#let’s me know I’m improving

[pinkiepig]

#artist poll #idk #sometimes artist styles can shift depending on their level of improvement #having different art styles to an audience however is like having different identities #some could be pog some could be e h #idk what I’m talking about #I just found out I can do polls now yay #piggy oinks #i personally would rather have an inconsistent style #let’s me know I’m improving #(or un-improving) #yuhh

[orcaking]

My body is a collection of all the parts that came before! 🌱🌱🌱

[Image ID: A drawing of a trans masculine person, nude except for underwear. The figure has top surgery scars, and no head, the bottom of a jaw bone with plants growing from it floating above the neck. There are flowers, mushrooms, and stars surrounding the figure, and a bird flying to the left of the canvas. /. End ID]

#i hope the ID is ok???? i’m always unsure abt if i’m writing them right please let me know if there’s ways i can improve!!! #my art #trans art #transgender #trans masc #ftm #top surgery #illustration #queer art #trans artist #gay artist #procreate #digital art #orcaking #mossymountain

[moonmoonthecrabking]

i wonder what it would be like if the whole choir miraculously came back. how do you cope from processing and accepting your death to living again?

they meet penny lamb on the 15th of september, each of them recognising the name from a hauntingly vivid dream they shared the night before.

but it wasn’t a dream. it couldn’t be. it was all real. they died. and they’re here again. what the fuck.

constance blackwood runs to her parents after school and hugs them. there’s nothing wrong with loving them, with being nice. sure, there’s so much more to her than that - her anger, her laugh, her pain, every part of her that makes her complicated and beautiful and worthwhile. but there’s nothing wrong with being the nicest girl in town. there’s nothing wrong with her. not for loving uranium, not for being a teenager, not for making mistakes.

penny lamb, upon talking to the five other teenagers, instantly recognises their conversation. she had a dream the night before, even though she wasn’t in uranium. even though she wasn’t a member of the choir. her elbows and neck aches every time she moved them, her head and forearms seemed as though they lacked blood. she was decapitated on the cyclone, once, but she never boarded it. they all knew her as jane doe, a forgotten name. now she was gifted this second chance, she would be remembered. by everyone, anyone. even if penny lamb was only remembered by herself, it would still be a victory. make a mark on people’s hearts, that would be her first goal. her second was don’t die by decapitation this time.

ricky potts is the most confused. he conceded, didn’t he? granted, that was when he believed only one would return. but still. his life was valuable, even though society looked down upon him. he’s still going to fantasise about zolar, sure, but he’s also going to be that zolarian prophet back on earth. he doesn’t know how much time he has left - none of the choir do - but he can always make a difference.

mischa bachinski has unlocked a new side of himself. rage and passion are twoo sides of the same coin, feeling so deeply for another that justice and care for them becomes your responsibility. but now, he allows himself to be selfish. be introspective. and not just to talia. he looks into himself, the boy he is, rather than being the man everyone expects him to become. he asks for help, for comfort, as he always tried to provide to the others in his life before the cyclone crash.

noel gruber realises the dull tragedy of his life. but even a dull tragedy has ecstasy within it. feelings of unrequited love. oppressed by the leading beliefs of his town for an unchanging part of his identity. a small town cliche. it took him a tragic death to realise the interest of his tragic life. he stops waiting. he starts writing, and continues living. and while the depravity and drama of post-war france is his ideal, maybe a bit of light to balance it out isn’t always the complete worst.

ocean o’connell rosenberg is an absolute fucking mess. if she keeps acting as she did with her second chance, what’s the lesson? that even when a person develops she reverts to her normal self in her original environment? that change is impossible? if she keeps building a life, working towards something, it could all come crashing down in a day. again. but if she stops caring, begins to act like her parents, well, that just shows that no one can break past their upbringing and genetics and no one should ever try. but then she looks out at the choir. her career, that’s fine, she can care about that, she can put work into it. effort for effort’s sake is not futile if the experience itself is enjoyable or helpful. that world, however, pales in comparison to the five people in front of her. caring for them, uplifting them rather than standing atop them, that’s what she wants to do. that’s what the world needs.

“i love you guys. i want to keep getting to know you.”

#rtc #ride the cyclone #everybody lives au #i went in reverse order bc this time it was important ocean was at the end #hopefully i worded myself correctly it’s like 11 here tho so i’m a little messy #point is #i like this concept but please let me know if you think any part of it is shit i want to keep working on it and improving it #constance blackwood #penny lamb #ricky potts #mischa bachinski #noel gruber #ocean o'connell rosenberg #im not incorporating legoland in here i’m sorry idk enough about researching it nor do i personally care to (at this point) #i like hearing stuff ab it!!! just not doing anything with it #ig if you wanted to you could add smth to penny’s ab wanting to be known for more than her parents crimes #but yeah here’s my brain rot enjoy

[kinokoshoujoart]

wait why is that option getting so many votes??

#Autistic Clarification Request Poll #i meant for it to be read as ‘please draw rock in a disrespectful way👀’ #i’m confused because if you look through my blog the suggestive stuff isn’t as popular. but this option is very popular. #i continued to draw Disrespect Content™︎ because i’m a Stubborn Bastard and i personally find it funny #i will continue to draw it regardless because i’m a Stubborn Bastard #but if there are tags i could use to improve your viewing experience please let me know 🫡 #to filter out stuff ya don’t want to see. i don’t wish to make anyone’s day bad but i will draw what i find funny #i don’t want to end up with everyone going ‘you tricked me into approving you posting wacky stuff on main.’ #(i have no plans to stop posting wacky stuff but. i don’t want people to be tricked into approving of it) #although that would be extremely funny. but not fun for you guys!!! #polls #cora is not great at communicating and makes a poll for the poll.

[scottie-draws-sometimes]

I don’t know how, but recently I started thinking about ye old early dsmp and L’Manburg and all that good stuff so here’s a doodle dump

I know some people really hate dsmp, or think it’s cringe, or whatever else. But it’s honestly what got me through most of the pandemic. Not to mention the mutuals I met on here through it!! So no matter what, it holds a little special place in my heart :]]

#I am really tired today #but the grind never stops (I love making and posting art :3) #maybe I show redraw some old things from 2020 #I think I’ve improved a lot since then #so it would be pretty cool to see!! #anyways hope this isn’t too cringe for you guys #I may be cringe but I am free!!!!!!! motto for life!!!!!!! #dsmp #dsmp fanart #lmanburg #uhhhhh what are the fuckin tags again #c!tommy #<- would they still be like this??? idk I hope so #let me know if I’m wrong #c!tubbo #c!niki #Crab Doodles #also don’t mind how long it took me to actually search up niki to figure out her hair -_- #I’m just a little lazy sometimes but I figured it out in the end!!

[bookwyrminspiration]

fervently hoping my Spanish is good enough I can learn another language being instructed in it ough I’m. real nervous for Tuesday wish me well </3

#edit: language is nahuatl btw! #quil’s ​unholy underworld #what is with tumblr’s refusal to remember that tag #anyway #gonna start a new language soon and. the instructor is in méxico and will be zooming in #and they require a certain level of Spanish in order to take it #because of that #but like. yes I’m theoretically passably fluent #however I have very very little real world practice #so I am. nervous #idk how much Spanish will be needed or how much English this instructor knows #but my GOD i want to take this class so I really hope I know enough #they didn’t have any Spanish test before it or anything #i was just casually told knowing Spanish is good for this #perhaps my Spanish will improve from this too #anyway. language is a sore spot ough </3 #also super annoying I have to physically go to campus…to do an online class -_- #it’s my only class that day too I’m literally going to campus JUST to be online #bro let me zoom from home i don’t wanna make the commute #fjowidodknw #imposter syndrome with language activate! #FHIWKSKSK #it’ll be fine everything’s fine it’s all good

[acesammy]

ugh someday I will draw again

#Like I know I’ve had a fucking bad few weeks #I know it’s understandable that I can’t quite access any will to be creative #or focus to just draw #but it also feels bad #and I want to improve but I can’t improve if I don’t fucking do it #but also I just #idk #I think I should probably draw my brother #but that seems like a task that’s beyond me #and I need to work on my SIL’s tattoo #but that /also/ seems beyond me #I’m just not good enough for it #Idk #I’m also just #not good enough period #lea speaks #random vent #kinda letting shit overwhelm me bc it’s been a long day #don’t worry abt it

[sensayssomestuff]

i don’t know if maybe i’m tripping but does anyone else mask in that they like go along with other people’s jokes because i can tell when people are joking and i tend to adopt a more lighthearted/playful demeanor myself but i don’t always necessarily find what they’re saying funny, it’s more that i can recognize that they’re being playful so i adjust my behavior accordingly

and that might be why i struggle with deadpan humor so much like i understand sarcasm if it’s exaggerated but with deadpan humor i can never tell if the person is being sincere or not, like one time in high school my art teacher said to me “i hate you” as an example of deadpan humor because we were talking about this exact same thing and even though she was always kind to me and we never had any beef but to this day i still feel that lingering doubt in my mind because she said it so straight

and i’ve found that when im unmasking i just don’t find things “funny” like i normally would when i am masking which is what got me thinking about all this stuff because maybe its not that i found it funny, maybe its just that i felt pressure to reciprocate the behavior, maybe what i thought as “funny” was actually just my dopamine receptors popping off because a lot of humor calls upon pattern recognition and my brain loves pattern seeking

idk let me know if y’all have ever experienced this or if I’m just tweaking

#actually autistic #actually autism #actually audhd #autistic adult #audhd #adult audhd #autistic experiences #maybe??? #im so lost but then again what else is new #actually audhd more like im actually going insane #will i ever understand my brain? probably not #anyways let me know if i said anything in here that was problematic i don’t think i did but i’m in a state of constant learning #which is the goal but i want to actually improve as im learning and not repeat the same mistakes over and over again

[cptnwynnie]

The letter in his hand might not make much sense if you don't have the context of the paragraphs my friends and I send back and forth to each other, but I saw an excuse to draw these two hugging and I took it

ID: [a drawing of Mr. Benedict and Number Two from The Mysterious Benedict Society. They are hugging. Number Two is turned away from the camera, only her back and hair is visible. Mr. Benedict is facing the camera. Most of him is covered by Number Two, aside from his arms wrapped around her and his head resting on her shoulder, revealing a part of his face. He has a letter in one hand.]

Uncoloured vers. under the cut

#tmbs #mbs #mr benedict #nicholas benedict #number two #number two mbs #the mysterious benedict society #my art #fanart #I’m gonna start putting IDs on my art #but I’ve never written IDs before #so let me know if there’s any way I can improve them

[parttimesiffrinfulltimeproblem]

FINALLY putting my oc art out here! i’m so proud of this piece, and please ask me about matthew (he’s stuck in a timeloop with his bf)

ID: a watercolour and ink painting of matthew, a midsize white trans man with long white hair and a flower tattoos. he is sitting on a wooden chest of drawers on top of a blanket, sleeping and clutching the fabric. he is wearing a partially unbuttoned white shirt, a red tie, red shorts, fishnet tights and a black ring. he has a peaceful expression and is blushing. several items are on the floor and chest of drawers: two books, a pair of glasses, a note, and two cushions. the wall is pale green with a window with green curtains and the carpet is pale yellow. there is a shelf on the wall by his head with a cat shaped clock and book on it, and on the wall on the right of his head there is a framed photo. [end ID]

#oc art #my art #described #lyf laugh love #let me know if i can improve the id!! #the t's in t4t stand for trapped in a timeloop #i’m gonna use that as my oc tag from now on #ask me about matthew and camila… #my silly little guys #adored

[petrichorium]

The fav I have the most frequent (and most intense) fights with is actually jing yuan btw

#pattering on the roof #he has a tendency to make me feel stupid and it’s not entirely by accident #he just can’t help himself #like JDNJFNEF I reference it in my meet fruit fic (which was Very selfship coded) but #the first massive fight we have is before we start dating when he’s still like courting me ig #and wheedles me into playing starchess w him #but I’m BAD at starchess okay I hate it I suck at it sucking at it makes me hate it more #and I like him so much and he’s so good and I wanna make a good impression but I SUCK and I leave every time upset #and he knows ofc he does. I’m improving and he loves seeing me improve which is why he keeps asking #eventually he’s like well maybe it’ll help if I let her win #no. it doesn’t. I blow up at him entirely bc I HATEEEE being condescended to and if u wanted someone who could beat u in starchess then go #find someone else u fucking asshole don’t humiliate me like that (<- face puffy weeping literally the only two people in the garden) #and I storm off sobbing. literally refuse to interact w him for MONTHS he’s making every excuse to bump into me and it’s full cold shoulder #I also never fully forgive him for it. we never play starchess again even centuries down the line after we’re married and he’s retired #n e way yeah #p much every fight is similar he just makes me feel dumb sometimes and I lash out at him #and frankly often it’s warranted bc not infrequently he provokes me on purpose #ss.🌧 yujing

[gregolry]

*googles “how to channel my suffering into art so it doesn’t fester and rot me from within”*

#it seems this is a common question #we all possess the capacity for great pain and incredible expression #I wrote a soup or side note this morning #but idk. probably no point in doing that #I just need to find an outlet that’s not drinking and drugs #I’m going to take improv classes maybe I’ll finally be an actor or a comedian #there’s no reason to not try with everything I have #so I’m going to do that #and I’ll keep trying to put my heart into song #and I’ll keep trying to write despite not really knowing how #I wasn’t really made for this world but I’m so incredible either way #I just wish I had the tools to do something with myself #I don’t want to be passive anymore I just want to grab life by the whatever life has and be incredible and loud and me #I wish my ex would come back so I could live for him because living for myself is so hard #but I’ve been sober I’ve been in therapy I got accepted to grad school I’m moving forward #let’s do something with all of that

[sandsucks]

hmmm i want to download stardew valley (is being peer pressured) but idk if it’s better to download on my mac thru steam or the app store….

#does anyone know which one might be better? #i was studying w my friend n she was like “hold on you don’t let urself draw during the semester???” #n then she found out i also don’t play any games n was like what hell are you living in….anyway i’m thinking maybe cute farming will improve #my mental health n in turn motivate me to study harder idk #also drawing. i should do that too cuz girl screamed at me in the library for that #we’re aiming for the same career path tho except she doesn’t sleep while valuing her mental health sometimes n i don’t sleep while not #valuing my mental health at all #so maybe there’s some wisdom in her wisdom

[imidori-ya]

Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros is literal hot garbage and I will die on this hill.

#like it’s literally one of the worst constructed/written books I have ever encountered #how on earth could Yarros be married to a 20+ year military vet and yet still not even understand the most basic military concepts #it’s honestly astounding how brain dead her characters are #the way she writes makes it abundantly obvious that she thinks her readers are a bunch of idiots #who need every single story theme and element hand fed to them #the introduction of Varrish was just utter bullshit #she could have painted ‘VILLAIN’ on his forehead and it would’ve been less obvious #please tell us again how smart your main character is while she proceeds to do the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen #‘oh why won’t xaden trust me with rebellion secrets even though I basically announce my suspicions of the empire at every turn?’ #idk violet maybe it’s bc you won’t do the mind training they’ve been telling you to do #so you’re constantly vulnerable to the mindreader YOU KNOW PERSONALLY #maybe that’s why no one tells you anything??? #also holy shit her being like ‘I have to be careful and not let the empire know I’m questioning my duties’ #and then immediately crashing into a scribe meeting to request more red flag reading?? #like??? was she kicked in the head??? #also the dragons stating multiple times that humans are basically like ants to them and they don’t care if they live or die #but simultaneously having to somehow be subserveant to the military???? #bitch why weren’t you all enslaved by the dragons #this is such nonsense #also her prose is ass #come back when you can tell the difference between parse and parcel Rebecca #yeah a lot of my complaints are iron flame related #but that’s just bc it really hit home how bad this all is with the second book #net zero improvement #way to fail downwards Rebecca #ALSO!! what evil empire would conscript their enemies children into the one branch of their military where they get DRAGONS and SUPERPOWERS #like what??!! #in what world #what military would be so afraid of a new rebellion that they conscript the people with deep emotional ties to the old rebellion??? #if real militaries worked this way there would be no more war bc we’d all be dead

[tenssemble]

no i don’t care as long as i got you there, baby let’s keep falling… (x)

#ten #ten lee #birthday #wayv #nct #nct lab #TENNIE #let me SQUISH #gonna grab him by the waist and squeeze him like a toothpaste tube there’s no other option… #don’t know if i like these… they’re kinda too fast if that makes sense??? #and also the first one on loop is T-T #anyway… #i’m trying to get back into this bc i’m bored as hell #i’ll improve #tendalso

[im-gonna-draw]

More love for goth!Kieran! ❤️ He never get any attention!

#prince kieran #pixelberry #the cursed heart #the cursed heart 2 #I’m really trying to improve on my drawing/coloring #if you have any tips on how to get better #please let me know! #my art #background not mine!!