#i was kind of going through it lately

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Master manipulator vs Master manipulator

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#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #xue yang #a-qing #The scenes with XY and A-Qing are so delightfully tense and anxiety inducing #They are both so deep in the mind games with each other. Convinced they have the leg up when in reality they do not know the full scope #Also is is just me or do XY and A-Qing give off the vibe of internet nemeses? #A-Qing coming in hard with 'Oh you think blind people cant do XYZ? Get canceled idiot' #Meanwhile XY is the kind to purposefully use leet speak in descriptive text to antagonize the screen reader population. #a teen girl and a 4-channer who found his way to tumblr would be awful to watch fight irl but the vibes are equivalent. #Meanwhile XXC is going on a nice little walk to pick grass. I love him so much actually. #through writing these notes I have also gone down the rabbit hole of trying to pinpoint Xue Yang's age. Hello? Is it actually not known? #The best resources I could find put him as 1-3 years younger then xxc and song lan #So? early twenties? late teens? Someone who has absorbed more mdzs knowledge...Please help #Oh no I'm even deeper in the rabbit hole now. What do you mean the ages are mostly just relative? #What do you mean cultivators can age differently (usually slower in xianxia) #Oh no oh no wwx doesn't have a golden core. I was too accurate in my homestuck AU re: lifespans. I want to go back. #(I love angst and am now marinating this thought in my little thinking chamber)

[bg3-dyes]

i have finished all the body type 1 dyes... for now 😳 (edit: not anymore since patch 5 but STILL A LOT) everything is in the archive drive. special thanks to @salfur for handling the body type 2 outfits!

i added a spreadsheet (+ a pdf version) to the drive so you can check for specific items that may be missing - there are a BUNCH of items that have the same model, and are functionally identical once dyes are applied. so, for example, if you're looking for dye variations for the Anarchic White Outfit:

you can reference the Anarchic Blue Outfit dye sheet! ✨

also!

now that im finally done with the heavy lifting for this project..... the time has come for me to actually play the game. 🫣 im going to be streaming occasionally over on twitch, so feel free to follow me there if that's something you're interested in 💕 no concrete schedule yet, ill probably post updates on here to keep u in the loop on that (but i still gotta keep this blog tidy to keep it functional as an archive)

but anyway, for now.... i will take a nap 🫡

edit: adding my ko-fi since some people have been asking me about it - thank you for the interest & generosity! 💗

#not dyes #and again thank u all so much for the constant outpour of love & support & positivity ❤️ #like idk ive been going through some shit lately but every time i open my inbox to more kind messages it just absolutely makes my day #this project has kept me afloat in a way and it's mostly thanks to you all. so thank u fr fr <3

[zaacoy]

The sillys!! Back at it again!!!

#When you casually trip and fall into the arms of your beloved in the most gay way possible #Would they canonically be this sappy over one of them literally just tripping? no #will that stop me? also no :3c #Because I am evil and devious and will minorly mischaracterize my favorite characters whenever I want mwahahaha #Pacing is kind of bad but it is a-okay because theym #I am so normal about them in particular heeheehoo #freenoodleshipping #lmk freenoodles #lego monkey kid fanart #lego monkie kid #monkie kid #Lmk #lmk pigsy #lmk tang #Many more freenoodles ideas but I don't have the time to execute them yet sigh #Still have 5 more exams and 2 big experiment things I need to get through + some projects I think #+ normal school work and then I'll be freeeee #Late may through June is going to be so so fun I can't wait to flood the masses with freenoodles #Zaacoy art💫

[gale-in-space]

I do not believe this darkness will endure, btw. If you even care.

#:) #faramir #i’m feeling small sunbeams of hope lately #i hope i can spread that hope to as many people as i can #i’m going through a lot but so many ppl have been so kind to me and i want to pay it forward #anyway. whatever. love and light

[defiledtomb]

WE LIVE. WE DIE. WE LIVE AGAIN

#ouroboros-if #interactive fiction #dev log #thought i'd share my diary for those that struggle too. Go easy on yourself #on writing #I've been on fire lately and it's like a soothing balm (even though I honestly have to scrap most of my writing #from when I pushed myself through the burnout #had i just accepted that I needed rest and stopped right then this whole ordeal would've passed so much faster #instead I needed to go on a whole ass self-healing journey #BUT I CRESTED THAT DAMN HILL AND IM PLANTING A FLAG #I DID IT!!!! I SURVIVED AND CAME OUT THE OTHER END!!!!! #writing struggles #writing positivity #and genuinely: thank you for your support and kind words as I struggled(though I was tightlipped about it) it kept me afloat.

[lmelodie]

Have you ever seen all of our OC's in one room? Well now you have! I was thinking about a potential collab and then inspiration took over for once in a lifetime lol. I think this has two black cats and two golden retriever energy? Maybe? idk but I hope I clocked everyone's vibes correctly.

Elle belongs to @shittyelfwriter, Mel belongs to @kscribbs, and Jacqueline belongs to @safyresky. Rants under the cut!

I don't know how much of a friend group this really is, depending on how friendly Kills is that day, but it was super fun to roll around the group dynamic in my head.

I truly have no idea how functional this group actually is together, y'all are gonna have to collaborate your thoughts here, but as OVERPOWERED as they all are, the braincell situation is yet to be determined.

Also, this is the second time I've drawn Killian driving a car, which is kinda funny to me since he canonically cannot drive. Straight up doesn't know how, and yet he has been in charge of the motor vehicle twice now lol.

The group therapy idea SENT ME because EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE BITCHES has the most horrible trauma and ya put 'em in a room together and it sets EVERYONE back. They come out WORSE than when they went in.

In the very first image, Mel does have a book in her hand, but Elle is blocking the whole thing 😔. It was gonna be the How to be a "Bad Bitch" three volume collective set.

#digital art #artists on tumblr #the santa clause #oc #millers law #elleconnelly #crystal springs au #we are just over here putting boots on ANYONE huh #the acting casual one where elle has her leg UP THERE is one of my favs #it was very fun to go through and find images that had their energy #whatever kind of energy that is! #also sorry for the late post #i HAD to get this out here asap!

[cerealforkart]

I reread some of the old manga pages for the first time in a while tonight and you know what? I’m actually really happy with them! Sure the old art is old and gross, but overall, I’ve done a good job!

#noodly #I was going through all my old art actually #which is like 50% manga pages #and I’m really happy with them actually #I might go reblog some of my favourite old stuff actually #because I have some cute drawings back there! #I feel like I’ve been kind of down on the manga lately #just because of burnout garbage #but I’m genuinely really happy with this project and this is a great time for a last wind

[hockeynoses]

Hot Tub Snzs (R/oy x Ja/mie)

Summary: Jamie suggests Roy get into the hot tub to clear his sinuses. Roy's hands are wet and Jamie ends up holding the tissues for him.

Notes: <900 words. Some mess. Not really any other warnings. Pure fluff. This came to me in a half-dream yesterday morning when I was trying to fall back asleep, and I had to write it. I'm not usually a Roy girlie, so I surprised myself.

-

Roy and Jamie drive up to their vacation home for a long weekend. They bought it a while back when they realized this thing between them was real, and they were both in it for the long haul. The property has a couple acres of land, and it’s surrounded by trees; one of the few places where they don’t have to worry about being hounded by paparazzi.

The house has an upscale cottage vibe, with a large hot tub on the back deck. It’s a crisp autumn afternoon, and the forest around them is lit up with vibrant yellows, oranges, and reds.

Roy’s on the tail-end of a cold that's been annoying him for the past week and a half. At this point, he’s feeling better, but his body is still trying to eject all of the gunk that has built up in his head. He’s so fucking congested and wishes he could speed up the process.

Jamie, who has grown tired of his constant complaining, suggests he go in the hot tub because, “Maybe the steam will help.”

Roy almost puts up a fight just for the hell of it, but they’re on vacation, and Jamie has his best interests at heart. Roy does love a good soak.

“Go on,” Jamie says. “I’ll join you in a bit.”

Roy grumbles, but does as he’s told. The heat feels amazing on his muscles, and the view can’t be beat. He relaxes into the water, steam coiling up into the air, bringing with it the burning smell of chlorine. The effect is two-fold: the steam loosens his congestion as the stinging itch of the chlorine sets off pinpricks of sensation in his inflamed sinuses. “Hah…HA’AAIISSHHH! Hih’EEHHHSSHH’IUE!” He doesn’t bother to cover them, openly sneezing down onto the surface of the water.

Catching his breath only works the steam deeper into his airways, and he gears up for another clearing, “huh’GGKSSHH’AH!” He tries to snort up the mess that has run out onto his cupid’s bow, and has no choice but to swipe at it with his wet hand before returning it to the water. The powerful sneezes have worked to clear some of his congestion, but he needs to blow his nose to really finish the job.

“Christ, I can hear your Grandad sneezes from inside the house,” Jamie says as he opens the back door. He’s in his speedo with a box of tissues under his arm.

Roy gives a pointed, productive sniff. “Should be used to it by now.”

“Just sayin’. You’re gonna scare the wildlife, goin’ on like that.”

Roy just grunts in response, lifting his wet hand to rub at the tip of his itchy nose.

Jamie steps into the hot tub, making sure to keep his hands dry. He sets the tissue box on the ledge next to them.

Roy’s eyes flutter shut and he turns to the side, half-heartedly holding up a hand to his face that does absolutely nothing to cover the wrenching sneeze that bursts from him. “haa…HA’AAEISHH’OO! Ugh.” When he turns back to Jamie, there are twin streams of clear mess coating his upper lip.

“Disgustin’!” Jamie teases. Roy knows he’s only joking. Having grown up as professional footballers, they’ve both seen men do far more disgusting things on the regular to be offended by a little snot.

“Give me a fuckin’ tissue then!” Roy gripes.

“Nah, your hands are all wet, mate. Come here, I’ll do it.”

Roy looks at him hesitantly as Jamie readies a couple tissues.

“Really?”

“Yeah, come on then.” Jamies gestures him forward. Roy rolls his eyes and leans closer.

His nose, chilly from the crisp fall air, is enveloped in the soft heat of Jamie’s cotton-covered hand. He starts blowing, only slightly embarrassed to hear the heavy crackle of it as it fills the tissue. It must be soaking through to Jamie’s skin, but the other man says nothing about it.

“Better?” Jamie asks. Roy pulls back and gives a tentative sniff, relieved that he’s finally able to get some air through.

“Yeah, actually.”

“Good!” Jamie graces him with a beaming smile. Roy resolves to do something special for him after he’s put up with his grouchy ass this whole week.

Even after all that, the pesky itch deep in his nose refuses to leave him. Roy blinks and scrunches his nose up, rubbing it in circles against the back of his wet hand. Jamie watches him and grabs some fresh tissues.

“You done?” Jamie asks, amusement twinkling in his eye.

“N-no…” Roy’s nostrils flare as he sucks in a quick breath, his head rearing back. His eyes close and he snaps forward “iihh…HNG’KSSHHHuh!” – into a waiting bundle of soft kleenex.

Blinking his eyes open, he meets Jamie’s surprised gaze. Jamie nods at him and Roy buries his face deeper into his hand, releasing a long, thick blow until the soggy tissues can’t hold any more.

He pulls back with a groan as Jamie gets after any residual mess still clinging to him.

“Thanks,” Roy says, relaxing back against the tub. “I think that was all of them.”

“Got you covered, Coach,” Jamie says with a wink. He brushes a kiss against Roy’s cheek before settling in next to him, happy to while away the rest of the evening by his side.

#snzblr #snz fic #snzfic #snz fics #snzfics #I've been on a goddamn roll lately #not saying these are super high quality but having a lot of practice can't hurt right? #me living out my re@l estate fantasies through these two rich fuckers #this was originally going to be in the format of a short prompt kind of thing but then I wrote one line of dialog & it spun out from there #jam/ie ta/rtt #hn tissue tag

[thedreadvampy]

The thing is I am definitely not happy or chill in the Immediate Sense lately but I am, big picture, so fucking happy with the person I am.

It's like. My brain was made by and for consistent trauma and since that trauma stopped about 5-7 years ago, it is incredible what the amount of resilience and cleverness and flexibility and thoughtfulness I developed to survive can do when it's not being all spent on surviving. like I had a hundred ton weight on me so I had to get REALLY STRONG to stay in the same place and not get 100% crushed, and when that weight came off I found I can use the strength it used to take to stand up and I can leap tall buildings in a single bound.

I was talking to my mum the other day and she said, "you've got the 'fuck it' energy at 30 that most women don't find until their fifties at least" and I'm like yeah man. Imagine how unstoppable I'll be in 20 years.

#red said #i don't know that i can express this clearly but it's the most encouraging thing in my life #my mum's always been proud of me but just lately she seems to actually really admire me #like she's genuinely impressed. she thinks I've surpassed her. i don't necessarily agree but it's a really nice quiet joy. #anyway like this sounds super up myself and it kind of is. #but also it's part of realising just how heavy the weight I've been carrying around with me for 25 years was #like not to be ridiculous but i have realised again this week. that it isn't that everyone's been raped that much and doesn't talk about it #i just have been raped an Unusually Consistent Amount. i have spoken to a lot of people who have had much more horrifying things happen. #I'm not sure I've talked to more than a couple of people who've had a similar level of total consistency of abuse from all angles #and the one is not heavier or harder to bear that the other. but. i think i spent most of my life listening to people's awful experiences #and going ok well nothing i went through looked that bad so it's microtrauma #obviously microtraumas build up but still. #then the older i get and the more i have these conversations the more I notice that stuff which to me is a microtrauma #is a lot of people's defining trauma. and they're reacting appropriately which means i am SO SEVERELY UNDERREACTING #told my friend the other day about a time someone who i still like and respect was having sex with me when i paralocated my hip #and then just kept getting really annoyed with me for not being ready to have sex again while i was literally crying with pain #until i caved and just tried to find the last painful position #and my friend was like pal what the fuck that's horrific #and i was like i mean no that's normal I've had sex with like maybe 3 or 4 people in my life who i haven't had similar stuff with #like i am genuinely thrown when i am allowed to say no to sex and have it be the end of the conversation. and not end up having sex #out of guilt or out of physical coercion or through physical rape. and i have had sex with probably like 40 people at this stage? #and I'm not sure it's as many as 4 i haven't had that experience with tbh #so like. I'm slowly coming to terms with the idea #that i may have actually been doing a hell of a lot of heavy lifting. #like i developed a sense of self that can survive being constantly crushed and at this stage is fucking diamond.

[skeletalheartattack]

Im soooooo hungry i neeed.... gaming trivia. tO live 😺

i mostly just have TF2 trivia, as its history has always been something ive always been fascinated with, so i hope these suffice:

The Pyro's Beta Head: While 8 of the 9 classes had their heads redone throughout development (to better show off Valve's new facial flex system), only the Pyro was left untouched, leaving them as the only class to still have their beta head.

Reference Posing Medics: In "Trailer 2", there are two Medics who are in their reference pose, during the first-person sequence of the Scout running through RED's base. While their role isn't clear, one likely theory is that they were meant to be camera positions for shots that were ultimately removed, in favour of the Scouts perspective, and Valve just forgot to remove or hide them. The second Medic even turns to look at the Scout as he runs by, maybe further proving their original purpose.

The Teaser Corkboard: While we don't have a clear idea as to what Valve had been planning with the "Teaser Corkboard", one likely theory is that it was created for the proposed update that would've included both Asteroid and Cactus Canyon, due to the few mentions of "Future", the blueprint of the rocket engine from Half Life 2 Episode 2, and Poopy Joe. Also worth noting, the two posters that were added with the corkboard share similar styles Asteroid and Cactus Canyon.

The Balls of Steel Taunt: Originally, The Love & War update was meant to include a lot more taunts than what ultimately shipped. One of the few to get scrapped is a taunt called "Balls of Steel", where the initiator would dare other players to kick them in the groin. While we don't have footage of this taunt, we do have voiceline files that reference the taunt's intention, as well as the name. The few files that remain were reused for other contexts, such as the Soldiers Conga taunt, where his "Ooh!" and "Ahh!" lines were originally his pain sounds for the taunt.

#ask #anon #im a little late to respond to this. so i hope you didnt starve anon #if you did. whoopsies. uh oh. oh well anyway #i didnt want this to be too long so i left it to just 4 trivia pieces #was gonna answer this earlier but my phone died of low battery. so instead i took the time to get images for all the bulletpoints #i'm still kinda sad thinking about Asteroid and Cactus Canyon #also ik the blue poster isnt as clear to Asteroid. but to me it lines up more with the maps original idea of being a moonbase #and said poster has the moon.... i know. grasping for straws. #also for those interested. the corkboard deciphers to ''be sure to drink your jarute/jarbate'' #its unclear if the mispelling is intentional or accidental. given how the spellbook pages translate weirdly #theres also the red herring on the corkboard itself. maybe as a way for valve to have a way out if development doesnt go as planned #thats just my interpretation of it atleast. the corkboard was added in december of 2013 iirc. #while Asteroid was teased in April. and later released as a beta map a few months later with Cactus Canyon #anyway thats all my brain could muster for trivia #i havent thought about this kind of stuff in a long time. so searching through the file cabinet in my brain is a little tough #i hope these were interesting. or were new information to people #thank you for your ask anon!

[fluffs-n-stuffs]

Pokémon said bisexual rights 🫵✨✨✨

#fluff binges !!! #treating myself to more Horizons eps since I had a pretty awful past week mentally and need a pick-me-up #I keep smiling so wide while watching this series it's just so lighthearted and sweet #and can get unexpectedly resonant at times (I'd honest to god tear up from Liko's moments early on because right now identity's something-- #--I'm deeply struggling with - so seeing her always want to try and find out more about the kind of trainer she wants to be hits close) #this series is comforting to me and I get to enjoy it at my own time and pace 💖💕✨ #(that may seem like a superficial thing but I've been through a lot lately aight I'm taking the little joys I can) #(and frankly I've been............... hiding out from other places because I just. need time away from things) #(so let me be silly on my lil blog here this is like a safe space heehaw 💃💃💃) #but anyways Horizons is for the queers amen #I'm not going insane right like . y'all see the queer-coding in other episodes tooSDKJFSJNDFNS #I also say bisexual Orio because of her talking about Friede earlier on there were sparks aiiiight they're cute #pokemon horizons #anipoke #pokeani #orio pokemon

[brain-rot-central]

Trying so hard to get back into reading everyone's WIP's again and not automatically compare them to my own writing so I don't inadvertently discourage myself from continuing.

It's hard lmao

#neech's speeches #that anon i got a month ago telling me i can't write dialogue did a number on me tbh #i was already feeling a certain kind of way and it was just the match that burned the whole house down #because to me #one negative voice is louder than 15 other positive ones #and i know that's my own personal bullshit problem #but still #I'm trying #I've been at least trying to write again lately #I've also just been going through it personally for the last like 2 months #so that didn't help #but whatever #I'm still here

[fecto-forgo]

yk while i actually like seward i dont think i like the "the ableism he does is trivial and removable because hes nice otherwise" take.at all lol.the fact he traumatized and mistreated renfield and holds aged beliefs is like.a huge part for both of their characters, i dont think you can just remove that like its no biggie and just some trivial author ableism that doesnt fit the character

#idk i actually think hes better as a character when theres a degree of questionable morals #and while i hate him during late september-early october him going through some kind of reverse character development where #he gets worse has some potential to be interesting #idk i just dont think making him just good always is fair to the characters or the plot #analiceoriginal.txt #also uh 'but hes nice to the people who arent part the group hes actually hurting' is...a take wow

[devilsskettle]

i feel like i’ve been WAITING for the other shoe to drop wrt people’s opinions about watcher for this very reason. not that i think the reaction is completely not understandable but the greater the parasocial relationship, the greater the fallout as soon as public opinion shifts. you don’t have a relationship with these people they’re just content creators, chill

#ready to see all the people coming out of the woodwork to say how they’ve never liked watcher/unsolved/etc #and act like it’s ‘cringe’ now that their fanbase feels ‘betrayed’ #it’s great to have a fanbase but parasocial relationships will bite you in the ass every single time #it’s interesting too though because i’ve seen watcher have a LOT of support as they’ve tried to build something separate from buzzfeed #so this is the first time they’re getting real pushback about a decision they’ve made wrt shifting their platform/expanding their brand #so ig we’ll have to see how they react moving forward #but it’s soooo interesting to see how enthusiastically people dump on buzzfeed #AND how many people dump on youtube and how over the years so much of its functionality has been stripped away #how many ads you have to sit through. how much sponsored content there is now. etc #but when they try to do the same thing with youtube that they did with buzzfeed it’s like how dare you not lick their boots #because if you lick their boots and we lick their boots we can watch stuff for free #anyway. #even if you don’t any to say it’s a bad business decision. it’s not like there’s not precedent for it #1) the move away from buzzfeed was successful and 2) what about the dnd shows or whatever #don’t you guys watch those dnd shows that are ‘behind a paywall’ #don’t you guys have netflix hulu disney hbo amazon etc ad nauseum that are actually owned by billion dollar corporations #don’t you guys get on your high horses about supporting independent artists all the time #it’s interesting that people will profess to be such big fans!!! and feel like they’re friends!!!! #but how dare they think their work might be worth paying for #idk. idk. it’s entitlement though #sorry for the rant i’m ALSO not trying to blindly defend a bunch of people i don’t know #but you guys are being soooo fucking annoying about it lol #anyway i’m still waiting to see what their response is going to be from here before jumping to conclusions #also to be fair i am biased to be lenient about decisions made by independent filmmakers vs big studios etc #like everybody freaking out about the ai art used in late night with the devil. who cares honestly #‘they should’ve paid a real artist!!’ idk maybe their budget didn’t cover that #i don’t want it to become the industry norm but at the end of the day i would rather see indie shit getting made then only seeing #the big studios (who don’t have equitable practices anyway!!) making shit #but that’s another conversation. just to be transparent about my viewpoint on this kind of thing #maybe controversial but also can’t we have nuance. for once.

[threadbaresweater]

I think I accidentally became a Nanami Kento blog

#not that i don't consider him a top contender #but on the rotation of blorbos he's kind of the odd man out as far as looks go #i have just felt the need to staunchly defend his honor lately #and as i scroll back through the last few days i see that I've had laser focus on him #nanami if you're free tonight #so am i #wanna help me meal plan for the week?

[crowcryptds]

[tucks hair behind ear] so i may have finished fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood

#roy mustang #riza hawkeye #ling yao #mei chang #fma greed #fullmetal alchemist brotherhood #fullmetal alchemist #black hayate #oops almost forgot i doodled the little guy there #fma #fmab #YEAH so like everyone else who was 10 years late to watching this show... hiiii i'm kind of OBSESSED so #it's a good year for my new years resolution to be drawing at minimum once a week #i know fmab is going to consume a lot of that time #my friend and i may do fma 03 and im seriously considering reading through the manga #brain really is itching at every opportunity to Know More of these guys... #i just drew my favorite characters from my first watch! im currently rewatching it its really good #i also wanted to draw scar but i need to practice him *ROLLS SLEEVES* #i really like how tired greed just looks like honestly what a guy #2023 #doodles #artists on tumblr