***Minors dni this Adult™️ stuff***
Postal Dude 2 NSFW Headcanons
Postal Dude is very experienced with sex. Having traveled basically everywhere and living all kinds of life’s, he’s fucked all kinds of people
Definitely had gay sex at some point, just to try. He’s been both top and bottom,,,
Dude’s dick is probably a little above average and he most definitely lets this get to his head.
When soft he’s like 3 inches, and it looks kinda cute (don’t tell him that), but when he’s hard he can grow up to 6 1/2 inches. Fully believes he could be a pornstar with that
His dick is about 2 shades darker than his body but at least it’s pretty! It stands up tall and has a good shape, veins popping out slightly when he’s about to cum
He can last pretty long before he cums, a strong 20 minutes💪 also his cum is yellow. Nothings wrong with him or anything, it’s just yellow for some reason.
Sadly, he is not a cum fountain… He could fill up about half a shot glass, but that’s it :((
Dude’s current mood entirely depends on how you will be fucked. He’s angry? You’re not walking tomorrow. He’s sleepy? He’s actually gentle! He’s high? It’s about to get reaallll passionate in here.
The first time you guys had sex he had to constantly remind you to relax. “Listen babe, you gotta relax down here if you don’t want it to hurt.” all while he uses his fingers to get you used to the feeling
For pussy havers, he likes to slide his fingers up and down your vagina, playing with your clit a little to get you nice and wet
For dick havers, he focuses mainly on your tip, dragging his fingers over the slit and jerking it ever so slightly before dipping down and fingering your hole
For both, he will be sucking on your nipples. Has an oral fixation and enjoys having anything in his mouth, pussy or dick, as long as he can lick and suck it.
Dude’s thrusts are pretty hard and consistent at least, almost fully taking out his dick before slamming it back in. Probably likes to hear the wet sound and slapping, makes him feel like he’s doing a good job
Makes little noise other than the occasional grunt and groan. Born to cry during sex, forced to shut the fuck up; unless you tell him you like his noises. He will be all up in your ear sounding like that turtle (you know which one)
I’ll add more if I can think of any :p
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could we get some postal 2 graphics? :] he is my sillays…. ty in advance!!
Postal 2 Graphic !
Art does not belong to me! Sorry for making only one but I am getting ready 4 school
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Every once in awhile I'll remember Running With Scissors responding to a transphobic gimmick account on Twitter and my day will instantly get ten times better
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