#getting groceries and chatting with friends

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for being kind and civil with people who drive me insane?

So this is something that happens all the time and it's a pattern so to save your time, I'll only mention the one incident which that I got called out for several times, it's starting to make me think I might be TA.

I (34F) work in a grocery store. Maddy (???F) works in the security department and is in charge for looking through our grocery to ensure we didn't steal anything (our workplace is uncomfortably strict about this since many employees have stole in the past) She is very rude, I never liked her. She makes me so uncomfortable a lot because she yells all the time. At everyone. She never realized how offensive she is.

Anyway, sometimes I'd walk past her after my shift forgetting that I'm carrying grocery bags etc and she'd yell at me to get back there. It's always embarrassing because anyone who witnesses that would most likely assume I'm a shoplifter because of the way she's yelling. She yells about other stuff too mind you, don't think I always forget the fact I'm carrying grocery. They don't allow us to bring our bags inside and we have to keep them in our locker (according to her, I never heard this elsewhere). She yells at me if I try to take my purse with me if I'm in a hurry. She says it's ~the rules~ and we need to follow them but like, she the only security staff who's this strict about it. The others don't even bother to check our groceries because they trust we don't shoplift and it's actually stupid because we could still shoplift anyway and hide the items in our pockets and they don't perform a body check anyway (they used to in the past but were legally required to stop because of Covid).

How do I deal with her though? Every time she'd yell, I reply to her very calmly and attempt small talk to absorb her anger. For example, if she's angry about my grocery, I'd show them to her and ask stuff like "what is you favorite brand of milk/bread/egg etc etc"

She does engage but it never made her actually stop and think about her behaviors for a single second. I have always stopped to chat with her whenever I can and she always speaks calmly when I do, but returns to yelling when I "break the rules" as she says.

But here's the thing. My patience is limited. I'm like a battery, if you keep charging me, I'll eventually explode. I planned remaining civil with Maddy forever, but enough is enough and I accidentally lashed out. I lashed out on her ONCE only, I yelled much louder than she did, for 30 minutes, lecturing her about work etiquette. She was so surprised and taken aback. She told me "where did this all come from?" Like she didn't see it coming? She seriously mistook my patience and tolerance of her behaviors for friendliness. And that was the last time we talked, I reported her to HR the next day because I don't think she'll ever get the memo, and that's when I learned thst so many employees have complained about her already but they can't fire her because she an outsource and has strong connections in her company, management has already talked to her numerous times but she just doesn't listen, so don't call me TA for not communicating, it doesn't work with her.

My friend Gloria (28F) and many others including our manager (F30s) told me I should've not been chatting with her, I should just ignore her and disengage. They think the fact I'm talking kindly to her will just make her assume she isn't doing anything wrong and encourage her to keep behaving like that, and that she'd think I want to be friends??? None of that is my intention. I just want to be civil to her to indirectly get her to realize her behaviors weren't acceptable. I'm setting a good example for her, to learn from me how she should treat people and soften her heart.

I was called TA because they said I didn't have to be civil with her if I knew I might eventually lash out (but lashing out isn't something I planned??), and I should've just avoided her and set boundaries. Gloria told me it's an AH move to go out of my way to interact to someone I despise when ignoring them is an option and that makes me two faced and makes the people around me wonder if I truly like them or I'm basically tolerating them, but this wouldn't happen if I they weren't rude in the first place?

BTW a similar thing eventually happened with Gloria because her attitude sucked with me and I lashed out eventually because enough is enough, she said she should've known not to trust me because of how I treated Maddy and I shouldn't have befriended her if I "hated" her so much. AITA?

#aita #am i the asshole #eyestrain

[garmmy]

2024 jp trip report (food edition)

i had originally planned to visit tokyo in 2020, but covid happened and...finally this year i managed to go on the trip! ;w; i rarely go overseas but it was really fun just walking around and stumbling upon things. i want to save up for the next japan trip already...

i'm making the post mostly to remember where i've been! i'm splitting up the food and the sights because of tumblr's image limit per post 🙄 will be posting the food here!

(sights edition here)

Day 1 (13/5/2024)

we arrived at night so pretty much everything was closed, but before i went to bed i had some cold haikara udon...i love cold udon so much and wish there was a way to get it cheap back home 😭 i also added some chilli oil with garlic, but it wasn't spicy..only the first day in and i miss singapore's spicy food 😂

Nakau なか卯 (chain store, multiple outlets)

Day 2 (14/5/2024)

we spent day 2 at ikebukuro and nakano...mostly browsing weeb shit 😭

started the day with some breakfast at komeda's coffee, they have a morning set and auugfhjhghh the bread used in japan cafes' toast is always so soft and fluffy..obsessed

Komeda's Coffee コメダ珈琲店 (chain store, multiple outlets)

at nakano broadway, the basement had some supermarkets/grocery stores and one of them sold sashimi. i didn't end up buying from here, but...LOOK at this sashimi, for 580jpy?? omg 😭😭😭 i want

we had lunch at a hayashi rice place near nakano broadway! i had curry omurice myself while my friend got the hayashi omurice. the omelette was sooo good...society if i could cook an egg like this on my own

Hayashi-ya Nakano-so ハヤシ屋中野荘 164-0001 Tokyo, Nakano City, Nakano, 5 Chome-55-15

and for dinner we had monjayaki at ikebukuro..we've never tried like, actually cooking the monjayaki before? so it was a fun experience!

Monjaya Mon もんじゃや紋 170-0013 Tokyo, Toshima City, Higashiikebukuro, 1 Chome−12−10 ヤンズビル 3F

Day 3 (15/5/2024)

on my morning walk i decided to try a canned drink from a vending machine. satsuma-imo milk! so in singapore, there was recently a 'nutri-grade' rating introduced mandatory for all drinks to indicate the sugar level in the drink. i didn't think i would miss it in japan LOL i'm sorry but drinking this drink was like drinking sugar syrup T_TT i think as i got older my sugar tolerance has drastically dropped..

we started at akihabara, and had brunch at niku no mansei (yes the well-known building with like 10 floors of meat before it closed, i think it split into a couple of places?) we went to the akiba place branch for their hemborger hamburg steak...how am i supposed to go back to eating it in singapore after this?? 🫠 IT'S SO GOOD (i'm also laughing at the token broccoli though)

Niku no Mansei Akiba Place 肉の万世 アキバプレイス店 101-0021 Tokyo, Chiyoda City, Sotokanda, 3 Chome−15−1, Akiba Place, 3F

after akiba we went to asakusa, and since it's asakusa we had to have some tendon..we just went into one of the tendon places we spotted but i didn't realise it was akimitsu!? we have akimitsu in singapore too 😂 but loved the tempura eel!

Akimitsu 秋光 111-0032 Tokyo, Taito City, Asakusa, 1 Chome-29-11

Day 4 (16/5/2024)

i got some plum onigiri from famima for breakfast on my morning walk. oughgkhghjh i already miss conbini onigiri so much...affordable yet tasty! i really love onigiri, but our convenience store onigiri in singapore is a bit overpriced, which wouldn't be so bad if the onigiri itself wasn't also terrible with cold hard rice :')

we started the day at tsukiji outer market. SEAFOOD..... we finally got some sashimi today, my beloved,,, we had engawa truffle salt sushi and also a sashimi bowl of the day. and also it was my first time trying shiokara! apparently it's squid in a kind of sauce made from fermented fish/sea animal innards. i'm not sure if it might be an acquired taste, but for a seafood lover like me it was so good 🥺 the lady serving us food was also really nice and we had a little chat even with our terrible spoken japanese lol.

Taneichi たねいち 104-0045 Tokyo, Chuo City, Tsukiji, 4 Chome-9-5

i also found shirako in the market! it was my first time eating it (i think it can be found in singapore? but not particularly common). other than the shiso leaf it was served plain though, while i like the taste i kinda wish i had rice or something to go with it.

also we got some matcha latte from the market before leaving! i got the 'less sweet' which was perfect, when a lot of times the least sweet (without being zero sugar) option from drink stores are too sweet for me..

Matcha Stand Maruni マッチャスタンドマルニ 104-0045 Tokyo, Chuo City, Tsukiji, 4 Chome−14−18

some ramen for dinner at ryogoku! admittedly i'm not a super into ramen person 😅 but butter in noodles is always such a nice combo!

Tadokoro Shoten 田所商店 (chain store, multiple outlets)

and some parfait for supper. look at their logo!! so cute 🥹🥹🥹

Mayonaka Farm (Ryogoku Yokozuna Yokocho outlet) 真夜中牧場 両国横綱横丁店 130-0026 Tokyo, Sumida City, Ryogoku, 3 Chome-22-8

Day 5 (17/5/2024)

started the day with some zaru soba. it was nice but cold soba was kind of a mistake because it was raining that morning and so COLD lol

Yudetaro ゆで太郎 (chain store, multiple outlets)

we started at shinjuku today and walked our way down to shibuya. with my friend's recommendation we tried blue bottle coffee? the latte was nice and even had this natural sweetness(?) to it despite not adding sugar.

Blue Bottle Coffee ブルーボトルコーヒー (chain store, multiple outlets)

and then we went to takeshita street. i think marion crepes is the most well-known one, but the queue..??? so we ended up going to another crepe store. it's still a treat and has a variety of flavours! i got the regular strawberry whipped cream.

Santa Monica Crepes サンタモニカクレープ 150-0001 Tokyo, Shibuya City, Jingumae, 1 Chome-16-16-8

late lunch at yomenya goemon! i had the tarako butter one and i really liked it...i think i could try buying some mentaiko from donki back home and trying it out myself..

Yomenya Goemon 洋麵屋 五右衛門 (chain store, multiple outlets)

Day 6 (18/5/2024)

conbini haul for the morning. i would like to shoutout to famima's pudding in particular; i feel a lot of store-bought pudding tend to be closer to the jelly-like consistency, but i prefer my pudding to be closer to the creamy? eggy? like consistency and famima's pudding is perfect for the price ;w;

we went to miura peninsula in kanagawa for the day using the misaki maguro ticket (it's so worth!! highly recommend if you want a day trip from tokyo). for breakfast we had some coffee and toast at coffee house poem. their signature blend (kaigan blend) in particular was really unique and nice..kinda regret not ordering that for myself 😂 love the rustic interior too!

Coffee House Poem (Miurakaigan outlet) ぽえむ三浦海岸駅前店 238-0101 Kanagawa, Miura, Minamishitauramachi, Kamimiyada-3130

nearby there's a souvenir shop selling mainly jams, and pickles (including daikon, one of miura's specialties). did you know that i hated eating radish until japanese daikon changed my life 🤣 i also got some persimmon jam to try since i'd never really heard of it! and also some honey+daikon candy.

Temiyage Iroiro Miura Store 手土産いろいろ 三浦ストア 238-0101 Kanagawa, Miura, Minamishitauramachi, Kamimiyada-3255

and finally we got SUSHI...i could cry the maguro here is so good 😭😭😭😭😭 the place is called 'kaitenzushi kaisen', but the sushi does not actually 'kaiten'/revolve, the chefs just serve it 😂 we used the maguro ticket on this so we got some maguro and some local catch!

Kaitenzushi Kaisen 廻転寿司 海鮮 238-0101 Kanagawa, Miura, Minamishitauramachi, Kamimiyada-3372-18

we then took the train to misakiguchi station, and the bus to misaki port. there's a market there called urari marche, which sells seafood and veggies mainly. we got some skewer hotate (scallop) and maguro karaage there! i was not a big fan of the maguro karaage though..i still think maguro is best as sashimi lol

Urari Marché うらりマルシェ 238-0243 Kanagawa, Miura, Misaki, 5 Chome-3-1

right next to the port was a cafe i used my ticket on, for some danish loaf with pistachio ice cream and a coffee drink. the ice cream goes so well with the fruity loaf!

3204 bread&gelato 238-0243 Kanagawa, Miura, Misaki, 3 Chome-12-10

Day 7 (19/5/2024)

went for a short walk at ueno park in the morning. there were some food stalls there! we tried some of the freshly roasted hojicha, and also some mitarashi dango. there's some skewered fish that looked good but i didn't try because i was scared of the bones 😅 and other kinda matsuri-like foods such as kakigori and yakisoba, a bit higher priced i guess because of the tourists there but i'm not a fan of yakisoba so 😆

also there was an asian food festival going on near shinobazu pond! i didn't try the food (it seemed largely SEAsian food, we can get cheaper thai, viet food etc in singapore anyway), but also for some reason there is a food truck for US food? and the representative food is 'american long potato' 😂 is that a thing in US? (ok but i know US is huge)

i met up with a friend for lunch at akiba and they recommended ootoya! a restaurant chain for teishoku. i got the recommended fried fish and veg in sweet vinegar sauce and 🥺 the taste mix is so good! i also wanted to randomly bring up something i'll miss about japan: pretty much every eatery, whether cafe or restaurant, serves free water, or even green tea! you rarely get free water in singapore eateries even though we have friggin drinkable tap water here 🙄 (except in japanese chains like saizeriya or sukiya..lol) you'll have to buy overpriced bottled mineral water or something even if you just want water to go with your meal.

Ootoya 大戸屋 (chain store, multiple outlets)

after some walking around akiba (i.e. combing weeb stores), we stopped for some thick fluffy toast and drink (mine was cinnamon toast and almond cafe latte) at vault coffee. true it was a sunday, but we were surprised that it was some random cafe hidden in third floor of what looked otherwise like a normal commercial building on the outside, and it was still soo crowded, we had to wait a little while to be seated!

VAULT COFFEE 101-0021 Tokyo, Chiyoda City, Sotokanda, 4 Chome−5−1 3F

and this marks the end of our week-long food journey in japan 😆 i had to save a lot of funds for my splurging on weeb and stationery stuff LOL, but i hope the next time i come i can focus more on sightseeing and food maybe! but for now it's back to capitalism to save up first 🏃

#garm's trip repo

[pianokantzart]

#look I know this is one of the dumbest things I've ever posted and reads like a corporate buzzfeed article #but consider: I genuinely am curious please tell me #mario movie #super mario bros #the super mario bros movie #super mario brothers #brain is latching on to Toad society tonight for some reason #It just looks so cozy. 90% of them are just hanging around with free time to spare #getting groceries and chatting with friends #Like dang... Peach be good at her job. That is an optimal society if I've ever seen one. #polls

[todayisafridaynight]

no cuz fr the most unexplainable thing would be how they didn’t reunite sooner like,,, Mine could have been staying away because he wansnt good enough for daigo (in his mind) but still i don’t think he’d stay THAT far away 💀 at most bro is down the street at any given time 😭

reviews are in for Mine Isn't Dead Actually But He Is Emo So

#snap chats #crying at the thoght of mine and daigo reuniting at the grocery #like yk when you go with your mom and she bumps into an old friend and now youre stuck in a five minute cutscene #yeah that. but your Old Friend was your one true love who you thought killed himself #and now you find out he's just working at the bar around the bend 💀💀💀 #stop whyd i remind myself of that tiktok where dudes in a coat rack and is like 'dad is this where youve been all this time' #same shit mine's booking it. hes too embarrassed too ashamed #itd be so funny if every 'dead' character did just get kidnapped by the daidoji #thats the funniest shit to come out of gaiden The Daidoji just being an excuse to bring dead bitches back #not that im complaining its 1000% hilarious as hell vjaLKAEKLJ #gonna see kiryu at the daidoji HQ and act like they dont know each ther #a-fucking-pparently since kiryu doesnt even have a memory of mine in y8 💀💀💀 #genuinely hilarious how thats so ... like no i dont think ill remember the man who tried to usurp my son who he was in love with #and he destroyed my orphanage before killnig himself right in front of me. and my son. not worth remembering at all #at least the vocational school quizzes remember mine 💀💀

[cyazurai]

I wish TS4 would give us some games that kids can play just by interacting with each other, like in 2 and 3.

Imagine the kids bonding by playing tag, or hide and seek, or an actual game of pretend instead of standing around talking, or rock paper scissors, or literally anything...

#ts4 #the sims 4 #i'm trying so hard to get my sim children to make friends #and they gotta do it by chatting like grown ups or playing on playground equipment #i made friends in grocery stores by playing hide and seek with random kids i didn't know! #please give me childhood interactions EA

[uzu-hime]

So like legit how does one make friends when they are

-too adhd for normal people

-too depressed for adhd people

-poor (no money to do things or go places)

-25 on the outside, single mom for 10+ years on the inside

-so so lonely but so so afraid of adding anyone else to the "only want to hang out with me when you need free therapy" group that includes everyone I know

#i want friends #but i don't know how to make them #or where to find them #im too weird for a lot of people and too introverted for others #and for some reason everyone i do befriend always ends up being basically my therapy patient #or they only ever want to hang out on their terms which... don't exist #side eyes my friend who always says 'i miss you guys we should hang out' in the group chat but then turns me down #for her boyfriend every single time i try to make plans #'he works night shift i have to clean during the day' girl are you his girlfriend or his maid?? #if you don't want to hang out with me just fucking tell me instead of playing cinderella all the time #my mom says i should get out more and do more things but honestly i live in bumfuck ohio #what things???? #rural america is a nightmare for being social if you don't have money and also don't want to hang out at your local high school #i can't even go to the park in town by myself because too many women have been abducted there #im not making this shit up #i just want someone to sing silly songs with me and try on stupid outfits just for fun and go to new restaurants #no one has ever heard of and sit in the woods in silence for a while and maybe take a nap together and compare grov #*grocery lists and just. #why is it so hard #what is wrong with me that the only friends i have only like me sometimes #even my mom who likes me all the time won't even go shopping with me anymore #she's too burnt out from working #maybe it's not me #maybe im just another victim of capitalist america's isolation #even then i don't know what to do about it. my cat helps but im still just. lonely. #im tired of being lonely #vent post #ignore me

[elegyofthemoon]

🧍🏻‍♂️i am too used to living on my own this was weird.

#i forgot my friend and i basically are neighbors so when i was grabbing my laundry he walked in #and we were just chatting while i was trying to finish #and it was actually kinda nice ngl sjfndjdjd #im just not used to it and i was like 🧍🏻‍♂️🧍🏻‍♂️ wh.... whats happening #people do this its the most mundane #but it felt nice jdjfjdjd #he was just catching me up on how hes doing w his studies and all #and also prepping me for my next rotation #and then before i left he was like 'omg im so excited to start next week with youuuu' #OKAY I GUESS ILL START CRYING ?????????????? COOL #he apparently said he and our mutual friend were like 'o i think snow and our director will get along' #and then he listed wHY #AND I WAS LIKE HUH............ #snow has suddenly become visible after many years of isolation wtf is going on HGBFNFDJ #snow speaks #friends tag #i love my friends but i need to stop crying about them every other day its quite the hassle #ANYWAYS it was a nice night #i had a pretty good day all things considered ^7^ #i made curry i did laundry i went out and got groceries #and i finished my first draft of something ^u^ #simple life simple pleasures myeheh

[permanentreverie]

just a quick lil rant before i head to bed

#somethin that’s really bothered me these last few days #i have one irl person that i consider my friend and i hang out with her. but if i wasn’t the one suggesting we go out and do stuff #i don’t think she’d bother with me at all #which. we have fun together. at least i do. #but thinking about this whole year. everything we’ve done has been my suggestion #and it’s not like we’ve hung out every single weekend. she’s had plenty of opportunities to invite me to stuff #but she will blatantly do stuff with her other group of friends then tell me about it #like she mentioned she went and saw the eras movie and was excitedly telling me all about it. #and damn. that’s an experience i would have loved to have. #and she KNOWS i love taylor it’s not like she thought i wouldn’t like going. #she also has openly discussed with her other friend (who is a swiftie) about getting tickets for taylor. right in front of me. ngl it just!? #hurt not to be included i guess!? i mean this isn’t the first time i’ve had a friend openly go to an artist i love with someone who’s not me #idk am i just being stupid and selfish!? #but like. during the summer (a month i was really struggling) i kept on seeing if we could meet up and talk and catch up #before this get together at the end of the month with a few people. and that never turned out she kept on saying she was busy #understandable. but the day of the get together i was chatting with her friend and she mentioned how she and her had hung out like 30 times #that month. #and like i went bowling with said friend last week (it was my suggestion) and we were hanging out and i mentioned how now that our schedules #have opened up id love to get together more - even if she was getting groceries and wanted someone to come along. and she said that yeah #that this week would be good to hang out. and i told her to just contact me. but i highly highly doubt she will text me. #so should i just take the hint and drop her!? #and i live a little farther away but i’m always the one driving to her. idk if that makes a difference but like #idk it’s just the feeling of being expendable and someone’s second choice and never their first #which is a feeling i’ve grown up with so i’m not a stranger to it #but i’ve actually lost sleep over it this last little bit wondering like what it is about me that repels people that makes them not care #like i’ve had girls i’ve loved with my whole fucking heart and would lay down my life for them and i didn’t even make their top 5. #so let’s just say this is an issue that has been hurting me for a while #idk like i’m not trying to sound emo but this kind of hurt and loneliness is just something i have to resign myself to #and face the reality that i’m not as important to people as they are to me sometimes.

[grimmgrinningghouls]

I don't see a lot of people who are also wearing rwby merch but when I do its always either "omg you watch rwby too?!" or we just stand there and stare at each other with knowing looks.

#There used to be this guy at the library by my old HS #And he'd come in every so often with the same rwby sweater as me #we'd always silently nod at each other #then there used to be some cashier lady who worked out the supermarket by my house #she had rwby pins on her vest and I refuse to leave the house without my ruby sweater at least around my waist #every time I saw her which was often we'd chat abt rwby for a few minutes while she rung up my groceries #she quit a few months ago I hope shes doing well #rwby #last time I went to a big convention back in my cosplay days we had to run to the store to get smthn really fast #was in ruby cosplay #my friend was in her fursuit without the head #as we were walking in we saw someone inblake cosplay #it was one of the few moments I truly connected with a stranger

[paradoxesofgalaxies]

Ughhhh. I overdid it yesterday bc I was feeling ok and had a lot of chores to get done. And today I had to do laundry bc I was out of clothes. Normally I'd ask my husband to help me get stuff to the laundry room (a couple building a couple half flights of stairs away) but he threw out his back the other night bending down to pet a dog (a real we're getting old moment) and he can't even stand up without his cane so I just had to do it myself.

Well both my shoulders went out and something went wrong in one of my hips and lower back (I think I bumped into something. At least, it feels that way. But I don't remember much of actually doing laundry so ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯). And I still need to go out to pick up meds, get laundry put away, and make dinner. I should probably put off folding laundry...

I can't wait until we move in November and I'll have a washer and dryer off of my bedroom. It will make doing laundry far less injury inducing.

#lots of pain #and it's too hot rn to use my heating pad #and I'll have to wait until my husband gets home for him to fix my shoulders which won't be until 1 am ;-; #oh! i just remembered! #before husband left for work we were sitting outside and I started to stand up to go grab something but he went to get and i sat back down #forgetting that I'd set my umbrella down in the chair and sat on the curved handle which fucked up my hip and lower back #ok at least that makes sense bow #*now #but fuck it hurts #maybe i can convince my partner to stop at the grocery store so i can grab something easier to make for dinner tonight #bc i don't think I'm going to be able to handle standing as much as i would need to for the meal currently planned #time to rest while I chat with friends #galactic gab #vent tw #bone fuckery

[lordsardine]

😩

#man I’m fucking exhausted #I decided in the middle of the day since my boss is off that I was finally gonna hang my curtain rods #and I’m sure I did something wrong because it was taxing as fuck but I got them up #and then I vacuumed. dusted. and mopped #then I went grocery shopping out in the fucking 7° F weather #THEN I had to break down a giant ass box and hang up a giant bulletin board my mom shipping me #and I’m finally done that 😭 #miscellaneous #I was entertaining the idea of doing a meet up tomorrow but considering the high is 17°F and it’s a hike to get there #like yeah nah #video chatting friends at least tomorrow

[lilgynt]

i do actually miss him and am upset about what happened, surprised by the former fact which like yay!!!! human connection and emotions!!!, but also damn, want to reach out but also i have way too much pride beside he didn’t like me/respect me enough not to do all that but also god damn it

#personal #he works right by my house so it’s like kay getting groceries or a hair cut i will have to look nice everytime now #like it fluctuates #like most the time i’m like okay that happened. anyway #then i get sad #then i get real angry like RIDDLES???? #in ur apology follow up you wrote she may or may not be fucking other dudes rn i care why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #but then i see him us like 17 exclamation points and get sad bc i miss that #also it’s likes oh okay he didn’t like me and is telling his friends how lame i am #or ohhhh okay he did actually like me but just wanted to get his dick wet more #i know we frequent several of the same place or his friends do and i like entertaining a little fantasy of him seeing me #chasing me down and trying to chat and then blah

[noochiarts]

#inflación #the chat my friend had the other day which I thought was annoying like we really dont care get out #karen #grocery shopping #customers #customer service #comic art #comics #web comic #mini comic

[thatdemiboymess]

Turning up the music to max volume and laying facedown on the bed because the mental health has hit rock bottom like DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT--

Thoughts of self harm and maybe suicidal ideation in the vent in the tags. Sorry.

#irl #vent #self harm mention #self harm #i am not having a good time today at all chat #my brain is giving me the itchy little localized signals in my wrists that are connected to the Bad Thoughts and Horrible Coping Mechanisms #and like honestly i feel like i should be fine but im not #shit sucks #almost started crying because i realized i forgot to grab some new exfoliating gloves while i was at the store #gonna be eating nothing but ramen and potatoes this month #im lonely and life feels like a really shitty time loop and im probably never gonna be able to get my cats and bring them here #because i need to somehow manage to save up $500 just for oet deposit and pet rent #when everything is month to month to month #i dont have any friends and i dont talk to my family and i sincerely feel like i could die and the only person that would know would be #my partner and even then thats because we live together #and when i do finally die its not like anyone will have known me #people that i should or used to be close with will find out eventually and theyll all call me by a name that isnt mine #using pronouns and words and descriptors that misrepresent me as a person #ect ect ECT #whatever #like whats even the point honestly???? #i dont know what im doing here i just feel like a huge burden to everyone around me #dssi is barely enough for groceries but its not like i can get a job near me being legally blind #im just a big ol burdensome money sink lolol #just an overly needy little waste of space #i dunno #i dont know shit anymore #im so fucking tired all the time man #im just #so tired

[mejomonster]

My mean brain is cycling on "you should look up how to find love" again. Despite knowing ill see 200 articles ive read before, 10 books ive read before, and probably 20 new ones to depress me

#rant #its the. oh ur chronically ill so even tho the book suggests going to 2-3 weekly meetups #u literally can barely get thru a workweek. an event out must be saved up for in energy and ur already using it for once a month for friends #other week for fam or grocery store trip or therapist #its the advice of OH GO ON A DATE WEEKLY UNTIL U LIKE SOMEONR despite 1 matching 10k ppl on #tinder and none of which wanted yo actually date. 2 no one ive ever liked liking me back (just dating me to idk have casual fun until #they met someonr they actually liked) so like... i cpuldnt meet 1 new person weekly to ask on a date #if i tried. 3 im demiromantic and demisexual so honestly id need 4-12 dates or week of chatting w a new person #to even DEVELOP feelings if im gonna. which means i cant do 1 new person a week #id need instead to juggle getting to know 4 for like 4 months #which i am too chronically ill to have the fucking energy flr 4 dates a week or even 1 to be frank #and i peraonally prefer to focus on knowing 1 new potential crush at a time so i would want to spend 4 months on JUST getting to know one #person. slowing down my ability to follow the advice #and then ALSO if im run ragged exhausted and bedridden from too many social outings per week #well i wont be fun to date. i wont want to date. ill be too ill to. #ill be struggling to keep mu job and doctors appts and feel worse than if i didny just date at all #ideally id like to meet new ppl i can call or text. and just chat with daily that way #and just a couple dates a monyh or more dates chilling at one of our homes #so its easier for me to not worsen my physical health #but those Choices ppl typically arent up to agreeing to until theyve DEVELOPED a CRUSH and like u enough #to be willing to compromisr and except less dates/casual hangouts more #and then again. im demiromantic and demisexual so i do NOT wanna kiss for like 3 or more months #j wont even really know if im falling for tjem for that long #and a lot of strangers may want to know if i like them MUCH sooner before being willing to do more #casual dates and less frequently. #also again just. problem uno: finding anyone who has the capacity to maybe like me and willing to go on a date #or better yet willing to BE MY FRIEND and let me take the time to see if i develop a crush #because like. if someonr will wait 3 months for me? sure lots of ppl wpuldnt. but thats step 2 #step 1 is meet anyone whod even be open to seeing if They could Like me romantically #and being chronically ill i dont have energy to go out much

[homunculus-argument]

My phone doesn't lock for some reason sometimes, and today when we popped into the grocery store, I saw something that I thought would be fun to post on tumblr with no context and took my phone out to take a picture. Pulling my phone out I discovered that I was a part of a five person video call in my friends' group chat. I immediately noped out of the conversation, which prompted protests from my friends, telling me to get my ass back into the call, they saw a glimpse of a grocery store floor and want to hear how I'm doing and see what I'm up to. What am I buying.

I explained them that I hadn't meant to join the call, my phone had unlocked itself in my pocket. They were like "yeah we know", and clarified that I hadn't accidentally joined their group call, I had accidentally called them. And four of them had just joined in on the call. This gang of feral goblins that I call my friends noticed I had called them by accident and agreed to just eavesdrop me from my pocket for shits and giggles.