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#i posted this last night at 1am and fucked up so we don’t talk about it!
promniight · 1 year
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out of your friends which one are you!
let’s pretend i didn’t fuck up last night and acknowledge that they make these little blonde europeans in a factory
[edit]: fixed the tagging sleep deprivation got my ass and made me tag croissant instead of baguette
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trippinsorrows · 9 days
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with me + part four
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authors note: the love and response to this story continues to absolutely floor me. you guys are all so sweet! i was nervous about posting, but everyone has made me feel so happy that i did, so thank you!
couple of hints about things sprinkled through this one. the more i write, the more things are getting fleshed out, so idk how many parts this will be atp, nothing too crazy though!!!
also, some tags don't seem to work for some reason, like when i type it, the hyperlink doesn't appear so super sorry to those impacted by that!!!
warnings: angst, fluff, language, suggestive content
song inspo: with me by destiny’s child
word count: 5.8k
taglist: @pixiedust4000 @southerngirl41 @yolobloggers @msbigredmachine @wonderingfashion @shayaaaaaaa @usoholic @brokenglassslippers @gators-aid @dersha89 @southerngirl41 @empressdede
You couldn't eat. 
Couldn't sleep.
Could barely think straight.
All that consumed you, ate at you, gnawed at your sanity was one thought and one thought alone.
He wanted to take her from you. 
Joe wanted to take your daughter from you, your four year old daughter who still couldn't even go to sleep at night unless she got to see or speak to you.
The daughter who he'd only known existed just recently but was seemingly set on ripping away from you.
That thought destroyed you, made you raw from blistering agony at just the idea of not having Callie with you full time. It destroyed you to the point that you decided to throw some clothes on, hop in your car, and set your google maps for the hotel you knew he’d be staying at. Damn the fact that it was the middle of the night or that you were stupid as hell for being in that situation in the first place. None of that mattered. 
You needed to talk to him, and you needed to talk to him now. 
Joe opens the door with a forceful swing, looking as irritated and disheveled as you’d expect one to look at nearly 1am in the morning. However, when his eyes land on you, confusion meshes with irritation. “Y/N?”
“Hi.” It’s said in a breathy tone. You're struggling to remember the script you rehearsed the whole drive there. “I’m sorry. I know it’s late—”
“What the..….” He sighs heavily and steps aside, motioning for you to come in. “Get in here.”
You don’t need to be told twice, looking around the hotel room that looks so plain and undeserving of someone with Joe’s stature. But, you also know this area isn’t exactly saturated with 5 star hotels, far from it. This is probably the most elite one he could find with such short notice, and it’s not bad at all, just….basic.
He clears his throat, and you return your attention to the man who you just realized is also shirtless. If not for the pending mental breakdown you’re fighting to keep at bay, it would be extremely distracting. Joe is a lot of things, and fine as hell is at the top of that list.
“What are you doing here, Y/N?” He sounds exhausted, and you can’t tell if it’s from the argument earlier that day or being woken up in the middle of the night. Probably both. 
“I just—I need to talk to you.”
“Now?” 
Nodding, you continue. “I know….I know I messed up, okay? I should have told you, but I just—I need you to look at it from my perspective. I need you to just hear me out, and if—if you still feel the same way, then–then I’ll have to deal with that….but please.” 
He’s leaning back against the dresser, arms crossed, taking time to answer as he weighs your offer. Finally, he concedes, “you came all the way over here. I’m not just gonna send you away.”
You’re thankful for him being willing to at least hear some of what you have to say. “Callie.....she was conceived the last time we were together.” Not sure if that part was necessary or the best way to start out, you quickly move on to the next point. “I didn’t find out I was pregnant until two months later. And on top of not knowing what the fuck to feel, I barely knew what to do. I was pregnant by a married man that I’d been sleeping with for three years. A married, famous man at that. Who I finally decided I needed to move on from.” 
Revisiting this is harder than you expected, harder than when you rehearsed it on your drive here. “I was scared, Joe, okay? I was scared, so I—I did what I thought was best at that time, and clearly it was wrong. I 100% own up to that, and you get to be angry with me, but you don’t get to let that anger influence your decision making, because it is.” 
This is the part you debated so deeply on whether to say or not say, to potentially poke the already irate bear. But, you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t speak up for yourself and your daughter. “You want a legal custody arrangement, and I understand why, but—Joe, your name isn’t even on her birth certificate, but to tell you the truth…..I wanted it to be. I did.” Whether he believes you or not is on him, but it’s true. Because while he wasn't present in her life, he was still her father. Nothing would change that. “They wouldn’t do it without you present and without a paternity test—”
“I could have been there,” he interrupts, sounding more hurt than anything. “I should have been there.” 
“You’re right, but you weren’t, and I’m sorry for that too. I’m not trying to make any excuses here, just lay out facts. And the fact is that you can get a paternity test, you can establish paternity, and you can try to secure joint custody, but we both know there’s no way you can take her on. You work nonstop, Joe, and she can’t be on the road like that. She’s four for fucks sake. Calista needs stability, and she has that with me. You know I’m right.”
And you can see that he sees you’re right, the wheels turning in his head as he takes in your sound predictions.
“And I know you don’t right now, and that’s okay, but I am asking you to please trust me enough to know that I will not get in the way of you getting to know Calista. Trust that I only want what’s best for her, I’ve only ever wanted what was best for her.”
“Why should I?” Despite his words, you can see and hear the crumbling of his defenses, of the brick and mortar wall he'd erected earlier during the first round of this conversation. “What’s different now?”
“Because she asked about you.” This is the part that crushes you the most, that makes you wonder if you’ll ever be able to forgive yourself for even putting her in that situation. “Because she thinks you’re not in her life because she’s not a good girl, and I will not have my child grow up thinking she wasn’t good enough for her father to want to be in her life.”
You won’t let her grow up like you.
Period.
Having this discussion, saying these things aloud, you’re slowly starting to recognize how some of your own unaddressed issues have contributed to this situation. How your refusal to confront buried trauma has bled into another generation. It’s…..uncomfortable, to say the least.
And something you definitely need to revisit, probably sooner rather than later. Just…not right now. 
You’ve got to sort this through first.
It’s after a few minutes of silence that he finally speaks, voice surprisingly calm. “You’re right.” You let out a deep breath, nearly falling back at his words. You knew he was wavering but not to the point where he would yield. “I know….I know our situation is complicated, and I’m sorry for being so cold with you. I just—fuck, I don’t know how to process all of this.”
You cross your arms over your chest. “Neither do I, but we can figure it out, because we can’t…..we can’t put her through a custody battle. I won’t do that.” Despite your very valid facts, you also recognize that while he probably wouldn’t win, he has access to the best legal team money can buy and would outlast you in court by miles. 
You won’t say it aloud, not even sure if you can, but you’d soon rather concede than put her through that. You’d give him whatever he asked for if it meant sparing her from that trauma. 
It’s a far cry from your stance hours earlier, but time and actually thinking things through made you realize the pain you’d experience at having Callie taken from you would be nothing compared to what that experience would do to her. You know custody disputes can be long and nasty, and though she was still young, you didn’t want to find out if they would question her. 
You’d sacrifice your soul and surrender. 
You loved her enough to let her go.
“You’re right.” He repeats himself, even and calm. It’s such a stark difference for both of you compared to the blowup from earlier. There’s actual communication occurring, talking with each other, instead of at each other. Listening to hear, not to react. “I—I couldn’t do that to you. I spoke out of anger. My schedule is crazy and she needs stability. You give her that.”
There’s an insurmountable amount of relief that washes over you at his words. It’s night and day from the angry—though rightfully—man that stood before you earlier today. And you couldn’t be more grateful. 
“Thank you.” There aren’t enough words to adequately express the depth of your gratitude. Joe is well within his right to be upset, and like you said, you’ll take whatever that is, so long as the both of you can agree that Callie being with you is for the best. For her, but for you too. You won’t deny that. Your daughter is your life, and the thought of being without her, even for a period of time makes you sick to your stomach. “I–” You wipe your eyes, completely unaware that you’d been crying at one point, the tears starting to dry up. “I’m taking off work tomorrow and keeping her home. You…you can come over once I pick her up from Mariah's."
His eyes light up with appreciation that matches your own for his willingness to look past his feelings to do what’s best for your child. “Yeah?”
You offer a small smile. “I’ll probably get her around 10 and text you when you can head over.”
He nods, and the excitement in his expression warms you. It’s so strange how you can go through so many emotions in such a short time regarding the man in front of you. He always has been able to evoke things out of you that no one else could.
“Thank you, Y/N.”
The way he takes you in, assessing you, it makes you shift your weight from one foot to another. Your hoodie suddenly feels too heavy, warmth climbing up to your cheeks. “I—” You gesture to the door with your thumb. “I should head out.” 
It’s when you turn to leave that he grabs your wrist to stop you. 
“Where are you going?”
Your brow lifts at his tone and words, confused by the quick change and his hand on your arm. “Umm, home?” 
“Like hell you are.” His dismissal is firm and final as he informs, “you'll crash here tonight.” Your face must be painted in defiance, because he explains, “it's almost 2 in the morning, and you look exhausted. I'm not letting you get on the road. Anything could happen.”
“Joe—”
He lifts his hand, silencing you as he points to the middle of the room. “You can take the bed. It's uncomfortable anyway.”
Ironically, a small yawn escapes, further proving his point. You are exhausted, in several different ways. The idea of driving back home right now is not nearly as appealing as sleeping off the day's events. “Okay.” Remembering his comment, you add, “you could have picked one of those fancy hotels ya'll stay in, you know.”
“I don't think there's anything ‘fancy’ within 30 miles of here.” He's not entirely wrong, the town's local steakhouse is considered the definition of fine dining and hotspot for special occasions. 
“There were once rumors of a Hilton being built.”
He looks almost hopeful. “When was that?”
You bite down on your lip. “When I was in middle school.” A small laugh escapes at his look of exasperation. 
“You should take the bed. It's gotta be more comfortable than the alternative.” Truly, because the idea of Joe's big ass trying to sleep on a damn fold out sofa is both hilarious and tragic. “I just need a shirt.”
He looks at you. “A shirt?”
“Yeah.”
“Because…..”
Rolling your eyes, you tug at your old college hoodie. “I can't sleep in this. It's uncomfortable as hell. I dress light at night. You know—” And you stop yourself, because he shouldn’t remember that you always sleep in either a big shirt or thin top and shorts, never more, oftentimes nothing at all when he was in town.
For obvious reasons.
You’re grateful when he turns away and digs through his bag, probably the only one he took with him. He always traveled lightly. He comes back, reaching you one of his black t-shirts. 
“Thanks.” Accepting the item, you walk over to the bathroom, closing the door behind you. Standing in the mirror, you take in your appearance. Joe was being nice by saying you look exhausted, cause you look like shit, every bit of the days events, loud and blaring. Blowing out a breath, you start removing your clothes but pause when you go to remove your bra.
Is that….is that too much? You haven’t slept in a bra in years. Not since puberty randomly hit you over the summer between freshman and sophomore year, where you went from a modest A cup to a whopping D. And post Callie body definitely wasn’t a D anymore. It just seems….it seems indecorous. 
Deciding to go with safe instead of sorry, you swallow your discomfort and keep your bra on. With the hair tie on your wrist, you do your best to pineapple your hair, knowing good and well it’ll be frizzfest when you wake up but not really caring. 
Another yawn leaves your mouth as you walk out the bathroom only to turn into a scowl as you find Joe sitting on the sofa on his phone.
If it wasn’t so late and you weren’t so tired, you’d argue with him why it’s stupid of you to take the bed. He’s at least a foot taller than you. But, you don’t have it in you so just mutter “stubborn asshole,” place your folded clothes on the dresser, and climb into the bed. 
You double check your alarm is still set for the right time and lean across the bed to place it on the nightstand. There’s a comfortable silence between the two of you for a couple of minutes, your eyes closing as you try to sleep, even if for a couple of hours before you have to get back on the road. 
“What is she like?”
Your eyes open at his question, unexpected but understood. You think about it, wondering how to answer, how to explain all of the wonderful things that is your child. Finally, you settle on an answer, soft and honest. 
“You'll find out for yourself tomorrow.” And turning on your side, you murmur, “goodnight, Joe.”
He doesn’t say anything after that.
But while you sleep with the hope of believing that this can be worked out between the two of you, Joe lies awake, taking his turn with mind running a mile a minute.
He knew this would be difficult, knew it was going to get ugly to some extent, but what he didn’t expect was how impacted he'd be by seeing you again.
There was a stark difference between seeing you in photos and seeing you in person. His anger at the situation helped him to not react as strongly, but not as much as he liked or needed it to.
Because regardless of all his outrage, he’d missed you.
Even with your deception, with your deceit and all of his confusing emotions toward you in this whole situation, he missed you. 
Joe might not be ready to admit it aloud, but he’s never gotten over you. And not for lack of trying. He’d had a period where he tried to fuck away his feelings, tried to busy himself in between the legs of other women, his favorite distraction when he was in his twenties. Tried to remind himself that it was never meant to turn into anything anyway, that it wasn’t a big deal. But his efforts were fruitless and a waste of time.
He cared about you, he cared about you, arguably, more than he’d ever cared about a woman. Even….even Jadah.
The night you ended things was still a sore spot for him, still something he plays over in his head trying to make sense of. On the surface level, it’s pretty plain and simple. You wanted more, he couldn’t give it to you, so you moved on. 1+1. He was legally married for fucks sake. He couldn’t blame you for wanting more, but there was also a part of him that wondered why you didn’t just ask him for more.
Then again, that went both ways. Why didn’t he ask you for more?
It’s easy to say it was because of Jadah, because of his marriage, and that was both true and untrue. On his part, anyway. Divorce was easy in name but far from it in every other area. And for him, meant being forced to confront demons he tried his best to keep at bay. Up until two months ago, at least
Joe closes his eyes. This is all too much. 
He came here ready to confront you, and he had, in fucked up way, even if partially deserved. He came here to meet his daughter, to begin to form a bond with her, and he will do that. He just has to push the complicated feelings for you to the side and place them on the backburner until he can sort through that mess.
Calista is his priority right now. Whatever this is between you and him can be figured out later.
Hopefully. 
________
“She can be shy until she gets to know you.”
The day seems to have escaped you, getting on the road early in the morning to drive back and prepare to pick up Callie. She’s thrilled to see you, and vice versa. The two of you spend the beginning of the morning together, stopping at a local diner to share a breakfast before heading back to your apartment. You spend a little more time together, one on one, before texting Joe to head over, staying true to your word. 
Especially since he informed you that he had to fly out tomorrow morning. You expected as such, knowing he’d probably already been gone longer than higher ups liked. He could only push the limits so much. 
You don’t even have to be looking at him to know he’s nervous, an understandable but strange thing. Weird almost. Joe’s a lot of things, but nervous has never been one of them. “But once she gets comfortable, she won’t shut up.” That makes him smile, and you’re grateful for that.  Sure enough, you find Callie in her playroom, which used to be your office space, but the more spoiled she became from your mom, the more you realized her room was too small for all of her stuff. “Hey, Callie Bear.”
Callie looks up, smile bright as she runs over to you. You lean down to meet her hug. She gives the best, loving hugs. “I’m making you something, mommy.”
You gasp. “You are? Well, I can’t wait to see it.”
“It’s a surprise, so no peeking!” She lifts her little finger, wagging it in your face. Laughing, you nod and push back some of her curls. Callie’s eyes then land on Joe’s massive frame standing near the doorway, silently observing. You can see the emotions so clearly on his face: surprise, shock, happiness.
Callie’s smile dims as she moves closer to you, holding you close, her stranger danger kicking in. A small part of you is grateful that even at almost five, she knows to be cautious. Then there’s the other part of you that’s saddened at the fact that the “stranger” she’s cautious of is her own father. “Baby, this is….this is….”
“I’m Joe,” he finishes for you, and you’re both grateful and annoyed. Conflicted because a small part of you wanted to be the one to tell her, but also grateful he ironically took that responsibility off of you. “I’m an old friend of your mom’s.”
Welp.
That’s not….that’s not what you expected him to say, not what you two discussed. It wasn’t explicitly stated, but you were under the impression that they would tell her the truth. His statement isn’t exactly a lie, you did once consider Joe to be a friend, much more than that, but still. Joe’s role in Callie’s life is significantly more than that. 
This seems to ebb away some of Callie’s caution as she asks, “really?” Her eyes fall on you, almost looking for approval. With a tight smile, you nod, giving her the relief she needs to loosen her hold on you. “Do you like Disney?” That causes you to genuinely laugh, something your sweet child definitely inherited from both you and your mom was a love of Disney. 
“I do,” he answers, and you pause. Does he really? Perhaps. Regardless, it’s a smart answer for your Disney loving child. “Do you?”
Callie nods happily, grabbing your arm and twisting it to show the ‘remember who you are’ tattoo on your wrist. “Mommy and grandma have Disney tattoos, and mommy’s gonna get a Moana one for me!”
“Really?” Joe, now crouched down to be at her eye level, sounds genuinely interested, and maybe he is. Callie is impressively charismatic at only four. She’s also his daughter who he’s wanting to develop a relationship with, so it’s not far-fetched that she could be talking to him about the rate at which grass grows, and he would entertain it like he was watching a 49ers game. “You like Moana?”
Is water wet? “She’s the bestest! Right, mommy?” 
You chuckle, fixing her shirt. “She watches it almost every day.” You always found it interesting, ironic even, that your daughter instantly gravitated to Moana, unaware that the voice of freaking Maui is her cousin, that she too had pacific islander ancestry. Through her dad. The dad you kept from her. 
“You know I don’t know if I’ve seen that one—”
Callie’s mouth drops open as she looks at you, “mommy, can we watch it? Please? Please? Pleeeeaaassseeee?”
“Okay, okay, okay,” you relent after pretending to think about it. You like to limit her screentime to two hours, and even though she already watched The Princess and the Frog earlier for the 97th time this month, there was no way you were not gonna allow this bonding opportunity. 
Squealing, Callie surprises you by breaking away and moving over to Joe, reaching for his hand. “Let’s go, Joe!” She pulls on the sleeve of his hoodie, probably to lead him into the living room where Disney Plus is signed in. 
Alone in her playroom, you run over what just happened. You thought you would tell her the truth, tell her that this is the father she was asking about, the one she thought didn’t want her when in actuality, he wanted to know everything there was to know about her.
And for a second, you get pissed off. Why wasn’t Joe honest with her? Isn’t this what he wanted? To be in her life. It’s confusing. He is confusing. But….you try to give him the benefit of the doubt, certain that he must have some reason behind his actions. You just hope they’re damn good reasons.
“Mommy!” You know that tone of hers, the tone that tells you a request is to follow. 
You shout back, “yes?”
“Joe likes popcorn too! Can we have some?”
You laugh and shake your head, shouting out an ‘okay’. Walking out of the room and into the living room, you find Callie near the TV, arm outstretched as she explains every detail of Moana, even the most obvious ones. But, Joe is sitting on the sofa, watching and listening intently. His smile is stapled. 
He looks…..he looks so happy.
Moving into the kitchen, you move around quietly to not interrupt and to get their popcorn made.
Waiting for the popcorn to finish, you hear Callie ‘whisper’ to Joe, “Mommy can’t cook, but she makes good snacks.”
Amid his laughter, you walk near the living room, hands on her hips. “I heard that, little ms. ma’am.”
“That’s what Grandma says,” Callie defends with a shrug of her little shoulders. “She says mommy is pretty and smart and funny, but she burns water.” She looks off, confused, as if it’s finally registering to her that that doesn’t make sense. “Mommy, how do you burn water?”
Joe is on the sofa, hand over his mouth, fighting for his life. You also can’t help but laugh at the absolutely serious look on her face. “Finish your movie.” 
The microwave dings, so you grab two bowls and fill them up equally. Delivering them to both, you place hers on the coffee table as she’s back to narrating. “Popcorn, as requested.”
“Thank you.” Her eyes go wide with excitement as she suddenly asks, “will you watch it with us?”
Damn. You had a feeling she would ask but was hoping she wouldn’t. Disappointing her twice in one weekend felt criminal. “Callie, I'm super behind with work.”
“Pleeeeasssseeee.” She starts with the begging again and then looks at Joe to inform him, “mommy’s a teacher. Do you have a job?”
Joe chuckles. “I do.”
“What do you do?” She asks in a sing-song tone. You give him that ‘I told you she never shuts up’ look. 
“I’m a professional wrestler.”
She’s clearly intrigued, asking, “are you actually good?”
“Callie!” This little girl and her lack of filter sometimes never ceases to amaze you. Your mom swears up and down it’s your payback from how blunt you were as a child. 
You’re starting to believe it.
Joe gives a shrug, clearly loving every bit of this. You can tell he wants her to keep the questions coming. He’ll answer em’ all if it means getting to spend time with her. “I’m alright.”
At that, you give him a look and crouch down to her level. “He’s very good.” You take the remote and quickly pause the TV, adding on, “matter of fact, he’s the universal undisputed champion.” Joe gives you a look, and you can tell he’s surprised by you knowing this piece of information.
You don’t watch wrestling as much as you used to, partially due to what happened between the two of you, mostly because you don’t have the time, but even non-wrestling people know about Roman Reigns and his current, historic title reign. You’re not sure if you’d feel entirely comfortable saying it to him, but you’re massively proud of Joe and all he’s accomplished. You always knew he could do it.
Her eyes widen with excitement and curiosity as she looks at Joe for clarification. “Really?”
“That is true.” 
Head tilted, she moves away from you and climbs on the sofa to sit next to him. Her little legs crossed over as she continues with the questions. “What does undis—undis—”
He helps her out, also angling his body more toward her. “Undisputed?” 
“Yeah! What does that mean?”
You can see he’s taking a minute to decide how to answer. “It means I don’t lose. Ever.”
“Whoooaaaa,” she breathes, obviously impressed. “You must eat a lot of veggies. I don’t like them, but mommy says they make you big and strong.”
“Your mom is right,” he agrees and looks her over. “You’re a very smart little girl. How old are you again? Like 15?”
“No, I’m four!” She giggles and lifts up four fingers. “But, I’ll be five on May 19th!”
His gaze softens. “Your birthday is in May?” She nods, happily. His smile is warm, emotional. “So is mine.”
You still for a moment. You hadn’t even thought about that, that her birthday was just days away from his. There’s something strangely sweet and moving about this fact, both to you and definitely to him.
“Really?” 
And that’s how it plays out for the rest of the day, a combination of Callie’s incessant questions, intermittent viewing of Moana and parts of Encanto. Lunch and dinner sprinkled somewhere in between. You’re even able to sneak off to do your lesson planning, Callie more than fine with just Joe to entertain her.
It warms your heart to see them connect almost instantaneously.
It’s why you wait as long as you can to interrupt, never wanting to do so, to invade their moment. But, you also know your daughter, know that she needs a certain amount of sleep to function the next day. And when you check in on them and catch her yawning, you know it’s unfortunately that time.
Sighing, you enter the living room with your arms crossed. “Callie Bear, it’s time to start getting ready for bed, mamas.”
“Nooo.” She whines. “I’m not tired.” Her groggy voice and scowl would indicate otherwise. 
“Of course, you’re not.” You bend down in front of her and reach for her hand. “Come on, we gotta tell Joe bye. He’s gotta get back to his hotel.” Despite her obvious objections, she climbs off the sofa and accepts your hand but not before looking at him. 
“Will you come over again tomorrow?” She asks with hopeful eyes and a voice of excitement, both things that make being honest with her that much harder.
He obviously doesn’t want to give her the truth, but it’s better than the alternative. With a frown, he answers, “I wish….but I’ve gotta get back to work tomorrow, Callie.”
Her smile drops, and sadness arises. “Why? Do you have to go?” Her quiet voice is comprised of disappointment and despondency. You can tell it hurts him. Her hope is dashed, replaced with sadness. “When will you come back?”
“As soon as he can.” You jump in to assist, hating the way he looks so devastated not having a specific date for her. Truth be told, you wouldn’t be surprised if he won’t be able to get away for another few weeks, if not more. “And you know what, you can use my iPad to Facetime him when he’s available anytime you want.”
Her eyes light up. “Really?” 
“Of course,” he assures. He reaches to push some hair out of her face. “I’ll call you whenever I can.”
She gives him a small smile. “You promise?” 
Joe swallows. “I promise, sweetheart.” 
Pleased and obviously ecstatic at this information, she surprises the both of you by tearing her hand from you to throw her little arms around him for an unexpected hug. You’re not sure why, but the sight makes your eyes water. His eyes close as he gently wraps his arms around her as well. You look away, almost uncomfortable interrupting this moment between the two of them.
When she pulls away, you swear you see disappointment reappear in his eyes. “Bye, Joe.” 
She returns to your side, and you gently direct her, “go put on your jammies and pick out a book. I’ll be right there in a few minutes, okay?” 
“Okay, mommy.” Without protest, she turns and heads back to her room. When it’s just the two of you, you turn to him, “she really likes you.” It feels silly saying such a thing. He’s her father. She should like him. She should love him.
But you also know better than anyone that being someone’s biological parent doesn’t automatically make them a parent. 
“That’s why you didn’t tell her, isn’t it? You want to gain her friendship first.” In watching and participating in the interaction between them, it dawned on you just why he didn’t tell her right away. Joe wanted to first establish a baseline with Callie, wanted her to get to know him just for him, to bond with him not because he was her dad, but because she wanted to. 
And clearly….clearly it worked. 
“She’s amazing,” he whispers. You see he’s still caught up in the emotion of it all, meeting his daughter for the first time, connecting with her as quickly and easily as he has.
“She is,” you agree, suddenly remembering why you’d dismissed Callie. “I–I uhh, I have something for you.” Standing back up—your knees were gonna hate you tomorrow—you pull the thumbdrive out of the back pocket of your jeans. He also stands with you. “I was that new mom who was intent on documenting every single thing my kid did, and I’m kinda glad I did now.” You reach and drop it in his open palm. “I got everything on video. Her first word, first time crawling, first time walking….all of it.” Suddenly uncomfortable with his silence, you add on, “I know it’s not the same as being there, but—”
“Thank you.” he interrupts in a quiet voice, immensely grateful to you at this moment. “Thank you, Y/N.” 
Emotion seems to be the keyword of the day, because yours are also all over the place, for a variety of reasons. It’s an experience that’s both overwhelming and confusing, but also….nice? You can’t necessarily describe it, but there’s something comforting about Joe having a role in Callie’s life.
But that doesn’t equate with your decision to not tell him about her in the first place, hence why you’re a hot ass, confused mess.
He’s making you feel things again, and you don’t like it. 
“I know getting back here won’t be easy, especially with the holidays rolling around. But, whenever you can come, you’re welcome. I mean it.” Thanksgiving is less than 3 weeks away. You’re highly doubtful he’ll be touching down before then. “Christmas is her favorite holiday. I know she’d love to have you here for that.”
“I’ll be back before Christmas and for Christmas.” You don’t know how, but you do know he’s convinced of it, and you don’t put it past him. He seems entirely determined. 
“Okay.” You walk him to the door, unsure why your bodies being so close to each other is an uncomfortable yet pleasing feeling. “Oh,” you suddenly remember something. “You need to make a Snapchat account.”
He scowls almost instantly. “A what?” A small laugh escapes you at his instant disgust. “I’m too old for that shit.”
“We both are, but it’s an easy way for me to share Callie and all her randomness with people. Make it and send me the username. I’ll add you.” It seems all it takes is for you to mention Callie, and he’s sold. He nods in agreement, all distaste washed away with the eagerness of receiving photos and videos of Callie on the regular. You keep your hand on the door, chewing on your lip, murmuring, “Goodnight, Joe.” 
He gives you a look, something unspoken in his eyes. “Goodnight, Y/N.” 
Closing the door behind you, you lock it and take a deep breath, unsure why your stomach is in knots. Not from anxiety or fear but happiness. 
You’re happy to have Joe back in your life, even with all of the bullshit that’s transpired in this single day. There’s something relieving about having him around, and you know it’s for Callie. It needs to be just for Callie, because what you can never do again is allow yourself to fall back into that situation. 
No matter how badly your heart and your head are clashing right now.
No matter how much you're starting to wonder if your heart ever really left that situation.
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heyitssashag · 5 months
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I got my lab results today and my tumour markers dropped 14 points. (It’s a Christmas miracle! lol) They’ve escalated every month since July so to see a sudden drop was weird. I have no idea why. I could theorize but I’m just going to take it as a win and move along.
Last weekend was the Christmas dinner book club meeting. It was so much fun. I haven’t laughed that hard for a long time. We did a gift exchange. We’re not really supposed to spend money on it - it’s just for fun. It could have been anything. I ended up getting a sweary colouring book off of Amazon for $7. The lady who got my gift is in her mid-70’s and when she read the cover “You are Fucking Beautiful”, everyone started to howl. She just ran with it and read all the other pages. It’s so funny to see our “elders” swear like a trucker. lol. (When my 94-year-old Oma talks about someone being an “asshole” I can’t help but chuckle.)
Anyway, it’s been a busy few weeks and I’m wiped out. I think I’ve been dealing with allergies which doesn’t help my energy. They’ve been coming in waves for the past 6 weeks so I know it’s not a cold.
My aunt and uncle on the mainland came down with Covid so we won’t be going there for New Year’s, now. I’m not sure if I’m going to bother to head out to my Dad’s. That would be a lot of travelling to stay a night. (I’m not really interested in staying longer than that.) Especially during cold/flu season. The ferry is a giant sneeze castle, too and it’ll be packed. So, I may reschedule for later in January when things calm down.
My Gofundme/fundraiser has gone well so far. Because of it, I was able to see the dentist this week and I’ll be going back to get my fancy night guard made in January (it’ll be for the bottom teeth and made thinner). This thing is going to cost around $700. lol. I also will be seeing a new physiotherapist that specializes in TMJ next month. I’ll have to go at least once a week and at $130 a pop, that adds up quick. If those things don’t work, then I’ll have to see the TMJ surgeon. Unfortunately, that runs into the thousands so fingers crossed the first two work. I’m super grateful to everyone’s generosity and support. I’ve had a lot of encouragement over the past few weeks since I’ve started it as well which makes me feel good, too.
Today, I went to comedy class online. I didn’t have any new jokes. I wasn’t good at giving feedback to others, either. It’s hard when you feel like the life’s been sucked out of you. It was nice to show up and see everyone, though. I told them one of my goals is to do more live/in-person shows. I haven’t done one in a long time. I can’t keep waiting to “feel better” because that day will likely never come. I need to find a way to do this. I think a big issue is my sleep. I’ve been having problems falling asleep before 1am. Sometimes it’s as late as 3am. Then I have to be up at 7. Having cancer, I need more than that. So I’ll be working on it.
I can’t believe 2024 is just over a week away. It’s New Year’s resolution time! 😝 I haven’t made a resolution in well over a decade. Do people even do them anymore? Maybe I’ll create a poll below and see. lol. Because of my health, it’s hard to even set goals because things are always changing BUT I’m going to try, anyway. Maybe I’ll post them here (closer to January 1st) to keep myself accountable and maybe write a monthly update on how it’s going. I doubt it’ll work but whatever. I’m trying. 😆
I’ve read a few books this month and watched some movies but I’m too tired to stare at my phone any longer to write reviews so I’ll do that later. I did re-watch Serendipity for like… the 20th year in a row. lol. It’s my favourite rom-com and I rewatch it every Christmas. (Just one of my little guilty pleasures.)
Now, I’m going to drink my tea and read my book as per usual.
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taenys · 2 months
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two guys making me cry today. we love to see it!!!
guy 1 ghosting me for a week, ignoring all my “i miss you” texts and random daily update texts, lovey dovey “hope you’re okay” texts because i was worried something happened to him, just straight up silent treatment to my constant begging of attention lol and then seeing his ex posting a story with him on a hike today really sent me over the edge.
and then he had the audacity to finally text me back like nothing happened. not an ounce of affection in said texts. when i made an offhand, joking (slightly bitter, i suppose) comment that he should add the selfie he sent me (from said hike with his ex) to his dating profile because it’s really good, he threw a fit. asking if i was friendzoning him and why I would say that, why i would be encouraging him to get more dates 💀 MY GUY!!!! you’ve ignored every single romantic text and selfie i’ve sent all week, have made zero indication that you even want to see me or like me at all, and chose to hangout with your ex instead of IDK??? ME?????
it was a huge fucking reality check to realize, damn, this dude really ain’t into me at all. he doesn’t text me back ever, and would rather spend his weekends with his ex and not me, cool. if anyone has friendzoned me it’s fucking YOU!!! i didn’t say all that, but i wanted to. instead i just apologized for making him feel weird with my joke comment and he never replied. back to being ghosted. well, good news is this time i’ll let him ghost me. i won’t fight it lmao bye you dick!!!
and then we have guy number 2. last weekend he texted me at 2 am and asked if he could come over because he was already in my town visiting a friend earlier! how coincidental! my town which is an hour away from portland where he lives, and the middle of nowhere! i realize now how silly it was that i didn’t question who this “friend” was that he has in my town that he’s never mentioned before (not once did he ever say “oh, i have a friend who lives there! i go there all the time!” when we matched…oof). anyway, i let him come over and smash for the first time. and spend the night. and we had a super lovey day date in my little town the next morning. i even took him to my library. it was so nice. i couldn’t wait to do it again.
cue tonight. i’m already sad and upset from the mini fight with guy 1 (who i’ve already decided i don’t want to continue seeing) so when i got a 1am text from this guy saying “surprise! i’m in your town again!” idk what compelled me to jokingly ask if he had another girl he was dating in my town lol. but i did. and he answered honestly. yeah, he does. he just got done with a date. and it “didn’t go well.” i just made a joke about how he’s attracting girls from my tiny town, wow! shrug emoji from him. i then wonder if he’s going to dare ask to come over now that i know he was with another girl.
“i was gonna ask if i could come over but i don’t feel good about it. like i don’t want you to feel like i’m using you” WELL I’M GLAD YOU REALIZE HOW SHITTY THAT WOULD BE FOR ME. jesus. if i’d known that last time i would not have let him come over, fuck. i tell him plainly that i don’t feel great about being his fucking 1am post-date booty call to be fucking honest. he tells me that my feelings are valid and that “i didn’t wanna have sex, just thought it’d be nice to see you” but that he understands why i would think that. at this point im crying in my bed lol. i tell him that as much as i would love his company because it’s been a rough weekend (with cats being sick), knowing that he didn’t drive all this way just to see me, but to see another girl, and that i’m just a second stop, will make me feel sad. he says he’s sorry. i say it’s fine. whatever.
now i’m crying again. this shit with guy 2 hurts worse. i WAS used that first time. even if unintentionally. he’d come all this way to see another girl. he’d never offered to come see me in the month we’ve been talking. he drove the distance for her though. and then was like “i guess i can fuck krystal while i’m here”
i don’t deserve this shit. jesus fucking christ. i’m a hopeless romantic stuck in this hellish modern dating world. and i want OUT!!!!!
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unknowncallers-world · 9 months
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About a year ago, I wrote things about my ex that weren’t true. I was just so fucking numb I didn’t know what tf was going on. About a year ago, she was with Alyssa. And Alyssa dmed me telling me I was treating Taylor like shit and I was saying things I shouldn’t be saying. At the time I was hanging out with Shannen and I told Alyssa I was taken, which she didn’t believe. I mean I wasn’t taken. I lied. I lied about everything because I felt like everyone was better off without me but at the same time I didn’t want to feel like I did anything wrong. I was such a shit person. I still can’t believe who I was a year ago. Last year I started my med school rotations. I was happy with Taylor. Then something changed and I just became depressed and I refused to admit I needed help. We broke up. Of course that wasn’t all my fault. But the rest of it was. I couldn’t give Taylor space. I fucking wrote her a love poem. I fucking stalked her on twitter and tumblr. I would type her name in on Snapchat and ig to see if she unblocked me. Everything was a fucking mess. I was a fucking mess. I was so depressed. Not even the gym could help. I was eating like shit and too depressed to workout because I couldn’t stand to be in my own head. But then I got help. I got meds. And I worked on myself. I got better. I tried to heal. But once that started, I realized all of the ducking mistakes I made were it’s Taylor. I saw how shit and wrong I was and all I wanted was her back. Then randomly in November, i was checking like I always did to see if I was still blocked and I wasn’t. I remember writing on here that I wouldn’t reach out to her after everything that happened in hopes she was still reading this and would reach out. That same night I was dreaming about her and tbh I love dreaming about her because it’s like the only connection I have left. But that night it was like 1am. She followed me and dmed me. I thought maybe this was our chance. The next day or maybe a couple days later she asked what I was doing. She randomly called me and we talked for a few hours. Right after that I had therapy and I knew I still loved her. I wanted to tell her so bad. So i did and she didn’t say anything. I tried so hard not to care. But eventually I just pretended like nothing happened. We started dming more everyday. We started being friends on switch and playing Minecraft together and we would talk on the phone. Then over thanksgiving she went to Arizona where I’m assuming she met her current girlfriend. I told her I loved her again. She didn’t say anything. About a week later she wrote me back. I still have that screenshot to this day, 8 months later. It was during the World Cup and all I said was that it was ok. She said she rooted for Messi for me and I said thanks. Then she started posting about Jackie more. One of the hardest things I did was to unfollow her. Eventually I went back to Illinois and I had a rough few weeks. I felt shitty. But eventually I started making new friends and going out more. I became happy. I met J who ended up being my girlfriend. I mean I asked her to be my girlfriend. I told her I loved her first. She visited me in Philly. I’m visiting her in Chicago in a few weeks. We talk about living together and all I can think is why do I feel more brave now to be with my girlfriend than I did with Taylor. Of course it was because taylor was my first girlfriend well my first relationship and I didn’t know what to do. But lemme say I haven’t gone one fucking day without thinking about her. We matched and talked on Snapchat in December 2020. I remember seeing her stories when she was in Greece randomly. I remember always liking when she would check out my story. Then when we matched again September 2021 and started talking again, i was in shock about how it was turning out. We don’t follow each other on ig but not a day goes by where I don’t randomly type in her name. Not a day goes by where I don’t miss her. Not a day goes by where I low key hope they break up because I want her back. That won’t change. It will never change.
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arvinsescape · 3 years
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Nurse Y/N
A/N: I’ve been working on this for a couple of days and happy to finally be able to post it. Mob Tom fic, i tried to add smut but i don’t think my writings there at the minute, i’ll do it eventually. Bit of a slow burn but not too much. As always i hope you enjoy.
Summary: You’re a nurse and you’ve always been on the right side of the law, what happens when you meet a man that sweet and caring but definitely not on the right side of the law.
Warnings: Language, mentions and hints of smut.
W/C: 4.4K,
You’d lived with your best friend for around a year now. A bad relationship had brought you to his door, he took you in and the rest is history. You were working as a nurse in the local hospital and you had no idea what exactly it was that your best friend did, he didn’t talk much about it, claiming he “just did odd jobs for someone”. You were sceptical to say the least, the amount of times he had come home covered in bruises led you to believe that his activities were probably not legal. But he never brought it home and being non the wiser made things slightly easier for you. It was your day off and you were stuck into a Netflix series when you saw your best friends name light up on your phone screen. You noticed it was 1am and wondered why he wasn’t home yet.
“Hi James. What’s up?”
“Y/N? Where are you?” He asked in a rushed tone. He sounded out of breath. You could hear the slamming of a car door over the speaker.
“I’m at home. Why? James what’s wrong?” You asked him, voice growing more concerned.
“I need your help. If I text you an address can you meet me there?”
“Sure. James are you okay?” You asked as you started to put your shoes on.
“I’m fine! I just need you to meet me.”
“Okay, text me the address.” You sighed as you hung up and grabbed your car keys.
Once you received the address you set off in the direction that your SAT NAV was taking you. As you came nearer to the destination you started to feel more and more uneasy. It was almost too quiet for London. You pulled into what looked like an abandoned warehouse, now you were really uneasy. You fumbled around your bag as you tried to find your phone, with a tight grip you dialled James’ number.
“Y/N? Where are you?”
“I’m outside but what is going on? Where have you brought me?”
“Stay there I’ll be out in a second.” He huffed as he put the phone down.
He wasn’t wrong, it couldn’t have been 30 seconds later that he arrived at your car, pulling the door open. He looked physically fine but the worry on his face still had you on your guard. What on Earth was going on? You glanced at the time in your car 1.10am. What the hell is happening?
“Y/N. I’m sorry for calling so late but I didn’t know who else to call. I can’t go to a hospital and I need one, so I need your help. I need you to do something for me.” He spoke faster than you thought physically possible.
“Slow down. What is it? Are you hurt?” You asked as you scanned him overlooking for wounds that weren’t there. What did he mean he needed a hospital but couldn’t go?
“The guy I work for. He’s been injured, someone managed to get a shot off on him.” He rambled as he pulled you towards the building.
“Shot! What the hell are you talking about? What do you do?” You almost screamed.
“Look. I promise I’ll explain everything Y/N. But right now I need you to help him. I can’t take him to a hospital it would be too risky. I need you to take the bullet out and stitch him up. Please, he’s my boss. He’ll make it worth your while.” He asked you with pleading eyes as he pulled you further into the warehouse.
“James. I’m not a surgeon! I don’t know if I can do that!” You started to panic now.
“You can give stitches though? He’s been shot in the arm, he’s losing blood, but I think the bullet is stemming the bleeding. I don’t think it’s lodged too far in. Please and I promise I’ll explain everything.”
The nurse in you was screaming at you to try and help who ever it was but you were frightened, you weren’t a surgeon. What if it went wrong? He could sue you; you’d lose your career. You weren’t supposed to do this off duty. So many things were running through your mind as James took you into another room that was filled with 4 other men. All dressed rather smart to say they’d clearly been involved in illegal activity. The man who James had informed you was the boss became apparent when you saw him clutching his arm. Blood dripping down it.
“Boss. This is Y/N, she’s a nurse.” James explained as you both stopped in front of him. He was attractive at first glance. Beautiful brown eyes and brown curls that were almost begging to have fingers run through them. You kept quiet, feeling intimidated as he stared you down, expression completely unreadable.
“Can you trust her?” The ‘Boss’ asked James.
“She’s been my best friend for years; you can trust her.” James answered confidently. You just shook your head, finally having the courage to speak up.
“Hang on just a second. What do you mean can you trust her? I’m the one who should be wondering that, your sat there having been shot, apparently need my help and you have the audacity to ask if you can trust me?” You almost screamed at the man in front of you. You don’t know what made you snap, maybe it was the stress of the situation or how tired you suddenly felt. James grasped your arm in a tight grip.
“Y/N. I love you, but this is no time to be head strong. Just please, be respectful, he’s an important man.” He said to you as he released your arm. Before you could say anything, the brown eyed man spoke first.
“No, that’s quite alright James. She’s feisty, nothing wrong with that.” He said as he smirked in your direction. He may have been good looking, but he was irritating the hell out of you. You just looked at him as if to say, “what the fuck?” He just smiled at you. “Now, I would very much appreciate it if you could help me out. I will pay you what ever you want, and I promise not to say a word to anyone about what you have done for me.” He gave you what seemed to be a genuine smile and you sighed. Perhaps doing what he asked was the fastest way to get to bed.
“Look, I’m not a surgeon. I might not be able to do much, but I’ll try. Let me have a look.” You said as you eyed him carefully. James had left to stand near the other 3 men in the room. You took his arm as you assessed the damage. Maybe you could do this. The wound didn’t look all that bad. “I think I can do this. It just, it will hurt, and I don’t have anything to numb the pain. In fact, I don’t have anything at all to work with.” You suddenly realised.
“Well I came somewhat prepared. Sam? Have you got the first aid kit?” He turned to one of the men. ‘Sam’ nodded and made his way towards you, handing you the first aid kit and making his way back to his original spot. This really was some strange operation.
“Like I said, this might hurt.” You sighed as you got to work.
**
“Okay. All done.” You said as you finished up the stitching. You were surprised at how little he flinched throughout the process. He must have one hell of a pain tolerance. “Take some paracetamol and ibuprofen when you get home. I really would suggest you go to an actual hospital to make sure I removed that bullet properly.” You said as covered the stitching with a bandage.
“Thank you very much. I’m sure I won’t be going to a hospital, not sure how I would explain a bullet wound without the police getting involved and what would I tell them? I’d have to tell them nurse Y/N helped me out in the first place.” He teased.
“Whatever, just please don’t sue me if you end up losing your arm.”
“I promise. Now how much would you like for what you have done. Name your price. It’s yours.”
“I don’t want anything. Just please don’t tell anyone what I did and try and stay out of trouble.” You sighed as you looked into his brown eyes. You really were tired now, thankful that you had a day off tomorrow, well today.
“I already promised that I wouldn’t say anything and as for staying out of trouble I’m afraid I can’t promise you that. But hopefully I won’t need your services like this again. Are you sure you don’t want any money?”
“I’m sure. It wouldn’t feel right to take money when I know I shouldn’t have done that. I really just want to go home and go to bed.”
“Whatever makes you feel better princess.” He said as he flashed you a genuine smile and that nickname made your stomach do things that you’d rather not think about. He wasn’t someone you should get mixed up with. That much you could tell.
“James? Are you coming?” You finally turned to your best friend and he just shook his head, saying that he had things to finish up there and with that you left. You fell into bed and as soon as your head hit the pillow you were asleep.
**
You woke up at around 12pm, having not gotten into bed until 3am and you were still feeling exhausted. You briefly wondered if last night was just a strange dream was just but you knew it wasn’t. You made your way downstairs and made yourself a coffee, yeah you were going to need caffeine to wake up today. You wandered into the living room where you saw James sat on the couch, he looked over at you.
“Y/N. Thank you so much for last night. I’m so fucking sorry that I dragged you into that, but I couldn’t let anything happen to him, he’s a very important man.” James rambled as you took a seat on the opposite end of the couch, sipping your coffee.
“I just want an explanation, James. It’s the least you can do.” You were still slightly pissed at him, but you knew he wouldn’t have risked you and your job if it wasn’t important.
“Okay. Look, I’m involved with the London ‘mob’ if you want to call it that. I’ve made it pretty far up in the ranks and that was my boss, the leader you saved last night. We were reclaiming some old territory when things went a little south and he got shot. I can’t thank you enough for what you did, and I promise I wouldn’t have gotten you involved if I didn’t have to.” He sighed. You’d stayed silent, taking in his words and you just sighed back.
“Listen, I’m still pissed but it’ll pass. I had a gut feeling you were involved in something illegal and I think you should get out if you can but please don’t get me involved like that again and we’ll continue to pretend that this never happened and you don’t do what you do for a living. The less I know the better.” James smiled at you as he hugged you.
“Thank you Y/N. You’re the best. I love you; you know that. I can deal with you being pissed; I deserve that much. I promise I’ll make it up to you, pizza for tea. I’m buying!”
Most people would say that you’d had a rather nonchalant response but honestly. You didn’t want to know more; he was your best friend and maybe you were trying to look the other way to protect your image of him or maybe you were still tired and your brain hadn’t quite caught up yet but you left it at that and he told you he was going to ‘work’ and off he went about his day as you started going about your own.
You’d just been for a shower when you heard a knock at the door. You hadn’t been expecting a visitor and assumed it was your friend who also had today off. You threw on your pyjamas which consisted of shorts and a tank top as you made your way to the door.
“You know Lizzy, you could’ve texted me before you decided to- “Your words were cut short as you opened the door. It wasn’t Lizzy at all, it was the man you’d helped last night, escorted by two other men that you didn’t recognise.
“If I had your number, I might’ve done sweetheart.” He said as he took in your attire. You suddenly felt self-conscious under his stare and wished you’d have grabbed your dressing gown.
“What are you doing here? How did you know where I live?” you asked him.
“My apologies but James said you lived together, and I know where all my staff live.”
“Okay, so what do you want?”
“I came to thank you properly for last night. You don’t want paying and I can’t take what you did for free.” He said as he watched you cautiously eye the two men that he’d brought with him. “Don’t worry about them, apparently I’m not aloud to go anywhere alone until my arm is healed. Mum’s orders and you know you don’t argue with your mother.” He said, trying to ease you, you still looked somewhat tense. “Can I come in? I’ll make them stay outside.” He asked and there was that genuine smile again. It made your stomach flip and you just nodded as you moved aside and let him in. Shutting the door rapidly as he crossed the thresh hold.
You hadn’t noticed his hands were full until he placed down a large box on your kitchen counter. “Do I want to know what’s in there?” You couldn’t help but ask.
“Well unless you’re allergic to anything in there, I wouldn’t be too concerned.” He teased. You made your way over and opened the box, it was full of god knows how many boxes of all different types of chocolate. “I did ask James and he said you loved chocolate so I thought I could repay you by starting there.”
“Well thank you but honestly I don’t want anything else. It’s not like you were on deaths door.” You joked back. Something about him set you at ease when it probably shouldn’t have.
“Well who knows? I might’ve lost my arm.” He laughed. You couldn’t help but laugh with him, it was almost contagious. “Tom by the way.”
“Wow. James didn’t call you Tom; I must be honoured.” You laughed.
“Well unlike James, you don’t work for me princess.”
“No, I suppose I don’t.”
“Cute pj’s by the way.” He teased as he eyed you again. You instantly wrapped your arms around yourself, feeling conscious under his stare, but not in a bad way, in a way that made your stomach flutter and heat rush to your cheeks.
“Um, thanks. Look, not to be rude but what do you want?” You asked as you locked eyes with him. God he was beautiful.
“I’d like to take you out to lunch, as a thank you. Don’t read too much into it.”
“Will you take no for an answer?”
“Not really darling.”
“Fine. Give me 10 minutes.” You laughed as you made your way upstairs to get changed.
**
He took you to a nice restaurant at the other side of town, it seemed expensive, but he didn’t seem to mind, it seemed like he knew everyone that worked there. He probably owned it; you came to realise. It was actually a lovely afternoon spent chatting and getting to know him. There were numerous times when you found yourself wondering how he ended up being part of a mob. He was sweet but every time you remembered what he did for a living you were reminded that you couldn’t let yourself go there.
**
“And where have you been?” James teased as you came through the door.
“Out.” You answered vaguely.
“With a certain brown eyed, brown haired mobster?”
“How did you know?” You asked, shocked.
“Well I know he was interested in how I knew you and then we didn’t see him again all day.”
“Right, well, he just wanted to say thank you.” You said as you joined him on the couch.
“Bullshit Y/N. I think he has a soft spot for you.” He continued to tease you. “I mean come on. He’s gorgeous.”
“It was just a thank you lunch!” You defended yourself. “Besides it wouldn’t be a good idea, you know with what he does for a living, if you want to call it that.”
“Yeah, but he could offer you protection and all the money you’d ever need. He might do illegal stuff but he’s not a complete monster Y/N.”
“James, please don’t go there.” You groaned as you took a slice of pizza from the box he’d ordered in.
“Okay, okay. I know that look though. That one you had when you came through that door. I just have one question for you.” He said as he laughed.
“What’s that?” You asked, mouth full of pizza.
“When are you seeing him again?”
You picked up the nearest pillow and hit him with it, mumbling a ‘fuck off’ as he laughed at you. You finished your night watching a movie before heading to bed, dreams of a curly haired, brown eyed boy flooding your dreams.
**
Two weeks passed before you saw Tom again. James had mentioned he wasn’t going to be in for the night, and you’d decided to read a book as there was a knock at the door. You made your way over and opened the door, there he was, alone this time.
“Déjà vu. I swear you had exactly the same thing on the last time you opened this door for me.” He laughed as he gestured towards your attire.
“I did. What are you doing here Tom?”
“I actually just came to see you.” He said as he made his way past you so you could close the door.
“And why’s that?”
“Look, I can’t stop thinking about Y/N. God knows I’ve tried but I can’t, and I know we hardly know each other but I’d like to change that.” He answered, he’d stepped slightly closer to you.
“Tom.” You sighed. “We shouldn’t. This isn’t a good idea, you know that right?”
“Trust me, I’ve been through this a thousand times since we last saw each other but I can’t help it. I think I like you, like a lot.” He said as he reached towards you, catching a strand of your hair as he played with the end of it. Your heart rate was starting to pick up at the closeness.
“Tom I-“
“I could give you everything and anything you want princess. I’d look after you and that’s a promise, I know my line of work is messy and comes with risks but I’m willing to risk everything for a chance with you.” He’d tucked the strand of hair behind your ear and placed his hand on your cheek, moving his face closer to yours, you could feel his breath on your lips.
“We shouldn’t” you whispered, although you knew you didn’t mean it. He just shook his head in agreement with you. Lips almost touching.
“If you don’t want to just tell me to stop.” He whispered against your lips. Your body moved before your brain could catch up and you connected your lips. It was like fireworks had exploded in your stomach. Your lips moved against each other as your fingers made their way into his curls, god they were soft.
He backed you up until your back hit the cool wall behind you, moving his hands to grip your hips. His tongue slid over your bottom lip asking for access which you gladly gave. Your tongues danced together like they were old dance partners. Knowing exactly how to move together and it made you moan slightly. You pulled back for a bit of air before his lips were back on yours. You’d never been kissed like this before. Almost as if he was trying to tell you everything through the kiss.
He tapped your thigh and you jumped, his strong arms instantly catching you as he pinned you further against the wall. Your mind was racing, this was possibly the hottest, most intense kiss you had ever engaged with. “Do you want to stop?” He mumbled against your lips. You only shook your head in response reconnecting your lips as he carried you through the flat, you directed him towards your bed room and the night was spent with you receiving the most amount of attention and pleasure you’d ever experienced with another human being.
**
You woke up with a warm arm wrapped around your waist, your mind flooded with the events of the night before. You smiled to yourself as you carefully removed his arm and made your way into the bathroom. You examined yourself in the mirror after having brushed your teeth and gasped at the large hickey that had been left on the sweet spot of your neck. You bit your lip and smiled. You threw on Tom’s shirt that he’d worn last night and some underwear, making your way into the kitchen. You boiled the kettle as you got two mugs out, lost in your thoughts you didn’t hear a second person enter the kitchen.
“Well someone looks happy.” James laughed as you lightly screamed and turned around to face him.
“James, I didn’t think you’d be back so soon.” You gasped, hand on heart as you waited for it to beat at a regular pace again.
“I recognise that shirt.”
“How can you recognise a white button up shirt?” You asked in disbelief.
He just laughed at pointed at the sleeve, you looked down and on the cuff of the shirt was ‘T.H’ embroidered in gold. Heat instantly rose to your cheeks.
“It’s none of your business!”
He threw his hands up in defence. “You’re right, it’s not. You look happy though, I’m happy for you.”
“I don’t- we haven’t spoken about it.” You sighed. Just as you spoke Tom walked into the kitchen, he smiled at you.
“I wondered where that had gotten to.” He laughed gesturing towards the shirt as he said morning to James. James shook his head and laughed.
“I’ll leave you two to it.” He grabbed his keys and wallet and walked out of the flat. Leaving you and Tom stood in the kitchen. He was shirtless and he looked good, you bit your lip as you looked at him.
“Morning princess.” He smiled as he wrapped you in a tight, warm embrace.
“We should talk about last night.” You mumbled against his chest. He sighed.
“Look, I meant what I said. All of it.” He kissed the top of your head. You pulled out of his embrace as you looked at him.
“I just- I know it might seem ridiculous because of last night but I want to take it slow. We should get to know each other. We don’t know enough about each other yet and last night, I don’t regret it but maybe we should take it back to step one.”
“Whatever you want princess. I promise I’ll look after you. I know my line of work bothers you and I hope that you can accept that it’s part of what I do but I understand if getting to know me more means that that is too much for you.” He said as he looked into your eyes. He was being vulnerable, honest and you knew you had to give him the chance. You’d regret it if you didn’t.
**
You went on dates and it would be three months before you found yourself in bed with him again. You fell hard and you fell fast for him. You ended up leaving your job in favour of becoming the woman who oversaw all of Tom’s books. He kept you safe and he loved you and made you feel more loved than you thought possible. Anything you wanted, you got. Anything you needed, you had. Anything you asked of him, done.
You never imagined that you’d end up dating a man on the wrong side of the law and being okay with it, being complicit in it but here you were. You married about three years in and nothing changed, he still made you feel the same way he had years prior. You had three beautiful children with him, and he was best, most loving father a child could hope for. You had two boys which he would do anything and everything for and your little girl well he doted on her completely, she was his little angel, couldn’t do a thing wrong in his eyes.
“You know I never thought I’d say this” he spoke one night as you were cuddled up in bed “but I’m actually thankful I got shot that night.”
“Most people wouldn’t be thankful for that Tom.” You teased him.
“No probably not. But I never would have met you had it not happened.” He said sincerely as he ran his fingers up and down your arm.
“No, you wouldn’t have. I’m always thankful I gave you the chance even if at the time I was wary.” You laughed as you kissed his chest.
“Admit it. I had you the second I kissed you and then gave you one of the best railings you’d ever had.” He teased which earned him a playful smack on the chest.
“Yeah that always helps.” You laughed as you rolled your eyes at him. You couldn’t be more in love with this man if you tried. 
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1plus1kiyoomi · 3 years
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Chapter 6: Fight or Flght Response
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[prev] [next]
[masterlist]
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warnings: mentions of sex and pretty much a toxic relationship
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Morning comes and Kuroo wakes up with a headache. Eyes still closed, he taps on the other side of the bed, his hands looking for your body. “Love?” He groans. “Love, can you bring me some medication? My head hurts.”
Kuroo falls asleep once again and then wakes up an hour later. He sits up, his head ringing. “(Y/N)? Love?” He leaves the bed and doesn’t feel any presence of you in the house. “Oh, it’s 9AM. She must be at work already.”
Well, Kuroo’s not wrong. You are at your office but you aren’t working. You’re weeping at your table because you can’t seem to get rid of Kuroo’s words to his friends.
“So (Y/N) and I are trying to work our marriage out for a year, and she’s taking it way too seriously. While I can’t even look at her face! She messages me all the time about where I am, what I’m doing and all of that. She begs me to go on dates and nags at me if I miss it. I want to tell her off sometimes, but she’s a really good fuck. Like she’s amazing in bed and she lets me have it anytime so yeah. I guess it’s worth to stay.”
It keeps repeating in your head like a broken track. And your tears run down your cheeks and you know it won’t stop for a while. You stand from your desk and move to the little bedroom that is in your office. You lay on the bed and bury your face on the pillow.
The moment you heard his words come of his lips last night, you wanted to slap him hard, beat him up, tear his hair off his head, but you couldn’t. You were glued on the wooden floor of Kenma’s house, not able to believe Kuroo could say that. Your heart shattered into pieces that couldn’t be even counted.
But still, you went home with him. Even slept with him.
If your friends, especially Iwaizumi, find out about this, they’ll definitely tell you to leave him. No excuses. And you don’t want to leave Kuroo.
“Where did I go wrong? Is it because I’m ugly?” You take your phone out and open the camera app. “Very ugly right now. This is why he doesn’t want me to post anything about our relationship.”
Someone knocks on your office door so you wipe your tears quickly and open the Netflix app so you can pretend that you’ve been watching a sad movie this whole time.
“(Y/N)? The flowers are here,” Terushima says as he enters your office. “Why are you crying?”
Speaking of Terushima, he and Kuroo have become friends after their fight. When Kuroo picks you up sometimes and Terushima’s also there, you always find the two talking about hair. The blonde even goes to your place sometimes so he can style Kuroo’s hair. It’s their form of bonding so you really don’t have a say about it.
“This drama is just so sad,” you lie, showing him the screen of your phone that is playing a random sad movie.
“I didn’t know you were the type to cry cause of movies,” the blonde chuckles. “Anyways, fix yourself. Because we will be decorating a big function room starting this afternoon.”
“I almost forgot. The client wanted all real flowers right?” You sigh and sit up from your bed. ‘No time for crying. You’re a busy woman.’
“Yeah, so we have to make sure that the flowers will not wither tomorrow,” Terushima confirms.
You brush your issue with Kuroo under the rag and focus on your work instead.
Evening comes quickly and it’s finally time for your team to set up at the function hall. You had to wait until late evening to start since there was an event beforehand. The bestman of the wedding, Yuta, joined your team as the supervisor.
While you are setting up on the stage, you can feel your workmates throwing weird looks at you. “What?” You raise an eyebrow at them and one of your colleagues walks up to you.
“The best man has been staring at you ever since we got her,” she whispers with a teasing smirk. You roll your eyes at her and brush it off.
It’s always like this. At every event, your colleagues ships you with every best man or groomsman that shows interest towards you. They don’t know you’re actually married and think you’re single so they tease you. In hopes that you finally get to plan your own wedding. Sadly, you already are married and no wedding will take place.
You take a glance at the said man and he is staring at you, but not in a creepy way. As soon as you make eye contact, he smiles at you. You swear your heart skips a beat but at the same time you will never admit that it did.
“Miss (L/N)?” Yuta calls you out of nowhere. Surprised by his sudden presence, you fall on the ladder you are on and land on top of him.
‘What in the drama is this?!’
“I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry!” You push yourself off of the man quickly and bow repeatedly.
“It’s alright! It’s my fault for surprising you.” Yuta stands up as well and when your eyes meet, you burst into laughter. “You’re much prettier up close.”
“So you’re the straightforward type, huh?” You let out a chuckle and he smirks at you. “I thought you’d be a shy one since you have been just staring until now.”
“Well, since you think I’m the straightforward type, let me ask you. Are you single?” Yuta smiles at you shyly this time and you feel your cheeks burn hot.
‘You’re married, (Y/N)! Don’t even think about flirting back.’ You mentally scold yourself and look away from the man beside you. “Find out yourself.”
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The glamorous wedding finally ends and it was one of the best weddings you have every coordinated. The couple is so in love with each other and they are surrounded by supportive family and friends. The guests were very uplifting and fun in general. You even made friends with some of the guests and have gotten closer to Yuta.
“Thank you for planning our wedding. This is such a dream come true!” The bride thanks you with a bow. You bow back and say your thanks as well. “And Yuta’s a good boy.” The bride winks at you before she and groom leaves.
“(Y/N)!” Speaking of the devil.
“Yuta!” You wave at him. He runs towards you and pants when he’s finally in front with you. “Can I help you with something?”
“Do you have a drive home?” He asks you so you shake your head no. You’re just being honest. “Can I drive you to your place?”
“My place is just a 10-minute walk from here, so it’s okay,” you reply. You check the time and it’s already past midnight. “I have to go now. It’s really late. Bye!”
“I’ll walk with you!” Yuta offers. “I won’t take no for an answer.”
“Okay, then. Whatever makes you sleep at night,” you joke and he just laughs.
The two of you walk home and Yuta shares random stories about his childhood. You like it. You like how he is open to you without you trying. You like how he’s initiating first. You like how gentle he is when he is talking to you. You like how he softly calls your name. You like how he’s not hiding that he’s interested in you. But you hate how you want Kuroo to be like that towards you. You hate how you’re still thinking about him.
Kuroo’s words come crashing into your mind again and you badly want to take Yuta’s hand and ask him to bring you home. But your mind is also telling you to come home quickly to Kuroo, even if you know he won’t be waiting for you.
“I’m here!” You say as you arrive in front of your condominium building. “Thank you for walking me.”
“No problem.” Yuta scratches the back of his neck. A change of demeanor happens, and Yuta becomes shy. “Can I get your number? I want to tak-”
“(Y/N)!”
Your world freezes as you hear Kuroo’s voice. It’s 1AM. Why the hell is he outside your building as well? You turn your head see him glaring at you with his arms crossed.
‘What do I do? Kuroo might misunderstand! And I can’t tell Yuta that Kuroo is my husband because he wants to keep our relationship a secret. Oh my gosh! What to do?’
You’re panicking. Your whole system is. You can feel your fingers tremble. Kuroo is walking towards the two of you and is already so close but you still don’t know what to do and say. The particles in your container are bouncing on the walls of your space rapidly because of pressure, and it’s making your mind go blank. Your fight or flight response is not functioning well.
Kuroo has been waiting for you at your building’s lobby since 10PM. He was waiting for your message about him picking you up at the hotel, but clearly you forgot about that. He thought you forgot because of fatigue but clearly that’s not the case.
Especially now that a man he has never seen before walked you back to your place.
“Who’s this?” Yuta and Kuroo ask in unison. Yuta glares at Kuroo, not liking how provocative the guy looks. Your husband raises an eyebrow at Yuta, his feline-like eyes glaring back at the unfamiliar guy.
“Kuroo, this is my friend Yuta,” you start to introduce but they aren’t even listening to you. They’re in this staring contest you don’t know about.
“And Yuta, this is Kuroo, my brother.”
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Facts:
Your reactions when you are nervous are driven by the production of hormones and equip us to fight or escape from situations that are dangerous or threatening. This is known as the fight or flight response.
Nervousness can cause stuttering and rambling.
Anxiety may be partly genetic.
People who are anxious are quicker to pick up on changes in facial expressions than those who are but they are less accurate. Thus, it causes misunderstandings.
Taglist: @postsfromthe6 @elianetsantana @chaelysian @kiyobbie @lilxstan @moonlightaangel @oh-hey-its-a-simp @kellesvt @lifeisnotdiajoubu @starry-magicshop @stantalentstanunderratedgroups @mint-mai @torilovestowrite @faithmoonxd @agaashesmilktea @birdiewolf @yeibuub @maitenight @ashhhh26 @kageyamasgirl @tnu-ree @avatarkyoshithewarrior @kurokawa-aida @dabisdominion @chanayah @sevenseoul @marissaraeblr @amlnadya @weebintheinternet @shizukusimp @madmelle @soullesstaco @merrdlp @kouholic @kiyoomi-channie @kageyuh @kaachanultra @sabzhabib @134340-cm @toripersonalacc​ @itsimjaebeomsforehead @todobruhski  @graykageyama @coconut-dreamz @rienin @dawnsbaby @kagebunshiin  @heavenini @d-efend
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littlefreya · 4 years
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The Kitten & the Bear - Part 1
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Intro: This story is a collab and was written by both @wolvesandhoundshowltogether​ and I. It was born out of a fun role play we have going on. We ended up having so much a fun with this particular idea that we thought we should post it as a 3 part story and share it with the rest!
| Read Part 2  | Read Part 3 |
Summary: After a night of drinking in town get Walter’s bratty wife ends up with pure chaos and the overprotective grumpy husband is having none of her shenanigans. 
Pairing: Detective Walter Marshall x OFC (first person pov) 
Word count: 3k
Warnings: Bratty behaviour, vandalism, dominant overprotectiveness, BDE, husband stalking his wife, sexual innuendo, dirty inappropriate talks, mentions of sex and oral, weed and alcohol usage. Sex in the next parts :D Walter is a Boomer. 
A/N: We didn’t beta it and did transform it from 2nd to 1st person POV, really hoping you guys will enjoy it as we did. Feel free to share your thoughts. 
Title: The Kitten & the Bear
Nothing chilled my heart more than waking up in an empty bed. Walter was already gone, leaving his side of the mattress cold and abandoned. A heavy sigh broke from my lips, I stroked the ghost of the kiss that still tingled on my cheek, knowing he planted it there before heading to work. 
Sadness seeped into my heart as I realised I won't see him today. Our work scheduled conflicted and I have scheduled a "date night" with my girls in the evening. Picking up my phone, I texted him a pouty emoji and then headed to get my day started.
Walter left me on read, which just fuelled the brat in me. When he called during his lunch break, he was taciturn as usual, and most of the call was about his disapproval of us girls going out without at least one male friend or a boyfriend to chaperone.
"Oh my god, Walter, this is not the 50s! Women can leave their house without a husband tagging along!" I grunted and berated him, "stop acting like someone is going to kidnap me!!! I'm an adult woman!" I snapped at him while sitting at the cafe. People sitting around stared quietly as I hung up the phone, and stormed out.
~~~
Walter looked at his mobile phone, shocked. He couldn't even remember the last time someone hung up on him, let along his wife.
"Fucking brat," he muttered as he pocketed it. 
After lunch, he went into the precinct. Since it was flu season and they were having a shortage of uniformed officers, he volunteered to patrol tonight. Assuming he might even be able to check up on me wherever I get to town. Just to keep me safe. That's right. Not from jealousy. Not because I'll be all dolled up and tipsy and every man in the vicinity will ogle me.
~~~
As the evening loomed, I was in dire need of letting loose. Walter had left me incredibly frustrated, acting like a police officer from hell rather than my husband. Going through my closet, I stumbled upon the most outrageous piece of wardrobe: a black strappy thing with corset details at the front. The same one I've worn for our first date which of course ended up with Walter and I dry humping like two horny teenagers at the back of his truck and him eating me out until I came all over his beard 4 times. 
I slapped a dark red lipstick and put on a pair of red "fuck me" pumps before leaving to meet the gals in a new night club that had just opened. I might or might not have a rolled-up joint in my purse.
~~~
Walter was sitting in a patrol vehicle on the opposite side of the street from the new fancy club with translucent walls. We were all sitting beside the window at a small table full of cocktail glasses, but the girls were gesturing toward the dance floor. Walter chose a dark spot on the street to park the car and was wearing a beanie. 
But he didn't need it. He knew I was oblivious to him and also to the men staring at me from 3 different tables. He ground his teeth frustrated when he first noticed that I was wearing that dress. His blood boiled as I was slowly sipping a cocktail with a sexy little pout around the long straw.
"Let's dance!!! I wanna dance!!!" I whined at my friend Keylah, grabbing her wrist and dragging her with me. My posture was slightly unstable after two cocktails and probably not enough food to pad my belly. She followed me to the dance floor while Stephanie remained in her seat, talking to some guy just for the sake of trolling. He'd been hitting on each one of us unsuccessfully. 
After an hour of dancing with Keylah, swaying my ass in ways that didn't leave any imagination to the men lurking, I remembered the little treat I had in my purse and decided we should take a small break to breathe some fresh air. 
I grabbed the girls, and we walked outside.
"Okay, don't you dare mention this to Walter," I warned them as I took the joint out from my purse.
"Daddy Magnum gonna punish you?" Steph teased while I lit the weed. 
"Oh, you have no idea, he gave me shit about seeing you tonight without a male chaperone, like this is Mad Man or something." 
"Woah! Walter is a boomer!!!" Keylah teased, and we all laughed hysterically. 
~~~
Unbeknownst to me, Walter was watching us dance from his patrol car, getting more and more frustrated by the hour. He observed as I gathered both girls and came out on the street, walking a couple of meters away from the entrance. A frown fell on his face as he saw me taking a lighter out from my purse.
"She doesn't even smoke, what the hell?" he fumed. 
His eyes widened when he saw the telltale shape of a joint between my fingers. His mouth was agape as I lit it up and started smoking and passing it around. "What the fuck? Where did she get that?" he muttered incredulously.
'It's fucking illegal in Minnesota, what the fuck? A cop's wife at that!' He thought, rage simmering in his gut.  
The police radio suddenly began buzzing, the sergeant calling on the line. 
"Hey Marshall, Toby came in for the night shift after all. Do you want him to keep you company?" 
'And see Walter's wife going to town on a spliff? No fucking way.' 
"No, Sarge, thanks. It's uh... calm tonight." He frowned from afar. "Nothing but law-abiding citizens," he replied, hoping his sarcasm didn't go through while he was watching the wife of a respected detective drunk and smoking weed in the great outdoors.
"All right" the sarge concluded and cut the line, and Walter put back the radio.
‘Un-fucking-believable.'
~~~
The girls and I fell into a fit of wild giggles, thoroughly buzzed and high at the same time. My skirt rode up my thighs, and I didn't even bother fixing it as the combination of drugs and alcohol made me frivolous and careless. 
"Is Walter such a nerd in bed too? Is he one of those guys who won't even make a sound because they are ashamed of it?" Stephanie asked to which I immediately snorted.
"Walter fucks like a beast from hell," I answered and put off the remains of the joint against the heel of my shoe. 
"I had to go to the gyno at least four times in the past because he was too violent, and trust me, the noise he makes, luckily no one called the police yet…" 
"Jennifer, your husband is the police!" Keylah answered, and we burst into another fit of giggles which then gradually died down. 
The same man who bugged us from before followed us outside, giving us some stares and making a suckling voice with his lips. I snorted at him and told him to fuck off before putting my arms around my girls. 
"This place sucks, let's go grab something to eat from the store, if Walter sees me like this I will NEVER hear the end of it".
~~~
Walter was watching us walk away, still furious about my illicit behaviour. He promised himself that he'd have a serious conversation with me about this tomorrow. He gave us two blocks of a head start and then ignited the engine of the car and made a U-turn, slowly he rolled towards the store and saw us enter. He made another U-turn in front of the store to park across the street. He just hoped that we'll buy some nachos and a coke and then call it a night, and call a cab to go home.
~~~
It was close to 1am. We barged into the store, marching through as if we owned the place. Keylah stopped by the condoms section and threw a bottle of lube in my direction. "Here you go, Jennifer, you gonna need it".
I laughed and threw it back at her, grabbing a bag of chips and a bottle of water. 
"Better fuck his brains before he starts asking where you've been tonight," Stephanie added. 
"Can you girls please behave?" The clerk-lady requested politely, giving us a prudent look. I rolled my eyes at her and then stopped short as I saw a large stuffed grizzly bear that reminded me of Walter. I grabbed it and hugged it tightly just as I got the sudden urge to misbehave.
"Girls…" I whispered, making them come closer, "bet you a 20 I can sneak this out without paying!"
~~~
Walter's shoulders slumped, and he let out an irritated groan when he saw one of the girls throwing things inside the store. Though, he sighed in relief when I paused this stupid game, and a small smile tugged the edge of his mouth when I hugged a huge stuffed bear that reached down to my thighs and was high above the top of my head as I squeezed it to my torso. 
The way I looked at the bear reminded him of the loving looks I always gave him. But a sense of foreboding assaulted him as we started whispering and pointed at the door.
~~~
"Okay, okay… shush!" I whispered way too obvious and held the stuffed animal behind my back.
"Hey Keylah, can you pay for my chips?" I asked and backed away toward the door, nearly stumbling on my heels and holding the laughter in my gut. 
Noticing my attempt, the old woman cleared her throat, giving me a glare, "You are going to have to pay for that or I will call the police…"
"Her husb…"
"Shut up, Stephanie!" Keylah shouted and threw a bottle of lube in her direction, accidently hitting my shoulder, which made me drop the bear on the floor. 
"Key, you fucking bitch!!!" I answered and picked up the bottle, throwing it back at her. 
"Hey stop that!!!!" The clerk demanded and walked back behind the counter, picking up her phone. 
We ignored her, laughing like schoolgirls and throwing the bottle back and forth between us. Boxes of tampons and condoms fell to the floor as we moved through the hygiene section shouting playfully. 
As Keylah threw the bottle at me for the 12th time, I lifted it and threw it so hard it hit the window and broke it, causing the store's alarm to go off immediately.
"Oh… fu……..ck" I uttered.
~~~
"Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no," Walter panicked as he saw us vandalising the store. He was immediately ready to jump out of the car, but then it would be obvious he'd been keeping an eye on me. He had to wait for the call. 
He wasn't even hoping that the clerk would not involve the police in the matter. She has to. ‘Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck.’ 
When he saw the lady picking up the phone, he buried his face in his palms and rubbed it tiredly.
"Stupid, fucking bitches" he sighed, not believing his wife being so reckless. 
He picked up the buzzing radio and said, "Marshall. I'm here. On it." 
Without delay, he took the beanie off and got out of the car with his badge and gun ready.
~~~
Fingers dug into my hair, I stared wide-eyed at the broken window, immediately regretting all my decisions in the last couple of hours. 
'Walter was going to fucking kill me'. 
"I am soooooooo……." I began to say, turning to the clerk slowly while Keylah and Steph held their hands over their mouths. "So sorry." I stretched out while the alarm continued ringing in my ears. 
Then just like out of a nightmare, stepping through shards of broken glass with his big black boots, I saw Walter walking in, his brows knit together, his badge and his gun held out but kept low. He was enormous and menacing, yet the sight of him comforted me.
"Oh thank god, it's you!" I call out relieved.
~~~
The glass cracked beneath his steps as he walked in. He looked around and checked the store for cameras. 'Fuck, there were CCTVs'. 
He hoped to snatch me away and take care of the situation without involving... well himself but now that there was evidence it wasn't possible anymore. I was looking at him like a frightened little girl, but he couldn't help me, and frankly, he didn't feel like it either.
He looked at the clerk, showed her his badge and said in a neutral tone "MPD. What seems to be the problem?" 
~~~
My breath hitched at his "cop voice" and the way he asked the clerk. 
Stepping back and standing in the middle of the group, the three of us gaped at him with utter dumbfoundedness. Both my heart and gut dropped to the messy floor out of fear, and the way he carried himself, looking so menacing and authoritative made my panties drenched with arousal. 
"Officer, thank god you arrived! These three tried to steal a stuffed animal and started wreaking havoc in the store, throwing stuff around like children and speaking offensively!" The old woman explained and stood in the middle of the mess, looking helpless. 
My eyes rounded with false innocence, and I nibbled my bottom lip, giving Walter a vulnerable look. 
Walter was patiently listening to the clerk. Not a muscle flinched on his face as if he'd known everything. He took his notebook and a report form out and took care of the paperwork. 
The old lady eyed the three of us nervously while Walter was scribbling, and she hesitantly asked, "I'm sorry, Officer, but shouldn't you handcuff them? They might run."
Walter's curly head lifted, and he flashed the lady a small smile that didn't reach his eyes. "Don't worry, ma'am. They won't run."
"Is he serious?" Steph whispered, and I elbowed her, giving Walter a rather pissed off smile as he pretended not to know us at all and treated me like any other criminal.
Was it that just for show? Probably. We were going to have a serious talk about boundaries once we'd get home.
Walter finished writing his report and made the lady sign it before turning to look at the three of us, clenching his jaw. 
After a long, stern silence, I finally spoke, "Can I still get the teddy bear?"
Walter's nostrils flared as he dug into his pocket, pulled out a 20-dollar bill, slammed it on the counter and said to the clerk "For the bear."
At first, the lady was dumbfounded, then she blurted out outraged "Why are you buying a gift for a criminal?"
Walter didn't even spare her a look. He picked up the bear and looked at me with unflinching, stern eyes that made all three of us take a step backwards.
"Because she's my fucking wife."
The tone of his voice made the three of us startle, and I released a small gasp, seeing the look on his face. Walter made a gesture with his hand singling us to walk out of the store in order, and we did as he commanded. At the same time, my eyes gave him a mischievous smirk, mistaking this behaviour for a show.
Walter left the store last and immediately commanded, "To the car".
When we got there on the opposite side of the street, he opened the car and shoved the teddy bear on the passenger seat, then turned back, crossed his hands on his chest, and looked at all three of us. 
"Here's how it's gonna happen. We go in the precinct, fill out the forms, you stay the night, and most likely will be charged with a misdemeanour. Although the weed might be more problematic." He glared at me pointedly. 
The girls and I collectively gasped. 
"Now get in the back seat, all of you."
With shuddering legs, Keylah and Steph obediently entered the patrol car. I stared at Walter as he stood there towering over me, his massive arms crossed around his broad chest.
Still intoxicated, I looked at him with disbelief, realising two things: he arrived at the scene in less than two minutes after the lady called the police, which is impossible. And two, he couldn't possibly know I had weed on me unless… 
"Were you stalking me?!" I called out, ignoring the police officer and speaking to my husband. My hands went to my hips, my face sulking. 
"Oh my god, Walter! You were! Weren't you?" I frowned and shook my head, grunting with disgust.
"You are in no position to reproach me for anything right now", Walter said, seemingly calm. "But if you wanna know, I was patrolling in the neighbourhood and decided to check up on you. I saw the way you were shaking your ass for strangers" he spat, but he let his eyes roam the tight dress, and the way he subtly licked his lips made me sure he remembered exactly which dress it was.
"Do as you're fucking told and get in the car or you're gonna find yourself in even bigger trouble." 
"Oh my god, Walter!!! Are you fucking kidding me?!" I yelled at him and stepped back, throwing my hands in the air furiously.
"I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!!! MY OWN HUSBAND STALKING ME?! What's next Walter? You gonna put an ankle bracelet thingy on me, so I don't get to leave the house without your fucking permission?!"
I got so angry, my hands pushed at his chest, to which he didn't even budge, and only his jaw tightened.
"I am NOT getting into that car, and you are going to let Keylah and Steph go before you are going to be in trouble!"
Keylah and Steph were both watching with utter fascination as they saw the growing tension in Walter's posture.
Once Keylah and Steph were inside the car, they felt like the immediate danger was over. Their drunkenness and high made them reckless again and they started cheering me in the verbal fight with my husband.
Walter was on the verge of bursting, it was evident from his face. He took a menacing step towards me and despite my anger, a pang of arousal shot in my core.
"Get. in the. fucking. car" he growled in a barely audible voice. He gave me one last chance to voluntarily obey him.
I moved closer toward him, my head tilting up to meet his menacing gaze, my breasts ghostly brushing against his hard torso.
"I am not going anywhere with you," I answered unflinchingly. "Keep this attitude up, and the whole town will get to enjoy me swaying this ass long before you do." I teasingly slapped my own ass and then smirked arrogantly as I heard the girls cheering at the backseat
"That's it."
Quick as lightning, Walter's hands uncrossed and shot out. He grabbed my arms, turned me around with dizzying speed and slammed my torso down on the hood of the police car.
"Jennifer Marshall, you are under arrest for destruction of property, public intoxication and obstruction of a law enforcement officer."
I gasped incredulously as I felt the metal handcuffs closing on my wrists while Walter was performing his duty automatically and methodically. I'd never seen him make an arrest, let alone manhandle me like this.
With my cheek pressed against the cold metal, I could see both Keylah and Steph gape at us, eyes and mouth wide with daze. 
Still intoxicated, I hissed as a shiver of fear and sexual arousal shot through my spine, creeping all the way down to my throbbing core. 
"What the fuck are you doing?!" I cried out in protest. "I am your wife!"
My attempt to stand up brought my ass to collide with his crotch, where I felt the unmistakable throb of his blood circulating down to his groin. 
"Are you also getting the feeling that they're gonna fuck?" Steph whispered to Keylah, loud enough for us to hear.
"Shush!" she answered and stared, licking her lips. 
"Let me go, you fucking pig!" I screamed and squirmed on the hood helplessly. 
"Anything you say will be held against you in the court of law" Walter continued in his deep cop voice as if I hadn't even spoken.
"Say his dick, girl!" Keylah shouted, and Steph wooed, but they quickly shut up and resorted to concealed giggling as Walter shot angry eyes at them. He stepped closer to secure his hold on the handcuffs, and I felt the warm coarse material of his jeans at the back of my thighs.
"If you don't want to add resisting arrest and possession of narcotics to your offences, shut the fuck up and stop squirming."
"Fuck” I hissed, which didn't go unnoticed by Walter. My ass naturally shifted against his hardening bulge, and I moaned gently, not loud enough for the girls to hear but definitely heard by Walter, who had his hand around my cuffed wrists.
"You're enjoying this, big guy?" I spit out sardonically, "controlling your wife like you always want to, hmm?"
With the alcohol flushing through my veins, mingled with the sheer exhilaration of anger, I became more daring than ever.
"I think you are just scared because we both know you are never going to tame me."
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lihikainanea · 3 years
Note
tiger getting small while on vacation and she suddenly becomes paranoid that everyone can hear her (throwback to an old blurb of yours when she wasn’t getting that small yet) so she is panicking everytime they’re intimate, which bill is not going to let slide. he just wants her to let it out, but the poor bean is so anxious, she shuts down. it gets to the point where she can’t even enjoy herself in other aspects, like a dark cloud, so bill secretly switches them to a cute little cottage in the middle of nowhere and fucks her real good. she tries to hold back, but he coaxes her, and when she lets it out? bill thinks he’ll just pass out. her moans this time are those soft high pitched one because she’s just so small. she probably starts crying. i’m such a needy bitch lately idk what’s wrong with me.
Bish I am so here for this.
I think tiger is pretty vocal most of the time, just because her Big Dude hits it so good that she can't even hold it back, and most times she's so small for him and so spaced out that she doesn't even register how loud she's being, the moans she can't stop, the guttural sounds as she's blissed out. And like, for his part Bill loves it. It's his favourite sound in the world, when she whines for him, when he knows he's making her feel good. Bill wants all of it, wants her to yell and scream if she has to, cry, hell she can make goat sounds for all he cares--it's all good.
And while I am absolutely here for the times tiger has had to be real quiet when they're at his family's house, just to switch things up a little, what if this is like....a friend's vacation again? And there are so many elements to this.
Their friends don't know about them, so maybe tiger and Bill are still booking separate rooms like idiots. And maybe Bill always kind of speaks to the resort ahead of time, asks for two rooms to be conveniently located waaaaaayyyyy the hell on the other side of the complex so they don't have to worry so much and can sneak around a bit easier. It usually works like a charm--except this time. This time, somehow, all of the friends end up getting rooms that are side by side down a long hallway.
So there's this added factor that Bill can't be seen coming and going from her room, especially in partial states of undress, because that's weird. They can't have sex snuggle on the balcony, which is like their favourite thing to do in the wee hours of the night and into the break of dawn.
So not only is tiger worried about making noise--oh no no friend, we're taking it a step further here--she's worried about getting caught so she is like, flat out dead bolting her door so Bill can't even come in. And he's getting pissed because she keeps wearing those sundresses and she's covered in tanlines and he's going crazy, she's getting pent up because god he's just so bronzed and so golden and his eyes are so clear and green.
He finally manages to talk some sense into her, no doubt vaguely threatening, and he promises her that he'll be careful. He promises her that no one will see him sneak into her room. Maybe he even does it real casual like, steps out into the outdoor hallway at 1AM, leans on the post, has a smoke--and then just conveniently walks into tiger's room two doors down, instead of his own.
And god, it feels good. It's been too long and this whole forbidden element really gets her going but now she has another problem--she's worried someone is going to hear. Their friends are on either side and the walls at this resort are paper thin, and tiger is focusing so hard on staying quiet that nothing else is working for her. She's frustrated, her eyes are clenched so tight she has tears coming from them, and the only thing she can focus on is just...not making a sound. She's can't focus on how good he smells. She can't focus on how soft his lips are, how warm his tongue is, how blond his hair looks in the glow of the moonlight. She can't focus on it, because if she does she'll lose control and she's terrified someone will hear her.
"You can let go sweet girl," he tries to reassure her, tries to get her to release all those moans he loves to hear so much, "It's okay if they hear you. They know you're here. I'll be quiet."
But tiger just shakes her head. And god the poor girl needs a release so bad, but she just can't get there because she's so worried. And Bill has a rule that like, if tiger doesn't get there--then he doesn't, either. Because that's not fair. So he begrudgingly puts an end to their night, still hard as a rock, and just takes her in his arms for cuddles instead. And tiger feels even more terrible because she knows he needs a release, she wants to give him that, but he won't let her.
And I think the final straw for Bill is when he wakes up at 4AM to tiger's feet pushing on his butt, telling him to get out of bed and that he needs to leave and go back to his own room. Bill is pissed, and he gives her the stank eye the whole day.
He is absolutely unwilling to go this entire vacation without some good lovin', and without being able to wake up with tiger snug in his arms, sucking softly on his thumb. It's just not going to happen. Bill doesn't care if he has to pack up his shit and fly to another fucking resort--it's happening.
He bristles at her the whole day, like a petulant child. He tones is down a lot when he can see that she's actually getting small on him, when he can tell that she's spiralling a bit and really thinking that she did something wrong. He puts his hand on her back as they head to the bar for another round of drinks, rubbing softly.
"You're good for me sweet girl," he coos in her ear, "You're so good for me."
"You're mad," she mumbles, "...at me."
"I'm not mad at you kid," he reassures, "I just need you so bad."
She bites her lip, hiding a shaky sigh and he crowds her space a bit more.
"Are you going to let me fix it?" he asks, "Let me take care of it, so I can have you?"
She looks at him with those big eyes, and his heart fucking stops.
"I need to have you," he murmurs to her, "Will you let me fix it?"
She nods, subtly, and he smiles gently at her.
"Good girl," he says, "My good girl."
And he disappears for a little while that afternoon, reappearing only around dinner time. He finds tiger at the beach bar, playing cards with a few from the group.
"There you are," he says, "I've been looking for you, kid."
He plops a kiss on her head, and nobody flinches--that's pretty normal for them.
"What's up, bud?" she asks.
"We have that excursion in 30 minutes. You didn't forget, did you?"
Tiger catches on real quick.
"Oh shit, I totally did," she says as she stands, " Sorry bud. Let me go uh...grab my stuff."
Bill extends his hand to her, helps her climb over a few legs and over the table.
"See you guys in a bit," he waves a hasty goodbye to the group, and starts walking with her back to the lobby.
"Lobby in 15 minutes. An overnight bag, sunscreen, that bikini I love," he tells her lowly as she takes a mental note of what she needs, "Oh, and tiger?"
She looks up at him, a little thrill running down her spine.
"No panties."
She has to stop the little giggle from escaping, has to physically refrain from skipping to her room to grab her things. And for his part, Bill barely just catches his own hand as it was on its way to a firm smack on her ass.
She meets him as instructed, and he's leaning against a powder blue car from the 1950s that is so typical in these small tropical towns.
"M'lady," he opens the car door for her, helping her into it before going to the other side. He looks comically large in the car, more so than usual, and tiger chuckles.
"Can you even drive here?" she asks. He gives her a mischievous smirk.
"Let's find out."
it takes about 20 minutes. Tiger holds his phone up and dictates the directions--but eventually the little car starts chugging up a hill, and tiger is trying to ignore how turned on she's getting watching Bill expertly switch gears, manipulate the stick shift, get the car up that goddamn hill like a boss--and the she sees it. This beautiful villa, sprawling, she can already see the infinity pool and humongous outdoor deck and the floor to ceiling windows, but most of all--she can't see anything, or anybody else. The villa stands alone, at the top of a mountain.
"Bill--" she starts, but it's cut off abruptly when his big hand covers her mouth. He doesn't say anything, just leans over and kisses her deeply. So deeply that they get a bit lost in it because goddamn it feels good to be able to do that again, but he snaps to his senses when tiger starts trying to crawl over the console and straddle his lap.
"Inside," he says breathlessly, "Let's go inside."
It's a hasty entrance. The bags are thrown by the entryway. The champagne that Bill had chilling on ice since the afternoon is ignored. Food will be delivered later, and he purposely chose a time where he knew they'd be able to get a few rounds in before they were disturbed. He shakes out his shoulders, trying to reel in his desire for just a second, and right as he's about to tell tiger to get on her knees he turns and sees that she's already kneeling for him.
"Good girl," he praises, walking over to her. He looms over her, snapping his fingers so she meets his eyes, and he takes her chin in his hand.
"Tiger, I have rules tonight."
"Yes," she murmurs, "Okay."
She mouths at his thumb, tries to close her lips around it, and he gives it to her. Her shoulders relax as she all but deflates.
"No panties for the next 24 hours. If I see them on you, I'm ripping them off," he says, "Understand?"
"Yes," she sighs breathily.
"You get everything you want tonight sweet girl, but if it's too much, then you tell me," he says, "Understand?"
"Yes."
"What are your words?"
"Yellow," she murmurs around his thumb, "Or pineapple."
He nods curtly.
"Last rule, and the most important one," he pulls his thumb from her mouth so that he has her full attention, shushing her harshly when she whines.
"If you're quiet for longer than 3 seconds, if the walls don't fucking shake with your moans for me, I'll fucking stop," he snarls, "Do you understand me?"
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moonlitceleste · 3 years
Text
Elevator Love (Ch. 2)
Chapter 1
So I know it’s been a while since I posted the first chapter, but I decided to give you guys a second as a Valentine’s Day surprise!
I’m really sorry for not updating earlier; besides hating the first chapter so much that I didn’t want to continue, I’ve been really busy with school and extracurriculars, the other WIPs and hobbies I have, and recently my mental health has made a steady plummet haha.
I simultaneously have a vague idea and also absolutely no idea where this fic will go, so we’ll see! Updates will probably be few and far between because besides all the factors mentioned earlier, I’m a really, really, slow writer
Also, I wrote the last chunk of this chapter 1AM last night, so sorry if it’s not coherent askjdhsj
Ages are as follows (it’s been so long since I wrote the first chapter that I forgot what I initially planned them to be so...)
Alfred: ∞ Bruce: 37 Babs: 30 Dick: 27 Cass: 22 Jason: 22 Duke: 20 Tim: 20 Marinette: 19 Damian: 13
Warning: some profanity/cursing ahead!
-
The heavy metal door to Bruce’s office knocked against the wall with a bang as Jason kicked it open with the toes of his worn black boots.
“What,” he grunted, not even waiting for the older to speak first.
Sure, maybe his unprovoked attitude was a little much, but Jason couldn’t help his annoyance.
Just hours before, he was preparing to settle into his favorite plush beanbag and read (well, reread) The Count of Monte Cristo. After a long week of crime-fighting, nothing sounded better than relaxing next to a crackling fire and getting lost in the pages of his favorite book.
But of course, as soon as he decided to unwind, his phone rang with the obnoxious tune of “Jingle Bells, Batman smells!”
Babs had installed the ringtone as a Christmas prank, reinforced with some advanced encryption she had come up with.
Jason could change it if he wanted to—he wasn’t stupid—but Babs was a tech whiz, and it would take more effort than he wanted to spend. Besides, he didn’t want to give her the satisfaction of seeing him struggle.
After the jingle abruptly breached his bubble of tranquility, Jason grudgingly picked up his phone.
He was immediately met with Bruce’s gruff voice and barely had time to process the words that filtered through before the triple beep that signified the end of the call sounded.
What the fuck?
Jason groaned in frustration and ran a hand through his black locks, ruffling the hair at the back of his head.
First Bruce called him without warning, demanded he meet him in his office, and proceeded to hang up without leaving him room to talk?
Fucking rude.
Why could he have just texted the very short request he had to Jason instead? That way he could just ignore it and pretend he didn’t see it.
It’s not like he had to oblige—he wasn’t a fucking lapdog, thank you very much—but if he didn’t, Bruce would come up with some inane punishment, like making him babysit Damian.
He didn’t hate the kid or anything, but Jason would rather not have to deal with a hormonal boy in the midst of puberty.
So he set down his book, threw on his leather jacket, and crusaded through the shitty Gotham streets on his motorcycle.
Wayne Enterprises was just as pristine as it was his last visit, with glossy gray-black floors and glass that stretched from ceiling to floor, so clean it sparkled.
Jason passed through easily enough, though not without being spared a few glances that varied from shock to suspicion.
The double-takes weren’t unexpected, what with his being the son of their boss and all, and the suspicious glances from those who didn’t recognize him weren’t exactly unwarranted.
He knew his leather-jacket, combat-boot wearing self looked laughably out-of-place compared to everyone else.
Jason ignored the looks, a habit that had quickly become second nature the moment he went from street kid to ‘street kid with a roof over his head.’
The elevator was thankfully vacant, and as the doors started to close, he shot a quick thanks to the universe that no one else had decided to get on.
Perhaps this was a mistake, because less than a second later he heard a high-pitched voice shout “Wait!”
Jason sighed disappointedly and pressed the button that would open the doors.
He might not have been in the mood for company, but he wasn’t an asshole.
...Okay, whatever. He wasn’t a total asshole.
The girl ran into the elevator after a short while, cheeks flushed from running.
As she stuttered out a thanks, Jason subtly observed her.
She looked a little young to be working at Wayne Enterprises, and her outfit looked much more “picnic date” than it did the formal attire most wore.
There were only a few around her age that worked at WE, none of which whose significant other would have an access card to the building (other than Tim, that is, but there was no way the Replacement had a girlfriend.)
Maybe she was a daughter of one of the employees, then.
The elevator space soon filled up with boxes, and they were forced to do an awkward shuffle to compensate.
A minute later, the girl was unceremoniously shoved into him.
The sweet smell of vanilla and strawberries—subtle yet perceptible—hit his nose, and Jason glanced down.
He could really only see the top of the girl’s head due to their proximity, but her body language screamed discomfort.
So he backed himself up into the elevator wall as much as he possibly could, whispering a sorry and cursing his tall build all the while.
She was admittedly cute, but he’d be damned if he was the prick who pressed himself up against girls without their enthusiastic consent.
The ride was spent with bated breath, and one elevator stop later, Jason found himself walking to Bruce’s office and kicking in the door.
There was a brief silence as it swung back and forth from the momentum; the older simply sighed tiredly and gestured to the chair across from him.
“Have a seat.”
Jason glanced at the black office chair, then at the door as if he were about to suddenly bolt, and then back at the chair. He seemed to think the better of making a hasty escape and grudgingly walked forward, though not without rolling his eyes.
So fucking dramatic.
“What,” he repeated once he had sat himself down.
Bruce just stared at him, hands in a steeple position. It was no doubt an intimidation move; he had seen Batman use the same on Arkham villains.
Jason met his gaze unflinchingly. If he wanted a staring contest, that’s what he’d get.
“Tim has a…friend coming over.”
The silence was broken with slow words, spoken in an almost careful manner.
“Okay. Why’d you have to call me here to tell me that?”
Blunt and to-the-point as always.
“I’m an adult, Bruce. I don’t need a lecture about being on my best behavior. Damian might, though,” he added as an afterthought.
Bruce sighed again and wow was he was doing a lot of sighing today. He really was melodramatic.
“I wasn’t going to lecture you, Jason. I just wanted you to know so you could be prepared.”
“Oh.”
The silence was palpable as an air of awkwardness settled around the two, and Jason sat there fighting the urge to shift in his seat before speaking.
“So is that it?”
“Yes.”
He stood abruptly at the dismissal, pushing in his chair as if he couldn’t wait to get out of there. Well, he did want to get out of there.
With one hand he smoothly opened the heavy door, prepared to leave, but he stopped in his tracks when Bruce spoke once more.
“Jason?”
“What?” he asked, with considerably less annoyance than the first two times.
“...I’m proud of you, lad.”
Jason tried to suppress his shock at the statement, but he wouldn’t be surprised if his facial expression betrayed him.
Despite the somewhat-steady in their family dynamics the past few years, they were still an emotionally constipated bunch.
Jason couldn’t remember the last time someone said those words to him; they meant more to him than he’d reveal.
But because he was a part of the emotionally constipated Wayne family, he settled for an offhand “Yeah, yeah,” before closing the door and walking out.
There was a ghost of a smile on his lips, and the warmth in his heart was one he hadn’t felt in a while, but he could deal with all those emotions later—for now, he had a book to get to.
PERMANENT TAGLIST @avengerthewarrior *@bluesimani @enternalempires @flower-girll @freesportspalacesalad @glastwime859 @h1sss @heart-charming @jalaluvsu @kitsunebell @maskedpainter @moongoddesskiana @nathleigh @too0bsessedformyowngood
ELEVATOR LOVE TAGLIST *@bluesimani @buginetye @bumblebeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee @ichigorose @iloontjeboontje @laurcad123 @moonlightstar64 @roguishredaxion
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bangtansbun · 3 years
Text
Endgame || Feels Right
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pairing: jeongguk x f. reader
genre: angst, a little fluff
word count: 3k
warnings: casual drinking, heavy make out sesh
a/n: thank you for waiting for this you guys!! I know i was meant to post this on thursday, but it was the end of my term and it was just overall a crazy week last week. I really don’t like giving you guys half assed written parts so i hope you didn’t mind the wait! also, listen to delicate but tswift with this chapter. unedited
Minnie was thirty minutes away from picking you up and you weren’t even dressed yet. What the hell were you supposed to wear to possibly see your ex/love of your life/childhood best friend?? You had to look good, you knew that, but you also didn’t want to look like you were trying too hard. You stand in front of your closet for a little while longer before you’re letting out a huff and pulling out a suede moto jacket. While inspecting the jacket, your phone goes off with a text from Jimin stating that he was now only twenty minutes away. Without anymore thinking – because if you thought any longer about it you’d be showing up to the bar in nothing but the jacket – you grab a slightly sheer white top, a blue lacy bralette to peek count from under it, ripped jeans, and some charcoal grey suede heeled boots. As you look at yourself in the mirror you realize that this is 100% the type of outfit that Jeongguk would love to see you in. Your mission in looking effortless had failed, but you did like the way you looked in your outfit, definitely gave you a boost of confidence before Jimin’s knocking on your door.
The ride to the first place of the night isn’t too long. The two of you decided to grab something to eat at a restaurant (along with a few drinks because you’d need the liquid courage later) so that you aren’t dancing and drinking on empty stomachs. It was also partially because you weren’t quite ready for the possibility of seeing Jeongguk again. You didn’t even really know if he would be there, but just the possibility of him being there again and Jimin without a doubt pushing you to go talk to him has your stomach in knots.
The two of you order your meals and a glass of wine to go with it, easy chit chat flowing as you wait for your food. “So, are you ready for tonight?” He asks with a wiggle of his eyebrows. “We don’t even know if he’ll be there, but the answer is no. Why would I ever be ready for something like this?” you ask incredulously. He lets out a sigh before answering you, “oh, come on. You really thought you’d never see him again? You guys grew up in the same town and had one of those fairytale kind of loves, which is fucking incredible.” He had a small point, but you felt like your love was anything but fairytale-like. It all burning down in the midst of one of the worst times of his life. You ignore his actual question, “it’s just a little scary, okay? I don’t really know him anymore.” He nods in understanding. Jimin may be brave and outspoken, but he’d never push you too far, understands what you’re going through.
Your food arrives and the two of you munch in comfortable silence. The lack of conversation isn’t because of the topic that was brought up, but purely because the food is just that good at this Italian estaurant. While you didn’t love talking about your past with Jeongguk, Jimin was your best friend and you guys told each other everything, nothing was a secret or off limits. Jimin takes the last bite of his three cheese tortellini, an mmm coming out of him before he wipes his mouth and looks you dead in the eyes, “alright, you ready?” Unfortunately for him, the answer was no and you begged him to take you guys to another bar before going to the one he’d most likely be at. You just weren’t ready to face the music yet (not really sure you’d ever be, but you could sure prolong it).
Jimin didn’t really mind too much though, you guys hadn’t been to this bar in a while and it was nice to have a change of scenery. You both swayed to the music rhythmically, taking swigs of your drinking every now and then. Jimin was the best person to go out with because even though he constantly had men and women hangin off of him or wanting to dance with him, he never left your side unless you were pushing him to do so. Dancing with you and making sure you were having a good time was always as much of a priority for him as it was for you. You would be content staying right here, just like this for the rest of the night.
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“Come on, man. I don’t think she’s coming, it’s already 11pm and we’ve seen no sign of her,” Taehyung says in exhaustion. In his defense, he had had a long day at work and he wasn’t really helping with the fact that anytime Tae suggested to dance he turned it down. Not wanting to move from his spot angled perfectly to see the entrance in case he missed you. “You don’t know yn like I do, she could stay up all night long if she wanted to. Plus, weren’t you excited to see her friend again?” Taehyung nods along hesitantly, “yeah, but that was when I thought they would actually be here and so far, they’re not.” Jungkook gets it, Taehyung wants to support him, but he’s also worried about him getting his hopes up (and ultimately, hearty broken). Doesn’t want to see his friend acting so desperate. “Alright, I’ll stay a little bit longer, but if they’re not here in the next thirty minutes, I’m heading home. I’m beat from work and I gotta get some sleep.” Jungkook nods in understanding and, honestly, he might prefer if Tae leaves because then if yn does show up he doesn’t have to feel bad about leaving him to the wayside while he tries to win you back.
In an effort to try to make Taehyung’s night a little more enjoyable, Jeongguk heads over to the bar to grab them some drinks and then abandons his coveted seat to go dance with his friend. He actually finds that he has a good time, letting his mind wander to things other than you because if he was really being honest with himself, he was scared. Scared that you wouldn’t want him back, that you hated him and never wanted to see him again. He’d deserve it too, for how he ended things with you – or actually, how he didn’t properly end things with you. However, he’s not letting himself dwell on these things for too long while he moves to the best of the music.
Taehyung does end up leaving eventually, but not as soon as he said he would because he ended up having fun once Jeongguk got out of his head a little bit. He apologized for needing to dip out, but Jeongguk understood his friend’s need for sleep and the fact that it was probably unlikely at this point that yn would actually show up. Jeongguk decided that he’ll probably leave within the next hour too, doesn’t want to humiliate himself anymore than he has to.
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Much to your dismay, you and Jimin are finally on the way to the bar that you were meant to be at all night. Jimin bribed you on the fact that it’s already almost midnight and the two of you had decided earlier that you wouldn’t stay out past 1am, so it’s not like you would be there that long. Plus, if he was there, he’s probably left already since it’s getting pretty late.
When you guys arrive you can feel yourself beginning to fill with nerves. Your stomach turning and twisting at the thought of having to go in. “Don’t worry, baby. No matter what happens, you still have me and we can leave at any moment,” Jimin offers to you, and God, he is the best friend you could ever ask for.
He knows you miss Guk so much, miss the love you two used to the share, but even more so, the friendship that ran so deep between the two of you. He just wants you to be happy with the man of your dreams and he knows the only way for that to be possible is to take this chance.
He holds your hand as you walk in, turning around with a smirk on his face, “you think he brought his hot friend with him?” This makes you laugh because Jimin is shameless and will 100% jump Taehyung if he’s here with Jeongguk. You feel lighter now.
Upon first glance, you don’t see him or Taehyung anywhere and you feel your shoulders relax – had been carrying the tension there for probably the last hour. The two of you make your way to find seats on a swanky blue velvet couch before Jimin heads his way over to the bar to grab drinks.
Unbeknownst to you, you had walked right past Jeongguk. He was seated at the bar by the entryway, his back to you as you passed by. He was preoccupied with paying out his tab and hadn’t notice you come in. Luckily for him though, a certain plump-lipped pretty boy is standing next to him ordering drinks for two just before he was about to head home for the night, and he recognizes him instantly.
Before saying anything, he quickly turns around to scan the room. He wants to see if you’re actually here before looking like a lunatic to your friend. It takes maybe 30 seconds before he spots you and his stomach does a flip. He turns back to your friend just as the bartender is handing him drinks and gently taps his shoulder, “hey, are you here with yn?” Jimin’s eyes go so wide and he almost drops the drinks from pure shock. “You’re him!! Guk right?” Jimin practically screams. Jeongguk can tell right away that he’s pretty drunk which means you might be too, but he’ll feel out the situation once he gets over to you. Before he can even reply, Jimin’s grabbing him by the wrist and pulling him over to you. He’s so proud of himself for finding Guk, but the look on your face has him questioning everything.
The second you lay eyes on him, all color goes from your face. It’s like seeing a ghost from your past and you don’t know what to do. Your heart is beating so fast you’re afraid he’ll actually be able to hear it over the raging bass.
He’s gorgeous.
Not that he ever wasn’t, but it’s been five years. You guys have both changed so much and you weren’t sure what adult Guk would look like, but he’s stunning and you’re nervous because there’s no way a guy like him doesn’t have a girlfriend. You feel stupid because his post probably wasn’t even for you. Or maybe he just wants to catch up and be friends, nothing more.
“Hey,” he says in his most gentle voice, afraid you’ll run off based on the expression on your face. You shake your head quickly and force a smile onto your face, “hi.” You both stand there for a minute just staring at each other, you have no idea what to say. Jimin’s the one to speak next, “Okayyy, well, I’m gonna go dance with that cutie over there. Come get me if you need me, yn.” And just in principle, he shoots Jeongguk a look as if to say do anything to her and I’ll murder you.
Jeongguk slowly sits down next to you, “h-how are you?” His cute stutter loosens you up a little bit, you know that he only stutters when he’s nervous and it’s good to know that he’s just as nervous as you are. “I’m doing okay. How have you been?” You pause for a moment before saying the next part, “it’s been such a long time.” A sullen look takes over Jeongguk’s face and it makes your heart clench. He realizes that you’re not quite as drunk as your friend so he decides to just go for it, “I know and I’m really sorry about that. I- I really wanted to say I’m sorry to you. I saw you in here last weekend and I only just saw you before you left, but I immediately wanted to apologize. I shouldn’t have left things the way I did-” you’re quick to cut him off. “No, I mean, I get it. You don’t need to apologize.” But he’s shaking his head at you. “No, I do because I loved you and I shouldn’t have just disappeared on you. I really thought I couldn’t handle everything that was going on with me and be in a relationship, but it hurt more without you. I- I just didn’t know how to fix things and so I just let it go. But it hurt and I know I hurt you too.” He’s staring at you so intensely. Not that you would ever think Jeongguk would lie to you, but you can tell he really wants you to see how sorry he is about the situation. You keep hanging on to one word though, loved. Past tense.
You nod slowly at him, “yeah, it stung a little bit, but I just wanted you to do what you needed. I don’t have any hard feelings about it.” Your response is an understatement because it took you years to get over him, but now that he’s sitting right in front of you, seemingly as sweet as ever, you’re not so sure you really ever did. He gives you a small smile, but there’s still sadness behind it. “So, uh, who is-” he looks over in Jimin’s direction. He wants to feel out whether you’re seeing anyone or not, although, Jeongguk’s quite sure the guy you’re with is just your friend based on the way he dragged him over to you. “Oh! Um, that’s Jimin. I met him through work.” Something flickers in your eyes which as Jeongguk questioning his instincts, but it’s really just a fondness you have for your best friend. “Ah, I see, so you too are-” and you’re quick to correct him, “no, no, we’re just really good friends.” Relief, that’s the look that he gives you at his answer and it causes a swell of butterflies in your stomach. “Can I get you something to drink?” you give him a nod because Jimin had taken your drink with him on the dance floor, double fisting as he sways to the music.
The rest of the night is spent with the two of you catching up on the past five years. You realize that the two of you have changed a lot and are different in ways you wouldn’t have thought, but deep down you’re both the same two kids that fell in love with each other way back when. Jeongguk is still just as caring, considerate, and sweet as he always was. You also learn that he’s single which has you feeling things you didn’t think you’d feel tonight.
You’re both sitting close to each other now, getting tipsier and tipsier by the minute. He still makes you laugh and he still hasn’t gotten over how the sound of your laugh makes him melt. Especially considering he’s the one making you laugh. Your knees are touching and you can feel the warmth from his arm as he leans in to you to tell you something that halppened to him the other day. Your hold body seems to react to his closeness. His eyes still sparkle like they did when he was young and his mouth still forms that cute pout that you so desperately want to kiss. Before you know it, he catches you staring at him. “What?” he asks a little dumbly. His face is close to yours now and if you just leaned a little closer, he would get the hint, but you don’t move at all. Instead, he’s the one to make the first move, wrapping his arm around your waist, pulling you a bit closer until his lips are hovering over yours. Like he’s not sure if this is okay, but he wants to do it. And you want him to do it too. You give a slight nod to indicate that it’s okay and he immediately closes in.
The feeling you get when his lips are slotted against yours is almost indescribable. The best way to describe it is that it just feels right. Like you should have been doing this for the past five years. Like no time has passed between the two of you at all. Only difference is that now you can smell his cologne and his hair is longer, allowing you to gently tug of the ends of them while you explore each other’s mouths. He’s completely and totally drinking you in, he didn’t realize just how much he missed kissing you until this very moment and now he’s not sure he ever wants to stop. “I’ve missed you so much,” he says breathlessly in between kisses. You moan in response which he swallows down, he knows you must have missed him too. Your heart and your head are clouded with feelings and you’re so confused as to what all of this means, but you don’t let yourself dwell on it right now. You just want to enjoy how it feels to have your lips sliding against his, the swipe of his tongue against your own.
You’re not sure how long the two of you carry on like that, but you’re practically gasping for air when Jimin pulls you apart saying that he’s getting tired and wants to go home soon. A sorry on his lips at having to interrupt the two of you, but it was late and the two of you had already agreed on when you’d head home for the night. You clumsily get off of Jeongguk’s lap and give him and apologetic smile as you walk off with your best friend. The forethought to ask if his number is still the same not even a blip on your radar. He realizes this just a moment too late because you’re already out the door and getting into the car you and Jimin had arranged to pick you up at this time. He’s not too worried though, he’ll find a way to reach you again. He has to.
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waatermelon-sugaar · 3 years
Text
Half-Priced Chocolate
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Words = 2.8k
Summary = You hate Valentine’s Day. Nick tries to change your mind. 
Warnings = One swear word
A/N = Reader is described as a similar height to Nick, and taller when she wears heels. Also I didn’t mean to write this, it just sort of happened so sorry if it’s not very well thought out ahaha
Posted to AO3
Masterlist
***
“You know, I’d pegged you as the type of girl who would do anything to ensure she had a Valentine’s date.” This observation comes casual as anything from your boss, Mayor Wasicsko, as the two of you work together to build beds in the town hall. 
A combination of a lot of snow, an early thaw, and then rain, had resulted in flooding all around the city, many having to be relocated. And so here you were, on a night that most were celebrating with their loved one across an over-priced bottle of champagne, some heart-shaped chocolate and probably something red themed, in the town hall, setting up extra accommodation with Nick. 
Who you should probably call Mayor Wasicsko in your head. 
You’d been here for hours, first building the beds with other volunteers, all of whom had melted away as the night had gone on. All, apart from you and Nick.
“Yeah? Well I pegged you as the type of mayor to sit on his ass all day.” You snipe back, not thinking for a moment, before slapping a hand to your mouth in horror. “Sorry, Mayor Wasicsko, that was really unprofessional of me-”
You stopped your rambling, because … was he laughing?
You flip your end of the sheet the two of you are attempting to fit to the bed, successfully causing his end to yank out of his hands, flying up and causing enough of a breeze to dislodge his hair enough for a strand to flop onto his forehead. 
Not that you’d noticed. 
“I told you, call me Nick. And it’s ok,” he’s still smiling, annoyingly. “I just - you don’t have some annoyed boyfriend who’s sitting at home waiting for you?” 
You shake your head. “Not that it’s any of your business, but no.” You finally tuck in the corner of the sheet at the top of the bed and move to the bottom. “And anyway, I hate Valentine’s.” 
Nick throws you a pillow and a case when you hold your arms out. “So you hate love? And happiness?” 
You roll your eyes at him, busy stuffing the case, leaving him to struggle with the duvet, gathering the new sheets for the next bed as you talk. “No. I just … I hate the commercialisation of it.” 
You wait for Nick to finish with the duvet, before attempting the next bed. “It’s like … so what? If my hypothetical boyfriend doesn’t get me flowers, and chocolate and some shitty card on this one specific day of the year, he doesn’t love me?” You scoff. “No thanks.” 
Nick tucks in his corner, thinking about his response. “I think it reminds people to be thankful for the people they love.” Oh God he’s one of those. As if he hasn’t managed to drop in the fact that he’s woefully single for the last two hours whenever the opportunity arose.
“Only romantic love,” you remind him. “And,” you continue, remembering more and more reasons. “It’s all over-priced anyway, and it’s just so couples can feel smug while they walk hand in hand down the street, trying to get a table to a restaurant, where the prices have been upped for two people, and so single people, specifically women, can feel shit about themselves?” 
You harrumph again, handing Nick the other end of the sheet. “There is good about it though.” He’s looking at you differently, and you’re not sure how, but maybe it’s because you’re having the first real conversation with him tonight, despite having worked for him for the last year. 
You’d talked before, of course, but it usually had something to do with politics, Nick ducking out of his office to ask your opinion on something, before returning back to his phone and papers. It had never been a two-way conversation like this, never nothing to do with either of your jobs. 
You raise an eyebrow, tucking in your corners as you wait for him to make his point. “What about the half-priced chocolate the next day?” And … he nearly has you. Until you remember a counter-argument.  
“So it’s back to its normal price?” 
Nick looks at you like he’s never seen you before in your life. But he changes tack, which you take to mean that you’ve won that particular battle. 
“And what’s wrong with celebrating love? Even-” He anticipates your response before you do, “-if it is just romantic love?” He grabs the pillow before you can, leaving you to struggle with the duvet this time. 
You’re smiling now, unable to help yourself, as you watch the Mayor of Yonkers, of all people, pick up a pile of bedding. He looks good like this, you think, shirt rolled up to his forearms, collar open, tie left behind somewhere with his jacket. Not that he doesn’t normally look good. 
You’ve become more relaxed too, you can feel it, as though every bed that the two of you have completed has shod you of another layer, making you feel lighter. Your heels are by the door, and you are a similar height to Nick without them, which you’ve never noticed before, either being taller than him, or sitting in his presence. There’s something weird about it, but also nice, in a domestic sort of way, as your stocking feet pad around the beds, occasionally catching on the wooden floor. You hope you don’t get a hole. Or worse, a ladder. 
But you know it’s your mind which has relaxed the most. Allowing you first to smile at his jokes, then joke back, the tension in your shoulders melting away. And now this. A deep conversation. Which you suppose was bound to happen, the two of you alone after the last volunteer had called it a night at 1am and gone home. But love? Really? 
“There’s nothing wrong with celebrating love. It’s just forced, somehow. Like you’re a bad person for not doing it, just because of some long-dead guy who’s now in our calendar.” You finish your duvet, and move to help Nick. 
“I think you’re wrong.” And maybe it’s the way he says it, like it’s the most simple thing in the world. “I think it makes sure that people take a breath and appreciate what they have.” 
He looks so hopeful, you stop the scoff in your throat, instead letting yourself consider his point. “Well it doesn’t matter, it’s …” You pause and check your watch, blinking in surprise. “Fuck. It’s four in the morning. It’s not Valentine’s Day anymore.” 
And then you look up. Properly. 
There’s one bed left. You turn around, admiring all the made-up beds. Ok they could be neater, but so what? 
“Well.” You turn back to look at Nick as he speaks. “Do you want to take advantage of those sales, or not?” 
You blink at him, even as he gestures at you to take the other end of the sheet, unsure if you’re dreaming now. 
***
When you exit the town hall, the sky is the cool blue of pre-dawn. Grey clouds still hang, heavy and angry over Yonkers, a precursor of the rain to come. It’s been a cold night, a glimmer of frost on the ground, but you can already feel that it won’t last the day.
You yawn, rubbing your eyes with one hand, while your other holds your heels. Nick’s thrown his blazer over one shoulder, the tie hanging out of his trouser pocket. “C’mon.” Is all he says as he walks towards his car. 
It takes a second for your brain to engage. “What?” Your voice has become hoarse from a lack of sleep.
“Can I show you something?” And how can you say no, when he leans against the car roof with one arm, opening the door for you, and looking like that?
Inside the car it’s warm, and tiredness sinks down on you until you can hardly keep your eyes open. Nick only asks for your address, which you give him, and then you’re asleep. You wake when he stops the car on the high street, but fall back asleep when he tells you he just needs to pick up some groceries. 
You don’t wake up when he comes back, nor do you wake up when he sets off again. You open your eyes when he gently shakes your shoulder. The sky is much brighter now, the sun peeking over the horizon and you blink, looking at your watch. It’s nearly 7. Which means Nick let you sleep for 2 hours. It takes a second for your surroundings to fall into place, green and brown surrounding you.
Nick’s sitting next to you in the driver’s seat. And in the back seat are his groceries. 
You blink again. Harder this time.
Praying your makeup isn’t smudged all down your cheek, you move to sit up straighter, where you’d fallen asleep against the window. “What … where are we?” 
Nick doesn’t answer until he’s grabbed one of the bags, clambering out and opening your door for you. “We are in one of the city’s finest parks.” He announces, using his Official Mayor Voice.
As far as you can tell, it’s a pretty basic park. The only notable point is the view. You can see the full scrawl of Yonkers below you, as the sun rises to your right, still fighting the storm clouds left over from yesterday. Funny. You’d heard there was going to be more rain. 
As you step out of the car, you put your heels back on, and wince a little. Nick hands you a blanket to carry and sets off towards a clear area without too many trees, and you follow him, spreading the blanket for the two of you to sit on. Nick’s put his blazer back on and you try not to be disappointed, reminding yourself that he’s your boss. 
He places the bag between you, and … it’s stuffed with half price Valentine themed food. Chocolates, champagne, even a small teddy. You can’t help it. You let out a laugh as the two of you sit next to each other, the bag between you. 
“I never knew the Mayor would be a cheapskate.” You’re only half-serious, and you think Nick knows this, catching the glint in his eye as he replies. 
“You’d rather I bought you this full price?”
You shake your head, grinning, but confused on the inside. You must be tired. Hearing that the Mayor, your boss, wants to buy you something for Valentine’s? You must be misinterpreting this. 
“And I’ll have you know, that everything in this bag came to less than what it would be in a normal month.” He winks and you groan, theatrical and over the top. 
So instead you open the chocolate, grabbing the first one you see and popping it in your mouth. “Nice though,” you mumble, without having swallowed your mouthful, savouring the sweetness of it as it coats your tongue, eyes closing as you lean back on the blanket, missing the way Nick looks down at you. 
“Yeah? Worth every cent, aren’t they?” You smile, shaking your head. 
“Yes, Nick.” You finally sigh, giving in. “Worth every half-price cent.” You squint open an eye, waiting for his reaction, glad when he laughs, propping yourself up onto your elbows so you don't fall asleep again. And then you look down, and your eye catches on a bottle of champagne. 
You reach for it, twirling it on the ground. “So Nick, seeing as how you’re the Mayor and my boss,” you start, sure you’re going to get what you ask for, “and we worked all night long, can we have today off?”
You look at Nick to see him watching your face, amused at the long winded way you’re going about this. Finally he nods. “Yeah I think we deserve the day off.” 
You grin widely then, sitting up properly with a burst of energy, and pop the cork. You take the first sip straight from the bottle, leaving a small ring of lipstick behind. You use your thumb to wipe it off before passing it over, the bubbles still tingling on your tongue, washing away the chocolate. 
Nick takes a healthy swig as soon as his hand is wrapped around the cool bottle, and you can’t help but watch the way his throat bobs when he swallows, wiping at a drop that escapes his mouth. 
You turn to the rest of the bag to distract yourself. There’s at least 3 boxes of chocolate, a pack of strawberries, and a small bear. All of them have the tell tale yellow half-price stickers in clear view. You pull out the bear, amused. “He’s cute.” 
Nick hands the bottle back to you, running a hand through his hair. “Got a name for him?” 
You think about it for a minute, before deciding. “Arthur the Fourth.” And you place Arthur at the bottom of the blanket, so he’s looking at the two of you. 
Nick frowns, looking between the two of you. “The Fourth?” 
You laugh, biting on another chocolate. “Yeah. Throughout my childhood, I have had three other teddies, all named Arthur. He will be the fourth.” 
“And you lost them all?” 
“No, I still have Arthur the Third.”  You wash the chocolate down with another sip of champagne, and when you go to scrub away your lipstick again, Nick’s hand stops you. He shakes his head, like he’s having a secret conversation within your public one. 
“Shame to hear about the first two though.” You let him take the bottle from you, watching as he - his mouth - touches your lipstick. You can feel your heart rate raise, thumping inside your chest like a drum. You can still feel the ghost of his hand, warm where it touched yours. 
You look down on Yonkers again, unable to cope. “Yeah, well. It’s how it happens in real life, I guess.” 
The two of you fall silent as the sun climbs pathetically further and further, finally disappearing behind angry storm clouds. Conversation is quiet observations, both of you feeling wrapped up in a bubble of tiredness. 
You lie back down, ignoring how the cold of the ground is seeping through the blanket now and closing your eyes as you take a chocolate from the box which you intend to be your last, and you can hear Nick’s smirk when he talks. “Chocolate’s not too bad then?” 
You just hum, pretending to think about it. “Yeah not bad,” you finally agree, opening your eyes and turning your head to watch Nick as he leans back on his hands, “But it’s not Valentine’s day so you haven’t changed my mind …” 
And Nick’s looking at you like that again, and you could never in a million years anticipate his next question. “So you wouldn’t count this as the best Valentine’s Day date you’ve ever been on?” 
You freeze, what? You decline in that moment to mention that it’s the only Valentine’s date you’ve ever even been on, and you also choose to ignore that it’s not Valentine’s Day anymore, shaking your head. You can’t quite believe what you’re about to say, heart beating faster than normal, blood thrumming in your ears. “I would count it as the best date I’ve been on.” 
And then you’re laughing at the look of shock on his face, quickly stopping when he ducks down to kiss you. 
Nick, your boss, the mayor of Yonkers, is kissing you. 
It takes you a second to respond, shock freezing you where you lie. But then your hands are on his neck, pulling him back down over you as he deepens the kiss, tongue exploring your mouth. His forearm is resting on the blanket next to your head, supporting his bodyweight, his other hand cupping your cheek. His moustache is tickling you slightly, but you don’t care. 
He tastes sweet, from the chocolate. But then, you can taste the bubbles from the champagne, you can taste how cold it was, you can taste the birds chirping in the trees above you, and you can taste how warm the sun’s rays felt five minutes ago.
It’s perfect.
Until the clouds open above you.
It starts gently, and you don’t feel it at first, and when you do, you ignore it, more interested in snogging Nick. Your feet are becoming wet quickly and the rain falls in large drops. 
Nick’s the first one to pull away, and you follow him, chasing his lips with your own, not wanting to open your eyes. When you do, you realise your feet are wet from the bottle of champagne falling over, and Arthur’s looking to be in danger of rolling away. 
You can feel the rain on your head, and the drops are falling faster. You snatch Arthur and the now-empty bottle up, Nick scrambling to get everything back in the bag. At the last second, you ball up the blanket, ignoring how it brings half the floor with it, and the two of you run towards Nick’s car, laughing as the rain soaks the pair of you. 
***
Thanks for reading! Reblog and comments mean the world to me 🥰🥰🥰
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tatooedlaura-blog · 3 years
Text
Max 2.0
post-Max. Because the car is the best place to deal with crises of being and pseudo-bad grammar ...
Our Moment Chapter 1: Five Words (post-Leonard Betts) Chapter 2: Sidebar Nonsense (post-Memento Mori) Chapter 3: Interim (floating somewhere around Unrequited) Chapter 4: Max 2.0 (post-Tempus Fugit/Max)
@today-in-fic
&&&&&&&&&&
Out of her bed and halfway down the hall before she opened her eyes, she stopped by the couch, realizing she had no idea why she was out of bed. Vague notions of her gun crossed her mind but then she heard a knock. Wavering for another moment or two in full-on sleep mode, she shook her head lightly, tried to pry her eyes open, then regretted it, eyelids stuck together, burning, dry; another knock.
She wondering in passing how long he’d been out there but finally summoning the brain power to move her legs again, she made it to the door. Peering out at him through the peephole, she yawned, then unlocked the door, pulling it open, squinting at the glaring hall light, “you okay?”
Now, he’d known she would probably be asleep, had to be asleep given it was nearly 1am, but that didn’t stop him from being surprised by her pillow-creased face and unfocused eyes, “yeah, um, I’m now realizing this was stupid. You’re asleep. I should be asleep. I’m sorry.” Not turning away, however, hoping if he stood there long enough, she’d invite him in, “I’m sorry.”
Scully knew him like no other and stepping aside, “come on in.”
He did, leaving shoes and coat on, standing, filling, overwhelming the area he stood in, doorframe small behind him, “thanks.” Folding arms, not in that annoyed way of hers but in the ‘I’m trying to hold in a yawn so I will stupidly think that crossing them will keep it from rising to the surface’. It did not work and Mulder sighed, apologizing again, “I’m sorry.”
“Are you okay?”
“I just … I can’t stop thinking about Max and the plane and just … he was me, Scully, and that’s bothering me more than I thought it would.”
“Would you like some tea?”
Reaching out, he touched her hand, the one not tucked under her elbow, proceeding to play with her knuckles, the hem of her sleeve, twisting the thermal fabric between his fingers, “I was actually wondering if maybe you’d like to go for a drive with me?”
It had been over a month since their Tennessee drive but the memories were clear and nodding, she gave him a small smile before extracting herself from his fingers, “just let me go grab a coat.” Disappearing, then reappearing quickly, she had one of his zipped sweatshirts over her shoulders, thick socks firmly in place and feet shoved in soled slippers, “ready.”
“Do you steal all my clothes?”
“Only the good ones.”
Soon in the car, they were off, quiet between them broken a minute later, “your car’s clean.”
“It happens.”
“Not often.”
Shrugging, he turned right, then left, the left again, the city night passing by them in an unnoticed blur. He seemed to have a destination in mind and asking if he did, Mulder told her, “no. I just want to get out of the city and I know this is the fastest way.”
“Understood.”
Because it was late and dark and she was tired and loose-limbed, she folded her legs under, folded hands in her lap.
She baited the hook to see if he’d bite.
He did, his hand sliding across the center irritation of a console, fingers wedging once again in the fold between bended knee and adjacent thigh. He knew she’d done it on purpose.
Neither cared.
The connection made them both feel better and Mulder, squeezing her leg lightly, “sorry I don’t have a moonroof for you.”
“It’s cloudy anyways and there’s no moon, so I’ll forgive you this time.”
“Thanks.”
She gave it awhile, the pair of them well out of the city lights, darkness prevailing before, “you’re not like Max. I mean, you are, but not in the ways you’re dwelling on.”
“But I am like him.”
“We’re all Max in our own ways. I mean, we have passions and hopes and problems and dreams but some of us fixate on them to the point where it’s their only hope, their only passion and it becomes their biggest problem.”
He moved to pull his hand away but she grabbed it, holding tight, as he spoke, “I am the poster boy now that he’s gone, Scully. I am Max 2.0.”
Twisting, she refolded her legs so they both vee’d in his direction, able to look at him better that way, turn to see him easier. Putting his hand back between her knees, she moved to hold his lower arm, firmly, trying to get her point across with words as well as tactile pressure, “if you were anything like Max, obsession-wise, I’d be long gone. You have passion, Mulder, he had fixation. There’s a vast difference.”
“Not that vast.”
“There is in my mind. Max wouldn’t be here right now, taking a midnight drive with his … partner,” that was an odd hesitation she wasn’t expecting, “he’d be in his trailer, trying to decode the conspiracies of the universe.”
“The Gunmen are probably doing that as we speak.”
“But Langley also cooks a mean prime rib, Byers plays Majhong on Friday nights with a group of semi-normal people, Frohike crochets blankets for the Veterans Hospital and has a 22-year old penpal in Denmark. These people have other interests. From what we saw and heard about Max, while he was a very nice man, he didn’t do any of that.”
“You know about the crocheting?”
“Have you seen the granny-square afghan on my couch? The one you like to snuggle with when you’re tired and don’t want to drive home? That’s Frohike’s handiwork from last Christmas.”
Suddenly, the world didn’t seem quite so down on him after all but he still felt something he couldn’t shake. Ignoring that, however, for the moment, he scoffed, “he’s never made me a blanket, that yarn-wielding bastard.”
“I’ll drop a hint next time I see him.” Feeling the tension leaving him slowly, Scully began moving her left hand up his arm, around the back, to lightly rub the underside of his bicep, other hand splayed around his wrist. It was an unconscious thing at first, then, noticing it, she decided she liked it and stayed. “Do you think there’s any hot chocolate out here in the sticks?”
Looking at the houses still visible from the road they were on, more spaced apart than a few minutes ago but still numerous, “you’ve been living in the city too long if you think this is the sticks.”
“You call it the city; I call it a severe lack of 24-hour dining possibilities with hot chocolate necessities.”
“You’re wordy today. Did you snack on a dictionary before going to bed?”
“Is that your polite way of telling me to quit mouthing off?”
And now her mouth was foremost on his mind.
Dammit.
“I have M&Ms in the glove compartment. Is that a good enough compromise?”
Retrieving the candy post-haste, she popped one in her mouth, then offered him one, “sugar?”
“Sure. Why not?”
Both chewing, Scully returned to her previous position, “peanut. I approve.”
Continuing on, they covered all kinds of light subjects, music, family, things they visited often but both always enjoyed, especially hearing about the antics of Scully’s extended family, brothers, cousin, bevy of nieces and nephews. After one exuberant story about Sam, second oldest of the bunch, Mulder wiped his eyes, tears of laughter blurring his vision, “how did you land all these people? I mean, you have the cast of some off-beat comedy show and I’ve got my mother.”
He hadn’t meant to bring the atmosphere down and Scully didn’t want to keep it there but she had to tell him, in words he apparently didn’t hear the first seven times she told him, “you realize my mother has adopted you right? I mean, there may not be paperwork but there’s pie. Also, just to let you know, do you remember when you were asking me about my mom’s dentist appointment, about her infected tooth last week?”
“Yeah?”
“I had no idea she was having any issues but I pretended to know because, good Lord, Mulder, you knew about it and I didn’t.” Giving him that look that made his smile return, “does that tell you anything about the level of your acceptance into my family?”
“I mean,” looking almost sheepish, “she called to talk to you and I answered and we just …”
Patting his shoulder, “it’s okay, Mulder. My mother can love you more than me occasionally. I don’t mind.”
His eyebrow went up, about to bring down the grammar hammer on her, hard, “you love me? I had no idea. When did this happen? Was it after I introduced you to the Conundrum or, ooh, I bet is was around the time you were trapped with me in Alaska. That tiny room? Checking for murderous prehistoric alien worms?”
Total confusion all over her face, “What?”
“You said occasionally, your mother loved me more than you. So, I deduce that you love me most of the time and now I’m trying to figure out when that all started.”
Fuck.
Oh, hell, why not just play along?
“I’m pretty sure it was when you were about to head into the hospital with Modell: looking up at me with that camera on your head, Kevlar all tight, panicked look in your eye.”
Wait … was she humoring him? He was treading into the unknown now, not sure if he should keep going, “um … what?”
Her laughter bounced around the interior of the car, a happy sound, a light sound he hadn’t heard in awhile, “nervous, Mr. Mulder?”
Smiling himself finally, “just … left-field line drive came in a little faster than I expected.”
“Are we back to baseball again?”
He was going to crash the car in the next two minutes if this kept up, “I think we should just drive in silence for a minute. My brain did something and just … give me a minute.”
Fuck again.
She was pretty sure with one joke, two follow-ups and a mention of baseball, she’d quite possibly changed the course of their relationship in ways she had no understanding of. Silence nerve-wracking, she fumbled for words, “I’m just glad the two of you get along so well. It’ll make things easier.”
She’d never felt atmosphere shift like it did in that moment, the air hardening between them. Mulder looked at her, any trace of humor gone from his face, “make what easier?”
“If … if something happens to me. I’ll feel better knowing … you’d … have each other, I guess.”
Mulder steered roughly to the left, blew through a stop sign, then pulled them into a large, dark parking lot, a high school if Scully read the sign correctly as Mulder raced past. Hitting the breaks, he threw the car into park, got out and slammed the door, leaving Scully stunned. She hadn’t meant to make it sound as harsh as it did and sighing, she opened her own door, zipping up her sweatshirt as she did so. He’d turned the headlights off so the only light was from a parking lot fluorescents fifteen feet away. Coming around the front of the car, she tugged on his arm, “hey, look at me, please?”
“Have you given up already?”
With a genuine scoff in his direction, “I don’t give up on anything. What the hell kind of question is that?”
“You said when something happens to you.”
“No, I said if.” Taking him by the arms, she turned him around until his back was to the car, “will you sit down?”
“Why?”
“So I can look at you, and not up your nose, when I talk.”
He conceded, sitting down on the bumper, “nothing’s going to happen to you.”
“Yes, I know.” Coming in closer, she forced her way between his knees, “but I learned from you to plan for all eventualities. I have a prepacked suitcase for when you ring my doorbell at 5am telling me we leave in 20 minutes. I have $500 cash in my purse and another $500 in my carry-on for emergencies …”
“Bail money for me?”
“Some of it, yes.” Continuing, “I now prepare for all things, even if there isn’t a chance in hell they’re going to happen. You forced me to learn that and I have and that’s all my comment was. I will be fine,” moving her palms to his face, thinning fingers, delicate steel hands against his cheeks, covering his ears as she tilted his head up to look at her, “but I feel better knowing mom has you and you have mom. You became friends with her while I was missing. I haven’t been forcing you together to create some superficial bond to make my never going to happen, non-impending doom easier to accept. She invites you for pie. You arrive and eat pie. You go home with leftover pie. I have nothing to do with that but I’m glad it happens.”
By now, his hands were on her wrists, eyes glued to her, closing as she leaned in, mirroring that accursed hospital hallway not that long ago. Once her forehead touched his, she whispered, “you are not Max. You have so many people here who love you and need you and you have so much to offer them back and you do. That’s the difference between you and Max. He searched for himself. You search for me, Mulder. You search,” kissing his forehead, then quickly his mouth, “for me.”
Then she wrapped her arms around him and felt his go around her waist. Hugging him tightly, she let the world disappear, sinking against him, warm, solid, against her.
“Who knew this much angst could come from a misplaced modifier?”
“We know now. Never let it happen again.”
With a chuckle, he shifted his head, talking into her shoulder, “Modell? Really?”
She just hugged him tighter, staying quiet against him as he held her close.
&&&&&&&&&&
They may have stayed like that for two minutes. It may have been ten. Regardless, eventually, Scully had to whisper into Mulder’s neck, where her mouth had landed earlier when she turned her head, “Mulder?”
Just as quietly, “yeah?”
“Can you take me home to bed, please?”
“Should I comment on the structure of that sentence as well or just be quiet?”
Giving another kiss to his neck, she pushed back off of him, sly grin, “just take me home.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
&&&&&&&&
After a quiet goodnight/good morning at her bedroom door, he wandered to the living room, taking up residence on her couch, 3am sleepy as his head hit the spare pillow and his mind was finally calm.
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goodlucktkachuk · 4 years
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Frantic -- Matthew Tkachuk (Pt.2)
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a/n: And by popular demand we have part two. Hope you guys enjoy!
Part One
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Instantly a smile covered your face as you pressed confirm. Your instagram was nothing of scandal, mainly  paintings or doodles, a few pictures of you and Emily, and some vacation photos from last summer in Muskoka that you knew Matthew will enjoy. When Mitch reentered the room he shot you a puzzled look.
“What’s got you so chipper mini?” He teased, using the nickname your mom affectionately gave you when you were four and in a phase where you followed Mitch everywhere.
Chuckling, you shrugged your shoulders, “Emily sent me a really funny video of Nick in a facemask.” He laughed at the thought and the topic was dropped.
Around 1am, Mitch was blacked out on the couch next to you so you took the blanket you had wrapped around you and you tried to place it as softly as possible on your sleeping brother. After turning off the TV, you headed into their bathroom to borrow Steph’s makeup wipes. As you stared at yourself in the mirror for the first time that day and you could really see how tired you were. The all nighters of  homework and the rush and fall of going to games had started to catch up with you. You quickly slipped into Mitches closet and grabbed one of his old London hoodies and a pair of boxers. Once you found yourself in your pajamas and the warm embrace of the guest bed you flicked your eyes on your phone once again.
*Matthew_Tkachuk has sent you a message*
Intrigued by what the boy has to say you slid over the notification and unlocked your phone.
Matthew: first of all, what the fuck? Had I know it was you I wouldn’t have said what I said
Y/N: what?
Matthew: You didn’t think to mention that you're a mini marnie princess?
Y/N: why does it matter matty? Not like I live with him anymore. I’m an adult now Matty
Matthew: You’re still Mitches kid sister Y/N! I can’t just brush that off
Your chest ran tight after hearing him call you a kid. You knew you were younger but didn’t see the big deal about it.
Y/N: Oh give me a break, I’m 19, I’m all grown up now Tkachuk
Matthew: prove it, move this to snap and put your money where your mouth is ;)
Your heart fluttered in your chest but before you could enjoy it you found yourself mentally scorning yourself. This was your brother's old teammate and a family friend. Hell, you and Tayrn were attached at the hip everytime you two were together. There was too much history. Even though everything in your mind screamed no you found yourself accepting his proposal anyway before drifting off to sleep.
The next morning you woke up to find there was a sticky note placed firmly on your forehead. Pulling it off slowly, you flipped it over and it read ‘Went out for lunch with some of the team. Text me when you wake up’ The fact he couldn’t have just texted you that made you roll your eyes. You slowly lifted yourself out of the bed and started your staggered walk to the guest bathroom.
The sight in the mirror this morning was actually pretty cute. Your braids were slightly a mess from the night before but it went nicely with how Mitches sweater fit you and how his boxers hung off your hips. You snapped a picture of you throwing up a peace sign and posted it on your story with some witty caption about stealing Mitch’s clothes and looking better in them before hopping in the shower.
After departing from the warmth of the shower you changed back into your jeans from the night before and kept the sweater on. You ordered yourself some food and pulled out your laptop to get some school work done. Before you dove into art history and marketing techniques you opened a snapchat from Matt.
It wasn’t anything groundbreaking. He was sitting in a restaurant somewhere in a nice polo shirt. You could see half his face and his curls were pushed up with a red bandana. You stared at it for so long that you almost forgot to read what it said. ‘Snazzy hoodie you got there mini marnie, too bad it has the wrong name on the back’
You followed suit with your response, only sending half your face with a smirk plastered to your lips. ‘See Marner suits me so much better than Tkachuk so I think I’ll stick with this one!’
Matthew smiles at his phone. He was at a team lunch with the Flames and a few Leafs to catch up before they had to head back to Calgary. It was nice to see all the boys again, especially Mitch even though he had a different Marner on his mind. The lunch was overall pleasant even with all the dirty looks he had got from Auston any time anyone mentioned Y/N. As hard as it was for him not to spew endless chirps, he knew if he ever wanted a shot with you he knew he had to bite his tongue.
Deciding taking photos wasn’t the smartest way to hide what he was doing he texted you back instead. “Ouch Y/N that one hurt a bit. Hopefully in a few years you’ll change your mind ;)”
Y/N: In your dreams, Tkachuk. The team already has me destined to be with Aus so you gotta get in line.
Seeing those words made a fire erupt in his body. He knew you were probably just joking around but the idea of Auston getting to hold you made his blood run cold. Maybe that friendly warning wasn’t in the best interest of Y/N but Auston being selfish.
Matty: Auston has nothing on me sweetheart.
His words stopped you in your tracks. You never thought the juvenile feelings you had for Matthew would ever be reciprocated but here he was playing the game right back.
Y/N: I don’t know Matty, I’ve seen what Austons packing
As soon as Matthew read your text he slammed his phone down with a ‘Fuck’ that was a bit too loud making all the guys look at him.
“What’s your deal?”  Johnny asks, confused at his sudden outburst.
“Nothing.” Matthew says before he picks his phone backup and answers his text.
Matthew: I’m sorry what?
Before you answered, your mind drifted back to the previous summer. Mitch had invited the team and their girlfriends up to your cottage for one of the long weekends. It was a really fun weekend filled with drinking, boating, bonfires and even more drinking. On the last night there, Auston had a bit too much and proceeded to take off his swim trunks and run full force into the lake. Thinking it was hilarious, a few of the other boys followed suit. Unfortunately, because of where you were sitting when this happened, you saw a bit more of your brother's teammate than you would like to.
Snapping back to realted you messaged him back.
Y/N: you read what I sent
Matthew: tell me how good he was and then let me show you something better princess.
A mad blush crossed your face at the thought of Matthew showing you what he could do. You pushed those thoughts out of your head and began work on the lecture notes you were avoiding. Trying your best to push the thought of him having his way with you out of your head.
A few hours passed and the boys all crashed into Mitches apartment. Mo, Jake, and Zach set up shop on the bar stools across from you as Auston draped himself over your shoulders. Mitch leaned over the edge of the counter, all of them talking over each other. You missed having a house full of players all having fun. Matthew texted you again and you quickly turned your phone over before anyone could see it but you weren’t fast enough. Hearing your phone go off and seeing Auston look over your shoulder, Jake shot him a look to which Auston just shook his head and they both frowned knowing it was Tkachuk. Still typing away on your computer, Aus reached down putting his hands on yours and the pressure alone messed you up. As you went to scold him Jake interrupted you.
“So Y/N did you hear the Sandman and his girlfriend broke up?”
“I didn’t actually, I thought they were gonna get engaged?” Not looking up from your screen you tried speaking with as little interest as possible.
He shrugged his shoulders then continued “Guess it didn’t work out” He took a slight pause while Auston nodded at him  “Maybe you two should go out. Mitch mentioned at lunch you aren't seeing anyone.”
“I’m not sure dating another leaf is a good idea.” You responded still trying to feign interest.
“I think that would be a great idea.” Aus chimed in from behind you.
“I don’t remember asking what you thought, Auston.” You bite back.
You could cut the tension between you and Auston with a knife. After about a minute of no one saying anything, Mitch clapped loudly to catch the group's attention before he spoke.  
“Alright boys I think it's time for some Modern Warfare” The boys all nodded and headed towards the living room.
Auston leaned in close, whispering in your ear before going to meet the others, “It’s cause he’s young right? I know guys my age are more your speed these days.”
You flinched slightly, “I don’t know what you're talking about” You tried to say as smoothly as possible.
“If you say so, pest.” The last word basically being spat at you with a hostility you had never felt from him before. He finally let go of you and headed for the living room.
With that comment you had had enough and excused yourself to head back to your apartment. On your way down to the lobby knowing you were safe from the watchful eye of Auston and Jake you decided to answer Matthew.
Matthew: Y/N? Did I say something that's going to get me in trouble?
Y/N: Sorry, got distracted by some homework. Since when is Matty Tkachuk afraid of causing a little trouble ?
Part Three
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antlerqueer · 2 years
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mildly tmi personal post, if youre under 18 pls don’t read it’s not necessarily involving sex but it does talk about it so that makes me uncomfy.
so recently i’ve been on the fence about my sexuality bc i think i deal with comphet and i’m not bisexual bc the reason ive hooked up with men is bc i could and bc i like the power. yes i’m a little terrible, i was bullied growing up, it’s unhealthy.
anyway the last relationship i was in started in like 2011 and ended in 2015 and I haven’t dated since and haven’t bothered dating since because i have been trying to like... exist. post-college life is hard and 2015 onward was really difficult for me to adjust.
ive hooked up with people since but only dudes (and again only bc they were available lmao why am i like this) but since moving to nyc in 2019 i havent tried dating or put effort into it beyond using apps and talking to some nice sapphics online.
but last night....
a friend of a friend, let’s call him A, that i’ve met twice was at a gathering for my friend. we’ve talked before, we have a similar sense of humor, we’re both new englanders who have lived in boston so we’re mean to each other to show respect. me, A, and a different friend (we’ll call him B because we’re doing the alphabet) were at a bar waiting for the rest of the people to join the gathering and i thought he might have flirted with me at one point but brushed it off as being mean (affectionate).
when we move locations (our group decided to do karaoke) and while we’re walking there i threatened i would hurt him if he did something i didn’t like (a typical threat from me, a person who would never hurt anyone actually) and he said “i’d be into that” or something along those lines and i said “i meant emotionally” and he replied with “i’d be into that, too”. this was when i got mildly suspicious he may actually be flirting with me.
during karaoke, he sat between my friend (C, as it goes, was the organizer and she’s in town for a few days and we have A Bit that we’re dating [she has a real boyfriend, who A is “the boyfriend” of but in like a “work wife” way bc they share a hobby]) at one point and C & I looked at each other like “wtf why would A MAN get between us”. 
he had ordered chicken wings or something and i asked for one and he was like “I havent eaten dinner but here u can have a piece” and i was like “if you said no i was just gonna remind you of how you took chips of mine without asking last time we hung out :) so :)” and then he gave me a second piece and winked at me??? when he gave me the second piece???? which COULD have been Not Flirting imo but seemed like flirting?
keep in mind: i have no actual interest in this guy. but i like the idea of someone flirting with me. and i like that it means i have a leg up on him. i picked an arctic monkeys song and he was like “oh i should pick an arctic monkeys song” bc again we are new englanders who were college-aged in 2015 so of course we listened to arctic monkeys. wanna know what fucking song he picked? “i bet you look good on the dancefloor”, with lyrics such as “stop making the eyes at me, i’ll stop making the eyes at you” and “I wish you’d stop ignoring me because it’s sending me to despair” which felt mildly pointed but ALSO it’s one of their most popular songs so i could be overthinking this all. i had asked C earlier in the night “is A flirting with me or am i just arrogant?” and she was like “no i think he’s flirting with you” but i’m stilll not fucking sure bc i just assume no one would flirt with me on purpose.
at the end of the night, friend C gets into an uber to go, friends B & E live in the same area so they share an uber back, and then I told A since he was planning on walking he’d be a gentleman and walk me to the subway. (I live the furthest and it was 1am). so he walks with me to the train, and on the way i mention maybe wanting wendy’s but he says something about wanting savory food and we pass a halal cart so he gets food there, we talk boston restaurants briefly, and the train stop is in front of a cvs so i said “I want candy” so he came with me to CVS. Truth be told, I just wanted to know if he’d actually go into CVS with me if I said I wanted to go to CVS or if he’d just head home since he walked me to the train. 
he went into cvs with me, and also decided he’d take the train home, too. so we waited for like 10 min in the train station, i gave him a piece of chocolate as a thanks for walking with me, and then he got off at his stop while i was giving money to someone so we didnt really say bye i just threw a peace sign his way. now i’m feeling real chuffed bc i made this man walk 10 minutes in sleet with me to the train station and go to cvs with me and wait for 10 min in the subway station when he would have been home in 30 min instead of like an hour if he just went his merry way from the karaoke place. that means he’s my bitch now, in my mind. (when i told B about this he said “don’t you just treat every cishet like your bitch?” which was a fair assessment but also. str8 men don’t act like this if they don’t want to fuck me, if i recall correctly. it’s been a very long time so i don’t actually know if i’m recalling correctly.)
moral of the story: i am conflicted because part of me wants to because i can, but also that’s literally the only reason why i want to so i shouldn’t, right? right?
if u made it this far u can lmk what u think if you even think anything or are just like “wow this was a lot for megan to put online”
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omg so I read this manga this morning called Sesame Salt and Pudding and it’s ab this 22 y/o girl who gets drunk and accidentally marries a stranger, who happens to be 42. it’s the cutest lil slice of life just a really healthy relationship and all i could think was this would be the funniest meet cute for Erwin.
Thanks for linking me the manga website anon omfg you're a real one💙🐛
Alright so below is my 1am thoughts while reading it as i listen to a daddy/mommy issues playlist i found online and drinking green apples monster energy.
Tw: mentions of sex | Tw: suggestive words
Chapter one
The girl is really pretty, I'm really gay.
Wait so she married him while drunk and now can't remember anything?
This lowkey does look like Erwin without gel in his hair
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...why can i see Erwin as the type of drunk to not only sign a wedding registration paper but also demand both of you must go get wedding ware, paying for your dress or suit.
Consent 👏yes👏100%👏the bare minimum👏Erwin values consent above literally anything else👏Erwin wouldn't touch you without permission even while drunk out of his mind👏again it's the bare minimum👏
An older dude that cooks & cleans while staying home as i go out and provide for us? This is my dream. Stay at home husband Reiner stay at home husband Reiner stay at ho
Ngl i think Erwin wouldn't know anything past basic cooking despite him reading all these cooking books and watching videos, i think if he really was dedicated he'd sign up for a cooking class go get high level skills just to impress you but treat it like it's nothing
...he didn't wanna stare at her chest so he went to clean the fridge- Erwin would def be that kind of gentleman to change his own attitude instead of ever telling you to change or cover up.
I love her job oh my god yes.
Ooo a love rival huh👀 is this gonna turn into a triangle situation
The only love rival I'd ever see for Erwin is Nile tbh, like i think if it was Miche, Hange or Levi then he'll talk it out and either him or the person backs off.
He gets gloomy when jealous huh~
THIS IS FUNNIER THAN IT HAS ANY RIGHT TO BE DOAKDJKAKSN I CAN'T.
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I can't even imagine Erwin's reaction if you said this to him, like he won't even be mad he would just be really taken back, standing there like 🧍🏼‍♂️...he'd even be amused.
Okay- okay this is a good reaction...I think Erwin would say something similar but rephrase it to he more subtle yet somehow making it sound dirtier.
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Something along the lines of, "well, if you're so sure then why don't you find out yourself."
And "after all i can't deny that i haven't thought about how beautiful looked last night...how the more beautiful you would've looked laying down."
"You looked like a really delicious treat"
"All pretty and alone, tearing about your worries, i just wanted to make you forget them all and leave the rest to me"
I should stop-
Chapter two
HE SAID HE IS HER UNCLE I CAN'T BREATHE I LOVE THIS
Oh shit he overhead them oh shit
Shit is going down oh god
Man if it was Nile in this hypothetical insert then he'd be hold this information like the petty bitch he is and use it at the date instead.
Chapter three
Ngl dude, i really hate it when they treat it like a women's reputation is all she has. I especially hate the purity culture of that a young women can't be a roommate with a man because "what will people say" like...if they're fucking who cares and if they aren't literally who cares? Do they realise gay people exist too and two women have an equal chance of sleeping together too?
It feels like they treat women as children, maybe I'm just projecting bc i live in a similar kind of culture where all these rules apply here if not more.
Anyway that manga is cute, it just angred me that these two men think they're responsible for solving her problem or as if they have any right to scold her or be angry like she's some kind of child and should listen.
It's her life, it's her problem and it's her who will solve it.
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DUDE SHUT THE FUCK UP. he's really acting like a bitch as if he has any right to be angry or even judge her oh my god.
"Impure background..." Get fucked.
The only ONLY reason he even can be angry is because she didn't mention being married while they were going for a date but they didn't even go on that date and nothing was official so why does she have to tell him her private life.
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RED FLAG RED FLAG RED FLAG HUGE RED FLAG
"get divorced immediately" HUGE FUCKING RED FLAG
Controlling Insecure cunt.
I'm sorry anon that I'm really going off on him and I'm sorry if you like him- it's just that i really really can't stand these things
THE MANGA IS LOVELY THO THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR RECOMMENDING IT I'D LOVE MORE WHENEVER💜
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Oh baby, oh angel I'm so sorry you had to go through that, in no way is it ever right to get angry and yell no matter what especially since you apologised and admitted to your mistake.
Especially since he knew it was something you did while drunk and deeply regret it but he still took out his angry on you like you betrayed his trust when you weren't even together or like you intentionally did it.
Narcissistic dick.
I'm not talking about the next scenes because it might be triggering.
Chapter five
4 is missing :( idk how her parents visit went
We just started the chapter and-
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Fuck her. Like what's up with toxic abusive people being too comfortable saying these things lmao like they actually take themselves seriously omfg.
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Imagine saying this about Erwin tho, like it feels powerful to say. John maloney was right after all huh
Oh
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Oh
So we doing this huh
👀
....oh :( we were just getting to the god part, man Erwin wouldn't have let a phone stop him.
Also bless the translator for their note at the end, it's good we're seperating fiction from reality and clarifying things to people on how to act in these scenarios.
Like drama is fun and all, I'm a huge sucker being extra, but things are different in real life and using fiction as a guide to how to deal with these, clearly written to be extra, situations should never ever be anyone's first choice.
Well that's all the 10 images tumblr will allow me in one post, i hope you had fun anon because i sure did! And i can definitely see this as a sweet wholesome Erwin/reader story, and if i ever did a an inspired rewriting of that manga with Erwin i can definitely see it being really fun to write!
Although i will change some stuff like that guy, i know people have good and bad sides but the guy specifically made me uncomfortable for personal reasons, i also Don't like mentioning serious things like anger controlling issues without diving deep into them.
Imma go finish the manga, if you want a part two, or have a different thing to recommend, please let me know💙
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