#he's also like legitimately exactly what the description is so. im just saying hes Right There

[quincywillows]

anyway last thing im gonna say from my unique stan perspective is disney+ cast peyton meyer as luke literally do it he’s right there he’s disney royalty they love him just DO IT

#tp #he's the PERFECT type cast #haters can hate but i would be on board if they did that truly i would #a role with actual Depth.... would love to see him slay it! #he's also like legitimately exactly what the description is so. im just saying hes Right There #let! him! act! #maggie.txt #okay thats it that's all im saying #his agent better be on that come on fam let's work this out

[izzyliker]

hey - this is one of the mods of the bi jon project. we don't actually dislike or disagree with pan jon at all, we just want to make a project focused on and celebrating bisexuality. our carrd is a bit rambling, but frankly we were trying our best/overcompensating to try and make sure people didn't misunderstand us and do - well, this. our intentions are good, and it's really kind of disenheartening to see all the hate we've gotten for what was meant to be a positive project. (1)

you're under no obligation to answer these, but i saw some of your posts in the tag and felt like reaching out because you did give us even the tiniest bit of slack in good faith. honestly, if you have any advice about what in our carrd is so overwhelmingly bad, we'd be happy to hear it. we've been trying to respond to the overwhelming amount of criticism we've got in a positive way, and take peoples' suggestions. (2)

as for why 'no anti-antis' was at the bottom of our rules list, it's legitimately bc we were trying so hard to be preventative about this negativity that we forgot to add it when we first posted the blog, and just remembered later. again, you're under no obligation to answer these, i just feel like no one's really actually letting us defend ourselves/are taking things in as bad faith a way as possible. (3)

im not exactly sure how the posts showed up in the tag bc ive been very purposefully not tagging them, also ive blocked all of you back (not sure why you blocked me if you actually want feedback, so it seems more like you just want free positive pr and not actual feedback) so its unlikely youll see whatever it is that i reply to this but whatever. 

the issues have all been repeatedly brought up to you so i dont really see how me repeating all of them once again could help. when i last looked at the cardd the things that stood out immediately included. 

pitting ace & bi identities and people against each other REPEATEDLY,  

starting off with a guilt trippy tone and maintaining it throughout (in my experience this is the #1 best way to receive backlash because people do not want to participate in events where you feel like youre being guilted into it, which going into scrutinizing detail over there not being enough content and passing judgement onto authors or artists over it is something that comes across as guilt trippy.),

repeatedly equating asexuality with sex repulsion (not to get into the misleading information about modteam aspec identity breakdowns, since you claimed that 3/4 of the team are aspec, which is technically correct, but what you didnt say was that only one is acespec. surely you know that [allosexual] aro and [alloromantic] ace are not interchangeable) and calling using biromantic over bisexual a “misunderstanding” of the identity as if how to define romantic vs sexual attraction (how to divide, if or if not to divide, use interchangeably different labels) isnt a deeply personal choice ace people who experience romantic attraction make, 

claiming that bisexual jon is canon (he isn’t. this is why people are suspicious of anti-other mspec identities sentiments. which theyre right, if youll be so kind as to stick around til the last paragraph) and repeatedly implying that the reason there isnt “enough” content centering bi jon because the aces are simply unable to not fixate on his asexuality (again, pitting identities against each other),

making the banned ship list way needlessly confusing and including ships that dont even include jon to it, which simply comes across as some kind of a list of bad ships, idk. a way to bypass this would simply be to say “we are looking for portrayals of healthy relationships!” and that couldve just been it. if you felt that that wouldnt exclude specific ships (eg. jondaisy that a lot of people write as a relationship between trauma survivors who have done very bad things trying to get better and learning to trust each other) it is possible to simply say “the modteam is squicked[/triggered] by ships with daisy/elias/peter and we’d like to read all of the works submitted so we’re asking not to receive submissions with those ships.” hating ships is literally completely normal but making rules hard to parse is going to attract questions, especially when the implication is that ships are excluded on the grounds of morality, and a blatant power difference ship (jonelias) is equated with jondaisy, which is from what ive seen almost exclusively shown to be a relationship between equals. that makes people EXTREMELY confused about where the line is. thats why youre getting so many questions about this.  

in general the carrd was spotty, guilt trippy, and needlessly moralizing where it definitely did not need to be. the key to getting people to engage without getting backlash is to make the event seem fun. when your carrd is filled with stuff about unrelated negative stuff people are not going to think it’s a fun event at all. 

and none of this even gets into the fact that at least one of the mods has a history of open hostility against pan people. i heard through the grapevine that he has since made a fauxpology about it, but frankly it already shone through in the language used in the event descriptions. its extremely hard to take any of this is good faith when it is easy to see that one of the organizers is quite fucking clear about thinking pansexuality is biphobic and the carrd is or at least used to be full of anti-pan (and other mspec identity) dogwhistles, and is notorious in some of the tma fic author circles for being extremely fucking nasty about trans men writing fic he doesn’t like to the point of pretending that we’re all cis people (in case youre not keeping track that is misgendering us by implication) because he doesn’t like it. i think some of you (or maybe all of you? idk) in general could stand to examine whether your engagements and participations in the fandom have been at all about having fun or adding positivity to anything, or simply making posts about what other people are doing wrong. it seems that every post i see from anyone in this group is guilt trippy and authoritative, and sadly this translated directly into the event. 

when youre, say, a trans man whose first touch to one of the mods was a post about how fic where trans men have piv sex with cis men is hurting him personally and making it a moral issue and not a matter of a simple preference to the point where he feels comfortable making claims about the trans men (and transmasc nonbinary people) writing fic about trans characters re: their gender or whether theyre fetishizing trans men, your willingness to engage in good faith with an event hosted by him that features numerous red flags is not going to be unconditional. 

im sorry to hear that it has been bad for your mental health, and idk whats fucking going on with this event anymore, but my good faith interpretations have diminished significantly since i saw the shit tmc specifically has been saying about pansexual people and pansexuality as an identity label. i have no clue where the rest of you stand but tmc has repeatedly, consistently shown himself to be unable to act in good faith towards anyone other than people who agree with him.  

#disk horse #long post #Anonymous

[softer-ua]

in regards to what you pointed out a few posts ago, ngl one of my least favorite fandom things is when they make Kaminari the Har Har Stupid Joking ADHD Bi Playboy Who Is Never Serious Trope. like, he's very smart, 'worst in ___ area of a UA course' is very impressive and I don't remember if it even said that or just that he was studying with some other students, worried about his grades overall, calls himself stupid with implied insecurities about it, and didn't think he was very smart compared to the other people in the course. quirk overuse makes him loopy, incoherent, and think everything's funny. and yeah, he's a bit of a flirt and made a few perverted comments and actions that he clearly didn't think through that well. I'm pretty sure he's not ever stated to be bi in the manga because it was written by a coward, so I think people should think more about why they're associating and pairing together the idea of "hot flirty playboy who if legally able would sleep with everyone he meets" with emphasis or joke in the captions of whatever the content is on him being bi. I don't think this is inherently bad, even put together, but the execution feels kind of :/ and shallow. and I mainly just wish they'd pause to consider if there's any reason (subconscious or intentional) why one of those makes them think about the other, and at the very least lean back to see if they're blatantly making those traits centric around each other and tweak how they're showing them a little. Part of this is also because it's basically his fanon sexuality, but then they stick together "oh he's bi and everyone thinks that" and "he's made flirty or perverted comments and actions in canon at some point" and then mentally exaggerate and have this Canon Image of him as *waves hand at above* and I don't think that's happening consciously in most cases but. again. Cookiecutter Bi Party Playboy Who's Made a Date Offer to Everyone In The Building. not a flirty Person or a Playboy who is bi and flirts with more than one genders

I myself headcanon him as adhd and while the exact sexuality depends on my mood I think of/have him as bi in a lot of my content, but it's the same thing with why non adhd people see how he acts and label "adhd!" Especially about comprehension speed and derpy acting and intelligence and attention span jokes/tropes. Again, not bad in and of itself, but the specific parts of his behavior that make them think he's adhd, or that they start making jokes about or Ha Ha ADHD'ing, or that they think is why we project ADHD on him, (which they aren't necessarily wrong about, but like right in a really disrespectful look at how funny this is oh look squirrel way that's only funny when adhd people are doing it and it isn't all mocking like that) when they see other people calling him adhd, are the wrong ones, I think, and it shows in their characterization of him.

I'm not saying that any of those traits are bad in a character, but as a queer adhd girl with very high annual test scores and Gifted Kid Intelligence but extremely poor grades, focus, and brain damage (admittedly nothing like his, it was a longterm passive thing that mainly just made me have a Lot of Really Bad headaches, and closest thing it did to me was make me sluggish and emotional on bad days and also techincally have the potential kill my language bit if left untreated or the surgery messed up, which it didn't, and it won't be a problem again. but even after explaining that it wasn't cancer or any sort of tumor, and after seeing it do very little at all to affect my behavior outside of irritability and performance, because y'know, constant migraines, gone after the surgery but this was before that, Certain People I Was Vaguely Kind Of Acquaintances With started to treat my like I was a fragile glass thing going to to drop dead and revive myself speaking like a comic relief cartoon crazy person at any moment which was. patronizing.) I've since had surgery for, the way the fandom combines them into stereotypes and portrays them really just rubs me the wrong way- "Flirty Bi(tm) Playboy" "Har Har ADHD Can't Focus Or Get Things After They're Explained To Him, He's Still Confused And An Idiot" "Stupid Person With Brain Damage Who Can't Take Care Of Or Think For Themself And Acts Stupid And Funny For People To Laugh At" which tbh is super ableist even and especially when people irl do fit that description, and also reminds me of the Autistic Person Freaking Out And Being Dramatic sense of humor. And I know it's not helped by canon, because it done for comic relief and to limit his powers, but explored more I think it as a limitation could have been used way more interestingly than canon did and also call me biased but that quirk induced brain frying sounds at least as concerning as Izuku's quirk's backlash.

And it's a shame!! Because he's so much more interesting than that! Instead, the fandom gives me the Cookicutter Funny Bi ADHD Flirt Who's An Idiot and I am sad about it.

tbh it reminds me of what happened to percy jackson, esp with the ADHD Idiot Trope thing. which sucks because apparently it originated in the author making up stories around characters like his adhd and dyslexic kid inspired by Greek myths to tell him after running out of actual myths because it was his special interest and he wanted more. and then the series got kind of all over the place and the fandom processed that the adhd and dyslexic main character who does dumb things sometimes but is very combat smart and great at strategizing and leading gets bad grades and has trouble focusing and has, y'know, adhd, and made him the ADHD Idiot and erased his Gifted Kid girl friend's traits and ADHD and dyslexia into No Nonsense Calls Him an Idiot And Thinks He's Stupid And Has To Tell Him What To Do And Manage His Life For Him and honestly that just kind of sucks and it reminds me of what happened to fandom Kaminari. and now that I think of it people have jirou like that around him a lot too.

im fine with you answering this publicly if you want or have something to add but probably tag as ableism and maybe a biphobia mention content warning for people who don't have the energy to deal with thinking about those kinds of negative things rn because I kind of Went Off About It

I love this! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and experiences 💚(and double thank you for tag suggestions)💚

I couldn’t agree more that a lot of fandom has messed up Kami’s character, which is why I’ve kinda been posting more about him cause he’s just stuck in my head.

I think a lot of fandoms have trouble with characters like this, people have a hard time with duality in characters and fast/fun posts are easier to make if you flatten a character down.

The did it to Kami, they did it to Percy, they did it to Ron Weasley, they do it to Thor, the list goes on. If being the Smart One ™️ isn’t your thing and you can be goofy than you get pigeonholed into the idiot trope.

I feel for Kami a lot(probably because I have adhd/brain damage too)

It sucks when you’re smart but it’s not the traditional, measurable kind of smart(even if by national comparison Kami technically is).

I got terrible grades growing up, and I pretty much got the absolute lowest gpa you can get and still graduate. But absolutely no one would have known if I didn’t tell them, because I’m not dumb.

(It’s okay if you are “dumb”, I love me a head empty just vibes friend. You’re 100% valid, stil worthy of joining discussions, and should be listened to and taken seriously. This just isn’t about that tho)

I joke sometimes that I’m clever and witty but not smart, because that’s exactly what it feels like.

I have lots of thoughts and ideas that I think I articulate pretty well, I am excellent at finding the humor in things and expressing it in a way that’s funny to others too, and there is almost zero problems I can’t find a work around. And the people in my life love it, and they love to use it.

But eventually everyone in my life finds out that I’m not smart. They see the way I have to pause to Google how to calculate a tip, that I don’t know the name of all 50 states or even where to find them on a map, or I legitimately just can not spell (if you ever see a post where it looks like I used a weird word choice it’s probably because I tried 4 times and autocorrect+Google couldn’t help me and voice to text wasn’t an option)

No one ever questions my intelligence until they find out about my adhd and/or catch me struggling with it. After the mask comes off it’s like they can’t even hear me anymore, nothing I say could be true or matter because I’m now just the goofy accident prone spacy girl. My family literally calls me Spacy

And ya know what sometimes I just let people think that because it’s easier, it’s easier than explaining that I’m dyslexic and that I didn’t have a single geography/history clas until 10th grade and shocker the capital of Iowa doesn’t come up much by then. And it’s easier for me to laugh off losing my keys again than dwell on the fact that sometimes it feels like I’m losing my marbles.

And I wouldn’t be at all surprised if after this post I get a lot more “fact checkers” and push back on anything else I post.(not talking about people who want to genuinely engage,y’all are always welcome, I’m talking those people who don’t wanna look it up themselves but no longer trust me to know what I’m talking about)

Kami is a sweet brilliant boy. He’s in a nationally high ranking school, he loves the weather channel, he’s careful about his quirk that could easily hurt his friends in combat, he has a very high emotional intelligence level, he wears dorky shirts with electricity puns on them, and he pays attention to his friends and remembers a lot of little things about them.

He wants to be a hero and he takes that seriously, and the series has tried time and time again to tell y’all that smiling and laughter are an important part of that. Kami excels at this part! So what if his history grades don’t rival the top of the class, the top 5 students would struggle hard to do what Kami does.

Iida can’t relax, Momos rather shy, Todo struggles with social cues, Midoriya is canonically not funny, and jfc where to even begin with Katsuki. I’m certain they’ll all grow up to be excellent heros in their own right, but none of them are going to bring the level of joy and camaraderie that Denki can. You can’t test that into someone.

Kami also just notices people differently and has any easy way of joining in with them, he doesn’t struggle approaching Katsuki or Shinso. Sure he doesn’t hit the the nail on the head the same way Deku does but he’s the only one who has the guts and skills to try. Also he’s not that kinda friend, he’s not looking to a save these guys but pal around with them

I think Kami 100% realizes what a special case and tough nut to crack Bakugo is, I don’t think he’s just careless or too dumb realize his life’s at stake or whatever.

I think he’s purposely testing Bakugos boundaries all while trying to not be a threat to Katsukis actual ego and calling Bakugo out when he needs it in a way that not to serious. Kami knows how to be just goofy enough that he’s approachable. He’s also keyed in that the way to Bakugo is through Deku, meanwhile everyone else is stuck believing the opposite.

Kami also realized how important music is to Jiro and saw an opportunity to let her display her skills and combin the two worlds she lives, and he wasn’t afraid to get some back lash from her for it.

Like Deku Kami isn’t afraid to be uncomfortable. You really can’t teach that level of social ease, you can teach the posture and feed people a couple of lines but it’ll never hit the same. Funny approachable people have spent a lifetime learning the craft, usually out of necessity.

It’s actually what gives me the biggest adhd vibes from him, because adhd is (speculated to be) a dopamine deficiency disorder. People with adhd are constantly trying to raise their dopamine levels, and that means looking for praise and reward and nothing makes the human brain light up faster than postative human connections.

Adhd children struggle a lot with connecting with peers and often find making people laugh a fast way into people’s circles and makes it more likely people will overlook being interrupted or spaced out on.

Also adhd people are pretty much forced by their own brain structures to be genuine in all they do, low dopamine levels make it very hard to do things you don’t enjoy because there no promise of dopamine from the activity and you don’t have enough to spare, plus impulsiveness makes it really hard to not show when you do or don’t enjoy something.

I agree that Kami is also painted as overly perverted at times, he’s a little flirty but in a fun casual way but it’s not the foundation of his personality and it’s really mellowed out over the course of the series.

And while I subscribe to the bi hc from his interactions with Jiro and Shinso, we should all be very mindful that we don’t lump these characteristics together. The are separate facets of his personality that are not dependent on each other in anyway.

Kami deserves all the respect and love, I can’t wait to see our electric king again 🖤⚡️🖤

#tw ableism #ableism #tw biphobia #biphobia #softy answers #I have a sorta sad one shot about Kami and his quirks effects #should i post it?

[dragonflyxparodies]

you ruined a perfectly good fairy show is what you did

winx was so integral to my childhood that i basically came out to my best friend by going hey remember evil bloom and he went holy shit and i went yeah

and the netflix adaptation is so fucking bad it’s incredible. I thoroughly enjoyed watching it, but it is legitimate trash and i cannot get over how fucking bad it is, i love it, so i’mma share with y’all a brief description of The Batshit, for those of you who ain’t got no clue.

Winx is a magical-girl fairy show about a bunch of girls being magic and fairies and beating the fuck out of evil with the power of friendship.

The netflix adaptation is about a para-militaristic school training child soldiers during a post-zombie apocalypse (that is returning) led by Fairies Who Do War Crimes and a group of girls who are written so poorly i honestly couldn’t tell that they were supposed to be friends. every even vaguely maternalistic figure in the show is abusive. genocide is like. justified. at one point. one of the villain’s plans is to make everyone think The Grown Ass Adult that is holding her prisoner is torturing her. because...she is? and Adult is Very Upset by this. even though...she is?

it’s so fatphobic i wanna fight literally everybody on the fucking show except for Terra. it’s so homophobic that i wanna punt Dane off a cliff. Riven is somehow both a pathetic piece of shit and also one of the few characters that is likeable solely because he is blatant about being a piece of shit and everyone else pretends they aren't.

Bloom tries so hard to be a Smart Protagonist that it is Very Obvious the plot has to justify her doing the thing it just acknowledged would be stupid of her to do, because Funny? i guess? which leads to hilarious results.

there are so many plot holes and places where the show expects you to make wild leaps of logic to justify what is going on - and i don’t mean suspension of disbelief, i mean not telling you core tenets of how their magical world functions and then expecting you to go along w/their bullshit - that i have not been able to stop trying to work it out since i finished watching the show, Which Is Bad, thanks netflix.

FOR EXAMPLE:

the magic zombies are supposed to be soldiers from a thousand-year forgotten army. presumably they’ll be revealed to be from domino or whatever they call bloom’s homeworld, right? which means...there’s a finite number of them? but that’s never brought up. apparently a whole metric fuck ton of them were killed prior to the start of the show, but there’s no math and its frustrating.

also; they imply that magic zombies multiply by infecting pple, because people get infected and die and it is Very Bad. except apparently not? my best guess is they didn’t wanna commit to that until s2 for Drama purposes, but fuck you netflix. also also, they seem to operate by vampire standards, a la kill the one that infected you and you live/return to normal. which further implies an Actual Infection. But no.

also also also also the Fairy War Crimes were committed against a civilian town. except then we’re told that the civilian town wasn’t fairy, but humans who used magic. which holy shit that’s p cool, witches haven’t been brought in yet right so that’s gotta be it, right? except no, these were Bad witches, because they were Blood Witches. Except we never find out what exactly blood witches do, because they expect the scary name to automatically mean evil. once characters find out the civilian town was Just A Blood Witch Town they all go oh okay the war crimes are fine then. every. single. one. of. them. the blood witch thing is also told by a character who is obviously lying, because it Does Not Make Sense in context of their Evil Plan or other Evil Characters. but no its fine don’t worry about it.

also they cut tecna but still spent a good chunk of runtime talking about fucking instagram and how tech works at the school, so fuck them.

season two is going to be an Umbridge Plotline, by the way, if it ever happens, and holy shit i cannot even.

i have so much more to say about This Shit but like sweet mother cucumbers i have a memo im supposed to be researching

#winx #fate winx club #rant #netflix #it fucking sucks #it's so bad #it's genuinely incredible #fatphobia tw #genocide tw #i say fuck a lot #spoilers #winx spoilers

[acioo]

pls post the description for all of the tropes im in LOVE

ur lucky i just sent them to a groupchat i have em ALL. okay under the cut because there’s twenty !

camila mendes as hbic: i suppose this is because of her character in riverdale, but can have you considered ever... making your own character and not stealing someone elses ? if i see another one of these i will legitimately lose it. stop being BORING.

gay stoner harry styles: i'm gonna be SUPER real with you. if you're playing gay stoner harry styles, you're probably an ex larry ( or you're still a larry but in secret ). you're still trying to push that agenda, but really no one wants it. your character probably wears flowery shirts under a leather jacket. sometimes dickish but usually ~soft~ STOP doing harry dirty like this i beg of you. he doesn't deserve this treatment.

jacob elordi is a mean asshole who can't hold a relationship but CAN have a one night stand: so i guess YOU watched euphoria ? we ALL know he looks a lot better with the short haircut than his kissing booth hair but honestly, in terms of Hottest Man there is a better option. like, any other option, actually. if you think he is the pinnacle of attractiveness, you have another thing coming.

ariana grande whos either a bitch or the sweetest: and always bland and intolerable ! maybe... maybe... just don't play ariana grande at all. there's so many fcs with so much more range. every time an ariana grande writes i imagine it in ariana grande's baby voice and i can't deal with it.

tarjei sandvik moe as soft uwu gay: first off, he's not attractive. second off, HE IS MORE THAN ISAK VALTERSEN. also says a lot that people will play him and not IMAN MESKINI. SAYS A LOT. also, isak valtersen is not even soft uwu. he is a SNAKE ( and i like that about him, but IT'S TRUE ).

kat mcnamara / sophie skelton / madelaine petsch / luca hollestale as any canon redhead: ginny weasley or lydia martin or clary fray or rachel elizabeth dare or pamela isley or lily luna potter or kim possible or jean gray or barbara gordon - WHOEVER IT IS, I'M TIRED OF IT. PLEASE DO ANYTHING ELSE. DO A FC WITH NON RED HAIR, IT DOESN'T MATTER. JUST DON'T USE THEM.

super sweet lily james: exhausting. that's all i have to say about this.

badass danielle rose russell: so you watched legacies, huh ? like, she's very cool and very pretty, but she is not the pinnacle of that. usually, some kind of tragic backstory comes with it ( a la hope ) and some powers that are just a bit ridiculously powerful. maybe get some creativity.

dove cameron princess type: you make me SICK. disgusting.

emma mackey as punk edgelord: i understand you saw pink hair and went " ah, yes, " but maybe people are MORE THAN THAT ???? and maybe you SHOULD THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX ??? she's a fun fc. she has sad eyes. do SOMETHING.

15 year old matthew daddario: c'mon, dude. JUST C'MON. WHAT IS UP WITH THAT??? he's a grown adult. a GROWN ADULT. and people always lust after him, WHICH MAKES IT EVEN WEIRDER. he doesn't even look that young, he looks his AGE DEAR GOD.

madeline petsch is mean: kickass sassy madelaine petsch who is exactly cheryl blossom, but for Some Reason, always straight. for some reason. FOR SOME REASON. one day you will pay for your crimes and god will not be so kind.

sensitive kristen froseth: whether you saw sierra burgess, or looking for alaska, or the society doesn't matter. she has The Range. she really does. you just aren't playing it.

lana condor is quirky: i'm also guilty of this i WILL ADMIT IT but maybe... consider a world in which you did not watch to all the boys i loved before. you're knock off is NOT lara jean covey and they never will be.

noah centineo as a dumbass: he is a dumbass, both on and off-screen, so... you got at least THAT one thing right. everything else, however-

funny dad type andy samberg: he is not jake peralta, please get over this. PLEASE. the ONLY acceptable andy samberg fc is when he's used as peter parker in into the spiderverse.

bitchy phoebe tonkin: phoebe tonkin that always has a witty comeback and probably a tragic prom queen by molly kate kestner style background. she's a very fun fc and you ARE RUINING HER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU'RE RUINING HER! !!!!!!!   !!!!!!

nina dobrev as either katherine pierce or elena gilbert: nina dobrev is always played EXACTLY like one of her the vampire diaries characters, usually a mix of elena and katherine. the personality is always like loyal sweet best baby girl who is also a Bad Bitch but sensitive deep down. the characters weren't good on the vampire diaries. they won't be good anywhere else, either.

alexa demie is sexual and mean: you said " all latinas are sexual " and it REALLY shows. also, you saw euphoria, probably. it's not only boring, it's honestly fucked up.

tom holland as a nerd: i'm sorry but you will NEVER compare to peter b. parker and that's that. please do not even try.

#answered #rpt #kimtaehyugn

[hereticbones]

now that I've finished worm:

rachel started off as one of my favourite characters and progressively got better, i love her, the end.

i would die for dragon but i didnt like/am 2 stupid for her epilogue. and also feel slightly weird about the housewife-ish-ness of it. give me more dragon/defiant/weaver super vigilante family.

im ambivalent about lisa and grue for the most part. i feel like i should be sold on lisa but im... not...

i liked aisha from the moment she's introduced purely defensively because Taylor's description of her was so... classically horribly judgmentally Taylor. and then she turned into a legitimately fantastic really funny + tragic character. that last non epilogue arc man FUCK.

ok so speaking of that arc..... fuck. that fucked me right up. khepri got me fucked up. when the crowd is hugging and celebrating and she thinks theyre murdering each other? fucked me up. when tattletale BLOWS HER A KISS and she doesnt recognize it.... fucked me up. when rachel succeeds in communicating with her when no one else can after all the time taylor spent learning to communicate with rachel??? FUCKED ME UP.

Dragon running her fingers thru her hair when khepri realizes she's forgotten how to read?!?! you guessed it FUCKED me UP

ahem. tbh i wasnt super invested in the last 1/3-1/4 of the story until those last few arcs. the whole jack/theo/end of the world stuff. mostly because i couldnt keep the characters straight.

but then...khepri.... FUCKED ME UP

erm.

other things i didnt like: how weirdly firmly WoG and canon insisted that taylor was straight after the first few arcs when she was accidentally written kiiiinda bi. related: um... isnt amy kind of... an Evil Lesbian? i have not seen any commentary on this which is a bit funny since ppl argue about literally everything else about amy. i mean there's other gay characters but like... her whole schtick sort of manifests as...you know what the more i think abt this the less i wanna previcate. she literally is motivated by her gay love to do an awful terrible thing. sure theres mitigating factors and tons of ppl find her a blameless or almost blameless character but lbr she does something atrocious because she's in love. shrug emoji seems bad.

also iirc of the main chars regent MAY be bi but is EXPLICITLY a rapist so yknow. coughfuckthatcough. aaand as much as i love lily and sabeh they are definitely secondary characters. legend might be an extremely important person in-fiction but in the story he's uh... not.

also circus? being some kinda trans? i think there was good intentions there but it was just... weird... and uncomfortable.... I'd have to reread that bit to see exactly what was said but i definitely remembering feeling unpleasant.

over all no worse than any str8 fiction but ive seen some ppl praising it for being diverse and uh... nnnnot..... exactlyyyy what I'd say.

i really really loved taylor as a protagonist. she was such an damn fuckup and also... terrifying. i loved how rational she thought of herself when she was actually.... not that. at all. what a great example of an unreliable narrator. and also a hypercompetent protagonist despite also being a walking disaster. i loved how all the protagonists were motivated by trauma and how if u werent traumatised u were basically untrustworthy.

i didnt like Taylor's obsession with physical appearance. i understand how it was supposed to be a consequence of her bullying but 1) i just feel weird when she references having no curves/boobs. thats weird. idk. and 2) have a protagonist who is self concious of their looks be actually fat or something u cowards. give her acne. fucking do it.

the writing was damn good 95% of the time. the other 5% is pretty excusable considering how fast and how much wildbow wrote holy shit.

something that i couldnt stop thinking about and that i wish wasnt a bit watered down by the end when nearly everyone was using it was that our narrator adopts the term "passenger" from bonesaw. she picked it up while uh... going thru something p damn traumatizing even if the focus is on what grue went through. every time she used the word "passenger" i remembered that it was bonesaw's word and i wondered if taylor did to.

kid win's chapter about having superpowers + adhd was p well researched and good and i liked getting to see him being awesome and sucessful later on. he wasnt my favourite ward but his bit was Real Good.

the action was p good. the tension was top notch. the characters were the stars. the romances were.... fine. sometimes i wish things were spelled out more. sometimes the obtuseness was just right.

and it is in the end now my favourite superhero story.

and im yawning and sleepy and im sure ill think of a dozen more things but w/e

#hoping i rememvered how to readmore on mobile right #not tagging cos #shrug #sooo no one will read this but thats ok its mostly fr me #worm spoilers

[uniformbravo]

uhh first day of school post

it was fucken hot

seriously why did it have to be 110 degrees right on the week when i start having to go outside again bye

every semester the first thing i say is “i’m never taking an 8 am class ever again”

the second thing i say is “i’m never taking a class on the third floor ever again”

this semester, somehow, through a cruel twist of fate, i have ended up failing both resolutions with two classes each (two classes are at 8 am; two classes are on the third floor; one of them is at 8 am on the third floor)

((i only have 3 classes, there is overlap in the above description))

painting class was cool the teacher was cool i have to pick between oils & acrylics by next tuesday & i have no idea what i want to do

it was super awkward the whole time bc i sat next to this girl & then a couple other girls came in and sat on the other side of me and it was very clear they all knew each other and i could tell the first girl wished she was sitting w/ them but i was too nervous to offer to switch bc there was never a time that felt right so i just spent the whole class feeling like i was in the way so that wasn’t very.... fun

second class was intermediate drawing & ok

this guy is fairly new to teaching, says he graduated calarts a few years ago, and he seems nice & everything but i got the distinct impression that he doesn’t really know how to run a class

which is totally fair since he’s so new to it

but our first assignment is to “revisit” the final from the last art class we took & basically do it again???

not like a literal recreation of exactly what we did last time, he said he wanted us to like do it differently? have more fun with it?? add our own interests into it??? make it represent ourselves????

the more i think about this the more questions marks happen

he did not explain it well

he said he wants to use this to kind of gauge where everyone is at in terms of skill level, but couldn’t he just have done that by having us....... actually...... you know......... bring in our finals from the previous classes........................ instead of having us redo it....................................

this is literally the final project we’re talking about, the big thing that’s due at the end of the semester, the thing we were each given weeks to work on, and when does he want this in by? 

wednesday

as in 2 days from now

wednesday

and we were all like “uhhhh can we have some time to work on it in class”

and the thing is, he didn’t even have a set due date, he’s treating this class like a democracy so whenever we were like “so wait when do you want this by” he’d be like “idk what do you guys think?” like i dont know dude!!! you’re supposed to have this shit figured out, we don’t know the scope of the assignment we don’t know the amount of work that should go into it, we don’t know how long it’s going to take, that’s supposed to be on you!! what the hell,

the whole thing was very

unclear

we were all trying to figure out what the fuck he wanted from us and as soon as it started turning into “yeah just bring it in by wednesday” we were all like panicking like “you want a finished recreation of our last class’ final project in two days” so we managed to amend it so we’d have the first half of wednesday’s class to work on it but still jesus??? the whole thing ended with him saying “just bring in a drawing on wednesday, does that sound good?” uh no not really 

u want to gauge our skill level but ur only giving us 2 days to show it

buddy ur getting a pencil sketch of an idea that could be cool if i had more time to like refine it n shit

also just because i want to reiterate: if u wanted to see our current skill level why didnt u just have us bring in some of our previous works

like what the fuck

what

aaanyway despite all my complaining i think this could be an.... interesting class??? this is for intermediate drawing by the way, which is the class that i was like “boy i hope this is more interesting than beginning drawing” and hoooo

he said he wants to focus heavily on “conceptual art”, u know, art that has meaning n shit, he explained it as having something to say about the world or something like that, which is. cool i guess. the main thing i kinda latched onto was when he said he wanted to make the class enjoyable for everyone and have us doing drawings we’re interested in, so if the class can follow through on that promise then i’ll be good to go but if he pulls a “every drawing has to have some deep meaning and commentary on the world around us” then i will be. unhappy

i dont even know if he actually does drawings?? i mean he’s from calarts so obviously he has to have done art for that but like when someone asked if he’s gonna show us some of his work he was basically like “um yeah, but i don’t really have a lot, im more into exploring ideas for art than actually making it” and he said he’s into performance art so it’s like. that’s really cool & im happy for you but just curious why are you teaching a drawing class then. like a legitimate actual question tho, how does this class relate to what you do and how u gonna teach us if ur not putting these things into practice yourself

i realize im being kinda harsh because i only spent maybe a little over an hour in this class today so this is really just first impressions talk, like. i could be hugely underestimating him, maybe he is a fantastic teacher and i’ll have a lot of fun with this class??

but even as i type that im remembering other things he said, like how the assignments aren’t gonna be like in other classes where you’re told specifically what to draw or like how the lecture portions are gonna be like a seminar where we discuss art-related topics

it’s just super unconventional and it seems really experimental on his part like he really doesn’t know what he’s doing (which, again, understandable since he’s new and all) so it’ll probably just end up being the weirdest art class i’ve ever taken

and a couple years ago i’d probably have really really hated it just based on the lack of guidance alone, i could see a genuine complaint of this class being “it doesn’t feel like the next step after all the technical work and learning we did in beginning drawing”

but at this point im really intrigued and willing to give it the benefit of the doubt, and i’d rather treat it like an experience than a poorly structured class

and maybe that’s easier for someone in my situation to do since i didn’t really care all that much about this class in the first place so i didn’t have any expectations for it to meet anyway

im literally just taking it to fill my requirements so if it turns out to be an interesting experience then all the better, as long as i can pass

Side Note About The Grading, By The Way

the syllabus has a grading system listed

an A is described as “outstanding work, which exceeds guidelines of assignments, shows technical prowess, creativity, expression, intelligence and personal growth”

a B is “high quality work which meets the guidelines of the assignment”

like is it just me or shouldn’t the latter description be just fine to receive an A??? u did what u were supposed to and it was “high quality” like that is. the definition of an A assignment, the first description should be for an A+ like legitimately is this just me or

and then for a D it’s like “poor quality, little effort or understanding of the assignment” the “understanding” part is throwin me off like if the student didn’t understand the assignment then maybe u should explain it better for them?? i can see poor quality and low effort being good reasons for a low grade but not understanding seems a little unfair

im just getting into specifics now tho

i think im done talking abt this class now

hoo boy

an interesting first day to say the least

#''first day of school post'' or as i like to call it ''immediately complaining about my classes after just one (1) day'' #retag later #today posts #school / #sorry i've been making so many school posts i just #need to let it out somewhere #also i love talking abt myself & my life :)

[preservationandruin]

Part Four: Storm’s Illumination

Update! I downloaded the nook app, killed my phone’s storage, and have accepted that reading too much on this will fry my already-bad eyes. 

But, on the plus side, I can read more WoK. 

Point of views back out to be Dalinar, Kaladin, Adolin, and Navani for this section. Featuring Dalinar deciding not to do a stupid thing but to keep trusting Sadeas, the fact that Dalinar isn’t hallucinating, Kaladin learning about his powers, and Dalinar and Navani finally smooching. Also, this is really fucking long, my apologies. 

We start seeing the epigraphs be death rattles again. Meanwhile, Adolin has realized that trying to get his father to see that he’s going mad has resulted in Dalinar deciding to abdicate in favor of Adolin--which is not what Adolin wanted at all. You done fucked up, Adolin. 

Dalinar has another vision, where he sees the Recreance--the Shardbearers giving up their swords. Interestingly, he also feels the hurt and betrayal of the spren: “A terrible feeling struck him. A sense of immense tragedy, of pain and betrayal. [...] What was happening? What was that dreadful feeling, that screaming he swore he could almost hear?” Also, the blades were glowing, but they dimmed and dimmed over time--the spren dying. Yikes. 

So there’s a big hint as to what the Shards actually are. And one of the Radiants--probably Tanavast taking their shape, although it’s hard to tell and it could be a former Bondsmith or something--tells Dalinar that the Night of Sorrows, True Desolation, and Everstorm are coming, and to read the book and “unite them.” 

Ren’s also having either a panic attack or an epileptic moment--all Dalinar classes it as is “an episode of weakness” but he’s pale, his legs are shaking, and he immediately sits down and rests his head in his hands. 

...I wonder when Renarin started awakening his powers, as a note. Also Renarin accepts the Old Magic as existing easily, while Adolin claims it’s a myth (Dalinar shuts that down). 

Adolin and Dalinar start fighting about whether or not Dalinar should step down and Renarin interrupts with “uh...guys...we could, like test to see if the visions are legitimate or not??” and both of them are like “?????” 

So they decide to have Navani write down the visions as Dalinar sees them, because they know they can trust her and their first choice--Jasnah--isn’t there. 

“The visions had told him to trust Sadeas” DALINAR NO

Navani is going out of her way to help Adolin with his flirting attempts she’s such a good aunt I love her. Also it gets him out of the room so Navani and Dalinar can talk privately. 

Navani tries yet again to convince Dalinar they can be together but Dalinar is a bit too tired and confused and uncertain to be able to do this right now, which she recognizes and does leave.

Back to Bridge Four!!! They’re on another bridge run, and Dunny dies--hit by two arrows and trampled by horses. Moash has to pin Kaladin down to stop him from running out after the kid which, thank god Kaladin has some people who are willing to act as his self-preservation. And so instead of helping Dunny, he goes around and tries to heal Bridgemen from other crews. 

Kaladin is too good and pure. He’s just furious that nobody cares about the dead Bridgemen. 

Kaladin runs off of righteous anger and like, coffee, probably. 

Anyway he fucking tears the Bridge Four gang a new one when they refuse to help someone from another bridge because people from other bridges were mean to them--and in the process states that his father was the only man with honor that he ever knew. 

Listen, this is why Kaladin is dangerous--he cares about everyone, that makes them surprised and grateful, especially on the bridge teams where nobody gives a shit about anybody, and then they become slightly more loyal to him. And then suddenly he has like, an army of loyal people. 

He’s such a hufflepuff. 

Also Teft is dropping the world’s least subtle clues here like “wooow its so weird we keep not getting hit....funny that that happens when you run point...just keep carrying lit spheres with you......they’re good luck....oh they went dun again wow that’s so strange kaladin” 

Meanwhile, Kaladin’s own grazed arrow wound is completely gone, and he’s getting a little freaked out. 

Another death rattle: “the burdens of nine become mine. Why must I carry the madness of them all? Oh, Almighty, release me.” This is absolutely Taln (or, uh, whichever of them is the one who was left behind). 

Dalinar’s at a feast again, and Wit isn’t there--Dalinar notes it’s probably because he doesn’t want to become predictable. Also Dalinar notes that noblewomen competing to draw the same person has the same social function as duels between noblemen, although they don’t use the same word. Wit does show up, just casually sitting next to Dalinar--and Dalinar notes that Adolin’s judgement of Wit was more accurate than his was. 

I gotta say, Adolin is hella perceptive. I’ve said it before, I know, but he’s a smart kid. 

Wit quietly--and accurately--depicts the relation between Dalinar and Sadeas:  “The foolishness of men who care, Dalinar, and the brilliance of those who do not. The second depend on the first--but also exploit the first--while the first misunderstand the second, hoping that the second are more like the first.” 

Also Wit ponders if you can pull a person apart and put him back together into something else “Like a Dysian Aimian” (but also, unsaid, like a Radiant.) This whole conversation is Wit trying to gauge exactly how much Dalinar knows--possibly because Wit doesn’t know exactly what Tanavast is telling Dalinar. Interesting. 

Sadeas is going to pull Some Bullshit (as always) and Elhokar is getting more and more paranoid, so all of that is interesting. 

Dalinar voice: Sadeas is going to cause Bullshit re: the investigation so I’m just going to go up and ask him about it. 

I’m not sure if this is a good or a bad idea but regardless it’s going to possibly throw Sadeas off. Unfortunately, Sadeas’ plan is to lull Dalinar into a false sense of security--claiming the most likely suspect is someone who dislikes Dalinar. 

Adolin cannot fucking believe that Sadeas is exonerating Dalinar (which, again, Adolin should stick to his intuition that Sadeas is a sneaky bastard). So Dalinar and Sadeas start plans to ally, which of course GOES HORRIBLY WRONG DALINAR DON’T TRUST SADEAS. 

Skar, about Amaram: Were you with him when he won his shards? Kaladin, quietly, but with great internal salt: No. Nobody was. 

BECAUSE AMARAM DIDN’T FUCKING WIN ANY SHARDS HE STOLE THEM LIKE A FUCKING ASSHOLE I HATE AMARAM SO MUCH

Rock: You can’t fucking swallow a broam Moash: I bet I can Kaladin: Don’t do that, because if you do that, you will die

Kaladin as Bridge Four’s tired Team Mom is very real

Also Moash is still showing signs of wanting to go too far--a la “we could just take everything” until Kaladin shuts that down for being stupid and likely to get them caught. Moash isn’t a tactical thinker. 

Also Kal baits Rock into revealing that he can use a bow and arrow. 

Rock: that shot is nearly impossible

Rock: effortlessly makes the shot

Dalinar is trying to figure out Parshendi gender. “The clean-shaven ones didn’t have much in the way of breasts” weLL IM PRETTY SURE THEYRE NOT MAMMALS so THANK GOD. But Dalinar has noticed that the fighting pairs are usually a man and a woman, and also wonders why in six years of fighting nobody thought to investigate what gender their opponents were. 

I mean, honestly, given how much we depersonalize our enemies, I can believe that. 

And Dalinar’s having problems with the Thrill again. Notably, it doesn’t make him a less effective fighter--it just cuts off the bloodlust and glee. 

Dalinar literally saves Sadeas’ fucking life and later in the book Sadeas repays him by leaving him and Adolin to die. 

To quote a D&D show I watch, SOME PEOPLE HAVE NO SENSE OF FUCKING HONOR. 

Descriptions of the thrill remain disturbingly...sexual, almost. At least in the sense that the vocabulary we have to describe a visceral glee and desire tends to be reminiscent of sexual language. (”He nearly choked on it, the joy, the pleasure, the desire. The danger.”)

Sadeas: tonight, all of my soldiers will feast as if they were lighteyes Me, full of salt: BET THAT DOESN’T INCLUDE THE BRIDGEMEN YOU COLOSSAL ASSHOLE

Another bridgeman has died and Kaladin is not taking it well. Gaz didn’t come to the bridge run--he might have deserted by this point. Kaladin also notices that the Parshendi revere their dead. Kal also still doesn’t believe that Dalinar is as good as people say he is. 

And Teft just got Kaladin to inhale stormlight and use it instinctively, leading to him glowing. Kaladin is lowkey freaking out about having the powers of the Radiants. 

Kaladin and Hoid are interacting for the first time and it’s great. We also get the story of a group of people who would kill any who did something wrong because the emperor wouldn’t tolerate it, and then discovered the emperor was dead all along and had to live with the guilt of knowing that those murders were on their hands, not the emperor’s. 

...which could be a metaphor for all of Vorinism learning that Honor is dead. Or not. As with most things with Hoid, it’s very ambiguous. Also, Syl doesn’t like Hoid, which is understandable. I can see an Honorspren thinking he was strange and wrong. 

Kaladin, thinking, also realizes that his “Emperor” is the apathy--the belief that he can’t change anything. He holds onto that instead of looking for other reasons things could be happening, or acknowledging that he can change things. 

And so he decides to actually start working with and using his powers. 

Honestly from the point of anyone else this story is lowkey ridiculous like “yeah a slave turned out to be a new radiant and so his team of bridgerunners helped him train in the chasms and literally nobody noticed, really” in-universe it makes sense because nobody pays attention to the bridgemen but still you have someone who CAN FLY

A death rattle mentions “Re-Shephir, the Midnight Mother, giving birth to abominations with her essence, so dark, so terrible, so consuming.” Another of the unmade? Hard to tell. 

Adolin is talking to Jakamav, who I unfortunately can only ever see as a fratbro. On the other hand, that’s not an inaccurate interpretation. Adolin is also casually Judging other people’s fashion choices someone let this boy dress in the pretty clothes he wants to dress in instead of his uniform

Also Adolin is grumbling about how other people always want dark hair, which he thinks is stupid. He also claims he forgot that Humility existed, which is probably true. 

Also Jakamav’s girlfriend insulted Dalinar and Adolin is just. ready to FIGHT. 

“Adolin liked to be familiar with a large number of people, but not terribly close with any of them.” That’s just interesting. He’s only really close with his family, especially Renarin, at this point. 

Also, Adolin starts to see the purpose behind the Codes--he starts to see that it’s not just about pure practicality, but also about treating war and the death that comes with it with a measure of seriousness, and also giving people commanders they can trust. It’s about the importance of symbols. 

Dalinar is reciting the Way of Kings to Sadeas and Elhokar, who don’t really get it. We also get “all save the Heralds themselves must dine with the Nightwatcher,” implying that she’s seen as some sort of death entity. 

Also, Dalinar is me:  “And you have this entire passage memorized?”  “I likely got a few of the words wrong”  “Knowing you, that means you might have forgotten a singled “an’ or ‘the.”  Also Sadeas does give Dalinar the honest advice that literally nobody else naturally talks like him, so other people assume he’s putting it on as a self-righteous act (...again, Dalinar, I feel you on that one.) 

Dalinar is staring at Navani again. And Sadeas is judging people’s fashion sense now. 

Time for Adolin to crush it in the duelling ring. Also the line “And so Adolin--in a moderately subtle move” is killing me like. Welp. It was moderately subtle which is the best we can expect from him. Anyway, Adolin obviously just annihilates his opponent, because Adolin is incredible. 

“They’re trying to kill me,” Elhokar said softly, huddling down in his armor. “They’ll see me dead, like my father.”   Highprinces: Look we made a strong king Me: Look at what you did to him! he has anxiety!!!

I retain a soft spot for Elhokar. And he mentions seeing “Symbols, twisted, inhuman” in mirrors--sounds a lot like Cryptics. I almost wrote Cryptids. Wonderful. And Elhokar and Sadeas bully Dalinar into using Sadeas’ fast and costly bridges--which Kaladin later takes as a sign of Dalinar not having as much honor as people say, if I remember right. 

Also, Dalinar’s opinion on fights: “When you won, it was always better to win quickly and with extreme advantage.” Amen to that. 

Kal’s trying to intentionally inhale stormlight now. And we get Teft’s explanation of the Words, which i like, although one of them is pretty much word-for-word “Dying is easy, young man, living is harder” from Hamilton. 

And now, Bridge Four is being put on Bridge duty every single day, which is just the brightlords flat-up wanting them killed. “Consider it an...honor” they say, and Kaladin has to stop himself from swearing. He also learns that he has to inhale the Stormlight in, he can’t just...will it inside of him. 

And Kaladin forms the “parshendi carapace” idea to protect them. We also get some examination of Kaladin’s agnosticism. 

Also he tried to walk on a wall and fell on his ass, nice going Kaladin. 

But he’s getting the hang of having a lot of power and exploiting that to smuggle things out of the chasms. Including surviving a 40-foot fall. 

Back to Dalinar and Adolin, Dalinar has decided not to abdicate. Navani is also the one most aware of Elhokar’s weakness, while Dalinar still denies it. Also, Renarin is fascinated by Navani’s fabrials. So am I--fabrials are really cool. 

And Dalinar is talking with Nohadon in his vision. Also, Navani realizes he’s speaking, instead of gibberish, an ancient dialect of the Dawnchant. Which Dalinar doesn’t know, and thus can’t have hallucinated--the visions are genuine. 

Navani is realizing she might have just figured out how to translate the Dawnchant, which is also incredible. 

Navani and Dalinar are, yet again, alone, and Dalinar is even like “Navani you’re doing it again” and Navani is just like. yep. you caught me. Also she explains that being the old queen basically means she’s placeless in the world and everyone only sees her as the wife of a dead man, and she’s furious seeing it from Dalinar as well, who knew her even before Gavilar did. 

And so Dalinar kisses her because of course he does. There are even passionspren. And then she starts talking business and important things but Dal is also like, distracted because holy shit she’s so pretty aaaaa which, is, relateable, i too cannot function around pretty people. 

Also, multiple notes that the marriage between Gavilar and Navani might not have been the best--Navani notes she had reason to be unfaithful even though she wasn’t, and starts saying something that Dalinar cuts off. 

Also Navani is very smug about the fact that Dalinar kissed her first. Dalinar tries to claim that he was seduced. “What? Seduced?” She glanced back at him. “ Dalinar, I’ve never been more open and honest in my life.”  “I know,” Dalinar said, smiling. “That was the seductive part.” 

This is such a Good Ship

Anyway back with the bridgemen Moash just wants to flat-up attack Sadeas’ army and Kaladin is like. Nope. No. If we do that we will die. 

Yep, Dal is using the bridges again. I can’t remember if this is the time with the Tower or not. I’m on around the 900th page, so maybe? 

“a one-armed herdazian is still twice as useful as a nobrained Alethi. Plus, so long as I’ve got one hand, I can still do this” and then Lopen just flips off the army i love him. 

Also a soldier tries to take their water and Kal is ready to fight them. The soldier is like I don’t want to wait for our water crews and Kaladins like wow that’s too bad for you, and the soldier looks like he’s going to hit him and the entire fucking Bridge 4 gang forms up like buddy, if you punch Kaladin we’re going to have a Problem. 

The soldiers who aren’t assholes are even like, nice. 

Kaladin voice: oh god i hope they don’t notice that was a spear fighting formation WHOOPS And its time for operation Parshendi Armor. 

So everyone targets Kaladin, who can fucking dodge shit and surgebind, and not the bridges. Booyeah. All of bridge four is now yelling at him because of course they are. Matal, who is in charge of the bridges, threatens to have Kaladin strung up and Kaladin’s like yeah bc that worked so well for you guys last time. 

And Dalinar noticed that Parshendi archers were targeting Kaladin’s group and went in to save them. Dalinar is Good. And he even raised his Blade to salute Kaladin. So this time wasn’t the Tower, but that’s got to be the next full Bridge run we get. We’re close, now. 

Although Shen took this badly. Of course--these are the bodies of his people. But at the same time, Kaladin literally needs to do this to keep them all alive. All the choices here are bad, but this was the least bad. Kaladin also is trying to work out the logistics of leaving, realizing that staying is untenable, but leaving is impossible. Somehow they discount the possibility “Dalinar Kholin recruits you as a personal guard after you save his life.” 

Anyway Dalinar and Navani are now a thing. Their guards and clerks are starting to get a bit confused at how much time they spend together. And more discussion of Shshsh, who I hope we get the story of next book. God, I hope she’s not just one more fridged woman for male pain. 

Dalinar: how will we explain this to Elhokar??? Dalinar at the end of the book: yes i am fucking your mother goodbye 

...I still blame/thank Jazz for making me incapable of taking that scene seriously. 

Oh man, horns just sounded for a chasmfiend on the Tower HERE IT IS.  Kaladin, Dalinar, and Adolin are all getting ready for it, and the rate of my habitual leg-jiggle stim has like, doubled. Wonderful. 

And we also see Sadeas planning--trying to get Dalinar to commit most of his forces and leave behind his bridge crews. That sneaky bastard. Also Sadeas claims credit for the armored bridgemen idea. That dick. 

I’m gonna cut it here. I have a feeling I’ll scream a hell of a lot about the Tower. 

#stormlight archive liveblog #roshar #dalinar voice: unite them #FUCK YEAH BRIDGE FOUR #cultivation is that you #holy foreshadowing batman #dalinavani is a Good Ship

[airoasis]

Ever wonder how Bitcoin (and other cryptocurrencies) actually work?

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/ever-wonder-how-bitcoin-and-other-cryptocurrencies-actually-work-2/

Ever wonder how Bitcoin (and other cryptocurrencies) actually work?

What does it imply to have a bitcoin? Many individuals have now heard of bitcoin, thats its a entirely digital forex, with out a govt to quandary it and no banks wanted to manage bills and affirm transactions. That no one truely knows who invented it. But many individuals dont be aware of the reply to this question, as a minimum now not in full. To get there, and to be certain the technical important points underlying this reply believe motivated, had been going to walk through step-by way of-step how you might have invented your possess variation of Bitcoin. Well begin with you maintaining monitor of payments along with your pals making use of a communal ledger.Then, as you trust your pals and the sector less and less, and if youre intelligent ample to carry in a few tools of cryptography to help evade the need for believe, what you end up with whats known as a cryptocurrency. Bitcoin is solely the primary implemented illustration of a cryptocurrency, and there are now hundreds and hundreds extra on exchanges with typical currencies. Walking the trail of inventing your own can help set the groundwork for understanding one of the most more contemporary gamers in the game, and recognizing the place theres room for special design selections. Correctly, one of the factors I chose this matter is in accordance with the unheard of leap in concentration, investment and…Well.. Hype directed at these currencies in just the last year. I wont remark or speculate on the current or future trade charges, but I suppose wed all agree that any person watching to purchase a cryptocurrency should rather know what it’s.Not simply in phrases of analogies with indistinct connections to gold-mining, I imply an actual direct description of what computer systems are doing when sending, receiving and developing cryptocurrencies. One factor valued at stressing, by the way, is that despite the fact that you and i’ll dig into the underlying important points here, which takes some significant time, you dont in reality have to comprehend these small print to use a cryptocurrency, just like you dont need to comprehend the details of what happens below the hood when you swipe a credit card. Like another digital payments, there are a lot of user-pleasant purposes that let you send and obtain these currencies very quite simply. The change is that the spine underlying this isn’t a financial institution verifying transactions, however a clever method of decentralized trustless verification centered on probably the most math born in cryptography.To begin, set aside the notion of cryptocurrencies for a couple of minutes. Have been going to start the story with anything extra right down to earth: Ledgers, and digital signatures. If you happen to and your friends alternate money lovely traditionally, paying your share of the dinner bill and such, it can be inconvenient to exchange money always. So that you could keep a communal ledger that records payments you want to make in the future. Alice can pay Bob $20, Bob will pay Charlie $forty, matters like that. This ledger shall be anything public and available to every body, like a internet site where any one can go and just add new lines. On the end of each month, you all appear via the record of transactions and tally everything up. If youve spent more than you acquired, you put that cash into the pot, and if youve acquired more than you spent, you are taking that so much cash out. So the protocol for being a part of this method appears whatever like this: any one can add strains to the ledger, and on the finish of each month all people will get together to settles up with real cash.One difficulty with a public ledger like that is that after anyone can add a line, whats to avert Bob from going in and writing Alice pays Bob $100 with out Alice approving? How are we imagined to trust that every one these transactions are what the sender supposed for them to be? That is the place the first bit of cryptography is available in: Digital signatures. Like a handwritten signature, the proposal right here is that Alice should be competent to add anything next to a transaction that proves that she has obvious it, and accepted of it. And it will have to be infeasible for anyone else to forge her signature. To start with it would seem like digital signatures shouldnt even be viable, seeing that anything knowledge makes up the signature can simply be learn and copied with the aid of any computer, so how do you prevent forgeries? The way this works is that everybody generates whats referred to as a public key/personal key pair, each and every of which looks like some string of bits.The private secret’s often also known as the secret key, in order that we will abbreviate it to sk whilst abbreviating the public key as pk. As the names recommend, the secret secret is some thing you must hold to your self. In the real world, your handwritten signature appears the same it doesn’t matter what report youre signing. A digital signatures is way greater, in view that it alterations for one of a kind messages. It appears like a string of 1s and 0s, by and large whatever like 256 bits, and altering the message even quite utterly alterations what your signature on that message will have to seem like. Formally, producing a signature entails some operate that relies both on the message itself, and to your private key. The private key ensures that most effective which you can produce the signature, and the fact that it relies on the message means no person can just copy one in every of your signatures to forge it on an additional message. Hand-in-hand with this is a perform to affirm that a signature is legitimate, and that is the place the general public key comes into play.All it does it output actual or false to denote if this used to be a signature created via the private key associated with the public key you utilize for the verification. I wont go into the details how how exactly these functions work, however the thought is that it will have to be utterly infeasible to find a valid signature if you happen to dont know the secret key. Especially there is not any process better than just guessing and checking if random signatures are valid making use of the public key except you hit one that works. There are 2^256 feasible signatures with 256 bits, and youd ought to to find the person who work.This can be a stupidly big number. To name it astronomically tremendous can be giving way to a lot credit to astronomy. Actually, I made a supplemental video dedicated just to illustrating what a colossal number this is. Lets just say that when you confirm a signature towards a given message and public key, that you could feel tremendously confident that the only manner someone could have produced it is in the event that they knew the secret key associated with the public key. Theres one slight situation here: If Alice signs a transaction like Alice will pay Bob $100, although Bob cant forge Alices signature on new messages, he might simply copy that identical line as many times as he desires, in view that the message/signature combo is valid. To get around that, we make it so that when you sign a transaction, the message has to include some precise id associated with that transaction.That manner, if Alice can pay Bob $100 a couple of occasions, each and every transaction requires a completely new signature. Okay, high-quality, digital signatures take away a huge part of believe in our initial protocol. But even still, this depends on an honors method of varieties. Specifically, youre trusting that all people will truely comply with by way of and settle up in cash at the end of each month. However what if, for instance, Charlie racked up hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt, and simply refuses to exhibit up? The only real intent to revert to cash to settle up is that if some men and women, Im watching at you Charlie, owe a lot of money. So might be you’ve got the intelligent proposal that you just certainly not surely have got to settle up in cash as long as you have got some way to restrict individuals from spending too much greater than they soak up. What you might do is start via having every body pay $a hundred into the pot, and have the primary few lines of the ledger will learn Alice will get $one hundred, Bob will get $one hundred, and so on. Now, just dont receive transactions when someone is spending greater than they’ve on the ledger.For instance, after beginning every person off with $one hundred, if the first two transaction are Charlie pays Alice $50 and Charlie pay Bob $50, if he have been to try to add Charlie pays You $20, that will be invalid, as invalid as if he on no account signed it. Discover, this implies you must comprehend the full historical past of transactions to confirm that a brand new one is legitimate. And that is, more or less, going to be proper for cryptocurrencies as well, though there’s a little room for optimization. Whats fascinating right here is that this step relatively gets rid of the connection between the Ledger and bodily money. In conception, if everyone in the world used this Ledger, you might live your entire lifestyles simply sending and receiving money on this ledger with out ever converting to real US. To stress this factor, lets regarding portions on the ledger as LedgerDollars, or LD for short. Youre of path free to alternate LedgerDollars for real US dollars, for example might be Alice offers Bob a $10 bill in the actual world in exchange for him including and signing the transaction Bob can pay Alice 10 LedgerDollars to the communal ledger.But exchanges like this usually are not guaranteed in the protocol. Its now more analogous to the way you would trade dollars for Euros or any other currency on the open market, its simply its own impartial thing. This is the primary principal thing to fully grasp about Bitcoin, or any other cryptocurrency: What it’s is a ledger; the history of transactions is the currency. Of direction, with Bitcoin cash doesnt enter the Ledger with persons purchasing into utilising cash, sick get to how new cash enters the ledger in just a few minutes. Before that, theres an even more tremendous change between our current procedure of LedgerDollars how cryptocurrencies works. To this point, Ive said that this ledger is some public location, like a internet site where anybody can add new strains. But this requires trusting a valuable vicinity. Particularly, who hosts that internet site? Who controls the principles of including new traces? To dispose of that little bit of trust, good have all people maintain their possess copy of the ledger. Then to make a transaction, like Alice can pay Bob a hundred LedgerDollars, you broadcast into the sector for humans to hear and file on their own exclusive Ledgers.But until we do anything extra, this method would absurdly bad. How can you get each person to agree on what the proper ledger is? When Bob receives the transaction Alice can pay Bob 10 LedgerDollars, how can he be certain that every person else bought and believes that identical transaction? That hell be capable to later use these 10 LedgerDollars to make a exchange with Charlie. Rather, imagine your self simply paying attention to transactions being broadcast. How are you going to be definite that every body else is recording the identical transactions within the same order? Now weve hit on an fascinating puzzle: are you able to come up with a protocol for how you can receive or reject transactions and in what order so to think constructive that any one else on the planet following the equal protocol has a individual ledger that appears the same as yours? This is the main issue addressed within the common Bitcoin paper.At a high level, the answer Bitcoin presents to trust whichever ledger has probably the most computational work put into it. In poor health take a second to explain what precisely that suggests, which involves this factor called a Cryptographic hash function. The general idea well construct to is that when you use computational work as a basis for what to trust, that you may make it in order that fraudulent transactions and conflicting ledgers would require an infeasible quantity of computation. Once more, this is getting good into the weeds past what anybody would ought to be aware of just to make use of a forex like this. However its a fairly cool idea, and should you understand it, you realise the guts of bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies. A hash operate takes in any form of message or file, and outputs a string of bits with a constant size, like 256 bits.This output is known as the hash or digest of the message, and its supposed to look random. Its not random; it constantly offers the same output for a given input. However the idea is that when you relatively change the enter, probably modifying only one persona, the ensuing hash changes wholly. Actually, for the hash perform Im displaying here, known as SHA256, the way that output changes as you reasonably change the input is utterly unpredictable. You see, this isn’t simply any hash function, its a cryptographic hash operate. That means its infeasible to compute within the reverse path.If I show you some special string of 1s and 0s and ask you to find an enter message so that the SHA256 hash of that message offers this detailed string of bits, you’ll have no higher process than to wager and examine. Once more, if you want a consider for just how much computation could be needed to go by way of 2256 guesses, take a seem at the supplement video. I sincerely had means an excessive amount of fun writing that thing. You could think you would reverse engineer the favored input with the aid of rather digging through the small print of how the operate works, however no person has ever determined a technique to try this.Apparently, theres no proof that its difficult to compute within the reverse direction, but a big quantity of cutting-edge security relies on cryptographic hash services. When you have been to take a look at what algorithms underlie the at ease connection that your browser is making with YouTube correct now, or that it makes with a bank, you’re going to doubtless see a reputation like SHA256 in there. For right now, our center of attention will just be on how this kind of perform can prove that a distinctive list of transactions is related to a big amount of computational effort. Imagine any individual suggests you a record of transactions, and so they say I determined a specific number so that whilst you put this quantity on the end of list of transactions, and practice SHA256 the whole thing, the first 30 bits of the output are zeros. How rough do you believe it used to be for them to find that number? For a random message, the chance that the hash occurs to start with 30 successive zeros is 1 in 230, which is about 1 in one billion.For the reason that SHA256 is a cryptographic hash perform, the only option to find a certain number like this just guessing and checking. So this person almost obviously needed to go via a few billion different numbers earlier than discovering this distinct one. And as soon as you understand the quantity, which you can rapidly verify that this hash relatively does begin with 30 zeros. In other phrases, which you can verify they they went through a big amount of work while not having to move by way of that same effort yourself. That is called a proof of labor. And importantly, all this work is intrinsically tied to that list of transactions. In case you trade probably the most transactions, even somewhat, it might utterly alternate the hash, so youd need to go by way of a different billion guesses to discover a new proof of labor, a brand new number that makes it in order that the hash of the altered list along side this new quantity starts with 30 zeros.So now think back to our disbursed ledger problem. Everyone is broadcasting transactions, and we would like a technique for every person to agree on what the right ledger rather is. As I said, the core inspiration in the back of the normal bitcoin paper is to have everybody trust whichever ledger has the most work put into it. The this works is to first arrange a given ledger into blocks, where every block contains a record of transactions, together with a proof of work. That is, a particular number in order that the hash of the whole block starts with a bunch of zeros. For the second lets say it has to begin with 60 zeros, however later unwell return again to how you could decide upon that quantity. In the same method that a transaction is simplest viewed valid if it is signed with the aid of the sender, a block is only considered legitimate if it has a proof of work. Additionally, to ensure there’s a average method to order of those blocks, good make it in order that a block has to include the hash of the earlier block.That method, in the event you change any block, or attempt to swap the order of two blocks, it could alternate the block after it, which alterations that blocks hash, which alterations the next block, and so forth. That will require redoing the entire work, discovering a brand new unique quantity for each of those blocks that makes their hashes with 60 zeros. Because blocks are chained together like this, alternatively of calling it a ledger, this is usually known as a Blockchain. As part of our up to date protocol, good now allow any individual on the earth to be a block creator. What this means is that theyll pay attention for the transactions being broadcast, accumulate them into a block, then do a whole bunch of labor to search out the certain number that makes the hash of this block begin with 60 zeros, and broadcast out the block they found.To reward a block creator for all this work, when she places collectively a block, good allow her to incorporate a unique transaction at the high wherein she will get, say, 10 LedgerDollars out of skinny air. This is called the block reward. Its a exact exception to our common rules about whether or to not accept transactions; it doesnt come from any person, so it doesnt ought to be signed. It also means that the complete number of LedgerDollars in our financial system increases with each new block.Growing blocks is traditionally known as mining, considering that it requires quite a lot of work, and it introduces new bits of foreign money into the economic system. But whilst you hear or examine miners, keep in mind that what theyre quite doing is creating blocks, broadcasting these blocks, and getting rewarded with new cash for doing so. From the miners point of view, each block is like a miniature lottery, where all people is guessing numbers as rapid as they can except one fortunate character finds person who makes the hash of the block begin with many zeros, and will get rewarded for doing so. The best way our protocol will now work for anyone making use of this process is that as an alternative of listening for transactions, you pay attention for brand new blocks being broadcast by way of miners, updating your possess personal reproduction of the blockchain.The key addition is that should you hear of two distinct blockchains with conflicting transaction histories, you defer to the longest one, the one with probably the most work put into it. If theres a tie, wait except you hear of another block that makes one longer. So even though there’s no relevant authority, and every body is keeping their own replica of the blockchain, if every body is of the same opinion to present preference to whichever blockchain has the most work put into it, we have a technique to reach at decentralized consensus. To peer why this makes for a nontoxic approach, and to appreciate at what factor you must trust that a cost is legit, its important to stroll through what it could take to idiot any individual on this approach. If Alice desires to idiot Bob with a fraudulent block, she would attempt to ship him one that includes a her paying him a hundred LedgerDollars, but without broadcasting that block to the relaxation of the network.That means every body else thinks she nonetheless has those a hundred LedgerDollars. To do this, shed must discover a legitimate proof of labor before all other miners, each engaged on their possess block. And that might happen! Probably Alice wins this miniature lottery earlier than anybody else. However Bob will nonetheless be hearing proclaims made through different miners, to be able to maintain him believing the fraudulent block Alice would have got to do all of the work herself to hold adding blocks to this specific fork in Bobs blockchain thats different from what hes listening to from the leisure of the miners.Take into account, as per the protocol Bob perpetually trusts the longest chain he knows about. Alice perhaps in a position to hold this up for a couple of blocks if simply by way of danger she occurs to search out blocks more speedily than all of the leisure of the miners on the community combined. But except Alice has virtually 50% of the computing assets among all miners, the likelihood turns into overwhelming that the blockchain that the entire other miners are engaged on grows rapid than the single fraudulent blockchain that Alice is feeding Bob. So in time Bob will reject what hes listening to from Alice in favor of the longer chain that everyone else is engaged on.Become aware of that means you shouldnt always trust a new block that you hear instantly. As a substitute, you must watch for several new blocks to be delivered on prime of it. If you happen to still havent heard of any further blockchains, which you could believe that this block is part of the identical chain all people else is utilizing. And with that, weve hit all of the predominant suggestions. This dispensed ledger procedure headquartered on a proof of labor is more or less how the Bitcoin protocol works, and what number of other cryptocurrencies work.Theres only some details to remedy. Previous I mentioned that the proof of labor might be to discover a specified quantity so that the hash of the block starts with 60 zeros. The way in which the exact bitcoin protocol works is to periodically exchange that quantity of zeros so that it should take, on typical, 10 minutes to discover a block. In order there are increasingly miners on the community, the project will get tougher and tougher in this sort of way that this miniature lottery only has about one winner each 10 minutes.Many more moderen cryptocurrencies have much shorter block times. The entire money in Bitcoin eventually comes from some block reward. These rewards 50 Bitcoin per block. Theres a pleasant site known as block explorer the place that you can seem by way of the bitcoin blockchain, and in the event you seem at the very first few blocks on the chain, they incorporate no transactions rather then the 50 Bitcoin reward to the miner. Every 210,000 blocks, which is ready each four years, that reward will get reduce in half. So proper now, the reward is at 12.5 Bitcoin per block, and seeing that this reward decreases geometrically over time, there’ll on no account be more than 21 million bitcoin in existence. However, this doesnt imply miners will discontinue getting cash. In addition to the block reward, miners may additionally choose up transactions charges. The best way this works is that whenever you’re making a cost, you could optionally include a small transaction price with it in an effort to go to the miner of something block entails that payment.The motive you would do that is to incentivize miners to honestly comprise the transaction you broadcast into the next block. You see, in Bitcoin, every block is restricted to about 2,400 transactions, which many critics argue is unnecessarily restrictive. For evaluation, Visa strategies an average of round 1,seven-hundred transactions per 2d, and theyre in a position of handling greater than 24,000 per second.Slower processing on Bitcoin method larger transactions fees, since thats what determines which transactions miners choose to incorporate in new blocks. This is some distance from a comprehensive insurance policy of cryptocurrencies. There are many nuances and alternate design alternatives I havent touched here, however expectantly this may furnish a steady Wait-however-Why-style tree trunk of working out for someone watching to add a few extra branches with further studying. Like I mentioned on the start, some of the motivations in the back of this video is that some huge cash has started flowing toward cryptocurrencies, and even though I dont wish to make any claims about whether thats a excellent or dangerous investment, I do think itd be healthful for people coming into this recreation to at least be aware of the fundamentals of the technological know-how.As consistently, my sincerest thanks these of you making this channel possible on Patreon. I recognize now not everyone is equipped to contribute, but when youre still fascinated with helping out, one the first-class methods to do this is comfortably to share movies that you simply feel probably exciting or helpful to others. I know you recognize that, but it surely quite does support. I additionally wish to thank Protocol Labs for their aid of this video. That is an organization that runs a number of research and development tasks, and if you happen to comply with the links Ive left in the description to learn into the main points of those initiatives, youll observe some strong parallels with the standards blanketed on this video. The challenges and advantages of decentralization are under no circumstances restricted to currency and transaction histories, and the usefulness of tools from cryptography like hash functions and digital signatures are likewise much more common.For instance, a few Protocol Labs initiatives, comparable to IPFS and Filecoin, middle on dispensed filestorage, which opens a entire subject of fascinating challenges and prospects. For any builders in the market, Protocol labs areas a excessive price on open supply, so if youre which you could become a member of whats already a very powerful neighborhood of contributors. Theyre also looking to hire more full-time developers, so for those who feel you possibly a just right fit for some of these projects, undoubtedly practice. .

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Ever wonder how Bitcoin (and other cryptocurrencies) actually work?

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Ever wonder how Bitcoin (and other cryptocurrencies) actually work?

What does it imply to have a bitcoin? Many individuals have now heard of bitcoin, thats its a entirely digital forex, with out a govt to quandary it and no banks wanted to manage bills and affirm transactions. That no one truely knows who invented it. But many individuals dont be aware of the reply to this question, as a minimum now not in full. To get there, and to be certain the technical important points underlying this reply believe motivated, had been going to walk through step-by way of-step how you might have invented your possess variation of Bitcoin. Well begin with you maintaining monitor of payments along with your pals making use of a communal ledger.Then, as you trust your pals and the sector less and less, and if youre intelligent ample to carry in a few tools of cryptography to help evade the need for believe, what you end up with whats known as a cryptocurrency. Bitcoin is solely the primary implemented illustration of a cryptocurrency, and there are now hundreds and hundreds extra on exchanges with typical currencies. Walking the trail of inventing your own can help set the groundwork for understanding one of the most more contemporary gamers in the game, and recognizing the place theres room for special design selections. Correctly, one of the factors I chose this matter is in accordance with the unheard of leap in concentration, investment and…Well.. Hype directed at these currencies in just the last year. I wont remark or speculate on the current or future trade charges, but I suppose wed all agree that any person watching to purchase a cryptocurrency should rather know what it’s.Not simply in phrases of analogies with indistinct connections to gold-mining, I imply an actual direct description of what computer systems are doing when sending, receiving and developing cryptocurrencies. One factor valued at stressing, by the way, is that despite the fact that you and i’ll dig into the underlying important points here, which takes some significant time, you dont in reality have to comprehend these small print to use a cryptocurrency, just like you dont need to comprehend the details of what happens below the hood when you swipe a credit card. Like another digital payments, there are a lot of user-pleasant purposes that let you send and obtain these currencies very quite simply. The change is that the spine underlying this isn’t a financial institution verifying transactions, however a clever method of decentralized trustless verification centered on probably the most math born in cryptography.To begin, set aside the notion of cryptocurrencies for a couple of minutes. Have been going to start the story with anything extra right down to earth: Ledgers, and digital signatures. If you happen to and your friends alternate money lovely traditionally, paying your share of the dinner bill and such, it can be inconvenient to exchange money always. So that you could keep a communal ledger that records payments you want to make in the future. Alice can pay Bob $20, Bob will pay Charlie $forty, matters like that. This ledger shall be anything public and available to every body, like a internet site where any one can go and just add new lines. On the end of each month, you all appear via the record of transactions and tally everything up. If youve spent more than you acquired, you put that cash into the pot, and if youve acquired more than you spent, you are taking that so much cash out. So the protocol for being a part of this method appears whatever like this: any one can add strains to the ledger, and on the finish of each month all people will get together to settles up with real cash.One difficulty with a public ledger like that is that after anyone can add a line, whats to avert Bob from going in and writing Alice pays Bob $100 with out Alice approving? How are we imagined to trust that every one these transactions are what the sender supposed for them to be? That is the place the first bit of cryptography is available in: Digital signatures. Like a handwritten signature, the proposal right here is that Alice should be competent to add anything next to a transaction that proves that she has obvious it, and accepted of it. And it will have to be infeasible for anyone else to forge her signature. To start with it would seem like digital signatures shouldnt even be viable, seeing that anything knowledge makes up the signature can simply be learn and copied with the aid of any computer, so how do you prevent forgeries? The way this works is that everybody generates whats referred to as a public key/personal key pair, each and every of which looks like some string of bits.The private secret’s often also known as the secret key, in order that we will abbreviate it to sk whilst abbreviating the public key as pk. As the names recommend, the secret secret is some thing you must hold to your self. In the real world, your handwritten signature appears the same it doesn’t matter what report youre signing. A digital signatures is way greater, in view that it alterations for one of a kind messages. It appears like a string of 1s and 0s, by and large whatever like 256 bits, and altering the message even quite utterly alterations what your signature on that message will have to seem like. Formally, producing a signature entails some operate that relies both on the message itself, and to your private key. The private key ensures that most effective which you can produce the signature, and the fact that it relies on the message means no person can just copy one in every of your signatures to forge it on an additional message. Hand-in-hand with this is a perform to affirm that a signature is legitimate, and that is the place the general public key comes into play.All it does it output actual or false to denote if this used to be a signature created via the private key associated with the public key you utilize for the verification. I wont go into the details how how exactly these functions work, however the thought is that it will have to be utterly infeasible to find a valid signature if you happen to dont know the secret key. Especially there is not any process better than just guessing and checking if random signatures are valid making use of the public key except you hit one that works. There are 2^256 feasible signatures with 256 bits, and youd ought to to find the person who work.This can be a stupidly big number. To name it astronomically tremendous can be giving way to a lot credit to astronomy. Actually, I made a supplemental video dedicated just to illustrating what a colossal number this is. Lets just say that when you confirm a signature towards a given message and public key, that you could feel tremendously confident that the only manner someone could have produced it is in the event that they knew the secret key associated with the public key. Theres one slight situation here: If Alice signs a transaction like Alice will pay Bob $100, although Bob cant forge Alices signature on new messages, he might simply copy that identical line as many times as he desires, in view that the message/signature combo is valid. To get around that, we make it so that when you sign a transaction, the message has to include some precise id associated with that transaction.That manner, if Alice can pay Bob $100 a couple of occasions, each and every transaction requires a completely new signature. Okay, high-quality, digital signatures take away a huge part of believe in our initial protocol. But even still, this depends on an honors method of varieties. Specifically, youre trusting that all people will truely comply with by way of and settle up in cash at the end of each month. However what if, for instance, Charlie racked up hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt, and simply refuses to exhibit up? The only real intent to revert to cash to settle up is that if some men and women, Im watching at you Charlie, owe a lot of money. So might be you’ve got the intelligent proposal that you just certainly not surely have got to settle up in cash as long as you have got some way to restrict individuals from spending too much greater than they soak up. What you might do is start via having every body pay $a hundred into the pot, and have the primary few lines of the ledger will learn Alice will get $one hundred, Bob will get $one hundred, and so on. Now, just dont receive transactions when someone is spending greater than they’ve on the ledger.For instance, after beginning every person off with $one hundred, if the first two transaction are Charlie pays Alice $50 and Charlie pay Bob $50, if he have been to try to add Charlie pays You $20, that will be invalid, as invalid as if he on no account signed it. Discover, this implies you must comprehend the full historical past of transactions to confirm that a brand new one is legitimate. And that is, more or less, going to be proper for cryptocurrencies as well, though there’s a little room for optimization. Whats fascinating right here is that this step relatively gets rid of the connection between the Ledger and bodily money. In conception, if everyone in the world used this Ledger, you might live your entire lifestyles simply sending and receiving money on this ledger with out ever converting to real US. To stress this factor, lets regarding portions on the ledger as LedgerDollars, or LD for short. Youre of path free to alternate LedgerDollars for real US dollars, for example might be Alice offers Bob a $10 bill in the actual world in exchange for him including and signing the transaction Bob can pay Alice 10 LedgerDollars to the communal ledger.But exchanges like this usually are not guaranteed in the protocol. Its now more analogous to the way you would trade dollars for Euros or any other currency on the open market, its simply its own impartial thing. This is the primary principal thing to fully grasp about Bitcoin, or any other cryptocurrency: What it’s is a ledger; the history of transactions is the currency. Of direction, with Bitcoin cash doesnt enter the Ledger with persons purchasing into utilising cash, sick get to how new cash enters the ledger in just a few minutes. Before that, theres an even more tremendous change between our current procedure of LedgerDollars how cryptocurrencies works. To this point, Ive said that this ledger is some public location, like a internet site where anybody can add new strains. But this requires trusting a valuable vicinity. Particularly, who hosts that internet site? Who controls the principles of including new traces? To dispose of that little bit of trust, good have all people maintain their possess copy of the ledger. Then to make a transaction, like Alice can pay Bob a hundred LedgerDollars, you broadcast into the sector for humans to hear and file on their own exclusive Ledgers.But until we do anything extra, this method would absurdly bad. How can you get each person to agree on what the proper ledger is? When Bob receives the transaction Alice can pay Bob 10 LedgerDollars, how can he be certain that every person else bought and believes that identical transaction? That hell be capable to later use these 10 LedgerDollars to make a exchange with Charlie. Rather, imagine your self simply paying attention to transactions being broadcast. How are you going to be definite that every body else is recording the identical transactions within the same order? Now weve hit on an fascinating puzzle: are you able to come up with a protocol for how you can receive or reject transactions and in what order so to think constructive that any one else on the planet following the equal protocol has a individual ledger that appears the same as yours? This is the main issue addressed within the common Bitcoin paper.At a high level, the answer Bitcoin presents to trust whichever ledger has probably the most computational work put into it. In poor health take a second to explain what precisely that suggests, which involves this factor called a Cryptographic hash function. The general idea well construct to is that when you use computational work as a basis for what to trust, that you may make it in order that fraudulent transactions and conflicting ledgers would require an infeasible quantity of computation. Once more, this is getting good into the weeds past what anybody would ought to be aware of just to make use of a forex like this. However its a fairly cool idea, and should you understand it, you realise the guts of bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies. A hash operate takes in any form of message or file, and outputs a string of bits with a constant size, like 256 bits.This output is known as the hash or digest of the message, and its supposed to look random. Its not random; it constantly offers the same output for a given input. However the idea is that when you relatively change the enter, probably modifying only one persona, the ensuing hash changes wholly. Actually, for the hash perform Im displaying here, known as SHA256, the way that output changes as you reasonably change the input is utterly unpredictable. You see, this isn’t simply any hash function, its a cryptographic hash operate. That means its infeasible to compute within the reverse path.If I show you some special string of 1s and 0s and ask you to find an enter message so that the SHA256 hash of that message offers this detailed string of bits, you’ll have no higher process than to wager and examine. Once more, if you want a consider for just how much computation could be needed to go by way of 2256 guesses, take a seem at the supplement video. I sincerely had means an excessive amount of fun writing that thing. You could think you would reverse engineer the favored input with the aid of rather digging through the small print of how the operate works, however no person has ever determined a technique to try this.Apparently, theres no proof that its difficult to compute within the reverse direction, but a big quantity of cutting-edge security relies on cryptographic hash services. When you have been to take a look at what algorithms underlie the at ease connection that your browser is making with YouTube correct now, or that it makes with a bank, you’re going to doubtless see a reputation like SHA256 in there. For right now, our center of attention will just be on how this kind of perform can prove that a distinctive list of transactions is related to a big amount of computational effort. Imagine any individual suggests you a record of transactions, and so they say I determined a specific number so that whilst you put this quantity on the end of list of transactions, and practice SHA256 the whole thing, the first 30 bits of the output are zeros. How rough do you believe it used to be for them to find that number? For a random message, the chance that the hash occurs to start with 30 successive zeros is 1 in 230, which is about 1 in one billion.For the reason that SHA256 is a cryptographic hash perform, the only option to find a certain number like this just guessing and checking. So this person almost obviously needed to go via a few billion different numbers earlier than discovering this distinct one. And as soon as you understand the quantity, which you can rapidly verify that this hash relatively does begin with 30 zeros. In other phrases, which you can verify they they went through a big amount of work while not having to move by way of that same effort yourself. That is called a proof of labor. And importantly, all this work is intrinsically tied to that list of transactions. In case you trade probably the most transactions, even somewhat, it might utterly alternate the hash, so youd need to go by way of a different billion guesses to discover a new proof of labor, a brand new number that makes it in order that the hash of the altered list along side this new quantity starts with 30 zeros.So now think back to our disbursed ledger problem. Everyone is broadcasting transactions, and we would like a technique for every person to agree on what the right ledger rather is. As I said, the core inspiration in the back of the normal bitcoin paper is to have everybody trust whichever ledger has the most work put into it. The this works is to first arrange a given ledger into blocks, where every block contains a record of transactions, together with a proof of work. That is, a particular number in order that the hash of the whole block starts with a bunch of zeros. For the second lets say it has to begin with 60 zeros, however later unwell return again to how you could decide upon that quantity. In the same method that a transaction is simplest viewed valid if it is signed with the aid of the sender, a block is only considered legitimate if it has a proof of work. Additionally, to ensure there’s a average method to order of those blocks, good make it in order that a block has to include the hash of the earlier block.That method, in the event you change any block, or attempt to swap the order of two blocks, it could alternate the block after it, which alterations that blocks hash, which alterations the next block, and so forth. That will require redoing the entire work, discovering a brand new unique quantity for each of those blocks that makes their hashes with 60 zeros. Because blocks are chained together like this, alternatively of calling it a ledger, this is usually known as a Blockchain. As part of our up to date protocol, good now allow any individual on the earth to be a block creator. What this means is that theyll pay attention for the transactions being broadcast, accumulate them into a block, then do a whole bunch of labor to search out the certain number that makes the hash of this block begin with 60 zeros, and broadcast out the block they found.To reward a block creator for all this work, when she places collectively a block, good allow her to incorporate a unique transaction at the high wherein she will get, say, 10 LedgerDollars out of skinny air. This is called the block reward. Its a exact exception to our common rules about whether or to not accept transactions; it doesnt come from any person, so it doesnt ought to be signed. It also means that the complete number of LedgerDollars in our financial system increases with each new block.Growing blocks is traditionally known as mining, considering that it requires quite a lot of work, and it introduces new bits of foreign money into the economic system. But whilst you hear or examine miners, keep in mind that what theyre quite doing is creating blocks, broadcasting these blocks, and getting rewarded with new cash for doing so. From the miners point of view, each block is like a miniature lottery, where all people is guessing numbers as rapid as they can except one fortunate character finds person who makes the hash of the block begin with many zeros, and will get rewarded for doing so. The best way our protocol will now work for anyone making use of this process is that as an alternative of listening for transactions, you pay attention for brand new blocks being broadcast by way of miners, updating your possess personal reproduction of the blockchain.The key addition is that should you hear of two distinct blockchains with conflicting transaction histories, you defer to the longest one, the one with probably the most work put into it. If theres a tie, wait except you hear of another block that makes one longer. So even though there’s no relevant authority, and every body is keeping their own replica of the blockchain, if every body is of the same opinion to present preference to whichever blockchain has the most work put into it, we have a technique to reach at decentralized consensus. To peer why this makes for a nontoxic approach, and to appreciate at what factor you must trust that a cost is legit, its important to stroll through what it could take to idiot any individual on this approach. If Alice desires to idiot Bob with a fraudulent block, she would attempt to ship him one that includes a her paying him a hundred LedgerDollars, but without broadcasting that block to the relaxation of the network.That means every body else thinks she nonetheless has those a hundred LedgerDollars. To do this, shed must discover a legitimate proof of labor before all other miners, each engaged on their possess block. And that might happen! Probably Alice wins this miniature lottery earlier than anybody else. However Bob will nonetheless be hearing proclaims made through different miners, to be able to maintain him believing the fraudulent block Alice would have got to do all of the work herself to hold adding blocks to this specific fork in Bobs blockchain thats different from what hes listening to from the leisure of the miners.Take into account, as per the protocol Bob perpetually trusts the longest chain he knows about. Alice perhaps in a position to hold this up for a couple of blocks if simply by way of danger she occurs to search out blocks more speedily than all of the leisure of the miners on the community combined. But except Alice has virtually 50% of the computing assets among all miners, the likelihood turns into overwhelming that the blockchain that the entire other miners are engaged on grows rapid than the single fraudulent blockchain that Alice is feeding Bob. So in time Bob will reject what hes listening to from Alice in favor of the longer chain that everyone else is engaged on.Become aware of that means you shouldnt always trust a new block that you hear instantly. As a substitute, you must watch for several new blocks to be delivered on prime of it. If you happen to still havent heard of any further blockchains, which you could believe that this block is part of the identical chain all people else is utilizing. And with that, weve hit all of the predominant suggestions. This dispensed ledger procedure headquartered on a proof of labor is more or less how the Bitcoin protocol works, and what number of other cryptocurrencies work.Theres only some details to remedy. Previous I mentioned that the proof of labor might be to discover a specified quantity so that the hash of the block starts with 60 zeros. The way in which the exact bitcoin protocol works is to periodically exchange that quantity of zeros so that it should take, on typical, 10 minutes to discover a block. In order there are increasingly miners on the community, the project will get tougher and tougher in this sort of way that this miniature lottery only has about one winner each 10 minutes.Many more moderen cryptocurrencies have much shorter block times. The entire money in Bitcoin eventually comes from some block reward. These rewards 50 Bitcoin per block. Theres a pleasant site known as block explorer the place that you can seem by way of the bitcoin blockchain, and in the event you seem at the very first few blocks on the chain, they incorporate no transactions rather then the 50 Bitcoin reward to the miner. Every 210,000 blocks, which is ready each four years, that reward will get reduce in half. So proper now, the reward is at 12.5 Bitcoin per block, and seeing that this reward decreases geometrically over time, there’ll on no account be more than 21 million bitcoin in existence. However, this doesnt imply miners will discontinue getting cash. In addition to the block reward, miners may additionally choose up transactions charges. The best way this works is that whenever you’re making a cost, you could optionally include a small transaction price with it in an effort to go to the miner of something block entails that payment.The motive you would do that is to incentivize miners to honestly comprise the transaction you broadcast into the next block. You see, in Bitcoin, every block is restricted to about 2,400 transactions, which many critics argue is unnecessarily restrictive. For evaluation, Visa strategies an average of round 1,seven-hundred transactions per 2d, and theyre in a position of handling greater than 24,000 per second.Slower processing on Bitcoin method larger transactions fees, since thats what determines which transactions miners choose to incorporate in new blocks. This is some distance from a comprehensive insurance policy of cryptocurrencies. There are many nuances and alternate design alternatives I havent touched here, however expectantly this may furnish a steady Wait-however-Why-style tree trunk of working out for someone watching to add a few extra branches with further studying. Like I mentioned on the start, some of the motivations in the back of this video is that some huge cash has started flowing toward cryptocurrencies, and even though I dont wish to make any claims about whether thats a excellent or dangerous investment, I do think itd be healthful for people coming into this recreation to at least be aware of the fundamentals of the technological know-how.As consistently, my sincerest thanks these of you making this channel possible on Patreon. I recognize now not everyone is equipped to contribute, but when youre still fascinated with helping out, one the first-class methods to do this is comfortably to share movies that you simply feel probably exciting or helpful to others. I know you recognize that, but it surely quite does support. I additionally wish to thank Protocol Labs for their aid of this video. That is an organization that runs a number of research and development tasks, and if you happen to comply with the links Ive left in the description to learn into the main points of those initiatives, youll observe some strong parallels with the standards blanketed on this video. The challenges and advantages of decentralization are under no circumstances restricted to currency and transaction histories, and the usefulness of tools from cryptography like hash functions and digital signatures are likewise much more common.For instance, a few Protocol Labs initiatives, comparable to IPFS and Filecoin, middle on dispensed filestorage, which opens a entire subject of fascinating challenges and prospects. For any builders in the market, Protocol labs areas a excessive price on open supply, so if youre which you could become a member of whats already a very powerful neighborhood of contributors. Theyre also looking to hire more full-time developers, so for those who feel you possibly a just right fit for some of these projects, undoubtedly practice. .

[kristie-rp]

[2018] Garrett: Turning

It is a truth universally acknowledged that anyone acting particularly weird in the hospital must be in want of Doctor Vincent Constantine. 

Okay, no, that’s not true, exactly. It’s more a truth acknowledged only within the hospital itself, and weirdness is relative, and they don’t always know they need Constantine’s expertise. That’s just how it gets explained to Garrett when he starts his placement during med school, by a curly haired woman speaking behind her hand in a stage whisper. Doctor Constantine himself snorts and shoots her an unimpressed look, and does a double take when he sees Garrett. There’s something vaguely familiar in it, and the intern smiles politely. “Hi, Doctor Constantine.” 

“Call me Vincent,” comes the reply. “She’s right, in a manner of speaking. If something seems particularly... peculiar, then I am the resident expert. Feel free to come to me.”

Garrett doesn’t think much about it, afterwards. The thing is, he doesn’t work in Vincent’s department, at least not at first. The older man operates largely out of the basement, where a morgue would be in any other hospital: it has been turned into a ward, and the windows of half the rooms are blacked out with heavy tarps. It’s eerie. When Garrett brings his toddler daughter April to work some days, when she is too young to be home alone and not able to be at daycare, she tends to spend time with the old man. He doesn’t get it, but he allows it. 

He’s been a fully qualified medical practitioner employed by the hospital for eight months before he thinks about the description of Vincent’s specialisation. A couple have brought in their terrified daughter, who is incredibly pretty for a human child and also very quick-witted and persuasive. She has talked the nurse out of at least three lollipops before Garrett arrives in the room to introduce himself and shoo the nurse away. 

“Do you really need so many,” her mother is asking a little helplessly, taking the third one from her daughter. The little girl shrugs, and asks her dad to get her some water, please, from the vending machine. Because her mother is the one with money, she goes, too. The little girl is alone with Garrett. 

“They think I’m sick,” she informs him flatly, pouting slightly. “I don’t think they’re wrong. I mean. I know I’m not like the other girls. And there are these.” She tugs at her beanie and it lifts away to reveal small horns on her forehead. She is very careful not to rip the wool. “My mom’s worried.”

“Cutaneous horns aren’t unheard of,” Garrett tries. He doubts it’s that simple; the very sentence sits wrong on his tongue. Plus, every instance of cutaneous horns he’s heard of presented in the elderly. 

The little girl, apparently, is aware of this. “I know how to Google,” she says dismissively, “and I know only old people have that happen. So why is this happening to me now?” 

Garrett hesitates. He can order tests – of course he can. But something gives him pause. The mother and father return, and Garrett makes up his mind: he leans out of the door to catch a nurse as she passes by. “Hi, sorry – can you run down to the basement and find Doctor Constantine, please? I need a consult.” 

The nurse looks at him curiously, but returns in fifteen minutes with Vincent himself. He looks between the couple. “Are you her father?” 

The man shakes his head. “We adopted her a few years ago,” he explains. The little girl doesn’t seem bothered by this, and her mother has rested a hand on her little girls shoulder. “We have the record of her biological parents medical information –” 

The mother starts to search in her bag for the papers. Vincent stops her with a wave of her hand. “No matter, they won’t be accurate.” 

The parents make outraged sounds, and the little girl blinks at him. “You know what’s wrong with me?” she asks. Her voice is much smaller than it was earlier, alone with Garrett. He can’t blame her, really; Vincent has that effect on people. 

“Have any of you heard of a Cambion?” is what Vincent asks, completely without preamble. Garrett starts, because he’s heard of those, in fascinated Wikipedia spirals that almost always end with him looking up different takes on mythological beings – and this doctor, whom he respects, is talking as though the creature is real. “It is the result of a sexual union between an Incubus and a human woman. I’d bet the mother listed her boyfriends information before giving her up, knowing exactly what she was getting into.” He pauses, addressing the girl directly. “The horns may be surgically removed once they are fully grown, but that won’t happen until you’ve completed puberty. You likely had almost no pulse until you were seven, and you’ve likely noticed you barely need to breathe. You’re clever and beautiful, more than human girls, and you’re persuasive. Many would call you manipulative. Does this sound right?” The little girl is staring at him, somewhere between dumbfounded and fascinated. Garrett can see in her face that this explains everything. “You have the potential to be evil, but with good parents – nurture over nature, all that – it can be subverted or at least limited. Any questions?” 

If there are, Garrett doesn’t hear them, watching the girls face instead. He can’t see Vincent’s, but that girl is looking at him like he told her the meaning of life, and has no longer left her confused and wanting, unsure what she is. 

Garrett doesn’t know if he entirely believes the story, but he’s half-way there. It helps that the little girl pauses to give him a hug and to thank him on the way out, beanie back in place.

Garrett’s co-workers think that his fascination with Vincent’s so-called department – which exists primarily due to the Constantine’s donating more money to the hospital than the accounting department is willing to disclose – is ridiculous and confusing. They think Vincent is insane, or delusional, or at least eccentric, for all they respect him as their fellow doctor. But every single one of them is willing to call the older man for a consult when the situation calls for it, which is really all Garrett can hope for, so he mostly ignores the opportunities to mock them.

(Mostly, because sometimes he cannot bite his tongue fast enough to ensure he is less sarcastic in the workplace than he is at home, with April, who by now is a teenager who really ought to have a more sincere parental figure to turn to.) 

Anyway: it is not uncommon for Garrett to visit Vincent’s basement, either to ask pointed questions or chat with patients kept so separate from the others. He does this more predictably on the nights when April is not supposed to be coming home, and tonight she is staying at a friends place while they work on a project for class. He does not have to be home in time for dinner, so he meanders down to where he can visit at his own pace. 

There is a woman with albinism in one room. She greets him warmly, as she had the last time he’d been here, by putting on a terrible Transylvanian accent and calling herself a vampire. Garrett quirks a brow at her, thinking something along the lines of you wouldn’t be quite that pale if you dined on blood, Zoe. She laughs aloud. “Alright, fair enough, I’ll let you have that one. Stop by on your way out, Doc,” she insists, and he can almost feel the idea settling in his mind, ensuring he will do as asked later. 

“Is your tail ever going to heal?” Garrett asks the man in the next room, curious.

The merman with his blue-tinted skin snorts, his teeth growing in jagged rows; according to what he’s told them, he is a hybrid of some sharks that wouldn’t ever frequent the bay around Port Lyndon. “I’m not the doctor,” he says, splashing impatiently. He is caught halfway between human and mer form, and the pain shows in how pale around the gills he is. “Ask Vince.” 

“Yeah, sure, I’ll get right on that. Straight after my stopover at H.L. to let them know what I am,” Garrett retorts, earning a laugh from the mer as he splashes contentedly. 

He stops at the door of the selkie to smile and let her know that he’s passing through, because he knows she’s mostly here because of the debilitating anxiety that came from losing her pelt – only she hasn’t felt compelled to actually go to anyone, so it isn’t stolen, just legitimately lost. There’d be more chance of finding it if it was stolen, from what Garrett understands – it is hard to get her to talk, because Vincent is the expert, and he’s not exactly personable. 

The next room was home to a slightly burned dryad the last time he was here, but his bark was basically finished moulting, which means he should be gone, and the room should be empty. Garrett opens the door to check, eyes widening when he instead gets an eyeful of a wolf-like being – it’s a fully transformed werewolf, he knows that – and yet his immediate panicked reaction is to step closer and slam the door closed.

Yeah, his self-preservation instincts have always been terrible, he is aware. He does things like drink hot sauce on a dare (college) and break into his parents liquor cabinet (high school) and grab the arms of angry looking people on crutches to prevent them from walking into traffic (summer between high school and college, and actually he’s proud of that one). He has a feeling he’d step in front of a gunman to save someone, even a stranger.

That might explain locking himself in with an angry looking werewolf. One that’s currently edging closer. 

“Crap,” he croaks, panic making his voice crack, and presses himself against the door. 

He blacks out. 

It’s probably for the best.

“I have to hand it to you, Garrett,” a familiar voice is saying when he comes to, blinking at a white tile ceiling, “if you were going to be infected by a supernatural condition, this is probably the best possible place you could’ve done it.” 

“That’s nice,” Garrett says. He thinks he sounds about as sarcastic as usual, but he might be a little dazed. It’s something to do with the fact that he can make out the little specks across the surface of the tiles, which is weird, because he should be wearing glasses, and he can’t feel them on his face. “I think my veins are on fire.” 

“That’d be the wolfsbane,” the voice answers, apparently unbothered. It’s Vincent. Garrett is not surprised. 

Garrett closes his eyes. “You’re suppressing a transformation, aren’t you. Isn’t that a bad idea?” 

“Which one of us is the expert?” 

Garrett scoffs. “Which one of us is a werewolf?” 

There’s a long silence that makes Garrett want to open his eyes, but it’s bad enough that he can hear a heartbeat that he’s pretty sure isn’t close enough to be Vincent. Which means his co-worker doesn’t have a heartbeat. Which – he had to pass a medical to get this job; how did Vincent get the job with no heartbeat, without causing some sort of crisis? He keeps his eyes firmly shut, thanks ever so much. “Touché,” Vincent says at last, and Garrett can hear the amusement in his voice. 

“How long was I out?” 

“A couple of hours. Your phone rang; it was your daughter. She’ll be here soon.” 

“Sure, that’s a brilliant idea,” he mutters, sarcasm heavy in his voice. Garrett’s eyes fly open and he sits up a little quicker than he would like, blinking against the abrupt change of scenery and the headrush. “By which I mean, you just said I’m a newly turned werewolf, Vincent, what the fuck?” 

“At least you already know werewolves exist,” he says.

It’s not helpful. Garrett gives him the glare he thinks he deserves, and then lays back down, pressing his palms into his closed eyes. Maybe if he thinks hard enough, this will go away. “I can’t be a werewolf,” he says, as if it will change anything. “I have a teenage daughter. I’m a medical doctor. I work night shift half the time, I can’t take every full moon off!” 

“That’s what the wolfsbane is for.” 

“Oh, right. How could I forget? My veins feel like they’re actually on fire and this is the only way to not turn into a wolf that will bite anyone around.” 

“You’re a very negative person, aren’t you?” 

Garrett grimaces. He’s just realized what the heartbeat he can hear actually is, and attempts to peer at the other occupant of the room, the one he missed. “Sorry, Dave. I didn’t mean any offence. Much.” 

Dave, the werewolf responsible for this entire thing, snorts, but it sounds half-hearted and exhausted. He is trembling. “I should be the one apologizing. I ruined your life, man. I owe you.” 

“Should I be worried about the shaking?” 

“Doc didn’t give me any ‘bane until I’d already transformed, is all. Remember to take it like you’re s’posed to and it works out better.” 

“Great.” Garrett takes medication for anxiety on the daily. He now has to add injections of liquidated wolfsbane to his schedule at least once a month, twice in a blue moon, and he really doesn’t want to wish harm on Dave – so he doesn’t. He closes his eyes again, takes a deep, supposedly steadying breath. “This is just what I needed.” 

“Dad?” 

Garrett opens his eyes and looks up. April is standing over him with a look of concern, the door open behind where his head has been resting this entire time. “Hey, sweetie,” he says, trying for a sincere smile. He doesn’t know how close he gets as she dumps her bag and kneels down beside him. “I hear your sleepover wasn’t that great.” 

“Muriel is being mean, so I called to come home. Vincent said you were – hurt?” 

“Oh, it’s nothing. I’m just – um.” Garrett pauses. He cannot lie to his daughter, she needs to know what is going on. It isn’t fair to keep her in the dark. 

He has to tell her about supernaturals, if she hasn’t guessed already.

Garrett groans aloud, pressing his palms back into his eye sockets. “Remind me to kill you later,” he mutters. “It’s the least you deserve.” 

Vincent snorts, and Dave’s noise is more like a whimper. There’s something decidedly lupine in it, and that’s exactly the sort of thing Garrett needs to hear right now. 

“So,” he starts, pulling his eyes away, “you know how there are humans in the world, and they have different races? African, Asian, Caucasian, Mongoloid.” 

“Yes...?”

“Well, those differences are just aesthetic. The differences that actually matter a little bit are the ones that make human beings into something – supernatural.” 

There’s quiet for a long moment. “Are you trying to make a joke about that TV show?” April asks, wary. 

Garrett sighs. He wishes he was. “I wish I was,” he says, “but what I’m actually saying is that vampires and werewolves and dryads and all that – it’s real. That’s what’s special about Vincent’s patients. That’s why they are in the basements, that’s why pretty much everyone avoids him and thinks he’s insane.” 

“Hey,” Vincent says. It’s mild enough that Garrett doesn’t believe he actually cares. 

“Also, that’s Dave. Say hi to Dave.” He waits for April to wave awkwardly at the patient. “He’s a werewolf. And he bit me.”

#kristie's writing #kristie writes #kwrites #kwriting #ft. garrett #ft. dave #ft. vincent #ft. april

[merlinficreview]

Search and Rescue Chapters 14-15 Review!

Search and Rescue (Word Count: 77228): Chapters 14-15

Chapter 14

This chapter opens with Arthur dancing his troubles away.

He is sweaty and gross. “Afallach is the first to stop. ‘Must we...’ He doubles over as he pants. ‘Must we go on much longer?’” That one’s a double hitter, ya’ll!.

“’No, we don't.’ Arthur's exercised enough for the day and is on duty starting at four.” Ohhhh he’s “exercising.” I legitimately thought he was dancing in a club from this description of him, “Pounding the ground with his feet, Arthur keeps the tempo of the music wafting into his ears. Pumping arms and legs, he goes faster and faster, till sweat covers all of his body and his hair's drenched. Perspiration dripping from his elbows and from his nose as well as his eyelashes, he looks ahead, head tipped up, so it won't get into his eyes.” That seems like dancing, yes? Maybe he’s running? Also, that is not a response to the question you were asked, Arthur. You ought to learn better listening skills if you’re going to run a country.

Arthur has helicopter duty in four hours and he is nervous about seeing Merlin at work again. “He won't be so petty as to ask to change teams, but working side by side with Merlin today won't be easy.”

Nope. That’s not petty at all. If fact, it would solve ALL your problems because you and Merlin would be able to get back together. Why are people stupid in these things? I know we have to have drama but it could at least be believable.

After worrying about facing Merlin, Arthur randomly answers Afallach again, “No, it's enough, we're going back.” Well, at least that one makes more sense as an answer. Isn’t this person supposed to be Arthur’s bodyguard? Why isn’t he in better shape? I feel like Arthur should look into getting someone more capable to look after him.

Pictured: Arthur’s Highly Trained Body Guard

Apparently.

When Arthur gets home, Morgana is there. She is furious because she’s called Arthur 20 times and he didn’t answer. “Arthur points a finger at his sister. ‘That's exactly why I didn't pick up. The last thing I need is frantic anything.’”

I thought Morgana was his cousin? Well this is European royalty we’re talking about so I guess she could be both.

Need I say more?

Morgana was clearly worried about Arthur and Arthur tells her he wasn’t in the mood to talk. Wtf, Arthur? If your sister-cousin calls you 20 times you could at least text her back to make sure no one died. He’s super bitchy to her so she leaves.

After he showers and he changes into his uniform, he thinks about how he usually changes at work but he can’t make himself today because changing in front of Merlin would make him think of sexy times. Do these places not have bathrooms or something? Or he could just go in early.

“At work he runs into many familiar faces. Though he doesn't feel like it, he greets everyone with a kind word. Partly because he can't be rude to people without a scandal happening.” Or maybe you shouldn’t be rude for no reason because that’s just not how anyone should behave ever?

Arthur goes to wherever Merlin is hanging out. “All in all, he still looks great, as beautiful to Arthur as he is impossible to reach out for. And isn't that a pain on top of all the other ones?”

It’s been like three days, Arthur, not three years, or even three months. How much could you have possibly expected him to change?

“He's saved from doing anything stupid by Gwen entering. ‘Merlin, Arthur, we've got a code blue.’” Is it actually a Code Blue this time? “’We're on our way,’ Merlin says, taut, serious, focused on the job at hand. He oozes professionalism like the Saxe-Coburgs drip old-world stateliness. ‘We'll get him to hospital in under twenty.’” That is in no way enough time to save someone in a Code Blue. They get into the helicopter and Arthur turns on their communication stuff. “Here Foxtrot Hotel, we have a major trauma, Helimed 54. Gunshot wound.” So not an actual Code Blue.

“Even though he means not to watch over them, Arthur strains to see overboard. He needs to know that Gwaine and Merlin are landing safely. He doesn't stop clutching hard at the controls until after they've touched ground.” I mean, I’m pretty sure it’s a job requirement for you to watch them to make sure they are safe, but ok.

“Gwaine reads them out quickly. ‘Sats are 82, going down. BP 110 over 95. He looks stable.’” An O2 saturation of 82 is NOT stable, Gwaine. Merlin tells Gwaine to bag the patient to get the O2 Sat up (see: not stable) and Merlin tells Arthur to land and come help them because the patient is not flailing all over the place. THIS IS WHY YOU NEED MORE THAN TWO PEOPLE ON A RESCUE TEAM.

“Arthur can't really do anything but, not only because Merlin's team leader, and as such has a right to order them about, but because he can't leave Merlin in the lurch like that. It's an instinct stronger than he is. Though that won't change how things are between them, this is a natural reaction to him, one he can't put a stop to. It doesn't mean he's going soft on Merlin. It won't happen ever again. But this he must do. For Merlin. For the patient.” What the hell? Why are people so dramatic? Your teammates and a victim of a gunshot are in trouble. OF COURSE YOU WOULD HELP THEM. If not, that makes you a terrible person.

Oh.

Drink.

Arthur goes and holds down the patient so Merlin could do whatever it is that he does. Incorrectly. As per usual. Why aren’t they sedating him? Just give him some Ativan, IM and he’ll calm down.

Merlin has Gwaine get IV access and for some reason, makes him set up a transfusion of O- blood. Merlin does another GCS and I disagree with his assessment but I don’t care to be specific about it.

“’Gotcha. There's a small exit wound consistent with a gunshot. He's not bleeding profusely and I can see no evidence of a haemorrhage…’” So… why did Merlin set up a blood transfusion when the patient isn’t losing blood? There is such a thing as having too much blood in a person’s system and that’s not a good thing. Fluids would have been a much better decision but for some reason, Merlin has an aversion to giving them. Like Professor Cave Fiasco. Dude was hemorrhaging like crazy and Merlin didn’t set up any IV fluids. That would have even been a time where a transfusion would have been an option but Merlin didn’t do that either. Merlin is literally the shittiest doctor ever.

And then… “A shadow moves over them. When Arthur looks up it's to see a man standing over them. He's young, so much so that a goatee struggles to grow on his chin. He's got a baseball cap on his head, a gun in his hand. ‘Stop it,’ he says. ‘Let him die.’” Why are there no police on the scene here? A gun fired in the middle of a protest and the police don’t show up? REALLY?

Merlin of course talks to the gunman, “don’t throw away your life, blah, blah, blah.”

He already did that when he shot this dude, Merlin. Keep up.

“Arthur's convinced the madman's going to shoot. Heir to the throne or no, he's preparing to place himself in front of Merlin, when the gunman curses, tosses the gun away and takes off at a run. Gwaine skids off to get the pistol. ‘How the hell do you engage the safety on this cursed thing?’” Every time it’s mentioned that Arthur is the prince, I kind of think, “Oh yeah. I forgot about that…” Which I kind of like because it means we see more of Arthur the person rather than The Prince of Wales. I don’t know why but Gwaine’s response is actually killing me. Thanks for the laugh in the middle of all this nonsense, Gwaine. I appreciate it. Oh and just want to mention Arthur willing to plant himself in front of Merlin and get shot for him. That just proves my point from earlier that them breaking up solved nothing and just served to give us some angst.

“’Give,’ Arthur says, toggling the lever to off. ‘I'll radio the police.’” Why has this not already been done though? Someone started shooting up a protest and the police aren’t there? What? Damn though, take charge, Arthur.

“’Hyper-resonance on the left side,’ Merlin says, auscultating the wounded man. ‘I suspect a pneumo.’”

NOTHING ABOUT THIS IS CORRECT. YOU CANNOT AUSCULTATE HYPERRESONANCE. THAT’S NOT A THING. Hyperresonance is heard with PERCUSSION in a pneumothorax. ABSENCE OF SOUND is heard with auscultation of a pneumothorax. I don’t get how the author has clearly spent time researching but still gets super basic things incorrect that would have come up in their googling of this stuff.

Merlin places a chest tube. I hate those things. I’ve never seen one in real life before and I hope not to.

Arthur takes them to the hospital and has a crisis, imagining Merlin as the patient. Sure. Whatever happened to the gunman? Did the police ever show up?

After they get back to base, there’s a tense moment between Merlin and Arthur and then Arthur runs away for sadness reasons.

Chapter 15

Merlin and Gwaine are at a party. Merlin is slamming beers. Anne Rice pops in for her usual, “He's lost, adrift, purposeless. There's a sadness that tears at his heart day after day, gnaws at it till nothing but bloody stripes of flesh and muscle remain.” Merlin tells Gwaine he is only there for Finna. How many retirement parties is this chick going to have? One and done, Finna. One and done. Arthur is also there even though I don’t think he’s ever met Finna and Merlin is bitchy about it, asking why he’s there. Which is a fair question to me. “’Same thing you're doing.’ Gwaine rounds on Merlin, eyes narrowed. ‘Since when you've got a beef with the Swan Prince?’” Is this supposed to be a Swan Princess reference? If so, I approve.

“’Don't be silly.’ Merlin stands. He needs a drink, be it one of alcohol free ones Finna keeps for those of her guests who prefer not to cloud their senses. As an ex pilot, she's sensitive to those things. ‘You're talking rubbish.’” Or maybe she’s just a regular person throwing a party and knows that not everyone drinks? That has nothing to do with being a pilot.

“He's upending empty cans of cola in search of a full one, when a hand lands on the same one he wanted, touching his into the brgain. He looks up and then his whole palm burns. ‘Arthur.’” Of course it’s Arthur. IDK what “brgain” is a typo for but it’s making me laugh all the same. Arthur tells Merlin he was going to give the soda to Gwen. I’m calling it now: Merlin is going to misinterpret their friendship for a romantic relationship, drama and angst will ensue.

Behind the scenes fun fact: I was originally going to go for a more “dramatic, throwing one’s self on their bed, angst” sort of gif but this one is more representative of how I feel about my prediction.

“He did this to protect them, to cut things off before his feelings for Arthur could take such seed he couldn't extricate them from the weave of him, to shield himself from a loss that would be unbearable. Arthur is so dear that losing him for good, to death, would put an end to Merlin too. ‘She... she deserves it.’”

Oh and I’m calling that a win for my prediction because Merlin is clearly not talking about the soda when he says that.

Gwaine is following Merlin around asking him what the fuck is going on with him. He thinks Merlin is just super stressed out and suggests he takes some time off work. “’Gwaine.’ Merlin takes Gwaine's hand in his and clings tight. His work is vital to him, the threat of it being taken away makes him tremble with near fear. ‘Gwaine, I'm fine.’” Calm yourself, Merlin.

No one is taking your job away from you but if you’re impaired, you can’t work. Think of your patients.

“Gwaine holds his gaze. ‘That's exactly what people say before they have a breakdown.’” LOL I love Gwaine in this.  “’I'm not having a breakdown.’ At least not a mental one.” You’re having a physical breakdown, Merlin? You need to get to a hospital ASAP then. You’ll die.

Merlin and Gwaine continue their conversation and Arthur comes in from nowhere, “’It looks to me as though Gwaine was being a bit too rough,’ Arthur says, eyes wide and full with emotion. ‘I won't have that.’”

Oh fucking hell. I was hoping to get through this without Caveman Arthur protecting poor defenseless Damsel Merlin. Gwaine figures it all out because he isn’t a total idiot.

Merlin wants to “explain” and Gwaine says there’s no need because, duh. I have to paste this entire next part because holy crap the unnecessary drama:

“’I acknowledge it openly.’ Arthur's voice is firm and decisive. ‘There's no need to hide—‘‘Arthur!’ For himself, Merlin has no wish to hide anything. It's true that all questions will be painful, like fire under skin, but he can bear that now's the cat's out of the bag. He's a big boy. Besides, Gwaine's mischievous but never malicious. Any joke he might aim at Merlin would be well meant in the end. All Merlin's concern is for Arthur. For him a fling would mean being splashed on the front pages of more than one rag. It would be a scandal. It would also be for nothing because they're not together anymore. It would do all the damage without any of the perks. Merlin doesn't want that for him. ‘You can't.’ ‘I can and I will,’ Arthur tells him with a pointed glance that softens the more he looks. ‘It may be in the past but I don't intend to hide like a thief in the night.’”

This is so weird. It’s just admitting it to Gwaine and he already knows so I don’t get why Merlin is being all, “NO YOU CAN’T!!!” And, “It may be in the past but I don’t intend to hide like a thief in the night.” What? Just… what? IT’S GWAINE. Not a press conference. These people are way too dramatic about everything. This is just so excessive.

“Merlin knew that talking about it would flay him open. But the experience of it is exquisitely more hurtful than any prediction might have suggested. Eyes getting heavy with a sheen of tears he doesn't mean to shed, he says. ‘Yeah.’”

I’m actually laughing at this quote. What? Gwaine excuses himself from this nonsense, like anyone would.

“’Look, I'm sorry about the Gwaine thing.’ Arthur places a hand on Merlin's shoulder and gets him walking. ‘I didn't mean for him to guess. If I could, I would have safeguarded your privacy with all that I had.’” So Arthur is doing the thing he accused Gwaine of doing earlier by putting his hands on Merlin to move him the direction he wants him to go. But it’s ok because it’s Arthur. No. I hate this. I hate this trope so fucking much.

They start to have a conversation about their relationship. It’s dramatic. I don’t care. Then Gwen comes in like a wrecking ball, as she should, to stop this nonsense.

Thanks, Gwen.

“’Arthur,’ Gwen calls out from among the crowd of party goers. She's got a newspaper in her hands. From the splash of red on its front page it's clear it's The Sun. ‘I've just got this from Drea.’ She points at their colleague. It's about you, Arthur.’ Arthur snatches the paper from Gwen. Reading over Arthur's shoulder, Merlin makes out the words: Exclusive: Ex Con Nearly Kills Heir to Throne.’”

GOOD

That’s it for this post. I hate this excessive drama. It really bugs me because it’s over something so easily solved. Merlin continues to be the most incompetent medical professional ever. I love that Arthur’s personal body guard is terrible at physical exercise. He’d never be able to save Arthur if someone ran off with him. Did we ever actually find out what Finna’s party was for? And why Arthur was there?

Until Next Time:

#merlin #bbc merlin #merlin fic #review #rotrude #everyone is incompetent #Finna needs to stop having retirement parties #we get it #you don't work there anymore #angst #Anne Rice Language #must