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#junior college admissions
ap-telugu-weblinks · 2 years
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TTD Junior College Admissions 2022
టీటీడీ జూనియర్ కళాశాలల్లో ప్ర‌వేశానికి జూన్ 25వ తేదీ నుండి ఆన్లైన్‌లో ద‌ర‌ఖాస్తుల ఆహ్వానం.దరఖాస్తు చేయడానికి ఈ లింక్‌పై క్లిక్ చేయండి
TTD Junior College Admissions 2022 TTD Junior College Admissions 2022:- టీటీడీ జూనియర్ కళాశాలల్లో ప్ర‌వేశానికి జూన్ 25వ తేదీ నుండి ఆన్లైన్‌లో ద‌ర‌ఖాస్తుల ఆహ్వానం. తిరుప‌తిలోని శ్రీ పద్మావతి మహిళా జూనియర్ కళాశాల, శ్రీ వేంకటేశ్వర జూనియర్ కళాశాల‌లో 2022 – 23 విద్యా సంవత్సరానికి ప్ర‌వేశాల కోసం అర్హులైన విద్యార్థులు జూన్ 25 నుండి జూలై 10వ తేదీ వరకు దరఖాస్తు చేసుకోవచ్చు. ఆన్ లైన్‌లో దరఖాస్తు ఆంగ్ల…
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next essay I write is gonna be an analysis of FHJY and how Kipperlilly's viewpoint and perception parallels what students are taught to value and emphasize when it comes to the college admissions process and writing college essays (aka trauma is a golden ticket)
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eliteprepsat · 1 year
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When you think of the eleventh grade, what comes to mind?
Probably a number a things. Things like academic pressure. Leadership positions. Standardized tests. College planning. And all while learning to drive!
Junior year of high school is an onslaught of responsibilities and activities, and seemingly never enough time to get everything done. Junior year is also considered the most important year of high school for college admissions. Amidst the nonstop flurry, it is important to recognize this significance and take the necessary steps to prepare you for your future. So, all you high school juniors (or soon-to-be juniors), read on to find out how to put yourself in prime position for college admissions.
1. End on a strong note 🏁
Junior year grades are one of the strongest indicators of your academic potential, and college admissions officers will examine your grades closely. Colleges look for either a record of consistent academic achievement or an upward trend in a student’s grades. End-of-junior-year grades provide valuable insight into your overall academic trajectory, so strive for the highest grades possible. Truly push yourself and devote the necessary amount of time required to master the concepts in your classes. Make use of any academic support your school or teachers provide. If you are still struggling, consider forming study groups with your peers or using online resources to maximize your efforts.
2. Continue to challenge yourself 💪
As you plan your senior year class schedule, remember to maintain a rigorous academic course load. Colleges want to see you take advantage of the academic options available to you. The more you push yourself, the more you demonstrate your capacity to take risks and seek out growth. At the same time, be sure not to overload yourself by balancing out your core classes with electives that support your passions and/or future ambitions.
3. Know your counselor and teachers well 🍎
Many colleges require both counselor and teacher recommendations. If you have established positive relationships with them in advance of the application season, their letters of recommendation will have the personal touch necessary to help you stand out. If you haven’t done so already, set up a meeting with your counselor to discuss your academic future. To get a head start on the process, you may also consider asking your teachers to serve as your recommender before school lets out for the summer. Plant your seeds early, so they have enough time to sprout!
4. Create a resume
Having all of your activities documented in a central place allows you to conveniently showcase your extracurricular involvement. Not only will colleges ask for an activities list but potential summer programs or employers may also ask for one. A resume can also include accomplishments, awards, skills, languages spoken and more. Develop your resume today, expecting to update it as new developments occur in your life.
5. Map out your testing schedule 🗺️
Junior year is ALL about testing. You take the PSAT in the fall, and AP/IB exams happen in the spring. The SAT/ACT looms and SAT Subject Tests beckon. Depending on your college ambitions, you made need to take only a couple of these tests or so many that you'll have a hard time keeping track of them. Mapping out your testing schedule will help you prepare for each one and give you a clear idea of all the necessary requirements to fulfill.
6. Apply to a summer program, job, or internship
The summer after junior year is an ideal time to pursue professional or enrichment opportunities. Consider a part-time job or a program/internship that may shed light on your career goals. These activities build character and will add another dimension to your college application. Begin the process of researching opportunities as soon as possible. The process of applying to a job or summer program also functions as a precursor to the process of applying to college.
7. Research colleges
There are thousands of colleges to which you can apply, but you will ultimately end up choosing just one. Narrowing down your choices and creating a college list that best fits you and your goals requires extensive research. Identify the specific criteria that you are looking for in a college and let that guide your selection process. Make note of any local college fairs, open houses, or college visits that fit into your schedule, and start getting on the radar of any colleges that interest you.
8. Sharpen reading comprehension and writing skills ✍️
Developing competent reading and writing skills will confer a number of immediate benefits. Your standardized test scores will improve across the board. Your academic and college application essays will shine more clearly. You will also be better equipped for your college freshman workload. Go beyond the instruction offered in your English classes and make a concerted effort to improve your reading and writing abilities through regular practice.
In general, this advice applies to all four years of high school, but they apply with extra force during junior year. If you follow these steps, you will enter the college application season well-prepared, reducing some of the stress that comes along with applying to college. This advice requires time, but if you actively incorporate it, you will establish a solid foundation for your future success.
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தமிழக வேளாண்மை பல்கலைக்கழகத்தில் வேலை காலியாக உள்ள JRF பணிகள் நிரப்புவதற்கான அறிவிப்பு வெளியாகியுள்ளது
தமிழக வேளாண்மை பல்கலைக்கழகத்தில் வேலை காலியாக உள்ள JRF பணிகள் நிரப்புவதற்கான அறிவிப்பு வெளியாகியுள்ளது #govtjobs #upsc #ssc #currentaffairs #gk #ssccgl #ias #jobs #governmentjobs
TNAU Recruitment 2022 Apply JRF Notification: தமிழக வேளாண்மை பல்கலைக்கழகத்தில் வேலை காலியாக உள்ள JRF பணிகள் நிரப்புவதற்கான அறிவிப்பு வெளியாகியுள்ளது | தமிழ்நாடு அரசு அதிகாரப்பூர்வ அறிவிப்பினை  வெளியிட்டுள்ளது. விண்ணப்பிக்க ஆர்வமுள்ளவர்கள் 09/12/2022 முதல் 16/12/2022க்குல் அஞ்சல் மூலமாக விண்ணப்பிக்கவும் விண்ணப்பிக்கும் நபர் விண்ணப்பிக்கும் முன்பு கீழே கொடுக்கப்பட்டுள்ள பணிக்கான கல்வித் தகுதி ,…
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braaan · 1 year
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Indulgence (w/ Hyewon)
male reader & iz*one hyewon
smut, fluff, angst, 3k words
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For as long as you’ve known, you’ve been allergic to chocolate.
You’ve had to just trust me through the majority of your childhood, eyebrows knit and eyes misty as other kids tore through gold and silver foil; biting the inside of your mouth bloody instead of hard-earned Halloween candy. 
But you’d be lying if you said you’d never indulged. 
Under blankets, cloaked in moonlight, secrecy, and sin, you delighted in what you could sneak to bed in your grubby hands. 
And for such an innocent sweet, you pieced together that it was as close to tangible a paradox could get. You reveled in how unwrapped, it was equal parts fully solid and simultaneously already melting into your fingerprints; how in taste, it was equal parts acutely bitter and simultaneously sickly sweet; how to your allergies, it was equal parts undoubtedly delectable and simultaneously why you were sweating in the cold and breaking out into bright pink patches across your neck. The symptoms were nothing close to fatal, of course, just enough of an eyesore that the wiser part of you wouldn’t eat it outside.
So: you could have chocolate, just not the optics.
You’ve pieced together enough that the same antithetical pull is what draws you to Kang Hyewon.
See, when you take the newly vacant student counselor position by next-in-line default, you just trust me’d that it’d be an easy job. You were a newly minted senior with college lined up in the fall, and wanted to take your rite of passage freedom to slack off for the rest of the school year. Now, in lieu of that, you had to man a class outfitted to become a makeshift war room for juniors as they summarized, re-summarized, and then re–re-summarized full life stories into 650-word–bite sizes. 
And the college essay was not an easy opponent.
Nothing was sacred enough to not be sharpened into a sob story; tightly-wrapped childhood traumas unpacked for college admissions readers to casually pick away at if it meant more of a chance than the next applicant. The whole experience took a pressure cooker to any crumb of anxiety, and it was now your job to help navigate this.
Hyewon was a junior assigned to your group who you got to know in excruciating detail for two reasons. One, she was a slow writer. 
The college application was arguably a solved concept. At best, it was a game of madlibs with a very tough audience. Fill in prompts about your childhood, upbringing, and aspirations to an interesting enough degree, fudging details here and there where you can to pull at heartstrings or fluff up the footsteps you want to follow in, score enough points, tick enough boxes, and you’d have a good shot. 
But every time without fail, you got to lean back in your chair as Hyewon approached every new question like it was her first. You got to study her tells: how she tucked her lips into a pout, dimpling her chin; wrestled a hair tie out of where it nestled in her wrist; and gathered everything but two obedient strands of hair out of her face into a loose ponytail, only to slowly inch her gaze towards you a little bit later to ask how everyone else answered the question. 
And two, you were absolutely head over heels.
Every time you’ve tried to pinpoint exactly what it is about Hyewon that makes your stomach queasy, you end up finding two more things that do.
One of your first leads came from how she seemingly made striking so soft. When she’d catch you in her gaze, Hyewon had a way of zeroing anything else out; like the implication was that the both of you were sharing a single breath, and any more that you took would take away from hers. No dice. 
Another answer came from how from the almond curvature in her eyes, the porcelain ridge on her nose, the satisfied crease that nestled between her lips, down to the curve on her chin, it was like Hyewon physically wasn’t made up of any hard angles; like before God put her on Earth to remind everyone what was holy still existed, an angel double-checked his work. No luck there either. 
It only took a couple rounds of this for you to make peace with the ambiguity; that some things were best left unanswered.
The tension that stood in stark contrast to all of this was that you, of course, were her goddamn counselor.
There isn’t a lot of graceful space between being forward and manipulative, and it wouldn’t take too disingenuous of a read for someone to question what was behind your relationship. Something about reciprocation and mutual understanding becoming dishonest when your job was literally getting to the core of Hyewon’s deepest motivations and anxieties — it didn’t take a lot of logic to see how much the guise of writing her essays made things oh so convenient.
The entire situation was at best delicate and at worst, spelled hauntingly awkward hometown visits during spring break, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. 
So: you couldn’t have Kang Hyewon, the optics wouldn’t let you.
And as if you needed more of a reason, Hyewon was quirky.
You see, where other burnt out juniors had journaling or, like, gateway drugs, Hyewon had an affirmations folder. Slotted in the corner of her phone, accessible by a one-tap shortcut, was an application that she kept photos and voice notes-
“To remind me I’m doing well,” she asserts in the middle of a particularly long stretch of you poking fun at it. “You sound like you might’ve needed it considering all this projection.”
“Let’s walk back projection some,” you try and parry, palms raised.
“I mean, I’d be jealous too if I realized I did college applications the wrong way,” she adds, singsongy enough to read sweet but also with enough acid that it lands how you both know she intended. And then: “Why don’t you add to it?”
You pause for a beat, and Hyewon takes the cue, her eyes darting from her laptop keyboard to the look on your face.
“Ew, and not in any of the ways you’re thinking,” she spits. “You know, because you’re helping me secure my future at a great college or whatever. It’ll be sentimental or some shit.”
You try for a response, but the wiser part of you shuts you up. You tap the red button on her screen and leave her something sentimental or some shit.
“You’re doing great, Hyewon.”
-
For better or worse, this was how the two of you operated: permanently playing high school footsies — loaded, foxy, but finished with enough deniability that you could chalk it up to hormones or puberty. And between the two of you, Hyewon was much better at the game. In your defense, though, she didn’t play by the rules. You’d draw a line in the sand-
i just think this is really cliche, your latest Google Docs comment on her personal statement reads. do you not have any other family stories
And she’d dive headfirst over it-
odd way of getting to know me perv, she replies, before: i don’t like it either. i’ll rewrite!
But you knew you had to continue walking it back. 
Call it pretend, call it reputational awareness, call it whatever you want, for one reason or another, you were aware of the very thin line of implication the both of you straddled and were afraid enough to never cross it. Balancing on it, sure — you’d swim behind the buoys all day, but you knew better than to test even just beyond where the waves picked up. 
Just as luck would have it, though, it seemed like Hyewon followed a cosmic force your polar opposite. Whether on purpose or blissfully ignorant, it felt like she never looked down at where she was from the line, or even if she knew it existed. But whether like a siren out at sea testing your limits or reciprocating your feelings because she felt the same way, you’d never know.
-
“I just feel like this entire thing is so dumb,” Hyewon remarks, gesturing with a golden fry that drooped downwards like it was somber about the whole thing, too. 
It was finally a Friday, which meant that unlike every other day that week in your marathon of after school essay read-throughs and polishing, you could exhale for a little. 
You had just finished a long stretch of final edits for your counseling group and were taking things as slow as possible in hopes of making time move the same. You and Hyewon were parked in your car behind an old church building, under the only lamp that worked. Between the two of you sat an oily paper box on top of your center console, housing a scattering of drive through fries and in lieu of ketchup, a single frosty.
“You and everyone in the country, Hyewon,” you smirk, venturing into the box to find the perfect dipping fry.
She returns you an annoyed kiss of her teeth. “Come on. I mean, seriously. For the past couple of months, it’s just been me and how much I can cut up my identity into palatable answers. How much I can think of the future I’ll create. How much I can look backwards and pull out the motivations behind everything I’ve ever done.”
You stop and look over at her. She’s slouched in the passenger car seat, supported mostly only by the small of her back, with her feet up on your dashboard and in the Hyewon usual: everything in a loose ponytail besides two obedient strands. She’s slightly turned away from you, looking longingly at part of her reflection in the rear-view mirror like the implication was that behind the glass, the other her was happier. 
You couldn’t help but sympathize. You wondered where you were a year ago, in her shoes: in the middle of writing essays and imagining how you were going to brand yourself for college. 
“It’s cliche,” she prefaces. “But I feel like all this looking forwards and backwards… I’m not allowed to enjoy today, you know? The clubs, the grades, the people — I don’t know if I’m doing anything for the application or because I want to do it.”
When you look back at her again, you’re directly in her gaze. 
“Are you excited about college?”
You thumb at the fries at the bottom of the box wistfully, if not to buy yourself some thinking time, at least to cut a little bit through the very expectant silence. But you didn’t have much to ponder; you had an answer loaded a long time ago.
You try to couch it as harmlessly as possible. 
“I don’t know,” you start, looking for the words. “I guess I’m excited for the clean slate, right? Something about getting to close this chapter of my life and everything that came with it. The clubs, the grades, the people — being done with things I’ll cringe at in a couple of years and questions I didn’t get the answers to.”
You cautiously try for, and catch her gaze again. There’s a beat where you’re both just staring — it could have been a couple, you’re trying your hardest not to keep count — and the line you’re both teetering on erodes, now paper thin. Your ears are hot, expectant; you’re floating by the buoys and reaching out just past, testing the waters.
Hyewon’s eyes soften and her whole body decompresses with her as she lets out a short sigh.
“Beautiful,” she chides, and it’s back to a face you know: the space where her eyes meet the bridge of her nose pinches, and her lips curl up into a satisfied grin. “Some of your best work, really. Like you’re getting desperate for more spots in the affirmation journal.”
And like you rolled down all the windows at the same time, the moment dissipates into the evening, and you’re washed back onto shore.
You tap the red button on her screen.
“Keep going, Kang Hyewon.”
-
If you were being honest, there was a lot you learned about optics.
Firstly, they were exhausting to keep up with. Sure, there was a level of tactness that at a baseline was acceptable to expect of other people, but anything beyond that strayed into pushing an agenda.
And secondly, no one ever keeps a guise up in private.
Because every day you got back to the four walls of your room, cloaked in nothing but moonlight, secrecy, and sin, all you could think of was Kang Hyewon.
And you’d be lying if you said you never indulged.
Your hands find the familiar length of your shaft as they always did, and as you rouse your cock awake, your fingers working counterclockwise as your girth responds in kind, you’re coaxed to attention by the permanent picture you have of Hyewon. 
Her hair is up in her usual ponytail, and you reach out to brush the two loose strands of hair away from her face and behind her ears as she kneels down to get below you, sitting on her feet. There’s a beat where you’re both just staring, Hyewon shadowing your length, her head cocked to the side. You study the almonds that shaped her eyes, how softly her nose sloped before it peaked, and as you got to the crease between her lips, you didn’t think there existed a better place to start. 
You press the head of your cock between Hyewon’s lips and almost like she was protesting your entry, her tongue slid out to meet it. Your thumb teases along the slit in your tip as you imagine Hyewon runs a long line of saliva in between it and down the full length of your shaft and back, her tongue flat and obedient, slow and wandering where it wanted. 
Hyewon licked you clean, running her tongue in circles around your length, teasing in response as you stroked up and down.
In your other hand, like you needed it, you instinctively pulled up Hyewon’s profile, the quick strokes and key presses to get there like clockwork, burned into your memory. And as luck would have it, as if all the gods above shined on you at once, in her last selfie, Kang Hyewon poked a fat tongue out at the camera, unassuming, teasing, and throwing your lust into wanton overdrive.
“Fuck,” you rasp, breath hot, barely a whisper. “Hyewon, you’re so good at that.”
-
“Hyewon, you’re doing so well.”
“You’re doing great, Hyewon.”
Completely engulfed under a blanket, safeguarded by only moonlight, secrecy, and sin, Kang Hyewon indulged in the depths of her affirmations journal. One of her hands sloppily swapped between thumbing the play button on her screen and swiping through its pages, and the other hand buried itself deep in her sweatshorts. Hyewon craned her neck towards her phone, getting as close as she possibly could to the small speaker it sported as she cycled through soundbite after soundbite of your praise for her. Her other hand was busy at work, thumbing the alphabet over her clit as she ran two fingers up and down her needy cunt. 
She didn’t need to close her eyes long to imagine what she’d burned into her head over nights of repeating this exact sequence, her mouth drying up, breaths broken into short pants as she felt your hands work their way through her sides like she was chocolate, melting into your fingerprints. 
You thumbed lazily at her ribs, caressing the skin under her breasts, taking your time as you completely unwrapped her. The full length of your cock replaced where her fingers busily worked, sliding up and down across her sloppy entrance. 
The teasing is unbearable — there’s all this implication, tension, and slow burning in the rubbing between her inner thighs that you’re working with — and Hyewon puts all her energy into looking down at where you are. You catch her in your gaze, and through eyes half-lidded, there’s a beat where you’re both just staring — it could’ve been two, Hyewon was trying her best not to keep count.
“Please,” she tries, barely a whisper in the heat. And as she picks up the rhythm against her clit: “Please put your cock in me.”
Because as much as she craved the real thing — getting with her counselor? Could you imagine the optics?
She taps the button on her screen.
“Keep going, Kang Hyewon.”
---
;)
branfics debut! hope you enjoyed!! thank you @capslocked, @majorblinks, @praeluxius, @ggidolsmuts for pre-reading and just truly setting the standard — literally none of this comes out without the inspiration and LUV i get from being around yall
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stayinhellevator · 9 months
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Hard To Love
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Where Chan was hard to love but harder to not. Pairing: Bang Chan x gn!Reader // Lee Know x gn!Reader Genre: Angst with fluff at the end / friends to lovers Word Count: 4471  Warning: cuss words, implied toxic behaviour, mentions of a girlfriend and ragging. Playlist: Every Road Leads ~ Bette Midler
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Bang Chan was hard to love. To you at least.
You had known Christopher Bang all your life. Your parents were neighbours turned friends which naturally passed on to Chan and you; childhood best friends keeping their friendship intact all the way to high school and even through college. And now, even as you both were adults, occupied in your own jobs, your friendship still remained, stronger than ever.
It was safe to say, you had the best memories with Chan. Be it breaking rules or crying over some soppy ass movie on a Saturday night; laughing at weird corny jokes or bawling over a nasty breakup. All your firsts also belonged to each other, call it curiosity or whatever. There wasn’t much to complain about your platonic journey with Chan.
Except when there was. Things weren’t all that platonic on your end, after all. And how couldn’t they? Chan was perfect after all, at least for you. To you. But it was hard to love Christopher ‘Chan’ Bang.
“Hey __!! Where’s Chan hyung? Is he not coming tonight?”
Jeongin’s loud call jerked you back into the present, as you noticed all of their attention was now on you.
“He said he’ll be on time and now everyone’s here while he’s slacking.”
Hyunjin dramatically shook his head, as if to expressly show his disapproval, not that Chan or anyone in the room cared much.
“How would I know? I’m right here, sitting with you guys, aren’t I?”
You tried using sarcasm as a way to ward off their attention from you, knowing that they thought you both must’ve fought and were now grovelling for each other. But the truth was, you really didn’t know where Chan was; you hadn’t known anything about him for a few months now.
“I don’t know, you guys are always attached to each other’s hip so…”
Jisung’s voice, masked with indifference, couldn’t hide the amusement that filled his eyes at the irony of the situation, which made you scoff in annoyance.
As Chan and you got into high school, you befriended Changbin and Minho respectively and together you guys made a lot of memories and unable to part ways, you took admission in the same college where you found Jisung and his younger brother Seungmin, then Hyunjin and lastly Minho’s younger brother Jeongin too joined your group, all of them a year junior to the four of you. The last to join your group was also a junior, another Australian, Felix, that Chan saved from ragging and introduced him to your group. Since then the nine of you are inseparable.
Honestly though, the group was always divided a little by biases towards Chan and you. Changbin and Minho sided with you for some reason. If teams were being formed, they would be the first to pick you, even when Chan wouldn’t and you could now for sure say that if things ever went downhill, they’d be the ones to never leave your side whereas Hyunjin, Han and Jeongin always biased Chan, dare you say revered him for some reason. Felix was the obvious one, Chan literally was his knight in shining armour though your friends always joked that he had some kind of bi-panic towards Chan and you. Seungmin on the other hand, couldn’t be bothered less. If it were casually picking teams, he’d go by whatever team he was feeling that day. But if it were a serious issue, he’d always side with whatever he thought was right. So he never really picked a side.
In his words, “I dislike you motherfuckers all the same.” But you knew that his precious heart would and could never pick sides. And you adored him and this little chosen family of yours, even if they gave you run for your money sometimes, a little less than you adored Chan though.
Chan was for a lack of better words, MIA these days. He used to tell you that he couldn’t survive an hour without you, which was somewhat true based on your history. You guys were indeed always attached to hip, no matter how much you wanted to punch the smirk off Jisung’s face.
“Sorry guys I had an emergency.”
Lo and behold, there he was. The man of the hour, truly. He was on everybody’s mind yet you couldn’t be sure what or who was on HIS mind. Strolling in so casually and effortlessly gorgeous, oblivious to the storm in your head, greeting everyone with that bright smile of his that easily made your heart skip a beat or two. He exuded main character energy; the handsome protagonist that makes all the girls in college swoon, that is adored by children and elders alike, the favourite friend of all the parents, the one that can easily make friends with even the coldest person in the world, the one who got the most roses during valentines and would smoothly reject them with the most innocent face as if he didn’t know the entire female population of the college liked him.
He was annoying and charming and you were just another female in that lot, who failed to resist him. But who could blame you when you were so close to him that you could almost taste the kind of love that you wanted from him. You were not delusional after all, just hopeful.
“Hey sweet girl! How are you doing?”
But it was harder to not love him, especially when he spoke to you like that. The sweet nicknames in his honey like voice, the genuine adoration in his alluring eyes and the way his words seemed to always melt your heart in a mush. You’ve loved him ever since you first understood what love was.
“I’m good. How about you?”
You could feel the squeak in your words, and so did the other seven men in the room, as if someone had wrung your throat and made you answer but Chan only passed you his infamous flashing smile.
“I’m good too, now that I’ve seen you.”
And he said it so casually, oblivious to the heat spreading the entirety of your face and the racing of your heart, that you knew it didn’t mean what you actually wanted it to mean. This was the real him, he had always been good with words, it came naturally to him. Maybe you weren’t a special case to him for he naturally had so much love to give to everyone, even if you selfishly wanted to be the only one.
Maybe, this was all he ever was-oblivious. He couldn’t see what the rest of your friends could, your parents could, the entire college could, heck you’re sure even a stranger would if they were to be in your vicinity. But he didn’t. He couldn’t see the person he said he knew the best. At least, not anymore. You should’ve known. He was the best at obliviousness.
“You were the one who disappeared and are now suddenly back with your cheesy words.”
You rolled your eyes at him, trying to feign nonchalance, pretend that you didn’t care about him, pretend that it didn’t hurt, his actions don’t hurt. After all, this was what you were the best at-pretence.
He sat beside you with a soft, dramatic ‘oof’ and wrapped his arms around your shoulders in a bear hug. You let out a sigh of relief, as if a burden was lifted off your shoulders.
“I’m sorry. I know that’s on me but I was going through something, that I’ll soon share with you, before you say it. You know I’d never abandon you like that, don’t you?”
You did know that, didn’t you? Chan had always been so attentive and caring towards you ever since your first day at kindergarten together. Holding your hands all the way up to class, tending to your physical injuries, lending his shoulders to cry on, memorised all your allergies and actively watched out for you, never letting you walk on the road side, crossing roads with you as if he were protecting a child, having your orders from all cafés and restaurants at the back of his mind and even healing all your mental scars, all but that which were related to him. How could you not love him when he made you feel like you were on top of the world, like you two were the only ones for each other, like he reciprocated your feelings? These little things were what actually attracted you to him.
Only to go on dates with people that could even give supermodels run for their money. His dates made you realise that you would never be close to his ideal type, you’d never be what he wants in life, thereby discouraging you from confessing whenever you mustered up some courage.
“Yeah you’re being unfair to all of us. Do you know how much __ missed you? Kept asking about you all the damn time.”
You glared at Felix with so much heat that he visibly squirmed at his place, beside Seungmin, who though had a blank look on his face, smacked his arm as if gesturing to stop his nonsense.
“The last time I remember, it was Chan’s minions, who were hassling __ for his whereabouts, Felix, wasn’t it?”
Changbin, as always, your saviour took your side and effectively shut the boys up, who were clearly enjoying your plight.
“Ah! My bad, guys. But what’s so wrong with my girl missing me, Bin?”
You jerked up from his hold to look at him but he didn’t let your hands escape his as he stared back at you with a playful glint in his warm eyes. You could hear a lot of ‘oohs’ and giggles around you but you couldn’t care less because he was doing it again; giving you hope that you guys were something more, only to turn around and switch to the same old best friends forever shit.
“No no there’s absolutely nothing wrong with YOUR girl missing you.”
You could hear Hyunjin’s annoying drawl but you held your breath, waiting for him to do just exactly what you expected of him, you knew him better than he knew you after all, heck you knew him better than he knew himself and you knew you couldn’t be wrong about him, even though you kept hoping against hope. You wanted to be wrong tonight.
“Exactly! So stop teasing my best friend about it.”
Yup! There it was; the tag that you once wore with honour gradually turning into a weight holding you down. The giggles quietened as your shoulders sunk and you relaxed back into the couch, you didn’t know what’s on everyone’s mind but you surely expected it to happen once again because you also knew that Chan had always enjoyed attention, you just didn’t expect to be one of his enjoyment sources as well but you slowly learnt that maybe you were too. He liked knowing that he had your heart on the palm of his hands; knowing that he was the only one for you, finding comfort in the fact that no matter what he did and no matter where he went, he could always come back home to you. And you would take him back with open arms, like a fool. Always.
But you had enough. You thought tonight you’ll tell him of your feelings and be done with it, once and for all. You knew he won’t accept them but at least you’d get your closure with his rejection and move on to a life without the hopes of Chan as your boyfriend.
“Then start being my best friend properly. I can’t be the only one in this friendship anymore, could I?”
You knew the weight of your words surprised not only Chan but also the rest of the group, who now looked alert and uncomfortable, knowing it wasn’t a jest anymore for you. Chan’s eyes widened with disbelief did nothing to deter yours filled with determination.
“Baby don’t be like that. For once, think about me and you’d understand why I was gone for a while. Please don’t make a scene tonight, when all of us are here and so happy together; when I’m so happy after a long time.”
His words, as much as had the powers to heal me, also had the powers to destroy me from within. How could he so subtly call me selfish? I don’t think about him? If only he still cared about me he’d know that all I ever thought about was him. Did he also imply that he was so unhappy but all I did was ignore him and make a scene out of everything? I didn’t listen to him? Hah! If he wanted, I could recite everything he’s ever said to me, word by word. That’s how much I paid attention to him.
“That was a little too harsh, wasn’t it Chan hyung? Why don’t you just get straight to the point and save us all the misery of your oh-so-unhappy-life?”
Seungmin, as always the blunt Angel that he was, said with a finality. When all Chan saw was the disbelief on everyone’s face and understood that he disappointed everyone with the choice of his words, he knew he took it too far.
“Okay! I guess it’s time to tell you all. You remember the hot girl I hooked up with in that downtown bar six months ago?”
Of course you did, even if nobody else did because you remember feeling like a 16 year old heartbroken kid all over again when you found Chan making out with a beautiful stranger when you turned to find him after a quick toilet break.
“Well we caught up again six months back and decided to see where it leads us. We took a break off to Jeju and damn I had the time of my life. I think it’s safe to say we’re ready to date now. I don’t think I’ve been happier in my life ever.”
Six months since Chan disappeared on you, leaving you wondering if you did something wrong. Six months since he left you and started thinking of a life with someone else, without informing you. Granted you didn’t have to know everything about his life but he couldn’t even tell you he’d be gone, as a best friend?
Oh! How pathetic you were, truly. When all your happiness only ever relied on him, he didn’t even think you had ever made him feel joyous. Were you jealous, angry, hopeless or heartbroken? You didn’t know; maybe all of it, in that order. Suddenly 24 years of friendship felt suffocating to you, useless even, if he couldn’t share his whereabouts and woes with you.
“Wah! You’re so cool dude. You got two of the coldest and the most gorgeous chicks of our college crazy in love with you. Damn!”
And of course Hyunjin was going to praise Chan, as if he had saved the world. Even Jeongin looked scandalised with the amount of bullshit that came out of Hyunjin’s mouth, then it was fair enough that Minho almost strangled him.
“Wait! Two? Who’s the other one.”
Hah! What a funny guy he was; couldn’t even keep quiet for once and let you silently grovel in your misery. Thankfully though, the chime of your phone from a colleague gave you an excuse to escape. Of course you weren’t going to actually answer the phone because you didn’t think you could form words without a tremor in your voice.
But you couldn’t stop your thoughts from going haywire now. Should you have told him sooner? Was it your fault? Were you not obvious enough? Of course he wouldn’t actually ever pick you, who were you after all? He had so many better choices, someone he would be proud to have by his side. You were never enough, you had always known then why did it hurt so much?
“You can stop blaming yourself now.”
Minho’s sweet voice tinged with sternness infiltrated your thoughts as you saw him take a seat beside you on the patio bench. You took deep breaths, trying to hold your emotions.
“You once told me it was okay to cry and let out my feelings in front of you because you’d never judge me for it. Tonight I ask the same of you. I think you’ve tortured yourself enough.”
An exhausted sigh followed by a stream of tears finally escaped you as you let your emotions wash over you and rest your head on Minho’s shoulder. Never had you ever thought that someone other than Chan would ever be able to comfort you, least of all Minho.
Minho wasn’t the most expressive person, even if you could swear that he was the one who felt the most emotions-the most hurt, the happiest, the most excited and even the angriest. You knew that he checked his emotions so damn much because sometimes they drove him, in his words, insane. While you knew he had your back as did, you his, he wasn’t your closest friend. You had the least amount of memories with him, you both were a weird bunch to be honest.
“This was bound to happen one day then why does it hurt so much?”
You didn’t even think he heard your whisper but he surprised you, not that you even expected a reply.
“Because feelings can’t be helped and you felt too many of them for just one person all your life.”
You buried your face in his shoulders as your cries turned into silent sobs and his arms tightened around you. You could swear it was the safest you’d felt in a while, dare you say like the comfort of a home and you wondered why Minho had never held you before for you swore his hug was soothing.
“I think it’s better this way.”
Your words prompted him to make distance so as to look at your face but you weren’t ready to look at his face, afraid of his judgement.
“He’s perfect in every sense and he seeks perfection in every sense while I can never be even close to perfection nor have I ever strived to be. You know those main characters of a movie who’s rich, good looking, charming, got a gorgeous troublesome ex but somehow ends up with a character that’s completely opposite of them? Chan is that main character to me. I think that even if I confessed to him and he had accepted me I’d always be anxious, trying my best to keep him in my life, make sure he’d never grow bored of me, be his perfect other half and that would’ve ultimately killed the person within me that he liked, or if ever liked.”
You gave a bitter smile at your fate and walked away from the bench while staring at the moon that looked so pretty yet unattainable, just like Chan. So close yet so far.
“He never deserved you any way. You deserve so much better and more than he could give you.”
You let out a sarcastic scoff at Minho’s words as you felt him coming closer to you.
“And who said that?”
“I’m saying that. Changbin says that. Heck, even Chan’s minions know that. If this isn’t enough for you, then all those roses in your locker say that.”
You were sure there was a frown on your face at his reply. Maybe Minho was more delusional than you because no way in hell so many people would ever think that way. You appreciated his efforts to make you feel better but he didn’t have to lie to your face. All of a sudden, you felt his fingers on your jaw, pulling you to face him as you stood wide-eyed in surprise.
“You never noticed these things because you were so busy noticing what Chan needed. You never noticed those roses and letters in your locker because you were focused on his; you rejected all prom dates because you were busy moping as he picked his date; you never noticed how the entire college stoped to look back at you as you entered the campus because you were always focused on what Chan was saying. You never noticed how much I love you because you were busy loving him.”
The only words that managed to knock your breath out after this sudden proximity between you two were the last few words that escaped from him as his eyes softened at your now misty ones while his fingers kept caressing your cheeks as if to ground you to the present.
“Minho!”
And a soft whisper of his name was all you could manage to let out. You were sure that your heart had pretty much skipped an entire rhythm right now. How could he be in love with you? He never even gave any signs. He was always so distant that you even thought he disliked you when you first spoke to him. He rested his head on yours as both of you closed your eyes, feeling an ecstasy that was never felt before.
“I’ve been in love with you ever since I first saw you in the college cafeteria. It was impossible to not notice you when you were practically glowing in my eyes; so pretty, had such a sweet giggle, spoke so passionately about how Toy Story 1 was the best movie and other sequels should’ve never been made, cried over a hurt kitten all in one day of knowing you; all these things made me want to wrap you in a blanket burrito and never let go.”
You let out a little chuckle as your grip tightened on his shirt and more tears escaped you.
“I wanted to approach you, tell you I wanted to date you but you were clearly not interested in anything romantic if it wasn’t with Chan so I settled for being friends. I thought it was better to have some of you than none of you. You said that Chan was the main character in your story but you were the main character in mine.”
This time you didn’t stop the sob that came out of you, thinking about how much you hurt him unintentionally. You also couldn’t stop thinking about a possibility of all that could’ve been if you took off the rose tinted glasses through which you saw Chan, even once.
“Maybe this is my punishment Minho. I kept hurting you, just as much as I kept getting hurt. I kept blaming Chan in my head but what’s the difference between him and I, when I did the same to you?”
He immediately shook his head and held you by the shoulders with so much resolve that it compelled you to stop rambling and listen to him.
“There’s a lot of differences between the two of you. You never gave me any mixed signals, you never played push and pull with my emotions, you always knew what you wanted; I was the one hurting because I couldn’t let go of you. Our situation is different than Chan and yours. How were you to know that I felt this way about you when I kept my distance? But you’ve to understand that I was reserved because I was scared about the intensity of my love towards you, even when we had so much space between us. What would’ve happened if I didn’t push myself out of the frame? Would that have been better for the two of us?"
As you looked at his doe eyes that reflected the depth of his soul, you knew for sure, that this man right here would’ve been able to break through all your walls of false hopes and easily made you love him, perhaps more than you’ve ever loved anyone.
“Maybe!”
“Maybe!”
Both of you nodded and whispered in a silent agreement but refused to let of each other, needing to believe that this moment was true, that it was really happening.
“Then would you wait a little more for me?”
You could see the glimmer of hope in his eyes that he squashed with confusion, not wanting to get disappointed for hoping about something that he long gave up on without even trying but you were determined to not hurt and get hurt anymore. Maybe this was a new beginning for you, for him and for Chan.
“Wait for what?”
You took a deep breath and clutched his hand that was still unknowingly caressing the back of your neck.
“Please wait for me to get over my heartbreak and let me get to know you as something more than just friends. I know what I’m asking of you is a bit selfish but I don’t want to treat you as a rebound, as a replacement of what I couldn’t have, as an outlet of my heartbreak. I want us to be real and our beginning shouldn’t be formed on the basis of my negative baggage. You deserve the best and while I may not be the best, I want to be at least my best for you; for us.”
His beaded eyes shone with something that you couldn’t really place but you knew that you could travel to the end of the world if it meant that his eyes would shine like that.
“I’ve waited for you when there wasn’t any hope or reason to. Imagine how long I could wait for you now that you’ve given me a reason to.”
Yes, you were definitely a fool to not notice this pure hearted man who might not have stood by your side but always around you, silently protecting you and loving you without expecting anything in return. But what you did notice was how you liked this kind of crying where you couldn’t even stop smiling at each other, especially when his bunny smile looked so endearing on him.
And as you both wrapped each other around in an intimate lovers’ hold you finally felt contentment, as if the last piece of a huge complicated puzzle finally snapped in place. You pressed your nose in his shirt, letting his scent comfort you and could already feel yourself wanting to drift off to somewhere only you and him existed.
While it may have been harder to not love Chan, you think it may be criminal to not love Minho.
What you both didn’t notice was a pair of eyes in the corner of the yard, observing you two since the beginning, overwhelmed but feeling a crack in his heart that he never even imagined he would. Were new beginnings supposed to make your heart twist like that?
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starstruckodysseys · 15 days
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the thing about fhjy ending is that like. the promo dropped september 26th. it was like my fourth week of high school and second week of college. i still vividly remember freaking out about it in my high school library at 8am but trying to be cool in the process.
the proper trailer came out december 13th. luckily i was at home this time, but i remember shrieking and flailing and giggling like the biggest loser imaginable, because i was so goddamn excited. thank god i was home alone.
the first episode came out january 10th. i watched it about half an hour after it dropped, because i was at bowling practice when it actually did, and between coming home and getting dinner, i was a little late. i watched with the biggest grin on my face and live blogged the entire thing.
and now it’s may 22nd, and i just finished watching the finale. i loved it, obviously. i went on a roller coaster of emotions that surprisingly didn’t end with me fully sobbing, though it got pretty damn close. i laughed and i teared up and i cheered and i kept that same goofy little smile on my face most of the time.
i graduate in two weeks. this show has been with me for basically my entire senior year - through my entire bowling season, the musical i state managed and the play i helped create, every college application and subsequent admission, my actual college selection, every single dumb little thing you have to do when you’re a high school senior. in a way, i can’t separate fantasy high junior year from my own real life senior year.
it sounds cheesy, i know, but this season has really meant a lot to me. it’s strange now that it’s ending. i don’t really know what to do, now. focus on whatever never stop blowing up is, i guess.
i still love the bad kids forever, by the way. even if we aren’t going to see them in action for the next god knows how many years. they’re very dear to my heart. that isn’t changing any time soon.
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porcelainseashore · 5 months
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Teenage Headache Dreams (4)
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Series Masterlist
Pairing: High School! College! Leon Kennedy x Dancer! Fem! Reader
Summary: You’re a bored, but ambitious high school student who can’t wait to escape small town life and make it in the big city. You thought you had it all figured out, until you unwittingly befriend the resident golden boy, Leon. A series of events beginning from junior year to college until Resident Evil 2 Remake.
Warnings: 18+ Swearing, Recreational Drug Use, Eventual Smut, No (Y/N), Ambiguous/Open Ending
Content: High School AU, College AU, Pre-Resident Evil 2, Fluff, Romance, Cliche, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Lack of Communication
Author's Note: Things get heated in both senses of the word… I toned it down here, but the final chapter will go further 😉 I have to say this chapter was a bit of an unruly beast, but I hope it worked out in the end. Expect some angst and as usual, fluff.
AO3 Link
Chapter 4: Different Dreams
Since that wintry night in February which left you reeling from having kissed your best friend, you never found the opportunity to speak with him on where you both stood. Things just kept getting in the way: preparing for junior year finals, college admission tests, then summer placements and so on. To be fair, you weren’t exactly keen on confronting the question either, since you still weren’t sure whether you and Leon would be in the same place after graduating from high school. You had long since crossed the river of denial and you liked him a lot, but you were selfish. If you had to choose between a relationship with him and Tisch School of the Arts, the one college you had always dreamed of going to since you were young, you knew you’d pick the latter in a heartbeat. And that fucked you up. You couldn’t help but feel guilty each time he tried to broach the subject of “that night”, and when you brushed him off, he didn’t get upset or push it. He just waited patiently as ever, with a hopeful look in his eyes, that someday you’d be ready to talk. 
Maybe it was just better to remain as friends. That said, you were there for him as one. You supported him, teasing through the countless college possibilities he had swimming around in his mind, after he returned from the school’s career counselor. When the local police force had come round to give one of their recruitment talks, he seemed to have taken an interest in their work. In particular, their speech about directly interacting with and helping civilians in times of need really resonated with him. Although you were wary about cops in general, questioning the punishment system and incidences of police brutality, you encouraged him to follow what felt right to him.
As you sat together with him on his bed, littered with a bunch of police academy brochures that were sprawled across the covers, he went through the reasons that led him to make this choice, and you began to connect the dots. “Remember when you said that I’m a good person?”
“Yeah?” You perked up.
“Well, I just wondered how I could be more of that,” he explained.
Did he feel like he needed to prove himself, just so he could believe in it? You were dying to tell him that he didn’t have to do all of this. That he was perfect the way he was. But sometimes people just needed to go through the motions themselves. This was his journey to make, so you bit back your tongue and listened.
“I want to help regular people, like you and me. Protecting the innocent, changing their lives for the better…” He stared into space for a while before continuing. “And what about all the unsolved cases? Those families deserve closure.”
You realized that closure from the past was something he never had.
“I mean, I just want to make a difference somehow,” he reiterated.
“Hm, that sounds stupid, doesn’t it?” He remarked sheepishly, constantly glancing at you for your opinion.
“No… no, not at all.” You shook your head, reassuring him sincerely. “Well, you know I don’t have the best impression of cops,” you laughed. “But that will change, with you.”
“You think so?” A slight smile formed at the corners of his mouth.
You leaned back against the mattress on your forearms and confirmed. “Hell, Leon. If there’s such a thing as a model police officer, I think you’re gonna be that.”
“There isn’t a single bad bone in your body.” You winked. “Not vouching for the lame ones though.”
“Gee, thanks.” He was blushing now as he twiddled his thumbs.
“I take it that you’re gonna enjoy helping old ladies cross the road?” You couldn’t resist teasing him when he looked like that.
“Sure, you know you can call on me anytime.” He smirked.
You forgot he had a knack for winding you up. “Fuck you, Leon!”
“Oh yeah?” He challenged, although you could tell from his expression that he was only half-kidding.
That stopped you in your tracks, as a mental image of you and Leon in various intimate positions formed in your mind. You swallowed hard, feeling a burning sensation of arousal surging within. Despite that, you shrugged off those thoughts and picked up one of the brochures lying in the pile to distract yourself. “So, you’re gonna visit the open house?”
You heard what sounded like a disheartened sigh before he replied, “Yeah I’d like to.” He turned to face you expectantly. “It’d be nice, if uh, you came along?”
“They’re all pretty nearby,” he added, trying to sweeten the deal. As if you needed convincing.
You rolled your eyes, exclaiming, “Even if it was a gazillion miles away, I’d still be there.”
Echoing his previous sentiment at the time he had supported you at your performance, you mentioned naively, “That’s what friends are for, right?”
When you caught him wincing and tightening up at the word “friends”, you realized the blunder you had made, but it was too late.
He stood up silently and made his way over to his desk, busying himself with a stack of papers.
That hand-wringing sensation of guilt started to swell in your chest again. You opened your mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Finally, you got up to leave. “Just let me know when, ok?”
He nodded his head in acknowledgement, without turning around to see you off. You walked out of his room with your eyes downcast, trying to console yourself that it was for the best. The police academies he had singled out weren’t even remotely near New York. There was no way it would work out. No way.
━━━━━━━━━━━
You accompanied Leon to the open houses that summer, as he got a good look around the various campuses, asking inquisitive questions and highlighting his athletic achievements, albeit rather humbly. After some nudging from you, he began to mention his academics too. You always held his intelligence in high regard, which you had noticed in class and during your study sessions, that were miraculously still going on despite his earlier reluctance. In your opinion, he would make a great detective, though he had tried to downplay it when you shared it with him.
In any case, you should’ve known that it never ends well when unresolved things are left to fester. So here you were, in your room this time, having the biggest argument you’ve ever encountered with Leon so far.
It all started when you were grabbing something quick from your shelf, before heading out with Leon for a walk along the surrounding forest trails, just so you could make the best use of the remaining summer days. He’d waited around the entrance to your room when something piqued his interest. Walking in, he pointed at a makeshift board lying by your bedside. “Jeez, what’s this? An evidence board or something?”
Whipping your head around, you laughed, “It’s to keep track of all the colleges I’m applying to, dumbass.”
Resting his fingers under his chin, he tilted his head and noted without hiding his disappointment, “They���re kinda far away.” 
“And this one.” He pointed to the red circle in the middle. “That’s your dream school, huh?” At least he remembered. Not like you hadn’t been going on about it for ages.
“Yeah, since I was little.” You nodded, taking a couple of steps closer, till you joined Leon at his side. A moment of doubt set in, as you shrugged and chewed your lip nervously. “I don’t know if I’m good enough.”
“You’re more than good enough,” he stated simply, in a tone deeper than usual. It reverberated across the room as he eyed you intently. 
“I’ve watched you-” He pulled you in close, wrapping an arm around your waist, which elicited a small gasp from your lips. “Perform.” His other hand trailed up to caress your cheek.
“Choreograph,” he continued, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “Teach.” He smiled fondly at the memory of picking you up from class one day, as the little ballerinas you taught gathered around your legs quizzing, Miss, is that your boyfriend? 
Meanwhile, it felt like your brain was malfunctioning, as you stood frozen on the spot, losing yourself in the pool of his ocean blue eyes, while he issued you compliment after compliment, finally finishing with, “You’re incredibly talented.”
Stroking his thumb gently over your bottom lip, his gaze followed suit, transfixed by its outline. Checking for any signs of discomfort on your face but finding none, he leaned in, planting his mouth on yours, as an involuntary moan escaped from your throat. No matter how much you tried to fight it, your body would not lie. It craved his touch, and all at once, you threw out the barriers you had placed between yourself and Leon in the past few months.
Sliding your hands up his chest, you parted your lips slightly to allow his tongue to slip inside. The kisses grew hungrier and more urgent as you tasted each other, causing you to stumble backwards onto your bed with him laying on top of you. You were so glad your parents were out, as the door to your bedroom was wide open and both of you weren’t exactly keeping very quiet about things. He peppered kisses along your neck, as his hands roamed across your body. Then his lips traveled downwards to your chest and you tangled your hands tightly in his hair, cursing his name in pleasure under your breath.
There were countless thoughts running through your head, like how fast you and Leon were going, and how badly you wanted him, but something was screaming inside of you about how wrong all of this was. You were just friends, right? You shouldn’t be leading him on like this.
With whatever resolve you had left, you tore yourself away and pushed him off you, stammering, “I’m sorry, I can’t!” You were shaking uncontrollably as Leon regarded you with a mixture of worry and confusion, panting heavily through his swollen, red lips.
“Wha-? Are you ok? Did I hurt you?” The questions came out like rapid fire.
“I-I’m fine.” You looked down in embarrassment as you adjusted your clothes.
“Then, what’s wrong?” His brows were knitted in distress, wondering if he had unknowingly crossed your boundaries.
“I just don’t think this is such a good idea,” you offered hesitantly.
Running his hand through the mess you had made of his silky blonde hair, he sighed, “Why? What about that night?” There it was again.
You bit your lip apprehensively. “We never followed up on that.”
As his face contorted in anguish, you knew that your time of delaying the inevitable had run out, and he wasn’t going to let it go now. “It was like you never wanted me to bring it up.” He began to raise his voice, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “I gave you months… Months!”
“It’s… complicated,” you whispered.
“How?” He asked, bristling with irritation.
“Well, for starters, we’re gonna be living miles apart by the time we finish high school.”
“You don’t know that,” he countered, crossing his arms firmly, as if shielding himself from being let down again.
“What do you mean?” You blurted out in bewilderment.
By now, he had gotten up and paced around your room restlessly. “You could… I don’t know, go to one of the bigger cities around here. I heard Chicago’s got a pretty good-”
You felt a flash of annoyance as you cut him off instantly. “You know I’ve wanted to go to Tisch my whole life!”
“I don’t understand you!” He choked, shaking his head furiously. “You’d travel miles with me to the academies, but you can’t even think of doing this long distance?” 
He was grasping at straws to keep you, but you didn’t want to hurt him. You didn’t know if you were right for each other. In your mind, Leon was a bit of a homebody, judging by the college choices he had made. He needed someone who could provide him with stability and the white picket fence American dream. You couldn’t do that. You wanted to travel the world and live out new experiences.
As you hugged yourself wordlessly, unable to look at him, he softened, once again trying to reason things out. “I just thought… we mattered too.”
Your heart broke as he said that. You wanted nothing more than warmth and intimacy with him on this lazy Sunday, cuddling and trading affectionate kisses. But you couldn’t. “You do matter to me, Leon.”
“Then why do you keep pushing me away?” There was no more anger in his voice, only sadness.
He deserved an answer, and you would give him one. You just didn’t expect to be so inept at choosing how to express yourself. “We both have our own dreams,” you tried to explain. “They’ve just turned out to be very different.” 
The next line came out a lot harsher than you intended. “I can’t have someone holding me back. I’m sorry.”
Before regret could even sink in, Leon had started to take his leave, his expression turning colder than ice. “No, I’m sorry for even trying,” he commented bitterly. “I’ll stop wasting your time.”
“Leon!” You called out after him, but he paid no attention and continued to walk off. “It came out wrong,” you pleaded. “That’s not what I meant!”
The last thing you heard was your front door slamming shut.
━━━━━━━━━━━
Over the next weeks when senior year started, you tried to reach out to Leon to no avail. He had become a distant shell of his former self. There was an air of aloofness each time you bumped into each other, as he pretended not to recognize you. All the notes you attempted to pass to him in class ended up crumpled and thrown into the bin without being read. You felt a stab to your gut every single time.
However, you were observant enough to make out the sting of hurt in his eyes when he thought you weren’t looking. You knew he was keeping you at an arm’s length to protect himself, but also partly to give you a taste of your own medicine, just like when you had foolishly dragged things on, hoping they would resolve themself without giving him an answer. Until it was too late. You hated him for being so immature and childish, but you held yourself responsible for starting it first.
Then, the rumors came. You saw him with that girl, Val?, again. They were doing the things you used to do together before the fallout. It made you sick to your stomach, but you said nothing. Maybe you deserved all of this, you thought.
“Lattes after class?” Kayla’s chirpy voice snapped you out of your reverie.
“Hm?” You weren’t really in the mood, but you tried your best to smile through it.
“They brought in the pumpkin spice ones early this season! Can you believe it?” She giggled excitedly, throwing her arm around your shoulder as she proceeded to whisper into your ear, “Come on, you and I need some girl-to-girl talk.”
As you made your way towards the cafe, you caught sight of Leon with his arm around Val on the other side of the street. Kayla wrinkled her nose at them, as she quickened her pace, pulling you along. “Smooth, real smooth, Kennedy,” she muttered under breath.
Whilst it was comforting to know you had someone who supported you through this - something which you didn’t expect, not least from Kayla - you were flung into the center of drama and gossip again. 
Clink. Kayla placed both cups of coffee on the table as she sat down, adjusting her mini skirt before turning to face you attentively. “Spill it.”
You shrugged, glancing around awkwardly.
She tried prompting you at first, “Did he break up with you?” No answer.
“He did something stupid.” No answer.
“Oh my god, he cheated on you, didn’t he?” She accused melodramatically, such that a couple of customers in the cafe glowered over in displeasure at the noise.
You slapped a palm against your forehead and cringed. “Kayla, please.”
“Oops, sorry.”
You sighed, deciding that perhaps it would do some good to open up a little, instead of keeping things to yourself all the time. “It was me. I fucked up, ok?”
“Bullshit,” she scoffed. “It always takes two to tango.” She checked out her manicured nails for a second before continuing, “And even if he was the sweet angel as you claim he is, he sure is fucking it up spectacularly now.”
You raised an eyebrow. Strong choice of words. “Look, we were never really together. I mean, we did some things-” You paused, swallowing anxiously. “-friends don’t usually do.” 
She gave you a knowing smirk, gesturing at you to continue.
“I told him…” At this, your voice cracked, “I didn’t want him, Kayla.” Your mouth quivered, as stray tears welled up in the corners of your eyes.
“Oh, babe,” she cooed. “But you do, don’t you?” She placed her hand over yours understandingly.
You weren’t used to crying, especially not out in the open like this. You pulled away from Kayla, wiping the tears away roughly with the back of your hand, as you straightened up and put on the same facade you always do. “It doesn’t matter anyway. He’s with Val-”
Immediately, Kayla scowled. “That girl has some nerve! I knew it,” she spat. “Always waiting in the sidelines to bag your man.”
“It’s not her fault!” You protested. As far as you were concerned, you and Leon hadn’t made any promises to each other. He was free to go out with whoever he wanted.
Kayla rolled her eyes, “I’m sure she couldn’t wait one hot minute.”
“If that’s the case, then Leon should’ve waited too, right?” You argued. If you had to go along with this warped way of reasoning with her, then so be it. 
“Fair enough,” she conceded, though you could tell that she wasn’t exactly happy about the outcome, and you wanted to put a stop to whatever mean girl prank she had up her sleeve. 
“I’m serious. Don’t,” you warned.
She threw up her hands in mock surrender. “Ok, Miss Party Pooper… I won’t do anything to her. I swear!”
━━━━━━━━━━━
It took you a while to realize what Kayla’s actual plan of action was. In her typical fashion, it was loud, flashy and drew the attention of the whole school. It happened during lunch break in one of the weeks following your girl talk. You had seated yourself with the rest of the cheer team at the cafeteria, when you saw her slam her cutlery down on the table, snarling, “That’s it. I’ve had enough of this shit!”
The rest of the girls including you stared at her in shock, as she stormed up to where the other sports teams usually sat. She made a beeline for the blonde boy whom you’d been moping about for most of the term now, situating herself between him and his latest flame. You couldn’t hear what she was saying, but it made Val scurry off, before she and Leon entered into some sort of shouting match. You only managed to make out bits and pieces of it.
“What the fuck’s your problem?”
“Let me guess, the classy rebound-” Slow clap.
“Stay out of it-”
“You’re the one causing trouble!”
The next minute, she pointed at you, motioning to come over. Leon’s eyes grew dark, giving you a withering glare as you walked towards them with a mix of reluctance and unease. You despised being singled out like this, but you needed to put an end to running away from your problems.
Once you had made your way over, Kayla, who was seemingly pretty satisfied herself, barked out an order, “You two, just sort it out! It’s driving me insane.”
When she left the table and the curious onlookers - which meant literally everyone in the cafeteria - had decided to resume back to whatever they were doing, you uttered the first words to Leon in a long time, “Well, that was awkward.”
“You don’t say.”
“Listen, I’m sorry. I didn’t know she would get like that,” you admitted.
He still held his guard up as he regarded you stoically. “So what did you want to talk about?”
You sighed, hoping you would do better this time. But there was just so much to say. Where to start? “I just wanted apologize for what I said that day,” you treaded cautiously. “I miss you, Leon.” You were getting glassy-eyed again, but you braved on. “And I still really care about you.”
His lips were pinched together as he considered your words. He had his reservations, but his hard gaze was slowly faltering. For a while, he didn’t respond. Just as you thought you had overstayed your welcome, he piped up almost inaudibly, “I care, too.”
You nodded in response and took your leave. You knew things would never be the same again, but this was enough for now.
━━━━━━━━━━━
The atmosphere between you and Leon remained tense, but at least it was amicable now. Apparently, Val was out of the picture. Nothing happened, they went on a date or two and Leon called it off. Well, that was what was going through the rumor mill anyway.
Still, it killed you inside, as it felt like you had lost a lover and a best friend. When you received your acceptance letter in December from Tisch, you didn’t even know whether to celebrate or not. Moreover, the one person you would have celebrated with was hardly in your life anymore. Kayla pushed you to tell Leon regardless, and you started to think maybe you had the wrong impression of some of your schoolmates after all. They did seem to look out for you, in their own weird way. It was like reading Pride and Prejudice all over again.
That’s what brought you in front of Leon’s front door, as you rang the doorbell in anticipation. You flinched as the door opened. The corridor was bathed in a warm, golden glow as the light filtered through the doorway, partly blocked by Leon, who peered out at you curiously. “Hi.”
“Hi,” you called out timidly. God, it was like you were strangers again. “Um, can I come in?”
“S-sure.” He held the door open for you, as you took in your surroundings. It had been months since you’d last visited, but nothing much had changed.
“So… what can I do for you?” He stuffed his hands in his pockets, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. You weren’t used to this formal way of addressing each other. It gave you goosebumps.
“I thought it was only right to let you know,” you started. Your hands were trembling as you held out a thick white envelope towards Leon. “I-I got in.”
He took the envelope in his hands, frowning as he opened it. As he glanced over the papers, a spark of recognition shone in his eyes. “Oh! Uh-” He looked like he was at a loss for words as a wave of conflicting emotions washed over him. “Congratulations! I guess.”
“Thanks.” You nipped at your lip lightly, wondering if your next question would be appropriate. “Can I have a hug?”
For a fleeting instant, he looked like a deer in the headlights, but then he got a hold of himself. “Y-yeah.”
It took both of you a good minute to navigate your way into an embrace, so much so you nearly laughed at the ridiculousness of the situation. But once you were in each other’s arms, you relaxed, breathing in his familiar scent that you grew to love. “I missed this,” he sighed blissfully into your hair. You deepened the embrace, pulling him closer to you.
“I guess I should also tell you…” He pressed his lips to the side of your forehead as he spoke, “I’m heading to the police academy in Springfield.”
Your heart leapt out of joy and ached with melancholy at the same time. “That’s fantastic! I’m so proud of you, Leon.”
“Mm, you always know how to make me feel…” his words faded off as he broke away from your arms, but held your gaze, as if asking, “What now?”
Maybe this was your chance for the heart-to-heart that was long overdue. And you grabbed it with both hands.
“I was scared,” you started. “I didn’t know how it could work out with the distance, maybe even performing internationally…” After a brief pause, you revealed, “I thought you wanted the suburban dream.”
“When did I ever say that?” He blurted out, with a look of shock plastered across his face.
You flinched, realizing that he had a point. He never mentioned wanting that. These doubts you had appeared to stem from your own fears projected onto him. “I-I thought…” You trailed off, not knowing what else to say.
“You could’ve asked me,” he replied, seemingly perturbed from the misunderstanding that occurred between the two of you. “I really wished we talked about this.”
Your eyes dropped to the ground, as you felt a heavy weight in your chest. “I’m sorry, I just assumed it was the case.” At this, he grasped his forehead in his hands and sighed wearily.
This was all so stupid. But you needed to tell him exactly how you felt about him, especially after this wake-up call. “Leon, hear me out, please? When I lost you, I realized I was so caught up with running as far away as I could from this place, that I didn’t see how important being with you was to me.”
You forced down a lump in your throat as you continued, “You never held me back, I was wrong to say that.”
“I want you,” you confessed. “Always have.”
You felt completely exposed, as if every part of you was laid bare and open to scrutiny. “I just had to let you know, even if you don’t feel the same way about me anymore.”
As you folded your arms to brace yourself for what would come next, Leon reached out and caressed your hair comfortingly. “I-” he paused. “If this is about Val, I’m sorry I did that,” he apologized. “I was hurt, and it wasn’t fair to either of you.”
Placing his fingers under your chin, he lifted it to bring you within eye contact. “However, I need you to stop guessing what you think I might want,” he stated firmly. “I can make my own decisions, ok?”
As you nodded in agreement, his gaze softened, and he took you within his arms again, cradling your head against his chest. “And… you haven’t lost me, but I need some time.” He sighed. “This was all just-”
At that moment, you were interrupted by his mom, who’d made her way in from the living room. “Gosh, it’s been a while, hasn’t it?”
You and Leon let go of each other self-consciously, as she spontaneously invited you to dinner with the family that evening, which had just been freshly cooked and served out on the dining table. As you shared in the laughter and light-hearted conversations together, you couldn’t help but feel a sliver of hope about your future with the boy sitting beside you.
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Prom night was coming up. At least that was what Kayla kept reminding you. You still had a few months to prepare, but for her it was the most important social event of high school. No one had asked you out yet, and Kayla felt that wouldn’t do. Secretly, you wished Leon would have made a move by now, but maybe things were still too raw.
As you emptied out your locker, you felt a tap on your shoulder. Spinning around, you brushed up against one of the footballers you had hardly spoken with during your school years. He must have noticed the bemusement on your face, as he spoke first, “Wanna go to the prom with me?”
From afar, you heard a distant giggle and narrowed your eyes at the source. Kayla’s sly grin gave it away. She set the whole thing up. Why?
You glanced between her and the beefy guy in front of you. Clearly not your type. At all. “Uh…” you tried to stall, wondering how you were going to maneuver your way out of this situation.
Suddenly, a figure emerged from the side, snaking an arm around your waist, causing you to yelp in surprise. “She’s coming with me.” You’d recognize that voice anywhere.
Hm, this was getting interesting. Talk about Mr Knight in Shining Armor to the rescue.
Leon turned to face you. “Am I right?”
“Y-yeah, I’d like-,” you paused to recollect yourself. “I’m going with you,” you confirmed with a hint of shyness.
The footballer backed off, raising his hands in the air as he excused himself clumsily. “Sorry man, my bad. I didn’t know she was taken.” Leon was giving him the stink eye all the way through.
“You trying to make me jealous, baby?”
Baby? You gulped. What the hell has gotten into him? You couldn’t tell if he was joking or not. But his arm was still resting on your waist with no intention of letting go anytime soon.
You saw Kayla shrug and dust her hands, before sashaying away. You had to hand it to her though. Fucking mastermind genius.
“Well, you never asked.”
“I did now,” he retorted smugly.
Ok, so you were back to bantering. Guess you could deal. But it still didn’t answer the question on where you stood with him. Had he finalized his thoughts since that talk you had?
“Leon,” you sighed. “Is this your way of saying you’d like to make things official?”
“Sorry about that. I was kinda put on the spot,” he admitted bashfully, as if he had been caught doing something wrong and now had a tail between his legs. 
“But yeah, I want to,” he professed. “Do you?” He stared at you, swallowing nervously. “I mean, would you like to be my, uh- girlfriend?”
You gave him a coy smile, copying one of his previous lines in response. “Sure, I suck at it. So why not?”
“Never know till you try.” He beamed in return, unable to conceal the sheer look of happiness on his face any longer. “Guess we can figure out the rest along the way.”
“Uh huh.” You glanced around, all of a sudden painfully aware that you both were having this conversation in full public view. Although the other students were pretending not to pay attention, you knew they had seen and overheard everything. 
A hot flush rose to your face. It didn’t seem to deter Leon as he tugged you closer with a twinkle of mischief in his eyes. You had an inkling of what was about to unfold, but you chose to embrace it.
“Let’s give them a show, shall we?” He smirked, and with that, his lips collided into yours, as you made out against the lockers, oblivious to the world around you.
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clowncarr · 4 months
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as someone who is in their first year of college and has gone through the tumultuous process of american college applications, fhjy is so brutal bc like 😭 yeah! you can literally be the elven oracle, and still have to put yourself in debt, and jump through all the hoops and moving goalposts and still not get to where you want—
you could have part time celestial reconnaissance agent + 2x saver of the country/also whole world on your application and whatever snooty, highly selective just trying to lower their admission rate institution will ask you about being more wellrounded like?? what are your expectations of 16 year olds 😭. juniors and seniors in hs will literally fucking burn themselves out revolutionizing the world just to get into a university is that not insane
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AITA for not telling a close friend about a concert?
(🥀emoji to find this)
I (16F) have multiple different friend groups at my school, and of these groups, the two girls I’m closest with are “Rose “(18F) and “Gale”(16F). As long as they've known each other, Rose and Gale have never really gotten along due to their personalities clashing. (Gale thinks Rose is bitchy and Rose thinks Gale is overbearing. There’s other, more minor stuff, but that’s the general summary.) They don’t talk or hang out unless I ask both of them to be at an event with me. It’s also important to note that Gale is in my grade(HS junior), but Rose is a senior, and this is the last year that I will be going to school with her since she has college next year.
Last summer, the three of us went to a concert together for an artist we all love, and while it was really fun overall, there was this constant underlying tension between the two of them. At the end, they nearly got into a stupid fight (I was waiting in a merch line alone and don't know the details), but the majority of the time they were civil. They both told me privately afterwards that while they had a really fun time, they wished the other person hadn’t been there. I understand that they’re both entitled to their own feelings about the other, and while I wish they got along better, I know there isn’t really anything I can do to get them to get along, so I’ve tried to limit the occurrences where the three of us might all be at the same event.
It just so happens that the artist we went to see is doing another tour next summer, and Rose and I were hanging out at school when the announcement dropped. We immediately went to check out where the nearest venue the artist was playing at was, and it’s a stadium tour. This is important because the last time we saw this artist, they were performing at an outdoor general admissions space, so tickets were significantly cheaper. The stadium tour cost roughly double the amount we paid last time for our general admission tickets ($62.50 each for the first concert and ~$130 each for this one), and it was much harder to get tickets in a good section that were next to each other without going broke. We also had to keep prices in mind because I was going to be buying the tickets for us with my parents' credit card, and Rose, who only carries cash and doesn't have credit card access, would be paying me back in cash. My parents warned me ahead of time that they'd be annoyed if we spent too much on the tickets, so we had to make sure we didn't overspend.
Because of this, Rose and I made the decision that we would only get tickets for ourselves and not tell Gale, with our decision being motivated half by the cost and half by the fact that Rose does not want to go with Gale. The concert is now almost entirely sold out, and resale prices will cost you a minimum of 300 bucks for one ticket in our seat section. We haven’t told anyone we know about this except for the other three people in our friend group and two seniors we are casual friends with who got tickets to the same concert. Gale wasn’t at school that day, so she didn’t hear any of the conversations Rose and I had about the concert at school. Since this concert is over the summer, it’s also probably going to be one of the last major activities Rose and I will be able to do together before she goes off to college next year.
I might be the asshole in this situation because I know Gale would have LOVED to come to the concert and has expressed wanting to see that artist again in the past, but I intentionally didn’t tell her about it because of the money and her negative relationship with Rose. AITA for not telling Gale?
What are these acronyms?
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edutainer2022 · 6 months
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@astranite About the PROM PROTOCOL from this thread . It's a Sky and Star headcanon very dear to my heart. I'm so glad you found it! 💙🧡
The PROM PROTOCOL is a story I really hope to write out some day. But if I never do, the general outline is as follows: think the Kansas farmhouse front porch, around past midnight. There's a figure on a porch swing - Jeff. Waiting up. Steps crunch the gravel and stop to an abrupt halt by the porch. Scott hasn't been expecting Dad to wait up for him like this. Scott is past his curfew.
The party had been a long and ardorous negotiation - Jeff was weary, because springbreak and highschool seniors (and juniors) usually equals underage drinking and recreational edibles or pot, or who knows what else, especially if somebody's college freshman sibling is doing the chaperoning. Scott was adamant and made a good case of being the most responsible and reliable sixteen year old in the history of ever - youngest President of the class, Prom King nominee, Team captain and projected valedictorian at the graduation (early graduation for him, because he worked his a** off over summers taking extra AP credit and got early admission to Yale), consummate big brother. Besides, he promised to take Stacey the Girlfriend to THE springbreak party. Surprisingly, Virgil and John chimed in on Scott's side with a good case too - he deserved a night off, as big brother had nearly run himself to the ground the years Mom was gone, while Jeff buried himself in grief and more work. Jeff doesn't enjoy thinking back on the boy's translucent pale face on the hospital sheets and the drip of IV in the deafening silence. Jeff gets the reasoning, but he's not ready. Not ready for Scott to be growing up and leaving for college (John soon to follow, skipping a class the genius his ginger is), not ready for things to change, not ready for the boys not needing him soon, not ready for Scott being serious to take up his Ivy League degree parallel to the AirForce program.
Anyhow, this one time Dad conceded and is now sitting up on the porch, waiting for the eldest to be back past the curfew, minutes away from rising up Kyrano to start a state-wide search and rescue. But Scott is walking back. WALKING. Jeff is absolutely certain the boy left in his car to pick up the girlfriend and then drive her back home. And to ensure there would be no succumbing to peer pressure to drink at the party. Jeff is ready to rain thunder and lightning, assuming that's what happened - drinking, smoking, something irresponsible.
But Scott is shivering in his windbreaker, hands deep in his pockets, face visibly stricken with tears. He walked all the way from the town to the farm in the middle of the night. Somebody's college freshman brother home on a break being far more alluring to the Prom Queen nominee is what happened. Vicious and biting, and humiliating words happened. First love crashing and burning in an instant is what happened. Scott was shaken too much and couldn't drive. So he walked all the way home.
Jeff manages to coax the boy up the porch, on a swing and into his lap. Quiet, hot tears are back. So help him, Jeff is not ready. That was to be Lucy's area - nursing bruises, kissing away booboos and heartbreak. Jeff is not ready. He wants to tell his boy there will never be pain and betrayal again. He wants to make sure there isn't. Ever. But he can't. Jeff wants to keep Scott and his brothers safe from any danger of the world. But he's not sure he can reliably ward off more heartbreak. So he just holds the crying child on the cusp of adulthood and wishes his wife were still there.
Scott is still grounded - he didn't call Dad to pick him up, and walking alone at night was very dangerous. He'd be grounded till the Prom (Jeff is not cruel enough to let the school have no Prom King). That's where the problem is, unexpectedly. Scott's not going. Stacey the ex girlfriend now has that college freshman as a Prom date to show off. Everyone would know he was dumped. He has no date and doesn't have the heart to go anymore. Jeff really, really wishes Lucy were there. He's out of his depth.
That's when the rustle on the porch roof happens and a lithe, agile form slithers expertly down to the rails. John. John, who too is not asleep. John, who was probably stargazing past his bedtime or too lowkey waiting up for his biggest brother. John would go with Scott to the Prom. John is graduating next winter, so will miss his own Prom - nobody will ask questions. That dries the tears, at least, and has Scott sit up from Dad's lap. John HATES social anything. It will be loud, and flashy, and crowded, and LOUD. John would be uncomfortable. Scott can't have that. Exactly! Everyone knows the Ginger Tracy hates that kind of scene. And everyone knows Scott always has a posse of little brothers. So, if Scott is too upset, or not having fun, or overwhelmed - nobody would bat an eye that he had to take the "ginger weirdo" back home. John is calm and completely logical - clearly he had it all thought through. But what if Scott is having a good time and John is uncomfortable at a big party?
That's when more rustle on the porch roof happens and a bleary eyed Virgil parcours down too. Jeff is more or less resigned that bedtime is just not a thing that day, apparently. In THAT case, Virgil is going to the Prom too. Everyone know his two brothers are graduating early, so they won't be around for his Prom. It's a sound cover up. If Scott is enjoying himself, but John needs to leave - Virgil would accompany him home and make sure he's not overestimulated by the noise and the crowd. And Virgil would still have his own Prom to go to next year, if he wanted a big ole party. And thus - The Prom Protocol is born.
In the end, it's a huddle on the porch swing - Jeff holding Scott curled up in his lap, John leaning into Dad's side, and a semi-asleep Virgil draped over Scott's still shivering form for warmth and comfort. Still, Jeff is not ready. Amazed by the bond his boys share, but not ready to let them go.
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eliteprepsat · 1 year
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Junior year is known to be the most important, challenging year of high school.
But that doesn’t mean it can’t be fun! You can no doubt handle it all in stride with a little organization and planning. Let’s take just a few minutes right now to smooth the road ahead with some guidelines that will help make your junior year a success.  
1. REMEMBER TO PRIORITIZE ACADEMIC EXCELLENCE 💯
I’m sure you’ve heard this more times than you ever wanted to, but with so much going on junior year, it’s worth continually checking that academic performance is staying a top priority. Your GPA is, after all, usually the largest factor in admissions decisions.
It is also a good idea to review your classes for next semester with a counselor to ensure you are meeting college admissions requirements while challenging yourself with the most rigorous classes you can reasonably handle. Colleges do look at your senior year class schedule too, so continue to be just as academically driven all the way to the finish line, senioritis and all.
2. PREPARE FOR STANDARDIZED TESTS
Next on the priority list is test score optimization. Even if you took the PSAT your sophomore year, take it again this year—this test can not only qualify you for the National Merit Scholarship program but also give you good practice for the SAT. If you haven’t done so already, figure out which dates you’ll want to take the actual SAT or ACT as well as SAT Subject Tests, and then devise a study plan to get you to your peak scores.  
3. MAKE A COLLEGE LIST 📋
With so many colleges to choose from, where do you start? First, consider your general preferences. Would you feel better at a large or small school? In a city, suburban, or rural setting? On the west coast, east coast, Hawaii, another country? Are there any specific academic programs or extracurricular offerings that are important to you?
You can explore college websites or college search sites like the College Board’s Big Future to find your personal college matches. Then plan campus visits to confirm which aspects in a college you get most excited about and which aspects you don’t care for. To get a feel for the campus culture, try walking around solo and/or take a guided tour. See if you can talk to any students or administrators to gather more up-to-date, inside information about the school.
4. TAKE YOUR EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES TO THE NEXT LEVEL  🥇
Since colleges tend to want dedicated, passionate students populating their campuses, they’re drawn to students who commit a significant amount of time to a few meaningful extracurricular activities. This dedication shows that students are pursuing a genuine interest and are willing to explore their potential in specific areas of expertise (which is generally more useful to the world than passively attending a bunch of different activities). Focus on one or two of your strongest interests and see how you can develop them further (be creative!).
5. START A SCHOLARSHIP SEARCH
The earlier you start looking for scholarships, the better chance you’ll have at getting more free money! Some scholarships are need-based (they depend on family income levels) and others are merit-based (they’re based on your academic or other achievements). Check fastweb.com for a current list of scholarships, and ask your counselor and perhaps your parents’ workplaces for other possible free-funds opportunities.
6. CONTACT RECOMMENDATION WRITERS
Check the websites of the colleges you are interested in to see if they require teacher and/or counselor recommendation letters. If so, you will want to plan ahead so you can figure out which teachers know you best and then give them ample time to write you a quality letter (especially before they’re barraged with requests from tons of other students).
7. SPEND YOUR SUMMERS WISELY
Taking advantage of summertime to get a job or internship or participate in an academic summer program will help you further explore your interests while boosting your college application. Do an online search or ask your counselor for resources and see what really piques your interest.
You can also take this time to begin drafting your college application essays. Starting on these early will reduce stress and give you more time to reflect on yourself and your life to produce strong responses.
The more you’re out there exploring, enjoying, and learning, the better prepared you will be for the coming years.
So go ahead and write down your plans and to-dos now, and you’ll have yourself a valuable key to less stress and more success. And, as always, don’t overlook or underestimate the power you have to include some enjoyment in it all!
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krsnaradhika · 14 days
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I'm going to fucking die trying to figure out the admission process of Mumbai's degree colleges and UG programmes. Somehow rowed through the junior college but I'm not surviving this one, folks ༎ຶ⁠‿⁠༎ຶ
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sw33tsnow · 3 months
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Sculpture and you
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Keegan x Artist!F!Reader (18+)
Summary: It was an accident which led to you both separation but Keegan knew how to fix his wrong doing, fixed it real good.
Warnings: NOT FOR MINORS, College!au: older!reader & younger!Keegan, mentions of injury, slight angst, fluff, heavy plot, smut: mommy!kink, desperate (?), swearing, footjob (m!receiving), oral (f!receiving), heavy praises, nipples play, mating press, unprotected sex (p in v), cum on stomach, etc. Wordcount: 8k1
NOTE(s):
I'M TERRIBLY APOLOGIZE FOR ANY GRAMMAR ERRS
Here are the paintings that've been mentioned in my writing: The Triumph of the Name of Jesus , Michelangelo’s titanic portrayal of the Old Testament Book of Genesis , Starry Night , Café Terrace At Night
So sorry for the wordcount ૮(˶╥︿╥)ა
Love equals a piece of artwork. It is brittle and prone to being damaged when it's initially incomplete, yet becomes remarkably solid when subjected to heat. But, it'll eventually shatter if you don't treasure it or put your mind to it well.
Situated on a nearby hill, your university is prominently displayed in the city flanked by the scent of damp soil and vibrant lush foliage that varies in shades depending on the seasons. A vast campus is formed on either side of the river that flows through the middle with the ever-present fog on the surface creating the most picturesque scenery you'd ever catch in your entire life. The majestic yet graceful architecture of seven buildings took years to design by the brilliant professors from all departments and to build, standing tall and proud like sentinels guarding your campus from all directions.
It could never be boastful to state that your university has a significant influence on the fine arts scene globally, and that you have worked so hard to succeed here.
The Visual Arts building - your course's tower, which housed the painting, drawing, and sculpture, was placed between the Architecture and Literature ones. That's quite convenient for you because, despite receiving excellent comments on your expertise and collaboration, you failed to get along with others in your course because nearly all of your buddies were Architecture department alumni. Perhaps that helped explain why you're sitting happily in the study hall which did not belong to your building, where from the librarian to the sophomores were so familiar with your constant presence that they didn't care to question.
However, you didn't show up to have fun this time. The theme for the architects' project was History and Religion and your bestfriend reached you because her junior had picked a topic closely related to the Visual Arts and required assistance.
"As an exemplary senior, I've to help my juniors as much as I can. Especially when it only costs three meals to repay the favor, right bestie?" And she batted her lashes at you, only to get a nod of approval from you to escape the cringeness that she offered. 
Since your closest friend chose the construction of the Kölner Dom, a stunning specimen of Gothic architecture, as her topic, you must admit that you were a little dubious about this proposal. Architecture's learners do not show interest in any particular paintings, drawings, or sculptures. What fascinates them are the construction, the length of time the projects require to develop, the value and backstory.....blah blah blah, so much dull information that you couldn't help but groan each time she babbled into your ear.
Until you met Keegan.
He was a freshman, passed the tensing admission of your college four months ago. On the opening day, there was one pastime that the girls of all faculties had in common: gushing on the new students. Although you're not one of them, the seemingly never-ending parties and overwhelming adoration towards outstanding individuals undoubtedly added to the widespread fervor for Keegan. 
A picture is worth a thousand words.
The boy had deep blue eyes and a remarkable height, he even had to bend down when going through the doors. You mistakenly thought he was a model because with that attractive visage and that masculine jawline, not to mention that his sturdy yet slim waist and protruding chest muscles were flaunted beautifully in a simple black T-shirt tucked into matching trousers. Silver belt buckle and chain necklace swing rhythmically with each step he took, the leather backpack hanging off one shoulder and those Timberland boots; it's awkward knowing that the keen eyes and meticulousness you inherited from your mother and have utilized primarily in your studies has proven to be so beneficial.
"Keeg, over here" One of the group's friends yelled.
The dark head spun around, his eyes shone like a lost child who had just found his siblings. He marched over to your table and took a seat opposite to you right away. Much to your surprise, Keegan’s quite reserved, which is pleasant for you because at least the boy still has something in common with those who constantly have a pair of thick glasses glued to their face; and because you’re pretty bad at dealing with arrogant punks.   
Impressively, not focusing on gigantic and iconic geometric features, Keegan has picked two of the finest ceiling decorations in Rome. 
“I still can't decide between The Sistine Chapel and The Gesù, so I need your advice. You don't mind, right?”
Attentive and respectful. He was probing your expression, as if didn't want you to feel uncomfortable working with him.
"Of course not"
Keegan grumbled softly at hearing your courteous response and turned away to retrieve his laptop from his rucksack.
"Uhm hmm, not yet" Your best friend murmured, prompting you to turn and stare at her with a puzzled frown.
Then the boy took out his laptop, and instead of the original casing, there was the well-known Starry Night painting by the begetter Vincent Van Gogh.
"Did you draw that?" Pointing at the case, the corners of your mouth curved up and your eyes widened slightly in amusement. 
"Ah, yes.....this's just my own taste cus I'm not really drawn to Picasso's blocks and color scheme nor adopt the surrealism like Salvador Dalí" Genuinely he spoke, "Do you also like Van Gogh as well?"
Raising your eyebrows before flipping the phone onto a table over, the drawing of Café Terrace At Night was likewise repainted on your phone case. That successfully earned a comfortable chuckle from Keegan, and you casted a innuendo glance at your best friend, who was already beaming mischievously at you.
From his penchant for style to his distinct standpoint on artists to the two religious structures he opted for as the focus of his task, Keegan has more surprises than you expect from him. There also did not appear to be a disagreement between your ideas, since your aesthetic preferences were clearly comparable.
The venue that he selected was Rome, also referred to as the Eternal City. Any discussion on ceiling paintings in this ‘never-ending array of fabulous churches and palaces’ city must start with what is arguably the most well-known artwork in art history: Michelangelo’s titanic portrayal of the Old Testament Book of Genesis. It’s hard to envision the sheer scale of the work of 175 separate pictorial fields containing over 300 monumental figures, including thundering prophets, ancient seers and statuesque nudes, also known as ignudi, framing the central narratives of the creation of the world. At the very centre of this epic biblical narrative is the most iconic scene of all - the moment when God gives life to his magnificent human creation with a single touch of index fingers. Elsewhere God is working diligently to complete the endeavor of creating a world that his human charges can thrive in. Here he divides light from darkness, and there he separates land from ocean. Tosses the sun, moon, and distant planets into the void in one scenario, and becomes a divine horticulturist by conjuring flora and fauna out of thin air in another. Yet not each and every detail is rosy upon the Sistine Chapel ceiling. Not too long do Adam and Eve find themselves in challenges, incapable to resist the forbidden fruit that an evil serpent offers, and all that follows falls to hell in the next scenes as the sorrowful couple is banished from Eden. Things only become worse as humanity descends deeper into depravity, culminating in the horrific Flood sequence where much of the world is submerged beneath the swelling waves of God's wrath. When Michelangelo's astounding fresco cycle was eventually shown in just four years of almost superhuman activity to a feverish public in 1512, the world was suitably amazed. He was hailed as the greatest artist of his, or any other generation, and the history of art was to be altered forever. 
About The Triumph of the Name of Jesus, which you suggested more. In the wake of the call to arms of the Counter-Reformation for a renewed emphasis on the ability of art to astound the faithful with astounding feats of painterly virtuosity, Roman artists went above and beyond in their pursuit of pushing the boundaries of their craft in the numerous magnificent new churches that were appearing all over the city. Among the most luxurious of them all was the Gesù, the mother church of the newly founded Jesuit order. The magnificent church's interior, finished in 1584, is a treasure trove of priceless artwork, but what truly excels visitors is the spectacular paintings that were painted on the dome and ceiling a century later. Il Baccicio, the artist, seemed to have created a miracle that is solely appropriate for the hallowed surroundings. As you cast your gaze upwards, the church's vault appears to vanish into a whirling mass of clouds, providing a clear glimpse into the celestial sphere of heaven. The Triumph of the Name of Jesus was the one dear subject matter to the Jesuits' hearts. Immersed in dazzling rays of celestial light, the monogram of Christ's name looms at the very core of the ceiling, encircled by a plethora of angels and holy beings enthralled with the miracle. By the mere mention of Christ's name, rebel angels tempted by Satan's hollow promises of power were defeated and tumbled illusionistically from the vault in a tangle of grotesque limbs and painful poses. Baroque bombast at its best together with the free combination of painting, sculpture, and architecture fosters a theatrical, multi-sensorial, and three-dimensional ensemble - Baccicio's enormous fresco guaranteed The Gesù's place as one of the most significant pilgrimage sites in Rome during the 17th century.  
The fact that Keegan shared and conversed the knowledge which every Visual Arts learner has plainly knew like the back of their hands with you was certainly impressive. Disparities with shapes, colors, and patterns; the balance between the frames and, more especially, Keegan's art-related approach is incredibly unrestricted and free. Much too refined an aesthetic sense for an architect of his caliber.
You two were so wrapped up in your work that the other friends had to remind you that it's almost time for the study hall to close, not realizing the two hours went by rather quickly. Silently, you sighed as you packed up your stuff, aware that you might not get to see Keegan again. It's extremely difficult to come across someone who suits you like that, after all. Despite your pout of discontent, you said everyone farewell and began to leave.
"Wait!" The boy called after you in a hurry, so you stopped and gestured to your best friend to wait for you in the parking lot.
Even though you're shorter than Keegan, this posture of him was as if he just got scolded by you as the boy scratched his head and stared down to the floor. Humming speechlessly because he couldn't find the right word , you were patient to wait for him to continue.
"Every day after school.....are you free?" He raised his voice timidly.
"It depends, what's wrong?" You inquired again, carefully, so as not to press the issue.
"Just, if it's okay, can you teach me how to paint.....I mean, doodling is fine" He quickly added, "Please....don't say no"
With a grin, you lifted that attractive face to face you by your index finger under his chin, "I can teach you everything about visual arts, as long as you don't criticize my limited abilities sweet boy"
Keegan flushed as he heard your teasing and the pet name you gave him, but managed to nod with his lips pursed.
For several months, Keegan consistently showed up on time. He waited for you to finish your lectures before the two of you headed to any random tools room in order to practice. You taught him almost everything: molding ceramics, sketching then painting on canvas frames, or how to create tertiary hues......
Exams requiring greater expertise, such those for oil painting or sculpturing, could come around sometimes. If you allowed Keegan to assist you, you'd stand right next to him, holding his hand, and pressing his larger fingers onto those details that needed extra attention. Of course, you were deliberately interacting closely with the boy but there was no denying the sparks between you both as well.
You're different from the people Keegan knew. You refuse to care about things that didn't concern you, so when you first met you seemed quite formal; you also possessed quite dark humor, which definitely interfered with your artistic fancy. 
Actually, you admired Italian painter Roberto Ferri even more. Roberto's works reflected what you're seeking in various pieces of art - the shading and coloration, the nudity and amalgamating were not jarring or confusing, but rather extremely precise and incisive. You elaborated once that 'Contrariety is necessary', nevertheless, as with other fields. It was previously remarked by your professor that your taste in artistry is sort of….dark and vulgar, they suggested that an extremely distinct portrayal would be beneficial for stimulating the artist's brain system. So you decided to go with Vincent Van Gogh. You valued him because he was influenced by painters like Monet and Renoir, who embraced New Impressionism, and shared a fascination in light with them. But he quickly established his own unique: powerful brush technique, mainly using warm reds, oranges, and yellows. Subtle brush strokes resulted in powerful and striking visualizations.
“And basically because a tiny frame as my phone case couldn’t fully convey Ferri's painting and the content was also more sensitive” Similar to Van Gogh's art was definitely the more suitable option.
That's how you explained when the younger one started to ask way too many questions rather than focusing on his work. 
Keegan found it fascinating that you're quite flirty and enjoy calling others by pet names as he got to know you better. The boy flushed upon hearing you calling your best friend by tons of intimate names that you gave her. You also compliment a lot, but what's bothered Keegan was the way, the tone in which you delivered them. 
Your voice is a bit lower, sounding like you're purring. Good job, That's it, Perfect for his efforts and Pretty boy, Sweetheart, Love for the times when you two talked outside the box.
Keegan always felt as though there was a dulcet shiver traveling down his spine after earning praises from you; itching but intriguing somehow. And in return, he called you Tutor, his tutor, to both tease and offer his appreciation for the guidance which you're happily imparted without assuming any explanations from him. For instance, why did he choose Architecture and not Visual Arts?
You respect his privacy, he knew. You still tended to him, but not in an uncomfortable way, making him willing to be lured to your side more and more. 
Everything was going so well until a few weeks ago. Keegan abruptly grew more and more aloof. Frequently, he would either cancel in the last-minute or the night before, leaving you disappointed and not understanding why. You assumed there was something special between you and him. Yet, after he returned, you were overjoyed at first but eventually grew uneasy around him as he became angrier, more easily agitated, and no longer wanted to be close to you.
He wanted to try whittling this time. Unlike stone or clay, which could be readily crafted, the main substance used was wood. 
Wood and other hard materials are usually tough to mold, and Keegan was plainly not capable of handling them given his greeness. But whenever he gave up and you just sighed then redone the whole log, it still simply caused disappointment if it didn't turn out the way he wanted. You knew that Keegan was under a lot of pressure due to the art program's periodic exams so you've attempted to steer him toward a more agreeable subject, but his stubbornness proved to be a bothersome obstacle. 
So you merely stood in the corner of the room and gazed at that enormous back for that reason. Your head slightly tilted to take a better view of a coating of sweat adhered to his forehead and his eyebrows furrowed as his lips pursed when the boy was unable to come up with ideas. The soft gestures in stark contrast to his veiny arms always made you wet your lips in silence.
They said ‘Men are most charismatic when they're focused’. And you couldn’t agree more.
If he caught you, like before, he would purposefully poke fun at you and garner an eye roll from you before your enraged fingers pinched a part of his sculptures. Superb reprisal.
But shit was different that day....
"Fuck me, why is it so difficult?" Keegan complained with his raspy voice, throat as parched as the Sahara desert from dehydration for quite a while.
"I'll go fetch something to drink” 
“No need….here” You quickly stopped him, reached into your bag and pulled out your water bottle, and tossed it to him, “Don’t want you to get kicked out of here” 
According to the rules at your university, you risk being expelled if, after office hours, you enter the wrong building as a non-student belonging to that specific department.
“Alright, whatever you say” He spoke as holding up his hands in a surrendering gesture.
Which made you scrunch your face due to his disrespectful manner.
"Are you upset about me raising my voice?" Catching your grimace, Keegan mockingly raised his question.
He was always playful, but at the time, he's being snarky toward you. And you detest that so much.
"Concentrate on your work" Maintaining the monotone tone but lowering your voice a bit in order to show authority, you slowly moved closer to his standing. 
"Don't touch" The boy glared.
You folded both hands behind you, focusing entirely on the piece of wood rather than Keegan. He also resumed his motion, occasionally crouching down to search for sketches that had been discarded somewhere or different carving knives. 
Interruptedly, you and Keegan would talk about approaches to improving the origin log, but the discussion quickly devolved into another argument, so he snubbed you and turned away to continue. For fuck sake, these teenage lads' egos are so goddamn tremendous. You're solely offering advice, not imposing; why would he behave like that? 
Just take a look around....The floor beneath his feet, where tools were being flung and numerous strewn bits of pared timber scattered all over. Your mother used to frequently nag you when you were a kid because of your untidy traits, plus, that terrible habit would get you into trouble eventually. 
And as predicted, when the boy turned to retrieve his palette, he neglected to take out the blade, leaving it lodged in the wood. So undoubtedly, you have to remove it to avoid any potential dangers.
"I told you not to touch it!" 
Turning back and seeing you touching the most difficult mosaic area that he had just completed, Keegan barked and quickly paced to violently nudge your hand away.
There was a faint sound of something sharp cutting through the spongy softness, and the knife had left a sweet, delicate line which broadened from your palm all the way to your chelidon. Because the blade is designed to precisely carve into small spaces so your veins did not splash out any gallon of your sweet crimson; instead, one drop, then two drops, and at last, like sap oozing out from a tree trunk - your arm have unleashed waves of red fluid, dripping onto the chilly surface below. 
With a hiss, you quickly reached for your thin blouse and tightly wrapped it around your arm to halt the bleeding. It wasn't painful, but the stinging and burning that were given seemed as if your skin was being roasted over an intense flame, forcing you to shut your eyes to block out the suffering.
"F-fuck...oh fuck..." Keegan's voice trembled, "I told you not to come closer"
You slowly turned around, tightly sealed lids opened and penetrated straight into his sapphire pupils. Menacing expression made him gulp.
"Don't blame others for your carelessness, Russ" You gritted your teeth, "If it weren't for me, you would have to ask the professor’s permission for submitting your assignment late, so be grateful and quit that attitude of yours, eh?"
Every word, laced with venom as you amplified them. It's true that he's also working on his test, so the boy was too stunned to speak, dumbfounded and did not dare to chase after you as you stormed out of the room. 
_-_-_-_-_-_-_
It's the beginning of autumn, the sky was pouring, and dry leaves that are tinted with ocher and lemon were falling everywhere throughout the campus, adding to your already melancholy mood.
Two weeks of nonattendance on account of an implausible excuse, such a car accident, as it's a violation to the law to arbitrarily use the college facilities and supplies other than during regular instructional sessions.
The lobby, which was crammed to excess and devoid of standing space, had become vacant by now. After all, your class was the last one of the day, thus it's unsurprising that the place was quiet without a soul in sight. You stayed back late to wait and chat with the professor about some unfinished school work since you dislike having to jostle, surely not to avoid meeting somebody.
Dark green moss off-shoulder knitted sweater with stretchy jeans and a pair of Dr.Martens leather boots. As you drainedly opened the locker to store your things, the voice that had become ingrained in your memory appeared somewhere behind you. 
“I texted you about the injury, but you didn’t reply”
Fucking bad timing, you cussed under your breath.
“My mother said she’d chop me into pieces if I dare to hold a paintbrush, let alone texting” You answered curtly, wanting to shoo Keegan away. 
“Oh….so is yo—”
“My arm ‘s alright by now, you don’t have to worry ‘bout it…” You shutted him off, clearly didn’t have enough patience to deal with him, “I have to go, bye Keegan”
Turning swiftly on your heel then immediately getting captured by the younger person by your wrist, you pushed out a deep sigh before frowning and glancing up at the person who was blocking the path in front of you.
“Slow down, hey, I just want to talk—” He retreated his palm right away, “I-I want to apologize for what…uhm...”  
It's been a while since you've witnessed this withdrawn and reserved side of him, but you're so fatigued that you didn't want to talk to or give a damn about anyone. The boy seemed to have realized how you were suppressing your discomfort and has moved back, returning you back your personal space.
“Please, I’m terribly sorry for my precipitation, I didn’t mean to make you bleed”
Keegan didn't want you to ever leave on your own again because of his past foolishness, so he reminded himself to maintain his distance and remain composed. You understanded that Keegan was truly sincere in his intention to make it up to you, and yet you did not ask him to. It's not like you saved him or something, plus, you hate the thought of someone owing you a favor or anything similar.
“It’s just an accident, Keegan” You exhaled, punctuation, end of discussion. 
If possible, you wish to never see him again. You always find a way to avoid confronting your complex emotions since you're not very good at facing them and nothing else can give you a sense of security other than that.
"Then can you, please, one last time...." He spoke in a somewhat softer, more beseeching tone, ".....Be my tutor"
As if being haunted by his previous mockery, you searched for irony in those stunning eyes, and you found none. There's also a determination that rendered it impossible to argue against, so you have no choice but to approve.
Keegan followed you to your regular spot. Because it's the weekend, even the janitors had fled as soon as their shifts ended, leaving the entire campus to you two. You were correct to assume that, all thanks to the two-way, one facing the parking lot and the other towards the campus, which had taken the place of the room's two walls, showing only Keegan's bike there. Since the art building is regarded as your university's maze, students from other departments couldn't find you two so you certainly wouldn't be disturbed.
Unfortunately, there weren't enough necessary items and tools, you decided to paint on the canvas as usual.
Setting down your backpack, you faced the exterior and silently observed the younger one, waiting for his request. Keegan swallowed hard, hating the distance between you two. You fixed your gaze on him as though a slight movement of yours might result in a reprimand.
Fucking fool, he scolded himself.
"I....I want you to model f-for me" He scratched his head.
"A-and I got this piece of white silk....y-you can do whatever you want with it" he said hurriedly, frightened you might turn him down.
Seriously? Do whatever you want with it. What Keegan just said made him truly want to smack the shit out of him so bad. 
You tilted your head in silent thought. Obviously, sketching the body lines proved difficult enough but adding the garments unveiled an extra challenge entirely. That explained for your nod and your gradual removal of the clothing covering your body. Starting with your boots, then your jeans and panties, but for your upper body, you couldn't do it yourself.
"Get the silk then come here, please, I need a hand"
The request wasn't coerced, and you did not send it out like a command. Though you were not a people pleaser, Keegan always both loathed but admired your civility. The boy was aware that you're not the type to readily undress for others to view, yet something about your professional face unnerved him.
Grabbing the silk, Keegan cleared his throat and walked over to you. He waited for you to grant him permission before gingerly catching the edge of your sweater and pulling it over your head. Then the bra, which was simple to unclasp with one hand. The final bit of cloth slipped off your body, revealing you to the boy whose ears and face were as red as a ripped tomato due to your angelic bare physique.
"Are you gonna start?" You inquired and took the silk from the other person's hand.
And Keegan frantically ran to drag a divan for you to sit on.
The white silk piece was extremely lengthy but thin, resembling a stream that covered your entire body. The feather-like friction caused your nipples to tighten a bit, and your palm nonchalantly covered the tender region between your legs, creating an elegant yet equally alluring sight. You were aware that you weren't blessed with an aesthetically pleasing figure, but the tent that could not be appeased at the crotch of the artist across from you was enough to provide you a boost in your performance. 
Whether it's an ordinary biological response or another type of reaction... 
Your muscles were sore from maintaining the same posture for a long time. As you raised your gaze to Keegan, he saw and paused to give you both a moment to rest.
"Tired?" You asked when the boy stretched.
"I'm the one who should ask that, tutor" Keegan snickered. Oh the sound he made never failed to make you smile as well.
Standing up, the boy pushed past his work and knelt down before you to gently massage your calf with his warm hands. Keegan didn't raise his head, rather, he concentrated on aiding you in stretching your muscles. Needless to say, Keegan was deeply ashamed for his reckless behavior as well as the impulsive words that followed. Though it's clearly not between the two of you, there's still a problem, and since you're not a nosy person, you weren't sure how to approach him.
"My parents found out...." He bitterly confessed, "They broke the clay piece I made with you - two halves of the face kissing each other"
At that moment, your breathing stopped and your chest tightened when you learned the reason for the boy's sudden alienation.
"But that's not an excuse" He bit his lip, "I was an asshole, a truly fucking asshole.....You know, art a-and you are the only safe place I ever had. But I’ve treated you wrong, so wrong" 
Reaching for your wounded arm, he planted kisses along the sunken scar that owned a brighter pigmentation on your flesh. His tender and mindful gestures truly broke your heart.
"I'm sorry...I'm really sorry, I shouldn’t have, I should never treat you that way" His voice sounded ruptured, like it had been violently trodden upon, yet it likewise sounded like a growl.
"Why didn't you tell me?" You gingerly whispered.
Keegan's eyes were glassy and his orbs compared to two polished pearls, constantly wavering in misery. He didn’t know what to say or how to say it.
The divorce that resulted from one of Keegan's parents having an affair was the lowest point in his life. They filed a lawsuit in court, but neither one was willing to give the other child custody, so he ended up living under a rotten roof. All the dreams the boy had have been extinguished, they no longer meant anything. Allowing them to control his life in the way they wanted, forcing him to study like a dog day and night, and only bringing him the meals that were enough to meet his basic nutritional needs. When his passion for painting was once again re-awakened, Keegan did all in his ability to persuade his parents for the first time to let him decide his future, but they disdained art so much that they made him study architecture instead. Once again, Keegan's purposeless life has returned. He took a gap of four years to join the military, but his parents refused to leave him in solitude. They threatened to use greater punishments if he resisted again, stating that they forbade him from dying on the battlefield. 
How ironic, can you be forbidden to die? Ever?
Thankfully, after entering in this university, Keegan no longer had to live with his parents, letting him have more freedom for himself. Up until Keegan met you, it appeared that his typical university years were not proceeding along in the same way anymore. 
The boy fought to not shed a tear in front of you as his lips quivered whilst he recalled those painful memories. Knowing that no matter what, you wouldn't defame him, but vulnerability has never been on Keegan's mind.
“Hush, my sweet boy” Bending down and connecting yours with the boy's forehead, you cooed.
It was some time before the younger one calmed down. As Keegan's breathing steadied, you gradually withdrew to look him in his eyes, your hands caressing his cheeks and your thumbs lightly rubbing them in comfort. It made you smile warmly to hear him purring in his throat like a cat being cuddled by its master.
“Feel better now?” 
“Mhmm” He shook his head.
“Oh poor baby, what can I do to cheer you up then?” You giggled.
Out of the blue, Keegan took hold of your foot and placed it on his crotch, gently applying pressure and moving it back and forth to arouse the sensitive area beneath the fabric. And you were so taken aback that you couldn't take your eyes off where the boy was using your foot to pursue his pleasure. You've never imagined Keegan would be so straightforward.
"Ah...I-I'm...oh g-god..." He lowered his head and nibbled the skin on your thigh, "Can you -ah- feel my cock twitching f-for you, ma’am?"
Ma’am? 
“Can I call you ma’am….?” He’s breathing heavily, “In the end….ha a-ah…you’re still gonna be my tutor anyways, right?”
You blinked and then suddenly burst out laughing, and Keegan foolishly laughed along with you. Whipped your head down and moved your digits closer to his lips, you eagerly allowed Keegan to play with your foot as he moistened your fingers with his tongue. His soft tongue gilded back and forth between your pointer and middle fingers, and each time you bit your lip, his cheeks would sink in to suck them. It's amazing how different Keegan looked from what you imagined.
“How ‘bout mommy?” Poking your tongue to your inner cheek, you asked while still dancing your fingers with his tongue.
Of course, without hesitation, he nodded aggressively and continued to suck harder on your digits. But then you withdrew your hand and leg, making the boy whined in frustration and rubbed his head in your lap.
"N-no...no please don't do that...." He pouted, "I was so close...."
"Shhh...be a good boy and you'll get what you want" You murmured softly, and Keegan's body shivered as your lips touched his sensitive ear.
You raised an eyebrow and gave Keegan a satisfied smile in response to his yearning gaze. Instantly the boy drew closer, his lips meeting yours. Tongues intertwined, teeth scraping and lower lips bitten and swollen, you lowered your head to deepen the lustful, making Keegan groaned in pleasure.
"Moan for me, Keeg" You broke away from the kiss, moved down and bit his neck, "I wanna hear you, loud and clear"
And he obediently tagged along, his lips trembling as he continually let out muffled whines and mellow groans. The boy's body swayed in response to the sensation of your lips against his flesh.
"C-can I make you feel good, too, mommy?" He wetted his lips, hands reaching up to gently knead the soft plumpness on your chest with an unabashed greed.
"Hmm? You wanna suck my tits?" Your voice trailed off, teasing him
"Yes, yes, please" 
As soon as you nodded, the boy reached to the thin layer of silk and started squeezing your breasts which were set underneath. His large palms dutifully kneaded your feminine parts, mouth bit and sucked, leaving countless love marks from your jawline to your cleavage. You're just so soft, he couldn't get enough of it, of these beautiful breasts waiting to be fed to him. As his movements took over his mind, Keegan threw away the unhandy cloth, lunged forward to nibble the sides of your chest; his tongue circled each, constantly retreating to bounce them in his hands, making satisfying noises while latching on them again and again, non-stop.
“C’mon, don’t be shy” You cocked your head down to your chest, beckoning the younger person who was drooling over your delicious rosy nipples.
Keegan was indeed a good boy when you didn't have to repeat, shoving his face right into one of your bosoms without wasting anymore time. The first sensation you felt was his lips; he kissed them, then kept pinching and rotating them around with his teeth, prompting you to growl at the sting he brought. His fingers massaged the other one, taking good care of both sides equally, just like that - the boy was too devoured into you. However, that was still not enough. With a 'pop' as Keegan released you, he lifted your breasts and pulled them in, pointing your nipples towards the middle of your chest. Warm, pink tongue deftly rolled up and down, in between, wrapping around your buds. He twirled it, circled it around your hard nipples; lusty saliva was way too audible, irresistible ecstasy clenched your legs together and you kept pushing your chest harder to his face. 
“F-fuck…you’re doing so good -ha- so good” And he glazed his teeth tighter, “Yes! Fuckin— just like that pretty boy”
Your fingers reaching the boy's scalp, your nails clasped and lightly scratched his cleanly shaven nape, evoking more sinful groans from Keegan. His orbs, dilated with need, blown wide to meet yours, and his lashes fluttered somewhat, as though he wanted you to keep praising him. 
The thought of Keegan focusing on you as if you're a goddess, a faith, to be treasured and worshiped only by him, gave you chills.
Tilting your head back, your own feverish thoughts had heightened your arousal yet left the younger person unfulfilled.
“Tch…no” Keegan let go of your breasts, cupping your cheeks with both of his hands and pulling your face back into its place, “No, no….why’re you turning away, mommy? Keep those eyes on me, let me see…let me see them piercing a hole into my soul”
Trailing his strong, muscular arms down your lower body, Keegan grabbed you by the waist and pulled you closer to him. The suddenness of your knees buckled by your shoulders, exposing the glistening pussy dragged a quite loud yelp out of your lips. As your back sank down the divan cushions, your midsection had been folded in and the stomach rolls which always gave you insecurity made you hesitant to keep extending your legs. So you attempt to sit up, how on earth did Keegan allow that?
“I know what you’re thinking mommy, and I don’t give a fuck ‘bout that” The boy spoke, maintaining his intense eyes on you.
“I want you to own me, treat me like your fucking slave, use me as much as you fucking want, yeah?” He spitted on your cunt, making you moaned out like a bitch in heat. “I’m your little slut” he grunted, “I’m your little toy….I am, I am, fucking just for you” he whispered, teeth gritted as he punctuated on each word.
The boy kissed your ankle, bent down and nibbled on the back of your thighs and the sides of your buttocks. His large palms greedily caressed your asscheeks, not forgetting to add a few spanks.
“Use me, give me fucking confidence….give me a will to live, mommy” He plead, “Give me that fucking pussy”
All your embarrassment has vanished into thin air, leaving only devastating elation. And Keegan, who had been waiting for that, launched himself at your glistering cunt and immediately became addicted to the taste of your arousal. He lavishly covered your entire pussy with open-mouth kisses, his lips pressed firmly and gulping nonstop, smearing your juices all over his visage and down to your asshole, getting some fucking prohibited moans out of you.
The younger then stopped, long enough to take in your beautiful two holes close up as he examined the sweet long slit.
“Lemme sniff on it”  He inhaled the sweet, musky scent of your cunt, “Let your boy breathe on it, mommy, lemme look at it twitching for me”
Your body responded instinctively, pussy quivering beneath his heated breaths. Before you realized it, he had already let go of your legs to fully spread out your folds and was burying his face against your bare cunt once more. His nose nudged above your entrance and his tongue began to work in seconds, sinking and churning the inside of you. 
“Oh fu— YES, more Keeg….more” Your body trembled violently as your desire for additional pleasure grew, reaching out to clutch on him.
Keegan’s four fingers pressed firmly on your lower abdomen as he began to lick up and down your slit while using his thumb which was only inches above your pearl to pull the folds around away. And when your hood moved away, the boy finally had your blood-swollen clit sitting there in front of his lust blown pupils. It’s puffy, aching and throbbing. It’s calling for him, he assured that. Receiving your loud moans as an encouragement, Keegan softly hummed directly on your rock hard clit as he continued to stimulate your hole by landing his tongue against it. His digits buried deeply inside your pussy and he increased the pace, pumping in and out, rotating them, and curling them so as they scratched your walls vigorously.  
Without backing down, the younger one flicked his tongue, rubbing it up and down unforgivingly on your pearl. You jointed and fought to squirm out of Keegan's hold, only to be held back by him as his teeth bit down. You were too fucked out when his lips swallowed on your clit, thighs began to squeeze either side of his head due to the fantastic feeling.
“Mhm hmm, that’s it….” The boy continued to work his tongue and fingers on you as quickly as possible, “That’s my mommy, c’mon, keep squeezing me with those thighs….yeah, stare at me -uhm- stare at your pretty boy as he eat your pussy out”
Those fucking praises and the way he avaricious desire to attain your climax at all costs as a reward has successfully pushed you to the edge. The familiar hot cramping in your womb beneath your lower belly was fleeting for just a moment and then your scream of satisfaction came out, your hands clamped down on Keegan's head above your cunt to jerk your hips on his naughty mouth, riding out your high.
“Fuck…f-fuck” Your chest heaved rapidly, “You’re a fucking beast”
“And you did not let me go, tho I’m not intending to pull away either” The boy peered up with the shit-eating grin on his face before lowering down to smooch around your cunt one last time.
You giggled as Keegan scattered a trail of kisses all over your physique. Your lips, your navel, and your collarbone. You additionally show your gratitude by tucking your arms around his solid shoulder blades, lifting him above you to prolong the passionate kiss.
Exquisite - the divine taste of your release from his mouth, delicate - the way your lips clung firmly, and submerged - the way your tongues entwine without separating.
The moment was short lived since your waist was scraped by something stiff. You winced a little as you recoiled from the kiss, peered down, and were enchanted to catch a glimpse of Keegan's manhood - it was just... gorgeous. Only when you two pressed right against each other did the freshly shaven pubic hair of his gave you a nice itchy sensation. Your pelvises were adhered together so you could gauge the length, and the tip of his cock, which was already partially hard, was leaking precum onto your stomach. 
“Satisfied?” Keegan lifted his brows and inquired when he noticed you gulping and staring at his lower torso.
You beamed up at the younger one, stretching down to grab his ass, “I promise to make a sculpture of it”
The boy's low and seductive laugh was suppressed when he forced retained his breath while your grip moved lightly to position him directly in front of your awaiting cunt, not before brushing his head to gather the most of your slick. As a gesture to allow him to climb up to kneel on the divan, your other elbow pushed down to slightly elevate the center of your body up a bit. 
“Ready?” 
Keegan only gave you a brief kiss on your temple and leaned your foreheads together without saying anything. The two of you seemed to share the same breath, holding together when he plunged into you and exhaling together as he truly bottomed out. Your own eyes blurred with the startling fullness he provided you with.
“You’re so warm mommy, fuck, too warm” The younger hissed through a barely contained growl. 
Swallowing hard, you shifted your airflow and wiggled your hips in an attempt to adjust with the new intrusion. Fortunately, you're not an imposing person. Little by little, your pussy gradually loosened and accepted him, and his head flew back as his unwavering control slipped inch by inch, not so different from the way his shaft was slowly entering you.
“Move, love, need to feel you deep inside me” 
Sheathing Keegan deeper into you, you purposefully pressed your hips against his, whispering into his ear. For a few while, the younger one remained idling, realizing that you were showing him the sweet spots inside you. So whenever you heard him mewling like a horny dog, biting upon your lower lip gently as he felt your walls fluttered around him. You knew he was memorizing for his own pleasure, as well as that of you.
Failing to bear it any longer, Keegan sat up and tenderly pulled out his manhood. At first, you assumed him to be gentle, but you were incredibly naive. He struck with such ruthlessness that your breath left your lungs in a passionate symphony of his name and contented moans. Angling your legs on one side of his shoulder, Keegan caged your thighs with both of his arms and pinned them there. His pace was too rough, and the tension that followed made it simpler to sense the boy's steadfast heartbeat as your skin rested smoothly on his broad chest. 
“Keeg– Keegan, shit…” 
Keegan knelt in front of you - hair slightly damp from perspiration that partially stuck to his forehead and partially dangled with the tempo of his body's movements, those massive biceps, muscular legs, and taut waist all flexed as he hammered into your core. The room's dim lighting and your glassy eyes granted the younger person the appearance of a finely sculpted statue, an unreal portrait.
Fuck, “You look so beautiful, oh my beautiful boy”
I knew it might be an exaggeration but here, is your Björn Johan Andrésen. Exclusively yours.
“Ha–ah….yours, I’m all yours” With an ominous grin, Keegan drew forward to murmur, "And you're also mine, right?"
However, you were so engrossed in the pleasure that you failed to respond. That explained why the person above suddenly pulled back, leaving you there clenching around nothing. When you started to prop yourself up, he swiftly folded you in half, locking you in that position.
“Put your co—”
“Nah….you’re gonna say it” With one hand, Keegan pressed your knees to your chest while the other was lazily stroking his cock. Glazing the tip so damn nigh to your bloated entrance.
“For fuck sake, of course I’m yours” You huffed out, “As if any fucking cock could ever allowed to be inside me”
Surely the younger one's erection had returned because a lustful stupor hit you as his pelvis immediately slammed into your plump ass. Up to the hilt. He had reached your cervix with the tip of his cock, ache yet madly numb.
“You’re my mommy, my mistress, my fucking big tough mistress aren’t ya?” He eagerly pounding into you, in a more primal way, “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckkk…..you’re so damn hot when you’re mad, y’know that?”
“Yeah?” You smirked.
“Fucking yeah”
The harder Keegan pounded into you, the louder the moans of you both came to a crescendo, almost at the peak. Since you knew you wouldn't be able to hold off for much longer, you had to encircle him more tightly with your legs, flutter your walls, and swallow his cock more deeply to ensure that his body would soon follow you.
“You're gonna cum mommy? Yeah, yeah, cum for me mommy, cum, cum, cum” Keegan shifted down and rubbed your swollen clit with great effort, making you cry as his finger plucked nonstop on it.
The younger person's chants ended with a growl from both you and him. He replaced his shaft with his thick digits, slipping out barely in time since you didn't have a condom. You both focused on the earth-shattering orgasm, on how his cock twitched in his palm and on his ropes of hot seed shooting onto your abdomen, dripping down to your wide-opened cunt, unable to stop.
Swore that you two had never felt so euphoric.
You laid limp under his sight, eyes flooded in darkness as you looked to the drop of sweat slowly leaving his chin then down to your navel, mixed together with his cum. 
Keegan collapsed on top of you, head buried into your neck. His weight was comforting, and as your fingers trailed to your lower body, you collected the white thick texture there and brought it to your lips, sticking out your tongue to taste then smiled with a satisfied hum. 
"I want to draw you like this" The boy stared upward at you, smiling brightly.
“Should take a photo too, in case you mess up and let me down for posing for you” Keegan tickled you when you kissed him on the lips in response to your cruel mocking.
Having said that, you still truly want to see his painting - of you, what it'll turn out once completed. 
Taglist: @shadowlali , @ghostlythots , @fl3xgio (is it alright if i add you?? 😫😫) , @brickwall035 (saw u a lot on my posts, wondering if i can add u?? 👉🏻👈🏻)
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bi-hop · 1 year
Text
across the spiderverse spoilers under cut
was discussing the film with some of my friends who saw it last night, same as me, and I think I can provide a perspective on one of the major themes that is heavily rooted in the Black Caribbean student experience
tw: institutional racism, references to sexual harassment and antiblack hate crimes
everything in across the spiderverse is incredibly intentional, including the early college advising meeting. now, you may think it's solely furthering the theme of expectations, and while it is concerned with that in a fundamental manner, that's not the full story.
colleges, especially top colleges, want stories about struggle. they live for it! crave it! I was naive enough starting out that summer between my junior and senior years that I thought writing a personal essay about how my interest in game writing has influenced my own trajectory would fly. it didn't. my family, my advisers, they all said it lacked something, that it wasn't me. can you guess what WAS me enough to get me into 13 colleges, including the university of chicago? writing about me being hate crimed and sexually harassed at the same time. because I 'overcame it'. I struggled, yes, but I persevered!
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I don't like college applications. I get the point of the holistic approach, but said approach fails students when what is personal is only seen as worthy if you suffered and can adequately describe it on the page. they constantly say 'we'd rather see a student who did poorly but had to raise their siblings than a Straight As students with no experiences to speak of' but why is the only merit we can find in students, especially students of color, moments of anguish that you have to then fight against? why do I have to recount the worst moments of my life (sanism in Afro-Caribbean communities, sexual harassment, the works) for the sake of a school that doesn't actually give two shits about me now that I'm here? thanks by the way, uchicago, love being a token, it's really cool. I swear this is still about Miles.
the framing of his familial story into something palatable yet appealing to princeton (a school that I also applied to back then) even though it's not exactly true? pure autofiction. and it's what colleges eat up. they want to see a Black boy, son of immigrants (again regardless of how true this might be), suffer but persevere. he's 'beat the odds'! look at him, going from his miserable little Brooklyn existence to studying quantum physics at an Ivy League!
and by the middle of the film, Miles says 'no' to all that. people are constantly trying to write his own story. they want to take who he is and judge it against a board of critics, against algorithms that say his choices are wrong, against his peers who don't think he belongs. and he says "nah. I'mma do my own thing."
he might not be able to transcend the desires of admissions, but he can assert himself here. he can protect his inner child as his mother wanted. and he does it as well as he can. it's why I relate to him so much, I wish I was in the position to do what he does: look someone dead in the eye and reject their narrative of him as unfair and stifling.
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viscountoflondon · 8 months
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College Kavinsky 1.0
This story is based on 3 years post college admissions (So he’s a junior now). Peter and Lara Jean are not together; they broke up amicably (I am Covinksy stan but let a girl have a maladaptive daydream).
Reader is an afro latina curvy girl (Midsize or plus size the choice is yours) however as we have read multiple fan fiction and fictional books we all imagine ourselves as main character so feel free to do so 🥰
I’m sensitive about my shit but i hope you like it 
Warnings: curse words, slight vulgarity.
GIF credits below
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“Where’s Y/N, where’d she go?” Peter asked, looking around for you he was hoping for an opportunity to talk to you, seeing your last interaction was a bit awkward. 
“Oh she left?” Ivy  (your roommate) 
“Why?” he asks taking a sip of his beer 
“Oh that's because Cameron (Ivy’s boyfriend) said it was invite only” Ivy answers 
Tonight the Fraternity was throwing a party, post new chapter  president, vice president, treasurer, secretary, and social chair as the previous seniors had graduated. 
Peter had been mentioned as the new Treasurer a promotion from social chair and Cameron his best friend was given the position as Secretary as the board recognized Cameron’s efforts in assisting his pledge brother and best friend in chapter activities. 
“CAM WHAT THE HELL?!” He asked giving Cameron an incredulous look 
“Sorry shit I didn’t even think about it.” he shrugged in response You had helped Ivy and the other girlfriends set up for the party post the event, and typically this party was the only by invite only party due to the fact that the new leaderships would be discussing exciting plans for the new year and only long term girlfriends and family would be invited back to the Frat house. But honestly the new chapter leadership always got to invite who they wanted. Anyway 2 hours had passed and there was no way you were making your way back to the house. 
Honestly you had no idea what she was talking about during your last interaction all Peter said was he liked your shoes and boy did Ivy scold you. Ivy knew Peter liked you; she didn’t want to tell you because it was like a secret between her, Cam, and Peter, however you were convinced she was a sucker for love looking at your recent interaction with rose colored glasses. 
~Flashback~
“Why didn’t you say something back?” 
“I did, I said thank you” “You were supposed to say oh thanks i like your watch your chain i don’t fucking know follow up with something!” you open your mouth to protest but she continues “What do guys like?” 
You shrug “Cars, sports, fishing” you shrug not understanding her question 
“So a guy complimenting your shoes would mean?” 
“He thinks they are cool” you feel the thud of the pillow hit your body “HEY!” 
“You are impossible! I am setting you up with one of the finest men on campus! And you fumble the damn play” 
You roll your eyes and huff looking up to the ceiling “I think you are looking into this too much” 
“I AM NOT!” she stresses
“Ivanna, why would Peter want me?” 
“WHY WOULDN’T HE LOOK AT YOU! YOU’RE HOT IN FACT” she moves closer “MANY GUYS HAVE ASKED ME ABOUT YOU ESPECIALLY WHEN WE GO OUT TOGETHER!” she grabs your shoulders, shaking you a bit hoping to shake some sort of sense in your brain. 
You hold a look of confusion “what?” you respond slightly above a whisper
“YES PEOPLE HAVE ASKED ME ABOUT YOU!” she takes in a deep breath to calm down realizing she was a bit too passionate “Guys have asked me if you have a boyfriend , can I hook them up, but I didn’t because they are fuck boys. Peter is not”
“So Peter asked you to hook us up?” “NO!” she responds quickly hoping she didn’t give away her scheme
Your brow quirks “okay so what makes you believe that he likes me?” “A girl knows things” “Uh-Huh” you smirk and walk away to grab the wine bottle. 
“So next time you see him”You interrupt “If there is a next time”
“Oh there will be trust me” You roll your eyes “you need to work that charm”
You squeal “Ow” you say in response to her pinching your side 
“And you need to work your charm, tu entiendes?” 
“SI! Damn!” 
“GREAT” she smiles
“So can we discuss the party now? How was it?” “Actually it was okay” She shrugs boring kinda because it was like a meeting with beer and food and games involved. 
“Oh” 
“Yea” she says snuggling into your side and focuses on the movie ahead. 
It has been almost 3 years since your last relationship. Things were said to you that made you question yourself, question the value you could add in a relationship etc, so it was hard that, the Peter Kavinsky, one of the most popular frat brothers on campus, liked you.  I mean you’ve seen the previous relationships/situationships/hookup girls they looked nothing like you so much so when Ivy hinted at him liking you made you think she was the most delusional person on this planet called earth. 
She was right, there was a next time, this time it was the homecoming party and as we know each frat house would partner up and try to outdo not only the previous year but make it a party that no one ever stopped talking about. 
“You have to come to the party!” Ivy insists 
“Ivy, it’s gonna be a lot of people” “SO!?” 
“Sooo, .......ugh......... I will come” you finally give in after she begged you for 2 days to go after your initial ‘no’
“YAY! Lets go shopping!” 
“Okay!”
In true homecoming fashion you both had to adorn Stanfords alma mater colors. You both decide on an outfit that suits you best. Your body is buzzing with anxiety as you both get ready. Last minute runs to get nails, eyebrows done, running to the liquor store to get pregame (A/N: drink responsibly), running to grocery store to get last minute late night snacks(Ice cream, chips, fruit, cookies). 
“Ready?!” Ivy asks you taking the last sip of her chaser “As I will ever be!” you respond 
She smiles and links arms together as you both walk out to meet your uber driver (A/N:  don’t drink and drive) 
As you pull up to the house the line extends way beyond what you initially thought. 
“OMG! Ivy” you look at the line feeling very overwhelmed and intimidated how were all these people going to fit in that house? How many kegs did they even buy to be sufficient for all these people? Isn’t there like a fire code or something? When the lines were small the house was packed you can’t even imagine all of them fitting.
“I know how it looks but trust me it’s gonna be fun!” she beams at you “Let me text Cameron” 
In a few minutes he appears from the front “HI BABY!” she jumps in his arms “Look who I convinced to come” they both look at you
“Y/N! Glad you made it” he says giving you a side hug
“Yea, thanks for the invite.” you smile still feeling like this was a bad idea. To be fair you never attended any of the homecoming parties or activities. Too many people, drunk people, pissed people, sad people, happy people, everyone everywhere it just wasn’t your thing, 
“Come on!” he says, ushering you two in you hear some groans and curse words as you two were allowed in. Inside the house you can breathe a little. It wasn't even full yet a few extra bodies were floating around, certainly not what you imagined. You hear the president give an order to move one Keg out to the backyard. Another voice is heard confirming all rooms are locked and secure. 
“Alright last meeting!”  You hear as you feel Ivy pull you back  “We know the mission?” Mark the president comments 
They respond “EPIC PARTY, EPIC FRAT HOUSE! TOP FRATERNITY OF STANFORD!” They cheer “LETS GOOO!!!” you look around and see Peter joining the cheering
“AND PLEASE NO GIRLS IN THE ROOMS I DON’T CARE HOW MUCH YOUR DICKS GET HARD SEND THEM HOME!” Sean the Vice President adds in making them all laugh 
“Here we go '' Ivy whispers to you as they open the door, in a moment the room quickly gets filled up the music is so loud the base in the speakers is vibrating through you. You watch as people grab cups, grab bottles of beer, grab the premade jello shots and make their way to the dance floor as you nurse your liquor punch? That's what they called it anyway. 
After a while your body loosens up you start to care less about the surroundings and you start moving to the music. Ivy had left your side and returned and left again so much so that you didn’t care anymore you were having your own mini party in the very distant corner of the living room which didn’t have any couches? How come you just realized? Actually all the seating was missing. 
You tip your head back to get the last drop in your cup and frown you move from your corner hoping to find no one occupying it and make it to the kitchen 
“SPEAK OF THE DEVIL! Y/N!” 
You turn to look behind you and there stood Peter (of course you notice him first), Ivy, Cam, and a few of the other frat brothers. You wave before getting more of the liquor punch whatever they put in it was really working its way in your system. You walk over and greet them. "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING?" Sean asks
“OH I HAVE I’VE BEEN AROUND!” “THIS IS OUR FIRST TIME SEEING YOU WE’VE SEEN IVY LIKE A BILLION TIMES” You roll your eyes “WE ARE NOT ATTACHED AT THE HIP” and you weren’t you didn’t need Ivy to babysit you, you had fun the introvert way you know observing people and their mannerisms, argument over there, dancing over here, conversation in that corner, oooh trip up the steps
You watch as Peter smirks and that makes you blush, you quickly look away “what are you drinking?” you ask Ivy
“Oh girl i don’t know” she takes a sip “beer?” she takes another “i think i mixed beer with punch” You make a face “ew”
“Gross right?” you nod “Too drunk to care” she throws it back. You laugh in response. When you turn back to the group Peter is gone and your heart drops a little but not enough to care. 
You walk away from the circle and make your way around the crowd. A few guys stop you trying to flirt but it's a wash, they were way too drunk much more than you and were now just saying anything ‘like your tits, let me suck your pussy’ you cringe as you think about it. You spot Peter not too far away dancing. Of course he is surrounded by mostly girls and of course the one who he seems to be chummy with is the girl that fits the aesthetics of his recent situationships. You roll your eyes, fuck Ivy for making you think this guy even liked you. You were better off having a secret crush than hoping he had any interest. The night goes on and your mood is semi sour, not too much more so slight irritation. Thank God for your corner because you need a wall to lean on, heels, no seats, and alcohol are not the best combo. You look down at your clock and see it is 1am time for you to head out, you know Ivy wouldn’t mind hell you haven’t even seen her or texted her in the past 2 hours. You shoot a text saying you were going to The Crispy Bun, a hole in the wall burger bar that not many people knew about. It had a very retro vibe with a modern spin. 
You push yourself off the wall, stand in line for way too long for the restroom and head towards the front. 
“Y/N!” you hear Ivy and God did you roll your eyes 
“YEA!” you fake a smile
“WHERE YOU GOING?” 
You notice Peter and Sean, and what seemed to be Peter’s interest for the night walking up
“OH I UMM WAS GONNA GO TO CRISPY” 
“OOOOH YESSS!”  She pinches your side 
You squeal again “OW WHAT THE FUCK IVANNA!” She squints and looks at you “YOU WERE GONNA GO WITHOUT ME??” 
“I TEXTED YOU!” You feel yourself getting angry 
She pulls out her phone “OH SHIT YOU DID, SORRY FRIEND!” She throws her arms around you
“WHAT’S CRISPY?” Sean asks
“YOU DON’T KNOW? THEY HAVE THE BEST BURGERS LETS GO!” she says rallying up the small group. 
God no,  this can’t be happening. You were happy to just walk and have a nice burger in your drunken state now you had to be there as Peter and this girl would be flirting right in front of you. 
The group leaves, all 6 of you. You do your best to lighten up your mood, joining Ivy in her singing and giggling. Eventually you guys stop and she links arms with you pulling you close
“This is the time to make your move” she whispers in your ear You scoff “Please not this again” “What?” she looks at you and then back at the guys
“Ivy, he brought a girl, what are you even?” 
She interrupts you “Olivia? That’s Sean’s girlfriend!” 
You blush “oh” “You thought that was some girl he liked?”
“It look...” She interrupted again “Well you are wrong”
“What you two whispering about over there?!” Cameron asks 
“NOTHING!” Ivy sings in response. Ivy goes back to singing, and this time you happily join in. Maybe she was right because why would Peter tag along. You finally make it to The Crispy Bun. 
“Hi, how many?” the host asks “Hi Hannah!”  you greet
“Y/N!, Omg i haven’t seen you in like forever” the older lady comments “I know class and all” She puts her hand on her chest  “I get it girl”
“We have 6” “Ooooo I won’t be able to sit you guys for like an hour. But if you want there’s many seats by the bar I think you guys can sit in pairs, but as people leave just ask the bartender to move you closer to each other. Does that work?” 
“Yes it’s perfect!” Ivy responds. “And I’m starrrvviingg” You give her look what the hell does she mean by that's perfect? Was she planning on sitting with you and ignoring Cam
You feel her grab your hand and place it on Peter's hand. If the sky opened up and swallowed you now you wouldn’t even be mad.
“Peter take care of her!” 
“Scouts honor” he responds in a calm manner 
“Okay great here are the menus there’s a pair in the middle and and then on each side of the bar, I think” 
“Dibs on middle!” Sean comments pulling Olivia along with him
Your heart races as Peter pulls you through the busy bar, unbeknownst to you he chose the area that seemed to be a bit more calm. He helps you sit on the stool. You thank him sheepishly as he sits on his.
“No problem, so what’s good to eat here Y/L/N?” Y/L/N you like that nickname “Oh umm there’s a lot actually!” you open up the menu so you can both look at it. Peter stands up and moves his stool closer. You blush but try to hide it behind your big  bouncy hollywood style curls. You were a sucker for big hair so of course you had to put in those large rollers in your hair. “They have like gourmet burgers and then the classics” 
“What do you get?” he asks You go to answer but are interrupted by the waitress “Hey guys what can I get you?” You two don’t say much, keeping the conversation light until the food comes out
“MMMM” He moans, throwing his head back. 
“It’s good right” 
“I can’t believe I didn’t know about this place, shit where have I been?” 
“Under a rock” you respond sarcastically. He chuckles in response 
It’s quiet for a while as you two eat, he then looks down at your shoes and smiles. 
“So why you giving me the cold shoulder Y/L/N” he asks looking at you dead on 
Your jaw drops as you watch him pick up one of your fries and plops it in his mouth 
“I have not!” 
“You were giving me the cold shoulder not too long ago” He adds picking up another fry 
“I was not” you blush
He smirks and takes one last bite of his burger “So what was it then?” 
You blush some more and say “I thought you were just complimenting my shoes and...” you pause to think 
He quirks his brow “And?” 
You respond in a soft tone almost whispering “I just didn’t think you... were... interested” 
He scoffs amused “Well I am!” he confirms as he eats another one of your fries
“Do you want my fries?” you ask “Yes they are soo good!” 
“You can eat my leftover burger full now” you offer pushing the plate towards him “Nice” Perfect reason to have boys around they finish your food 
After he finishes he finally speaks “So now that you know I am interested” You blush “Can we get this show on the road, tired of looking at you from afar” “Sure” you blush
“Come here” he pulls you closer and angles your swivel stool to face him while both his legs cage you in 
“What would you like to know about me Peter?’ you ask 
“Everything” You blush and look “I love your smile” “Man you’re laying it in thick” 
He chuckles, throwing his head back “Nah I just wanna know more, you know?” 
“You gotta ask so I know what to tell you?” “Any love interests?” “No? Maybe” 
“Last boyfriend?” “3 years ago?” “Why’d you break up?” “Long story short he cheated” “Favorite TV Show?” “Bob’s Burgers”
“Nice” 
“Siblings”
“None” “Only child wow” you blush pushing the hair behind your ear 
You two continue and eventually you loosen up and ask him the same if not similar questions 
“What?” you ask, focusing back on his eyes. You had done the Marilyn Monroe Triangle method ( A/N: look at youtube, tiktok, etc), not that you did it intentionally just something you would do from close proximity or from a distance. You liked the details of things you noticed. 
He smirked and pulled you even closer, hands caressing your outer things, your eyes widened a bit as he leaned in. “I said, if I asked you out what would you say?” “Oh!” you giggle “Yes duh” 
“You guys want anything else?” 
“Want dessert?” He asks you “Uh no I’m good” you say not wanting to look like a glutton 
“We are good” 
“Alright together or separate checks” 
“Together!”  he responds quickly reaching in his back pocket for his wallet
“Oh I was gonna..” you say reaching for your bag  
He stops you “Consider this our first unofficial first date and if you pull out your card I swear to god Y/L/N” 
You stop midway “Thanks Peter” you say sheepishly 
“Don’t mention it, so about that first date” “What are you two love birds talking about?” Olivia teases
He smiles at her “private things, what's up?” he asks straightening, up looking across to see that Cam, Ivy, and Sean were making their way towards you two
“Oooh private things” She throws her arm around Peter, and caresses his face and you realize the uncomfortable expression 
“You guys done?” “Yea we gotta go back bro, it's been 2 hours cleaning helping get home all that Frat house shit” 
“Oh shit I forgot” 
“Because you’re busy flirting your balls off!” Sean adds
“Fuck off” Sean “ready?” he asks you 
“Oh yea”  you say standing up
You guys walk in pairs now you two being in the middle 
“So about that official first date” he asks lowly not wanting anyone else to hear 
“Oh yea I would love to” you look up at him 
“Yes! I need your number” He said handing you his phone. He smiles down at you and throws his hands around your shoulders pulling you in. 
You guys reach the Frat house and he looks down at you. You look to your side and notice Olivia looking at you both you can’t read her expression, it was odd though “Text me when you get home safe” “Awww Peter” Olivia comes over and pinches his cheek. He rolls his eyes shrugging her off “what about me do you care if I make it home safe?” 
He gives her a deadpan look “of course i do liv” he responds sarcastically 
You smile and rub his arms “I’ll text you Peter” you say looking up at him he smiles and kisses your cheek.
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