#how was i supposed to know

[inkskinned]

sometimes we just need someone to pay enough attention.

for the longest time i had been trying to read The Lord of The Rings. everyone had sung the praises for it, over and over. i'd seen clips of the movie and it seemed like it could be fun, but actually reading it was fucking horrible.

my parents had the omnibus - all the books squished into one big tome - and in the 4th grade i started sort of an annual tradition: i would start trying to read TLR and get frustrated after about a month and put it back down. at first i figured i was just too young for it, and that it would eventually make sense.

but every time i came back to it, i would find myself having the exact same experience: it was confusing, weird, and dry as a fucking bone. i couldn't figure it out. how had everyone else on earth read this book and enjoyed it? how had they made movies out of this thing? it was, like, barely coherent. i would see it on "classics" list and on every fantasy/sci-fi list and everyone said i should read it; but i figured that it was like my opinion of great expectations - just because it's a classic doesn't mean i'm going to like experiencing it.

at 20, i began the process of forcing myself through it. if i had to treat the experience like a self-inflicted textbook, i would - but i was going to read it.

my mom came across me taking notes at our kitchen table. i was on the last few pages of the first book in the omnibus, and i was dreading moving on to the next. she smiled down at me. only you would take notes on creative writing. then she sat down and her brow wrinkled. wait. why are you taking notes on this?

i said the thing i always said - it's boring, and i forget what's happening in it because it's so weird, and dense. and strange.

she nodded a little, and started to stand up. and then sat back down and said - wait, will you show me the book?

i was happy to hand it over, annoyed with the fact i'd barely made a dent in the monster of a thing. she pulled it to herself, pushing her glasses up so she could read the tiny writing. for a moment, she was silent, and then she let out a cackle. she wouldn't stop laughing. oh my god. i cannot wait to tell your father.

i was immediately defensive. okay, maybe i'm stupid but i've been trying to read this since the 4th grade and -

she shook her head. raquel, this is the Silmarillion. you've been reading the Silmarillion, not the lord of the rings.

anyway, it turns out that the hobbit and lord of the rings series are all super good and i understand why they're recommended reading. but good lord (of the rings), i wish somebody had just asked - wait. this kind of thing is right up your alley. you love fantasy. it sounds like something might be wrong. why do you think it's so boring?

#thanks for reminding me this happened #writeblr #warm up #i don't think this story translates well to the page #IRONIC!!!! :) #but yeah man i read the Silmarillion before i read the hobbit #the omnibus didn't explain what it was and i figured - you start at the beginning and then you read from the beginning #that's how books work #how was i supposed to know #EDIT IN THE TAGS: hi i think i worded this in a confusing way #the omnibus had ALL the stories in it - the silm #the hobbit #and all of LOTR #they just put the silm in the front so i thought logically it was the first book #that's how an omnibus usually works after all - the first book in the series is the first book in the tome #to be fair i GUESS the silm takes place “before” the hobbit????

[rottmnt-residuum]

found out im an idiot today

#residuum memes #in my defense i don't watch horror #how was i supposed to know #i just thought i was doing a realism take on the genre

[takemetodragonstone]

they warned me this was the autism webbed site, but I never thought I would catch the autism!!!

#this is my way of saying hey guys i think im autistic #(please take this joke in good faith i obviously don’t think autism is contagious) #i thought everyone had meltdowns when their favorite hoodie was slightly itchier than usual #how was i supposed to know #(that’s how my morning is going btw. im in itchiness hell. I could change. but I wanted to wear this hoodie today so I have to u feel me??) #autism #neurodivergent

[i-dont-talk-for-days-on-end]

I've just watched "The Six Napoleons" and HELP, why has no one warned me about Lestrade telling Holmes in the end that he's not jealous of him for solving the case, but proud, and Holmes tearing up a bit?! I'm not okay!!

(Not to mention the way in which Holmes said "thank you" twice, first quite loudly and rashly to cover that he's actually touched, and then again, much more sincerely and quietly!!!)

#how was I supposed to handle this?? #the whole episode was super silly #with the different languages and accents and Lestrade being so sure and still wrong (as always) #and the idée fixe about the anarchist conspiracy #HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW #okay bye #good night #sherlock holmes #lestrade #granada holmes #jeremy brett #i always feel like I'm using adverbs incorrectly #help me english native speakers :D

[legally-done-with-this]

I’ve seen the abbreviation TFW so many times recently and I’ve assumed it meant “The Fucking Winchesters” but apparently it means team free will?? Who knew

#supernatural #the winchesters #team free will #how was i supposed to know #its pretty much the same thing

[augustheart]

just walked to work. got my biscuit and mocha from the coffee shop. loitered a bit. thought “wow usually [manager] is here by now, it’s like 9:55!” loitered some more. ate some biscuit. peeked into the store through the door because i don’t have a key. saw a sign on the door about fifteen minutes after arriving. sign says “we will be closed march 31st!” why? i don’t know. i go sit outside the coffee shop because i might as well finish my breakfast. sudden realization. It’s Easter

#NOBODY TOLD ME IT’S EASTER #HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW

[garnetcapricorn]

finished my ariana cardigan ✌️

turned out fucking huge, which does make it pretty cozy... but I'm gonna try again later with smaller yarn& hook to make one for going out

#crochet #granny square #crochet sweater #crochet cardigan #the pattern only had 2 sizes #so i made the bigger one #how was i supposed to know

[escapism-from-the-real-world]

I hate it when the drawing tips I’ve been told for literal years but didn’t do because I thought it was dumb actually work. Like, my art is actively improving as I implement these tips and follow directions.

Bitch, I thought you were exaggerating. This looked boring as hell but now my art look good so what am I supposed to do about it?

#art #art struggles #art tips #trying to find the easy way out #only to find out the way out was back there with the bright flashing lights and arrows and people pointing to the door #how was i supposed to know

[koool-thing]

How was I supposed to know how to use a tube amp? How was I supposed to know how to drive a van? How was I supposed to know how to ride a bike without hurting myself? How was I supposed to know how to make dinner for myself? How was I supposed to know how to hold a job? How was I supposed to remember to grab my backpack after I set it down to play basketball? How was I supposed to know how to not get drunk every thursday, Friday saturday, and why not sunday? How was I supposed to know how to steer this ship? How the hell was I supposed to steer this ship?!I

HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?

#car seat headrest #csh #Csh ref #do you get it #it's ballad of consta Concordia #great song #how was I supposed to know

[landwriter]

Bite late to the party but absolutely CANNOT stop thinking about your 70s SF au after seeing the Keats/Shelley thoughts. The idea of words and longing and the exquisite agony of all having to read between lines of beautiful words (chef’s kiss).

This au is also giving me serious Tom Sturridge in On the Road vibes (the one where he plays Carlo aka Allen Ginsberg). Have you seen it by any chance? The movie as a whole is unfortunately not great, but there are some brilliant scenes. Such as this gem -

(Okay I’ll show myself out now 😅)

Especially having to read between the lines and trying to express your feelings in this very 'We Two Dear Men, Friends Forever' way right in the midst of this historical microcosm of radically open queerness and community. Or, as Charles Forester, who moved to the Castro neighbourhood in 1971 at the age of 27 puts it: "I was breathing cannoli, fog, and lust."

I've seen Tom Sturridge in nothing but The Sandman! I had no clue he plays an Allen Ginsberg analogue but that's a delightful coincidence because my accidental serious investment into this ask meme answer started when I innocently googled "san francisco 70s literary scene" and found this by Adrian Brooks about the beginnings of San Francisco's queer poetry scene, and went "Hold on, Allen Ginsberg was gay?" (I truly cannot overstate the fact that the extent of my literature knowledge is one very good AP English class - I minored in French Literature and worked in the English department but studied...Political Science.)

I looked it up and found excerpts of his letters with Peter Orlovsky, filled with to the brim with love and wildness and hope. Then I went back to Brooks' piece and saw the poster for the very first gay poetry reading that he organized in 1974, and, well, it all sort of fell apart from there. (handmade poster & more words under the cut)

A funny little fact is that Ginsberg said in 1980, in conversation about oratorical style in English language poetry: "The howl in my style comes from the power [of the sound of the language]---like Shelley." and invokes Ode to the West Wind. Full circle, baby! Full circle!

Anyways I suppose the moral of the story is you can hand me any piece of physical ephemera from the past, a side dish of epistolary love, and I will lose all fucking sensibility and moderation immediately. IMMEDIATELY.

Also: absolutely no such thing about being late to the party if it involves talking to me about my little stories <3 I love it and it's crazy motivational and just like...the equivalent of giving me a warm tea and a pat on the head for Making Things Worthy Of Engagement.

#asks #seventies san francisco au #the sandman #dreamling #i would like to reiterate i LITERALLY named 'seventies' and 'san francisco' ENTIRELY RANDOMLY #HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW #ok self-reflection moment i could probably name any decade and city and find a compelling story and want to share it and retell it #i just (in the tearfully drunken pathos of a wasted white girl) i just love people so so much guys #love the same stories over and over told in different places different times #the same shynesses and worries and tendresse #the banalities and hopes and loves #the fonts might be different but the feelings are the same #and it's real swell imo to feel that connection with humanity past our own lived experience #and see ourselves in people we aren't and places we've never been and times before ours #anyhoot #bit of history #it's an honour to share this here and now with you while talking about a then and there :)

[ghostdrinkssoup]

I’ve been playing omori for the last few days and it took me forever to realise aubrey isn’t kel and hero’s sister </3 by the time I reached the real world segments I was genuinely so confused because kel would be like “aubrey’s really changed…” and I was like ??? your sister ??? why are you acting like you don’t live together 😭

#I literally thought aubrey and kel were twins or something I’m SILLY #it’s my one complaint about the game #the relationships aren’t really clear at first #like aubrey kel and hero all have the same colour palette in headspace #and they all live together in the tree stump + kel and aubrey bicker like siblings #and aubrey treats hero like he’s her older brother #HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW #and I’m kinda mourning that dynamic tbh… it makes more sense to me #but other than that the game is so good I’ve been very hyperfixated on it <3 #omori #omori aubrey #omori kel #omori hero #ghost speaks

[0p1er0]

Beep

WARBLES, SEWAGE IS SUCH A STUPID WORD

#HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW #NO ONE TELLS ME THESE THINGS #I HATE SPELLING #WHAT IS THIS #REEEEEEE #beep #pierre things #PIERRE COMPLAINTS

[on-the-edge-of-dune]

QueenTigris -

#how was i supposed to know #READ their fanfics #its gold #gaara #kankuro #sand siblings #ao3

[bigassbowlingballhead]

SICK AND TWISTED

#mm baby baby #how was i supposed to know #taylor zakhar perez #menace

[lissamaylee]

I'm 25, and I'm still happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way.

#25 years old #how was i supposed to know #pisces #mid twenties

[siriusly-the-best-bi]

Me when I’m doing my morning routine of Tumblr scrolling and checking the trending tags Unaware that Good Omens season 2 leaks have been posted and seeing one completely caught off guard and having a fucking heart attack

#i am #forgetting #i am washing my brain #i will get So High that my brain has no choice but to forget #i cannot believe this has happened #poor neil gaiman im so sorry sir #wtf has the world come to #can’t have any nice things #can’t let fans just enjoy the content and theorize and enjoy mapping out new lore #the anticipation is the BEST FUCKING PART! #getting to plan and wonder and talk with other fans and make beautiful art! #like fuck! #losing my mind! #how was i supposed to know #!!!! #not fair!! #if i knew i would have never checked #damn #bi.f.shit #good omens #good omens season 2