name, light and airy, could rival any symphony. It made her warm and hopeful in even the coldest of winters. It made her love her name.

“Yuna.” Okay maybe the cold really was getting to her. Were auditory hallucinations a side effect of hypothermia?

“Yuna!” Her trance was finally broken, she tore her eyes away from the stars and the inky black sky behind her to a figure. It was difficult to see the face from the distance and the dim moonlight but she knew it was him.

“Yuna! What are you doing outside here in the cold?” Cedric worriedly exclaimed.

She didn’t know what to do, or how to respond, she was like a deer in headlights, or a child getting caught doing something she shouldn’t. After a while, she simply breathed out his name. That’s when the cold finally seeped in, where the weight of the snowflakes finally melted into her bones.

“Merlin, what were you thinking?! You’re going to freeze to death at this rate!” Cedric pulled her up and into his arms, rubbing her skin frantically in hopes of warming her up. She slowly leaned into his touch and laid her head on his broad shoulders, his familiar scent of cologne and warmth enveloping her instantly. The metaphorical dam cracked inside of her at the scent and touch of him.

Cedric paused as he felt Yuna start to shiver, her tears dampening the collar of his robes. He had seen her cry plenty of times before, in the shadows of the corridors, in the nights past curfew, with him always beside her, and every time he swore that he would do anything for her to never cry again, even if it meant fighting the biggest dragon or carrying all the stars, as long as it was for her. It was a promise he made to himself when he was twelve years old and it’s a promise he still keeps until now.

“I’m sorry.” Yuna whispered, clinging tighter onto Cedric. “I shouldn’t have rejected you in front of everyone and ruined this night by making you search for me. I’m sorry.” She sobbed, letting the waterfall of emotions escape her carefully built walls.

“Yuna, it’s alright. In fact, I should be the one apologizing for asking you in front of everyone in the first place, I forgot how you felt with everyone watching us. I shouldn’t have forgotten that. And you didn’t ruin this night for me at all. I’d rather be with my best friend than dance in the great hall without you.”

Yuna’s heart clenched at the word. Best friend.

“I would feel horrible not realizing you were out here in the cold while I was inside.” He rubbed her back in comfort, bringing her as close as possible and leaning his head on hers.

“I’m sorry for constantly running off.” She mumbled into his neck.

“Hey, none of that apologizing now. You have nothing to apologize for.” He held on tightly and started to gently rock the both of them side by side, a silent waltz under the moon.

The movement made Yuna feel slightly better, the overwhelming emotions replacing with a calmer sadness and a hopeful comfort. “I don’t know how you deal with me, Diggory.”

“I choose to deal with you because you’re smart, and funny, and so unbelievably kind in your own way. You defy expectations and help people in need of help. You are so much more than what other people say, Yuna.” Cedric confessed. In his mind, I choose you because I love you.

Cedric looked down at Yuna and the small smile on her lips, relief flooded his body at the sight of it. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He smiled. Even in the freezing winter air, Cedric found a way to melt her icy exterior. It made Yuna feel soft, weak even, but in the best possible way.

“Now, let’s go inside and get you all warmed up, yeah?” Cedric softly murmured before reluctantly unfolding from the embrace.

Yuna missed the warm embrace almost immediately, only now realizing how cold it actually was. Maybe it was because she wasn’t clouded anymore by jealousy and sorrow, or maybe because the warmth from Cedric made her unaccustomed to the temperature, she loved moments ago.

Cedric noticed how she stiffened and shook more and removed his jacket, wrapping it around her shoulders. Yuna blushed at the act, thinking what a sight she must have been, draped in the Hogwarts champion’s jacket.

Cedric stared at her with a mix of emotions in his grey eyes that neither of them could decipher, just the sight of her in his jacket stirred something in him, maybe protectiveness, or awe, or admiration.

It was a silent conversation held between the two, not knowing where it ended and where it began. But Cedric moved first, stepping closer until his shoes touched hers, and Yuna closed the gap, leaning on her toes. He raised his hand to hold her cheek gingerly as she pressed her lips onto his.

The kiss was gentle and scorching at the same time, like embers that sparked into a burning fire. Cedric felt whole as he held her in his palm. Yuna felt warm as she finally embraced her feelings for him whole-heartedly and without hesitation.

For the first time in a long while, she smiled sincerely and full of love. Her mind was quiet, the anxious thoughts of others replaced by warm thoughts of him. Yuna thanked every star in the sky for Cedric, and Cedric thanked the universe for her.

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