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#i cant justify any of that if i dont have money coming in. im going to miss out on a lot if i cant get work
silverislander · 1 month
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my graduation ceremony is at the end of the month and istg if i still don't have a job/any plan by then i'm going to be unreasonably upset
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dollbutch · 25 days
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Dollypop, got any rap recs?
so ive been planning on doing a series of playlists as a kinda introduction to rap, especially so after the dot vs drake beef has put rap back in the spotlight and made more people than ever actually aware of the lyrical content of these songs, its mostly been an issue of executive function beating my ass 5 ways to sunday lately, but suffice to say rap recommendations has been on my mind a lot lately
i could probably go on for a few hrs about hip hop and its place as the culmination of all music prior, but rap is a genre that more so than others rewards album listening so i will more often than not recommend albums over singles/tracks but ill try my best to isolate what i consider to be a well rounded list (no links cus i dont use spotify lmao)
theres a lotta ways to split up rap and hip hop as a whole into a thousand micro genres, especially when you take regions into consideration but i think im gonna go with just 15 tracks that cover as many bases as i can and give a little explanation for each track starting with
NY State of Mind - Nas: ny state of mind is THE classic in my books, dj premier provides the perfect boom bap beat for nas to make the final push to usher in a new generation of rap, literally sampling eric b and rakim in the chorus, the previous pair to bring the genre from the 80’s into the 90’s, furthering that push with more complex rhyme schemes and blending the street/gangsta rap of nwa and wu-tang with the jazzy introspection and philosophy of de la and tribe, a perfect set piece for the album of a desperate kid rapping and telling his stories like its his last day on earth because it just might be
Doomsday – MF DOOM: the manifesto of a super villain, a rulebook on rap, a re-emergence of a forgotten rapper, after the death of his brother and issues with the record label dropping KMD Zev Love X disappeared in ‘94 and then in ‘99 MF DOOM dropped operation: doomsday, the dizzying rhyme schemes and word play, the casual humor and pop culture and sampling referencing lends to a true statement of a song, that DOOM was here and was gonna change the world
4th Chamber – GZA: a dozen wu-tang tracks could’ve appeared on this list and all would be justified but 4th chamber is my favourite by far, starting with the now iconic samurai or kung fu film sample and then kicking into a crazy intro beat that calms slightly in time for ghostface killah to come in and pick it right back up with the first verse of this slick posse cut
Mathematics – Mos Def: Yasiin Bey Is a genius plain and simple, another track produced by preemo another masterpiece of a beat, Bey raps about the sociological statistics that work to keep the black population down in this mathematically driven guide through the politics of the late 90’s
You Got Me – The Roots: this track really shows just how good live instrumentation can be, black thought is one of the greatest of all time, simple as frankly I don’t have too much more to say its just a brilliant song
Wesley’s Theory – Kendrick Lamar: the opening to the greatest album of all time, opening with the mission statement of the album, the sample at the start before the james brown esque hit me pulls the tone back down to earth, part one of the track being a young kdots reactions to the money hes been looking for and part two kendrick plays the role of uncle sam the mascot of white supremacy looking to exploit over eager black artists and talents and lump them with a bill and lock them up when they cant pay it, the deep seeped politics, the groove of thundercat and george clinton of the parliments and funkadelic collectives and the dr dre break really helps sets the tone of the album
Jazz (We’ve Got) – A Tribe called Quest: the perfect jazz rap song, the beat was original made by pete rock before being remade by q-tip, a quintessential classic of the genre simple as
Shook Ones pt 2 – Mobb Deep: the greatest gangsta rap song of all time and frankly its not close its something spectacular, the hardest two 19 year olds ever sounded, over a dark almost evil beat produced by havoc this track is an absolute landmark for not just queensbridge but the entirety of the east coast
Introvert – Little Simz: this track is nothing short of spectacular, a powerful, cinematic, orchestral masterpiece, deep diving into her inner turmoil and her roots, the corruption of the british government, this song shook me to my core when I first listened to simbi, a rallying cry that calls for a war against the oppressing forces further tightening the chains if we ever are to be freed from the oppression
Don’t Cry – J Dilla: this song is gorgeous, chopping up I cant stand (to see you cry) by the escorts into a wonderful beat, made by jay dee in the final throws of his life, half worked on while hospital bound, frequent collaborator and fellow soulquarian questlove stated that this was a message to his mother as J dilla knew the end was near
Nuthin’ But A G Thang – Dr Dre ft Snoop Dogg: the quintessential G-funk banger the genre doesn’t get better than this
SORRY NOT SORRY – Tyler, The Creator: a weird choice for this list, I wasnt sure if I wanted to include it because its so tied to tylers discography but its honestly one of the best rap songs ever when you have the context, especially when you take into account the music video where tyler and all the various versions of himself stand before an audience of ex’s and other notable judgemental presences in his life, as he kills almost every version of himself barring the ‘ugliest’ sides of himself in igor and goblin era tyler potentially insinuating those parts of him still reside inside him
I Used to Love H.E.R – Common: this song is so very important, maybe the best use of metaphor in the whole genre, a fallen out of love story for that very same genre, fantastic storytelling and a great beat by no I.D. one of the most important producers and figures in hip hop out of chicago
Aquemini – Outkast: the title track from one the duos third album and really the record that put the dirty south on the radar on a nationwide level, a sign of their decision to stick together for as long as possible, andres verses really shows hes one of the all time greats and that big boi is not far behind at all
Hazard Duty Pay – JPEGMAFIA: this song was all I listened to for a few weeks after it release, an aggressive single verse track over a soulful beat what more could you want
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itsdappleagain · 1 year
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hell yeah baby backstory time
it is time for the boston tea party caper!!
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notes under the cut assss always
this episode is a bit of a mix-up for me. i like it but not my favorite all things considered. i'm still excited though- some of the moments in this episode are GOLD
HQ!!!
JHSGHSD "hey red hows san diego" "not great" "im not talking about you girl"
"i thought he lived in the cloud"
player looks so unamused pls
PLEASE "though i am hearing voices again" HOW WAS THAT RELEVANT. WERE U HEARING VOICES BEFORE
shadowsan is the best character here he's so funny
THE "THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT"
if they vowed to use their "superpowers" for good and ivy hotwired that car later on i guess maybe they used to steal cars and then decided to go straight maybe
ivy is so cool
OH hey also by the way their younger designs. SO GOOD carmen should have gotten a dorky in between phase we were robbbbed
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not trey and his butt chin
i like how the screen glitches when its paused on trey. new headcanon this is a powerpoint presentation they threw together right then and there
you dare knock LYDIA
"i got this" zack says with the confidence of a man who just ate taco bell learning they won't see another restroom for eight more hours on the road trip
the talking through the race kills me every time 😭you can't hear each other
man this racetrack has an overhead drone keeping exact pace with the leading car
zack had a chase devineaux phase too once
carmen sandiego: oh no no we're rated for seven year olds!! the boston tea party caper: the mafia boss who lent us money threatened to put a hit out on us if we didn't commit a robbery for him on a suspicious front for a money laundering operation for the mob
the main reason i dislike this episode and need for speed is because zack doesnt ever get to learn. he was impulsive and it was bad in duke of vermeer, he was impulsive and it was bad in boston tea (okay fine, it shows us his younger self! fine with that) BUT THEN HE IS IMPULSIVE AND ITS BAD AGAIN NEXT TIME. FOR THE SAME REASONS whyyy wouldn't they take duke of vermeer as an opportunity to show his growth instead of making him out to be some angry no control childish idiot who sacrifices untold amounts for a little payback. and drags ivy down with him EVERY TIME
there's something so cool and sinister about ivy smiling, reassuring him, and then slowly pulling down the ski mask to hide any emotion. ivy and zack seem like they could have been prime targets for VILE recruitment- they could have gone down a much darker path
shadowsan was so invested
carmen's puberty crammed in those few months between the boat and the boston holy shit
player accidently saved zack and ivy's asses by turning off those cameras jgjsgkd
the second perspective of zack crashing into the wall kills me every time pls
here goes carmen with "its for your own safety" who taught her that phrase
i love how z and i immediately think that this person couldnt possibly be...i dont know. an employee or a manager or someone who works at the donut place. she's gotta be another thief. i mean they are right but like why
the giant ass green vault behind the fridge door 😭
WE'RE FOLLOWIN THAT LADY FOLLOWIN THOSE BREADCRUMBS TO THE DOUGH
wait didn't they arrive in a truck parked on the other side of the building
carmen ALSO had a chase devineaux phase
???? isnt that truck she just stole the one they got there in???
i mean carmen. girl. you kicked them out of their own robbery and then stole their car did you expect them not to follow you
carmen's devineaux side coming out <3 also completely shameless carmen cant drive comic plug
there are so many car accidents literally everyone could have died in for these two (this and need for speed) episodes. credits roll as the paramedics show up to carmen who just CRASHED HER CAR INTO A FUCKING HOLE HEAD FIRST
they had to make sure to show us that carmen was literally the worst driver possible to justify zack being there
i love zack immediately getting super friendly with the random woman who just stole their car, crashed it, and then stole it again with them inside
carmen: haha suave quip zack and ivy, the two most neurodivergent bitches on the planet: IN THE REVOLUTIONARY WAR
also carmen looks hilariously uncomfortable wedged behind this shipping crate. she's experiencing her first infodump
the loaning money joke is actually very funny
i kind of like how awkward carmen still is in some areas. she still talks like a VILE operative- she reports her every move to player, she simply responds with "understood." because thats the only way she knows how to relate
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ANGY
ivy: oh no camera: zooms out to show the most outraged face the animators could draw
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screenshots of all time
can you imagine your weirdgirl little 16 year old classmate dips and you see her a few months later and she's turned into this trenchcoat wearing 5'7" long haired adult woman whose only goal is to make your life a thousand times harder
not quite sure how this episode said "oh yeah. her classmates who knew her as a kid constantly call her by the wrong name and disrespect her despite constant corrections. and also her mother figure, seeing the new her, disowns her with the proclamation that this new person killed her child when she took this new name and betrayed her" and made it not transgender
le chevre was so cool about everything for like three minutes
HEY okay my favorite detail of the show is that when carmen runs in this episode she gets way out of breath because she isn't in shape yet i LOVE that detail
i have never heard more emotion from gina than when she went "YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME"
THROW HER OVERBOARD
el topo is also cool about things for like three minutes
zack and ivy bounce constantly between dumb orange cat energy and golden retriever who would jump into the ocean for a guy who petted them once energy
legend has it carmen still manages to throw el topo and le chevre in the water every time they are within a mile of it
i love le chevre backing up and running away from her because he's like oh shit. wasn't she like the best in our class?? is she going to kill me or something?? why did she leave VILE what the fuck im booking it nah
YEAH I NEED THE ROPE CARMEN IS SO MEAN IN THIS EPISODE ITS SO FUCKING FUNNY
IVY RESPONDING TO THE ASK FOR "MUSCLES" WAS A UNIVERSAL LESBIAN WIN FOR EVERY SINGLE PERSON ON THE PLANET GOD WHAT AN ICONIC SCENE. MILADY. ALL SHE HAD TO DO WAS KISS HER HAND GOD
its never brought up ever again that ivy's "shirt" is actually a blue undershirt and a black vest and that is criminal we needed a gay vest. something
the slomo kick is so hot
LE CHEVRE STEPPING ON HER HEAD
those plates must have hurt so fucking bad
okay well. you DO commit crimes
"the police have no idea they exist" okay. TELL THEM
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SEE? VEST.
"got any room for us on your next job?" "you know what? sure! come along and help me take down this global criminal organization. uhhh what are your names again btw?"
yall i dont think eddie is going to want to see you for the money
A FLYING CAR he said yeah zack that was smart
i love how offended by literally everything the bostonians do shadowsan is
THEY MADE SHADOWSAN GET IN THE BACK BEHIND THE SEAT HAHAHAHHJHD
that hq wont be so wasted when you die of hypothermia! good luck carmen
alrighty, thats the beantown caper all done! only two more to catch up on before I'm on time again for my favorite episode this saturday >:)
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damnfandomproblems · 1 year
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not a submission this is an ask directed at all three of those first reblogs(or people in general really) on submission 3851 and im saying this on anon because ive seen the absolutely abhorrent behavior from people about this fucking game and im not risking anything. ABSOLUTELY NO ONE AND I DO MEAN NO ONE IS CHOOSING "NOSTALGIA" OVER TRANS LIVES kindly shut up. jk rowling had absolutely nothing to do with the games development and she only get royalties for the fucking ip. thats not alot. idk if i am remembering this correctly but iirc she sonly getting 2% and while yes that is something the other 98% is going to the people who fucking made the game. hell they named it "hogwarts legacy" because putting "harry potter" would only give her more money. and all the people playing the game just want to enjoy fucking being a wizard. VERY FEW people have anything against trans people and absolutely no one has any right to harass, doxx, or suibait people and streamers for even THINKING, for even CONSIDERING buying the game even if they dont stream it. You people want to bitch and moan about trans lives while actively putting others lives at risk for your "activism" OVER A FUCKING VIDEO GAME BUT I HAVE NOT HEARD ONE FUCKING THING ABOUT ANY OF THE OTHER GAMES WITH SHITTY DEVELOPERS WHO GET MORE MONEY FROM THEIR GAMES THAN JK ROWLING WILL EVER GET FROM HER IP ROYALTIES for the FUCKING funny wizard game ALL you people want is a fucking excuse to bully people and appear to be on a fucking moral high horse. the people playing the game have done NOTHING to ANY of you. ALOT of streamers even tried setting up charity stuff for their streams and people like you harassed and bullied them out of it. you people have ironically done MORE HARM to people in general over a fucking video game about wizards than jk rowling and you know what this is coming from someone who doesnt even fucking like harry potter. ive tried. my whole family loves it but i cant. and after this i cant and i wont i cant stand the fucking fake activist people in this dumb fucking wizard fandom who think its okay to harm people in the name of "trans lives" or "trans rights" over a fucking video game you make me sick. harrassment, doxxing, and suibaiting ARE SERIOUS ISSUES and they do not become "OKAY" or fucking justifiable because you think its for a "good cause" Thats not how this works and you should be ashamed of yourselves. boycott the game if you want. but no body has any right for any reason to harm others.
In my opinion, this can be boiled down to people should not be bullying and harassing over people over something.
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gaypleasantview · 1 year
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A, F, I, L , P, V and Y (lmao so many but i'm curious)
TYSMMMMM
A: Favorite CC creator
Honestly its so hard to say bc i love so many 😭 naturally im a fan of creators that create or used to create something essential and super cool like platasp, jacky93sims, moni lisa sims, skittlessims, leto mills, linacheries, pooklet and azaya, mrs mquve, riekus13, rockethorse, applewatersugar, pforest, kestrelteens, vidcunds, sammy sundog, and probably a whole bunch of other creators that i forgot... if i had to pick someone i have a special love for it would be leaf-storm because im such a huge fan of their cc 😭 and naturally i got to mention you and dirk as my beloveds that im always so excited to see new stuff from 🙏🙏
F: Gameplay with or without cheats
Well im a legacy challenge kid, thats where i came from and thats i will forever be, and those require you to abstain from cheats so i got used to making money myself and its super fun, as a kid i would always abuse rosebud and motherlode and honestly when it comes to the first one its probably justified bc playing ts1 with cheap furniture is hell 😃 but with the other games its not the same! i gotta say i started building more recently so the basic building cheats are as necessary as ever but also i think i love testingcheats so much im just gonna have this mod tattooed on me literally bc its so scary and gives you too much power but the fun of it cant be described. i used to abuse it as a kid as well
I: Your Bella Goth theories
Honestly im a bit tired of all the bella business but i accept any theories, i havent decided on one myself but i lean towards thinking bella is in strangetown but is strangetown bella The bella? idk. i also dont like that bella from psp said she married for money and i dont believe her bc her and mortimer are the only true love in the universe it feels sometimes
L: Have your sims ever cheated?
As a kid i made Chester Gieke successful and he was my favorite sim, i also grew up with a lot of christian guilt but it looks like i played chester before that happened bc once i opened his save after a few years i was completely shocked betrayed and upset when i saw that he fucked four women two of which were his robots? i love that i had fun with it as a 8 or 9 yo bc later in life i cared for sims too much to make them cheat 😭 i do wanna play as a romance sim sometime bc i never truly experienced that but i still feel bad when my sims are sad so we'll see
P: Pose or play your sims?
I may not be super good at it but i loovvee posing sims with animations, everything else mostly just looks too basic to me bc once youve seen a pose a few times youre gonna recognize it everywhere and its not as fun anymore. but i still like them regardless! i just think im mostly better off using parts posers, animations or just literal gameplay so that people wont be annoyed with my pictures (honestly tho who cares. its my game) but in general gameplay is my favorite, even though ive always been a big fan of screenshotting, esp in ts3
V: How did you start playing the sims?
When i was about 5 yo we moved into a new place and we got a computer and my sister heard from her classmates about the sims, of course we had to go to our insanely-popular-at-the-time book market that had many many ill*gal game cds lol it was really hard to get a real copy back home bc ts2 wasnt localized in my language and ts1 wasnt even published in any nearby countries at all i think so people had to localize it themselves. we found a stand that had every ts1 expansion on display and we couldnt pick between makin magic and superstar i think. but superstar had xtina on the cover so of course we picked it, turned out it was superstar and literally everything that came before it (that is everything ts1 had except making magic). so that was my first sims game and i kind of dedicated my life to my love for it ever since. i dont remember how we started playing ts2 but i remember my first time playing it
Y: Favorite career
Paranormal probably 😭 bc i loved resurrecting sims. and idk maybe culinary and science? i love ghost hunters in ts3 🙏
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dittolicous · 1 year
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i think im having my midlife crisis. cuz time is passing so fast and im just... so tired. so tired of spending everyday miserable and stressed and hoping tomorrow will be better, when it never is.
i dont want to have to struggle for another 10 years just to get a simple little home that isnt infested with roaches or has rats in the walls. i want to be able to get up in the morning to drink coffee and watch the news. see kids walking to school. learn to sew. go fishing every now and again. own a car. be able to sleep without fretting over which bill to pay before cutoff.
i. i dont feel like ill ever escape. the community around me doesn't care because im not homeless of suffering enough, because i can still work even if im a husk of a human. because everyone has to work or die. work or die.
ive spent thr last few days pouring over applications, loan possibilities, houses, financial aid, bills, etc. no jobs have reached back to me except scams or ones that are basically downgrades from what i already do. i look and i look and i look, i used that suggested google jobs thing, but all the good jobs are off the island, require 10000 years experience, have no benefits, or are all work that i utterly despise. i dont qualify for loans and make too much for financial aid.
and they always say the same thing. get rid of your pets (as if rehoming is even cheap or easy), get rid of internet, make sacrifises sacrifices and more sacrifices. get up at 4am to wait in food bank lines for old meat, leftover produce, and stale cake. constantly plead to strangers and justify your life. because thats just life! your not allowed to have nice things when youre poor, dont you know? if you do, then thats wasting money and we wont help you. you deserve what you get because happiness comes with money.
i just want out. and i guess jokes on them. if i rehome my pets, well, that would mean id finally be free to off myself. because im sorry to say, but theyre the only thing that holds me back. i hate this world. i wasnt built to survive here. i dont have any passions or drive or... anything.
i dont know why im here. just to suffer and be miserable until im too old and weak to work, to die alibe in a ditch.... i dont have anything worth anything.
and what makes me fucking laugh! is that the last time i went to my psych appointment i was like. i cant do this! im tired of being tired! and they pushed me to try their therapy again and that theyd get a case worker to call me and to think of all things i can change instead of what i cant... i agreed but was open with how i didn't have much faith in the system. how they failed me in the past and that makes me wary.
that was two weeks ago.
case worker never called me. therapist never called me. i cant change anything.
all because of stupid fucking bills and checks and jobs and money because no one deserves to live happy!
ill never escape. ill never have a live worth living. i dont have anyone to go to the movies or amusement parks with, no one who would drop by for coffee and a chat, no one to go to cons with. im just a little icon on a blue website. if i died tomorrow, if my queue ended... no one would mourn me not really. no one would cry. because im just broken and incapable of making genuine connections. id just be another quiet blog, a blip in the radar.
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robotapologist · 1 year
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I dont think i like totks plot.
Zeldas sacrifice is touching and a good place to go with her character. I just wish the rest of the games plot was as good as that
Botw was about failure and sacrifice and love and finding small joys in the wasteland and protecting quiet mundane life
And totk just doesnt really live up to its themes. Themes being: community. A good theme i really want to enjoy and in same ways there are parts where its done well- but the flashbacks with Rawrrawr, Sonia, and Ganandorf are very disappointing
I dont know what any of them really believe in. I dont know what makes Rawr guy a good king. I dont know how he interfaces with his kingdom. I dont know how sonia interfaces with her kingdom.
Like the theme of sacrifce being imparted onto zelda was good but???? Community should have also been imparted onto Zelda too. Or maybe in reverse, community imparted from Zelda to Rwarwu. She is a good ruler, she is willing to get into the dirt and rebuild hyrule with her own two hands. She has a relationship with the common people of hyrule. She wants alliances with people. In contrast Rawr just kind of seems like an asshole. Gannondorf may be evil but i cant help but feel having a guy kneel to you and swear loyalty is bad for relations.
He is a bad guy, i do doubt there was anything Rrrrrrr could have done to pacify him peacefully, but thats where ganons role as a villain / dark reflection / foil comes in. Show him being a bad leader. Show him rejecting and devaluing his community. Show him refusing to make sacrifices on behalf of his people, show him demanding them to make sacrifices in HIS stead. He had an army of gerudo standing behind him in one flashback and it was like the writers just forgot about them. The next army he gets are the monsters, gerudo are no where in sight. What happened there? Where did they go? Did they reject him? Why? When? Or did he reject them? How did they feel about this?
When i look at the plot i see a bunch of really cool building blocks that could have been used to tell a compelling narrative about kindness, community, team work, vs the inherent self destruction of cruelty and arrogance. Instead, the memories just sort of seem like building up to zeldas sacrifice. They could have done all those things together if they wanted. They had the time and money.
I got excited for ganon thinking i would get literally any context for his motivations. Windwaker ganon was based and basically in the right. I dont know why that was a one off. I think they need to retire him as a villain if im being honest. But if theyre going to keep him around the least they could do is let him be a character with thoughts and beliefs and values. The scene in windwaker where ganon spares links life because hes only insterested in the triforce, gives him a lot of layers in very little dialogue. You know. Efficient storytelling.
Gannon is my favorite villain. Or i thought so. I had played zelda titles before windwaker, but windwaker had really stuck with me. I think i just liked windwaker ganon. He was a bad guy, absolutely justified in rage against the gods. He cared for gerudo people and their suffering. He was willing to spare links life because doing so was senseless and pointless [until everything became pointless to him]. He had his own character arc. I actually hated that bastard Daphnes got in his way. Like the gods he destroyed the rest of the kingdom rather than allow it to fall into the hands of someone else. Making me feral. Let ganon have depth.
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kilople · 2 years
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Manhunt 2 uk ban
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#Manhunt 2 uk ban tv
""As a thread grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches one." I really dont understand the deal with that, but if its violence you (as a nation) get off on then be my guests, though it is kinda creepy
#Manhunt 2 uk ban tv
theres violent tv shows for all ages, from cartoon network stuff to god knows what kind of late-night decapitation highlight reels. but then, with violence, its a whole different story. everything that could possibly relate to sexuality is also blurred without a second thought, because dear god we cant have our children watching naked skin. the perfect example is tv: swear gods are filtered, even the mouth of the person whos saying it is blurred. The united states is hypocritical to the point of being absurd. Then name a first-world country where something bad would happen to you if you said that. I live in the United States, and I can go on any forum I want and sayĪnd nothing bad is going to happen to me. if you think it's anywhere close to being the worst first-world country as far as censorship goes, you're way off-target. Im all for freedom of speech, but i wouldnt mind if some certain individuals (not from this thread though, necessarily! just some people in my life) were officially told to shut the # up every once in a while, because nothing productive comes out of them I can admire it for creativity as an art, but it's really just another sucky title feeding money out of the dull principle that violence sells. I oppose censorship, but I can't justify defending a game like this from my lack of interest in violence for violence's sake. I generally despise any censorship, but I will intentionally fail to defend this game from censorship. If that happened, wow would humanity ever be changed. So stay open-minded, stay informed, recognize greed in youself and avoid it, and respect others. In fact, a lot of evil in our world is created as a byproduct of those failings. The real enemies of good are not the nanoscopically small portion of evil people, but rather ignorant apathy and corrupting greed. A few evil people are balanced by the overwhelming numbers of people who are truely good at heart. There exists a balance of good and evil in the world. But on the other hand, MOST people out there are neutral or good. Most of you little pretenders who say you are desensitized or some crap like that would probably be puking your guts out. If I could show you some of the evidence left from real criminal murders and brutal rapes I've seen from a friend of mine who works with the real NYPD CSI. Pff, Manhunt is creative, but on the gore factor. It's going to be a long, long time before the US ever tells adults that they cannot play a video game no matter what.Įdit: Richard Cheney, dear forum censors. If I wrote it on a sign I might be detained for a day or something, I dunno how that works, but I'm not going to disappear (unless I look Arab in which case I get to find out what Guantanamo's like). I could probably show up outside the White House screaming it and they'd just send a security guard to shoo me away. If I were able to kill George Bush, # Cheney, and the Supreme Court in an explosion, Pelosi would become president and be able to appoint a whole new Supreme Court and that would be awesomeĪnd nothing bad is going to happen to me. I live in the United States, and I can go on any forum I want and say Their being able to control what games you play, in the privacy of your own home, is more Orwellian than it is Libertarian.Īnd DiscoZombie, the US has more flaws than anyone can list, but if you think it's anywhere close to being the worst first-world country as far as censorship goes, you're way off-target. The whole point of Libertarianism is that the government stays out of your life as much as possible. If you're a Libertarian then I'm a fundamentalist Christian. I remember the first Manhunt had some really disturbing death animations you could pull off and I didn't really enjoy the way the gore was presented. QUOTE(Omegaman Jun 19 2007, 06:25 PM) 1634689Īcutally, despite my Libertarian self, I don't find myself too offended or opposed to this.
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dyketubbo · 3 years
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im rewatching doomsday (comps of all povs of course) and. yeah i just.. feel bad for the lmanburgians. i dont know how i could just. say these people deserved it, when they all sound, panicked and desperate and so so fucking sad. long long ramble under the cut as i recount the events and pick out a bunch of little things
even the day before then is painful. ranboos panic room. ranboo and tubbos talk (tubbo admitting that hes wrong, saying he believes that history is repeating itself and trusting ranboo because he believes in his loyalty), fundy showing the ring toss. tubbos surprise at being told to kill dream before stating that quackity would be in control if he didnt (god, did he plan to fail?). tommy being so so excited. everyone playing ring toss and cheering on jack. tommy still believing in tubbo. tubbo panicking. ranboo and tommy and techno talking, ranboo giving them info. dream placing walls and quackity instructing tubbo on where to kill dream. dream lying about the community house. the entire community house debacle. just, everything.
and then doomsday itself. having to frantically get there because it started early, tubbo only having diamond armor to protect him, fundy standing still after he sabotaged them. tubbo and ranboos genuine despair about the apiary.
tubbo eventually going nonverbal and actively putting himself in danger, not even moving away from techno at first and getting in the way of the firework launcher. tubbo trying to save tommy from the fireworks, ponks broken "dont come over here!" after she was trying to save his cat, tommys face falling and desperate attempts at convincing techno, ranboo going "its all gone", niki spiralling and silently burning down the tree, quackitys pure anger. all the death messages.
jack going "what is there left to protect", tommy brokenly trying to accept that its gone as tubbo and quackity blankly do accept it. jack going "i lost everything again". tommy desperately trying to understand dream, on the verge of tears as he asks why dream didnt just hurt him. his low health and food as hes unable to do anything anymore, his quiet gasp as he spots ghostbur, tubbos tiny shake of his head when dream says dream and tommys story wont be over.
tubbo and quackity breaking the repeaters. ghostburs "i didnt even know we were fighting". ghostbur finding out phil let friend die, hes pained "phil? but i- i gave, i gave phil to look after. and dream found me friend, and technoblade said we were friends", tommys pained talk about technoblade. "we were never his friend. to him, all of this was just an act of politics, an act of clout and a-a social ladder, and you won't remember. tubbo you will, and to you big q, this was a friendship. but to technoblade, this was a ladder. and techno climbed to the tippity talk. do you wanna know the only way you can go? on the ladder? -- and once you reach the top of the ladder tubbo, you can only go down."
quackity asking to sing the anthem again, him strumming as ghostbur sings (and tubbo and tommy joining in). ghostbur forgetting the second verse because it blew up. quackity remembering it, them stumbling through it. tommys "tubbo? im so so sorry", tubbos quiet "its okay." the four all singing together. tubbo looking at the lava with an ender pearl in his hand, tommy correcting quackity and going "our l'manburg". ghostburs speech about friend, about people not taking him seriously just because he has memory loss.
meanwhile.. phil and techno were laughing. cracking jokes. phil mocks them as he spawns withers on the apiary, going "ohhh noo not the bees!". techno shouts at tommy and shoots at him and tubbo. he kills jack and doesnt even notice that it was one of his lives lost. jacks death itself proves that it doesnt take any particular intent, doesnt have to mean anything to the killer. techno and phil were willing to kill people. it would be foolish of them to act as if there were no risks in the terms of canon lives, especially with phil. phil doesnt take ghostbur seriously, treats his despair as an opportunity to drill in a lesson. the most either of them lost was some of the dogs and used up potions, fireworks, and wither skulls
and then theres dream. dream whose been harming the l'manburgians since the beginning, who had taken tubbo hostage, offered eret a chance to betray them all, who had been the man in tommys walls and offering money to tubbo and jack to try and get them to destroy things, who tried to get tommy to kill tubbos villagers. dream, who took tommys discs over and over, who killed tommy twice in one day, who stopped caring about his friends that loved him and were so so loyal. dream, who helped schlatt and pushed wilbur deeper into his spiral, who even then tried to manipulate tommy.
dream, who helped destroy l'manburg the first and second time, who took advantage of tubbo so he could have a premeditated kidnapping of tommy. dream, who abused tommy, physically, psychologically, emotionally. dream, who degraded tubbo and had taken ranboos memory book (which btw, since ranboos memory loss counts as a mental disability with the memory book as his aid, thats dream taking the thing that aids ranboo in dealing with his disability).
dream, who had been the reason l'manburg was created. dream, who got to destroy l'manburg three times. dream won. and techno and phil dont regret it, dont care.
maybe l'manburg was never meant to be. and sure, it started with stealing and an attempt to monopolize on potions but. that wasnt even l'manburg then, was it? it was just wilbur and tommy having fun. l'manburg came after. after the police hurt them. l'manburg started as a silly little revolution, led by a naïve man who thought he could win wars by saying no. it was a place for a family, a place for them to escape from dream. it was a place to try and escape the harm of those outside the walls. it was meant to be safe, even if those against them made it hard to be. it was made from love. it was meant to be happy. it was a symphony, however unfinished.
so. i don't know. i just feel, bad. they never really won, did they? tragedy after tragedy, death after death, destruction after destruction, betrayal after betrayal, hurt after hurt. and now what's left of them, really? out of the founders, erets doing the best and even shes doing awful, forever trying to make up for what he did. tubbos paranoia led him to developing nukes in a desperate attempt to stay safe, because he was taught to stay quiet and keep his emotions to himself, because his death was "justified", because nukes and walls and weapons are the only way he can feel safe anymore.
tommy went through months of abuse, lost all of his lives and suffered upon coming back, suicidal but unable to bring himself to do it because limbo is worse, feeling lost and like he has no family anymore other than wilbur, who he knows is hurting him but cant bring himself to leave, who loved lmanburg so so dearly and only wanted a home, still doesnt have one (tommy from everywhere, tommy from nowhere at all). niki who loved lmanburg and wilbur so much that it hollowed her out and made her bitter and shes so used to being spoken over that all she can think to do is raise her voice and get pissed, who cant see wilbur as a good person anymore because shes hurt and hasnt truly recovered and she doesnt know how to cope without being angry.
jack manifold feels forgotten, hes lost all his lives and crawled out of hell and no one truly noticed, he doesnt even believe that niki really cares, hes desperate and has made his purpose to be spiteful and angry because he cant deal with the emptiness that comes when he realizes theres no point. fundys desperate to have friends, family, a partner, anyone thatll love him, anyone thatll keep him safe, slowly killing himself with cigarettes and disowned because of giving too little too late, because he was too little too late.
and wilburs lost himself. spiraling, paranoid. a young, naïve man who wanted to fight swords with words, who wanted to impress his father, who wanted a nation of his own to feel safe, who was so effected by erets betrayal that he cant trust anyone but himself, whose possessive nature eats him from the inside out, desperate for control and unable to let go of the only person he knows loves him unconditionally
all because outside forces kept pushing, kept destroying, kept ruining them and hurting them and traumatizing them and taking away their homes and pets and loved ones. and i just. cant feel happy for the ones that hurt them, i cant feel victorius, triumphant, any of that. i just feel bad that the l'manburgians never got to be a family. i know they arent the best people but shit, i love them anyways, love them because theyre flawed and because theyre *people*, people who tried so so hard and got pushed so so much and. fuck, i cant be happy that the people who loved nature and play fought and laughed by campfires and read poetry and re-enacted theatre and loved each other and wanted to *live* (even if they were willing to die, if it meant giving everyone else a chance).. lost. they lost.
canonical years of work down the drain in one day. records of history gone, now only remembered in full by a traumatized teenager who was taught not to talk about his negative emotions, and even he misremembers some parts. they didnt even lose fairly. they had no chance. they couldnt have prepared for withers, for tnt rain, for the hounds. they were poor, weaker than their opponents, sabotaged by one of their own. thats.. tragic.
doomsday was a tragedy. i cant agree that it was deserved. i cant agree that they had it coming, that they deserved to lose homes and pets and limbs and lives and land because they werent the greatest people around.
a small country of less than 10 people (at both creation and destruction) now a giant crater in the ground, remnants of a parisitic egg taking over the land. and it wasnt even lost fairly. three people were stronger than an entire nation, even with all of its allies. two anarchists working with an abusive tyrant. so, no. doomsday wasnt deserved. people dont deserve tragedy. there were better ways, i truly cant be happy that the way chosen was violence. i cant.
l'manburg's citizens deserved better. they really did. the ends dont justify the means. and god, am i fucking tired of "justice". if justice means choosing violence over love and respect and caring about those less strong than you, i dont wanna hear about it. fuck that man, id rather love and be loved than constantly give a shit about making up for hurting others by getting hurt, thats stupid and cruel and i cant see it as okay on a moral level. not when the people that got hurt deserved to be loved and cared about and protected and *talked to* instead of constantly shot down.
of course for the narrative i can enjoy violence and characters getting hurt and i do like how "real" it all is, the despair and dissonance in tone and how terrifyingly messy it all is. out of story perspective- honestly rather cool even if it makes me feel bad. in story perspective- holy fucking shit no that wasnt deserved and god i hope everyone hurt will be able to heal and learn to love and be loved again because thats such a terrifying thing to go through. from a detached pov i can appreciate the insight into everyone involved and i like the plotlines that came from it, but from a compassionate pov i just wish the l'manburgians were allowed to be happy and treated as equals so they didnt have to go through all of this
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zaptap · 3 years
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ive made a few of these bingo sheets and theyre fun so i decided to make one not just for e3 but also JUST for splatoon 3 (not just for e3 but for like the whole lifetime of the game). also heres my updated list of characters id like to see in smash, ordered generally by which id like more and/or think are the most realistic
since min min got in i took out helix, and since i couldnt decide whether to add in waluigi or madeline i added another row (realistically i dont think any indies are getting in but i threw some in anyway). also i was like “oh yeah maybe theyd put in a gen viii pokemon” so i threw in hatterene since thats one of my favorites.
also as for waluigi (and shovel knight for that matter) i think it would be nice to see an assist trophy get in just to break that rule. also i remember being super surprised he wasnt in brawl (back then i thought he and wario were equally important) and even though that was based on a wrong impression ive still felt like he should be in there ever since
notes about the bingos under the cut
really is about time for those n64 games, especially now that mario is dead so theyre free to release sm64 on it. game boy games would be nice sometime too
would also make sense to include banjo-kazooie in that, nintendos had a good relationship with microsoft lately and the total absence of anything banjo-kazooie on the switch is odd since it’s a dlc character (every other one has a game on switch they can use for cross-marketing, even if joker’s took a while) and i think the best explanation for that would be that theyre holding off for the nso n64 app (this is easiest from a technical standpoint because all they have to do is make a deal to use the roms)
when are they putting octolings in mk8d
xenoblade chronicles x is one of the only wii u games left that they could port (aside from ones that wouldnt make much sense like splatoon and ssb4) so i guess that might as well happen sometime. also monolith soft might be doing something else besides helping with splatoon 3
im not ready for metroid prime 4 (im over halfway through mp2 and therefore the trilogy as a whole) but it’s been a while, they might show it and it could even come out this year
hal apparently recently hinted at a new kirby game or something
the upgraded switch is obviously going to be called the Nintendo Switch ͥ  since they already did the ds lite so theyre clearly naming everything in the family after the ds family, theres absolutely no flaw in this logic. idk if theyre showing it, but unlike 2019 they didnt say they werent showing new hardware (just that they were showing software, which could be taken as denying rumors, but they sometimes specify when certain things arent being shown)
metroid prime trilogy also might come this year. would make sense to release it before mp4 since not everyone is going to buy a wii u to get it (and at this point that doesnt get nintendo any money since they stopped making them)
where is detective pikachu 2. i hope it has the blue pikachu from that first tease they gave us in like 2014 (2013? that was a loooong time ago idk)
they said this was MOSTLY 2021 so i am absolutely getting my hopes up for splatoon 2
the two sinnoh games could likely be there
would be super cool if oddity came to switch. and almost as ironic as megalovania getting into smash
we havent seen the botw sequel for a couple years so we’re kind of due for an update on that
it’s ace attorney’s 20th anniversary this year so maybe theyre doing something. theyre already porting those games though so idk. maybe he’s getting in smash
whats with that watermelon mario render
i held off on watching a playthrough for ndrv3 on the off chance it came to switch and i could play a dangan ronpa game for real for once but it’s now been 4 years and we just passed the 10th anniversary of the series (albeit during a pandemic when i wouldnt expect them to have done anything) so it would be cool to see the series come to switch. i think if it still doesnt after this though i’ll just watch the playthrough, 4 years is long enough. amazed ive avoided spoilers this long, i still know next to nothing about the game
im about done with acnh but im still waiting on those splatoon items. and i ran out of storage in february so i need more of that too
nintendo did stuff for zelda’s 30th anniversary so i doubt theyre forgetting the 35th. maybe wwhd/tphd ports, idk
been a couple years since fire emblem, intelligent systems is probably up to something besides planning yet another paper mario spinoff
miyamoto forgot pikmin 4 in the oven 6 years ago and it got burnt to a crisp and thats why it hasnt come out yet because he had to start over
and splatoon
the inklings scared daft punk into quitting so now that theres no competition in the robot musician scene they should have a daft punk style group
i waited and waited and neither of my top two splatoon stages (flounder and d’alfonsino) came back in splatoon 2 so i hope just because splatoon 3 isnt in inkopolis doesnt mean they still wont return
would be sick as hell if there was a real hide and seek mode instead of just sticking to your own rules in private battles. havent played that since 2015 but it was super fun
show us the effects of the chaos world
i wanted mc craig to have a song in octo expansion and they didnt deliver. heres another chance
splatnet 3 baby
cant wait for nogami to do a funny 3 pose
abxy came back for splatoon 2.... am i gonna be that lucky again...?
salmon run doesnt make sense if youre friends with a smallfry but they could either change the story context (you just fight “evil” salmonids?) or replace it with an equally fun co-op mode
amiibo!!! i think i said this before but they should label them by weapons if these cephalopods dont have genders, would make more sense (the gendered ones had different weapons anyway)
returning characters!!!! would like to see everyone have a role of some kind
maybe #GearForAll wasnt successful in getting the emperor/spy/mecha gear, but perhaps theyll at least consider not making that stuff exclusive this time around
squid girl gear should be back. and they should call it a dress instead of a tunic because its a dress. and theres no gender now anyway
as ive said before... TRIPLIES!! you hold one in each hand and another in your mouth. and you can spin around like the tasmanian devil
remove splatfest tee annoyances: you should have a prompt at the end of a splatfest to pay to scrub your tee (to make sure you get the chunks) also it should be on a neutral brand so you dont end up with an overabundance of ink resistance up (or whatever else)
better online and cloud saves would certainly justify having a second splatoon game on the same console, as much as im loving that it exists
hopefully theres a global testfire again
sooner or later the workers will rise up and kill mr grizz
remember in splatoon 1 where if you had squid beatz (via the amiibo) you could “play” it in the lobby and change the music? then you were stuck listening to only bubble bath in splatoon 2? why did they take that option away they should bring it back
looking at those apartment buildings in the trailer i think it would be cool if you had your own room and could decorate it
an octavio redemption arc would be fun to see. in the manga he stole the zapfish because the octarians had an energy crisis, and in the end they worked out a deal to share the electricity
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fagcrisis · 3 years
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1, 6, 7, 10
1. how many concerts have you been to
not sure tbh my moms been taking me to concerts since i was like, 4? she cant walk as much now so we only go to wheelchair accessible concerts together of which there arent many around but i try to go to gigs at least like once a month. heals the soul
6. what is your next concert
GOD i dont have tickets to anything rn but im hoping to see csnk in january? but like, whatever comes up yknow. ill go to any concert pretty much
7. which artists/bands would you love to see live
CSAKNEKEDKISLÁNY as i said i might see them next yr!! also bastille is coming to sziget and by GOD im broke as fuck but if i can justify the money ill go and see them
10. worst opening act youve seen
honestly most opening bands ive seen were alright? most of them didnt really stick w me, hocuspony yesterday Kinda sucked but they had a couple alright songs and they were so happy to b there i dont wanna shit on them. they have room for improvement tho
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nish-with-no-niche · 4 years
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When No One's Around...
Chartered accountant!Jaebeom x Software engineer!Reader
Summary :
Ever wonder how much alcohol tolerance can Jaebeom have for you? Read till the end to find out ;)
Warning :
1) This chapter.....is a long ass ride.
2) I know some people prefer using their name, but I only realised it later that instead of (Y/N) I accidentally gave reader-nim a name, i.e, Yeseul. So kindly bear with me as it's my first time writing a 2nd person perspective and just imagine your own name in its place. Thankyou and.....enjoy!
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You finally had finished your board meeting and were heading out of the office building with your co-workers to retire to your humble abode.
"It's 7:37 pm ladies and gentlemen, and we are finally free for the night.", said Sarah, one of your close colleagues.
"Aaaand we're leaving 2 hours later than the designated office hours. This is over time!", exclaimed Kyunghwan, your senior, and sales manager. It was totally unusual but justified for everyone to feel this way. After such a heated discussion about the proposals everyone was exhausted and acted dramatically. Even though they were your seniors, almost everybody still treated each other without the honorifics outside of work; albeit they could seem eccentric given the time and place. You yourself had experienced it first hand and maybe tonight had just a little bit more in store for you.
" Everyone, I totally understand how you must feel.....", stated Mr. Yoon-ho, the team director. "We, are not getting paid enough. Let's go to a restaurant and give ourselves a well deserved treat. The person who is wearing blue today will be the ones to pay up!", came his suggestion.
Hearing his sudden offer, each person constituting the 8 people group cheered and hooted but started checking their dress colours as the realization hit in. 'Oh thank god, I'm wearing anything but blue today' , everyone thought simultaneously.
However everyone's eyes landed on you as you were the only one wearing a turquoise blue ruffle shirt with beige coloured cigarette pants. And everybody knew exactly where that suggestion in the director's mind had come up.
' Oh lord, it's Yeseul again.'
Firstly, Yoon-ho was a huge-ass spend-thrift. Even if he knows he wont eat or use something, he would still spend money on it. Especially when it's someone else's money.
And secondly, he despised you. You and your intelligence. And the fact that you were humble made it even worse for him.
Atleast one can hate on arrogant people for their arrogance. As for humble people, we can't even hate them for anything, much less like. Tch.
Sarah, concerned for you asked if you were okay with that. Not that you really had a choice in the first place.
But you had stopped listening-in to their conversation, midway. Because your eyes were solely fixated on this unexpected visitor, standing right across the road, leaning against his car and looking right at you.
Im Jaebeom, your soon-to-be fiancè, in all his glory was right in front of you and you had no idea what he was doing there.
"Sarah, I'll see you later."
Coming to your senses after 3.57 seconds, you waved back at him and quickly crossed the road to reach him.
" Yeseul, hey" started Jaebeom.
"Uh, hi! I didn't know you were here. How have you been?", unsure, you asked him.
"I've been good. I got off work early today so I decided to pick you up like a responsible boyfriend", smirked Jaebeom.
He had his hands in his pant pockets the whole time, was wearing a suit with his hair gelled up and looked like the epitome of a perfectly successful banker.
"How long had you been waiting?", you questioned. "Not too long, about 20 minutes? .... Yeah. Don't worry though, I was busy on my phone." He lied. He knew you'd feel even worse about the truth because in reality he had been waiting for you since two hours thirty-seven minutes and sixteen seconds.
But even then you insisted, " Now this makes me look really bad. You didn't have to come all the way here. Why didn't you call me?"
"I wanted to be here", he replied cheekily and pat your head. "And it was a good surprise, wasn't it?"
(Sighing) "what if I already went home or I was staying in late?"
"Well then lets just say I got lucky" he smiled.
You were about to say something further, but he cut you in, " By the way, your...... colleagues, they seem... expectant?" Looking back at them you see them all wide-eyed and smiley-faces as if they just didn't come out of an exhausting office day. Realizing their expressions , you turned and asked Jaebeom, " oh, um, Jaebeom-shi, you're not too tired, right? Have you eaten something?"
"No, not really, why?"
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" HA, HA, HA, HA, HA! WHAT A NIGHT MAN, WHOO!!" roared a drunk Mr. Yoon. "Wow, Yeseul, you have such a nice boyfriend, he's a keeper, hahahaha. Everyone! say, 'THANKYOU IM JAEBEOM-SSI!'.
Bashfully, everyone complied, giving you sorry smiles and yet enjoying the food and drinks in front of them as if it was their first time eating.
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Since the time the talks of you about to being engaged rounded up in the halls of your office, everybody had been eager and curious to meet this Mr. Perfect who they had only seen in photos. Everyday not only the women but also your male coworkers would come over at your desk asking you to set up a get together with him.
They all wanted to know who this mysterious person was, taking a liking for someone as stoic as you. They never imagined you being in a relationship with anyone- always holding the title of 'Fashion Femme Fatale'.
So now here you were- with Jaebeom- and a gang of 8 people who were doing nothing but wasting Jaebeom's hard earned money.
Yes, he offered to pay up in your stead.
Ah! So chic!
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You were getting really uncomfortable because you felt bad for Jaebeom who was nothing but sweet to everyone all this time. You were barely starting off in a relationship and now he had to witness all of ....... this.
You wanted to just take your bag and run away with him.
"Hmm, Yeseul , how long has it been since you guys started dating?" Asked Yoon-ho.
Huh?
" uh, it's been about...... 2 months?" you replied looking at Jaebeom for confirmation. After getting his nod of approval you continued, "why do you ask though, sunbae-nim?"
"Ah! I didn't get to congratulate you. First of all....... let me pour you a drink!"
"What, out of nowhere?"you retaliated.
"Ahem! I'm your superior."he countered. "You didn't even touch anything yet, Drink~ bottoms up~~".
In the midst of his coercions, you contemplated- 'Why... do I get intimidated by Yoon-ho ssi? .... Soju's too strong ...... Jaebeom won't be able to drive if he drinks it.... house is far tooo. *sighs* it's over for me if I get drunk and act like an idiot in front of them.... hhnnngg. But if I refuse, the mood will get cold.... last time I was fine for the first few drinks, right?-"
"Give it to me."interceded Jaebeom.
"Huh?"
Turning towards the crowd, he stated, "Yeseul's bad with alcohol. I'll drink for her."
"Ooo~ hahahaha~~"
"playing the knight for your girlfriend ? ~~ "
"so cool!! Whoa~"
Sighing you looked at him, starting to get a little worried. But suddenly everyone chimed in- "still! We're not satisfied with one drink!"
"Let's get Yeseul-ah drunk~!"
"Me too!"
"You cant resist our drink! We're your superiors!"
"Aah~ now, let's not push her too hard. Take it slow. Slow~" said Yoon-ho, giving you his ever so sweet smile.
'It is you I hate the most!' You thought.
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"Aah~ Jaebeom-ssi drank them all"
"~Food is great here!"
"Heard this is the hidden place for gourmets."
After a while things seemed to settle down, your thoughts again wandered towards Jaebeom-
'He keeps on tapping his fingers and feet.... all the while maintaining his smile. I wonder if he's getting bothered by them..... ' -
"Hey~ she cant take her eyes off her BOYFRIEND!" chirped Yujin( colleague, same age as you). Following suit everyone got started off- "He's good looking right?" " you didn't even glance at the others ~" "what ? No, when did I.. " you tried to defend yourself. Sarah who was sitting next to you all this time whispered, "don't take them too seriously 'seul- ah, they're only teasing you, and you know everyone is as good as drunk."
Suddenly Kyunghwan, who was sitting opposite to you, waiting for the right opportunity slipped in~ " You can take mild Brandy right?"
"Ah yes, I can"
"NO." Jaebeom interceded. Again.
He took the glass from his hand and drank it.
"Aish intercepting it all, gosh!"he exclaimed.
But leaving no stone unturned, he kept pressing, "hey! You guys are a couple, atleast show us a kiss!" And everyone started hooted demanding such a public display of affection.
Hearing this, your ears flared up, " oof, what's with you all? Dont you think it's too much? ..... please stop it already. I dont really want to do it. ........Why do we have to do it in front of you?"
Now this... was just too much. Right when you were about to give them a piece of your mind-
"Okay."Jaebeom announced.
" ...... "
" ....... "
" ....... "
What.
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The truth is that both of you had never really kissed before, the closest form of affection you were able to showcase for now was simply a hug, that too only when you were alone. You had no idea what went through his mind when he agreed to everyone's plea. Was he finally drunk? You had never seen him drunk before, all though a few of his friends that you had met told you he had a strong temperance. Maybe this was okay for him?.... Did he probably hear it wrong? Not being able to make head or tail of the situation you questioned him, "Jaebeom-"
"You....... and you." Cutting you off, said person pointed at Kyunghwan and then at Yujin.
"If you two do it, we'll do it too. In fact, it doesn't matter if any other two do it either." explained Jaebeom with a smile.
And then you realised what he was actually doing.
"Don't want to, right?..... I stink of alcohol and 'seul said she doesn't want it. Moreover, it won't look good, if a lady's colleagues at work would act like this, much less her seniors."
"Uh. . . . " a flustered Yujin tried to speak.
" Well I wasn't going to force her to do that" resigned Kyunghwan with a pout.
"Yeah let's just forget about it, okay guys? ", Sarah spoke.
"Wow~ get married already Yeseul, reqally" Said Yoon-ho.
"Such a perfect couple. Tch" mumbled Yujin.
However, when everyone went back to their own, Kyunghwan caught Jaebeom giving him a side glance with a poker face who then turned to look at you. Even though such a gesture unnerved him, the alcohol immediately brushed off that feeling.
You on the other hand were getting more and more worried about Jaebeom, you lost count of how many glasses he must've had on your account, and tried one more time to check up on him- " are you alright? You've been really drinking a lot." But he only gave you a smile in return.
(Sighing) 'He drank way too mu-' *plop*
His head suddenly on your shoulder now, he spoke, " I want to rest."
Looking at you Sarah whispered," He must be tired, you should go home now, don't worry, I'll take care of it here."
"Okay. Jaebeom-ssi ....... Jaebeom? Let's go home now, ok?" You asked.
"Seul."
"Yes?"
"My head aches."
"What? Headache?"
"Its too noisy here..... my head aches.....". Alarmed by this sight you wondered ' 'why's he like this ? Since the start he seemed a bit off. Is his head hurting from being drunk? This was such a bad idea."
You see him gently lift his head up and stare at his hands. Or the table. Or the plate? You see jaebeom blink.
"..."
And he blinked again.
'Ohmygod,he's definitely drunk.'
" uhh, hey- let's go get some fresh air, okay?" You asked holding him by the shoulders. You never witnessed something like this before. But he just stared at you.
'Answer me already.' You thought. Helping him stand up you took your bag, "okay, Sarah, we'll be leaving now, I'll catch you tomorrow, take care!"
"Yeah, you too, goodnight~" returned Sarah.
Once outside you tried to remember where the car was, since the restaurant didn't have a parking lot. You walked a few meters and then stopped. Due to him leaning on you, your back and neck hurt a little, so you decided to sit on the nearby bench. 'Ah, I'm out of strength.'
You both just sat next to each other like that for a while and then you asked him where the car was kept.
But he just smiled at you.
Heaving a sigh, you stood up and started searching around. "Just sit here, and dont move Jaebeom- ssi, I'll be right back." He saw your retreating figure as you left.
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After about 10 min you find the car at the backside of the building and return to where Jaebeon was.
"I found the car, give me the keys and I'll drop you off home" you said.
"Yeseul."
"Yes?"
He smiled. Again.
"Seems like you won't get up for a while." So you sat down. Did he even listen to a word you said? And no sooner than you did, he reached his hand out to touch your face, whereas you instinctively moved back. He paused for a moment, mid air, and then touched your cheek. "You look tired", he said thoughtfully.
Well he wasn't completely wrong.
He let his head drop on your shoulder, and again with the same sweet, mellow voice recited you name," Ye.seul.ah."
"Yes, yes I hear you." You laughed.
"I should've just left with you after work was over rather than come here. Everyone just wanted to meet you so bad. I'm sorry."
" . . . "
"Plus I didn't want you to pay for those guys." You confessed.
"Pay?", queried Jaebeom. "seeing how they sat and behaved with you , it's obvious that they were trying to leech off." He finally spoke.
" Yeseul, I want you to be very cautious and smart about who you associate yourself with in that work place and any where else. I won't always be around you, so you must be wary of people like Kyunghwan. Got it?" And then he lifted his head up to stare straight ahead.
So that's what was bothering him.
Trying to lift the strange tense atmosphere you spoke in childish wonder, "how dare they think of you as a pushover! In fact, why did you even drink whatever came my way, I could've handled-"
"What would you have done?" Cut in Jabeom.
You fell silent.
"Those two men and that woman, those three were your seniors. And anyone could notice how they exploited their position. I understood you couldn't do much from where you stand", he reprimanded you.
After a pause he continued, now in a smaller voice- "I dont think I can drive, how will you get back home?"
" Well thanx to a certain someone, I'm completely sober. So I'll drive your car to your house and drop you off. Then I'll take a cab to mine."
" 'seul?"
"Hmm?"
"You like me right?"
"Huh", you sat up straight, taken off guard by his question.
"You're sincere to me right? Whatever I do, I have always been sincere towards you."
Suddenly flustered by this uncharacteristic side of him you just tried to avoid his question, staring straight ahead.
"Just give me the car keys, let's go home now..." you said in a daze.
'Its definitely the alcohol in his brain.'
"Yeseul!"
"Ah, yes-"
chu!~~
"Wha..."
Chu!~~~
Jaebeom kissed you.
And the realization hit in.
Huh.
Huh???!!
" #$%@&**?! Jaebeom-!!! "
" ? "
"What are you ?! Why did you?!-"
"Hm? What? No one's around."
And he kissed you again. This time properly. Making you feel nothing like ever before.
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Sadly, he ended up passing-out right after and you drove him back to his house, aided the house-helper lay him on bed, took a cab, went back to your home, changed into your night clothes, slipped in your bed and you laughed. You laughed until sleep graced you with her presence.
Except she never came.You were awake the whole night, rewinding and playing the scene again and again with the thought that would nag any other girl in your shoes- 'How do I see him after tonight! '.
Adjshklllajsldgddhddfffff !!!!!!
Eeeek!
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That's the end readers! I hope you enjoyed it my very precious people. If you did then do like and comment. Feedbacks are highly appreciated 🤧🤧
And I wish for your good health in such times and hopefully I was able to help make this quarantine maybe a little more bearable for you. Thanx for reading and dont forget- You Da Best!!!
46 notes · View notes
yyxgin · 3 years
Note
as quick as love alarm was progressing compared to other dramas i’ve seen (usually wait ten eps for the first kiss and that’s it) it still seemed,, idk important for the story? n e way.
meteor garden is insanely messy like in the final episode daoming si just mentions everything dong shancai did that makes her so amazing and i honestly forgot they even did some of their things 😳 at one point they went to london and filmed in china town and i was just like ‘oh. i know that place’ and didn’t clock after that 😭
I GOT PEN ON THE BACK OF IT IM SO MAD AT MYSELF ✋✋✋✋✋ but come find me anyway lmao i got a changbin & minho film strip 🤪 can’t have anything nice around here and i learned my lesson the hard way.
i went through a phase when whenever i watched english tv i was like ‘why does this make sense without subs..’ and would be like squinting at the screen until it occurred to me that it was in english.
oh bruh i remember making a bank account the second summer bc my employer was like why tf do you not have a bank account ,, yeesh people had been paying by card for meals and stuff and not cash like the year before. so i made one and then she paid me in cash bc people started paying w cash 😐😑😐😑 i waitress so even though i get anxious about other things, i’m comfortable about waitressing so i am super nice to everyone. i am the designated person who orders for everyone (as long as you point at what you want in case i can’t remember everything i will say it). i know how important it is to be articulated to your server bc if they f up you get mad and they get mad bc ur mad and the chef gets mad bc the server f-ed up and the chef has to cook again and it’s a never ending circle of wishing you’d just gone somewhere else and i hate that. i also get mad at my fam when we go out bc the last time we went out (literally like two years ago now bc covid) there was a guy serving at this place we’re fairly frequent at and i was like maybe he’s training don’t be so mad at him for forgetting things just gently remind him! don’t cuss him out behind his back! there’s so much pressure about not pissing off your colleagues bc there’s a groove they’ve got and you’re just there not wanting to ruin it whilst also meeting customers needs!!
ive been waiting to pass my drivers test for over a year now bc covid has pushed it back and back and back again 😐 i finally get my next test date and i have to ask a different instructor for their car bc my instructor is on annual leave when my test is scheduled. i’m holding it together so i can ask an instructor, buy a car and yeet. the bus is okay but i need my own space sometimes.
i am good w my money im the jungkook of the working class. if there are pots and pans on the go i will take them. free food? count me in. i do have that broke b*tch mindset. although i don’t buy $300 white tshirts i will spend $200 on a day out 😃 and sis,, buy whichever one you like bc of the concept!! it’s always fun seeing the posters (personally i don’t put them up bc how am i gonna have sir johnny suh STARING at me while i get changed,, no THANK YOU) i’ll cry if i ever pull a yuta card bc he looks ✨spicy✨ in all of them.
i think i get what you’re saying about gg’s! boy groups have a wider range. eg, haechan hits those high notes and jeno/mark rap/sing quite low but girl groups can’t. unfortunately i feel like they rely on visuals heavier bc they don’t have the same range bg’s do. itzy are good!! i personally haven’t listen to a lot/watched a lot of their mv’s. i’m more into red velvet for their mv’s. im terrible at watching content so i am slowly working through bts’ content, monsta x’s content and ocassionally nct’s content. im gonna work on mamamoo next 🤞fake fans unite 😔✊✨
it’s so easy to feel invisible here. don’t worry. i’m here to brighten your day! much like a sunflower ~ 🌻
I cant really speak about the importance of the kiss in love alarm since i didnt watch more than the first ep, but i will trust you if you really say so ?? 😳 I WANNA WATCH METEOR GARDEN JUST FOR THE DRAMA DHSNSK
dude dont fucking test me i WILL find your address and i WILL visit you in your sleep and steal all your kpop stuff. MINHO FILM STRIP ??????? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
i still watch english things w eng subtitles sometimes bc my first language isn't english so just in case i dont hear something i can always read it you know djsksk
this is my first job so i didnt have to have bank account before but now that i have it i feel very adult😩✋i am so old. i dont like it.
oh no i hate people that arent polite to waitresses like they are just doing their job and its so hard and stressful and i dont want to make their life harder so im just really anxious abt everything in my life ever.
i'm rooting for you on your driving test !! lets hope you make it after such a long time <3
JUNGKOOK OF THE WORKING CLASS NO- thats actually me. also free samples. give me all of them. also i think its completely justified to spend so much on a night out since its for the memories !! #yolo am i right
I AM SO TEMPTED TO ORDER THE ALBUM NOW 😭💔😭 i actually have my posters on my closet and i change inside the actual closet at all times bc me and my brother share a room, so no one's looking at me thankfully haha. well, i do have bts pics on the warderobe next to my bed as well so they watch me sleep every night but we dont talk about that. YUTA CARD i would cry. he for sure does look spicy half the time of his life.
i dont know that many rv songs (the audacity, i know) but seulgi... ah. i watched the sm new years concert and when she appeared i couldnt keep my eyes off her. i should really listen to more of their songs so if u have any recs i am all ears
thank you for brightening up my day sunflower ily mwah😔❤
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dabistits · 4 years
Note
im super conflicted abt hawks atm but i was thinking abt his parallels with shigaraki and i was wondering kinda why there's a difference between wanting 'redemption' (i dont think this is the right word but i cant think of a better one 'want better' maybe?) for shigaraki but not for hawks? is it bc he made a permanent decision to kill twice as essentially an agent of the state?
Just to preface, I don’t think I’m objectively right for just wanting Hawks to eat shit immediately in the next chapter. I’m just complaining because a lot of people who “love both Hawks and Twice” and “think Hawks was wrong, but…” are hard to get away from without going in the other direction toward a group of people who have shitty fandom behavior, whose opinions about the Hawks/Twice situation are (unfortunately) much closer to my own. I don’t think there’s necessarily a “correct” way to feel about Hawks, but I feel differently than a lot of people I see around (who, ironically, are the ones insisting that there’s a “correct” way to feel about Hawks), and that’s frustrating. I want to be done with Hawks. I don’t want him to get any more focus in canon, I don’t want to see more posts about how Hawks committing murder is an indication of inner turmoil instead of him choosing a side, I don’t want to keep running into posts that tack on “but Hawks is also sad/a victim” in discussing what’s pretty clearly a tragedy for Jin and the LOV that Hawks was completely and 100% solely responsible for.
But, yeah, sure. I’ll also explain what I think is the difference between Tomura and Hawks:
1. Part of it is emotional and not logical for sure. I love Jin a lot. He embodies the person who has faced incredible adversity, and still comes out on the other side ready to love and open his heart to others, moreover to protect others. I’m not like that at all, but I think it’s very admirable. So in that sense, it hurts on a personal level to lose him over anyone else, and I can’t not associate that with Hawks, since he’s the killer.
2. Jin is a significant death. The nameless minions that Tomura has killed (many of whom were active “Quirk supremacists”) don’t mean anything to me compared to Jin, and?? Through the lens of narrative, I think that makes Tomura more forgivable, because I genuinely have no interest in there being any plot “resolution” with, like, the dead anti-mutant cultists, because I just do not care about them.
3. Tomura, especially early Tomura, has threatened to go places that are unforgivable, like leaving All Might’s students dead and forcibly bringing Bakugou over to their side (whatever terrible procedure that may have entailed). The difference is that the narrative never actually allowed him to cross that line by actually killing the kids, who we do care about as characters, so while the intent in itself is pretty awful, he was never allowed to complete the action that would take him over to the point of no return. Hawks, however, did cross the line by killing someone who we care about and who is narratively established as a “good person,” who even Hawks concedes is a good person.
3. a. I don’t like the MLA ideologically and I don’t like the decision to have the LOV team up with them. But, again, their takeover plan has been stopped in its tracks, which I’m actually fine with to prevent the LOV from crossing the moral event horizon, but that’s, like… completely irrelevant to me thinking Hawks shouldn’t have killed Jin.
3. b. Though there’s still a chance for Tomura to cross the moral event horizon, and I’m not going to convince myself that it won’t happen. If it’s going to happen, I think it’s highly possible that it might happen in this arc, because now Jin is dead and we know how Tomura and the LOV have historically responded to their friends getting hurt. I, and many others, have called Jin the “heart” of the LOV (his name is also literally written with the kanji for “benevolence”), and now without him, there is no remaining heart nor goodwill.
4. Although both Tomura and Hawks are, on one level, fighting on behalf of the ideals that they were “raised into,” their fights happen in very different ways. The MLA arc in particular made clear that the villains are, in part, fighting for their very survival in ways heroes just aren’t. The threat that the LOV were living under was constant—when it wasn’t heroes or other villain groups, it was trying to find money and shelter and essential upkeep. Hawks may not be “free” from the HPSC or the occasional villain attack, but he’s free from those constant material struggles. He’s not an “underdog.” 
4. a. Tomura is also, in part, fighting to protect his marginalized friends. It’s for sure not on behalf of every marginalized person, but it’s certainly more than we’ve seen any pro hero fight for. The people Tomura is surrounded with are people who have never been protected nor cared for before, because they were not deemed “innocent” enough to deserve that care and protection, and Tomura continued to care for them even when it was troublesome for him to do so, when they disagreed with him, when they threatened him, and when they fucked up very, very badly. 
4. a. i. Eri is an example of a victim who the heroes fought for, but she’s an easy case to want to love and protect: Overhaul was inarguably an abuser who wanted to elevate the yakuza, she was being used in extended torture-experiment sessions, she killed her father on accident, she’s a child, she’s innocent, she’s selfless, she’s well-behaved. It’s basically not even a question whether or not she “deserves” help.
4. b. It’s people who are difficult who get overlooked. Hawks and hero society are completely unprepared to protect and care for people who don’t behave as they’re supposed to. Hawks did not care for the LOV who didn’t personally befriend him. For the one he did, when Jin didn’t cooperate the way Hawks wanted, he went for the kill. It’s either being easy and “manageable,” or die.
4. b. i. Tomura has specifically spared two people who tried to kill him or actually succeeded in killing his ally, people who he explicitly hated or did not care for. So make of that what you will, I guess.
5. From a leftist perspective, it’s just impossible not to account for the fact that Hawks helps maintain a social structure that creates so much suffering. The question isn’t really whether AFO’s teachings to Tomura are better (they’re not, and I want Tomura to break away from them), but it can’t really be ignored that Hawks is enforcing an ideal that’s wildly popular. Why this matters is that Tomura doing the wrong things will be roundly condemned, and he’ll probably be “punished” for them; but heroes are very unlikely to be punished or held accountable for committing murder, especially if it’s “justified.” 
5. a. This is problematic because it allows heroes, and the state, to define what a justified “emergency situation” is, and who can die in those emergencies. The people who are deemed killable “in an emergency” are usually those who are already marginalized; hence heroes can wait until those marginalized people get desperate enough to commit villainous acts, and then they can swoop in to arrest or kill them to widespread public acclaim.
5. b. Heroes (and law enforcement IRL) don’t address the roots of crime that lie in overarching oppressive structures like misogyny and capitalism. They don’t prevent theft by bringing people financial stability; they arrest people who were desperate enough to steal, and use those people to send a message to poor people everywhere. They make these conditions of desperation more permanent by punishing the most vulnerable people when they slip up, while doing absolutely nothing until the slip-up happens.
5. c. Heroes are punching down, and villains are punching up. That may not be the case with AFO, but I believe it with the LOV specifically, and I believe this matters because it’s exemplified between Hawks and Twice. Hawks targets someone who reached out to him, despite being hurt over and over again by types like him, who has dealt with poverty and fantasy mentally illness completely on his own, and kills him in defense of the very society that allowed all those things to happen to Jin. Hawks was given a choice: sympathize and relate to Jin, and acknowledge his well-founded grievances toward a dysfunctional society, or prioritize the safety and security of that dysfunctional society by permanently removing Jin from the equation. The choice he believes in is the choice he made.
5. d. In order for Tomura to make the same choice with the same implications, they’d have to be living in an alternate universe, in the Kingdom of AFO, where Tomura is a respected noble who infiltrates a rebel group who were going to “commit atrocities,” kills the one person who offered him a way out of AFO’s control, and possibly screws the rebels altogether, but everyone is happy that the rebels are gone. Even if you think Tomura is capable of that, it’s irrelevant because canon!BNHA has completely different power dynamics. Because Tomura’s violence will always be unpopular and persecuted, rather than justified and glorified by the state, he physically cannot replicate a choice like Hawks’. Tomura can approximate it, but even if he does, he’ll be hunted down by heroes for doing so. The circumstances and consequences for making such a choice are totally different.
So. That’s why I don’t think Tomura and Hawks can be equated. Suggesting that this is a level playing field is essentially believing that criminals and law enforcement exist on level playing fields, and they absolutely do not at all. Hawks is particularly abhorrent because he’s already followed through with his choice. He holds power by being part of the policing class, and regardless of how he came into it, he behaves exactly the same as everyone else who “freely” joined, and in his position of power he made the choice to eliminate someone who was socially powerless.
38 notes · View notes
Discord pt 98
[Date: 19/03, 06:01 AM GMT - 19/03, 06:50 AM GMT]
[CW for unethical floral experimentation, injury mention]
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kateza affectionate: “mona, don't be so hard on yourself, ok?”
Maxwell: “....i....think we should tell her about the other stuff
mona”
Little-K1ng: “............theres more????”
Marcus: “.........heh”
Little-K1ng: “uh. heh?”
Maxwell: “I saw syds observation post from yesterday...it had a scrrenshot of something I said, and jack and them told me thats what you didnt want me seeing yesterday....”
Marcus: “Oh that
....yeah”
Little-K1ng: “O_O
uh..........................................................”
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Marcus: “...that’s kind of what the argument was about”
Little-K1ng: “,,,,,,,,,,,,um
oh fuck. i
max...”
Maxwell: “im not upset”
Little-K1ng: “i just...”
Maxwell: “i took some time”
Little-K1ng: “you're... not?”
Maxwell: “and i get why you did it
yeah
but”
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kateza affectionate: “you're in an unprecedented situation. a situation that keeps getting worse and worse with seemingly no reprieve. I don't blame you for slipping up here and there- there's so much stress involved that it's almost expected for you to be upset. i don't think anyone blames you for doing these things. that's all i wanted to say.”
Maxwell: “its gotten worse
baroness has images of more times where i've slipped up
at least twice during my argument with her”
Little-K1ng: “oh christ”
Maxwell: “and then I switched back to ender for certain words....”
Little-K1ng: “i.....”
Maxwell: “and....i sent prince an ask on faer blog....”
Little-K1ng: “you... did?”
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Maxwell: “saying i was sorry for upsetting faem and i hoped i could see faem again soon”
Little-K1ng: “oh no oh no
oh max....”
Maxwell: “fae said "see you soon, page"”
Marcus: “...max signed the ask as page as well”
Maxwell: “no no
the was the second one”
Marcus: “..there was one before??”
Maxwell: “after he answered the first one i closed my eyes to breath”
Little-K1ng: “how can i be getting worse so much faster....”
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Marcus: “.....I don’t...remember”
Little-K1ng: “unless...”
Marcus: “...huh”
Little-K1ng: “oh fucking christ no non on ono nonon ono nonono.....”
Maxwell: “and when I opened them like three minutes had passed and I had sent an ask as page apparently”
Little-K1ng: “did..... did crown do something? did he get in? did he get in when i left the door open??? and make it worse???????”
Marcus: “...I don’t
...max i don’t remember you sending an ask
Only page”
Little-K1ng: “is it my fault? did... did i do that? did i really.... i..... left you vulnerable....... i....”
Tumblr media
Maxwell: “no it isnt your fault”
Little-K1ng: “i just....... this doesnt.... this doesnt hurt me nearly as much as it should.... im not... im still not upset..?”
Marcus: “Mona, Crown didn’t come in...I would’ve seen him. It’s not your fault”
kateza affectionate: “this isn't your fault mona
you're probably emotionally tired”
Little-K1ng: “but i just... i still just feel empty about it. i feel fully justified about this and i know i fucked up but im not hurt”
Raeva: “oh...”
Maxwell: “uh....I have marigold tea if you want some”
Little-K1ng: “i cant even fucking apologize right”
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Marcus: “You didn’t mess up
...max what”
kateza affectionate: “you're emotionally burnt out, Mona. This is a bad situation”
Little-K1ng: “wh. where did you get marigolds?”
Maxwell: “oH
uH”
Marcus: “max”
Little-K1ng: “....;max????”
Maxwell: “hm.....well....
Little-K1ng: “max i dont have any tea except dandelion root
you're 16 you dont have money or a car
where the fuck,????”
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Maxwell: “fetch was hurt....and i wanted to make sure I could help him tomorrow if he came back home tomorrow”
Marcus: “.....arent the flowers on your laurel...”
Maxwell: “.....”
Marcus: “max you didnt”
Little-K1ng: “mAaAaAaX??!!!!
what the HELL”
Marcus: “Don’t yell at him!”
Little-K1ng: “ahhhhh??????????????
im ??? not yelling on purpose im just????????
what the hell ??????”
Maxwell: “i wanted to help and it works?!”
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Marcus: “you tested it???”
Maxwell: “yes”
Little-K1ng: “thats such a silly idea max of course it worked??? magic is like that sometimes??? but why would you have even thought about it ?????????”
Marcus: “max”
Maxwell: “i...”
Little-K1ng: “thats so silly how did it taste wh”
Maxwell: “i knew marigolds have the ability to help heal wounds...they can help speed up the process sometimes by a couple of days”
Marcus: “Are you okay??”
Tumblr media
Maxwell: “they can help with blood flow”
Marcus: “Which ones did you cut off? Did you only cut one?”
Little-K1ng: “are you???? ok max first of all. heavy metal poisoning speedrunning. nice one. but also. dude cmon they double when you do that”
Maxwell: “and can sometimes even be used to treat infections...
i only cut one but it workss”
Little-K1ng: “one flower for how much ??”
Marcus: “...”
Little-K1ng: “like. did the water change color? bubble strangely? make fucked up ender noises at you??”
Maxwell: “i got a scrape on my arm when I was pacing outside waiting for fetch and I dipped a paper towel in it and put it on the wound”
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Little-K1ng: “god maybe i am emotionally exhausted”
Maxwell: “it almost fully closed instantly”
Marcus: “...I kinda hope it made ender noises that would be funny”
[Maxwell: “it almost fully closed instantly”]
Little-K1ng: “hUH”
Maxwell: “it healed the wound faster than normal
not completely but enough”
Little-K1ng: “oh you better hope you dont do that too much and find out once your laurel wilts the wounds just open wtf”
Marcus: “I don’t think normal marigolds do that”
Little-K1ng: “thats like. supremely fucked dude??? thats weird.”
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Maxwell: “.....”
Marcus: “...interesting”
Little-K1ng: “if you only used one did you??? just use the one i cut?”
Maxwell: “i wanted to help fetch
no the...one you cut was a bud
i needed one with petals that was bloomed...”
Marcus: “Y’know Max, I don’t think anyone else would’ve tried that”
Maxwell: “also the bud hasnt wilted despite being cut off a day ago...
but yeah i needed petals”
Marcus: “....”
Maxwell: “i tried to take em off when it was on my head but it felt like I was pulling out my hair so i stopped and just....”
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Little-K1ng: “no, i understand the need. i get it. i want to help fetch too and honestly? i would have done the same”
Maxwell: “took a whole one”
Marcus: “...are you okay?
How did that not wake me up”
Little-K1ng: “im. i just. i feel so screwed up about this whole thing.”
Maxwell: “i didnt yell”
Marcus: “...”
Maxwell: “i numbed it with ice and grabbed the scissors
fetch wasnt happy when i told him”
Little-K1ng: “well of course not”
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Maxwell: “jack saw it as an experiment”
Marcus: “...you talked to fetch?
Like directly?”
Little-K1ng: “you told him???”
Maxwell: “no he was messaging her”
Little-K1ng: “i dont even tell him when i hide a pill in some cheese for him
wait dont tell him that i said that”
Marcus: “I thought he just gave an update and that’s how you knew about stuff”
Maxwell: “to let us know he wouldnt be home tonight
yeah and i said i knew a way to help heal him”
Marcus: “...”
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Maxwell: “he...knew i was gonna do something I shouldnt have
theres still quite a bit left”
Marcus: “....i can see why he would think that”
Maxwell: “it's in a bowl....
....you can use some if you need it”
Little-K1ng: “...........ok. would it be weird. if i drank it
like a little bit
maybe itll?? pick up my mood or something”
Marcus: “What if it cures your migraines”
Maxwell: “i dont know if it works for moods”
Little-K1ng: “god i WISH”
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Maxwell: “uh give me a sec”
[Marcus: “What if it cures your migraines”]
Little-K1ng: “MARCUS IF IT DOES THAT IM GIVING YOU TWO THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE”
Maxwell: “you could try but as far as i remember it wont work
it works for wounds and inflammatory stuff”
Little-K1ng: “damn”
Marcus: “Why would you give it to me-”
Little-K1ng: “yeah ill be honest i maybe do not want the weird rat juice . at least not right now”
Maxwell: “its...flower
i put the petals in a pot and boiled em”
Little-K1ng: “Brain Flower of the Rat is not exactly the most appealing tea flavor, max. with all due respect”
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Maxwell: “then i strained them”
Marcus: “Juice of Brain Flower of the Rat then”
Maxwell: “actually tastes slightly like normal water...
if anything slightly sweet
jack said it might taste like rose water”
[Marcus: “Juice of Brain Flower of the Rat then”]
Little-K1ng: “sick new lacroix flavor”
[Maxwell: “jack said it might taste like rose water”]
Little-K1ng: “.....rose water?”
Maxwell: “yeah you boil the roses then strain em into a bowl
like i did with the marigolds”
Little-K1ng: “i like rose water... :/ guess maybe i do want the fucked up rat brain plant water”
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Maxwell: “you could try some its not like I cant make more”
Little-K1ng: “....hm !!! dont like that
do not make more rat water”
Maxwell: “....”
Little-K1ng: “i will try some but do not make more”
Marcus: “...please stop calling it rat water?”
Little-K1ng: “marcus?? do you want to try some (Patent Pending) Maxwell Ratatouille's Funky Fresh Brain Tea™️?”
Maxwell: “....
im too tired for this shit”
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Little-K1ng: “im coping max.”
Marcus: “....”
Maxwell: “ fair”
Marcus: “I don’t have any injuries?”
Maxwell: “im.....i might go to sleep soon....
who?”
Marcus: “Who?”
Little-K1ng: “we dont have injuries
basically
okay so uh?? bottoms up i guess”
sip sip
sip
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Marcus: “..oh wait
My elbow?
Does it work on old injuries?”
Little-K1ng: “uh. hm
it tastes good?”
Maxwell: “oh yeah its burned! it wont get rid of the injury but it might help with any lingering pain?”
Little-K1ng: “it tastes nice actually, the rose water thing was actually accurate
........................................huh
wtf”
kateza affectionate: “I’m gonna head to bed. Stay safe y’all. Much love /p”
Little-K1ng: “gn Kate !
uh
hm. okay”
Maxwell: “hm?”
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Marcus: “What Mona?”
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Little-K1ng: “so. i may have forgotten to mention out loud to yall but i have some pretty bad joint pain
like, typically, its a mid level pain all the time
and its jsut? less
less pain
thats nice”
Maxwell: “told ya it works!”
Little-K1ng: “it.... does !
dont make more though
ill enjoy this for as long as it lasts but for gods sake max dont pick the laurel for tea”
Marcus: “Please don’t make more rat juice max”
Little-K1ng: “gonna do a rat juice high five marcus
try it??”
Marcus: “I’ll..try just applying it to my elbow”
Little-K1ng: “something something dab joke”
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Marcus: “Man you really are tired huh?
Little-K1ng: “i am so tired
work was hard
and i came home, expecting like, the remnants of a fight”
Marcus: “Okay- oh”
Little-K1ng: “only to realize that like, just about every problem for the last 2 days are probably entirely my fault”
Marcus: “Mona”
Little-K1ng: “and i dont actually have it in me to think i actually did anything wrong and i keep getting angry and snapping at people who dont deserve it”
Marcus: “Mona it’s fine
I promise”
Little-K1ng: “<:(”
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Maxwell: “you okay marcus”
Little-K1ng: “^this is an incredibly forced frown. again, i dont feel bad”
Maxwell: “the water didnt hurt you right?”
Marcus: “Huh?
Oh
No it’s quite soothing actually”
Little-K1ng: “yeah weird right ??”
Marcus: “A bit”
Little-K1ng: “i WILL physically fight you max if you try to make more though
i will get mad. dont”
Maxwell: “....sorry”
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Little-K1ng: “i mean dont be sorry for trying it, that was a good idea
but you've done it once, thats enough”
Marcus: “Please don’t make more max”
Little-K1ng: “for safety reasons”
Marcus: “Yeah”
Little-K1ng: “i dont know how easily those stems get infected
and with how deep they run i really dont want you to find out
i already endangered you all this far, please dont help me do that
guys... you both look so tired”
Maxwell: “you wont endagenr us its fein”
Little-K1ng: “maybe you should go to bed”
Maxwell: “im fien”
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Little-K1ng: “sounds like it ,':)
head to the tulips, dormouse :)!”
Maxwell: “fuckign what”
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Maxwell: “awwwww i love emas”
Little-K1ng: “do you guys want to sleep in the living room? my bed is pretty huge”
Maxwell: “oh iv emafe a neast on the fllor”
Little-K1ng: “oh perfect, and it looks like marcus is already asleep :) thats okay!! goodnight you guys”
Maxwell: “nihgtn”
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q-u-a-c-k · 3 years
Text
im just gonna talk. I apologize for feed spam so I'll just talk under the cut
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also I'm sorry for the complete spam I hope you can ignore me well enough, but I just wanted to say that I feel content for the first time in a while. I've been doing shitty lately but too scared to really say anything about it. my brain is constantly urging me to relapse or do something stupidly insanely harmful to myself. but right now the voice is quiet and I'm allowed to think and I like thinking happy things like this. I wish there was a way to have the voices this quiet without doing it this way (unintentionally high, I think there was something in my drink that I didn't put in there). like if anyone actually reads this and knows a way to quiet the voices in my head so I can think, please let me know. I know things like taking time to take care of myself or positivity things, but when the voices are back they dont really let me do that stuff. so if anyone has a quick and effective way of getting them to be quiet please tell me.
anyways I think I already told you two, but I have the potential to be quadruple gay and I think that's pretty cool. So identity crisis time trying to explain it. Although I'm still confused about how two of the parts work together but I'm gonna try to explain it while I can think. So I'm definitely gay and I think probably pan because I honestly have no preference, a pretty person is a pretty person. I believe I'm ace or at least under that umbrella term because ew. I think I might be nonbinary but I've never really outright said I use that label. because I honestly dont know yet but I'm not comfortable with male or female and I just am who I am but dont know what that is. so I'm hoping it's okay to use at least until I figure it out? and now the confusing part, possiblity of aro???? I'm not really sure because I could have just not really found the right (or any) person yet and I dont really want to use a label just because I'm not really sure. but like thinking about romantic stuff like... it's okay?? but that doesnt really sound like my thing. like I'd like to hang out with people and know them better and do things like dates but not with a romantic intention? just to vibe with the person? idk. but it's confusing because I also said I was pan but idk what about me is oen if in possibly under aroace. like I know they're both umbrella terms, but I dont know where under them I am. or where pan fits? idk identy crisis, yay!!
I wanna do a platonic date with someone. Like we can go to the movies or something and go to a park and just get to know each other better but like platonically. I think that just sounds fun. I need to get a job so I can have money to platonically take someone on a date. I've been meaning to look for places or put in applications but I keep forgetting. Which also reminds me, I want a fuckung sword. Imagine how cool that would be!! I have the money for this nice one that I've been looking at for a while, it's a pretty white longsword with a blue gem in the hilt. I want it so bad. but my parents wont let me get it which i think is stupid. like I'm gay and have themoney, let me get my sword >:(
I want an axe, too. it doesnt necessarily have to be a pretty one because I wanna get strong and chop wood with it. I want to be a lumberjack. like not cut down trees that dont need to be cut down, but anything that has fallen already I wanna chop up with an axe then make things out of it!! I like wood working stuff. it sounds like fun. but I would need the right stuff to do that that I dont have right now. like skills.
that is making me think about another life crisis but I dont wanna think about that so I'm gonna try to think of something else like how I cant wait to move out. because they have stuff planned out for me and what they want me to do but I realized I dont wanna do that. and now I'm thinking and vaguely talking about the crisis I dont wanna think about so I'm gonna think about what I actually want to do. I wanna do the plan thing you came up with where you're gonna have your cottage in a small town and we're gonna live hopefully somewhat close to you and we can visit each other a lot and vibe. you're gonna do what you want to do and work in a museum and talk about the things you enjoy.I dont really know what I want yet but I know I wanna live near you so we can hang out and be a lot closer because you're my family and my best friend. I think I wanna have lots of plants. I want to take better care of them than I do now and. have a lot and spend time with them and make sure they're doing well and growing. I like most plants vibes. they're mostly simple but very pretty and calming and looks like what home should feel like. you feel like what home should. like sometimes when the three of us are playing games like minecraft or something and it's getting all competitive and laughing it feels like home and makes me really happy. I'm excited to leave this place and have a real home.
I wanna leave as much of this as I can behind. and since I don't plan on coming out to them soon or possibly even at all, it might actually be easier to leave. because once I do I can go by Ash everywhere and not the name they gave me. I wont have to feel sad when I have to introduce myself as the name they gave me. and as far as people would know this is my name and the only one. they wouldn't even know what the other one is and cant call me it.
I still dont know what I want, but I know just being there I'll already be happier than here. they upset me a lot here. they say rude and insensitive things and insult me whether they know they are or not. and I think one day when I leave, if they try to justify themselves instead of fixing it, I have the freedom to leave them behind. they're not as bad as a lot of other people's family, especially since I thought compared to other people my family was nice. but still I think unlike the voice says I dont deserve to feel bad about who I am, especially when they're the ones who impacted me that way and made me a lot of who I am. or caused it.
I also cant wait until I move out because I'll have a lot more control of what I can and cant do, how I can be myself, and what kinds if things I'm eating. because right now, my parents dont really buy things that are good for you because it's cheaper to get processed foods. and when they do get better things, they get things I dont like. or I never get any because my siblings have it. bht I guess in some weird way it is good that they make me feel horrible about food stuff because then that's less of the bad stuff that I eat. I don't really like eating at all and I thought that was a good thing becuas ei vcd ont have access to the things I'm supposed to be having. so to me it's better to have nothing than things that are bad. and I've been kinda proud of myself for having less because it's not good stuff. like last night's I had a slice of cheese, half of minimal dinner, then only a little bit of chocolate. but then my siblings got taco bell and now I feel like shit. because I felt bad because they got it specifically for me but I didnt want it but I had it anyways. but I'm proud of how I did today before that!!!!
I want it ti rain. I wanna go outside when there thunder and lightning and pouring rain and just walk around. I want to stand in the rain. the rain makes me happy and calm. I feel safer in the rain. and it's just an overall pleasant thing. of course i don't want it to flood or cause harm to anyone else, but I want it to rain. good thing rain season is coming up soon. it might be cold but I dont care. I've waited too long for it.
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