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jeremy-queere · 2 months

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im actually gonna liveblog my own thoughts about those last few chaps of my fic, which are basically always going to be "i'm hilarious actually" but yknow. specific lines. minor spoilers ig

>be jeremy >tell rich about how you fixed the giant issue where yelling at a squip can turn off every squip in the network >by telling him this aloud, you just alerted the squips to this security flaw >mfw i destroyed the easiest way to save the world without a second thought: :) >still smilling at rich, ready for praise >rich short circuits.

plus with the shutdown that christine mentioned this chapter. it's almost like ? jeremy isn't coming at this from a perspective of wanting to turn squips off???? and never even bothered researching that option??? 😂 bonkers. who'd have thought

i fully recognize that having a coder POV say "The bugs, miraculously, became rarer and smaller" is the biggest ask in the fic in terms of suspension of disbelief. maybe when jeremy is better at this they'll realize they were wrong about that. not in a "this update is secretly a time bomb" way but in a "holy shit i can't believe i used to think this was good programming" way

i still think it's funny whenever i reference jeremy muting themself after the FIRST TIME it came up where jeremy acknowledged that "muting themself wasn't any different from a human just choosing not to speak." i love my weird robot child.

i still like the "C-c-c-c'mon, Jeremy, can't you see, we've got a date, so concentrate! We'll start with us, just me and you, some deja vu, and then ensue: your microchip plus our friendship-" implying "the squip" being sung in the same lovestruck voice as the chorus usually sings "christine."

^ i usually pick a song to write the summary from based solely on vibes and character focus. the fact that this was from Upgrade rather than two player game was a dead giveaway regarding michael's intentions btw.

writing michael after that last mall scene has been so weird. on purpose. but like everything he says is a catchy line ending on a discordant note. the sudden pivot from slowburn to joking about having sex and humanity = romance. every time michael interrupts or talks over jeremy instead of going out of his way to set a good example, i wince lol. encouraging them to stop thinking so much. ignoring every one of jeremy's soft "no"s because they're inconvenient. Here Are Our Stereotypical Nerd Spots and Here Is Your Mandated Giant Teddy Bear and Here Is My Secret Condom. (jeremy sprinted into the sunset before we got to that part and we all thank them for it.) jeremy never once having indicated that they wanted to actually have sex any time soon but michael did everything in his power to make sure the date would end that way without a single worry about what jeremy told them about chloe.

i don't think it's spoilers to clarify that michael was in the driver's seat for all of that, but was in a situation where he was very incentivized to listen to the SQUIP. and jeremy looooves squips so obviously the SQUIP is the expert on this, not michael :P

madeline offscreen: constant orgies, pretending to be from paris, scheming femme fatale madeline for the 2.3 seconds she was onscreen: i swear quebec is better than people give it credit for wait don't go-

jeremy's definition of breaking up with someone is, consistently, running away from an emotionally charged moment and convincing themself that they hate them. lol.

christine accusing jeremy of talking at her was also a direct response to the author trying to get on their wikipedia-level-of-philosophy-knowledge soapbox again. btw on that note, observation selection effect seems to only be mentioned in places as a synonym for the anthropic principle. it is more specific than how jeremy defines it, being an existential thing about how "the range of possible observations that could be made about the universe is limited by the fact that observations could happen only in a universe capable of developing intelligent life" (~ wikipedia <3). i get away with a lot of bullshit claims, some of them even intentionally bullshit, bc the character making those claims is reading even less of the wikipedia article than i am.

but that was transparently just a nod to the book being one of the many parallel universes that are foundational to how the squip works in canon

speaking of references that delight me and me alone, in-character phantom of the opera reference re: pageboy

i think all the main/supporting cast all think they're the main characters. except jeremy! not because of jeremy 1.0's insistence that he's not a leading man, but because they have been so busy with observing themself that they haven't even considered anyone else observing them and coming to different conclusions. (see: the PA system joke with michael which alerted the ENTIRE SCHOOOOooool 🎶 to their situation, which in jeremy's narrative, was just a gag as part of a longer fun flirty convo with michael, brought up for laughs and then forgotten.) (it's not like it's plot relevant as in that it doomed them or anything, but just a signal that not everyone perceives the fic events like jeremy does!!)

they're trying to learn to be less self-absorbed (and i'm not saying that as an insult so much as an accurate description of their default thought patterns) but it IS a learning curve. for all their self-reflection, i would describe them as a very reactive person, which is also probably why they (along with jeremy 1.0 and keanu squip) constantly struggle/d with needing a sense of control

im aware that despite christine's in-character criticism of the narrative i wrote 🙃 that she's here for exposition and emotional closure. she knows and she's not happy about it. it's a consequence of writing the story i wanted to tell but that doesn't make it immune from criticism. it's a good question for me, that the story i wanted to tell DID involve removing her agency so much. but i don't see that as a question that needs a direct answer or for me to defend so much as something to reflect on after it's over. in the meantime christine ma'am i'll give you something good in the epilogue i prommy, and i'll add something about this to my notes now that i think about it.

#ooim

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tomaytow · 2 years

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idol venti x reader brainrot

long spam. (not edited)

so as usual i was talking to the lovely @blooming-cecilia aka miss tala slash tulip about idol venti and first and foremost, i’d like to share this:

LIKE??? if you’re updated with luna’s idol venti istg he would definitely do something like this HAHAH it’s so cute

for the other 4NEMO/5WIRL members: extremely long noodle

for windblume: heart–shaped pastas, heart–shaped everything (venti cooking for his beloved will always be full of so much love.)

like guys, come on. you’ve seen his specialty—his buoyant breeze. it’s the sweetest thing ever, right? 💖

anyway, since we were in such an idol venti mood yesterday (courtesy of miss luna as always) here are other ideas we’ve screamed about:

since your boyfriend is literally an idol, it’s not at all surprising that your alarm or ringtone is definitely one of his songs (his solos).

addition by the great miss tala: considering that you both can’t really spend time with one another that much—because of his packed schedule and maybe yours, too—whenever you have the chance to see each other, venti will definitely steal your phone for a moment so he can record himself. so he can record his voice.

yeaaah, venti found out about the ringtone thing so he wants to change it. basically when you wake up now, you’ll instead hear his soft giggling, sweet murmuring and whispers of good morning, i love you. wake up, my windblume—don’t forget to eat breakfast, and most importantly, don’t ever forget that i love you, always and forever.

cue windblume just smiling like an idiot (with blush on their cheeks) as they prepare their breakfast. you have venti texting you good morning and i love you everyday and now he’s your fricking alarm. you’re obsessed. and he’s obsessed.

venti wants to be the first person you’ll hear, smh.

btw, whenever venti’s feeling a little lonely, he would look at his photos and watch his recorded videos of you. you’re not the only one yearning for him.

also, what if in this au, you’re not really that keen on taking pictures but you just can’t help yourself but capture stolen pictures of your ethereal boyfriend.

he’s so beautiful, and your photo album is filled with his pictures—it’s either he’s dancing excitedly backstage, singing inside a recording studio, him asleep while your finger’s pressed to his cheek, or even a funny picture of him sneezing. (“windblume, delete that!!”)

imagine if you almost want to run a dailyventi instagram account. LOL

actually, scratch that. your priv ig feed (reserved for you and your closest friends) is filled with venti’s pictures

venti’s feed may contain some promotional posts about his idol life or sponsorships, or just him doing his hobbies or him going on traveling—but you know better. you’re all behind those pictures. you are his amazing photographer.

venti also may act like a baby because he wants you to be included! he wants to show you to the world, that you’re his significant other, his lover, but you know that you both can’t do that. idol contracts pain

back to the dailyventi stan account, miss tala suggests that what if you really go through with that acct, and accidentally, you become a stan acct (LOL.) yeah, it’s not your intention—but you are a venti stan, right? you’re his number #1 fan after all!

and this anonymous account is just filled with venti’s pictures and there’s just no info about the owner of that account. your captions only consists of emojis, or even vague stuff, like “aah he’s so cute today” (when is he not), “venti’s in top form today” then [insert a clip of him here] or even a “silly venti”

and your captions are sometimes really vague or revealing

exhibit A:

“💨 🌙”

and it’s a picture of him smiling at the camera. if one sees the photo, they’ll interpret that venti’s cupping his cheek on someone’s face.

what do the emojis mean, the fans wonder.

exhibit B:

“he hates cheese”

and it’s a picture of him pouting at the 2 boxes of pizza on the dining table

fans or the general public may think that the owner of the account may be delusional or a stalker LMAO – but what if the label or agency approves your relationship, to the point that they even support it? you’re both free to do whatever you want, but you two don’t want to announce it on the world because of the toxicity of the fans? and also because you’d like some privacy together?

all in all, the owner of the acct is protected from allegations because there’s just no verified information about it. people have speculated that you may be venti’s lover but then again — there’s no evidence to confirm this theory; even if the diehard fans go investigator mode, there’s nothing they can find because it’s just all venti, venti, venti and the 5wirl members.

in line with this, just imagine that most of the fans just accepted that this is merely a marking strategy

cue venti’s interview when asked abt the account and he’s like — “ehe!” or “oh i’ve seen that acc!! they have a lot of nice hq pics i have to say, whoever runs the acc has some serious skills~”

and also the 5WIRL members covering up for him pls

another tala suggestion: what if venti continues on with the teasing and is like, “ok ill admit it. the photographer is...............my dear xiao” [cue dramatic fainting in xiao's arms like he’s swooning—it’s just for the fanservice and shippers]

unfortunately xiao is not on board with this, not at all, and he’s about to throttle venti because this little shit really has no bounds — but he has to follow his lead since after all, they have to conceal the photographer’s identity! (and it’s just for fun. right? YEAAAAH, xiao will bonk venti on the head later for this.)

these distractions are successful and the so–called shippers can thrive, but some of the people know better. this is just another play at hand, so who really is the photographer? the owner of the account?

also just imagine if xiao also has a secret lover too… 👁

xiao is a private person, reserved, and like the anon account, even the paparazzi can’t even lay a hand on him.

another miss tala suggestion: what if you and xiao’s lover are besties and you both bond while watching their interviews

sometimes you both are little shits as well because if venti and xiao do fanservice things on screen, you both will give them the silent treatment just for fun

(it’s not recommended) cuz venti will be all whiny all day and don’t even get me started on xiao. WHY WILL YOU DO THAT TO HIM??? HE’LL BE SO HURT

also imagine the 5WIRL gc. it’s evident that venti will be the ultimate spammer so he would be like:

“I MISS MY WINDBLUME CAN I SKIP PRACTICE TODAY 🥺🥺”

“hey kazuha can you check windblume for me 🥺🥺”

“xiao do you think my windblume still loves me even though we haven’t seen each other for a day”

“venti istg”

“AETHER HOLD MEEEEEE I’M SOOOOO HEARTBROKEN”

“why? what’s wrong?”

“I’M SO DEPRIVED OF MY WINDBLUME”

+ (and because of the heizou hangout event what if-)

“heizou ☺️☺️ can you please not flirt with my windblume ☺️☺️”

“and yes i’ve noticed ☺️☺️ you try to be subtle but i can see it a mile away.”

“do that again and i’ll change our netflix password so you won’t be able to watch the new season of the blacklist ☺️☺️”

yeah venti doesn’t pay their netflix subscription (we have miss jean for that!!!) but i bet my chocolates that he has the capability to do that

also since miss tala and i love the chaotic besties venti and xiao agenda, we have more hcs about those two in this idol au

in luna’s venti cinematic universe, venti and xiao were former roommates. miss tala hcs that xiao immediately reserved the farthest room away from venti after hearing the news that they can have their own rooms now (since he doesn’t want to be next to venti’s room anymore because my damn boy noisy af LOL)

but despite that, venti still manages to annoy him and the other members. archons help them

also what if what if, in the same cinematic universe, xiao knows about venti’s secret relationship? 👀

like pre-room separation, xiao can hear their late night calls and he’s just. so done with it

venti’s just all sweet and flowery words to his windblume like the romantic he is and xiao is just

“VENTI IT’S FUCKING 3 AM STOP MAKING KISSY NOISES THAT’S SO GROSS”

“MIND YOUR BUSINESS ALATUS”

“NO SHUT UP IF I HEAR ‘I LOVE YOU THE MOSTEST TIMES ONE BILLION’ I WILL END YOU”

and venti knows that he can trust xiao with his life. even aether seems to think so. he’s just a generally nice guy (and even op will reveal her secrets to him ngl cuz he probably wouldn’t care)

he’s irritated by venti, yes, but he knows that he’s not cruel or anything, so he’ll let him off the hook. even if he wants to flick him in the forehead hard for being such a bastard sometimes.

and xiao is such a softie he will absolutely not allow windblume to be separated from BARBATOS

another addition by the amazing miss tala as always: “he thinks hed rather stay up hearing him make kissy noises than hearing him [venti] sobbing himself to sleep”

YEAHHHH GOING TO THE ANGST FEST. no one can ever escape the angst

yeah, venti can get real lonely, we know that. :((

he just really misses his windblume

though venti tries to hide this, xiao notices and even attempts to make him feel better. like offering him some of those apple–flavored candies that he loves so much, or if he’s feeling generous, dandelion wine (though this is not often because a drunk venti will get more 10x annoying.)

or maybe even sometimes, xiao texts windblume to ask them about venti’s situation; to ask how to comfort him

he may do this discreetly because xiao can’t handle it if venti all goes puppy–eyed and is just THANK YOU XIAOOOO once venti realizes what he’s doing

xiao wants to avoid getting thanked genuinely because he still doesn’t know how to respond to them properly (cute little bean)

xiao probably got windblume’s number when venti fell asleep while talking to them on the phone

xiao knew it was windblume he was talking to because who would venti call around late nights and the contact name is just windblume with a lot of heart emojis

"u know how to keep a secret, unlike venti so...."

"yes, i understand, i won't mention you contacting me."

"....thanks. and if you need help..."

"yes i promise to contact you if i need help. thanks again, xiao. for this, and for looking out for venti for me. i'm glad you're his roomie."

"...yeah. (end call)”

(written by miss tala btw, and it’s super duper sweet!)

xiao remembering venti tearfully (yet reluctantly) confessing that he really misses his windblume. but now, he’s all grins—dazed, enamored, happy while talking to his beloved on his phone.

so windblume really means a lot to him.

also, regarding windblume’s contact saved on venti’s phone, imagine xiao just scolding venti when windblume calls just as practice ended and his phone was near someone else: “can u make it any more obvious!!! why are you so bad at keeping secrets... unlike them”

venti: HEY!!! arent u supposed to be on my side instead of theirs!!! we're roomies >:(((

xiao: they're my friend. you're just a roomie.

venti: dramatically falls onto his knees in the corner of the practice room. nobody turns to look, used to his antics

also i WAS inspired by a venti and xiao fanart where they’re both wearing dark caps and dark masks to hide their real identities ofc, and i thought: venti would definitely tell xiao to join him to go outside just so they can “see what windblume’s up to” though xiao straight up tells him that this is weird and it’s stalking.

cue venti yelling at him “BUT I’M THEIR BOYFRIEND WTF???” and it’s just so hilarious because they need to be damn careful and be less inconspicuous but venti’s just

“don’t fucking put your mask down—“

“BUT I WANT TO DRINK—“

“they know what your fucking lips and nose look like, venti.”

“don’t remove your cap—“

“it’s hot—“

“i will shave your head off.”

“YOU WOULDN’T.”

“xiao should i buy them some flowers? what do you think?”

“gross.”

“BWUH- how rude! i didn’t respond to you like this when you were asking love letter advice from me?? remember valentine’s day??? REMEMBER [INSERT XIAO’S S/O HERE]???”

“what if you shut up now”

after that, imagine once they finally find windblume (in their usual place or it’s just outside their workplace) venti and xiao are surprised that they’re kinda swarmed by some men. it doesn’t matter if they’re your friends or they’re merely your colleagues, but venti thinks that they’re a little too close for his liking and his bubbly mood just melts.

“ahhh, my windblume is right there!! my sweet, sweet windblume… xiao, hold me. i think i won’t be able to resist engulfing them in my arms and kissing them—“

“ok.”

“OUCH! BE GENTLE! DO YOU HOLD YOUR LOVER LIKE THIS?”

“you’re not them, so no.”

“fair. also. wait? who are those men?”

“…”

“xiao, hold me. hold me.”

“i am holding y— what th— VENTI—“

yeaaaah, xiao really has to hold venti down if they don’t wanna expose themselves in the process. and also, calm his jealous friend. him being jealous is funny but it’s such a hassle.

windblume’s phone

a notif from xiao

your boyfriend is sulking. how do i make him stop. he won’t stop glaring at my bird plushies, and he loves my bird plushies. please call him.

xiao’s phone

a notif from [name] [surname]

wait, what happened??

windblume’s phone

a notif from xiao

just call him.

and thus, the calling session (the ones with kissy noises and lots of cheesy i love yous) with venti begins once more.

we also talked abt more idol venti angst but i don’t wanna share that anymore cuz i want to be happy

#venti x reader #YEAAAAH IDOL VENTI MY LOVE #i just drank my venti caramel macchiato and my head is spinning #yeah i went to starbucks so i shamelessly ordered venti #uh-huh #anyway #MY HEAD HURTS #BUT #here is some venti crumbs for the venti stans out there #thank u so much to miss tala for feeding me in our dms #this is my compensation after my absence LOL #yeaaaah i love luna’s idol venti universe #tomato.thoughts

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cvrnelians · 11 months

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Thank you so much for the follow 🙏🏼🥰 I hope to make a real proper blog someday. I'm just to lazy to do anything with this one lol. Still,I appreciate it very much,especially when it's from a writer,I feel honored 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 I love If Fates Allow It btw. You write so beautifully and consistently and IFAI Bucky was just so adorable that I was rooting for him because it seems like a fluff fic at the beginning but I'm also a sucker for dark fics so I love seeing his reveal and transition to his dark side or soft dark one for now. Btw,how many chapters do you think IFAI will have? And when will the next chapter come out? If you can't answer this one because of personal reasons,I understand and I'm sorry 🙏🏼 But I'll wait no matter how long it takes and probably reread IFAI again cause it was just damn good! 😍

Thank you so much for this ♥️

I tend to like my obsessive characters on the sweeter, more affectionate side. I think that makes them even more terrifying than dark!characters who are just flat out evil, because they’ll delude themselves into thinking they have the best of intentions and that they’re doing the right thing—when in all reality, all they’re doing is causing harm.

I’m not really sure when the next update will be tbh. I have the chapter outlined, I just have to get the words on paper. Im thinking it should be around 15ish chapters. Shit is about to go DOWN lol

#cvrnelians ask

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queer-queen-bean · 2 years

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Hey fellas

I really appreciate the like 30 of you who consistently like & reblog my stuff (even though 99% of this blog isn't original stuff) so I wanna update y'all.

I genuinely don't remember when my last update was so here we go I guess? I'm a queer trans woman going by the name Thorn and she/her pronouns. I work as a worship pastor at a baptist (🤮) church, but I'm applying to new jobs and hoping to work in an affirming ministry where I can have at least a more genuine mask.

I finally have an ADHD (inattentive) diagnosis and I'm working up to an appointment to get a prescription for meds for it, which has been a journey and a half.

I got married earlier this year, and we have a cat!

I don't have any intention to get more followers or anything like that, so I'm really glad I've found a niche with y'all who do follow this blog!

Btw this is technically a side blog so if I'm following you it's from @literally-nemo, I promise I'm not just holding out on you 😅

#personal #about me #update

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shepherds-of-haven · 3 years

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I hope you’re having a great day Lena! I was just wondering if we could have any fluff facts about the shepherds as a whole! Like fun tidbits of how they interact with each other, what some of them do if they have the same day off, does anyone host weekly game nights?? I hope that makes sense! Reading the recent short story on Patreon I love seeing how the characters interact with one another and now I need moreeeeeee🙏

Ooh, great question! I’m feeling curiously tapped dry at the moment, so I’ll probably have to reblog this as more ideas come to me; I’m so happy you’re enjoying the short story, btw!! 💖

Some group dynamic headcanons:

Many of them steal clothes from each other. Briony wears a cute sweater of Shery's (she asked), Ayla gets cold so she just takes one of Red's jackets from a chair (she didn't ask), Chase gives Tallys his scarf one day and Riel corders Trouble a pair of gloves from a fashion line he favors because his old ones are holey and they get into an argument about it... This leads to some recruits mistakenly thinking that the captains are all involved in some sort of mass relationship because they keep walking out of each other's rooms wearing each other's clothes. (The recruits believe a lot of really dumb stuff, if you couldn't tell. They LOVE gossip. It's like a competitive sport in the compound)

There is a weekly card game night, initiated and organized first by Chase, but it grows bigger over time, with snacks, cakes, drinks, and new games being procured! I'd actually say it's more like every ten-fourteen days or so than on any set weekday, and is typically proposed by anyone who senses that they or others need to blow off some steam. They all tend to meet in a private common room and either just chill and play some card games and casually drink and listen to music, or they get LOUD and raucous and play more risque non-card games (like Question or Command/Truth or Dare). The loud nights are more like once a month or bi-monthly, though! They take place in the captains' lounge so dumb recruits don't get to join! It's rare that they're in there all doing the same thing, though: maybe half will be at the table playing card games while others will be broken up into smaller groups, say arm-wrestling in the corner or playing chess at the smaller table or reading, but they're all there! Game nights are almost never held unless everyone is there, which is extraordinarily difficult to schedule, but they all make an effort to make it happen--even those who first had to be dragged into it, like Blade or Riel!

Speaking of chess games, Red and Riel have a standing game where they complete at least four more moves every night that they're around and able to meet up after dinner. Planning their next move helps them both break up the monotony of the day, and it's something they enjoy immensely. However, whenever he gets called away on a mission, Red gets sick with worry that Riel's been cooking up all sorts of schemes while he's been gone, so sometimes on the road he has, like, a schematic that he doodles on trying to anticipate Riel's next move, and it's very nerdy and ramps up in joking Anxiety. Riel, graciously, goes easier on him on nights after he comes back from long trips, though he denies it

Similarly, Blade and Trouble have a standing training session once a week where they just beat the crap out of each other. This is generally where they do the majority of their talking

Briony and Ayla first had an agreement that they would get the other one up if they overslept (Briony tends to be the one who oversleeps while Ayla is better about being up at dawn, but Ayla is really grouchy if she went to bed late and Briony is the only one who can handle her), which morphed into doing runs and sparring together at dawn and having breakfast frequently!

The girls have a standing spa night once a month where they all get together in a room (usually Shery’s) and basically do sleepover stuff and relax and chat and catch up for a few hours. This also sometimes involves showing each other new outfits that they bought that month! Sometimes there are even group baths in the big common bath, but these are rarer because Shery is shy and Tallys doesn’t like sitting in hot water getting pruny

Chase and Trouble drag Red and Halek to go drinking with them around once a month; sometimes Blade is persuaded to go if Trouble can get the drop on him and punch him hard enough to wind him. It’s complicated

Riel and Shery, of course, have tea together once a week! You’re not allowed if you can’t bring a chill vibe (Riel’s rules). Tallys, Lavinet, Halek, and Red are occasional visitors; Briony is allowed on a good day. Blade would be allowed but he has 0 interest

Similarly, Lavinet hosts a weekly brunch, either in a courtyard or at some restaurant in town! Typically it’s a girl thing and Ayla, Briony, and Shery are the most consistent attendees, but Chase has snuck his way in there often, and Riel, Halek, or Red pop up occasionally!

Tallys and Halek cook together! It’s not all that often and doesn’t seem to have any set way of materializing--it just happens somehow--but they both very much enjoy it! Sometimes they cook dinner for the whole group and have a little dinner party that they both secretly get excited for! Sometimes Shery bakes the dessert!

Riel noticed that Tallys has a little garden that she spends time weeding, so he sends gardening tools or special seeds when he thinks she needs them and she leaves baskets of vegetables or vases of flowers in his office. All of this is done without exchanging a word

Chase sporadically teaches Briony acrobatics and things like tightrope walking, just randomly whenever they’re both idle. She teaches him how to gut people with bare fists and also sometimes they paint!

Caine caught Red grazing in the pantry late one night and now it’s like a Thing where they pass each other in the kitchen and Red sort of just looks the other way re: Caine’s bedtime and what on earth he’s doing up so late and Caine doesn’t tell anybody that Red is just absent-mindedly eating a loaf of bread at 2 AM because he was too busy working to remember to eat dinner. It’ll be like, “there’s some turkey leftover from dinner in the cold box” “oh hey, Caine. thanks. ...so, what’s the news from the midnight watch tonight?” “i’m going to go hunt ghosts on the seventh floor with my friends!” “...okay! have fun!”

Lavinet has a monthly shopping trip where she updates her wardrobe, and it is very common for others to accompany her around the city and just shop while they drop! Common partners are Shery, Briony, Riel, Chase, and once memorably Blade, who didn’t know what he was in for!

Trouble and Ayla are wildly competitive and keep arm-wrestling each other for money; this becomes a bi-weekly sporting event that is eagerly attended and bet upon by third parties

There was ONE group karaoke night. ONE. Most of them got so blackout drunk that they swore to never do it again. Even now, several of them go green whenever they hear a popular bar song (“Don’t Piss Where You Plant Your Flowers”) being sung, especially badly

The game of "telephone" gets really bad in their group. It's like, Shery will say to Briony that she's worried because she thought Riel looked a bit peaky and feverish. Briony will say in passing to Trouble that Riel is getting sick and Shery is worried. Trouble will say to Tallys that Shery is worried sick because Riel is bedridden. Tallys will be mixing herbs and Chase will ask what for and Tallys will reply that Riel is sick, but because she's mixing herbs, Chase will surmise that the sickness must be quite advanced, and will later say, "Damn, have you seen Riel? Seems like he's really sick." Red will interpret this as "I have seen Riel for myself and have determined that he's extremely ill." At least four people will bust into Riel's room, expecting him to be on the verge of death, despite the fact that they saw Riel that morning. Riel will be fine and very annoyed at the intrusion.

They rarely go out as a group to bars and establishments outside of the compound (too chaotic as well as risky, for one thing, and also, recruits don't need to see their superiors like hanging out of bushes and dancing on tabletops drunk out of their minds, and also, "Mages can't drink" (lol)), but when they do deem it a worthy occasion (Trouble's birthday, say), the girls are very punctual when getting ready, and the boys are almost always extremely late due to various shenanigans (Chase forgot that he put a booby trap on Red’s door, covering Red with flour, or a cat somehow slips into Trouble’s room and steals, like, a detonator or an important key, and they have to go chasing it across the city). This has led to the girls coming late on purpose in order to even out their arrival, but mysteriously, this has only led to even later start times, meaning they often don’t get started until like 10 or 11 PM when the most well-intentioned souls meant to be in bed by midnight... that never happens, either!

One such night once led to them ending up on a ridge in the Sun’s Embrace, like a mile outside of the city, in order to watch the sun rise together, because hiking in the dark while blasted out of their minds sounded like a really good idea. They all made it, and the dawn was spectacular, but the moment was ruined when Tallys said softly, “It’s the beginning of a beautiful new day--” punctuated by Trouble abruptly throwing up in a bush and Riel just flat-out passing out

#Shepherds of Haven #group #group dynamic #all characters #found family #drinking #cw: alcohol #drunk #shenanigans #party #parties #long #long post

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cometblaster2070 · 3 years

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Alrighty Owl House Fandom, let me share with you an interesting little story which I would classify as ‘A Glitch In The Matrix.’

I was just browsing through Pinterest, with absolutely no real intention in mind aside from the vague thought that I should watch the new Owl House episode before it got spoiled for me.

(BTW, this was Keeping Up With A-fearances)

SO, while looking at cute lumity art, I see a twitter post (on Pinterest) about the Owl House.

Now, the image was loading so I could only make out the words ‘Owl House,’ and since I knew for a fact that Pinterest updates once in a blue moon, I decided to check the post out, thinking it’d be good for a laugh.

Only, it was something different.

Something weirder.

When I clicked it and the image cleared, I read the big bold words, ‘Owl House Spoilers,’ and knew I had fucked up.

But thinking that I’d already spoiled things for myself, I decided, hell with it, I’ll read the whole post.

It consisted of three images and (of course) a caption.

The first image showed Boscha. But in a very different light than the one we were used to seeing her in.

Boscha was slumped against a very dirty wall in a dark, dingy room. She was on the floor, she was crying her eyes out, and her hair was all scattered and messy.

She looked like a mess.

In the other two pictures, it showed Luz and Amity. Both of them were inside of a closet, (get it?) and the first picture showed Amity holding Luz’s hands.

[It should also be noted that we couldn’t see their faces, the ‘camera’ was focused on their hands]

And THEN, in the second picture, it shows Amity leaning towards Luz and Luz stiffens up suddenly as if surprised. While this all is happening, a small, flaming purple heart appears between them.

The caption read something like:

‘I REALLY enjoyed this episode, I loved how they focused more on Boscha and the insane amount of pressure she’s under and how it slowly chips away at her mental health. On the other hand though, the Lumity kiss is what really sold me on this episode! Like can you believe they kissed? Absolutely adorable!’

As you may have guessed, my poor bisexual heart went wild and I was absolutely ecstatic at the fact that we got a Lumity kiss in episode 4 of season 2.

I read the episode’s name and thought, ‘Huh, this refers to how Boshca has to keep up appearances, right?’

My finger was literally shaking when I pressed the episode number on ymy bootleg site.

And then....

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

No Lumity.

No Boscha.

Amity wasn’t even in it!

Don’t get me wrong, I loved the episode, but this just confused me.

And I’m still not sure what I saw there on Pinterest, because it’s like that post has disappeared; I can’t find it anywhere!

Give me your thoughts.

Edit: To those saying I got duped by the season 2 deepfake that came a long, long time ago, I assure you, I’ve seen those fake scenes, this wasn’t them.

Update: Learned what it was and where it came from.

I have been bamboozled by someone who put together some very convincing shots.

I am broken hearted, yet I also kind of expected this...

Either way, I’m going to eat ice cream, bye

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katetheworm · 3 years

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Naud Bui Amarth

Note: My buffer of three chapters is dwindling to one and a half now, but that's okay. I really just wanted to update this because I feel like it. Anyway, thank you for reading, and comments, reblogs, etc are more than welcome! (This is not proofread btw)

Pairing: Aragorn x Original Female Character/Reader

Warnings: None

Rating: G

Words: 3,057

Part Three (Part One : Part Two : Part Four ; Part Five)

The next day consisted of mostly walking and only resting at nightfall. The hobbits, especially Pippin, were very distraught at this fact, having been raised on many more meals throughout the day other than breakfast and dinner. Cefrey could not blame the young lads as she also found herself craving another meal after many hours of hiking up and down hills, across streams, and through dense woods.

They were trekking up one of those hills when Cefrey decided to finally ask what was on everyone’s minds. No one had asked before as they were all preoccupied with getting as far away from the Nazgul as possible.

She moved a little faster to catch up to Strider -- he truly lived up to the name, his legs were long and his resolve unwavering when it came to covering as much ground as they could. “So, where exactly are you taking us?”

“Into the wild.” Was his only answer.

She could have guessed that his response would be something as vague as that, and yet she still felt her eyes roll at his comment. Without changing her pace, Cefrey stayed walking next to the ranger, intent on figuring out what his plan was.

“You could at least specify a bit more than that, Strider.” The way she spoke his name was one of suspicion and speculation that his true name was more than the title the townsfolk gifted him.

The ranger lifted a brow at her statement, her words and attitude amusing him. “Well, if you truly must know, we are going to Rivendell, land of the elves.”

As Cefrey smiled the hobbits behind her began whispering quite loudly. Sam was very excited to go see the elves while the others were still a little wary of the true meaning their guide held. The mage was fairly happy to learn they were going to Rivendell. It was, in fact, one of her favorite places to visit, and she would at every chance she got. Which, unfortunately, wasn’t very many. Cefrey was indeed quite busy most of the time. At least, busy in her terms.

The sun began to set more and the ranger knew it was time to settle down for the night. He told the hobbits to make camp and rest under the large trees surrounding them while he kept watch. Cefrey helped her companions settle down and watched them fondly as they fell asleep after eating. She had grown to care for the four halflings quite a bit after the short time she spent with them. They reminded the sorceress of herself in some ways. So carefree and quaint, and yet they were able to carry such a burden without so much of a single complaint.

Strider had noticed the woman’s sudden perk up when he mentioned the elven city and wondered if she was more than she appeared. He knew that she was unlike the race of men, but what exactly made her that way?

“Miss Cefrey, have you been to Rivendell before?”

Her smile widened even more at the question. However, that action made her confused. She hated being asked questions, so why was she so keen on answering his? She shook off that thought and chose to indulge the man beside her.

“Yes, I have been to Rivendell, on many occasions, actually. It’s quite the wondrous place to be. So many books to read!” She twirled on her feet, a few stray locks of dark golden hair swaying in the wind before she sat down next to the ranger on a small boulder, her green eyes sparkling both with joy and the moon’s light.

She sighed longingly, thinking about the many hours, sometimes even days, she would spend in the libraries of Lord Elrond. Her expression saddened. She had not visited the elves there in many years. Her days had been occupied by many things. Though, now that she thought about it, what had she been doing during those years? Collecting herbs and flowers, experimenting with her powers, writing and reading any and every book she found. She hadn’t led a very eventful life. At least, before this little adventure she was a part of.

The ranger watched her as she pondered, lost in her own thoughts. He realized he knew nothing about her. And yet he felt as if he had known her for years. He knew there was no spell on him, he had no disease. So why did his heart ache whenever he looked into her eyes. Why did he feel so strange when she sat close to him, their body heat mixing, making his eyes linger on her form when she wasn’t looking at him. He had never felt this way about anyone except… No, not even with her. This was different. He had known the mage for not even two days, though his heart and mind thought otherwise.

“Strider?”

Her voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and her question snapped the blonde out of hers.

She waited for no response from the ranger, having realized he rarely spoke unless completely necessary. “I realize now that you are speaking the truth when you say you are a friend of Gandalf’s…” Cefrey stared up at the bright moon, a thoughtful look in her eyes. “It was odd. When we first met in the inn, I wanted to believe you were untrustworthy. That you were not truly there to help us, help Frodo… but I couldn’t. It was almost as if…” She trailed off, realizing that she was rambling and laughed a bit at her words. “Oh, don’t mind me, ranger,” She patted his shoulder before standing up, gazing into the darkness of the trees. “I will be back by sunrise. Don’t leave without me!” She called over her shoulder, walking into the blackened woods.

The ranger narrowed his eyes at the fading silhouette of the sorceress, unsure of whether or not he should stop her or at least go with her. He shook his head, his gaze turning to the four hobbits sleeping restlessly behind him. He couldn’t leave them unprotected. Cefrey was more than capable of handling herself. Strider chuckled at that thought. Of course she was. She was mistaken as a wizard by many folk so she had to have been at least powerful enough to protect herself.

He sighed and stared up at the moon, wondering what she was thinking when she looked up at that bright light…

… Cefrey didn’t actually have to go anywhere, she really just wanted to get away from the ranger for a bit. He made her… feel things. Things she didn’t know how to describe, much less deal with when she was sitting right next to him, their shoulders brushing every so often. Her face heated up at the memory of being so close to him. And that was why she had to get away.

The forest at this time of night was almost like a completely different place than in the daytime. It was beautiful still, of course, but its beauty was that of mystery and darkness, while in the sunlight, it was calming and warm. The mage wandered through the woods, the streaks of moonlight illuminating her path. She knew not where she was going, just that she was. The journey is not about the destination, after all.

As she meandered through the forest, her thoughts also took a short stroll. Although they always landed back on the ranger. She didn’t know what to think of him. Was he someone she could grow close to? She hadn’t many friends, other than Gandalf, and maybe the four hobbits in her care. Though she still didn’t feel such a connection to them as she did with Strider. And she had known the halflings longer, and she had dealt with the Nazgul with them. It all didn’t make much sense to her.

Cefrey happened upon a small pond with a waterfall pouring into it. The air around the water was more humid than the rest of the woods as water sprayed into the air. The dull roar of the fall added to the ambiance of the wind and forest creatures around the blonde. She smiled softly at the scene before her. The calming nature of the pond and the sounds around her making her relax immensely.

Her thoughts drifted around in her mind as she sat on the grass next to the pond. Closing her eyes, the mage listened to the music of the wild; the bugs, the birds, the gurgling of water, it all added to the harmony surrounding her. Cefrey laid her head down on the soft grass, the sounds soon lulling her to sleep.

As the sun peeked over the hills and shone through the many trees, its light rested on a certain mage, resting peacefully near a small pond. Her eyes fluttered open, the sleep slowly removing itself from her body. Sitting up, Cefrey yawned loudly and brushed off the dirt and grass that clung to her clothes and skin. She noticed the rising sun and her eyes widened, her previous exhaustion leaving completely. She had to get back to the hobbits and… and Strider.

Stretching as she stood, the blonde recalled her trek through the woods and took the path back to the camp. She picked a few flowers and herbs along the way that she thought would be useful and stuck some into her belt, the flowers in her hair. Once she made it back to the camp, her companions were already packed and ready to go; the hobbits waited around the small horse while Strider was waiting at the edge of the woods, the way she had left during the night.

His eyes widened subtly, and if she hadn’t been looking, she wouldn’t have noticed it. The ranger took in her appearance, the disheveled dark blonde hair, tied into a low bun, with wild flowers peeking out the back and front, along with the just-woken-up blush on her freckled cheeks.

Cefrey smiled at the ranger, a kind, quaint smile, one that reminded him of a cool spring day, laden with pink flowers out the window. He turned his head, staring out into the distance towards their path.

“We must continue on.”

The mage agreed with his statement, nodding her head, and ushered the hobbits to walk ahead of her, albeit disappointed that the ranger passed over her appearance without so much of a comment or even one of his tiny smiles. Why was she so hellbent on getting him to like her?

Hiking a couple feet behind the halflings, Cefrey tried to collect her thoughts. She never realized until now that being with other people -- even if she rarely spoke to them -- made the time go by way more slowly than when she was alone. She thought it would be faster, but somehow walking next to these four hobbits, talking to Strider, thinking about Strider. It all made her days pass by in a much slower state. It was almost as if when she was by herself, she wouldn't think about the time passing, she would just do random things. Granted, those things did make her happy… they just seemed monotonous compared to the things she had done with Frodo and Sam, Merry and Pippin… with Strider.

Taking in a deep breath of fresh air, they continued on, past the forest after another night there and into windswept moors. Patches of moss green vegetation littered the snow-covered ground. Sam led the pony who was packed with their supplies while the three other hobbits walked behind him, Strider taking the front a few feet ahead.

Cefrey was too preoccupied with her thoughts that she didn’t really pay attention to what the others were doing. That is, until she was hit in the head with an apple. She cursed under her breath as the pain bloomed on her forehead, stopping to place her hand over it. She hadn’t noticed that she had walked in front of the hobbits and received a good bonk to the head as Strider was trying to make a point to Pippin.

Said ranger turned after he heard the mage curse and a frown made its way to his face. “I, uh. Sorry, Cefrey, didn’t know you were there.”

“Yeah, neither did I, apparently,” She retorted with amusement in her voice. She noticed the dour expression on Strider and shook her head, rubbing the spot where the apple hit. “Don’t worry, I’ve endured worse.”

The man still felt guilty for hitting the poor sorceress, but knew that they had to keep going if they were going to get to Rivendell at a reasonable time. Strider was aiming for the hobbit, he was trying to hit him in the head. So why did he feel so bad for hitting her? He chalked it up to be some chivalry that was buried under the layers of the dark exterior he put up.

She smiled at the ranger again, trying to dissuade his obvious guilt. She didn’t want him to feel bad. She wanted him to be happy… with her. No. Not with her. He probably prefers to be alone. There was no way he would want to be with her, happy or not.

She sighed and continued walking.

They camped in the moor for the next two nights and went on once the sun rose each day. Cefrey slept well those nights, under the stars, even as the snow dampened her clothes and made her shiver. She would have been colder than she actually was, but during the darkness someone draped a black cloak over her form, keeping the iciness at bay. Though when she woke, the cloak was gone, taken off before she rose from sleep and clasped back over the shoulders of the ranger. She never even noticed it was there.

They trekked through the rest of the moor for the beginning half of the day, soon walking into a wet marshland, bugs flying everywhere, and water soaking their clothes. The hobbits swatted the insects away, complaining the entire time they marched through the swamp. A few of them fell into the water, more than once, and each time, Cefrey would help them up, offering what she could in sympathy, as the midges and water annoyed her too.

It seemed that the sun set faster on that day, forcing the group to make a small camp sooner than they would like. At least, than what Strider and the mage would have liked, the halflings were more than happy to take a break, their legs sore from trying to keep up with their much taller companions.

The ranger went out to hunt, their food source had dwindled as the days passed. And, Cefrey amused that he also just wanted to be away for a moment, catch his breath, be alone. She understood that. More than she would care to admit, in all honesty. She may have preferred to stay isolated most of her years, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t enjoyed the time spent with people. In fact, the time she had spent with the four hobbits and Strider was some of the happier moments she could remember.

Starting a small fire by gathering a few logs and simply sparking it with her fingers, the mage waited silently on her bedroll, listening to the conversation the hobbits exchanged. Sometimes she would feel pity for the four of them. They were thrust into a situation entirely out of their control and utterly different than what they were all used to. Frodo definitely had the adventure spirit in him, just as his uncle. But the others? Merry and Pippin were there for the ride, while Sam… Poor, kind Sam, was always watching over Frodo, making sure he kept his promise to Gandalf. He might have dreamed of seeing the elves, but once they got to Rivendell, Cefrey was sure he would want to go straight back home, to his garden and his hobbit hole. And she couldn’t blame him, not one bit.

Strider came back after an hour or so, bringing with him a small deer that was hauled over his shoulder. They ate the venison, grateful for a full belly after many days with meager portions. Cefrey couldn’t deny that his kill was extremely filling, making her all the more glad the strange ranger accompanied them on their journey. There was no way she could have killed that animal. Both out of sadness and simply a lack of skill.

Soon after, with filled bellies and tired bodies, the hobbits fell asleep, the smoke of the fire keeping most of the bugs at bay. Cefrey, on the other hand, could not sleep. Her mind was racing, her thoughts jumping from one to another. Until she heard a faint singing.

Not wanting to disturb the soft tune, the blonde slowly rose from her blanket, her eyes adjusting to the darkness rather quickly. A smile tugged at her lips as she saw who was singing. Strider, always keeping watch, sat on a log, pipe in hand while he sang quite a forlorn melody.

“Tin viel elvanui,

Elleth alfirin ethelhael

O hon ring finnil fuinui…”

Before she could stop herself, another part of the song slipped from her mouth, “A renc gelebrin thiliol.”

The ranger turned his head slightly, not expecting another to know what he sang of. “You know of the Song of Beren and Lúthien?” Not needing an answer, Strider shook his head amusedly. “Of course. Someone as well-versed as you would know of many elvish hymns.”

Cefrey stood up from her resting spot, bringing the blanket with her, and sat down beside the guide, laying the piece of cloth over her legs. “Yes, and while you seem to know so much of my knowledge, I did not expect you to know these elvish tunes. And not only that, you sing them well, in perfect Sindarin.”

“We Dunedain are not uncivilized, my friend.”

She sighed, “I did not mean to offend, merely…” Stopping, she noticed his tone of voice. “You were teasing me?”

Without needing to answer, the ranger laughed lightly, the mage playfully hit his arm. They stayed up the rest of the night, keeping watch both on the hobbits, and on the bright stars.

#lord of the rings #aragorn x reader #aragorn x oc #original female character #aragorn #aragorn love story #fluff #naud bui amarth #part three #kate writes

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recurring-polynya · 3 years

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Hi! I really like the weekly updates on writing you post (I’m in favor of adding teasers for upcoming chapters btw). This might be an obvious question, but how you keep track of your progress? Do you log evert writing session, or have a weekly round up? I write really slowly and sporadically, so it’s hard for me to gauge how much progress I’m making. Thanks!

Gosh, thanks!

So, first and foremost, I want to make it clear that tracking my writing both helps my productivity and it makes me feel good. Writing, especially long things, can be sort of a lonesome enterprise, and having some "numbers go up" aspect of it is positive feedback that gives me that sweet, sweet dopamine. For some people, tracking metrics results in stress and guilt, in which case, just don't do it! But I am happy to talk about what works for me!

So, I def do not track by individual writing session. That stressed me out even just thinking about it. 😂

I vary this up a little bit depending on what I'm working on, but I'll use my current project as an example. It's a longform story that I had been working on, on-and-off for a while, but I picked it up in earnest in July. I had about 50k words of disconnected scenes scattered around three Google docs, and a somewhat functional outline, at least for the first half of the story, although it was a little rougher towards the end. The first thing I did was to work on the outline a little more and get that into better shape.

At that point, I started a few Google doc and set my tracker to 0. As you might expect, the early part of the fic was a lot better filled out than later sections. I started at the beginning, and copy-pasted the scenes from one of the three old docs into the new one until I hit a hole. Then I had to fill in the hole before I could move forward. I sort of do this on a chapter-by-chapter basis, where I am allowed to have TODOs (I literally mark things I haven't written with the word TODO because it's easy to use the search function for) within the current chapter I am working on. As I finish each chapter, I make a note in the outline as to how many words it is.

Now, because I have been keeping these sorts of statistics for a few years now, I have a very honest understanding of my own writing productivity. I know what 1000 words feels likes and I know what 10,000 words feels like. After getting about three chapters filled in this way, I said, 'this is going to take me 1-2 weeks per chapter, working at my normal pace.'

Every week, as you know, I do a post on Tumblr, which includes how many words I wrote, and also some stuff about how I felt. I literally just do a Shift-Ctrl-C to get my total word count and subtract the number from the previous week's Tumblr post. These posts are very valuable to me for a couple of reasons:

1) Accountability. I'm more likely to meet a goal if every week I have to own up to how much work I did.

2) Looking back at the week before and saying, hey, what worked? What didn't work? Sometimes I just have bad weeks. Sometimes I hit a piece of sticky writing and my word count might be really low because I re-wrote something sixteen times. It happens. It's okay. The goal is for me to know how I am, because that helps me better set my expectations.

3) Looking forward to the upcoming week. Maybe my kid has a big project due at school, and it's helpful for me to say, "I'm not gonna get a lot done this week and that's fine." Or, I might say, "This week looks clear and I have every expectation of finishing Ch 7 this week" and then I do it.

Setting achievable goals and then consistently meeting them is an extremely powerful productivity skill. I do this in micro, too. I said earlier that it would stress me out to track wordcount per session, but what I do do is I sit down with an intention. If I have a big open section with nothing written, the goal might just to freewheel a little, to get some ideas on the page, to see where it's going. Conversely, I might have three scenes that are almost done, but they lack beginning or endings or they don't flow together properly, and that might be one evening's work. (Which is sometimes, like, 7 sentences, but those 7 sentences can be harder to write than 50 sentences of the freewheeling). I'm not super strict about those per session goals, but it's something to focus on and I meet them more often than not.

A lot of people talk about having a certain time to write every day. I do, because that's just the way my life works-- It's usually about 7:30-9:30 pm, between the times that my kids start their pre-bed wind-down time and when my husband and I watch tv together. This is not 100% writing time-- it's also when I draw or write Tumblr posts and I also just goof off a lot, it's just my free time. I may have other times that I get to write, especially now that my kids are back in school, but I've had this time blocked out for several years now.

Every time I try to describe one of my writing processes to my husband, he makes fun of me, because it turns out to be some bastardized software engineering technique. If this sounds like a pared-down, one-woman version of Scrum, it's because it is.

To summarize:

- I set a realistic goal over a medium length period (two weeks for one chapter)

- I set a mini goal every time I sit down to work

- Every week, I report on my progress, reflect on how the last week went, and think about the week ahead

- I track word count because it's very measurable. How many words I write in a given time period is one measure of "how well I did" but it also gives me a sense of the pacing of the story and how to get the chapters balanced. Different stories are different-- in the one I'm working on, the chapters are 7k-12k each, but in another fic they're 2-4k. There is no right or wrong answer, the purpose is just to have self-knowledge.

Oh, one more thing I do is to keep up with my outline. When I start a new chapter, I look at what I already had written down (sometimes I find things I forgot about). I add any new bullets, because I may have brought up something in the previous chapter that I need to address further. I do a strikethru on any scenes I've already written. I refer to the outline a lot while I'm working on the chapter, and by the time I'm done, the outline reflects every scene in that chapter and an overall wordcount. In the end, I might need to go back and add a scene somewhere, or move some things around, and having an accurate, shorthand overview gives me insight into the overall structure of the story and makes it super-easy to figure out which chapter could handle an extra scene. (oh god. OH GOD. I document my own fanfic. throw me right in the garbage)

I really, really hope some of this was helpful! This probably sounds like a lot of work, but without this kind of structure, I feel really unmoored and it's easy to become depressed and overwhelmed. Doing it this way makes me feel like I know where I am in the journey and I'm able to feel concrete progress every week or two, which is really motivating for me. Good luck!

#writing advice #productivity advice #i am a very cool person and lots of fun at parties #this isn't true at all but i am a great co-worker and a champ at finishing things on deadline

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chaoticneutralwriter · 4 years

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Deleted Scene; Off-Chance Meeting

What if Jimin met....Jimin?

guardian demon!Jimin x reader

genre: fluff, romance, angst, comedy, supernatural

word count: 4.2k

Related works: See masterlist under guardian demon!Jimin

A/n: So this was like....a half developed scene that I was going to put in for Interlude: Second Best buuuuut I didn’t want to make the chapter too long because the main focus was guardian demon!Jimin’s POV from the events in the previous chapter. However! It’s been mentioned as a ‘what-if’ so I completed it as a fun deleted scene. Hope you like it and hope yall are doing okay! take care, be safe and I’ll hopefully see you soon again for another update, this time with story progression LOL

BTW! Thanks for the 1,026 follows!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖💖💖💖

Tag List: @cherryjiminiee @kokobaekkie @breathebangtan @itsadoozie @thatshylatinagirl @chiminieboi @azulamakesmeblank @sectumsemptae @awkwardwookie @aduky @poisonseashell @shortannoyingginger @caramelmac-chiato @sana-b @jiminstinct

Jimin’s game plan to blend in is quite simple because it really only consists of one step; grab a staff member so that he can duplicate the lanyard ID they have. Even though he promised to not use his powers to you for the most part, it doesn’t mean he hasn’t found ways to work around it. He easily locks onto a target — a male staff exiting the artist room to step out into the hallway Jimin’s in, presumably on a short break as he strides down to stop by a vending machine. The male staff has his head down, eyes glued to his phone for a while until finally, he takes a quick glance up to view the selection of snacks before ducking his head again, clearly in no rush at all.

Jimin’s lips quirk and he makes quick work at slipping closer, steps light and so undetectable that he may as well be a ghost rather than a demon. At the last minute, Jimin cloaks himself, sneaking up on the unsuspecting male just as he reaches into his back pocket to grab some change. The demon’s touch feels nothing more than a draft, fingers barely caressing the back of the colourful lanyard hanging around his neck but it’s all he needs. The male staff carries on, punching in the numbers and watches as the bag of chips falls into the slot below. Taking it, he walks away, none the wiser.

Jimin pays no mind to him anymore, focused on slipping the thin silver chain necklace out from under his shirt and with a soft blow of his breath, the silver chain morphs into the lanyard, a perfect copy. Normally, he would do without a need for something tangible to cast the illusion but this way, he wouldn’t have to use too much magic to keep it up — a weight to the illusion is more believable than simply thin air.

Satisfied, he lets the cloaking spell disperse, rolling his neck a little at the relief that he can finally walk around more freely without the worry of hiding or arousing suspicions.

“Now… where to go?” He mumbles quietly to himself, eyes darting before deciding that he should scope out the way to the area under the stage. Just as he rounds the corner though—

“Woah!”

Jimin’s fast reflexes has him jerking back in time before he collides into the other body. With a step back, his eyes immediately catch sight of the sparkly jacket and they widen almost simultaneously in realization.

Face to face with him was none other than his own mirror, Park Jimin of BTS, only he has honey blond hair and a glowing complexion.

“Ah, I’m really sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.” His eyes are a little wide, stormy grey contacts shining as he apologizes.

For a moment, he’s frozen, stuck rigid in place with shock and split second panic before realizing that he has the safety of his mouth mask and drawn up hood to protect his identity of being the idol’s face stealer. Also the fact that the idol has yet to pass out from shock at seeing his own clone or give any sort of huge reaction was a good indicator.

“A-Ah….” The demon’s voice catches in his throat, and he awkwardly coughs, embarrassed as he ducks his head and mutters gruffly in Korean, “No, it’s my mistake.”

The singer smiles amicably, teeth showing and gaze so warm and so friendly that the demon almost has trouble meeting it.

“Hey now, don’t worry! It’s nothing serious.” There’s a pause, a slight tilt of his honey blond head before those artificial stormy grey irises blink, brows furrowing. The demon starts to actually sweat, eyes refusing to meet as he unconsciously begins to lean back to put space in between. But there’s no escaping the curious gaze of the twenty-four year old singer. “Ah, I— I don’t mean to sound rude or offensive but…. I don’t believe I’ve seen you before?”

Oh shit, shit, shit, shit…

He swears his plan would’ve been completely foolproof if he hadn’t ran into the very person he’s going around parading as. The chances of the demon running into said idol was 1 in 200 and yet it’s as if fate had cursed him with the unwanted luck a fan could only dream of having. But there’s no time to curse heaven and fuck all because his mind begins to race with possibilities of escaping this situation. Maybe he could get away with enthralling the idol for a quick second, trick him into thinking this is all some sort of hallucination from being overworked and then when he’s all good and spaced out, the demon can make his escape. His fingers just about twitches when the singer’s eyes widen and his mouth opens, face alight with an epiphany.

“Are you perhaps new?”

….What?

A beat unknowingly passes between them, with the demon blinking owlishly at the young man, completely gripped in disbelief and the singer staring back expectantly.

 “Am I mistaken…?”

The hesitancy creeping into that question snaps the demon from his stupor and he finally blurts out, “No, I’m new.”

Relief washes over the idol’s handsome face (he’s never gonna get over how fucking trippy this is to watch), shoulders visibly losing some tension and the singer even places a hand over his chest.

“Ah, that would’ve been really bad — I usually am able to recognize everyone on the team.” His eyes creases again from the smile forming on his face. “Why haven’t we met yet, um….?”

“Ju—“ The demon stumbles on his words, thinking at the last second that your impromptu Korean name you had given him when he met Jaehee sounded too similar to the idol’s so his mind jumps to the next one he remembers off the top of his head. “— yeon….Kang Juyeon. This is my first day.”

Jimin the idol makes a noise of understanding, presumably taking his sloppy introduction as nerves in good strides. He inclines his head graciously in an almost small bow that catches the demon off-guard. “It’s nice to officially meet you Juyeon-ssi. I look forward to working with you.”

He bows robotically in return.

“Are you on break right now?” The young singer asks innocently.

“…Yes…” The answer comes out unsure, like he’s testing the waters and seeing where this could possibly lead — hopefully with the idol leaving him be and carrying on back to the artist room, surely much too busy to entertain a seemingly nervous new recruit. To his surprise though, the demon is proven wrong.

“Oh! I’m so sorry, I must be taking up your time. Have you gotten anything to drink or eat yet?”

“Well, no but—“

The idol’s mouth gapes open almost immediately, “Would you like to head over to the catering room now? We can grab something.”

The demon is baffled, to say the least; so taken aback by Jimin’s friendly disposition to someone who he only just met that even though he really shouldn’t be overstaying his welcome like this, a part of him would actually feel guilty for turning down the offer. He’s so glad he’s wearing a mask right now because then the idol wouldn’t have to see the borderline crazed smile slowly stretching over the demon’s lips, the disbelief too strong.

But looking at the original owner of the face he wore, seeing it completely reflect a drastically different personality than his own invokes something in him; a morbid curiosity taking hold and stoking the fire to a long buried question —

Who is Park Jimin?

Beyond the worldwide renown Korean idol and a pretty face with killer vocals and dancing, the demon knows very little about who this person is, this person whom you adore so much. What is it that drew you to him specifically amongst the other members. He highly doubts its looks alone (you’re definitely not the shallow type), or maybe even the amount of talent because from what he gathered, all the members were pretty much on par with each other in all departments.

So what made Jimin special?

He really shouldn’t follow this rabbit down the hole, but he’s a demon by nature and impulsivity is practically his middle name. Without another second thought, he agrees with a nod of his head, “Okay.”

Curiosity really should be a sin.

He gets a blinding smile in response, eyes disappearing and pearly teeth on display (he spies the slight crooked front tooth that somehow only seems to add to the singer’s charm rather than a flaw). They walk off towards the room that acts as a communal dining area for the staff and artists themselves, the large selection of hot foods lined up like a buffet self-serve while there are tables available for anyone who wants to sit down for their meal. There’s only a few staff members gathered there, each preoccupied with their phones or simply grabbing a quick bite to eat before rushing back to where they’re needed.

The singer walks in and of the few people that are hanging around, he inclines his head in greeting to them. The demon has no choice but to follow in order to not draw suspicions (even though he gets a few raised eyebrows from wearing a full hood and mask but is ultimately brushed off).

“There’s a lot of choices here so please help yourself. Don’t be shy.” Jimin gestures, grabbing a plate and going for one of the rolls of kimbap. Though the demon has no intention of eating anything — for obvious reasons, he still makes the effort to thoughtlessly pick out random food items to place on his plate for the sake of keeping up the facade. He gets as far as two scoops of sweet and sour pork before the young idol turns to him and his eyes dart to his modest portion.

“Is that all you’re going to eat?”

“Uh…Yes?”

That immediately draws out a noise of disapproval, handsome face pinching along to match the tone. “Ah, Juyeon-ssi; you need to eat to keep up your strength. You can’t hold back on something as important as that.” Before any words of protest can be formed, a kimbap roll is placed on the empty space of the demon’s plate.

And then another.

And then a spring roll.

And then a hefty scoop of black bean noodles and some rice.

It goes on until his plate is adequately full, the idol satisfied as they migrate over to an empty table. The demon takes a seat and he feels his lips quirk as he observes the fact that Jimin’s own plate only consisted of two kimbap rolls and a few pieces of fruit he’s currently nibbling on. The stark contrast and adamancy is already so telling of his character, sans personal dietary considerations.

“Has the job been hard so far?” The singer asks casually.

“Not particularly….”

“Ah, that’s good to hear. Have people been nice to you?”

“Uh…Yeah, I guess.”

He gets a nod of approval, and the demon vaguely likens the feeling of a mother asking their child if their first day of school went well (or if he’s being generous, an older brother). It’s strange experiencing something so familial yet coming from the idol, it all seems so natural as if they’ve known each other for years and not just in the span of less than an hour.

It’s quite the culture shock — something he admittedly doesn’t have a good grasp on and it’s that curiosity to know that has him daringly (or perhaps, no doubt to his colleagues, foolishly) diving deeper. The wooden chopsticks in his hand push around the food on his plate meaninglessly, a gesture meant to disguise the hidden agenda he has; dissecting the idol and seeing what makes him tick.

His lips instinctively quirk under his mask but he makes sure that it doesn’t translate in his gaze as his eyes focus on the idol.

“I’m sure your job is much more tiring.” He says, taking on a tentative tone, implicating for an open ended discussion.

The singer takes a pause, eyes wandering in thought before he sucks in a breath after some serious considerations, “I don’t really think my job is any harder than some of the other staff here…” He stops, as if collecting his thoughts again and then continues, “I think it’s thanks to everyone’s efforts that the members and I are able to do these show successfully and safely. If I were to really break things down…. I really only do a small part.”

“But there’s no point to a show if there’s no performers.”

There’s a hum in reply to his statement but after the idol swallows the strawberry he’s popped into his mouth, he says, “I can see how you would say that, but I think more importantly, there’s no point to a show without the fans.”

The demon doesn’t miss the gentle affection that slips through — that quiet, soft whisper that carries the words near the end, giving way to something much deeper. It’s something he’s seen before, reflected in himself, and it’s whenever his thoughts wander to you.

Fondness.

His chest gives a twinge at the memory, jaw clenching a little as if to physically repress the feelings that begin to stir.

“You don’t even know the fans….” It comes out more as a low murmur to himself, but the contempt underlying his tone seeps through all the same. It’s just…. How could the idol possibly share the same sentiment he has with you, someone who he’s actually spent time with and come to know all the little quirks to — what makes you happy, sad, laugh, the way you laugh, the little noises you make when you eat something you love, see you at your highest and lowest points, with a group of people (not even a single person) who he’s had less than ten seconds worth of interactions?

It’s far too superficial, too scripted and said too many times with no real meaning. He wants to scoff at how impractical it is.

“Maybe so, but it goes beyond that.” The familiar sound of the idol’s lilt halts the demon’s thoughts quite suddenly, still in that soft spoken way but there’s something else with it. A sureness — steady and unwavering, and just the barest hints of….passive-aggressiveness?

That gets a quirk in the eyebrow; so this kitten does have claws after all.

“There are times where I wonder why there are so many people who like us and support us the way they do.” The singer continues seriously, already getting lost in deep thought. “Probably because we work hard, but who doesn’t work hard? Others make good music and do their best too so why us? We try our best to communicate to our fans but everyone does too…..These sorts of things are something I often think about.”

A pause, as if to find the right words, “But whenever I read the fan’s letters or things they post on SNS to us, saying how much we’ve helped them with our songs when they’re going through a hard time, it makes me realize that we’re not so different. We all have flaws and maybe it’s because we’re not perfect that they like us. Starting off with nothing and then little by little, seeing more people coming to support us…. They’re the ones who put us on the stage, so I— We cherish them a lot. They give us energy and comfort us, and we do the same back, like a deep connection, an understanding.”

The young singer stops in pushing around the remaining strawberry on his plate, a ghost of a smile tugging on his lips, like he’s recalling a particularly pleasant memory. “So we want to give back by making good music and showing them our best. Ah, reminds of something really cool Namjoon-hyung said.” He takes the time to tilt his head, “He said how even if it’s just one person he could help, he’ll continue to keep trying. That really touched me, so even if we might not know them personally, they’re the ones who motivate us and makes all of this worth it.”

Once he finishes, the demon is left a little more than bewildered, overwhelmed in fact that all he could do was blink. Granted, it was a lot to take in, never having expected such an arduous confession but what’s even more baffling to him is the conviction the singer had saying all of it, so earnest in his words. Now, he’s no lie detector per se, but as a demon, he does have a more innate ability to pick up on cues and inflections that would give a person away, revealing their true nature. He’s used to it after all.

And then along comes Park Jimin.

This twenty-four some odd year old idol, thrusted into the cut-throat world that is the entertainment industry, young and bright-eyed, armed with nothing but potential, a good work ethic and a dream, yet comes out on the other side, a little bruised and scathed but otherwise, un-jaded; that young and bright-eyed innocence not diminished, instead it matured into something more resilient.

He can probably count on his finger how many people he can actually say that about. Hell, the only closest people that would qualify would be saints, and even that is debatable.

It’s....irritating because he’s faced with the fact that as much as he had wanted to dislike this person, he’s proven that he can’t.

A rush of air leaves his nose and he has to contain a rueful smile. “You’re a very admirable person Park Jimin-ssi. Not that many people keep to their beliefs so strongly like that.”

He gets a bashful giggle in return, light and melodic.

“Aish, what are you saying? I’m not all that impressive….I think I still have a lot to learn.” The singer almost whines from behind the back of his hand covering the open mouth smile he has. Once he calms, it softens. “All I really want is for the fans to remember BTS for our sincerity. I just hope that I’ve been able to help convey that so far.”

The demon lets out a breathy chuckle, finally getting up from his seat. He gazes down at this young man who’s face reflects his own yet wears it in such an entirely different way — glowing with a passion and radiance that is warm, sincere, kind, compassionate and loving.

Perhaps the way it’s meant to be worn.

And it’s with a bittersweet reluctance that the demon places a hand on the singer’s shoulder, giving it a gentle reassuring squeeze. “Keep doing what you’re doing and never lose sight of yourself. As long as you remember what you’re doing this for, the sincerity of your members and you will be conveyed.”

Stormy grey eyes widen a fraction, a little confused as they blink up at him, clearly not expecting such encouragements (honestly, he didn’t expect this either yet here he is).

“Wh— Um, I—…” The idol reaches a hand up to comb through his meticulously styled hair, tousling a few loose strands as slowly, the apples of his cheeks begin to dust in a pink hue and dark eyes can’t help but watch on in amusement. As if sensing the focus shifting to his quickly reddening face however, the young man lets out a sputter and lightly smacks the demon’s forearm, refusing to meet his gaze. “Ahh Juyeon-ssi! What’s with you saying that all of a sudden to me? You sound as if you’re way older than me when we’re probably friends in age!”

Friends…

“What makes you think that?”

“W-Well… I don’t know how to explain it but…. I feel a sense of familiarity with you when we met. Like, a vibe….” The sentence pewters out into a shy mumble, the tips of his ears matching his cheeks now before comically, grey orbs whip up, suddenly concerned. “Unless you’re not….?”

The snort that leaves the demon’s mouth is quickly covered by clearing his throat but he’s sure the restrained mirth still reaches his eyes as he assures, “No, we’re friends.”

He’s met with a brilliant grin, full of teeth and a twinkle in his gaze. “Oh thank goodness. I would’ve died on the spot out of embarrassment.”

He refrains from rolling his eyes if only to dismiss the overly-dramatic relief that overcame the poor young man. But regardless, it’s his cue to go — he's starting to feel a little too perturbed being near someone so good-natured. With a final pat to his shoulder, the demon begins to depart.

“It was nice talking to you Park Jimin-ssi but you’ll have to excuse me, I have to get going now.”

“O-Oh? Is it really that time? If that’s the case— Ya! Kang Juyeon-ssi! Did you even touch your food? You—!”

“Jimin-hyung!”

“Oh?” Jimin’s attention whips to the new voice that called him from the still full plate of food left on the table. His eyes immediately meet doe-eyed ones, usually dark as coal but are currently a more lighter coffee colour, bringing out more of the brown that’s hidden in its depths thanks to the contacts. The youngest member approaches him with long strides, the sequins on his own stage outfit glitter with each step.

“This is where you were? Should’ve told me you were hungry, we could’ve gone to snack together.”

“Ah, no I was just talking with Juyeon-ssi.”

“Juyeon? Who’s that?”

“Kang Juyeon; that person who was just leaving, you must’ve seen him on your way in.”

But that only gets a head tilt from Jungkook, who swivels his head back towards the entrance, “He doesn’t sound familiar and I didn’t see anyone leaving.”

“….Huh?” Equally confused, Jimin swerves around the tall form of Jungkook to get a look however, to his surprise, he doesn’t see anyone. Glancing around lets him know that at most, there was only three other people in the room, excluding him and Jungkook but they were all immersed on the couch in the far corner, away from the entryway. Does Juyeon walk that fast? “Aye, quit messing with me. He had on a face mask, around my height? With his hoodie pulled up; probably the only one here who does too.”

Jungkook shakes his head, genuinely clueless on who Jimin could possibly be referring to. “No, I swear I haven’t seen anyone around like that.”

The furrow in Jimin’s brows deepen, mouth falling open in disbelief. The scrunched up, troubled expression the older member makes was too good to pass up on teasing so Jungkook can’t help but to lean close, voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper.

“What? Were you speaking to a ghost this entire time hyung?”

“Aish! Don’t say that! That actually gave me chills!” Jimin scowls, smacking the youngest repeatedly on the arm and causing Jungkook to cackle and skip away from the assault.

“Anyways, Namjoon-hyung wants to go over the script again so I went to go find you.”

“Oh, okay. Let’s go then.”

Brushing down his jacket, Jimin gets up, taking both plates with him, discarding his own empty one while Jungkook gleefully takes the one Juyeon hadn’t touched. The two head out and begin to make their way back to the artist dressing room, with Jungkook talking around mouthfuls of food about what Jimin had apparently missed while he was away but all Jimin could think about was his meeting with Juyeon.

There’s no way he could’ve imagined it all in his head — he’s too young to be going senile. Plus, it felt too real for it to be some overworked hallucination (besides, he doesn’t feel that jet lagged). So there’s a perfectly, logical explanation for it. Yeah, he just…walks really fast.

“Jimin-hyung is here!” Jungkook calls out to the rest of the members. He gets a myriad of boisterous responses and greetings. The sound makes him inadvertently grin.

“Yeah, yeah I’m coming. I didn’t think you would miss me that badly; I was gone for ten minutes.”

Thoughts of his mysterious friend are pushed away for some other time but the wise words he’s been given remain at the forefront of Jimin’s mind. Perhaps the next time he runs into Juyeon, he’ll treat him to a drink or two during the celebratory dinners — get to know him better.

He’s not sure what it is about Juyeon that makes him want to befriend him so intently, like there’s something about him….

Something that’s a little melancholy….and maybe, he dare say, a little lonely.

But to the singer’s dismay, he never really did see him again.

#jimin x reader #jimin fanfic #park jimin fanfic #jimin insert reader #jimin insert fic #bts fanfic #jimin fluff #jimin imagines #park jimin fanfics #park jimin insert reader #jimin x insert reader #bts supernatural au #guardian demon!jimin #jimin scenario #park jimin scenarios #park jimin fluff #park jimin fics #jimin fic

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neo-atom-blog · 4 years

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((Um. Hi.

I’ve not touched this blog in a really long time; in fact, I came here today with the intent to delete it- except...

Looking back on it, while a lot of the art leaves... a little something to be desired, style-wise (I’m still terrible with consistency, just btw), a lot of it was just, comparatively, so clean and, honestly, a little bit impressive, compared to what I usually turn out.

I don’t know that I could ever return to where I left off- especially since the last update was on the laptop, which I have no means of recovering files from at this time, due to it running a different operating system- but, I kind of want to, like, leave this here? I don’t remember much of the details of this blog, anyhow. Maybe I’ll try again in the same thread, with a full reboot, same as last time. Who knows?

In any case, I think I’ll leave this old thing alone... for now.

TTFN- Tata for now.))

#OOC #mun post

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cyanidefilledcandy · 4 years

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An Update

So, I want to apologize to anyone who still pays attention to me on Tumblr.

This year has been....something to say the least and I just have been GONE mentally. I’m JUST NOW bouncing back from basically being a vegetable for the entirety of the year. Also, add to the fact that I’ve been especially busy the month of November, so I haven’t been very consistent on here.

So, a very very VERY big apology for those who sent me Asks that I responded late to or haven’t responded to at all. I’m so sorry if it seems like I’m ignoring you, because that’s not my intent. I usually just get busy and forget to answer or I legitimately can’t think of an answer to the question. (Mainly looking at you, @eene-fangirl :( )

But, like I said, I’m slowly bouncing back and hopefully can be at least a BIT more consistent in the coming year, even though I have goals outside of Tumblr. But, I at least hope to update more frequently. But, you can find me on Twitter at Candy_Cyanid. It’s where I update the most now. (Though, it’s probably worse than my Tumblr as far as content. lol ;P)

In other news, yesterday was my birthday. I’m 29...geez... lol

I didn’t make too much of a big deal out of it because I wasn’t really feeling up to it. Wasn’t necessarily depressed; just wasn’t in the mood to do a lot. I did take a three day break from social media, which was VERY nice. And I think I may make a habit of it on my days off, and maybe only respond to PMs. I didn’t get as much done project wise as I would’ve liked too, but I did make some new pendants. I wound up burning them unfortunately, but for having not done anything with clay in pretty much 4 years, I don’t think I did too bad. And I really like the designs, so I plan on remaking them.

Unfortunately, my plans to move have pretty much been put on seemingly perma hiatus. My truck (which I didn’t even WANT, btw) is just eating up ALL of my funds. I don’t make a lot of money anymore and pretty much half of my check goes to car payments and insurance and the other half goes to gas....literally. So, IDK... I REALLY don’t want to because it was part of the reason I was so mentally screwed up this year, but I may have to get a second job again if I want to leave even though I really feel I can’t handle the load mentally or physically. :/

So yeah....all in all, I’m doing better, but still have a ways to go. (Also, yes. I AM still a windbag. Sorry about it. :P)

#personal #update #apology

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pens-swords-stuff · 5 years

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How do I make meaningful connections with other writers here? I try starting conversations, commenting on posts, and involving myself in the community but I often don't get acknowledged and I feel like a weird outsider trying to insert themself into a group. I've been here quite a while now and followed a lot of your newbie advice (thanks btw) but I'm still totally by myself while newer blogs seem to be accepted into the community immediately. I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

You’ve sent this in on anonymous, my friend. I don’t know what you’re doing because I don’t know who you are or what your blog is, so I can’t really help you.

One thing that I think is important to note is that the Writeblrs that get the most interaction here do so because they’re reblogging and commenting on other people’s work. It’s best to be consistent about this as well, and pop into the notifications of some people a lot. People are busy, maybe they wanted to reply but it got lost in their notifications. Lots of things slip through the cracks and don’t get responded to despite people’s best intentions. So give people lots of opportunity to reply. It’s difficult to gain traction with your original posts if you don’t have a lot of followers, so it’s important to piggyback off of others for a bit.

And I also think that this community is a lot less clique-y than people think. Most people are just individuals with mutuals that they interact with as their posts come up on their dashboards. Don’t be intimidated by what you think might be an existing group! It’s probably not as big of a deal as you think it is!

I now have an updated FAQ and Ask Guidelines for Writing Advice, please check those out first if you have a writing advice question!

Ask Guidelines | FAQ | Advice Masterlist

#asks #writing #writeblr #writeblr community #writers of tumblr #undine answers stuff #undine gives advice #anonymous #Anonymous

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ether4life-blog · 5 years

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#ProgPoW Follow-Up: The Cost of ASIC Design

I was glad to see that IfDefElse published an interesting article “The Cost of ASIC Design” as a response to my previous article. However, I think IfDefElse are not very familiar with ASIC design and have made some inaccuracies in their article.

In their article, IfDefElse state that:

The hashrate of ProgPoW is determined by two factors: the compute core, as well as the memory bandwidth. This is why the variance between Ethash and ProgPoW, as shown below...

This is not true in ASICs. Although the math function and the merge function have been added into ProgPOW to improve the ratio of visiting computer core and memory in computation, these functions can be achieved by very low costs in ASIC chips. (see EIP 1057 (ProgPoW): Open Chip Design for 1% cost/power increase) As all we know that the performance of computing grows in accordance with Moore’s law, which states that the performance of computing will double every 18 months. However, memory access performance is far behind the developments in computing performance. So memory access performance becomes the bottleneck of the overall performance of the system. This is the so-called Memory Wall as shown in Figure 1.

In the ASIC chip, the computational part is very easy to resolve through design optimization. Whether it is Ethash or ProgPoW, bandwidth of memory access is the bottleneck (refer to EIP 1057 (ProgPoW): Open Chip Design for 1% cost/power increase). The performance of a GPU chip is also limited by the Memory Wall because GPUs are designed for general computing, and not specifically for Ethash or ProgPOW. Actually it is the original intention of Ethash algorithm to limit the computing power by the Memory Wall problem.

In their article, IfDefElse further states that:

The only similarity between ProgPoW and Ethash is the usage of the DAG in global memory. From a computation perspective, Ethash only requires a fixed keccak_f1600 core, and a modulo function. ProgPoW, on the other hand, requires the ability to execute a 16-lane wide sequence of random math, while accessing a high-bandwidth L1 cache. Designing a compute core that can execute the ProgPoW math sequence is significant more difficult than implementing a fixed-function hash like keccak.

From the perspective of an IC engineer, the circuit implementation of a fixed algorithm is the easiest circuit to design. There is no requirement for interaction between hardware and software, no limitation of compatibility or generalization for various computes. The functions in both Ethash and ProgPOW can be simply mapped to a pipelined circuit, with high performance. The logic circuit design can be completed in 2 weeks. However, the GPU is a general-purpose chip that requires interaction between software and hardware, needs to guarantee generalization, requires instruction design, needs architecture design, needs to build a model, etc. It is impossible to complete the design for a GPU chip model within half a year. As for The original Ethash ASICs of Innosilicon or Bitmain, or likely even Linzhi, are built with a successful framework. I believe that it would take only weeks for their ASIC designers to update their Ethash ASIC frameworks for ProgPoW. The design flow, packaging, test boards, and computing boards can all be reused. So it’s quite easy for them to update from Ethash to ProgPoW.

In their article, IfDefElse state that:

First, having 2x the bandwidth will require 2x the compute, so it’s linear scaling, rather than an advantage.

As described earlier in this article, ASICs and GPUs are different. Memory bandwidth, instead of the computing part, is the performance bottleneck for ASICs. However, for GDDR6, even with 8GB devices, an ASIC has a 4x performance advantage over the NV RTX1060, as shown in Table 1.

In their article, IfDefElse state that:

For a chip that has a single functional unit, a smaller die area will be higher yielding than a large die area. That’s not true for modern GPUs. GPU’s today are nearly arbitrarily binnable or recoverable, with a ton of tiny replicated units ignored on defect. As long as each binnable functional unit is small, then the chip yield can be nearly as high — or even higher — than a smaller chip with bigger, functional blocks.

IfDefElse’s above statements is not accurate. Although a large chip with redundant design can repair some chips and improve the yield, only a few of these second grade chips can be saved. Redundancy and repairing are usually for the SRAM, which has simple logical function and repeating cells in structure. For the computing logic units, the circuit is not as simple as SRAM. Adding redundant design means adding redundancy SM cores or something like that. These redundancies will inevitably increase the area of the silicon, thereby increasing the cost. For SRAM, we know that the cost of the redundancy is typically increased by 10%. And not all failures can be fixed by redundant cores. Only pre-calculated failures can be fixed by redundancy logics. BTW, estimating a chip cost from chip area is a basic skill of an ASIC engineer. In Table 1, the cost of GPU cards are estimated based on the silicon area of the chips. The cost of the GPU chips and the price of the corresponding graphics cards are shown in Table 1 and Figure 2. It can be seen that the cost and price are correlated.

In their article, IfDefElse state that:

Low voltage designs can work when the chip consist of only compute, such as a SHA256d ASIC. Integrating other elements like the SRAM (required for ProgPoW data caching), is extremely difficult or impossible to make functional at low voltages.

This, too, is inaccurate. The circuit structure of the SRAM is shown in Figure 3. It consists of two parts: Bit Array and peripheral circuit. The working voltage of Bit Array can be reduced to 0.55v but still it only accounts for 10% of the total SRAM energy consumption. The peripheral logic operating voltage can be reduced to 0.4V, and it accounts for 90% of the SRAM energy consumption. Thus, in an ASIC chip, the total reduction in power consumption of the entire SRAM is compatible with the power saved. Therefore, ASIC chips that implement ProgPoW acceleration can significantly reduce power consumption by reducing the voltage. This results in a 4x advantage in terms of energy efficiency over a GPU for ProgPoW, as described in my previous article.

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