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petitelepus · 8 months

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FOX'S WEDDING, PART 19

KITSUNE!RENGUKO KYOJURO X FEM!READER

Summary: It's your big day, the wedding day. Kyojuro and you finally become husband and wife and you celebrate your new status as a married couple in your own hotel room.

Warnings: SMUT HALFWAY DOWN

A/N: Female Reader, Kitsune Kyojuro, Kitsune Senjuro, Kitsune Rengoku, Monster Musume!AU, Kitsune Shinjuro, Kitsune Ruka, Slime Mitsuri, Papillion Shinobu, Alraune Kanae, Lizardman Obanai

PART 1 II PART 2 II PART 3 II PART 4 II PART 5 II PART 6 II PART 7 II PART 8 II PART 9 II PART 10 II PART 11 II PART 12 II PART 13 II PART 14 II PART 15 II PART 16 II PART 17 II PART 18 II PART 19

It was finally here. The day of your wedding.

When you woke up you were feeling nervous, but also happy and excited. By the same time the next morning, you would be Miss Rengoku and married to the man or rather a fox of your dreams.

One tradition you and Kyojuro wanted to cling to was that you wouldn't see each other for a couple of days until your wedding. While Kyojuro stayed back at your shared home, you had gone to stay in the same hotel as your fiance's parents stayed during their stay. That way you could get ready in peace and didn't need to worry too much.

You ate a small breakfast at the hotel's morning buffet, not wanting to gorge yourself sick right at the start of the biggest and most important day in your whole life. After taking a bath, a hairdresser and makeup artist came and started to prepare you for your upcoming ceremony. While the hairdresser was blowdrying your hair, you almost missed how someone knocked on your door.

"Please come in, the door is unlocked!" You called and the door opened and your mother-in-law and own mother stepped into the room. You gasped when you saw your mother in a modest black yet pretty kimono. You asked the hairdresser to turn the hairdryer off for a second so you could speak with the two mothers.

"Mom!" You exclaimed and the said woman smiled as she looked down at the dark dress she was wearing, "How do I look?"

"You look great Mom!"

"See?" Ruka smiled at your mother, "I told you how you are beautiful."

"Thank you," Your mother nodded and you looked at her up and down, "How does it feel, wearing a kimono?"

"A little tight, but I suppose it should be that way?" She asked and Ruka, your fiance's mother nodded, "But not too tight, I hope?"

"Oh no, nothing I can't handle!" Your mother lifted her head proudly and you chuckled lightly. Ruka, chuckled a little also and turned her attention to you, "How are you feeling, my dear daughter-in-law? Nervous?"

"Very," You admitted with a small laugh, "I mean… Soon I'll be married to your son?"

"A fact that brings me great honor and even greater happiness." Ruka nodded and you blinked, "Wait, really?"

"Yes," She smiled, "You accepted my sons, taught them a lot, and made them both so happy, but especially my eldest. A mother's greatest joy is to see her children happy."

"It's true." Your mother turned to look at you, "My little girl, I haven't seen you this happy in years."

"Ah, I guess that is true?" You wondered, but who you were kidding? Your life before Kyojuro was just waiting for days, months, and even years to just pass you by. You were never really living to your fullest or enjoying life…

But that was before the Rengoku brothers came into your life and changed it. It was really true, Kyojuro had brought you so much joy and now you were doing to marry that source of joy.

"Uh, pardon…?"

You and the older women turned to look and the hairdresser and makeup artist looked at you, "Pardon us, but we must hurry now if you want to make it to the wedding venue?"

"Ah, yes!" You nodded as you sat back down and let the professionals use their magic and skills on you. While you were being prepared, your mother and Ruka sat aside to chat a little.

You tried to listen from afar what they were talking about, but the women tending your hair and face kept telling you how beautiful they were going to make you so you didn't really hear what your mother and mother-in-law talked about.

Soon, once you were done came the time for you to put on the beautiful white kimono set. Despite loving the traditional Japanese style, you had no real idea how to wear one so you happily let the professionals dress you.

"Wow…!"

"Oh my," You heard the women in the room gasp and you turned to look at your mother and Kyojuro's mother, "How do I look?"

"Beautiful," They both said as they motioned you to turn around and you did so and saw yourself in the mirror.

"Wow…!" You were stunned at the sight of you in the traditional white kimono. You looked absolutely gorgeous. Beautiful yet gracious. "Is that really me…?"

"You're beautiful," Ruka said and your mother smiled as she carefully wiped her eyes, "I might cry."

"Mom, if you cry then I will also!" You laughed a little and everyone smiled, knowing that the time to leave was there.

"It's time to go." Your mother said and you nodded as you turned to leave, but Ruka stopped you, "Please hold on."

You looked at the fox woman and she took out the white cowl called wataboshi and gently placed it over your head, "Now you're ready."

"Thank you," You nodded and the three of you left the hotel. You couldn't help but wonder where you were heading since the wedding venue had been a secret for you. You knew that the ceremony would be held with only you and Kyojuro and your closest family members, but the wedding party was open to your friends also.

"Do you know where the wedding is held?" You asked curiously and the two mothers smiled, "You will know soon."

You quirked a brow but didn't ask. The drive wasn't too bad, but you had no idea where you really were when the car finally stopped. The driver came to open the door for you and you stepped outside-!

"Holy-!" You gasped as you saw the red gate called Torii from the Japanese religion standing there, in the middle of the gorgeous park, surrounded by trees with yellow, orange, and red leaves. The whole place was honestly so beautiful.

"How…?"

"A wedding gift from me." Came a familiar voice and you turned around to see Mister Smith himself looking at you.

"Mister Smith!" You gasped and the man lowered his sunglasses enough to wink at you, "My, you look gorgeous, soon-to-be Miss Rengoku."

"How did you do this?" You were absolutely stunned and the man laughed as he pulled his glasses over his eyes again, "I pulled some strings I had to make this happen. Anything for our bond between Japan's extraspecies and Demihumans. Speaking of…"

"My beloved?"

You yelped as you turned around and saw Kyojuro standing there, in a traditional black kimono, looking at you with those gorgeous eyes of his wide open. You stared him right back with your own eyes, and by God, he was handsome. The two of you were so mesmerized by each other that you didn't notice your parents and brothers reunite.

"You look gorgeous." Kyojuro said with a smile and you nodded shyly, "And you look so handsome."

Honestly, you could have stared at each other for hours, if it wasn't for Mister Smith clearing his throat.

"Great, now, there is a photographer there ready to take portraits of you all before the ceremony starts!"

"Ah, yes!" You nodded and you and Kyojuro walked to each other. The urge to kiss your fiance was so strong, but you fought against the urge as hard as you could. Soon enough you would kiss each other last time as a couple and the first time as an actual married couple.

"Congratulations on your wedding. I knew you were meant for each other." The human agent smiled and you and your fiance smiled at him.

"Thank you, Mister Smith." Both you and Kyojuro thanked the man from the bottom of your hearts, "We wouldn't have met if it wasn't for you."

"Nah, it was all fate, you two." The man grinned as he fixed his sunglasses, "I just helped it a little, that's all."

Ah, such a modest and humble man. You and Kyojuro smiled as you went to get your pictures taken by the beautiful fall surroundings. You never liked having your pictures taken, but when the photographer showed you some of his pictures, you were taken aback by how good you looked standing next to this gorgeous Kitsune.

But the prettiest pictures were the ones where you looked at each other adoringly with such love in your eyes. You both had your pictures taken with your families before the ceremony time was closing in.

"Our ceremony starts soon," Kyojuro said and you nodded humbly, "It really does."

"Are you ready to become Miss Rengoku?" He asked with such an honest smile and you confessed happily, "I've never been this ready before in my life."

"Then, shall we go and get married?" The Kitsune asked, his smile growing huge and you returned his smile with one of your own as you offered your hand to him, "Take me there?"

Your fiance smiled wider as he gently took your hand and walked with you to the small temple reserved for your Japanese Shinto ceremony.

Your parents and brothers were already there, and you, Kyojuro, and your families were led to the temple by the Shinto priest and two shrine maidens that Mister Smith had asked to perform your ceremony, requested by your fiance's parents.

As you entered the small temple, your families split, your parents and brothers sitting on one side of the room and Kyojuro's parents and brother sitting on the other side.

You all started with the Purification Rite aka Shubatsu. Every attendance stood and bowed to be symbolically purified before they took seats… Except for you and Kyojuro.

The two of you stood in front of the shrine's altar as the priest announced the marriage of you and your fiance, and the guests got up and bowed again, just like Ruka had taught your family to do.

Just like your family, you tried your hardest to follow the traditions. You did as you had seen people do in the traditional Japanese wedding videos that Kyojuro had shown to you, following every step carefully and precisely.

It was time to do San-san-kudo where you and your fiance were offered small cups of sake. You raised the cup to your lips thrice but didn't drink the sake until the third time. You didn't like strong drinks so you tried your hardest not to grimace at the taste of pure strong sake.

The priest said something in Japanese that you didn't quite understand, but thanks to your practice, you knew what was going to happen. Kyojuro cleared his throat as he reached for his dark kimono's sleeve and pulled out his wedding vow. For some reason that you couldn't quite understand only he was required to write one.

"My beloved bride, I am so thankful that we met," He started calmly, "You accepted me and my brother without any distrust, you taught us so much and you loved us so much. Words can't begin to describe how much I love you, and how I adore you for being yourself."

You smiled silently and Kyojuro returned your smile, "You're my sun, my Goddess, and my beloved. Life without you would be like life without colors, boring and lifeless. With you in my life, all the colors are bright and cheerful and full of life."

Oh no, you felt your eyes sting and burn as tears rose to your eyes. Carefully, you wiped your eyes so you wouldn't ruin your makeup. You knew Kyojuro could be romantic but when did he become so poetic also?

"As we got to know each other, I knew we were meant for one another and here we are now, promising each other to one another for the rest of our lives… And I couldn't be happier."

He put the paper down and gently grasped your hands in his as he smiled, "So please accept my confession and take me as yours?"

Okay, maybe you shed one tear, but you quickly wiped off any evidence as you smiled and nodded, "That would be my honor."

After the vow, you moved on to presenting the Sakaki Branch, which was a ritual representing the safe end of the ceremony. You and Kyojuro got sakaki branches from the shrine maidens and you placed them on the altar before bowing twice and clapping twice.

Finally, it was time to exchange the rings you and Kyojuro had gotten for each other. The Kitsune was all smiles as he gently took your left hand and put the beautiful ring on your ring finger. You returned the gesture, taking his hand and putting the ring on his hand and finally, you were married.

It was time for your families to toast and the shrine maidens split, one serving sake for your side of the family while the other one served sake for Shinjuro and Ruka since Senjuro couldn't drink. Once everyone had their cups of sake, they took a sip and the ceremony was over.

"So?" Kyojuro smiled at you, "Are you ready to celebrate our marriage, my beloved wife?"

"Say that again," You grinned and his smile just grew, "My beloved wife."

"My loving husband," You said right back to him and Kyojuro looked like he could burst with joy. The two of you turned and left the shrine, your families following you to the cars that would take you to the location of your wedding party.

While you were on your way, you removed your cowl and let your husband see you without it. The fox's smile never wavered as he looked at you, his darling wife.

"You're beautiful," He said, and you smiled, "And you are handsome."

"May I kiss you?"

"Wait, you want our first kiss as a married couple to happen in the car?"

"True!" He nodded, "I want everyone to see how much I love you!"

"Aww…!"

He was such a cutie. Once you made it to the party place, a lovely lounge, your family and the rest of your guests aka friends were already there. The moment you stepped outside of the car your friends cheered and thanks to them you felt like you were a celebrity walking on the red carpet.

"Congratulations!" People cheered together and you and Kyojuro were all smiles as you looped your arm around his and you entered the lounge reserved only for your wedding party. Time seemed to fly by when you were by your husband's side. You had dinner and you noticed that everything you ate seemed to taste better when you heard Kyojuro shout TASTY after each bite of his roasted sweet potatoes.

There was an open bar, but you stayed away from that after remembering the small hangover you had after the night last week when you had been talking and drinking with your father-in-law. You took notice that the bar was barely used and that even Shinjuro was staying away from it.

Even if you didn't remember exactly what you were talking about, you liked to believe that the two of you had bonded that night when you talked.

After the dinner, you, your fiance, and the guests were ready to party!

You and Kyojuro started the party with your very first dance together as a married couple and the two of you couldn't take your eyes off each other as the gentle music played in the background. At the end of the song, the two of you shared your first kiss with each other as a married couple and people cheered for the two of you.

The party started and people were talking and getting to know each other and you couldn't be any happier.

"My, what a cute first kiss!" Came a familiar voice and you turned to see your best friends from the botanical garden.

"Kanae, and Shinobu!" You smiled as you made your way to greet your dear friends. The sisters smiled at you and bowed in respect.

"Congratulations our dear friend!" Kanae smiled and Shinobu nodded, "You're married now. How do you feel?"

"Honestly, like there are butterflies in my stomach," You laughed as you glanced at the Shinobu's beautiful butterfly wings. Your answer made the sisters chuckle.

"We are happy that you invited us to your wedding, even if you didn't need bridesmaids after all." Shinobu said and Kanae continued, "You look so good in that kimono. Pure as fresh snow."

"He he, thank you!" You were very happy to hear that from them, but then the look in the sisters' eyes changed and they leaned closer to whisper so no one else could hear you guys, "So, wedding night, right?"

"Any big plans?"

"Other than bananas?"

Oh my God, you were both horrified and so thankful that they had the modesty to lean close to say that so others wouldn't hear. You blushed as you covered your face, "Why did I ever tell you about that night?"

"Because we are best friends." The sisters smiled as they giggled, "But honestly, we are rooting for you."

"Me too!" Came a cheerful voice and you turned to see Mitsuri herself, the lovely and kind pink slime running at you.

"Mitsuri!" You smiled as the slime hugged you, oh God she was so soft, and you returned her hug. "You came!"

"Of course!" She smiled excitedly as she pulled away, "Thank you for the invite, it made me so happy!"

"I'm happy you came!" You nodded and someone cleared their throat. You turned to look and saw the white-scaled lizardman from the Zoo standing there behind the pink slime. That's when you remembered that Mitsuri and he were dating.

"Hi there," You greeted him, "It was Obanai, right?"

"I see Mitsuri has told you about us…" The lizardman mumbled as he glanced at his girlfriend, who was all smiles as she looked at her beloved. Her loving gaze reminded you so much of Kyojuro. You wondered if you looked as adorable as she did when you looked at your husband.

"Congratulations." Obanai nodded quietly as he turned to leave the conversation and Mitsuri followed after him, waving at you, "Congrats one more time!"

"Thank you, both of you!" You called after her and her quiet boyfriend before turning to talk with the Alraune and Papillion, who were both smiling.

"Young love," Kanae chuckled and Shinobu nodded, "So pure."

"It is," You nodded before you noticed movement from the corner of your eye and turned to see the husband of yours making his way to you.

"My beloved wife!" Kyojuro smiled as he stopped by your side and looked at the demihuman sisters, "You came! Marvelous!"

"We wouldn't have missed your wedding day no matter what," Shinobu said and her words made you and your beloved happy. You both thanked her and you turned to look at your dear husband, "How is everything?"

"Amazing, but I think it's time for us to cut the cake!"

"Already?" You raised your brow in a questioning manner, but Kyojuro's smile just widened.

"You see…" He leaned close to whisper to your ear, "I can't wait to make love to my beloved wife any longer than I have to."

You were so shocked by what you heard that it took a second or two for you to actually understand what he had just said, but you blushed furiously once you realized what he had said to you.

"My, cake time?" Kanae smiled and her sister nodded, "We are looking forward to it."

"Not as much as I am!" Kyojuro laughed as he wrapped his arm over your shoulders and started to walk with you to the center of the room where the three-layered cake was brought. It was an impressive cake with dark red candy flowers all around it and it was your favorite, chocolate flavored.

People were taking pictures as you and Kyojuro took the knife and together cut the very first piece out of the cake. You didn't smash the cake on each other's faces like some people did during their weddings, no, you kindly opened your mouths and carefully fed each other the cake.

It was absolutely delicious but you couldn't truly enjoy the cake's rich chocolaty flavor. Not when your mind was full of images of Kyojuro and you sharing the bed and doing things you hadn't done ever before…!

After the cake, everything was a blur to you. You talked with your family, got congratulated by your brothers and even Ruka told you how well you had followed the traditions. You understood everything told to you and everything you said back, but the time flew by quickly and before you noticed, you were in the car on your way to your honeymoon suite.

"My beloved wife, how are you feeling?" Kyojuro asked and you flinched, finally snapping out of your mind. You looked at him and smiled, "I'm… I'm not going to lie, but I feel nervous."

"I see," He nodded, "About what I said earlier?"

"Yes," You admitted and your husband smiled as he gently leaned down and kissed your temple, "Please do not fear my beloved, because I will not do anything you aren't comfortable with."

"I know and I trust you, you silly fox." You smiled as you took his hand and kissed the back of it, "I trust you and love you so much you don't even know."

"Enough to marry me," He grinned and you giggled, "Yes, and enough to show you just how much I love you."

Kyojuro's fox ears twitched, a sign he was feeling happy and he asked, "May I kiss you?"

"You don't need to even ask." You replied happily as the two of you leaned forward so your lips met in a simple but still loving kiss. You would have probably kissed more than that, but you were finally at the hotel where your suite was waiting for you… And what a gorgeous room it was.

The bed was huge, easily one of the biggest you've ever seen, and absolutely covered with rose petals. The windows were hidden behind dark red curtains and the bathroom had an enormous tub there, alongside so many different soaps and scents and such.

"Wow, this is easily one of the best hotel rooms I've been in." You were awed as you looked around and Kyojuro chuckled, "Only the best for the stunning wife!"

"Or perfect husband," You grinned as you made your way to your beloved and gently pressed the palms of your hands against his clothed chest, "Shall we get rid of these clothes?"

"Yes, my beloved!" Kyojuro helped you to undo many layers of the white kimono you were wearing and then you moved to remove his dark clothes. Finally, the two of you stood there in front of each other, only in your underwear.

God, Kyojuro looked gorgeous, his body was like a work of art. This was barely fair how good he looked when compared to you. You were fine with your body, but what about Kyojuro? Would he like-!

"You're gorgeous," He chased away all your fears and you smiled as you sat on the edge of the bed and patted the empty spot next to you, "Come and kiss me?"

Kyojuro absolutely bounced on the bed, making you nearly bounce off if he hadn't caught you. He moved you with such ease, twirling you around and over until you were finally lying beneath his body as he held himself over yours. His hair was so long, it hung like a curtain around you.

"May I-?"

"Yes," You said as you grabbed his face and pulled him down to kiss you. There was nothing innocent in that kiss of yours, as soon as your lips touched you were both goners. Your tongues pressed against each other, dancing passionately together and your hands started to wander.

His chest was rock hard under your soft fingers and you silently thanked him for all the workouts he did daily. Kyojuro was still using his arms to hold himself up, but you grabbed one and greedily put his hand over your breast. The man groaned against your mouth and you moaned as you felt him squeeze your breast over your bra.

That thing had to go.

You pulled apart from the kiss and carefully used your hands on Kyojuro's chest to push him up until he was sitting. The Kitsune was confused and about to ask if he did something wrong, but you quickly undid your bra with your clever fingers and threw it aside, uncovering your breasts.

"Touch me…" You moaned and Kyojuro did as you told him to, quickly leaning back over you to kiss you and fondle your breasts. God, you were so soft, the Kitsune could feel all his blood heading down between his legs as his manhood got harder the more he touched you.

Kyojuro wasn't the only one getting turned on. Your body felt hot and you could feel your sex getting slick with your arousal. You rubbed your thighs together in a sad attempt to relieve the aching in your wet core, but you only made things worse for yourself.

Suddenly, your husband pulled away from the kiss and moved down to take one of your nipples into his mouth. You sighed softly as you felt him suck on your nipple, making it harden in his mouth, and once hard, he bit you gently.

"Ah, Kyojuro…!" You gasped and your hands went to tangle into his hair, but then you noticed his fox's ears and you got curious. What would happen if you touched them?

Carefully, you grabbed his ear with one hand and the reaction was instant. Kyojuro groaned against your breast and his hips bucked, rubbing his hard-on on the soft bedding. You blinked before you turned mischievous and you started to rub the base of his ear before gently pinching the tip and the voices your husband made were just so sinful.

"Careful there…!" Kyojuro groaned as he pulled off from your breast, "My ears are sensitive…!"

"I can see that," You chuckled as you gently rubbed them and your husband actually growled as he sneaked his hand down until his fingers touched the wet spot on your panties and pressed against it.

You yelped as your hips bucked this time, pressing forward, eager to feel more of your lover's touch. Kyojruo could feel against his fingers how wet you were and he was honestly so happy that you were also feeling good and not just him.

"May I take them off?" He asked and you blinked, "Whose?"

"Both."

"Ah," You nodded, "Yes."

With your blessing, Kyojuro kicked off his boxers and pulled down your panties. As soon as the little pieces of clothing were gone, his fingers immediately went back between your legs and your hips bucked and you yelped as you felt him circle your wet sex with one finger before pressing it inside.

"Ngh!" You winched and your husband stilled immediately, "Did I hurt you?"

"No…" You lied a little before shaking your head slowly as you panted, "Feel different when it's someone else…!"

"I'm going to slow down," Kyojuro said and you nodded but as soon as he even moved his finger, your hands snapped to cover your mouth, and stop the embarrassing noises from surfacing.

"Please, my beloved, don't hide those pretty sounds you are making."

"They're embarrassing…" You whined and he smiled, "Not to me. I love hearing how I'm making you feel good so please don't hide?"

"Ah…" You moved your hands from your mouth and as soon as you did that Kyojuro pulled his finger nearly all the way out before gently thrusting it back inside.

You were whimpering and panting as you felt his finger rub your insides. Just then, you felt him insert another finger, gently stretching you open as he thrust them in and out and then scissoring them.

By the time he inserted his third finger, you were a needy wreck, wanting and needing him to fuck you. How could he be so patient? This man was a saint.

"Enough!" You cried out, "Please Kyojuro, I need you…"

"Are you certain?" He asked and you nodded furiously, "Yes, please please please, don't make me beg…!"

Kyojuro was pretty sure you were already begging but he didn't say anything about it. Instead, he pulled his fingers out of you and licked his fingers clean, much to your embarrassment.

"TASTY!"

"Kyojuro…!" You whined and the man chuckled as he reached for his cock, but then he remembered that he needed a condom.

"Condom-!" He said and you blinked, stunned. You expected that he would want to do you without one, but he was thoughtful and so loving and it filled you with warm feelings. You were totally ready to let him fuck you without one, but then you both looked up, and sure enough, there was a packet of condoms and lube resting on the nightstand.

"At least this hotel comes prepared," You chuckled a little and Kyojuro laughed also as he reached for the packet and pulled out one condom that he rolled over his manhood. You hadn't seen his manhood since your blowjob and you didn't remember it being so big, but you could remember wrong.

Kyojuro squeezed a generous amount of lube into his hand before absolutely soaking his cock in it. Once he was done with that, he positioned himself between your legs and pressed the tip of his cock between your sex's lips, but he didn't penetrate you yet.

He looked at you and kissed your forehead, "Are you ready?"

"Yes, please, Kyojuro…" You sighed and he nodded as he carefully pushed forward until he popped inside and you winched but kept quiet by biting your lip. It felt tight but good. No real pain whatsoever thanks to your husband's preparation, but you felt pressure.

Slowly Kyojuro filled you all the way and you could tell he was keeping himself back by the way he was biting his own lip and groaning. He wanted to make sure you got used to his generous girth, which you did quickly and you whined beneath him, "My husband, please move…!"

"Yes, my wife…!" He growled as he grabbed your hips with his hands and pulled a little over halfway out before snapping his hips forward and sinking himself completely into you.

You cried out in sudden pleasure and Kyojuro growled as he took that pace, fucking you fast and eagerly. It felt so good, his cock was almost immediately hitting that soft spot inside you that had you seeing stars, and the way his cock massaged your inner walls left you breathless.

While fucking you, Kyojuro leaned down and pressed his lips against yours and you both immediately deepened the kiss, your tongues working together to bring you even more pleasure.

"So good-!" Your husband groaned as you pulled apart from the kiss to catch your breath, "My wife, you feel so good!"

"Kyojuro…!" You gasped breathlessly as you lovingly watched the focused look on his face. It looked to you that it was almost like he was holding himself back.

"Kyojuro…! Please, don't hold back-!" You whined, "Fuck me like you want!"

"My love…!" The Kitsune panted as he fixed his hold on you and with the new hold he managed to press his thump against your neglected and aching clit.

The reaction was instant. You threw your head back as you cried out in pleasure, your hips bucking against Kyojuro's and your sex tightening around him to the point it was almost painful.

You were getting close and so was the fox husband of yours. You knew it, you felt the orgasm coming. You just needed a little more…!

"I love you," Kyojuro suddenly said and you blinked as you registered his words. He smiled, "I love you, I love you so much!"

"Kyojuro-!" You gasped, "I love you!"

The two of you kissed and the time ran out and your body came undone beneath your husband. Pleasure wrecked your body and your sex squeezed so hard around Kyojuro's manhood that you coaxed him into cumming as well, the condom catching his release

The two of you were panting as you slowly came down from your high. You were both looking at each other so lovingly and you shared a quick kiss.

"You're amazing." You whispered against his lips and the Kitsune grinned, "You're gorgeous."

Your giggle was cut off by a tired moan as your husband pulled his manhood out of you, took the condom, tied it, and threw it on the floor to be cleaned later on. The man moved swiftly as he pulled a blanket over you and his naked body and you immediately snuggled against his warm body.

"Thank you Kyojuro." You thanked him and the man smiled, "For what?"

"For choosing me." You said and he grinned as he kissed the top of your head, "Thank you for accepting me."

Ah, could you two be any more in love? You enjoyed each other's company when you realized something.

"So… We are leaving tomorrow to go to Japan?" You asked and Kyojuro nodded, "That's what my parents want."

"And we are staying at your place?"

"Most likely, yes."

"I don't know if I'm able to have sex in your childhood home or that close to your parents." You said as you were afraid that you would be too loud and one of his parents would walk in on you two.

Kyojuro smiled, "I understand, so no worries."

"So…?" You looked at him and he blinked, "So?"

"Would you fuck me until I can't walk?"

Kyojuro raised his brow in a questioning manner and you pouted, "What, I'll be seated on a 10-hour flight to Japan so it's not like I need to walk tomorrow, right?"

"I understand your reasoning!" He nodded happily as he kissed your temple and reached for another condom, "Round 2 it is!"

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luminary-of-the-marz · 4 months

Note

Hello! You have been chosen.

Give me your favorite lotf ship/character hcs.

Have a good day!

-❤️anon

Omgee yay I’ve been chosen!! :33

Okay here’s a list of some of my favorite hcs I have 😽😽😽

- Ralph had a pretty decent home life pre-island, but after the events of the island his parents struggled to deal with his mental health issues and end up being pretty neglectful and irritable with him

- Jack does not have a great home life (his father is an alcoholic and both his mom and dad are quite neglectful)

- Piggy had a good home life, but his aunt didn’t really know how to deal with him being bullied

- Both Simon’s parents worked a lot so he was pretty neglected at home

- Don’t have many specific home life hcs other than those but I don’t believe any of those kids had the greatest home lives pre-island

- Jack is bisexual and at first felt like the island allowed him to feel that way without it feeling sinful

- Jack had a crush on Ralph and vaguely tried to explain it to Ralph but when met with Ralph’s silence became very self conscious of his crush and began to feel that the island didn’t actually free him from feeling sinful (Ralph just got nervous and was struggling to come up with a good response 💔)

- Since nobody had a count of how many kids were on the plane some probably died in the actual crash and another kid or two that no one kept track of died on the island at one point

- Ralph has a younger sister

- Maurice has 4 siblings (an older brother and sister and 2 younger sisters), he’s the middle child

- Feel like most the other kids were only children (other than Samneric obviously), some of the littluns maybe had older siblings

- Jack can’t really ride a bike (I have literally no reason behind this other than I think it’s funny)

- Maurice has a cat that’s mean to everyone but him and that he gave a really dumb name

- Roger has a space interest, he doesn’t really talk about it much though

- Rip Simon you would’ve loved Mitski

- I think it’d be funny if one of the twins were color blind idk which twin and what type of color blindness but it’d be funny

- Jack probably bullied Simon into choir

- Simon is artistic, he likes to doodle in the sand, craft bracelets and stuff with flowers and vines, etc

- Simon feeds stray animals

- Roger is very good at cooking and has a system to how he does it

- Jack on the other hand would make a mess of your kitchen and then set it on fire allegedly by accident

- Simon likes to play with other people’s hair

I also have a couple hcs for how some of the boys’ teeth look written down as reference for when I’m drawing so I’m just gonna drop those too

- Ralph has a pretty straight top row of teeth (just a couple small gaps here and there), but has a really crooked bottom row of teeth

- Jack has really crooked teeth and accidentally knocked out one after some time on the island

- Simon has a gap between his two front teeth and also has really crooked teeth

- Roger has pretty straight teeth but they’re really sharp, chips some of them after some time on the island

- Piggy has crooked teeth mostly in the back of his mouth

Okay that’s all!! Thank you for the ask!! :DD

#lord of the flies #lotf #lotf fandom #lotf headcanons #lotf hcs #marceline talks #Marceline answers

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starseneyes · 1 year

Note

Did you like the confession of feelings from 5.08? From Tim and Lucy?

Hey, Anon! Thanks for the message. This is a tricky one.

I tend not to post my negative thoughts much on here. Partly because I understand that so much of a show comes together because of many parties contributing to an overall whole. Showrunners. Writers. Actors. Producers. Networks. Editors. Directors. Directors of Photography. And the list goes on.

There are things that bug me sometimes about any number of areas, but I tend to keep it to myself. It doesn't seem productive to point something out on an episode that's "in the can" and mentioning it does nothing but come off as whining.

So, I'll answer this honestly because you asked directly—I liked it, but didn't love it, simply because I was confused in the middle, and that pulled me out of the moment.

I have a very hard time being "in the moment" with any television show. Let me explain why:

My mother's a hair and makeup artist in the industry. When I was a kid, I was very badly bullied by classmates, teachers, and even guidance counselors. I was slapped, kicked, tripped, punched, threatened, and had my belongings hidden, manure put in my backpack, and zero support at the school level.

My Mom's answer? She would write me a sick note and take me on set. Most of the directors were super nice, and would invite me to sit behind them at the monitors so I could watch everything.

Sometimes I helped at Craft Service. Sometimes I simply sat and watched scenes. Sometimes I was an extra. I even acted a bit way back in the day. Many of the folks would talk to me, tell me about what they did and why.

At night, my mother left her scripts out for me to collate. Sometimes, we'd get dailies or advanced copies of the episodes and I'd get to sit down and see how they compared to the script. Then compare that to the as-aired editions. I was always fascinated by the changes that came down.

I wrote my first script at 13, an episode of Star Trek: Voyager. I was complimented for the dialogue being spot-on, and to this day the biggest compliments I get are on dialogue and character. For whatever reason, that's always come easy.

I grew up in a very strange way as a set kid who also fell in love with how it all worked. I was a Film Minor in college and had a lot of fun getting blood advice from my mother (drop of blue), and I loved editing.

On top of that, one of my first jobs as a kid was doing voice replacement for Anime. And I spent about 20 years as a contract player with Studio Center doing commercials, books on tape, on-hold messages, and whatnot.

All that to say—lots of stuff stands out to me that most people don't care about a lick. I get excited by camera movements and continuity. I marvel at what we can do with drones vs having to hire a helicopter. I think about the lighting and how to motivate directionality depending on the scene.

Lucy and Tim's conversation (wow, I finally found my way back to the plot) is very them.

I've seen the shows where people have big, over-reaching confessions of their love for one another. And it fit. those. characters.

Tim and Lucy have a history of running from their feelings. For Lucy, she thought that Tim rejected her when he encouraged her to go to UC School. For Tim, he thinks that he's her greatest mistake—an almost that never should have been.

So this whole episode, Tim has been trying to encourage Lucy as a friend. He's not looking for anything. He truly is doing what he can for her, because he doesn't think she wants more. He thinks "she wants me to be her friend" and he's going to do it to his utmost.

Lucy's not even thinking about breaking up with Chris until Tim says she deserves someone who's worth the effort. That gets her brain going. Then Tim points out that Chris loves her, and she admits she doesn't love him.

"He's just not—"

You. You. We all know it's YOU. And as she's now reeling, because even if she didn't say it aloud, she thought it. "He's just not you."

And what do you do with that type of realization? That you're comparing this other guy you're actively dating to the guy beside you. So, Lucy Chen finishes out her shift, gets changed, and sets out to talk to Tim about the whole thing.

She goes into that conversation with the motivation that she wants to talk about them. But Tim's still in friend-mode, so he doesn't see the signals.

That's why it burst out of her. And I don't mind that. I don't mind it at all.

But Tim not acknowledging the change of conversational direction has always bothered me. Especially when it looks like they cut a line from him that very well may have been, "If we do this."

We skipped straight to, "No, you're right." And the first time through, I was super confused, I'll admit. The lack of acknowledgement from Tim just threw me.

There are probably a lot of people out there who weren't bothered at all. But watching Tim's body language indicate a line that was cut really confused me, and then his lack of acknowledgement of the change of direction puzzled me.

Again, you asked my thoughts directly, so I'm giving them openly. But I can hear a bunch of people rolling their eyes at me. Yes, I know I'm odd and what bothers me in a scene is odd.

Because, I don't have beef that Lucy blurted out what was really going on between them because she got impassioned by Tim's assertions about her fear and answered unthinkingly.

I think that's completely in character, especially considering her entire motivation in this scene was to feel that out with Tim. And Tim's surprise and trying to process is in-character, too, but I really missed that conversational transition the first time through. And it still stands out to me on every re-watch.

I know some people wanted a big, emotional love confession... but that's not Tim and Lucy. Neither of them is big about making speeches.

Tim talks often in two or three word sentences (see "Unless it is"). Lucy speaks rapidly, sometimes, but not in an overly elloquent fashion littered with metaphors and emotional revelations. They both tend to be fairly to-the-point in how they communicate.

If we were to get something flowery and flowy from Lucy, I'd expect it in her wedding vows, when she's had time to sit and compose something. She'll attack it like she does her UC work—thoroughly.

And Tim will find ways to show Lucy how he feels. He's more of a show guy, remember? Words aren't his forté, and if they suddenly were, it would be out of character.

Lucy speaks Tim. So, she'll know by his actions how much he loves and cherishes her.

And much as Lucy uses her words, I'd expect more pet-names and short bursts of affection (like telling him he'd do great on his first day) combined with the pranking and awkward photos that have been prevalent throughout their relationship, no matter the phase.

So, did I like the confession? Yes. It was very in-character. Did I love it? No. I had a bit of a hangup, but that's just me. I bet nobody else even noticed, or if they did, they didn't care.

I'm not here to criticize the Writers. I know the care that goes into crafting these characters and their relationships. The hours spent working together to break story, drafts, network notes, and so on. There are so many layers before we even get on-set to start shooting the darn thing.

I think a grand confession from either of them would have felt forced, heavy-handed, wildly out-of-character, and out of the character of the show as a whole. It wouldn't make sense to compromise the integrity of The Rookie for the sake of Chenford.

I do hope that answers your question (and makes a modicum of sense). It's entirely just my opinion! Everyone's mileage may vary, and that's part of what makes fandom fun. Thanks for the message!!

#Chenford #Lucy Chen #Tim Bradford #Melissa O'Neil #Eric Winter #The Rookie

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moorheadthanyoucanhandle · 1 year

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A PORTRAIT OF THE ARTIST AS A YOUNG BOYCHIK

In theaters for Thanksgiving (a safe and Happy Thanksgiving, by the way!):

The Fabelmans--It begins with little Sammy Fabelman being taken to his first movie, in New Jersey in 1952. A cautious, slightly fretful 7-year-old, Sammy (Mateo Zoryon Francis-DeFord) is not sure if he's up for the experience; he's heard the people onscreen are gigantic, and the idea worries him. So his adoring parents attempt to reassure him, from opposite sides: his practical-minded, scientific dad Burt (Paul Dano) explains how film works technically, while his whimsical pixie of a mom Mitzi (Michelle Williams) says that movies are beautiful dreams.

The dream in question turns out to be DeMille's The Greatest Show on Earth, and the big train wreck scene hits Sammy's psyche like...well, like a speeding train. He tries to re-create it with the Lionel train set he gets for Hannukah, and later he films his re-creations with a home movie camera.

As you probably know, this is Steven Spielberg's autobiographical coming-of-age movie, scripted by Tony Kushner from a synopsis they worked up together, and made by the usual gang: filmed by Janusz Kaminski with a score by John Williams. The episodes that follow depict the family's life as Burt, a computer genius, chases work in the budding industry from New Jersey to Arizona, where Sammy makes war epics, to northern California, where he encounters anti-Semitic bullies.

Mitzi, who gave up a career as a concert pianist to be a wife and mom, shows signs of restlessness and depression, except when she's interacting with Burt's best friend Bennie (Seth Rogen), or when she impulsively buys a monkey, who she names Bennie. All of these strands are filtered through the growth of the relationship between Sam (Gabriel LaBelle as an older kid) and the art and craft of moviemaking.

Even though he's one of the most commercially successful popular artists in the world, I think that Spielberg has, in a sense, been critically underappreciated for decades. After the initial, unprecedented splash he made with Jaws, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, E.T. and Raiders of the Lost Ark, he went through a slump in the late '80s and early '90s and cranked out some real bummers; cloying, heavy-handed, trying-too-hard stuff like Hook and Always that made him seem like a phony.

I'm not sure that many critics noticed the way he rediscovered and deepened and sharpened his style with the films he's made in recent years, even when their scripts have sometimes been uneven. Works that range with seemingly equal ease from crisp yet almost invisible technique like The Post to Hitchcockian panache like Bridge of Spies to flashy showmanship like West Side Story suggest an artist who has matured, and who might have something interesting to say about his own life.

And so he does, by turning his gaze outward. Sammy is likable enough, but he's not a rich or idiosyncratic protagonist. What's important is his point of view on Burt and Mitzi. Spielberg here dramatizes the anger and terror, the sense of betrayal, that can result when you begin to see your parents--as Sammy does through his footage of them, while editing home movies--not as stock figures in your story but as complex characters in their own.

And Dano and Williams create vivid, warm portraits of imperfect but unconditionally loving people. So does Rogen, and so does Judd Hirsch in a showcase role as a crazy visionary uncle who tells Sammy hard prophetic truths. So do Jeannie Berlin and Robin Bartlett as the Grandmas, and so do the excellent kids who play the younger sisters. So for that matter, does the monkey.

Not everything in The Fabelmans comes off. There's maybe a scene or two more than is needed of Williams sadly playing sad piano, and the stuff with the bullies, who look like they stepped out of Nazi poster art, feels psychologically confused and uneasy. A scene in which Sammy has a fraught confrontation with a bully he's tried to flatter through moviemaking is potentially interesting for what it hints at about the director's willingness to use his art calculatingly, but it thrashes around and fails, somehow, to come into dramatic focus.

On the other hand, the scenes involving Sammy's early romantic encounters are livened up by the hilarious Chloe East as Monica, his both religiously ecstatic and sexually avid girlfriend, who sees Jesus as one more teen heartthrob. While chaste in the typical Spielbergian manner, they offer a peek at the character's, and the director's, bemused reaction to Christianity.

The movie closes with a depiction of Spielberg's familiar anecdote about his first brush with Hollywood greatness. It allows him to end the film with a self-deprecating "meta" joke that also slyly reminds us that what we've just seen, however honestly intended, is nonetheless a carefully curated official story.

#the fabelmans #steven spielberg #michelle williams #paul dano #gabriel labelle #seth rogen #jeannie berlin #judd hirsch #tony kushner

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unabashedgardenhologram · 1 year

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twenytwenytwo · 2 years

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Oct 7 2022

Had another shift at Brud House today, 7-11. Slept, but not suberbly. Woke up every couple hours. Sometimes in a state of varying unrest. Otherwise anxiety was low today. My grogginess and feeling like I’m in an unusual routine are kinda keeping me from relaxing. It’s like I have to so intentionally do this or that, rather than as a result of habit.

Anyway, yeah, everything still feels very uncertain in my life. So much new stuff is happening, and working up to happening, I can’t seem to find my comfort zone.

Ethan and I are still chatting casually, which is nice but I obviously feel unconsciously uneasy because I don’t want the same general thing to happen. We play, it’s fun, he’s aloof, i’m stuck. I need to explore my anxiety in that neighbourhood more, like why does not playing make me anxious. Is it as simple as unfulfilled goal sorta vibes? The feeling of social significance, superiority almost makes me feel oriented, like I have a place among the cool people, the people I identify with. I feel like a cool guy in the sense that I like being fashionable, artistically skilled, adventurous. To think that my preferred social circle (is it tho?) wouldn’t see me as a top player, and as mediocre, uninteresting, is undesirable to say the least. Especially not being seen as a “top player” is unpleasant, because that’s how I see my self (inflated sense of self importance?)(only child syndrome?).

I like people liking me, feeling un judged, relaxed and safe around me. Wanting to hang out, and that I’m fun to hang out with. I feel like when I look my coolest and be my coolest, I have the biggest worm on my hook. Come hang out with me! Be friends with me! Perhaps it’s a compensation for being so recluse, withdrawn from social activities like sports, etc, things that somewhat forcibly give you friends. When I was in sports, etc, I just kinda wanted to go home though, so I dunno. I think I showed some talent in a lot of different things, and I liked that recognition, but when I wasn’t the best it’s like I was disappointing people, my mom or something, (tho i understand she wasn’t). Being really good at something was a social safety for me, showing I was valuable, worth knowing, otherwise I didn’t know how to make friends a bit, perhaps.

I feel similarly at this point in my life. I really connect with people who are really interested in music, really analyze it, little details, and think it’s really really cool. Rock music mostly, obviously. If a person doesn’t have that, it’s not that I don’t know what to say, it’s that the connection takes longer. Perhaps another mark of the only child, not superbly talented interpersonally. I tend to not ask people questions about themselves, I feel like I’m prying and they’re thinking “why does he want to know that?”, (I know they aren’t). So I just wait for them to engage me, then I’m perfectly fine and interested, particularly when’s it one on one, somewhere relaxed and where I am focused.

Perhaps, a skill to practice that would help me grow my friendships is asking them questions about their life. Like learning to do it well, and getting comfortable doing it mostly, and have it habitually become a conversational point, instead of a genuine passing curiosity that never leaves my head. It’s like I only want to ask these questions when we’ve established a friendship, so as to ask them as an interested friend and not a stranger making small talk or fishing for info. Interesting habit/paranoia.

I think when I’m relaxed and in my ideal social circumstance, I’m a very good socializer and people do see me as nice and fun to talk to. I just keep myself busy and stay home etc, therefore I rarely get to see this side of me grow and have clear acceptance, so I get somewhat stuck in the avoidant side of things mentioned.

Being better at connecting with people would likely make me feel more relaxed with being “not the greatest ever” because I’d be able to see how interested people are in being friends and hanging out, regardless of who I am or whatever blah blah.

You could say that this point in your life, when you encounter you weaknesses and are bothered by them specifically, is a pivotal moment. Your whole life so far has been largely guided by various sorts of momentum. Your strengths grow, your weaknesses never get work because you’re busy having fun. Then, hopefully, you get an early look at how your weaknesses have been slowly and quietly affecting your life. Now, you either even them out, or have your potential weighed down.

But only by being forced to look at them, with brutal sudden starkness, would you ever put down your youthful wonderland to look at the rest of life and your weaknesses. Perhaps I’ve been hiding in my strengths, numbed by pride to the real subtractive force that are weaknesses. I wish I had more friends, more independence, a more connected relationship. These are my unsupervised weaknesses at play.

My blessing, my gift, is feeling the effect of them early on in life, and having a chance to analyze, understand, and improve upon, and have them stop toying with my life’s gears behind my back.

These weaknesses are inevitable formations. I think I may have said this already, but in our early years, we’ll find something we’re good at, ways of operating that work, and we’ll stick to them, and gain years of momentum practicing them. Inevitably, this leaning towards our strengths, or things we find easiest, or most gratifying, makes us lean away from something else. These things, vague here, may be important to the life we want to live, to things that may become more relevant to us in time. An example is me: when you’re younger and somewhat forced into social situations, you don’t need to practice making connections. I played to my strengths, befriending musicians because that was an easy initial connection to make. Now, I’m not forced into contact with nearly as many people, especially in a way that has you involuntarily spending years together, school, sports, etc, and it’s difficult for me to make as many new friends as I did then. Without being aware of my relevant weaknesses, I start to wonder why, and if I continue to be prideful and hide in my strengths, I blame the world, instead of habits I’ve formed over my life, thus unable to ever solve my problem.

And that’s kinda what I’ve done. Instead of examining myself and my problems, I try to fix things back to the way they were before they changed. Keep things comfy, instead of finding the new circumstance, opportunity waiting for me, to fill that vacuum created by inevitable change. Faces change, things change, but the part they play, the feelings they inspire remain the same. I found myself in good situations by basically pleasure seeking, I gave most of my energy to what was most pleasurable. I became protective of those situations as the responsibilities of life slowly approached me, encroaching on my party.

Slowly, life got serious. Things started to fall into disfunction, as they do, and these things are also my only stable source of safety, fun, general comfort. Suddenly I’m thrown into a world I’ve plainly been avoiding, without warning and no self made system to attack it. I don’t understand it. My comforts have been taken away. I am overwhelmed and confused. I’m questioning how I can be myself in this world, and thus what this world is? How do I feel good again? Thus asking what is good!

What miserable confusion this young shrimp had to experience. But luckily it happened. It happened when he could use the wisdom gained to carve out an excellent, while the medium was soft and still in it’s maliable youth. Imagine the misery if he had gotten his way for a while longer: at year 30 — worse: 35 — he would have found himself without a good job option, without understanding of himself, without a network of musical comrades, only having known Nanaimo… What. A. Mess.

But the shrimp was lucky enough to experience at year 24.5. What a generous head start, not even mentioning the significant headway he had already made as an artist. Wow. Thank the gods of fate.

That’s enough for now.

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portraitandplaylist · 2 years

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Side A: Giovanni

What does music mean to you? How does it make you feel?

So music to me is like the embodiment of human emotions and thoughts and yeah, at the same time it is still something really universal and ethereal because, I don't know, it's the middle of the emotions and the tangible things that we have as humans. And I don't know, it just makes me feel good, man. Like good and sexy, nostalgic, sad, then still sexy then sexy and sexy and sexy and sexy. That's it.

How big of a part does music play in your life and career?

To me, music is definitely one of the biggest part of my life because well, career wise, I would love to work in the music industry. I'm an aspiring artist and yeah, it would be amazing, but I think that whatever plan God has in store for me, definitely music will be a big part of it and it will influence my life a lot. So yeah, it just means a lot. And I wouldn't know how to explain it with words.

What's a song you know word for word, bar for bar?

The song I know word for word, bar by bar - okay my Italian came out - is Mama Saturn by Tanarélle because I don't know, I've listened to that song too much and it's just speaks to me in a different level. It's - wow. Yeah.

Do you collect vinyl? If so what do you enjoy about it? And if not, how come?

I sadly do not collect vinyls because I don't have the player thing - I don't know how to say in English - and they're expensive, but I would love to and I'm really sad that I don't, but I still support my favourite artists by buying tickets for them.

Tell me about your favourite concert that you went to.

I've been to many concerts I enjoyed, no bad concerts, but I think as of lately, Mahmood. My favourite Italian artist came to London [on] May 2nd. It was my birthday so it was really special to me. I had a birthday hat on and so he said happy birthday to me and yeah, that's why I think it was probably the most special, and everyone was Italian in the venue, you know? So it felt like I had a piece of home in that venue that night, so yeah.

Your favourite lyric?

You'd kneel down to the dry land / Kiss the earth that birthed you [Frank Ocean, Pink + White]

Give me the name of a playlist you made with no context.

R&B TO PLAY IN A BENZ

What are your desert island disc albums?

So I have Blond by Frank Ocean for my 'being sad' moments. Ghettolimpo - to remind myself where I'm from - by Mahmood and 4U by Ojerime, 'cause it's a sexy album.

Tell me about music your parents played while you were growing up.

So my mom and my dad were really different in taste. In fact, my dad brought me to the old school Italian music, so like Domenico Modugno, Fabrizio De André; while my mum was really like thee singers, you know, Whitney Houston, Tina Turner. She used to play all of that. And yeah so I grew up with that type of music. And then when I started listening to my own music, a lot of R&B and stuff, they started to listen to that music as well, so yeah.

Briefly talk me through the songs you put in this playlist, what do they mean to you.

My first song is Ghettolimpo by Mahmood because it's just a work of art that song speaks about like his personal life, how he grew up and his relationship with religion and faith, but also just music in general and chasing his dreams, growing up without his dad.

And then there's Pyramids by Frank Ocean because that song is just simply the greatest song of all time.

SUMMER SALT by Smino because it's my summer song. And Smino was definitely one of the biggest influences in my life.

Out Of My Way by RIMON, cuz that's my party song, it's my favourite party song.

'A capa e 'o core by SVM & LaHasna is a Neapolitan Italian song. And I love how the lyrics are so angry, but the song is just - I don't know - it's like you're on a wave, you know, it's so nice.

And then there's I Know Now (2003) by Ojerime, which is - listen, guys, listen, I don't owe any explanation.

No Angel by Beyonce because it's underrated as fuck and that's one of her best songs and I don't know, I just love the switch, the beat switch and what she does with her voice.

Mama Saturn by Tanarélle, 'cause that's a song I know word for word.

Burn by Jorja Smith, 'cause it speaks to me, I'm sure she wrote it for herself and for every person that you know was going through something, especially as a teenager sometimes.

And the last one is Amore che vieni, amore che vai and it's an Italian old school song, which my dad used to play in the car all the time, so yeah.

#portrait #portrait photography #playlist #music #35mm #lyrics #concert #vinyl #Spotify #photography #film photography #interview #ojerime #frank ocean #rnb #italian music #italian #mahmood

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unraveling-gailee · 2 years

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Unwavering Courage

“What is resilience without the courage to go out of one’s way in the pursuit of offering humanity to others?

The Filipinos have always been known for their resiliency. In the face of the greatest adversities in life, poverty, typhoons, earthquakes, fires, and droughts, they have always stood their ground, plastering smiles on their ill-stricken faces. It seems that in every calamity that strike us, even in the darkest situations, our hearts will harbor the smallest flicker of hope. We always hold onto it despite the disagreement of others that we are only harnessing false beliefs. Perhaps it is true that the Filipino resilience is an overrated statement that undermines the real situation that we have to solve as a country. Maybe for normal people to see that there really is a problem in our streets is to stop glorifying how quick we are to adapt in the hurdles that life throws at us. But what is it really that pushes us to stand on our feet, regardless of the challenges desperately trying to deter our spirits? Family.

It is in and for the sake of our families that we forget the hardships in this life and brave our souls just to give them a better opportunity. Like any other Filipino, I highly value my family.

As per its definition, the family is the basic unit of society. Every individual begins in being a part of it, whether they are affiliated through blood, marriage, or adoption. And for me, my roots will always be connected to my family. Who I am as a person is significantly influenced by the personalities of the people in our household. I have my Father’s calm and serene disposition, my mother’s strength and bravery, my sister’s artistic side. Their individuality serves as a portion of what makes me original and I will always be proud of how my family serves as my greatest motivation in pursuing my own dreams. To be honest, the profession of my parents is completely unrelated to the medical field. Still, having that kind of influence did not stop me from choosing to go along this path because of them. If I can be someone who can take care of them, knowledgeable enough to heal the pains they feel from work-related stress, then I will be fulfilled as their daughter.

And I guess this is how I’ve always been to everyone. Someone who always cares. It’s like a second skin that I can never shrug off because I feel like I have to do something for other people, no matter how small. My friends would always tell me that I am like a mom, looking after them. They told me that I am very warm and easy to get along with as a person.

I do admit to have been emitting warmth into this world because as cliché as it sounds, for me there’s so much harshness out there already that if I don’t care enough or if I ignore the pains of others, how am I different to the perpetrators of their misery? If I just bypass a person who begs in the street, then I am not that far from the life that struck them down.

Therefore, as a future nurse or doctor, it is what I swore my life into doing. I cannot just let my life pass me by, hoping that I or the people surrounding me will always be resilient. What is resilience without the courage to go out of one’s way in the pursuit of offering humanity to others? I do believe that if one does not move out of her comfort zone, she cannot ever feel the pain of those beneath her. If she remains numb from these pains, then how else would she be able to find a cure to heal the illness of our society? I know that it is quite wide in scope but I also know that the illness of our country begins in small-scale problems. In the little things like providing quality and efficient healthcare.

And so, it is what I want to be the core of the warmth I’ll envelope others with. The genuine desire to be of service and to uplift lives by assisting patients to get back on their feet after their lives’ greatest challenge. I want to reunite them with their families and give them the energy to help themselves for the people awaiting for their recovery. Hopefully, I will continuously nurture this wanton within me. For now, I will always find ways to strengthen the unwavering courage that lives within my mind and heart.

#Module 3 #UnwaveringCourage

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leggerefiore · 2 years

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▲Subway Bosses as Dads HC▽

▲Ingo▼

● He's a bit of a strict dad, honestly. There is a flexible schedule he has specifically for them. It's less 'Do your homework right now!' and more 'have it done by dinner'. Ingo is very understanding if they do not, however. All they have to do is communicate with him.

● Which is hard when your father is a busy man like the Subway Boss is. He attempts to be home before they go to bed every night, but sometimes it's just not possible. He video calls in the times he can't because he doesn't want them to feel abandoned. His work is important, but so are they.

● He wants to have multiple children. The thought of being an only child seems painfully lonely; it's not something he could put his own child through. He would genuinely beg his partner to understand his perspective if they disagree. Ingo is a twin, and he can't imagine a world without Emmet. The idea of his child being lonesome is genuinely terrifying to him.

● He does that thing where the kids hold on to a rope in line behind him. They hear 'all aboard!' and their piece of the rope with a Pavlovian response. People around Nimbasa observe the line of children marching behind the Subway Boss curiously.

● Ingo will share his passions with his kids, even if they aren't all too interested. He doesn't force them to be involved with them, either. He'll just turn on a documentary about the history of locomotives and watch to who sticks around. If any of them have his love for trains or battles (or both), he's so ecstatic. Gets them a pokemon and teaches them battle techniques or lets them watch his the trains around the Gear Station function.

● He doesn't ignore his kids' other passions. Ingo wholeheartedly supports them, so long as it's nothing dangerous. He's an angry soccer mom in spirit when it comes to his children. If his kid wants to play a sport, his cheers are louder than anyone else in the bleachers could ever hope to get. If they're an artist, he's always actively enjoying their works. Ingo offers genuine feedback for them, too.

● Best advice dad, definitely a 'do as I say, not as I do'. He tells his kids to got to bed at a regular time every night, and one points out that Ingo literally went to bed at one in the morning and had to wake up at five in the morning. They get the dad look.

● He has a picture of his kids wearing his hat as little children. If he's having a stressful day at work, he glances at it and feels much better. They're something extremely precious to him and ground him.

▽Emmet△

○ Fun dad! He's very easy-going, yet still has some expectations for his kids. He wants to see them succeed and actively supports them in any way he can.

○ Also very busy, but has set more hard boundaries than his older brother. He will get off before they go to bed, unless the Gear Station is actively burning down or someone's stole a train. If he can't, he'll also video call them and apologize a bunch. He wants to be with them, he promises.

○ He wants multiple kids, too, but also specifically would like twins. Being a twin is an experience he would to share, especially with his children. The deep bond that is included is heavily important to him. (Ingo rains on his parade by telling him how rare twins are.) If his partner doesn't want multiple kids (especially two babies at once), he will somehow convince them. Emmet has Ingo come in and support him on either point.

○ 100% carried his children as infants in those baby backpacks. If it's twins, one was strapped to the front and the other to his back. People feared him as he wandered around a grocery store looking for formula.

○ Both him and Ingo definitely did the “here comes the Choo Choo train” when feeding their kids with spoons.

○ He would prefer his kids get more into battling than trains. Ingo and him are deeply infatuated by locomotives and would probably live on one if they could, but his kids have to be trainers. They're his greatest rivals after twin and partner. Emmet will teach them good battling styles and team building. Though, if his children love trains just like him, they will learn every ounce of knowledge he can give to them.

○ He is absolutely enthusiastic about his kids' other interests! If they want to do art, he'll obtain them the best materials they need and offer to help bring attention to them should they want to go professional. If they want to do sports, he WILL make every game and be extremely obnoxious with a noisemaker. It is completely embarrassing for his children.

○ Affectionate dad. His kids will know how loved they are. Emmet gives the hugs regularly and keeps good physical contact with them. His children did not sleep on their own until his partner finally stepped in. The Subway Boss let them sleep in the bed with him every time they wanted to and cuddled them close.

○ Has a picture of his kids hiding in his coat during an unexpected rainstorm when they were younger. He thinks it's the cutest thing he has ever seen, and looks at whenever he feels a bit down or stressed. A family was always something he wanted, and he is completely happy to have it.

#pokemon ingo #pokemon emmet #subway boss ingo #subway boss emmet #not romantic hcs #i can do some romantic ones but my brain is currently mad at me because of dst #nonromantichcs

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thenovelartist · 3 years

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Boys as Dads - Tears of Themis Headcanons

I've been sitting on this for days, writing it after @luke-appreciator mentioned the boys as dads and henceforth planting the idea in my mind.

Luke

LOOK! Luke is living past his three year “time limit” goshdarnit! He gets to see his kids grow up!

And he has several of them with his MC (I’m thinking four or five.)

They were all mostly planned. (They were just rolling with however many they were blessed with until they decided to stop.)

When his first child was born, he cried. He didn’t think he’d get this opportunity, but now he’s a dad and feels overwhelmed by the blessing.

He is as involved in his kids’ lives as he possibly can be.

He’s the dad that will teach his kids how to fix everything.

Totally the hands-on dad of wrestling and headlocks and ruffling their hair.

Yes, even his girls, but in a slightly different context. Uses those moments to teach them self-defense. (Yes, he’ll do that to his boys, but he’s more concerned about his girls.)

That said, he’s very protective of his kids and wants to give them all the knowledge he can to make sure they can keep themselves safe.

Will try to get his kids into Sherlock Holmes.

One of his kids is named John after John Watson. It was actually MC’s idea, much to Luke’s surprise and delight.

When he’s away on mission (which already makes him sad because he doesn’t like being away from his precious family), he hates it when he has to go full dark mode. Because he’d at least like to call them and tell them good night if he can’t be there.

The king of pictures.

There are cameras scattered throughout the house so he can easily steal a picture whenever he wants to.

Will put together scrapbooks upon scrapbooks of photographs for all kinds of events. The kids get in on these activities, and it has become a bit of a family event to arrange the pages together.

Not a day goes by he takes for granted. Does not matter if he’s cleaning up diapers or one of his kids is sick or he’s having to do damage control when something gets out of hand. He cherishes all of it.

Vyn

I see Vyn having one or two. Both were totally planned.

Mostly, he just sees children as patients, but now, he’s got two children he actually raises.

And the moment his first child is placed into his arms, he realizes with sickening clarity that his actions have a direct impact on their lives.

While he knew that beforehand, there was a moment it clicked, and Vyn felt himself change that day.

He strives to be the best father he can, minding everything he does to lead by example.

He didn’t have the greatest childhood, meaning he does everything he can to make sure his kids never have to experience the things he wished never happened to him.

He’s a bit of a helicopter parent despite knowing he needs to not be. All he wants to do is protect his kids, is that so wrong?

However, because of that, he happens to understand and sympathize with parents more now. His kids wrecked him in ways he didn’t think possible.

It’s a bit of a learning experience for him to allow his kids to learn on their own. He knows so much and wants to just tell them everything they need to know, but realizes that he can’t do that. He has to let them learn and grow in their own ways.

He wants to give his kids the best, from quality schooling to extracurricular activities. But he’s also is more than happy to teach them their way around the kitchen and garden as well as play games and do puzzles with them.

Also really enjoys reading them books at bedtime. A habit that will linger around for surprisingly long while.

He’s the dad that is glad to help with homework whenever they need it.

Always offers to listen to them and talk them through things. It would be pretty shameful if the psychiatrist couldn’t help guide his own kids through their own mental hurdles.

And he knows he did something right because his kids are comfortable talking with him about a lot of things, even in their teenage and young adult years.

Ends up the dad who has the best life advice that his kids eventually learn to always listen to even if they don’t appreciate it when they’re younger.

Artem

Ends up with a large family, both adopting and raising his own.

Probably two of their own, and two or three (or four… maybe five) adopted.

The kids they had were planned; the ones they adopted… not always. It tended to be a “this one grew on you unexpectedly” situation.

Loves all his kids equally, whether they’re his own or adopted.

Super supportive dad. Probably spoils his kids in praise and hugs.

That being said, he won’t coddle them. He’s all for supporting them, but knows when to allow his kids face the negative consequences of their actions. He’s an attorney, after all. This is his “justice” side showing.

But he’s fair. He will guide them the best he can but will let experience be the teacher if he needs to. And if experience is the cruel teacher of the day, he’ll be there, whether to pick them up, dust them off, and offer hugs or to talk them through how to best navigate the consequences and avoid the situation next time.

His schedule revolves around any and all events in his kids’ lives. Which, considering the size of his family, is a balancing act.

Days off are sacred. That is his time to spend with his family.

Nightly family dinners are a big thing in the Wing household. Game nights on weekends are even bigger. And louder.

He’s the dad that can go from tutus and tea parties to action figures and lego sets. Whatever his kids are up for, he’ll gladly participate.

Every year, for each kid’s birthday, will spend one-on-one time with them and do whatever they want to do for an entire day. With a big family, especially with the adopted ones, he knows it might be easy to feel lost in the crowd and doesn’t want any of his kids thinking that.

Once a year, they go on a week-long vacation somewhere in nature. No phones, no technology; this is family bonding time and time for kids to just run around and be kids.

All in all, grade A dad.

Marius

Ends up with two or three.

The first one was a surprise, and likely one more after that was not planned, either.

But the moment he holds his first child, a switch goes off in his mind and Marius matures, knowing he’s got not only his girl to protect and keep safe but now a helpless little one who’s wholly dependent upon him.

He’s probably the second most hover-y of the boys behind Vyn. And that’s less because he’s a helicopter parent and more because he knows he’s a target for people and is very concerned for his kids’ safety. So he’s hypervigilant of everything, including what school they go to, who they’re friends with, where they go, etc.

Their house… oh my…

He’s an artist, and he will inspire that in his kids. There’s paint, stickers, crayons, and markers freaking everywhere.

Oh, and art taped to practically every wall. And a few in his office.

Marks every major event down on a calendar. His assistant knows there will be hell to pay if there’s a scheduling mishap.

Never let him help with homework (unless it’s art). Because he’s the guy who will teach his kids the smartass answers to some questions, even if it gets his kids in trouble.

(Spoiler: his kids never mind and instead pick up his bad habits.)

(Much to MC’s chagrin. Will make Marius go sit in the corner, much to his children’s delight.)

Will put his kids into any extracurricular activities they want growing up.

Totally spoils them in that way.

But the minute they turn into little shits about their wealth? Say good bye to your technology for the next few days. Marius is all about spoiling his kids, but not rotten. Even he hates snotty rich people he has to deal with, and he’s not gonna let his kids be like that.

Loves spending time doing things with his kids. Up for anything from the midday ice creams when mom told them no to spontaneous adventures. Oh yeah, he’s that dad.

#tears of themis #tears of themis headcanons #luke pierce #vyn richter #artem wing #marius von hagen

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thedeadhandofseldon · 3 years

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The Anti-Mercer Effect

On the Accessibility of D&D, Why Unprepared Casters is so Fun, and Why Haley Whipjack is possibly the greatest DM of our generation.

(Apologies to my mutuals who aren’t in this fandom for the length of this, but as you all know I have never in my life shut up about anything so… we’ll call it even for the number of posts about Destiel I see every day.

To fellow UC fans - I haven’t listened to arc 4 yet, I started drafting this in early August, and I promise I will write a nice post about how great Gus the Bard is once I get the chance to listen to more of his DMing).

Structure - Or, “This is not the finale, there will be more podding cast”

So, first of all, let’s just talk about how Unprepared Casters works. Because it’s kind of unusual! Most of the other big-name D&D podcasts favor this long, grand arcs; UC has about 10 hours of podcast per each arc. And that’s a major strength in a lot of ways: it makes it really accessible to new listeners, because you can just start with the current arc and understand what’s going on!

And by starting new arcs every six or seven episodes, they can explore lots of ways to play D&D! Classic dungeon delve arc! Heist arc! Epic heroes save the world arc! Sportsball arc! They can touch on all sorts of things!

And while I’m talking about that: Dragons in Dungeons, the first arc, makes it incredibly accessible as a show - because it lets the unfamiliar listener get a sense of what D&D actually is. (It’s about telling stories and making your friends feel heroic and laugh and cry, for the record). If I had to pick a way to introduce someone to the game without actually playing it with them, that arc would definitely be it.

And I’d be remise not to note one very important thing: Haley Whipjack and Gus the Bard are just very funny, very charismatic people. Look. Episode 0s tend to be about 50%(?) those two just talking to each other about their own podcast. It shouldn’t work. And yet it DOES, its one of my favorite parts, because Haley and Gus are just cool.

And a side note that doesn’t fit anywhere else: I throw my soul at him! I throw a scone at him - that’s it, that’s the vibe. The whole podcast alternates between laughing with your friends and brooding alone in a dark tavern corner - but the laughs never forced and the dark corner is never too dark for too long.

Whipjack the Great - Or, the DM is Also a Player!

I think Haley Whipjack is one of the greatest Dungeon Masters alive. The plots and characters! The mechanical shenanigans! The descriptions!

Actually, let’s start there: with the descriptions. (Both Haley and Gus do this really fucking well). As we know, Episode 0 of each arc sees the DM reading a description - of a small town, or the Up North, or the recent history of a great party. And Haley always strikes this tricky balance - one I think a lot of us who DM struggle with - between giving too much description and worldbuilding, and not telling us anything at all. She describes people and events in just enough detail to imagine them, but never so much they seem static and unreal - just clear enough to envision, but with enough vagueness left to let your imagination begin to run wild.

While I’m thinking about arc 3’s party, let’s talk about a really bold move she made in that arc: letting the players have ongoing control of their history. Loser Lars! She didn’t try to spell out every detail of this high-level party’s history, or restrict their past to only what she decided to allow - she gave them the broad outlines, and let them embellish it. And that made for a much more alive story than any attempt to create it by herself would have - but I think it takes a lot of courage to let your players have that agency. Most Dungeon Masters (myself included) tend to struggle with being control freaks.

And the plots! Yeah, arc one is built of classic tropes - but she actually uses them, she doesn’t get caught up in subverting everything or laughing at the cliches. And it’s fun! In arc 3, there really isn’t a straight line for the players to follow, either - which makes the game much more interesting and much trickier to run. And her NPCs are fantastic and I will talk about them in the next section.

Above all, though, I think what is really impressive is how Haley balances mechanics, and rules as written, with the narrative and rule of cool - and puts both rules and story in the service of playing a fun game. And the secret to that? She’s the DM, but the DM is a player, and the DM is clearly having fun. Hope Lovejoy mechanically shouldn’t get that spellslot back, but she does, and it’s fun. The changeling merchant in Thymore doesn’t really make some Grand Artistic Narrative better, but wow is it fun. And she never tries to force it one way or the other - the story might be more dramatic if Annie didn’t manage to banish the demon from the vault, but it’s a lot cooler and a lot more fun for the players if Annie gets to be a badass instead - and the rules and the dice say that Annie managed it.

Settings feel like places, NPCs feel like people, and the narrative plot feels like a real villainous plot.

Anyway. I could go on about the various ways in which Whipjack is awesome for quite a while - she’s right, first place in D&D is when your friends laugh and super first place is when they cry - but I’m going to stop here and just. Make another post about it some other time. For now, for the record I hold her opinions about the game in higher esteem than I do several official sourcebooks; that is all.

Characters - Or, Bombyx Mori Is Not an Asshole, And That Matters

Okay, I said I would talk about characters! And I will!

Just a general place to start: the party! All of the first three parties are interesting to me, because they all care about each other. Not even necessarily in a Found Family Trope sort of way, though often that too. But they generally aren’t assholes to each other. The players create characters that actually work together, that are interesting; even when there’s internal divisions like SK-73 v. Sir Mr. Person, they aren’t just unpleasant and antagonistic all the time. Listening to the podcast, we’re “with” these people for a couple hours - and it isn’t unpleasant. That matters a lot. (To take a counter-example: I love Critical Role, but the episode when Vox Machina pranked Scanlan after he died and was resurrected wasn’t fun to listen to, it was just uncomfortable and angering and vaguely cruel).

All of the PCs are amazing, and the players in each arc did a great job. If you disagree with me about that, well, you have the right to be incorrect and I am sorry for your loss. Annie Wintersummer, for one example: tragic and sad and I want to give her a hug, but also Fuck Yeah Wintersummer, and also her familiar Charles the Owl is the cutest and funniest and I love him. And we understand what’s going on with Annie, she isn’t some infinite pool of hidden depths because this arc is 7 episodes and we don’t have time for that, but she also has enough complexity to be interesting. Same with Fey Moss: yeah, a lot of her is a silly pun about fame that carries into how she behaves, but a lot of how she behaves is also down to some good classic half-elven angst about parenthood and wanting to be known and seen and important. (Side note: if your half-elf character doesn’t have angst, well, that’s impressive and also I don’t think I believe you).

There are multiple lesbian cat-people in a 4-person party and they both have requited romantic interests who aren’t each other. This is the future liberals want and I am glad for it.

Sir Mister Person, the human fighter! Thavius, the edge lord! Even when a character is “simple,” they’re interesting, because of how they’re played as people and not action-figures. And that matters a lot.

In the same way: the NPCs. There really aren’t a lot of them! And some of them come from Patreon submissions, so uh good work gang, you’re part of the awesomeness and I’m proud of you! The point being, the NPCs work because enough of them are interesting to matter. It’s not just a servant who opens Count Michael’s door, it’s a character with a name (Oleandra!) and a personality and history. They’re interesting. Penny Lovejoy didn’t need to be interesting, the merchant outside the Laughing Mausoleum didn’t need to be interesting, but they ARE! And Haley and Gus EXCEL at making the NPCs matter, not just to the story but to us as viewers. I agree with Sir Mister Person, actually, I would die for the princesses of the kingdom. I actually care about Gem Lovejoy of all people - that wouldn’t happen in an ordinary campaign! That’s the thing that makes Unprepared Casters spectacular - and, frankly, it’s especially impressive because D&D does not tend to be good at making a lot of interesting compared to a lot of other sorts of stories.

And, just as an exemplar of all this: Bombyx Mori. Immortal, reincarnating(?), and described as the incarnation of the player’s ADHD. I expected to hate Bombyx, because as the mom friend both in and out of my friend-group’s campaigns, the chaos-causer is always exhausting to me. And yeah, Bombyx causes problems on purpose! But! She is not an asshole.

And that’s important. Bombyx goes and sits with the queen and comforts her. Bombyx gives Annie emotional support. Bombyx isn’t just a vehicle to jerk around the DM and other players; Bombyx really is a character we can care about. To compare with another case - in the first couple episodes of The Adventure Zone, the PCs are just dicks. Funny, but dicks. Bombyx holds out an arm “covered in larva” to shake with a count, and robs him of magical items, but she also cares about her friends and other people! She uses a powerful magical gem to save her fertilizer guy from death! Yeah, Bombyx is ridiculous, but she’s not just an asshole the party has to keep around for plot reasons; you can see why her party would keep her around. And one layer of meta up, she’s the perfect example of how to make a chaotic character like that while still being fun for everyone you’re playing with, which is often not the case. And I love her.

The Anti-Mercer Effect - Or, “I think we proved it can be fun, you can have a good time with your friends. And it doesn’t have to be scary, you can just work with what you know”

The Mercer Effect basically constitutes this: Matthew Mercer, Dungeon Master of Critical Role, is incredible (as are all of his players). They’re all professional story-tellers in a way, remember, and so Critical Role treats D&D like a narrative art-form, and it’s inspiring. Seeing that on Critical Role sets impossible standards - and people go into their own home games imagining that their campaigns will be like Critical Role, and the burden of that expectation tends to fall disproportionately on the DM. And the end result, I think, of the Mercer Effect is that we get discouraged or intimidated, because our game isn’t “as good as” theirs. (And I should note - Matt certainly doesn’t want that to be our reaction).

So the Anti-Mercer Effect is two things: it’s D&D treated like a game, and it’s inspiring but not intimidating. And Unprepared Casters manages both of those really freaking well. Because they play it like a game! A UC arc looks just like a good campaign in anyone’s home game. They have the vibes of 20-somethings and college students playing D&D for fun because that’s who they are (as a 20-something college student who plays a lot of D&D, watching it felt like watching my friends play an especially good campaign). They’re trying to tell a good story, sure, and they always do. But first and foremost, they’re trying to have fun, and it shows, and I love the UC cast for it.

And that’s the other half of it: it’s inspiring! It’s approachable; you can see that Haley and Gus put plenty of work into preparing the game but it also doesn’t make you feel like you need hundreds of pages of worldbuilding to run a game. Sometimes a cleric makes Haley cry and she gives them back a spell-slot from their deity! That’s fantastic! It’s just inspiring - listening to this over the summer, when my last campaign had fallen apart under the strain of graduation, is why I decided to plan and run my new one!

That quote from Haley Whipjack that I used as the title for this section? That’s the whole core of this idea, and really, I think, the core of the podcast.

The Mercer Effect is when you go “that’s really cool, I could never do that.” But Unprepared Casters makes you look at D&D and go “wow, that looks really fun. I bet I can do that!” And I love the show for it.

And I bet a lot of you do too.

#unprepared casters #bombyx mori #haley whipjack #long post #this is really rough but I don't have time to keep working on it and it's already a month later than intended

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angellesword · 3 years

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YOUR EYES TELL | JJK | 15 (FINAL)

Summary: You live in a world where people see in black and white. The solution to finally see the colors? It’s simple. You need to meet your soulmate and look at him in the eyes, but what if the person bound to you is already contented with the monochromatic world? What if…Jeongguk, your soulmate, is already in love with someone else?

Alternatively:

“A future without you is a world without color.”

Genre: soulmate au, e2l, slow burn, angst, fluff, roommate au

Pairing: Artist!Jungkook x Lawyer!Reader

Word Count: 4k

SERIES: CHAPTER 14 | SPECIAL CHAPTER

"You sure you don't need anything?"

You weren't sure if it was annoyance or amusement that caused you to chuckle upon hearing hesitation in your father's voice.

"I'm good, Appa." You assured him, "it's just Jeongguk. Don't worry."

You were wrong. He wasn't worried because of Jeongguk. He was worried because of you.

"Okay," your father let out a deep sigh as he tried to calm his mind. "I trust your soulmate. Have fun, love."

And just like that, the call ended.

Soulmate.

After everything that had happened, your father still believed that Jeongguk was your soulmate.

You still did too. How could you deny that fact when you could clearly see colors now?

It had been four months since your eye surgery. You didn't think it was going to be a successful, mainly because you were convinced that Jeongguk's hatred towards you was the reason why you went blind.

Apparently, it was your fault.

You knew it was reckless to drive when you were under the influence of alcohol. This wasn't just about you. This was also about the people who could have suffered because of your stupidity.

Your father was actually disappointed in you. He didn't expect you to do something like this, especially because he knew that you had a careful approach in life.

You hated being a burden. Your greatest fear was to be the reason why someone was hurting. Your father didn't understand what ticked you to break out of character, and so he asked. He asked what was wrong—causing you to break into tears.

You couldn't keep this to yourself anymore.

You told him about everything you had been going through—like how your soulmate didn't love you and how stressful being a lawyer was.

Of course your father understood, but he told you that it wasn't an excuse to put yourself and other people in danger.

There were other ways to welcome or ignore pain. You agreed since it wasn't like you planned this to happen.

Your father didn't believe in you, though. He felt like you were trying to harm yourself. This was why he called you every single day. He wanted to make sure that you weren't driving or doing things you weren't supposed to do.

He freaked out when you told him that you were going out with Jeongguk tonight. It wasn't because he hated your soulmate. Admittedly, he felt like you were lying when you told him that Jeongguk didn't love you.

That can't be right. It was obvious. Your father had met your soulmate and he saw the way Jeongguk looked and talked about you. He couldn't be wrong; the boy destined to be with you was whipped—as in madly in love with you.

His claim turned out to be true when right after your surgery; you gasped and cried so hard because finally, you could see colors.

It was too good to be true. Was this seriously happening? Was Jeongguk really in love with you?

You couldn't tell.

You used to think that seeing colors was the indication of your soulmate's love for you, but it had been months now yet Jeongguk hadn't verbally told you that he loved you.

Sure. Actions spoke louder than words. You guessed you just had to be contented with this.

The past four months felt like a dream. Jeon Jeongguk, the most stubborn and egotistical person in the world, was acting like a lovesick fool because of you.

You told yourself that you did not want to love your soulmate. You stood by this. You had been ignoring Jeongguk's attempt to 'win you over.'

(Un)fortunately, the boy just wouldn't stop.

He would send you letters written in a small sticky note every day just to tell you the sappiest thing. On the other side of the sticky note, there's an exquisite drawing of every detail about you.

You realized that it was some sort of puzzle, but you hadn't really had the chance to piece it together because you were too caught up with the words written in the sticky notes.

Note 1 Red Red is the first color in the rainbow. She is my first love, but it ended. I'm saying this because I realized that the start isn't always the end. She’s the beginning, you are my end game.

This was the first note you had received from your soulmate. It was plastered on your front door—this was also the first thing you had seen after you had been discharged from the hospital.

Note 2 Orange Orange is the color I thought I know by heart. As it turns out, I've been fooled. I have been fooled by the world, but it's okay. You helped me see.

This note was unclear to you, yet it didn't fail to make your heart feel light. You weren't aware that Jeongguk was talking about how the florist who sold him orange tulips for almost a decade, the one who fooled him.

No one could take advantage of him now, though. You helped him with this problem.

Note 3 Yellow My mom said that yellow is the prettiest color. She also said that it shines the brightest. I'm glad I didn't believe her. It wasn't bright at all. It only reminds me of the time I thought I'll lose you.

It took you long to realize what he was implying.

Yellow.

This was the color of your shirt when your car crashed. Jeongguk remembered how dark life was when you were pushing him away.

Your soulmate had sent you hundreds of letters by now. All of his notes started with colors. Out of all the things he sent you, the yellow note was what stuck to you the most.

The black world was frightening. It felt cold and lonely and Jeongguk was exactly like that. He was lonely. He suffered from a major heartbreak that was why he turned cold. He hated what Red had done to him, but he wasn't really different from his ex-girlfriend.

Jeongguk hurt you the same way Red hurt him, but your soulmate was willing to do everything to make it up to you.

Aside from the notes, you also found out that Jeongguk was the one who cooked your food each day. You got mad at Red because she failed to tell you the truth. There was even a point wherein you stopped eating the food your soulmate had prepared since you literally didn't want to do anything with him anymore.

Jeongguk was still persistent. He would always pick you up from work and then he would ask if you wanted to grab dinner with him.

You always declined his offer to take you out. Turning him down was always part of your daily routine, so you didn't know what changed this Saturday night.

Why, after four months, did you finally accept Jeongguk’s attempt to ask you out?

"Can't resist his bambi eyes, can you?" Jimin laughed on the other line. Your best friend called right after your short phone conversation with your dad. It was like everyone was interested in your business tonight.

"It's just one date, Jimin," you rolled your eyes, yet the blush in your cheeks indicated that Jimin was right.

You still couldn't resist Jeon Jeongguk.

It wasn't like you were giving into him. No. It would take more than his wide, doe eyes to melt your cold, cold heart. He hurt you after all.

But last night was different.

You were supposed to have dinner with your subordinates since it was Friday, but then you spotted Jeongguk waiting outside the building of your small law firm.

He was standing there with trembling lips. Your soulmate was freezing under the cold winter, yet he still chose to wait for you.

You see, Jeon Jeongguk was banned from entering your office. You told the securities not to let him in since he was distracting everyone at work.

Your employees just couldn't stop gushing over your soulmate to the point that they weren't able to finish their task for the day. They were always trying to get Jeongguk's attention and the most annoying part was that your soulmate didn't seem to mind—not because he was a flirt too. It was actually because he was too naïve for his own good.

So yeah. You banned him from entering the building because he was a distraction and definitely not because you were blinded by your stupid jealousy. No. Not at all.

He was your soulmate, yes, but it didn't mean you had to stay together. The only thing you two should do was to try to be casual and not hate each other.

You couldn't afford to make Jeongguk hate you. This was the only rational reason why you agreed to go out on a date with him tonight. You were just scared and guilty for letting him wait for you in the snow.

"Whatever you say," you could imagine Jimin's teasing expression despite not seeing his face. "Have fun, okay? Love you!"

"Ditto! See you soon," you pressed the end bottom of your phone as your doorbell rang.

Seven pm. You bit your lower lip, glancing at the clock. Jeongguk was right on time. He told you last night that he would be outside of your door at exactly seven in the evening.

You sighed and fixed your hair a little before opening the door.

Jeongguk practiced speaking the things he would say to you tonight in front of the mirror. He swore he prepared so hard because he didn't want to disappoint you. He felt like this was his only shot with you, unfortunately it seemed like he was destined to fuck things up with you again.

"Oh fuck," his eyes dilated upon seeing you.

You were wearing this pretty dress that accentuated your curves. You looked so expensive and exquisite that Jeongguk felt like he was out of place.

Your soulmate was wearing a thick sweater and black sweatpants. His hair was messier because of the winter wind.

"You're not dressed." This was the first thing you said to him. The scowl on your face made him think that you already regretted agreeing to spend this night with him.

He was wrong. You were only frowning because you felt embarrassed. You took your sweet time preparing for this date. You even rushed to buy a fancy dress just this morning, causing you to feel like a fool.

It was clear now that you were more excited than the man who practically begged you to go out with him.

"I-I just thought it'd be better to stay home because of the weather." The boy said sheepishly while showing you the home cooked food he had prepared for this date.

You swallowed hard.

"Come in." And then you opened the door wider for him.

Jeongguk let out a sigh of relief. At least you did not kick him out. He wouldn't know what to do if that happened. He missed your home so much. He missed Miri as well. Too bad the fury pet wasn't around.

Miri visited the Kims' mansion every Saturday. Red picked the cat earlier this day. She said Miri was the only one that could make Soobin smile. Red and Seokjin, the newlywed couple, were only allowed to visit Soobin every Saturday. They always take the little boy to a nice place with your cat Miri.

Jeongguk realized that it was a blessing in disguise that the cat wasn't around since no one was scratching the couch where you and him currently sat on.

Jeongguk's idea for this date night was to simply watch some movies while eating. He thought that this was the perfect plan, sadly it looked like you didn't share the same sentiment.

"Jeongguk," irritation was laced in your voice as you called your soulmate's name.

You were irritated for the reason that you felt like he didn't really want to be here.

Jeongguk seemed preoccupied. It was apparent when you asked him what film he wanted to watch. He simply said 'whatever you want," while staring at you blankly.

You let it pass at first, but you couldn't ignore it now that the movie had ended and it appeared like he didn't even realize.

Jeongguk was silent beside you, but he couldn't sit without fidgeting. The air was awkward. He looked awkward, like he was uncomfortable or something. He wasn't even eating his food.

"Did you like the movie? Were you scared?"

"Uh," Jeongguk was staring again. "I'm...yeah. It's pretty scary,"

"Oh." You narrowed your eyes at him. "I didn't know you were afraid of zombies."

"Yeah. I am," he wasn’t and you knew it.

You huffed, crossing your arms. He was such a liar.

"The movie that we just watched," you gritted your teeth. "Isn't about zombies, Jeongguk. It's not even a horror film. It's Toy Story 4!"

You were annoyed. Why did Jeongguk even ask to be with you when he wasn’t going to pay attention to you or to the things the two of you were supposed to do?

"I'm sorry..."

And there's it again. The insincere apology. He was always sorry, but he never changed.

"You know what? Just go home. I..." You trailed off as tears filled your eyes.

Why did you always have to make a fool of yourself because of him?

"I don't want you here."

Jeongguk's heart sank upon hearing the words that left your mouth.

"No please," he also turned pale, eyes turning wide because he wasn't expecting this date to turn out like this. What he wanted to happen was to enjoy the winter night cuddled with you as the two of you watched a romantic movie.

Jeongguk imagined watching Love 911 to give you an idea of some of the things he wanted to try with you.

"What do you mean no? It's obvious that you don't want to be here. You're not even paying attention."

"It's not like that," he avoided your gaze.

You only scoffed. Typical Jeongguk. Always telling you that you didn't get him.

"Then what is it? Why do you look uncomfortable? Why do you look like you don't want to be here—"

"I told you it's not like that!" He was staring at you using those big eyes. His thin beckoning lips protruded into a pout.

"I just!" He sighed like he found it hard to explain what he felt. "Can't concentrate on other things because all I can think about is you!”

"What—"

He didn't let you finish. Jeongguk was rambling. He was nervous. He didn't want you to get mad at him again.

"Your dress really looks so good on you and your make up is really nice. You're really pretty...and really beautiful and really sexy and I really just...really—"

"Huh." you pouted, slightly cringing because of his excessive use of the word really. "So now you're blaming the way I look?"

You were teasing him to get rid of the funny feeling in your stomach. Damn Jeongguk for confusing the hell out of you. You were supposed to be annoyed, but why were you smiling?

And why the hell was it so easy to melt into him?

"No!" Jeongguk groaned. He was getting frustrated. You seemed to always twist his words and extrapolate things.

"Look..." He closed his eyes since he couldn't bear to look at you anymore. He was scared to see the disappointment in your eyes.

"I just love you okay? Like really, really, in love with you."

Jeongguk's heartbeat doubled when you didn't speak.

Silence engulfed the whole room that he was forced to open his eyes.

His heart went even crazier. It was beating erratically.

Why were you staring at him with an agape mouth?

"What did you say?" You were no longer in the mood to fool around. Sure, you were teasing Jeongguk, but it didn't mean he could also joke about feelings and love.

It wasn't fair.

"I love you?" Jeongguk said, unsure.

He wasn't unsure of his feelings. He just didn't know if you were referring to the last words he uttered.

"You...love me?" You were still in doubt.

Jeongguk simply nodded his head; a soft smile was plastered on his lips as he scrunched his nose. You knew this look well. This was his genuine self and it only meant one thing.

He wasn't lying.

"But..." you bit the inside of your cheek. "This is the first time you told me that."

"I thought it's obvious?" Jeongguk mirrored your confused expression.

He expressed what he felt for you by singing. Jeongguk thought you understood.

You did not. The song lifted your spirit and you also found the gesture sweet, but you still didn't realize it was his way of confessing.

"I mean..." Jeongguk pouted his lips more. "Your eyes tell, right? You can see colors now."

As soon as these words escaped his mouth, Jeongguk felt like he had been hit by a truck—crushing his bones and telling him how stupid he was for crossing the street even though there were signs that told him to stop.

Signs.

The signs had been there all along.

"You love me..." Jeongguk blurted out. His realization was too sudden that he couldn't help but a cry a little.

You panicked as you asked him what was wrong.

"I wasted six months because of how stupid I am!" His answer was unclear.

"Gukkie," you put your hands on the either side of his shoulder, urging him to look at you. "You're not making sense. Speak slowly."

Jeongguk shook his head, tears still painting his cheeks. It was funny how the situation kept on turning around. Just a few breaths ago, you were the one who was on the verge of crying.

"I told you you didn't understand!" Jeongguk was still not making sense, but you decided to stay quiet and let him speak.

It looked like he needed an outlet for the reason that his emotions were overflowing.

"I left b'cause I thought...you...d-din't love me!" He sobbed and your heart cracked.

How could he think this way when all you had ever done was make him feel the love you felt for him?

Jeongguk's twisted expression told you that you had voiced out the question running inside your mind out loud.

"I called you delusional since I believed that you really are," he was bringing back the wounds that you were trying so hard to forget.

Still, you didn't stop him from speaking.

"H-How can you be sure you love me when I myself know that I am not worthy of your love?"

Jeongguk knew that he had always been mean to you. He hadn't done anything to make you fall in love with him that was why he was questioning your feelings.

It wasn't him whom you loved. It was the idea of him being your soulmate. You liked the thought that there was someone out there for you.

It made sense now, though. The fact that he could see colors brightly made him realize that your feelings were real, but it didn't mean he understood your reasons.

Jeongguk stood by his statement. He was unworthy of your love.

"You're not doubting yourself, Jeongguk." You shook your head at him, proving him otherwise. "You are doubting my feelings for you."

This wasn't about Jeongguk's beliefs. This was about you. You grew up thinking that when you felt like everything was collapsing, your only choice was to trust what you feel was right. It's because at the end of the day, you were going to be the one to face the consequence of your actions—not your parents, not your friends, and not even your soulmate. They would be affected by your decisions, yes, but only indirectly.

They could make their own choices that would directly affect their lives even if their choice was based on your decision. People would end up having different results even though they walked on the same path.

"But why me?" Jeongguk sounded broken as he asked this. It hurt you to think that he really thought so lowly of himself.

He couldn't be blamed. He loved Red before; however, it was still not enough. He had moved on from her, but it didn't mean that all the scars would fade away.

His first breakup up caused him to think that despite giving your one hundred percent, it would still be lacking for some people.

But you weren't some people.

You were you and you had your reason.

"Sometimes you don't need a reason to love someone." Your reason was not having a reason at all.

Your soulmate wasn't sure if he agreed to what you said.

Jeongguk didn't believe that just because things existed, it was already valid. Validation cannot be valid if one would not give enough reasons to prove why it's worth validating.

This was the reason why Jeongguk was questioning the love you claimed you felt. He needed reasons. He was just a human after all—always in need of affection and reassurance.

"I mean...I tried thinking of a reason why I shouldn't love you, but I just can't find any." Your confession made Jeongguk blush.

You had always been straight forward.

The way you loved was the opposite of how your soulmate loved. This was probably the explanation why it took him long to admit his feelings for you.

As stated, Jeongguk was in constant need of reason. His drawings of you were his proof of the love he felt.

"If you can't find any reason, then just allow me to tell you the million reasons why I love you."

He didn't wait for your answer. Jeongguk simply moved closer to you. His face was just inches away from yours.

"You're smart." And then he kissed your forehead.

You weren't only a book smart. You were emotionally intelligent. You had taught Jeongguk a lot of things, especially when it came to forgiveness and compassion.

"You're brave." He kissed you left eye.

He remembered the night you told him you liked him. It was in front of many people. You didn't hesitate even when he was running away.

"You're patient and understanding," he kissed your right eye.

You tried to understand Jeongguk's annoying attitude.

"You work hard in all aspects." He kissed your nose.

"You're beautiful," he kissed your left cheek.

You really were. Inside and out.

"It's you,"

Jeongguk didn't know if he could love someone who wasn't you.

"Most importantly, I love you because you are my soulmate." And then he kissed you on the lips.

You laughed in between the kiss, but you didn't stop kissing him back.

Did you forgive him?

The answer was yes.

Were you ready to love him again?

Perhaps.

Were you still hurt by his actions before?

Yes.

Did you want to be with him?

Yes.

There were many questions flooding your mind right now. Some of your answers might not be the truth, maybe you were just too happy right now—caught up in the moment because you were in Jeongguk's arms again.

But it didn't matter now because one thing was sure.

You were willing to love Jeon Jeongguk again because you didn't want to repeat his mistake.

You didn't want to lose your soulmate just because of hatred and denial.

Things were clear now.

Jeon Jeongguk loved you and the world was no longer black and white.

BONUS: (a poem made by young OC that made her realize why she should trust her own feelings)

holy. after 6 weeks???? i’m finally done writing this baby. wow. thank you thank you everyone for reading this—especially those people who never failed to send me feedback. i love you all!

New fic alert! READ HERE >> SAVE ME - Demon!Taehyung x Doctor!Reader

YES. I LIKE USING BTS’ songs as the title of my fanfics. 😅

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chocodollxren · 2 years

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cw: a bit of an unhealthy mindset, talk about children’s pageants, gold-digging, and if you have a problem with his sexuality and gender feel free to screw off! my mc is a bit different than the typical all life is good, everyone loves me, so hopefully this doesn’t sound edgy?? yes he’s a gold digging gay creature.

picrew x, edited hairstyle and colours.

<33 headcanons grim soon, just had to speedrun and post this! in support of posts like this, and this, as a way to openly announce that if this offends you then go ahead and block, I’ve decided to (poorly) draw my mc despite not being an artist! they are genderfluid and currently use he/him, but his pronouns do change quite a bit, during his first summoning he used she/her, and later he/him, and back and forth. he doesn’t care if people misuse his pronouns, though- so long as they respect him and how he chooses to dress/act. please note this is my own gender and do not call me confused.

he originates from shibuya, japan. from a young age he had participated, due to his mom’s desires, for children’s beauty pageants. she ended up wracking a massive debt from the countless years that she ended up leaving the family, where he still believes one day she will return- as long as he pays off her debts. he lives alone with his dad who mainly works, and doesn’t actually go home often, as he’s poor, he makes a lot of rich friends or dates the rich kids of his school or neighboring places.

he’s biromantic asexual, his type is mainly those who have money. he’s not shy to admit to being a gold digger, because he hates being reminded of his debts and how he’s poor. as of late though, he’s come to understand that his looks aren’t everything that matter after coming to the college, where his friends won’t bend over and serve him like back at home, just because he’s a pretty dumb people pleaser- something he has mixed feelings about.

if he weren’t from another world he’d definitely be amongst the pomefiore students as his makeup skills are high tier, and his outfits are always beautiful despite seemingly having no money. to him, beauty and money are both very important as they mean he’s closer to bringing his mom back home.

hope my bad art doesn’t look eye-bleeding…

Yuma Hoshishima

age: 16

gender & orientation: Bio male but Genderfluid, Biromantic Asexual

dorm: Ramshackle, Prefect

from: Shibuya, Japan

class: 1-A

best subject: Animal Linguistics (wants to pet them)

worst subject: Physical Ed (refuses to sweat, constantly falls)

unique magic: none

The Ramshackle dorm prefect, who makes it very well known they came from a different world, during the entrance ceremony. they tend to change their pronouns and really hates when someone calls them poor, or tells them to face reality. they know fully well that their mom will never return no matter how beautiful, rich, or famous they become and yet they still have hope deep down. they’re cynical, and cunning with a love for the high life, but hides behind a cute smile and adorable outfits, innocently draining a person’s pockets. as of late, however, they’ve come to stop putting so much distrust in others and toned down their snobby behavior, actually working hard, due to their newfound friendships.

He sucks up to people he believe will benefit him but after Ace and a flustered Deuce, someone who had never been flirted with in his life, rejected his flirting to make them do his work, he’s come to realize he isn’t the greatest. still definitely and shamelessly flirts with the jocks, and any rich kid flaunting their money, but is now a social media influencer who does part-time modeling to afford expenses he wants, not needs. he’s been rejected and put in his place by a lot of students around him, such as Riddle, Leona, Jamil, and even Vil, telling him to stop thinking his pretty face will get him far in life. he’s extremely used to his pampered parasite lifestyle though, and still needs a lot of work.

he’s a casual flirt and easily breaks up with people. so far he’s dated about 5 students. he’s trying to go for one of each dorm, but the other half of his conscience says to stop casual flirting. however, he finds it enjoyable to cuddle Riddle who rejected him at least 10x and ask him out on a date before pouting, and moving to the next person he knows will reject him. Ace has asked if he simply enjoys being rejected, and with a bright smile, he responded he loved when he was rejected- as it meant he wasn’t just a pretty face anymore.

his mental health isn’t the best, being a prior experience where couldn’t look himself in the mirror without feeling disgust after his mom ‘left’ him and his dad behind and sometimes still feels upset to look at his body thinking he’s not pretty enough and maybe if he were just taller and slimmer like her, a gorgeous and bright young lady, she’d say she was proud. he really hates comments about his body being “natural” and gorgeous as though he didn’t work hard to restrain himself and try to stay in the ideal pageant body type.

he isn’t shipped with anyone, as of late. he’d probably not be open to relationships with friends due to a fear of losing them as he finds himself happier rejected and able to act like himself, a scumbag, rather than cute and cuddly pouting and winking for money like a hottub twitch streamer.

his mom is dead and he knows. he had always known but chose to believe what his dad said, she left with the debt as he couldn’t handle the thought of her never coming back and lovingly embracing him while saying everything would be alright- he lives in a delusion that she will one day return proudly telling him he’s worked hard enough to pay off her debts before she could knowing full well that will never happen, as her condition caused her to have withered away. not sure how in-depth to make an intro post?? but could definitely make a whole toyhou.se on him/her. current you can refer to them as he, until i explicitly state they’re feeling feminine that they or month, or feel free to use them. they don’t use neopronouns like ver, xe, so their gender just flows between m and f.

thank you for reading! this was a little heavy, but to me an OC specifically means a realistic person with their own struggles, ugly side, and pretty side. not everyone has the ideal mental and physical health, Mary Sue personality, and easily changes their personality or mindset instantaneously. please do not write about mental health or disabilities, certain cultures, or other things you do not do your research about- I tread on heavy topics but do not do it to insult others. it’s very obvious my oc does not have the healthiest of mindsets, and that is not something you should aspire to have, as well. you are beautiful and perfect the way you are- the point of his mentality is shaped via his environment though, as whether intentional or not pageant children do feel stess and pressure which affects them later on, only believing that looks matter most. personally, pageants are disgusting if they’re meant for children and i dislike them with every fiber of my being. if you think forcing kids into beauty contents and forcing babies to teens to dress up for people to constantly judge doesn’t have its toll on mental health, please do not interact and learn about sympathy.

#＃—;❝ 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. ❞[🍵]#twst oc #twisted wonderland oc #twst mc #twst wonderland mc

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ilovebeingcalledawhore · 3 years

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Content: fluff

Summary: When two teenagers meet at their highschool’s pool, they form a connection with the same love and longing for the sea and at some point they just find themselves falling in love, quite literally.

Pools, indoor swimming pools.

The moment I found out my highschool had indoor swimming pools at the back part of the gym, I was immediately won over. Swimmers trained early in the morning but the pools were left open but no student ever bothered to actually hang in there except for me.

After school, I get tutoring from teachers ‘till seven pm. Right before I go home I walk to the pools and just sit there. I watch the moonlight hitting the water.

Most of the time I stare at myself, maybe dip my fingers into the water.

It was the perfect place to rest. In there, I felt like nothing else mattered. I’d even call it a sanctuary. It was a safe place to run when all else breaks down.

Pausing the music playing through my earphones. I shove my phone into my bag and push the big grey gym door open.

Empty, as usual.

I walk through the dark and quiet basketball court - my eyes lighting up at the sight of the pool shown through its clear glass entrance door. Pushing it open, I sigh in satisfaction as the smell entered my nose.

I loved this place.

I was quietly walking when all of a sudden, “who are you?”

“Ahhh!” I scream, completely startled by the voice of whoever was in there. I start looking around and see a boy sitting by the pools edge. He had dark messy hair and the school uniform on. His pants were rolled up ending just above his knees so it wouldn’t get wet meanwhile his feet up to his shin were underwater.

“I’m gonna leave,” I mutter and I hear him chuckle as a response. “You’re already here, might as well stay.” He speaks softly and something about his voice attracted me. Though it took me a few seconds to finally agree, I sat at the other side of the pool. My legs crossed but my fingers dipped in the water

It was quiet but something about the silence was comforting, it didn’t feel awkward, it felt like being around an old friend. Clearing my throat to cut the silence, I start the converstaion with words that were on the tip of my tongue. “I’ve never seen you here before,” I speak, looking up to observe the way he replies. A half-hearted grin appears on his lips and he says, “I just found out about this yesterday and I needed it.”

My eyebrows furrow, how do you need a pool? I thought to myself - ‘till I remembered why I was here all along. “You needed it?” I asked and he nodded, finally looking up making your eyes meet. I felt my heart gradually start racing but I try to ignore it. “Yes, the beaches have been locked away and I needed water.” His reply made my heart swell because I felt the exact same way.

Beaches have been locked out ‘cause there was too much trash in them. The government finally took action and started a cleaning movement but volunteers weren’t allowed. They wanted the world to ignore it while they hid away the problems. I sighed in empathy, “I’m Y/n,” I say - our eyes connecting once more. “I’m Mark, Mark Lee.”

The very next day, I found myself walking back to the pools but this time with the slight hope of the mysterious boy to be there. Pushing the glass door open, I immediately look around but see no one. My heart drops in disappointment but I push the feeling away. I walked back to my spot, this time dipping my feet in. I didn’t have any problems ‘cause I was wearing the school’s skirt.

Taking out the small black speaker from my bag, I connect it to my phone and start playing my favourite song. I sigh in satisfaction, I felt good. Today wasn’t a stressful day, it was calm and went by smoothly - I was definitely in a great mood.

As I start to hum with the music mindlessly, I kept staring at the moonlight hitting the edges of the pool and little sparkle it made with the water, it was pretty. Everything was quiet and calm when all of a sudden I hear the same familiar voice from yesterday but this time, he was singing along to the song.

I yelped, completely startled by his sudden presence.

I turned around and saw him rolling the hem of his pants so he can dip his feet into the water. “You scared me!” I whisper and he smiled as a response. That was the first time I saw him give a genuine smile - and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make me feel some type of way.

He finally dips his feet into the water and starts singing along to the music once more. I just sat there and admired him and his voice. He looked good under that moonlight but I was too shy to say it out loud, even admit to it. So I look away distracting myself, waiting for the song to end.

Then it did.

“You sing good,” I compliment him and he scratches the nape of his neck shyly.

A month has passed and the safe haven was now a habit. Even on nights when I’m told to come home early, I always find a way to come to the pools. Even for a minute, even for a few seconds, most of the time not for the water but for him.

In all honesty if I had to label him as anything, it’d be a human diary. He knows much more than my friends who I’ve been with for a year. I don’t know what it is about it but, telling your secrets to a stranger feels much more comforting.

At this point we know each others favourite colour, movie, song, artist. What we want to be when we grow up - what we don’t want to be when we grow up. What type of person we want to fall in love with - if were even in love with ourselves. Does he think aliens are real? How ‘bout mermaids? I know his dreams, goals, secrets, trauma, his biggest fear and his greatest regret and in equality, he knows mine.

Though I hate to admit to it, he makes my days. His presence, his voice, his thoughts - it came to the point where I don’t want to sleep anymore ‘cause for the first time reality was better.

Smiling to myself as I quietly walked through the gym to get to the pools. I push the door open but freeze, my hands still on the metal handle of the door. I heard sniffling and sobbing. At that very moment my heart dropped. If I were to expect anything it wasn’t this.

“Mark...” I whisper, but the whisper was enough to echo through the room in it’s silence. Finally walking in, I shut the door and quickly walking towards the pool. The image broke my heart. He sat there, his legs crossed together - not dipped in the water like I’m used to. “What’s wrong?” My brows furrow as I walked towards him.

He continued to sob into his hands, biting his lip to silence himself. But when he finally put his hands down, the tears running down his face made me sit next to him and hug him without hesitation. We’ve never been this close, only ever sitting across each other on different sides of the pool. He melts into me, his head going into the crook of my neck but this time, he started crying some more; not loudly but silently.

The tears just continued to roll down onto my shirt making me sigh in empathy.

Like I always do when my friends cry, I rub their heads in comfort. “It’ll get better,” I whisper and he nods into me. I look down to see if he’s calmed down but right when I do, our eyes meet. I give him a little smile, wiping the last tear that ran down his cheek.

We just sat there, our eyes connected somehow healing each other quietly. Taking in deep breaths, I continue to caress his face. When I cried, it was something my mom did to comfort me. “You feel better?” I ask and he looks away. “Yeah,” he whispers as he looks down and observes our other hand interlocked with each others. Something even I didn’t notice.

Mindlessly looking around, him still in your arms, you notice a small black bug atleast three meters away from you. “Oh my god,” you mutter, eyes getting wide and heartbeat racing as it crawled fast and closer towards you. “Ah!” You scream, frantically moving around but not making much progress ‘cause of the boy laying on you. “Mark there’s a bug!” You scream.

He turns around and sees the bug almost a meter away and he panics too. In all that movement you found yourselves with no other option but the pool. Panickly falling in you, you drag the boy with you.

“Ahhh!”

It was a split second underwater until you rose up again to take in air. As you did, you didn’t realise that the boy was so close to you, it was only until you calmed down that you felt his breath hit your lips. Smiling in amusement as you looked at each others state, you laugh in disbelief, observing your now extremely wet uniform.

“Mom’s gonna kill me,” you mutter to yourself but he chuckles to it. Slowly, you feel one of his arms wrapping around your waist and pulling you closer leaving no space in between your bodies. His other hands crawls up your arm, to your neck, to your chin making you face him.

Silence.

Hearts racing.

Hearts synching.

Seconds later his lips were on yours. His teeth bites into your lower lip drawing you closer. Your eyes widen in realisation, making you pull away gently. “What?” You ask, bewildered but not complaining. “No questions, just kiss me.” He replies and your breath hitches as he makes your legs wrap around his waist. “Kiss me,” he says again and without anymore hesitation, you do.

Bodies tangled.

Wet and messy hair.

Eyes shut.

Lips locked.

You fell in love, quite literally.

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jadelynlace · 3 years

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Omg i know u said ink drinker ivar started to show y/n who he really is more when he fell for her, but like, i wanna get to know this man! Who is he? Can u tell us more about his personality and values? Like what r his vibes? Ahh i’m so obsessed w him

Oh, who is Ivar?

Well, he's a jack-ass, he's a smooth talker, he's a nerd, he's a sarcastic shit, he's a protector, all rolled into one. He likes his hoodies and his leather jackets, his combat boots, his mustang, and not admitting to the fact he needs to wear his glasses more often than he should.

Honestly, I don't even know where to begin, he lives rent-free in my mind. There's no end to how he rolls through my brain, and if this doesn't answer your questions I apologize. There's just so much.

I think first and foremost, Ivar is loyal. He's the most loyal person you'll ever meet. Or, he can be the meanest. It's all going to depend on how he's treated. He's pretty relaxed when it comes to just existing in the room with him. He'll keep to himself, draw, play on his phone, play video games. He's comfortable with his own company. That tends to happen when you close yourself off. You have to learn to rely on yourself, and there's nothing wrong with enjoying your own solitude.

Now, his values. Ivar is a family guy. With limits. He's a mama's boy through and through, there's no denying that. He'd walk through hell to see his mom smile. To make her proud. He loves her more than anything, and after watching what she went through from his father, God, Ivar can't believe just how strong some people can be. That's another thing he loves about you: your strength. When his parents finally split, when he and Hvitserk were just finishing high school, he really learned the core value of family. And that, family, is whoever you want it to be. Like, everyone always says "you only get one family!" Well yeah, and you only get one appendix, and when it fucks with you, you cut it out of your life. Ivar values strong relationships. His mother, Floki, Hvitserk, you. A few close friends from past tattoo conventions, people who do his craft as well as he does. Ivar also values children; he values treating children with respect, he knows what he went through as a child. He would never wish that on an innocent kid. I say it time and time again, Ivar is great with kids. Kids want to be loved, they want to be accepted and encouraged, and safe. Ivar will give them that. And hell, not even his own kids. His nephews, Floki's boys, friends of his with little ones. Cousins, relatives, yours or his. Those kids flock to Ivar because his energy is just so...pure. You swear he makes a friend with a child everywhere he goes.

He values the freedom to express himself. He's an artist, he'll draw until his fingers bleed and fall off. And then he'll draw some more. He values an environment that's not overly stressful. He still doesn't get how you and Hvitserk manage some of the shit you both have to deal with. He values acceptance. And that should be no surprise. (Looking directly at you Ragnar.) He values the ability to be alone, to be left alone, without being questioned. Sometimes, he just wants to go into his studio and exist. And that's fine. He'll come back, and he really loves that you let him be. You tell him that dinner's on the stove if he's hungry, you'll be reading if he needs you. He sometimes just needs to let his brain chill. To listen to some music and create art.

As far as his personality... Ivar is a geek. He'll geek out about math, about superheroes, about Star Wars, Marvel, DC, and True Crime. About sports. About the latest and greatest in the world of tattoos. He's silly when he wants to be, he makes you laugh harder than anyone you've ever met. He's witty and sarcastic and God, sometimes you just want to smack him. Sometimes you want to put that mouth to better use.

This brings me to my next point. Your pleasure is Ivar's pleasure. He gets off on making you cum, on making you feel incredible. He gets off on watching your head tip back, on how your body moves, and how it's for him to worship. The filth that can pour from his mouth, about what he wants to do with you--sometimes you swear he only thinks with a different head than the one on his shoulders.

He's a protector. If someone fucks with you, he's there to see it through. And maybe to remind you that murder is wrong. If someone is giving Hvitserk shit, Ivar will kick ass and take names. Anyone so dares to look sideways at you, at his mother, oh Lord. Get life insurance.

He gets too far into his own head more often than he doesn't. He's his own worst enemy and worst critic. He holds himself to an impossibly high standard, so much that he'll never reach it. He's a perfectionist. He's a neat freak, and you can't believe he's the youngest of five boys. He'll clean up after himself, everything in his apartment has a place. It's borderline obsessive, but neatness makes him content. Probably because his brain is so messy.

He's not a perfect person, no one is. He gets stuck in his ways, he can be defensive. He can be moody, and he can be confused when you tell him to talk through what he's thinking. That concept is so foreign for him because he doesn't want to scare you with his thoughts. Because sometimes, they scare him. When he offers help, to you or anyone, and it's not immediately accepted, he gets angry. There are subtle underlying anger issues when it comes to certain scenarios. He has a history of unstable past relationships, with Ragnar, and women he's gone after. He fears abandonment and can get clingy. And then when he sees himself doing that, he'll become withdrawn, he doesn't want to annoy you. He walked on eggshells for a while, before he really opened up about a lot of this, because he didn't want to lose you. You'd never leave Ivar for expressing himself. For simply communicating. That was new to him too. Emotions, feelings, they were bottled up and he was taught to keep them that way. He doesn't want to be alone in his life. He wants to love and be loved for who he is.

I apologize if this didn't answer your questions or help at all. I'm always down to answer more "specific" questions or blabber about HCs if that helps. 😅

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