#insurance companies are the actual devil

[mbrainspaz]

remembering why I stopped going to the doctor years ago. So far it's gone like this: I went to a doctor someone recommended, they gave me the inhaler I needed at least (wish I could've just gone and bought myself the meds I knew I needed but nooooo), diagnosed another issue I needed help with, and referred me. The next doctor cost more money to tell me that the first doctor was right, but that I needed to see another doctor to confirm. That doctor said actually the last two doctors were wrong, but didn't have a clue what was actually going on. "Like idk maybe try CAT scans or something? Doctor no. 2 will call you back to follow up." Dr 2 has not called. Oh, and let's not forget the third doctor did a bunch of tests that hurt like hell and they had the nerve to interrogate me about 'why I was so down.' I hate it when doctors ask me that. I DUNNO BUB maybe I hate wasting all my time and money being processed like a slab of meat by scammy medical institutions that never actually help me?! Also I filled in your stupid form and admitted I had depression—what did you expect? They don't even read those damn things I swear. So now I've spent over $200 and wasted a total of about 10 hours running around town just to be exactly where I was before I talked to a doctor. It's so goddamn useless. Last time I spent $600 to get told I had bad knees and needed a surgery I couldn't afford. I already knew that! Now I've got another appointment this morning and I called the office (wasted 10 minutes just getting past the answering robot) to ask about the fasting the doctor told me to do for bloodwork—only to be told this wasn't an appointment for that. no no, this is just a 'follow up'. WHY?! So she can double check that I didn't die of an asthma attack in the meantime? I swear if I drive through houston traffic for 2 hours and pay another $25 just for this person to ask me how I've been breathing lately I'm done. I'm done. I'm dropping the whole thing. I'm just gonna accept that it's my lot in life to live like a 14th century peasant and hope I die of natural causes. I'll find some leeches in the creek and take some weird herbs and hope for the best. I don't even know what's going on with the insurance company because they emailed me asking me to pay another $25 copay for an appointment I already paid $50 for in person, so now I've gotta waste time and precious energy calling them to make sure there wasn't a stupid mistake, and if they say there wasn't then I just have to accept the extortion. And I've gotta keep signing all the stupid forms every time saying I'll pay I'll pay I'll pay. For WHAT? If I can never get actual medical care that fixes or alleviates the problems I'm dealing with what the hell am I paying for?! If I went to any other business and paid for a service and they failed to provide it I could demand to have my money back! But these hacks get to be like "well if you don't want to sign over your entire bank account enjoy your free human right to suffer and die lol." My elbow hurts like hell from writing this and half my hand is numb but the gods only know why. Anyway, here I go, off to spend another 2 hours and at least $25 but probably more than that on some more bullshit.

#us healthcare is a joke #fml #unhinged rant #I know I'm being unreasonable but I don't care #I hate it here #diagnosis fail #insurance companies are the actual devil #death ment tw #depression tw

[queerscout]

I am finding myself looking up parenting advice more often than I care to admit. I think it's time to go back to therapy.

#problem is my current insurance company is flat out closing this year #but because im a teacher our plans start in October instead of January #so ill have new insurance in 4 months #and my employer has no idea who we're switching to #and i reaaaaly dont want to go through finding a therapist #to find out in two months that theyre no longer covered #but trying to parent a traumatized kid with no concept of what normal family relationships look like is hard #hes also 10 hours away but talks about moving back to this area at least twice a week #and if he does that ill REALLY need therapy #because while I really care about this kid i dont know what im doing #and while 'better than his actual parents' is still something that bar is so low I'd have to limbo with the devil to be below it #personal #this post brought to you by the silent treatment hes giving me because i told him that he cant keep treating very serious things as jokes #and intentionally antagonizing me with things he knows would bother me

[cosmicstarlatte]

Customer Service (Obey Me!)

━━━━━━━━━━ ✦ ━━━━━━━━━━

They try contacting customer service. 🤷‍♂️

»Characters: Demon Bros

»Tags: Certified Shitpost™️, Pathetic Lucifer is my favorite Lucifer

»Notes: It's been a while since I've done a shitpost bulleted fic so ♡reblogs♡ are appreciated. I've had this wip since March apparently? 💀

Lucifer:

A hand on his hip and the phone in the other

This man means business

"Don't talk to me, I'm trying to keep my level of anger"

Held onto his anger for two hours waiting for the next agent

The annoying hold music only fueled him

Tried to be reasonable with the agent when he got patched through

But they were new

"Look, just get me your manager."

Waited another half hour for them

The problem got fixed rather quickly actually

smirked in satisfaction...Lucifer always wins.

If only he noticed the two stuck pages in the manual, he would've not wasted his morning

Mammon:

If he wasn't broke he would've paid someone else to make the call

Waited for an hour but it felt like eternity

"Yeah ain't there a satisfaction guarantee on this anyway!? The customers always right!"

Tried to get a replacement for his earbuds

And a refund while he was at it

Scammy? What?? Nooo....

"They fell in the wash! It's not my fault! Did I get insurance? Who has the money for that?"

Him and the agent went back and forth for a while

The agent finally caved and promised to replace the earbuds

"Finally! Ya better send 'em quick! -click-"

...

He realized he never gave the agent his address & had to start the process all over again

Levi:

Lol

Tried online chat but his specific issue needed a real agent because...of course it would

Tried to pay one of his brothers to make the call for him

They rather stab themselves or wage war against Diavolo than call customer service

Took anxiety medication before trying to call

Waited three hours on hold but played something soothing in the meantime

helloooo ruri and friends crossing

He stopped when he heard the hold music stop

"Hello thank you for calling Akuz-"

click

"It's not that important."

Satan:

This is how a pro does it.jpg

Drank his little coffee and ate his fresh little pastry

See, he set an alarm to call customer service right when they open their lines

Had the number typed and ready to go with a press

BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP

Finally!

-dialing tone-

"Hello. Your wait time is 2 hours and-"

...

...

...

Slammed his phone on the floor and it broke

Went to go fight the company in person

His issue got fixed

The company had to tighten their security after this incident

Asmo:

Is that one lucky demon that happens to get patched through quickly

He was having problems with his devilgram account verification

Just as he started speaking about his issue the agent freaked out

Turns out they were a huge fan and could automatically tell it was the REAL™️ Asmo speaking

The issue got fixed and Asmo stayed talking with the agent because they sounded really cute

One thing led to another and...it went from a customer service hotline to a phone sex one real quick

This always happens when he calls customer service akskjfksls

Beel:

Collected all the snacks he had

Even cooked an entire feast

He needed everything he could get before making the dreaded call

After an hour of waiting (and barely any snacks left) he finally got to an agent!

It was a pleasant experience for both sides

Beel is getting sent replacements for his shoes plus a discount voucher for his next purchase

güd boi™️ as usual

Belphie:

Almost fell asleep while waiting

The music soothed him, they had classical music playing

He's not really sure how long he waited if he's being honest

When he finally got to the agent he sounded so weak the agent was concerned

"Mm? No I'm always like ...losing... consciousness ...it's normal...zzz..."

The agent was still so concerned they sent someone to the HOL to check on him

Beel ended up making the call for him

⬦You might also like: Coconut︱Devil-Mart⭐︱Waffle House

#HIS OWN DADDY put me on this earth to bless everyone with pathetic lucifer AMEN #shitpostcifer #obey me #obey me headcanons #obey me shitpost #obey me crack #obey me humor #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me imagines #obey me scenarios #◇˖・ﾟ— › cosmic obey me . ⊹

[ace-antagonist-writes]

Maybe someday soon,

Word count: 3.7k

Summary: After your team’s plans literally go up in smoke, a tense car ride leads into a much tenser situation with a certain natural disaster. (Vash and Reader are both hopeless romantics)

A/N: First actual post on this acc and I’m here to help clear out my Trigun brain rot, might make a part 2 if anyones interested. Also, I wrote this with the OG/ Badlands designs in mind but you could probably imagine other Vash to this as well! (this is also unedited since i hate rereading my own work-)

.

.

.

You’d think it was deadly for a human to run this hot. Maybe it was and maybe you’d drop dead from embarrassment if this would continue, who was to say?

The day had started any other way it had for the last few months. A lone desert horizon staring back at you as your little caravan traveled to a nearby city to take refuge before nightfall hit. Boredom hung over your head like a cloud of dust, so you began to look sound in the small enclosure. The van was high-strung with bated breath, the tension a cough away from popping poor Meryl’s temper. If you hadn’t been so terrified of the feisty woman, you could’ve snorted at the red vein barely visible on her cheek from your backseat angle. Desperate to find something else to focus on, your eyes drifted to Milly in the passenger seat blissfully unaware of the situation. You flashed her a smile when your eyes met in the mirror and she happily returned it before spacing off again on who knows what.

Now here came the hard part.

It was a wonder the silence had managed to dwell so long with the noisy blond and priest sitting beside you. Perhaps the two brain cells the three of you seldom shared–one of which you held on to the longest and the other bounced between the males– sparked together and formed a quiet game of who could outlast Meryl’s rage the longest. Nevertheless, your confidence held strong as you looked to cast a glance at Wolfwood in the opposite window seat. He was turned fully to the window, wispy stripes of dark hair obscuring most of his profile and hand holding up his chin. Thinking you were in the clear of not breaking into laughter looking at him you flicked your gaze onto the window.

Oh no. The two of you had formulated the same idea and were now staring at one another’s blank-faced reflection in the window. The dark tan of his skin pinched together and furrowed at the crease of his nose, clearly taken aback by the reflection as he struggled to re-straighten his face. You quickly turned your head as conspicuously as you could and placed your forehead on the warmed glass. A hearty smile had slipped its way across your face, what a goofball. It was embarrassing how attached you had gotten to everyone in such an objectively short time. Even with the scoldings included, you never once lost any amount of love for any of your friends. There was nothing you would trade for moments like this, despite having grated on Meryl’s nerves the entire morning before now. But to be fair, it was a bit of her fault as well for carrying a humanoid typhoon across No Man’s Land for this long. Insurance company be damned if you were in her place, the amount of times you’ve almost gotten stitched up would’ve put you into early retirement long ago.

….Speaking of the Humanoid typhoon,

Snapping out of your pondering state, you came to realize the silence had strangely returned. You glanced to your left, trying to spare a peek at your agitated driver to see if she was still ill-tempered. You got you answer with haste as her eyes raced to meet your curious ones peering at her through the side mirrors of the vehicle. It was like the devil himself snagged your heart out of your chest as your eyes spasmed trying to grasp at anything else within your range of view. How was someone barely up to your shoulder so scary?? The peeling leather of her seat is what dragged you back away from her wrathful glare, and even then you could’ve sworn the heat from it dug a hole through the sweat of your brow. Maybe it would be best if you didn’t follow your mind’s wonderings and left Vash in the back of your head. Yet as the harsh red of his mangy jacket appeared for a split second in your peripherals, you knew you were a goner. To make things worse, a subtle scraping made itself known alongside the white noise of the van. It was dull and flaky, not unlike the scratching of… a paint brush? Your noise scrunched up in thought as you looked for the source. Milly met you halfway when turning to her, casting a copy of your pensiveness right back as she peek over her shoulder. A honeyed eyebrow rose in a silent question before her gaze shifted up.

A loud clap sent a jolt through the backseat riders up and into a state of alert as Milly slapped a single hand over her mouth. Your own eyebrows kissed the beginnings of your hairline as you reared back in your seat a bit, slowly ascending your head to what she was turning an alarming shade of red at. On the way, you made eye contact again with the equally wired priest across from you. Only briefly sparring a single glance, you both looked up.

You don’t know whether it was due to the unbearable lack of entertainment or if it was just that funny, but only the lord knows how hard of a cacophonous laugh erupted from you either way. Poor, poor tall and lanky Vash sat stiff as a board between Wolfwood and you, caked in soot from the disaster the group had just come from. Wherever the dark graininess hadn’t settled, a brilliant red matching his iconic coat painted his sun-kissed skin. And his hair, the bristled blond strands smushed and sprang outwards, creating the illusion of an angry red pineapple as he slightly swished back and forth with the swaying of the van. Vash looked to be struggling more than you and the priest had–seeing as he had to stare at his reflection through the rearview mirror the entire time since you all had. However, all hell had broke loose upon your cracking up as Vash and Wolfwood burst into cackles and hollering. Tears poured out of all your eyes, soaking dried and dusty faces previously chapped from the heat. And if you had any sense left, you would’ve looked to see the expression on Meryl’s face beside the giggling Milly. Unfortunately, you didn’t get the chance and had to live on without knowing the exasperated smile inching across her face.

——————————————————-

.

.

.

"Why am I the only one in trouble?!" You found yourself wailing into the dark night as you trudged to the bar. "They laughed too Meryl!"

The woman's stride never paused as she walked in front of you with her back straight. Meryl scoffed back at you and dished out a single glance, "But who laughed first?"

"But-"

"Besides! We need someone sober enough to find the motel, and that will surely not be me after the little stunt you guys pulled in the last town!” She huffed a piece of her dark fringe away from her eyes and took a sharp turn, “I pray they weren’t set up with the company’s insurance plan, if so, this might be the last drinking session we can afford.”

You’d have to admit even though she was joking, you felt a little bad for Meryl. Maybe thats why for the rest of the way to the bar, you quietly sulked in front of the batch of traitors behind you. The two bubbly blondes and sleek priest were quiet as mice up until you all entered the bar– trying to camouflage into the darkness to avoid getting a ban on their drinking as well. Yet as soon as you all set foot in the bar, all four of your comrades hauled themselves to the bar and sparked the whole atmosphere of the room.

It was endearing in a way, even though you were a bit bitter you couldn’t be drunkenly stumbling over your words as you chatted the night away. But also if you had, you wouldn’t have been able to be fully enamored by a blond “maniac” who had managed to convince an equally drunk patron to dance with him on a table. You brought the back of your hand to your mouth and stifled the laugh building up in fear of being dragged up while sober enough to remember it happening.

However, all was in vain as you met a pair of teal downturned eyes looking straight at you. Vash was clearly plastered, but somehow managed to start working his way to you without stumbling out of his boots. His laughter made your brain work overtime to keep up with your heart running like a bat out of hell. You were certain that someone could hear the noise as you frantically darted your eyes around to divert your attention away from Vash. The drunken man was not even a foot away from you when he tripped on his way to you. And you could swear for a split second, a brown pair of dress shoes was the object in question. The blonde, dazed and confused, limply fell forward and clung to you tightly. You could’ve died at that single moment.

He was warm, and not in the way the sands were. It was such a comforting warmth that your mind blanked when he had wrapped his arms around you. The noise from the bar faded into a dull hum as Vash fully engulfed your senses. His right arm slightly twitches around you, as if trying to pull you impossibly closer. A rhythmic thumping pulsed inside your chest, and you prayed that he wouldn’t be able to feel it through layers of clothes and burning skin. Your breath hitched as he grazed the side of your neck, slowly moving up and stopping just below your ear. You were sick with anticipation and he slowly opened his eyes to look at you before speaking,

.

.

“I really have to use the bathroom.”

Dear lord.

So here you were, holding up a blazing hot Vash who was thoughly struggling to find the ground beneath him. You tried not to look at him too long–you fear if you did you’d let him fall in the chilled sand after the stunt he’d pulled earlier. Your face was still scorched with the heat of embarrassment that should’ve been drunkenness. Nevertheless, you trudged forward and led the train of dazed insurance company workers, a buzzed priest, and a totaled outlaw. It seemed everyone lucked out since the walk wasn’t long at all, the rickety building coming up just short of 3 minutes away.

You reered your head around to shout the news, earning disgruntled groans and a half-hearted cheer from Milly. Old and tired wooden boards wailed underneath yours and Vash’s feet as you both stepped up at the same time. He losely threw his right arm out to reach the door handle, and even though he missed it by a wide mark, you appreciated the effort. Soft lights brighten and illuminate the small motel lobby as you all piled in. The front desk attendee was a pleasantly aged woman, gray wisps spiraling from under her hat and kissing the faint wrinkles of her forehead. You gave an exasperated smile as you lugged Vash forward, “Reservation for Stryfe?”

“Stryfe you say? Okay my dear, let me just look and see-” She leaned forward a bit towards the registry booklet, “Ah! There it is, let me get your keys sweetheart.”

You nodded as you felt a slight tug on your sleeve, glancing upwards you come face to face with a teary-eyed pout. A single brow of yours hitches up, signaling him to continue with whatever he was trying to get at.

“...I need to use the bathroom again.”

“You just went!”

“Please!!” The lanky man twisted you around the best he could, “You don’t want my bladder to explode do you??”

You bit your tongue to not mutter a yes and send the blonde into a crying fit, instead slamming your hand over the first key you saw presented. With a labored huff you turned to Milly, currently the least drunk of the trio bracing themselves against the wall, “Mills, you think you can manage getting you three to your rooms while I’m gone?”

To which she reply with a lazy salute and a “You can count on me!” before grabbing two other keys and darting off with Meryl and Wolfwood draped on her shoulders. What a sweet girl.

And now to deal with your not-so-sweet outlaw that you hurriedly pull to the room where he would be staying. You’d nearly dropped and lost the key in hand when he dramatically clutched his stomach and shouted in the long hallway. Scared out of your skin, you turn to him in fear he actually wasn’t playing with you earlier about the bladder situation; but were met with a sly smile at the shocked expression displayed on your face. You huffed and tugged at him again, trying not to indulge in his antics. Undeterred, he let out another shrill yell as you dragged him closer to his room,

“HELP, HELP! It’s Vash the Sta-mmph!”

You slap a swift hand over his mouth and shove him into the newly opened door, locking it behind you. Red-faced, you shoot a dead glare at the spindly man currently splayed out in front of you. Vash’s lips twist into a playful wobbly smile as he stares up at you, only to shapely point downwards when you point to the bathroom door. His eyebrows crease his sunburnt skin in a sad attempt to imitate a kicked puppy–yet he relents and gives up when a vein makes itself present on your temple. Well after he’s settled into the bathroom, you lean against the wall to catch your breath for a brief second. How in the world was he this hopeless? You’d have to give it to him despite how agitated you were at his earlier stunt, his hopelessness was endearing in a way. A tired hand swiped the sweat from your brow as you flush faintly, god he would be the death of you. A muffled thunk from the other side of the bathroom door rips you from pondering about the culprit at hand. Hopefully Vash would be competent enough to figure out how to survive on his own until daybreak. You push off the wall and leave the room, starting off back down the hall to claim your room key so you can finally retire to bed.

The walk was ten times short without dragging drunken extra luggage on your shoulder throughout the halls. You stop at the front desk, which was now missing the woman attending it just a few minutes ago. It was eerily silent in the lobby, with no one being up and lounging about the area. At a sudden creak, your head swivels to a door not far away from the desk. Seemingly oblivious to your figure standing awkwardly behind the table, the young man glides to a drawer obscured front desk. He pulls out a booklet resembling the registration sheet the kind woman had checked form. The new attendee acknowledges your existence with a sparring glance,

“Name?”

The suddeness of his statement was enough to spike your nerves, “Ah! Oh, registration for Stryfe please! I’m here to pick up the fourth key?”

His eyes narrowed for a split second, “Four? There’s only three in the registry for Stryfe.”

“What?? Surely there must’ve been a mistake, there’s five of us with two sharing a room!” You mentally made a note to hide Meryl’s handover medicine if what the attendee said was true, that you would have to bunk with a clingy blond for the night. The man behind the counter just sighed tiredly at you,

“I’m sorry, but we don’t have any more openings left for the night. You’d have to sleep in one of the other reserved rooms.”

Your ears burned with embarrassment, “Can you at least tell me the other two room numbers?” Maybe you could bribe Wolfwood with the promise of another pack of cigarettes in exchange for a room to yourself.

Unfortunately, the attendee had made it his momentary pleasure to crush your pipe-dreaming. He slowly blinked at you, “Are you Meryl Stryfe?”

“...No?”

“Then I am sorry, we cannot disclose room patrons without consent of the booker themselves. Have a nice night.”

“You’ve gotta be joking me.”

“Not paid enough to do so, unfortunately.” He looked a good decade older as he muttered the statement to you through gritted teeth, “Have a nice night.”

And with that, your one-sided argument came to a close as you had no choice but to secede. In all honesty, you could pass out in the hallway and call it a day with all the walking going on. You wish you knew why this felt so nerve racking, he was your friend and the same went for you—or at least you hoped. Yet, the blonde had such a baffling way of turning your whole world upside down without even trying. It intimidated you just as much as it made your heart flutter. He was so breathtaking, enough to piss you off in a jealous haze if you weren’t his friend. You were set in stone on this revelation, and nothing would be able to shake that away from your perception of Vash. The door knob contrasts your warm palms as you open the frigid door.

Upon opening it, the world seems to instantaneously freeze when you come face to face with a half-dressed outlaw. You didn’t even have time to truly process his reaction, and dignity be damned at this point. Your eyes nailed themselves to Vash’s torso like they were meant to be there; and if you were actually cognitive, you would’ve chastised yourself for staring so shamelessly. But in all honesty, could you be blamed for looking?

Yes, you were hurt by the mangled skin of his body with pink skin coating the sunny canvas of his chest. And yes, you knew somewhere in the back of your mind you would shed tears for every one of them you hadn’t saw happen admits your journey together. But dear lord above, was he ethereal. The lankiness you normally associated with him was heavily disproven from what you could clearly see now. He was sturdily built—even with his arms frozen in a pose reaching for his backpack— and astonishingly lean. There were so many words you wished to say, to voice your unconscious fawning over him. You opened your mouth slowly and dazed,

“Vash, yo-”

“DON’T LOOK DON’T LOOK!” He shrieked out, arms flying up to cover anything they could.

Your hands sounded like gunshots as they collided against your eyes. Stupid, stupid! Everything that had echoed dully in your brain crashed together in a cacophonous tragedy as you came to your senses. And by the sounds of it, Vash found himself in the same predicament. Audible thrashes and shrill “eeks!” were the only way you could tell he still remained in the room. He quieted down a bit as he rummaged through his bag—for a shirt you predicted. There was no doubt in your mind he was sober from your shared mental breakdown, albeit one was far more vocal than the other. You felt ashamed in your actions, and were no better than a peeping Tom!

You scrambled to make an apology, something to atone for the embarrassing act you just committed against him. But before you could, he beat you to it.

“…I’m sorry you had to see that, I really am, it’s not a pretty sight and I’m sorry you-”

“That wasn’t what I was thinking at all,” You exhaled. “I was thinking about how pretty you were… in the…moonlight?”

It came out as a doubting question but the words you spoke couldn’t be any truer. Vash was extremely beautiful, far more than your words could ever tell.

…Meanwhile, he looked at you like you had just shot him in the foot at point blank range. His cheeks were a hazy flush and his eyes darted around your face crazily, looking at every single feature sitting upon it. You slightly shrunk under his intense surveying, a bit confused on what he was doing.

“Sooo, are you gonna say som-”

“YOU LOOK PRETTY TOO!” He jumped to cut you off and leaned forward a bit to accentuate his profession. The blush sitting on his cheeks flowed bashfully to his neck and chest—at least what wasn’t covered by his loose shirt— as he shifted nervously. “In the moonlight as well, I mean.” A cheeky smirk appeared after he spoke, as if he hadn’t fumbled as hard as you did.

What a tease.

“Is that why you were looking at me so hard? You liked what you saw as much as I did, hm?” You leaned forward a bit, mirroring his anxious actions.

“What’s not to like?” Vash’s smirk turned into a charming smile, “Women all across town would want a chance to get with the Humanoid Typhoon, you know!”

“Oh I know alright.” You roll your eyes in exasperation, “So what about me, I got a chance with Vash the Stampede?”

His face blew up in a furious blush again at your teasing tone, you got him. A snickered laugh bubbled from your chest as he tried to come up with something else so that he could win.

You can believe you were nervous to bunk with him for the night, did you seriously forget who he is? The laughter smothered all the attempts he made to make a jab at you, but you couldn’t focus on them anyway. Everything in your mind at the moment was swarming with him instead. Of his genuine laugh, of his jokes, of his lanky arms throwing themselves around you to give you a hug. Memories, thoughts, and words unspoken you always wanted to say just made you giggle all the more at him for just being. With all your heart, you wished he would have the same thoughts as you at least once.

And yet, if you weren’t so oblivious maybe you would’ve seen it.

Another lovestruck fool looking longingly at the one they fell head over heels for.

#vash x reader #trigun x reader #vash the stampede x reader #trigun 1998 #trigun stampede #vash x you #vash the stampede #trigun

[richincolor]

We have a whopping FOURTEEN books on our radar for today! Check them out--you've got great odds you'll find something to add to your TBR list!

All This Twisted Glory (This Woven Kingdom #3) by Tahereh Mafi HarperCollins

As the long-lost heir to the Jinn throne, Alizeh has finally found her people—and she might’ve found her crown. Cyrus, the mercurial ruler of Tulan, has offered her his kingdom in a twisted exchange: one that would begin with their marriage and end with his murder. Cyrus’s dark reputation precedes him; all the world knows of his blood-soaked past. Killing him should be easy—and accepting his offer might be the only way to fulfill her destiny and save her people. But the more Alizeh learns of him, the more she questions whether the terrible stories about him are true. Ensnared by secrets, Cyrus has ached for Alizeh since she first appeared in his dreams many months ago. Now that he knows those visions were planted by the devil, he can hardly bear to look at her—much less endure her company. But despite their best efforts to despise each other, Alizeh and Cyrus are drawn together over and over with an all-consuming thirst that threatens to destroy them both. Meanwhile, Prince Kamran has arrived in Tulan, ready to exact revenge… Layered with exquisite tension and heart-stopping romance, All This Twisted Glory is the explosive third book in the captivating, bestselling This Woven Kingdom series.

ASAP by Axie Oh HarperTeen

Sori has worked her whole life to become a K-pop idol, until she realizes she doesn’t want a life forever in the spotlight. But that’s not actually up to Sori—she’s caught between her exacting mother’s entertainment company and her father’s presidential aspirations. And as the pressure to keep her flawless public image grows, the last person she should be thinking about is her ex-boyfriend. Nathaniel is off limits—she knows this. A member of one of the biggest K-pop bands in the world and forbidden from dating, he isn’t any more of an option now than he was two years ago. Still, she can’t forget that their whirlwind romance was the last time she remembers being really happy. Or that his family welcomed her into their home when she needed it most. . . . So when Nathaniel finds himself rocked by scandal, Sori offers him a hideaway with her. And back in close quarters, it’s hard to deny their old feelings. But when Sori gets an opportunity to break free from her parent’s expectations, she will have to decide: Is her future worth sacrificing for a second chance at love?

Bless the Blood: A Cancer Memoir by Walela Nehanda Kokila

A searing debut YA poetry and essay collection about a Black cancer patient who faces medical racism after being diagnosed with leukemia in their early twenties, for fans of Audre Lorde's The Cancer Journals and Laurie Halse Anderson's Shout . When Walela is diagnosed at twenty-three with advanced stage blood cancer, they're suddenly thrust into the unsympathetic world of tubes and pills, doctors who don’t use their correct pronouns, and hordes of "well-meaning" but patronizing people offering unsolicited advice as they navigate rocky personal relationships and share their story online. But this experience also deepens their relationship to their ancestors, providing added support from another realm. Walela's diagnosis becomes a catalyst for their self-realization. As they fill out forms in the insurance office in downtown Los Angeles or travel to therapy in wealthier neighborhoods, they begin to understand that cancer is where all forms of their oppression Disabled. Fat. Black. Queer. Nonbinary. In Bless the A Cancer Memoir, the author details a galvanizing account of their survival despite the U.S. medical system, and of the struggle to face death unafraid.

Bright Red Fruit by Safia Elhillo Make Me a World

An unflinching, honest novel in verse about a teenager's journey into the slam poetry scene and the dangerous new relationship that could threaten all her dreams. From the award-winning poet and author of HOME IS NOT A COUNTRY. Bad girl. No matter how hard Samira tries, she can’t shake her reputation. She’s never gotten the benefit of the doubt—not from her mother or the aunties who watch her like a hawk. Samira is determined to have a perfect summer filled with fun parties, exploring DC, and growing as a poet—until a scandalous rumor has her grounded and unable to leave her house. When Samira turns to a poetry forum for solace, she catches the eye of an older, charismatic poet named Horus. For the first time, Samira feels wanted. But soon she’s keeping a bigger secret than ever before—one that that could prove her reputation and jeopardize her place in her community. In this gripping coming-of-age novel from the critically acclaimed author Safia Elhillo, a young woman searches to find the balance between honoring her family, her artistry, and her authentic self.

Daniel, Deconstructed by James Ramos Inkyard Press

A nerdy high schooler learns to embrace his main-character energy in this witty and heart-healing ode to movie tropes, meet-cutes, and LGBTQ+ love. Photographer and film buff Daniel Sanchez learned a long time ago that the only way to get by in an allistic world is to mask his autism and follow the script. Which means he knows that boisterous, buff, and beautiful soccer superstars like his best friend, Mona Sinclair, shouldn’t be wasting time hanging out with introverts who prefer being behind the camera. So when Daniel meets a new classmate, Gabe Mendes, who is tall, mysterious, nonbinary, and—somehow—as cool as Mona, Daniel knows exactly how this is going to play out. Mona and Gabe will meet cute, win their nominations for Homecoming Court, and ride off into the sunset together. Daniel just needs to do a little behind-the-scenes directing. But matchmaking means stepping into the mystifying and illogical world of love, dating, and relationships, where nothing is as it seems and no one knows their lines. And when Daniel finds himself playing a starring role in this romance, he’ll question everything he thought he knew about himself and his place in the world.

The Girl, the Ring, & the Baseball Bat by Camille Gomera-Tavarez Levine Querido

Rosie: Capricorn. Does great in class. Wants nothing more than to get into the prestigious Innovation Technical Institute and kiss this awful school goodbye. Her talisman: a magical jacket from her mother’s past that gets people to do whatever she says. Caro: Leo. Rosie’s older sister. Always been closer to their estranged father – and always butted heads more with their strict mother. A trip to Dominican Republic for her father’s wedding leads her deep into family history that clears up any illusions about her parents she’s ever had. Her talisman: a baseball bat that fixes whatever it breaks. Zeke: Certified Triple Pisces. Up in cold-ass Jersey City living with his aunt after his grandmother dies and his father moves to London to take care of his mother. He crushes on EVERYone – he knows he’ll find happiness in love, and maybe a way out of this depression. His talisman: a manifestation stone that will make anyone fall in love with him. Rosie, Caro, and Zeke – and their talismans – find themselves intertwined in a magical, hilarious, and whip-smart Outsiders for the modern day, written by Camille Gomera-Tavarez, a 2022 Publishers Weekly Flying Start.

How the Boogeyman Became a Poet by Tony Keith Katherine Tegen Books

Poet, writer, and hip-hop educator Tony Keith Jr. makes his debut with a powerful YA memoir in verse, tracing his journey from being a closeted gay Black teen battling poverty, racism, and homophobia to becoming an openly gay first-generation college student who finds freedom in poetry. Perfect for fans of Elizabeth Acevedo, George M. Johnson, and Jacqueline Woodson. Tony dreams about life after high school, where his poetic voice can find freedom on the stage and page. But the Boogeyman has been following Tony since he was six years old. First, the Boogeyman was after his Blackness, but Tony has learned It knows more than Tony wants to be the first in his family to attend college, but there’s no path to follow. He also has feelings for boys, desires that don’t align with the script he thinks is set for him and his girlfriend, Blu. Despite a supportive network of family and friends, Tony doesn’t breathe a word to anyone about his feelings. As he grapples with his sexuality and moves from high school to college, he struggles with loneliness while finding solace in gay chat rooms and writing poetry. But how do you find your poetic voice when you are hiding the most important parts of yourself? And how do you escape the Boogeyman when it's lurking inside you?

I Hope This Doesn't Find You by Ann Liang Scholastic Press

Sadie Wen is perfect on paper: school captain, valedictorian, and a "pleasure to have in class." It’s not easy, but she has a trick to keep her model-student smile plastered on her face at all times: she channels all her frustrations into her email drafts. She'd never send them of course -- she'd rather die than hurt anyone's feelings -- but it's a relief to let loose on her power-hungry English teacher or a freeloading classmate taking credit for Sadie's work. All her most vehemently worded emails are directed at her infuriating cocaptain, Julius Gong, whose arrogance and competitive streak have irked Sadie since they were kids. "You're attention starved and self-obsessed and unbearably vain . . . I really hope your comb breaks and you run out of whatever expensive hair products you've been using to make your hair appear deceptively soft..." Sadie doesn't have to hold back in her emails, because nobody will ever read them... that is, until they're accidentally sent out. Overnight, Sadie’s carefully crafted, conflict-free life is turned upside down. It's her worst nightmare -- now everyone at school knows what she really thinks of them, and they're not afraid to tell her what they really think of her either. But amidst the chaos, there's one person growing to appreciate the "real" Sadie -- Julius, the only boy she's sworn to hate...

Infinity Alchemist (Infinity Alchemist #1) by Kacen Callendar Tor Teen

For Ash Woods, practicing alchemy is a crime. Only an elite few are legally permitted to study the science of magic―so when Ash is rejected by the Lancaster Mage’s College, he takes a job as the school’s groundskeeper instead, forced to learn alchemy in secret. When he’s discovered by the condescending and brilliant apprentice Ramsay Thorne, Ash is sure he's about to be arrested―but instead of calling the reds, Ramsay surprises Ash by making him an offer: Ramsay will keep Ash's secret if he helps her find the legendary Book of Source, a sacred text that gives its reader extraordinary power. As Ash and Ramsay work together and their feelings for each other grow, Ash discovers their mission is more dangerous than he imagined, pitting them against influential and powerful alchemists―Ash’s estranged father included. Ash’s journey takes him through the cities and wilds across New Anglia, forcing him to discover his own definition of true power and how far he and other alchemists will go to seize it.

No Time Like Now by Naz Kutub Bloomsbury

It's been one year since Hazeem's father passed away unexpectedly, and one year since Hazeem got his special ability: He can grant any living thing extra time. Since then, he's been randomly granting people more years to live: his old friend Holly, his study buddy Yamany, his crush Jack. . . . The only problem is, none of them wanted to spend any of that time with Hazeem. Now, Hazeem spends most of his days with his grandmother. When she experiences a heart attack, Hazeem is quick to use his power to save her--until Time themself appears and tells Hazeem he has accrued a time debt, having given away more life than he has left to live and putting the entire timeline in serious danger of collapse. In order to save the timeline and himself, Hazeem must take back some of the life he has granted other people. Suddenly, Hazeem is on a journey through and against time, but as he confronts the events of the past, he must confront the mistakes he made along the way. Hazeem will come to realize that when it comes to time, quality is more important to quantity--but is it too late to reclaim the life he's given away so he can really start living? No Time Like Now is a timely twist on A Christmas Carol that takes readers on a thought-provoking adventure, asking what matters most in life.

Out of Body by Nia Davenport Balzer + Bray

A high-stakes, propulsive YA thriller with a body-swap twist thoughtfully exploring themes of friendship and identity, perfect for fans of Tiffany D. Jackson. Seventeen-year-old Megan Allen has been jumping from friend group to friend group in her high school, trying on identities like outfits. Nothing ever seems to fit—until she meets LC, the adventurous, charismatic girl who appears at her favorite coffee shop one day like magic. Finally, Megan feels like she’s becoming the person she’s meant to be: someone like LC. On the night of their friendiversary, what was supposed to be a bonding experience ends in a waking nightmare. Suddenly, Megan is no longer herself. Too late, she realizes that LC has secrets—dangerous ones. Betrayed by her best friend, thrust into another girl’s life, and targeted by LC’s enemies, she must claim what makes Megan Megan to get her life back . . . or die trying.

Pangu's Shadow by Karen Bao Carolrhoda Lab

There are no second chances in the Pangu Star System. Ver and Aryl, apprentices at the most prestigious biology lab among the system’s moons, know this better than anyone. They’ve left behind difficult pasts and pinned their hopes for the future on Cal, their brilliant but difficult boss. But one night while working late in the lab, they find Cal sprawled on the floor, dead. Murdered. And they immediately become the prime suspects. Their motives seem obvious. Ver, who left her home moon to study the life-threatening disease wracking her body, had a hopeless attachment to Cal that could’ve become twisted by jealousy. Aryl, on the other hand, clashed with workaholic Cal because she valued more in her life besides research. To clear their names, Ver and Aryl put aside their mutual suspicion and team up to investigate Cal’s death. As they search for the real murderer, they uncover secrets that have shaped all of Pangu’s moons… and must decide what kind of future they really want.

Relit: 16 Latinx Remixes of Classic Stories edited by Sandra Proudman Inkyard Press

These sixteen stories by award-winning and bestselling YA authors center a Latinx point of view in an empowering anthology that reimagines classics through fantasy, science fiction, and with a dash of magic, for fans of A PHOENIX FIRST MUST BURN and RECLAIM THE STARS In classic stories remixed, Latinx characters take center stage Pride and Prejudice is launched into outer space, Frankenstein is plunged into the depths of the ocean, and The Great Gatsby floats to an island off the coast of Costa Rica. A shape-shifter gives up her life to save the boy she loves from an evil bruja. La Ciguapa covets a little mermaid’s heart of gold. Two star-crossed teens fall in love while the planet burns around them. Whether characters fall in love, battle foes, or grow through grief, each story will empower readers to see themselves as the heroes of the stories that make our world.

You're Breaking my Heart by Olugbemisola Rhuday-Perkovich Levine Querido

Harriet Adu knows that her brother's death is her fault. I mean, it's not actually her fault, but it still kinda is, isn't it? She would do anything to live in a world where she could take back what she said that morning. Then a strange girl shows up at Harriet's high school – a girl who loves the same weird books Harriet does, who doesn't vibe with anyone at school the same way Harriet does – and that different world suddenly seems possible. The girl speaks of a place underneath the subways of New York, where people like them can go and find a home. A place away from the world of high school, grief, cool people, and depression. A place where one may be able to bend the lines of reality and get a second chance at being a better person. Will Harriet open the door? With You're Breaking My Heart , award-winning author Olugbemisola Rhuday-Perkovich offers a remarkable speculative novel that will hit home for anyone who yearns for that one chance to do things over.

#new releases #all this twisted glory #asap #bless the blood #bright red fruit #daniel deconstructed #the girl the ring and the baseball bat #how the boogeyman became a poet #i hope this doesn't find you #infinity alchemist #no time like now #out of body #pangu's shadow #relit #you're breaking my heart

[saltygilmores]

THOUGHTS WHILE WATCHING GILMORE GIRLS: S3/EP6: TAKE THE DEVILED EGGS (Pt 2) (This One's Gonna Be a Real Rage Inducer) (Lots Of Interesting Development Though) (So many things happening) (Salty Rambles about Jess Mariano's Birthday)

There is something to be said about Luke (on multiple occasions) readily admitting he pays Jess in ketchup packets to toil in the Coffee Mines more or less against his will. I get that it's just a part time job after school...before school..while he's cutting school..always working...never stopping...never reicieving any tips from Lorelai and Rory... Rory needs a job... Rory and Lorelai need to pay for their food... Anyway these comments shed a light on the shaky economies of small businesses in small towns which is interesting to me. Gilmore Girls is really, at it's core, a show about class. One day he could wake up to find his diner has been turned into a Dunkin Donuts (this is Not-Quite-But-Almost-New England after all, where DD is king).

Hahahahaha!! Jess stole money to buy a car and he committs attempted murder! Hahahahaaha! You're SO FUNNY LORELAI GILMORE. Your daughter stole a boat.

Yeah. And maybe back home, he did had to steal to survive sometimes. How about them apples, Lorelai Gilmore. God, do I loathe her.

Don't say that around Lorelai, I think she'd believe you were being serious.

A couple of the moots and I recently decided that in the recent past, Liz managed to land and then lose a halfway decent boyfriend/ father figure to Jess who had a car and taught Jess to drive and do repairs and some other light adulting. I honestly feel like this is the only thing that makes sense.

HE LOOKS SO GOOD IN THIS SCENE!!! Fuck meeee. Look at that li'l curl...

LOOK AT IT!!!! You know what, I'm calling it. I'm putting my foot down. This is the hottest Milo had ever looked in the entirety of seasons 2 and 3. It's that perfectly gelled hair, the jean jacket, the cool tshirt. Very James Dean. Woof. Let's see, what would I choose for second place? I have to go with the party scene in KegMax, another episode with impeccably jelled hair and a jean jacket (and even while he was apparently sick shooting that episode too). He just progresses in hotness the further season 3 marches on.

These four words "I'm still a minor" are a point of contention for me in the ongoing debate about his birth month. My beliefs: Jess is a Virgo. He was born in August or early September. This would make him just older than Rory by just a smidge. Since well over a year has passed in the show since the episode he arrived in Stars Hollow as a 17 year old (when he arrived, it was early September as Rory had just started school in that episode), he had just celebrated his birthday before arriving and so he has to have already turned 18 by this episode. However, I will consider the theory that Luke was clueless or misinformed about his age at the time he arrived (because it's not like LIz is in any way reliable with information) and he was actually 16 going on 17 when he hopped off the bus last year, and maybe he has an October or November birthday making him slightly younger than Rory. It would make sense that both missed the kindergarten cut off dates in 1989 at their respective schools (which is rock solid canon already for Rory, as she was born in October 84 but graduated in 03 instead of 02), putting them in the same grade.

Salty has put a pathetic amount of thought into this. So, how can I accept this statemen? I attribute it to the same brand of biting sarcasm that gave us "I mugged an old lady" moments ago and also because this scene doesn't make a whole lot of sense to begin with. He's still a minor, but he got his own insurance all by himself under his own name, which is not really a thing, but not his own car registration? Committing insurance fraud perhaps? Sketchy insurance company that didn't ask too many questions? He knows a guy who knows a guy who can print up some fake documents? At that point why not go all the way with the white collar crimes and forge Luke's signature on the registration too? See, Lorelai thinks Jess is a thief and murderer when he's really a white collar criminal like Taylor Doose.

My memory was certain that he produced a cigarrette and not a pen in this scene. I had to edit this post to remove a line about him smoking. I guess I confused it with the Then She Appears/ Cmurrh kissing scene, where he's also wearing a jean jacket with a popped collar. Damn. I can't wait for that scene...

Just some light fraud. If the car belonged to someone in Stars Hollow, whoever's registration he stole probably deserved it anyway. This is how I approach all "Crimes" Jess commits in Stars Hollow. There are only a few people who don't deserve it. Your honor, my client is innocent.

Oh no, the couch of doom. No good conversations ever happens between Rory and Lorelai on the couch, especially after one of them comes home at night and finds the other one on the couch. The Gilmores recieve an invitation to Sherry's baby shower. The moots and I have determined that Doula and Gigi will eventually band together to form the most powerful duo of neglected half sisters the world has ever seen. For the record, today Doula would be 17 and Gigi would be 21. Since Jess eventually comes to adopt and raises Doula she has a somewhat decent chance of coming out a well adjusted adult. At the very least, if she was stuck with TJ and Liz, Jess would still be a positive influence on her life, visit her and look out for her and make sure she didn't get sucked into any cults. The odds are a lot more grim for Gigi with Crusty and Sherry as her forever "parents" and let's face it, very likely her relationship with big sister Rory or any of the other Gilmores is non existent.

And things were so peaceful. Especially since Dean hasn't reared his ugly head in the last two episodes, either.

You flip flop with Crusty so much how can anyone possibly keep track of whether you're on the outs with him or banging him at any given time?

And by saying that out loud you're gonna tip the balance of the universe and he's going to show up. I looked ahead and although this is sadly still a Crusty-Focused episode, he doesn't actually make an appearance. Small blessings. To Lorelai's surprise, Rory admits that she's been in contact with Crusty and Lorelai is okay with it but upset that Rory was hiding it from her. God, he's such a parasite.

Emails. How quaint.

Highly debatable.

#gilmore girls #denise rewatches gilmore girls #gilmore girls season 3 #TDDE #Take the Deviled Eggs #Rory Gilmore #Lorelai Gilmore #Jess Mariano #Luke Danes #Milo Ventimiglia

[pebblysand]

1 and 4 from the fic asks :)

hello!! thank you!!

1. What's something new that you tried in a fic this year? How did it turn out and would you do it again?

oooh the tumblr police is gonna hate me for this but... chatgpt! yup, newsflash, i write with chatgpt.

but... there's a caveat to that. i recently heard an interview from alexandre astier (who is probably one of my favourite writers in the world) in hot ones where he was talking about the way he uses AI in his writing, and i could not agree more. the thing is: AI is a tool. it's a tool that, in a few years, will probably replace a lot of IRL jobs, mine included. it is also a tool that will sadly likely also replace a lot of writers who write content-mill-like articles or work for big production companies, because a lot of corporations will want to maximise profit. it is a tragedy.

but AI will never replace art. it will never replace writing. because as he explains, both as a consumer and a writer, what matters in art is the human aspect of it. artistic creation is the source of human connection, and art is only really interesting because it was made by humans. an AI could write ten times as beautifully as - well, him, one of my favourite authors, it wouldn't interest me as much, because i don't care about connecting with a computer. that computer doesn't share our human experience, it doesn't understand things like joy or excitement or depression. it doesn't create, it just writes.

so, i use AI ... as a tool. alexandre astier says he uses it to do stuff he doesn't like like keeping track of plotlines or dates - i actually like building my own outlines and trackers, so i don't use it for that. i do use it for things like: asking it to describe a place for me if i'm trying to find an angle for a visual description, as its one of my weakest writing skills. or, i'll use it to make up the name of a wizarding life insurance company because making up names of magical stuff does not interest me and i'd rather have a computer feed me one and move on than spend 30 minutes looking for it. and, honestly, it's turned out great! it's allowed me to spend the limited time i do have on writing stuff i actually enjoy, so i'll definitely keep using it.

4. what piece of media inspired you the most?

ohhh also a good question! it's hard to do a full year review cause honestly, most of last year already feels like a million years ago, but i'd say right now, i'm very inspired by Ren. if you are subscribed to the castles playlist, you'll know, cause he's been all over the playlist since november/december haha. i genuinely think about that money game part iii video daily. i listened to sick boi on LOOP when i was writing chapter 19 of castles, as well as how to be me. this guy is an actual genius and he writes so well it genuinely makes me ANGRY. i mean, like, i could quote a million lines but she never stood a chance, the devil comes to dance haunts me.

for reasons that i can't explain without spoiling my wip, i'm on hi ren at the moment, so i'll leave you with it:

#asked and answered #hope is the voice that you hear when you loosen the noose on the rope

[orallech]

“Nine People you want to know better” tag game

Tagged by @vasirah ty <3

Last Song: Dead Butterflies by Kid Bloom

Favorite Color: To pick just one it'd have to be blue i love blue every shade of blue. I really like sunset colors and the combination of black and gold oooo. I've noticed I like to use red and a bluish green in a couple of my art pieces tho

Last Movie/TV Show: Last movie was pan's labyrinth I hadn't watched it since i was a kid and it was on tubi so i put it on. Creature design 👍

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: The great sinus infection of January 2018 fucked my nose so bad everything taste dull unless I put cayenne pepper on it. I use to go to town on those ultimate heat corn nuts but they stopped making them or theyre just really hard to find

Relationship status: Monastic in nature. Dedicated to the craft. I'm sitting at my little desk drawing horny images that could get past the catholic church on the basis its about demons or a/the devil. You get the idea

Last thing I googled: "manuscript drawing of a monk" see answer above

Current Obsession: to be brief.....everything going on with Alan wake 2. Also the relationship between knowing the anatomy and knowing the soul. The way you can know something's flesh and bone but not understand the soul and vice versa. Victor stitching a man together, knowing him down to the veins but being terrified of his creation and lacking the element of understanding that makes him just abandon him. How in the first book in the lilith's brood trilogy you see the ooloi know humans down to their basic components but fail so miserably at understanding the emotional needs of them that they keep fucking up the ones they raise. And how in the death of jane lawrence theres an element to the way magic works that if you wanted to bring someone back from the dead you would have to know them body and soul. They'd come out missing organs and being a mirror of how you view them not how they actually were.

Last Book: I'm finally finishing The Hacienda a book i started the first half of 2023 and I'm also reading seven other books at once but mainly focusing on blood of elves rn so i can get to Regis

Looking forward to: Hmmmm looking forward to that game The banishers that seems pretty inchresting to me. Excited for the insurance company to send the check for my totaled car so we can get the little truck we've had forever fixed and I dont gotta be driven to work

tagging: @onewingedangels @shadowknight1224 @screamingay

#tag game #feel free to ignore #too scared to tag anyone else #if you'd like to do this just say i tagged you

[rosefrancaise8]

Lessons learned while on this canal joy ride (in no particular order)

Never go for the cheapest boat option - you will always come across someone whose boat is designed without internal steps, with a bigger bed, a separate toilet and a conventional shower that you can stand under - and then you will wish that you had paid through the nose for it.

There are significant advantages to living in such a small space. The rose` in the fridge is always within arms reach of the kitchen table as is the quiche in the oven. Our apartment at home seems altogether too big now.

Don’t skimp on insurance, especially if you are renting a boat with no forward thrusters - which sounds personal but refers to the boat’s ability to manoeuvre sideways at a moment’s notice. We think we took our own advice but will know for sure when the boat company inspects the boat tomorrow.

Ignore at least half the instructions about what to bring - especially the need for gloves and boat shoes. We used the gloves precisely twice to grip the ropes and then trusted to our innate abilities to hang on for grim death - and we saw not a single drop of moisture on the deck that would cause us to slip over on our high heels.

Ignore the people who say that you need to be able to speak French - it is true that compared to other parts of France that we know there is less English spoken, however people are extremely helpful and eager to understand. Actually David and I part company on this one a bit because as the person least able to speak French on this boat it would have been nice to be able to chat to the lock keepers once in a while and understand the directions they were giving me before I saw panic in their eyes.

One never looks forward to a night in a hotel more than when one has been attempting to sleep and bathe in a little Penichette for 7 nights.

French markets are the best! We bought a huge container of Paella at the Malestoit market this morning because we knew we would be some way from a village when hunger struck. We timed our stop so that David could join his online poetry group, a happy memory in itself. Were it not for that Paella, we would not have known where our next meal was coming from and that is a dangerous situation in a Penichette. I also bought a brightly patterned cotton scarf from the market to go with my chunky blue jumper from Trieste. It was a very chilly morning so I slung it around my neck in my usual devil may care fashion. The stall holder, a man in his 50s, was appalled and hastily retied it for me in such a way that it wouldn’t come adrift. It was good to see at this market the same old underwear stalls for women of a certain age that we have always seen, though at what age I wonder would one finally succumb to their daggy charms.

Driving a barge along a canal is a perfect way to experience the country you are in. You have a destination to reach and you arrange your days around it. You have the luxury of time because these boats are not built for speed and the lock keepers aren't meant to rush around filling and then emptying their locks so that you can go hurtling along at breakneck speed along their canals. If another boat beats you into a lock or comes into the lock behind you (as we experienced for the first time today) everything takes twice as long. You are forced to sit and watch the world by go and reflect on whether the Cormorant you see swimming around with only the very top of its slim neck visible above the water is the same one you saw a kilometre back, and how distant that faraway cuckoo bird call might be. And you can bide your time in the back room of a little cafe, drinking cafe au lait with the locals while you wait for the locks to open at 9am, before which nothing happens on a canal.

It has been a wonderful trip and we are so glad to have experienced it. I will start posting again when we are in Greece.

[brillmindz1]

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[lost-technology]

The Opinion Column

Tri-Tober Fanfic shorts Prompt 7: Newspaper Setting: All canons Summary: Not everyone in Noman's Land believes that the Legend of Vash the Stampede is actually real. (Ft. my Trisona, Shadrach and stupid references to a movie and a Weird Al song).

Prompt 7: Newspaper The Opinion Column The Bernardelli Daily Times October 7, 0154 Vash the Stampede is a Myth Article by Shadrach Sedona We have all heard of this legend, many of us since we were children – the tale of a single, apparently ageless man who destroyed the city of July.  We have also heard the tale of the hole in the Fifth Moon as well as countless other stories.   I’ve seen memes in the comedy section of this very paper claiming that the man ran a marathon with an engine block strapped to his back and that he taught a sandworm to do his laundry.  Where do we begin to tease out the Legend of Vash the Stampede against the reality of such a formidable outlaw, saint or devil?  Why, we even have reporters and insurance agents from the insurance division of this very company chasing him from Octovern to Devil’s Butthole! What if I were to propose to you that the man known as Vash the Stampede does not exist?  Some have speculated that his name is just a legacy, like the old story of the Dread Sand-Pirate Roberts – not a single man, but a name held by many men through the generations.  What if I told you that was bunk, too?  The Hole in the Fifth Moon:  Consider its origin.  A column of light directed straight up into the sky from a pinpoint source that corresponded to a known Plant-location.  July?  Investigations of the ruins turn up traces of nephilic radiation, which, if any of you were taught properly in your high school science classes, is a radiation specific to Biological-Generator Plants.  It is initially-destructive, but doesn’t outright poison the land in a lingering way as gamma radiation does.  It always, however, is associated with catastrophic Plant-failures.  It is my opinion that the governing bodies of the Seven Cities are hiding critical infrastructure failures from us, the People of Noman’s Land.  They are not telling us what the issues with our Plants are and a greater number of them are failing.  They can no longer be replenished.  The technology is lost to us.  Much like the Climate Change Disaster on Earth that led to initial drafting of the old SEEDS-project, we may be in an entirely preventable disaster that global billionaires and the city-governments in their back pockets are trying to hide from us.  How best to do this?  Why of course, it is to tell us that the world is dying because of our bare-bones survival consumption and that it is up to us to solve it while they live it up with exorbitant luxuries.  That, and giving us a scapegoat to distract us, a single figure to revile and write songs about, a creature of fear, a “human force of nature” and on top of that, a promise of $60 Billion for his capture that will never be collected.  Bah! As long as the freedom of press remains in place, I will continue to report – even if the Powers that Be push my “crazy opinions” to the back of this very newspaper!

#trigun #trigun maximum #trigun stampede #vash the stampede #trigun oc #tritober #tri-tober #inktober

[oh-hey-big-zam]

Wheel in the Sky (Keeps on Turning

Post summary: Chrissy hadn't really known Eddie Munson that well before his sudden and mysterious death. Which is why it's a little weird when his ghost shows up in her bedroom.

Pairing: Chrissy Cunningham/Eddie Munson, implied Chrissy Cunningham/Nancy Wheeler

Word count: 23K

Content warnings: Graphic descriptions of violence

The morning that Eddie Munson's untimely death was announced over the school loudspeaker, Chrissy was running late for her homeroom class. She had driven through the pouring rain at a near-crawl in her father's old Chevy and missed the first ten minutes of the school day. Chrissy hated driving in the rain, certain that one wrong move would send her skidding wildly over a nearby embankment and careening into a ravine. Not to mention that the other drivers around her, some of which were her fellow seniors driving to class, seemed to have no concept of their own mortality as they sped ahead of her, honking or flipping her off.

It didn't matter to Chrissy, however, if people were delayed a few seconds in their commute so she could feel safe. Most of her peers had no experience of death or trauma, no inkling of what it meant to lose someone over a simple mistake. She wished she could say the same, but she'd lost her father five years ago to a work accident. He'd been an electrician, working on overhead power lines in some rich neighborhood on the far side of town, when he'd fallen and broken his neck on impact. The insurance payment from the company he'd worked at had been sizable, allowing Chrissy and her mother to move to the very same neighborhood where her father had lost his life. Chrissy thought the decision was a little morbid, but her mother said it made her feel closer to him. She thought it was probably just because her mother liked playing the brokenhearted widow to the other country club women.

So when Chrissy walked into the room late that morning, she nearly missed the announcement. A few seconds after she found her seat and dodged the harsh glare of her teacher, Mr. Finnegan, the tinny speaker clicked to life.

Good morning, Hawkins High. It is with a heavy heart that we announce the passing of one of our own students, Edward Munson. An assembly will be held in the gymnasium at 1 PM. Our thoughts and prayers are with his family and his friends at this time.

“They're wasting their time. Munson is definitely in hell with the other devil worshipers,” one of the basketball players in the back row muttered.

Chrissy turned her head to see Bryce, a second-year senior and overall prick, snickering and exchanging high fives with the other boys in green jerseys.

“Mr. Hartley, to the principal's office. Now,” Mr. Finnegan barked.

Bryce and the teacher stared each other down for what felt like a full minute before the boy stood up, all unearned swagger, and flipped the teacher off before sauntering out of the room. Chrissy shook her head with disdain and pulled out her well-worn copy of Frankenstein. She hung out with the basketball players on occasion, all the cheerleaders did by virtue of being in the same social class at Hawkins. But she tried not to get drawn in too deeply into the ever-cycling drama of who was dating and who cheated on who. She knew that some of the other cheerleaders thought she was stuck-up and snobby, but she honestly preferred to keep to herself most of the time.

Not to mention that most of the guys on the team were complete douchebags. About the only guy she actually considered a friend was Jason Carver, who was as sweet and sincere as a golden retriever with sandy hair to match. She had opened up to him about a lot of things and trusted him to keep her confidence. He never even tried to make a move on her, although he sometimes saw from the way his eyes roved over her legs or he looked a little too long into her eyes that he must feel something for her. The cold reality of her father's death still loomed over her most days, and she wasn't sure when she'd be ready to pursue anything, let alone fall in love. She thumbed to the part of the book where the creature was teaching himself to read when Maryanne, a junior and newest recruit to the cheer team, sidled up to her.

“Hey, Chris?”

“Mm-hm?”

“Have you seen Taylor?”

“I haven't...oh shit.” Chrissy slammed her book down and her hand went over her mouth. “That was her brother, right? The guy that died?”

“Yeah, it was. Fuck, no wonder she didn't return my calls this weekend. How did it happen, you think?”

Chrissy was taken aback at the bluntness of the question, but she couldn't help but be curious herself. She cast her mind to what little knowledge she had of Eddie Munson. She knew that he had been on his third run at senior year because he kept failing calculus, and that he was the school's resident weed dealer. She knew he had lived in the trailer park with his uncle and his little sister Taylor, a fellow cheerleader who was usually seen hiding behind her mop of curly black hair. She had a vague notion that he was something of a troublemaker, although she didn't think they'd ever actually interacted. She had seen him maybe once or twice at the back of the lunch room, consorting with various underclassmen and social outcasts.

Chrissy shrugged and rubbed her thumb along the book's spine. “Maybe he, you know...overdosed.”

“Oh geez, Chrissy.”

“Well, you asked what I thought. I mean, I didn't know the guy but it makes the most sense. It was either that or a car accident. How else does a presumably healthy teenager just up and die?”

“Yeah, I guess you're right. I hope Taylor will be back by next week. We still need to perfect the routine we talked about, and you know how anal Dayna gets. Which is funny, because-”

“Ahh, I'm gonna stop you there, Mary. I don't need to know what the head cheerleader gets up to in her off hours, okay?”

“You're no fun, Cunningham.”

Chrissy threw the girl a facetious smile and flipped her book open, sinking back into her seat.

–

After lunch, Chrissy made her way to the gym to try and find a seat with the other cheerleaders. The mood of the student body was overall jovial and seemed to treat the assembly as a fun distraction from the school day, not a somber contemplation of a nineteen year old's death. She found a seat next to Jason, who smiled and moved his letterman jacket off the bench next to him.

“Saved you a seat,” he said a little shyly. She thought it was kind of endearing how he was so confident on the court but acted like a schoolboy around girls.

“Thanks, Carver,” she replied, lightly punching him on the arm to avoid giving him the wrong impression. The smile he gave her in response was a little pained. Chrissy scanned the crowd and saw a small gaggle of students huddled together solemnly on the far side of the gym, most of them wearing black and white raglan shirts with some kind of red demon on the front. She figured they must have been Eddie's friends and felt a twinge of sympathy for them. Even if he had been kind of a weirdo, he seemed to have had more real friends than she did.

The gray-haired principal made his way to the microphone at the center of the stadium and most of the students quieted down. “Good afternoon, everyone. As you no doubt heard this morning, Edward Munson has unfortunately passed away.”

“His name was Eddie!” someone shouted. Chrissy looked over at the source of the noise and saw a student with curly hair and a baseball cap standing amongst the group of Eddie's friends, looking close to tears. Someone next to him grabbed his arm to pull him down; the other students began to snicker and whisper amongst themselves.

The principal cleared his throat to try and bring some decorum back.

“Excuse me, yes, Eddie. We know that he has left behind many friends and loved ones, including his sister and fellow student Taylor. We understand that some of you may be upset at this news and myself and Ms. Kelley, the counselor, are here if you need support.”

“Yeah, I'm real upset. Can we have the rest of the day to, like, grieve and stuff?” yelled one of the football players.

The principal closed his eyes and sighed, clearly not buying their story. He looked at Ms. Kelley who was seated next to him; she rolled her eyes but still nodded.

“Yes, if that's what you need, you can do so after the assembly. Now, we also wanted to discuss another matter of some importance. Due to an ongoing investigation, we can not release any details of Mr. Munson's passing. However, the police chief has asked me to pass along a message to everyone here. It is imperative that, until more information is gathered about this case, everyone stays in groups and avoids going out after dark, particularly late at night. We know that most of you feel like nothing bad can happen in a community as safe and welcoming as Hawkins, but please, for your own well being, if you must go out, stay together and keep to well-lit and well-populated areas of the town.”

“Is there a curfew?” a female student shouted.

“Not officially at this time, no. The police force of Hawkins is doing everything they can to keep us safe. But you can help them out by making smart decisions for yourself and for your friends.”

A wave of quiet murmurs broke among the gathered students. Chrissy herself was puzzled. She hadn't had to suffer through a stranger danger assembly since grade school, so what did this have to do with Eddie's death?

“Jesus,” Jason muttered. “They make it sound so ominous.”

“Yeah, definitely. I wish they wouldn't be so vague about it, it's just going to make people panic more. My mom certainly won't let me out after dark if she hears about this.”

“I'm sure they're calling up all the parents as we speak.”

Chrissy groaned; after everything that had happened over the last few years, her mother's controlling tendencies had kicked up several notches. It was usually all she could do to leave the house for anything other than school and practice already.

“Well, I'm sure they won't mind if we head out early, it's not like anyone can focus today anyways. You want to grab a milkshake or something before you head home?”

“Ah,” Chrissy tried to think of a good reason why she couldn't and came up short. “I'm on a diet still.”

“That's okay, I'll get you a salad.”

“It's fine, really. I think I need to be with the other girls on the squad today. You know, for Taylor and everything.”

“But Taylor's not here today.”

“Yeah, but you know, we know Taylor and she obviously knew Eddie, and it's...grief by association.”

Jason flicked his eyes to the group of cheerleaders who were comparing nail polish, clearly having gotten over their shock quickly enough. He smiled at Chrissy tightly, and something in his steely blue eyes gave Chrissy an odd feeling in the pit of her stomach.

“Sure, Chris. I'll see you later.” He snatched up his jacket and headed out, a few other basketball players following behind him like ducklings.

She felt a little guilty as he left; she was sure the other girls would say she was 'leading him on' or something. But was it really that bad to be friends with a guy and not feel obligated to be his girlfriend? Sure, she could do worse than the captain of the basketball team, and he had been a good friend to her, but something felt off about him sometimes. Chrissy gathered up her stuff and headed back to class, figuring there was no sense in wasting a perfectly good school day.

–

When Chrissy pulled into her usual spot at the palatial home she shared with her mother, she found herself hoping she was out having a spa day or organizing some kind of fundraiser; anything to keep her out of the house for a little while. She knew she'd have to field a million questions she didn't know the answer to and make promises about staying extra-super-safe, even though Hawkins was about as quaint and cozy a town as one could find these days, particularly with the neighborhood they lived in. She honestly couldn't imagine any danger coming into her life unless she sought it out for herself. It was all well and good to mourn the guy, sure; he was still so young and clearly had a lot of close friends in his life. But she had a feeling he'd done something to contribute to his own demise, the strange warning at the assembly notwithstanding. This whole thing was probably just the local cops trying to wield what little authority they held amongst the teenage population by stoking some fear.

Chrissy's wish for some solitude and a chance to unwind was dashed when she opened the door and her mother, Laura, nearly flew at her, holding her in a tight vice grip.

“Oh, Chrissy, I'm so glad the school called before I left for the day. Are you alright, darling? Did you know the boy who died? Did they say what happened?”

She squeezed her eyes shut tightly to avoid rolling them and pried herself away. “Hi, mom. I promise, there's nothing to worry about. I'm fine, see? Got all my limbs and everything.” She did a twirl to show her mother she was still intact.

“Dear, this is nothing to joke about. This boy died.”

Chrissy nodded and made her way to the kitchen. “Yup, but I didn't really know him. He was kind of a weird guy, you know?”

“Weird? In what way?”

“I don't know, like he played that board game, dungeons and demons or something. And he had a little group of freshman that followed him around everywhere.”

“Demons? Was he one of those...” her mother gestured vaguely into the air. Chrissy knew what her mother was referring to, as she'd had to hear all about the apparently rampant Satan-worshipping, baby-stealing, human-sacrificing, blood-drinking cult that was sweeping the nation. She didn't put much stock into it, thinking it was just another way magazines sold copies these days. If there were really that many people being ritually murdered, she figured there would be some actual proof behind it and not just vague fear mongering. Her mother, however, would hear none of it; she'd insisted they attend church three times a week instead of two once she'd heard about it.

“Oh gosh, I don't know, mom. Like I said, I only knew about him because his sister is on our cheer squad, and she's not like, little miss talkative. And even though Hawkins is super safe, I will be extra careful in case the boogeyman comes out, okay?”

Laura gave her a stern look as Chrissy rummaged through the fridge, pulling out the fixings for a sandwich. “Honestly, Christine, sometimes I feel like you're just humoring me when you say things like that.”

Chrissy bit her lip and tried not to feel guilty. Although Laura kept herself busy most of the time, she knew her father's death still weighed heavily on her. Chrissy gave her mother an awkward side hug. “I promise, for real. No unnecessary risks for this girl. It's not like I do anything besides go to school and read anyways.”

Laura smiled sternly at her, satisfied for the moment. “All right, dear. And if you need me to pick you up and drop you off instead of you driving-”

“No, mom.”

–

After doing her homework and powering through the rest of Frankenstein, Chrissy cracked open her well-worn copy of the The Fellowship of the Ring. She'd been meaning to re-read it; the December chill in the air always made her want to curl up and visit the Shire. She couldn't really shake the odd feeling that the day's events had given her and wasn't sure why; logically, perhaps a little callously, she had already moved on. She figured if she was meant to be sad for every person's death, she would never stop being sad since people died every day. It was a bit of an odd mentality, she knew, but it had helped her get through the slow agony of her father's passing and move onto some semblance of normalcy.

Still, she felt in her gut that there was something about the situation she had missed or something that subtly but firmly demanded her attention. Maybe it was just the fact that they hadn't released the cause of death yet, although maybe it never would be out of respect to the family. She tried to forget it and focus on the words on the page; the familiar and comforting story and warmth of the blankets piled onto her made it easy to slip into a drowsy state. She was just about to let her eyes slip closed when she jumped, startled, feeling suddenly but unmistakably like she was being watched by something close by. She whipped her head around and saw nothing except the soft glow of her bedside lamp; her bedroom door was closed and her mother had gone to bed an hour ago.

The fine hair on her forearms stood up despite the clear fact that nothing else was in the room with her. Chrissy breathed in deeply and tried to get back to her relaxed state; it had probably been one of those times when your body jolts awake just as you're falling asleep. She knew from one of her many non-fiction reads that these occurred when your heart rate slows too quickly and your body thinks you're dying so it startles you awake. It was not a particularly comforting thought at that moment. She shook her head and noticed the book, still in her hands, was turned to page 42. She remembered that she'd only been on page 23 a minute ago; obviously the book had been shuffled a little in the chaos of her jerking awake. Nonetheless, it still gave her a strange feeling. She flipped back to the page she'd been on and firmly, almost defiantly, pressed the corner of the page down to mark it.

Chrissy slipped the book into her drawer and turned the light off, feeling silly for being so scared of nothing. Maybe it was a subconscious thing, like her therapist had told her about shortly after her father passed. You can ignore certain things and even convince yourself everything is fine, but the subconscious mind had a way of pushing them to the light unless they were resolved. No, that's dumb, Chrissy thought as she turned onto her side and nestled into her duvet. Why should I care about some guy I don't know dying?

–

The moonlight reflected across the carpet in Chrissy's room, broken up the movement of an oak tree in the wind. Outside, an owl preened itself as it readied for its nightly mouse hunt. Chrissy slept soundly, all thoughts of Eddie and his mysterious demise forgotten. Suddenly and without warning, her clock radio came to life, blaring as loud as the volume would go.

All the leaves are brown

And the sky is gray

I've been for a walk

On a winter's day

Chrissy gasped awake, nearly falling out of bed as she found herself tangled up in her comforter. Shoving it aside, she clicked the lamp on and saw that it was nearly midnight, 11:47 PM to be precise. She turned the volume on the radio way down, hoping it hadn't already woken her mother. She waited for a minute or two, holding her breath; thankfully Laura seemed to have slept through the sudden noise. Chrissy took a deep breath in and blew it slowly out, regarding the clock radio with distrust. The guy with the stupid Tom Selleck mustache at Radioshack had told her it was brand-new and top of the line, but clearly something was amiss if it came on at random times with the volume on full blast. She hadn't even set any alarm on it, usually waking up naturally a little after dawn, and if she had done so it certainly wouldn't be for the middle of the night.

She realized the song was still playing; scoffing, she reached around to unplug the radio, leaving a vacuum of silence where the noise had been. With how odd the day had been, Chrissy didn't feel quite ready to turn off the lamp, so she simply turned and covered herself fully, willing herself to go back to sleep. Although any tiredness had fled her body at the shock of the radio, she found comfort in the softness of her duvet and nestled deeper into the plush material. After a few minutes, however, her blood ran ice-cold as she heard another song start playing, quieter this time.

Winter is here again, oh lord

Haven't been home in a year or more

I hope she holds on a little longer

Sent a letter on a long summer day

Her hand curled around the hem of her shirt uselessly, wishing she had a knife or at least something to bang an intruder over the head with. Whoever was in here with her must have been hiding in her closet; she couldn't believe that after all her talk of not being worried, she was about to fall prey to some kind of monster. Was it the same person who had killed Eddie? Maybe if the principal had said Hey guys there's a serial killer on the loose she would have been a little more cautious.

Slowly, she created a gap in the comforter so she could see what she was dealing with. Maybe her mother was pulling a prank to show her she needed to be careful? It was extremely unlikely, knowing her, but she felt the need to grasp at straws just the same. Instead of a masked, hulking intruder wielding a machete, she saw a boy about her age, wearing a leather jacket and bobbing his head along to the Journey song. Something in his face was familiar, although she couldn't place...

And then it came to her.

His hair. Long, curly, dark. Like Taylor's. Was this...?

“Eddie?” she asked aloud.

The boy whipped around and saw the barest peek of a girl's face through the covers. He looked at her warily, dipping his head down to try and meet her eyes.

“Uh, yeah, actually. Do you know me? I mean, do I know you? Everything's a little fuzzy since...”

Chrissy came out from her duvet cocoon and sat up, looking him square in the face. “Holy shit. I thought you were...they said you were-”

“Dead?” he grinned at her cheekily, bouncing a little on his heels. For someone who'd recently lost his life, he seemed to have a lot of nervous energy. “Yeah, I, uh, guess I'm not as dead as everyone thought. I mean, I am dead. But I'm still...here? Like, kind of. So I guess that makes me-”

“A ghost? Holy fucking shit, Eddie Munson's ghost is in my room.”

“You got a mouth on you, sailor,” he said, looking at her appreciatively. It made her feel a little funny, which is not how she expected to feel with an actual, real-live ghost in her room.

“Ok, um, I have a lot of questions. How are you here, in my room, and also why? How did you die? Can you walk through walls? Or are you a poltergeist, like in that movie? Also, how did you plug in my radio? I thought ghosts were incorporeal. And how do I know this isn't a dream?”

Eddie gave a low whistle and slid his hands into his pockets. “Hang on a minute. I'm pretty new to this whole thing, so bear with me. How about I tell you what I know and we'll go from there, yeah? First, I've got a couple questions.”

“Oh yeah, sorry.”

“How did you know who I was?”

“You, uh, look a lot like your sister. She's on the cheer squad with us.”

“Oh god, Taylor. How's she holding up?”

“I'm not sure, sorry. She wasn't in school today, but I assume not great.” She suddenly felt a wave of guilt that she hadn't even thought to check on the girl; for all she knew, no one else had either. Thankfully, Eddie didn't press her on it too hard.

“Today, so...what's today?”

“Monday. The 7th of December.”

“Ok, so it's only been two days since it happened. Funny, it feels like a lot of time has passed. And, um, sorry, what was your name? Still working on my ghost manners.”

“It's Christine, but everyone calls me Chrissy.”

“Chrissy. I like it.” He looked at her then, dark brown eyes boring through hers, making her feel a strange sense of awe. Some part of her, which was mostly tucked away just then, tried to ask why she wasn't scared, tried to say this must be a really vivid dream, but she didn't really want to listen to that part.

“Ok, so why don't you tell me what you know, or what you remember, and we'll figure this thing out.”

“Alright,” Eddie said, clapping his hands together and pacing around the room. “So, I remember bits and pieces of the last couple of days, although there are definitely some weird gaps in my memory. I remember my life before then, like my friends and hobbies and shit. And I remember waking up, if you can call it that, here in your room a few hours ago.”

“God, you've been here for hours? Were you here when I was...getting changed?” She felt her face heat up and diverted her eyes.

“No, no...I mean, I was, but I didn't look, promise. I simply perused your massive collection of books and picked out a few good ones. The Princess Bride, for instance. Great taste, I must say.”

Chrissy sighed, relieved. “Ok, so why am I only now seeing you, and why did you wake up here and not, like, anywhere else? I don't think we've ever even met.”

“Um, not sure about the second question. I didn't do anything to come here, specifically. As far as the other one, I actually have spent the last few hours trying to...I guess you'd call it manifesting?”

“Manifesting?”

“Yeah, like, I was here, but I couldn't touch anything. I tried for a while, and got frustrated, then I gave up and started reading with you.”

“Oh my god, did you turn my pages?”

Eddie chuckled. “Yeah, you know, you were falling asleep, and I wanted to keep reading, because what the hell else is there to do when you're a fucking ghost? Sorry if I scared you.”

“What really scared me was when you turned on the radio.”

“Oh yeah, that. Well, like I said, not much for me to do, and I assume ghosts don't sleep, so I spent a little while trying to turn on the radio so I could at least listen to music. Quietly, or at least that was the idea. I'm still getting used to all this, so I might have put in a little too much energy and turned the volume way up. My bad.”

Chrissy shook her head. “It's fine, I'm with you so far. So it took you some time to figure out how to touch things. How did we go from that to me seeing you here?”

Eddie gave a little shrug. “Once I was able to channel my...ghost vibes, or ectoplasm, or whatever-”

“Please don't say ectoplasm.”

“Okay, my spiritual energy, into moving or touching things, then I could just move that energy outwards until I was visible. It's still taking some energy to maintain this form, but the more I do it, the easier it gets, so I hope you don't mind. And also sorry about being in your room, and being here when you changed, and just...the whole thing. Ask anyone, I'm usually much more of a gentleman, but, you know, circumstances being what they are...”

“Don't worry about it. Also, I don't think I've said this yet, but I'm sorry you died. That really sucks.”

“Yeah, well, I'm here now. For what it's worth.”

“You really don't remember how it happened?”

“I...remember some things, like I said. If I try and concentrate I feel like more will come back to me, but I don't want to push it too much. This whole thing feels kind of tenuous, and I don't want to go just yet. I need to see my friends, and Taylor, and my uncle, and hopefully in a way that they can see me. I need to...say goodbye.” Eddie sat on the edge of Chrissy's bed, rubbing his hands on his knees nervously in what she assumed was an old habit.

“It's fine, Eddie. Take all the time you need. Now that I know you're not going to like, possess me or knock all my stuff off the shelves you can stay here as long as you want. Just, um, maybe look away if I get undressed, yeah?”

Eddie huffed a laugh. “Yeah, you got it. Thanks, Chrissy. I'm...I know we never met, but I'm actually really glad I landed here and not one of the douchey football player's rooms. They'd probably find a way to kick my ass from beyond the grave.”

Chrissy laughed. “If it's okay with you, I'm going to try and sleep. Still have school and stuff in the morning. Do you, um...you said ghosts didn't need to sleep, right?”

“I mean, I assume so but I haven't actually tried it. I'll just chill in that cozy-looking beanbag over there and see what happens. You gonna be okay?”

“Sure, why wouldn't I be?”

Eddie shrugged. “I get the feeling people don't check on you very often.”

Chrissy wasn't sure what to say to that, so she simply nestled onto her pillow and sighed. “Hey, Eddie?”

“Yeah?”

“Can you...just make sure you don't, like, go into the light or whatever. I want to help you out here, so if I wake up and you've moved onto the next astral plane, I'll be really mad.”

Eddie smiled warmly at her and squeezed her ankle briefly; the cool force of his touch felt a little electric. “I'll do my best, your highness.”

–

When Chrissy woke up later than normal, she found the bedroom to be colder than she expected. She glanced over at the ratty beanbag which hadn't had much use over the last few years (although she'd pitched a fit when her mom tried to throw it away) and saw Eddie with his head leaning on his shoulder. He looked much more translucent than he had the previous night, which made Chrissy's anxiety spike suddenly.

“Eddie! Eddie, wake up!”

The boy woke with a start and glanced at Chrissy, looking a little perturbed.

“Morning, sunshine. Everything cool?”

“You're all...clear. Like you're fading away or something.” Chrissy was surprised and a little embarrassed at the emotion she heard in her voice.

Eddie held up his hands and cocked his head curiously. “Oh, got it. Give me a second.” He closed his eyes and seemed to be concentrating on something. Chrissy watched him intently, and before she knew it, he began to look much more solid, like a Polaroid picture becoming clearer as it develops. He took a deep breath and smiled at her kindly. “Better?”

Chrissy nodded, swallowing hard to clear up a sudden lump in her throat.

“Yeah, sorry to wake you. I just didn't want you to accidentally disappear when you still have unfinished business.”

“I'm not sure how I know this, but I get the feeling it doesn't work that way. I think I have a little bit of control over what happens to me. Which is certainly more than I can say for my life before all this.”

Chrissy frowned sympathetically, earning a smile from Eddie. “Relax, just a little gallows humor.”

“You know, for someone who's dead you seem to be coping pretty well with all this.”

“I know, right? Maybe I'm still in the denial stage. Then comes anger and bargaining-”

“And depression and acceptance.”

Eddie gave her a scrutinizing look. “Spoken like someone who's read a lot of pamphlets.”

“Mm-hm.” Chrissy started to gather up her hair to tie into a ponytail. “You mean ones with big titles like 'Weathering the Storm of Grief' or 'How to Find the Silver Lining in the Clouds of Life'.”

“It's always about rain and clouds with those people, isn't it? You know, when my dad died, the first thing the funeral director said to me was 'You can't have a rainbow without a little rain.' Like, hey man, my dad just overdosed and I'm nine years old and can't stop picturing his face. Maybe read the room, you know?”

Chrissy felt the blood drain from her face and knew she must have gone pale. “Jesus, Eddie.”

“Sorry, that...I haven't really talked about that with anyone in a long time. I could always tell when he was on something because he would walk around all scratched and bruised from bumping into shit. And he would start slurring his words a lot. Taylor always thought he was just a drunk, and I didn't have the heart to tell her otherwise. And he would always get this look on his face, like he didn't even know who I was. I just kept thinking about him being buried like that, with that same lost look for eternity. At least until the bugs got him. We couldn't afford the really good, steel coffin so I assume they got in there eventually.”

Chrissy almost laughed; her mother had actually sprung for the best coffin in the funeral home for her father, as if it would make any difference. She'd thought it was the most absurd thing; he was already dead, and it wasn't like spending more money to keep him away from the elements was going to do anything for him.

What about you?”

“Hm?”

“Did you...lose someone?”

“Yeah, my dad, a while ago. It was an accident at work, he, um, fell and broke his neck.”

“Fuck, that's rough. I'm sorry, Chrissy.” He went silent for a minute, watching the birds puff themselves up and sing their hearts out. “It's weird, you know. Me showing up here. I think you're the only other person in town who's lost their father.”

“No, there's...actually, yeah, now that you mention it. It kind of sucks being the only one. Obviously I don't want anyone to lose a parent, but it's like no one else knows how much it changes everything. How you see the world differently, how everyone else's problems seem so-”

“Small?”

Chrissy nodded. “Do you think we would have been friends if you hadn't died?”

“Hmm.” Eddie pursed his lips and squatted down, the rips in his ghostly jeans showing pale strips of flesh. She found her eyes drawn to them, wondering if he'd bought them that way or systematically cut the fabric with a pocket knife for aesthetic purposes. “I think...given our proclivity for running in certain social circles, that we would have been two lonely ships passing in the night, never knowing each other's hidden depths but feeling a certain magnetic pull nonetheless.”

“I think you overestimate my 'social circle'. I'm literally only in cheer so I can get out of the house, and so my mom doesn't nag me about being depressed. I'd honestly rather stay in and read most of the time.”

“Really? No other passions ignite the heart of the innocent cheerleader?”

“Passions, huh? You mean dating?”

“I mean whatever you mean.”

“Well...” Chrissy blushed a little and pulled a small notebook out of her bedside drawer. In it, Eddie saw a configuration of lines and dots with words written in small, cramped writing.

“What's Delphinus?”

“It's a constellation. There are 87 other officially recognized constellations, and they help people find other stars that may not be as bright. It's called star hopping. So, you go out at night with some decent binoculars, and you find a constellation, right? Then you look at a star hopping chart, and use that constellation as a guide to find another star that's a certain angle or distance away. It's kind of like bird watching, if small birds were always accompanied by a much bigger bird.”

“Or like when Prince opened for the Stones in LA a few years ago. Although I heard that didn't go very well.”

Chrissy giggled. “Yeah, something like that. Sometimes I feel like one of those little pale stars. Like when I do a cheer routine with the other girls at a big game, and no one would even think to look at me if I wasn't surrounded by a bunch of fun, popular, pretty people. I kind of like the idea of going out of my way to acknowledge the stars that everyone forgets about.”

“There are an awful lot of stars up there, you know. Gonna take you a while.”

“Yeah, well, what else is there to do in Hawkins?”

“Good point.”

“Oh, damn, it's already 7:40. I need to get going if I'm going to be at school on time.”

“No worries, I'll be here. I'm not too keen to try going outside without you there.”

“Me?” Chrissy was taken aback.

“Yeah, I mean...I know it's weird to say since I'm already dead, but I feel a lot more secure knowing you're here and you can see and hear me. I mean, I showed up in your room for some cosmic and mysterious reason, so we must be linked in some way. Maybe we were past-life lovers or something.”

She blushed and bit back a sudden smile. “You believe in all that reincarnation stuff?”

“Well, given the circumstances...” he gestured vaguely to himself. “I'd say I don't know what I fucking believe anymore. Except that I really do need you, Chrissy. You're my last link to the world, to my friends, to every good and bad thing I ever did.”

His dark eyes pierced through hers and she felt a rush of protectiveness for Eddie. She had spent most of her life feeling like an accessory to her family and friends, putting on a pretty show but always feeling a little disconnected from everyone, especially since her father's death. But Eddie had no one else to turn to, had no idea why he was even still on earth in some form. She strode two steps forward and took his calloused hand in hers; it felt almost weightless under her grip.

“I promise, Eddie. You just work on not disappearing and I'll do everything I can for you. Maybe we can even figure out how you died.”

“One thing at a time, princess.”

Chrissy scoffed. “Just stay out of trouble, farm boy.”

“As you wish.” He threw her a wink as she turned to leave.

--

Chrissy's leg jiggled impatiently as she half-listened to that day's history lecture; she glanced at the yellowed wall clock for the hundredth time that day, willing it to move faster. She's gotten to school with a new sense of purpose, hoping if she started asking around about Eddie and getting to know his friends, she could find out more about what had brought the boy to his early end. The rest of the school body had moved on from the news of Eddie's death quickly enough, sharing the latest gossip about who Madonna was dating at the moment. She noticed that Taylor still wasn't in class and felt awful that she hadn't even thought to check on the girl, preferring to bury her nose in a book and shrug her shoulders at the whole ordeal. When had she gotten so callous about other people's lives?

At last, the bell rang and she made her way to the lunchroom; she grabbed an apple just to have something to hold onto. Chrissy felt oddly nervous about what she was about to do and kind of hoped no one at her usual spot would notice she wasn't there. She made her way to the table at the back of the lunch room where Eddie's friend group sat, still looking pale and solemn. Their chairs were pushed close to each other as they picked at the cheap school lunch, like they were afraid they would lose another member if they didn't keep a watchful eye out. As she approached, a boy with pointed features and longish hair eyed her with suspicion.

“Um, hi, I'm sorry to bother you guys. I was wondering if I could sit for a minute. I, um...I'm friends with Taylor, you know, on the cheer squad, and she hasn't been to school. Is she doing ok?”

“If you're friends, why don't you go to her house and ask her how she's doing?,” the boy said, crossing his arms over his chest.

“I...we're not, like, super close, and I didn't want to pry with everything going on. I was just concerned. My name's Chrissy, by the way. Chrissy Cunningham.”

The boy's face softened slightly. “Oh yeah, I know you. My sister said you were cool. You know, Nancy Wheeler?”

Chrissy remembered Nancy from the girl's brief but overall disastrous attempt to join the cheerleading squad in her freshman year. She had sprained an ankle trying a complete a back handspring in her tryout and nearly burst into tears. The other girls had snickered at her, but for some reason Chrissy had felt bad for the girl and helped her hobble to the nurses office. After that, she had gained a reputation for fierce intelligence and resilience, and she couldn't help admire the girl's dramatic transformation from afar.

“Yeah, of course. Does that make you her younger brother? I'm sorry, I don't-”

“It's Mike Wheeler.” He cocked his head to the boy next to him, who was wearing a gaudy shirt and tricolor cap. “This is Dustin.”

Dustin waved halfheartedly but didn't meet Chrissy's eyes. “Greetings, popular one. You know, I'm surprised you didn't burst into flames on your way over here.”

“Dude, be cool,” Mike said. “Sorry, we're all a little bit...”

“It's fine, I can't imagine how hard it's been for you guys.” She slid cautiously into a chair and set her apple down, noticing the table wobble with the slight weight. “I guess I also wanted to see how you all were doing. I mean, it kind of feels like everyone else...it's weird, but they don't seem to-”

“Give a shit?” A boy wearing a plaid vest and sullen face spoke up. “Yeah, don't think we didn't notice no one else in this school could muster up anything even resembling sympathy. The only people who have even talked to us directly are the fucking cops.”

“Really? Do you mind if I ask what they wanted? That whole thing at the assembly, about staying inside after dark kind of freaked me out, honestly.”

“They talked to all of us,” Mike said with disdain. “They refused to say anything about what happened, but they asked us a thousand questions. When was the last time you saw Eddie? What kind of mood was he in, what kind of car did he drive? Did he have any enemies or ties to illegal shit? And yeah, so what if he sold fucking pot? People in this town are such hypocrites. He wouldn't have been selling if all the nice, Christian kids weren't buying. No offense.”

“No worries. Do you guys have any theories on what happened?”

“Sorry, but why should we tell you?” Dustin piped up. “I thought you were worried about Taylor. What are you, like a student journalist or something?”

“No! I'm...I'm sorry, I'm not very good with this stuff. I guess I feel bad that I never got to know him while I had the chance. He seemed like a really good guy.”

“Did you have a crush on him or something?” the boy in the plaid vest asked slyly.

Chrissy laughed, burying her face in her hands.

“Go easy on her, guys.” Mike said, leaning forward. “Look, you don't have to be all coy. If you want to know what Eddie was like, we'll all tell you. Eddie was... you wouldn't know it from his GPA, but he was really smart. He could write the most intense D&D session that would have you on the edge of your seat for weeks. Even when we went way off book, he could improvise like he was Tolkien. He wrote Lord of-”

“Yeah, I know who Tolkien is.”

“Ok, name three elf characters.”

“Really? You're going to test my knowledge?”

Mike cocked an eyebrow at her and she rolled her eyes. “Legolas, Galadriel and and Arwen.”

“Not bad,” Dustin muttered. “But if you want to impress the ladies, Mike, don't talk about D&D. Talk about how Eddie could shred guitar like he was in Van Halen or something.”

“Oh yeah, totally. Like, he could listen to a song on the radio once, maybe twice, and within a week he'd be able to play it himself. Dude was a savant. He...always talked about how he wanted to play Madison Square Garden.”

“A couple of us were in a band together. We played at this divey kind of place, up on Hillcrest, called The Hideout,” the boy in the vest said, looking wistful.

“I wish I'd gotten a chance to see you guys. Do you think you'll play again?”

He shrugged, rubbing his thumb against the edge of the table. “It wouldn't really be the same.”

“Neither would D&D,” Dustin said, voice trembling.

Chrissy had to blink back tears looking at the boys; it was clear the heart had been unceremoniously ripped out of the group. She couldn't even feel that angry at the other students for acting so uncaring; if Eddie hadn't manifested in her bedroom, she'd still be one of them.

“I'm really sorry, you guys. I wish there was something I could do.”

Mike shook his head and cleared his throat. “It's cool, Chrissy. It's nice to talk about him like this. Feels a little bit like he's still here, as long as we remember how badass and brave and fun he was.”

“You die a second time when someone says your name for the last time. When my dad died, that was one of the only things that actually made me feel better about it all.”

“I'm sorry, I didn't know. What was your dad's name?”

“Thomas.”

Mike smiled and raised his chocolate milk in a toast. “To Thomas.”

Chrissy smiled back and raised her apple. “To Eddie.”

As she made her way out of the lunch room to find solace alone, she realized she would have to pass by her usual seat where the cheerleaders and basketball players congregated. She couldn't help but notice that Jason and a few of his most loyal lackeys weren't in their usual spots.

“Heyy, Chrissy!” called out one of the boys in a grating, almost taunting way. It was Devon Murphy, another jerk who had a reputation for getting girls too drunk at parties.

She forced a tight smile as she slid past the table, hoping to extricate herself as quickly as possible.

“Hey, Devon, sorry I don't feel very good, I-”

“What in the hell are you doing hanging out with those little weirdos?” the boy asked, ignoring her discomfort and putting her on the spot. “Don't tell me you give a shit about the freaks all of a sudden.”

“Yeah, Chris, since when do you care about anything besides sticking your nose in books?” sneered a senior girl named Jessica.

“I...I care about a lot of things. Just because I keep to myself sometimes doesn't mean-”

“Yeah, okay. You know, Jason told everyone about how you blew him off yesterday. He was pretty pissed about it but said he'd give you another chance. You know, once you stop hanging out with losers and get your priorities straight.”

“My priorities? Sorry, since when do I owe him anything? I thought he and I were friends.”

“Please, Chrissy, don't be such an idiot. Most of the girls on the team would do anything to be with him. He's been trying to get with you for months, and all you do is find reasons to say no.”

“Maybe because I don't like him like that! And for your information, those freaks and I have a lot more in common than any of you do. I lost someone too, and I just wanted to check in on them since no one else seems to have given them a second thought.”

“Yeah, but like, you wouldn't be living in that huge house if your dad hadn't died, right? Maybe you should count yourself lucky.”

Before she could stop herself, Chrissy balled her hand into a fist and hit the wood table hard enough to make everyone sitting there jump. The lunchroom quieted as the other tables turned to see what the commotion was. Jessica looked at her with an almost frightened expression. Chrissy made eye contact with the girl and couldn't remember ever feeling so much hate.

“Maybe you should 'count yourself lucky' I hit the table and not your fucking face,” she spat. Jessica opened and closed her mouth like a fish before looking like she was about to cry. “I'm sorry, Chris-”

“Save it.” She swung her bag over her shoulder forcefully and half-ran out of the room, then down the hall and out the front door. Thankfully no teachers or hall monitors were present to stop her, though if she had encountered anyone she would have gone right past them, possible suspensions be damned.

–

It took all of Chrissy's concentration to drive the short distance home safely. Once she made it inside and saw her mother was out, she went to her bedroom to check on Eddie. She found him curled up on his side on her bed, long hair splayed out on her pillow, looking considerably more solid than he had that morning. Chrissy let her bag drop to the ground and sat on the edge of the bed, burying her face in her hands. After a minute of trying to choke back sobs, she felt a hand, soft as a feather, on her shoulder.

“Hey,” he said sleepily. “You okay?”

“Oh yeah. I'm great,” she mumbled, trying to concentrate on the feel of his palm, which had begun ever so gently kneading her shoulder blade.

His other arm slipped slowly around her waist, pulling her closer. “Is this okay?”

She sighed a little dreamily. “Yeah, actually.”

Eddie adjusted himself to make room for her, and she lay down, letting him shuffle close until they were almost spooning.

“You know, my mom would flip shit if she knew I was doing this with a boy.”

He chuckled, running his fingers through her long hair. The coolness of his fingertips felt almost like rushing water on her scalp, and she let herself get lost in the feeling.

“Well, one benefit of having a ghost boy in your room is that I can't get you pregnant. Probably. Although, did you see that one scene in Ghostbusters? With Dan Aykroyd getting-”

“Ughh, stop!” she squealed, wriggling away and laughing.

“Sorry,” he said, grinning. “I didn't mean to ruin a nice moment. I mean, it was nice for me. I don't know if it was for you, but you seemed to need...I mean-”

“It was nice,” she said, turning back towards him and sliding their fingers together. “It still is. Maybe this is really selfish of me, but I'm glad you're here. I always seem to push people away or make them hate me. It's probably my fault, but it feels like I don't have anyone who likes me, or even knows me.”

“I don't believe that,” he said softly. “Who could ever hate you? You know, maybe it's because you're one of the few cool people in a town full of assholes that you feel so alone. You just haven't found where you belong yet.”

Chrissy smiled sadly. “That's what my dad used to say. He was the only person who took the time to know me.” She squeezed his hand and shivered at the feeling of his hair on the back of her neck. “I really wish I'd spent time with you, Eddie. God, I'm such a self-absorbed idiot. If I hadn't been so busy feeling sorry for myself, I could have...we could have...”

“Chris, it's okay. I wasn't exactly in the habit of crossing the social barrier myself.”

“Yeah, only because my asshole friends would make fun of you if you did. They made me feel like shit today, and I came running home because I couldn't handle it. I can't imagine what years of that would do to someone. I completely understand why you guys kept to yourselves. And I was part of it.”

“Stop, no you weren't. You never said a word against any of us.”

“Yeah, but I didn't stand up for you and your friends, either. I never stopped to question why it was okay for everyone to treat you like that. I just spent all this time convincing myself that it wasn't worth bothering myself over.”

“Yeah, well, as the de facto leader of the long-suffering freaks, I officially forgive you. I mean, we're just a bunch of dumb kids figuring ourselves out in the end, right? Not everyone can be the lone hero standing up for what's right.”

She turned herself to face him, smiling sadly.

“Eddie...ever since my dad died, I've felt so lost, like I don't know who I am or what it is I'm supposed to be doing. All my expensive therapists said I was coping so well, that I was getting on with my daily life and that he'd be proud of me. But honestly, I didn't know what else to do besides carry on like everything was fine. He was my best friend, you know? What are you supposed to do when something like that happens? I just figured that it was best to keep my head down and disengage until I figured it out. But there's nothing to figure out, really. He's gone...and you're...I mean you're here, but...god, I'm so stupid.”

“Stop. Please. No one's guaranteed any amount of time, it just depends on what we do with it.”

“I know. It just feels like I'm seeing the people around me for the first time. The ones I thought were my friends are apparently huge assholes-”

“Could have told you that.”

She shoved him lightly and was pleased to feel solid skin beneath her palm. He smiled in a lazy, boyish way that made her insides twist a little. She found herself unconsciously inching closer to close the small gap between them. She could almost smell him faintly; it reminded her of the smell of the damp earth after a rainstorm, though she wondered if she was just imagining it. His fingers tapped a rhythm on her bare arm, and she felt a blush creep into her cheeks.

“You know, your friends told me you were quite the guitar player.”

“You talked to the guys? How are they doing?”

“They're...okay. I mean, as okay as they can be. I feel like they're going to miss you for a long time. You really made an impact on those kids.”

“Man, I miss them already. They tell you about the band? Are they still going to play? If they do, don't let them change the name. Gareth always wanted it to be something 'appealing' but I held fast on Corroded Coffin.”

“Corroded...oh my god. Holy shit, I saw you play.”

“Really? At the Hideout?”

“No, the tenth grade talent show, remember? You had this buzz cut and the principal had to drag you off stage-”

“Right, because I started acting out both parts of 'Paradise by the Dashboard Lights'. But I mean, that's the kind of song where you really have to commit, you know? Not my fault the dude was still into Buddy Holly.”

Chrissy laughed, wondering how she could have forgotten the uproar the scene had caused. She'd written Eddie off as one of the weird kids without a second thought; knowing him now, she saw he was funny and talented and daring. Her heart ached again for what they could have had, though she wasn't sure if he'd even be into her if she had bothered to approach him.

“You good?” he asked, fiddling with the edge of her skirt.

“Mm-hm. Just thinking.”

“About how handsome I am?”

“Something like that.”

“Oh.” He looked taken aback but pleased, and Chrissy thought she saw a slight blush on his high cheekbones. A smile crept onto his face, and she decided to be brave for once in her life.

“Do you think-”

“Chrissy, are you here?”

“Fuck, my mom's back.” Her head whipped around to look for a good hiding spot for Eddie, but her mother's heavy tread came up the stairs before she could locate anything. She thought about telling Eddie to dive under the bed or even cover himself with her duvet, but it was too late.

“Hello, dear,” her mother said as she swung Chrissy's door open. “I wanted to get your opinion on something.”

“O-oh. Uh, sure mom.”

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Eddie sitting stock still, perhaps hoping that if he didn't move Laura wouldn't spot him. She bit her lip to keep from laughing at the absurd situation. Her mother held up two near-identical blue dresses.

“Do you think the silk or the satin would be most appropriate for Friday's charity gala?”

“Oh gosh, um...which is which again?”

Laura scoffed and held up the one in her right hand. “I think this one is best. It brings out my eyes, you know. How was your day at school?”

“It was fine, they sent us home early-” Chrissy jumped as Eddie clapped his hands hard next to her ear. “Jesus, Ed-” She stopped short and looked at her mother anxiously.

“Chrissy, please. What on earth was that?”

“Oh, sorry mom. I thought I saw a bug on the mattress but it was just a piece of lint.”

“Well, I keep telling you to dust in here. If you don't want to, I can always hire a cleaner-”

“It's fine, mom, I'll clean up later. I just need to catch up on homework first. That dress will look great, I promise.”

“Alright, I'll let you get to it. I'll get dinner started in a bit.”

Chrissy smiled as her mother closed the bedroom door; once she was gone, she let out a long exhale.

“What the hell was that? You're lucky she didn't see you-”

“I'm sorry, Chris, but I had to test it out. Why didn't she see or hear me?” He jumped up and began pacing anxiously around the room. “I mean, are you the only one who can? What about my family? I need to see them. God, how long have I been here?”

“Relax, Eddie, it hasn't even been a day-”

“Yeah, and what if I was only given one day to get my shit together and say goodbye, and I've wasted it sitting here talking to you!”

Chrissy felt her chest constrict and blinked hard to keep tears from forming. “I thought you said you knew how it worked, that you had some control-”

“Yeah, well, maybe that's just wishful thinking on my part. I mean, who fucking knows? I need to go now, I need to see Taylor before it's too late.”

“And what if she can't see you? What if it really is just me?”

“Then let me tell you, of all the cruel jokes this life has played on me, that might be the cruelest of all. I can't talk to my family or my friends, but I get stuck with some cheerleader I hardly know? Fuck, maybe this is my punishment for selling weed and playing devil music for half my life.”

Chrissy sniffled, unable to keep herself from tearing up. “Yeah, didn't I tell you? I'm a fucking demon in disguise.”

“Oh, grow up, Chrissy. Not everything is about you and your inability to cope with anything. If you haven't noticed, I'm fucking dead, so don't start feeling sorry for yourself, because no matter how bad your life is, I'm worse off.”

“I didn't realize it was a competition.”

“I...don't have time for this. I'm just going to go, and if they really can't see me, then at least I'll fade away with them by my side.”

“I thought we were going to figure this out together, Eddie. I thought you needed me.”

Eddie gave her one last pained look before crossing the threshold of her bedroom. “You weren't there for me when I was alive. Why the hell would I need you now?”

The door clicked shut behind him, the sound echoing in Chrissy's mind long after he'd left.

–

After a long and fitful night's sleep, Chrissy awoke the next day hugging a pillow to her chest. It was something she hadn't done for a long time, not since the first days where she'd worked through the pain of losing her father. She pressed it to her face and felt tears well up as it still had the faintest hint of petrichor from where Eddie had laid his head. His harsh final words played over in her head, making her stomach twist into knots. She knew she'd been selfish, keeping him waiting in her room like a pet while she was at school. It wouldn't have been a big deal to take one day off to focus on him, especially considering neither of them knew how much time he had before he'd be gone forever. She scoffed at herself disdainfully; even when a literal ghost appeared in her room, she was still more concerned about her perfect attendance record. Part of her wanted to try and find him, but where would she start? She was half-considering going to his uncle's house when her mother knocked sharply.

“Chrissy, are you awake? Didn't you say school let out early yesterday?”

“Uh, yeah, why?”

“That's interesting, because one of the counselors called me and said you took off in the middle of the day.”

Oh shit. “Uhh, sorry, I wasn't really feeling well-”

“Please, dear, haven't we moved past all this? I thought you were coping with everything.”

“I was, I mean I am, I just-”

“Well, I had to convince them not to give you detention, so you'd better get yourself there on time and don't start any trouble, young lady. I have too much at stake in this community to have a troublemaking daughter running around.”

Chrissy smiled grimly. “Sure, mom, I'll behave myself.” Like one of those purebred poodles the neighbors pay three grand for.

“That's my girl! I have lots of things to take care of so I'll be late.”

Chrissy sighed and dragged herself out of bed, wondering what her next move was. Even if Eddie was rightfully done with her, she still had a feeling something was amiss about his death. She knew the local cops wouldn't give her anything to go off of, but maybe they'd talked to his family? She knew Nancy worked for the school paper; maybe they could team up and figure this whole thing out. As she got dressed for the day, her eyes kept flicking back towards her alarm clock, hoping just a little bit that it would switch itself on and start playing loud music.

–

Chrissy sat alone at one of the lunch tables at the back of the room, fiddling with the opening of her milk carton and scanning the nearby tables. She vaguely knew where the students who were into journalism and yearbook sat, though she wanted to go directly to Nancy and minimize the chance of running into any of the other cheerleaders or athletes. They had mostly given her the cold shoulder that morning, and she'd been glad to return the favor. After a while she spotted the girl, dressed in a cream turtleneck and speaking intently with another student. Chrissy grimaced nervously as she approached the group, hoping they wouldn't actively shun her.

“I mean, there are any number of possibilities here, we can't just-” Nancy cut herself off mid-conversation to look at the approaching cheerleader with her large and piercing eyes. Chrissy found herself a little tongue-tied and almost withered under Nancy's gaze.

“Hi?” Nancy said questioningly after a long pause.

“Uh, hi, Nancy? Um, sorry to bother you, I just...do you remember me at all?”

“Sure, Chrissy, right? How are you?”

The girl chuckled bashfully and cleared her throat. “I...great. I mean, okay. You know, it's...it's an odd time with everything going on.”

“Everything? You mean Eddie's death? Did you know him?”

“Uh...I mean, kind of? I'm trying to get to know him, which, kind of late for that now, right?” Oh my god, are you incapable of having a normal conversation?

Nancy's mouth quirked up in a smile. “Do you want to go for a walk, Chrissy? Maybe talk privately?”

“Yeah, that would be great.”

Nancy threw a look at the friend she'd been speaking to, and he nodded and started gathering up some papers that had been strewn about. She led Chrissy out of the room and down towards the running track. They began to walk a slow loop around the track, although there were a few girls running laps around them.

“Jesus, they must be freezing out here,” Chrissy said with concern.

“Yeah. Some of them come out here during lunch instead of eating, then they go home and tell their parents they had a big lunch. It's really awful.”

“Oh...yeah. Well, you know. Some people don't want to accept help, I guess. They close themselves off until things get so bad that people can't help but notice.”

Nancy looked at her with a searching gaze; if she didn't know any better, she'd swear the other girl could see right through her.

“Do you want to tell me what's so bad, Chrissy? What is it that you need help with? I promise, I'm here for you.”

“Oh, um, nothing! I mean, it's fine, everything's fine. I'm fine. It's just, I've been having this experience for the last day or so.”

“An experience? Okay, what's been happening?”

“Well...” She searched Nancy's face for any hint of disdain or judgment.

Nancy took her cold hand between hers, which were somehow still warm. “Everything we discuss stays between us, Chrissy, you have my word.”

“As a fledgling journalist?”

“As a friend.”

The same warm feeling that had filled Chrissy's chest when speaking to Eddie came to her now. She hadn't talked to Nancy in years, but she acted like no time had passed between them. She felt herself trusting the other girl's intentions.

“Okay, so I know this sounds really crazy, trust me. The night before last, I woke up in the middle of the night and Eddie Munson was in my room. Like, in ghost form. And he was there yesterday, but we kind of fought, and he took off to try and see his family, and I haven't seen him since.”

Nancy looked taken aback a moment, and Chrissy considered running and not looking back until she reached another school district. “I'm sorry, it's...I'm probably just hallucinating or something. Maybe I've finally snapped.”

Nancy shook her head, making her voluminous hair bounce a little. “No, please don't say that. I believe you, Chrissy. You are being serious, aren't you? Because if this is something the other cheerleaders have put you up to-”

“I promise, I would not say this out loud, even as a prank, if I didn't believe it. He was there, and we talked. We even lay down in my bed together.”

The other girl quirked an eyebrow but didn't comment further. “Okay, if you're serious, I have something I should tell you too. There's, uh, some things that go on in Hawkins that a lot of people don't know about. Do you have some time?”

Chrissy knew she should get back in time for her next class to avoid another call home to her mother. Something in Nancy's blazing eyes called to her though, and for the first time in a long time, she found herself eager to know more about someone else's strange life.

“Sure.”

–

They made their way to a milkshake shop, and for the next hour, Chrissy was regaled with stories of parallel dimensions, government cover-ups, tragic deaths and a girl with otherworldly powers.

“Oh, so that's why the mall burned down, huh? The other cheerleaders were pissed when that happened.”

Nancy laughed, nearly choking on her vanilla bean milkshake. “That's your takeaway from all this? I just told you about, like, fifty mind-blowing things and your concern is the Starcourt Mall?”

Chrissy shrugged, swirling her straw into what was left of her orange float. “They had a really good bookstore.”

“You do believe me, right? Like, I know ghosts existing is a big thing to wrap your head around, but it's kind of small potatoes compared to the things I've seen.”

“I do, actually. If ghosts are real, why the hell shouldn't the rest be? God, I always thought Indiana was so boring.”

“Oh, there are definitely points of interest, if you know where to look.”

Chrissy smiled and wondered if the rumors and Nancy dating the cute photographer were true.

“So have you been able to find anything out? About Eddie, I mean.”

“A bit, yeah. Thankfully, death certificates are public record in this state. The cause of death is...concerning.”

“How so?”

“Well, it lists the primary cause of death as 'blunt force trauma' but that could mean anything. Then my editor and I were thinking, why would they hold that rally and scare a bunch of kids and parents unless there was someone, or something, really dangerous out there. So we started looking for any unusual deaths that have taken place recently and...” Nancy brandished a neatly folded newspaper article and placed it on the table.

Chrissy unfolded it and saw the headline of the article, “Local Vagrant Beaten to Death, Authorities Still Looking for Leads.”

“Jesus.”

“I know. Keep reading.”

The article was from a few months ago, and it detailed how, in the early morning hours of September 19, a jogger had stumbled upon the body of Drew Morrison, a thirty-six year old homeless man who'd presumably been attacked. Both his arms and legs had been broken and twisted in sickening fashion, and even his jaw was left broken and askew.

“His eyes. They...they gouged out his eyes?”

Nancy nodded grimly.

“I never even heard about this.”

“Yeah, well they kept it on page eight at the very bottom of that day's paper. It's not exactly light morning reading. Between you and me, the Post is going under, and they have to sell papers, you know?”

“Do they know who did this?”

Nancy nodded slightly at the paper Chrissy was holding. “Know what 'authorities still looking for leads' means?”

“That they have no leads and aren't actually looking? Because he was homeless, right? I mean, why bother using resources on this?”

“Mm-hm. That's Hawkins police for you.”

“Fuckers,” Chrissy muttered.

Nancy laughed and crossed her arms. “You know, you're a little different than I thought you'd be. More fiery.”

Chrissy shrugged, smiling. “I tend to keep that part of myself under wraps. Makes it easier to blend into the background.”

“And does that make you happy?”

She met the other girl's hard gaze. “I thought this was about Eddie.”

“Just wondering, is all.”

“So...you think this has to do with him?”

“Maybe. I'm going to head over to his uncle's place after school. I tried to call earlier but the phone was disconnected.”

“Interesting.”

“Very. Want to come with?”

“Absolutely.”

–

As Nancy pulled up to the dilapidated trailer, a scruffy-looking dog in the next yard began to bark. Chrissy followed her up to the door with some trepidation; she hadn't been in a neighborhood like this since she was a child.

“Don't worry, Chris, they won't bite.”

Nancy knocked firmly three times; when no one answered, she stage whispered, “Look through the window.”

“What?”

“See if anyone's home.”

Chrissy stood on her toes and peered through the screened window; an older man lay on the couch with a guitar stood up next to him.

“Someone's in there. It must be his uncle.”

“If you all are from the Hawkins Post again, pardon my language but you can kindly fuck off.”

Chrissy jumped and nearly fell backwards, but Nancy kept her composure.

“Mr. Munson? Wayne Munson? We're not from the Post, we're actually students at the school that Eddie attended. We were hoping you could help us. A lot of the students are concerned that they're unsafe, that what happened to Eddie could happen to them.”

Wayne chuckled darkly from inside the trailer. “I doubt that very much. Whatever killed my nephew was most assuredly not human, possibly not of this world. As long as you kids quit messing around in those woods at night you should be alright.”

The two girls exchanged a meaningful look. “Mr. Munson, please. Eddie had a lot of close friends, and they want to know who or what took their friend away. Anything you tell us could be of great help.”

Chrissy held her breath in anticipation; after a minute the man unlocked the door and beckoned them inside. “Make it quick, girls, I've got work in an hour.”

They took a seat at a wooden table that had likely seen many impromptu game sessions. Nancy surreptitiously pulled out a small notebook.

“First of all, sir, I wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss-”

“You know, it's funny, barely anyone's said that to me since it happened. Not the cops, not the neighbors, not even the guys at the plant. Guess he wasn't exactly a pillar of the community, was he?”

“You wouldn't say that if you saw the guys he played D&D with. I talked to them yesterday, they were pretty inconsolable.” Nancy flashed a warning look at her but Wayne seemed to take her comment in stride.

“He was just like me in that way. Not exactly a barrel of sunshine to everyone, but the people he loved, he loved as hard and as much as he could. Feel bad for those kids. That's the only reason I'm talking to you now. I don't want to see this in the damn school newsletter or the yearbook, you hear?”

“Absolutely, Mr. Munson. This stays between us.”

“Call me Wayne.”

“Wayne, what can you tell us about Eddie's death?”

He sighed, looking older and worn down. “Nothing but what they told me down at the station. On Saturday night going on into Sunday morning, someone found his body on the outskirts of the woods. All his...limbs were broken like they were toothpicks. His eyes...god, he had his momma's eyes. When I saw him in the morgue, they were gone, just two sockets where they used to be. No one could tell me a thing about what happened or who could have done this to him. They put his time of death around 11:40 that night.”

Chrissy had a sudden flash of her alarm clock, glowing strongly in the darkness of her room the night she'd been woken up.

11:47 PM.

She clenched her teeth together, fighting off a sudden urge to scream.

“They pulled us into a rally on Monday and told us to stay together and stay out of the woods. Do they have any idea who did this? Any leads at all?”

“The cops in this town couldn't find a string if it was tied around their necks. Only thing I know is that...ah hell, it hardly matters now but I'm ashamed to say it.”

“Go ahead, Wayne. This stays between us.”

“He and I had an argument earlier in the day. Some little schoolgirl smoked some pot he'd sold her and didn't so well on her exams, and her mother gave me hell in the vegetable aisle. Said my nephew was a menace and a burden to the town. So I told him to cut that shit out if he ever wanted to graduate and do something with his life, and he said the only reason I cared about it now was that I'd been publicly embarrassed. Can't say he was wrong, in any case.”

“I'm sorry, Wayne. I'm sure you guys would have made up.”

“Yeah, well...nothing for it now, you know? Gotta keep going for Taylor, if not for me.”

“She hasn't been in school,” Chrissy piped up. “Is she doing okay?”

Wayne was quiet for a moment, looking contemplatively at the girls. “Hasn't been doing too well, actually. Been getting bad headaches, nosebleeds. Not sleeping through the night since it happened. Can't blame her, though. He was everything to her, her hero. I haven't told her exactly how it happened or what he looked like. Figured she's got enough nightmares as it is.”

“Can I see her? She's on the cheer squad with me, and it might help to-”

“Cheer squad, eh?” His face took on a sour look. “You know, Eddie encouraged her to try out for it, but from what I hear she's been getting a lot of comments about how her uniform doesn't fit right or how she can't concentrate on the routines. You girls ever think about why that is? About how maybe the uniform is borrowed from a neighbor's girl who graduated, or she can't think straight half the time because the cops are over here every other damn night banging on someone's door. You two would be in the same boat if you were in her position.”

Chrissy fell silent, feeling chagrined.

“We understand, Mr. Munson. You know, when I tried out for the squad a long time ago, Chrissy here was the only one who helped me up after I fell. She's not one of the mean ones, I promise.”

“Well, if you say so, missy. She's the second door down on the right, can't miss her.”

Chrissy nodded a thanks to Nancy and made her way to Taylor's door. She knocked softly and saw the door was already open a crack. She opened it to find the girl sitting cross-legged on her bed, thin headphones hidden inside her hair and a Walkman in her hand.

“Hey Taylor, I just came by to check in on you and your uncle. What are you listening to?”

Taylor's eyes, so much like Eddie's, gazed at her owlishly. “My neighbor let me borrow this for the week. We don't really have a music player, but she knew...I have to promise not to damage it, it's expensive.”

“I bet.” Chrissy fought down a wave of guilt, knowing she had at least two spare Walkmans that had been lost somewhere in the shuffle of her bedroom.

Taylor lifted the headphones from her curly hair and placed them delicately on Chrissy's ears.

Winter is here again, oh lord

Chrissy gasped and had to hold back tears as Taylor watched her. It was the same Journey song that Eddie had played the night he had showed up in her room.

“Is this your favorite song, Taylor?”

“I mean, I like it, but it was really Eddie's song. He used to play that metal stuff when he was with his friends, but secretly he really liked Journey and bands like that. Oh, and that other song, California Dreamin? He would play that on guitar for hours and make Wayne so mad. He used to talk about going to California and seeing the ocean a lot. He never left Indiana, you know. I told him people are the same there as they are here. He said at least in California there was sunshine every day, and you could be anything you wanted. Here you were just...you know.”

Chrissy nodded, understanding what she meant. “Taylor, I'm so sorry about what happened. And I'm sorry I haven't been by until now.”

“It's fine. Up until now no one else has even bothered.”

“Your uncle said you've been having nightmares?”

Taylor pursed her lips and her eyes flicked to Chrissy's face. “Can you keep a secret?”

“Yeah, of course.”

Taylor slid off the bed and quietly closed the door.

“Chrissy, I haven't told this to my uncle yet, but I'm...maybe I'm just being crazy, but I feel like whatever happened to Eddie is going to happen to me. I know something really messed up happened to him. They thought I was asleep when they talked in the kitchen, but I heard something about broken bones and warning the kids in town. Chrissy, he was having headaches and nosebleeds a few weeks before it happened, same as me. And last night I had this...I guess you'd call it a vision. I was in the bathroom, and everything was normal, and all of a sudden I see him in the mirror. Eddie was there, only it was a messed up version of him. His eyes were gone, and his arm bones were at these crazy angles. He said something about how he was in hell and he didn't want to be alone, and how I should just give up and join him. Then Wayne was there too, talking about what a burden I was and how glad he was that Eddie was gone, how that was one less mouth to feed. I screamed until Wayne showed up, like real Wayne, and asked what was wrong. I told him I was just having a nightmare, how I'd fallen asleep in the tub, but I don't know if he believed me.”

“Oh my god.”

“Ever since, I haven't been able to shake that feeling. The only thing that helps is listening to those two songs on repeat. But I have to give this back soon-”

“I'll bring you one. I'm sure I have an extra somewhere.”

“Really?”

“Absolutely. If it's the only thing that makes you feel better, it's the least I can do.”

Taylor smiled for the first time and slipped the headphones back on. “Thanks, Chrissy. I always knew you were nice.”

“It does get easier, you know. I know it doesn't seem like it now, but you'll get there. He'd be proud of you, Taylor.”

Chrissy stood to hug the girl before leaving, hoping she could keep Taylor's fears at bay for at least a little while.

–

She filled Nancy in on what she had learned as they drove back to Chrissy's house.

“Okay, so Drew and Eddie died in extremely similar ways. And now Taylor is having the same symptoms Eddie did before he died.”

“Yeah, it's very fucking eerie. I'm worried about her, Nancy. Do you think this has to do with the Upside Down?”

“It's definitely possible. I need to talk to Mike and Dustin and see if they know anything.”

“Okay, keep me posted. In the meantime, I need to catch up on trig homework.”

Nancy gave her a sly smile but said nothing.

“What? We have a test on Friday.”

“I know. Just...we're kind of facing a big thing here. You know, the afterlife, alternate dimensions, potential for additional horrific murders.”

“Hopefully the only horrific murder will be my mom chewing me out for skipping class again.”

“Are you really that afraid of her, Chris?”

“I'm not afraid, I just want to not make waves with her. She's so concerned about appearances and perfect grades and me getting into a good school or whatever. Ever since my dad died, I've just been trying to make things easier on her.”

“What about being easy on yourself? I'm sure at the end of the day she'd rather you be passionate and engaged with the world, even if it means making trouble sometimes.”

“Well, it's easy for you to say. You have the resilience and intelligence to back it all up. I guess I'm afraid that if I put myself out there more, it won't be good enough for anyone.”

“You'd rather be disconnected from everything?”

“Right now I'd rather go home and have dinner than continue this conversation.”

“At least you're being forthright.”

Chrissy laughed and rolled her eyes.

–

As Chrissy slipped quietly into her bedroom and shut the door behind her, she was met with a sudden chill. She wondered if she had left the window open, but quickly enough she saw the reason for the cold. Eddie was back, curled up on her bed in a nearly fetal position; he had wrapped his long arms around himself and looked to be flickering in and out of reality, his skin deathly pale.

“Oh my God, Eddie!” She quickly dropped her bag and wrapped herself around him, feeling his form give under the weight of her embrace.

“No, no, please, come back to me, don't do this, Eddie, please!” she begged, not knowing if he could even hear her. He was shaking and muttering something she couldn't make out; she reached up to take his face in her hands.

“Eddie, I'm here, okay, don't worry, I'm right here, you're not going anywhere.”

“C-cold,” he managed to get out between flickers. “I'm so cold.”

“Okay, don't worry, get under this blanket-”

“N-no, need you. P-please, Chrissy, need you to hold-”

“I promise, I've got you. I'm not moving.”

She suddenly heard the front door open and her mother's footsteps come loudly up the staircase; she could tell Laura was angry from her stride.

“Fuck!” Chrissy did the only thing she could think and dashed to her door, locking it. She raced back to her bed and wrapped Eddie tighter, running her fingers through his hair, along his shoulders, anywhere she could reach him.

Her doorknob jiggled. “Christine, open the door! Your school called again, saying you ran off and skipped your fourth period class. What in god's name is going on with you?”

“Nothing, I told you I haven't been feeling well. I took a long lunch with a friend, alright? Can you please back off and let me be?”

Her mother's silence on the other side of the door told her she had crossed a line, but right then she didn't care. Eddie's shaking had subsided a little, but he still looked close to fading.

“You and I are going to have a conversation in the morning,” Laura huffed before storming off.

Chrissy sighed with relief, burying her face in Eddie's neck.

“Th-that was pretty punk rock of you.”

She laughed raucously. “Yeah, only took eighteen years to grow a spine.”

“Better late than never.”

She kissed him then, feeling more alive than she had in years. Relief flooded through her as his body finally solidified under her touch; he even managed to wrap her in his arms and shift her so she was on top of him.

“Eddie, god, you scared me so bad. Please don't do that again.”

“Yeah, not planning on it. I got so lost, Chris. After I left, I tried going home to see my family, but I kept getting turned around and going in circles. After a while, everything around me kind of faded away, and I was in this weird fucking grey void. Eventually I started to fade, like I could see my hands getting paler and glitching out. It's a miracle I even made it back here, honestly.”

“How did you find your way?”

“I thought about you. At first it was just remembering how I felt being around you, then it was almost like I could sense you. Were you at my uncle's?”

“I was, I went with Nancy Wheeler. We were trying to figure out what had happened to you.”

“Even though you might never see me again?”

“Yeah, well...I still wanted to know. If something bad happened to you, I wanted to bring you justice. I thought maybe you'd be able to feel me trying, even if you were gone.”

“That's so fucking romantic.”

Chrissy blushed, toying with his curls. “I was just trying to be a good person for once. Not just get through life but actually try to do something good with it.”

“Glad I could be your guiding light.”

“Shut up,” she said, kissing him again.

–

The next morning found them nestled together under the duvet, sunlight flickering weakly through the trees. Chrissy moved slowly away, not wanting to disturb Eddie's rest. She made to move towards the bathroom when he spoke up.

“Chrissy,” he said softly. “I think I know what happened. I think I can remember now.”

She sat next to him again and took his hand in hers. “Go ahead, Eddie, I'm here.”

He sighed. “So Saturday, right? Wayne and I had gotten into it that afternoon. I guess some prissy cheerleader failed her SATs because she got a little too high and couldn't remember how to multiply. So the girl's mom just confronts Wayne at the Stop 'n Shop, tells him that we should both get out of town before we corrupt any more innocent, god-fearing youths. As if I forced her to smoke weed or something.”

“That's fucked up, Eddie, I'm sorry. Some of the cheer moms can be a little intense.”

“Yeah, no shit. So Wayne comes at me and says I have to grow up at some point, and I say something about how we wouldn't have food half the time if I didn't bring in money. He never hit me before, but I could see the thought cross his mind. I just had to get out of there and cool off, but the cops don't like me wandering around town for some reason. Loitering, they call it. So I walk through the woods for a few hours, feeling sorry for myself, and eventually it gets to be pretty late. I'm debating whether to crawl home and apologize or just dig myself a nice hole to sleep in when I stumble across a bonfire held by some basketball douches. I guess they'd just lost one of their little games and were feeling kind of sore, because they started fucking with me.”

“Do you remember who they were?”

“Ah hell, Chris, I couldn't tell those guys apart even when I was alive.”

Chrissy ran to her bookshelf and sat the yearbook down next to him.

“Here,” she said, flipping through the pages until she found what she was looking for. “Pretty much all the same guys are on the team this year as last year.”

“Okay, this guy was one of them. And I think this guy too.” He'd pointed to Devon and Bryce in the yearbook.

“Figures. Anyone else?”

He scanned the pages intently before settling on one more picture. “This was the guy that started the whole thing.”

A boy with fair hair and a winning smile stared up from the page in glossy black and white. Next to his picture was the name Jason Carver.

“Eddie, are you sure you're remembering right? Jason's always been nice to me.”

“Yeah, that's cause he wants...well, trust me, it was these three assholes.”

“So what happened exactly?”

“Well, they were making a racket out there, and I approached to see what was going on and maybe ask them to pipe down. That's when I see they've gone through an eighteen-pack between the three of them. Carver starts getting in my face, calling me scum and saying I ruined a good girl's future, and how it won't be the last time I fuck someone over, and how I should drown myself in the lake. You know, just guy talk. The other two start circling me, trying to intimidate me, and I put my hands up, you know, to try and show I mean no harm and want to get out of there. In their drunken, riled-up state of mind, they take that to mean I want to fight. Then they start shoving me and getting really physical. Now, as I've stated, the cops in this town don't exactly love me, so I don't want to mess up some pretty boy's face and have him charge me with assault. At this point, I'm on the ground, just taking all their fucking hits, when one of them gets me in the back of the head with a beer bottle.”

“What the fuck?”

“My thoughts exactly. At that point, logic finally kicks in and they turn tail and run before I wind up dead.”

“And did you? Is that what killed you?”

“Surprisingly, no. I was still conscious, although I was in so much pain I wished I wasn't. I try to get up so I can get the fuck out of there, and then...god, you're not going to believe me when I tell you this.”

“I think we're kind of past that.”

“Alright so I see Wayne in front of me, but it's not really Wayne. It's more of a...”

“Vision?”

“Yeah. He's saying all this stuff about how I'd be better off dead, how he wishes I had never darkened his doorstep and what a piece of shit I'll wind up being. Then my dad shows up and says he's glad he overdosed, because at least he doesn't have to see me fucking up my own life. And all the while, this fucking grandfather clock keeps going off in my head, louder than anything I've ever heard. Then this weird fucking naked dude shows up and says how it's time for my suffering to end, which was a lie, because he reaches his hand up and grabs my face, and then I can feel all my bones breaking. Next thing I know, I wind up here two days later.”

“At 11:47 PM. The time you died.”

“Shit, if you say so.”

Chrissy was silent for a long moment before responding.

“Wait, naked?”

“Yeah, like, he had this weird red snakey skin and this really deep voice. I didn't really have time to process it, honestly.”

“Yeah, that's a lot to take in. But Eddie...”

“What?”

“It's Taylor. I think she's in danger. When we were there yesterday, she told me she was having those visions, and the headaches and the nosebleeds-”

“Fuck, we have to do something. Please, Chrissy, we need to save her. I can't let that happen to my sister.”

“I know, I...fuck, I forgot.”

“Forgot what?”

“I need to give her my Walkman. She said listening to music was the only thing that made her feel better. Help me find it, I know I have a spare somewhere!”

“Okay, uhh...here, I got it!” He had found it at the bottom of one of her junk drawers.

Chrissy threw on her cheerleading skirt and grabbed the device from him. “Okay, I have to go. I'll let you know how she is!”

“Are you going to school afterwards?”

“I don't know, fuck, maybe! Who can think about school when there's ghosts and demons and alternate dimensions?”

“Alternate dimensions?”

“Yeah, it's a long story, I'll tell you later.”

“Wait, am I the ghost or demon?”

“What do you think, dummy?” She quickly kissed him before dashing out the bedroom door. It was still early enough that her mother hadn't awoken, and she sped to her car, hoping she wasn't too late.

–

Wayne Munson was awoken by a frantic knock at 7:18 AM, approximately ten hours before his night shift, which made this time the middle of the night for him. He rubbed his eyes and threw on a pair of pants, hoping to god whoever was at the door was worth it. When he opened it, he saw one of the girls who'd been by yesterday, disheveled and out of breath, brandishing something yellow.

“Wayne, sorry, didn't mean to wake you. Is Taylor okay, I mean awake?”

“Uh, come in and see for yourself.” He moved to let her in, somewhat bemused at her sudden investment into their lives.

“Thank you!” she panted, making her way to Taylor's bedroom and knocking. The girl let her in, looking startled at the intrusion.

“Got it, I've got it!” she said triumphantly, handing the Walkman to Taylor.

“Oh, wow, thanks Chrissy. I didn't think you'd remember, honestly.”

“No way, I want to make sure you're doing okay. Are you, I mean? Did you sleep alright?”

The girl shrugged, sitting down on her bed and sliding the tape into her new Walkman. “Okay, I guess. Better than I have been, now that I know...I mean, I know it's stupid, but most of the people in this town hated Eddie. It's nice to know that at least a few people want to do right by him and his friends. The freaks, they call them. Well, they call me that too. I've been thinking about quitting cheer. I mean, I already was before all this anyways.”

“Taylor, come on, you've been doing great. You've improved so much since you started out.”

“Yeah, but I don't know. Some of the girls say some pretty mean things behind my back. I act like I don't notice, but it kind of gets to me.”

“Listen, the next time anyone so much as looks at you funny, they're going to have to answer to me.”

Taylor smiled widely. “What's with you, Chrissy? It's like you changed overnight. I mean, you've always been nice, but...”

“But not in a way that would involve sticking my neck out, right? I don't know, I guess I've been recently inspired to change my ways a little.”

“You kind of remind me of him now. He used to have my back on everything, and ever since he's been gone, it's like I'm alone in the world.”

“What about Wayne?”

“I mean, I love him, but he sort of keeps to himself, you know? Eddie was my rock. I know some brothers hate their sisters, but he was always good to me.”

“He'll always be with you. And I will too. I promise, you can come to me for anything. You think you're going to come back to school soon?”

“Maybe next week? I think I just need another couple of days to get my head straight.”

“Of course. I'll see you then, okay?”

The two girls wrapped each other in a hug and Chrissy made her way out, waving to Wayne as he watched her curiously.

–

Chrissy got to her first class just in time, although she looked a little more wild than normal, with her hair loose and no pristine makeup applied. She could hear one of the other cheerleaders snickering behind her but ignored it. After a few minutes of relative peace, the intercom clicked to life and called her to the principal's office. The laughter of the others increased, and her face burned hot as she gathered her belongings.

When she arrived at the office, she was confronted with the sight of her mother, perfectly coiffed as usual, wearing a look of grave concern.

“Chrissy, dear, I just wanted to stop by and make sure you had found your way to school. After all, you seem to be having such a hard time with it lately.

“I was in class until you called me in here for no reason,” she sniped back.

“Christine, that's no way to talk to your mother,” the principal, who was positioned at his mahogany desk behind Laura, piped up. “We all just want what's best for you, and that involves staying in school until the day is over, understand?”

“Yes, sir,” she said through clenched teeth, deeply resenting the condescension he was oozing.

“Would you mind if I have a quick chat with her outside? I'll have her back to class in a jiffy.”

“Of course, Laura. You ladies take care now.”

Chrissy kept the same tight smile on her face until they were fully in the hallway. “What's up, Laura? You want me to stay in class and then you pull me out to tell me to stay where I already am?”

“What has gotten into you, Christine? What are you trying to prove with this little late bloomer teenage rebellion? Don't think I won't pull you out of cheer the minute-”

“I don't care about cheer, I never have! I only did it so you'd leave me alone and get your own life. God, ever since dad died, all you've done is try to act like everything is fine and normal, like you're afraid of anyone feeling anything besides happiness. It's fake, mom! You know, we're allowed to be sad and hurt and angry, and we're supposed to care about stuff besides dresses and tablecloths and goddamn banquet dinners-”

Laura slapped her hard, hard enough for the sound to echo around the empty hallway.

“Watch your mouth, you little bitch. Don't think you hold any power here just because you feel grown up all of a sudden.”

Chrissy shook her head at Laura. “He'd be so disappointed in what you've become. Dad was a real person with goals and fears and dreams. He didn't surround himself with bullshit to make himself feel superior. I'm going back to class now, which is clearly all you care about anyways.”

She walked away from Laura with her back straight, willing herself to keep from crying in front of her mother. Chrissy had the secret satisfaction of knowing she'd gotten a full-ride academic scholarship to an out of state school, and would likely see very little of her mother after graduation. She had been undecided in her major up to now, but the journalism field suddenly seemed very appealing.

–

After lunch, Chrissy made her way to where she'd first spoken to Nancy yesterday, and one of her fellow student journalists told her to meet Nancy at the wooden table in the woods behind the gym. She knew that was where a lot of kids met to buy or sell drugs, but she shrugged and figured Nancy knew best. As she navigated around the tables, she saw Jason approach her with a wide smile.

“Chrissy, hey, what's up? Do you have a minute? I kind of need to talk to you.”

“I'm sorry, Jason, I'm meeting someone.”

“Who, the cops? Or old man Munson again?”

She stopped short and looked him full in the face. His grin had turned wolfish and something sinister shone in his eyes.

“Why does that concern you exactly?”

“Oh, you know, just making sure my girl isn't getting in over her head on something she has no business with.”

“I'm not your girl, and it is my business.”

Jason quickly moved toward her and grabbed her upper arm. “Listen, bitch, I don't know who you think you are-”

She twisted out of his grasp and hurried away, looking over her shoulder to ensure she wasn't being followed. If she wasn't sure before, she definitely was now. Eddie was telling the truth, and Jason was going to do everything he could to stop her from taking him down. But how could she even do so? She had no proof except the word of someone who no one else could see or hear; no one else had been at the bonfire from what Eddie had said. She hoped Nancy would have some idea on how to proceed.

Chrissy breathed a sigh of relief as she reached the splintered table where Nancy, Mike, Dustin and a few others sat.

“Hey, sorry to make you come out here,” Nancy said. “I figured it would be best to talk about this stuff without a bunch of people listening.”

“Isn't this where Eddie used to do his deals?” Dustin asked.

“Sometimes he would bring people to his trailer when his uncle was out,” piped up a pony-tailed redhead Chrissy didn't know.

“Chrissy, this is Max, and that's Lucas.”

“Hey,” she said, lifting her arm to wave but wincing at the pain.

“You okay?” Nancy asked with concern.

“Yeah, I...Jason came up to me in the lunch room and said something about Eddie not being my business, and then he grabbed my arm pretty hard. I think he left a bruise.”

“Jesus, why would he say something like that?”

Chrissy filled the group in on what Eddie had said, although she first had to explain a few times that yes, Eddie was a ghost who was staying in her room and no, he didn't have ectoplasm or chains and lockboxes like the ghosts in A Christmas Carol.

Nancy looked almost pleased when Chrissy was finished. “Ok, wow, that actually makes a lot of sense with the theory that we had. So the way this thing works-”

“Vecna. I think we should call it Vecna, like from D&D,” Dustin said confidently.

“Alright, Vecna. The way Vecna works is he targets someone vulnerable, someone who's going through some inner turmoil. For Drew it was probably being homeless, for Eddie it was the fight he'd had with his uncle and getting beaten up by Jason and his goons, and for Taylor...”

Chrissy nodded. “It's Eddie's death. Not to mention the shit she has to deal with on a daily basis for being kind of-”

“Poor?” Max asked pointedly.

“I was going to say disenfranchised. Or disillusioned.”

“Sound like big words for being a poor kid in a hick town.”

“Anyways,” Nancy said, getting back to her spiel. “He targets a person going through a hard time, and he plagues them with headaches, nosebleeds, nightmares, and eventually visions. Visions of parents, brothers, friends validating their worst fears. And Eddie said something about a grandfather clock?”

“That seems like the final step. Taylor didn't mention seeing one in her mirror vision, so I assume once you see that, it's the last one until...”

“Until your limbs all get broken and twisted and your eyes get gouged out,” Lucas said grimly.

“Yeah.”

“So how do we stop it happening to Taylor or anyone else?” Mike asked.

“And how do we get those pieces of shit to confess to what they did?” Dustin said.

“Taylor's running out of time,” Chrissy intoned. “First we deal with Vecna, then we can figure out how to take down Jason and the others.”

“They could be halfway to some private island by then! Now they know you and Nancy are onto them, who knows what they're capable of?”

“I know, trust me. But even if we had proof, which we don't, they're going to say they beat him up, not killed him.”

“They threw a beer bottle at his head! He could have been dead for all they knew.”

“Yeah, but is anyone going to think them capable of tearing his eyes out of his sockets?”

Nancy placed her hands flat on the table and everyone came to a standstill; it reminded Chrissy of a judge banging a gavel.

“Okay, one thing at a time, guys. I agree that stopping Vecna is technically the more pressing concern right now. Although trying to find proof of what they did couldn't hurt. I wish we could get access to the police report to see if they've dug up anything.”

“I doubt it. Max and I can go to where it happened to see if we can find proof. Maybe we'll get lucky and we'll find a piece of the bottle they can get prints from,” Lucas offered.

“That would be awesome. In the meantime we need to wrap our heads around this Vecna thing.”

As important as the current discussion was, Chrissy found herself gazing down at the worn table where Eddie had made so many of his drug deals, likely including the one that would inadvertently end his life. Along the edge, she saw “Class of '86” carved in sharp relief with what looked like a pen knife. She traced the jagged letters with her fingers, wondering what the vibrant Eddie of only a few weeks ago would think of the conversation they were having.

“Chrissy, still with us?” Nancy asked sharply.

“Yeah,” she said, blinking back tears. “I'm here.”

–

“You really think this is going to work?” Chrissy asked Nancy as they hurried their way back to class. Although she had told her mother off, she still wanted to avoid a write up for being late and possibly get saddled with detention. “I mean, you know this...Eleven girl better than me, so I'll take your word for it.”

“She goes by El. And yeah, honestly, she's our best hope. She's done this kind of thing before, a couple times.”

“And if we can't pull this off? Do we have a plan B?”

Nancy was silent for a long moment, which she took to mean the strange girl with superpowers was not just their best hope but their only hope.

“It'll work,” Nancy said with finality. Although she wasn't quite ready to say it out loud, Chrissy fiercely admired how the other girl seemed to go through life with a certain sense of quiet bravado. She had heard once that acting confident was half the battle to being confident, and Nancy was living proof. She hoped she could feign some of that confidence for her own all-important task.

“So now I just have to convince Taylor to go for it. That's going to be tricky, considering we basically just started being friends.”

They had reached the door of the room where Chrissy's next class was, and Nancy turned to look her full in the face. Chrissy gasped a little when the other girl took her hands in hers.

“Chrissy, you can do this. I understand it's hard to put yourself out there for other people, but we need you...Taylor needs you to show her some of that fire and passion that I know you have.”

Chrissy bit her cheek to keep from smiling too widely; Nancy's eyes shone luminously into hers, and it made her feel like she really could do anything. She nodded, determined as she'd ever been. The moment was broken by one of the jocks shoving into her shoulder as he made his way into the room.

“Ugh,” Chrissy muttered. “What's wrong with everyone at this school?”

“Easy, tiger. Let me know how it goes, okay?”

“I'll head there straight after school, I promise.”

Nancy pulled her into a hug just as the bell rang, then pushed her into the room so she wasn't counted late. Chrissy made her way to her normal desk, feeling a little lightheaded from the sudden contact. Almost immediately, she felt herself getting pelted by small bits of paper from the desks behind her. She pulled one wad out of her hair, unfolding it to see the word dyke scribbled in capital letters. She clenched her fist and felt herself turn red but didn't give them the satisfaction of looking their way.

Devon slid his desk closer to hers, and she could almost smell his breath. Her brows furrowed; had he been drinking?

“Hey! Is that why you won't go out with Carver? You'd rather get with that uptight little-”

“Mr. Murphy! Can we concentrate, please?”

Chrissy breathed a sigh of relief as the teacher did his job for once. She spent the rest of class mentally preparing for what she was going to say to Taylor after school.

–

“Okay, so...let me get this straight. My headaches are being caused by something out of a...parallel dimension? And it wants to kill me for some reason, just like it killed Eddie. And your plan is to...”

“Lure him into your mind in a safe and controlled environment. Then, when he's about to strike, Eleven, the girl who's basically got superpowers, is going to tap into your consciousness and kill him, or whatever the equivalent of killing him would be.”

“Uh-huh. Wouldn't that kill me?”

“No! No, she's done this before, she's very precise. Trust me, this is our best bet to deal with this.”

Taylor smiled slyly at Chrissy; for a long moment, the soft guitar of California Dreamin coming from the Walkman was the only sound between them.

“You know, I really wish you and my brother had been friends. You guys could have been creative writing buddies, swapping stories or whatever. He was always into that kind of stuff.”

“Taylor...” Chrissy gestured helplessly at the girl, who'd begun to doodle on the cuffs of her jeans. “I promise it's not just a story. Nancy told me all about what she and her brother and their friends have been through. Hawkins is not just some sleepy little town, it's...crazy stuff happens here.”

“Nancy Wheeler? I remember her from my civics class. She was always getting into debates with Mr. Henley on why trickle-down economies are bullshit. Can't exactly say I disagree.”

“Yeah, fuck Reagan.”

Taylor laughed, a high and lilting sound that reminded her of Eddie. Chrissy felt her heart lurch.

“So what do I have to do to summon this guy? Chant Ancev three times and spin in a circle?”

“Ancev?”

“Yeah, like Vecna backwards?”

“Ah, no. I was thinking of replicating the conditions that led to your initial vision.”

“You mean when I was feeling broken and lonely and like I had no hope left in the world?”

“...Yes? But I promise, me and Nancy will be there, and if it gets to be too much we'll put your headphones on and bring you back up. I don't want this thing to get you, Taylor. After what happened to Eddie-”

“I wish it was me.”

“What?”

“If what you're saying is true, and my brother had to die for you guys to figure this out, then I wish I had died first. He spent his whole life trying to protect me and lift me up, to make me feel like I was better than I was. He didn't deserve to die like that, all alone and in pain.”

Chrissy bit her lip, debating whether to tell Taylor her brother was still here in some form. She figured that she had given the girl enough to chew on for now. Instead, she took her hand between hers.

“Neither do you, Taylor. And I bet if he was here, he'd do everything in his power to make sure you were safe.”

Taylor nodded, willing herself not to cry in front of someone who she'd barely known a few days ago. When Chrissy pulled her into a hug, though, she found she couldn't hold it back anymore. She felt like Eddie must still be watching out for her somewhere, that somehow his joyous and kind nature had brought out the best in the people around her. Chrissy rubbed the girl's back and muttered soothing words, hoping like hell they could pull this thing off.

–

Friday morning dawned cold and clear, and Chrissy opened her eyes to see a thin layer of frost around the edges of her bedroom window. Eddie's arms were wrapped languidly around her torso, and apart from the chill emanating off of him, he seemed like any other teenager who'd managed to sneak into a girl's bedroom and make himself comfortable. She traced her finger along his stubbled jawline, humming to herself. When she told him their plans to rid Taylor of Vecna's influence, Eddie had insisted that they hold the ritual in Chrissy's bedroom where he could keep an eye on the proceedings. She figured it wasn't the worst idea, especially considering Laura would be out for the night at a gala to help disadvantaged people in some far-off country. She supposed there were worse ways her mother could be spending her time, and almost but not quite regretted being so harsh with her yesterday.

She remembered one of her many therapists saying something about establishing healthy boundaries and maternal enmeshment but she hadn't thought much of it at the time. Now that she had had time to process her loss and move past it, she knew the best thing for both of them was to get some distance and work on her own sense of self. Better late than never, Eddie had said, not realizing how much of an impact he had made on her in such a short time. She regretfully wriggled out of his grasp and started getting ready, not really minding if his eyes roved over her form as she changed into her school clothes.

“Mm. Where'd you go?”

“Sorry, I need to get moving. Want to avoid the mom machine before she wakes up if I can.”

“I don't think I have much time left.”

She stopped to turn and look at him, feeling like she'd just gulped an ice cold glass of water. He looked as solid and real as she'd ever seen him since he showed up unexpectedly in her bedroom, but there was a new sadness behind his eyes.

“What do you mean...how do you know?”

“I don't know. I just have this feeling, like something's calling me away. It's a voice in the back of my head, and the more I pay attention, the louder it gets.”

“Like Vecna?”

He shook his head fervently. “No, it's not bad or scary. It's like I've been playing out in the yard too long, and something's telling me it's time to come home. Like my mom used to do before she passed. Do you think...do you think I'll see her there, Chrissy?”

She moved swiftly towards him and pulled him into a deep embrace. Any hope she'd had of holding her composure were dashed as she sobbed violently into his neck.

“Hey, hey, come on. It's okay, really. I've gotten more than my fair share of time here.”

Chrissy shook her head, sending tears flying in all directions. “That's not true, Eddie. You didn't deserve this, none of it. I wish life had treated you better. I wish I had known you when I had the chance, so I could tell you every day how fucking amazing and talented and beautiful you are.”

Eddie said nothing but slid his hands up to caress her cheeks and wipe the beads of moisture away. After a long moment, Chrissy began to catch her breath, although she still couldn't seem to speak without choking up.

“I-I want you to know, Eddie...that you were loved, so deeply.” She sighed and swallowed and pressed on. “Your uncle, your sister, your friends, me-”

“You love me?”

She nodded with reckless abandon and showered his pale face with kisses, making him laugh and embrace her in a tight hug.

“I love you too. If I had a choice between an eternity of bliss and peace and staying in this room with you forever talking about stars and Tolkien, it would be a pretty fucking hard decision.”

“Can you stay until tonight at least? Taylor's going to need her big brother one more time.”

He nodded, biting his lip to keep from breaking down. “I'll be here. If it wasn't already a moot point, I'd die for that kid.”

“That's funny, she said she'd do the same for you.”

–

At 8:30 that night, Taylor shuffled nervously into Chrissy's room, followed by Nancy and Mike.

“Hey, I made some space on the floor for you to sit if it would help you feel grounded. Or you can sit on the bed, or in the beanbag...whichever you like.”

She moved her curtain of hair and smiled gratefully at Chrissy. The floor works, thanks.”

Mike gravitated to Chrissy's bedroom phone and began to dial out to California.

“Thanks for letting me use it, Chrissy. You, uh, might get a long-distance fee, but don't worry, I'll pay you back. My mom's been making me pay it out of my allowance ever since El moved.”

Yeah...no worries.” She was barely listening as her attention had gravitated to Eddie, who was sitting cross-legged at the head of the bed, unbeknownst to everyone but her. His eyes were fixed on Taylor, roving over her pale face with concern.

“God, Chris, she looks so tired. So tired and so sad.”

They had come to an agreement earlier not to interact directly when other people were around; instead, Chrissy lay her hand on the edge of the bed in what she hoped was a casual manner. He reached out gratefully, hungry for a comforting touch, and laced his fingers in hers.

“So should we, uh, get started here?” Taylor asked uneasily. The girl had chosen to sit cross-legged like Eddie, and the resemblance of the siblings almost made Chrissy lose her composure.

“I think so. Mike?”

“Yeah, we're good to go. She's ready, just say the word.”

“Okay. Taylor, you know what to do,” Nancy said firmly. “After this, we'll be out of the woods, and we can go do anything you want. See a movie, get ice cream...”

“I want to see my brother.”

Nancy gave Chrissy a warning look, then turned back to Taylor.

“Can you go into that a little more?”

“It's like I told Chrissy the other day. He was my favorite person in the world, the one who got me through everything. All the shit with our parents, moving in with my uncle and scrounging to get by. I mean, I love Wayne but he didn't ask for two half-grown kids to show up in his life out of nowhere. There are times, I can tell, when he would rather not deal with the two of us. Eddie made me feel like I was worth something, even though we got dealt such a shit hand. Even when I went to school with second-hand clothes and a free lunch coupon, he made it seem like there was more to me than just being another fucking poor kid. Now that he's gone...I honestly don't know if I want to keep going.”

Eddie started to sob, clutching his fist against his mouth. The pain in his eyes made Chrissy want to scream, to call the whole thing off and draw the girl into a deep hug. The fact that Eddie couldn't even call out to her seemed torturous. Taylor began to weep, tears streaking down her face as she gasped for breath. “I don't k-know if I believe in the afterlife, but if there's even a chance I can be with him, and with mom...God, why does life have to be like this? Why do we have to love people if they're just going to leave us in the end?”

Chrissy looked at Nancy, silently asking her for reassurance that this was the right thing. The girl gazed back at her, looking close to tears herself. Taylor gasped suddenly and jumped back, nearly bumping into Chrissy's legs. “It's here, it's...I can see it.”

“What do you see, Taylor?”

“It's a man, kind of. Or it...used to be? He's walking towards me.”

“Do you hear a grandfather clock?”

She nodded desperately. “Yes, and there are spiders crawling everywhere. He's almost here, oh god!”

Eddie groaned and grabbed fistfuls of his hair. “Chrissy, please!”

Nancy nodded firmly at Mike. “It's time, El! See if you can tap into her mind!”

“If?!” Eddie asked incredulously. “Shouldn't we have done a practice run or something?”

Taylor stopped crying then, stopped making any noise at all. Chrissy's blood ran cold as the girl's eyes flickered and went white, and she started to rise from the ground.

“Chrissy, grab her ankles!”

She dove and caught Taylor just in time, pulling her back down with as much force as she could.

“El? We're running out of time, can you find her?”

Nancy grabbed Taylor's other ankle and together they pulled until she was almost fully on the ground; then, suddenly, an unseen force pushed them both back and away from her.

Chrissy crumpled to the ground in shock and pain; she shook her head to see Taylor rising, rising even faster than before.

Oh god this is all my fault. I knew I'd be a fuckup

“She found her! She's in, you guys!”

“How fast can she beat this thing? We can't hold her down, Vecna pushed us away!”

“Chrissy, this isn't working, we have to do something!” Eddie yelled, launching himself out of the bed and looking up at his sister who had almost reached the ceiling.

“The Walkman was our failsafe, but we didn't know she was going to float!”

Eddie jumped to turn the radio on, praying that whatever was playing would snap Taylor out of it. Mike jumped back, startled, as it started playing Madonna.

“What the hell?” He reached to turn it off, but Chrissy shouted him down immediately. “Don't, Mike, it's her only chance!”

“What, Like a Prayer?”

“No, it needs to be a particular song.”

“Wait, this might work,” Eddie said as a new song faded in. He joined in with his own voice, clear and strong and full of feeling.

Highway run into the midnight sun

Wheels go 'round and 'round, you're on my mind

Restless hearts, sleep alone tonight

Sending all my love along the wire

Acting on instinct, Chrissy joined in, earning an appreciative look from Eddie.

Loving a music man ain't always what it's supposed to be

Oh, girl, you stand by me

I'm forever yours

Faithfully

The group looked up at Taylor, who still floated along the edge of the ceiling, although thankfully none of her limbs had been broken yet.

“El?” Mike said quietly into the receiver, not wanting to break the moment. “What's the status, you doing okay in there?”

Nancy, who had also joined in the song, looked at Chrissy proudly in a way that made her heart want to burst out of her chest. If they could just hold on for a little longer...

“Oh, fuck yeah! She got him guys, sent his ass flying!” Mike cheered.

That means...

Chrissy jumped into action just in time to catch Taylor as she fell suddenly, like a skydiver with no parachute. She thanked her lucky stars that she'd spent so much time on cheerleading stunts and knew how to catch someone midair. She stood the girl up and brushed her hair out of her tear-soaked face, eternally grateful that Taylor's brown eyes shone back at her.

“Hey, we did it! We got the bastard, he's gone!”

“I heard him.”

“Who, Vecna?”

“No, Eddie. I heard him singing that Journey song, is he here?”

Chrissy was taken aback and looked to Nancy for guidance.

“Chrissy.” Taylor spoke with more force than she'd ever heard from the girl. “Is my brother here, right now?”

She nodded, gulping down a lump in her throat. “Yes, he's here, I'm sorry-”

Taylor gasped and turned to look at Eddie, whose form had taken on an unearthly warm glow.

“Hey, kid.”

She sobbed his name and flew to him, holding him like she never wanted to let go.

“Fuck, Eddie, where have you been?”

“Oh, you know, here and there. Mostly here.”

She laughed and looked him up and down. “How-”

“I don't know, but it doesn't really matter. I don't have much time. I just wanted to say how fucking proud you make me, Taylor. You're worth so much more than you think, and if you ever start feeling like you want to throw it all away, consider the fact that I defied the very concept of mortality just to be here for you, at this very moment. That's how much I love you, you know.”

“Yeah well, you don't really need an excuse to laugh in god's face now, do you?”

“You know me too well.”

She held him tightly to her, biting her lip. “What am I gonna do without you?”

“Hey, someone's got to keep an eye on the old man. Not to mention these freaks.” He threw a wink at Chrissy.

Taylor beckoned Chrissy closer, eyes shining. “Thank you, Chrissy. You saved me, and you gave me the chance to say goodbye to my brother. Any time I think that it's not worth sticking around and that no one cares, I'll remember what you did for me today.”

She shook her head and placed a hand on Taylor's shoulder. “You saved yourself. You were so damn brave in there. Eddie's right when he says you're amazing.”

“Chrissy?” Eddie said, his voice thick. She turned to see him, almost completely enveloped in a golden light. His body, once so full of life and energy, was barely visible beneath the glow.

“No,” she said, taking his hand one last time. “Please...”

“Hey,” he said, looking into her eyes and smiling kindly. “You're not one of those pale little stars, you know. You're a whole fucking galaxy, Cunningham.”

She reached out to kiss him, and he wrapped her arms around her midsection; as he did so, the light overtook him and bathed the room momentarily. When Chrissy opened her eyes, the boy who had stood there was gone.

–

“Chrissy Cunningham, please report to the principal's office.”

The school intercom clicked to life and broke Chrissy from her daze; it was Monday afternoon, and she's barely slept over the weekend, her thoughts consumed with their victory over Vecna and the final loss of Eddie. She slid out of her seat and made her way to the office, her shoulders hunched; what now? She was startled to see a local patrolman sitting in the office, complete with a dark brown hat and loaded gun holster.

“Chrissy, this gentleman would like to have a word with you.”

“O-okay.”

“Thank you, sir, I can take it from here. Would you mind giving us a minute alone?”

The principal looked nonplussed but pasted a smile on his face. “Of course, I'll just be right outside the door.”

He closed the door to the office behind him but Chrissy could still see him peering through the small glass panel curiously.

“What's this about, sir?”

“Call me Clark, Chrissy. I wanted to ask you about a Jason Carver who attends this school. You're both seniors right? You have any classes together?”

“Not really, but we are- or we were friends, kind of.”

“Uh-huh. Any reason for the past tense on that?”

Chrissy had been afraid this would happen; Jason had probably spun the situation to his favor and sicced a local cop on her to scare her. She wondered if it was even worth telling the truth, but as the man's eyes bore into hers, she found she couldn't think of anything else to say.

“Well, the other day in the lunch room, he grabbed my arm hard enough to leave bruises and told me to mind my business.”

The man's eyes flicked to her upper arms, which she had tried and failed to cover with concealer.

“And what business was he referring to?”

Chrissy sighed, feeling like she was out of options. “Nancy Wheeler and I got to talking, and we thought something might have been weird about Eddie's death. Eddie Munson, you know. We went to talk to his uncle and his sister. That's all, I promise. We weren't trying to impede the investigation, or accuse anyone of anything-”

“Woah now, it's alright. So Jason got in your face about you and the Wheeler girl going to see Eddie's family, even though you didn't mention it to him, and you didn't even know how he know it.”

Chrissy nodded. “I guess so.”

“And he mention a...Devon Murphy or a Bryce Hartley to you?”

Chrissy furrowed her eyebrows curiously. “No...no he didn't.”

How does he know?

“Can I ask what this is about, sir? I didn't mean to cause any trouble or anything.” Liar.

The man sucked his teeth and looked Chrissy up and down. “Can I trust you to keep this to yourself, Chrissy?”

She nodded. “Yes, absolutely.”

“Jason Carver came to us over the weekend and accused Bryce and Devon of killing Eddie Munson in the woods on Saturday night. He said he was there, and tried to stop them, but they were too drunk and wouldn't listen. Which is funny, because a few hours later, they came to the station and accused him of the same thing.”

“So they turned on each other? What does that mean, what happens now?”

“Well, you and I both know that Carver's family is old money and they'll lawyer him up just as soon as they can. But something about that kid rubs me the wrong way, if I can be frank. I'm willing to bet that all three of those boys were involved in some capacity. What happens next is up to a jury of their peers.”

“I wish I could be on the jury.”

The man chuckled. “Something tells me you'd be a little biased. You mind heading to the police station after school and giving a statement on what Carver said to you? We may need to take some pictures of those bruises as well.”

“For sure. Thank you, sir.”

“You bet, missy. And remember, keep this to yourself for the time being.”

–

After attending the police station, Chrissy made her way to Eddie's trailer. She knocked but received no reply; suddenly worried, she began to hammer rapidly until Taylor appeared.

“Hey, sorry to bug you, you scared me!”

“Don't worry!” Taylor said, laughing. “Come in.”

“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” Wayne said, looking like he'd slept well for the first time in some time.

“You want a drink, Chris?”

“Oh yeah, water or whatever you have is fine.”

As Taylor bounced her way to the kitchen, Wayne turned to Chrissy.

“You know, I don't know what you kids have been doing with her this week, but she's bounced back like a spring rose. I just wanted to say I'm mighty grateful to you.”

“It's no problem, Wayne. Taylor's a good kid, you know. She reminds me of...of Eddie.”

“Did you know him well?”

“Not as much as I wish I had. But I don't know, it's like he still made an impact after he was gone, somehow.”

“That's my nephew, alright. No one could ever accuse the boy of not being memorable.”

Taylor handed Chrissy a glass of water and took a seat in the plush living room chair. “Wayne's teaching me James Taylor, you know.”

“Oh my god, really?”

“Mm-hm. He taught Eddie when he was, like, eleven, so I figured I was overdue.”

“Can you show me?”

“Chrissy, please, I've been playing for like a day.”

“I want to see!”

“Now girls, take it easy. Let the maestro demonstrate how it's done.” He pulled a guitar from behind the couch and sat down, resting it on his crossed thighs. He began to play, soft and sweet, as Taylor sang along in her high, clear voice.

Just yesterday morning, they let me know you were gone

Suzanne, the plans they made put an end to you

I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song

I just can't remember who to send it to

Chrissy hummed along, wishing that Eddie could see the impact he'd managed to leave behind in his young life. She knew that the people who had known him would eventually move on, better for having had him in their lives. She would keep growing and changing while he would remain in their hearts, the same brash, impulsive, creative, wonderful boy he'd always been. For now, she was happy to share in the love that remained.

I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend

But I always thought that I'd see you again

#stranger things #eddie munson #chrissy cunningham #chrissy x eddie #eddie my beloved

[thebluestcowboy]

My health insurance is literally the devil. it is impossible to find anyone that takes my insurance in my state. They have a shitty app that never works where you can search for in-network providers but *surprise!* it’s all out of date! None of these providers actually take my insurance!

And when I can finally find a provider who takes my insurance, I have a high deductible so my insurance doesn’t cover a single thing 🙃🙃🙃 And doctors are apparently too stupid to know this, so when I tell them I’m on a tight budget, they genuinely can’t comprehend it: “b-but…you have insurance…that means they’ll pay for everything?” because I guess doctors are just fucking clueless about how the healthcare field works??

This entire system is so fucked. If you’re in another country and you’re thinking “is healthcare in the US really that bad??” The answer is yes. It’s so fucking bad. I’m a mostly able-bodied middle class person and it’s still a fucking nightmare.

and the icing on the cake?? I can’t even call these companies out by name because they intersect with my job in a very real way in that I would get fired for saying anything specific

#like i’m trying to get help for myself and it’s just impossible

[skvaderarts]

Petrichor Chapter 9: Downpour

Chapter 9: Downpour

Note: Hi everyone! Hope you're having a good week so far and staying out of this frankly bullshit hot weather smh! Anyway, please enjoy this chapter and have an awesome day! I had to fight Google auto-correct tooth and nail today so sorry in advance.

(-~-)

It was midday now, and it looked like rain. Due to the dark, looming overcast overhead, it was difficult to see the sun above them, and as such, an accurate visual representation of the time of day was not readily available. But they all knew the time in one way or another, and they were in no rush either way. It was one of those situations where they had agreed that when they got there, they got there, and that was all there was to it.

They rounded a corner moments later, pulling onto the familiar street that V lived on. It seemed that unlike most of the city, the buildings on this street were intact. Most of the neighborhood was completely unscathed, in fact. Perhaps they're made of a different glass, or perhaps it was simply the blast radius. After all, these houses were on an entirely different side of town, and most of the damage had occurred closer to Dante's office which was in the total opposite direction geographically. It was still the same city, but an entirely different borough. 

But either way, at least the young summoner wasn't going to have to spend the entire evening putting plastic up to his windows like the occupants of the office probably were. Nico could only imagine how long the waiting list had to be at this point for window repair in this city. She wondered if there was some sort of citywide repair plan in place for something like this. After all, every window in an entire city couldn't be missing glass at the cusp of winter, now could it? And all this damage had been a result of a natural disaster. 

Actually… Did a demon attack count as a natural disaster? A supernatural disaster, perhaps? Was a supernatural disaster even something classified in an insurance book? She had never actually considered that before, and she wasn't sure, But she had her doubts. On the one hand, there was nothing natural about the existence of demons, as far as the average person was probably concerned. But on the other hand, places like Fortuna had been utterly leveled by demonic attacks, and there had been an immediate citywide effort to repair the damage and return to some state of normalcy. But to be fair, the people in Fortuna were less than typical in that regard. They had accepted the existence of demons and devils long before that disaster had occurred, so to them, it probably was just a natural state of affairs.  Demon attacks happened often enough on the island for it to just be considered a fact of life. An "act of God" as an insurance company would probably classify it. Did that have any standing on the mainland? 

"Hey, so do you think that a demon invasion counts as an act of God or whatever for insurance purposes?" Niko asked seemingly totally out of the blue, the young man with the short white hair in the back seat clearly surprised by the statement. He had no idea where this train of thought had come from all of a sudden since she had been keeping these thoughts to herself instead of speaking them out loud prior to asking the question, so he was both bewildered by its suddenness and confused by its actual contents at the same time. 

"Nico I… why the fuck would you think that I would know something like that? I mean…" Nero drifted off gradually as his confusion visibility transformed into actual consideration and deep coherent thought and he raised an eyebrow slightly, obviously considering the merits of The question presented. He then went silent for about a minute, seemingly still lingering on the idea, but not entirely sure where to go with his conclusion. And after what felt like ages, he simply sighed. "Shit, I don't know. You got me."

The mechanic laughed to herself for a second as she shook her head and shrugged, just as confused by the prospect as he was. Looks like it was something they were going to have to ask an actual insurance company about if they want anything besides a hypothetical answer. And she was willing to believe that if it was covered, that plan probably cost a bit extra. As often as demon attacks were happening these days, there was no way that any right-minded insurance company was going to cover something like that by default, at least not without a hefty upfront payment.

How in the world was Dante still in debt at this point? She was genuinely stumped. Clearly more was going on with him than she realized.

Pulling to a stop in front of V's front stoop, Nico narrowly missed the curb. There were no pulling parking spots on the street, only semi-diagonal parallel spots that pulled up to the curb, and although those weren't particularly difficult to maneuver into, they were sort of a pain for her to line up with a van. After all, it was a bit wide in comparison to most of the cars that were probably meant to park in these kinds of spots, and when she had first started driving this van, parking in accordance with parking laws wasn't exactly on her to-do list.

As soon as the van came to a full stop, Nero glanced down at his older brother before turning his attention to the side door of the van. He was still resting, having drifted off shortly after they had gotten to the vehicle and left the manor. He'd been getting progressively more tired as the day had gone on, and Nero was trying his best not to worry over him. It made sense that he would be exhausted, after all. He'd been badly injured just like the rest of them, and on top of that, he had been poisoned by the devil Prince during the fight. It was needless to say that he was going to need a bit of extra time to recuperate and probably a specialized treatment just for that aspect of his injuries. And if he was being completely honest, continuous car rides tended to put everyone to sleep, even those who enjoyed them. 

Right now it was a wait-and-see sort of situation in regards to his brother's health, and his father's health as well, for that matter. No one had any idea how this was going to affect them long-term, and contingency plans were being made in case the worst should happen, but at least as far as Nero was concerned, there was no logical reason why he shouldn't allow V to rest during the trip home. If he was this tired, then he clearly needed to. But now it was time for him to head into the house. Probably for the best, actually. He was sure that a bed was more comfortable than his shoulder, though he wasn't sure that V would agree with that sentiment considering how soundly he'd been sleeping this entire time. 

Neither potholes nor uneven pavement nor bumps in the road or sharp turns had stirred him from his deep slumber. He'd even slid forward slightly a few times only for Nero to grab his arm to keep him from hitting the floor. The most he had gotten in the form of a response was a deep exhale as though he had knocked the wind out of him a little when he bumped him in the chest in the process once, but he still hadn't woken up or shown any sign that he planned to just yet. In truth, it was actually quite endearing in a strange way. One of these days he would have to try the same with his brother and see if he tolerated it, if only to humor himself. He got the distinct feeling that V wouldn't mind if he took a nap on her shoulder, although his skinny shoulders probably wouldn't care for that idea. 

As if on cue, V yawned, a sound that threw off both Nero and Nico as they pivoted their heads from their respective positions in the front and back seats of the van to get a better look at him. V was still laying partially on Nero at that point, so he didn't have very far to look, but it was still good that Nico had already pulled into her temporary parking spot before she had decided to look backward, considering her driving style.

Reaching up to wipe the moisture that had just formed in his eyes along with the sleep that had settled there during his nap with the back of his left hand, the young summoner blinked slowly, tiredness heavy in his eyes. It took him a solid moment to realize that he was even in the van, let alone leaning on his brother's shoulder. He lingered there for a moment, simply looking at Nero before quietly pulling away, clearly unsure as to what he should say or do to make it clear that he had not meant to inconvenience him. He was still not quite as awake as he might seem, and as such, his brain wasn't working just yet. Well, it was working just enough to make him uncomfortable with his involuntary actions, but not enough for him to come to a meaningful solution.

Glancing out of the window without saying a word just yet, he quickly realized that they were outside of his home and he blinked rapidly, obviously more awake now than he had been a moment prior. One glance at the sky above them told him everything he needed to know. It was probably best that he head inside and that they be on their way, lest they end up getting caught in a storm. After all, they weren't going to be able to get to the island if it started to storm heavily outside, and then they would have to head all the way back to the manor and then double back the next day. He didn't want to keep them any longer than he had to. 

One of these days he was going to have to offer them gas money. Did the van even use gas? He wasn't entirely convinced that Nico hadn't switched the van over to some sort of demonic energy power generator at this point considering her talents… 

"It seems that we have arrived… thank you," V said as he stood up somewhat shakily, aware of the fact that he wasn't entirely steady on his feet at the moment, especially since he had just woken up. His balance was always a bit suspect when he first awakened for the day, and this little nap was going to be no different. But either way, he did want to get down the steps and to his front door without gravely injuring himself, so it was probably best that he slowed down a bit and took it one step at a time. "I do not wish to keep you. Thank you for the ride home, Nico."

As the young summoner stepped towards the now open van door that his brother was holding open for him, Nico waved goodbye to V. It was never any trouble for her to assist him, and his polite nature only made it less of a chore. She didn't honestly mind if they missed the ferry at this point. Maybe she could stay the night over at V's place and enjoy that wonderful fireplace that he had in his living room. The worst-case scenario was that they could just go and beg Vergil to open a portal for them if they got snowed in by a storm overnight, after all. They had a few options at their disposal.

Making their way over to the porch, Nero stayed just behind his brother but not close enough to him that he might bump into him should he stop. He wanted to be able to catch him if he lost his balance, but he wanted him to also have enough room to try and make his way up the stairs on his own. He was leaning on his cane quite heavily at the moment, but it was not as bad as back in Redgrave City when he had been unable to stand. The last thing he wanted to do was make V feel like he didn't think that he could take care of himself, especially in regards to walking up a flight of steps. After all, he had managed just fine before he had met any of them, though he wasn't sure if he had possessed the cane back then or not. But regardless, he was not helpless, and treating him as such was almost certainly extraordinarily degrading for him, even if at the moment it might be more accurate than either of them knew. But he didn't think that his brother was immature enough to allow his pride to stand in the way of his physical health. He knew how to ask for help when he needed it. He had done it before when he had asked for Nero to assist him during his faltering moments after the battle with Malphas. And he knew as such that his brother was there for him should he need him. Neither of them needed to say a thing.

"Are you sure you don't want me to hang around? We can just go back to Fortuna tomorrow." The man with the short white hair said as they came to a stop in front of the front door, V clearly slightly out of breath but not from the steps. He had never gated them just fine, much to his relief, but he wasn't sure that his brother was in the condition to be left alone in the house. He didn't want to come back and check on him and find him unconscious on the floor or anything like that. His exhaustion was more than physical at this point, and that much was clear.

"I think I'll manage. Don't let me stop you." V said almost breathlessly, clearly a bit out of it but otherwise all right. His balance was holding steady, and he didn't seem to be on the verge of passing out or anything, but he did seem as though he needed to sit down and regain his bearings. Perhaps he was simply having a vertigo episode? It was hard to say without asking him, but he did seem as though perhaps a good meal and a sit down might do him some good, preferably in front of a warm fire or under a nice blanket. And maybe even with some sort of warm drink? Maybe all of the above? After all, he had just awoken from a several-day coma essentially, even if it had been encouraged for his recovery. Laying down in one position and sleeping for that long probably did have its side effects.

… Or maybe Nero just wanted Kyrie to make him some hot chocolate like she always did in this sort of weather… It was probably that one.

"Alright. Call us if you need something, all right?" Nero said hesitantly, aware that he needed to give his brother the space that he required in order to feel comfortable. He didn't want to impose himself upon the young Sumner and make him feel as though he did not trust his judgment. At the end of the day, the only person who really truly knew how V felt was V, and he wasn't going to try to override him. It was getting later in the day anyhow, and they only had about an hour and a half worth of leeway before the ferry left for the night. There were far fewer crossings available given the circumstances. After a certain time, the boats were being repurposed for other tasks that were more important. Not many people were going to and from the island as it was to begin with, and using those same ships to transport materials to areas that needed repairs was an understandable usage of what would otherwise have been mostly idle ships. "I mean that, V. I'll come back if you need me. I'm never too far away for that."

V nodded politely, a small tired smile upon his face. He felt a sensation similar to butterflies in his stomach at his brother's kind words. He appreciated Nero's obvious concern for him, but the last thing he wanted to do was to hold them up from their trip or continue to cause them to worry about him. They had a good hour's worth of driving to do just to get to the pier from here with delays and construction taken into consideration, and then who knew how long it was going to take for them to scope out the island. Should he need assistance, it was probably best that he contact Lady and Trish or perhaps Dante and Vergil. At least They wouldn't have to charge across an entire coastline to get to him. "I shall. Thank you."

For the second that Nero turned away from his brother and back towards the van, a flash of lightning overhead lit up the entire sky before a prolonged boom of thunder shook the entire neighborhood, rattling some of the nearby windows from the sheer force of its presence. Nico opened the door to the van and stuck her head out, looking up at the sky in surprise as she beheld a second flash of lightning. And before she could speak a word, a large drop of water hit her square in the face before several more drops equally as large began to splatter on the van's roof and the pavement out front of the house. It went from a few droplets at first to what felt like a torrent, speeding up rapidly in its force and pace before Nico slammed the door shut, clearly not in the mood to be soaked.

V stared at the sky for a moment, unbothered by the cold rain. He allowed the water to simply soak him as he exhaled deeply, feeling the chill of his breath escape his lungs. The cold water felt good against his skin. It was refreshing, to say the least. And besides, he could always just go inside of his home and warm up again. And that was probably a good idea considering that he could feel the temperature beginning to drop already. If this sudden change in weather was anything to go by, then the ferries at the dock certainly weren't going to be running for the rest of the day. It looked as though he might have guests for the evening, and he couldn't say with any honesty that that bothered him.

"Will the two of you be staying for the evening?" He said with a tent of humor to his voice, already sure he knew the answer. There was no way that anyone with any right mind was going to drive anywhere with the weather taking a turn like this. If it got a few degrees colder than it was now this was going to turn into snow. It was already soon to be ice-like, a sort of frozen rain threatening to become hail. And yet no intentions of being outside for that. Water was fine, but droplets of sharp ice certainly weren't. Not unless they were icicles hanging from the overhang of his porch that he could adore in quiet glee. He truly did love the winter, but he didn't want to be out in it exposed and wet with no coat. "I believe I might be able to find room for you."

Nero chuckled to himself under his breath, giving V a sort of playful "go fuck yourself" look as the two of them simply laughed at the ridiculousness of the situation. It seemed that they had all noticed that the weather might change like this, and although they hadn't expected it to happen so suddenly, there was nothing they could do about it. Fortuna was going to have to wait until tomorrow. They could drop by the office and ask Vergil if he could lend them a hand, or perhaps by then it would be appropriate for them to simply take the ferry. But either way, it did look like they were going to be staying over.

"Yeah, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that we probably are," Nero said as he shook his head, gesturing for Nico to abandon the van and head over to the front porch. Moments later, the door opened and she jumped out with a piece of some sort of plastic over her head, running over to the door. He doubted that she was concerned about her hair or her clothes, but it did seem like it might be a bit too cold for her at the moment. She spent her days over hot tools. It was no surprise that the last thing she wanted was to be soaked with ice water.

As the young mechanist made her way onto the porch, V unlocked the door and pushed it open with one smooth motion, allowing her to go straight in undeterred, unconcerned with her getting water on the floor. He was however concerned that she might slip and fall on the marble floors. Water and the stone never being a winning combination unless the competition was falling and breaking several bones.

"I would be wary of the-"

But before V could finish speaking, Nico's feet hit the stone floor and she practically went flying into the staircase on the other side of the entrance, her back vertical with the floor for a month before she made impact with the ground and slid at high speed across the room before coming to a sudden stop. Both Nero and V cut a glimpse of what had happened, and they heard the corresponding crash and her groans of discomfort as she clearly had the wind knocked out of her, but neither of them was willing to actually look into the house. Instead, they looked at one another, cringing in obvious discomfort at what they knew she'd probably just done to herself. It was unlikely that she was gravely injured in any way, but one thing was for sure: She was going to need to put some ice on that.

"... We should probably see if she's still alive," V said as he clenched his teeth, biting the inside of his lower lip slightly. It seemed that at least one of them today was destined to trip and fall, and although he was glad it hadn't been him, he still felt nothing but pity for Nico. He knew she'd probably been through worse and then some, but it still probably smarted something awful. It was best that they make sure she didn't need medical attention. After all, stairs could be dangerous. He certainly knew that firsthand… 

Nero leaned to the side and peered into the room, wincing audibly as he caught a glimpse of her and shook his head, turning his attention quickly back to his older brother. "Yeah, I'm going to have to agree with you again. Sounds like a good idea. Shit."

(-~-)

This was a fun little chapter! I had a good time writing it today, and I'm looking forward to Friday's chapters, too! Google auto-correct is my personal hell. It autocorrected “breathlessly” to “breakfastly.” It loves to change “V” to “the” and “Nero” to “Neuro” and don't even get me started with the things it auto corrects “Sirrus” to… I have no words. If you see weird spelling errors, google probably went through and decided that it's braindead AI knows what I’m saying better than I do. I tried my best, but it’s hard fighting a persistent and idiotic AI. But then again anyone who has ever been on Youtube before knows how that can be. I'll see you all on Friday!

#Petrichor #V #Nero #Nico #Vitale #DMC #DMCV #DMC5 #Devil May Cry #Devil May Cry 5 #Devil May Cry V #My Post Devil May Cry 5 AU #DMC 5 AU #Post DMC5 #Post DMCV #My Post Devil May Cry 5 Fan Fic #My Post DMC AU #My Post DMCV AU #OCs

[pixiedustandbluebutterflies]

Have I ever expressed on this platform just how much I fucking hate pharmacists and pharmacies?

#ableism #chronic illness #They're just so fucking ARROGANT and every single one of them is on some sort of fucking power trip #i get out you didn't have what it takes to be a doctor so you settled for this instead #like stop taking it out on those of us that just need our fucking meds #pharmacies and insurance companies are the actual devil

[sixofpomegranates]

Rain in California - Act 1 - California

���Mini Series “Rain in California” Act 1 - Part 1 - California🥀

✨My Main Masterlist✨ | 18+ | AO3 | Wattpad

🥀Soundtrack🥀 | ✨Aestethic Trailer✨ |  🥀Masterlist🥀 | Words: 9.4k

A/N: The music used in this story is not owned by me (obviously) & I used it in the same style that 'Rock of ages' and 'Mamma Mia' used songs. I gave them a different meaning and context. The meaning and context are NOT representing the one that the ORIGINAL ARTIST had.

TW: ANGST, mention of loss/death/addiction/sobriety/murder, suicidal thoughts/tendencies, depression, addiction, substance abuse, drugs, alcohol, ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP, stalking, death by overdose, mentions of OD, passive aggressiveness, arguing,

Songs in this Chapter: La di die – Nessa Berrett Going to Hell | My Medicine | Heaven Knows – The Pretty Reckless

“Spence?”

 Spencer looked up from his book.

Oh, so now he was allowed to talk with them about the case.

Since the briefing they hadn’t talked to him about anything. Spencer had to beg them, to let him work on this case.

He had really felt left out and why?

Because the stalking victim was a famous Rockstar with addiction issues. Spencer was hurt about his team not wanting him to be on the case because of this. Yes, he had struggled with addiction in the past, but he had been clean for over ten years now.

Was this unfair treatment…this distrust in his sobriety, ever going to stop?

It wasn’t like they had cared much about it when Emily had faked her death or when Maeve died, but this, for them, looked like a too high risk? Because there was a pretty girl involved?

He tried his best not to sound passive aggressive when responding.

 “Yeah, JJ?”, with success.

“I asked if everything´s okay.”

“Sure. Why should anything be wrong?”, the blonde shrugged a little, an apologetic look on her face.

“Well the case-“ “It´s just a stalking case. Nothing we haven’t already seen. I actually wonder why we even need to come. The stalker isn’t aggressive and hasn´t hurt anybody. Right now he´s just importunate. The police should be able to catch this unsub themselves.”, he had accidently let a little of his passive aggressiveness slip and Emily, who was sitting next to JJ, looked at him.

“The record label convinced the police to contact us. They seem worried about their artist.”

“From what I know…this girl can take care of herself.”, Luke snickered, earning himself a ‘Come on, really?’-look from Emily. “Sorry, but have you seen or listened to her music? She could probably beat Reid in a fist fight.”

“Just because she´s making rock music, doesn’t mean she´s tough. But we should talk a little about the case, Reid if you ever feel unco-“, he quickly interrupted her with a snappy tone.

“Why, because she´s an addict? I don’t care about that.”, Emily lifted her hands in a calming manner.

“Okay, jeez. Just the way you´re on edge, since the briefing, doesn’t look like you are okay.”, Spencer took a deep breath, trying to talk calmer this time, now almost pleading in tone.

“I-I know. But I´m clean since was twenty-six. I never touched anything again and I don’t feel the need to. I even regulate my alcohol intake, never drinking more than a beer, maybe two glasses of whiskey. Which means, that statistically all of you are at a higher risk, of becoming addicted, during this case, then I am. You guys need to trust me.”, the dark haired woman sighed and nodded.

“You´re right. I´m- We´re just worried. You´re our friend, Spencer.”, she handed him a file. “Just promise me you talk to one of us, if something changes.”

 He nodded opening the file. A picture of [y/n] looked at him. Dark heavy make-up, dark clothing and jet black hair with colorful streaks.

His younger self would´ve been as attracted as terrified of her.

He flipped through the pages. [y/n] [y/l/n]. Twenty-six years old. Stalker since approximately two years. Nothing extremely outstanding for a stalking case…which was kinda outstanding. No letters, no calls, no pictures, no break in, no threats…sometimes she would get random, expensive present delivered to her mansion, but that was it. Given that she was famous, this presents did not even have to be from a stalker.

 “Are we sure there´s even is a stalker?”, Spencer frowned at his own question, Emily shrugged as a response.

“According to the manager, Philip Schuyler, since the first time she played his concerns down, he gets these calls of a man asking for [y/n] and how she is doing. The label didn’t take it serious after he told them, but then the unsub stole the last finished album from [y/n]´s band ‘Shot Monarch’, before it could get released and distributed, also erasing every digitally existing copy. He then called the manager and send the owner of the record label a letter; typed on a computer, no fingerprints; stating that he wanted to be taken serious. Later [y/n] got the USB, containing all her songs, with a dozen white lilies, her favorite, back per mail with an apology letter; stating that she had done nothing wrong and didn’t need to worry, since he could never harm her or her carrier. That´s when the label pushed the police to contact us.”

“Because they are worried about the music…not the woman.”, JJ sighed, shaking her head.

“Well, that´s the industry. At least her manager is worried. Police states that he got himself a gun license after that and tries to be everywhere [y/n] is.”, Luke added.

“Something about that is off.”, Spencer whispered, rubbing his stubbles, before looking at JJ, Emily and Luke again. “There is nothing that indicates a stalker, but every time somebody doubts his existence, he does something noticeable. I know she is famous and that comes with the stigma of having crazed fans as stalkers, but most stalking in general is committed by someone known to the victim, such as an ex-partner or acquaintance. We should check that out.”, JJ nodded.

“It would also be smart if one of us stays by her site.”, Luke quickly raised his hand.

“I volunteer. I- Like- Really! If necessary I´ll sleep in the SUV.”, Emily raised an eyebrow.

“Can it be that you´re a fan? I heard you and Penelope freak out a little over the case earlier.”, a shy smirk appeared on his lips.

“‘Shot Monarch’ has really good music. Since my road trip a year ago, I love their stuff. Penelope actually tol-”, Spencer interrupted him determined.

“I´ll do it.”, Emily quickly shook her head.

“Reid, no.” “Why not?”, his voice got high, making him quickly cleared his throat. “Because-“ “Because she is taking drugs. Do you trust me that little, Emily?”, Spencer snapped at her and she leaned back into her seat. Sure the others from the team were older than him, but he was in his late thirties, and yet was treated like a child.

 “Fine. If you think you can handle it, do it. But stop being so sassy, I hate that.”, Emily looked at look in defeat. “Luke tell him what you know about [y/n] and the band.”, he nodded pulling out his phone.

“Okay so, [y/n] is the lead singer of ‘Shot Monarch’. She´s from a small town in Ohio and came to LA when she was eighteen, to become a singer after going viral. They are a band since five years, the name never really got explained by them, but it has something to do with the butterfly; at least that’s a fan theory I now from Penelope. Plus it makes sense, because [y/n] has a tattoo of one on the back of her hand.”, Luke flipped through some pictures of older man, reminding Spencer of bikers and insurance agents at the same time. Like middle-aged fathers that liked rock but still had a nine-to-five job.

“Hank, the guitarist, was a lawyer before and in a cover band with his high school friends Tom, the bassist, who worked for an insurance company, and Leroy, the drummer, who was history teacher and is also married to Hank. They met [y/n] at an open mic night and even though she´s twenty-six and they are in their late forties, early fifties, they got along so well, that they became a band. That´s ‘Going to Hell’ by the way. One of the more controversial songs.”, Luke pressed play on the video and already moved the lips to the lyrics.

  “Father did you miss me,

Been locked up a while.

I got caught for what I did but took it all in style.

Laid to rest all my confessions I gave way back when.

Now I'm versed in so much worse,

So I am back again, and he said

For the lives that I take, I'm going to hell!

For the love that I make, I'm going to hell!

Gettin' heavy with the devil, you can hear the wedding bells.”

  “The guitar you´re hearing is a classic Hank. That guy knows what he´s doing.”, Luke added, seemingly in his element, reminding Spencer a lot of Garcia when she was excited.

 Spencer nodded and watched the music video, the overall theme was dark and heavy. [y/n] voice was nice, a little smoky and strong, but everything just sounded so angry. Not really his style, although he preferred older, classical music in general over the ‘normal’ things ‘normal’ people liked. [y/n] wore tightfitting latex, while the men from her band mostly just wore black jeans and shirts, sometimes leather jackets. At one time, she was surrounded by snakes, only wearing white lingerie. She was really pretty, red lipstick making her look like a biting version of Snow White. Like a princess that would rather save herself, becoming the villain along the way, before letting someone else save her.

  “Father did you miss me,

Don't ask me where I've been.

You know I know, yes, I've been told I redefine a sin.

I don't know what's driving me to put this in my head.

Maybe I wish I could die, maybe I am dead!

And he said

For the lives that I fake, I'm going to hell!

For the vows that I break, I'm going to hell!

For the ways that I hurt, when I'm hiking up my skirt.

I am sitting on a throne while they're buried in the dirt.

For the man that I hate, I'm going to hell!

Gettin' heavy with the devil, you can hear the wedding bells.”

  The lyrics and symbolistic in the video mocked parts of the Christian belief system. Such as the bite Eve had taken from the apple, showing [y/n] taking a bite from the forbitten fruit. The last supper and the crucifixion were shown with a dark twist too. This could be a hint of rebellion, to cope with religious trauma, or simply be a way to cause controversy.

“Please forgive me father,

I didn't mean to bother you.

The devil's in me father.

He's inside of everything I do.

For the lives that I take, I'm going to hell!

For the laws that I break, I'm going to hell!

For the love that I hate, I'm going to hell!

For the lies that I make, I'm going to hell!

For the way I condescend and never lend a hand.

My arrogance is making this head buried in the sand.

For the souls I forsake, I'm going to hell!

Gettin' married to the devil, you can hear the wedding bells.”

As the video ended Luke took his phone and put it back into his pocket.

“Their earlier stuff had a little more emotion to it, was about heartbreak, suffering and made you feel. This is one of the more recent ones and you can hear that it´s now mostly just stuff like sex, drugs and anger. Most people think that´s because [y/n] writes all of their music and she´s…seen better days…”, Luke sighed, trying to make it sound as polite as possible.

“Because she started taking drugs?”, Spencer raised his eyebrows, but Luke shook his head. “Oh, no. She, according to many rumors and an interview with her father, has taken drugs since she was a teen. But at this point…she just simply seems to have given up, having chosen to not go deeper with her songs anymore. I mean, they still slap. They just don’t slap your heart anymore, you know?”

“Not so nice, when your father talks to the press about your addiction. Could her father be a suspect?”, JJ asked, making Luke shrug and shake his head at the same time.

“Most likely not. He said in that interview that he wishes her the best, but doesn’t want to speak to her again.”, Emily mouthed a silent ‘ouch’, the whole talk about the rockstars private life making Spencer think.

“Maybe that´s part why she´s taking drugs? Often people use them to cope with-“, Emily interrupted him, profiling [y/n] and her substance abuse, quickly.

“Reid. We´re not going there to fix her, just the stalking situation.”, he nodded, knowing that he had a savior complex, always trying to help and save everybody.

“Exes?”, Spencer asked and Luke shook his head.

“Just one is known, Dean Lennox, singer, now married with kids. He and [y/n] were together for two years and according to him it was toxic. Like, always fighting, jealousy, distrust, fear of being left but she still didn’t want him close at the same time, lying. After their last breakup, he told a gossip magazine, he just couldn’t watch her destroy herself anymore. She never commented on it.”, JJ looked at Spencer worried.

“She seems like a handful, are you sure you can handle her alone?”, he chuckled while nodding.

“I´ve been through worse. How hard can it be to watch a twenty-six year old? When she, like Luke said, really doesn’t want anyone close, I´ll just sit on her couch and let her do her thing.”

*****

After landing in Los Angeles and checking into their hotel, the team drove to police station. There already waited a massage for them with an address. It was from the manager, he wrote that he was terribly sorry, but they needed to come to the recording studio, since the band was on a tight schedule all morning. Luke had tried his best, but Spencer could see his excitement through his tough-guy-façade. He, JJ, Luke and Emily took one of the SUV´s and drove to the address.

 The building they entered was large and with great security. Expensive, white marble flooring in the entire entrance hall. They showed their batches to the lady at the front desk and the security, she called somebody and soon a short, pudgy man, dressed in a designer suit walked out of the elevator and up to them. He smiled at them friendly and shook everyone’s hand.

 “Ah, the agents. I am so glad that you´re here. Hi. Hello. I´m Philip Schuyler, the manager of ‘Shot Monarch’.”, Emily shook his hand and pointed at the team.

“Nice to meet you. I´m unit chief SSA Prentiss, those are SSA Jareau, Alvez and that´s Dr. Spencer Reid. He will take on the job as bodyguard for Miss [y/l/n].”, the man scratched his brown hair, avoiding the bald spot on top.

“Yes, uhm, please just call her [y/n]. She really dislikes being called Miss [y/l/n]. We also already have police and security around her house, so I don’t know how important a personal bodyguard is. I really want this case solved and it would be terrible if we would hinder your work.”, Spencer lifted a finger.

“Actually, it would be better if I´m able to stay close to [y/n]. Normal police and security could probably oversee minor details about the stalker, Mr. Schuyler.”, the man waved off.

“Please, Mr. Schuyler was my father. Philip is completely fine. Everybody calls me that.”, he started walking to the elevator and the agents followed him. “Right now the band´s having a little break. After that, we need to record one more song for the ‘live in the studio’-version of their new album, that just came out. Are you familiar with their music?”, they got into the elevator and Luke already nodded.

“Yeah. Really great. Big fan.”, Emily lifted her hand, silencing Luke.

“I´m sorry. If that´s a problem we can-“, Philip laughed, interrupting her.

“Oh, no, no. [y/n] will love that. She likes meeting fans and showing off her music.”

 They got out of the elevator, walked through the little hallway and entered the large double door in front of them. There was the recording studio. A lot of technical things, Spencer didn’t know much of, and a large glass wall in front of it, showing another room.

 The recording room was large, with a black leather couch and beanbags in it and nice, warm, wooden flooring. A drum set was placed on an vintage looking, red carpet and the overall lighting was warm and inviting as well. The door to the room was open and he could hear the three men, from the band, talking and laughing inside.

 “Guys, can you come out for a bit?”, Philip asked them and they looked up, walking up to them. “Okay, uhm, guys, those are the agents from the FBI. You know? The once coming because of [y/n]´s stalker.”, the largest man, a head taller than Spencer, smiled through his long grey beard that contrasted his bald head.

“Nice to meet you then, I´m Hank. That my husband Leroy,”, they shook hands with the dark skinned, skinny man, who in contrast to his husband was cleanshaven, with short black hair and glasses, “and that´s our friend Tom.”, the chubby, white, blond waved at them friendly.

“Why would like to talk with each of you individually, later at the police station, if that is possible.”, Emily said before introducing her team again, also mentioning Spencer´s duty as bodyguard. Leroy grimaced his face.

“Uh, [y/n] will hate that. The girl does not like being babysat.” “I´m not going to babysit her.”, Spencer answered, making Leroy chuckle. “That´s not how she will see it though.”, Hank sighed and put a hand on Spencer´s shoulder.

“Our girl is going through a lot right now. So it would be nice of you, to not take everything she´s saying personally, okay?”

“Personally?”

 Spencer raised his eyebrows. He desperately hoped [y/n] wouldn’t be a bitch the entire time, since he couldn’t promise to not give her a piece of his mind, if so.

“[y/n]´s a little belligerent…Easy to get triggered and then she blows up like a bomb.”, Tom said and JJ cocked her head. “Is the stalking getting at her?”, Leroy shook his head. “Not really. But her mother died a few months ago and since then…little rough patch. She´ll get better. We all hit rock bottom once.”

“Is she going to therapy?”, Emily asked straight forward, making Tom, the chubby one chuckle. “Not since she hit the last therapist a few years ago. We paid his medical expenses and he was nice enough to not sue her. But we are here to help her, once she´s ready to let us.” “Must be exhausting, for you.”, JJ said empathetic and all the men waved off.

“Because of the drugs? No, it´s not that bad. She´ll collect herself. I have seven kids. Four of them are going through puberty right now. Phil has a toddler and Leroy and Hank have three rescue dogs and a couple of snakes. We can handle her.”, Tom laughed and the rest of the men started too.

“And that little stalker…Imma just say, I´m gonna rip him a new one, should I ever get the chance of meeting him. Counts for all of us.”, Hank added with everyone nodding in agreement.

“[y/n]´s a really nice girl and she´s been through a lot. If you´re nice to her, chances are high she´ll warm up to you and you won´t have any problems.”, Tom said to Spencer making him nod.

“And if she doesn’t?”, the tall doctor didn’t get an answer and just witnessed the rockers share a look.

 Nice girl. Drug issues not so bad. Be nice and maybe she´s nice to you. For Spencer all of that sounded like he would have to walk around on eggshells, while she would blast through walls like a wrecking ball. The manager, Philip, checked his watch and looked around.

 “So, where´s [y/n]? One more song and we´re done. Would be great not to hold up the investigation for too long.”

“She went to the toilet thirty minutes ago. We just ate our sandwiches. She said she wasn’t hungry.”, Leroy answered and at the same moment [y/n] walked in.

 Spencer looked at her and for a moment forgot how to breathe. Short, high waisted, leather skirt, low cut, tank top and biker boots, all black, rounded off with fishnet stockings.  [y/n] looked like she had climbed out of a teenagers wet dream. The perfect, little goth-girlfriend. She stretched a little and Philip looked at her.

 “Bonjour, Philly.”, she said with a sassy undertone, while walking up to him and leaning on his shoulder. He was the same high as her, which wasn’t really tall, about 5,4, if Spencer had to guess.

“Hey, where were you?”, the pudgy man asked her.

“Took a nap in my car.”, she booped his nose and gave him a sheepish little smile. Spencer knew she was high. In fact the whole room knew it.

“You drove here?”, Tom asked shocked and [y/n] grinned sarcastically.

“I guess so, else somebody explain to me why my car´s here.”, Phillip patted her shoulder, looking worried as she took four pills out of an orange pillbox from her bag. He gave her a glass of water and she swallowed them. The men from her band looked at her concerned, making her give them a pearly white smile.

“Headache.”, she explained and they only nodded. Spencer couldn’t help but think, that she wasn’t having a headache and even if she had, it was probably a withdrawal symptom.

“You know that I don’t want you to drive when you´re…”, her manager looked at the agents and stopped talking, making her look at them as well.

“What? Why´d you stop talking? That the fun police?”, she started giggling at her own joke, making the band chuckle, since she clearly didn’t know how accurate she was with her joke.

“That´s the FBI, Princess.”, Hank told her and she made a fake shocked face and then laughed again.

“Officer- No wait, agents, right? I swear I did nothing wrong. Weed´s legal in Cali.”

 The team shared some looks and Spencer couldn’t help but roll his eyes. [y/n] was not just on weed. Most definitely not just on weed.

 “They are here because of your stalker.”, Philip explained and she shrugged almost disappointed.

“Oh, that guy. Well, then hello. Nice to meet you. I´m [y/n].”

 She shook hands with JJ and Emily as they introduced themselves. Luke couldn’t help but breathe in sharply, as he shook her hand and almost choked on his own spit as an aftereffect. She started patting his back with wide opened eyes.

 “Shit, you okay? Asthma?”, [y/n] reached into her black, designer handbag and gave him a bottle with clear liquid. Luke took a sip, quickly grimaced his face and began coughing harder.

“Vodka.”, he stated through his coughing. [y/n] quickly took the bottle from him and took a sip too, without flinching. She then started cracking up at her mistake.

“Whoops. Mixed up the bottles, the other´s probably in my car. Philly, can you bring him…?”, Philip nodded and gave Luke a fresh water bottle from the mini fridge.

 Wow. Vodka hidden in a water bottle. Spencer licked his lips, taking in the view of her bandmates looking at each other. ‘Not that bad’ looked different. ‘Not that bad’ would not have her sleeping in her car, midday, with a bottle of ‘water’ and coming back high as a kite. Luke, by now, had stopped coughing and [y/n] stepped away from him again.

 “You good?”, she asked him, watching him wipe away his tears.

“Y-Yeah. Sorry.”, the black haired girl waved him off.

“Nah, don’t worry. I had asthma till I was twelve.”, he shook his head.

“I- I- No asthma. Just a really big fan.”, she started laughing again and although the light was dimmed, Reid could clearly see Luke´s cheeks turning red.

“Oh, that´s cute. But ‘Take My Breath Away’ is by Berlin.”, that sentence actually made the whole room laugh except for Spencer, who didn’t understand the reference. “What´s your name?”

“Luke Alvez.”, she shook his hand again, this time he didn’t almost choke.

“Well, nice to meet you, Luke. What´s your favorite song of ours?”

“25, no doubt. Really amazing. Like a James Bond song.”, the bandmates chuckled.

“We said that too.”, Leroy snickered, patting Luke´s shoulder and [y/n] nodded.

“It´s also my favorite. Excited to hear one of the new songs?”, Luke nodded excited and she turned her head to Spencer. “We both don’t know each other yet. Hi, I´m [y/n] and you are?”

 She sounded quite collected. Clearly high, but able to think straight if necessary. [y/n] must´ve been doing this for a while now, seeming to have figured out, how much she could handle while working. Spencer had been at that point too once. You wanted to do your work and be good at it, but needed to be high, to make it through the day. So you just tried over a period of time, bit by bit, how much you were able to take before doing a shitty job. ‘Not that bad’ didn’t make you figuring out a system to be high all the time.

 “Dr. Spencer Reid.”, he shook her hand.

“Dr. Reid will be your bodyguard, [y/n].”, Philip explained and quickly earned an angry look, as she let go of Spencer´s hand instantly.

“What? I don’t need a bodyguard, we talked about this.”, she hissed at her manager, but then started laughing after looking Spencer up and down. “And then that guy?”, Philip nodded as she rolled her eyes at him. ‘Do not take it personally’, Spencer told himself.

“I am more than capable of protecting you.”, he stated as friendly as possible, making her giggle.

“From what? A difficult math question?”

 [y/n] mocking tone started to piss him off, but as Spencer felt Emily´s look on him, he played it cool. After all, he had to proof himself able to handle her.

 “Your stalker.”, he corrected her and she licked her lips, pulling out a pack of cigarettes, looking at Luke.

“Since you don’t have asthma, would you mind if I…?”, Luke shook his head and she smiled. “Nice.”, she looked back at Spencer, at his gun. “Philip has a gun too.” “But Philip isn’t an FBI agent.”, Hank told her, making her shake her head in protest, like a little child.

“That´s ridiculous. And all of that just because a stranger sends me stuff, people send me stuff all the time.”

“You should be more worried about this guy.”, Leroy said and Tom nodded in agreement. “Yeah, what if he´s dangerous?”

“What´s the worst that could happen, like honestly, Doctor?”, she cocked her head at Spencer, looking up at him with an almost flirty smile.

“He could kill you.”, he gave back objectively, making the rockers obviously worried. “Geez. You make that sound like it´s a bad thing.”, she snickered and looked over to Luke. “Luke, wanna hear some music?”, he nodded.

“It would be an honor.”, his sentence made her giggle as she walked past him.

“You´re really cute.”

 [y/n] walked into the recording room, Tom, Leroy and Hank following her. She put on her headphones and lit a cigarette, putting the package on the little table next to her mic. Philip closed the door and started pushing some buttons on the sound mixer in front of him. JJ whistled impressed.

 “You do the technical stuff too?”, he nodded, chuckling.

“Since the stalking started, I try having as little people near [y/n] as possible. Thought it might just be a little crush from a weirdo and when he doesn’t get to see her, he gets over it.” “We need a list of the people that worked here though.”, Emily told him and he nodded.

“Of course.”, then he pushed a button and started talking into his microphone. “You guys, ready? Last song. ‘My Medicine’, then we can go home.”

 They all approved of his words and started to playing. [y/n] relighting her cigarette and clearing her throat. Spencer couldn’t tell if that was her simply not caring or doing it for the feeling of the song. However, it seemed to fit the style.

“Somebody mixed my medicine

Somebody mixed my medicine”

“I love this already.”, Luke whispered and JJ chuckled.

“You haven’t even heard anything yet.”, she snickered.

“Doesn’t matter, the feeling is there.”, he lifted his arms, showing her his goosebumps.

“Well you hurt where you sleep and you sleep where you lie

Now you're in deep and now you're gonna cry

Got a woman to your left

And a boy to your right

You start to sweat so

Hold me tight 'cause

Somebody mixed my medicine

I don't know what I'm on

Somebody mixed my medicine

Now baby it’s all gone

Somebody mixed my medicine

And somebody's in my head again

And somebody mixed my medicine again, again”

Spencer watched [y/n] starting to move to the rhythm, swaying her hips and tapping her left foot to the beat, then looked to Philip pressing some buttons.

 “She´s gonna be happy with that one.”, he whispered almost to himself and the next time Spencer looked at the band again, it almost felt like she was attentionally singing in his direction.

“Well I drink what you leak and I smoke what you sigh

See you cross the room with that look in your eye

Got a man to his left and a girl to his right

You start to sweat so

Hold me tight 'cause

Somebody mixed my medicine

I don't know what I'm on

Somebody mixed my medicine

Now baby it’s all gone

Somebody mixed my medicine

Somebody's in my head again

And somebody mixed my medicine again, again”

She started moving her head in a way that made her long black hair fall in her face, framing her features almost delicately. While Spencer starred and earned some grins from [y/n], he could hear Luke whisper with Emily, who actually seemed to like the music too.

“There's a tiger in the room and a baby in the closet”

The room laughed and Spencer looked confused, having JJ tell him, that it was a movie reference. Sometime he felt like an alien, having such simple references fly over his head. Star Trek or Book references would´ve been easier for him…although he still didn’t know what that ‘Twilight’ book was Penelope and JJ talked about a couple of times. Or that other book all the women had talked about in their break….what was it called, ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’? They had told him it was a romance novel, so he just assumed it was like ‘Pride and Prejudice’ by Jane Austen.

“Pour another drink mom I don't even want it

Then I turn around and think I see someone that looks like you”

Philip pressed some buttons again, [y/n] now harmonizing with herself.

“Well you hurt where you sleep and you sleep where you lie

Now you're in deep and now you're gonna cry

Got a woman to your left

And a boy to your right

You start to sweat so

Hold me tight 'cause

Somebody mixed my medicine

I don't know what I'm on

Somebody mixed my medicine

Now baby it’s all gone

Somebody mixed my medicine

Somebody's in my head again again

And somebody mixed my medicine

Again, again, again

Again, again, again

Again, again, again”

The music started to slow down again, just like [y/n] movements, making Luke whisper words in awe.

“Somebody mixed my medicine

Somebody mixed my medicine

Somebody mixed my medicine”

Philip and the team applauded as [y/n] took her headphones off and the men put their instruments away.

 “I´m happy with that.”, she said looking at Philip. “You, Philly?”

“Sounded great to me.”, he gave back, happy to answer.

“What about my new favorite fan. Luke?”, Luke quickly pushed Spencer aside to get to the microphone.

“Loved every second of it! Like- Amazing! Really!”, she giggled, throwing her head back and came through the door.

“What about my new guard dog?”, Spencer pointed at himself, not knowing if she was talking about him. “Of course you. So, what do you think, Doctor?”

“I- I don’t really know.”, she raised her eyebrows at his answer.

“Okay? Was it the drugs or just the music in general?”, he felt himself go pale. “Ah, okay. You´re prude, get it. I mean you already have that whole tutor-thing about you, so…Bach or Chopin?”

“Pardon?” “Which one? Or is it Mozart, or the deaf bitch, Beethoven?”, she grinned snarky.

 [y/n] had a mocking tone in her voice, making Spencer feel embarrassed and like he was in school again, when the other kids in high school were making fun of him for not being cool enough. But he was too old to be bullied by a little junkie, who thought she was better than him.

 “I´m surprised somebody like you would even know them.”, her smile vanished.

“Little bitch.”, she snapped at him, stepping closer as he cocked his eyebrows at her. Philip quickly walked between the two of them and smiled.

“So, what are we doing next? The albums done. Taken care of. [y/n] have you eaten something today? You wanna go out for dinner?”

“No, I haven’t and no, I don’t want to, when THAT is around.”, with ‘that’ she clearly meant Spencer.

“Now don’t be grumpy, Princess. You started it.”, Hank told her and she started to pout, shoulders relaxing.

“Wasn’t worth my time anyways.”, she murmured and Spencer felt himself getting proud. This was the first person, trying to bully him, he had stand a chance against.

“So, we´re gonna need you at the police station, if that´s okay?”, Emily asked Leroy, Hank and Tom, who nodded. “And Spencer, you should take [y/n] home and check out her house.” “Mansion.”, [y/n] corrected Emily. “I have a mansion. Worked too hard to have it being called a house.”, Emily only nodded, not letting herself get bothered by her words. Philip nodded, completely ignoring his clients snappiness too.

“I follow you in my car.”, he told Spencer. “[y/n] give Dr. Reid your keys, please.”, she shook her head indignant.

“No. That guy is not driving my car. I´ll drive.”, the whole band now started saying no.

“[y/n], you´re not driving.”, Tom ordered and Leroy nodded. “You´ll get an DUI so quick, it´s not even funny.”, Spencer lifted his hand, waiting for the key. “Oh, come on.”, she groaned, looking at her bandmates like her childish behavior would change their mind.

 A nice sound. An annoying person, not getting what they want. Almost as beautiful as her [y/e/c] eyes, that actually were rather bloodshot, when Spencer thought about it.

 “Should the police pull you over and see that you´re high, they´ll look through your car and I don’t think you want be taking in custody for drug possession, right?”, she handed him her keys and Spencer couldn’t help it and whispered “Thank you”, in the most mocking tone he was able to.

“Fucking cunt.”, she whispered back at him and he just chuckled.

“I´ve been called worse. So your little words don’t hurt me…sorry.”, she then grinned.

“Things like Spencer?”, [y/n] asked him, spitting his name like poison.

 Spencer took a deep breath and watched her go out the door, telling himself to not answer her.

 “Hey, kid.”, Spencer looked at Hank and he just lifted his thumb.

“You held yourself better than we thought you would.”, Leroy added, Emily looking at Spencer concerned.

“You sure you can handle her?”

 He nodded, walking out the door and to the elevator which doors [y/n] was holding open for him.

 “Hurry up, bitch boy! I wanna go home.”

 *****

 Of course the rich, spoiled brat drove an imported sportscar. When Spencer got in, he firstly had to push back the seat, not having enough room for his legs and then tried getting [y/n] to tell him where she lived.

 “Try google, smart ass.”, was her answer and he sighed.

 [y/n] then rolled down her window and grabbed a joint from her glove compartment. Spencer quickly leaned over and snatched it from her hand, making her whine as she tried getting it back.

 “You´re such a bitch. Give me-“, he interrupted her whining.

“No. First tell me you´re address.”, she sat back into her seat.

“Fine. I´ll lead you there.”, [y/n] said, making grabbing motions with her hand and he handed her the joint back. She lit it and smoked out of the window.

 Spencer knew he should have questioned why she gave up and let him win so easily. After ten minutes they weren’t at her mansion, they were at a McDonald´s.

 “You´re fucking kidding me, right?”, he snapped at her and she began to giggle.

“You´re kina hot when you´re angry.”, her flirty grin and the way she bit her lip made him furious, because it was hot.

“What is wrong with you?”, Spencer almost yelled and she leaned back and pointed somewhere. “I´m hungry. Drive-Through. Over there.”

“No.” “Come on. Don’t be a bitch, dog.”, she snickered, resting her feet on the dashboard.

 He looked at her, for a second thinking about simply getting out of the car and leaving, before he could hurt her. Maybe she was really too much for him to handle, the drugs were manageable, but it was her personality that drove him mad, yet he wasn’t someone to give up easily. Cars started to honk behind them.

 “You´re holding up the traffic. I just wanted something to eat.”, [y/n] said, now almost annoyed because she wasn’t getting what she wanted. Spencer took a deep breath.

“Okay.”, she looked at him confused.

“Okay?”, he nodded, pulling into the Drive-Through. He was above this. ‘Give her what she wants, so she´s at least quiet.’

“You win.”

 She started clapping and hugged him, smelling like marijuana and something he couldn’t quite make out. When they came up to the microphone box, [y/n] crawled over Spencer´s lap, forcing him to look and think respectfully. She ordering a bunch of stuff and then looked at him.

 “What do you want? I only have booze at home, so…”, he looked at her a little startled. Was she trying to be nice to him?

“You wanna buy me something?”, she nodded like this behavior was normal to her. “Sure.”

“Surprise me. I never eat fast food, I don’t know what´s good.”

 She nodded and then told the voice from the box to double her order. Sitting back into her seat, [y/n] took out a hundred dollar bill from her purse, handing it to Spencer. When they pulled up by the window, taking their things, the woman in the window nearly lost it when she saw the rockstar, starting to cry. [y/n] was really nice to her and asked her if she wanted to take a photo in the parking lot. Of course the woman said yes and after paying, where [y/n] had left almost fifty bucks as a tip, Spencer had to park and wait till they had made the photo and given an autograph.

 “Okay, now drive before it goes viral. I wanna eat that stuff before it gets cold.”, she told him, taking a sip of one of the milkshakes.

“That was nice.”, she shrugged and then told him her address, telling him she´d scream when they reached it.

 *****

 Lo and behold, no twenty minutes later they parked in front of [y/n] mansion, next to another, more run down car, belonging to Philip. The mansion would´ve made Rossi´s mansion cry. At least twice as big and the property was enormous. In contrast to [y/n], it was very light and minimalistic from the outside and the inside.

 “Most rooms are empty. Too big.”, she explained walking straight into the open living area, that had a large terrace with pool and a view over the Hollywood hills. She put the paper bags filled with food on the large kitchen island and sat on a barstool.

“You could sell it and buy a smaller one.”, [y/n] shrugged and took out a burger, starting to eat it.

“Philip says I´m gonna grow into it.”, she answered, mocking the tone of voice her manager had probably had.

 Spencer watched her type something on her phone and a minute later Philip came into the room.

 “Hey, where were you? I got worried.”, he asked them and [y/n] handed him a salad.

“It´s the one you always have.”, he smiled at her.

“Thank you. You´re so nice.”, she shrugged at his words, not really caring.

“Yours is in here too, dog.”, she now told spencer.

 Ah, yes. She was being bitchy again. Spencer had only waited for it to happen. He said nothing, but walked up to the white kitchen isle and took the bag she pointed at.

 “Milkshake, burger, fries. Fast food essentials.”, she stated, finishing her small cheeseburger and getting up to her fridge, taking out a beer. She held it to Spencer who declined and then to Philip who did the same. “Lame asses.”, she chuckled, opening it and standing at the counter, watching Spencer eat. “So you´re here for…?”

“Technically it would be the easiest for all of us, if I just stayed.”, she raised her brows.

“Staying like, in my house staying?”, he nodded and she shook her head. “No chance. I enjoy my solitude.”

“[y/n]. If it´s easier for the agent and better for you…”, she sighed, opening a drawer and taking out some pills, swallowing them with her beer. “Fucking hell. But don´t expect me to be considerate of you.”, the rockstar told him.

“Should you consume them with alcohol?”, Spencer asked, taking a bite of his burger and she shrugged.

“I´m going to sleep…you guys…do what you want, I don’t care…”

“Do you need me to do your laundry?”, Philip asked and [y/n] shrugged again, it seemed to be her favorite motion. As she walked down the hallways and Phillip yelled after her. “Don’t forget that you have a gig tonight, [y/n]!”

“THAT`S WHY I`M GOING TO SLEEP NOW, DUMB ASS! WAKE ME UP WHEN WE NEED TO GO!”, she yelled back, followed by the smashing of a door.

 “She´s a nice girl.”, Philip said in the middle of the silence, as Spencer took place on one of the barstools.

“Like a car crash.”, the man in his fifties chuckled.

“I know she´s difficult, but in here she´s good.”, he pointed at his heart. “She has suffered a lot of losses in her life.”

“Then, just as a random thought, you should get into therapy before she OD´s.”, Spencer answered sassy.

“I know what you mean. But as long as she doesn’t want help or overdoes it…she has a system.”, Spencer let his head fall back and groaned.

“You know about that fucking thing?” “You too?”, Philip asked back in surprise. “Profiler. Took me no longer than the nap in her car, to figure that out.”

 Yes, a small lie from Spencer, but it sounded better then: Oh yes, I was addicted to dilaudid once. I had a system too!

 “Tell me, how does that train wreck of a system work?”, Philip leaned back from his salad.

“Well, she takes her painkillers in the morning and smokes some cannabis to get out of bed. When we´re touring or she has to be at shootings, interviews or anything else that needs her to focus, she only smokes and takes the pills all day, alcohol in water bottles is a new one though.”, Spencer sighed and thought if he even wanted to know more.

“And when she´s alone or not busy?” “Then she does the harder stuff.” “Harder stuff like cocaine, LSD…?”, Philip nodded. “Nothing with needles though…she´s scared of them.”

“She will not always be, if she continues like that.” “I know. That´s why I do my best to keep her busy. She even has her own recording studio here, knows how to handle everything herself. I thought it might make her spend more time making music than getting high. I also go out with her a lot, to a point where my wife starts to get jealous.”, he laughed bittersweetly. “Have you ever been to Disney World, agent?”, Spencer shook his head. “I take [y/n] there once a week, because she likes it there. I spend more time with her there then with my own daughter.”, [y/n] was famous, no chance people wouldn’t notice her.

“Does she even get to do anything there?”

“Not often. She mostly meets her fans there, but she loves that a lot. She is really sweet to them too, they mean everything to her.”

 That was the first time Philip had said something that was true about [y/n]. She had, not once been mean to a fan. The complete opposite actually. She had been nice and thoughtful, going out of her way to make the woman at the Drive-Through happy and was nice to Luke.

 “I know she was a little mean to you today, but she also bought us food, seeing it as a matter of course. There are two sides to every person, like a coin.”, Like a coin, just that [y/n] sides flipped as quickly like one too. Philip sighed and got up from his barstool. “I´ll show you around a little, if you want to.”

 Spencer nodded, getting up, following the short man around the house.

 *****

 [y/n] had been right.

It was way too big and many of the rooms were empty. When Spencer asked Philip about the necessity of such a big mansion, he told him, that he had hoped to motivate [y/n] to have a family one day. But now the only rooms in use were her bedroom, one of the five guest bedrooms, which Spencer got to stay in, the open living area with kitchen and living room, the recording studio and a little library. The latter made Spencer a little jealous. In the middle of the room even stood a white piano with notes on it. [y/n] also had a lot of books, all dusty, because she never read anymore. He would´ve killed to have his own library…she probably didn’t even value what she had.

 When they returned into the living area, Philip gave Spencer some spare keys, beginning to clean up a little and putting the food in the fridge. [y/n] didn’t lie, when she said, she only had alcohol at home. JJ came over and brought Spencer his go bag, asking him how it was going. Of course he said he was doing great, but couldn’t help but rant to her about [y/n]´s behavior.

 “Well, she is an addict, Spence. You know how erratic some drugs can make you.”, he nodded.

“Yeah, but she really tries pushing me and then, one second to the other, she´s nice and polite. Have you talked to her bandmates?”, JJ laughed.

“Way too long. We had interviews with them and then Luke just couldn’t stop talking to them, he has also taken about a million pictures with them and facetimed Penelope so she could meet them too.”, Spencer chuckled.

“Sounds like they had a good time. Anything else happened? Found out something?”

“[y/n]´s mother was an addict and left the family when she was younger. When she found out her daughter was famous, she got back in touch with her, to borrow money. [y/n] didn’t care and even got her to live with her, in one of the guest bedrooms. She overdosed a few months ago, since then [y/n]´s addiction got worse.”, Spencer´s eyes got wide.

“She didn’t die in the guest bedroom though, right?”

 Just as JJ wanted to answer, [y/n] walked in. Philip walking behind her with a duffle bag.

 “She died in the bathroom and she didn’t overdose perse, she drowned after falling unconscious in the bathtub, while being high.”, she answered cold, seeming to have overheard their conversation. [y/n] grabbed a beer from the fridge and continued calmly while taking some colorful pills. “I found her. The bathroom that it happened in is always locked. Don´t worry.”, Philip fidgeted a little with his hands, looking for his keys.

“Uh-Uhm. Agents? We need to go. The concert…”

“You coming too?”, [y/n] asked, looking at JJ and she shrugged. “We could also invite the cute one…Luke. It´s about 20.000 people so two more won´t hurt…right Philly?”, Phillip nodded.

“You´re all invited. SSA Prentiss as well.”, he said and JJ smiled at them.

“Thank you. That´s very nice, but I´ll have to talk to them first.”, [y/n] shrugged at that and drank her beer.

“You have my number, just call when you know. We start half past eight.”, Philip then took the empty beer bottle from [y/n] and threw it away. “Show time.”

 *****

 Half an hour into the concert Luke had shown up, completely hyped.

 “What did I miss? We had some ex-staff members to talk to. Did they already play ‘Going to Hell’?”, Spencer nodded. “Argh, dammit. Doesn’t matter, that song´s amazing too.”

 During the whole concert Spencer watched [y/n]. The music wasn’t that bad, a little harsh, but it was mix of hard and alternative rock after all. At least that´s what Penelope said, when Luke started facetiming her. After the last costume change, Spencer pulled [y/n] aside. He asked her to not be so ‘touchy’ with her fans. Since she would kneel down and hold their hands. He tried telling her about the risks of having the unsub in the audience, but she only laughed.

 “I´ll be as touchy as I want, bitch.”, he started to frown.

“At least don’t stagedive. Luke says you always do that and the risk of the unsub use-“, she interrupted him, wanting to go on stage.

“Fuck off, dog.”, he held her arm, trying to reason with her.

“Can you ple-“, she tried pulling away, like an angry child.

“No.” “Stop being so fuck-“, [y/n] interrupted him again.

“Stop trying to fucking babysit me.”

“I just want to hel-“, she ripped her arm away. “Yeah, fuck you too.”, the rockstar answered, not letting him finish and walked back on stage.

 Philip walked up to Spencer, having seem the ordeal of him trying to talk to [y/n] and him now  driving the heel of his palm into his eyes. This girl gave him migraines.

 “What happened?”, Philip asked and Luke answered for Spencer.

“He told her not to stagedive.”, Philip laughed a little and shook his head.

“Oh yeah. Never tell her what to do. She hates that and then does it out of spite.”

“You don’t say?”, Spencer answered sarcastically.

 On stage [y/n] took her microphone, saying something to her bandmates and then smiling sweetly, while talking to her fans.

 “This next song is for my lovely new babysitter, who thinks he can tell me what to do.”, the crowd started booing and she laughed. “I know, I know. But it looks like he doesn’t know how things work around here…So I think we have to help him out a little.”

 The music started to play and Luke patted Spencer´s arm.

“She dedicates ‘Heaven Knows’ to you! Penny have you heard? She sings ‘Heaven Knows’ for Reid!”

“NO! SHUT UP!”, the blonde on the phone squeaked.

 He and Garcia started to freak out while Spencer watched [y/n] clapping her thigh and stomping to the beat.

“Jimmy's in the back with a pocket of high

If you listen close, you can hear him cry

Oh Lord, heaven knows, we belong way down below

Sing it!”

She lifted the mic to her audience she started to sing for her.

Oh Lord, heaven knows, we belong way down below, way down below, way down below

“Judy's in the front seat picking up trash

Livin' on the dole, gotta make that cash

Won't be pretty, won't be sweet

She's just sittin' here on her feet singin'

Oh, Lord, heaven knows, we belong way down below

Go!”

Again her fans obeyed her, Luke and Penelope freaking out next to Spencer. If it wouldn’t have been a moment, were he had to fear which move she had planned next to unnerve him, he might have even enjoyed this song and the involvement of her fans in it.

Oh Lord, heaven knows, we belong way down below

“Sing, oh Lord, tell us so, we belong way down below”

She now looked at him for a moment, while her audience sang. Before, again, walking around the stage, touching her fans hands.

Oh Lord, tell us so, we belong way down below

Way down below, way down below, way down below, way down below

“I've had better days, man, I've seen better days

I've had better ways, man, I know better ways

One, two, three and four, the devil's knocking at your door

Caught in the eye of a dead man's lie

Show your life with your head held high

Now you're on your knees with a head on low

Big man tells you where to go

Tell them it's good, tell 'em ok

Don't do a goddamn thing they say”

Spencer was surprised how well her fans knew her lyrics. She would just have to point at them or lift her mic and they would instantly sing were she stopped. Not missing a beat.

Oh Lord, heaven knows, we belong way down below

Oh Lord, tell us so, we belong way down below

Way down below, way down below, way down below, way down below

“I've seen better ways, and I know better ways

I've seen better days, man, I've got better days”

[y/n] now stood at the edge of the stage, back turned to her audience. She smiled directly at Spencer, fingers held like a gun to her head.

“Gina's in the back with a pocket of high

If you listen close you can hear the cryin'”

At the last word she mimicked shooting herself and let herself fall back into the crowd. Her fans got wild and continued her song, while Spencer certainly not in a long time, if ever, felt so much spite and frustration against a woman, other than Cat Adams.

Oh Lord, heaven knows, we belong way down below

Oh Lord, tell us so, we belong way down below

Singin' oh, Lord, heaven knows, we belong way down below

Oh, Lord, tell us so, we belong way down below

The crown placed [y/n] back on her stage, where she walked up to her bandmates again, waving at Spencer and Luke with the sweetest smile.

Way down below, way down below, way down below, way down below, way down below

Way down below, way down below, way down below, way down below, way down below

 *****

 After the concert and the encores she and the band got behind stage, where Spencer for the least thirty minutes had waited to give her a piece of his mind. As [y/n] giggled and walked up to him and Luke. He grabbed her arm, a little harsher than planned.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?”, she blinked at his yelling, answering with her innocent eyes blinking and a mocking tone.

“What´s the prob, dog?”

“What´s- Do you really care so little for your own safety?”, Hank came up to them, having seen Spencer´s grip on the girls arm.

“Hey! What´s going on here? [y/n], are you okay?”, Spencer quickly let go of her.

“Yeah, the dog is just pissing himself because I stage dived.”, he quickly took a deep breath.

“I´m not pissing myself, [y/n], but I told you not to do it. What would you have done when your stalker would´ve been in the crowd and lost it? Nobody would´ve been able to get to you fast enough and help!”, Hank looked at her in disappointed shock.

“Is that true, [y/n]?”, the black haired girl ignored her friend and just continued arguing with Spencer.

“Well, maybe I don’t want anybody’s help!”, she hissed at Spencer.

“Then why are we even here?”, Spencer hissed back. “BECAUSE I BRING MONEY! Else the label would let me rot in a fucking corner! GOD! You are ruining my after-show-high. I hate you!”, [y/n] yelled and Spencer tried not to yell back, tried to be the bigger person, only hissing back at her.

“Oh, trust me. That feeling is mutual.”, she swallowed hard and then turned around, stomping away.

 *****

After half an hour waiting, Spencer got a call from Philip, telling him that [y/n] refused to see him again and would be sleeping at his house tonight. He told him, that he should just let himself into the mansion and eat what´s in the fridge. It wasn’t from use, to try talking to [y/n], when she was that angry. Tomorrow Philip would call him and bring her back into Spencer´s care.

Spencer did as told, Luke driving him to the mansion, telling him that it wasn’t his fault. He then got into the large, empty mansion and grabbed himself a well-deserved beer. Being alone in this big house was depressing. After his third beer he stopped, walking into his room.

He pulled his blue and gold sobriety token, he had gotten for being clean ten years, out of his bag. Thumb rubbing over the golden X in the middle of it. He actually had deserved a twelve year token by now, but since prison didn’t actively attended the meetings anymore, having grown past it. Yet, he still kept the tokens he had, close to him.

They reminded him of his achievement, reminded him to be proud at himself.

Spencer never wanted to fall back into the dark hole he was in, when he was addicted, and even when [y/n] would throw tantrum after childish tantrum, she wouldn’t cause him to relapse. He was stronger than this. Stronger than her.

To be continued...

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